WEBVTT - David Dastmalchian 0:00:00.080 --> 0:00:01.800 I've had this happen to me before, and it's been 0:00:01.800 --> 0:00:03.880 really difficult when I've been in a scene or a 0:00:03.880 --> 0:00:08.560 production with someone who's like, I'm ready, I'm there. I 0:00:08.680 --> 0:00:09.600 got there, man. 0:00:09.720 --> 0:00:12.959 I thought about my dead dog, and now I'm ready 0:00:13.000 --> 0:00:15.200 to cry roll the cameras. 0:00:20.880 --> 0:00:24.880 Hi, I'm David Desmalchin and I am an actor. 0:00:31.520 --> 0:00:35.640 Welcome back, everybody, Thank you for joining me for another 0:00:35.760 --> 0:00:40.520 episode of Off the Beat. This is your host, Brian Baumgartner. 0:00:40.760 --> 0:00:45.200 Today we have a very spooky guest, a little insane 0:00:45.800 --> 0:00:49.640 lurking in the shadows, or at least that's the type 0:00:49.680 --> 0:00:53.920 of character he often plays. The great actor and well, 0:00:54.040 --> 0:00:58.440 let's call him the King of Darkness. David Deastmulchin is 0:00:58.440 --> 0:01:02.040 with us today. You might know him from such blockbusters 0:01:02.160 --> 0:01:06.319 as The Dark Knight, Ant Man, The Suicide Squad, or 0:01:06.360 --> 0:01:09.640 even Oppenheimer. Or maybe you've seen the films he wrote 0:01:09.760 --> 0:01:14.720 and starred in, Animals and All Creatures here below, Or 0:01:14.760 --> 0:01:17.639 if you're into comic books, David is also the author 0:01:17.680 --> 0:01:22.360 of the series Count Crawley Reluctant Midnight Monster Hunter. Or 0:01:22.480 --> 0:01:25.880 if you've been casket shopping lately, you might know him 0:01:25.880 --> 0:01:30.240 from his partnership with titan caskets, whatever the case may be. 0:01:30.600 --> 0:01:33.320 He is a multi hyphen it in the industry, and 0:01:33.360 --> 0:01:37.039 he does it all very very well. I might add, 0:01:37.200 --> 0:01:39.160 we're going to talk about how he got all those 0:01:39.240 --> 0:01:42.720 hyphens in the first place, how he overcame addiction and 0:01:42.959 --> 0:01:46.640 ended up a movie star. His latest film, Late Night 0:01:46.880 --> 0:01:50.120 with the Devil. I cannot wait to see it. Let's 0:01:50.160 --> 0:01:57.360 get the conversation going. Here is the immensely talented David Destmulchin. 0:02:00.480 --> 0:02:08.000 Bubble and Squeak. I love it, Bubble and Squeakna Bubble 0:02:08.080 --> 0:02:11.920 and Squeaker cook it every month. Lift over from the 0:02:12.080 --> 0:02:13.080 night Boat. 0:02:23.480 --> 0:02:24.359 What's up, David? 0:02:25.200 --> 0:02:26.440 Hey, how's it going? 0:02:26.520 --> 0:02:26.760 Man? 0:02:27.480 --> 0:02:31.080 So nice to meet you, see you on this weird place. 0:02:31.200 --> 0:02:34.720 But I was just I was just with somebody who 0:02:34.720 --> 0:02:37.200 I believe you know. I could be wrong, but I 0:02:37.200 --> 0:02:39.480 feel like you're friendly with if you're not friends with 0:02:39.600 --> 0:02:43.320 Steve Age. Oh, you guys know each other. I think 0:02:43.360 --> 0:02:46.160 you guys know one another. We did somewhere in the 0:02:46.320 --> 0:02:47.160 comedy world. 0:02:47.400 --> 0:02:47.840 Yes way. 0:02:48.200 --> 0:02:50.040 It was his birthday today and I threw him a 0:02:50.080 --> 0:02:52.280 little birthday brunch. His birthday was on Sunday, but I 0:02:52.280 --> 0:02:54.120 threw my birthday brunch and I rushed back because I 0:02:54.120 --> 0:02:55.480 was excited to get to talk to you. 0:02:56.040 --> 0:02:59.720 Oh well, that is uh, that's so nice. Happy birthday 0:02:59.760 --> 0:03:00.359 to Steve. 0:03:01.160 --> 0:03:03.560 Shout out to Steve Ag. Everybody, shout out. 0:03:03.760 --> 0:03:07.040 Shout out to the legend, the master Steve Agent. 