WEBVTT - The Lost BA Episode + an interview with Dr. Imani Walker

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<v Speaker 1>Hey, hey va fam.

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<v Speaker 2>All right, this is our last episode of twenty twenty one.

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<v Speaker 2>I cannot believe it. This has been a year of

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<v Speaker 2>so many ups and downs, twist and turns, and especially

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<v Speaker 2>these last few weeks, as we have been throwing our

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<v Speaker 2>love and our support and our condolences to our beloved

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<v Speaker 2>Tiffany in her time of need after such an unimaginable loss,

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<v Speaker 2>it just got me thinking how grateful I am for

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<v Speaker 2>this space that we have created, this community that we

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<v Speaker 2>have created these past six and a half years, And

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<v Speaker 2>I just wanted to say thank you to each and

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<v Speaker 2>every one of you who has listened to the show,

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<v Speaker 2>supported our show for so long. Thank you for your

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<v Speaker 2>patience as we give Tiffany the time that she needs

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<v Speaker 2>to heal, and we look forward to seeing you again

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<v Speaker 2>in twenty twenty two. Now, to close out the year,

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<v Speaker 2>what better way than by sharing the very first episode

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<v Speaker 2>of Brown Ambition. For a long time, I thought this

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<v Speaker 2>episode was lost forever. I thought the Internet had gobbled

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<v Speaker 2>it up and it is just gone. But thanks to

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<v Speaker 2>a beloved member of the BA team I'm talking to you, Dennis,

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<v Speaker 2>we managed to dig up this old original episode of BA.

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<v Speaker 2>And when I tell you these babies. The way that

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<v Speaker 2>we talked about everything from love and money to work

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<v Speaker 2>and family. It honestly gives me chills when I look

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<v Speaker 2>back and listen to this first episode, and I hope

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<v Speaker 2>you guys enjoy it. After the show, stick around to

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<v Speaker 2>hear one of our favorite guest interviews with doctor Imani Walker.

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<v Speaker 2>If you guys haven't had a chance to listen to

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<v Speaker 2>our interview with doctor Imani Walker, this is one, especially

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<v Speaker 2>after another year where the forbidden Panini continues to rage on.

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<v Speaker 2>We've all been through so much highs and lows, twist

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<v Speaker 2>and turns. As I've said, doctor Emani has some really

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<v Speaker 2>useful advice on how we can protect our mental health

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<v Speaker 2>heading into the new year. Thank you again for always listening,

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<v Speaker 2>and we'll see you next year.

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<v Speaker 3>Y'all. Hey everyone, I'm Mandy.

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<v Speaker 1>Hey, it's Tiphany and this is Brown Ambition.

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<v Speaker 2>I've been a reporter in New York City for five years.

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<v Speaker 2>Right now, I'm a writer at Yahoo Finance. I write

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<v Speaker 2>about money, business career, basically anything to do with the

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<v Speaker 2>world and.

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<v Speaker 3>How it impacts your wallet.

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<v Speaker 4>And I am Tiffany but much better known as the

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<v Speaker 4>Budget Lista and I'm a financial educator, bestselling author, speaker, teacher,

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<v Speaker 4>all things personal finance.

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<v Speaker 1>Basically, on this podcast.

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<v Speaker 4>We're going to be talking about career, relationships, life and

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<v Speaker 4>living in this brown skin.

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<v Speaker 2>We work, we start businesses, we help one another. We

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<v Speaker 2>do everything we can to make a better life for ourselves.

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<v Speaker 2>And that's what Brown Ambition.

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<v Speaker 3>Is all about.

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<v Speaker 2>So here are some topics you might hear us talk

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<v Speaker 2>about on the podcast.

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<v Speaker 1>How to deal with office bullies and microaggressions.

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<v Speaker 2>Coping with being the only one in the.

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<v Speaker 4>Office, Yes, how to get money for a new business

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<v Speaker 4>even when you have no idea what you're doing. Should

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<v Speaker 4>you care if people think you have resting bitch base guilty?

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<v Speaker 3>What to do when bee earns less.

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<v Speaker 4>Than you guilty guilty, Whether or not we should use

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<v Speaker 4>the word bae in everyday conversation.

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<v Speaker 3>I have a lot of thoughts about this. Well, thank

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<v Speaker 3>you so much for joining us.

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<v Speaker 2>Guys. We're going to start off the podcast by talking

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<v Speaker 2>about some buzzworthy headlines that are cropping up in our lives,

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<v Speaker 2>and we want to talk.

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<v Speaker 3>More about this week's buzzworthy.

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<v Speaker 1>Yes, I'm excited about this one.

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<v Speaker 2>I think I know. I'm excited to have a lot

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<v Speaker 2>of opinions about this, and.

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<v Speaker 3>So does the rest of America.

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<v Speaker 2>Yes, so many opinions on how a young woman today

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<v Speaker 2>decides the right time to step into motherhood.

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<v Speaker 1>Yes, baby limbo, baby.

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<v Speaker 3>Limbo, it's this, you know.

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<v Speaker 2>I kind of came up with this terminology for a

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<v Speaker 2>story I did on young people millennials eighteen up to

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<v Speaker 2>their mid thirties who are stuck between do I have

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<v Speaker 2>this college debt or do you know, pay that off

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<v Speaker 2>and focus on my career, or do I also have

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<v Speaker 2>a baby or you know, what should come first? And honestly,

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<v Speaker 2>it's such a difficult question because mother nature doesn't wait

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<v Speaker 2>for you to pay off your student linked debt. And

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<v Speaker 2>I think that women have to recognize that fact. And

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<v Speaker 2>it's maybe not so comfortable because you know, obviously we

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<v Speaker 2>want to talk about how much control we should have

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<v Speaker 2>over our own bodies, which is absolutely true. You should,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, be your own body's boss. But at the

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<v Speaker 2>end of the day, like that clock is ticking.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, it's true.

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<v Speaker 4>So I'm thirty five and I turned thirty six in October,

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<v Speaker 4>which is not far away, and I mean, I've been

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<v Speaker 4>thinking about it a lot because I am in a

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<v Speaker 4>serious relationship me and my boyfriend Superman, he already has

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<v Speaker 4>a daughter.

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<v Speaker 1>She's eight.

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<v Speaker 2>She's great daytaking a man with a daughter. That's some

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<v Speaker 2>grown up dating.

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah, but I love it, honestly, because one, I'm at

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<v Speaker 4>an age now and because I work for myself, I

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<v Speaker 4>realize I don't necessarily want a huge family. I came

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<v Speaker 4>from a family there was five girls. My mom and

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<v Speaker 4>dad raised all five of us. And I don't know

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<v Speaker 4>that I want a big family, but I at least

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<v Speaker 4>think I'm pretty sure I want at least one kid

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<v Speaker 4>of my own. I mean, according to my mom, I

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<v Speaker 4>really need to get on it. And I kind of

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<v Speaker 4>feel like that too. My best friend just had a baby,

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<v Speaker 4>and my sister just had a baby, and so their

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<v Speaker 4>babies are all under a year.

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<v Speaker 1>Old, and so I've been like, yeah, a little bit,

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<v Speaker 1>But sometimes you're overt.

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<v Speaker 4>More so than I'm like, Oh, I'm gonna be thirty six,

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<v Speaker 4>so when are you gonna make a choice. A friend

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<v Speaker 4>of mine had she made her choice at thirty six

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<v Speaker 4>and had her baby at thirty seven, and she said,

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<v Speaker 4>I wish I would have started sooner.

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<v Speaker 3>That's what I hear.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm afraid, yeah, sooner would be I'm twenty eight right now,

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<v Speaker 2>and I feel like, am I going to regret not

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<v Speaker 2>having a baby now? I don't know, but it seems

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<v Speaker 2>like I just don't want to do it.

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<v Speaker 4>Her reason for saying she wish she would have started

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<v Speaker 4>sooner is that she wished She really wants to have

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<v Speaker 4>a second, and she doesn't know if she can. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 4>she can. So that's why I don't know that I

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<v Speaker 4>want to have a second. I mean, I would want

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<v Speaker 4>to have two kids, but between his one and my one,

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<v Speaker 4>I'm like, well, there it goes one plus one.

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<v Speaker 1>Max two for free.

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<v Speaker 4>Yes, she's the bonus kid and so and plus I

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<v Speaker 4>do so much work and I really want to and

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<v Speaker 4>I know this might sound a little selfish, but I

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<v Speaker 4>want to maintain my individual personality and maintain okay, you know,

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<v Speaker 4>as long as you know. I mean, I think selfish

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<v Speaker 4>would be more so having ten kids and still wanting

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<v Speaker 4>to fly around.

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<v Speaker 1>The country and speak and teach. And you don't have

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<v Speaker 1>enough time for your children. So I don't want to

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<v Speaker 1>spread myself super thin.

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<v Speaker 2>Right m h, Well, hopefully you just have one kid

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<v Speaker 2>to start.

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<v Speaker 1>I know, Well, my boyfriends are twins, so.

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<v Speaker 4>He is, Oh jesus, I'm like yo, he told me.

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<v Speaker 4>I already Like, so I'm aiming for this.

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<v Speaker 2>Does that gene come from the male line or that

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<v Speaker 2>is more likely.

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<v Speaker 1>To go somebody, somebody email us.

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<v Speaker 3>At Brown Ambition Podcast, yes.

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<v Speaker 4>And tell us how exactly are twins formulated? Does that

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<v Speaker 4>come from the male line, the female line? Is that? Yeah?

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<v Speaker 1>Is it hereditary or is that like some sort of

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<v Speaker 1>random I do.

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<v Speaker 2>Think it skips a generation. So you might be good. Okay,

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<v Speaker 2>maybe you're If you have a daughter, then she's got

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<v Speaker 2>to worry.

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<v Speaker 1>But you're good. So so you say.

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<v Speaker 4>And so I come back to the next podcast and

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<v Speaker 4>I'm like, so, y'all, I'm having twins.

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<v Speaker 1>Thanks Manny, I can talk well.

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<v Speaker 2>You know, I'm twenty eight, and I don't necessarily feel

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<v Speaker 2>pressure to have a baby, Okay, but I feel I

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<v Speaker 2>guess that's not true. I don't feel pressure from myself, Okay,

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<v Speaker 2>I don't. I look at puppies and I feel my

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<v Speaker 2>my ovaries twins, like I really want a puppy very badly.

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<v Speaker 2>Babies not so much, but they're cute. What I do

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<v Speaker 2>feel is intense pressure from you know, I'm dating. I've

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<v Speaker 2>been dating my partner boyfriend for through over three years. Now,

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<v Speaker 2>which is my longest relationship, and you know, we live

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<v Speaker 2>together and we're kind of we're kind of playing it

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<v Speaker 2>as we you know by ear. His family, however, is

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<v Speaker 2>not waiting, especially his mother. He comes from a very traditional,

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<v Speaker 2>close knit community and family. I guess it's not giving

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<v Speaker 2>away too much if I says Dominican. So I'm in

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<v Speaker 2>a mixed race relationship. And his mother is very Catholic

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<v Speaker 2>and very old school and she is like the mother

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<v Speaker 2>of mothers. She lives to nurture her son's two sons.

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<v Speaker 2>They are schooled rotten. But you know, I feel her

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<v Speaker 2>looking at me and wondering. Not just feel, but I

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<v Speaker 2>hear it because she tells me, Mandy, Amanda, why why

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<v Speaker 2>no baby? Why? Her English isn't very good, but she

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<v Speaker 2>can she gets her point across.

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<v Speaker 1>Where's the baby yet?

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<v Speaker 3>Where it's been three years?

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<v Speaker 2>I asked her, you know, uh, don't she want us

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<v Speaker 2>to get married first and get married and do all

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<v Speaker 2>that and you know, the right order of events.

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<v Speaker 1>And she's like, no, just have a baby.

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<v Speaker 2>Wow?

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<v Speaker 1>Would this be her first grandchild?

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<v Speaker 3>This will be her first grandchild.

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<v Speaker 1>There's so much pressure.

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<v Speaker 4>I know, what how about you come from a family

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<v Speaker 4>of five girls, and no one has kids. My mother

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<v Speaker 4>every day on the phone, so my my Nigerian name

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<v Speaker 4>is Adoci.

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<v Speaker 1>My mother would call me and say, it's so adult.

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<v Speaker 4>She's still not married, still no baby, and I'm like,

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<v Speaker 4>good oldest, no second oldest, Okay.

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<v Speaker 1>So they're just like so somebody that the oldest.

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<v Speaker 4>Is married and she's working on it, and I'm the second.

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<v Speaker 4>The third is not married, the fourth is married and

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<v Speaker 4>she just had a baby, so we're like whoo, and

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<v Speaker 4>but just watching her. She's literally like the milk machine.

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<v Speaker 4>So she's only allowed to take ten paces away from

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<v Speaker 4>the baby before the milk machine has to return and

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<v Speaker 4>dispense milk.

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<v Speaker 2>You mean, it's not glamorous, and she's not like Blake

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<v Speaker 2>Lively taking selfies of herself, you know, breastfeeding in a

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<v Speaker 2>field of sunflowers.

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<v Speaker 4>That is a straight because honestly, she's like, I'm so tired.

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<v Speaker 4>Her feet are swollen, and she's just like, how can

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<v Speaker 4>I My mom is like, my mom is a nurse,

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<v Speaker 4>and her my mom was telling her you need to

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<v Speaker 4>put your feet up.

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<v Speaker 1>She's like, oh, when when I'm beeting the milk machine.

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<v Speaker 2>I work for a company and obviously y'allhoo has very

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<v Speaker 2>generous maternity and paternity benefit programs, which isn't the norm nationwide.

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<v Speaker 2>It's actually America is one of the only developing nations

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<v Speaker 2>that doesn't have a federally mandated and paid maternity or

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<v Speaker 2>paternity leading law. But I'm lucky enough to work for

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<v Speaker 2>y'allhoo and we have sixteen weeks off. That's awesome, And

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<v Speaker 2>dads get eight weeks off, and at least I know

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<v Speaker 2>I have that, Yeah, sort of if I'm still working,

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<v Speaker 2>you're gonna have a baby, have that kind of cushion.

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<v Speaker 2>But can you talk about, like I'm curious as an

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<v Speaker 2>entrepreneur's self, you know, you own your own business, how

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<v Speaker 2>are you going to plan your leave?

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<v Speaker 4>So I've been like, honestly like kind of like planning

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<v Speaker 4>now because I'm going to be thirty six, like I said,

0:10:26.600 --> 0:10:28.719
<v Speaker 4>and I mentioned, and my boyfriend and I have been

0:10:28.720 --> 0:10:31.320
<v Speaker 4>talking about marriage and kids. So right now, the way

0:10:31.320 --> 0:10:33.600
<v Speaker 4>my business is is that I start off at zero

0:10:33.679 --> 0:10:36.320
<v Speaker 4>basically like every month, meaning like my income, I never

0:10:36.400 --> 0:10:38.600
<v Speaker 4>know what's going to come in. People would just email

0:10:38.679 --> 0:10:40.640
<v Speaker 4>me and call me and say we want you to

0:10:40.640 --> 0:10:42.440
<v Speaker 4>speak or teach or whatever, and so as a month

0:10:42.520 --> 0:10:45.240
<v Speaker 4>rolls on I make money. I cannot do that and

0:10:45.480 --> 0:10:48.319
<v Speaker 4>the kid because one, you know, I'm gonna have to

0:10:48.320 --> 0:10:50.320
<v Speaker 4>be home. I do a lot of speaking around the country,

0:10:50.400 --> 0:10:52.640
<v Speaker 4>you know, so that's a worry for me. So I thought, well,

0:10:52.640 --> 0:10:54.520
<v Speaker 4>how am I going to make this work? So one

0:10:54.559 --> 0:10:56.840
<v Speaker 4>of the things I'm implementing is I'm looking for other

0:10:56.880 --> 0:10:59.559
<v Speaker 4>ways to make passive income. So I have two books

0:10:59.559 --> 0:11:01.599
<v Speaker 4>that do fear really well. I'm coming out with a

0:11:01.640 --> 0:11:03.960
<v Speaker 4>children's book hopefully that will boost up my income. In

0:11:04.040 --> 0:11:07.360
<v Speaker 4>two I'm launching this academy called the Live Richer Academy,

0:11:07.720 --> 0:11:09.839
<v Speaker 4>where it's going to be like a monthly fee and

0:11:09.880 --> 0:11:12.320
<v Speaker 4>you can take classes on investing and business and all

0:11:12.320 --> 0:11:14.440
<v Speaker 4>this kind of stuff. And so the Live Richer Academy

0:11:14.440 --> 0:11:18.320
<v Speaker 4>will definitely help to put regular income into my stream

0:11:18.320 --> 0:11:20.000
<v Speaker 4>without me having to leave the house because I'm not

0:11:20.040 --> 0:11:21.640
<v Speaker 4>going to be able to, at least not for a while.

0:11:21.760 --> 0:11:24.360
<v Speaker 4>So I'd love to hear what the BA audience has

0:11:24.400 --> 0:11:28.280
<v Speaker 4>to say. Tweet us at the BA Podcast. You can

0:11:28.280 --> 0:11:31.640
<v Speaker 4>find us on Facebook at Brown Ambition, and you can

0:11:31.679 --> 0:11:36.120
<v Speaker 4>email us at Brownambitionpodcast at gmail dot com.

0:11:36.200 --> 0:11:38.000
<v Speaker 1>Let us know are you and baby Limbo? What is

0:11:38.040 --> 0:11:38.600
<v Speaker 1>your story.

0:11:38.960 --> 0:11:41.680
<v Speaker 4>We'd love to hear it, maybe share it next time

0:11:41.760 --> 0:11:54.880
<v Speaker 4>we're on. So next up, this is one of my

0:11:54.920 --> 0:11:58.640
<v Speaker 4>favorite segments. It is brown break.

0:11:59.040 --> 0:12:01.319
<v Speaker 3>Brown bread, some music.

0:12:01.440 --> 0:12:02.640
<v Speaker 1>Yes, it's like break.

0:12:06.960 --> 0:12:09.920
<v Speaker 4>Man's gonna really how about you share? Like what what

0:12:10.000 --> 0:12:10.800
<v Speaker 4>is a brown bakman?

0:12:11.520 --> 0:12:14.880
<v Speaker 2>A brown break is just something in your life that

0:12:15.000 --> 0:12:17.719
<v Speaker 2>you are tired of having to deal with or explain

0:12:18.000 --> 0:12:18.360
<v Speaker 2>as a.

0:12:18.280 --> 0:12:22.520
<v Speaker 3>Person of color. And this week, my brown.

0:12:22.280 --> 0:12:26.240
<v Speaker 2>Break is white feminism. This is a very uncomfortable issue.

0:12:26.280 --> 0:12:28.040
<v Speaker 2>I know, we like to keep things light and fun

0:12:28.160 --> 0:12:31.160
<v Speaker 2>as much as we can, but white feminism is something

0:12:31.200 --> 0:12:33.240
<v Speaker 2>that I'm starting to learn a little bit more about

0:12:34.400 --> 0:12:37.640
<v Speaker 2>and just to give some background on what brought me

0:12:37.720 --> 0:12:41.640
<v Speaker 2>to this necessary break in my life. So two of

0:12:41.640 --> 0:12:44.320
<v Speaker 2>my favorite authors for very different reasons. These authors couldn't

0:12:44.360 --> 0:12:49.880
<v Speaker 2>be more different. Erica Jong amazing author, very popular in

0:12:49.920 --> 0:12:52.280
<v Speaker 2>the seventies and popular even now. She's a new book

0:12:52.320 --> 0:12:55.040
<v Speaker 2>coming out. She was seen as sort of like one

0:12:55.040 --> 0:12:58.280
<v Speaker 2>of the first female writers to really embrace women's sexuality,

0:12:58.720 --> 0:13:02.040
<v Speaker 2>writing about a woman who's had sex and saying curse

0:13:02.120 --> 0:13:05.839
<v Speaker 2>words and sleeping around with no apology. And she did

0:13:05.840 --> 0:13:08.319
<v Speaker 2>a talk recently at the Decatur Book Festival shout out

0:13:08.320 --> 0:13:12.080
<v Speaker 2>to Atlanta, my hometown with Rox Sane Gay, another one

0:13:12.120 --> 0:13:15.320
<v Speaker 2>of my favorite authors. She's the author of Bad Feminist.

