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Speaker 1: M h. Welcome to the Therapy for Black Girls Podcast,

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Speaker 1: a weekly conversation about mental health, personal development, and all

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Speaker 1: the small decisions we can make to become the best

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Speaker 1: possible versions of ourselves. I'm your host, Dr Joy hard

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Speaker 1: and Bradford, a licensed psychologist in Atlanta, Georgia. For more

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Speaker 1: information or to find a therapist in your area, visit

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Speaker 1: our website at Therapy for Black Girls dot com. While

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Speaker 1: I hope you love listening to and learning from the podcast,

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Speaker 1: it is not meant to be a substitute for a

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Speaker 1: relationship with a licensed mental health professional. Hey, y'all, thanks

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Speaker 1: so much for joining me for session one oh eight

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Speaker 1: of the airp for Black Girls podcast. Today we're gonna

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Speaker 1: be chatting about how you can find your people, your tribe,

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Speaker 1: the people who have your back and you have theirs.

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Speaker 1: But first, let's show some love to our sponsors. In

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Speaker 1: recent months, you've probably seen lots of talk about people

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Speaker 1: using coloring books and apps as a part of their

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Speaker 1: self care routines. Coloring can be really helpful in managing anxiety,

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Speaker 1: helping you to be more in touch with the present moment,

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Speaker 1: and engaging your sense of playfulness that we often lose

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Speaker 1: when we grow up. So I'm super excited to tell

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Speaker 1: you about Color Noir in O I R, which is

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Speaker 1: the first and only coloring book app celebrating black women

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Speaker 1: and culture. Color Noir was created by husband and wife

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Speaker 1: team Mayo Ocome and Nakala Matthew's Okomey, who have combined

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Speaker 1: their talents to create a high quality app experience using

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Speaker 1: coloring to celebrate black girl magic in all of its glory.

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Speaker 1: It's free to download and to get it, all you

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Speaker 1: have to do is open up your iOS app store,

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Speaker 1: search for Color Noir that's in O I R and

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Speaker 1: enjoy and make sure you hit subscribe in the app

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Speaker 1: so you can get all of the amazing images, updates

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Speaker 1: and premium content dropping each and every month. Again, it's

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Speaker 1: available in the iOS app Store, It'll be coming to

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Speaker 1: Android soon and the name of the app is Color

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Speaker 1: Noir in O I R. Support for today's episode also

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Speaker 1: I definitely recommend you try them. You can find the

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Speaker 1: Use our exclusive promo code five five five five five

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Speaker 1: ten p off of your purchase. Now let's get back

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Speaker 1: to our episode. So, if you follow me on Instagram

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Speaker 1: or if you're signed up for our Sunday newsletter. Then

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Speaker 1: you know, I was in d C at the mom

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Speaker 1: Ference this past weekend. So the Momference is the first

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Speaker 1: of its kind, incredible experience that brings together black and

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Speaker 1: brown mamas from across the country for a day of

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Speaker 1: learning and connecting. In my presentation, I talked about how

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Speaker 1: moms can cultivate calm in the midst of chaos, and

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Speaker 1: one of the things that I offered was finding your

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Speaker 1: Mama tribe. This sentiment was echoed by lots of other

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Speaker 1: speakers this weekend as well. It's just the idea that

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Speaker 1: none of us can do this parenting thing alone. But

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Speaker 1: it also got me thinking on a larger scale, even

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Speaker 1: beyond parenting, that none of us can do this life

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Speaker 1: thing alone, and we really need our people I tribe

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Speaker 1: to have our back. One of the main things that

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Speaker 1: I hear about this is where do I find these people?

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Speaker 1: So that's what I wanted us to chat about today.

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Speaker 1: Where can you begin to find your people? So one

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Speaker 1: of the first places that I'd suggest for finding your

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Speaker 1: people is at conferences and gatherings, kind of like the conference.

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Speaker 1: So I know some of twenty one is coming up

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Speaker 1: here in Atlanta next month. My Leytel just had a retreat.

