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Speaker 1: My parents opened several credit cards in my name. What

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Speaker 1: do I do? And this comes from parental problematic and

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Speaker 1: they say, I guess there's a lesson in paying attention

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Speaker 1: to my finances. After having just finished my freshman year

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Speaker 1: of college, I came back to my parents' house for

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Speaker 1: the summer. My mom made it a habit on Monday

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Speaker 1: and Tuesday to make sure she got the mail before

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Speaker 1: I had a chance, even running from the kitchen Tuesday

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Speaker 1: to make sure I didn't get it, as I was

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Speaker 1: expecting an Amazon order today. The mail came kind of

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Speaker 1: early and there was a letter from a collection agency

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Speaker 1: addressed to me. I only knew it was a collection

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Speaker 1: agency once I opened it and discovered I supposedly owed

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Speaker 1: nearly five thousand dollars on a Capital one card. I

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Speaker 1: had no idea I was ever signed up for. Once

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Speaker 1: I got done freaking out, I called my dad at

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Speaker 1: work and asked him what to do. It was weird

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Speaker 1: when he said to talk to my mother about it.

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Speaker 1: He didn't seem happy at all, but I didn't think

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Speaker 1: much of it. But I see you in the chat

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Speaker 1: if you know what's coming. Once my mom got home,

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Speaker 1: I asked her about it and She said her and

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Speaker 1: my dad opened up a few credit cards of my

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Speaker 1: name were household expenses. She said she thinks I owe

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Speaker 1: around ten thousand dollars to three different credit card companies.

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Speaker 1: I checked my credit and it turns out I owe

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Speaker 1: over fifteen thousand dollars. We ended up having a huge

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Speaker 1: argument about it, with my mom saying her parents did

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Speaker 1: this to her when she was eighteen. She said that

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Speaker 1: I could file for bankruptcy and that it wouldn't hurt

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Speaker 1: me because I wouldn't be trying to buy a house

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Speaker 1: for several years. I'm interested in going to a government

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Speaker 1: related job, and a bankruptcy would probably disqualify me for it.

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Speaker 1: She knows this, but it doesn't seem like she cares.

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Speaker 1: This is so awful. Also hurt people, hurt people. It's like, yeah,

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Speaker 1: my mom did this to me? Is all go it

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Speaker 1: to you, right, my mom?

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Speaker 2: This is just a parent bonding Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I gets it. Gets you close, sir, you know, like

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Speaker 1: obviously it turned out so well because now I have

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Speaker 1: to borrow money from you. Yeah, why don't you? I mean,

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Speaker 1: isn't this why you have kids? So you can steal

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Speaker 1: their identity, steal.

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Speaker 2: Their and ruin their credit.

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Speaker 1: Right, It's like, you know, the kids don't farm on

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Speaker 1: your land anymore, so you just got to farm them

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Speaker 1: for money. I open up credit cards, so yoicks she

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Speaker 1: knows this, but doesn't seem like she cares. My dad

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Speaker 1: got home a couple of hours ago and they talked

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Speaker 1: to me together. Either I can declare bankruptcy once they

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Speaker 1: spend up to the credit card limit of the last

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Speaker 1: card with any credit on it, or they said I

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Speaker 1: could move out at the end of the month. It

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Speaker 1: just feels like it's incredibly unfair because it doesn't sound

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Speaker 1: like bankruptcy will actually do anything for my credit and

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Speaker 1: probably sink my job opportunities. How can I get my

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Speaker 1: credit score back to where it was, which was around

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Speaker 1: seven twenty and how can I get this to not

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Speaker 1: affect my credit going or we do have some comments, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: but question what would you do police, police, lawsuit, police lawsuit?

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Speaker 1: Socrates says lawsuit. It'd be the equivalent to divorce chant lawsuit, lawsuit, lawsuit, lawsuit, lotsuit.

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Speaker 1: We did it at different cadence, I'll do it at

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Speaker 1: yours lawsuit lossuit. So Checking Out twenty twenty four says

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Speaker 1: that's identity taft and it's not a joke a job,

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Speaker 1: it's a foul. The ball is in your court. You

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Speaker 1: could easily have them arrested and you can lion their property.

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Speaker 1: What does that mean, Lion? Yeah, Leon, I don't lion

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Speaker 1: ian take their property. I think it means take We

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Speaker 1: look that up. Yes, Lion, I feel like you would

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Speaker 1: know this with your all of your books. You read

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Speaker 1: my books.

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Speaker 2: A right to keep possession of property belonging to another

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Speaker 2: person until a debt owed by that person is nine March.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, muffin Man eight oh seven says not sure if

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Speaker 1: this is another comment, but I'll write this out. One.

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Speaker 1: F these pieces of crap, you owe them nothing. Now,

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Speaker 1: this is an egregious betrayal of you as a person.

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Speaker 1: They are trading your financial future for some new crap

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Speaker 1: in their house. F them. Two, you are a tenant

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Speaker 1: and they can't just kick you out. They have to

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Speaker 1: evict you if they change the locks, throw your stuff away,

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Speaker 1: or anything like that. Call the police for an illegal eviction. Three.

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Speaker 1: Absolutely record the next conversation you have on the subject.

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Speaker 1: Use the voice recorder on your phone, but record the conversation.

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Speaker 1: Go to the police and file a police report with

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Speaker 1: the evidence it will be able to be removed from

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Speaker 1: her credit card and hopefully land them with some jail

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Speaker 1: time and a big fine, hopefully and five f these people.

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Speaker 1: I have three kids, and I can't imagine stealing from them.

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Speaker 1: And there is an update. But what kind of parents

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Speaker 1: do you have to be to steal.

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Speaker 2: Your children, I mean, stealing your children's money.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I feel like a sam pronounced it like lean

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Speaker 1: when you ow a car.

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Speaker 2: You have heard put to put a lien on something.

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Speaker 1: I've never heard that before.

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Speaker 2: I don't think I've read it pronounced.

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Speaker 1: Lean when you owe. It's when you owe a car.

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Speaker 1: The bank has a lien on the car until it's

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Speaker 1: paid for. If you don't pay, they can take the car.

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Speaker 1: She could put a lien on their house, car, et cetera.

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Speaker 1: So oh she could get the car, she could get

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Speaker 1: it all back. Yeah, that would be sick. Yeah, bad

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Speaker 1: parents parents, bad parents that had bad parents. Yeah. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: But update. So I ended up taking the advice of

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Speaker 1: the vast majority of people, and I filed a police report.

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Speaker 1: The officer to Osyvia. We're doing We're doing continent.

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Speaker 2: Oh sick, Okay, Steve, he is coming over to watch

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Speaker 2: Planet of the Apes.

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Speaker 1: But we can play on we're playing Katon. I don't know,

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Speaker 1: but it's but it's a five person game.

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Speaker 2: Well we can be one person. I already I already

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Speaker 2: invited her over.

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Speaker 1: I'm not I put I said, in said a caound advice. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: do not pay attention to my calendar invites.

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Speaker 2: I pay attention to when you tell me verbally, and.

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Speaker 1: I tell you verbally's Katan tonight and juneto tomorrow. Update.

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Speaker 1: I ended up taking the advice of the vast majority

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Speaker 1: of people here, and I filed a police report. The

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Speaker 1: officer took some printouts of everything as evidence. Once I

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Speaker 1: had the report, I called all of the places listed

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Speaker 1: on my report and gave them the report number. The

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Speaker 1: three credit card companies all took it and were pretty

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Speaker 1: cool with it. The collection agency wanted me to make

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Speaker 1: a good will payment so they could start investigating my

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Speaker 1: claim that it was flaggerant, that it was fraudulent. They

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Speaker 1: said they could still sue me even with the police

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Speaker 1: report if I didn't cooperate with their fraud report. I refuse, obviously,

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Speaker 1: as I don't want them to be able to take

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Speaker 1: money out of my bank account. I never told my

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Speaker 1: parents that I went to the police and for a

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Speaker 1: couple of weeks they had no idea. Right after Memorial Day,

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Speaker 1: they received a call from a detective and everything blew up.

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Speaker 1: After the call, they began screaming at me and my

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Speaker 1: dad started literally rowing my things out of the door.

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Speaker 1: I called the police at that time, and they showed

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Speaker 1: up and told my parents if they wanted me to leave,

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Speaker 1: they would have to evict. I came home from work

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Speaker 1: the next day and the locks were changed. I called

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Speaker 1: the police again and my parents refused to open the

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Speaker 1: door and said all of my stuff was at my grandparents' house.

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Speaker 1: I received another report number for unlawful eviction, which I

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Speaker 1: was told was a civil issue, and got my stuff

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Speaker 1: from my grandparents. These parents are terrible. These are the

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Speaker 1: worst stairs.

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Speaker 3: What kind of parents are These parents?

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Speaker 1: More like enemies?

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Speaker 2: Wait a minute, what kind of parents are you?

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Speaker 1: Luckily, I have a friend with a couple of spare

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Speaker 1: bedrooms and she said I'm welcome to stay with her

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Speaker 1: for a couple of months. I'm scheduled to move into

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Speaker 1: my own place in about a week. Once I get

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Speaker 1: a full tally of the total cost of everything included

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Speaker 1: in a moving I'll be filing a civil lawsuit against

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Speaker 1: my parents for a lawful eviction. I was told by

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Speaker 1: the same detective my parents didn't seem very truthful with anything,

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Speaker 1: and the State's attorney's office will be in contact in

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Speaker 1: the next few weeks. Regarding identity theft charge. He said

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Speaker 1: he believes they will likely prosecute, possibly as soon as

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Speaker 1: this week. If that's the case, they, or more likely

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Speaker 1: just my mom will be issued a warrant and have

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Speaker 1: to spend at least a night in jail. No matter what,

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Speaker 1: I feel as though I made the right choice. And

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Speaker 1: there is some additional comments from op finishes aw so OP.

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Speaker 1: I'll put another update if my mom ends up getting

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Speaker 1: arrested and or if my civil suit has any action

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Speaker 1: on it. I appreciate everyone's advice, and a compter says

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Speaker 1: you probably spoke to a collections agent who lied to

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Speaker 1: you about them needing a good faith payment to start

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Speaker 1: investigating one. No good faith payment is needed to investigate

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Speaker 1: a situation like this, especially with police report. Two. The

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Speaker 1: moment you pay them, they legally classify that as you

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Speaker 1: ex accepting responsibility for the full amount as your debt. Three.

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Speaker 1: Credit card companies and their debt collectors cannot sue you.

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Speaker 1: They will just put it on your credit report and

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Speaker 1: harass you. And that is where that story ends. Wow,

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Speaker 1: your parents suck, Your parents suck. Go no contact leave.

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Speaker 1: I don't know, because they're the OP is staying in

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Speaker 1: their house. I don't know if it's worth it just

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Speaker 1: to stay in their house, just like say that. But

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Speaker 1: I think what is good is op's building a case.

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Speaker 1: It's like they evicted me illegally, they stole my identity,

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Speaker 1: they threw my stuff out. I feel like OP is

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Speaker 1: building a case where they will be able to come

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Speaker 1: back at their parents and get a leaned against all

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Speaker 1: the belongings. Get leaned, bro, get leaned.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, this is horrible, horrible parents, and I think OP

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Speaker 2: is definitely in the right to get this.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, but that's that's where that story ends.

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Speaker 2: The story. I mean, so how we got through all

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Speaker 2: these stories? We did three stories and we got through.

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Speaker 2: But we do have some some callins. Two collins. Then

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Speaker 2: we'll be good.

