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Speaker 1: Hey, Hey, Hey, I tried to do a little cabaret.

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Speaker 1: You know, I don't know. Hey, it's tippity.

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Speaker 2: Hello, guys, did you miss us? We were only gone

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Speaker 2: for one week, I.

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Speaker 1: Know, but honestly someone wrote something about they missed me singing.

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Speaker 1: I don't know. I was like, oh, you're probably the

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Speaker 1: only one, but don't be hater se hat im singing.

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Speaker 1: Me and Manny were starting to try to start the show.

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Speaker 1: For like thirty minutes, we were like lamenting over men

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Speaker 1: and food and how they want you to make every

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Speaker 1: sandwich because you have a special sandwich hand apparently.

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Speaker 2: I mean, it's kind of the tactic that I used

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Speaker 2: so that my husband does the dishes. He'll like unload

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Speaker 2: and load the dishwasher because he thinks I'm really bad

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Speaker 2: at it, and I just you know, let him I purpose.

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Speaker 2: I might do a bad job on purpose, just so

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Speaker 2: he gets outraged enough to do it himself. No, but

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Speaker 2: this whole thing where like I cook really good food.

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Speaker 2: I mean I like to think so, but I like

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Speaker 2: to cook meals like you know, meatballs or spaghetti, or

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Speaker 2: make chicken and vegetables and have it for the week.

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Speaker 2: But he's just not from that leftover life, Like I

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Speaker 2: am raised by a single mom with four kids, Like

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Speaker 2: we would my mom would make one thing and we

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Speaker 2: would just eat it until we were until we were

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Speaker 2: just so sick of it and it was all gone.

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Speaker 2: But you know, he's from a different household. He had,

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Speaker 2: you know, a mom and an abuela making fresh meals

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Speaker 2: for him every day. Doesn't really go for leftovers anyway. Like,

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Speaker 2: so I decided to forget, I'm not going to cook

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Speaker 2: these big meals because I just end up eating them

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Speaker 2: myself for weeks at a time. And so I brought

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Speaker 2: home some like bread ham and some damn cheese, and

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Speaker 2: I put together a sandwich for him, and it was

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Speaker 2: like I was just God's gift. I was just like

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Speaker 2: this got and I'm like this this is all atkes, Yes,

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Speaker 2: why have I tried so hard? And then also if

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Speaker 2: this is all it takes, why don't you make a

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Speaker 2: damn ham sandwich exactly? So you have.

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Speaker 1: A special hand, I'm telling you, like Supeman does not

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Speaker 1: not that he doesn't cook, but he cooks like that

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Speaker 1: man stuff like he calls it. He has this thing

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Speaker 1: called turkey Ronnie, don't I mean? And I was like,

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Speaker 1: what it's literally like it's pasta, so it's almost like

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Speaker 1: spaghetti but ground turkey. And then yeah, and then like

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Speaker 1: I guess sometimes some veggies in it. I don't know

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Speaker 1: he's coming, but the the it's like elbow macaroni. I

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Speaker 1: don't know. It's so it's a hot mess.

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Speaker 2: And so he hab.

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Speaker 1: Yeah to that extent, but like I guess he put

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Speaker 1: it together himself, and you can't tell him. When I

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Speaker 1: first met him, he would make a vat of turkey

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Speaker 1: Ronnie and I'm like, what so much so that the

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Speaker 1: neighborhood kids knew mister John made turkey brownie and kids,

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Speaker 1: it's such like a like a kid meal. And I'm like,

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Speaker 1: I mean it's it doesn't taste bad, but it's not

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Speaker 1: the kind of.

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Speaker 2: Thing like you want to eat every day.

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Speaker 1: But yeah, No, I felt really good because I was like,

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Speaker 1: I've made dinner tonight. I've not made dinner, and honestly

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Speaker 1: probably two and a half weeks, we like not that

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Speaker 1: we haven't eating dinner, I just have that made dinner.

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Speaker 1: So he was happy that. I was like, He's like, oh,

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Speaker 1: you are on your dean today. I'm like, meanwhile, you

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Speaker 1: didn't even hear about my day and all the things

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Speaker 1: that I did for business. But because I've got baked

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Speaker 1: chicken in the oven and some yellow rice from a

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Speaker 1: box on the on the stove, I'm on my dean.

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Speaker 2: So whatever does he usually do the cooking or what's

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Speaker 2: y'all's what's y'all dynamic? Because we cook, we eat separate

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Speaker 2: meals most of the time because I will make a

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Speaker 2: nice meal for myself. I'm trying to create a human

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Speaker 2: person who's got brain cells. So I'm trying to eat

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Speaker 2: all my veggies, and he's like having corn dog street

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Speaker 2: nights in a row.

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Speaker 1: No we don't, so he's not. I mean he'll cook sometimes,

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Speaker 1: but honestly we will like eat out or order a lot,

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Speaker 1: which I never was that person, but because I just

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Speaker 1: sometimes some days, I just have so much to do

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Speaker 1: and I'm like.

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Speaker 2: Of course, who has time to cook all day.

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Speaker 1: Exactly, So I'm trying to get better because it's not

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Speaker 1: obviously that's not ideal. So but like sometimes I'll start,

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Speaker 1: he'll finish, so like he's like I, even though I'm

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Speaker 1: not like the greatest cook, I do season really well.

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Speaker 1: So sometimes I'll season whatever thing we're having, and then

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Speaker 1: when he comes home he'll put it in the oven

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Speaker 1: or whatever. So yeah, I'm trying to get better, but

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Speaker 1: I'm also somebody who hates food chopping, so I'm always scrounging, like,

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Speaker 1: m what does it make?

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Speaker 2: I get a little salty about this whole thing because

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Speaker 2: we've been arguing more about this whole You know, there's

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Speaker 2: days when I get home super late, and I come

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Speaker 2: home and there's been no thought about what I'm going

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Speaker 2: to have for dinner. I'm literally like creating your future child,

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Speaker 2: and you don't care what I have for dinner. Oh babe,

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Speaker 2: I just had some warmed up pizza or I stopped

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Speaker 2: at you know, Chipotle on the way home. I'm like,

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Speaker 2: so what about me? Yes, drive it? And I'm like,

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Speaker 2: for me, I care about what he eats. Like I'm

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Speaker 2: kind of turning into my dad where my dad always

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Speaker 2: asks what you what'd you eat good today? And we'll

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Speaker 2: tell him we have some differ lun and I always

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Speaker 2: I always check in on Enrique. I'm like, what'd you

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Speaker 2: have for lunch? Okay, well what do you want for

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Speaker 2: you know? I care about what he eats, and I

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Speaker 2: feel like I'm turning kind of into like a naggy mom.

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Speaker 2: Because I'm like, where do you do you eat a

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Speaker 2: vegetable in your day to day? Like I never see

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Speaker 2: you eat fruit? Do you like apples? I don't think

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Speaker 2: I've seen you eat an apple in seven or eight years.

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Speaker 2: But it doesn't He's not doing that for me, And

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Speaker 2: I'm like, I want someone to care about me, you

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Speaker 2: know what I eat. But then I talked to my

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Speaker 2: therapist about it and she was all, well, you knew

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Speaker 2: who he was when you married him. And she's like, well,

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Speaker 2: if the best you can do is go to the

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Speaker 2: because he will go to the store. He will, you know,

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Speaker 2: if I badger him enough. But he'll bring back like

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Speaker 2: frozen things. He doesn't really know how to put a

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Speaker 2: meal together, you know, and it'll be a lot of

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Speaker 2: frozen pizzas and oh my god, he discovered many corn

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Speaker 2: dogs and it's been many corn dogs for a while,

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Speaker 2: or like whatever egg rolls. But he'll bring stuff back.

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Speaker 2: And she was like, if that's all he does when

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Speaker 2: you have the baby, Hebrew goes to the store and

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Speaker 2: brings home frozen meals that you guys can heat up.

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Speaker 2: You have to give him credit. And I'm like, mm hmm,

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Speaker 2: that sounds very fair, but also not there. Why doesn't

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Speaker 2: he need to learn how to cook? I don't know.

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Speaker 2: I'm struggling with it. I feel like maybe our listeners

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Speaker 2: will have similar experiences, because it just feels like this

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Speaker 2: old school gender dynamic that it's driving me a little crazy.

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Speaker 1: Yes, and so I will say, Supermann. It is pretty

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Speaker 1: good at not holding me to that to except for

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Speaker 1: when I guess it's gotten to the extreme where he's like, like,

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Speaker 1: we have not had a meal in three weeks, and

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Speaker 1: I'm like, well, Brah, before I got here, who's making food? Oh?

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Speaker 2: You were.

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Speaker 1: Let's see how we could go back to that. Although

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Speaker 1: his food, like I said, is so bachelor that I'm like,

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Speaker 1: I don't want it.

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Speaker 2: That's the way. If I let him cook, it's going

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Speaker 2: to be frozen corn dogs. It has been. I can't

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Speaker 2: be eating that way. Like, you know, he's not going

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Speaker 2: to make me a kale salad or butternut squash soup.

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Speaker 2: That's what I like to eat.

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Speaker 1: Oh yeah, that's what happened. Girl. You gotta let that go,

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Speaker 1: that problem. Oh no, I don't want to.

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Speaker 2: Let it go. I want it. I want it.

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Speaker 1: Speaking of which, how was that baby shower? It looks amazing.

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Speaker 2: Baby shower was epic. It was ridiculous. Baby shower was ridiculous.

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Speaker 2: So if anyone who's listening from the front who has

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Speaker 2: a background, I don't know if it's like a it's

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Speaker 2: particularly Dominican thing, but the baby showers I've been to

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Speaker 2: from Marique side the family are always like at night,

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Speaker 2: it's a big party. It's like basically kind of a

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Speaker 2: wedding reception vibe. There's dancing, there's open Barther's food. And

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Speaker 2: so when I was sitting down to plant, not when

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Speaker 2: I was sitting down to plant, but when my mom

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Speaker 2: started asking about the baby shower, I immediately knew what

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Speaker 2: I didn't want, which is like a really boring I've

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Speaker 2: been to way too many boring baby showers that are

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Speaker 2: like on a Sunday afternoon from one to four and

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Speaker 2: you have to sit there and watch, you know, watch

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Speaker 2: someone open onesie after onesie after onesie for two hours straight.

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Speaker 2: Maybe you play a game, like maybe you have mimosas,

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Speaker 2: and it's just not that entertaining, and I just I

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Speaker 2: didn't want to spend money on that kind of experience

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Speaker 2: for my friends. And so I was like, let me

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Speaker 2: take like, let me really embrace the Dominican side of

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Speaker 2: my family, and so I had my my mom and

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Speaker 2: my sister, who were like two Midwestern white ladies at

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Speaker 2: this point, like they really spearheaded it. But our Dominican

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Speaker 2: my my husband's brother's fiance, Jamilla, who's this angel from heaven.

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Speaker 2: She's so helpful and so nice, and I was like,

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Speaker 2: you need to be our Dominican ambassador and be sure

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Speaker 2: that they shepherd them through as they planned this shower,

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Speaker 2: and they did such an amazing job. It was in

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Speaker 2: my husband's neighborhood, like blocks from his where his family

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Speaker 2: all lives on Dykeman in Inwood, and this nice restaurant

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Speaker 2: and they had his brother got us a DJ. There

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Speaker 2: was amazing music. The food was like all this Dominican food.

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Speaker 2: There's open bar. I didn't open a single present. The

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Speaker 2: aunties didn't like that part, but I didn't open a

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Speaker 2: single present. It was beautiful and the best part was

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Speaker 2: at the end. So I haven't told you guys, but

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Speaker 2: like a or two ago, I was at my doctor

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Speaker 2: and we didn't want to know the gender, Like I

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Speaker 2: really didn't care boy or girl, and I really loved

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Speaker 2: the idea of being surprised, you know, at the birth,

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Speaker 2: like having Enrique, you know, run out to the waiting

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Speaker 2: room and be like it's a you know, boy or

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Speaker 2: girl or whatever. But then my doctor blew it the

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Speaker 2: other day, like about a month ago, just zoomed right

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Speaker 2: in on the ultrasound. I don't have no idea why.

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Speaker 2: I don't know how she forgot. I've been seeing her

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Speaker 2: for nearly a year, and she was like, there's his

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Speaker 2: little manhood. And I was like looking at my son's

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Speaker 2: penis right there on the screen.

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Speaker 1: So like what I did?

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Speaker 2: You were like, wait what? It was so many emotions.

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Speaker 2: I was like, I was honestly, honestly devastated. It was

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Speaker 2: the hormones, but I was so sad. But anyway, the

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Speaker 2: bright side was that we decided we were going to

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Speaker 2: do a gender reveal for our moms at the end

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Speaker 2: of the shower. So at the end of the shower,

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Speaker 2: everyone had a great time when we brought out these

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Speaker 2: confetti poppers and we announced I told the story, and

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Speaker 2: then we asked our the two moms, our moms to

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Speaker 2: come over, and they were just like shake. They were

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Speaker 2: like crying already, and these and these are two women

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Speaker 2: who have been telling me it's a girl. For months,

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Speaker 2: like each of them has their own superstitions, and like

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Speaker 2: they were convinced it was a girl. So I knew

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Speaker 2: it was going to be good. And we got this.

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Speaker 2: We had this really special moment where we do the

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Speaker 2: the gender reveal and it was it was just perfect, perfect, perfect,

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Speaker 2: And were.

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Speaker 1: They excited when they found it was a boy?

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Speaker 2: Well, his mom came up. Enrique's mom came over and

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Speaker 2: was like, it's okay, it's a boy, Like she was

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Speaker 2: almost and I think she really wanted a girl. All yeah, honestly,

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Speaker 2: everyone was. I didn't expect the entire party. They just

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Speaker 2: like everyone came in. It was like one massive group

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Speaker 2: hug and it was you know, if I'm going to

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Speaker 2: do it, Honestly, if I was going to do a

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Speaker 2: baby shower, this is exactly the way, like over the top, ridiculous,

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Speaker 2: and I loved it. It was beautiful. And while I

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Speaker 2: was having that epic moment, you miss queen, were just

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Speaker 2: hosted the party of your life.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it was so awesome. Yes, at at the at

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Speaker 1: the Smith Mansion. No it's not a mansion, but my yeah,

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Speaker 1: I had my fortieth. Honestly, it's exactly what I wanted.