0:03:07.080 --> 0:03:10.000 Weeks after his birthday, we're gonna be giving him a 0:03:10.000 --> 0:03:11.760 shout out. I don't even know when this is gonna air, 0:03:11.840 --> 0:03:12.560 but that's okay. 0:03:13.639 --> 0:03:17.640 Well, several weeks ago it was Steve AG's birthday. Everybody 0:03:17.840 --> 0:03:23.400 which begs, of course, the question, where was my invite? 0:03:23.520 --> 0:03:24.680 I mean, was it fun? 0:03:25.400 --> 0:03:29.279 It was very fun. It was Blue Jam Cafe and Tarzana, 0:03:29.400 --> 0:03:33.399 which serves really delicious French toast. If anybody's a fan 0:03:33.440 --> 0:03:37.120 of French toast, you go to Blue Jam Cafe and Tarzana, 0:03:37.160 --> 0:03:40.720 and you never know, you may stumble upon the birthday 0:03:40.760 --> 0:03:44.200 party for Steve Ag and his cluster of middle aged 0:03:44.760 --> 0:03:49.040 dude friends who sit around and yuck it up and 0:03:49.360 --> 0:03:51.880 probably overstay. Are welcome. 0:03:52.600 --> 0:03:55.520 Here's the thing. Blue Jam Cafe, I know it very well. 0:03:56.160 --> 0:04:00.720 There's one there in West Hollywood, Hollywood, there on on 0:04:00.840 --> 0:04:04.400 Melrose or something. Here's the thing about the French toast, 0:04:04.920 --> 0:04:09.040 or at least if you have a friendly or semi 0:04:09.160 --> 0:04:13.840 famous face. You debate whether to order the French toast, 0:04:14.000 --> 0:04:16.960 you choose not to, and then they'll bring it to 0:04:17.000 --> 0:04:17.480 you anyway. 0:04:18.000 --> 0:04:20.880 Oh wow, because I ordered oatmeal and you know what 0:04:20.960 --> 0:04:21.479 they brought me? 0:04:22.160 --> 0:04:23.400 What oatmeal? 0:04:25.480 --> 0:04:28.400 I got? Screwed? Man, I don't have a friendly face. Though, 0:04:28.640 --> 0:04:32.760 this is like the creepy, scary character actor face. I 0:04:32.760 --> 0:04:36.240 guess that probably nobody's thinking, well, let's show him a 0:04:36.320 --> 0:04:39.120 kind gesture, that poor man looks like he could use 0:04:39.160 --> 0:04:42.480 a nice slice of our famous French toast. No, they're 0:04:42.480 --> 0:04:45.000 probably like, get him his oatmeal, get him out of here, 0:04:45.640 --> 0:04:48.359 get him out or some amount of people. Yeah, he 0:04:48.400 --> 0:04:49.720 makes people uncomfortable. 0:04:51.760 --> 0:04:55.280 Well, we're certainly going to talk about that. I mean, well, actually, 0:04:55.279 --> 0:04:58.200 before we get into it, I was thinking about this 0:04:58.560 --> 0:05:00.200 knowing that I was going to talk about you on 0:05:00.240 --> 0:05:03.400 our past. We have never met before, but I've been 0:05:03.480 --> 0:05:06.440 a fan of your work for a long time. So 0:05:06.560 --> 0:05:12.640 we're both character actors. Yes, but very very different in 0:05:12.680 --> 0:05:16.880 a way. And not that I don't do creepy, but 0:05:16.960 --> 0:05:20.359 maybe I do more, you know, in the drama world, 0:05:20.440 --> 0:05:25.040 maybe I do more scary or like, I don't know 0:05:25.080 --> 0:05:27.000 what it is, like I mean like. 0:05:27.120 --> 0:05:31.840 He You've got this wonderful range, and I'm always so 0:05:32.640 --> 0:05:39.239 impressed by artists who can play different instruments really well, 0:05:39.440 --> 0:05:46.159 Like I feel like you can play dry, deadpan, sweet, vulnerable, 0:05:46.400 --> 0:05:49.640 and then yeah, I've seen you be totally the opposite 0:05:49.720 --> 0:05:53.080 of Obviously, there's the things that you're known for. If 0:05:53.120 --> 0:05:55.000 you will, I think the sand goes for me where 0:05:55.000 --> 0:05:57.400 people like, oh, I know you from and it's always 0:05:57.480 --> 0:06:00.880 kind of the same things. But I do in the 0:06:01.040 --> 0:06:04.320 dream of being the kind of artists that or actor 0:06:04.400 --> 0:06:08.120 or whatever we want to call ourselves that can live 0:06:08.120 --> 0:06:10.160 in space, and it's it seems like you feel the 0:06:10.200 --> 0:06:13.000 same way, since you're comfortable describing yourself as such. I 0:06:13.000 --> 0:06:15.839 think that being a character actor, although maybe we don't 0:06:15.839 --> 0:06:17.960 get as many zero's at the end of our checks, 0:06:18.160 --> 0:06:21.719 we tend to get a lot of freedom and flexibility 0:06:21.720 --> 0:06:24.240 in the sense that we get the opportunity to stretch 0:06:24.680 --> 0:06:29.760 in ways that sometimes different types of journeys go for actors. 