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Speaker 1: Two Collins. What are we at? We should let's do

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Speaker 1: another story?

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Speaker 2: Okay, but should we do a call on it?

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Speaker 4: All?

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Speaker 1: Yeah? Should story? Okay?

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Speaker 2: All right, Sofia callen As promised.

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Speaker 1: Oh right, Sophia telling your story? What is it? What's

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Speaker 1: the what?

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Speaker 2: Being friends with an X and lying about your history

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Speaker 2: with them to your current partner?

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Speaker 1: Oh, Sophia was friends with an AX and is lying

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Speaker 1: or vice versa? Wait? Wait, what do they say exactly?

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Speaker 1: It was?

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Speaker 2: But being friends with an X and lying about your

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Speaker 2: history with them to your current partner?

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Speaker 1: I think maybe it is. Then let's let's find out.

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Speaker 2: All right, Sophia, we're gonna call you momentarily, get freaking hyped.

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Speaker 1: Has it made in the shade? Yes, we can hear you, Sophia.

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Speaker 1: How's it going?

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Speaker 4: New? Here's you? I didn't put my sound on.

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Speaker 2: You can't hear us?

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Speaker 1: Can you hear us? Now?

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Speaker 4: Do you hear me?

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Speaker 1: I can hear you. Can you hear us?

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Speaker 4: Yes? I can hear you.

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Speaker 1: Hello. Hello, So Sophia, you told us that you have

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Speaker 1: a story about being friends with an ex and lying

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Speaker 1: about that history with your current partner. Were you the

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Speaker 1: person that was lying or being lied to?

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Speaker 4: It's a little bit like I was. I was friends

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Speaker 4: with my ex and my ex was lying to his

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Speaker 4: current partner and I didn't know.

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Speaker 1: Oh, your your ex was lying to his current partner

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Speaker 1: about your relationships?

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Speaker 4: Yes, and she ended up texting me and calling me,

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Speaker 4: and I had to.

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Speaker 1: Reveal, Yeah, so, Sophia, you were saying that your ex

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Speaker 1: was hiding your friendship from his current partner.

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Speaker 4: That's not exactly it. He knew that we were friends,

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Speaker 4: but he didn't tell her that I was his ex.

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Speaker 4: And we were in a relationship for like one year

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Speaker 4: and a half, me and him, and so we still

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Speaker 4: talked and we still talked about our family, but he

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Speaker 4: didn't tell her that we were together. So one day

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Speaker 4: she just called me and she was like, were you together?

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Speaker 4: And I was like yes, and he asked, did y'all kids?

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Speaker 4: And it was like, it's relating to the last story

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Speaker 4: where the person like didn't say that they had like

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Speaker 4: spicy sleep with their eggs or whatever with their best friend.

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Speaker 4: But she didn't know that he was actually active at all,

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Speaker 4: and so I had to expose it to her and

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Speaker 4: it broke her heart, and I was so sad that

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Speaker 4: I had to be the one to say it. So

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Speaker 4: it basically always felt like what you did in your

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Speaker 4: past to your new partners, because like it really hurt

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Speaker 4: her and I was I felt so bad.

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Speaker 1: So so she thought that he wasn't like he was

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Speaker 1: a virgin.

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Speaker 4: I'm not sure she thought he was a virgin. I

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Speaker 4: think she kind of theyd like he knew he was

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Speaker 4: actually active after I told her that, Like we were

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Speaker 4: together for one and a half year and we did

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Speaker 4: stuff for one and a half year, So I think

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Speaker 4: he kind of played it cool and said, oh, I

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Speaker 4: knew he had like three partners. But I don't think

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Speaker 4: he knew because she asked me, did Joe kids? And

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Speaker 4: if I was together with him for like a year

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Speaker 4: and a half and she knew what he had sexual

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Speaker 4: relationship or sleep like he kind of put together. I think.

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Speaker 1: So what ended up happening with his current partner? So

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Speaker 1: you reveal that he actually isn't a virgin? You guys

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Speaker 1: were were spicy sleeping on the rag for a year,

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Speaker 1: and this is news to her. So did what did

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Speaker 1: she do? Did she break up with them? Was she

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Speaker 1: did she stay with them? What happened?

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Speaker 4: I'm pretty sure she broke up with them, but like afterwards,

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Speaker 4: I tried to like know she was okay, and she said,

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Speaker 4: like listen, just talking to you it just bricked my

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Speaker 4: heart and she wasn't talking able to talk to me

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Speaker 4: because it brought it brought bad memories. But then later

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Speaker 4: on my ex texted me and he said, you ruined

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Speaker 4: my life. So I think I think she did.

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Speaker 1: Well honestly. I mean, he shouldn't have lied. It's not

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Speaker 1: on you. And related to those like the last couple

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Speaker 1: of stories where it's like should you question Yeah, like

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Speaker 1: like should you reveal secrets in relationships? I feel like

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Speaker 1: generally it's better to have the the truth, the truth

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Speaker 1: come out. And and I also, it's not like you

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Speaker 1: were telling the truth out of any malice. Yeah you were.

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Speaker 1: You were, you know, doing it out of just a

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Speaker 1: place of wanting to be truthful. And you were asked

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Speaker 1: a direct question and you gave a direct answer lying

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Speaker 1: about not like having spicy sleep with someone is pretty whack.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 4: Yeah. And I felt like it robbed her from what

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Speaker 4: she wanted in a partner because if it had gone

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Speaker 4: on and she didn't know and she ended up like

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Speaker 4: you know, committed to him, and he finds out and

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Speaker 4: she found out later on, yeah, kind.

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Speaker 1: Of like she would be more devastated. Like imagine if

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Speaker 1: they had kids together like that would that would have

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Speaker 1: been even worse. So like, good on you for actually

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Speaker 1: bringing up when you did so you haven't had any

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Speaker 1: contact with your ex since then.

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Speaker 4: No, I've locked in because I thought I thought he

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Speaker 4: was a good guy, and then when I heard what

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Speaker 4: he did to this girl, I was like, hmmm, I'm

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Speaker 4: not sure I know who he is anymore.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and also like like even if you know, you

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Speaker 1: don't have both sides of the story, Like that's just

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Speaker 1: so much drama that you don't want to get involved in. Actually,

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Speaker 1: I feel like it is a I think you did.

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Speaker 1: I think you made, you made all the right decisions. Well, Sophia,

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Speaker 1: thank you so much for call again. Super relevant story

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Speaker 1: to this episode. Shout out you.

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Speaker 2: I mean I say something to so to second.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, okay, I did make your love your like a

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Speaker 4: love letter, but it's been like a month and I

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Speaker 4: haven't sent it. So I'm gonna do and you want

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Speaker 4: so you have a better love letters. But the one

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Speaker 4: I did was really small, So I'm going to do

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Speaker 4: another one and I'm going to send both of them.

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Speaker 2: That's so sweet.

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Speaker 1: Thank you, that's so.

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Speaker 2: I cannot wait. Thank you.

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Speaker 1: Letters from Sofia to Sophia.

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Speaker 2: Yes, thank you.

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Speaker 4: Oh and just my last name is Callum.

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Speaker 1: If you want to talon, well, Sophia carl Sovia cal On.

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Speaker 1: Thank you so much for call again, and uh we

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Speaker 1: appreciate your story.

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Speaker 4: No worries. Thank you so much.

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Speaker 1: I have a great rest of your day. See in

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Speaker 1: the stream. Dang dude, people out here be a lyon

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Speaker 1: hear lion about being virgins. I remember in high school

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Speaker 1: when people lied about not being virgins. Now all the

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Speaker 1: tides have turned.

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Speaker 2: What's what's up with that?

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Speaker 1: What's up with that? Golon?

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Speaker 2: But yeah, I can, I can pull up another story.

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Speaker 1: Ye do you want to dolls?

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Speaker 2: So freaking cool.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, we're like yeating through these eating through, eaten through

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Speaker 1: this couch is so comfy. My goodness, goodness, gracious, ignacious,

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Speaker 1: holy moly, fuck em moly.

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Speaker 2: Okay, you know this one, this one for sure doesn't relate,

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Speaker 2: but we're going to read it.

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Speaker 1: All right, let's do it. My wife said she's not

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Speaker 1: only sex. Also, this comes from main Side seven seven

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Speaker 1: thirty eight. She is right, she is not only sex

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Speaker 1: just because I am her husband. But I cannot take

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Speaker 1: it anymore. Sexual incompatibility is hell. I've been busy drafting

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Speaker 1: divorced documents with my lawyer this week. I believe it's

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Speaker 1: best if we separate it because we have become incompatible

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Speaker 1: after some time four years of marriage, both in early thirties.

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Speaker 1: Hormone tests came up as normal. I beg marriage counseling,

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Speaker 1: with sex therapy. I did everything she pointed out. She

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Speaker 1: came up with other excuses since the beginning of the relationship.

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Speaker 1: We take turns handling laundry and dishes for the other tasks.

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Speaker 1: We have our own responsibilities for different rooms slash tasks.

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Speaker 1: It's not in the sexual department as well. She does

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Speaker 1: not seem to be into having non sexual intimacy either. Recently,

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Speaker 1: countless discussions and nothing in the end. I'm guessing cheating.

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Speaker 1: Unless it's been this like like this from the beginning,

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Speaker 1: she could just be asexual. But if it was a

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Speaker 1: change cheating, that is my guess. Well, it was not

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Speaker 1: like that in the beginning. There we go. It wasn't

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Speaker 1: like that in the beginning, so I'm not sure what happened.

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Speaker 1: Marriage counseling and sexual therapy did not work either. She

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Speaker 1: seems happy in the relationship in daily life, but I

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Speaker 1: am not. We have only had sex two times since

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Speaker 1: the beginning of this year. When was this written? Ooh,

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Speaker 1: tell me when it was written quickly.

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Speaker 2: It's the story twenty four.

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Speaker 1: Oh, so it's been five months full of full five

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Speaker 1: months in five months, pretty tough. Couldn't be tough unless

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Speaker 1: she was on a trip, yeah, and then that would

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Speaker 1: be okay. And or long distance relationship. I don't know,

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Speaker 1: Like how old is this person? Thirty? I feel like

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Speaker 1: maybe this is not true, and I feel like I

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Speaker 1: might get crapped for their in the comments. But I

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Speaker 1: feel like sexual compatibility becomes less important with age. That

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Speaker 1: is a bold statement that I have nothing to back

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Speaker 1: up with.

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Speaker 2: I don't personally can't murd deny that.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I can, also, I just not.

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Speaker 2: I think maybe libido goes down with age.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. I don't know, But I did.

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Speaker 2: Watch a documentary about a ren fair which is actually

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Speaker 2: really interesting, and so it kind of centers around this

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Speaker 2: guy and they call him King George and like eighty

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Speaker 2: seven and his whole thing. He's like I want before

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Speaker 2: I die, I want to love and he's just talking

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Speaker 2: about how horny is how he like hired this guy

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Speaker 2: to find him dates on like dating apps, and it's

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Speaker 2: just so he could like.

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Speaker 1: You know that, do you love bubbles? Brings up a

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Speaker 1: good point the nursing homes would agree with you, Sam,

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Speaker 1: I actually heard, yeah, retire homes be popping. So yeah,

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Speaker 1: I'm probably very wrong here.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I was from the from the documentary I watched.

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Speaker 1: Retirement homes. It's like college for old people. Everyone's everything

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Speaker 1: that's own.

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Speaker 2: Honestly, kind of sounds fun.