0:13:15.440 --> 0:13:18.480
<v Speaker 2>And someone asks Erica Jong how she feels about white

0:13:18.480 --> 0:13:24.280
<v Speaker 2>feminism and the concept of white women generally speaking about

0:13:24.280 --> 0:13:28.280
<v Speaker 2>feminists in a way that can sometimes exclude women of color.

0:13:28.760 --> 0:13:31.240
<v Speaker 2>And this is not a new issue. It's been around

0:13:31.280 --> 0:13:34.360
<v Speaker 2>since the seventies, when the first or not even the seventies,

0:13:34.360 --> 0:13:35.719
<v Speaker 2>but you know, when women were trying to get the

0:13:35.800 --> 0:13:38.120
<v Speaker 2>right to vote. Cut to the seventies, when women were

0:13:38.160 --> 0:13:41.960
<v Speaker 2>fighting for equal pay and things like that, and generally

0:13:42.480 --> 0:13:45.439
<v Speaker 2>white women would speak of feminism as if it only

0:13:45.440 --> 0:13:47.679
<v Speaker 2>applied from their point of view, and we weren't hearing

0:13:47.720 --> 0:13:50.840
<v Speaker 2>so much from black and brown women. So this is

0:13:50.840 --> 0:13:52.599
<v Speaker 2>something that I care a lot about. And I have

0:13:52.679 --> 0:13:55.960
<v Speaker 2>to say as someone who really respects Erica John, Erica

0:13:56.040 --> 0:13:57.920
<v Speaker 2>John from like the bottom of my heart, and I

0:13:57.960 --> 0:13:58.680
<v Speaker 2>love her writing.

0:13:59.040 --> 0:13:59.640
<v Speaker 1>The way that she.

0:13:59.679 --> 0:14:03.200
<v Speaker 2>Handled that wasn't I think the best way she could

0:14:03.240 --> 0:14:06.120
<v Speaker 2>have handled things. She got really defensive, and I can

0:14:06.240 --> 0:14:09.200
<v Speaker 2>understand why you'd be defensive because if you identify as

0:14:09.200 --> 0:14:11.720
<v Speaker 2>a feminist. And I give her so much respect, she

0:14:11.880 --> 0:14:15.040
<v Speaker 2>has done so much for the cause for feminism in

0:14:15.080 --> 0:14:19.480
<v Speaker 2>America and supported so many women, but she immediately was

0:14:19.920 --> 0:14:21.760
<v Speaker 2>discounting the whole white feminism thing.

0:14:21.840 --> 0:14:22.680
<v Speaker 3>Oh no, of course not.

0:14:23.040 --> 0:14:25.040
<v Speaker 2>You know, Oh, We've done so much for all women

0:14:25.040 --> 0:14:27.120
<v Speaker 2>of color, all women of color. You know, everything I've

0:14:27.120 --> 0:14:30.200
<v Speaker 2>done has been through this lens of you know, all women,

0:14:30.280 --> 0:14:32.840
<v Speaker 2>all women, And it just seemed like a second iteration

0:14:32.920 --> 0:14:35.960
<v Speaker 2>of the whole all lives matter thing. And you know,

0:14:36.000 --> 0:14:38.320
<v Speaker 2>we kind of saw this play out with the whole

0:14:38.400 --> 0:14:41.680
<v Speaker 2>Nicki Minaj and Taylor Swift beef on Twitter where Nikki's

0:14:41.720 --> 0:14:43.800
<v Speaker 2>trying to make a statement about how black women are

0:14:43.800 --> 0:14:46.240
<v Speaker 2>treated in the music industry, and then Taylor comes in

0:14:46.280 --> 0:14:47.160
<v Speaker 2>and talks about, why are you.

0:14:47.120 --> 0:14:47.920
<v Speaker 3>Trying to make it about you?

0:14:48.360 --> 0:14:51.320
<v Speaker 2>All women in music industry are marginalized and you know,

0:14:51.360 --> 0:14:55.200
<v Speaker 2>sexualized in different ways and disenfranchised. But no, Taylor, No,

0:14:56.000 --> 0:14:58.840
<v Speaker 2>Black women and women of color are way more likely

0:14:58.960 --> 0:15:02.040
<v Speaker 2>to be marginalized in the music industry and not just there.

0:15:02.360 --> 0:15:05.040
<v Speaker 2>Let's talk about in terms of like the wage gap.

0:15:05.520 --> 0:15:08.760
<v Speaker 2>That's a huge cornerstone of the feminist movement today is

0:15:08.800 --> 0:15:11.320
<v Speaker 2>the fact that women are still earning less than eight

0:15:11.680 --> 0:15:14.800
<v Speaker 2>eighty cents on the dollar for a man. What gets

0:15:14.920 --> 0:15:17.520
<v Speaker 2>lost when you stop the conversation. There is the fact

0:15:17.560 --> 0:15:20.240
<v Speaker 2>that Latina and black women are much more likely to

0:15:20.280 --> 0:15:23.520
<v Speaker 2>make less than that. And yeah, I'm just over I'm

0:15:23.520 --> 0:15:27.560
<v Speaker 2>over people stopping the conversation. At here's what it looks

0:15:27.560 --> 0:15:29.800
<v Speaker 2>like for all women, because all women don't have the

0:15:29.800 --> 0:15:30.760
<v Speaker 2>same story exactly.

0:15:31.200 --> 0:15:32.760
<v Speaker 1>So you need a brown break from white.

0:15:33.440 --> 0:15:38.320
<v Speaker 4>So my brown break is this whole debate of perm

0:15:38.440 --> 0:15:39.680
<v Speaker 4>versus natural rap.

0:15:41.640 --> 0:15:45.960
<v Speaker 2>So I am sitting with my fed up like my

0:15:46.080 --> 0:15:48.760
<v Speaker 2>half perm, half relaxed awkward transition face.

0:15:48.840 --> 0:15:51.360
<v Speaker 4>So many's half and half right, And here I am

0:15:51.400 --> 0:15:54.200
<v Speaker 4>fully natural. I have locks for the last like seven years.

0:15:54.200 --> 0:15:56.840
<v Speaker 4>But honestly, I've been natural since I want to say,

0:15:57.160 --> 0:16:00.440
<v Speaker 4>two thousand and one. I don't Matt good so I

0:16:00.560 --> 0:16:01.080
<v Speaker 4>know how many years.

0:16:01.080 --> 0:16:02.600
<v Speaker 3>I fifteen years.

0:16:02.680 --> 0:16:05.000
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, I was honestly natural for the majority of my life.

0:16:05.040 --> 0:16:08.160
<v Speaker 4>I had a perm. Yeah, I was like totally like

0:16:08.240 --> 0:16:11.240
<v Speaker 4>the natural girl before it became cool when I went natural.

0:16:11.280 --> 0:16:14.040
<v Speaker 4>At first, I had honestly, here's where I went natural.

0:16:14.120 --> 0:16:16.720
<v Speaker 4>So all throughout high school I had I had a

0:16:16.840 --> 0:16:20.280
<v Speaker 4>natural hair. I had braids, the Brandy braids for those

0:16:20.280 --> 0:16:22.080
<v Speaker 4>of you who can remember Brandy Norwood.

0:16:22.600 --> 0:16:25.920
<v Speaker 1>Mm hmm. I want to be damn.

0:16:26.880 --> 0:16:30.040
<v Speaker 4>So so I had the braids because I played sports.

0:16:30.080 --> 0:16:32.560
<v Speaker 4>I played tennis, and so it didn't make sense for

0:16:32.600 --> 0:16:36.240
<v Speaker 4>me to have a perm and have palms hair and

0:16:36.400 --> 0:16:40.080
<v Speaker 4>played sports, and so I was natural mostly all my life.

0:16:40.120 --> 0:16:42.200
<v Speaker 1>And then when I went away to college, I was like, oh,

0:16:42.280 --> 0:16:42.960
<v Speaker 1>I want a PERM.

0:16:43.000 --> 0:16:45.040
<v Speaker 4>I felt like perm was like the next level of

0:16:45.080 --> 0:16:48.240
<v Speaker 4>like womanhood for black women, and so I got a

0:16:48.240 --> 0:16:50.640
<v Speaker 4>PERM and two years in my hair.

0:16:50.480 --> 0:16:54.160
<v Speaker 1>Started to fall out, like I had alopecia. So alopecia

0:16:54.200 --> 0:16:54.680
<v Speaker 1>is really.

0:16:54.480 --> 0:16:57.320
<v Speaker 2>Wet putting a very toxic chemical and your hair wasn't.

0:16:57.120 --> 0:16:59.880
<v Speaker 4>Good for it, I know, And so my styl of

0:17:00.280 --> 0:17:03.280
<v Speaker 4>was like, you know what, Tiffany, your texture of hair.

0:17:03.480 --> 0:17:06.600
<v Speaker 4>It's just like I have really really tightly coiled hair

0:17:06.640 --> 0:17:09.440
<v Speaker 4>and it just was not blending well with the perm.

0:17:09.560 --> 0:17:11.840
<v Speaker 4>So literally the side started good go first, and then

0:17:11.880 --> 0:17:14.240
<v Speaker 4>the back and the front, and then finally she was like,

0:17:14.240 --> 0:17:16.520
<v Speaker 4>you're just gonna have to let the perm go, and

0:17:16.560 --> 0:17:18.240
<v Speaker 4>so I cut off all of the perm and I

0:17:18.240 --> 0:17:21.280
<v Speaker 4>was left with this spiky fro, and I realized it

0:17:21.320 --> 0:17:23.239
<v Speaker 4>was too short to get braided, so I was kind

0:17:23.280 --> 0:17:27.080
<v Speaker 4>of forced to walk around with spike fro, and I had,

0:17:27.320 --> 0:17:29.359
<v Speaker 4>so it started to grow out, and I kind of

0:17:29.440 --> 0:17:29.800
<v Speaker 4>liked the fro.

0:17:29.960 --> 0:17:30.480
<v Speaker 1>It was cute.

0:17:30.480 --> 0:17:33.479
<v Speaker 4>It was a cute little afro mini afro. But women

0:17:34.160 --> 0:17:36.879
<v Speaker 4>and older black women started stopping me in the street

0:17:36.920 --> 0:17:38.800
<v Speaker 4>and literally saying, why would you do that to yourself?

0:17:39.960 --> 0:17:42.920
<v Speaker 4>My my wasn't my mother and my father either one

0:17:42.920 --> 0:17:45.080
<v Speaker 4>of them. One of them said to me, so you

0:17:45.160 --> 0:17:49.240
<v Speaker 4>don't plan to Maddy, I'll translate, so you never want.

0:17:49.080 --> 0:17:49.639
<v Speaker 1>To get married.

0:17:49.640 --> 0:17:52.040
<v Speaker 4>I was like, excuse me, So you don't want to, Mattie,

0:17:52.040 --> 0:17:53.679
<v Speaker 4>that's what this hair is seen, that's what this is

0:17:53.680 --> 0:17:54.320
<v Speaker 4>what my so.

0:17:54.240 --> 0:17:54.960
<v Speaker 3>You're putting out there.

0:17:55.000 --> 0:17:57.159
<v Speaker 4>Yes, so this is what I was told. So I

0:17:57.160 --> 0:18:01.919
<v Speaker 4>couldn't believe how. I don't know, just like how politicized

0:18:01.960 --> 0:18:04.359
<v Speaker 4>my hair was. I literally just stopped getting a perm

0:18:04.400 --> 0:18:07.000
<v Speaker 4>because I was going bald. I wasn't trying to make

0:18:07.000 --> 0:18:10.400
<v Speaker 4>a statement. I wasn't trying to, I don't know, trying

0:18:10.440 --> 0:18:13.520
<v Speaker 4>to like prove my blackness. It was, hey, I'd like

0:18:13.600 --> 0:18:15.440
<v Speaker 4>not to be bald. Let me go back to the

0:18:15.480 --> 0:18:16.199
<v Speaker 4>where my hair was.

0:18:16.520 --> 0:18:17.640
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, very practical.

0:18:17.760 --> 0:18:20.120
<v Speaker 4>But what I found was with time, as time went on,

0:18:20.800 --> 0:18:22.600
<v Speaker 4>I found that people were politicizing it.

0:18:22.640 --> 0:18:24.520
<v Speaker 1>For me. I would go to like Harlem or New York,

0:18:24.520 --> 0:18:25.359
<v Speaker 1>and people.

0:18:25.119 --> 0:18:27.600
<v Speaker 4>Would say hey, sister, like they would treat me differently

0:18:27.600 --> 0:18:29.320
<v Speaker 4>than my friends who I was walking with who had

0:18:29.320 --> 0:18:31.880
<v Speaker 4>a perm. You know, I wasn't when men even would

0:18:31.920 --> 0:18:34.239
<v Speaker 4>approach me, it wasn't the same like hey, shorty, what up?

0:18:34.280 --> 0:18:34.439
<v Speaker 4>You know?

0:18:34.520 --> 0:18:36.199
<v Speaker 1>It was like Hi, I just want to tell you

0:18:36.200 --> 0:18:37.080
<v Speaker 1>that you're so beautiful.

0:18:37.080 --> 0:18:40.080
<v Speaker 4>And it was different, and I thought that was so yeah,

0:18:40.320 --> 0:18:43.199
<v Speaker 4>so strange, and but now what's happened. At first it

0:18:43.240 --> 0:18:44.920
<v Speaker 4>was like I was so happy to see that people

0:18:44.960 --> 0:18:47.920
<v Speaker 4>were embracing their natural hair, and I was like, yeah, yeah, yay,

0:18:48.560 --> 0:18:51.480
<v Speaker 4>But now what's happened. It's like there's two camps. There's

0:18:51.480 --> 0:18:54.600
<v Speaker 4>the perm camp and there's their natural camp. And sometimes

0:18:54.640 --> 0:18:56.600
<v Speaker 4>I find that each camp is like looking down on

0:18:56.640 --> 0:18:59.920
<v Speaker 4>each other, right, And I'm like, to me, it's just hair.

0:19:00.080 --> 0:19:02.800
<v Speaker 4>It's just a choice, like a dress or pants or shoes,

0:19:02.880 --> 0:19:04.520
<v Speaker 4>and you should be able to make your choice, and

0:19:04.560 --> 0:19:07.200
<v Speaker 4>you shouldn't be shamed for having a perm. You shouldn't

0:19:07.200 --> 0:19:09.560
<v Speaker 4>be shamed for being natural. When to me, it should

0:19:09.600 --> 0:19:11.880
<v Speaker 4>just be an expression of like just how you want

0:19:11.880 --> 0:19:14.760
<v Speaker 4>to look today, you know, or even if you want

0:19:14.760 --> 0:19:16.360
<v Speaker 4>to make it, if you want to make it politici.

0:19:16.480 --> 0:19:17.679
<v Speaker 1>That's fine, but that's just not me.

0:19:26.359 --> 0:19:29.240
<v Speaker 4>And we're here and we're back, and we are going

0:19:29.280 --> 0:19:32.919
<v Speaker 4>to give you some tips brown ambition tips for today.

0:19:33.720 --> 0:19:35.680
<v Speaker 3>So what are your tips for today? Tips?

0:19:35.720 --> 0:19:39.040
<v Speaker 4>So my main tip for today really is for those

0:19:39.080 --> 0:19:41.480
<v Speaker 4>of you who are starting a business. If this is

0:19:41.480 --> 0:19:44.040
<v Speaker 4>a very first kind of stage of your business, you

0:19:44.160 --> 0:19:46.040
<v Speaker 4>have to make a decision of whether or not you

0:19:46.160 --> 0:19:46.960
<v Speaker 4>want to be.

0:19:47.000 --> 0:19:50.399
<v Speaker 1>A business or look like a business. Right, so this

0:19:50.520 --> 0:19:51.000
<v Speaker 1>is a business.

0:19:51.040 --> 0:19:53.560
<v Speaker 4>There's a fourteen year old girl on your block who

0:19:53.760 --> 0:19:56.440
<v Speaker 4>babysits and she gets paid to. She has a business,

0:19:56.960 --> 0:19:59.520
<v Speaker 4>no very informal, but a business nonetheless, because a business

0:19:59.560 --> 0:20:02.080
<v Speaker 4>is just when you have a product or service that

0:20:02.200 --> 0:20:04.919
<v Speaker 4>somebody wants to buy and they do. Now, if you

0:20:05.560 --> 0:20:07.800
<v Speaker 4>look like a business, looks all fancy. You have your

0:20:07.800 --> 0:20:10.520
<v Speaker 4>business cards and pens and everything, but haven't made a sale.

0:20:10.840 --> 0:20:13.000
<v Speaker 1>The fourteen year old has a business. You do not.

0:20:14.000 --> 0:20:16.119
<v Speaker 4>So here's how I can help you get to a

0:20:16.119 --> 0:20:18.840
<v Speaker 4>place where you can actually make money on your business. First,

0:20:19.240 --> 0:20:21.359
<v Speaker 4>you want to make sure that that your return on

0:20:21.480 --> 0:20:23.840
<v Speaker 4>there's a direct return on investments in the things that

0:20:23.880 --> 0:20:26.280
<v Speaker 4>you buy. So what that means is this that anything

0:20:26.320 --> 0:20:29.440
<v Speaker 4>that you're buying in the beginning stages of your business

0:20:29.520 --> 0:20:31.320
<v Speaker 4>should directly make you money.

0:20:31.480 --> 0:20:33.400
<v Speaker 1>So let's just say you want to be a baker.

0:20:34.080 --> 0:20:35.440
<v Speaker 1>If you want to be a baker.

0:20:35.680 --> 0:20:38.600
<v Speaker 4>Getting a bakery is not going to directly make you money.

0:20:38.760 --> 0:20:41.359
<v Speaker 4>Having business cards is not going to directly make you money.

0:20:41.520 --> 0:20:45.280
<v Speaker 4>That looks like a business. That's not a business. Eggs, flour,

0:20:46.000 --> 0:20:50.640
<v Speaker 4>sugar shortening, vanilla seasoning, whatever, those things will directly make

0:20:50.680 --> 0:20:53.040
<v Speaker 4>you money because you can bake them, to make bake

0:20:53.119 --> 0:20:55.919
<v Speaker 4>goods and sell them. So in the beginning, I really

0:20:56.080 --> 0:20:59.600
<v Speaker 4>urge new entrepreneurs to really only put your money into

0:20:59.640 --> 0:21:02.760
<v Speaker 4>things that you can directly repackage and make you money.

0:21:02.960 --> 0:21:06.400
<v Speaker 2>You're speaking to my dad right now, I think, Hey,

0:21:06.520 --> 0:21:10.320
<v Speaker 2>Manny fat big Al, who also does photography, find at

0:21:10.400 --> 0:21:12.520
<v Speaker 2>Alton Windriff dot com.