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Speaker 1: I wanted the people that I loved and cared about there.

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Speaker 1: If you know me, I'm not really one for the fuss.

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Speaker 1: And but it was nice because Bonda, who did our

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Speaker 1: reception where we had at her restaurant, she's a friend

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Speaker 1: of mine who shut down her restaurant for our reception.

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Speaker 1: She she catered and when I tell you the food

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Speaker 1: was she put, I mean she outdid herself. The lobster

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Speaker 1: macaroni and cheese was out of this world and it

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Speaker 1: happened to be perfect weather. So she ordered because Vonda

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Speaker 1: doesn't just like cook food when she caters, she does

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Speaker 1: like the whole thing, presentation, decorations, all that kind of stuff.

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Speaker 1: So she ordered what they call hot high hats or

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Speaker 1: high table something like that where it's like the tall

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Speaker 1: kind of like tables with like seats around it. So

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Speaker 1: I was like, are we gonna need it? You know,

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Speaker 1: because our backyard is fully paid, like whoever lived there

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Speaker 1: before put full papers back there, and so we had

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Speaker 1: four of them. And then Superman's sister like gave us

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Speaker 1: like this, like it's not a money pit. It's almost

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Speaker 1: like a fire. It's not a pit because it's not low,

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Speaker 1: but it's like not a money pit. I'm not to

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Speaker 1: say a fire pit. He gave us like this fire

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Speaker 1: pit thing, so what but it was like so it

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Speaker 1: was just so the weather was perfect outside, she had

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Speaker 1: food outside. We had a DJ in the basement so

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Speaker 1: you could hear the music upstairs. Like everyone was there,

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Speaker 1: my aunt's, my uncle's Jorelle side of the family. Like

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Speaker 1: some Unicorn Squad members team members came. It just was

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Speaker 1: really really it was like, Tiffany, it's your life, like

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Speaker 1: you know, people from when I was like from high

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Speaker 1: school came, folks from college. So it just was a

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Speaker 1: really good time and I had a really good time.

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Speaker 1: And honestly, I spent like the whole time giving tours

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Speaker 1: of the house that everyone wanted. It was like a

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Speaker 1: housewarming slash fortieth birthday party. And yeah, it was an

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Speaker 1: awesome time. And I just have to say, honestly, Jermaine

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Speaker 1: and Rihanna Lewis from Remain Home. Their instagram is r

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Speaker 1: E h m A I N Home Remain Home. They

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Speaker 1: are absolutely amazing. They but what look So Jermaine is

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Speaker 1: a is a project manager, and so my contractor was okay,

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Speaker 1: and but Jermaine really made sure he kept on track

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Speaker 1: because I mean it's like a fellow. We built the

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Speaker 1: house from the ground up, darn near and then Rihanna

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Speaker 1: with the design, she went to direct so she's got

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Speaker 1: her master's in design, and she didn't just help design

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Speaker 1: like rooms or where things should be, but she went

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Speaker 1: as far like planters and this is a really nice

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Speaker 1: like bookshelf that should be here. And then because they

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Speaker 1: live around the corner from us, came and like hung

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Speaker 1: things up the night before we transformed like the whole

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Speaker 1: house with hanging up anything that was left over. We

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Speaker 1: stayed up till two or three o'clock in the morning

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Speaker 1: the night before getting the house ready for the party,

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Speaker 1: and so did they, and they came over the next

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Speaker 1: morning the morning of the party to help. Again, they

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Speaker 1: are above and beyonders. They have become such great friends

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Speaker 1: of ours. Yeah, they are amazing. I always tell people

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Speaker 1: and they're like, would you hire your contractor Again, I'm like, maybe,

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Speaker 1: but not with our remain home. So yeah, they're they

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Speaker 1: are absolutely amazing for like a design.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it just got to use like a lot of

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Speaker 2: it for the party too, which was you know. I

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Speaker 2: mean that's the reason you buy a house, right is

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Speaker 2: too interest in it so.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and I wanted, like, you know, I missed it

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Speaker 1: because when I was in my when I lived in

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Speaker 1: my condo, my kinda was like a gathering spot for

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Speaker 1: when I was single, me and my girlfriends, we'd have

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Speaker 1: girls night in and and my sisters would come over

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Speaker 1: all the time. So I missed Our apartment was so

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Speaker 1: small before where we were living in the Halfway Hood.

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Speaker 1: And so now we've got this beautiful house where I

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Speaker 1: just want people to come over, like Superman's siblings come over,

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Speaker 1: My siblings come over, my niece and my nephew come

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Speaker 1: over all the time. And I love it that we

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Speaker 1: can have a house full of like family, friends and love.

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Speaker 1: And so yeah, it was awesome. And I forgot to

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Speaker 1: tell you, but you know, I want to go see

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Speaker 1: the Harriet movie. So my friend Cynthia Rivo is in it.

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Speaker 1: She is Harriet, and I'm not gonna I was nervous

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Speaker 1: because I was like, either way, i'm gonna be like

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Speaker 1: it was great. So I was practicing my it was

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Speaker 1: great face, you know, Yeah, but honestly it was great.

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Speaker 1: It was really good.

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Speaker 2: Yes, we didn't we didn't get her the twenty dollars bill.

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Speaker 2: Con you please not mess up her movie.

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Speaker 1: I know, but we know what I It was really good.

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Speaker 1: It was touching, It was sad, but bigger than everything else.

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Speaker 1: It was so inspiring and inspirational. I didn't leave feeling

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Speaker 1: like like twelve Years of Slave was amazing, but it

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Speaker 1: also was devastating.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god, I left the week to.

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Speaker 1: Recover what like, I'm still not recovering.

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Speaker 2: I ruined. It ruined movies for a lot of people,

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Speaker 2: like movies about slavery. Like people were like, that's the

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Speaker 2: last one I'm never gonna see.

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Speaker 1: I was broken, like bro I was hysterical in the

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Speaker 1: movie theater, but this I did not lead that way.

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Speaker 1: I left feeling like I left the Beyoncee concert. I

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Speaker 1: was like, who won the world?

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Speaker 2: Girls?

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Speaker 1: Like? I felt so empowered? Honestly, Mandy, I was like,

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Speaker 1: what else can I do for my people? What can

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Speaker 1: I do for women? How can I be better?

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Speaker 2: Like it was?

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Speaker 1: And I love that feeling because it didn't sugarcoat slavery

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Speaker 1: and all the horrific things that happened. But what it

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Speaker 1: did was through Harriet and her story. What made you

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Speaker 1: realize is that despite that, there is courage, there is strength,

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Speaker 1: there is grace, There is it just she's Harry, I'm

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Speaker 1: truly a superhero. Yeah. I mean, you know, I can't

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Speaker 1: speak for everybody else, but I really enjoyed it. And

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Speaker 1: from the vibe that I felt when the lights came on,

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Speaker 1: everyone really enjoyed it. It didn't leave you feeling sad

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Speaker 1: and left you feeling like what can I do?

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Speaker 2: So yeah, all I wanted to hear because I was

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Speaker 2: trying to convince two of my friends who listen to

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Speaker 2: the show actually to go, and they're both just like,

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Speaker 2: now we're not what we're done with slave movies. And

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Speaker 2: I could tell from the previous it's much more than

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Speaker 2: a slave movie. Like, first of all, in slave movies,

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Speaker 2: typically they tend to run an African American character. Yes,

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Speaker 2: Lupita was was one of the central figures in Twelve

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Speaker 2: Years of Slave, but it really was about Chiwadell Edgiafor's character, right,

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Speaker 2: and and it just feels like and often you see

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Speaker 2: I don't know it just it's you don't see. And

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Speaker 2: even Black Panther again, so many fabulous women, strong characters,

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Speaker 2: but that was like a nice surprise the real character

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Speaker 2: was Black Panther. Uh. Anyway, So to have a movie

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Speaker 2: focus on the female like a female slave who came

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Speaker 2: out of that situation and went back, like to the

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Speaker 2: courage to go back and bring people with you. I

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Speaker 2: keep thinking about she posted the Cynthia posted on Instagram

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Speaker 2: that song that she wrote. Does she co write over

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Speaker 2: or something?

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Speaker 1: Yes, and tell you at the end it's still I

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Speaker 1: was like, this is my song, I said, I told myself.

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Speaker 1: I'm like, oh my god, it made I remember I

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Speaker 1: used to like kind of like finally say like whatever

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Speaker 1: I used to do, like an online ask that like

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Speaker 1: the reason why I teach so much is when it

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Speaker 1: comes to financial education, and the reason why I do

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Speaker 1: so much for free is that I remember distinctly like

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Speaker 1: praying quite honestly that God, if you'll teach me, I

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Speaker 1: promise I'll help others. And like I used to say,

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Speaker 1: like I want to be the Harriet Tubman of a

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Speaker 1: financial education. But I mean, I say a tongue in cheek,

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Speaker 1: but honestly, no, I do that. I feel like that

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Speaker 1: as I get free, I can't be free if I'm

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Speaker 1: not if I'm not going back for other people. And

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Speaker 1: so that's how the Budgetista was built from that sentiment

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Speaker 1: of going back and helping others. Someone helped me and honestly, yeah,

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Speaker 1: go see Harry. Honestly, I'm so inspired. I'm actually trying

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Speaker 1: to figure out what the city I want to I

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Speaker 1: want the budgetista to to buy out a theater. It's

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Speaker 1: like maybe like fifteen hundred dollars ish, So I want

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Speaker 1: to buy out a theater to maybe have like high

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Speaker 1: school seniors or I'm trying to figure out what group

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Speaker 1: should should because Newark has like a theater that Shock owns,

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Speaker 1: so I'm trying to think like what group to invite

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Speaker 1: to see how tickets it includes, because I know there's

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Speaker 1: about eight hundred high school seniors in the city of Newark,

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Speaker 1: so I don't know how big the theater, but that's

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Speaker 1: what I want to do. I want to buy out

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Speaker 1: a theater and then and then buye, like you know,

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Speaker 1: a specific group of probably students to go watch the

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Speaker 1: Harriet movie. Yeah, that's how inspired I was. I was like, no,

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Speaker 1: it needs to be seen that you are capable of

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Speaker 1: so much more than you even you know, you even know,

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00:19:27,400 --> 00:19:30,520
Speaker 1: and that that if you're waiting to not be afraid

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Speaker 1: to make a move, like you're gonna have to move fearful, fearfully, like,

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Speaker 1: that's what you really learned that like those people who

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Speaker 1: make history happen, it's not because they were fearless. It's

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Speaker 1: because they move despite the fear. And so yeah, go

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Speaker 1: see that movie Shackle.

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Speaker 2: November first, right, yep, that Friday. Okay, done, Dragon Husbey, Dragonhusbe. Oh,

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Speaker 2: that's great. Congrats to Cynthia. Love her. She crushed me

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Speaker 2: in color purple.

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Speaker 1: Okay, and she sings in a movie too, so her voice,

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Speaker 1: of course is like an angel.

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Speaker 2: She does. She's so annoying and good. I'm really sorry

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Speaker 2: for you being her friend least from I could be

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Speaker 2: a fan. I don't have to, like, you know whatever,

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Speaker 2: I know.

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Speaker 1: Right, I'm like just anywhere perfect India. Of course, she's

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Speaker 1: like a perfect shape.

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Speaker 2: And she's like she has a beautiful accent. Shall we

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Speaker 2: get to some questions? Yeah, okay, awesome questions today again.

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Speaker 2: You guys can hit us up on the gram. We're

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00:21:06,280 --> 00:21:09,040
Speaker 2: at Brandabission Podcast on Instagram, or you can send us

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Speaker 2: an email directly brand Ambition Podcast at gmail dot com.

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00:21:13,600 --> 00:21:15,320
Speaker 2: Our website is also out there. You can go to

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Speaker 2: brandimission podcast dot com and click ask us anything to

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00:21:18,080 --> 00:21:22,919
Speaker 2: shoot us your questions. Let's take you guys with your

429
00:21:22,920 --> 00:21:25,199
Speaker 2: car problems. We have to take this question because I

430
00:21:25,200 --> 00:21:27,480
Speaker 2: feel like we get a lot of questions from people

431
00:21:27,480 --> 00:21:30,080
Speaker 2: who are in car debt autodet, and we all know

432
00:21:30,080 --> 00:21:34,480
Speaker 2: how I feel about it. I just think Autodet's crushing people.

433
00:21:35,800 --> 00:21:37,960
Speaker 2: But we're not here to judge. We are here to help.

434
00:21:38,080 --> 00:21:42,159
Speaker 2: So let's take a question from Instagram user. We'll call

435
00:21:42,240 --> 00:21:45,879
Speaker 2: her Portia. All right, she says, Hey, ladies, I've gotten

436
00:21:45,880 --> 00:21:48,199
Speaker 2: myself into a pickle. I have a new car that

437
00:21:48,240 --> 00:21:50,359
Speaker 2: I knew when I bought it that I didn't really

438
00:21:50,400 --> 00:21:53,400
Speaker 2: want to take on this financial burden. I did it anyway.

439
00:21:54,160 --> 00:21:56,120
Speaker 2: I was so scared of getting a used Lemon car

440
00:21:56,200 --> 00:21:59,320
Speaker 2: that I went ahead and got a more expensive used one.

441
00:21:59,600 --> 00:22:02,879
Speaker 2: Come to December. This December, my credit will be one

442
00:22:02,960 --> 00:22:05,399
Speaker 2: hundred points higher than when I bought the car, so

443
00:22:05,680 --> 00:22:08,479
Speaker 2: I plan to refinance it. But that's if I decided

444
00:22:08,520 --> 00:22:12,520
Speaker 2: to keep it. I've been contemplating lately doing a voluntary repossession.

445
00:22:12,920 --> 00:22:15,919
Speaker 2: I remember Tiffany said that Superman did a voluntary repo.