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Speaker 1: To be at a retirement home, and of sounds fun.

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Speaker 2: If I were old, I might want to be at

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Speaker 2: a retirement home.

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Speaker 1: I think I would.

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Speaker 2: I want to well, okay, it would depend. I wouldn't

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Speaker 2: want to be at a retirement home where I couldn't leave,

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Speaker 2: but if I can leave, but if I could leave,

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Speaker 2: and it's just like college, it depends on the retirement home.

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Speaker 1: Getting back to this year, Yeah, I'm very wrong. You know.

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Speaker 1: Sometimes I just say out of pocket things and you know,

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Speaker 1: I get corrected, and that's you know, that's part of

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Speaker 1: learning and growing and being Sam back, it takes.

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Speaker 2: Perhaps it is more true to say libido chain can.

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Speaker 1: Change, can change. Yeah, yeah, I think so. I think so.

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Speaker 1: But okay, two times at the beginning of this year,

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Speaker 1: which is not that many times, she mentioned we should

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Speaker 1: start trying to have kids at the beginning of this week,

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Speaker 1: and I got annoyed. What am I something kept for

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Speaker 1: the breeding? I will give her the divorce notice documents

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Speaker 1: next Monday. I am torn to leave the relationship like that.

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Speaker 1: I also leave the house as soon as possible. However,

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Speaker 1: I am sure I am doing both of us a favor.

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Speaker 1: Long run, we should separate before having kids. Just want

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Speaker 1: to to vent and get opinion from a neutral point

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Speaker 1: of view. What do you think? John? What do you think? Wait?

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Speaker 1: Go go back to John who in the retirement home.

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Speaker 1: You know it can get pretty wed and wild, John, Jeohn,

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Speaker 1: you have a girlfriend.

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Speaker 3: I can't believe you would say that. Merge got it? Woh,

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Speaker 3: he's got it?

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Speaker 1: Dook? Don you old story? What happened? I mean, I

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Speaker 1: think you know if you've talked about it and she

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Speaker 1: said she would make changes and there's not changes, and

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Speaker 1: it's really important to you, Like you can decide whatever

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Speaker 1: relationship that you want to be in. If you don't

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Speaker 1: want to be in that anymore, then that's fine.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, I agree.

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Speaker 1: Oh, she's pregnant, she's cheated, She's pregnant already. She is

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Speaker 1: trying to cover up the pregnancy conspiracy theory. Wow, good

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Speaker 1: catch all? Right, shall we go into the comments yeah

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Speaker 1: so relevant comments. Opie was asked if he has his

439
00:20:05,080 --> 00:20:07,359
Speaker 1: wife if he and his wife had kids in their marriage,

440
00:20:07,359 --> 00:20:10,040
Speaker 1: Opie says, it is obvious the resembment would grow even

441
00:20:10,040 --> 00:20:12,080
Speaker 1: more in the future. Having a child in that environment

442
00:20:12,119 --> 00:20:14,240
Speaker 1: would be such a cruel thing to do. Opie having

443
00:20:14,359 --> 00:20:16,040
Speaker 1: the divorce talks with the wife. I told her that

444
00:20:16,080 --> 00:20:18,119
Speaker 1: I would consider divorce in her last talk, but she

445
00:20:18,160 --> 00:20:20,639
Speaker 1: did not even believe it nor took it seriously. Also,

446
00:20:20,720 --> 00:20:23,400
Speaker 1: I do not believe people should stay in miserable positions

447
00:20:23,440 --> 00:20:25,600
Speaker 1: in any part of their life. Everyone has a right

448
00:20:25,640 --> 00:20:29,440
Speaker 1: to leave and choose better for themselves. A great Opie responds,

449
00:20:29,840 --> 00:20:34,080
Speaker 1: do you think John whose I didn't think everyone has

450
00:20:34,240 --> 00:20:37,400
Speaker 1: a right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

451
00:20:37,880 --> 00:20:42,719
Speaker 3: I was signing those documents all those years ago. I

452
00:20:42,760 --> 00:20:49,600
Speaker 3: really do believe that everyone should have a good life,

453
00:20:49,600 --> 00:20:52,200
Speaker 3: all right. Anyway, it's crazy that you signed the doculation

454
00:20:52,280 --> 00:20:55,040
Speaker 3: of independence. It's really cool anyway, Opie having the divorce

455
00:20:55,080 --> 00:20:57,560
Speaker 3: talks with the wife. Yeah, they should choose better for themselves.

456
00:20:57,720 --> 00:21:01,399
Speaker 3: Opie responds to questions on the sex life with his

457
00:21:01,760 --> 00:21:05,800
Speaker 3: wife A spicy sleep, wild light Opie first two years

458
00:21:05,840 --> 00:21:08,800
Speaker 3: of marriage it was good. After that, it started declining

459
00:21:08,800 --> 00:21:11,760
Speaker 3: to the point of almost no spicy sleep. I do

460
00:21:11,920 --> 00:21:14,080
Speaker 3: not think she's having an affair because there is no

461
00:21:14,240 --> 00:21:16,879
Speaker 3: clue or something to make me suspicious. We were mostly

462
00:21:16,960 --> 00:21:19,159
Speaker 3: together and she did not give me any reason to

463
00:21:19,200 --> 00:21:21,600
Speaker 3: be suspicious of. Okay, there goes that theory.

464
00:21:21,800 --> 00:21:23,840
Speaker 2: Oh, it could just be like a I think that

465
00:21:24,040 --> 00:21:26,600
Speaker 2: I think there might be a change in or maybe

466
00:21:26,600 --> 00:21:28,960
Speaker 2: not a change perhaps, but like she might be coming

467
00:21:29,000 --> 00:21:31,880
Speaker 2: to understand sexuality and it's different than what she expected,

468
00:21:31,960 --> 00:21:34,000
Speaker 2: or it's you know, or it's just changed for her,

469
00:21:34,119 --> 00:21:36,080
Speaker 2: which doesn't mean that op, you should have to stay

470
00:21:36,080 --> 00:21:38,560
Speaker 2: together with you regardless of whether or not that's true.

471
00:21:38,680 --> 00:21:40,240
Speaker 1: Yeah, John, what do you think about that? Well, I

472
00:21:40,400 --> 00:21:43,240
Speaker 1: remember when my balls dropped for the second.

473
00:21:42,880 --> 00:21:44,399
Speaker 3: Time, things change for me.

474
00:21:44,800 --> 00:21:47,280
Speaker 1: Oh, John, that's that's super interesting thing. Well, let's get

475
00:21:47,320 --> 00:21:50,760
Speaker 1: back into the story. Well, I just tried to fix

476
00:21:50,800 --> 00:21:52,240
Speaker 1: it and change it for two years. In the end,

477
00:21:52,320 --> 00:21:54,720
Speaker 1: nothing worked and I decided to divorce. So Parla call says,

478
00:21:54,760 --> 00:21:57,199
Speaker 1: that's crazy that she's considering having kids with you and

479
00:21:57,240 --> 00:22:00,320
Speaker 1: you were considering divorce. Two people living together get so

480
00:22:00,600 --> 00:22:05,440
Speaker 1: far apart and update. So the first post can be

481
00:22:05,520 --> 00:22:07,840
Speaker 1: found in my profile. I will keep this update short.

482
00:22:08,000 --> 00:22:11,800
Speaker 1: She got the noticspapers this morning and was shocked. I

483
00:22:11,920 --> 00:22:15,239
Speaker 1: explained to her in detail and thoroughly why I came

484
00:22:15,280 --> 00:22:18,680
Speaker 1: to that decision. I pointed out every previous discussion we had. However,

485
00:22:18,720 --> 00:22:20,919
Speaker 1: there were no efforts from her side and we were

486
00:22:20,920 --> 00:22:24,280
Speaker 1: simply incombatible. In the end, it was crying and arguments again.

487
00:22:24,400 --> 00:22:26,280
Speaker 1: I also told her I would be going back to

488
00:22:26,359 --> 00:22:29,719
Speaker 1: my hometown to settle in my pre marital house. It

489
00:22:29,760 --> 00:22:31,879
Speaker 1: was my mom's, but after she passed away, we shared

490
00:22:31,920 --> 00:22:34,040
Speaker 1: it half and half with my sister, though I gave

491
00:22:34,160 --> 00:22:35,880
Speaker 1: my share to my sister. Later we had to move

492
00:22:35,920 --> 00:22:37,720
Speaker 1: to our current city due to my wife's job. A

493
00:22:37,760 --> 00:22:39,840
Speaker 1: lot happened that day, but I will not give details

494
00:22:39,880 --> 00:22:42,760
Speaker 1: as they are mostly personal. Next day, I started packing

495
00:22:42,880 --> 00:22:46,359
Speaker 1: important things, and all of a sudden, my wife became

496
00:22:46,560 --> 00:22:51,160
Speaker 1: the most sexual person on the planet. She's pulling out

497
00:22:51,160 --> 00:22:51,800
Speaker 1: every stop.

498
00:22:51,920 --> 00:22:54,639
Speaker 2: Okay, but is she doing that just for like, to

499
00:22:54,760 --> 00:22:57,199
Speaker 2: keep him and not because it's actually something that she

500
00:22:57,320 --> 00:22:58,040
Speaker 2: can you know.

501
00:22:58,119 --> 00:23:00,200
Speaker 1: She wants I probably.

502
00:22:59,760 --> 00:23:03,080
Speaker 2: Well, yeah, it seems like it, which is.

503
00:23:02,520 --> 00:23:08,439
Speaker 1: The guy like almost like she's finally realized this is

504
00:23:08,480 --> 00:23:11,840
Speaker 1: actually important to him and she's putting in the work.

505
00:23:11,880 --> 00:23:14,040
Speaker 2: Which is I mean, is still not It's not. It

506
00:23:14,040 --> 00:23:17,040
Speaker 2: doesn't fix the problem because if it's not something that

507
00:23:17,080 --> 00:23:18,000
Speaker 2: she actually.

508
00:23:17,680 --> 00:23:19,600
Speaker 1: Wants, yeah, just a decline over time.

509
00:23:19,720 --> 00:23:21,359
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's just going to go back to it because

510
00:23:21,400 --> 00:23:24,680
Speaker 2: she she doesn't actually have that same like desire desire.

511
00:23:25,040 --> 00:23:29,280
Speaker 1: But she came to me with lingerie sex toys, costumes

512
00:23:29,320 --> 00:23:31,159
Speaker 1: and approached me. I am going to be honest. I

513
00:23:31,160 --> 00:23:34,360
Speaker 1: had a very hard time resisting but rejected her advances

514
00:23:34,400 --> 00:23:37,000
Speaker 1: every time. She is the woman I love and desire,

515
00:23:37,040 --> 00:23:38,720
Speaker 1: after all, but I do not think staying in this

516
00:23:38,800 --> 00:23:41,440
Speaker 1: marriage will be healthy for either of us. Stay strong, op,

517
00:23:41,680 --> 00:23:45,560
Speaker 1: stay strong. I'm currently staying at a hotel, Sophia.

518
00:23:46,040 --> 00:23:47,880
Speaker 2: Sorry, I'm making the game plans.

519
00:23:47,920 --> 00:23:49,520
Speaker 1: I'm making what game plans?

520
00:23:49,560 --> 00:23:51,600
Speaker 2: Okay, I didn't know you were reading it on here.

521
00:23:51,880 --> 00:23:54,560
Speaker 1: I literally tell you read.

522
00:23:56,760 --> 00:23:58,400
Speaker 2: Reading.