0:21:13.200 --> 0:21:15.119
<v Speaker 3>Excellent. Thank you, that's a great tip. Thanks.

0:21:15.760 --> 0:21:17.960
<v Speaker 2>So I want to talk about how to save on

0:21:18.080 --> 0:21:20.440
<v Speaker 2>rent and make rent more affordable. And these are tried

0:21:20.480 --> 0:21:23.520
<v Speaker 2>and true tips that I've actually done to lower my rent.

0:21:24.119 --> 0:21:26.280
<v Speaker 2>In fact, I moved into a new place about a

0:21:26.320 --> 0:21:28.440
<v Speaker 2>year and a half ago and I managed to save

0:21:28.640 --> 0:21:31.720
<v Speaker 2>It will be twelve It'll be two four hundred dollars

0:21:31.760 --> 0:21:33.919
<v Speaker 2>once we hit our two year mark because I got

0:21:34.000 --> 0:21:36.280
<v Speaker 2>them to shave one hundred bucks off their asking price

0:21:36.320 --> 0:21:38.760
<v Speaker 2>for the rent, which I was really proud of. And

0:21:38.800 --> 0:21:41.159
<v Speaker 2>again it's just like I said, those little asks. Just

0:21:41.240 --> 0:21:42.880
<v Speaker 2>ask for the little stuff. You never know what they're

0:21:42.880 --> 0:21:45.920
<v Speaker 2>going to say. My first tip to save on rent

0:21:46.040 --> 0:21:49.439
<v Speaker 2>is obviously, don't be afraid to negotiate, especially if you

0:21:49.520 --> 0:21:52.280
<v Speaker 2>know that maybe you're moving to a place where there's

0:21:52.280 --> 0:21:54.120
<v Speaker 2>not as much demand for rental places.

0:21:55.119 --> 0:21:56.080
<v Speaker 3>Ask your landlord.

0:21:56.160 --> 0:21:58.120
<v Speaker 2>You know, let's say you know, for example, your rent

0:21:58.200 --> 0:22:01.600
<v Speaker 2>is sixteen hundred dollars a month, you have excellent credit,

0:22:01.840 --> 0:22:04.960
<v Speaker 2>you have references, you come correct with references, and you're

0:22:05.000 --> 0:22:07.760
<v Speaker 2>ready to show your landlord what a responsible tenant you are.

0:22:08.119 --> 0:22:11.360
<v Speaker 2>If you can show them how responsible you are, then

0:22:11.560 --> 0:22:14.920
<v Speaker 2>ask them for one hundred dollars or ten percent deduction

0:22:15.000 --> 0:22:18.040
<v Speaker 2>in the rent. It can work, but again you have

0:22:18.119 --> 0:22:21.600
<v Speaker 2>to come prepared with those references and with that good credit.

0:22:21.680 --> 0:22:23.760
<v Speaker 4>A tenant of mine did that once. Oh really, yeah,

0:22:23.760 --> 0:22:24.800
<v Speaker 4>she was twenty six years old.

0:22:24.840 --> 0:22:25.160
<v Speaker 1>I remember.

0:22:25.160 --> 0:22:27.840
<v Speaker 4>I was like, I don't know, but because she came

0:22:27.920 --> 0:22:30.159
<v Speaker 4>so prepared with everything, and she actually pre wrote the

0:22:30.240 --> 0:22:32.560
<v Speaker 4>checks a year in advance to me so when she

0:22:32.600 --> 0:22:36.840
<v Speaker 4>asked for less, I was ahead, but she was like, amazing, No,

0:22:36.920 --> 0:22:39.960
<v Speaker 4>But that works because I used to be a landlord

0:22:40.000 --> 0:22:43.080
<v Speaker 4>and her coming so prepared, I was willing to offer

0:22:43.119 --> 0:22:45.080
<v Speaker 4>her less just to have a good tenant in there.

0:22:45.280 --> 0:22:48.920
<v Speaker 2>Offering months in advance rent payments, that's a good tip,

0:22:49.000 --> 0:22:51.280
<v Speaker 2>a good strategy, And I don't know if it's so

0:22:51.320 --> 0:22:53.359
<v Speaker 2>common outside of New York, but a lot of landlords

0:22:53.359 --> 0:22:56.520
<v Speaker 2>asked for first and last month's rent plus security deposit,

0:22:56.600 --> 0:22:59.520
<v Speaker 2>which I know is hard to come up with. But

0:22:59.560 --> 0:23:01.560
<v Speaker 2>if you can, if you can offer to pay two

0:23:01.680 --> 0:23:04.119
<v Speaker 2>or three months, maybe even half a year's rent in

0:23:04.200 --> 0:23:08.320
<v Speaker 2>advance upfront, they'll be willing to shave money off your

0:23:08.320 --> 0:23:09.240
<v Speaker 2>rent if you ask them.

0:23:09.240 --> 0:23:09.679
<v Speaker 3>They might be.

0:23:10.359 --> 0:23:12.560
<v Speaker 2>At the end of the day, a landlord has a

0:23:12.600 --> 0:23:15.200
<v Speaker 2>product that he's trying to sell and he wants someone

0:23:15.200 --> 0:23:17.679
<v Speaker 2>who's going to be living there and be responsible to

0:23:17.720 --> 0:23:19.199
<v Speaker 2>be and not going to move out, you know, and

0:23:19.240 --> 0:23:21.320
<v Speaker 2>break your lease early. And if you show that kind

0:23:21.359 --> 0:23:24.840
<v Speaker 2>of commitment, paying in advance can really help you. Another

0:23:24.880 --> 0:23:27.359
<v Speaker 2>strategy that I've used is picking a good time of

0:23:27.440 --> 0:23:30.600
<v Speaker 2>year to rent. Studies show and my experience shows that

0:23:30.680 --> 0:23:33.760
<v Speaker 2>the winter, winter and early spring are some of the

0:23:33.800 --> 0:23:37.360
<v Speaker 2>more dry seasons, and as a landlord, there's less competition

0:23:37.400 --> 0:23:40.320
<v Speaker 2>out there, which means that they're more desperate to rent

0:23:40.359 --> 0:23:42.880
<v Speaker 2>their place out. And I think that's probably a lot

0:23:42.880 --> 0:23:45.320
<v Speaker 2>of the reason why I was able to negotiate my rent.

0:23:45.359 --> 0:23:47.119
<v Speaker 2>On top of having when was it you good credit?

0:23:47.200 --> 0:23:49.760
<v Speaker 2>I moved in. We were looking for an apartment in February.

0:23:49.800 --> 0:23:52.480
<v Speaker 2>Moved in March first, so it was a great time.

0:23:52.800 --> 0:23:55.560
<v Speaker 2>It's way more difficult to negotiate a rent because there's

0:23:55.560 --> 0:23:58.520
<v Speaker 2>so many people looking for places in May and in September,

0:23:58.880 --> 0:24:02.639
<v Speaker 2>end of college and begin in the school year exactly, definitely,

0:24:02.720 --> 0:24:05.200
<v Speaker 2>So think about your timing and if you can time

0:24:05.240 --> 0:24:07.399
<v Speaker 2>it around winter time. It sucks to move in the cold,

0:24:07.440 --> 0:24:09.640
<v Speaker 2>but money keeps me way.

0:24:09.960 --> 0:24:13.480
<v Speaker 4>I was gonna say that what I'll wear a money jacket,

0:24:13.800 --> 0:24:17.520
<v Speaker 4>And my last tip would be protect your belongings.

0:24:17.560 --> 0:24:20.639
<v Speaker 2>This is like, please eat your vinom, meet your vitamins,

0:24:20.640 --> 0:24:23.440
<v Speaker 2>and like eat your vegetables and stuff. But seriously, Renters

0:24:23.440 --> 0:24:25.760
<v Speaker 2>insurance is no joke. You need to have it. It

0:24:25.800 --> 0:24:28.440
<v Speaker 2>costs like ten to fifteen dollars a month. You can

0:24:28.480 --> 0:24:31.800
<v Speaker 2>easily get a policy. If you have car insurance, call

0:24:31.840 --> 0:24:34.320
<v Speaker 2>your I'm sure your insurance company probably offers a renter's

0:24:34.359 --> 0:24:37.360
<v Speaker 2>insurance policy. You can go through your bank. You can

0:24:37.359 --> 0:24:40.120
<v Speaker 2>go to just random bank and ask them like USAA

0:24:40.160 --> 0:24:43.800
<v Speaker 2>has a great renter's policy and get renter's insurance. Here

0:24:43.960 --> 0:24:46.679
<v Speaker 2>is why if something were to happen to your apartments,

0:24:46.720 --> 0:24:49.439
<v Speaker 2>they a fire, or a flood or the spring. You know,

0:24:49.520 --> 0:24:53.080
<v Speaker 2>someone's bathtub overflows up above, which has happened to people

0:24:53.160 --> 0:24:55.800
<v Speaker 2>before that I know, and it drips down and ruins

0:24:55.800 --> 0:24:58.880
<v Speaker 2>all your furniture. Your landlord is going to definitely pay

0:24:58.920 --> 0:25:01.000
<v Speaker 2>to repair this structure, sure, and to repair the floor

0:25:01.000 --> 0:25:03.119
<v Speaker 2>in the ceiling. But he has or she has no

0:25:03.200 --> 0:25:05.840
<v Speaker 2>obligation to take care of your stuff, which is why

0:25:05.880 --> 0:25:08.080
<v Speaker 2>you have to have renter's insurance. And one of the

0:25:08.160 --> 0:25:10.080
<v Speaker 2>perks of renters insurance is that it won't even it

0:25:10.119 --> 0:25:12.800
<v Speaker 2>won't just cover the stuff in your apartment. If you

0:25:12.880 --> 0:25:15.680
<v Speaker 2>take your laptop computer, you leave it at a friend's

0:25:15.680 --> 0:25:17.920
<v Speaker 2>place or in your car and it gets stolen, really

0:25:17.960 --> 0:25:18.760
<v Speaker 2>it'll still cover it.

0:25:18.800 --> 0:25:21.280
<v Speaker 1>Thatll be awesome. Yeah, And it's not even all that expensive.

0:25:21.359 --> 0:25:23.960
<v Speaker 2>It's literally ten to twelve dollars. You can do estimates online.

0:25:24.000 --> 0:25:25.840
<v Speaker 2>You can go to Traveler's insurance. They have a cool

0:25:25.920 --> 0:25:28.200
<v Speaker 2>tool that you can use. Bank Rate has a cool

0:25:28.240 --> 0:25:30.560
<v Speaker 2>I think retros insurance calculator you can use.

0:25:30.720 --> 0:25:31.840
<v Speaker 3>Just call and get a quote.

0:25:31.960 --> 0:25:33.520
<v Speaker 2>All you have to do is go through your apartments,

0:25:33.520 --> 0:25:35.520
<v Speaker 2>start with your closet and work you through each room

0:25:35.840 --> 0:25:37.920
<v Speaker 2>and get a rough estimate of how much you think.

0:25:37.960 --> 0:25:39.879
<v Speaker 2>Like I think for our place, I have a policy

0:25:39.920 --> 0:25:42.840
<v Speaker 2>for fifteen thousand dollars. Okay, you know, just something that'll

0:25:42.840 --> 0:25:45.080
<v Speaker 2>cover your stuff. Yeah, in the event of an accident.

0:25:46.160 --> 0:25:48.800
<v Speaker 2>Insurance hip excellent return on investment.

0:25:49.080 --> 0:25:50.520
<v Speaker 1>Yes, I like that tip.

0:25:50.960 --> 0:25:53.359
<v Speaker 4>So hopefully if you like our tips, you will let

0:25:53.480 --> 0:25:56.960
<v Speaker 4>us know. Tweet us the BA podcast at the BA

0:25:57.000 --> 0:26:02.760
<v Speaker 4>Podcast at the BA Podcast, Facebook, Brown Ambition and email.

0:26:04.359 --> 0:26:08.760
<v Speaker 1>Podcast at GAI. We should be a singing.

0:26:08.480 --> 0:26:14.199
<v Speaker 4>Great So we are closing out this week's podcast with

0:26:14.400 --> 0:26:15.160
<v Speaker 4>our winds.

0:26:15.440 --> 0:26:17.879
<v Speaker 1>All I do is win, win, win, no matter what.

0:26:18.400 --> 0:26:20.919
<v Speaker 2>But you like that one, right, Gonna save that for

0:26:20.960 --> 0:26:23.320
<v Speaker 2>every every single segment we do of the winds.

0:26:23.400 --> 0:26:26.119
<v Speaker 4>Oh, we should let me practice my notes first, but

0:26:26.160 --> 0:26:30.359
<v Speaker 4>you know what's good? So this wind is near and

0:26:30.400 --> 0:26:32.919
<v Speaker 4>dear to my heart. We talked about baby Limbo. I

0:26:32.960 --> 0:26:35.560
<v Speaker 4>am a first time auntie and we have a little

0:26:35.600 --> 0:26:38.240
<v Speaker 4>boy and a family full of women who are ready

0:26:38.240 --> 0:26:38.719
<v Speaker 4>to spoil.

0:26:38.840 --> 0:26:41.160
<v Speaker 1>She told me, she told me before the baby came.

0:26:41.200 --> 0:26:44.240
<v Speaker 4>You know, I'm not buying anything, right, and true to form,

0:26:44.480 --> 0:26:46.280
<v Speaker 4>she didn't have to, not with four aunties who are

0:26:46.320 --> 0:26:49.600
<v Speaker 4>just doting on this little baby. He's the cutest and

0:26:49.760 --> 0:26:51.960
<v Speaker 4>I love my little peanut, that's my nickname for him.

0:26:52.080 --> 0:26:54.160
<v Speaker 1>And yeah, so that's my win for the week.

0:26:54.520 --> 0:26:57.240
<v Speaker 3>Good for her, Good for you. New babies are great.

0:26:57.320 --> 0:27:02.600
<v Speaker 2>Yes, if you're ready for that, yes, Okay, my win

0:27:02.680 --> 0:27:05.800
<v Speaker 2>of the week. I need to call out a I

0:27:05.800 --> 0:27:08.439
<v Speaker 2>would say this associate to mine. We went to college together,

0:27:08.520 --> 0:27:10.280
<v Speaker 2>and you know how you go to school with someone

0:27:10.400 --> 0:27:11.879
<v Speaker 2>you know them well, and then you leave school and

0:27:11.920 --> 0:27:13.560
<v Speaker 2>then you kind of drift apart and you go do

0:27:13.640 --> 0:27:16.240
<v Speaker 2>your own thing, and but you still follow each other

0:27:16.320 --> 0:27:18.720
<v Speaker 2>on social media. Like I still kind of social media

0:27:18.760 --> 0:27:21.320
<v Speaker 2>stock her, and I've been following her career and I'm

0:27:21.320 --> 0:27:24.800
<v Speaker 2>really proud of her. I think she's doing our school proud.

0:27:25.320 --> 0:27:27.840
<v Speaker 2>Her name is Macy Peterson, and she has this app

0:27:27.880 --> 0:27:31.640
<v Speaker 2>which is pretty genius. It's called on Second Thought. It's

0:27:31.680 --> 0:27:34.040
<v Speaker 2>for Android users, and this is going.

0:27:34.040 --> 0:27:34.640
<v Speaker 3>To solve one.

0:27:34.800 --> 0:27:36.679
<v Speaker 2>It pretty much solves the problem all of us have

0:27:36.720 --> 0:27:39.240
<v Speaker 2>faith with our texting. It allows you to take back

0:27:39.280 --> 0:27:42.320
<v Speaker 2>a text. Really yeah, not take it back in the

0:27:42.320 --> 0:27:43.920
<v Speaker 2>sense that you send it and you can get it back.

0:27:43.920 --> 0:27:45.640
<v Speaker 2>But I think how it works is that you send

0:27:45.680 --> 0:27:47.280
<v Speaker 2>a text through the app and then you have like

0:27:47.320 --> 0:27:49.679
<v Speaker 2>an hour delay or a twenty four hour delay, like

0:27:49.720 --> 0:27:52.359
<v Speaker 2>if you think you might regret sending it in the morning. Okay,

0:27:52.440 --> 0:27:54.480
<v Speaker 2>let's say you had a couple glasses of wine. You're

0:27:54.520 --> 0:27:56.880
<v Speaker 2>not toasted, but like you're just needing anything. Maybe I'll

0:27:56.920 --> 0:27:58.560
<v Speaker 2>send it to a second and have like a five

0:27:58.560 --> 0:28:02.520
<v Speaker 2>second delay. Nice. Nice, and you feel like you feel

0:28:02.560 --> 0:28:04.199
<v Speaker 2>some kind of way about what your mom said to

0:28:04.200 --> 0:28:06.080
<v Speaker 2>you about you know, your hair last week, and you

0:28:06.080 --> 0:28:07.440
<v Speaker 2>want to let her know how you feel. You can

0:28:07.480 --> 0:28:09.840
<v Speaker 2>send it you on second on second thought the app

0:28:10.200 --> 0:28:12.879
<v Speaker 2>and have a day or an hour delay before the

0:28:12.920 --> 0:28:16.800
<v Speaker 2>app the text actually gets sent. Okay, pretty smart idea

0:28:16.800 --> 0:28:20.240
<v Speaker 2>is So she presented this at I think it started

0:28:20.240 --> 0:28:22.840
<v Speaker 2>at south By Southwest last year, and in just a

0:28:22.960 --> 0:28:26.880
<v Speaker 2>year's time she's raised hundreds of thousands of dollars and

0:28:26.960 --> 0:28:30.159
<v Speaker 2>she's moving the app and her startup from DC to

0:28:30.320 --> 0:28:33.600
<v Speaker 2>Silicon Valley. She's like living the entrepreneur's dream. She's a

0:28:33.600 --> 0:28:35.800
<v Speaker 2>brown girl, and she's a brown girl in tech, which

0:28:35.840 --> 0:28:38.960
<v Speaker 2>is so rare and so necessary, and it's awesome to

0:28:38.960 --> 0:28:40.120
<v Speaker 2>see her doing so well.

0:28:40.160 --> 0:28:41.800
<v Speaker 3>So I just want to give Macy a shout out.

0:28:41.880 --> 0:28:44.600
<v Speaker 1>Yes, Macey Virtual Color. Yeah right, maybe.

0:28:44.480 --> 0:28:45.840
<v Speaker 3>I'll stop just stalking her, let her know.

0:28:45.800 --> 0:28:47.880
<v Speaker 1>How I really feel. No, that's awesome, Macy.

0:28:48.480 --> 0:28:50.160
<v Speaker 2>We should have her on Monday. I'm sure she has

0:28:50.200 --> 0:28:51.040
<v Speaker 2>lots of tips to share.

0:28:51.160 --> 0:28:54.040
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, I'd love to hear that. So hope you enjoyed

0:28:54.080 --> 0:28:56.800
<v Speaker 4>this week. Show Me and Mandy enjoyed being here with you.

0:28:57.040 --> 0:28:59.200
<v Speaker 4>If you'd like to find us, where can they find us?

0:28:59.280 --> 0:29:01.800
<v Speaker 2>You can find us on Twitter at the BA podcast,

0:29:02.320 --> 0:29:07.920
<v Speaker 2>on Facebook at Brown Ambition, or please send us emails, compliments, complaints,

0:29:08.320 --> 0:29:10.760
<v Speaker 2>send us your wins of the weeks, your brown breaks.

0:29:10.800 --> 0:29:15.160
<v Speaker 2>So email us at Brown Ambition Podcast at gmail dot com.