0:06:29.839 --> 0:06:31.039 And I think it's a real gift. 0:06:31.240 --> 0:06:34.440 You know, it's a real gift. You're right, And honestly, 0:06:34.480 --> 0:06:36.240 the only reason I brought this up I was searching 0:06:36.279 --> 0:06:42.120 for compliments. But aside from that, there's an edge that 0:06:42.240 --> 0:06:46.760 I admire in you, and I'm not talking physically, but 0:06:47.080 --> 0:06:53.520 there's a sharpness and angularity maybe that I think is 0:06:53.600 --> 0:06:59.120 maybe more subversive than me, and maybe part of it 0:06:59.200 --> 0:07:02.680 is physically as well. But it's interesting to me because 0:07:03.160 --> 0:07:06.160 while we would sort of on the surface both describe 0:07:06.200 --> 0:07:09.440 ourselves as character actors, I think we use that term 0:07:09.800 --> 0:07:14.440 so often and so loosely that it's it's almost reductive 0:07:14.840 --> 0:07:15.200 in a way. 0:07:15.280 --> 0:07:19.080 Does that make sense, Yeah, it is, but I prefer it. 0:07:19.960 --> 0:07:24.800 I think people go They'll say things to me like, oh, 0:07:24.840 --> 0:07:26.640 when are you going to get a leading role or 0:07:26.680 --> 0:07:30.040 something like that, and I kind of think I've never 0:07:30.280 --> 0:07:35.160 felt like I'm not getting awesome roles. I've always been like, 0:07:36.000 --> 0:07:38.320 if I think about the movies I've been in where 0:07:38.360 --> 0:07:41.880 I have played minor supporting or a supporting or a 0:07:41.920 --> 0:07:46.680 major supporting role, who has been whatever he's been meant 0:07:46.720 --> 0:07:49.640 to be in the purpose of serving the story and 0:07:49.680 --> 0:07:52.520 the protagonist and the director's vision. If I look at 0:07:52.520 --> 0:07:54.680 the film as a whole, I can't imagine. I can't 0:07:54.680 --> 0:07:56.480 look at a film and be like, Oh, I should 0:07:56.480 --> 0:08:01.440 have been there's there. I was meant to play Bob 0:08:01.520 --> 0:08:03.640 till I look at a movie like The Dark Knight, 0:08:03.760 --> 0:08:07.160 and I don't think to myself like I wish I 0:08:07.200 --> 0:08:09.640 would have been the Batman or the Joker. No, I 0:08:09.640 --> 0:08:12.760 think like that role just seemed like it was just 0:08:12.880 --> 0:08:18.920 so suited for what my skills and joy. People often 0:08:19.080 --> 0:08:22.400 ask me like, oh, You've made such great choices in 0:08:22.440 --> 0:08:24.960 your career, and I wish that I could take more 0:08:25.000 --> 0:08:27.720 credit than the Roulette wheel of being an actor. I 0:08:27.760 --> 0:08:32.040 wish that I was some savante artist living in my cabin, 0:08:32.200 --> 0:08:37.000 cobbling shoes and getting to go no, no, no, no, oh, 0:08:37.120 --> 0:08:40.600 yes that one. Oh that. It's just not my reality. 0:08:40.640 --> 0:08:45.120 I'm a working actor who reads work. I'm just so 0:08:45.679 --> 0:08:51.679 I think dedicated maybe to the kind of stuff that 0:08:51.760 --> 0:08:57.800 I consume as a watcher, reader, listener that maybe energetically 0:08:58.040 --> 0:09:01.959 in some woiy way, it's maybe like made me do 0:09:02.080 --> 0:09:06.640 better auditions or have stronger energetic connections to material that 0:09:06.880 --> 0:09:09.520 is in the genre space is a little more in 0:09:09.520 --> 0:09:13.160 the dark shadows whatever. But the times I've said no 0:09:13.320 --> 0:09:16.920 to things genuinely, and there's been stuff that I have 0:09:17.080 --> 0:09:22.240 absolutely done because it wasn't