523
00:23:58,640 --> 00:24:01,040
Speaker 1: Oh my goodness, I'm curly staying at a hotel with

524
00:24:01,080 --> 00:24:04,240
Speaker 1: my important belongings. I changed my passwords and handled other

525
00:24:04,320 --> 00:24:07,119
Speaker 1: shared things. My sister will come next week to get me,

526
00:24:07,240 --> 00:24:09,359
Speaker 1: and I believe I'll be staying at her place in

527
00:24:09,400 --> 00:24:11,359
Speaker 1: our hometown for a while, at least until the beds

528
00:24:11,400 --> 00:24:14,160
Speaker 1: and furnitures are delivered to the house. Some redditors pointed

529
00:24:14,200 --> 00:24:16,080
Speaker 1: out that she may be cheating on me, but she

530
00:24:16,119 --> 00:24:18,240
Speaker 1: did not give me reason to be suspicious of her.

531
00:24:18,440 --> 00:24:20,920
Speaker 1: I trust her fully. I just wish she was more

532
00:24:20,960 --> 00:24:23,440
Speaker 1: combatible in the intimacy department. She's trying to reach out

533
00:24:23,440 --> 00:24:25,040
Speaker 1: to me, but I reject her calls and do not

534
00:24:25,080 --> 00:24:27,119
Speaker 1: read her text. I may need a few days of

535
00:24:27,200 --> 00:24:30,600
Speaker 1: peace in silence to get myself ready for everything upcoming.

536
00:24:30,720 --> 00:24:33,600
Speaker 1: Thank you for the advices and suggestions. The last thread

537
00:24:33,760 --> 00:24:35,399
Speaker 1: take air. There are some relevant comments.

538
00:24:35,440 --> 00:24:37,600
Speaker 2: Okay, we woo wait, just to be clear, is she

539
00:24:37,640 --> 00:24:38,240
Speaker 2: pregnant or not?

540
00:24:38,280 --> 00:24:39,080
Speaker 1: Because we don't know.

541
00:24:39,160 --> 00:24:40,080
Speaker 2: Okay, we don't know. We don't know.

542
00:24:40,240 --> 00:24:44,600
Speaker 1: We don't know. John, what do you think? Damn John,

543
00:24:44,680 --> 00:24:47,720
Speaker 1: get it together? This is crazy, John. You're tired, John,

544
00:24:47,760 --> 00:24:49,720
Speaker 1: You're so tired. Oh yeah it is. It is five

545
00:24:49,880 --> 00:24:53,720
Speaker 1: thirty nine. You probably I've been heah, John, John, John

546
00:24:53,760 --> 00:24:55,720
Speaker 1: needs his beauty sleep. He needs to go to that

547
00:24:55,760 --> 00:24:56,360
Speaker 1: retirement home.

548
00:24:56,400 --> 00:24:57,600
Speaker 2: But there is relevant comments.

549
00:24:57,640 --> 00:25:00,639
Speaker 1: There's a relevant comments. So Relvin comments, oh on what

550
00:25:00,720 --> 00:25:03,600
Speaker 1: he plans to do once the divorce is finalized. Op

551
00:25:03,840 --> 00:25:05,880
Speaker 1: dating is not the first thing in my mind right now.

552
00:25:05,920 --> 00:25:07,600
Speaker 1: I need to settle in the new house, get used

553
00:25:07,600 --> 00:25:09,520
Speaker 1: to it. And I'm in the process of changing jobs

554
00:25:09,560 --> 00:25:11,679
Speaker 1: after my notice. I need to handle these things to

555
00:25:11,720 --> 00:25:14,600
Speaker 1: consider dating. Also, I do not think I will have

556
00:25:14,680 --> 00:25:17,399
Speaker 1: a hard time meeting with new people for the dating.

557
00:25:17,480 --> 00:25:19,199
Speaker 1: Her part, I do not know, and I do not

558
00:25:19,240 --> 00:25:22,520
Speaker 1: think it's realistic. Ether commentary, well done for being strong

559
00:25:22,600 --> 00:25:25,199
Speaker 1: when she confronted you with everything you had been wishing

560
00:25:25,280 --> 00:25:28,000
Speaker 1: she would This was a good choice. Giving in would

561
00:25:28,000 --> 00:25:30,600
Speaker 1: have prolonged this cul de sac in both of your

562
00:25:30,640 --> 00:25:33,520
Speaker 1: lives and cause lots of harm in the end. And

563
00:25:33,600 --> 00:25:36,120
Speaker 1: New number seven eight one zero says, it's a little

564
00:25:36,119 --> 00:25:38,600
Speaker 1: insulting that your ex wife only became open to spikey

565
00:25:38,640 --> 00:25:41,800
Speaker 1: sleep after you gave her divorce papers. It showed that

566
00:25:41,880 --> 00:25:44,919
Speaker 1: she could have made an effort, but consciously chose not to.

567
00:25:45,119 --> 00:25:47,800
Speaker 1: She considers her happiness worth the effort, but not yours.

568
00:25:47,840 --> 00:25:49,920
Speaker 1: Proceeding with divorce is the right thing to do. You're

569
00:25:50,000 --> 00:25:52,679
Speaker 1: not the problem your ex is. You can find happiness

570
00:25:52,720 --> 00:25:55,119
Speaker 1: with someone else. That's the other. That story just the

571
00:25:55,240 --> 00:25:55,840
Speaker 1: end of the story.

572
00:25:56,080 --> 00:25:58,400
Speaker 2: Well that's saying that story. And I think when you're

573
00:25:58,400 --> 00:26:00,680
Speaker 2: schmecktually incompactively.

574
00:26:00,040 --> 00:26:01,679
Speaker 1: When you're spicy sleeping compatible.

575
00:26:01,800 --> 00:26:04,240
Speaker 2: Yeah, sometimes you just can't you can't work that out,

576
00:26:04,240 --> 00:26:05,720
Speaker 2: which is not I mean, I don't think that's a

577
00:26:05,760 --> 00:26:09,320
Speaker 2: fault on. It's I fault her or her lack of

578
00:26:09,680 --> 00:26:11,560
Speaker 2: wanting to communicate.

579
00:26:11,000 --> 00:26:13,000
Speaker 1: About it and manipulating Opie to stay.

580
00:26:13,200 --> 00:26:15,560
Speaker 2: Yes, that I would choose a the a hole for that.

581
00:26:15,800 --> 00:26:17,840
Speaker 2: I don't fault her for the lack of it, the

582
00:26:17,920 --> 00:26:21,480
Speaker 2: lack of that desire that is normal thing for different people.

583
00:26:21,760 --> 00:26:24,480
Speaker 2: But it's the lack of communication and that is not

584
00:26:24,520 --> 00:26:24,920
Speaker 2: fair too.

585
00:26:25,240 --> 00:26:27,040
Speaker 1: Okay, Yeah, well John, what do you think? What do

586
00:26:27,080 --> 00:26:28,760
Speaker 1: you think? John?

587
00:26:28,880 --> 00:26:29,040
Speaker 4: Wait?

588
00:26:29,160 --> 00:26:34,200
Speaker 1: God, John Jehan, you can't be sleeping right now. We'll

589
00:26:34,240 --> 00:26:37,439
Speaker 1: get back to John. Yeah. Anyway, is that the end

590
00:26:37,440 --> 00:26:38,160
Speaker 1: of that episode?

591
00:26:38,320 --> 00:26:40,000
Speaker 2: That is the end of that episode, and.

592
00:26:39,920 --> 00:26:43,280
Speaker 1: I think the end of the stream. Sophia is tired.

593
00:26:43,320 --> 00:26:47,200
Speaker 1: She's been going tired. Okay, if you love us, make

594
00:26:47,240 --> 00:26:50,600
Speaker 1: sure to subscribe We love you and see it tomorrow.

595
00:26:52,760 --> 00:26:55,240
Speaker 1: This is an episode from Deep within the Archives. Time

596
00:26:55,280 --> 00:27:01,440
Speaker 1: for okop relam. My wife gave birth to a bi

597
00:27:01,560 --> 00:27:05,160
Speaker 1: racial baby, which clearly isn't mine and I want a divorce,

598
00:27:05,520 --> 00:27:07,800
Speaker 1: but what she did next made it near impossible.

599
00:27:08,800 --> 00:27:10,959
Speaker 5: Let's see what is going to happen here.

600
00:27:11,400 --> 00:27:14,440
Speaker 1: A month ago, my wife gave birth to a black

601
00:27:14,560 --> 00:27:17,560
Speaker 1: baby girl. We are both white.

602
00:27:18,440 --> 00:27:21,240
Speaker 5: That's I mean, coming out of the gate, that's that's

603
00:27:21,320 --> 00:27:23,600
Speaker 5: that's a big accusation, Like, how are you sure?

604
00:27:24,119 --> 00:27:30,080
Speaker 1: Is my initial? Well, you know, I'm no, I'm no geneticist. Yeah, no,

605
00:27:30,960 --> 00:27:36,040
Speaker 1: I'm no nos domis. I'm I'm not even a domas.

606
00:27:36,720 --> 00:27:41,560
Speaker 1: I don't. I don't know shit, but uh, it seems

607
00:27:41,600 --> 00:27:46,159
Speaker 1: like there might be some something. So she was forced

608
00:27:46,160 --> 00:27:48,119
Speaker 1: to admit that the child was a result of a

609
00:27:48,160 --> 00:27:49,520
Speaker 1: one night stand last year.

610
00:27:50,080 --> 00:27:55,359
Speaker 5: Oh y, so she just came out the gate like

611
00:27:56,040 --> 00:27:56,720
Speaker 5: this happened.

612
00:27:57,080 --> 00:28:03,880
Speaker 1: Yeah. Also, man's shooting bullets from one night stand, one

613
00:28:03,960 --> 00:28:07,560
Speaker 1: night stand instapregnant man shooting bullets his.

614
00:28:07,240 --> 00:28:09,840
Speaker 5: His swimmers with his swimmers would beat Michael Phelps.

615
00:28:09,920 --> 00:28:13,400
Speaker 1: I know, man good gravy. So I started the divorce proceedings,

616
00:28:13,400 --> 00:28:16,440
Speaker 1: although we're still living together for now. Between our two

617
00:28:16,520 --> 00:28:19,520
Speaker 1: boys aged two and four, I've had paternity tests for

618
00:28:19,560 --> 00:28:21,200
Speaker 1: them and they came back positive.

619
00:28:21,320 --> 00:28:22,879
Speaker 5: Okay, so those kids are his.

620
00:28:23,119 --> 00:28:26,040
Speaker 1: Okay. Between our two boys age two and four, I've

621
00:28:26,040 --> 00:28:28,040
Speaker 1: had paternity tests done for them and they came back positive.

622
00:28:28,440 --> 00:28:31,479
Speaker 1: Her infant daughter and her having lost her job to COVID.

623
00:28:31,680 --> 00:28:35,159
Speaker 1: Living together as amicably as possible until the divorce is

624
00:28:35,160 --> 00:28:37,760
Speaker 1: settled is an unfortunate necessity.

625
00:28:37,400 --> 00:28:41,200
Speaker 5: Right, so he can't just like kick technically could, but

626
00:28:41,280 --> 00:28:42,840
Speaker 5: she'd be like her and the baby.