0:29:15.280 --> 0:29:27.120
<v Speaker 1>See you soon, and we're back and browner.

0:29:27.840 --> 0:29:31.800
<v Speaker 4>We have the amazing, the beautiful, the intelligent, and the

0:29:31.880 --> 0:29:33.440
<v Speaker 4>real doctor Emiani.

0:29:36.440 --> 0:29:41.240
<v Speaker 3>Okay, now I like that hire everybody and hire to

0:29:41.240 --> 0:29:43.440
<v Speaker 3>you guys. I like that, though, Yes, it is browner

0:29:44.160 --> 0:29:49.560
<v Speaker 3>just because I'm here, uh so, so yeah, I'm totally

0:29:49.680 --> 0:29:52.720
<v Speaker 3>like I'm so highed to like meet you guys virtually

0:29:52.800 --> 0:29:56.680
<v Speaker 3>because new normal. But yeah, like this is this is great.

0:29:56.720 --> 0:29:57.920
<v Speaker 3>I'm super happy to be here.

0:29:58.720 --> 0:30:02.360
<v Speaker 2>So doctormani, you have been a practicing psychiatrist for how long?

0:30:02.400 --> 0:30:06.320
<v Speaker 3>Now, let's see my I'm like looking at one of

0:30:06.360 --> 0:30:08.920
<v Speaker 3>my degrees on the wall in my office. Yeah, okay,

0:30:09.680 --> 0:30:12.800
<v Speaker 3>that's all right. Sorry, yeah, like that really wasn't a flex.

0:30:12.840 --> 0:30:15.280
<v Speaker 3>But I realize now it sounds like one of my degrees,

0:30:15.320 --> 0:30:17.440
<v Speaker 3>one of my four things on.

0:30:17.400 --> 0:30:20.760
<v Speaker 2>The wall, you pay for them. Let's let's respect. Well, okay,

0:30:20.800 --> 0:30:21.160
<v Speaker 2>I will.

0:30:21.200 --> 0:30:26.240
<v Speaker 3>I will admit, like, honestly, I didn't pay for them.

0:30:26.280 --> 0:30:30.640
<v Speaker 3>My parents did, right, So so I actually spoke about

0:30:30.640 --> 0:30:33.000
<v Speaker 3>my mom. I spoke to my mom about this because

0:30:33.000 --> 0:30:36.840
<v Speaker 3>we have a YouTube show actually that we usually do

0:30:36.920 --> 0:30:38.600
<v Speaker 3>it every Monday, so I have to do that in

0:30:38.640 --> 0:30:44.959
<v Speaker 3>a couple hours. But I never let anyone know in

0:30:45.080 --> 0:30:48.920
<v Speaker 3>school that I didn't receive financial aid or that I

0:30:48.960 --> 0:30:52.600
<v Speaker 3>had a scholarship. So I would always memorize where the

0:30:52.600 --> 0:30:56.680
<v Speaker 3>financial aid office was because at the end of the year,

0:30:57.200 --> 0:30:59.719
<v Speaker 3>apparently you have to do like your financial aid wrap up,

0:30:59.760 --> 0:31:02.840
<v Speaker 3>and I don't know anything about like I've heard of

0:31:02.920 --> 0:31:05.760
<v Speaker 3>loans like stafford loans and stuff, but that didn't apply

0:31:05.840 --> 0:31:08.240
<v Speaker 3>to me, so I would just memorize where the financial

0:31:08.240 --> 0:31:10.160
<v Speaker 3>aid office was because I didn't want people to know,

0:31:10.800 --> 0:31:14.240
<v Speaker 3>you know that my basically my parents saved up for it.

0:31:14.280 --> 0:31:17.720
<v Speaker 3>And I did have a scholarship. My alma maters is

0:31:18.120 --> 0:31:23.400
<v Speaker 3>Xavier University in New Orleans, and I had an academic scholarship. Yes, yes,

0:31:24.640 --> 0:31:28.800
<v Speaker 3>but yeah, I never My mother told me when I

0:31:28.880 --> 0:31:30.800
<v Speaker 3>was a senior in high school. She was like, well,

0:31:31.360 --> 0:31:32.760
<v Speaker 3>you know, if you want to go to a school

0:31:32.800 --> 0:31:35.920
<v Speaker 3>in the Northeast, and I'd gotten into like Wesleyan and Vassar,

0:31:35.960 --> 0:31:38.400
<v Speaker 3>which is my mom's alma mater, she was like, you

0:31:38.440 --> 0:31:41.600
<v Speaker 3>can do that. But she like she was really really

0:31:41.640 --> 0:31:44.440
<v Speaker 3>adamant about me going to Xavier because I wanted to

0:31:44.440 --> 0:31:47.560
<v Speaker 3>be a doctor and it's basically a black doctor factory

0:31:47.600 --> 0:31:49.960
<v Speaker 3>and has been for decades. So she was like, here's

0:31:49.960 --> 0:31:53.800
<v Speaker 3>the thing. We can pay for your college because it's

0:31:53.840 --> 0:31:57.120
<v Speaker 3>significantly cheaper, like it was much much cheaper than Northeast

0:31:58.000 --> 0:32:00.360
<v Speaker 3>like Ivy League suition. She was like, I can pay

0:32:00.360 --> 0:32:02.880
<v Speaker 3>for you college. You can get a car, you know, basically,

0:32:02.880 --> 0:32:05.880
<v Speaker 3>like you can be out here. But when but if

0:32:05.920 --> 0:32:07.960
<v Speaker 3>you go to a school in the Northeast, You're gonna

0:32:08.000 --> 0:32:09.600
<v Speaker 3>have to take out loans. And I was like, well

0:32:09.640 --> 0:32:13.240
<v Speaker 3>then no, I was like, I'm not doing that, so

0:32:14.040 --> 0:32:17.480
<v Speaker 3>my my. So basically that's what happened. So when I

0:32:17.520 --> 0:32:19.960
<v Speaker 3>would be at a college, like I said, at Xavier,

0:32:20.000 --> 0:32:22.760
<v Speaker 3>and then when I was in med school, I knew,

0:32:22.800 --> 0:32:25.200
<v Speaker 3>I mean, the majority of people that I knew who

0:32:25.280 --> 0:32:28.000
<v Speaker 3>were my med school class were on scholarship or you know,

0:32:28.120 --> 0:32:31.360
<v Speaker 3>received financial aid. But and I knew where the office was,

0:32:31.440 --> 0:32:33.080
<v Speaker 3>I knew the building, but I had just never been

0:32:33.120 --> 0:32:34.680
<v Speaker 3>in the office because it didn't apply to me.

0:32:35.440 --> 0:32:36.320
<v Speaker 1>So it's amazing.

0:32:36.400 --> 0:32:37.320
<v Speaker 3>I love that story.

0:32:37.680 --> 0:32:40.160
<v Speaker 2>And also how odd that you were ashamed of something

0:32:40.160 --> 0:32:41.040
<v Speaker 2>that was so amazing.

0:32:41.600 --> 0:32:45.360
<v Speaker 3>Yes, it was. I mean honestly, it wasn't that I

0:32:45.520 --> 0:32:50.080
<v Speaker 3>was fearful of anyone shaming me, and I wasn't. I

0:32:50.160 --> 0:32:53.840
<v Speaker 3>wasn't ashamed of having like my friends, know, like the

0:32:53.880 --> 0:32:56.480
<v Speaker 3>brown and black, you know friends that I had. It

0:32:56.600 --> 0:32:58.400
<v Speaker 3>was more so like I was like, I don't want

0:32:58.400 --> 0:33:01.080
<v Speaker 3>these white people to know because then like it's like,

0:33:01.160 --> 0:33:04.240
<v Speaker 3>oh so, because the assumption is you're on financial aid

0:33:04.600 --> 0:33:07.400
<v Speaker 3>when we all know that white women benefit the most

0:33:07.440 --> 0:33:11.239
<v Speaker 3>from you know, affirmative action, and in those types of scholarships, right,

0:33:11.280 --> 0:33:14.040
<v Speaker 3>or those types of situations. I just didn't want to

0:33:14.120 --> 0:33:18.760
<v Speaker 3>have the conversation of like, Okay, you know, my parents

0:33:18.880 --> 0:33:22.720
<v Speaker 3>are very they're they're very what's the word I'm looking for.

0:33:22.960 --> 0:33:26.080
<v Speaker 3>They're very austere. And that's what they taught me, and

0:33:26.120 --> 0:33:28.080
<v Speaker 3>that's what they taught like, you know, my cousins and

0:33:28.120 --> 0:33:31.160
<v Speaker 3>everybody else in my family. So I always saw money

0:33:31.160 --> 0:33:33.680
<v Speaker 3>as a tool and not something to just be spent.

0:33:34.360 --> 0:33:37.280
<v Speaker 3>And I guess I didn't want anybody to think that, like, oh,

0:33:37.320 --> 0:33:40.120
<v Speaker 3>so you think you're all that. So I actually I

0:33:40.160 --> 0:33:44.160
<v Speaker 3>haven't admitted this to anybody outside of my circle of friends.

0:33:44.200 --> 0:33:47.120
<v Speaker 3>I don't think until like this year, because I just didn't.

0:33:47.160 --> 0:33:48.960
<v Speaker 3>I just didn't want. I just didn't want people to know.

0:33:49.000 --> 0:33:51.520
<v Speaker 3>I'm like, if that's my personal business. And then also

0:33:51.760 --> 0:33:53.440
<v Speaker 3>the way I grew up, it was like, you know,

0:33:54.000 --> 0:33:58.520
<v Speaker 3>you keep your financial business to yourself. So we always

0:33:58.880 --> 0:34:02.000
<v Speaker 3>I guess, I mean, like we were solidly middle class.

0:34:02.040 --> 0:34:04.920
<v Speaker 3>Then we became middle upper class, but we still you know,

0:34:05.080 --> 0:34:08.359
<v Speaker 3>went to Sam's Club, went to Costco. Like my mom

0:34:08.400 --> 0:34:11.600
<v Speaker 3>grew up on welfare. My dad wasn't on welfare, but

0:34:11.680 --> 0:34:14.560
<v Speaker 3>he he you know, just had two hard working parents

0:34:14.600 --> 0:34:16.879
<v Speaker 3>that weren't getting a lot of money in the Jim

0:34:16.920 --> 0:34:20.000
<v Speaker 3>Crow South. So I was just taught to you know,

0:34:20.160 --> 0:34:22.640
<v Speaker 3>like yes, money but like it you know, it ain't

0:34:22.680 --> 0:34:25.320
<v Speaker 3>for you like you, Oh you want outfit, that's that's cute,

0:34:25.360 --> 0:34:27.239
<v Speaker 3>Go get a job. So I've been working since I

0:34:27.280 --> 0:34:29.880
<v Speaker 3>was fourteen ever since you could have get your working

0:34:29.880 --> 0:34:30.640
<v Speaker 3>papers in New York.

0:34:30.760 --> 0:34:31.600
<v Speaker 1>Yes, I remember that.

0:34:31.680 --> 0:34:34.040
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, work, go to the high school and get your

0:34:34.040 --> 0:34:35.640
<v Speaker 4>market papers working this summer.

0:34:35.800 --> 0:34:38.200
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, I used. I went to this. There was a school.

0:34:38.239 --> 0:34:40.279
<v Speaker 3>I went to Calhoun on eighty first in West and

0:34:40.440 --> 0:34:43.120
<v Speaker 3>Manhattan and there was like a I don't know if

0:34:43.160 --> 0:34:45.240
<v Speaker 3>it was like a special needs school or something similar.

0:34:45.280 --> 0:34:47.839
<v Speaker 3>It was like a block away. And I remember when

0:34:47.840 --> 0:34:49.600
<v Speaker 3>I was fourteen, I went over there and got my

0:34:49.640 --> 0:34:52.440
<v Speaker 3>working papers. And I've been working. So if I'm forty

0:34:52.480 --> 0:34:56.839
<v Speaker 3>four now, I've been working for thirty years. Wow. Yeah.

0:34:56.920 --> 0:34:59.839
<v Speaker 3>So anyway, I'm sorry how to answer your question because

0:34:59.840 --> 0:35:03.760
<v Speaker 3>I just did I even ask a question this story.

0:35:04.560 --> 0:35:08.319
<v Speaker 3>I have so many follow ups I have, like I

0:35:08.320 --> 0:35:10.160
<v Speaker 3>can go on Tannis, so just like you know, be

0:35:10.239 --> 0:35:11.440
<v Speaker 3>like Emani okay, tap.

0:35:11.280 --> 0:35:13.360
<v Speaker 2>Out you do from your own podcast? Can we just

0:35:13.360 --> 0:35:14.640
<v Speaker 2>say Imani's state of Mind.

0:35:15.200 --> 0:35:16.759
<v Speaker 3>Check it out. I love it.

0:35:16.800 --> 0:35:19.800
<v Speaker 2>I listened to the one of the most recent episodes yesterday.

0:35:20.080 --> 0:35:27.239
<v Speaker 2>Oh nice, nice, iocast on today. It's super fun. I've

0:35:27.239 --> 0:35:30.200
<v Speaker 2>been So I've been a practicing physician since two thousand

0:35:30.239 --> 0:35:30.640
<v Speaker 2>and nine.

0:35:30.719 --> 0:35:32.200
<v Speaker 3>That's all right, that was my question.

0:35:33.920 --> 0:35:37.120
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, but no, I love it.

0:35:37.160 --> 0:35:40.080
<v Speaker 3>No ten years. Wait, two thousand and five, so fifteen years, No,

0:35:40.160 --> 0:35:42.719
<v Speaker 3>two thousand and nine. So two thousand and nine, I've

0:35:42.719 --> 0:35:46.800
<v Speaker 3>finished my fellowship in forensic psychiatry. So since then pretty

0:35:46.880 --> 0:35:50.480
<v Speaker 3>much I've been treating psychiatric patients.

0:35:50.640 --> 0:35:52.960
<v Speaker 2>So you are well, so business must be booming.

0:35:54.360 --> 0:35:58.239
<v Speaker 3>Yes, business is booming, I would say. I mean, like

0:35:58.360 --> 0:36:02.200
<v Speaker 3>straight up, when this when all this happened, like I

0:36:02.440 --> 0:36:05.080
<v Speaker 3>freaked out like everybody else, because it was basically it

0:36:05.160 --> 0:36:07.680
<v Speaker 3>was like Friday, and I'm out here in LA so

0:36:07.719 --> 0:36:09.480
<v Speaker 3>it was like I think it was March thirteenth or

0:36:09.480 --> 0:36:12.879
<v Speaker 3>something like that. Friday, it was like, okay, so we're

0:36:12.920 --> 0:36:15.920
<v Speaker 3>probably gonna be on quarantine and I was like, okay, well,

0:36:15.960 --> 0:36:17.799
<v Speaker 3>I don't really know what that means, like as it

0:36:17.800 --> 0:36:21.680
<v Speaker 3>pertains to me. And then Monday we were all on lockdown,

0:36:21.680 --> 0:36:23.560
<v Speaker 3>and I was like, oh my god, like, do I

0:36:23.600 --> 0:36:26.239
<v Speaker 3>have a job, Stille, what am I gonna do? So

0:36:26.440 --> 0:36:31.440
<v Speaker 3>I've pretty much been exclusively seeing patients via telehealth, so

0:36:31.560 --> 0:36:36.440
<v Speaker 3>either by video conferencing or by the via telephone. And

0:36:36.640 --> 0:36:41.319
<v Speaker 3>is business booming? Yes? I work at a hospital. I

0:36:41.360 --> 0:36:44.640
<v Speaker 3>am the medical director and also the chief medical officer

0:36:44.760 --> 0:36:47.440
<v Speaker 3>at a mental health hospital out here in Los Angeles

0:36:47.640 --> 0:36:51.360
<v Speaker 3>called Gateways Hospital. And the patients that I see, because

0:36:51.400 --> 0:36:54.839
<v Speaker 3>I have a forensic psychiatry background, these are patients who

0:36:54.920 --> 0:36:57.960
<v Speaker 3>came from jail or came from the state mental hospital.

0:36:58.040 --> 0:37:01.840
<v Speaker 3>They might have committed some really like really egregious crimes,

0:37:02.320 --> 0:37:04.680
<v Speaker 3>but it was due to their symptoms from mental illness.

0:37:04.680 --> 0:37:07.280
<v Speaker 3>So I basically get them stable and keep them stable.

0:37:08.000 --> 0:37:12.439
<v Speaker 3>So it hasn't it hasn't necessarily increased for me. It's

0:37:12.520 --> 0:37:15.120
<v Speaker 3>it just I had to change the mode with I

0:37:15.160 --> 0:37:16.680
<v Speaker 3>had to change the mode of how I was seeing

0:37:16.719 --> 0:37:19.560
<v Speaker 3>my patients, which honestly, I really I really like being

0:37:19.600 --> 0:37:21.879
<v Speaker 3>at home. Honestly. I mean, I think we've both talked

0:37:21.880 --> 0:37:23.000
<v Speaker 3>about how we were introverts.

0:37:23.520 --> 0:37:23.920
<v Speaker 2>Mm hmm.

0:37:24.760 --> 0:37:25.000
<v Speaker 3>Yeah.

0:37:25.080 --> 0:37:29.560
<v Speaker 2>The intersection between mental health and what's happening right now,

0:37:29.600 --> 0:37:32.480
<v Speaker 2>I mean, everything happening in the world is just a lot,

0:37:32.880 --> 0:37:34.760
<v Speaker 2>right now, and I feel like it is the exact

0:37:34.840 --> 0:37:36.719
<v Speaker 2>right moment to have you on because we're like five

0:37:36.800 --> 0:37:38.960
<v Speaker 2>or six months into this thing, and I was telling Tiffl, like,

0:37:39.320 --> 0:37:41.560
<v Speaker 2>we really haven't taken a step back to pause and

0:37:42.080 --> 0:37:44.160
<v Speaker 2>examine sort of how has this affected us all?

0:37:44.239 --> 0:37:45.680
<v Speaker 3>So, I mean, what would you say.

0:37:45.719 --> 0:37:48.440
<v Speaker 2>I know that your you know your patients have like

0:37:48.480 --> 0:37:51.880
<v Speaker 2>you were saying, you know, severe mental illness, But what

0:37:51.920 --> 0:37:54.000
<v Speaker 2>are sort of like, can you break down, like mentally

0:37:54.080 --> 0:37:57.000
<v Speaker 2>sort of what it is, what's happening to us, what's

0:37:57.040 --> 0:37:57.600
<v Speaker 2>going on?

0:37:57.760 --> 0:37:58.000
<v Speaker 3>Why?

0:37:58.080 --> 0:38:01.160
<v Speaker 2>Why anxiety is up? It feels like people who had

0:38:01.200 --> 0:38:04.160
<v Speaker 2>maybe low grade depression before probably more prone to having

0:38:04.200 --> 0:38:06.880
<v Speaker 2>it pop up now. I mean, like, tif, how's it

0:38:06.920 --> 0:38:09.399
<v Speaker 2>been for you? Like, I feel like we just need

0:38:09.440 --> 0:38:11.560
<v Speaker 2>someone to explain to us what's happening and how we

0:38:11.600 --> 0:38:14.040
<v Speaker 2>can like cope, Yes.

0:38:13.920 --> 0:38:14.479
<v Speaker 1>It's been.

