WEBVTT - "I HAD TO GIVE A RESTRAINING ORDER"

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<v Speaker 1>Hello, Hello, How are you?

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<v Speaker 2>Are you good? How are you?

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<v Speaker 1>I'm a gecko on the computer.

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<v Speaker 2>Life's crazy, Oh, I goes, that sounds very exciting.

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<v Speaker 1>What is what is your name?

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<v Speaker 2>My name Isla? So they still like be talking to.

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<v Speaker 1>You, Liila. It's very nice to be talking to you too.

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<v Speaker 1>Is there anything in particular that, uh you wanted to

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<v Speaker 1>to talk about here?

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<v Speaker 3>Well?

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, like I wanted to first share an experience of

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<v Speaker 2>mine that I had like a couple of years ago

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<v Speaker 2>when I was in high school. So my senior year,

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<v Speaker 2>my high school math teacher actually tried like breaking into

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<v Speaker 2>my home and like causing harm to me and stuff.

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<v Speaker 1>Your math teacher broke into your home?

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, like my algebra math teacher.

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<v Speaker 1>Uh how did that happen?

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<v Speaker 2>Well, like to start, like I took algebra my senior

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<v Speaker 2>year and this is like in twenty nineteen, so this

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<v Speaker 2>was a few years ago. And my actually my identical

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<v Speaker 2>twin sister and I both had him like as our teacher,

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<v Speaker 2>and he was like super normal.

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<v Speaker 1>Uh.

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<v Speaker 2>He was considered a young teacher, like in his early thirties,

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<v Speaker 2>I guess, and like he was like super cool, especially

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<v Speaker 2>for the seniors since we were all going to graduate

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<v Speaker 2>but I started personally noticing like his weird behavior probably

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<v Speaker 2>like a month before, like my twin and I turned eighteen,

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<v Speaker 2>Like no, why, Like there was a point basically where

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<v Speaker 2>like she was at his desk by getting her work

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<v Speaker 2>done or like getting it checked or something, and like

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<v Speaker 2>she walked away, and I like was watching him, and

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<v Speaker 2>like I swear on everything, like I saw him look

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<v Speaker 2>at like my sister's but like I saw him checking

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<v Speaker 2>her out.

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<v Speaker 1>Uh how did this escalate into him going to your house?

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<v Speaker 2>So yeah, so after my twin and I turned in eighteen,

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<v Speaker 2>we definitely like started noticing he was a little bit

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<v Speaker 2>more like hands on with us, which was just sort

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<v Speaker 2>of odd because like our birthdays in April, so like

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<v Speaker 2>the year ended in June, and by then, like we

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<v Speaker 2>basically were seniors, so like most of our work was done,

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<v Speaker 2>So it was sort of odd that he was giving

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<v Speaker 2>us like out of like the entire class and most attention.

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<v Speaker 2>And then it basically started the night of our senior prom.

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<v Speaker 2>He wasn't able to like chaperone, so he was like, oh, like,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, I want all of you guys to like

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<v Speaker 2>send me pictures like of like how you guys look,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, this being sort of like a normal teacher

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<v Speaker 2>towards the end of the year, so like he ing

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<v Speaker 2>out his number to like a bunch of students, including

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<v Speaker 2>my sister and I, and so I remember the night

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<v Speaker 2>of our senior prom, like my sister and I were like, okay,

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<v Speaker 2>like let's send like pictures to silence though, and so

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<v Speaker 2>then we did, and then like the odd thing was

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<v Speaker 2>like he sent like hard eyes back, like the hard

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<v Speaker 2>eye emojis. So I think that's sort of what we

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<v Speaker 2>were just like, eh, like this is sort of weird.

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<v Speaker 2>And so then weekend of our senior prom, like a

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<v Speaker 2>lot of us go down to like the Jersey Shore

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<v Speaker 2>for the weekend, and so the entire weekend, like he

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<v Speaker 2>was sort of like you know, checking in casually saying hey,

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<v Speaker 2>like you know, like hope you guys are like being safe,

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<v Speaker 2>because like he started knew that we were all like

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<v Speaker 2>obviously drinking and stuff, but he was just I don't know,

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<v Speaker 2>he was being sort of normal, but like almost like

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<v Speaker 2>crossing many boundaries.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, well, how did he break into your house?

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<v Speaker 2>Oh? Yeah, Okay, So then continuing on, like we just

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<v Speaker 2>kept like noticing really like shange behavior. He's being super

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<v Speaker 2>like inappropriate at times, like the nineteen sending pictures of

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<v Speaker 2>himself that were completely inappropriate. Also, yeah, so we after

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<v Speaker 2>we got back from our senior prom, like, he bought

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<v Speaker 2>breakfast for like the entire class, and so then after

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<v Speaker 2>we ate, like my twin and I ate at breakfast,

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<v Speaker 2>he got us. We actually ended up getting really sick,

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<v Speaker 2>and we later came to find out that he actually

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<v Speaker 2>drugged us as well.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh my god, Yeah, what were do you, like, were

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<v Speaker 1>you like at his house.

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<v Speaker 2>No, So, like he brought brexis in like to the

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<v Speaker 2>school like four hours class specifically because we had came

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<v Speaker 2>back from like our senior like week and away. So

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<v Speaker 2>it was just like a nice gesture he was trying

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<v Speaker 2>to do. But like my sister and I don't eat

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<v Speaker 2>thee for pork, and he bought like pork bacon like

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<v Speaker 2>egg and cheeses for like most people, So he specifically

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<v Speaker 2>gave my sister and I like a different meal because

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<v Speaker 2>we don't eat that. So we thought it was like

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<v Speaker 2>super nice of him, but then like you later found

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<v Speaker 2>out like we were drugs because we got like really

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<v Speaker 2>insanely sick, both of us, like for the rest of

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<v Speaker 2>the day, like we were like vomiting, So like.

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<v Speaker 1>Is it well, I'll I mean, I guess I'll let

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<v Speaker 1>you finish. But is this guy in jail now or something?

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<v Speaker 2>As of right now, he's not in jail. He did

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<v Speaker 2>get five years probation and I got like a lifelonger

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<v Speaker 2>straining order against him, and so did my sister as well.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, fire sick? Uh what this was? How long ago

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<v Speaker 1>was this?

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<v Speaker 2>So this is in twenty nineteen, so I was like,

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<v Speaker 2>what twenty like about three years ago.

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<v Speaker 1>So he's not in jail, but he's like on probation.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, he ended up giving five years probation just because

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<v Speaker 2>like the prosecutor is also wanted to like spare my

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<v Speaker 2>sister and are like the trials because we didn't really

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<v Speaker 2>feel comfortable like sharing this story in front of like

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<v Speaker 2>you know, our family and friends and peers and stuff.

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<v Speaker 2>So he just like pled guilty and like that's like

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<v Speaker 2>the deal that like we got basically.

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<v Speaker 1>So I mean, let me ask you this. You sound

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<v Speaker 1>I don't know what I mean. You sound very like

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<v Speaker 1>comfortable tone in this story. Now, like how is your

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<v Speaker 1>and I mean I don't know if you are, I

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<v Speaker 1>don't I don't really know how you actually feel I mean,

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<v Speaker 1>how is your kind of perspective and relationship with this situation,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, evolved over the past few years.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I definitely think I've like matured since then and like,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, gotten to the point where I definitely feel

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<v Speaker 2>more comfortable sharing my story. I think in the beginning

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<v Speaker 2>I was super defensive and like honestly like just didn't

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<v Speaker 2>want to talk about it, just completely wanted to ignore

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<v Speaker 2>it because I was honestly just so embarrassed and like confused.

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<v Speaker 2>But it's like now that I recognize that like I

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<v Speaker 2>was groomed, that I was taken advantage of by someone

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<v Speaker 2>who was supposed to protect me. Like, I feel like

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<v Speaker 2>I honestly am okay with like telling my story, just

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<v Speaker 2>because it brings awareness to people who like could possibly

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<v Speaker 2>in you know, bringing situations like I what unfortunately was.

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<v Speaker 2>So I think I definitely come to terms and you know,

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<v Speaker 2>like healed from this.

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<v Speaker 1>And what about your sister, I think.

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<v Speaker 2>She like the same probably goes for her as well.

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<v Speaker 2>I think she's definitely less talkative about it because I

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<v Speaker 2>did tell her like that I was possibly going to

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<v Speaker 2>like call in and like share this, and she was

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<v Speaker 2>just like, you know, I support you, but I won't

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<v Speaker 2>want nothing to do.

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<v Speaker 1>With it basically. Okay, Yeah, Like did did you like,

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<v Speaker 1>was this something you like talked about a lot in

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<v Speaker 1>therapy or like had to kind of like what was

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<v Speaker 1>your way of like I guess, uh uh sort of

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<v Speaker 1>sort of dealing with this.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, So I did end up actually seeing a therapist

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<v Speaker 2>for like quite some time after like the whole situation,

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<v Speaker 2>and I like doro that I was like actually able

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<v Speaker 2>to like you know, really trying to take it to

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<v Speaker 2>court and whatnot. Because after I graduated, COVID shortly happened afterwards,

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<v Speaker 2>so like everything got really delayed life, Like I was,

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<v Speaker 2>I actually had the time to heal before having to

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<v Speaker 2>like legally deal with everything.

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<v Speaker 1>Mm hm.

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<v Speaker 2>So I definitely do think I had like time to like,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, cope with what sort of happened.

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<v Speaker 1>Was there a you said there was no trial and

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<v Speaker 1>he just kind of like pleaded guilty immediately?

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, he just pleaded guilty because like my sister and

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<v Speaker 2>I like didn't really feel comfortable with going to a trial,

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<v Speaker 2>and so like with the prosecutors, like I'm born to

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<v Speaker 2>lawyers of that son, he sort of, I guess like

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<v Speaker 2>jumped in a chance and said Hey, we'll sweet guilty

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<v Speaker 2>for like you know, less of sentence.

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<v Speaker 1>Mm hmmm mm hmm. So what is your life like now?

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<v Speaker 1>Are you in in college? Are you working?

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I'm currently in college. I'm currently working as well.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, so it's pretty good.

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<v Speaker 2>Honestly, it's it's really like I think I've definitely grown

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<v Speaker 2>and like completely changed since like that night. Oh I

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<v Speaker 2>didn't even tell you about how he tried to break in?

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<v Speaker 1>How did he try to break in?

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, so it was like a night of our senior

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<v Speaker 2>barbecue and like my sister and I like had went

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<v Speaker 2>out with like our friends like after like a night

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<v Speaker 2>of our senior barbecue, which he knew we would be

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<v Speaker 2>at the school for, and so we went up to

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<v Speaker 2>play this diner and then we get I'm getting weird

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<v Speaker 2>quick calls from him like constantly, but at this point

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<v Speaker 2>we're just ignoring him, like we're just trying to graduate.

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<v Speaker 2>And then we planned on like reporting everything because we

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<v Speaker 2>only were graduating in like two days. And so then

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<v Speaker 2>suddenly like we get a call from like our mom,

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<v Speaker 2>and my mom's just like, hey, like, are you guys

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<v Speaker 2>like downstairs? And at the time, like living in my

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<v Speaker 2>home was just like my mom, like my younger sister

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<v Speaker 2>and then my twin and I. But my twin and

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<v Speaker 2>I were out and so we were like no, like

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<v Speaker 2>we're at the diner or whatever, and she was just like, well,

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<v Speaker 2>like someone's trying to like like get inside the house.

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<v Speaker 2>And like Miko, which is like our dog at the time,

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<v Speaker 2>was like going crazy, like he keeps barkating growing, which

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<v Speaker 2>like never does and immediately like my guts these jobs,

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<v Speaker 2>Like I knailed it was him, Like he had to

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<v Speaker 2>like be trying to break into my home because like

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<v Speaker 2>he has made for us before like prior, and so

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<v Speaker 2>like we medi like a rush me like to like

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<v Speaker 2>my house. Like I'm trying to my mom like you know,

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<v Speaker 2>like lock the doors, like call the police to sound

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<v Speaker 2>the third and like she's generally confuted at this point

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<v Speaker 2>because like we haven't told like our family for anything.

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<v Speaker 2>And so then I finally get on the phone with

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<v Speaker 2>him and he's like just sounds super intoxicated. He's just

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<v Speaker 2>like I don't know why he won't talk to me,

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<v Speaker 2>Like I didn't have to come to this, and like

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<v Speaker 2>he's literally a beenning to like being outside of my

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<v Speaker 2>homes and whatnot. He's like describing my house like to me,

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<v Speaker 2>like Walt on the phone in the entire time, I'm

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<v Speaker 2>literally just like screaming like you know, like get the

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<v Speaker 2>fuck away from my house, like it's not okay. And

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<v Speaker 2>he got like my address obviously from being like you

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<v Speaker 2>know my teacher. Oh my god, you have a lot

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<v Speaker 2>of my personal information. Yeah, and then please tell me that.