my favorite script or role, 0:09:22.320 --> 0:09:24.679 but I was like, I'm working, I need to work 0:09:24.920 --> 0:09:28.960 and I know I can make something useful and help 0:09:29.040 --> 0:09:32.719 this story. The times when I have said no was 0:09:32.800 --> 0:09:36.120 either because there was no money, and that happens often 0:09:36.160 --> 0:09:38.120 where people go, we've got this great project and we 0:09:38.200 --> 0:09:39.680 just can't pay you, and I go, I'm sorry. I 0:09:39.679 --> 0:09:41.480 have to support a family. And when I'm going to 0:09:41.600 --> 0:09:44.600 do no money work, it's always my own stuff because 0:09:44.600 --> 0:09:46.920 I'm always trying to make my own little things. So 0:09:47.440 --> 0:09:49.280 I try to block out three or four months a 0:09:49.360 --> 0:09:53.280 year of no money work, and that's always my own stuff. 0:09:53.320 --> 0:09:57.680 But the other reason is only when I genuinely try 0:09:57.800 --> 0:10:00.600 to connect with the material and I feel like I 0:10:00.679 --> 0:10:04.440 can't find my way into it, and I won't do 0:10:04.600 --> 0:10:12.320 it because I genuinely believe you can see it, you 0:10:12.360 --> 0:10:16.440 can feel it in a performance. If you don't connect 0:10:16.520 --> 0:10:18.600 with in any way, shape or form, or you're just 0:10:18.720 --> 0:10:21.400 like I would be doing a great disservice to somebody 0:10:21.400 --> 0:10:24.160 who's paying me or someone who's trying to direct me. 0:10:24.840 --> 0:10:27.800 If my internal monologue is I don't connect with this 0:10:27.960 --> 0:10:30.200 at all, I feel like that would be really hard. 0:10:30.360 --> 0:10:33.560 So aside from that, though, I'm kind of a yes man, 0:10:33.760 --> 0:10:37.760 and luckily that's just snowballed into getting to work with 0:10:37.800 --> 0:10:41.480 really cool people and cool projects, and being open to 0:10:41.600 --> 0:10:44.160 making myself. I think you do this as well, and 0:10:44.200 --> 0:10:47.079 it's another badge of honor in being a character actor. 0:10:47.960 --> 0:10:51.960 The vulnerability of playing the fool, to me is a 0:10:52.040 --> 0:10:55.520 really powerful experience as an actor. I really think getting 0:10:55.559 --> 0:10:58.640 over my fear and my ego and being willing to 0:10:59.880 --> 0:11:03.880 just stand still and be If anyone knows much about 0:11:04.320 --> 0:11:08.000 history of storytelling, theater, comaedia, dell art, whatever, that very 0:11:08.000 --> 0:11:11.040 important function of the fool, and it's not as simple 0:11:11.120 --> 0:11:13.559 or pejorative as it may sound in saying that word 0:11:13.720 --> 0:11:16.880 to your viewers or listeners, but it's like it's actually 0:11:17.320 --> 0:11:20.080 kind of a beautiful place to exist in storytelling. It's 0:11:20.080 --> 0:11:22.800 like I want to strip down myself of all ego. 0:11:22.840 --> 0:11:25.000 I want to just stand there and experience things and 0:11:25.080 --> 0:11:29.400 let the camera capture those feelings of vulnerability. And sometimes 0:11:29.480 --> 0:11:32.640 I'm very lucky that it just it works. Whether it's 0:11:32.679 --> 0:11:35.600 in comedy or drama or horror, it's a place I 0:11:35.679 --> 0:11:36.040 like to go. 0:11:37.320 --> 0:11:42.880 Yeah, I know you grew well. You were born in Pennsylvania, Allentown. Yes, 0:11:43.040 --> 0:11:45.079 you ended up growing up in Kansas City. By the 0:11:45.080 --> 0:11:48.360 way I read, you played football are you a football fan. 0:11:49.080 --> 0:11:51.520 I am a football fan. I've had a very good 0:11:51.600 --> 0:11:55.720 year this year as a Kansas City Fanglas. Thank you 0:11:55.720 --> 0:11:58.160 you're a Cisco fan. 0:11:58.480 --> 0:12:02.120 I'm no, God, oh god, no, no, no, I was 0:12:02.200 --> 0:12:04.840 rooting for you in that game. Let's just say I 0:12:04.920 --> 0:12:08.040 might have had some a financial interest, not a rooting interest, 0:12:08.080 --> 0:12:13.280 but a financial interest in Kansas City. But no, congratulations. 