446
00:22:16,119 --> 00:22:19,840
Speaker 2: So I want to know does voluntary repot negatively infact

447
00:22:19,960 --> 00:22:25,120
Speaker 2: impact your credit, and if so, for how long. So

448
00:22:25,160 --> 00:22:27,840
Speaker 2: she's got this car that she can't afford. She could

449
00:22:27,840 --> 00:22:31,000
Speaker 2: potentially refinance her auto loan because her credit has improved

450
00:22:31,040 --> 00:22:34,520
Speaker 2: since she got it, but she's like, the car payments

451
00:22:34,520 --> 00:22:37,280
Speaker 2: are so high that she's considering just giving it up altogether. Tiff.

452
00:22:37,400 --> 00:22:45,399
Speaker 1: So, yeah, so I will say that. I mean, well,

453
00:22:45,400 --> 00:22:47,840
Speaker 1: here's one thing for sure, when you your credit score

454
00:22:47,840 --> 00:22:51,960
Speaker 1: will likely take a hit if you do a voluntary repossession.

455
00:22:52,400 --> 00:22:55,439
Speaker 1: But bigger than that, if you're doing a voluntary repossession,

456
00:22:56,080 --> 00:22:59,199
Speaker 1: you you're going like you're still going to owe. So that

457
00:22:59,280 --> 00:23:01,520
Speaker 1: was a hard part for man is that he had

458
00:23:01,560 --> 00:23:04,560
Speaker 1: to give the car back but there was still a balance.

459
00:23:04,560 --> 00:23:07,080
Speaker 1: So you're paying this balance, but you have no car,

460
00:23:08,880 --> 00:23:12,359
Speaker 1: So you have to kind of mentally prepare for that fact.

461
00:23:12,400 --> 00:23:15,440
Speaker 1: Because so he let's just say the car was fifty

462
00:23:15,480 --> 00:23:20,639
Speaker 1: thousand dollars and he he, you know, sent it back

463
00:23:20,760 --> 00:23:24,040
Speaker 1: and they were like, we're gonna give you. He ended

464
00:23:24,119 --> 00:23:26,320
Speaker 1: up having a five thousand dollars ballance forty five thousand

465
00:23:26,359 --> 00:23:29,240
Speaker 1: dollars for it. There was that five thousand dollars balance

466
00:23:29,280 --> 00:23:31,640
Speaker 1: that he had to pay because so what he ended

467
00:23:31,680 --> 00:23:33,480
Speaker 1: up doing was he took a loan from his credit

468
00:23:33,520 --> 00:23:37,040
Speaker 1: union so that way he wouldn't owe he wouldn't like

469
00:23:37,119 --> 00:23:38,920
Speaker 1: the interest rate on what he owed wouldn't be as high,

470
00:23:38,960 --> 00:23:41,200
Speaker 1: so he took a loan from his credit union. They

471
00:23:41,320 --> 00:23:45,080
Speaker 1: paid you know, the car dealership. That's what he sent

472
00:23:45,119 --> 00:23:47,800
Speaker 1: it back to. But he's still owed. Like like I

473
00:23:47,840 --> 00:23:51,560
Speaker 1: said that that five thousand dollars balance that he had

474
00:23:51,560 --> 00:23:53,640
Speaker 1: to just pay until he paid it off. He's glad

475
00:23:53,640 --> 00:23:54,680
Speaker 1: he did it. I mean, he was bitter in the

476
00:23:54,720 --> 00:23:59,200
Speaker 1: beginning because you know whatever, but you know, I told him,

477
00:23:59,240 --> 00:24:01,800
Speaker 1: I'm like, you know, it's either I don't know if

478
00:24:01,840 --> 00:24:06,239
Speaker 1: you guys remember, but his his car note was like

479
00:24:06,400 --> 00:24:10,320
Speaker 1: nine hundred dollars a month, a full mortgage that did

480
00:24:10,359 --> 00:24:13,560
Speaker 1: not include insurance, and then his insurance was like you know,

481
00:24:13,600 --> 00:24:16,399
Speaker 1: another I don't even know. But he was paid like

482
00:24:16,760 --> 00:24:19,240
Speaker 1: literally a mortgage a month. He had one of those

483
00:24:20,480 --> 00:24:23,640
Speaker 1: Yukon's analogy, you know, like those big cars. You know, yeah,

484
00:24:24,880 --> 00:24:25,439
Speaker 1: yeah so.

485
00:24:25,720 --> 00:24:28,040
Speaker 2: But but it's also the reason he ended up owing

486
00:24:28,160 --> 00:24:31,440
Speaker 2: is because when you when you voluntary give up your car,

487
00:24:31,600 --> 00:24:34,040
Speaker 2: the dealership or the lender, whoever owns it is gonna

488
00:24:34,040 --> 00:24:36,120
Speaker 2: try and sell it. And if they can't sell it,

489
00:24:36,200 --> 00:24:39,160
Speaker 2: if they can't sell it, ad enough value to cover

490
00:24:39,200 --> 00:24:41,639
Speaker 2: your out standing loan, then you'll basically owe the balance.

491
00:24:41,720 --> 00:24:45,800
Speaker 1: Right, Yes, But but here's the thing, like, well, I'm

492
00:24:45,800 --> 00:24:48,120
Speaker 1: assuming you're she's not late, So let me not say

493
00:24:48,119 --> 00:24:51,199
Speaker 1: for sure that the voluntary repossession is gonna it's gonna

494
00:24:51,400 --> 00:24:53,480
Speaker 1: affect your credit because a lot of times people do

495
00:24:53,560 --> 00:24:58,199
Speaker 1: voluntary repossessions because they've missed. And I didn't hear her

496
00:24:58,240 --> 00:25:01,320
Speaker 1: say that she hasn't missed any any payments.

497
00:25:01,359 --> 00:25:04,760
Speaker 2: Correct, it doesn't sound like it. But the repo itself,

498
00:25:04,960 --> 00:25:08,200
Speaker 2: that will go on your credit report like it's one

499
00:25:08,240 --> 00:25:10,280
Speaker 2: of it's like your miss payments would, but also just

500
00:25:10,280 --> 00:25:12,800
Speaker 2: like the fact that you've repote it. But honestly, if

501
00:25:12,800 --> 00:25:14,119
Speaker 2: it's a trade off, like if you feel like you're

502
00:25:14,119 --> 00:25:16,400
Speaker 2: getting close to the point where you're gonna start missing payments,

503
00:25:16,600 --> 00:25:17,800
Speaker 2: that would end up your credit too.

504
00:25:18,240 --> 00:25:21,600
Speaker 3: So it's almost like you know, it's it's it's a give,

505
00:25:21,680 --> 00:25:24,119
Speaker 3: it's a lesser of two evils things. Yeah, and you

506
00:25:24,240 --> 00:25:27,679
Speaker 3: ultimately should do what's best for your finances moving forward,

507
00:25:27,720 --> 00:25:30,240
Speaker 3: and if that means getting up the car, take that.

508
00:25:30,240 --> 00:25:32,720
Speaker 1: And sometimes I say sometimes sometimes it's like you have

509
00:25:32,760 --> 00:25:34,119
Speaker 1: to take the little L so you don't have to

510
00:25:34,119 --> 00:25:36,720
Speaker 1: take the big L later because there are moments as

511
00:25:36,720 --> 00:25:40,359
Speaker 1: an adult where either way you're taking it l you know,

512
00:25:40,520 --> 00:25:42,159
Speaker 1: like L as in loss with some of y'allre like

513
00:25:42,240 --> 00:25:44,959
Speaker 1: what you know, So either way you're going to take

514
00:25:45,000 --> 00:25:48,600
Speaker 1: a loss. So do you have to sometimes ask yourself, like, well,

515
00:25:48,600 --> 00:25:51,520
Speaker 1: which loss is less of a loss? And you know

516
00:25:51,640 --> 00:25:55,359
Speaker 1: it might be you know, giving your car back, paying

517
00:25:55,400 --> 00:25:58,000
Speaker 1: off whatever that balance is that that wasn't able to

518
00:25:58,040 --> 00:26:02,360
Speaker 1: be recouped from the sale of your car, and then rebuilding.

519
00:26:02,400 --> 00:26:04,720
Speaker 1: You're like, you know, credit honestly is not the hardest

520
00:26:04,760 --> 00:26:07,320
Speaker 1: thing to rebuild. It's just making all time payments. If

521
00:26:07,359 --> 00:26:08,920
Speaker 1: you can pay off a credit card in full every

522
00:26:08,960 --> 00:26:11,840
Speaker 1: month by swiping Netflix on it or something, that's going

523
00:26:11,880 --> 00:26:16,120
Speaker 1: to help tremendously, and then you'll be back versus dragging out,

524
00:26:16,320 --> 00:26:19,280
Speaker 1: like having a car that you really can't afford to

525
00:26:19,280 --> 00:26:21,000
Speaker 1: the point where you actually can't afford it, and then

526
00:26:21,000 --> 00:26:25,040
Speaker 1: you're late and now it's not a voluntary repossession, it's

527
00:26:25,080 --> 00:26:27,480
Speaker 1: just a repossession because you haven't made payments.

528
00:26:27,840 --> 00:26:31,520
Speaker 2: Yep. She mentions refinancing her auto loan, and that could

529
00:26:31,560 --> 00:26:33,760
Speaker 2: be a solution, especially if the payments are so high

530
00:26:33,800 --> 00:26:35,760
Speaker 2: that she's struggling with them, and maybe I don't know

531
00:26:35,760 --> 00:26:37,760
Speaker 2: exactly what her APR is, but it sounds like her

532
00:26:37,760 --> 00:26:40,639
Speaker 2: credit was pretty poor. Maybe she thinks she's going to

533
00:26:40,680 --> 00:26:42,879
Speaker 2: get a better interest rate, says her credit score is

534
00:26:42,880 --> 00:26:45,760
Speaker 2: going to be one hundred points higher soon. But my

535
00:26:45,800 --> 00:26:49,200
Speaker 2: thoughts on refinancing is often when people refinance her auto loans,

536
00:26:49,200 --> 00:26:52,719
Speaker 2: they're tempted to draw out the repayment period because if

537
00:26:52,760 --> 00:26:55,200
Speaker 2: you extend your loan over a longer period of time,

538
00:26:55,280 --> 00:26:58,280
Speaker 2: your monthly payments will go down. But you have to

539
00:26:58,320 --> 00:27:00,840
Speaker 2: think about how much interest rate you're adding to the

540
00:27:00,880 --> 00:27:03,400
Speaker 2: cost of that loan over time. And it's it may

541
00:27:03,640 --> 00:27:07,439
Speaker 2: temporarily improve your cash flow, and that could be fine,

542
00:27:07,520 --> 00:27:09,639
Speaker 2: you know, but you have to then think you're not

543
00:27:09,720 --> 00:27:12,640
Speaker 2: really are you really saving money each month? No, yeah,

544
00:27:12,640 --> 00:27:14,960
Speaker 2: because it's very likely that you're just adding to your

545
00:27:15,000 --> 00:27:18,720
Speaker 2: cost by spreading it out over many months. So as

546
00:27:18,720 --> 00:27:21,160
Speaker 2: best you can just try to get try to get

547
00:27:21,160 --> 00:27:23,600
Speaker 2: the you know, the all of all of the ducks

548
00:27:23,600 --> 00:27:25,000
Speaker 2: in a row, like where you have a payment you

549
00:27:25,040 --> 00:27:28,439
Speaker 2: can afford at a decent interest rate and not a

550
00:27:28,520 --> 00:27:32,520
Speaker 2: crazy long repayment term to do that so that you're

551
00:27:32,720 --> 00:27:34,600
Speaker 2: you're not giving the bank any more money than you

552
00:27:34,600 --> 00:27:35,560
Speaker 2: absolutely have to.

553
00:27:36,080 --> 00:27:39,800
Speaker 1: And just remember, like moving forward, getting a car. Honestly,

554
00:27:39,920 --> 00:27:42,440
Speaker 1: I've never had well, when I was in college, my

555
00:27:42,480 --> 00:27:44,080
Speaker 1: dad got looks like a least So I guess that's

556
00:27:44,119 --> 00:27:45,960
Speaker 1: the closest to like a new car that I've had,

557
00:27:46,880 --> 00:27:50,600
Speaker 1: but I've never owned own a brand new car. That

558
00:27:50,600 --> 00:27:53,600
Speaker 1: that that the best way to go, Like, I'll never

559
00:27:53,680 --> 00:27:56,879
Speaker 1: ever get a brand new car. Instead, you can I

560
00:27:56,920 --> 00:27:58,320
Speaker 1: get it that, You're like, I don't want to. There's

561
00:27:58,320 --> 00:28:01,320
Speaker 1: a different there's a there's a everybody thinks like you

562
00:28:01,400 --> 00:28:04,240
Speaker 1: got a huged car has to be like a putt putt,

563
00:28:04,280 --> 00:28:06,360
Speaker 1: you know, like a lemon. Then I have to get

564
00:28:06,359 --> 00:28:08,639
Speaker 1: a new car. There's something in between. You can get

565
00:28:08,640 --> 00:28:11,520
Speaker 1: a car that's two years old. That's what I have now. Well,

566
00:28:11,600 --> 00:28:13,840
Speaker 1: when I got it, and it was certified pre one,

567
00:28:14,200 --> 00:28:17,600
Speaker 1: meaning that they brought it up to speed as a

568
00:28:17,600 --> 00:28:20,959
Speaker 1: new car. And what's so great about that is that

569
00:28:21,000 --> 00:28:24,560
Speaker 1: certified pre oonne means that there's typically a warranty and

570
00:28:24,840 --> 00:28:27,720
Speaker 1: it ranges. I would say, what I typically see it

571
00:28:27,760 --> 00:28:29,760
Speaker 1: is like one hundred thousand miles or like six years

572
00:28:29,880 --> 00:28:32,399
Speaker 1: or sometimes ten years. So what that means is like

573
00:28:32,400 --> 00:28:35,680
Speaker 1: my husband, now his car was making some noise, so

574
00:28:35,720 --> 00:28:38,480
Speaker 1: he too has a certified pre owned car and it

575
00:28:38,560 --> 00:28:40,920
Speaker 1: was making some noise dropped it after the dealership they

576
00:28:40,960 --> 00:28:43,960
Speaker 1: gave him a loaner and they're like, oh, it's the

577
00:28:44,080 --> 00:28:48,000
Speaker 1: gasket and the dada, but whatever, he's gonna pay nothing

578
00:28:48,560 --> 00:28:51,320
Speaker 1: because it's certified pre onn That means all of those

579
00:28:51,360 --> 00:28:57,080
Speaker 1: things are covered, and they they've certified that for I

580
00:28:57,160 --> 00:28:59,440
Speaker 1: think it's six years up to one hundred thousand miles,

581
00:28:59,600 --> 00:29:01,440
Speaker 1: and so he's still has like four more years on it,

582
00:29:01,480 --> 00:29:04,000
Speaker 1: and his car only has thirty thousand miles, So seventy

583
00:29:04,000 --> 00:29:07,360
Speaker 1: thousand miles or four more years, whatever comes first, anything

584
00:29:07,480 --> 00:29:11,360
Speaker 1: that has to do with like the interior of the car,

585
00:29:11,560 --> 00:29:14,840
Speaker 1: that things that are like covered by the warranty, which

586
00:29:14,920 --> 00:29:17,280
Speaker 1: is most things. Then it's not like if he gets

587
00:29:17,280 --> 00:29:18,880
Speaker 1: to flat tire, he has to pay for that. Obviously

588
00:29:19,080 --> 00:29:20,920
Speaker 1: he doesn't have to pay for that. And so that's

589
00:29:20,920 --> 00:29:23,800
Speaker 1: what I would suggest to people. Certifi pre own is

590
00:29:23,880 --> 00:29:27,520
Speaker 1: like my babe, because you get to take the edge

591
00:29:27,560 --> 00:29:31,000
Speaker 1: off of depreciation by not getting a brand new car,

592
00:29:31,520 --> 00:29:33,320
Speaker 1: but you still get the flavor of a brand new

593
00:29:33,400 --> 00:29:35,520
Speaker 1: car because your car is typically a year or two

594
00:29:35,640 --> 00:29:39,240
Speaker 1: or max. Three years old, but you've got you've got

595
00:29:39,280 --> 00:29:42,080
Speaker 1: a warranty that really covers your car.