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<v Speaker 1>Damn. So so he's so he's on probate, like is

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<v Speaker 1>he not? So he's just like he's like at his

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<v Speaker 1>house right now, like he's not.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, yes, I see.

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<v Speaker 1>Damn. I would assume there would be like pretty crazy

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<v Speaker 1>criminal charges for that.

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<v Speaker 2>No, yeah, absolutely, Like I would assume that as well.

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<v Speaker 2>I just think it was just because it was like

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<v Speaker 2>during COVID that like we felt so rushed almost to

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<v Speaker 2>get it over with and like no longer delay that

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<v Speaker 2>he just got up so easy.

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<v Speaker 1>In my opinion, how did does is that something that

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<v Speaker 1>like still upsets you or do you do you feel

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<v Speaker 1>like you're you're kind of you you've moved on.

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<v Speaker 4>I don't know.

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<v Speaker 2>I think overall like I've definitely moved on, But do

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<v Speaker 2>you think there are just stays where I'm feeling so

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<v Speaker 2>like mentally good and stuff and I'm like, damn, like

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<v Speaker 2>I could have actually probably faced him in court if

0:11:33.400 --> 0:11:35.240
<v Speaker 2>like I would have been like as muchure as I

0:11:35.280 --> 0:11:36.240
<v Speaker 2>am now like.

0:11:36.520 --> 0:11:43.200
<v Speaker 1>At that time, right right, Well, I'm glad to hear

0:11:43.520 --> 0:11:49.960
<v Speaker 1>that you you feel like you're you're doing well and

0:11:50.000 --> 0:11:53.080
<v Speaker 1>that you're comfortable enough to talk about that. I mean,

0:11:53.120 --> 0:11:56.640
<v Speaker 1>this is a totally fucked up story.

0:11:58.360 --> 0:12:01.760
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, no, it was totally fucked up. Definitely, absolutely, I

0:12:01.800 --> 0:12:06.120
<v Speaker 2>completely agree.

0:12:07.000 --> 0:12:11.440
<v Speaker 1>How does your sister what's what's like? What's her deal now?

0:12:11.520 --> 0:12:13.520
<v Speaker 1>Is she also in school and doing well?

0:12:14.160 --> 0:12:17.679
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, she's doing great. She's in like a fantastic committed relationship,

0:12:17.920 --> 0:12:20.360
<v Speaker 2>and she's suit the same guy that she was with

0:12:20.400 --> 0:12:22.480
<v Speaker 2>when this is happening. And like the teacher that we're

0:12:22.520 --> 0:12:26.160
<v Speaker 2>talking about pete another student to slash her boyfriend's tires

0:12:26.160 --> 0:12:27.439
<v Speaker 2>for seven hundred dollars.

0:12:28.520 --> 0:12:32.000
<v Speaker 1>He paid somebody to slash her boyfriend's tires.

0:12:32.440 --> 0:12:34.040
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, he paid another student.

0:12:38.720 --> 0:12:39.600
<v Speaker 1>That's crazy.

0:12:41.080 --> 0:12:44.440
<v Speaker 2>Yeah he didn't he was a gemini too, and like

0:12:44.640 --> 0:12:49.680
<v Speaker 2>ULTI mentally also, I don't know, he's definitely crazy.

0:12:49.960 --> 0:12:51.360
<v Speaker 1>What was what was this guy?

0:12:51.640 --> 0:12:51.720
<v Speaker 3>Like?

0:12:52.800 --> 0:12:53.720
<v Speaker 1>What did he teach?

0:12:55.360 --> 0:12:55.440
<v Speaker 4>So?

0:12:55.520 --> 0:12:59.760
<v Speaker 2>He talked algebra two? Like I said, like in the beginning,

0:12:59.840 --> 0:13:01.920
<v Speaker 2>like he seems like a normal, like you know, chill

0:13:02.080 --> 0:13:04.520
<v Speaker 2>younger teacher, you know in high school. Like this was

0:13:04.559 --> 0:13:06.680
<v Speaker 2>like younger teachers who try to like almost fit in

0:13:06.760 --> 0:13:07.319
<v Speaker 2>with the gudents.

0:13:07.360 --> 0:13:08.480
<v Speaker 4>Like he wasn't too much of.

0:13:08.480 --> 0:13:11.200
<v Speaker 2>That, but he also wasn't like super hard on us.

0:13:11.760 --> 0:13:12.120
<v Speaker 1>Uh huh.

0:13:12.120 --> 0:13:14.600
<v Speaker 2>Like he was definitely like a like a very relaxed

0:13:14.640 --> 0:13:16.760
<v Speaker 2>teacher I can say, and definitely across the line of

0:13:16.800 --> 0:13:22.720
<v Speaker 2>probably like appropriateness multiple times. But yeah, he taught algebra.

0:13:25.080 --> 0:13:30.320
<v Speaker 1>And like I guess in just like on a day

0:13:30.360 --> 0:13:35.040
<v Speaker 1>to day basis in class, like he just were there

0:13:35.080 --> 0:13:38.120
<v Speaker 1>was there anything like, well, I guess you already said

0:13:38.120 --> 0:13:39.520
<v Speaker 1>all the things I was gonna ask, like anything that

0:13:39.600 --> 0:13:43.920
<v Speaker 1>kind of tipped you off preemptively that he might be

0:13:44.160 --> 0:13:49.360
<v Speaker 1>uh you know, a fucking you know, doing weird shit.

0:13:51.080 --> 0:13:53.800
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, honestly, I definitely think there were like multiple things

0:13:53.800 --> 0:13:56.720
<v Speaker 2>Like perfect example, I really stuck at math, and like

0:13:57.240 --> 0:13:59.959
<v Speaker 2>I think towards closer when I started like closer when

0:14:00.040 --> 0:14:02.760
<v Speaker 2>I was training eighteen, I started noticing like my grade

0:14:02.800 --> 0:14:05.320
<v Speaker 2>picking up randomly, and I was just like, oh, like

0:14:05.400 --> 0:14:08.120
<v Speaker 2>that's weird, Like I don't think I got to like

0:14:08.200 --> 0:14:10.920
<v Speaker 2>that test questions right and stuff and like my answers

0:14:10.960 --> 0:14:13.760
<v Speaker 2>would be changed, like he essentially we later found out,

0:14:13.880 --> 0:14:16.400
<v Speaker 2>was like changing my grades like for the better. Actually,

0:14:19.480 --> 0:14:24.920
<v Speaker 2>so I guess like that was like something I could have. Yeah, yeah,

0:14:24.960 --> 0:14:25.320
<v Speaker 2>I don't know.

0:14:25.360 --> 0:14:27.640
<v Speaker 1>I really I don't know in this guy's mind, like

0:14:27.960 --> 0:14:33.200
<v Speaker 1>what like how he thought this would all go down?

0:14:35.440 --> 0:14:37.640
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I have no idea, to be honest with you,

0:14:37.880 --> 0:14:43.760
<v Speaker 2>like I think he is very delusional, uh huh, like

0:14:43.880 --> 0:14:46.120
<v Speaker 2>being very confident who was gonna get caught.

0:14:47.560 --> 0:14:50.520
<v Speaker 1>How did you feel like family react to all of this?

0:14:51.680 --> 0:14:54.640
<v Speaker 2>How did my family? So, Like my twin and I

0:14:54.640 --> 0:14:57.440
<v Speaker 2>are actually like the youngest of like a lot of girls,

0:14:57.760 --> 0:15:00.520
<v Speaker 2>like we have five sisters and all, so I feel

0:15:00.560 --> 0:15:02.360
<v Speaker 2>like when our older sisters found out, they were just

0:15:02.400 --> 0:15:04.920
<v Speaker 2>more so like, you know, in suprotective mode, like that

0:15:05.040 --> 0:15:07.080
<v Speaker 2>we're gonna find this guy, like we're gonna help you

0:15:07.120 --> 0:15:09.360
<v Speaker 2>do this and stuff like that. And so with my

0:15:09.440 --> 0:15:11.560
<v Speaker 2>mom and I think my parents were super like, you know,

0:15:11.800 --> 0:15:14.360
<v Speaker 2>we're gonna help you guys through this, like super supportive.

0:15:14.440 --> 0:15:17.200
<v Speaker 2>But at the time, like we really were just in

0:15:17.240 --> 0:15:18.840
<v Speaker 2>a place where we just wanted to ignore it and

0:15:18.880 --> 0:15:21.680
<v Speaker 2>pretend it didn't happen, Like we were still very much traumatized.

0:15:22.120 --> 0:15:24.120
<v Speaker 2>So I don't think we were appreciative of it like

0:15:25.400 --> 0:15:30.400
<v Speaker 2>as we are now like back then. So they definitely

0:15:30.480 --> 0:15:33.960
<v Speaker 2>were like you know, typical family, like trying to like

0:15:34.000 --> 0:15:38.120
<v Speaker 2>protect and you know, defend us.

0:15:38.800 --> 0:15:42.360
<v Speaker 1>Well, Leila, well listen, I'm glad it sounds like you're,

0:15:43.040 --> 0:15:47.240
<v Speaker 1>i mean, all this crazy shit, you know, withstanding, it

0:15:47.280 --> 0:15:52.640
<v Speaker 1>sounds like you're you're living life in good spirits. And

0:15:53.400 --> 0:15:57.160
<v Speaker 1>I'm happy to hear that you sound like you have

0:15:57.240 --> 0:16:01.600
<v Speaker 1>a you know, a good uh I guess as as

0:16:01.680 --> 0:16:03.920
<v Speaker 1>good of an attitude as you can about this whole thing.

0:16:05.960 --> 0:16:10.120
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I like to think, so thank you for recognizing that.

0:16:11.080 --> 0:16:13.440
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, for sure. I mean that's a tough thing to

0:16:13.480 --> 0:16:19.240
<v Speaker 1>do in the face of such a you know, crazy,

0:16:19.560 --> 0:16:24.680
<v Speaker 1>crazy situation. It's it's yeah, it's good to hear that

0:16:26.000 --> 0:16:31.280
<v Speaker 1>you and your sister are are you know, living living

0:16:31.320 --> 0:16:38.360
<v Speaker 1>good lives regardless, And yeah, I don't know. Is there

0:16:38.360 --> 0:16:44.440
<v Speaker 1>any other kind of aspect of this or anything else

0:16:44.560 --> 0:16:47.440
<v Speaker 1>that you you you want to say about it or

0:16:47.600 --> 0:16:51.000
<v Speaker 1>say to the people of the computer before we go.

0:16:52.920 --> 0:16:56.360
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I think first I will say, like if a

0:16:56.400 --> 0:16:59.560
<v Speaker 2>teacher or someone that you trust that older doing extra attention,

0:16:59.680 --> 0:17:03.800
<v Speaker 2>sometimes it's not good attention and it's hard to definitely

0:17:03.800 --> 0:17:06.800
<v Speaker 2>recognize when you're being groomed, but definitely try to be

0:17:06.800 --> 0:17:09.919
<v Speaker 2>on the lookout. Also, gak like I don't know who's

0:17:09.920 --> 0:17:12.200
<v Speaker 2>like picking the music for like the whole waiting room.

0:17:12.400 --> 0:17:14.760
<v Speaker 2>Nothing against it, but it was a little triggering. It

0:17:14.800 --> 0:17:16.600
<v Speaker 2>was super intense. You should probably ask me to like

0:17:16.680 --> 0:17:17.919
<v Speaker 2>low vibrational tunes.

0:17:18.920 --> 0:17:21.639
<v Speaker 1>You know, people, people listen people. People have told me

0:17:21.680 --> 0:17:24.680
<v Speaker 1>about the hold music for a while. And here's the thing,

0:17:24.880 --> 0:17:26.639
<v Speaker 1>I just I don't. I don't know how to change it.

0:17:26.760 --> 0:17:29.480
<v Speaker 1>I have no idea. I've I've looked at the settings page,

0:17:29.880 --> 0:17:32.840
<v Speaker 1>I've tried clicking and dragging things, or I have no

0:17:32.920 --> 0:17:35.760
<v Speaker 1>idea to I have no idea to change it. So

0:17:36.000 --> 0:17:41.639
<v Speaker 1>you know, I'm just I embraced that which I cannot change, Okay,

0:17:41.880 --> 0:17:42.760
<v Speaker 1>I can I can.

0:17:42.680 --> 0:17:46.320
<v Speaker 2>See why I can understand that, but I completely agree.

0:17:47.960 --> 0:17:50.639
<v Speaker 1>Well, thanks for sharing, Leila. Hope you just to continue

0:17:50.680 --> 0:17:54.200
<v Speaker 1>to do well and have a good night. Man.

0:17:55.560 --> 0:17:57.720
<v Speaker 2>Thank you so much for having me. Have a great night.