0:12:13.320 --> 0:12:15.920 I mean, you've got those fancy new headphones now. I'm 0:12:15.920 --> 0:12:17.880 glad to see that we won those for you. That's nice. 0:12:17.920 --> 0:12:21.440 I appreciate the team's efforts in making sure that your 0:12:21.480 --> 0:12:26.000 pockets were padded. I honestly don't watch football regularly. I'm 0:12:26.040 --> 0:12:28.320 not a diehard fan. I'm a bit of a fair 0:12:28.360 --> 0:12:30.840 weather fan. I left the field my senior year of 0:12:30.920 --> 0:12:33.920 high school after our last game, a painful loss to 0:12:34.000 --> 0:12:36.880 Shawnee Mission North in which we should have won the game, 0:12:36.920 --> 0:12:40.640 but a couple of really major errors on our team 0:12:40.880 --> 0:12:45.560 part dropped the last literally in the last two minutes 0:12:45.559 --> 0:12:47.959 of the game. We you know, listen, I sound like 0:12:48.040 --> 0:12:51.840 Uncle Rico right now, but I genuinely like I like. 0:12:53.280 --> 0:12:55.640 I walked off the field and football was to me 0:12:56.640 --> 0:12:59.040 a means to an end. I loved playing it at 0:12:59.040 --> 0:13:02.040 the time. I loved my team and my coach and 0:13:02.360 --> 0:13:04.800 the experience of going out on the gridiron and playing 0:13:04.920 --> 0:13:07.600 football and giving it all I had. But my heart 0:13:07.720 --> 0:13:10.160 was definitely I was yearning to be like making haunted 0:13:10.200 --> 0:13:12.240 houses and being in the theater. And I was always 0:13:12.280 --> 0:13:14.760 a little I was building sets for the theater, like 0:13:14.760 --> 0:13:16.840 they were doing a production of Dracula, and I was 0:13:16.880 --> 0:13:19.960 like helping build sets, but I wanted to be in 0:13:20.000 --> 0:13:22.679 the play. I wanted to be, you know, doing that. 0:13:22.960 --> 0:13:25.760 And I had good grades, but not good enough to 0:13:25.800 --> 0:13:28.920 get academic scholarships. But I was good enough at football 0:13:28.960 --> 0:13:31.600 that it was going to help me get to go 0:13:31.679 --> 0:13:35.000 to college. So it was something I really dedicated myself to. 0:13:35.559 --> 0:13:37.800 And then when I walked off the field the end 0:13:37.800 --> 0:13:40.560 of my senior year, I assumed the next summer I 0:13:40.559 --> 0:13:43.000 would be in training at one of the colleges that 0:13:43.160 --> 0:13:46.439 was recruiting me to play football. And I was preparing 0:13:46.480 --> 0:13:48.840 to go do the next six months of continuing to 0:13:48.840 --> 0:13:52.040 get bigger and bigger, and then I was encouraged by 0:13:52.040 --> 0:13:56.280 a couple of teachers to audition for this theater training 0:13:56.320 --> 0:13:59.840 program in Chicago, and I did, and I got a scholarship. 0:14:00.080 --> 0:14:03.600 I completely did a one eighty, and I said, that's 0:14:04.000 --> 0:14:05.920 that's what I want to do. That's what I'm going 0:14:06.000 --> 0:14:06.200 to do. 0:14:06.280 --> 0:14:09.319 And so that's De Paul right, Yes. 0:14:09.240 --> 0:14:10.280 De Paul Theater School. 0:14:10.800 --> 0:14:15.240 So this is a legitimate program here to Paul, I remember, 0:14:15.440 --> 0:14:17.120 to Paul, I mean, I don't know how old we 0:14:17.160 --> 0:14:19.280 are where we're well, I actually I do know how 0:14:19.320 --> 0:14:19.680 old you. 0:14:19.640 --> 0:14:21.800 Are, with forty eight. 0:14:22.280 --> 0:14:24.520 No, I know we're close to the same age, so 0:14:24.600 --> 0:14:26.840 I know De Paul was good. So you're telling me 0:14:26.960 --> 0:14:31.600 you didn't have any experience at that point. 0:14:31.920 --> 0:14:34.960 No formal training. I had done some community theater in 0:14:35.040 --> 0:14:39.360 high school. I had an amazing speech coach in high school. 