0:38:16.960 --> 0:38:18.759
<v Speaker 4>There were especially in the beginning. At first I was like,

0:38:18.760 --> 0:38:21.000
<v Speaker 4>I'm good, I'm good, I'm good. I'm not good, you know,

0:38:21.320 --> 0:38:23.359
<v Speaker 4>And then so there's just been this wave of good

0:38:23.440 --> 0:38:25.799
<v Speaker 4>not good, good not good. And I remember last night

0:38:25.880 --> 0:38:29.120
<v Speaker 4>I was scrolling through social and I literally had to

0:38:29.200 --> 0:38:31.640
<v Speaker 4>say no. My husband wanted to show me one of

0:38:31.640 --> 0:38:33.680
<v Speaker 4>those videos we all know what I mean, what we

0:38:33.719 --> 0:38:36.640
<v Speaker 4>mean by like, you know, black dead, black beaten bodies.

0:38:36.640 --> 0:38:40.120
<v Speaker 4>And I said, honestly, babe, I refuse, I refuse. I'm

0:38:40.120 --> 0:38:41.880
<v Speaker 4>not looking at any more of those videos.

0:38:41.920 --> 0:38:42.239
<v Speaker 3>I'm not.

0:38:42.719 --> 0:38:46.560
<v Speaker 4>It's too much, it's too much, And yeah, that's how

0:38:46.600 --> 0:38:49.719
<v Speaker 4>I'm feeling that, I'm feeling that, I'm feeling in a

0:38:49.719 --> 0:38:52.480
<v Speaker 4>place where I feel like I'm striving hard to protect

0:38:52.480 --> 0:38:54.479
<v Speaker 4>my peace because it's just all too much.

0:38:56.040 --> 0:38:56.360
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I.

0:38:58.120 --> 0:39:03.160
<v Speaker 3>Have always known that, Like I'm not good with seeing

0:39:03.360 --> 0:39:07.960
<v Speaker 3>people in the act of being hurt or being tortured, Like, don't.

0:39:08.000 --> 0:39:11.720
<v Speaker 3>I don't want to invite that into my Space'm loud.

0:39:11.760 --> 0:39:14.480
<v Speaker 3>I'm fine with, you know, picking up the pieces and

0:39:14.520 --> 0:39:18.400
<v Speaker 3>helping someone after the fact. But for me, all I

0:39:18.440 --> 0:39:20.879
<v Speaker 3>need to know is like, okay, so tell me what happened. Okay, great,

0:39:20.920 --> 0:39:22.560
<v Speaker 3>those are the facts, all right, now, how do we

0:39:22.600 --> 0:39:27.240
<v Speaker 3>get it better? I haven't watched one video, probably since

0:39:27.800 --> 0:39:30.120
<v Speaker 3>I'm not even lying, probably since Rodney King. I'm like,

0:39:30.120 --> 0:39:32.560
<v Speaker 3>I'm not watching this shit, like I'm not. I don't

0:39:32.640 --> 0:39:35.440
<v Speaker 3>need to invite that into my space. So, you know,

0:39:35.520 --> 0:39:38.560
<v Speaker 3>I'll look at the news, like not look at it,

0:39:38.600 --> 0:39:40.600
<v Speaker 3>but I'll read the news from my news app on

0:39:40.640 --> 0:39:44.480
<v Speaker 3>my phone for like fifteen minutes and a day and

0:39:44.520 --> 0:39:47.560
<v Speaker 3>then that's it because everything else is like speculative and

0:39:47.600 --> 0:39:51.120
<v Speaker 3>conjecture and things that you know. I don't know if

0:39:51.160 --> 0:39:53.920
<v Speaker 3>you guys have been noticing this, but like the news

0:39:54.000 --> 0:39:59.040
<v Speaker 3>that bubbles up through the COVID cracks, if you will,

0:39:59.600 --> 0:40:02.279
<v Speaker 3>is some wild shit.

0:40:02.920 --> 0:40:06.160
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, because it has to take away the headlines from

0:40:06.160 --> 0:40:08.040
<v Speaker 2>COVID's wild.

0:40:07.800 --> 0:40:11.279
<v Speaker 3>I saw us like apparently there's like I mean, it's summertime,

0:40:11.360 --> 0:40:15.600
<v Speaker 3>but you know, kids in cars overheating and dying and

0:40:16.040 --> 0:40:18.640
<v Speaker 3>some there was some woman who like kills her grandparents.

0:40:18.640 --> 0:40:22.200
<v Speaker 3>Like it's just it's so much weird ness that's going on.

0:40:22.440 --> 0:40:26.440
<v Speaker 3>So I purposefully don't like if there's a video, I'm like,

0:40:26.440 --> 0:40:29.080
<v Speaker 3>I'm watching that, like I'm not trying.

0:40:29.280 --> 0:40:33.280
<v Speaker 2>It's not just that pandemic. It's also it's this reckoning

0:40:33.320 --> 0:40:37.120
<v Speaker 2>we're happening. We're happening, Yeah, I can talk. We're having

0:40:37.719 --> 0:40:40.600
<v Speaker 2>with the reality of what it's like to be black

0:40:40.640 --> 0:40:43.360
<v Speaker 2>in America, black and brown in America, and that is

0:40:43.360 --> 0:40:45.839
<v Speaker 2>happening at the same time where like everyone's lives are

0:40:45.880 --> 0:40:48.640
<v Speaker 2>at risk and the world's on fire and the pandemic's happening.

0:40:49.120 --> 0:40:51.200
<v Speaker 2>I mean, so you mentioned killer Locus.

0:40:51.239 --> 0:40:53.840
<v Speaker 3>I'm just kidding. There's no killer Locus. There's killer wasps

0:40:53.960 --> 0:40:54.879
<v Speaker 3>or something, right, Like.

0:40:55.760 --> 0:40:57.560
<v Speaker 1>There's aliens on Venus today, I was.

0:40:57.640 --> 0:41:00.360
<v Speaker 2>There's aliens on Venus. Can we join them? They like,

0:41:00.760 --> 0:41:03.759
<v Speaker 2>you know, you know, can I apply for admission?

0:41:03.800 --> 0:41:04.239
<v Speaker 1>I don't know.

0:41:04.800 --> 0:41:07.400
<v Speaker 3>I saw that, but I was like, and this is

0:41:07.440 --> 0:41:10.240
<v Speaker 3>the nerd in me. I'm like, is that possible? Because

0:41:10.760 --> 0:41:15.839
<v Speaker 3>I think Venus is like a gaseous planet. But whatever, whatever, again,

0:41:15.920 --> 0:41:18.400
<v Speaker 3>let's not even focus on that because I'm super nerd.

0:41:18.920 --> 0:41:19.640
<v Speaker 3>I'll nerd out.

0:41:19.920 --> 0:41:22.600
<v Speaker 2>So let's my knowledge of Venus is like sailor Moon

0:41:22.640 --> 0:41:26.200
<v Speaker 2>from you know, high school. That's where as it goes.

0:41:26.600 --> 0:41:29.200
<v Speaker 2>But so okay, But but fifteen minutes so limiting news.

0:41:29.239 --> 0:41:31.279
<v Speaker 2>I think that's something that I need to do that

0:41:31.400 --> 0:41:34.960
<v Speaker 2>because I am obsessed with telling my Google. Like I'm like, hey, Google,

0:41:35.040 --> 0:41:37.120
<v Speaker 2>tell me the news just whenever I have downtime or

0:41:37.160 --> 0:41:39.120
<v Speaker 2>I'm cooking or like walking the dog.

0:41:39.560 --> 0:41:42.160
<v Speaker 3>I just ime kind of obsessed with listening tones.

0:41:42.160 --> 0:41:45.600
<v Speaker 2>But you're right, like it doesn't really change, but something

0:41:45.640 --> 0:41:47.640
<v Speaker 2>about that has become like a tick for me to

0:41:47.760 --> 0:41:50.680
<v Speaker 2>want to consume it just to see if something new

0:41:50.719 --> 0:41:52.759
<v Speaker 2>has happened, or if there's new information.

0:41:53.760 --> 0:41:57.359
<v Speaker 3>There's something I was told last week I was doing this.

0:41:58.560 --> 0:42:02.399
<v Speaker 3>I was being recorded for this document about millennials and

0:42:03.000 --> 0:42:06.400
<v Speaker 3>mental health, and my topic was anxiety. And there was

0:42:06.480 --> 0:42:09.279
<v Speaker 3>an interesting term the producer used, which was what do

0:42:09.360 --> 0:42:14.040
<v Speaker 3>you call it? Doom scrolling? And I was like, I

0:42:14.120 --> 0:42:17.680
<v Speaker 3>was like, what's doing scy app? But it sounded like,

0:42:17.840 --> 0:42:19.880
<v Speaker 3>I mean again, I'm a nerd. It sounded I was like,

0:42:19.960 --> 0:42:22.000
<v Speaker 3>is that like Ninja scroll? Like the anime movie from

0:42:22.000 --> 0:42:24.600
<v Speaker 3>back in the day. He was like, Now, I was like, okay, sorry,

0:42:25.160 --> 0:42:28.160
<v Speaker 3>but it was but he so who What he explained

0:42:28.320 --> 0:42:32.160
<v Speaker 3>was doom scrolling is the act of basically like what

0:42:32.200 --> 0:42:34.680
<v Speaker 3>you what you explained, like you're in your in your

0:42:34.719 --> 0:42:38.520
<v Speaker 3>news app, or you know, you ask you your nearest AI,

0:42:39.480 --> 0:42:42.880
<v Speaker 3>you know, machine, alexis, Siri, whoever, like, oh, tell me

0:42:42.920 --> 0:42:46.200
<v Speaker 3>the news because it's it's everything is so out of

0:42:46.239 --> 0:42:50.680
<v Speaker 3>our control, and just being able to at least, you know,

0:42:51.040 --> 0:42:54.399
<v Speaker 3>ask and ask your phone or ask your device, hey,

0:42:54.800 --> 0:42:57.520
<v Speaker 3>can you tell me the news is somehow comforting because

0:42:57.520 --> 0:43:00.399
<v Speaker 3>it's something we can control. But then when we start

0:43:00.440 --> 0:43:03.480
<v Speaker 3>to actually read or it's we're told the news, we

0:43:03.520 --> 0:43:08.720
<v Speaker 3>consume the news. We are trying to gain more control

0:43:08.800 --> 0:43:11.920
<v Speaker 3>of our lives. But the problem is that, like I

0:43:11.960 --> 0:43:14.520
<v Speaker 3>said before, there are certain things that are factual in

0:43:14.520 --> 0:43:15.560
<v Speaker 3>the news. There are a lot of things in the

0:43:15.560 --> 0:43:18.080
<v Speaker 3>news that are factual, but there's a lot that there's

0:43:18.080 --> 0:43:20.000
<v Speaker 3>a lot of a lot of news stories that are

0:43:20.080 --> 0:43:24.279
<v Speaker 3>very speculative, like we think Biden might win, Oh, but

0:43:24.360 --> 0:43:27.040
<v Speaker 3>we think Trump might win. We might think that, and

0:43:27.120 --> 0:43:29.640
<v Speaker 3>it's and it's it's not doing us any good. I

0:43:29.760 --> 0:43:32.960
<v Speaker 3>understand that these news outlets need content, but it's not

0:43:33.080 --> 0:43:38.040
<v Speaker 3>doing us the public, any favors because it's just creating

0:43:38.120 --> 0:43:43.080
<v Speaker 3>this this creating this mood of like I don't give

0:43:43.080 --> 0:43:45.920
<v Speaker 3>a fuck, but then I'm mad anxious all the time.

0:43:46.920 --> 0:43:49.839
<v Speaker 3>It's like, you know, it's like, well, I'm anxious because

0:43:49.840 --> 0:43:51.319
<v Speaker 3>I don't know what's going to happen day to day.

0:43:51.320 --> 0:43:52.840
<v Speaker 3>But then at the same time, it's like, well, okay,

0:43:52.840 --> 0:43:54.319
<v Speaker 3>well what do you want to do? Like I don't

0:43:54.360 --> 0:43:56.280
<v Speaker 3>know what can I do? Like I can't go outside,

0:43:56.440 --> 0:43:58.440
<v Speaker 3>I can't go do hood rashit with my friends. I

0:43:58.480 --> 0:44:01.440
<v Speaker 3>can't like you know, like like I can't like I

0:44:01.480 --> 0:44:05.080
<v Speaker 3>can't like be me so to answer your question from

0:44:05.080 --> 0:44:08.680
<v Speaker 3>like five minutes ago, my bad. I think what's been

0:44:08.719 --> 0:44:12.359
<v Speaker 3>happening as far as let's you know, let's use doom

0:44:12.400 --> 0:44:14.720
<v Speaker 3>scrolling as an example, is very similar to what happened

0:44:14.760 --> 0:44:18.480
<v Speaker 3>in the beginning of the pandemic with the toilet paper, right, So,

0:44:19.480 --> 0:44:22.640
<v Speaker 3>why did everyone suddenly want toilet paper? Why did everyone

0:44:22.680 --> 0:44:25.600
<v Speaker 3>suddenly want bottled water? Like, it's not like, oh, we

0:44:25.680 --> 0:44:28.640
<v Speaker 3>have a pandemic now the water is the water is poisoned.

0:44:28.640 --> 0:44:31.840
<v Speaker 3>It's not poisoned. It's just that we wanted to be

0:44:32.000 --> 0:44:37.560
<v Speaker 3>able to have control of something when everything else was

0:44:37.640 --> 0:44:41.439
<v Speaker 3>completely chaotic, like our world's turned upside down. I went

0:44:41.480 --> 0:44:43.480
<v Speaker 3>from you know, being a work on a Friday and

0:44:43.520 --> 0:44:46.080
<v Speaker 3>now I'm home on a Monday, like, oh, what am

0:44:46.080 --> 0:44:49.480
<v Speaker 3>I supposed to do now? And that was really that's

0:44:49.560 --> 0:44:51.640
<v Speaker 3>that was really scary to a lot of us because

0:44:52.719 --> 0:44:58.360
<v Speaker 3>we maintained schedules and our mind our minds were maintaining

0:44:58.480 --> 0:45:01.480
<v Speaker 3>routines that even if the routine we're annoying, like sitting

0:45:01.480 --> 0:45:04.560
<v Speaker 3>in traffic or you know, having to go to work

0:45:04.600 --> 0:45:07.160
<v Speaker 3>and talk to your coworker who you don't like, they

0:45:07.200 --> 0:45:11.960
<v Speaker 3>were still things that your mind could count on. So

0:45:12.160 --> 0:45:14.960
<v Speaker 3>humans are first of all, social creatures, and we're also

0:45:15.040 --> 0:45:18.520
<v Speaker 3>creatures of habit, and when you take away both, you're

0:45:18.520 --> 0:45:22.080
<v Speaker 3>gonna have what we now have, which is probably the

0:45:22.280 --> 0:45:26.200
<v Speaker 3>largest global mental health crisis that we've ever encountered. So

0:45:27.160 --> 0:45:28.759
<v Speaker 3>if we're going to talk about, you know, why do

0:45:28.800 --> 0:45:31.359
<v Speaker 3>people feel this way? Even why do I feel this way?

0:45:31.400 --> 0:45:36.239
<v Speaker 3>Sometimes because again, we're used to habit and we're used

0:45:36.280 --> 0:45:40.400
<v Speaker 3>to structure, and it's gone. It's gone. Like we're trying to,

0:45:40.719 --> 0:45:43.799
<v Speaker 3>you know, six seven months in, I can honestly say

0:45:43.840 --> 0:45:46.799
<v Speaker 3>that I have a better structure, but it's still not

0:45:47.719 --> 0:45:50.120
<v Speaker 3>what the what I'm used to for the majority of

0:45:50.160 --> 0:45:53.760
<v Speaker 3>my life. So we're kind of just looking for things

0:45:53.840 --> 0:45:57.320
<v Speaker 3>to you know, gain control over. I think for you know, honestly,

0:45:57.360 --> 0:46:02.080
<v Speaker 3>for people who are anti masks wearers, Yes, it's silly

0:46:02.160 --> 0:46:04.080
<v Speaker 3>to me as a physician, like why would you not

0:46:04.120 --> 0:46:07.080
<v Speaker 3>wear a mask? Like I respect myself and even if

0:46:07.120 --> 0:46:10.080
<v Speaker 3>you don't respect me, like you should respect yourself and

0:46:10.120 --> 0:46:12.640
<v Speaker 3>not want to get sick potentially for me. But I

0:46:12.640 --> 0:46:15.080
<v Speaker 3>think a lot of it is that they're like, Okay,

0:46:15.480 --> 0:46:18.239
<v Speaker 3>I can this is something I can control. I can

0:46:18.280 --> 0:46:20.480
<v Speaker 3>control whether I want to wear my mask or not.

0:46:21.200 --> 0:46:24.040
<v Speaker 3>Even though you know, maybe I'll get a ticket depending

0:46:24.080 --> 0:46:27.000
<v Speaker 3>on the town or the city, or you know, maybe

0:46:27.040 --> 0:46:29.640
<v Speaker 3>somebody will yell at me, you know, depending upon the

0:46:30.320 --> 0:46:35.319
<v Speaker 3>business they answer. But it's I mean, it's become, unfortunately

0:46:35.360 --> 0:46:39.400
<v Speaker 3>and overwhelmingly very political. But it just reminds me a

0:46:39.440 --> 0:46:41.920
<v Speaker 3>lot of like we have to hold toilet paper and

0:46:42.040 --> 0:46:45.279
<v Speaker 3>water because you know, what's like, what's going to happen.

0:46:45.320 --> 0:46:47.040
<v Speaker 3>I'm like, I have no idea what was up with

0:46:47.080 --> 0:46:50.600
<v Speaker 3>the toilet paper thing, but I actually have like obsessive

0:46:50.600 --> 0:46:53.680
<v Speaker 3>compulsive personality disorder, so I have a habit of hoarding

0:46:54.040 --> 0:46:58.640
<v Speaker 3>cleaning products. Anyway, So I was actually pretty good, you said.

0:46:58.760 --> 0:47:02.239
<v Speaker 2>I do feel like theirs, the Survivalists, they really came

0:47:02.239 --> 0:47:06.360
<v Speaker 2>out on top. Oh listen, but they were life and

0:47:06.480 --> 0:47:08.480
<v Speaker 2>like second their can beans for months.

0:47:08.600 --> 0:47:10.759
<v Speaker 4>Yes, they're like I told you. And someone like my

0:47:10.840 --> 0:47:12.040
<v Speaker 4>mom who's a nurse and who.

0:47:11.960 --> 0:47:14.880
<v Speaker 1>Was like I've been told y'alln't watched him filthy.

0:47:14.520 --> 0:47:20.200
<v Speaker 3>And exactly like yeah that daybody. I mean, as a physician,

0:47:20.239 --> 0:47:23.600
<v Speaker 3>I've been around a lot of sticky, you know, nasty

0:47:23.680 --> 0:47:26.920
<v Speaker 3>kind of situations, but it really was until this pandemic

0:47:26.920 --> 0:47:30.279
<v Speaker 3>that I was like, damn, Like, people are nasty, like

0:47:30.360 --> 0:47:34.160
<v Speaker 3>y'all like collectively, like y'all do not wash your hands

0:47:34.320 --> 0:47:36.320
<v Speaker 3>like it used to be, you know, like I would

0:47:36.320 --> 0:47:38.080
<v Speaker 3>go out to the movies and then you know, I

0:47:38.080 --> 0:47:40.120
<v Speaker 3>would you know, go use the bathroom and go wash

0:47:40.120 --> 0:47:42.040
<v Speaker 3>my hands in the in the restroom, and then if

0:47:42.040 --> 0:47:44.160
<v Speaker 3>there would always be like somebody in there who wouldn't

0:47:44.160 --> 0:47:46.520
<v Speaker 3>and we would all be like, oh, like she's nasty.