0:17:58.560 --> 0:17:59.280
<v Speaker 1>You two take care.

0:18:00.560 --> 0:18:00.960
<v Speaker 2>Heybye.

0:18:07.080 --> 0:18:10.360
<v Speaker 1>I don't I don't know if I have any post

0:18:10.440 --> 0:18:17.320
<v Speaker 1>call thoughts to that one. It was pretty crazy. I mean,

0:18:17.400 --> 0:18:19.640
<v Speaker 1>I I kind of said what I wanted to say.

0:18:19.680 --> 0:18:24.159
<v Speaker 1>It sounded like she had a good attitude towards it.

0:18:24.160 --> 0:18:29.160
<v Speaker 1>It's nice that she feels comfortable talking about it. I'm

0:18:29.160 --> 0:18:33.280
<v Speaker 1>glad that she's made that development. Fucking we're very strange.

0:18:33.800 --> 0:18:35.680
<v Speaker 1>I guess that's I don't know anything about the legal

0:18:35.680 --> 0:18:39.520
<v Speaker 1>system because I'm a guy in a gecko costume. But

0:18:39.600 --> 0:18:45.080
<v Speaker 1>it's very strange that that guy's not in jail. She

0:18:45.080 --> 0:18:48.840
<v Speaker 1>said he had five years probation. I'm also dumb and

0:18:48.880 --> 0:18:50.600
<v Speaker 1>don't really even know what that means. Does that mean

0:18:50.640 --> 0:18:54.520
<v Speaker 1>that like he's like, is he just like chilling? Like

0:18:54.640 --> 0:18:57.679
<v Speaker 1>is he allowed to go to the park and shit? Like,

0:18:58.800 --> 0:19:01.560
<v Speaker 1>what does that mean? Does he go to jail after

0:19:01.680 --> 0:19:06.520
<v Speaker 1>five years? I don't know. It's uh, that's weird to me.

0:19:07.520 --> 0:19:11.439
<v Speaker 1>But but anyway, I don't know. I get. All that

0:19:11.600 --> 0:19:18.520
<v Speaker 1>matters is that Uhlilah uh is doing good?

0:19:18.560 --> 0:19:18.800
<v Speaker 5>Now?

0:19:19.840 --> 0:19:25.760
<v Speaker 1>Hello, le Hi, how's it going? It's going good. What's

0:19:25.800 --> 0:19:28.879
<v Speaker 1>going on with you? Not much?

0:19:29.040 --> 0:19:30.480
<v Speaker 6>Just just hanging.

0:19:30.280 --> 0:19:37.160
<v Speaker 1>Out, Sean. It says here that, uh, there's a girl

0:19:37.200 --> 0:19:41.720
<v Speaker 1>at your work who makes out with dogs and you

0:19:42.080 --> 0:19:43.560
<v Speaker 1>and it makes you uncomfortable.

0:19:45.359 --> 0:19:48.080
<v Speaker 6>Very Yeah, it makes everybody uncomfortable pretty much.

0:19:48.160 --> 0:19:50.200
<v Speaker 1>All right, Tell me about that. Tell me about that.

0:19:51.760 --> 0:19:56.480
<v Speaker 6>Oh yeah, So we'll have like a little functions, like

0:19:56.560 --> 0:19:59.760
<v Speaker 6>work functions, and we'll hang out and stuff, and some

0:19:59.840 --> 0:20:03.600
<v Speaker 6>of the guys whom work will bring their dogs, and uh,

0:20:03.840 --> 0:20:08.480
<v Speaker 6>you know, everyone likes dogs. But she like will play

0:20:08.560 --> 0:20:11.840
<v Speaker 6>with them and they'll lick her face and she'll like

0:20:12.680 --> 0:20:14.080
<v Speaker 6>let them lick in her mouth.

0:20:15.320 --> 0:20:15.800
<v Speaker 1>Mm hmmm.

0:20:17.359 --> 0:20:20.679
<v Speaker 6>And then she'll she'll like suck their tongues and like

0:20:20.760 --> 0:20:29.280
<v Speaker 6>bite their tongues and they lips. Okay, well, I mean

0:20:29.400 --> 0:20:32.800
<v Speaker 6>they're dogs, you know, I guess, like, but like she

0:20:33.040 --> 0:20:35.040
<v Speaker 6>kind of like sees into it and it's kind of weird,

0:20:35.119 --> 0:20:35.360
<v Speaker 6>you know.

0:20:36.920 --> 0:20:37.000
<v Speaker 3>What.

0:20:37.160 --> 0:20:38.800
<v Speaker 1>And this is where do you work again?

0:20:41.520 --> 0:20:47.760
<v Speaker 6>I'm in like the military. But regardless, like all of

0:20:47.760 --> 0:20:49.679
<v Speaker 6>the families and stuff will bring their dogs, and she

0:20:49.840 --> 0:20:53.920
<v Speaker 6>just like any dogs, she'll like try and make.

0:20:53.760 --> 0:20:54.359
<v Speaker 4>Out with, you know.

0:20:55.440 --> 0:20:58.879
<v Speaker 1>Okay, And so she's like sucking on the dog tongue.

0:20:58.960 --> 0:21:02.600
<v Speaker 1>Is she like is she like licking the dogs? Is

0:21:02.600 --> 0:21:04.640
<v Speaker 1>it just the dog mouths and she's just making out

0:21:04.640 --> 0:21:08.200
<v Speaker 1>with them. She's not like touching the dog's penises and stuff.

0:21:09.000 --> 0:21:13.719
<v Speaker 6>No, No, I mean that's that I hope not at

0:21:13.800 --> 0:21:14.320
<v Speaker 6>least not.

0:21:14.320 --> 0:21:16.520
<v Speaker 1>What I I hope not too. That's why I'm asking.

0:21:17.960 --> 0:21:22.720
<v Speaker 6>Yeah, it's disgusting. But there's this like one specific like

0:21:22.800 --> 0:21:24.719
<v Speaker 6>story where like the dog kind of like freaked out

0:21:24.760 --> 0:21:27.320
<v Speaker 6>about it and didn't like bite her anything. But like

0:21:28.560 --> 0:21:31.080
<v Speaker 6>I heard one of my other coworkers say that, like

0:21:31.880 --> 0:21:36.199
<v Speaker 6>they were like the dog was like traumatized almost like

0:21:36.280 --> 0:21:39.719
<v Speaker 6>he like it was at his house and she was

0:21:39.760 --> 0:21:44.520
<v Speaker 6>doing her thing with the dog, and the dog like

0:21:45.119 --> 0:21:49.000
<v Speaker 6>ran away and like was like having the zuomies pretty much.

0:21:50.240 --> 0:21:52.919
<v Speaker 1>So she was she was making out with this dog,

0:21:53.080 --> 0:21:55.679
<v Speaker 1>and then the dog got scared and ran away, and

0:21:55.720 --> 0:21:56.959
<v Speaker 1>there was like dog trauma.

0:21:59.640 --> 0:22:00.840
<v Speaker 6>To me, that's what it sounded like.

0:22:00.960 --> 0:22:04.920
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, dude, I don't know. I have no fucking idea.

0:22:04.960 --> 0:22:07.400
<v Speaker 1>I don't know anything about dog psychology or like what

0:22:07.560 --> 0:22:12.600
<v Speaker 1>how dogs respond to you know, being Yeah, that's kissing.

0:22:13.000 --> 0:22:16.480
<v Speaker 6>Yeah, it kind of makes me wonder like if dogs

0:22:16.480 --> 0:22:20.320
<v Speaker 6>can speak, you know, like what would they like?

0:22:20.400 --> 0:22:22.720
<v Speaker 1>Well, you know, it's interesting and I just I just

0:22:22.800 --> 0:22:28.040
<v Speaker 1>realized this just now. Dogs don't even make out with

0:22:28.119 --> 0:22:32.080
<v Speaker 1>each other. Really. Animals don't really kiss each other on

0:22:32.119 --> 0:22:34.480
<v Speaker 1>the lips really like humans do, really do they?

0:22:35.359 --> 0:22:37.159
<v Speaker 6>No, that's true, I don't think so.

0:22:37.200 --> 0:22:39.320
<v Speaker 1>I've never seen that, so it's not a natural thing

0:22:39.359 --> 0:22:45.080
<v Speaker 1>for them.

0:22:42.400 --> 0:22:45.000
<v Speaker 6>Right, and this and this girl is kind of feeding

0:22:45.040 --> 0:22:49.320
<v Speaker 6>into like and feeding into that, you know, like dogs

0:22:49.359 --> 0:22:52.440
<v Speaker 6>like the licks because they like I think that's I

0:22:52.480 --> 0:22:54.119
<v Speaker 6>don't know, I don't know why they lick. It's kind

0:22:54.119 --> 0:22:59.959
<v Speaker 6>of weird, but it's it's another person looking or like

0:23:00.920 --> 0:23:05.960
<v Speaker 6>sucking a dog's tongue that has been eating shit, you know, Yeah,

0:23:06.160 --> 0:23:07.040
<v Speaker 6>like you don't know what they do.

0:23:08.320 --> 0:23:09.800
<v Speaker 1>Well, I mean you you could say that about making

0:23:09.840 --> 0:23:12.159
<v Speaker 1>out with a person too, you know.

0:23:12.640 --> 0:23:13.720
<v Speaker 2>That's that's true.

0:23:13.760 --> 0:23:15.000
<v Speaker 6>But I've never met her, like.

0:23:15.000 --> 0:23:18.160
<v Speaker 1>If like if like, if you get a hand job

0:23:18.200 --> 0:23:20.080
<v Speaker 1>from someone, you don't know where their hand has been,

0:23:20.240 --> 0:23:23.120
<v Speaker 1>like I've, I've I've there's been plenty of times where

0:23:23.119 --> 0:23:27.879
<v Speaker 1>I've gotten like shit on my hand. Yeah, just throughout

0:23:27.880 --> 0:23:30.359
<v Speaker 1>my life. I've never like gotten ship on my hand

0:23:32.200 --> 0:23:34.320
<v Speaker 1>and then like touched another person with my shi hand.

0:23:34.359 --> 0:23:37.640
<v Speaker 1>But throughout the you know, however many years my hand

0:23:37.640 --> 0:23:41.680
<v Speaker 1>has existed, there's been lots of shit on it. Right,

0:23:41.720 --> 0:23:44.000
<v Speaker 1>And that's true. That's true about most That's probably true

0:23:44.000 --> 0:23:47.000
<v Speaker 1>about a lot of people's hands. And yet you still like,

0:23:47.240 --> 0:23:51.639
<v Speaker 1>you know, shake everyone shake people's hands and get hand jobs.

0:23:51.680 --> 0:23:52.560
<v Speaker 1>And do all that stuff.

0:23:54.280 --> 0:23:56.399
<v Speaker 6>Yeah, so here's here's the thing about that is you

0:23:56.560 --> 0:23:59.600
<v Speaker 6>wash your hands, you know, dog do dog don't wash

0:23:59.640 --> 0:24:00.000
<v Speaker 6>their mouth.

0:24:00.680 --> 0:24:01.000
<v Speaker 1>They don't.

0:24:01.160 --> 0:24:03.840
<v Speaker 6>They don't like brush their own teeth, and they probably

0:24:03.880 --> 0:24:06.720
<v Speaker 6>like have that bacteria growing inside their mouths for who

0:24:06.760 --> 0:24:11.919
<v Speaker 6>knows how long before this girl comes along and starts

0:24:11.960 --> 0:24:13.120
<v Speaker 6>sucking on their mouths.

0:24:13.160 --> 0:24:16.679
<v Speaker 1>You know, you ever heard the thing where the dog's

0:24:16.720 --> 0:24:18.560
<v Speaker 1>mouth is cleaner than the humans?

0:24:20.080 --> 0:24:25.199
<v Speaker 6>That is what they say. Huh and thee though I

0:24:25.240 --> 0:24:30.480
<v Speaker 6>don't think it is, but I mean, what like dog

0:24:30.560 --> 0:24:31.800
<v Speaker 6>bread smells, you know.

0:24:33.320 --> 0:24:35.119
<v Speaker 1>Uh, So, are you gonna do anything about this or

0:24:35.119 --> 0:24:37.399
<v Speaker 1>are you just kind of you know, freaked out about it?

0:24:39.080 --> 0:24:40.960
<v Speaker 6>Kind of like brought it up to her. I was

0:24:40.960 --> 0:24:42.840
<v Speaker 6>like that it's kind of weird that you do that.

0:24:43.000 --> 0:24:50.040
<v Speaker 6>And she like defends herself. She's like, I'm just being playful.

0:24:50.080 --> 0:24:52.800
<v Speaker 6>They like it and and it's fun. Like they they're

0:24:52.840 --> 0:24:55.120
<v Speaker 6>they're they're just like they like it and they they're

0:24:55.160 --> 0:24:56.680
<v Speaker 6>being plainful. And I'm like, you don't know if they

0:24:56.720 --> 0:24:59.760
<v Speaker 6>like it or not. It's weird, Like you're making me uncomfortable.