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Speaker 1: Christina Rice has several retreats every year. Sarah Jake's Robberts

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Speaker 1: has a woman evolved every year. There are conferences associated

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Speaker 1: with most professional organizations that you can attend. There are

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Speaker 1: plenty of gatherings of like minded people for almost anything

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Speaker 1: that you can think of. Now. I do understand that

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Speaker 1: these kinds of things can be pricey, but if you

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Speaker 1: can swing it, it can be an investment that pays

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Speaker 1: off in lots of different ways. I think that one

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Speaker 1: of the ways you can make the most of an

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Speaker 1: event like this is to one do your research ahead

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Speaker 1: of time and make sure that the kinds of people

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Speaker 1: who have attended in the past are the kinds of

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Speaker 1: people you'd want to connect with. You can do this

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Speaker 1: pretty easily by searching the hashtags for the events to

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Speaker 1: see what kinds of things people share, and then you

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Speaker 1: can dig a little deeper to see what kinds of

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Speaker 1: things these people are interested in, either based on what

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Speaker 1: they share on social media, or you can even send

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Speaker 1: them a message and ask if you can speak with

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Speaker 1: them briefly or shoot them a couple of questions by

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Speaker 1: d M to ask about their experiences at x y

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Speaker 1: Z event. Many people will be really happy to share

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Speaker 1: their opinions about something, especially if it's an event that

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Speaker 1: they really enjoyed. I think it's also really important to

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Speaker 1: be strategic about how you go into an experience if possible,

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Speaker 1: is there a way that you can connect with other

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Speaker 1: people who will be attending beforehand. Again, when people are

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Speaker 1: excited about an event, they usually shared on social media,

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Speaker 1: So try to connect with others ahead of time so

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Speaker 1: that you can start to build a relationship before you

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Speaker 1: even leave your city. And this might be incredibly important.

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Speaker 1: It's especially if you're somebody who's introverted or a little

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Speaker 1: more on the shy side. Another thing that might help

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Speaker 1: is to try to get to the gathering site a

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Speaker 1: day before it all starts, so that you have some

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Speaker 1: time to meet other people who have arrived early and

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Speaker 1: maybe a little bit more of a laidback atmosphere. The

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Speaker 1: second place that I think can be great for finding

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Speaker 1: your people is in virtual groups, so places like Facebook

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Speaker 1: groups for particular topics. You know, we have the Thrive

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Speaker 1: Tribe that is our Facebook group for this community. Community

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Speaker 1: is created using Twitter hashtags and even the comments section

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Speaker 1: of certain outlets in social media pages have built a

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Speaker 1: sense of community that allows you to get to know

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Speaker 1: the other commenters. Again, much of this work will require

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Speaker 1: you to do some leg work on your part, but

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Speaker 1: you can build incredibly satisfying and supportive relationships completely virtually.

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Speaker 1: One speaker that I met this weekend share that she

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Speaker 1: had connected with another sister on G four years ago

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Speaker 1: and they just met at the month for this past

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Speaker 1: weekend for the first time, so it's definitely possible. I've

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Speaker 1: also found that it's pretty easy to meet other like

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Speaker 1: minded people by participating in Twitter chats. So Black Girl

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Speaker 1: and Home has a Twitter chat called b G I

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Speaker 1: O Mindful and I just participated in that one a

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Speaker 1: few weeks ago and have continued to talk with some

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Speaker 1: of those participants. Creative Smart Girl has great chats from

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Speaker 1: time to time, and there's also a thriving community of

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Speaker 1: black women in academia under the site assisted hashtag, and

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Speaker 1: all of these will be included the show notes so

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Speaker 1: that you can go and find them. So if you

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Speaker 1: do some research and ask some questions, online can be

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Speaker 1: a really amazing opportunity for you to find your people.

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Speaker 1: And then the third and final place that I think

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Speaker 1: can be great for finding your people is by looking

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Speaker 1: a little more closely in your everyday life. Sometimes there

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Speaker 1: are people in our lives who could really become our

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Speaker 1: people with a little bit of effort on our parts.