627
00:28:43,000 --> 00:28:45,720
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's bad. That's bad. Okay, Naturally, I have no

628
00:28:45,880 --> 00:28:49,240
Speaker 1: ill will towards the baby, and I've been disgusted by

629
00:28:49,240 --> 00:28:51,680
Speaker 1: some of the comments I've heard from family members, friends

630
00:28:51,720 --> 00:28:54,440
Speaker 1: and coworkers and others, all who seem to be fixated

631
00:28:54,520 --> 00:28:57,400
Speaker 1: on the racial angle of this awful, as if the

632
00:28:57,400 --> 00:28:59,720
Speaker 1: most salient part of this isn't that my wife cheated

633
00:28:59,720 --> 00:29:01,840
Speaker 1: but some how it's with a black guy and that

634
00:29:01,880 --> 00:29:05,040
Speaker 1: the baby is black. But honestly, like this is that's

635
00:29:05,080 --> 00:29:08,120
Speaker 1: not that. What matters. What matters is the infidelity. And

636
00:29:08,240 --> 00:29:11,040
Speaker 1: also I love how like the husband is still trying

637
00:29:11,080 --> 00:29:13,240
Speaker 1: to like do right by life and by the kid.

638
00:29:13,680 --> 00:29:17,040
Speaker 1: But like, hot, damn, he should have you know, seen

639
00:29:17,120 --> 00:29:20,640
Speaker 1: this coming. Yes, you should have researched her beforehand or something.

640
00:29:20,800 --> 00:29:23,120
Speaker 5: Yeah, exactly. You can use public data check just to

641
00:29:23,120 --> 00:29:24,080
Speaker 5: be sure, you know what I mean.

642
00:29:24,200 --> 00:29:26,080
Speaker 1: Yeah, you can look up people as like real names,

643
00:29:26,120 --> 00:29:29,760
Speaker 1: their addresses, criminal records, any skeletons that might be in

644
00:29:29,760 --> 00:29:30,680
Speaker 1: the closet exactly.

645
00:29:30,720 --> 00:29:33,000
Speaker 5: So if you have someone that you're not too sure about,

646
00:29:33,280 --> 00:29:35,640
Speaker 5: use public data check dot com or check our biolink.

647
00:29:36,080 --> 00:29:39,880
Speaker 1: Oh well, back to the stories. So what really worries me,

648
00:29:40,040 --> 00:29:42,800
Speaker 1: this is from Opie's perspective and my two sons, is

649
00:29:42,800 --> 00:29:44,640
Speaker 1: that they might pick up on these narratives, like these

650
00:29:44,640 --> 00:29:46,760
Speaker 1: things that are going on. Right, they're too young to

651
00:29:46,800 --> 00:29:49,200
Speaker 1: really understand what's happening now, But I'm worried that as

652
00:29:49,200 --> 00:29:51,960
Speaker 1: they grow to understand the situation, that they might grow

653
00:29:52,000 --> 00:29:55,680
Speaker 1: to resent their half sister for breaking up their parents' marriage.

654
00:29:55,760 --> 00:29:59,600
Speaker 5: Oh yeah, wow, I didn't even that didn't cross my mind.

655
00:30:00,080 --> 00:30:05,080
Speaker 1: He's thinking ahead, due, he's thinking, he's thinking, so, I mean,

656
00:30:05,120 --> 00:30:07,400
Speaker 1: for everything that's going on, he's thinking very clearly and

657
00:30:07,520 --> 00:30:10,160
Speaker 1: very empathetically, which is really cool. Yes, and worse, the

658
00:30:10,280 --> 00:30:14,320
Speaker 1: resentment might express itself in a racist fashion. Yeah, under

659
00:30:14,320 --> 00:30:16,840
Speaker 1: the influence of the aforementioned racist narratives. Right, Like if

660
00:30:16,880 --> 00:30:19,720
Speaker 1: all the coworkers and family are saying racist, then it's

661
00:30:19,760 --> 00:30:22,800
Speaker 1: like the kids can't pick up on it. Yeah, damn,

662
00:30:22,800 --> 00:30:24,600
Speaker 1: he's like playing forty chess over here.

663
00:30:24,680 --> 00:30:25,959
Speaker 5: Yes, as he should be.

664
00:30:26,120 --> 00:30:28,160
Speaker 1: Any thoughts on how I should try to influence my

665
00:30:28,240 --> 00:30:30,720
Speaker 1: sons away from that perspective. It probably doesn't help that

666
00:30:30,720 --> 00:30:32,680
Speaker 1: we live in a suburb with very few black people

667
00:30:32,800 --> 00:30:34,960
Speaker 1: and their half sister is really the only black person

668
00:30:35,040 --> 00:30:39,680
Speaker 1: my children. No, oh boy, yikes, Oh man, I don't

669
00:30:39,680 --> 00:30:43,360
Speaker 1: know what, but just really quickly, Yeah, there is an

670
00:30:43,400 --> 00:30:45,640
Speaker 1: updates before we get into it. I can I hear

671
00:30:45,680 --> 00:30:46,320
Speaker 1: what you think.

672
00:30:46,200 --> 00:30:49,000
Speaker 5: One hundred percent. He should sit both of them down

673
00:30:49,360 --> 00:30:52,840
Speaker 5: and like explain it, probably multiple times when as they

674
00:30:52,840 --> 00:30:57,760
Speaker 5: grow up you think, like now probably uh if they don't,

675
00:30:58,120 --> 00:31:02,000
Speaker 5: so if he starts seeing anything, he should do it immediately. Yeah,

676
00:31:02,200 --> 00:31:04,160
Speaker 5: there's no reason why not to do it immediately, But

677
00:31:04,160 --> 00:31:06,960
Speaker 5: you got to do it multiple times because they won't

678
00:31:07,160 --> 00:31:11,000
Speaker 5: undersmember now. But the subconscious biases can like sink in

679
00:31:11,160 --> 00:31:13,360
Speaker 5: orly and be carried out. So so you have.

680
00:31:13,320 --> 00:31:15,520
Speaker 1: Like like do you check in two and four, like

681
00:31:15,560 --> 00:31:17,920
Speaker 1: the like the two year old version of like, hey,

682
00:31:18,280 --> 00:31:21,920
Speaker 1: you know, mommy and daddy are are going to live separately.

683
00:31:23,400 --> 00:31:27,120
Speaker 1: This is your half sister. You know she might not

684
00:31:27,160 --> 00:31:30,479
Speaker 1: look like you, but she is your sister, and uh,

685
00:31:30,880 --> 00:31:32,800
Speaker 1: and like you should Yeah, there's no reason there's no

686
00:31:32,840 --> 00:31:34,400
Speaker 1: reason that you should have loved her the same way.

687
00:31:34,480 --> 00:31:36,800
Speaker 1: You love her, feel angry at her, or feel anything

688
00:31:37,080 --> 00:31:39,960
Speaker 1: like you know that wasn't And I think just having

689
00:31:39,960 --> 00:31:44,400
Speaker 1: that conversation like multiple times that's super smart. I've actually

690
00:31:44,400 --> 00:31:46,600
Speaker 1: never thought about like I've always thought of that, like oh,

691
00:31:46,640 --> 00:31:48,480
Speaker 1: like when you had the sex talk with your kids, yeah,

692
00:31:48,600 --> 00:31:51,080
Speaker 1: or like stuff like that. Yeah, but like you can

693
00:31:51,200 --> 00:31:53,560
Speaker 1: you can just have that conversation multiple times at different levels.

694
00:31:53,640 --> 00:31:57,280
Speaker 5: Yeah, because I'm sure different scenarios require of this thing.

695
00:31:57,320 --> 00:31:58,840
Speaker 5: But this I think he has gonna be careful of

696
00:31:59,240 --> 00:32:01,840
Speaker 5: any subconscious sinking in it.

697
00:32:01,920 --> 00:32:03,160
Speaker 1: Now, do it early and then.

698
00:32:03,120 --> 00:32:06,120
Speaker 5: Just keep just do it, and they'll obviously understand way

699
00:32:06,120 --> 00:32:09,640
Speaker 5: more once they're probably like eight, nine, ten, eleven, they'll

700
00:32:09,800 --> 00:32:13,400
Speaker 5: start it'll actually click exactly what he's what he's saying.

701
00:32:13,520 --> 00:32:15,720
Speaker 1: So there is an update. Oh. The big takeaway for

702
00:32:15,840 --> 00:32:18,560
Speaker 1: me was that I'd need to lead by example here,

703
00:32:18,680 --> 00:32:21,200
Speaker 1: not excluding her in any way because of her paternity,

704
00:32:21,320 --> 00:32:23,400
Speaker 1: so that she and my sons would see her as

705
00:32:23,440 --> 00:32:24,760
Speaker 1: a full member of the family.

706
00:32:25,200 --> 00:32:28,640
Speaker 5: That's great, Honestly, I've this approach is great. He's listening,

707
00:32:28,720 --> 00:32:30,560
Speaker 5: he's asking very smart.

708
00:32:30,680 --> 00:32:33,400
Speaker 1: Also, I need to be more active in confronting the

709
00:32:33,400 --> 00:32:36,200
Speaker 1: bigoted and ignorant nonsense I've been hearing and teach my

710
00:32:36,240 --> 00:32:38,760
Speaker 1: son to do the same and to protect their sister.

711
00:32:38,920 --> 00:32:40,000
Speaker 5: Yes, definitely.

712
00:32:40,240 --> 00:32:43,080
Speaker 1: I spoken to some of those responsible since and made

713
00:32:43,160 --> 00:32:45,360
Speaker 1: clear of my feelings on this and that she is

714
00:32:45,400 --> 00:32:47,480
Speaker 1: to be treated as a member of the family. And

715
00:32:47,520 --> 00:32:50,120
Speaker 1: if I find out that they've ever said things like

716
00:32:50,160 --> 00:32:52,520
Speaker 1: that to my sons or their sister, that they won't

717
00:32:52,520 --> 00:32:55,240
Speaker 1: be allowed around us anymore. Good. So what you gotta do.

718
00:32:55,480 --> 00:32:57,680
Speaker 1: I've spoken to my wife about this. I love he's

719
00:32:57,720 --> 00:33:01,800
Speaker 1: still calling her his wife. Men's I kind of hear

720
00:33:02,160 --> 00:33:04,600
Speaker 1: people do that sometimes. Yeah, it's rough. I mean, when

721
00:33:04,640 --> 00:33:06,440
Speaker 1: you think of someone for so long as your wife

722
00:33:06,480 --> 00:33:08,680
Speaker 1: like it, I give it shed and we're more and

723
00:33:08,760 --> 00:33:11,520
Speaker 1: less on the same page. She's been begging me to

724
00:33:11,560 --> 00:33:14,200
Speaker 1: forgive her and not go through with the divorce, but

725
00:33:14,240 --> 00:33:16,720
Speaker 1: that's not going to happen. Even if I didn't consider

726
00:33:16,760 --> 00:33:19,800
Speaker 1: the cheating unforgivable, I just don't feel any love for

727
00:33:19,840 --> 00:33:22,560
Speaker 1: her anymore other than the platonic affection for her as

728
00:33:22,600 --> 00:33:25,440
Speaker 1: the mother of my children. My sons are handling this

729
00:33:25,520 --> 00:33:27,520
Speaker 1: as well as can be expected. My four year old

730
00:33:27,520 --> 00:33:30,000
Speaker 1: doesn't fully understand, but is upset by the change in

731
00:33:30,040 --> 00:33:34,440
Speaker 1: the household. Thankfully, he's easily distracted by Yeah, give him

732
00:33:34,480 --> 00:33:39,640
Speaker 1: like some three DS. That's dating mere D.