0:24:59.760 --> 0:25:01.720
<v Speaker 6>It's not even her dogs. You know, she doesn't even

0:25:01.720 --> 0:25:02.800
<v Speaker 6>have dogs.

0:25:04.280 --> 0:25:09.240
<v Speaker 1>How do you how did how did the owners look

0:25:09.280 --> 0:25:12.240
<v Speaker 1>at her when when she's making out with their dogs?

0:25:13.960 --> 0:25:18.000
<v Speaker 6>Well, they they I don't know what they I don't

0:25:18.040 --> 0:25:20.160
<v Speaker 6>think they tell her to stop. They don't like tell

0:25:20.160 --> 0:25:23.240
<v Speaker 6>her to stop or anything. But because she's, like I

0:25:23.240 --> 0:25:26.879
<v Speaker 6>guess giving them like something to do, they're out of

0:25:26.920 --> 0:25:31.520
<v Speaker 6>their hair, you know, I guess. So if it was

0:25:31.600 --> 0:25:33.840
<v Speaker 6>my dog, I wouldn't let my dog around this person,

0:25:34.359 --> 0:25:34.959
<v Speaker 6>to be honest.

0:25:35.000 --> 0:25:38.320
<v Speaker 1>So so you're telling me that you believe that from

0:25:38.320 --> 0:25:42.480
<v Speaker 1>the owner's perspective, the owner is letting this girl make

0:25:42.560 --> 0:25:47.920
<v Speaker 1>out with their dog because it gives their dog something

0:25:47.960 --> 0:25:50.880
<v Speaker 1>to do, and then they don't have to watch their

0:25:50.920 --> 0:25:53.040
<v Speaker 1>dog because their dog is busy being made out with

0:25:53.640 --> 0:25:54.320
<v Speaker 1>by this woman.

0:25:56.080 --> 0:25:58.560
<v Speaker 6>Pretty much. I mean, I've I've talked to one of

0:25:58.600 --> 0:26:00.479
<v Speaker 6>them about it, because he was the one that told

0:26:00.520 --> 0:26:04.440
<v Speaker 6>me that story about his dog in the zoomis and

0:26:05.400 --> 0:26:10.160
<v Speaker 6>he pretty much like let the dog like run away,

0:26:10.200 --> 0:26:11.919
<v Speaker 6>and he like put it in the other room for

0:26:11.960 --> 0:26:15.560
<v Speaker 6>a while, and he said that it was weird. But she, like,

0:26:16.119 --> 0:26:19.159
<v Speaker 6>you know, she won't stop, like she don't think I

0:26:19.160 --> 0:26:21.159
<v Speaker 6>think that dog like is afraid of her now, is

0:26:21.200 --> 0:26:21.680
<v Speaker 6>what he said.

0:26:25.480 --> 0:26:26.880
<v Speaker 1>Well, Sean, is there anything else you want to say

0:26:26.880 --> 0:26:28.320
<v Speaker 1>to other people of the computer before we go.

0:26:32.920 --> 0:26:39.720
<v Speaker 6>Wash your hands, Uh, don't fuck other dogs' mouths, and

0:26:40.000 --> 0:26:40.720
<v Speaker 6>uh have a good.

0:26:40.680 --> 0:26:45.080
<v Speaker 1>Day, thanks for calling, of course, have a good one.

0:26:45.520 --> 0:26:47.800
<v Speaker 1>I was I have. This is fucked up, But you

0:26:47.880 --> 0:26:50.680
<v Speaker 1>know what, what is sad is that dog like if

0:26:50.680 --> 0:26:54.600
<v Speaker 1>I like, let's say you were a dog and you

0:26:55.600 --> 0:26:59.480
<v Speaker 1>really did want to make out with a human woman,

0:27:00.840 --> 0:27:03.119
<v Speaker 1>there would be no way for you to express that.

0:27:05.760 --> 0:27:08.640
<v Speaker 1>And so we don't know if dogs like making out

0:27:08.680 --> 0:27:14.439
<v Speaker 1>with people, but we still villainize it even though we

0:27:14.480 --> 0:27:18.760
<v Speaker 1>don't know if it's if they like it, which is what,

0:27:18.920 --> 0:27:22.000
<v Speaker 1>which is, by the way, the right move. I think

0:27:22.040 --> 0:27:23.560
<v Speaker 1>that's a good thing to do. I think we should

0:27:23.560 --> 0:27:28.280
<v Speaker 1>continue to villainize making out with dogs because scenario one,

0:27:29.440 --> 0:27:34.280
<v Speaker 1>dogs like making out with human people and we villainize it,

0:27:34.320 --> 0:27:35.879
<v Speaker 1>and the dogs are upset because they don't get to

0:27:35.880 --> 0:27:40.800
<v Speaker 1>make out with human people. Scenario two, the dogs don't

0:27:41.000 --> 0:27:46.199
<v Speaker 1>like making out with human women and we don't villainize it,

0:27:47.359 --> 0:27:49.959
<v Speaker 1>and then the dogs are you know, so I think

0:27:50.000 --> 0:27:52.200
<v Speaker 1>it's good that we villainize it. I think the risks

0:27:52.720 --> 0:28:00.040
<v Speaker 1>of not villainizing making out with dogs outweigh the the

0:28:00.800 --> 0:28:05.280
<v Speaker 1>pros of doing it. If that makes sense. Let's take

0:28:05.280 --> 0:28:15.000
<v Speaker 1>another call. Hello, Hello, Hi, oh Hi, what's up. What

0:28:15.000 --> 0:28:15.520
<v Speaker 1>are you doing?

0:28:17.480 --> 0:28:17.640
<v Speaker 4>Oh?

0:28:17.680 --> 0:28:21.040
<v Speaker 3>I'm just drinking and playing games like a loser.

0:28:23.440 --> 0:28:24.240
<v Speaker 1>What is your name?

0:28:26.280 --> 0:28:29.480
<v Speaker 4>Moss? It's not really my name, but I figure it'll work.

0:28:31.440 --> 0:28:33.520
<v Speaker 1>Moss. I have a fake name tip for you.

0:28:36.400 --> 0:28:36.760
<v Speaker 4>Okay.

0:28:37.400 --> 0:28:39.160
<v Speaker 1>The whole point of the fake name is that you

0:28:39.200 --> 0:28:41.520
<v Speaker 1>play it off like it's your real name. Actually, I

0:28:41.520 --> 0:28:45.240
<v Speaker 1>guess it's not necessarily true. I forget I said anything.

0:28:45.240 --> 0:28:46.360
<v Speaker 1>I don't know anything about anything.

0:28:46.400 --> 0:28:46.720
<v Speaker 5>I don't know.

0:28:48.240 --> 0:28:54.000
<v Speaker 1>I don't know shit. Uh okay, Okay, what's going on

0:28:54.040 --> 0:28:57.520
<v Speaker 1>with you today, Moss?

0:28:57.560 --> 0:29:02.680
<v Speaker 4>Just another day of you know, bomb, another day of

0:29:02.680 --> 0:29:04.920
<v Speaker 4>what being a bomb?

0:29:05.200 --> 0:29:10.600
<v Speaker 1>Just yeah, Well, Moss, it says here that you feel

0:29:10.640 --> 0:29:15.120
<v Speaker 1>as that you're addicted to buying a coworker, You have

0:29:15.160 --> 0:29:19.760
<v Speaker 1>a crush on stuff, and you you claim that you

0:29:19.800 --> 0:29:22.680
<v Speaker 1>have bought him at least three hundred dollars worth of stuff.

0:29:24.240 --> 0:29:27.760
<v Speaker 6>Yeah, yeah, that's that's true.

0:29:28.040 --> 0:29:31.440
<v Speaker 1>Okay. What kinds of stuff are you buying for for

0:29:31.480 --> 0:29:32.200
<v Speaker 1>this coworker?

0:29:34.000 --> 0:29:34.640
<v Speaker 4>Well, he's a.

0:29:34.680 --> 0:29:38.560
<v Speaker 3>Video game collector, so I'm getting him video game consoles,

0:29:40.040 --> 0:29:43.400
<v Speaker 3>games that are resold for a higher price at resale

0:29:43.440 --> 0:29:44.840
<v Speaker 3>shops that kind of thing.

0:29:44.920 --> 0:29:54.760
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, okay, and how has he been responding to these gifts?

0:29:56.120 --> 0:29:57.040
<v Speaker 4>Just verbal?

0:29:57.360 --> 0:30:01.680
<v Speaker 3>Hey thanks, maybe a pat on the shoulder, but uh,

0:30:01.800 --> 0:30:05.360
<v Speaker 3>nothing like physical and returned or anything like that.

0:30:06.440 --> 0:30:10.960
<v Speaker 1>Okay, why do you feel like you are buying him

0:30:11.000 --> 0:30:12.320
<v Speaker 1>these gifts?

0:30:13.640 --> 0:30:17.200
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, I'm worried that I'm like doing it to why

0:30:17.480 --> 0:30:21.680
<v Speaker 4>his affection when I also feel like I just enjoy

0:30:22.360 --> 0:30:26.120
<v Speaker 4>giving stuff, but my giving is targeted towards him.

0:30:25.960 --> 0:30:27.160
<v Speaker 3>And not just giving in general.

0:30:27.200 --> 0:30:30.680
<v Speaker 4>So that's why I feel like I'm it's more selfish

0:30:30.800 --> 0:30:33.360
<v Speaker 4>than anything altruistic.

0:30:34.840 --> 0:30:39.600
<v Speaker 1>Okay, you feel as though you're trying to buy his affection? Yeah,

0:30:39.800 --> 0:30:46.160
<v Speaker 1>is this something you've ever done in the past? I

0:30:46.680 --> 0:30:53.480
<v Speaker 1>think so, Okay, why do you feel like, you know,

0:30:53.480 --> 0:30:55.240
<v Speaker 1>if this is something you haven't done in the past,

0:30:55.280 --> 0:30:57.760
<v Speaker 1>why do you feel like, because you know, I assume

0:30:57.760 --> 0:30:59.840
<v Speaker 1>you've had crushes in the past, and you've looked, you know,

0:30:59.880 --> 0:31:02.800
<v Speaker 1>liked people in the past, why do you feel like,

0:31:04.120 --> 0:31:09.000
<v Speaker 1>all of a sudden, this is how you're you know,

0:31:09.800 --> 0:31:13.480
<v Speaker 1>responding to this crush.

0:31:13.960 --> 0:31:17.200
<v Speaker 3>Well, the thing is like, I've never really had a

0:31:17.280 --> 0:31:21.520
<v Speaker 3>crush before. I guess growing up, I'm like didn't really

0:31:21.560 --> 0:31:25.320
<v Speaker 3>seek a lot of connections with people, and then for

0:31:25.360 --> 0:31:27.720
<v Speaker 3>some reason late in college, I'm all of a sudden

0:31:28.320 --> 0:31:32.520
<v Speaker 3>like wanting to be friends and actually developed feelings for

0:31:32.640 --> 0:31:35.640
<v Speaker 3>other people. And I guess, since I have a lack

0:31:35.680 --> 0:31:40.040
<v Speaker 3>of experience with this whole crush thing, I'm just resorting

0:31:40.080 --> 0:31:45.840
<v Speaker 3>to the buy things way because that's all I know,

0:31:46.400 --> 0:31:46.880
<v Speaker 3>I guess.

0:31:49.240 --> 0:31:57.720
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, Okay, And uh, how like long have you been

0:31:57.720 --> 0:31:59.080
<v Speaker 1>buying some gifts for?

0:32:02.120 --> 0:32:05.520
<v Speaker 3>I say, since September, so a couple months.

0:32:05.240 --> 0:32:10.920
<v Speaker 1>Here, Okay, So I mean, aside from just buying gifts,

0:32:10.920 --> 0:32:14.640
<v Speaker 1>have you like told him that you like him and

0:32:14.720 --> 0:32:16.800
<v Speaker 1>asked him if he wants to go out with you

0:32:17.040 --> 0:32:23.040
<v Speaker 1>or or or made any kind of direct move? Uh

0:32:24.880 --> 0:32:25.200
<v Speaker 1>like this?

0:32:27.800 --> 0:32:30.640
<v Speaker 4>Well, we were having a conversation once and he said

0:32:30.760 --> 0:32:33.280
<v Speaker 4>he doesn't date coworkers, So I'm pretty sure that was

0:32:33.320 --> 0:32:34.920
<v Speaker 4>an indirect rejection.

0:32:35.920 --> 0:32:37.360
<v Speaker 3>Okay, at least that's how I took it.

0:32:38.000 --> 0:32:47.240
<v Speaker 1>Okay, M Why do you feel like buying him things

0:32:47.480 --> 0:32:48.880
<v Speaker 1>was the best way to get his attention?