596
00:29:42,200 --> 00:29:45,240
Speaker 2: Fully, that's what I warranty that are.

597
00:29:45,760 --> 00:29:48,640
Speaker 1: I can't remember it was either it's either six years.

598
00:29:48,720 --> 00:29:50,520
Speaker 1: I think it might be six years, not ten years,

599
00:29:50,720 --> 00:29:52,480
Speaker 1: but I have seen that ten years, but I think

600
00:29:52,520 --> 00:29:57,280
Speaker 1: it's six years certified six years up to I want

601
00:29:57,280 --> 00:29:59,240
Speaker 1: to say one hundred thousand miles, but I don't. I

602
00:29:59,280 --> 00:30:01,360
Speaker 1: don't remember eat actly. But like the only thing of

603
00:30:01,400 --> 00:30:03,280
Speaker 1: the reason why I came up is because literally today

604
00:30:03,760 --> 00:30:05,000
Speaker 1: he was like, I had to drop off the car.

605
00:30:05,040 --> 00:30:07,000
Speaker 1: I was making some noise and asked, well, what did

606
00:30:07,040 --> 00:30:09,160
Speaker 1: they say? He said they were telling him this and

607
00:30:09,200 --> 00:30:11,560
Speaker 1: this and this and that. He's like, okay, whatever, and

608
00:30:11,600 --> 00:30:13,360
Speaker 1: he was like, you know, I was like, you know what,

609
00:30:13,360 --> 00:30:14,640
Speaker 1: what do you have to pay? He's like, I just

610
00:30:14,640 --> 00:30:16,080
Speaker 1: asked him to oil change, So I just have to

611
00:30:16,080 --> 00:30:18,240
Speaker 1: pay for the oil change. And I was like, chitching,

612
00:30:18,480 --> 00:30:20,120
Speaker 1: That's why I love me A certified pre own.

613
00:30:20,560 --> 00:30:24,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's an amazing warranty. All right, Well, thank you

614
00:30:25,000 --> 00:30:28,680
Speaker 2: very much for your question. Let's take one more. This

615
00:30:28,720 --> 00:30:31,400
Speaker 2: one comes from an Instagram user who'd like to remain anonymous.

616
00:30:31,520 --> 00:30:34,000
Speaker 2: She says, I recently found out I'm pregnant and I

617
00:30:34,040 --> 00:30:37,280
Speaker 2: was wondering about starting a baby savings fund. Do you

618
00:30:37,280 --> 00:30:39,960
Speaker 2: guys think this is necessary? If so, how much money

619
00:30:39,960 --> 00:30:42,640
Speaker 2: should be saved before baby gets here? We have ten

620
00:30:42,760 --> 00:30:45,640
Speaker 2: k saved in an emergency fund and plan to pay

621
00:30:45,680 --> 00:30:48,640
Speaker 2: at least thirty K and loans before the baby arrives.

622
00:30:49,120 --> 00:30:51,880
Speaker 2: Our money is being stretched thin with a new house, loans,

623
00:30:51,880 --> 00:30:53,840
Speaker 2: et cetera. But we're trying to get our life together.

624
00:30:54,240 --> 00:30:57,719
Speaker 2: Thanks you too, love listening to you. Oh girl, I

625
00:30:57,720 --> 00:31:01,600
Speaker 2: can identify a ten K. Say, that's awesome. You got

626
00:31:01,600 --> 00:31:03,360
Speaker 2: a plan to pay off thirty K and loans before

627
00:31:03,360 --> 00:31:08,080
Speaker 2: the baby arrives. That is also awesome. Let's see me

628
00:31:08,200 --> 00:31:10,760
Speaker 2: not being a financial planner. What do I think is important?

629
00:31:10,760 --> 00:31:13,920
Speaker 2: I think it's important that you guys focus on problems

630
00:31:13,960 --> 00:31:16,120
Speaker 2: in front of you right now, which obviously the loans

631
00:31:16,760 --> 00:31:19,040
Speaker 2: and paying off debt is a form of savings, to

632
00:31:19,080 --> 00:31:23,160
Speaker 2: be honest. At the same time, though ten thousand dollars

633
00:31:23,280 --> 00:31:25,840
Speaker 2: isn't a you know, it's not a bad start for

634
00:31:25,880 --> 00:31:28,880
Speaker 2: an emergency fund. I don't. And in fact, if your

635
00:31:28,960 --> 00:31:32,000
Speaker 2: cost of living is such that that really is something

636
00:31:32,120 --> 00:31:35,120
Speaker 2: like you know, a year's worth of of you know,

637
00:31:35,160 --> 00:31:37,520
Speaker 2: monthly expenses or a half a year or whatever. It's

638
00:31:37,560 --> 00:31:40,880
Speaker 2: not a bad start at all. It really comes down

639
00:31:40,920 --> 00:31:43,320
Speaker 2: to take a look at what it takes you guys

640
00:31:43,320 --> 00:31:46,560
Speaker 2: to live. Add in this is what my financial planner

641
00:31:46,600 --> 00:31:49,720
Speaker 2: told me to do. Add in any additional cost for

642
00:31:49,800 --> 00:31:52,640
Speaker 2: the child. So kind of do a rough estimate of

643
00:31:52,680 --> 00:31:55,840
Speaker 2: things like food and oh my god, thousands of diapers

644
00:31:56,560 --> 00:32:00,160
Speaker 2: and childcare should you need childcare the first year and

645
00:32:00,200 --> 00:32:03,880
Speaker 2: add that to your your monthly you know, essentials in

646
00:32:03,960 --> 00:32:06,000
Speaker 2: terms of like here's what we need to live, and

647
00:32:06,040 --> 00:32:08,480
Speaker 2: then multiply that by she told us by a year,

648
00:32:08,720 --> 00:32:11,240
Speaker 2: by twelve months, and she said when you have a kid,

649
00:32:11,280 --> 00:32:14,800
Speaker 2: she really encourages people to have a fund save for

650
00:32:14,920 --> 00:32:17,520
Speaker 2: a full year. And for us, I was a certain number.

651
00:32:17,520 --> 00:32:19,920
Speaker 2: For you guys might be a little bit different. That

652
00:32:20,040 --> 00:32:22,480
Speaker 2: being said, you know, ten k' is a good start.

653
00:32:22,880 --> 00:32:25,480
Speaker 2: I want to I want to say, paying off your

654
00:32:25,480 --> 00:32:27,560
Speaker 2: debt is just going to make you feel so much

655
00:32:27,600 --> 00:32:31,240
Speaker 2: more prepared for the baby. This year, I told you, guys,

656
00:32:31,240 --> 00:32:32,880
Speaker 2: you know, we had a we had a zero percent

657
00:32:32,920 --> 00:32:34,600
Speaker 2: interest credit card that we used for a lot of

658
00:32:34,600 --> 00:32:36,840
Speaker 2: stuff for the house that we were chipping a. We

659
00:32:36,880 --> 00:32:38,360
Speaker 2: had a plan to chip it away but as soon

660
00:32:38,400 --> 00:32:40,800
Speaker 2: as I got pregnant, that car drove me nuts. I

661
00:32:40,880 --> 00:32:43,760
Speaker 2: hated it, and I was not happy until that car

662
00:32:43,920 --> 00:32:45,920
Speaker 2: was done. And we finished it like six minutes early,

663
00:32:46,440 --> 00:32:49,320
Speaker 2: six months early, and it just gave me peace of

664
00:32:49,360 --> 00:32:52,840
Speaker 2: mind to have that out of the way. I don't

665
00:32:52,880 --> 00:32:55,280
Speaker 2: have a five to two nine plan setup. I don't

666
00:32:55,320 --> 00:32:58,600
Speaker 2: have an investment fund for my future child at all.

667
00:32:59,080 --> 00:33:04,320
Speaker 2: We're focusing on and we're focusing on almost, We're not almost.

668
00:33:04,480 --> 00:33:07,080
Speaker 2: We're focusing on increasing our emergency fund, a factor in

669
00:33:07,080 --> 00:33:10,160
Speaker 2: the additional cost of childcare, which we hopefully won't have

670
00:33:10,200 --> 00:33:13,160
Speaker 2: to pay for next year, but for twenty twenty. And

671
00:33:13,200 --> 00:33:16,280
Speaker 2: that's the focus for now, just that cash fund. And

672
00:33:16,320 --> 00:33:19,080
Speaker 2: I think, you know, I think I have time. I'm

673
00:33:19,120 --> 00:33:21,600
Speaker 2: not putting so much pressure on myself to have an

674
00:33:21,600 --> 00:33:24,640
Speaker 2: investment fund set up. Maybe I'll start one just so

675
00:33:24,680 --> 00:33:27,840
Speaker 2: that the grandparents can start contributing to it, but I'm

676
00:33:27,880 --> 00:33:32,240
Speaker 2: more I'm I would be more worried about the fund

677
00:33:32,560 --> 00:33:35,480
Speaker 2: that will support our family if the worst happens, you know,

678
00:33:35,480 --> 00:33:38,320
Speaker 2: if our income goes away, so we won't have to

679
00:33:38,320 --> 00:33:42,480
Speaker 2: rely on credit cards and other loans and the all

680
00:33:42,480 --> 00:33:45,160
Speaker 2: the fancy and you know, investment funds and stuff that

681
00:33:45,200 --> 00:33:48,320
Speaker 2: can come a little bit later. It'll be it'll be fine.

682
00:33:48,720 --> 00:33:50,520
Speaker 2: That's my philosophy. But I'm not thinking.

683
00:33:51,160 --> 00:33:54,280
Speaker 1: Fancy, right because one of the things I'm like looking into,

684
00:33:54,360 --> 00:33:56,440
Speaker 1: like I'm like, you know, like a simple target date

685
00:33:56,480 --> 00:33:59,160
Speaker 1: fund for like your you know, like this is like

686
00:33:59,200 --> 00:34:02,280
Speaker 1: a so not for like currently for the baby, but

687
00:34:02,360 --> 00:34:03,640
Speaker 1: like if you're like, you know what we want to

688
00:34:03,840 --> 00:34:06,320
Speaker 1: put aside one hundred bucks a month, and you know,

689
00:34:06,920 --> 00:34:09,719
Speaker 1: target date funds usually, so usually target date funds are

690
00:34:09,760 --> 00:34:12,719
Speaker 1: typically for like retirement, but they don't have to be right,

691
00:34:12,760 --> 00:34:15,200
Speaker 1: so you can do just a regular investment target date

692
00:34:15,280 --> 00:34:19,000
Speaker 1: fund for your child. So you're like, oh, my child

693
00:34:19,080 --> 00:34:21,839
Speaker 1: is one or two or ten or whatever, and then

694
00:34:21,920 --> 00:34:25,360
Speaker 1: you choose the target date and usually they're like usually

695
00:34:25,400 --> 00:34:28,239
Speaker 1: the like say it's like Vanguard, they'll have the target date.

696
00:34:28,239 --> 00:34:31,040
Speaker 1: They'll actually say two thousand and sixty five, two thousand

697
00:34:31,040 --> 00:34:34,279
Speaker 1: and seventy, so usually it's like five year increments. And

698
00:34:34,360 --> 00:34:37,759
Speaker 1: so you'll say, like, okay, maybe the target date fund,

699
00:34:37,800 --> 00:34:40,960
Speaker 1: you're wanting it for college, so you add, you know,

700
00:34:41,560 --> 00:34:43,840
Speaker 1: your child is one, so you're like, okay, in eighteen

701
00:34:43,920 --> 00:34:47,279
Speaker 1: years or fifteen years or whatever. You know, I want

702
00:34:47,280 --> 00:34:50,960
Speaker 1: to have access to this money, but not even I

703
00:34:51,000 --> 00:34:53,279
Speaker 1: want access, because if it's a regular investment account, you

704
00:34:53,320 --> 00:34:55,600
Speaker 1: can always have access. But what it does is that

705
00:34:56,000 --> 00:35:00,000
Speaker 1: you know you can put money in their monthly or

706
00:35:00,080 --> 00:35:02,560
Speaker 1: or when however often that you want. And what's so

707
00:35:02,600 --> 00:35:04,840
Speaker 1: great about a target date fund is that every balance

708
00:35:04,920 --> 00:35:08,839
Speaker 1: is itself at least once a year based upon the

709
00:35:08,880 --> 00:35:11,640
Speaker 1: age of the person, well not so much the age

710
00:35:11,680 --> 00:35:14,239
Speaker 1: of the person, but of when the actual target date is.