733
00:33:39,920 --> 00:33:40,760
Speaker 5: I guess that is dated.

734
00:33:40,800 --> 00:33:45,720
Speaker 1: Huh psp, Yeah, that's old, that's old ship.

735
00:33:45,920 --> 00:33:49,200
Speaker 5: I remember the thing with A or D s. DS

736
00:33:49,240 --> 00:33:53,520
Speaker 5: was the first one D and I remember it was

737
00:33:53,560 --> 00:33:56,880
Speaker 5: like you could send like written messages or something with

738
00:33:56,920 --> 00:34:00,000
Speaker 5: like people in your area, and that's how certain things start.

739
00:34:00,000 --> 00:34:05,040
Speaker 5: Hearted what between kids? You know, you give a you know,

740
00:34:05,080 --> 00:34:08,360
Speaker 5: a twelve year old coming into puberty, no way away

741
00:34:08,719 --> 00:34:10,799
Speaker 5: or just like messaging each other, you know what I mean,

742
00:34:11,000 --> 00:34:14,160
Speaker 5: like flirting and like you idea. I never had any

743
00:34:14,480 --> 00:34:16,759
Speaker 5: that was like I didn't have a DS. What I

744
00:34:18,120 --> 00:34:18,800
Speaker 5: I witnessed?

745
00:34:18,880 --> 00:34:21,400
Speaker 1: Whoa I like drawn? Like dirty pictures.

746
00:34:21,440 --> 00:34:24,040
Speaker 5: They're just like, yeah, getting getting freaky with it. Whoa

747
00:34:24,120 --> 00:34:24,960
Speaker 5: O G sexting?

748
00:34:25,719 --> 00:34:28,320
Speaker 1: No way, that's crazy. My two year old is thankfully

749
00:34:28,360 --> 00:34:30,720
Speaker 1: too young to comprehend what's going on, but has definitely

750
00:34:30,719 --> 00:34:33,239
Speaker 1: picked up on how withdrawn his mother has become. They're

751
00:34:33,239 --> 00:34:36,160
Speaker 1: both fascinated with their new little sister, So there's that

752
00:34:36,280 --> 00:34:39,560
Speaker 1: silver lining. That's good. My wife isn't in good shape

753
00:34:39,760 --> 00:34:43,040
Speaker 1: at all. She's depressed even before birth and now with

754
00:34:43,160 --> 00:34:46,040
Speaker 1: everything or divorced or infidelity being revealed in the backlash

755
00:34:46,080 --> 00:34:49,839
Speaker 1: from family and friends, postpartum depression, and the exhaustion from

756
00:34:49,880 --> 00:34:53,439
Speaker 1: raising an infant. She's barely functional. Oh man, she's seeing

757
00:34:53,440 --> 00:34:55,840
Speaker 1: a therapist, and I've been pressuring some of our family

758
00:34:55,880 --> 00:34:58,319
Speaker 1: and friends to be supportive of her, because even if

759
00:34:58,360 --> 00:35:00,560
Speaker 1: they think she deserves it in her current state, it's

760
00:35:00,560 --> 00:35:02,240
Speaker 1: still making it harder for me and our children.

761
00:35:02,320 --> 00:35:04,960
Speaker 5: Yeah, it makes sense. It's like why he get her

762
00:35:04,960 --> 00:35:08,600
Speaker 5: to understand the error for ways and growth from it. Like, no, Like,

763
00:35:09,080 --> 00:35:10,919
Speaker 5: I don't think continually punishing so much.

764
00:35:10,920 --> 00:35:12,480
Speaker 1: She still has to be the mother to that other

765
00:35:12,920 --> 00:35:14,680
Speaker 1: exact two kids. So you don't want her to like

766
00:35:14,719 --> 00:35:19,520
Speaker 1: completely just go off the rails, right, She needs some support. Also,

767
00:35:19,560 --> 00:35:22,919
Speaker 1: I'm just realizing right now, like he didn't find out

768
00:35:23,000 --> 00:35:26,719
Speaker 1: until the baby was born. Like imagine being in the

769
00:35:26,760 --> 00:35:30,000
Speaker 1: waiting room or in the in the birthing room, I

770
00:35:30,040 --> 00:35:32,480
Speaker 1: don't know what they call it, and like you're just like,

771
00:35:33,200 --> 00:35:37,759
Speaker 1: that's not my baby, dude, that would be fucked that

772
00:35:38,120 --> 00:35:40,480
Speaker 1: really I didn't even think about because you.

773
00:35:40,520 --> 00:35:45,000
Speaker 5: Have because there's the delivery room. But for nine months, yeah,

774
00:35:45,080 --> 00:35:47,520
Speaker 5: up to it, that's my kid, this is your child.

775
00:35:47,600 --> 00:35:49,879
Speaker 5: You're getting ready like you're just mentally and then that

776
00:35:50,120 --> 00:35:54,280
Speaker 5: like that switch up is just insane?

777
00:35:54,280 --> 00:35:58,680
Speaker 1: Can you imagine? And so that would be so fucked wow.

778
00:35:59,000 --> 00:36:01,239
Speaker 1: It's become very obvious to me that even athlete and

779
00:36:01,239 --> 00:36:03,400
Speaker 1: divorce is finalized, we're going to have to live together

780
00:36:03,440 --> 00:36:05,880
Speaker 1: for a while. She's in no shape to be taking

781
00:36:05,920 --> 00:36:08,680
Speaker 1: care of three kids without someone else around to support her,

782
00:36:08,880 --> 00:36:10,880
Speaker 1: and I'm not willing to deprive her of her sons

783
00:36:10,920 --> 00:36:13,839
Speaker 1: by seeking soul custody. It's also too difficult financially. She's

784
00:36:13,840 --> 00:36:15,600
Speaker 1: lost her job because of COVID. Like what you gotta

785
00:36:15,640 --> 00:36:16,200
Speaker 1: do again?

786
00:36:16,640 --> 00:36:18,920
Speaker 5: Salute to you, Opie. This is good stuff.

787
00:36:19,200 --> 00:36:21,640
Speaker 1: As for the baby girl, she's healthy and fairly easy

788
00:36:21,640 --> 00:36:24,520
Speaker 1: by baby standards. Since I've been helping take care for her,

789
00:36:24,560 --> 00:36:27,160
Speaker 1: I've bonded with her, and I've discussed the possibility of

790
00:36:27,200 --> 00:36:29,920
Speaker 1: adopting her with my wife. She can't contact the father,

791
00:36:30,200 --> 00:36:32,120
Speaker 1: as the only thing she knows about him is his

792
00:36:32,200 --> 00:36:35,200
Speaker 1: first name, damn bro.

793
00:36:35,440 --> 00:36:43,400
Speaker 5: Come on, Opie's wife, come on, Oh god, oh watched

794
00:36:43,480 --> 00:36:44,640
Speaker 5: that name be a fake name?

795
00:36:45,200 --> 00:36:49,120
Speaker 1: Yeah? Damn Bro. And given our co parenting situation, it

796
00:36:49,160 --> 00:36:51,520
Speaker 1: feels like adopting her as my daughter would be the

797
00:36:51,520 --> 00:36:55,160
Speaker 1: best outcome for all involved. However, there's been a wrench

798
00:36:55,280 --> 00:36:57,520
Speaker 1: thrown in that plan. It was brought to my attention

799
00:36:57,960 --> 00:37:00,480
Speaker 1: that there may be a way of finding the baby father,

800
00:37:00,880 --> 00:37:04,920
Speaker 1: namely by having her DNA tested by ancestry DNA. If

801
00:37:04,920 --> 00:37:07,120
Speaker 1: the father or one of the relatives is also taken

802
00:37:07,160 --> 00:37:09,399
Speaker 1: the test, we may be able to find him through

803
00:37:09,480 --> 00:37:13,240
Speaker 1: the DNA match database. Aha. If I'm being completely honest,

804
00:37:13,280 --> 00:37:15,399
Speaker 1: I'm not happy about this. I've already started to think

805
00:37:15,520 --> 00:37:18,000
Speaker 1: of this baby girl as my daughter, and having him

806
00:37:18,040 --> 00:37:21,839
Speaker 1: in our lives would massively complicate the family dynamic. Plus,

807
00:37:21,880 --> 00:37:24,240
Speaker 1: we live in Seattle and she met him in Philadelphia,

808
00:37:24,520 --> 00:37:27,120
Speaker 1: so god knows how they'd even make that work if

809
00:37:27,120 --> 00:37:29,360
Speaker 1: they wanted to. However, I recognize that this is a

810
00:37:29,360 --> 00:37:32,600
Speaker 1: selfish reaction. Man is being the most unselfish man in

811
00:37:32,680 --> 00:37:35,319
Speaker 1: the universe right here. If we have the chance of

812
00:37:35,320 --> 00:37:37,680
Speaker 1: finding her biological father, we owe it to her to

813
00:37:37,719 --> 00:37:40,240
Speaker 1: do so, if only so that she has the access

814
00:37:40,239 --> 00:37:42,520
Speaker 1: to her paternal medical history, and so she can have

815
00:37:42,520 --> 00:37:44,960
Speaker 1: a relationship with him if and when she chooses to

816
00:37:44,960 --> 00:37:47,879
Speaker 1: do so. I've read a few accounts by children raised

817
00:37:47,880 --> 00:37:50,719
Speaker 1: by non biological parents, and a common thread is their

818
00:37:50,760 --> 00:37:53,759
Speaker 1: desire to meet their loss biological parent. So that's that

819
00:37:54,120 --> 00:37:57,160
Speaker 1: We've ordered an ancestry DNA kit for her, and I

820
00:37:57,160 --> 00:37:59,640
Speaker 1: guess we'll decide on our next steps once we get

821
00:37:59,640 --> 00:38:01,560
Speaker 1: the result. It's back in a couple of months.

822
00:38:01,600 --> 00:38:07,799
Speaker 5: That's so challenging because it's like that person isn't expecting it.

823
00:38:08,200 --> 00:38:11,040
Speaker 5: You have no idea if he wants any interaction with

824
00:38:11,080 --> 00:38:14,120
Speaker 5: the kid or not, and it and just by introducing

825
00:38:14,160 --> 00:38:17,360
Speaker 5: it the family dynamic like you said, could yeah, you know,

826
00:38:17,520 --> 00:38:20,000
Speaker 5: so com you start fighting for or if he do

827
00:38:20,520 --> 00:38:22,200
Speaker 5: he does once it, then he can start fighting for

828
00:38:22,239 --> 00:38:26,040
Speaker 5: custody and then that you know, wow, that's.

829
00:38:25,880 --> 00:38:27,920
Speaker 1: This kid's is why you don't cheat in your marriage.

830
00:38:28,200 --> 00:38:28,879
Speaker 5: What would you do?

831
00:38:29,239 --> 00:38:32,920
Speaker 1: Would I do? I mean I think I think I

832
00:38:32,920 --> 00:38:35,160
Speaker 1: think we know what the right thing to do is. Yeah,

833
00:38:35,239 --> 00:38:36,920
Speaker 1: well is it? You know? Is it the right thing? Well?

834
00:38:36,920 --> 00:38:38,440
Speaker 1: So here it's it's like, well will it will it

835
00:38:38,520 --> 00:38:43,600
Speaker 1: hurt the will it hurt how this baby girl is

836
00:38:43,600 --> 00:38:44,240
Speaker 1: going to be raised?