0:14:39.640 --> 0:14:42.520 I had an awesome drama teacher that we had like 0:14:42.520 --> 0:14:45.760 a repertory theater company at my high school. But I 0:14:45.800 --> 0:14:48.280 had no formal It's funny. When I went to my audition, 0:14:48.960 --> 0:14:51.680 I'm in cut off Jean shorts, a Janis Joplin tied 0:14:51.720 --> 0:14:56.560 it T shirt Chuck Taylor's. I've totally screwed up because 0:14:56.920 --> 0:14:59.640 I didn't realize that they didn't want us to do 0:15:00.280 --> 0:15:03.880 dialect monologues. And I had prepared a monologue from a 0:15:03.880 --> 0:15:07.600 play by Peter Shaffer called Equis and I was kind 0:15:07.600 --> 0:15:09.520 of obsessed with that play in high school. And I 0:15:09.960 --> 0:15:12.920 and I also had done a monologue from Eric Bagosian's 0:15:12.960 --> 0:15:15.320 talk radio where I played a bunch of different characters, 0:15:15.360 --> 0:15:16.920 and they didn't want any of that shit. So I 0:15:16.920 --> 0:15:19.040 show up. Here's all these kids in dance belts with 0:15:19.360 --> 0:15:23.440 jazz shoes on and coming from you know, all these 0:15:23.800 --> 0:15:27.000 training ground places. They just everybody was like, I was 0:15:27.080 --> 0:15:30.640 so intimidated. I was so out of my depth. But 0:15:31.280 --> 0:15:34.560 I had something that I'll always be grateful for that 0:15:34.720 --> 0:15:38.160 Maybe if I had overtrained as a kid and teenager, 0:15:38.200 --> 0:15:41.120 maybe if I had been so ingrained in thinking, I 0:15:41.240 --> 0:15:43.680 had an approach that I knew what I was doing. 0:15:44.080 --> 0:15:46.440 Because I believed that I had no clue what I 0:15:46.480 --> 0:15:49.600 was doing. I was like raw dull. I just was 0:15:49.720 --> 0:15:53.160 like open to and I had this willingness to just 0:15:53.320 --> 0:15:57.480 jump into whatever and kind of make a fool of myself. 0:15:57.920 --> 0:16:00.280 And then I do this monologue completely wrong. And the 0:16:00.320 --> 0:16:03.000 guy running the audition was the dean of the school 0:16:03.000 --> 0:16:04.800 at the time. He's like, no, no, no, what else 0:16:04.840 --> 0:16:07.520 do you got? And in my back pocket, I had 0:16:07.520 --> 0:16:10.240 been reading this play called does a Tiger wear a necktie. 0:16:10.240 --> 0:16:12.760 And I had just started to like kind of on 0:16:12.800 --> 0:16:16.320 my own, do this monologue. And I did it, and 0:16:16.360 --> 0:16:18.800 then I get a letter, you know, two months later 0:16:18.880 --> 0:16:21.080 that's like you get into the school. And I was like, 0:16:21.560 --> 0:16:23.760 that's great, but there's no way I'm going. At that time, 0:16:23.800 --> 0:16:26.760 I think maybe it was sixteen seventeen thousand dollars a year, 0:16:26.800 --> 0:16:28.680 and here I've got an opportunity to go to either 0:16:28.720 --> 0:16:31.560 Iowa or California, or to go back east and get 0:16:31.560 --> 0:16:33.720 like a full ride, you know, to get an English 0:16:33.760 --> 0:16:36.080 degree and play football at one of these other colleges. 0:16:36.400 --> 0:16:39.040 And then this letter comes that says you've or were 0:16:39.040 --> 0:16:42.880 happy to inform you that you've been awarded this this scholarship. 0:16:43.280 --> 0:16:47.160 And I I'll never forget that moment, man, I'll never 0:16:47.200 --> 0:16:49.600 forget opening that letter and seeing that and knowing my 0:16:49.720 --> 0:16:53.720 life was about to change. Now I was going. I 0:16:53.760 --> 0:16:55.320 was going to go to Chicago. I was going to 0:16:55.400 --> 0:16:58.080 go the path of so many of my heroes, you know, 0:16:58.880 --> 0:17:01.520 John Malkovich in this up in Wolf Theater Company and 0:17:01.760 --> 0:17:06.000 the Goodman Theater, and and it happened. It's wild, it's crazy. 0:17:06.040 --> 0:17:07.119 I'm so low, it's awesome. 0:17:07.200 --> 0:17:22.280 I'm so lucky. 