711
00:35:14,280 --> 00:35:17,040
Speaker 1: Because the closer you get to the target date, the

712
00:35:17,120 --> 00:35:20,839
Speaker 1: less risky your investments get. So in the beginning, if

713
00:35:20,880 --> 00:35:23,080
Speaker 1: your target date is twenty years away, you're likely going

714
00:35:23,120 --> 00:35:27,080
Speaker 1: to be more heavily invested into stocks, and the closer

715
00:35:27,080 --> 00:35:28,960
Speaker 1: you get to the target date, it's probably going to

716
00:35:29,000 --> 00:35:31,799
Speaker 1: be closer closer and more heavily invested into bonds. But

717
00:35:31,840 --> 00:35:33,560
Speaker 1: you don't have to worry about all that. You're just

718
00:35:33,600 --> 00:35:35,879
Speaker 1: putting your two hundred bucks a month in and it's

719
00:35:35,920 --> 00:35:39,040
Speaker 1: going to invest for you and balance itself for you,

720
00:35:39,360 --> 00:35:41,720
Speaker 1: and by the time your kid is fifteen or eighteen

721
00:35:41,840 --> 00:35:45,000
Speaker 1: or whatever, you have like this money that you set aside,

722
00:35:45,040 --> 00:35:47,520
Speaker 1: and it's done better than a savings account, and you

723
00:35:47,560 --> 00:35:50,680
Speaker 1: didn't have to worry about like shifting around investments because

724
00:35:50,680 --> 00:35:53,080
Speaker 1: it's done it for you. So I tell people, putting

725
00:35:53,080 --> 00:35:54,719
Speaker 1: money in the target date fund is just as easy

726
00:35:54,760 --> 00:35:56,480
Speaker 1: as putting money in a savings account, So why not

727
00:35:56,520 --> 00:36:01,000
Speaker 1: just do that, you know, But that's for like I said,

728
00:36:01,040 --> 00:36:04,279
Speaker 1: for long term stay, long term growth and investment for

729
00:36:04,320 --> 00:36:04,760
Speaker 1: your baby.

730
00:36:05,239 --> 00:36:07,040
Speaker 2: And the thing with the five two nine plan tree

731
00:36:07,080 --> 00:36:10,160
Speaker 2: member is that you know you could only use those

732
00:36:10,200 --> 00:36:14,120
Speaker 2: expenses for education. You can. You can now use it

733
00:36:14,160 --> 00:36:15,839
Speaker 2: to pay for K through twelve, like if you want

734
00:36:15,880 --> 00:36:17,440
Speaker 2: to send them to a private school, it can help

735
00:36:17,440 --> 00:36:20,879
Speaker 2: pay for that tuition. But still, like if you if

736
00:36:20,920 --> 00:36:23,040
Speaker 2: your kid doesn't go to college, you have to find

737
00:36:23,080 --> 00:36:25,440
Speaker 2: another way to use that money for education. You can't.

738
00:36:26,239 --> 00:36:28,600
Speaker 2: It's the only way you can transfer it to another child,

739
00:36:29,080 --> 00:36:31,360
Speaker 2: and it's kind of anyway. So that's that's the downside.

740
00:36:31,400 --> 00:36:32,839
Speaker 2: So I agree. I mean, if you're going to try

741
00:36:32,880 --> 00:36:35,719
Speaker 2: and invest, you could just open an iray, you know,

742
00:36:35,880 --> 00:36:38,480
Speaker 2: or a brokerage account or whatnot and start investing that

743
00:36:38,520 --> 00:36:41,120
Speaker 2: way for your kid. There's a lot of good articles

744
00:36:41,160 --> 00:36:43,520
Speaker 2: out there on like pros and cons of you know,

745
00:36:43,560 --> 00:36:46,160
Speaker 2: of roth iray versus a five two nine plan. And

746
00:36:46,360 --> 00:36:48,160
Speaker 2: I'll try and share some links in the show notes

747
00:36:48,200 --> 00:36:48,720
Speaker 2: for you guys.

748
00:36:49,320 --> 00:36:51,400
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm so nervous about by two nine plans right

749
00:36:51,360 --> 00:36:52,920
Speaker 1: because I'm just like, oh, what if my kid, I mean,

750
00:36:52,960 --> 00:36:54,160
Speaker 1: even though I know you can use it for like

751
00:36:54,360 --> 00:36:56,759
Speaker 1: education now, like you know, but I'm like, what if

752
00:36:56,760 --> 00:36:58,480
Speaker 1: I you know, who knows what college is going to be?

753
00:36:58,960 --> 00:37:02,280
Speaker 2: Am I selfish for thinking that? Sorry to interrupt you, Okay,

754
00:37:02,440 --> 00:37:04,479
Speaker 2: Am I selfish for thinking all we do is interrut

755
00:37:04,480 --> 00:37:05,879
Speaker 2: each other? What are we talking? What am I talking about?

756
00:37:07,480 --> 00:37:13,000
Speaker 2: Talk over each other the whole time? Anyway? Politely? I

757
00:37:13,000 --> 00:37:16,680
Speaker 2: I part of me is like, I'd rather isn't my

758
00:37:16,760 --> 00:37:19,160
Speaker 2: kid gonna be a genius? Won't they get scholarships? Like

759
00:37:19,560 --> 00:37:21,120
Speaker 2: you know, I figured out how to pay for school.

760
00:37:21,160 --> 00:37:22,920
Speaker 2: I part of me is sort of like, I'm not

761
00:37:23,000 --> 00:37:27,640
Speaker 2: so worried about, you know, completely financing I'm not. I

762
00:37:27,719 --> 00:37:31,440
Speaker 2: just won't completely finance college education. I mean there are

763
00:37:31,480 --> 00:37:33,720
Speaker 2: other I just know there's so many ways, or hopefully

764
00:37:33,719 --> 00:37:36,240
Speaker 2: there will still be ways for to you know, subsidize

765
00:37:36,280 --> 00:37:38,040
Speaker 2: the cost of education if you get good grades and

766
00:37:38,080 --> 00:37:39,880
Speaker 2: you look for scholarship opportunities, Like I don't want to.

767
00:37:40,360 --> 00:37:41,960
Speaker 2: I don't want to put that pressure all on me

768
00:37:42,080 --> 00:37:45,560
Speaker 2: and and part of my part of the you know,

769
00:37:45,600 --> 00:37:47,360
Speaker 2: the way that I was that I was raised, you know,

770
00:37:47,440 --> 00:37:50,680
Speaker 2: my I I grew up financially insecure for my parents,

771
00:37:50,719 --> 00:37:53,080
Speaker 2: Like I was really worried all the time. But my parents'

772
00:37:53,080 --> 00:37:55,880
Speaker 2: finances I still am. It's something that still worries me,

773
00:37:55,920 --> 00:37:58,480
Speaker 2: and I feel like I need to be financially It

774
00:37:58,600 --> 00:38:01,440
Speaker 2: drives a lot of my motivation for being financially independent.

775
00:38:02,440 --> 00:38:04,759
Speaker 2: Part of me, like when I think about what I

776
00:38:04,760 --> 00:38:07,600
Speaker 2: want to give my child, the gift to them that

777
00:38:07,640 --> 00:38:10,120
Speaker 2: they probably will never appreciate, but I will because what

778
00:38:10,160 --> 00:38:12,480
Speaker 2: I went through. I want to give them the knowledge

779
00:38:12,480 --> 00:38:14,960
Speaker 2: that mom and Dad are okay, Like the knowledge that

780
00:38:15,000 --> 00:38:17,640
Speaker 2: we are financially sound. They don't have to worry about us.

781
00:38:18,120 --> 00:38:19,960
Speaker 2: All they have to do is worry about themselves. And

782
00:38:20,000 --> 00:38:22,880
Speaker 2: I so when I'm approaching my future financially and I

783
00:38:22,960 --> 00:38:25,520
Speaker 2: kind of talk to my financial advisor about this and

784
00:38:25,560 --> 00:38:27,960
Speaker 2: my therapist a little bit, but I want to make

785
00:38:27,960 --> 00:38:30,279
Speaker 2: sure that my husband, like we are right, you know,

786
00:38:30,400 --> 00:38:33,280
Speaker 2: that our finances are in good shape, that our lives

787
00:38:33,280 --> 00:38:36,000
Speaker 2: are rich and whole. And maybe it makes me sound

788
00:38:36,040 --> 00:38:37,840
Speaker 2: selfish and maybe I'm not articulating it right but do

789
00:38:37,840 --> 00:38:40,799
Speaker 2: you kind of get what I'm saying? Like I want

790
00:38:40,800 --> 00:38:43,480
Speaker 2: to set a really good financial foundation for us, so

791
00:38:43,560 --> 00:38:46,960
Speaker 2: that my kid can succeed on their own merit and

792
00:38:47,000 --> 00:38:49,920
Speaker 2: not have to worry about us later. Am I a

793
00:38:50,000 --> 00:38:50,600
Speaker 2: terrible parent?

794
00:38:50,640 --> 00:38:52,839
Speaker 1: Now? No? No, because I does. I feel like that's

795
00:38:52,880 --> 00:38:56,759
Speaker 1: how That's how Superman feels. Because here's the thing. To me,

796
00:38:56,880 --> 00:38:58,960
Speaker 1: the best gift a parent can give a child is

797
00:38:59,000 --> 00:39:01,400
Speaker 1: not to be right now actually dependent on them when

798
00:39:01,440 --> 00:39:02,000
Speaker 1: they get older.

799
00:39:02,480 --> 00:39:04,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, And I think the only reason I'm successful is

800
00:39:04,600 --> 00:39:06,160
Speaker 2: because I really I knew I did not have a

801
00:39:06,239 --> 00:39:08,319
Speaker 2: damn safety net. There was no net waiting for me.

802
00:39:08,440 --> 00:39:10,960
Speaker 2: I had to I had to do it, and I don't.

803
00:39:11,239 --> 00:39:13,400
Speaker 2: And kids who grow up with that sense of comfort

804
00:39:13,840 --> 00:39:16,200
Speaker 2: that there's going to be someone, you know, to pick

805
00:39:16,239 --> 00:39:18,360
Speaker 2: them up, or some money to fall back on, or

806
00:39:18,360 --> 00:39:20,959
Speaker 2: some inheritance, I just don't think they try as hard.

807
00:39:21,040 --> 00:39:24,600
Speaker 2: Maybe that's a bad stereotype, but that's that's where my

808
00:39:24,640 --> 00:39:25,840
Speaker 2: head's out. What do you think.

809
00:39:27,280 --> 00:39:29,200
Speaker 1: I think? I mean, I don't think there's anything wrong

810
00:39:29,239 --> 00:39:32,080
Speaker 1: with that. I mean, I I'm really I was always

811
00:39:32,080 --> 00:39:34,239
Speaker 1: really if it was good to know. I mean up

812
00:39:34,320 --> 00:39:36,560
Speaker 1: until like really like recently that I didn't have to

813
00:39:36,560 --> 00:39:39,000
Speaker 1: worry about my parents financially. Then my mom retired like

814
00:39:39,040 --> 00:39:41,680
Speaker 1: a little earlier than anticipated, and then there was a

815
00:39:41,680 --> 00:39:43,319
Speaker 1: little bit of stress there because we were like, Okay,

816
00:39:43,320 --> 00:39:45,319
Speaker 1: so how are we going to help them manage so

817
00:39:46,160 --> 00:39:49,399
Speaker 1: because here's the thing. Your kid figuring out college when

818
00:39:49,400 --> 00:39:51,839
Speaker 1: they're eighteen, ninet to twenty, they have many years ahead

819
00:39:51,840 --> 00:39:54,360
Speaker 1: of them. If by the time they're in college, you

820
00:39:54,440 --> 00:39:59,080
Speaker 1: used to be winding down and figuring out your own retirement.

821
00:39:59,520 --> 00:40:01,880
Speaker 1: And if you're if they're now thinking like, well, how

822
00:40:01,880 --> 00:40:03,399
Speaker 1: am I going to manage my life now? I also

823
00:40:03,400 --> 00:40:06,080
Speaker 1: got to take care of my parents financially. No, put

824
00:40:06,120 --> 00:40:08,560
Speaker 1: your mask on first. I really if you had to

825
00:40:08,600 --> 00:40:12,160
Speaker 1: choose between your child's college education and your retirement, I

826
00:40:12,200 --> 00:40:15,680
Speaker 1: say hands them always your retirement because college educations can

827
00:40:15,719 --> 00:40:18,839
Speaker 1: be figured out a myriad of ways. Your retirement. You know,

828
00:40:19,000 --> 00:40:21,080
Speaker 1: you don't want to be like, I've got five years left.

829
00:40:21,080 --> 00:40:23,839
Speaker 1: We got to make a miracle happen, Like no, no, no, no,

830
00:40:24,000 --> 00:40:25,680
Speaker 1: put your mask on first, just like they tell you

831
00:40:25,719 --> 00:40:26,160
Speaker 1: on a flight.