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Speaker 1: So the sister that you exchanged pleasantries with at the

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Speaker 1: end of yoga class, or the person in your calculus

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Speaker 1: class who explains to you what happened when you miss

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Speaker 1: something the professor said, or the sister who works on

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Speaker 1: the sixth floor that you run into every now and then,

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Speaker 1: how might you deepen some of these relationships to see

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Speaker 1: if this might be someone who you really enjoy. You

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Speaker 1: remember how in grade school we would just say stuff like, oh,

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Speaker 1: she's gonna be my best friend. Well you might not

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Speaker 1: say that now as an adult. But would it hurt

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Speaker 1: to catch the sister after yoga and say, Hey, I'm

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Speaker 1: new to the area and I would love to be

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Speaker 1: able to meet some new people. Can I treat you

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Speaker 1: to lunch at your favorite restaurants so I can get

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Speaker 1: to know the city a little more. Now, of course,

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Speaker 1: this may be a little uncomfortable at first, but the

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Speaker 1: worst that she can say is no, and no doesn't

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Speaker 1: necessarily mean that you stop. It just means that maybe

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Speaker 1: you find somebody else to try with and that you

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Speaker 1: don't stop until you find your people. So I'm really

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Speaker 1: curious to know, and I know lots of other listeners

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Speaker 1: will be curious as well. Tell us where in real

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Speaker 1: life or online you've met your people, What Facebook groups,

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Speaker 1: I G accounts, etcetera. Would you suggest for other people

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Speaker 1: who are looking to build their tribe? Share that with

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Speaker 1: us on social media using the hashtag tb G in

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Speaker 1: session so that we can help each other connect. Again,

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Speaker 1: be sure to show some love and support for our

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Speaker 1: sponsors for this episode. Color Noir is the first and

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Speaker 1: only coloring book app celebrating black women in culture. It's

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Speaker 1: free to download and to get it, all you have

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Speaker 1: to do is open up your iOS app store, search

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Speaker 1: for Color Noir that's in O, I, R, and enjoy.

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Speaker 1: Be sure to hit subscribe in the app so that

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00:10:58,559 --> 00:11:01,760
Speaker 1: you can get all of the amazing images, updates and

187
00:11:01,840 --> 00:11:06,120
Speaker 1: premium content dropping each and every month. And be sure

188
00:11:06,160 --> 00:11:09,960
Speaker 1: to check out Naturalisious. It's the world's first vegan, high

189
00:11:09,960 --> 00:11:13,600
Speaker 1: performance hair care line that delivers the results of twelve

190
00:11:13,640 --> 00:11:17,200
Speaker 1: products and only three You can find the products and

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00:11:17,240 --> 00:11:20,840
Speaker 1: over twelve hundred Sally stores nationwide, and you can also

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00:11:20,920 --> 00:11:23,960
Speaker 1: get ten percent off your purchase online by going to

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Speaker 1: Sally Beauty dot com and using the promo code five

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Speaker 1: five five five five five at checkout. Remember that if

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Speaker 1: you're searching for a therapist in your area, visit our

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Speaker 1: therapist directory at Therapy for Black Girls dot com slash directory.

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Speaker 1: And if you want to continue this conversation with other

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Speaker 1: sisters who listen to the podcast, which is of course,

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Speaker 1: all we've been talking about, is building your tribe, come

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Speaker 1: on over and join us in our thrive tribe. You

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Speaker 1: can request to join at Therapy for Black Girls dot

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Speaker 1: com slash Tribe and be sure to answer the three

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Speaker 1: questions that are asked to gain entry. Don't forget to

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Speaker 1: shop in our online store at Therapy for Black Girls

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Speaker 1: dot com slash shop, where you can find our guided

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Speaker 1: affirmation track, breakup journal in your Therapy for Black Girls

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Speaker 1: t shirts and mugs. Thank you all so much for

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Speaker 1: joining me again this week. I look forward to continue

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Speaker 1: in this conversation with you all real soon. Take good care,