0:17:25.600 --> 0:17:29.200 What did De Paul give you? I mean I talk 0:17:29.280 --> 0:17:31.520 about you know, I started in the theater as well, 0:17:31.520 --> 0:17:34.240 and I you know, there was there was a time 0:17:34.320 --> 0:17:38.840 for me where I considered it just something to do 0:17:39.320 --> 0:17:42.280 or more an activity, and then there was a moment 0:17:42.359 --> 0:17:46.560 where my eyes were opened to like the possibility in 0:17:46.640 --> 0:17:51.320 terms of process, in terms of study, in terms of 0:17:52.000 --> 0:17:55.719 you know, just everything that went into what ended up 0:17:55.760 --> 0:17:59.600 being the thing that I love, which is character creation, physical, 0:18:00.359 --> 0:18:03.520 you know, vocal movement, all of those things. Was there 0:18:03.560 --> 0:18:05.480 a moment for you did that happen at to Paul 0:18:05.600 --> 0:18:09.159 where you were like, oh, oh, I see now and 0:18:09.200 --> 0:18:10.080 this is awesome. 0:18:11.000 --> 0:18:16.240 Well, what was wonderful about the curriculum? At the time 0:18:16.280 --> 0:18:18.080 that I went to De Paul it had been kind 0:18:18.080 --> 0:18:20.720 of inherited from the Goodman's School of Drama, and it 0:18:20.800 --> 0:18:25.399 was this old school steeped in Russian theater, in Polish 0:18:25.520 --> 0:18:33.560 lab theater, body work theater, very intensive, very almost monastic 0:18:33.760 --> 0:18:36.280 kind of the way you would you know, you approached 0:18:36.400 --> 0:18:41.680 to the work was your body, your voice, and then 0:18:42.000 --> 0:18:45.000 technique didn't come until you had been there already like 0:18:45.040 --> 0:18:47.600 two years. And it was a really intense environment where 0:18:48.240 --> 0:18:51.840 they would cut maybe a quarter of the students every year. 0:18:52.760 --> 0:18:57.439 I think I just had that openness and willingness because 0:18:57.440 --> 0:19:00.840 I knew nothing, but I knew that I had this 0:19:01.040 --> 0:19:05.080 like attraction to the words, getting the words out of 0:19:05.080 --> 0:19:08.120 my mouth, finding a way to inhabit the body and manufacture. 0:19:09.119 --> 0:19:11.000 In the beginning of the journey, I thought it was 0:19:11.000 --> 0:19:13.399 about finding the way to tap into having the real 0:19:13.520 --> 0:19:18.800 physical and emotional and verbal responses and reactions that I 0:19:18.840 --> 0:19:22.119 would have in the given circumstances. And so we began 0:19:22.800 --> 0:19:26.760 training doing strictly improvisation. It was all Spolen work and 0:19:26.800 --> 0:19:29.200 Dell Close work and all of this really important stuff, 0:19:29.320 --> 0:19:32.800 learning about being present, being in the moment, being a responder, 0:19:32.880 --> 0:19:37.720 to seeing partners, into material and to given circumstances and environment. Oh, 0:19:37.760 --> 0:19:40.040 there was so much emphasis put on how your environment 0:19:40.200 --> 0:19:42.640 affects your body, and just all this work to keep 0:19:42.680 --> 0:19:45.800 you in the space of your imagination so that you 0:19:45.840 --> 0:19:50.680 can pretend to have these experiences, so you can manufacture 0:19:50.840 --> 0:19:55.480 these emotional states of being. And what was really cool 0:19:55.480 --> 0:19:58.280 about it, each of the different teachers you had would 0:19:58.320 --> 0:20:00.520 come from a different school of thought, so you'd have 0:20:00.600 --> 0:20:04.520 somebody with what felt very methody, and somebody you know, 0:20:05.000 --> 0:20:08.399 there was you name it, Stanislavsky on down every book 0:20:08.440 --> 0:20:12.720 that every teacher seemed to have their day. But what 0:20:12.840 --> 0:20:16.240 started to click and crack through for me that I 0:20:16.280 --> 0:20:22.639 didn't realize until much later was the very pragmatic tools 0:20:23.280 --> 0:20:30.680 