832
00:40:27,400 --> 00:40:29,239
Speaker 2: That's kind of what I'm getting at. Yeah, so just

833
00:40:29,280 --> 00:40:32,120
Speaker 2: making sure that you're financially signing to the listener who

834
00:40:32,160 --> 00:40:33,960
Speaker 2: asked about the baby fund. You know, they have this

835
00:40:34,120 --> 00:40:37,640
Speaker 2: debt that's weighing on them. You know, setting your kid

836
00:40:37,719 --> 00:40:39,520
Speaker 2: up so that you guys don't have debt is sort

837
00:40:39,520 --> 00:40:42,040
Speaker 2: of a gift in and of itself, and at least

838
00:40:42,040 --> 00:40:45,480
Speaker 2: you know you have a decent enough emergency fund to handle,

839
00:40:45,880 --> 00:40:48,120
Speaker 2: you know, a few setbacks, and it's not like you're

840
00:40:48,160 --> 00:40:51,319
Speaker 2: completely being vulnerable. So paying off that debt and then

841
00:40:51,360 --> 00:40:54,640
Speaker 2: trying to replenish or keep adding to your emergency fund

842
00:40:54,640 --> 00:40:57,640
Speaker 2: to the point where you you know, get to get

843
00:40:57,680 --> 00:40:59,960
Speaker 2: it beefed up now that you have the additional expense

844
00:41:00,120 --> 00:41:02,719
Speaker 2: of a kid coming, I think that's a fair priority

845
00:41:02,840 --> 00:41:05,959
Speaker 2: versus putting money into a college fund. You know you can,

846
00:41:06,440 --> 00:41:10,200
Speaker 2: It's on my list that would probably come third. But

847
00:41:10,280 --> 00:41:12,319
Speaker 2: if you're truly worried about it, you can do what

848
00:41:12,360 --> 00:41:15,000
Speaker 2: I did, which is, you know, chat with a financial

849
00:41:15,040 --> 00:41:18,319
Speaker 2: advisor and they can kind of help honestly verify what

850
00:41:18,360 --> 00:41:21,520
Speaker 2: you already know sometimes but point you in in the

851
00:41:21,560 --> 00:41:24,400
Speaker 2: right direction for for the near future.

852
00:41:40,800 --> 00:41:43,960
Speaker 1: So now it's time to do just to break with

853
00:41:44,160 --> 00:41:48,600
Speaker 1: all our b a family, were gonna booth, were gonna break.

854
00:41:48,960 --> 00:41:49,600
Speaker 1: What we're gonna do.

855
00:41:49,680 --> 00:41:55,000
Speaker 2: Mandy, you always set me up, even though we know

856
00:41:55,040 --> 00:41:57,680
Speaker 2: Tiffany also rhymes that's ship.

857
00:41:57,760 --> 00:41:59,120
Speaker 1: Well, I don't want to say, well, we're gonna do

858
00:41:59,160 --> 00:42:00,120
Speaker 1: Tiffany because it's.

859
00:42:00,080 --> 00:42:03,040
Speaker 2: Like, you know, I'm leave so convenient.

860
00:42:04,000 --> 00:42:07,440
Speaker 1: No, I'm trying to think I got another brown ambish

861
00:42:07,480 --> 00:42:10,359
Speaker 1: and running. What was it? Girl? I want to tell

862
00:42:10,360 --> 00:42:11,800
Speaker 1: you in these streets, they're.

863
00:42:11,600 --> 00:42:12,640
Speaker 2: Loving this podcast.

864
00:42:13,000 --> 00:42:15,600
Speaker 1: It's so awesome for people to want to be like,

865
00:42:16,480 --> 00:42:19,080
Speaker 1: I love you, I love Mandy, I love the podcast.

866
00:42:19,160 --> 00:42:22,280
Speaker 1: Or they'll say something podcasting and I'm like, you listen

867
00:42:23,000 --> 00:42:24,800
Speaker 1: because I amach feel like it's just me and you talking,

868
00:42:25,239 --> 00:42:28,279
Speaker 1: and I'm like, oh, people listen. So that's been happening

869
00:42:28,280 --> 00:42:32,880
Speaker 1: a lot lately. So yeah. Literally, a woman ran up

870
00:42:32,880 --> 00:42:34,399
Speaker 1: to me and she gave me a hug and was like, oh,

871
00:42:34,400 --> 00:42:36,080
Speaker 1: oh I forgot. I forgot, And that's how I knew

872
00:42:36,080 --> 00:42:37,560
Speaker 1: instantly she was like a listener.

873
00:42:39,480 --> 00:42:41,960
Speaker 2: So are you saying that you love hugs now and

874
00:42:42,000 --> 00:42:45,600
Speaker 2: you will accept them on the street. No, that's what

875
00:42:45,600 --> 00:42:46,120
Speaker 2: you're saying.

876
00:42:46,680 --> 00:42:49,920
Speaker 1: I don't hate hugs. I don't hate hugs because dreamcatchers

877
00:42:49,960 --> 00:42:51,160
Speaker 1: are not creepy. I have to say I haven't met

878
00:42:51,200 --> 00:42:54,279
Speaker 1: anyone that's made me feel like girl, but women tend

879
00:42:54,320 --> 00:42:57,640
Speaker 1: not to be creepy, thankfully, so so no, I don't

880
00:42:57,680 --> 00:42:59,759
Speaker 1: hate hugs. I mean, hugs are not my fabe, but

881
00:42:59,800 --> 00:43:02,839
Speaker 1: you are definitely warming me up. And honestly, I do

882
00:43:02,880 --> 00:43:04,680
Speaker 1: love the love. That's one thing I do love. It's

883
00:43:04,719 --> 00:43:06,799
Speaker 1: just I love how much you know you guys are

884
00:43:06,880 --> 00:43:08,600
Speaker 1: like and then it'll be funny because they're like and

885
00:43:08,600 --> 00:43:12,640
Speaker 1: this one's for bandy, Like, Okay.

886
00:43:12,200 --> 00:43:14,000
Speaker 2: I'll take a hug, just don't rub my bump.

887
00:43:14,760 --> 00:43:17,080
Speaker 1: Yeah, that is so rude. So if you don't mind,

888
00:43:17,239 --> 00:43:19,279
Speaker 1: I can. I can go back if you want me to.

889
00:43:20,080 --> 00:43:24,080
Speaker 2: That's fine. I'll go first, just to be fair. It's cool.

890
00:43:25,200 --> 00:43:27,279
Speaker 2: My I don't know all I can think, and I

891
00:43:27,320 --> 00:43:29,799
Speaker 2: was kind of trying to tell Tiffany this all I

892
00:43:29,840 --> 00:43:32,040
Speaker 2: can think right now. And I knew after the baby

893
00:43:32,080 --> 00:43:34,480
Speaker 2: shower it would kind of be like it was like

894
00:43:34,520 --> 00:43:36,160
Speaker 2: the thing I was looking forward to, and then as

895
00:43:36,200 --> 00:43:38,319
Speaker 2: soon as it ended, it would be like the other

896
00:43:38,440 --> 00:43:40,560
Speaker 2: side of the baby shower. We feel so much closer

897
00:43:40,600 --> 00:43:43,000
Speaker 2: to the fact that baby's coming soon. So I'm down

898
00:43:43,000 --> 00:43:47,839
Speaker 2: to five weeks and I am something has I've done

899
00:43:47,840 --> 00:43:49,640
Speaker 2: all this prep and I keep trying. I've been done

900
00:43:49,680 --> 00:43:52,200
Speaker 2: all this prep work. I've been seeing my therapist who

901
00:43:52,239 --> 00:43:55,279
Speaker 2: specializes with new moms. I've been you know, working on

902
00:43:55,320 --> 00:43:58,279
Speaker 2: my transition plan for work, and something about this week,

903
00:43:58,360 --> 00:44:00,279
Speaker 2: I just feel like I don't have enough time, Like

904
00:44:00,320 --> 00:44:02,759
Speaker 2: I'm starting to get a little frazzled. I'm starting to

905
00:44:02,800 --> 00:44:05,680
Speaker 2: get anxious. I'm texting my husband like he's like, what's

906
00:44:05,680 --> 00:44:08,279
Speaker 2: wrong with you? Relax? And I'm just like, we don't

907
00:44:08,320 --> 00:44:10,440
Speaker 2: have the right basinet yet. We don't have this, we

908
00:44:10,440 --> 00:44:14,080
Speaker 2: don't have that, and I I don't know. Maybe it's

909
00:44:14,160 --> 00:44:16,680
Speaker 2: just I don't know the fact that I'm far along

910
00:44:16,680 --> 00:44:20,320
Speaker 2: in my pregnancy, but I'm I don't know how to

911
00:44:19,880 --> 00:44:21,919
Speaker 2: I need to get a grip. I need to get

912
00:44:22,040 --> 00:44:24,880
Speaker 2: a massive grip. So my boost or sorry, my break

913
00:44:24,960 --> 00:44:27,960
Speaker 2: is just for my own anxiety. And I was just

914
00:44:27,960 --> 00:44:30,080
Speaker 2: trying to give myself a pep talk after I got

915
00:44:30,120 --> 00:44:32,360
Speaker 2: off work and be like, listen, if you were a girlfriend,

916
00:44:32,719 --> 00:44:34,879
Speaker 2: you would remind them of all the steps they've taken

917
00:44:34,920 --> 00:44:36,840
Speaker 2: to be prepared for this baby, and you would not

918
00:44:36,880 --> 00:44:39,359
Speaker 2: be freaking out like you are. But I am. It's

919
00:44:39,400 --> 00:44:41,839
Speaker 2: like and I was at a meeting today at work

920
00:44:41,920 --> 00:44:44,560
Speaker 2: and it was this like women and leadership at my

921
00:44:44,640 --> 00:44:46,919
Speaker 2: company kind of pow wow, And I kind of went

922
00:44:46,960 --> 00:44:49,080
Speaker 2: off on them because I felt like I'm not super

923
00:44:49,080 --> 00:44:53,240
Speaker 2: supported with all the maternity leave stuff at my company,

924
00:44:53,320 --> 00:44:56,480
Speaker 2: Like it's a little convoluted, it's a little confusing, and

925
00:44:56,520 --> 00:44:58,200
Speaker 2: I'm looking at my calendar and I'm like, I only

926
00:44:58,200 --> 00:45:01,120
Speaker 2: have a month left to figure out my my, my

927
00:45:01,600 --> 00:45:04,640
Speaker 2: benefit plan and all that kind of stuff. And I mean,

928
00:45:04,640 --> 00:45:06,680
Speaker 2: it was probably good for me to give them that feedback,

929
00:45:06,680 --> 00:45:10,480
Speaker 2: but it's just little things like that I are just

930
00:45:10,520 --> 00:45:13,239
Speaker 2: not like totally figured out. And I don't have a

931
00:45:13,239 --> 00:45:15,359
Speaker 2: pediatrician yet, and I know I was supposed to do

932
00:45:15,400 --> 00:45:19,040
Speaker 2: that by now. And anyway, I'm sure this is just

933
00:45:19,080 --> 00:45:21,520
Speaker 2: like coming off as rambling, but I'm going a little

934
00:45:21,600 --> 00:45:24,879
Speaker 2: Nutso so maybe you guys can help me. And if

935
00:45:24,920 --> 00:45:26,759
Speaker 2: you were going to give me, like what are the

936
00:45:26,920 --> 00:45:28,680
Speaker 2: what are like the five things I can do this

937
00:45:28,760 --> 00:45:32,320
Speaker 2: week that will make me feel less insane, like less

938
00:45:32,600 --> 00:45:38,839
Speaker 2: ill prepared? You did that mom box is legit. I've

939
00:45:38,880 --> 00:45:40,960
Speaker 2: had moms. I had a couple of moms visiting me,

940
00:45:41,360 --> 00:45:43,839
Speaker 2: like friends of mine, and they were like going, they

941
00:45:43,840 --> 00:45:46,000
Speaker 2: were like, this is perfect for new moms.

942
00:45:47,000 --> 00:45:49,799
Speaker 1: I was, so, you have no idea. I was like researching, researching.

943
00:45:50,000 --> 00:45:52,319
Speaker 1: I was asking I had asked all the unicorn moms

944
00:45:52,320 --> 00:45:54,160
Speaker 1: because we have, like come, just had a baby less

945
00:45:54,200 --> 00:45:57,440
Speaker 1: a year ago, Tamper's baby's like two, we have like

946
00:45:57,640 --> 00:46:00,200
Speaker 1: so I was just asking all these moms and they

947
00:46:00,239 --> 00:46:02,200
Speaker 1: were giving me like a list of things like girl

948
00:46:02,760 --> 00:46:07,680
Speaker 1: nipple cream and and I vaguely remember like a year ago.

949
00:46:08,320 --> 00:46:10,200
Speaker 1: I was like, wait, there was like a box that

950
00:46:10,280 --> 00:46:12,960
Speaker 1: had like all of this stuff that you wouldn't think

951
00:46:13,000 --> 00:46:14,880
Speaker 1: that you knew, because I was like, you're gonna get

952
00:46:14,960 --> 00:46:17,319
Speaker 1: enough onesies, enough, like because I brought at first, I

953
00:46:17,320 --> 00:46:19,000
Speaker 1: bought this cute and I'm still gonna send it to you,

954
00:46:19,000 --> 00:46:21,960
Speaker 1: but I bought this cute little like elephant blanket with

955
00:46:22,000 --> 00:46:24,280
Speaker 1: a little elephant attached to this all. But and I'm like, okay,

956
00:46:24,280 --> 00:46:27,719
Speaker 1: but man's gonna have ten thousand of these like cute

957
00:46:27,760 --> 00:46:29,880
Speaker 1: little things. But like, what about for you?

958
00:46:30,480 --> 00:46:32,839
Speaker 2: And ice packed from my vagina?

959
00:46:33,040 --> 00:46:34,319
Speaker 1: For real? What about that?

960
00:46:34,400 --> 00:46:36,919
Speaker 2: Because I opened that and I was like, yes, yes,

961
00:46:37,239 --> 00:46:39,880
Speaker 2: I will be split in half. You're right, I do

962
00:46:40,040 --> 00:46:44,320
Speaker 2: need this vagina shape. I was so excited.

963
00:46:44,480 --> 00:46:47,040
Speaker 1: I was like wait, and so I googled like mom

964
00:46:47,160 --> 00:46:50,000
Speaker 1: survival kid, first time mom, and then mom mobs popped

965
00:46:50,040 --> 00:46:51,840
Speaker 1: up and that's what I remember. I remember, this is

966
00:46:51,840 --> 00:46:55,000
Speaker 1: what it was. So I got you one and Taylor,

967
00:46:55,160 --> 00:46:57,600
Speaker 1: you should have gotten it by now. Taylor, Well, you

968
00:46:57,640 --> 00:46:59,560
Speaker 1: know Taylor, Taylor Cathley. Do you know she's pregnant?

969
00:47:00,080 --> 00:47:00,799
Speaker 2: Wait, Taylor who?

970
00:47:01,520 --> 00:47:06,960
Speaker 1: Taylor or Taylor who? From Elevate she wrote for Oh,

971
00:47:07,000 --> 00:47:12,040
Speaker 1: Taylor Warden cong Taylor Hay she knew about around the

972
00:47:12,040 --> 00:47:16,440
Speaker 1: same time. And yes, I think she's moving to Germany.