837
00:38:44,520 --> 00:38:47,920
Speaker 5: I think I think it's fair to first do the

838
00:38:48,000 --> 00:38:51,080
Speaker 5: DNA test. But yeah, I guess it is the right

839
00:38:51,120 --> 00:38:56,680
Speaker 5: thing by the person, by the the person Opie's wife

840
00:38:56,760 --> 00:38:59,120
Speaker 5: cheated with, because at the end of the day. That

841
00:38:59,280 --> 00:39:02,439
Speaker 5: is their kid and they should know about it. But yeah,

842
00:39:02,480 --> 00:39:07,240
Speaker 5: it does, it does, PoTA. There's the risk of making

843
00:39:07,280 --> 00:39:09,960
Speaker 5: things just way lesser than the art. I guess, I

844
00:39:09,960 --> 00:39:13,319
Speaker 5: guess it is. Yeah, It's like I think in this

845
00:39:13,360 --> 00:39:14,960
Speaker 5: situation is who do you want to do right by?

846
00:39:15,239 --> 00:39:16,719
Speaker 5: Do you want to do right by the baby girl

847
00:39:17,000 --> 00:39:19,200
Speaker 5: or this or the guy? And I feel like it

848
00:39:19,280 --> 00:39:21,120
Speaker 5: might be more important to do right by the baby girl.

849
00:39:21,200 --> 00:39:25,520
Speaker 1: It should be. It's freaking complicated. Yeah, what would you do?

850
00:39:25,640 --> 00:39:25,879
Speaker 5: Yeah?

851
00:39:26,440 --> 00:39:29,440
Speaker 1: Comment below what you do and why, because I'm We're stumped.

852
00:39:29,480 --> 00:39:32,680
Speaker 1: We're stumped. I found underwear that isn't mine in my

853
00:39:32,880 --> 00:39:36,920
Speaker 1: boyfriend's drawer. Uh, that is not a good situation. No,

854
00:39:37,080 --> 00:39:40,960
Speaker 1: it is not, Samuel, look at this ispicious So I female,

855
00:39:41,000 --> 00:39:43,359
Speaker 1: twenty seven have been with my boyfriend, twenty eight, male

856
00:39:43,560 --> 00:39:46,120
Speaker 1: for four years. We've lived together for three of those year.

857
00:39:46,120 --> 00:39:48,600
Speaker 5: A few days ago, I was doing laundry as usual,

858
00:39:48,800 --> 00:39:51,880
Speaker 5: as usual, and I opened his underwear drawer and sitting

859
00:39:52,239 --> 00:39:58,680
Speaker 5: right on top was a pair of ladies undergarments that

860
00:39:58,719 --> 00:40:03,640
Speaker 5: are clearly not mine. What color they I'm guessing like

861
00:40:03,640 --> 00:40:06,680
Speaker 5: like a light pink with like little frills, light pink

862
00:40:06,760 --> 00:40:07,600
Speaker 5: with frills.

863
00:40:07,800 --> 00:40:10,359
Speaker 1: If only, if only Op had given us I want

864
00:40:10,400 --> 00:40:13,560
Speaker 1: I want descriptions of all right now, now that sounds weird,

865
00:40:14,840 --> 00:40:21,040
Speaker 1: guys from a story, guys all get all the details, but.

866
00:40:21,320 --> 00:40:23,919
Speaker 5: You yeah, little do you guys know that we've been

867
00:40:23,960 --> 00:40:28,759
Speaker 5: through actually extensive like vocal podcast training. We have to

868
00:40:28,880 --> 00:40:32,240
Speaker 5: very deeply describe things. Yes, this is professional coach.

869
00:40:32,680 --> 00:40:36,320
Speaker 1: We we are professionals, and we give you professional stories exactly.

870
00:40:37,280 --> 00:40:40,560
Speaker 5: But back to the story, Op says, I clearly knew

871
00:40:40,600 --> 00:40:43,480
Speaker 5: they weren't mine because they were extra small, which is

872
00:40:43,520 --> 00:40:44,360
Speaker 5: not and has.

873
00:40:44,280 --> 00:40:46,040
Speaker 1: Never been my size.

874
00:40:46,400 --> 00:40:49,960
Speaker 5: Oh my, and things were going really well in our relationship,

875
00:40:49,960 --> 00:40:51,840
Speaker 5: and I have no reason to think that he's cheating.

876
00:40:52,160 --> 00:40:54,560
Speaker 5: We both work from home and it would be extremely

877
00:40:54,560 --> 00:40:55,279
Speaker 5: hard to hide that.

878
00:40:55,560 --> 00:41:00,200
Speaker 1: I immediately asked him, calmly what they were at first, what

879
00:41:00,239 --> 00:41:06,480
Speaker 1: they were? He's gonna be like, it's a spatula. Now

880
00:41:06,560 --> 00:41:08,759
Speaker 1: you know what it is, bro, it's the worst game

881
00:41:08,800 --> 00:41:12,560
Speaker 1: of jeopardy ever, what is this object? Or actually know

882
00:41:12,560 --> 00:41:15,360
Speaker 1: it's the reverse? Yeah, yeah, it's like, what is panties?

883
00:41:16,280 --> 00:41:18,440
Speaker 5: At first he lied and said that he didn't know.

884
00:41:19,120 --> 00:41:21,839
Speaker 5: Then he admitted he found them on the floor next

885
00:41:21,840 --> 00:41:24,720
Speaker 5: to the washer after he went back there to retrieve

886
00:41:24,800 --> 00:41:27,920
Speaker 5: some socks that he dropped. Now, the thing is, we

887
00:41:27,960 --> 00:41:30,680
Speaker 5: have our own washer and dryer in our apartment, so

888
00:41:30,760 --> 00:41:33,400
Speaker 5: this is not I I thought like, oh, this is

889
00:41:33,400 --> 00:41:34,320
Speaker 5: going to be like a building.

890
00:41:34,760 --> 00:41:38,880
Speaker 1: It's their own private washer dryer. That makes it very suspicious.

891
00:41:39,000 --> 00:41:42,760
Speaker 1: That makes it very suspicious. Right, why you washing some panties? Man? Now?

892
00:41:42,960 --> 00:41:45,680
Speaker 1: The other thing is it's in our shared guest bathroom

893
00:41:45,960 --> 00:41:48,200
Speaker 1: and we share it with just our roommates. So the

894
00:41:48,200 --> 00:41:50,000
Speaker 1: only other possible person is the roommate. Oh so it

895
00:41:50,040 --> 00:41:51,600
Speaker 1: could be the roommate could be Okay.

896
00:41:51,680 --> 00:41:54,760
Speaker 5: I pressed that they are not mine, and he admitted

897
00:41:54,840 --> 00:41:58,279
Speaker 5: he knew that, but he likes sniffing undergarments, if you

898
00:41:58,560 --> 00:41:59,319
Speaker 5: catch my drift.

899
00:41:59,440 --> 00:42:02,440
Speaker 1: Wait wait wait I was not ready for that third

900
00:42:02,520 --> 00:42:04,840
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah yeah, wait so does he know? Does she

901
00:42:05,040 --> 00:42:10,320
Speaker 1: know her man's has this this uh sniffing fantasy only

902
00:42:10,560 --> 00:42:13,719
Speaker 1: only now this is the first time. Oh what a

903
00:42:13,760 --> 00:42:16,600
Speaker 1: way to find out, like truly true, dude. I don't

904
00:42:16,640 --> 00:42:19,440
Speaker 1: know if you know this. I will not for this reason,

905
00:42:19,600 --> 00:42:21,520
Speaker 1: but I want to go to Japan and I was

906
00:42:21,560 --> 00:42:29,640
Speaker 1: doing research. Right, Well, there are these vending machines where

907
00:42:29,840 --> 00:42:35,759
Speaker 1: you can buy use panties wow. Yeah, and like these

908
00:42:35,800 --> 00:42:39,200
Speaker 1: like like like Japanese businessmen will go and buy them

909
00:42:39,200 --> 00:42:41,680
Speaker 1: and sniff them. Wow. Yeah, because I I don't know

910
00:42:41,760 --> 00:42:44,239
Speaker 1: where I was reading in some book and it was

911
00:42:44,360 --> 00:42:47,359
Speaker 1: like cultures that are the cleanest on the surface are

912
00:42:47,400 --> 00:42:51,560
Speaker 1: like the dirtiest underneath, you know what I mean? Dirty dirty, Yeah,

913
00:42:51,719 --> 00:42:54,880
Speaker 1: it's dirty dirty, like like very clean and respectful, like,

914
00:42:54,920 --> 00:42:58,800
Speaker 1: whereas American culture maybe or like like American culture is

915
00:42:58,840 --> 00:43:01,759
Speaker 1: a little bit more like up front, and we're not

916
00:43:01,800 --> 00:43:04,560
Speaker 1: as like prude, I mean ish, we're kind of we're

917
00:43:04,600 --> 00:43:07,440
Speaker 1: kind a little bit to the Europeans. We're way more prude.

918
00:43:07,560 --> 00:43:10,160
Speaker 5: Yeah you're right, you're right, but we're like in the middle, right, Yeah,

919
00:43:10,200 --> 00:43:12,480
Speaker 5: I guess we're more than Japanese. And then so basically

920
00:43:12,480 --> 00:43:13,320
Speaker 5: the book was saying.

921
00:43:13,320 --> 00:43:16,640
Speaker 1: As Americans, we believe we are the normal. Yeah, and

922
00:43:16,719 --> 00:43:19,319
Speaker 1: like they it mentioned Germans as well. Germans are again

923
00:43:19,440 --> 00:43:22,120
Speaker 1: very kind of like like more prude and yeah on

924
00:43:22,160 --> 00:43:26,799
Speaker 1: the surface, but dude, Germans are filthy, filthy yeah, bro,

925
00:43:27,200 --> 00:43:29,880
Speaker 1: like the German boom boom clubs.

926
00:43:30,160 --> 00:43:35,000
Speaker 5: No, no, no, oh wow, there you go. AnyWho, So

927
00:43:35,400 --> 00:43:38,800
Speaker 5: you know, we we've discovered the op has this undergarment

928
00:43:38,880 --> 00:43:44,040
Speaker 5: sniffing thing going on, and her boyfriend said that he

929
00:43:44,160 --> 00:43:46,560
Speaker 5: saw them and just threw them in his drawer, which

930
00:43:46,600 --> 00:43:48,440
Speaker 5: is why they were right on top and.

931
00:43:48,360 --> 00:43:50,399
Speaker 1: There was no attempt at hiding them. Still a little

932
00:43:50,440 --> 00:43:54,319
Speaker 1: suss to me, But I don't know, like like I

933
00:43:54,320 --> 00:43:57,160
Speaker 1: feel like you should disclose that kind of thing. Yeah. Yeah,

934
00:43:57,239 --> 00:43:59,320
Speaker 1: that's the thing, is like, why has he not mentioned

935
00:43:59,360 --> 00:44:02,920
Speaker 1: this before? Yeah, I mean maybe it's embarrassing. It's that.