0:47:47.000 --> 0:47:50.799
<v Speaker 3>But you know it was because of you know, like

0:47:50.920 --> 0:47:53.000
<v Speaker 3>people like that are people who you know, oh, let

0:47:53.040 --> 0:47:54.640
<v Speaker 3>me drink after you, let me be all up in

0:47:54.680 --> 0:47:58.320
<v Speaker 3>your face. I mean that's you know, unfortunately, how you

0:47:58.400 --> 0:47:59.479
<v Speaker 3>know some of us got sick.

0:48:01.120 --> 0:48:03.359
<v Speaker 2>Well, let's talk about healthy ways of coping. I mean

0:48:03.400 --> 0:48:06.560
<v Speaker 2>you mentioned sort of like you want to control something,

0:48:06.640 --> 0:48:08.440
<v Speaker 2>So like, what are the things we can do to

0:48:08.560 --> 0:48:11.399
<v Speaker 2>bring back some sense of normalcy and control in our

0:48:11.440 --> 0:48:15.560
<v Speaker 2>lives when everything feels like it's batshit crazy?

0:48:15.800 --> 0:48:20.279
<v Speaker 3>Right? So, I think the first thing to do is,

0:48:20.360 --> 0:48:22.680
<v Speaker 3>and this is kind of the hard the hardest thing

0:48:22.760 --> 0:48:25.160
<v Speaker 3>to do is to admit that your stress. Admit that

0:48:25.200 --> 0:48:28.440
<v Speaker 3>you're anxious, Admit you're depressed, Admit that you can't sleep,

0:48:28.520 --> 0:48:31.319
<v Speaker 3>Admit to yourself that you know, even though we've been

0:48:31.360 --> 0:48:33.680
<v Speaker 3>in this for a long time. We're now at the

0:48:33.719 --> 0:48:39.680
<v Speaker 3>point where we're quote unquote used to it. We're not

0:48:40.440 --> 0:48:43.360
<v Speaker 3>on like a fundamental level, but it's like, Okay, today's Monday,

0:48:43.360 --> 0:48:45.280
<v Speaker 3>I'm going to do this. I look at my schedule,

0:48:45.320 --> 0:48:48.080
<v Speaker 3>I'm going to do that. But it's not an ideal situation.

0:48:48.280 --> 0:48:52.400
<v Speaker 3>So admitting that you have an issue, admitting that you

0:48:53.280 --> 0:48:55.680
<v Speaker 3>are not comfortable, like things are not right to the

0:48:55.680 --> 0:48:58.440
<v Speaker 3>point where it might be interfering with your day to

0:48:58.560 --> 0:49:02.719
<v Speaker 3>day and interfering with your mental well being is key.

0:49:03.480 --> 0:49:07.680
<v Speaker 3>After that, I would think that the best thing to

0:49:07.760 --> 0:49:12.200
<v Speaker 3>do is for someone to talk to someone they trust,

0:49:13.000 --> 0:49:16.520
<v Speaker 3>because you'd be surprised. And I'm speaking as somebody who

0:49:16.600 --> 0:49:20.320
<v Speaker 3>has a history of depression and anxiety, you'd be surprised.

0:49:20.400 --> 0:49:22.920
<v Speaker 3>Or I was really surprised at how helpful it was

0:49:23.000 --> 0:49:26.879
<v Speaker 3>to get my feelings out of my body. And when

0:49:26.920 --> 0:49:29.399
<v Speaker 3>you're dealing with depression and anxiety, a lot of it

0:49:29.440 --> 0:49:31.480
<v Speaker 3>is guilt driven. It's like, well, I don't want to

0:49:31.480 --> 0:49:34.399
<v Speaker 3>burden this person, you know, with my personal issues because

0:49:34.400 --> 0:49:37.200
<v Speaker 3>they're going through all this stuff too. And you know what,

0:49:37.280 --> 0:49:39.239
<v Speaker 3>if that person is a real, real friend to you

0:49:39.400 --> 0:49:41.520
<v Speaker 3>and they really care about you, and love you. They'll

0:49:41.560 --> 0:49:43.719
<v Speaker 3>listen to you and they'll you know, kind of help

0:49:43.800 --> 0:49:45.719
<v Speaker 3>you through it. And that person might also be going

0:49:45.760 --> 0:49:48.280
<v Speaker 3>through things and you could also serve as an inspiration

0:49:48.680 --> 0:49:50.759
<v Speaker 3>but that you know, for your friend the loved one

0:49:50.760 --> 0:49:52.400
<v Speaker 3>to be like you know what, like I you know, like,

0:49:52.480 --> 0:49:56.640
<v Speaker 3>let's talk about this. I think the third thing to

0:49:56.760 --> 0:50:03.040
<v Speaker 3>do is to really set a routine. And Mandy, you

0:50:03.040 --> 0:50:06.000
<v Speaker 3>and I spoke yesterday and I definitely agreed with you

0:50:06.080 --> 0:50:09.600
<v Speaker 3>at the time. Like I like routine versus schedule. Like

0:50:09.640 --> 0:50:13.040
<v Speaker 3>a schedule sounds like, oh, this is my class schedule

0:50:13.080 --> 0:50:15.359
<v Speaker 3>for the day, like these are things that like I

0:50:15.480 --> 0:50:17.319
<v Speaker 3>have to do, but I don't really want to do.

0:50:17.840 --> 0:50:21.359
<v Speaker 3>Versus a routine, which is like, oh, I'm gonna wake

0:50:21.440 --> 0:50:23.120
<v Speaker 3>up at this time because that's when I want to

0:50:23.120 --> 0:50:25.319
<v Speaker 3>wake up or that's when I might need to wake up.

0:50:25.400 --> 0:50:28.960
<v Speaker 3>It's a routine to me sounds I mean, it's semantics,

0:50:28.960 --> 0:50:32.319
<v Speaker 3>but it sounds like it's more it's something that I

0:50:32.360 --> 0:50:37.279
<v Speaker 3>can control. It's more manageable, so you know, depending upon

0:50:37.520 --> 0:50:40.279
<v Speaker 3>you know, the person's you know, lifestyle or what they

0:50:40.280 --> 0:50:42.320
<v Speaker 3>need to do. I mean, I remember in the beginning

0:50:42.360 --> 0:50:44.319
<v Speaker 3>of the pandemic, I actually was trying to schedule like

0:50:44.360 --> 0:50:48.440
<v Speaker 3>cocktail hour during during the early evening, like I can

0:50:48.480 --> 0:50:51.200
<v Speaker 3>maybe not yeah, like maybe not even drinks, but like

0:50:51.280 --> 0:50:54.160
<v Speaker 3>cannopis like something like I was just like I need

0:50:54.600 --> 0:50:58.919
<v Speaker 3>something to just make my day feel like, oh, look

0:50:58.920 --> 0:51:02.000
<v Speaker 3>at this, we're having a good time. And then I think,

0:51:02.400 --> 0:51:06.240
<v Speaker 3>you know, the other thing that people really need to consider.

0:51:06.360 --> 0:51:09.759
<v Speaker 3>And as terrible as this pandemic has been for a

0:51:09.800 --> 0:51:12.960
<v Speaker 3>lot of people, the one thing that has really been

0:51:13.120 --> 0:51:16.600
<v Speaker 3>great about it is that there are actually it's actually

0:51:16.880 --> 0:51:21.800
<v Speaker 3>easier to get hooked up with mental health services because

0:51:22.280 --> 0:51:26.960
<v Speaker 3>most mental health clinics aren't open, but they do see

0:51:26.960 --> 0:51:31.600
<v Speaker 3>patients or you know, or referrals or clients via apps,

0:51:31.760 --> 0:51:38.600
<v Speaker 3>via video chat, via telephone. Even so, it really has

0:51:39.120 --> 0:51:44.279
<v Speaker 3>at least in psychiatry and psychology, whereas telemedicine or telehealth

0:51:44.360 --> 0:51:47.479
<v Speaker 3>was something that some of us were into, Like now

0:51:47.520 --> 0:51:50.440
<v Speaker 3>we all have to be into it because if that's

0:51:50.600 --> 0:51:52.880
<v Speaker 3>if we don't get used to it, we don't get

0:51:53.640 --> 0:51:55.799
<v Speaker 3>acclimated to it, we're not going to have patients. We're

0:51:55.840 --> 0:51:58.120
<v Speaker 3>not going to be able to treat people and have

0:51:58.440 --> 0:52:00.319
<v Speaker 3>and help people feel better the way that we need

0:52:00.360 --> 0:52:03.239
<v Speaker 3>to right now. And you know, I think the I

0:52:03.280 --> 0:52:05.600
<v Speaker 3>think the last thing. And this is going to sound,

0:52:05.800 --> 0:52:09.600
<v Speaker 3>you know, kind of obvious, like Captain obvious. But you know,

0:52:09.640 --> 0:52:11.799
<v Speaker 3>I tell people. I tell my patients like, you know,

0:52:11.880 --> 0:52:14.960
<v Speaker 3>if you if you don't have a pre existing medical

0:52:14.960 --> 0:52:18.279
<v Speaker 3>condition that's preventing you from going outside, like go outside,

0:52:19.080 --> 0:52:23.160
<v Speaker 3>like go outside. Because I'm as an introvert, I love

0:52:23.200 --> 0:52:24.520
<v Speaker 3>being in the house. I'll stay in the house all

0:52:24.560 --> 0:52:28.200
<v Speaker 3>day long. But when I finally am like, okay, we

0:52:28.280 --> 0:52:30.239
<v Speaker 3>got to go outside, I'm like, oh my god, it's

0:52:30.239 --> 0:52:31.920
<v Speaker 3>so nice out here, like look look at this, like

0:52:31.960 --> 0:52:33.680
<v Speaker 3>look at these trees. Like I can feel the air

0:52:34.040 --> 0:52:37.080
<v Speaker 3>now right now in La and in California, like the

0:52:37.120 --> 0:52:39.759
<v Speaker 3>whole state's on fire. So that sometimes there's like, yeah,

0:52:39.800 --> 0:52:42.600
<v Speaker 3>maybe don't bring you deeply out there. Yeah, like yeah,

0:52:42.680 --> 0:52:44.400
<v Speaker 3>I mean I've been in the house for the past

0:52:44.520 --> 0:52:46.799
<v Speaker 3>like four or five days, so I'm starting to feel

0:52:46.800 --> 0:52:49.440
<v Speaker 3>a little bit antsy. But you know, I think exercise

0:52:49.520 --> 0:52:52.800
<v Speaker 3>is important, like you like, we really need to find

0:52:52.960 --> 0:52:57.279
<v Speaker 3>what we can do to increase our levels of serotonin

0:52:57.440 --> 0:53:01.080
<v Speaker 3>in our brains so that we don't end up dipping

0:53:01.120 --> 0:53:03.799
<v Speaker 3>into depression anxiety, but unfortunately a lot of us have.

0:53:04.400 --> 0:53:08.200
<v Speaker 2>It almost brings up another important point you mentioned, like

0:53:08.239 --> 0:53:10.680
<v Speaker 2>guilt and shame, And I feel like there was this

0:53:10.800 --> 0:53:13.160
<v Speaker 2>something that happened with the pandemic where people who were

0:53:13.200 --> 0:53:16.120
<v Speaker 2>at home. It wasn't just like let's go outside. It's like, Oh,

0:53:16.239 --> 0:53:17.640
<v Speaker 2>I'm gonna this is what I'm going to train for

0:53:17.680 --> 0:53:19.960
<v Speaker 2>a marathon, or I'm going to learn how I'm going

0:53:20.000 --> 0:53:23.360
<v Speaker 2>to start the triathlon. I always wanted to do myself personally.

0:53:23.400 --> 0:53:25.680
<v Speaker 2>I got a peloton and I'm now it's something that

0:53:25.719 --> 0:53:27.480
<v Speaker 2>I'm like, oh, why am I not on the peloton?

0:53:27.520 --> 0:53:29.680
<v Speaker 2>Why do I don't have a hundred rides yet? And

0:53:29.719 --> 0:53:32.200
<v Speaker 2>it's almost like, you know, you can take these little

0:53:32.200 --> 0:53:34.000
<v Speaker 2>things that maybe make you feel better, but then that

0:53:34.080 --> 0:53:36.359
<v Speaker 2>becomes the stick that you beat yourself with a little

0:53:36.360 --> 0:53:37.920
<v Speaker 2>bit when it comes to like guilt and shame.

0:53:38.040 --> 0:53:40.399
<v Speaker 3>So how do we like talk, How can we.

0:53:40.440 --> 0:53:44.399
<v Speaker 2>Just give ourselves a break for not going so over

0:53:44.440 --> 0:53:46.640
<v Speaker 2>the top of this extra time that we perceive that

0:53:46.680 --> 0:53:49.600
<v Speaker 2>we have. And you know, like there's this idea that

0:53:49.640 --> 0:53:51.680
<v Speaker 2>you can win quarantine by learning.

0:53:51.400 --> 0:53:55.239
<v Speaker 3>A new hobby or a language. Why are we doing

0:53:55.280 --> 0:53:59.680
<v Speaker 3>that to ourselves? We're doing that to ourselves because we

0:53:59.680 --> 0:54:04.399
<v Speaker 3>were so go, go go before the shutdown. So I

0:54:04.480 --> 0:54:07.319
<v Speaker 3>remember distinctly, I'd wake up, I'd go work out at

0:54:07.360 --> 0:54:10.040
<v Speaker 3>six am. I'd come home, help my son with his

0:54:10.160 --> 0:54:13.000
<v Speaker 3>lunch and make him breakfast, take him school, come back home,

0:54:13.239 --> 0:54:16.440
<v Speaker 3>run four miles, check my schedule, seem you know, Like

0:54:16.520 --> 0:54:19.280
<v Speaker 3>I was like, the amount of things I was cramming

0:54:19.280 --> 0:54:23.040
<v Speaker 3>into a day was absurd. It was absurd. And it

0:54:23.120 --> 0:54:26.680
<v Speaker 3>wasn't until you know, I was as we all were

0:54:26.800 --> 0:54:28.520
<v Speaker 3>forced to take a step back that I was like,

0:54:28.880 --> 0:54:32.040
<v Speaker 3>what why are you doing this? Like like are you

0:54:32.040 --> 0:54:36.399
<v Speaker 3>gonna win something at the end? Like no. So once

0:54:36.440 --> 0:54:39.239
<v Speaker 3>I was able to slow down, it really afforded me

0:54:39.280 --> 0:54:42.480
<v Speaker 3>the opportunity. I mean, it was hard, but once I

0:54:42.520 --> 0:54:44.400
<v Speaker 3>was able to slow down, I was able to really

0:54:44.880 --> 0:54:47.640
<v Speaker 3>just take stock up, you know, like what do you want?

0:54:47.840 --> 0:54:50.319
<v Speaker 3>Like what do you want out of life? Not out

0:54:50.320 --> 0:54:53.680
<v Speaker 3>of Wednesday, not out of this job? Like what do

0:54:53.760 --> 0:54:56.399
<v Speaker 3>you want? And I was like, honestly, I'm like, I'm

0:54:56.640 --> 0:54:58.680
<v Speaker 3>I've been grinding since two thousand. I had a med

0:54:58.680 --> 0:55:00.600
<v Speaker 3>school in two thousand. I'm like a bit is tired.

0:55:00.640 --> 0:55:04.120
<v Speaker 3>I'm tired. I'm tired, you know, Like I still want to,

0:55:04.880 --> 0:55:07.560
<v Speaker 3>you know, see patients and make a difference, but you know,

0:55:07.560 --> 0:55:10.440
<v Speaker 3>I don't need to, you know, start training for the

0:55:10.960 --> 0:55:15.080
<v Speaker 3>for you know, a bodybuilding competition or whatever, like these

0:55:15.120 --> 0:55:18.640
<v Speaker 3>goals I had beforehand. It's it again, is is that

0:55:19.440 --> 0:55:25.080
<v Speaker 3>it's that desire to have control of your life, but

0:55:25.600 --> 0:55:28.640
<v Speaker 3>by distracting yourself. So there were a lot of things

0:55:28.680 --> 0:55:31.759
<v Speaker 3>that I was doing just distract myself because I had

0:55:31.800 --> 0:55:37.040
<v Speaker 3>to realize that I wasn't happy. And when I was

0:55:37.080 --> 0:55:39.440
<v Speaker 3>able to do all of those things during the day

0:55:39.480 --> 0:55:43.440
<v Speaker 3>and just pack my day with stuff, did I feel better?

0:55:44.160 --> 0:55:44.480
<v Speaker 1>Maybe?

0:55:44.480 --> 0:55:48.160
<v Speaker 3>Superficially, like did I feel like I'd accomplished something? Yes?

0:55:48.200 --> 0:55:52.680
<v Speaker 3>And I think I equated accomplishing whatever it was quote

0:55:52.760 --> 0:55:58.760
<v Speaker 3>unquote with feeling good about myself. And once that, once

0:55:58.880 --> 0:56:02.120
<v Speaker 3>this pandemic pulled the rug out from under us, we

0:56:02.120 --> 0:56:05.000
<v Speaker 3>were searching for things to do. Like like I saw

0:56:05.120 --> 0:56:07.920
<v Speaker 3>some some meme on Instagram that was going around like

0:56:07.920 --> 0:56:10.360
<v Speaker 3>if you don't come out of this pandemic with the skill,

0:56:10.400 --> 0:56:12.439
<v Speaker 3>then you wasted your time. I'm like, first of all,

0:56:12.600 --> 0:56:15.120
<v Speaker 3>don't tell me what to do. Okay, That's that's number one.

0:56:15.840 --> 0:56:21.200
<v Speaker 3>Number two is number two is everybody should be allowed

0:56:21.400 --> 0:56:25.439
<v Speaker 3>and everybody is allowed to live their own life as

0:56:25.480 --> 0:56:29.360
<v Speaker 3>they see fit and you know, do I do I

0:56:29.440 --> 0:56:31.040
<v Speaker 3>want to learn how to knit? Do I want to

0:56:31.120 --> 0:56:33.560
<v Speaker 3>learn how to you know, do needle? Point of course

0:56:33.600 --> 0:56:35.680
<v Speaker 3>I do, But this may not be the right time

0:56:36.000 --> 0:56:41.000
<v Speaker 3>because I'm not able to full I don't have Like honestly,

0:56:41.040 --> 0:56:43.239
<v Speaker 3>we're at a point where we don't know what's gonna

0:56:43.280 --> 0:56:46.840
<v Speaker 3>happen tomorrow, Like I like, I legit, don't know whereas

0:56:46.920 --> 0:56:51.080
<v Speaker 3>before the shutdown, like you know, people would say metaphorically like, well,

0:56:51.400 --> 0:56:54.440
<v Speaker 3>you know, tomorrow's not promised, so live for today, and

0:56:54.480 --> 0:56:56.319
<v Speaker 3>you would feel it on like a certain level. But

0:56:56.360 --> 0:56:57.840
<v Speaker 3>now I feel it and I know that on a

0:56:57.840 --> 0:56:59.800
<v Speaker 3>cellular level, like I do not know what's going to

0:56:59.800 --> 0:57:03.960
<v Speaker 3>happen tomorrow. I don't. Yeah, I don't know what's gonna happen. Politically,

0:57:04.200 --> 0:57:06.839
<v Speaker 3>I don't know what's gonna happen, you know, news wise,

0:57:06.880 --> 0:57:09.360
<v Speaker 3>I don't know what's gonna happen regarding COVID, Like you know,

0:57:09.440 --> 0:57:12.719
<v Speaker 3>are we due for the killer locuswarm that you know

0:57:13.080 --> 0:57:16.120
<v Speaker 3>we should be experienced? What's the point of it all

0:57:16.120 --> 0:57:16.520
<v Speaker 3>about it?