973
00:47:16,480 --> 00:47:19,960
Speaker 1: I don't know. It's a lot anyway, I said, I

974
00:47:20,040 --> 00:47:23,439
Speaker 1: sent Taylor a mom box as well, because so many

975
00:47:23,480 --> 00:47:28,680
Speaker 1: moms were like I remember when when Drina had Gabe

976
00:47:29,120 --> 00:47:33,640
Speaker 1: and my sister Carol had just had whoever came first,

977
00:47:33,880 --> 00:47:36,680
Speaker 1: but they were like I remember her saying, girl, you

978
00:47:36,680 --> 00:47:39,160
Speaker 1: gotta ny nipple cream. Girl, you like all these random

979
00:47:39,200 --> 00:47:42,040
Speaker 1: things that you're like what, And so I just was

980
00:47:42,080 --> 00:47:44,120
Speaker 1: excited to get something that was gonna be for you

981
00:47:44,200 --> 00:47:46,560
Speaker 1: because there's gonna be plenty of things for baby, and

982
00:47:46,640 --> 00:47:49,160
Speaker 1: things that were really gonna be like yes, that were

983
00:47:49,160 --> 00:47:50,840
Speaker 1: really gonna be for real, that was really gonna be

984
00:47:50,840 --> 00:47:53,040
Speaker 1: like helpful like that. You were like I never even

985
00:47:53,080 --> 00:47:55,879
Speaker 1: thought of this, like I you know, like I didn't

986
00:47:55,920 --> 00:47:58,560
Speaker 1: realize like extra hospital underwear and all these kind of things.

987
00:47:58,600 --> 00:48:00,799
Speaker 1: So I was like, yeah, I'm so glad you like it.

988
00:48:00,800 --> 00:48:02,920
Speaker 2: It's perfect. And I was looking on the website. They

989
00:48:02,920 --> 00:48:05,200
Speaker 2: have one for people who are planning a C section

990
00:48:05,320 --> 00:48:08,479
Speaker 2: because they have all kinds of other issues. No, I really,

991
00:48:08,719 --> 00:48:10,480
Speaker 2: it's a it's a. It was such a sweet gift.

992
00:48:10,560 --> 00:48:10,920
Speaker 2: Thank you.

993
00:48:13,719 --> 00:48:16,080
Speaker 1: Andy got sent me some really beautiful flowers. Honestly, they

994
00:48:16,120 --> 00:48:16,879
Speaker 1: were gorgeous.

995
00:48:17,160 --> 00:48:19,279
Speaker 2: Oh good. It's hard because you don't get to see them,

996
00:48:19,360 --> 00:48:21,480
Speaker 2: so you know, I went local. It was someone that

997
00:48:21,520 --> 00:48:22,840
Speaker 2: it was a florist in Newark.

998
00:48:23,480 --> 00:48:25,320
Speaker 1: No, it was perfect. It was. They were so beautiful

999
00:48:25,320 --> 00:48:27,160
Speaker 1: that I ended up for the party making them like

1000
00:48:27,200 --> 00:48:30,000
Speaker 1: a centerpiece and then getting other similar bouquets. And I

1001
00:48:30,120 --> 00:48:32,240
Speaker 1: usually as a picture, like I want four other bouquets

1002
00:48:32,280 --> 00:48:35,600
Speaker 1: for the tables. So they were like beautiful. And I

1003
00:48:35,640 --> 00:48:37,920
Speaker 1: love autumn covers, so let's I love that stuff in here.

1004
00:48:37,920 --> 00:48:40,960
Speaker 2: I know you guys are like, okay, no, you need

1005
00:48:41,000 --> 00:48:43,440
Speaker 2: to hear me complain, but seriously, though, if you have

1006
00:48:43,560 --> 00:48:45,440
Speaker 2: any tips or struct or you just want to tell me.

1007
00:48:45,520 --> 00:48:45,719
Speaker 1: Girl.

1008
00:48:45,760 --> 00:48:48,839
Speaker 2: I was freaking out too, and I survived. I feel

1009
00:48:48,880 --> 00:48:51,879
Speaker 2: like we're prepared but it's just it's just it's coming, man.

1010
00:48:52,400 --> 00:48:57,040
Speaker 2: Five weeks, five short weeks, or as everyone has been

1011
00:48:57,040 --> 00:48:59,479
Speaker 2: telling me. I feel like everyone who ever delivered early

1012
00:48:59,480 --> 00:49:01,200
Speaker 2: has been telling me their stories this week, and I'm like,

1013
00:49:01,200 --> 00:49:03,000
Speaker 2: can you please not tell me these? I did not.

1014
00:49:03,560 --> 00:49:05,839
Speaker 2: I've never entertained the idea of delivering early, but now

1015
00:49:05,880 --> 00:49:07,840
Speaker 2: I'm freaking out that I'm just going to go into labor,

1016
00:49:08,320 --> 00:49:10,239
Speaker 2: like on the flight home tomorrow, and then what am

1017
00:49:10,280 --> 00:49:10,719
Speaker 2: I going to do?

1018
00:49:11,560 --> 00:49:13,759
Speaker 1: I'll say this, so just remember this because I remember

1019
00:49:13,760 --> 00:49:16,400
Speaker 1: when I went to go visit my sister and she,

1020
00:49:17,120 --> 00:49:20,160
Speaker 1: you know, I had to tell her. Okay, so remember

1021
00:49:20,200 --> 00:49:24,640
Speaker 1: that your husband is also a new parent, So just

1022
00:49:24,719 --> 00:49:25,480
Speaker 1: keep that in mind.

1023
00:49:26,040 --> 00:49:27,560
Speaker 2: What does that mean that they can help too?

1024
00:49:28,400 --> 00:49:31,400
Speaker 1: No, but meaning that, like because she was snappish and

1025
00:49:31,440 --> 00:49:35,480
Speaker 1: I was like, oh, be nice.

1026
00:49:35,640 --> 00:49:38,799
Speaker 2: Oh at him? Oh yeah, he did have the audacity

1027
00:49:38,840 --> 00:49:40,640
Speaker 2: to get sick this weekend, And I was like, mother,

1028
00:49:40,960 --> 00:49:43,520
Speaker 2: what is wrong with you? Go get First of all,

1029
00:49:43,600 --> 00:49:46,080
Speaker 2: hasn't gotten a flu shot yet, should have done that already.

1030
00:49:46,120 --> 00:49:48,160
Speaker 2: Second of all, had the audacity to get ill. I

1031
00:49:48,239 --> 00:49:49,960
Speaker 2: had to take care of him this weekend, and I'm like,

1032
00:49:50,040 --> 00:49:53,720
Speaker 2: I would dare you can't you microwave for your own soup.

1033
00:49:55,640 --> 00:49:57,040
Speaker 2: We don't have a best at that yet.

1034
00:49:57,440 --> 00:50:01,680
Speaker 1: Like, just remember that that like gonna seem like it's

1035
00:50:01,800 --> 00:50:03,920
Speaker 1: me against the world, and it's like, well, you know

1036
00:50:04,000 --> 00:50:06,200
Speaker 1: you're not the only new parent in the mix, and

1037
00:50:06,200 --> 00:50:10,000
Speaker 1: that you know that it's also scary and stressful and

1038
00:50:10,040 --> 00:50:12,840
Speaker 1: everything for him too, And it's hard because you know,

1039
00:50:12,920 --> 00:50:16,000
Speaker 1: especially if you're gonna breastfeed, it's really hard because you know,

1040
00:50:16,239 --> 00:50:18,040
Speaker 1: like baby is like I don't know who that guy

1041
00:50:18,120 --> 00:50:21,799
Speaker 1: is you with the boobs come here? And so that

1042
00:50:21,840 --> 00:50:24,120
Speaker 1: part is like a little bit difficult because you know,

1043
00:50:24,160 --> 00:50:26,000
Speaker 1: men want to help, but there's only so much when

1044
00:50:26,000 --> 00:50:27,480
Speaker 1: babies are like do you have boobs? Okay?

1045
00:50:27,480 --> 00:50:30,239
Speaker 2: Then go on you is this with me? Am I

1046
00:50:30,239 --> 00:50:31,359
Speaker 2: feeling better after this?

1047
00:50:31,520 --> 00:50:34,839
Speaker 1: Or I'm just like you know that, like it's gonna

1048
00:50:34,840 --> 00:50:37,280
Speaker 1: be easy to be frustrated with him, but just understanding

1049
00:50:37,280 --> 00:50:39,200
Speaker 1: that both of you are new parents, that you're not

1050
00:50:39,280 --> 00:50:41,839
Speaker 1: the only new parent and so I.

1051
00:50:41,840 --> 00:50:46,560
Speaker 2: Can't verbally abuse him. Got it.

1052
00:50:48,000 --> 00:50:52,279
Speaker 1: For a minute, I was just like okay, dually knowing it.

1053
00:50:52,400 --> 00:50:54,399
Speaker 1: But now honestly, it's so awesome, like to see them

1054
00:50:54,840 --> 00:50:58,040
Speaker 1: like they're so like we visited them, they're so you know,

1055
00:50:58,200 --> 00:51:00,359
Speaker 1: and like I said in the beginning, everyone's feing out

1056
00:51:00,360 --> 00:51:02,320
Speaker 1: the babies like where am I? Where am I? Parents

1057
00:51:02,360 --> 00:51:04,200
Speaker 1: are like who am I? Where am I? And then

1058
00:51:04,680 --> 00:51:07,160
Speaker 1: it gels and then one day you're like, we got this.

1059
00:51:07,320 --> 00:51:11,920
Speaker 2: So yeah, okay, thanks letting me, let me, let me

1060
00:51:11,920 --> 00:51:12,759
Speaker 2: get off my chest.

1061
00:51:13,719 --> 00:51:15,440
Speaker 1: And I was gonna be so in love honestly, like

1062
00:51:15,520 --> 00:51:17,680
Speaker 1: I my niece and my nephews, I'm like, oh my god,

1063
00:51:17,680 --> 00:51:21,520
Speaker 1: when they leave, I'm like totally, like I can't imagine,

1064
00:51:21,560 --> 00:51:23,239
Speaker 1: like the love of your own child. You're going to

1065
00:51:23,320 --> 00:51:26,279
Speaker 1: be like so in love, so that will outweigh any

1066
00:51:26,360 --> 00:51:29,759
Speaker 1: other feeling of like fear and this and that and

1067
00:51:29,920 --> 00:51:35,800
Speaker 1: you know, but yeah, blister, well did it have nipple

1068
00:51:35,840 --> 00:51:37,279
Speaker 1: chapstick in there or whatever that is?

1069
00:51:37,520 --> 00:51:39,799
Speaker 2: Nipple cream? Yes, thank you very much for that. I

1070
00:51:39,840 --> 00:51:42,040
Speaker 2: put on my registry. People don't want touch that. Apparently.

1071
00:51:44,680 --> 00:51:48,040
Speaker 1: I was like, I'm getting thank you.

1072
00:51:47,400 --> 00:51:49,680
Speaker 2: My boob, say thank you in advance.

1073
00:51:50,840 --> 00:51:53,319
Speaker 1: All right, So I am going to boost as well,

1074
00:51:54,239 --> 00:51:57,880
Speaker 1: because like, I can't remember what the question was the

1075
00:51:57,920 --> 00:52:01,120
Speaker 1: last time we recorded where, but I remember our answer

1076
00:52:01,280 --> 00:52:05,400
Speaker 1: was about thinking audaciously and thinking big and practicing speaking

1077
00:52:05,440 --> 00:52:08,920
Speaker 1: the thing you went out loud. So I spoke something

1078
00:52:08,920 --> 00:52:12,000
Speaker 1: out loud during our last recording and it like came true,

1079
00:52:12,000 --> 00:52:15,280
Speaker 1: and I was like, WHOA. So I didn't even remember

1080
00:52:15,400 --> 00:52:17,479
Speaker 1: so what it was, I can't remember, Like I said,

1081
00:52:17,480 --> 00:52:19,279
Speaker 1: whatever the question was, and I think, like I said,

1082
00:52:19,280 --> 00:52:21,320
Speaker 1: the solution was, I said, say it out loud, speaking

1083
00:52:21,400 --> 00:52:24,600
Speaker 1: out loud, think audaciously, and I said, my big, crazy, wild,

1084
00:52:24,640 --> 00:52:28,680
Speaker 1: audacious goal is I have a children's book, Molly Moore,

1085
00:52:28,719 --> 00:52:31,800
Speaker 1: that had written. The illustrations are done, we're just finishing

1086
00:52:31,840 --> 00:52:35,680
Speaker 1: up the graphic design. So my big audacious goal was

1087
00:52:35,960 --> 00:52:38,880
Speaker 1: Molly Moore, my children's book that I just finished writing,

1088
00:52:38,920 --> 00:52:42,000
Speaker 1: my first one. For it to be a billion dollar business,

1089
00:52:42,400 --> 00:52:44,799
Speaker 1: for it to have its own for Molly to have

1090
00:52:44,840 --> 00:52:49,759
Speaker 1: her own TV show, merchandise, a book series, just like,

1091
00:52:50,320 --> 00:52:53,080
Speaker 1: for basically Molly Moore to be the next door. That's

1092
00:52:53,120 --> 00:52:57,160
Speaker 1: my big, crazy, audacious goal. So I said it as

1093
00:52:57,200 --> 00:53:00,440
Speaker 1: an exercise to the BA listener that wrote in their

1094
00:53:00,520 --> 00:53:02,560
Speaker 1: question about I guess how to think big, or something

1095
00:53:02,600 --> 00:53:05,319
Speaker 1: to that effect. Don't you know somebody I won't say

1096
00:53:05,360 --> 00:53:08,719
Speaker 1: the network. I'm sorry she's listening. Hey girl, don't you

1097
00:53:08,760 --> 00:53:12,279
Speaker 1: know somebody from a huge, huge, huge I don't think

1098
00:53:12,280 --> 00:53:14,000
Speaker 1: it's cable. I don't know what they call it because

1099
00:53:14,000 --> 00:53:16,439
Speaker 1: I don't watch TV. A huge network reached out said,

1100
00:53:16,880 --> 00:53:20,279
Speaker 1: heard about your book, interested in talking about you know,

1101
00:53:20,280 --> 00:53:23,399
Speaker 1: potentially developing into a show, and I was like, wait,

1102
00:53:23,400 --> 00:53:29,200
Speaker 1: what book A site, unseen book, unread all And it

1103
00:53:29,239 --> 00:53:31,480
Speaker 1: was just such a good lesson that I'm here. I

1104
00:53:31,560 --> 00:53:33,400
Speaker 1: am trying to teach a lesson to the b a listener,

1105
00:53:33,440 --> 00:53:36,840
Speaker 1: and I'm learning a lesson for myself, because the truth is,

1106
00:53:37,600 --> 00:53:39,400
Speaker 1: I said it about Molly Moore, but I don't know

1107
00:53:39,440 --> 00:53:41,719
Speaker 1: if I really believed it. I was just saying it.