0:32:52.320 --> 0:32:58.480
<v Speaker 3>Maybe I'm like insecure in my own personality to attract

0:32:58.560 --> 0:33:02.160
<v Speaker 3>him and get his attention, And that's fine.

0:33:02.160 --> 0:33:06.640
<v Speaker 4>It's just easier then, like the way to build a relationship.

0:33:06.720 --> 0:33:10.840
<v Speaker 4>I guess instead, of just talking in general, because I'm

0:33:10.880 --> 0:33:12.040
<v Speaker 4>not that good at talking either.

0:33:13.080 --> 0:33:16.000
<v Speaker 1>Have you ever had a boyfriend before or been in

0:33:16.040 --> 0:33:18.520
<v Speaker 1>a relationship? No?

0:33:19.320 --> 0:33:19.840
<v Speaker 4>Nice?

0:33:20.360 --> 0:33:24.280
<v Speaker 1>Okay, by the way, nothing wrong with that. Do you

0:33:24.360 --> 0:33:30.360
<v Speaker 1>have a lot of friends? No? Okay? Have you had

0:33:30.480 --> 0:33:34.600
<v Speaker 1>friends really much at all throughout your life?

0:33:36.480 --> 0:33:38.440
<v Speaker 4>A few in high school, but that's about it.

0:33:39.120 --> 0:33:41.719
<v Speaker 1>Okay. So you say that you feel like you're not

0:33:41.760 --> 0:33:49.600
<v Speaker 1>confident in yourself enough to sort of have a normal

0:33:49.640 --> 0:33:53.400
<v Speaker 1>conversation with this guy, and so you've kind of you

0:33:53.400 --> 0:33:56.640
<v Speaker 1>know that meme of like the kid who's walking up

0:33:56.640 --> 0:33:59.280
<v Speaker 1>steps and he just like takes his leg and puts

0:33:59.280 --> 0:34:01.960
<v Speaker 1>it like a a bunch of other steps. You're like

0:34:02.040 --> 0:34:04.640
<v Speaker 1>doing that but with buying gifts.

0:34:09.680 --> 0:34:10.960
<v Speaker 4>But what steps am I missing?

0:34:14.400 --> 0:34:17.000
<v Speaker 1>What steps are you missing? Well, let's let's go back

0:34:17.000 --> 0:34:22.719
<v Speaker 1>to this, like where do you feel as though you

0:34:22.840 --> 0:34:26.640
<v Speaker 1>are like in your mind? Where do you feel as

0:34:26.680 --> 0:34:34.240
<v Speaker 1>though you're you're lacking in your ability to have conversations

0:34:34.239 --> 0:34:34.920
<v Speaker 1>with other people?

0:34:35.000 --> 0:34:35.120
<v Speaker 3>Like?

0:34:35.160 --> 0:34:38.600
<v Speaker 1>What? What? What do you feel as insufficient about yourself

0:34:38.640 --> 0:34:40.359
<v Speaker 1>in your own mind?

0:34:42.600 --> 0:34:44.680
<v Speaker 4>I would say probably just talking in general.

0:34:44.840 --> 0:34:49.880
<v Speaker 3>I'm like, I mesh words together and improv is not

0:34:50.000 --> 0:34:52.080
<v Speaker 3>my thing. If I have to talk on the spot.

0:34:52.160 --> 0:34:53.520
<v Speaker 4>I just slimsy.

0:34:53.640 --> 0:34:56.319
<v Speaker 3>My words use a lot of filler and I'm not

0:34:56.520 --> 0:35:00.400
<v Speaker 3>very clear, So I just have bad speech skills.

0:35:00.080 --> 0:35:00.879
<v Speaker 2>I guess.

0:35:01.560 --> 0:35:01.960
<v Speaker 6>Mm hmm.

0:35:02.719 --> 0:35:05.239
<v Speaker 1>And has this been a thing for for a long time?

0:35:07.200 --> 0:35:08.879
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, mm hm.

0:35:12.360 --> 0:35:15.279
<v Speaker 1>Hmmm. Let me ask you a question, do you have

0:35:15.320 --> 0:35:16.040
<v Speaker 1>a real therapist?

0:35:18.200 --> 0:35:22.239
<v Speaker 4>I used to, but I didn't need to get back to.

0:35:23.760 --> 0:35:24.160
<v Speaker 3>Doing that.

0:35:25.160 --> 0:35:27.080
<v Speaker 1>When you brought this up with them, what kinds of

0:35:27.080 --> 0:35:27.960
<v Speaker 1>things would they tell you?

0:35:30.520 --> 0:35:32.640
<v Speaker 3>Oh, I haven't had a therapist in the hot minute now,

0:35:32.719 --> 0:35:35.120
<v Speaker 3>so I haven't talked to a professional about this.

0:35:36.239 --> 0:35:36.560
<v Speaker 6>M hm.

0:35:41.440 --> 0:35:44.799
<v Speaker 1>See, it's it's interesting and it's interesting to me too, because, like,

0:35:46.080 --> 0:35:50.040
<v Speaker 1>I mean, we're having a conversation right now, and you've

0:35:50.080 --> 0:35:52.560
<v Speaker 1>given me a lot of infom we we've I would

0:35:52.600 --> 0:35:57.359
<v Speaker 1>say you, this has been a successful conversation so far.

0:35:57.400 --> 0:36:00.319
<v Speaker 1>How in whatever rubric you would use, did you just

0:36:00.360 --> 0:36:05.440
<v Speaker 1>success of a conversation? And you say you're not good

0:36:05.480 --> 0:36:07.800
<v Speaker 1>at improv you're not good at expressing yourself, but yet

0:36:08.360 --> 0:36:12.960
<v Speaker 1>you have been able to express yourself pretty well over

0:36:13.000 --> 0:36:15.759
<v Speaker 1>the course of our conversation. And so it's kind of

0:36:15.760 --> 0:36:19.279
<v Speaker 1>making me think, like, there's this weird thing and I

0:36:19.360 --> 0:36:23.680
<v Speaker 1>fall victim to it too. Where you like build up

0:36:23.760 --> 0:36:28.680
<v Speaker 1>these uh I think they're called schemas in your mind

0:36:28.840 --> 0:36:32.279
<v Speaker 1>about yourself. You know, shit like I'm not good at

0:36:32.280 --> 0:36:34.600
<v Speaker 1>talking to people, or I'm not good at this, or

0:36:35.040 --> 0:36:37.400
<v Speaker 1>or even I am good at this and whatnot. And

0:36:37.440 --> 0:36:46.319
<v Speaker 1>then like your reality and your schemas of yourself or no,

0:36:46.480 --> 0:36:52.719
<v Speaker 1>those schemas they blind you from reality. So because you've

0:36:52.760 --> 0:36:57.239
<v Speaker 1>built up in your head, perhaps over the course of

0:36:57.440 --> 0:37:03.520
<v Speaker 1>several years, this idea of who you are and how

0:37:03.560 --> 0:37:10.239
<v Speaker 1>you act your your it like blinds you to any

0:37:10.280 --> 0:37:14.400
<v Speaker 1>kind of reality that people who are just meeting you

0:37:14.520 --> 0:37:18.680
<v Speaker 1>for the first time, they don't see you through the

0:37:18.760 --> 0:37:22.680
<v Speaker 1>lens of the ideas that you've built up about yourself,

0:37:23.800 --> 0:37:25.680
<v Speaker 1>and so they don't look at you and go, this

0:37:25.760 --> 0:37:30.319
<v Speaker 1>person hasn't it not to talk? You know, they see

0:37:30.360 --> 0:37:35.440
<v Speaker 1>you for, in a sense, what you are. And so

0:37:36.640 --> 0:37:41.520
<v Speaker 1>the process of getting you to see yourself as what

0:37:41.560 --> 0:37:47.120
<v Speaker 1>you are is a law. It becomes a long and

0:37:47.239 --> 0:37:51.920
<v Speaker 1>arduous one because you're unraveling years and years and years

0:37:52.520 --> 0:37:56.640
<v Speaker 1>of ideas that you've built up about yourself. We're obviously

0:37:56.640 --> 0:37:58.520
<v Speaker 1>not gonna be able to do that over the course

0:37:58.560 --> 0:38:00.880
<v Speaker 1>of this call. Because I am a real therapist I'm

0:38:00.880 --> 0:38:04.360
<v Speaker 1>a guy in a gecko costume and be you know,

0:38:04.440 --> 0:38:07.760
<v Speaker 1>it sounds like you spent many years, you know, building

0:38:07.840 --> 0:38:12.239
<v Speaker 1>up this this image of yourself, And so I think

0:38:12.360 --> 0:38:21.279
<v Speaker 1>that the goal then becomes, how do we remove this

0:38:21.360 --> 0:38:25.040
<v Speaker 1>negative image you have of yourself and then replace it

0:38:25.120 --> 0:38:29.000
<v Speaker 1>with a more positive one. And I don't know, that's

0:38:29.040 --> 0:38:30.560
<v Speaker 1>probably some of the ship that they teach you in

0:38:30.600 --> 0:38:32.399
<v Speaker 1>that school where they like, you know, teach you shit

0:38:32.440 --> 0:38:36.600
<v Speaker 1>about how that kind of be a real therapist. But

0:38:36.680 --> 0:38:42.000
<v Speaker 1>I guess I would say, like if you can think, if, if, if,

0:38:42.080 --> 0:38:46.040
<v Speaker 1>if there could be one central thought that you have

0:38:46.960 --> 0:38:49.680
<v Speaker 1>that you know, hopefully you walk away from this from

0:38:50.440 --> 0:38:57.400
<v Speaker 1>you walk away from this with, is that you, even

0:38:57.440 --> 0:39:03.799
<v Speaker 1>though it's weird, even though you know yourself more intimately

0:39:04.280 --> 0:39:12.560
<v Speaker 1>than anyone else does, you can't always trust your own

0:39:12.600 --> 0:39:17.000
<v Speaker 1>image of yourself. So when you think of yourself as

0:39:17.040 --> 0:39:21.960
<v Speaker 1>being unable to talk to people, or of being awkward,

0:39:22.160 --> 0:39:27.280
<v Speaker 1>or of being any of these things, you can't trust

0:39:27.320 --> 0:39:30.960
<v Speaker 1>those thoughts. And then when you do trust those thoughts,

0:39:31.120 --> 0:39:34.440
<v Speaker 1>they also become like these self fulfilling prophecies. You think

0:39:34.480 --> 0:39:38.400
<v Speaker 1>of yourself as these things, and then you become those things.

0:39:39.400 --> 0:39:42.719
<v Speaker 1>But if you stopped at the beginning, and you didn't

0:39:42.719 --> 0:39:47.080
<v Speaker 1>trust these thoughts that you had of yourself. Then you

0:39:47.920 --> 0:39:55.120
<v Speaker 1>become this new thing, this blank slate that can be

0:39:55.200 --> 0:40:01.080
<v Speaker 1>written in any way that you choose. So I don't know,

0:40:02.280 --> 0:40:06.120
<v Speaker 1>think about think about that. I guess instead of buying

0:40:06.120 --> 0:40:13.239
<v Speaker 1>this guy in Xbox by yourself, a goddamn xbox, you

0:40:13.360 --> 0:40:18.560
<v Speaker 1>deserve it. And you know, another thing is like, can

0:40:18.600 --> 0:40:20.959
<v Speaker 1>I tell you just one one more thing? Even if

0:40:23.200 --> 0:40:25.239
<v Speaker 1>this is something I've talked about in this podcast a lot,

0:40:26.160 --> 0:40:30.040
<v Speaker 1>I haven't talked I haven't been streaming for uh many

0:40:30.080 --> 0:40:33.399
<v Speaker 1>times for many weeks, so I've forgotten about all this shit.

0:40:34.040 --> 0:40:38.360
<v Speaker 1>But see, the thing is is that when it comes

0:40:38.400 --> 0:40:47.759
<v Speaker 1>to matters like these, even if you could successfully purchase

0:40:49.680 --> 0:40:53.919
<v Speaker 1>via ataris wait, he says he likes retro stuff. Via

0:40:55.360 --> 0:41:00.319
<v Speaker 1>ataris this man's affection, it would be worthless to you.

0:41:01.880 --> 0:41:06.319
<v Speaker 1>In fact, everyone's validation of you, good or bad, by

0:41:06.360 --> 0:41:14.399
<v Speaker 1>the way, is a worthless thing, because it's it's they're

0:41:14.440 --> 0:41:18.279
<v Speaker 1>the They're un there. They're in the in.

0:41:18.280 --> 0:41:27.040
<v Speaker 5>The building of the foundation of your image of yourself,

0:41:29.040 --> 0:41:31.719
<v Speaker 5>other people's ideas of you.