0:57:16.920 --> 0:57:20.760
<v Speaker 2>Like why this is I'm like playing Devil's advocate, but

0:57:20.840 --> 0:57:23.120
<v Speaker 2>this is like a small part of me inside my

0:57:23.160 --> 0:57:25.200
<v Speaker 2>brain that I'm constantly trying to talk down off the

0:57:25.240 --> 0:57:26.880
<v Speaker 2>ledge is like, what's the point in saving?

0:57:26.920 --> 0:57:28.960
<v Speaker 3>Why don't you just blow your money now? Like I

0:57:29.000 --> 0:57:29.800
<v Speaker 3>mean on what really?

0:57:29.840 --> 0:57:32.320
<v Speaker 2>But you know, I feel like financially people are and

0:57:32.360 --> 0:57:34.160
<v Speaker 2>you and I talked about this too, like the sense

0:57:34.200 --> 0:57:36.480
<v Speaker 2>of the structure that you have with your budget, Like

0:57:36.520 --> 0:57:39.120
<v Speaker 2>even something as simple as a household budget seems to

0:57:39.200 --> 0:57:43.960
<v Speaker 2>feel so silly or like doesn't really compute with today's world.

0:57:44.040 --> 0:57:46.840
<v Speaker 2>So how can you adjust, like mentally, how you look

0:57:46.880 --> 0:57:49.320
<v Speaker 2>at your finances and your financial planning. So much of

0:57:49.360 --> 0:57:51.960
<v Speaker 2>that has to do with the future, which none of

0:57:52.040 --> 0:57:54.520
<v Speaker 2>us can predict right now. A lot of it, like

0:57:54.520 --> 0:57:57.240
<v Speaker 2>when we were talking before, a lot of for me,

0:57:57.400 --> 0:58:01.000
<v Speaker 2>budgeting is very tied into my self worth because budgeting

0:58:01.080 --> 0:58:05.080
<v Speaker 2>involves money and I have you know, we're in a

0:58:05.080 --> 0:58:08.680
<v Speaker 2>capitalistic we're in a capitalist society, so I have oftentimes

0:58:08.680 --> 0:58:14.960
<v Speaker 2>equated more money equals you know, better better self worth,

0:58:15.840 --> 0:58:19.040
<v Speaker 2>which is really terrible in hindsight for me to have

0:58:19.080 --> 0:58:21.640
<v Speaker 2>even thought that, But that's really what we're taught, right

0:58:22.280 --> 0:58:25.120
<v Speaker 2>I would say that I'm sorry I asked me that question.

0:58:24.880 --> 0:58:27.680
<v Speaker 4>Again because I totally forgot you are so much likely

0:58:27.680 --> 0:58:28.440
<v Speaker 4>I'm like doctor money.

0:58:28.440 --> 0:58:33.920
<v Speaker 3>Are we like, uh no, it's cod yesterday. I'm like

0:58:33.960 --> 0:58:36.959
<v Speaker 3>this may like I'll be like yeah, and then I'm like, wait,

0:58:37.120 --> 0:58:40.200
<v Speaker 3>what the future? The future?

0:58:40.240 --> 0:58:42.800
<v Speaker 2>How do we like make decisions today when it's so

0:58:42.840 --> 0:58:45.160
<v Speaker 2>hard for us to like remind like Wanda, we were talking,

0:58:45.200 --> 0:58:48.480
<v Speaker 2>Tiffany imagines herself in the future as Wanda, and everything

0:58:48.520 --> 0:58:50.560
<v Speaker 2>she does is for Wanda, so Wanda can be happy

0:58:50.560 --> 0:58:51.440
<v Speaker 2>and you mean, like.

0:58:51.440 --> 0:58:55.080
<v Speaker 3>Love Wanda, Like I got you.

0:58:54.600 --> 0:58:57.560
<v Speaker 4>Right, because Wanda sounds like the sassy old lady dad,

0:58:57.640 --> 0:59:01.080
<v Speaker 4>because I just see Wanda custoder I made.

0:58:59.520 --> 0:59:05.880
<v Speaker 3>I mean, I've always I've always I've always contended my

0:59:05.880 --> 0:59:10.720
<v Speaker 3>spirit animal. Yes, because honestly, I mean, and that's that's

0:59:10.800 --> 0:59:12.640
<v Speaker 3>kind of a good point to make right now. Shannane

0:59:13.120 --> 0:59:17.480
<v Speaker 3>was is I'm guessing she's still alive in our consciousness.

0:59:17.560 --> 0:59:20.960
<v Speaker 3>Shnane is a small business owner. She does very well

0:59:20.960 --> 0:59:24.720
<v Speaker 3>with her salon. She has support. She had key Lo

0:59:24.720 --> 0:59:28.000
<v Speaker 3>Lo and her other friend and every you know, and

0:59:28.080 --> 0:59:30.400
<v Speaker 3>she every so often she got to, you know, have fun.

0:59:30.440 --> 0:59:32.480
<v Speaker 3>But for the most part, Shannane was a hard worker.

0:59:32.520 --> 0:59:34.560
<v Speaker 3>So I think, you know, if I imadgine it myself

0:59:34.600 --> 0:59:39.000
<v Speaker 3>as Bartin's character art Lawren's character on Shanne like that

0:59:39.000 --> 0:59:42.240
<v Speaker 3>that actually, I mean real talk, That honestly is probably

0:59:42.240 --> 0:59:44.240
<v Speaker 3>what I'm gonna do when I get off this phone call,

0:59:44.240 --> 0:59:45.840
<v Speaker 3>because I do need to like work on my budget,

0:59:46.120 --> 0:59:50.560
<v Speaker 3>but I think that that's a good thing to do.

0:59:50.640 --> 0:59:54.120
<v Speaker 3>Like what like imagining yourself as Wanda, Yes it's you. Yes,

0:59:54.200 --> 0:59:56.520
<v Speaker 3>I mean we're kind of used to in this day

0:59:56.560 --> 0:59:59.560
<v Speaker 3>and age with social media, imagining ourselves as an avatar.

1:00:00.280 --> 1:00:07.000
<v Speaker 3>But there's something in psychiatry psychology that we call like

1:00:07.000 --> 1:00:09.400
<v Speaker 3>like you. When I'm talking to somebody, let's say, who's

1:00:09.440 --> 1:00:12.480
<v Speaker 3>experiencing depression or has in the past, and I will

1:00:12.520 --> 1:00:16.160
<v Speaker 3>sometimes ask questions to determine if their goal oriented or

1:00:16.200 --> 1:00:19.360
<v Speaker 3>future oriented. Right A lot of us are not goal

1:00:19.440 --> 1:00:21.960
<v Speaker 3>or future oriented right now because we don't know what's

1:00:21.960 --> 1:00:24.240
<v Speaker 3>going to happen from day to day. But if we

1:00:24.400 --> 1:00:28.120
<v Speaker 3>can kind of imagine ourselves not as our Oh, I'm

1:00:28.160 --> 1:00:29.600
<v Speaker 3>going to be my best self. I'm going to run

1:00:29.600 --> 1:00:31.800
<v Speaker 3>this marathon. I'm gonna have like a thousand rides on

1:00:31.880 --> 1:00:36.240
<v Speaker 3>peloton this month. Like it's not that it's not it's

1:00:36.280 --> 1:00:39.040
<v Speaker 3>not like a goal oriented like I hit this goal.

1:00:39.320 --> 1:00:43.120
<v Speaker 3>It's more so needs to be about imagining yourself in

1:00:43.160 --> 1:00:47.000
<v Speaker 3>a happy place despite what's going on, because we are

1:00:47.280 --> 1:00:49.040
<v Speaker 3>we're in a new normal. It's not going to be

1:00:49.120 --> 1:00:51.880
<v Speaker 3>the same way as it was before. It isn't. I mean,

1:00:51.880 --> 1:00:56.160
<v Speaker 3>I don't know anybody personally who would feel comfortable walking

1:00:56.200 --> 1:00:59.720
<v Speaker 3>around without a mask, like in the airport, in a

1:00:59.760 --> 1:01:02.919
<v Speaker 3>rest and you like anything like that. So I think

1:01:02.960 --> 1:01:06.040
<v Speaker 3>it is. I think it's good to focus on what

1:01:06.120 --> 1:01:08.720
<v Speaker 3>do I like. I want to be someone who is

1:01:08.760 --> 1:01:12.640
<v Speaker 3>at peace. I want to be someone who definitely feels confident.

1:01:13.160 --> 1:01:16.520
<v Speaker 3>And when it comes to budgeting, I know that I

1:01:16.600 --> 1:01:18.720
<v Speaker 3>was having a hard time last month because I actually

1:01:18.800 --> 1:01:21.760
<v Speaker 3>was starting to slip back into having some anxiety and depression.

1:01:22.240 --> 1:01:25.920
<v Speaker 3>And so I was telling Mandy this yesterday. I was like,

1:01:26.000 --> 1:01:28.640
<v Speaker 3>you know, I like there were some bills that they

1:01:28.680 --> 1:01:30.520
<v Speaker 3>were like, Amie, are you gonna pay these bills? Or

1:01:30.560 --> 1:01:32.640
<v Speaker 3>like what's up? Cause you usually do and now you're not.

1:01:33.040 --> 1:01:36.720
<v Speaker 3>And it was because I was just so cloudy with

1:01:36.760 --> 1:01:39.520
<v Speaker 3>my thoughts because some of my depressive and my depression

1:01:39.520 --> 1:01:44.320
<v Speaker 3>and anxiety symptoms came back. And honestly, I would say

1:01:44.360 --> 1:01:47.240
<v Speaker 3>over the past two weeks, as I had my medication adjusted,

1:01:47.320 --> 1:01:50.360
<v Speaker 3>like I had an increased I have been more go

1:01:50.520 --> 1:01:53.200
<v Speaker 3>with the flow, like water off a ducts back. But

1:01:53.320 --> 1:01:56.720
<v Speaker 3>I was, I mean seriously, like stressing in bed, like

1:01:57.000 --> 1:01:59.800
<v Speaker 3>damn you didn't pay you at and T cell phone bill,

1:01:59.840 --> 1:02:02.320
<v Speaker 3>like look at you like like you like you really

1:02:02.360 --> 1:02:05.400
<v Speaker 3>fucking up right now. And it's not that serious. It's not.

1:02:05.800 --> 1:02:08.160
<v Speaker 3>It's just that I needed to get to a better

1:02:08.200 --> 1:02:11.400
<v Speaker 3>place where I felt better. So I think that when

1:02:11.400 --> 1:02:15.240
<v Speaker 3>it comes to budgeting, it's it's important, but I'm I'm

1:02:15.240 --> 1:02:17.200
<v Speaker 3>gonna have to change my budget to reflect the fact

1:02:17.200 --> 1:02:19.000
<v Speaker 3>that like I don't go nowhere, I don't have to

1:02:20.280 --> 1:02:26.000
<v Speaker 3>I don't have to include my restaurant the restaurant portion

1:02:26.080 --> 1:02:28.400
<v Speaker 3>of my budget where I that I would usually use. Now.

1:02:28.440 --> 1:02:30.840
<v Speaker 3>I will say this last month, when I wasn't feeling

1:02:30.840 --> 1:02:33.360
<v Speaker 3>that great, I was, I was like, oh, nobody's on

1:02:33.400 --> 1:02:38.240
<v Speaker 3>Postmates word okay, like and then it's like, oh, well,

1:02:38.240 --> 1:02:39.760
<v Speaker 3>that's going to cover it up. But then I ended

1:02:39.840 --> 1:02:41.720
<v Speaker 3>up like feeling bad about it later because I was like,

1:02:41.760 --> 1:02:43.840
<v Speaker 3>you don't need to do that. So I think we

1:02:43.960 --> 1:02:47.880
<v Speaker 3>need to really look at the at a budget or

1:02:48.040 --> 1:02:53.920
<v Speaker 3>this this new normal budget as things that we need

1:02:54.320 --> 1:02:57.760
<v Speaker 3>not necessarily to feel happy and great because I bought

1:02:57.800 --> 1:02:59.240
<v Speaker 3>a lot of dumb shit, and I'm like, where are

1:02:59.240 --> 1:03:03.080
<v Speaker 3>you gonna go with them? Sneakers? Nowhere? Like you don't

1:03:03.120 --> 1:03:05.120
<v Speaker 3>need these things? But I think we really need to

1:03:05.240 --> 1:03:07.680
<v Speaker 3>just just look at you know, how can we make

1:03:07.760 --> 1:03:10.680
<v Speaker 3>things easier for us? How? You know, do we need

1:03:10.720 --> 1:03:14.040
<v Speaker 3>to outsource certain things? Does our budget allow for that?

1:03:14.240 --> 1:03:17.400
<v Speaker 3>Because it wasn't really until like maybe last year that

1:03:17.440 --> 1:03:20.280
<v Speaker 3>I was like, Oh, I really need to like outsource

1:03:20.320 --> 1:03:22.440
<v Speaker 3>these things, like there are things that I can afford

1:03:22.880 --> 1:03:25.320
<v Speaker 3>to outsource, or you know, there were even things that

1:03:25.360 --> 1:03:27.760
<v Speaker 3>I would barter for other with other people with for

1:03:27.840 --> 1:03:30.360
<v Speaker 3>other people with. So you know, I think we need

1:03:30.400 --> 1:03:34.360
<v Speaker 3>to get to a point, or people hopefully can get

1:03:34.360 --> 1:03:37.640
<v Speaker 3>to a point where they feel they feel better about themselves.

1:03:37.640 --> 1:03:40.640
<v Speaker 3>And that really might involve someone talking to a mental

1:03:40.680 --> 1:03:44.800
<v Speaker 3>health therapist or a mental health clinician or a psychiatrist, psychologists,

1:03:44.800 --> 1:03:47.840
<v Speaker 3>what have you, but also talking about like what are

1:03:47.840 --> 1:03:51.280
<v Speaker 3>the things that make me me? What are the and

1:03:51.640 --> 1:03:56.080
<v Speaker 3>maybe what are the negative coping strategies that I was

1:03:56.360 --> 1:04:01.120
<v Speaker 3>using before the pandit, before COVID that I've carried with

1:04:01.240 --> 1:04:03.120
<v Speaker 3>me into this pandemic.

1:04:04.240 --> 1:04:07.880
<v Speaker 2>Snacks, Yes, I was just looking all of that in

1:04:09.120 --> 1:04:12.000
<v Speaker 2>to have you've been quiet, what are you thinking over there?

1:04:13.000 --> 1:04:16.400
<v Speaker 4>I've just been thinking that, Like one of the what

1:04:16.560 --> 1:04:19.440
<v Speaker 4>I love, Well, I guess if there is any bright

1:04:19.520 --> 1:04:24.480
<v Speaker 4>side to all of this darkness is how comfortable people

1:04:24.560 --> 1:04:29.120
<v Speaker 4>have gotten talking about therapy and suggesting therapy to each other.

1:04:29.160 --> 1:04:31.400
<v Speaker 4>And when I mean people, I mean black folks. That

1:04:31.760 --> 1:04:33.760
<v Speaker 4>never was a thing. It was like, gree you better pray.

1:04:34.040 --> 1:04:37.680
<v Speaker 4>No one talked about therapy, and it's just become like

1:04:37.720 --> 1:04:39.080
<v Speaker 4>I just said it to someone the other day.

1:04:39.480 --> 1:04:41.400
<v Speaker 1>I was like, yeah, well, you know, have you considered therapy?

1:04:41.440 --> 1:04:42.880
<v Speaker 1>They're like yeah, yeah, even.

1:04:42.720 --> 1:04:46.240
<v Speaker 4>Like my churchy friends, which is like, I mean, you know,

1:04:46.320 --> 1:04:48.000
<v Speaker 4>that was never a thing. Like when I have a

1:04:48.080 --> 1:04:50.600
<v Speaker 4>super churchy friend and she was like, oh I talk

1:04:50.600 --> 1:04:52.960
<v Speaker 4>to my therapist today, so great. And I just thought,

1:04:53.480 --> 1:04:55.440
<v Speaker 4>you know, if there is a bright side, it's the

1:04:55.480 --> 1:05:00.280
<v Speaker 4>fact that people are understanding that you need help and

1:05:00.320 --> 1:05:02.960
<v Speaker 4>that going to therapy is not a replacement for God

1:05:03.040 --> 1:05:06.080
<v Speaker 4>in prayer, and that they can work in tandem together.

1:05:06.320 --> 1:05:08.000
<v Speaker 3>Thank you, you know.

1:05:08.360 --> 1:05:10.880
<v Speaker 4>And I'm loving because people like you know, like Sarah

1:05:10.920 --> 1:05:12.800
<v Speaker 4>Jake's Robert, she says that all the time, which I

1:05:12.840 --> 1:05:15.960
<v Speaker 4>love because so many people look up to her TJ's daughter,

1:05:16.840 --> 1:05:18.640
<v Speaker 4>and so, yeah, So I guess I was just thinking

1:05:18.640 --> 1:05:20.600
<v Speaker 4>about that because quite honestly, I've been dragging my feet.

1:05:20.600 --> 1:05:22.560
<v Speaker 4>I've been needing a therapist. I want a black woman

1:05:23.320 --> 1:05:26.640
<v Speaker 4>for the longest, just to there are what I do.

1:05:27.400 --> 1:05:29.280
<v Speaker 4>I have several companies that I want. It could be

1:05:29.360 --> 1:05:32.560
<v Speaker 4>really stressful, and sometimes I won't even know that I'm

1:05:32.560 --> 1:05:34.440
<v Speaker 4>stressed until I'm like, yeah, so, what's the last time

1:05:34.480 --> 1:05:37.840
<v Speaker 4>you slept fully? You know, So just having a place

1:05:37.920 --> 1:05:40.800
<v Speaker 4>to because I'm like the go to for everyone. There's

1:05:40.800 --> 1:05:43.360
<v Speaker 4>literally times when I feel like I'm everyone's pulling a

1:05:43.400 --> 1:05:47.800
<v Speaker 4>finger a toe. Yes, I'm just like like what people

1:05:47.840 --> 1:05:49.520
<v Speaker 4>are like I text you, I'm like, I have fifty

1:05:49.560 --> 1:05:51.160
<v Speaker 4>unread text text is a new email?

1:05:52.760 --> 1:05:53.120
<v Speaker 2>I mean?

1:05:53.560 --> 1:05:56.360
<v Speaker 4>So yeah, So, I mean I just think that if

1:05:56.400 --> 1:05:58.160
<v Speaker 4>if anything else is just is like tiven AAA to

1:05:58.160 --> 1:05:59.880
<v Speaker 4>find a therapist. I don't know why I've been dragging

1:05:59.880 --> 1:06:03.080
<v Speaker 4>my I guess I'm just like, ugh, I don't feel

1:06:03.080 --> 1:06:05.600
<v Speaker 4>like interviewing people and figuring out the right person and

1:06:05.680 --> 1:06:06.920
<v Speaker 4>how am I going to make time for them? I

1:06:06.920 --> 1:06:08.440
<v Speaker 4>don't even have time for myself.