1108
00:53:42,239 --> 00:53:45,320
Speaker 1: And what it did was I was learning the lesson myself.

1109
00:53:45,360 --> 00:53:49,319
Speaker 1: And that's really my boost in that thinking and speaking

1110
00:53:49,480 --> 00:53:52,840
Speaker 1: and acting audaciously really does work, and we as women

1111
00:53:52,960 --> 00:53:56,120
Speaker 1: especially have to practice it because we are really taught

1112
00:53:56,400 --> 00:54:00,600
Speaker 1: to remain small, to be polite, to take as little

1113
00:54:00,640 --> 00:54:03,319
Speaker 1: space as possible in this world. And you don't have to.

1114
00:54:03,719 --> 00:54:06,359
Speaker 1: There's nothing wrong if you're like you want something big

1115
00:54:06,400 --> 00:54:09,480
Speaker 1: and huge and ginormous. You never know who's listening. So

1116
00:54:10,520 --> 00:54:13,239
Speaker 1: I mean honestly, like literally she hit me up in

1117
00:54:13,280 --> 00:54:16,800
Speaker 1: my in my in my ig DMS and literally said,

1118
00:54:17,320 --> 00:54:20,399
Speaker 1: heard you on Brown Ambition, heard about your children's book.

1119
00:54:20,960 --> 00:54:23,359
Speaker 1: I love financial education and what you're doing. Let's talk

1120
00:54:23,360 --> 00:54:25,200
Speaker 1: about what it might look like to develop that into

1121
00:54:25,200 --> 00:54:27,759
Speaker 1: a show. And I'm like, is this real life? Is

1122
00:54:27,800 --> 00:54:28,440
Speaker 1: this real life?

1123
00:54:28,640 --> 00:54:31,080
Speaker 2: I love it? So you never know who's listening when

1124
00:54:31,120 --> 00:54:33,560
Speaker 2: you speak out loud too, and we have you know,

1125
00:54:33,600 --> 00:54:36,040
Speaker 2: it's it's kind of like the importance of networking. When

1126
00:54:36,040 --> 00:54:38,200
Speaker 2: we have this audience, we have the show, you never

1127
00:54:38,200 --> 00:54:41,400
Speaker 2: know who's listening. So you know, by speaking, you just

1128
00:54:41,520 --> 00:54:43,359
Speaker 2: you just throw it out there and you just never

1129
00:54:43,440 --> 00:54:44,920
Speaker 2: know what's going to come back to you. So I

1130
00:54:44,960 --> 00:54:46,560
Speaker 2: love that, that's the message.

1131
00:54:47,320 --> 00:54:49,319
Speaker 1: Yeah, so that was just really great. Honestly, I just

1132
00:54:49,320 --> 00:54:51,279
Speaker 1: felt really good about that, and I just I was

1133
00:54:51,320 --> 00:54:54,239
Speaker 1: like I had to share because I wasn't expecting that,

1134
00:54:54,719 --> 00:54:59,000
Speaker 1: and yeah, just now I'm all excited. And so one

1135
00:54:59,000 --> 00:55:01,480
Speaker 1: of the things I've learned after ten years of business

1136
00:55:01,640 --> 00:55:05,759
Speaker 1: is typically when an opportunity comes up like this, like

1137
00:55:05,840 --> 00:55:11,799
Speaker 1: something big, it's usually it's usually the initial like the

1138
00:55:11,840 --> 00:55:14,200
Speaker 1: initial thing is not the thing, it's like the thing

1139
00:55:14,239 --> 00:55:16,520
Speaker 1: before the thing. That's what I call it, meaning like

1140
00:55:16,640 --> 00:55:19,600
Speaker 1: it's there to say get ready. So it might take

1141
00:55:20,440 --> 00:55:24,360
Speaker 1: a year before this relationship develops into something, or maybe

1142
00:55:24,520 --> 00:55:26,920
Speaker 1: it'll be another network. I don't know, but I do

1143
00:55:27,040 --> 00:55:29,719
Speaker 1: know that rarely when something big comes up, is it

1144
00:55:29,840 --> 00:55:34,280
Speaker 1: the initial thing that it's usually the thing to say, Hey, Tiffany,

1145
00:55:34,719 --> 00:55:38,400
Speaker 1: this thing is coming. This is a reminder get ready now.

1146
00:55:38,480 --> 00:55:40,759
Speaker 1: So it's just like you know, and that's how I've

1147
00:55:40,840 --> 00:55:44,200
Speaker 1: learned sometimes to manage disappointments, because sometimes you know something

1148
00:55:44,239 --> 00:55:46,160
Speaker 1: will happen and it's like, oh, it didn't happen, and

1149
00:55:46,200 --> 00:55:49,640
Speaker 1: that's not true. That thing was there to prepare me

1150
00:55:49,760 --> 00:55:52,120
Speaker 1: for what was coming forth in the future. And so

1151
00:55:52,360 --> 00:55:54,759
Speaker 1: just keeping that in mind too that oftentimes, you know,

1152
00:55:54,800 --> 00:55:57,480
Speaker 1: it's easy to get disappointed when you don't get what

1153
00:55:57,520 --> 00:55:59,719
Speaker 1: you want in your first go round, not realizing that

1154
00:55:59,800 --> 00:56:02,239
Speaker 1: it wasn't there for that. It was merely just like

1155
00:56:02,280 --> 00:56:06,000
Speaker 1: a like a flare gun being flared up to say, hey, here,

1156
00:56:06,040 --> 00:56:08,520
Speaker 1: I am the thing that you're that you're wishing and

1157
00:56:08,560 --> 00:56:11,400
Speaker 1: wanting and working toward. It's going to happen, but I

1158
00:56:11,440 --> 00:56:13,640
Speaker 1: need you to like get in alignment.

1159
00:56:13,239 --> 00:56:21,359
Speaker 2: Now, fingers crossed. I don't care having a boy. He's

1160
00:56:21,360 --> 00:56:23,160
Speaker 2: gonna be a Molly Moore fan. I want the T shirt,

1161
00:56:23,480 --> 00:56:26,279
Speaker 2: I want the backpack, the stuffed animal, all that.

1162
00:56:27,400 --> 00:56:29,080
Speaker 1: I can't wait. Did I did I ever show I

1163
00:56:29,080 --> 00:56:30,640
Speaker 1: showed you Molly Moore, but I haven't showed you the cover.

1164
00:56:30,640 --> 00:56:31,880
Speaker 1: I'm gonna say, I'm gonna sound.

1165
00:56:32,440 --> 00:56:35,160
Speaker 2: A little fro. Yeah, it's so cute.

1166
00:56:36,040 --> 00:56:38,920
Speaker 1: Honestly, I'm just I just can't wait. You know, you

1167
00:56:39,000 --> 00:56:41,360
Speaker 1: just know, I just feel it in my bones that

1168
00:56:41,520 --> 00:56:44,480
Speaker 1: like I just I want, like, you know, not just

1169
00:56:44,640 --> 00:56:46,600
Speaker 1: it's not just for little brown girls. It's really just

1170
00:56:46,640 --> 00:56:50,080
Speaker 1: for kids in general to start laying the foundation and

1171
00:56:50,120 --> 00:56:52,120
Speaker 1: for parents to have the tools and resources. Like I

1172
00:56:52,160 --> 00:56:56,080
Speaker 1: literally was just adding, like like literally, there's a section

1173
00:56:56,440 --> 00:56:59,279
Speaker 1: and it says, hey, adult and I break down based

1174
00:56:59,320 --> 00:57:02,360
Speaker 1: upon the core Career in standards. These are the nationwide

1175
00:57:02,400 --> 00:57:06,120
Speaker 1: standards that have been created by educators to say, hey,

1176
00:57:06,400 --> 00:57:09,440
Speaker 1: every school in the nation has to adhere to these

1177
00:57:09,480 --> 00:57:12,080
Speaker 1: standards that by first grade kids should know this, by

1178
00:57:12,120 --> 00:57:15,319
Speaker 1: kindergarten kidshould know this. So I aligned it with those

1179
00:57:15,360 --> 00:57:17,959
Speaker 1: standards so you and I tell you that this book

1180
00:57:18,000 --> 00:57:21,120
Speaker 1: is going to teach rhyming and counting and all these

1181
00:57:21,200 --> 00:57:23,520
Speaker 1: other wonderful things. And then I say, here are some

1182
00:57:23,720 --> 00:57:26,439
Speaker 1: questions to ask your child, and here's how to turn

1183
00:57:26,480 --> 00:57:29,560
Speaker 1: that question into a writing activity, a reading activity. A

1184
00:57:29,600 --> 00:57:33,439
Speaker 1: speaking activity, so I really take like teacher Tiffany really

1185
00:57:33,480 --> 00:57:35,800
Speaker 1: shines at the back of the book, so you it's

1186
00:57:35,800 --> 00:57:37,560
Speaker 1: not just a book for you. This is a tool

1187
00:57:37,640 --> 00:57:40,160
Speaker 1: to really stretch and grow your child. So I'm really

1188
00:57:40,160 --> 00:57:41,400
Speaker 1: excited about that component.

1189
00:57:42,920 --> 00:57:45,760
Speaker 2: Can't wait. When's the pub date? Do you have a

1190
00:57:46,040 --> 00:57:46,720
Speaker 2: Is it next year?

1191
00:57:47,640 --> 00:57:52,280
Speaker 1: Yes, it's It's tentatively January twenty twenty, so we should

1192
00:57:52,320 --> 00:57:54,000
Speaker 1: be going to print in like a couple of weeks.

1193
00:57:54,040 --> 00:57:56,040
Speaker 1: So if we go to print and it looks good,

1194
00:57:56,120 --> 00:57:58,720
Speaker 1: then we could just print them, which I'm excited about.

1195
00:57:59,240 --> 00:58:02,520
Speaker 1: I chose I know, I specifically chose a is a

1196
00:58:02,560 --> 00:58:07,760
Speaker 1: woman owned a woman owned, yes, women owned publishing company

1197
00:58:07,880 --> 00:58:10,880
Speaker 1: because someone asked me in my DMS it's Wyse Inc.

1198
00:58:11,040 --> 00:58:13,480
Speaker 1: Shout out to Dara. What I love about Why's Inc.

1199
00:58:13,600 --> 00:58:15,760
Speaker 1: Is that it's the perfect hybrid of what I wanted

1200
00:58:16,160 --> 00:58:19,400
Speaker 1: traditional publishing they typically own your stuff, but then self

1201
00:58:19,440 --> 00:58:21,600
Speaker 1: publishing me, you have to do everything I wanted a

1202
00:58:21,640 --> 00:58:24,800
Speaker 1: publishing company that was somewhere in the between. And Lovey

1203
00:58:24,920 --> 00:58:27,120
Speaker 1: my friend love shout out to love Though. For Muna

1204
00:58:27,160 --> 00:58:29,640
Speaker 1: Luci Bridel magazine cover, she looks amazing. Go to her,

1205
00:58:29,960 --> 00:58:32,360
Speaker 1: go to her insta anyway. So she's the one who

1206
00:58:32,360 --> 00:58:34,400
Speaker 1: told me about whys Inc. And it's a hybrid and

1207
00:58:34,440 --> 00:58:36,840
Speaker 1: that I get ownership or I have to pay for

1208
00:58:36,880 --> 00:58:39,480
Speaker 1: all my things, but then they help me with distribution

1209
00:58:39,800 --> 00:58:42,120
Speaker 1: and and help me with like layout and all these

1210
00:58:42,160 --> 00:58:44,440
Speaker 1: other things that a traditional publisher would, but I just

1211
00:58:44,440 --> 00:58:46,760
Speaker 1: pay out a card. So it's the perfect for what

1212
00:58:46,800 --> 00:58:49,640
Speaker 1: I'm looking for for this book. It's the perfect blend

1213
00:58:49,760 --> 00:58:54,280
Speaker 1: of personal responsibility but professional assistant. So if you're looking

1214
00:58:54,320 --> 00:58:57,080
Speaker 1: for that kind of mix, then Wyse Inc. Is awesome.

1215
00:58:59,160 --> 00:59:06,720
Speaker 2: So excited I know, all right, Well that is the show.

1216
00:59:06,760 --> 00:59:06,960
Speaker 1: Guy.

1217
00:59:07,120 --> 00:59:09,120
Speaker 2: Thank you for listening. And to those of you who

1218
00:59:09,200 --> 00:59:11,320
Speaker 2: pointed out there was a glitch in an episode or

1219
00:59:11,320 --> 00:59:15,800
Speaker 2: two ago. You guys missed some of Tiffany's rant against

1220
00:59:15,800 --> 00:59:18,919
Speaker 2: Snoop Dogg. I'm gonna fix that right now, said go back.

1221
00:59:18,960 --> 00:59:21,360
Speaker 2: I think it's episode one ninety three. Go back and

1222
00:59:21,400 --> 00:59:24,520
Speaker 2: hear her read Snoop Dogg. I'm so sorry because it

1223
00:59:24,640 --> 00:59:28,120
Speaker 2: was well worth to listen. I will fix that right away.

1224
00:59:29,040 --> 00:59:29,560
Speaker 2: I love that

1225
00:59:31,720 --> 00:59:32,880
Speaker 1: I read against Snoop Doog.