0:41:33.200 --> 0:41:38.360
<v Speaker 1>They're bricks made out of sand. They they work for

0:41:38.480 --> 0:41:42.680
<v Speaker 1>a little bit, but they're ultimately unsustainable to building a

0:41:43.760 --> 0:41:49.200
<v Speaker 1>solid foundation, whether they're good or bad, So don't trust

0:41:49.200 --> 0:41:59.879
<v Speaker 1>them and try to, you know, build something from within.

0:42:02.080 --> 0:42:05.480
<v Speaker 1>What do you think about all of that? What's your

0:42:05.560 --> 0:42:11.280
<v Speaker 1>name again? Mass? What do you think about all that? Mass?

0:42:12.280 --> 0:42:15.520
<v Speaker 4>It is definitely arguous, a long path, and.

0:42:15.760 --> 0:42:18.560
<v Speaker 3>Sometimes I resort to the easier way of, oh, I

0:42:18.680 --> 0:42:22.400
<v Speaker 3>just take myself. I don't deserve a chance to love myself,

0:42:22.440 --> 0:42:28.000
<v Speaker 3>but it is definitely worth building a clean slate for

0:42:28.120 --> 0:42:32.000
<v Speaker 3>myself and getting value through me instead of other people,

0:42:32.200 --> 0:42:35.840
<v Speaker 3>especially through externals.

0:42:37.200 --> 0:42:49.080
<v Speaker 1>Mm hmm, yeah. Yeah. And if I don't, don't beat

0:42:49.080 --> 0:42:54.440
<v Speaker 1>yourself up for you know, this whole buying, this whole whatever,

0:42:54.880 --> 0:42:57.279
<v Speaker 1>because what I don't, what I don't want you to do,

0:42:58.200 --> 0:43:04.600
<v Speaker 1>is be like, oh, I'm a fucking you know, loser.

0:43:04.640 --> 0:43:06.560
<v Speaker 1>I spent all this money about it, because you're not

0:43:06.560 --> 0:43:12.799
<v Speaker 1>gonna get anywhere doing that, you know, don't, don't. Don't.

0:43:12.920 --> 0:43:16.400
<v Speaker 1>The process of doing all this ship that we just

0:43:16.440 --> 0:43:19.840
<v Speaker 1>talked about is one that a lot of people are

0:43:19.880 --> 0:43:23.040
<v Speaker 1>going through and they make a lot of mistakes. So,

0:43:23.520 --> 0:43:25.360
<v Speaker 1>you know, don't beat yourself up for any mistakes you

0:43:25.440 --> 0:43:36.919
<v Speaker 1>make along the way, including buying some guy an xbox, Moss,

0:43:36.960 --> 0:43:38.000
<v Speaker 1>is there anything else you want to say to the

0:43:38.040 --> 0:43:41.360
<v Speaker 1>people the computer before you go? Uh?

0:43:41.480 --> 0:43:43.320
<v Speaker 3>Well, I hope you had a good time in Japan,

0:43:43.920 --> 0:43:47.520
<v Speaker 3>and uh I did all you people out there? I

0:43:47.520 --> 0:43:51.200
<v Speaker 3>guess if you're gonna buy some dude to PlayStation, buy

0:43:51.239 --> 0:43:53.280
<v Speaker 3>yourself a PlayStation, buy.

0:43:53.160 --> 0:43:57.960
<v Speaker 1>Yourself a PlayStation. I like that. This episode is sponsored

0:43:57.960 --> 0:44:04.759
<v Speaker 1>by UH buy Nothing. Thank you for calling Moss, Yeah,

0:44:04.880 --> 0:44:10.239
<v Speaker 1>thank you for your time. Hello, Hi, Hi, how are

0:44:10.280 --> 0:44:12.360
<v Speaker 1>you doing doing all right? How are you.

0:44:14.400 --> 0:44:15.000
<v Speaker 7>Doing all right?

0:44:15.040 --> 0:44:15.239
<v Speaker 1>Well?

0:44:15.440 --> 0:44:15.839
<v Speaker 7>Not really?

0:44:15.880 --> 0:44:17.759
<v Speaker 1>But why why?

0:44:17.800 --> 0:44:17.920
<v Speaker 3>Not?

0:44:17.960 --> 0:44:18.200
<v Speaker 1>Really?

0:44:21.400 --> 0:44:24.040
<v Speaker 7>So it's not like I just figured this out, but

0:44:24.280 --> 0:44:27.160
<v Speaker 7>for my whole life, I've figured out that I've been

0:44:27.560 --> 0:44:28.680
<v Speaker 7>extremely hateful.

0:44:30.280 --> 0:44:31.320
<v Speaker 3>What do you like?

0:44:32.840 --> 0:44:33.720
<v Speaker 7>I'm sorry? Good?

0:44:33.960 --> 0:44:35.560
<v Speaker 1>No, no, you please go ahead give me the top

0:44:35.560 --> 0:44:38.080
<v Speaker 1>line of of why you feel like you are you

0:44:38.080 --> 0:44:38.640
<v Speaker 1>are hateful?

0:44:41.880 --> 0:44:44.000
<v Speaker 7>Well, I can give you a good example for today.

0:44:45.160 --> 0:44:49.279
<v Speaker 7>I came home. Something else happened that I you know,

0:44:49.360 --> 0:44:52.399
<v Speaker 7>I'll probably go into but I came home. My mom

0:44:52.440 --> 0:44:55.000
<v Speaker 7>asked me out of my parents are twenty six? Uh

0:44:55.560 --> 0:44:58.400
<v Speaker 7>mom asked me, hey, you know, do you want any dinner?

0:44:59.160 --> 0:45:05.640
<v Speaker 7>And I appreci needed to basically tell her that I don't.

0:45:06.239 --> 0:45:09.200
<v Speaker 7>I don't want anything and just sort of of fuck off.

0:45:10.640 --> 0:45:14.080
<v Speaker 1>Okay, so your mom, you came home, your mom asked

0:45:14.080 --> 0:45:16.200
<v Speaker 1>you if you want any food, and then you told

0:45:16.239 --> 0:45:21.920
<v Speaker 1>her to fuck off? Oh yeah, okay, yeah, okay, So

0:45:22.000 --> 0:45:26.880
<v Speaker 1>in that moment, what do you feel like was compelling

0:45:26.960 --> 0:45:31.799
<v Speaker 1>your anger? Because I mean, this is like maybe cliche shit,

0:45:31.920 --> 0:45:34.760
<v Speaker 1>but I think we both know that in that moment,

0:45:35.280 --> 0:45:43.480
<v Speaker 1>you are not actually upset at your mom, but like

0:45:43.640 --> 0:45:50.280
<v Speaker 1>you're upset something else and you have this like opportunity

0:45:50.640 --> 0:45:53.520
<v Speaker 1>to unleash the anger. It's like you're taking your shit

0:45:54.920 --> 0:45:56.160
<v Speaker 1>and you're not going to hold it in, and you

0:45:56.239 --> 0:45:59.200
<v Speaker 1>finally let it out and you diarrhea on your mom.

0:46:00.320 --> 0:46:02.799
<v Speaker 1>Why do you what made you want to diarrhea on

0:46:02.840 --> 0:46:07.760
<v Speaker 1>your mom?

0:46:08.560 --> 0:46:12.600
<v Speaker 7>Basically come to the realization that just a piece of shit.

0:46:13.400 --> 0:46:17.319
<v Speaker 7>Now i'd say that because well you know that was

0:46:17.320 --> 0:46:20.839
<v Speaker 7>a good reason, but that it was not the first

0:46:20.880 --> 0:46:27.239
<v Speaker 7>time Okay, it happened for the past in six seven years.

0:46:27.640 --> 0:46:34.319
<v Speaker 1>Okay, Well before you just say you're a piece of shit,

0:46:34.920 --> 0:46:37.080
<v Speaker 1>I mean it's not with you know, I just want

0:46:37.080 --> 0:46:43.359
<v Speaker 1>you to recognize that, however true or false, you may

0:46:43.400 --> 0:46:49.160
<v Speaker 1>feel like that is it. It is unhelpful information, Some

0:46:49.320 --> 0:46:53.719
<v Speaker 1>unhelpful declaration because we can't go anywhere from it. You're

0:46:53.760 --> 0:46:56.640
<v Speaker 1>a piece of shit, okay, now what You're just a

0:46:56.640 --> 0:47:00.520
<v Speaker 1>piece of shit forever and ever. There's no way for

0:47:00.600 --> 0:47:02.920
<v Speaker 1>you to, you know, start living your life better or

0:47:02.960 --> 0:47:06.000
<v Speaker 1>anything like that. So you know, let's not throw ourselves

0:47:06.040 --> 0:47:08.319
<v Speaker 1>into a dead end by just saying you're a piece

0:47:08.320 --> 0:47:13.160
<v Speaker 1>of ship. So tell me, and we don't. We're not

0:47:13.200 --> 0:47:17.720
<v Speaker 1>going to get into all seven years of this right now,

0:47:18.400 --> 0:47:22.880
<v Speaker 1>but tell me just today, in that moment when you

0:47:22.960 --> 0:47:28.359
<v Speaker 1>were yelling at your mom, what was compelling you to

0:47:28.440 --> 0:47:28.719
<v Speaker 1>do that?

0:47:32.440 --> 0:47:35.880
<v Speaker 7>So I've been in this relationship with this girl for

0:47:36.120 --> 0:47:42.160
<v Speaker 7>really long, and within that time and before it, I

0:47:42.320 --> 0:47:44.520
<v Speaker 7>used to be even worse and I will manage to

0:47:44.520 --> 0:47:48.920
<v Speaker 7>work myself to be better. But I was doing it

0:47:49.000 --> 0:47:53.399
<v Speaker 7>everywhere else except for in the relationship, okay, and then

0:47:53.480 --> 0:47:59.480
<v Speaker 7>today I in a ten minute phone call, I managed

0:47:59.520 --> 0:48:05.320
<v Speaker 7>to completely just destroy it and end it. And that,

0:48:06.000 --> 0:48:10.279
<v Speaker 7>you know, it is probably why I had diarrhea on

0:48:10.360 --> 0:48:13.400
<v Speaker 7>my mom.

0:48:13.520 --> 0:48:18.520
<v Speaker 1>So you were taking out anger from that relationship ending

0:48:19.560 --> 0:48:28.239
<v Speaker 1>on your mom. Yes, okay, let me ask you a

0:48:28.320 --> 0:48:33.359
<v Speaker 1>quick question. Have you been to real therapy to talk

0:48:33.360 --> 0:48:33.719
<v Speaker 1>about this?

0:48:35.840 --> 0:48:42.240
<v Speaker 7>I have so back back in elementary I used to

0:48:42.280 --> 0:48:45.000
<v Speaker 7>bully people so hard that they forced me to go

0:48:45.080 --> 0:48:45.680
<v Speaker 7>into therapy.

0:48:46.360 --> 0:48:52.000
<v Speaker 1>Okay, and this was back in elementary school. Is this

0:48:52.200 --> 0:48:57.560
<v Speaker 1>I mean, you're what twenty six now, I'm twenty six now, yeah, okay?

0:48:57.600 --> 0:48:59.040
<v Speaker 1>And are you in therapy as an adult?

0:49:00.960 --> 0:49:01.919
<v Speaker 7>As an adult now?

0:49:02.800 --> 0:49:06.799
<v Speaker 1>Okay? Have you ever been in a situation where you've

0:49:06.800 --> 0:49:08.680
<v Speaker 1>talked to a real therapist about this issue?

0:49:10.560 --> 0:49:13.040
<v Speaker 7>M this specific issue? Now?

0:49:13.840 --> 0:49:17.120
<v Speaker 1>Okay, I'm gonna I'm gonna tell you this because I've

0:49:17.120 --> 0:49:18.560
<v Speaker 1>been thinking about this and I've been try to be

0:49:18.600 --> 0:49:24.160
<v Speaker 1>more respond responsible. I I'm definitely down to talk to

0:49:24.200 --> 0:49:27.120
<v Speaker 1>you about this issue. I don't know what's up, but

0:49:27.160 --> 0:49:28.839
<v Speaker 1>you should go to a real therapist to talk about

0:49:28.880 --> 0:49:33.719
<v Speaker 1>this after we talk, because it sounds like you might

0:49:33.760 --> 0:49:36.239
<v Speaker 1>have and I'm not gonna I don't know. I'm a

0:49:36.239 --> 0:49:38.480
<v Speaker 1>guy in a costume on the internet, but you might

0:49:38.520 --> 0:49:43.040
<v Speaker 1>have some you know, genuine personality disorder. If this has

0:49:43.080 --> 0:49:46.000
<v Speaker 1>been a thing that's been persisting, I'm not the guy

0:49:46.000 --> 0:49:48.560
<v Speaker 1>who's gonna be able to tell you that definitively, so

0:49:49.640 --> 0:49:52.920
<v Speaker 1>I think you should figure that out. But okay, that aside,

0:49:56.680 --> 0:49:58.040
<v Speaker 1>So he said this has been a thing for the

0:49:58.080 --> 0:49:59.200
<v Speaker 1>past seven years.