936
00:44:03,400 --> 00:44:05,800
Speaker 1: And also I mean I saw I'm not a panty

937
00:44:05,840 --> 00:44:08,600
Speaker 1: sniffer myself, so I can't pretend to be, uh be

938
00:44:08,840 --> 00:44:12,160
Speaker 1: involved in the mind of the panty sniffer. My thought is,

939
00:44:12,160 --> 00:44:13,879
Speaker 1: like you know that experiment where they had a bunch

940
00:44:13,920 --> 00:44:15,880
Speaker 1: of guys work out and they had these like T

941
00:44:16,000 --> 00:44:17,560
Speaker 1: shirts that were full of sweat and they had the

942
00:44:17,600 --> 00:44:19,520
Speaker 1: women smell it. I was like, oh my god, this

943
00:44:19,600 --> 00:44:22,640
Speaker 1: smells so good, like and it's like pheromones and stuff. No,

944
00:44:22,880 --> 00:44:25,640
Speaker 1: I've never heard of that apparently, so this is actually

945
00:44:25,680 --> 00:44:30,000
Speaker 1: really interesting. So they did a study where these guys

946
00:44:30,160 --> 00:44:31,839
Speaker 1: so like worked out in a shirt and put it

947
00:44:31,840 --> 00:44:34,680
Speaker 1: in immediately, like when it was wet and soaking with sweat.

948
00:44:34,719 --> 00:44:36,560
Speaker 1: They put it in a plastic bag and sealed it

949
00:44:36,960 --> 00:44:41,600
Speaker 1: and then without showing who these guys were. They gat

950
00:44:41,719 --> 00:44:44,600
Speaker 1: the like they put the shirts on a table and

951
00:44:44,640 --> 00:44:48,759
Speaker 1: had all these women select witch shirt smelled best to them,

952
00:44:49,280 --> 00:44:52,359
Speaker 1: and then they paired up, Like they paired these people

953
00:44:52,440 --> 00:44:55,640
Speaker 1: up just based on the smell, and there was a

954
00:44:55,719 --> 00:44:59,319
Speaker 1: ton of attraction based only on smell, and like a

955
00:44:59,320 --> 00:45:02,840
Speaker 1: lot of these couple were like, damn looking fresh. And

956
00:45:02,880 --> 00:45:06,319
Speaker 1: so maybe it's the same with the panties. Yeah, I

957
00:45:06,360 --> 00:45:08,359
Speaker 1: think you're right. It's just such a funny where it's

958
00:45:08,360 --> 00:45:11,080
Speaker 1: like so so so they were basically there were some

959
00:45:11,280 --> 00:45:14,960
Speaker 1: women that liked certain shirts of certain guys. So it's like,

960
00:45:15,160 --> 00:45:18,000
Speaker 1: all right, if I if they liked guys sees shirts

961
00:45:18,440 --> 00:45:20,399
Speaker 1: and then they introduced her to guy, see, then they're

962
00:45:20,440 --> 00:45:20,920
Speaker 1: hitting it off.

963
00:45:20,920 --> 00:45:24,200
Speaker 5: That's basically what they're saying. Yeah, yeah, that's interesting. I

964
00:45:24,320 --> 00:45:27,560
Speaker 5: I do have to wonder if like none of them

965
00:45:27,600 --> 00:45:30,000
Speaker 5: were like, ooh, these smell like sweat.

966
00:45:30,239 --> 00:45:32,239
Speaker 1: I didn't know. I mean, like, that's a little weird.

967
00:45:32,320 --> 00:45:37,560
Speaker 1: So so my girlfriend will literally steal my shirts that

968
00:45:37,560 --> 00:45:39,919
Speaker 1: I've been wearing for a little bit and just wear

969
00:45:40,000 --> 00:45:42,359
Speaker 1: them so she has my smell. I don't know, that's

970
00:45:42,400 --> 00:45:44,960
Speaker 1: probably weird, but no, I'll one up you my my

971
00:45:45,000 --> 00:45:47,480
Speaker 1: girlfriend actually does like my bo So now I yeah,

972
00:45:47,600 --> 00:45:50,839
Speaker 1: say it's a thing, like it happens. It happens, it's

973
00:45:50,880 --> 00:45:51,200
Speaker 1: a thing.

974
00:45:51,280 --> 00:45:54,960
Speaker 5: Bro Well, getting getting back to Op's ordeal, it gets

975
00:45:55,000 --> 00:45:57,960
Speaker 5: a little more complicated here. See Ope is willing to

976
00:45:58,040 --> 00:46:00,960
Speaker 5: accept the underwear sniffing and just move. But here's the

977
00:46:01,000 --> 00:46:03,080
Speaker 5: thing that she can't figure out. She doesn't know who's

978
00:46:03,160 --> 00:46:07,000
Speaker 5: underwear it is right like she's still like, it's a mystery.

979
00:46:07,080 --> 00:46:10,000
Speaker 5: It's a mystery. So he contacted her old roommate, twenty

980
00:46:10,000 --> 00:46:13,360
Speaker 5: five female, and she swears that they are not hers

981
00:46:13,440 --> 00:46:16,880
Speaker 5: and she's never seen them. She also contacted her new roommate,

982
00:46:16,920 --> 00:46:19,799
Speaker 5: twenty three male and his girlfriend who comes over occasionally.

983
00:46:20,080 --> 00:46:23,160
Speaker 5: They aren't hers either, And I confirmed with my roommate

984
00:46:23,360 --> 00:46:26,080
Speaker 5: that he has not had other girls in the apartment.

985
00:46:26,160 --> 00:46:27,840
Speaker 1: What if that's what it is. It's just that the

986
00:46:27,920 --> 00:46:33,160
Speaker 1: roommate was sneaking around. Oh the other roommatemate his girlfriend.

987
00:46:33,200 --> 00:46:36,439
Speaker 1: That would be a plot test. Oh, Now the unit

988
00:46:36,520 --> 00:46:38,800
Speaker 1: is pretty new, so I don't know if it's possible

989
00:46:38,880 --> 00:46:40,960
Speaker 1: that they are from the old tenant. We've lived here

990
00:46:41,000 --> 00:46:45,360
Speaker 1: for three years. Three year old underwear. I don't I

991
00:46:45,360 --> 00:46:48,040
Speaker 1: don't think so. Maybe maybe he saw it and kept

992
00:46:48,080 --> 00:46:50,359
Speaker 1: it around for a long time, because you know, like

993
00:46:50,440 --> 00:46:51,960
Speaker 1: Panny's age, like fine wine.

994
00:46:51,960 --> 00:46:54,799
Speaker 5: They say, well, he's well, he said that he like

995
00:46:55,120 --> 00:46:57,200
Speaker 5: literally like I think he said he recently found him

996
00:46:57,200 --> 00:47:00,560
Speaker 5: and threw them right on top existing and just so

997
00:47:00,600 --> 00:47:03,160
Speaker 5: it seemed to be like a recent event. Now I've

998
00:47:03,160 --> 00:47:06,640
Speaker 5: only told a few people because it really is just

999
00:47:06,960 --> 00:47:11,319
Speaker 5: underwear sniffing, Like it's not that intense in op's perspective,

1000
00:47:11,960 --> 00:47:12,560
Speaker 5: and I.

1001
00:47:12,480 --> 00:47:14,120
Speaker 1: Don't want to humiliate my boyfriend.

1002
00:47:14,360 --> 00:47:16,759
Speaker 5: I truly love him and I see myself spending my

1003
00:47:16,880 --> 00:47:20,160
Speaker 5: life with him. My therapist thinks he wouldn't cheat on

1004
00:47:20,239 --> 00:47:22,640
Speaker 5: me and that it's not plausible and I should let

1005
00:47:22,719 --> 00:47:25,719
Speaker 5: it go. Now I disagree with the therapists here. I'm like,

1006
00:47:26,440 --> 00:47:29,400
Speaker 5: I think it's still plausible that he could be cheating.

1007
00:47:29,480 --> 00:47:32,320
Speaker 1: But I think it's still plausible. But I'm just thinking,

1008
00:47:32,360 --> 00:47:35,880
Speaker 1: like sometimes I do laundry at my parents' house, and

1009
00:47:35,960 --> 00:47:38,480
Speaker 1: there have been times where I come back with my

1010
00:47:38,600 --> 00:47:42,759
Speaker 1: laundry and there is underwear that that is either my

1011
00:47:42,840 --> 00:47:46,400
Speaker 1: sisters or my mom's. I don't want that underwear, but

1012
00:47:46,800 --> 00:47:49,360
Speaker 1: I forget to bring it back, and so I probably

1013
00:47:49,440 --> 00:47:53,399
Speaker 1: have some my parents or sisters underwear. This is so good.

1014
00:47:53,560 --> 00:47:58,399
Speaker 5: That is a theory that have the parents visited, has

1015
00:47:57,480 --> 00:48:01,720
Speaker 5: a sister in law visited. That's actually a decent theory.

1016
00:48:01,920 --> 00:48:03,879
Speaker 1: I think there's a lot. There's a lot that could

1017
00:48:03,880 --> 00:48:06,080
Speaker 1: be going on there. I wouldn't say he's cheating. I

1018
00:48:06,080 --> 00:48:06,960
Speaker 1: I don't believe it.

1019
00:48:07,080 --> 00:48:10,320
Speaker 5: Well, I guess against that. A couple of my friends disagree.

1020
00:48:10,400 --> 00:48:13,160
Speaker 5: They do think that he could be going out cheating.

1021
00:48:13,920 --> 00:48:16,360
Speaker 5: I want so badly to just let it go, but

1022
00:48:16,480 --> 00:48:19,400
Speaker 5: I don't know who's underwear it is, and they didn't

1023
00:48:19,440 --> 00:48:20,720
Speaker 5: just appear out of nowhere.

1024
00:48:21,280 --> 00:48:23,600
Speaker 1: I honestly don't even know what to think. I just

1025
00:48:23,640 --> 00:48:26,239
Speaker 1: came here to write it out. Yeah, I don't. I

1026
00:48:26,239 --> 00:48:27,160
Speaker 1: don't think it's a big deal.

1027
00:48:27,200 --> 00:48:30,040
Speaker 5: It's tricky because if it really is the underwear sniffing thing,

1028
00:48:30,040 --> 00:48:32,120
Speaker 5: then absolutely I agree with you. I don't think it's

1029
00:48:32,120 --> 00:48:34,360
Speaker 5: a big deal, But I am I am still suss

1030
00:48:34,400 --> 00:48:37,480
Speaker 5: about Op's boyfriend because I don't know, like.

1031
00:48:37,520 --> 00:48:41,280
Speaker 1: How how how would they get there? I like your theory.

1032
00:48:41,280 --> 00:48:43,960
Speaker 1: If he's just ordering it from the internet, that is

1033
00:48:44,000 --> 00:48:46,399
Speaker 1: also possible, But then why did why didn't he say that?

1034
00:48:46,440 --> 00:48:49,960
Speaker 1: You know what I mean? Because that embarrassed about the

1035
00:48:50,760 --> 00:48:51,560
Speaker 1: about the situation.

1036
00:48:51,640 --> 00:48:54,080
Speaker 5: It's possible, but he admitted to it, you know.

1037
00:48:54,239 --> 00:48:57,439
Speaker 1: So yeah, I don't know. There is some plot holes, yeah,

1038
00:48:57,440 --> 00:49:00,560
Speaker 1: definitely that are concerning. But if it true, is just

1039
00:49:00,600 --> 00:49:03,560
Speaker 1: an underwear sniffing, that's not a big deal. Yeah, sniff

1040
00:49:03,680 --> 00:49:06,160
Speaker 1: some underwear. I have a few laughs, it's fine.

1041
00:49:06,360 --> 00:49:09,920
Speaker 5: You know what viewers could do other than sniffing underwear?

1042
00:49:10,600 --> 00:49:16,360
Speaker 5: Subscrib Guys, hit that subscribe button and we will you

1043
00:49:16,360 --> 00:49:16,919
Speaker 5: next time.

1044
00:49:17,040 --> 00:49:17,839
Speaker 1: See you next time.