1:06:09.160 --> 1:06:11.240
<v Speaker 3>True, But then you know it's funny, there was something

1:06:11.360 --> 1:06:13.680
<v Speaker 3>there there was like this work. It was like busy

1:06:13.760 --> 1:06:15.680
<v Speaker 3>work that I had to complete for my job, and

1:06:15.720 --> 1:06:17.880
<v Speaker 3>I finally got around to like finishing it today and

1:06:17.920 --> 1:06:20.120
<v Speaker 3>I was like, it's gonna say so long and I

1:06:20.160 --> 1:06:22.959
<v Speaker 3>don't feel like doing it. It literally was data entry

1:06:23.240 --> 1:06:26.040
<v Speaker 3>like this, It was not a big deal. And then

1:06:26.080 --> 1:06:28.200
<v Speaker 3>today when I was doing it now that like, I'm

1:06:28.240 --> 1:06:30.960
<v Speaker 3>not you know, my motivation is better because I'm not depressed.

1:06:31.240 --> 1:06:33.080
<v Speaker 3>I was like, eman, you could have been done that,

1:06:33.240 --> 1:06:35.680
<v Speaker 3>But I didn't get on myself about it. I was like,

1:06:35.720 --> 1:06:37.760
<v Speaker 3>you know what, we're going to use this as a

1:06:37.840 --> 1:06:41.480
<v Speaker 3>you know, a learning point, Like you didn't do it

1:06:41.480 --> 1:06:44.160
<v Speaker 3>before because you weren't feeling right and you got some

1:06:44.320 --> 1:06:47.760
<v Speaker 3>help and now you feel better and that's okay, so

1:06:48.360 --> 1:06:51.320
<v Speaker 3>I will. But something that you said just now reminded

1:06:51.360 --> 1:06:54.240
<v Speaker 3>me of the fact that a lot of people, and

1:06:54.280 --> 1:06:57.439
<v Speaker 3>I think, especially like I'm Generation X because I'm I'm

1:06:57.440 --> 1:07:01.800
<v Speaker 3>almost forty five, so but general X, the baby boomers,

1:07:01.800 --> 1:07:04.280
<v Speaker 3>they always get on millennials and Gen Z like, oh,

1:07:04.320 --> 1:07:06.480
<v Speaker 3>you are so lazy and youing your cell phones and this,

1:07:06.520 --> 1:07:09.919
<v Speaker 3>that and the third. But honestly, I think, not think,

1:07:10.040 --> 1:07:14.400
<v Speaker 3>I definitely know just by following social media trends and

1:07:14.920 --> 1:07:19.800
<v Speaker 3>whatnot that if it weren't for the black millennials, we

1:07:19.840 --> 1:07:23.280
<v Speaker 3>would not be talking about therapy like it's nothing like

1:07:23.400 --> 1:07:25.640
<v Speaker 3>oh yeah, like because they'll legit be like, oh, I

1:07:25.680 --> 1:07:28.040
<v Speaker 3>got a therapist, I got an individual therapist, I got

1:07:28.080 --> 1:07:30.360
<v Speaker 3>a group therapist. Then I have a therapist that I

1:07:30.440 --> 1:07:33.320
<v Speaker 3>check in with like every two months. Like they're very

1:07:33.520 --> 1:07:38.520
<v Speaker 3>pro therapy. And as much as they were maligned and

1:07:39.240 --> 1:07:42.280
<v Speaker 3>for I guess for being like the quote unquote adderall generation,

1:07:43.240 --> 1:07:48.360
<v Speaker 3>they are really taking up the charge to just make

1:07:48.400 --> 1:07:52.840
<v Speaker 3>it very normal. And I really appreciate that. You're welcome.

1:07:55.120 --> 1:07:58.000
<v Speaker 4>Than millennial and I'm I'm generating next as well. I'm

1:07:58.040 --> 1:08:00.640
<v Speaker 4>forty doctor money, so I'm generation LM as well. So

1:08:01.160 --> 1:08:03.240
<v Speaker 4>Mandi's are a local millennial. I'm almost like, what did

1:08:03.280 --> 1:08:06.080
<v Speaker 4>the millennials say? Even though sometimes Mandy's like an old lady,

1:08:06.120 --> 1:08:08.840
<v Speaker 4>I'm like, girl, get with it.

1:08:09.000 --> 1:08:17.160
<v Speaker 2>I'm a layered and complex individual like everyone else. I

1:08:17.200 --> 1:08:20.320
<v Speaker 2>guess it's just like, don't feel it's the it's the

1:08:20.400 --> 1:08:23.160
<v Speaker 2>negative thought spiral, which is and this is for me

1:08:23.240 --> 1:08:26.760
<v Speaker 2>and food because listen, my coping mechanism is food. And

1:08:26.840 --> 1:08:29.720
<v Speaker 2>I am really appalled at how much weight I put

1:08:29.720 --> 1:08:33.080
<v Speaker 2>on in this pandemic. But it's almost like the shame

1:08:33.360 --> 1:08:35.559
<v Speaker 2>of the eating habits that have plagued me for my

1:08:35.760 --> 1:08:38.479
<v Speaker 2>entire life stops me from doing the things that I

1:08:38.560 --> 1:08:40.760
<v Speaker 2>know I can do to make myself feel better, and

1:08:40.800 --> 1:08:43.720
<v Speaker 2>then I feel bad. So then I just layered on

1:08:43.800 --> 1:08:47.400
<v Speaker 2>with more food. And it's this like self fulfilling negative

1:08:47.439 --> 1:08:51.080
<v Speaker 2>prophecy that man, I'm just like and I start beating

1:08:51.120 --> 1:08:53.559
<v Speaker 2>myself up because I'm like Jesus Christ, like, you're thirty

1:08:53.600 --> 1:08:55.840
<v Speaker 2>something years old, shouldn't you be over this by now?

1:08:55.880 --> 1:09:00.000
<v Speaker 2>This isn't cute, but again that we're just we're so hard,

1:09:00.040 --> 1:09:03.080
<v Speaker 2>hard on ourselves, and I this conversation right now is

1:09:03.120 --> 1:09:05.400
<v Speaker 2>just reminding me like we just as much as as

1:09:05.479 --> 1:09:07.479
<v Speaker 2>much as I say it, I know intellectually I need

1:09:07.520 --> 1:09:10.240
<v Speaker 2>to be nicer to myself and just like one day

1:09:10.280 --> 1:09:14.160
<v Speaker 2>after the next, but it's it's really hard to like

1:09:14.280 --> 1:09:20.479
<v Speaker 2>be a human today, a black human, a woman, human, age, location, whatever,

1:09:20.880 --> 1:09:23.799
<v Speaker 2>just a human in your specific part of the world.

1:09:24.320 --> 1:09:27.519
<v Speaker 3>Well, it's interesting that you mentioned like like you're trying

1:09:27.520 --> 1:09:34.320
<v Speaker 3>to intellectualize your your desire to want to make yourself

1:09:34.360 --> 1:09:37.439
<v Speaker 3>feel better by eating, right, So not that I mean

1:09:37.439 --> 1:09:39.800
<v Speaker 3>I'm using an eating disorder as an example. I'm not

1:09:39.800 --> 1:09:41.880
<v Speaker 3>saying you have a eating disorder, but yeah, but probably

1:09:41.880 --> 1:09:45.800
<v Speaker 3>I do go ahead when but when people are when

1:09:45.840 --> 1:09:49.800
<v Speaker 3>people let's say, have binge eating disorder or even anorexia

1:09:49.960 --> 1:09:53.960
<v Speaker 3>nervosa or bulimia where they binge and then they purge.

1:09:54.280 --> 1:09:58.719
<v Speaker 3>I used to actually work at a hospital, an inpatient hospital,

1:09:58.920 --> 1:10:02.280
<v Speaker 3>with with a page who had really really severe eating disorders,

1:10:02.320 --> 1:10:04.200
<v Speaker 3>and the one thing that they all told me, whether

1:10:04.200 --> 1:10:07.759
<v Speaker 3>they were binging, they're binging food or restricting their food

1:10:07.840 --> 1:10:11.519
<v Speaker 3>or purging their food, is that they would get high

1:10:12.000 --> 1:10:18.040
<v Speaker 3>from the maladaptive behavior. So anorexics get high when they're

1:10:18.040 --> 1:10:20.200
<v Speaker 3>not like when I guess when they're blood sugar drops.

1:10:20.200 --> 1:10:22.320
<v Speaker 3>I don't know, because I'm not innarexic, but they do

1:10:22.400 --> 1:10:25.400
<v Speaker 3>feel this state of euphoria, and it's kind of similar

1:10:25.479 --> 1:10:29.120
<v Speaker 3>when you know. I would say most of us, myself included,

1:10:29.200 --> 1:10:31.760
<v Speaker 3>have gained weight during this pandemic because it's like like

1:10:31.880 --> 1:10:33.800
<v Speaker 3>last month, I was like, donuts are amazing, and that's

1:10:33.800 --> 1:10:36.200
<v Speaker 3>really it. So I'd like six and I'm gonna eat

1:10:36.200 --> 1:10:38.400
<v Speaker 3>them every day. I'm gonna eat six donuts every day

1:10:38.640 --> 1:10:44.080
<v Speaker 3>and that's that. Because it is boosting your serotonin in

1:10:44.240 --> 1:10:48.720
<v Speaker 3>your brain, and that's making you feel better, but temporarily,

1:10:49.120 --> 1:10:51.600
<v Speaker 3>and then the guilts and the shame sets in. So

1:10:52.280 --> 1:10:56.000
<v Speaker 3>it's interesting that you know, you, even me, we like

1:10:56.080 --> 1:11:00.439
<v Speaker 3>we're we're creatures that we can't human beings are creatures

1:11:00.439 --> 1:11:04.200
<v Speaker 3>that can you know, intellectualize anything. So it's like, oh, well,

1:11:04.200 --> 1:11:06.000
<v Speaker 3>why do I keep doing this? I've been doing this

1:11:06.040 --> 1:11:08.680
<v Speaker 3>since I was a kid. It's not something that you

1:11:08.720 --> 1:11:11.040
<v Speaker 3>can really, it's not something that you woke up one

1:11:11.120 --> 1:11:15.320
<v Speaker 3>day and decided to do. It's something that your brain decided, well,

1:11:15.720 --> 1:11:18.120
<v Speaker 3>is your serotonin lo, then let's eat everything and then

1:11:18.400 --> 1:11:20.880
<v Speaker 3>and then we'll feel better for maybe like thirty minutes.

1:11:21.760 --> 1:11:24.280
<v Speaker 3>So again, like what you just said in terms of,

1:11:24.880 --> 1:11:27.160
<v Speaker 3>you know, we need to stop beating beating each other

1:11:27.320 --> 1:11:30.280
<v Speaker 3>up so much. It's that's really what it is. And

1:11:30.439 --> 1:11:34.080
<v Speaker 3>I know it's easier said than done, but I've really

1:11:34.120 --> 1:11:38.759
<v Speaker 3>been trying to on the daily, like just think about

1:11:38.800 --> 1:11:41.160
<v Speaker 3>things like you know what, like oh, you had to

1:11:41.240 --> 1:11:43.920
<v Speaker 3>pay that parking ticket. You know what it happens pay

1:11:43.960 --> 1:11:45.960
<v Speaker 3>the parking ticket. Like whereas before I would just look

1:11:45.960 --> 1:11:48.000
<v Speaker 3>at it and then just get mad and then I

1:11:48.080 --> 1:11:50.680
<v Speaker 3>flip it over and then you know, I'm like a

1:11:50.760 --> 1:11:52.720
<v Speaker 3>day before I'm gonna get you know, I have to

1:11:53.040 --> 1:11:55.720
<v Speaker 3>owe the city double. Like, there's so many things that

1:11:56.439 --> 1:12:00.519
<v Speaker 3>I have personally guilted myself over that comple deletely make

1:12:00.600 --> 1:12:03.799
<v Speaker 3>no sense, but that was a function of me having

1:12:03.840 --> 1:12:05.760
<v Speaker 3>symptoms of mental illness.

1:12:06.960 --> 1:12:09.240
<v Speaker 2>I feel like we could keep talking and talking and

1:12:09.600 --> 1:12:13.960
<v Speaker 2>talking talking, Doctor Money. It's been really amazing you having

1:12:14.280 --> 1:12:16.880
<v Speaker 2>amazing you. It's been so amazing having you on the

1:12:16.920 --> 1:12:20.360
<v Speaker 2>show today. I just mean, it's been amazing you both.

1:12:20.439 --> 1:12:26.200
<v Speaker 2>Thank you, Thank you, thank you. Where can people find

1:12:26.200 --> 1:12:28.320
<v Speaker 2>out more about you and what you have going on?

1:12:28.400 --> 1:12:34.720
<v Speaker 3>Now? Okay? Sure, So I'm doctor Emani. I have all

1:12:34.800 --> 1:12:37.320
<v Speaker 3>social media pretty much, but I would say the place

1:12:37.400 --> 1:12:40.760
<v Speaker 3>that I'm most active is Instagram. So I can be

1:12:40.760 --> 1:12:43.760
<v Speaker 3>found on Instagram at doctor d O C T O

1:12:44.040 --> 1:12:48.880
<v Speaker 3>R dot Imani. I also have a website of the

1:12:48.920 --> 1:12:52.960
<v Speaker 3>same name. It's but it's doctor Hyphenemani dot com. People

1:12:53.000 --> 1:12:55.400
<v Speaker 3>can find me on YouTube just search for my name again,

1:12:55.439 --> 1:12:58.920
<v Speaker 3>it's doctor the word spelled out Imani. And I have

1:12:58.960 --> 1:13:03.040
<v Speaker 3>a podcast which is called emanis State of Mind, and

1:13:03.240 --> 1:13:07.120
<v Speaker 3>it's pretty much everywhere there are streaming there's a streaming

1:13:07.160 --> 1:13:11.320
<v Speaker 3>podcast platform. A mini State of Mind is essentially me

1:13:11.479 --> 1:13:14.679
<v Speaker 3>and one of my best friends, and we talk about

1:13:15.360 --> 1:13:18.800
<v Speaker 3>mental health and mental illness and wellness, but we talk

1:13:18.880 --> 1:13:23.840
<v Speaker 3>about it in a very casual, pop culture based situation.

1:13:24.040 --> 1:13:28.680
<v Speaker 3>So it's it's not it's not it's not a sad podcast.

1:13:28.760 --> 1:13:31.120
<v Speaker 3>Like we're definitely giggling the whole time and just like

1:13:31.320 --> 1:13:35.040
<v Speaker 3>just acting silly. But you know, I'm someone who that's

1:13:35.040 --> 1:13:37.280
<v Speaker 3>my personality. I'm just kind of goofy by nature, and

1:13:37.320 --> 1:13:39.240
<v Speaker 3>that's how I am with my patients and my friends,

1:13:39.800 --> 1:13:42.000
<v Speaker 3>and so I wanted to at least show people that

1:13:42.160 --> 1:13:45.839
<v Speaker 3>mental health doesn't have to be dour and sad and scary.

1:13:46.040 --> 1:13:49.280
<v Speaker 3>It actually can be a lot of fun. So that's

1:13:49.520 --> 1:13:51.439
<v Speaker 3>that's really kind of like my baby, So that's why

1:13:51.439 --> 1:13:54.479
<v Speaker 3>I spent so much time explaining that. But but yeah,

1:13:54.520 --> 1:13:59.000
<v Speaker 3>Emani state of Mind, YouTube, Instagram, my website. I guess

1:13:59.000 --> 1:14:01.760
<v Speaker 3>if you want to see me, you could always go

1:14:01.840 --> 1:14:05.559
<v Speaker 3>to Bravo dot com, Sorry, BravoTV dot com. I'm one

1:14:05.560 --> 1:14:10.479
<v Speaker 3>of the cast members of Married to Medicine Los Angeles. Yeah,

1:14:10.479 --> 1:14:12.479
<v Speaker 3>and I think I pretty much exhausted all of my

1:14:13.400 --> 1:14:17.000
<v Speaker 3>oh my avenues, what's your address?

1:14:17.400 --> 1:14:21.599
<v Speaker 2>I know, right, okay, so I'm just kidding. Well, thank

1:14:21.640 --> 1:14:25.040
<v Speaker 2>you so so much. This was illuminating. I mean, I

1:14:25.040 --> 1:14:27.719
<v Speaker 2>feel like if every therapist was like you, people would

1:14:27.760 --> 1:14:29.320
<v Speaker 2>not be afraid to go to therapies.

1:14:29.880 --> 1:14:32.760
<v Speaker 3>Yeah that's so nice. Yeah, I'm an open book because

1:14:32.760 --> 1:14:34.960
<v Speaker 3>I'm like, I mean, the patients that I see, I

1:14:35.000 --> 1:14:37.280
<v Speaker 3>have clients, so because people are going to ask us

1:14:38.320 --> 1:14:39.880
<v Speaker 3>the I'm sorry, what'd you say?

1:14:39.920 --> 1:14:40.160
<v Speaker 1>I said?

1:14:40.160 --> 1:14:41.640
<v Speaker 2>People are going to ask us. Yeah, how can I

1:14:41.640 --> 1:14:43.200
<v Speaker 2>get an appointment with doctor Amani?

1:14:44.080 --> 1:14:48.360
<v Speaker 3>So okay, I have been I have been considering reopening

1:14:48.360 --> 1:14:51.240
<v Speaker 3>my private practice because that actually has been occurring more.

1:14:51.320 --> 1:14:54.960
<v Speaker 3>But the patients that I see are actually their referrals

1:14:55.000 --> 1:14:59.400
<v Speaker 3>through the hospital I work for, so I would I

1:14:59.439 --> 1:15:01.479
<v Speaker 3>would say probably the best way to get at a

1:15:01.520 --> 1:15:04.280
<v Speaker 3>quote unquote appointment with me is to listen to my podcast.

1:15:05.120 --> 1:15:06.080
<v Speaker 3>It's really good, y'all.

1:15:06.120 --> 1:15:08.200
<v Speaker 2>Listen to the most recent when the New Normal, and

1:15:08.240 --> 1:15:09.880
<v Speaker 2>it felt like your friend on the other end of

1:15:09.920 --> 1:15:11.920
<v Speaker 2>it was like everybody else just like, don't tell me

1:15:11.960 --> 1:15:12.719
<v Speaker 2>it's the new normal.

1:15:12.880 --> 1:15:16.920
<v Speaker 3>I refuse to believe it. Yeah, Cam as well, but yeah,

1:15:16.920 --> 1:15:19.960
<v Speaker 3>we had we have a really good time. But yeah,

1:15:20.000 --> 1:15:22.280
<v Speaker 3>I just wanted to have somebody on my podcast. That

1:15:22.680 --> 1:15:25.880
<v Speaker 3>would be the common person as opposed to me who

1:15:26.439 --> 1:15:29.240
<v Speaker 3>you know, if if, if you you know, keeps talking

1:15:29.240 --> 1:15:31.719
<v Speaker 3>to me, I'm gonna start sounding like, you know, a professor,

1:15:31.760 --> 1:15:35.000
<v Speaker 3>and I don't want to do that. You went to Xavier.

1:15:35.479 --> 1:15:41.520
<v Speaker 4>True yeah true the doctor Fay true true true true.

1:15:42.840 --> 1:15:46.560
<v Speaker 2>All right, Well y'all go check out Doctor and Money everywhere,

1:15:46.720 --> 1:15:49.360
<v Speaker 2>and thank you again Doctor Money for coming on Brown Ambition.

1:15:49.840 --> 1:15:50.760
<v Speaker 1>Of course, thank you.

1:15:50.840 --> 1:15:52.720
<v Speaker 3>This was super fun. I'm glad I got to meet

1:15:52.760 --> 1:16:08.080
<v Speaker 3>you guys,