0:50:02.000 --> 0:50:05.360
<v Speaker 7>Yes, it's it's it's scaled up in the past seven years,

0:50:06.000 --> 0:50:08.520
<v Speaker 7>not like super extreme, but noticeably.

0:50:09.239 --> 0:50:19.480
<v Speaker 1>Okay, you told me just now you were like this.

0:50:19.680 --> 0:50:22.279
<v Speaker 1>You said this was something you've been working on and

0:50:22.320 --> 0:50:24.440
<v Speaker 1>that you were able to kind of improve it in

0:50:24.480 --> 0:50:27.200
<v Speaker 1>every aspect of your life except for in your relationship.

0:50:28.120 --> 0:50:35.919
<v Speaker 1>Is that what you said? Okay, yeah, tell me what

0:50:35.960 --> 0:50:37.040
<v Speaker 1>that improvement looked like.

0:50:39.800 --> 0:50:43.000
<v Speaker 7>Uh, the improvement looked like going into work, creating a

0:50:43.160 --> 0:50:47.400
<v Speaker 7>good relationship with everybody there. Uh. You know, when I

0:50:47.400 --> 0:50:50.480
<v Speaker 7>make a mistake at work, I wasn't you know, getting

0:50:50.480 --> 0:50:53.200
<v Speaker 7>mad at myself and you know, basically getting angry in

0:50:53.239 --> 0:51:00.480
<v Speaker 7>the corner. I was able to, like normal citizens around

0:51:00.680 --> 0:51:03.920
<v Speaker 7>where I live. I was able to establish good relationships

0:51:04.040 --> 0:51:07.719
<v Speaker 7>with them, you know, even in driving, like people you know,

0:51:07.760 --> 0:51:10.480
<v Speaker 7>tending to get real bridge a lot, and I had

0:51:10.520 --> 0:51:16.040
<v Speaker 7>completely cut that out. What else.

0:51:19.480 --> 0:51:19.640
<v Speaker 4>I mean?

0:51:19.760 --> 0:51:22.480
<v Speaker 7>Meanly, all I can say is just the interactions I

0:51:22.520 --> 0:51:27.359
<v Speaker 7>have with other people have improved. Would I say that

0:51:27.640 --> 0:51:31.960
<v Speaker 7>it improved in my home? Maybe for a couple of years.

0:51:32.480 --> 0:51:36.920
<v Speaker 1>Okay, So if you get granular with me for a second,

0:51:37.520 --> 0:51:39.760
<v Speaker 1>you say that the relationships you have with other people

0:51:39.920 --> 0:51:44.560
<v Speaker 1>just strangers, not necessarily people. You have intimate relationships with

0:51:44.640 --> 0:51:47.399
<v Speaker 1>like like people you have romantic relationships with, or your

0:51:47.400 --> 0:51:51.600
<v Speaker 1>family or your friends, but just like starting with folks

0:51:51.600 --> 0:51:54.360
<v Speaker 1>you encounter around town and you say the relationships have

0:51:54.360 --> 0:51:57.120
<v Speaker 1>gotten better, Like, can I get like specific details of

0:51:57.160 --> 0:51:58.759
<v Speaker 1>ways in which you feel like they've gotten better?

0:52:01.160 --> 0:52:05.200
<v Speaker 7>Okay, So there was a guy down the block for

0:52:05.360 --> 0:52:09.040
<v Speaker 7>me and I used to hang out with this this

0:52:09.480 --> 0:52:13.080
<v Speaker 7>I don't know what you want to call him a hooligan, okay,

0:52:13.200 --> 0:52:17.719
<v Speaker 7>you know he was affiliated with people. And I was

0:52:17.800 --> 0:52:20.800
<v Speaker 7>on my large dirt bike riding around town on the street.

0:52:21.320 --> 0:52:23.560
<v Speaker 7>Now I didn't have a license play on or anything.

0:52:24.080 --> 0:52:29.040
<v Speaker 7>And my folgan friend was on a small mop head

0:52:29.480 --> 0:52:31.560
<v Speaker 7>and the guy down the street came over to my

0:52:31.640 --> 0:52:35.040
<v Speaker 7>house because he saw us riding and was basically yelling

0:52:36.040 --> 0:52:39.279
<v Speaker 7>at my dad because of what he was writing and

0:52:39.360 --> 0:52:43.360
<v Speaker 7>not what I was writing. And we were basically able to,

0:52:44.520 --> 0:52:46.200
<v Speaker 7>you know, calm him down and say, hey, you know,

0:52:46.280 --> 0:52:49.160
<v Speaker 7>I'm sorry for doing that. You know, I know what's wrong.

0:52:49.200 --> 0:52:52.880
<v Speaker 7>I don't have a license for it. And then after

0:52:53.800 --> 0:52:56.880
<v Speaker 7>after that, you know, I used to I would go

0:52:56.920 --> 0:52:58.680
<v Speaker 7>over to his house and help him with like yard work,

0:52:59.400 --> 0:53:03.239
<v Speaker 7>you help him fix his house, you know, my my

0:53:03.320 --> 0:53:05.080
<v Speaker 7>parents would would make food for me to take over

0:53:05.160 --> 0:53:10.000
<v Speaker 7>to them, and kind of didn't. It kind of went

0:53:10.080 --> 0:53:14.799
<v Speaker 7>from I mean even before that, you know, we were

0:53:15.040 --> 0:53:20.440
<v Speaker 7>we're reckless around town, and even before that, uh, it

0:53:20.520 --> 0:53:21.919
<v Speaker 7>wasn't Okay, you.

0:53:21.960 --> 0:53:23.680
<v Speaker 1>Do you still have Do you still hang out with

0:53:23.719 --> 0:53:27.400
<v Speaker 1>this uh as you describe him hooligan friend?

0:53:29.120 --> 0:53:30.560
<v Speaker 7>No, he is in jail.

0:53:31.360 --> 0:53:42.799
<v Speaker 1>Okay, See what's your name, Charles? What else does your

0:53:42.840 --> 0:53:43.600
<v Speaker 1>life look like?

0:53:43.800 --> 0:53:44.000
<v Speaker 4>Now?

0:53:44.000 --> 0:53:45.600
<v Speaker 1>What do you What do you do for work?

0:53:48.239 --> 0:53:48.399
<v Speaker 4>So?

0:53:48.640 --> 0:53:50.200
<v Speaker 7>What I do for work right now? Is I work

0:53:50.280 --> 0:53:54.800
<v Speaker 7>as a machinist at a yacht a fishing yacht manufacturer.

0:53:55.480 --> 0:54:00.480
<v Speaker 1>Okay? Are you happy doing that? Mm?

0:54:01.400 --> 0:54:05.040
<v Speaker 7>It's it's easy work because I know it, but it's

0:54:05.239 --> 0:54:07.520
<v Speaker 7>not paying me very nicely.

0:54:08.600 --> 0:54:11.800
<v Speaker 1>Do you have an idea, even it's hard to get

0:54:12.360 --> 0:54:15.279
<v Speaker 1>the full picture, but an idea of what you think

0:54:15.320 --> 0:54:18.879
<v Speaker 1>would make you feel more fulfilled or happy in life?

0:54:21.680 --> 0:54:24.840
<v Speaker 7>I think I got to put myself in a situation

0:54:24.920 --> 0:54:28.400
<v Speaker 7>where I have to only depend on myself and not

0:54:28.640 --> 0:54:32.560
<v Speaker 7>come home to two people that are ready to basically

0:54:32.760 --> 0:54:33.200
<v Speaker 7>serve me.

0:54:34.920 --> 0:54:35.480
<v Speaker 1>Okay.

0:54:35.520 --> 0:54:37.920
<v Speaker 7>And I would also like to make more money.

0:54:38.719 --> 0:54:41.360
<v Speaker 1>Okay, do you make enough money now for you to

0:54:41.360 --> 0:54:42.359
<v Speaker 1>move out of your parents house.

0:54:44.000 --> 0:54:47.479
<v Speaker 7>No I don't, okay, which is crazy because I get

0:54:47.480 --> 0:54:48.880
<v Speaker 7>paid good hourly.

0:54:49.680 --> 0:54:52.600
<v Speaker 1>Yeah are they now? Is the job not giving you

0:54:52.680 --> 0:54:58.120
<v Speaker 1>enough hours? Or no, you're not making enough mon name

0:54:58.120 --> 0:54:59.480
<v Speaker 1>of any parents.

0:55:00.320 --> 0:55:04.439
<v Speaker 7>So I went in at like I moderately low pay.

0:55:05.320 --> 0:55:08.239
<v Speaker 7>They do like one dollar to two dollar raises if

0:55:08.280 --> 0:55:11.200
<v Speaker 7>you're really lucky once a year, and then after five

0:55:11.320 --> 0:55:13.400
<v Speaker 7>years you have to wait three years to get a

0:55:13.440 --> 0:55:16.800
<v Speaker 7>one dollar raise. So I went. I went from I

0:55:16.800 --> 0:55:19.880
<v Speaker 7>don't mind talking about money. I went from eighteen fifty

0:55:20.760 --> 0:55:23.440
<v Speaker 7>three years later, I'm now at twenty four dollars. So

0:55:23.520 --> 0:55:29.919
<v Speaker 7>I've gotten larger raises, but in two more years, I'm

0:55:29.920 --> 0:55:32.440
<v Speaker 7>still not going to be able to buy a house

0:55:32.560 --> 0:55:33.919
<v Speaker 7>or even afford a nice car.

0:55:35.200 --> 0:55:38.680
<v Speaker 1>Okay, what about moving out and getting like you know,

0:55:38.760 --> 0:55:42.480
<v Speaker 1>into a spot with like three other dudes in a

0:55:42.520 --> 0:55:45.759
<v Speaker 1>house as a roommate. Do you have enough to afford that?

0:55:47.840 --> 0:55:50.640
<v Speaker 7>I would have enough to afford that. I just don't

0:55:50.920 --> 0:55:53.439
<v Speaker 7>know any people who are in the position to move

0:55:53.520 --> 0:55:54.760
<v Speaker 7>out being single.

0:55:55.600 --> 0:56:01.520
<v Speaker 1>Okay, Well, I mean I don't know. Man. I got

0:56:01.560 --> 0:56:04.000
<v Speaker 1>a couple of thoughts about this. Uh and again this

0:56:04.160 --> 0:56:08.200
<v Speaker 1>is you know, I still think that if if you're

0:56:09.920 --> 0:56:13.360
<v Speaker 1>what you're experiencing does seem like it's it's a serious

0:56:13.360 --> 0:56:16.520
<v Speaker 1>issue that's been persistent and you should totally go and

0:56:16.560 --> 0:56:21.719
<v Speaker 1>get a professional's opinion on this. But I mean, if

0:56:21.719 --> 0:56:27.400
<v Speaker 1>you're not happy with your life and everyone and everyone

0:56:27.440 --> 0:56:30.359
<v Speaker 1>has like you know, everyone has aspects of their life

0:56:30.360 --> 0:56:32.640
<v Speaker 1>even if things are going great, or like you know,

0:56:32.760 --> 0:56:35.920
<v Speaker 1>days where they get upset and angry and like you know,

0:56:36.000 --> 0:56:38.520
<v Speaker 1>maybe lose control over their anger and whatnot. But if

0:56:38.560 --> 0:56:41.839
<v Speaker 1>on a top line, you're not happy with what's going

0:56:41.880 --> 0:56:46.239
<v Speaker 1>on with you, you know, you're just gonna be pissed off

0:56:46.239 --> 0:56:50.360
<v Speaker 1>all the time, and that's gonna, you know, give you

0:56:50.400 --> 0:56:55.400
<v Speaker 1>that diarrhea that you then you know, give to your mother.

0:56:58.000 --> 0:57:04.400
<v Speaker 1>And so I think, you know what I what's giving

0:57:04.440 --> 0:57:07.480
<v Speaker 1>me hope about you from you know, the ten minutes

0:57:07.480 --> 0:57:13.800
<v Speaker 1>I've been talking to you, is that you seem very calm,

0:57:14.239 --> 0:57:21.240
<v Speaker 1>You seem very collected, you seem very to the point

0:57:21.440 --> 0:57:25.080
<v Speaker 1>about this is my issue. I know it is an issue.

0:57:25.920 --> 0:57:28.880
<v Speaker 1>Here's my vague ideas of how I'm going to fix

0:57:28.920 --> 0:57:42.280
<v Speaker 1>this issue. And that's a good place to start. Tell

0:57:42.320 --> 0:57:45.560
<v Speaker 1>me about your girlfriend. You just broke up with her?