that I could utilize to manufacture and imagine these states 0:20:30.680 --> 0:20:33.800 of being and then to replicate them. At this point, 0:20:33.840 --> 0:20:35.679 it was strictly theater training, So the idea of being 0:20:35.680 --> 0:20:38.240 able to replicate them on a nightly basis while still 0:20:38.280 --> 0:20:42.080 feeling present and still feeling like you're able to respond 0:20:42.240 --> 0:20:47.359 to any changes that may occur, but finding the tools 0:20:47.560 --> 0:20:50.520 so that I could, if I'm playing Vince in Bury Child, 0:20:50.720 --> 0:20:54.480 scream my guts out for twenty minutes a night, and 0:20:54.560 --> 0:20:56.119 come back and do it the next night and have 0:20:56.160 --> 0:20:59.160 all of my faculties with me. And at that point 0:20:59.200 --> 0:21:01.080 I was still in the place of like, I'm going 0:21:01.160 --> 0:21:03.399 to go there. If I'm in mourning, I'm going to 0:21:03.480 --> 0:21:05.520 lay here and think about all the people who've died, 0:21:05.560 --> 0:21:07.879 and I'm going to build myself up. But what was 0:21:07.920 --> 0:21:10.800 being laid, the groundwork that was being laid underneath that 0:21:10.880 --> 0:21:14.760 approach was a much more technical style and approach of acting. 0:21:15.160 --> 0:21:19.200 And this is just for context, something that I think 0:21:19.280 --> 0:21:21.800 is important to know. During those years when I was 0:21:21.840 --> 0:21:27.720 at school, I had a lot of addressed mental health issues. 0:21:28.200 --> 0:21:33.879 I had a lot of untreated struggles that manifested in 0:21:34.200 --> 0:21:38.639 a pretty debilitating opiate addiction. So by the time I 0:21:38.760 --> 0:21:43.280 left this incredible school with all these incredible tools and knowledge, 0:21:44.000 --> 0:21:45.960 I didn't think I was ever going to act again 0:21:46.000 --> 0:21:49.560 because I just was so lost in the sea of 0:21:49.680 --> 0:21:52.640 my addiction that I swam out in a way from 0:21:52.960 --> 0:21:56.360 kind of society for a number of years, nearly died 0:21:56.400 --> 0:21:59.600 a number of times. Eventually came had a miracle of 0:22:00.160 --> 0:22:02.919 consciousness where I came to the belief and decision that 0:22:02.960 --> 0:22:05.320 I needed help and that I was wanted to live. 0:22:06.320 --> 0:22:07.919 You know, I was like, I was like Frank Cross, 0:22:07.960 --> 0:22:11.680 Bill Murray and Scrooge when he's in his coughin casket 0:22:11.720 --> 0:22:14.560 getting pushed into the to the crematorium and he's like, 0:22:14.600 --> 0:22:16.040 I want to live. I want to live. And it 0:22:16.080 --> 0:22:17.520 was like a miracle. All of a sudden, I was 0:22:17.560 --> 0:22:20.159 alive again. But it took me about five years to 0:22:20.200 --> 0:22:23.719 get back on stage once I got clean, because I 0:22:23.800 --> 0:22:27.000 was so scared that I wouldn't be any good if 0:22:27.040 --> 0:22:30.720 I didn't have the benefit of getting sedatives after work, 0:22:30.960 --> 0:22:35.200 and I was also afraid that going there emotionally every 0:22:35.320 --> 0:22:38.920 night was going to trigger me to relapse. And instead 0:22:39.119 --> 0:22:41.920 what happened was I did I got back on stage, 0:22:41.960 --> 0:22:45.239 and I found that my acting was much better than 0:22:45.240 --> 0:22:47.240 it had ever been before because of all the work 0:22:47.280 --> 0:22:49.760 I had been doing and the sobriety. And then secondly, 0:22:50.680 --> 0:22:56.399 I had this incredible breakthrough where so let's say, and 0:22:56.440 --> 0:22:58.240 it's one of the very first things I did when 0:22:58.240 --> 0:23:00.520 I got back on stage was I played both in 0:23:01.000 --> 0:23:04.360 Oscar Wilde solom and he's a soldier who's so obsessed 0:23:04.359 --> 0:23:07.840 with Solome and when she refutes his advances, he kills 0:23:07.920 --> 0:23:11.199