0:57:47.920 --> 0:57:51.040
<v Speaker 7>Uh yeah, well we've been broken up for probably the

0:57:51.080 --> 0:57:56.320
<v Speaker 7>past two and a half months, consistently before that, like two.

0:57:56.320 --> 0:58:01.680
<v Speaker 1>Or three times, okay, because I feel like, and again

0:58:01.720 --> 0:58:02.800
<v Speaker 1>I don't want to tell you what to do with

0:58:02.840 --> 0:58:05.440
<v Speaker 1>your life, but I feel like if you have this

0:58:05.560 --> 0:58:09.400
<v Speaker 1>persistent anger issue that caused you to lash out at people,

0:58:10.160 --> 0:58:15.000
<v Speaker 1>it wouldn't be fair to her to keep being in

0:58:15.000 --> 0:58:20.280
<v Speaker 1>a relationship with her until you really, honestly feel like

0:58:20.600 --> 0:58:26.600
<v Speaker 1>you've resolved that problem.

0:58:26.920 --> 0:58:32.800
<v Speaker 7>Right now, I agree with you, but I just don't.

0:58:32.840 --> 0:58:36.520
<v Speaker 7>I just I think it's just too far gone right now?

0:58:37.520 --> 0:58:40.000
<v Speaker 1>What do you mean by too far gone?

0:58:40.680 --> 0:58:43.960
<v Speaker 7>Hmmm, Like so many things have happened that have been

0:58:44.000 --> 0:58:46.959
<v Speaker 7>my fault that there's just there's no chance that any

0:58:47.680 --> 0:58:50.880
<v Speaker 7>sane person in their mind would ever think about, oh well,

0:58:50.880 --> 0:58:51.840
<v Speaker 7>this won't happen again.

0:58:51.960 --> 0:58:59.240
<v Speaker 1>So okay, okay, you know what. I think it's good

0:58:59.280 --> 0:59:04.200
<v Speaker 1>that you know that. I think you might have to

0:59:04.240 --> 0:59:09.320
<v Speaker 1>just accept that. And I don't think it is the

0:59:09.720 --> 0:59:16.960
<v Speaker 1>crushing end of the world, because if you're like, Okay,

0:59:17.080 --> 0:59:19.920
<v Speaker 1>I did things in this relationship where nobody in the

0:59:20.000 --> 0:59:27.480
<v Speaker 1>right mind would forgive me afterwards or feel as though

0:59:27.520 --> 0:59:33.640
<v Speaker 1>this would not change, I think it's good for you

0:59:35.080 --> 0:59:41.680
<v Speaker 1>to now have this singular focused mindset towards Okay, I

0:59:41.880 --> 0:59:45.959
<v Speaker 1>can't be in a relationship right now. I just need

0:59:45.960 --> 0:59:50.520
<v Speaker 1>to focus one hundred percent on doing the things I

0:59:50.640 --> 0:59:54.400
<v Speaker 1>need to do to fix this about myself, because I

0:59:54.440 --> 0:59:59.200
<v Speaker 1>can't sustainably live life being the way that I'm being.

1:00:00.560 --> 1:00:06.640
<v Speaker 1>And you can do that by going to therapy, identifying

1:00:06.720 --> 1:00:09.000
<v Speaker 1>the things in your life that you have the ability

1:00:09.040 --> 1:00:16.560
<v Speaker 1>to change that can make it better so you're not

1:00:16.760 --> 1:00:19.080
<v Speaker 1>miserable all the time and taking that misery out on

1:00:19.120 --> 1:00:24.640
<v Speaker 1>other people. And I understand that you're seem as though

1:00:24.680 --> 1:00:28.560
<v Speaker 1>you're you're kind of mourning the loss of this relationship,

1:00:29.680 --> 1:00:33.480
<v Speaker 1>but look, if you truly love this person, I think

1:00:33.480 --> 1:00:40.080
<v Speaker 1>you'll understand that it's not fair for her to be

1:00:40.120 --> 1:00:45.560
<v Speaker 1>dealing with you before you've even dealt with yourself, and

1:00:45.600 --> 1:00:48.520
<v Speaker 1>so you'd be you'd be smart to let that go

1:00:50.160 --> 1:00:55.520
<v Speaker 1>and just focus one hundred on figuring out your shit,

1:00:56.520 --> 1:00:59.440
<v Speaker 1>which again from I don't I don't know you and

1:00:59.480 --> 1:01:03.200
<v Speaker 1>I don't you know, but about from the way that

1:01:03.240 --> 1:01:06.360
<v Speaker 1>you've presented yourself to us on the phone, it seems

1:01:06.400 --> 1:01:11.959
<v Speaker 1>like you have a good foundation of awareness of what

1:01:12.800 --> 1:01:16.560
<v Speaker 1>you're fucking up on to begin down that journey of

1:01:16.600 --> 1:01:20.680
<v Speaker 1>fixing it. That's that's what I get off of what

1:01:20.720 --> 1:01:21.240
<v Speaker 1>you've told me.

1:01:22.720 --> 1:01:25.920
<v Speaker 7>Oh and actually I remember I have been to therapy

1:01:26.040 --> 1:01:31.000
<v Speaker 7>recently as quote unquote adult. It depends on what you

1:01:31.040 --> 1:01:34.200
<v Speaker 7>think as adult. I was like seventeen, I got caught

1:01:34.200 --> 1:01:37.480
<v Speaker 7>what we I got caught with a smoking a weed

1:01:37.520 --> 1:01:40.800
<v Speaker 7>from my buddies, and the school made me go to

1:01:40.880 --> 1:01:45.960
<v Speaker 7>therapy for, you know, to get off of weed. And

1:01:46.160 --> 1:01:51.560
<v Speaker 7>in those therapy sessions, he put he said exactly what

1:01:51.600 --> 1:01:53.200
<v Speaker 7>you what you were saying right now, you know how

1:01:53.440 --> 1:01:55.000
<v Speaker 7>you know you're saying, how you were, how I carry

1:01:55.080 --> 1:01:58.360
<v Speaker 7>myself and how I presented myself over the phone. And

1:01:58.440 --> 1:02:02.520
<v Speaker 7>that only lasted ship maybe three weeks.

1:02:03.640 --> 1:02:04.040
<v Speaker 1>Mm hmm.

1:02:05.360 --> 1:02:08.200
<v Speaker 7>At that point, I was I was at an okay

1:02:08.400 --> 1:02:09.280
<v Speaker 7>point in my life.

1:02:09.680 --> 1:02:09.800
<v Speaker 1>Uh.

1:02:10.200 --> 1:02:13.720
<v Speaker 7>But then the very next well the next four months

1:02:13.720 --> 1:02:17.320
<v Speaker 7>after that, I had gotten arrested for some serious first

1:02:17.360 --> 1:02:17.960
<v Speaker 7>group feildings.

1:02:18.960 --> 1:02:29.880
<v Speaker 1>Okay, tell them before we just before we go, Charles,

1:02:30.840 --> 1:02:34.360
<v Speaker 1>do you have an idea of what your next step

1:02:34.440 --> 1:02:40.760
<v Speaker 1>is going to be after this too? Like, what what's

1:02:40.800 --> 1:02:43.400
<v Speaker 1>your next step on the path of dealing with this?

1:02:46.680 --> 1:02:51.680
<v Speaker 7>I guess I'm just going to focus on my career. Uh,

1:02:51.760 --> 1:02:54.920
<v Speaker 7>maybe a career change. I did go in today and

1:02:55.000 --> 1:02:57.480
<v Speaker 7>ask if they had other opportunities elsewhere. I asked for

1:02:57.920 --> 1:03:00.640
<v Speaker 7>a cudo training. Uh. They were of has shown the

1:03:00.720 --> 1:03:03.280
<v Speaker 7>idea and said that they would make an offer to

1:03:03.320 --> 1:03:06.480
<v Speaker 7>me to stay in the machine shop. So I will

1:03:06.480 --> 1:03:11.520
<v Speaker 7>see what happens with that. Other than that, I don't

1:03:11.560 --> 1:03:14.320
<v Speaker 7>really I don't really know. I kind of just kind

1:03:14.320 --> 1:03:16.200
<v Speaker 7>of just you know, I don't really believe in myself.

1:03:17.280 --> 1:03:23.560
<v Speaker 1>M hm m hm. This is Charles. I'm gonna say.

1:03:23.560 --> 1:03:25.919
<v Speaker 1>I think you should. I think you should consider going

1:03:26.000 --> 1:03:28.160
<v Speaker 1>back to real therapy. I think they would be able

1:03:28.200 --> 1:03:32.960
<v Speaker 1>to help you with this. I've said it already, which

1:03:33.000 --> 1:03:34.960
<v Speaker 1>is that I think you have a self awareness of

1:03:34.960 --> 1:03:38.520
<v Speaker 1>this issue enough that I do believe that from from

1:03:38.560 --> 1:03:42.240
<v Speaker 1>what I understand of you, I believe in your ability

1:03:42.840 --> 1:03:47.880
<v Speaker 1>to go from that foundation of awareness to making steps

1:03:47.920 --> 1:03:53.480
<v Speaker 1>to fix your problems. I hope that's worth something. Is

1:03:53.520 --> 1:03:55.760
<v Speaker 1>there anything else before we go that you want to

1:03:55.800 --> 1:03:59.720
<v Speaker 1>say or to the people of the computer or to me,

1:04:00.080 --> 1:04:00.760
<v Speaker 1>or about any of this.

1:04:03.840 --> 1:04:07.520
<v Speaker 7>Uh, what you do is really cool.

1:04:08.480 --> 1:04:09.000
<v Speaker 1>Thanks man.

1:04:09.280 --> 1:04:16.000
<v Speaker 7>Yeah wish I wish I could do the same, But yeah.

1:04:15.600 --> 1:04:18.640
<v Speaker 1>You'll find your thing. Man, You're still very young, and

1:04:19.440 --> 1:04:25.680
<v Speaker 1>I still feel as though you know you're sitting on

1:04:25.760 --> 1:04:36.440
<v Speaker 1>a good foundation to be better in the future. Right,

1:04:36.440 --> 1:04:41.360
<v Speaker 1>I'll talk to you soon, Charles, Thank you man. All right, man,

1:04:41.400 --> 1:04:44.680
<v Speaker 1>I really started this just like a fucking screwing around

1:04:44.720 --> 1:04:46.800
<v Speaker 1>and a Gecko costume on Reddit, and now I like,

1:04:46.920 --> 1:04:51.160
<v Speaker 1>really am sitting here pretending to be a therapist. I

1:04:51.200 --> 1:04:52.760
<v Speaker 1>just noticed that at the end of that twenty minutes,

1:04:52.800 --> 1:04:57.680
<v Speaker 1>I was like, damn, I really like out here pretending

1:04:57.680 --> 1:05:01.000
<v Speaker 1>to be a therapist and getting into it. I enjoyed

1:05:01.040 --> 1:05:03.640
<v Speaker 1>having that conversation with Charles, and I did want to

1:05:03.640 --> 1:05:08.240
<v Speaker 1>help him in that moment. That was a tough thing

1:05:12.440 --> 1:05:17.160
<v Speaker 1>because the whole I remember what I said at the

1:05:17.240 --> 1:05:21.240
<v Speaker 1>very beginning, where he was like, I'm an asshole, and

1:05:21.280 --> 1:05:26.800
<v Speaker 1>it's like I don't like that. However, however true it

1:05:26.840 --> 1:05:35.880
<v Speaker 1>is of something like that. It's like, well, how do

1:05:35.960 --> 1:05:43.360
<v Speaker 1>we optimize something for a person to get better and

1:05:43.400 --> 1:05:51.640
<v Speaker 1>be a productive member of society for themselves? And I

1:05:51.680 --> 1:05:57.479
<v Speaker 1>think to forego the labeling and just go listen. Can't

1:05:57.520 --> 1:06:05.040
<v Speaker 1>change the past, but can work towards something more productive

1:06:05.040 --> 1:06:10.040
<v Speaker 1>for the future. I think pretty much everyone can do that,

1:06:10.960 --> 1:06:17.520
<v Speaker 1>and I'm hoping that Charles finds his laying see here

1:06:17.520 --> 1:06:20.720
<v Speaker 1>I am. I'm fucking around trying to say therapist shit

1:06:21.640 --> 1:06:27.160
<v Speaker 1>in this gecko costume. I'm doing the best I can, Folks,

1:06:27.160 --> 1:06:31.520
<v Speaker 1>I'm trying. Neverly goes on the line taking your phone

1:06:31.560 --> 1:06:32.480
<v Speaker 1>calls every night.

1:06:32.880 --> 1:06:34.760
<v Speaker 5>Never Deacon goes doing to ride.

1:06:34.840 --> 1:06:37.040
<v Speaker 1>Who's teaching you aloud in your life?

1:06:37.400 --> 1:06:39.600
<v Speaker 5>But he's not really an expert.