1
00:00:01,040 --> 00:00:03,560
Speaker 1: So what are your love languages? You took the quiz?

2
00:00:03,800 --> 00:00:06,200
Speaker 2: Yes, I mean this is this is receiving gifts.

3
00:00:06,680 --> 00:00:10,240
Speaker 3: I was gonna say this.

4
00:00:12,000 --> 00:00:22,119
Speaker 2: And more better, motter more, a little more better.

5
00:00:22,480 --> 00:00:31,840
Speaker 4: More, Welcome to more better podcast, or stop pretending to

6
00:00:31,840 --> 00:00:32,720
Speaker 4: have it all together?

7
00:00:34,479 --> 00:00:37,680
Speaker 1: What we just started recording.

8
00:00:38,760 --> 00:00:43,159
Speaker 3: Go to the bathroom. Jesus sorry, guys, keep.

9
00:00:43,000 --> 00:00:44,520
Speaker 1: Going, keep going. This is gold.

10
00:00:45,320 --> 00:00:47,600
Speaker 5: Embrace the journey of becoming a little more.

11
00:00:48,120 --> 00:00:52,040
Speaker 3: Better every day, right, yeah, yeah, or at least fucking

12
00:00:52,200 --> 00:00:52,760
Speaker 3: trying to.

13
00:00:53,400 --> 00:00:53,920
Speaker 1: That's right.

14
00:00:54,040 --> 00:00:55,920
Speaker 6: That's mostaper moro and.

15
00:00:55,880 --> 00:00:57,240
Speaker 1: That's Stephanie Beatrice.

16
00:00:57,720 --> 00:00:58,800
Speaker 6: Welcome back to the pod.

17
00:00:58,840 --> 00:00:59,120
Speaker 2: Guys.

18
00:00:59,120 --> 00:01:00,920
Speaker 1: We have We're not going to pretend like we don't

19
00:01:01,000 --> 00:01:01,880
Speaker 1: have guests today.

20
00:01:02,040 --> 00:01:07,600
Speaker 5: We have our significant others, our partners in life. My husband,

21
00:01:07,600 --> 00:01:12,240
Speaker 5: Brad is here. Melissa's husband is also here taking a piss.

22
00:01:12,720 --> 00:01:15,080
Speaker 5: He just went to the bathroom right as we started,

23
00:01:15,280 --> 00:01:19,440
Speaker 5: even though he's had seventeen minutes to do it. So

24
00:01:19,680 --> 00:01:23,520
Speaker 5: as you can see, today here I am today there

25
00:01:23,400 --> 00:01:25,680
Speaker 5: a guess because we're well we'll get into that in

26
00:01:25,680 --> 00:01:27,240
Speaker 5: a minute. What have you done lately? That's a little

27
00:01:27,240 --> 00:01:28,320
Speaker 5: more better? Melissa?

28
00:01:28,400 --> 00:01:31,440
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, what have I done lately? That's more better?

29
00:01:31,800 --> 00:01:40,000
Speaker 3: This week, I've been more consistent with workouts and sleep,

30
00:01:41,080 --> 00:01:45,240
Speaker 3: like trying to go to bed at the time that

31
00:01:45,319 --> 00:01:50,640
Speaker 3: I should go to bed. And it's two little things,

32
00:01:51,000 --> 00:01:55,280
Speaker 3: but I overall do feel better. It's like another reminder

33
00:01:55,360 --> 00:01:58,000
Speaker 3: sometimes you're just like, just focus on a couple of things.

34
00:01:58,560 --> 00:02:02,960
Speaker 3: But yeah, I've been like trying not to try not

35
00:02:03,040 --> 00:02:06,640
Speaker 3: to stay up late, like watching stuff or on my phone,

36
00:02:06,760 --> 00:02:07,800
Speaker 3: and it's so hard.

37
00:02:07,800 --> 00:02:11,240
Speaker 5: But it like, sleep is such a big Have we

38
00:02:11,320 --> 00:02:14,440
Speaker 5: done an episode about sleep, like specifically about sleep, because.

39
00:02:14,240 --> 00:02:16,960
Speaker 1: It's so no step episode.

40
00:02:17,480 --> 00:02:18,800
Speaker 6: Yeah, because you don't learn.

41
00:02:19,040 --> 00:02:21,920
Speaker 5: I mean like you hear like sleep whatever, and then

42
00:02:21,960 --> 00:02:24,320
Speaker 5: you're in your twenties and you're like, I'm fine, this

43
00:02:24,400 --> 00:02:27,000
Speaker 5: is great, and then your thirties you're like, I'll just

44
00:02:27,040 --> 00:02:28,880
Speaker 5: have some extra coffee. And then when you hear forties,

45
00:02:28,919 --> 00:02:33,120
Speaker 5: you're like, oh no, I'm so tired all the time.

46
00:02:33,880 --> 00:02:36,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, And I'm like, since I don't know if this

47
00:02:36,000 --> 00:02:38,320
Speaker 3: has happened to you, but since having kids, I've become

48
00:02:38,480 --> 00:02:39,720
Speaker 3: the lightest sleeper.

49
00:02:40,680 --> 00:02:42,760
Speaker 1: Any little noise will wake me up.

50
00:02:43,480 --> 00:02:45,360
Speaker 5: Well, because they sometimes they need you in the middle

51
00:02:45,400 --> 00:02:45,760
Speaker 5: of the night.

52
00:02:45,880 --> 00:02:48,600
Speaker 3: So yeah, it's like your your brain gets trained to

53
00:02:48,680 --> 00:02:51,239
Speaker 3: wake up to like any sort of kid noises. Yes,

54
00:02:51,280 --> 00:02:54,040
Speaker 3: I will hear Enzo talks in his sleep, and I'll

55
00:02:54,080 --> 00:02:57,079
Speaker 3: hear him say something from the other room.

56
00:02:58,240 --> 00:03:01,080
Speaker 5: The other night, I woke Brad up. I like woke,

57
00:03:01,480 --> 00:03:03,720
Speaker 5: he says, I shook him awake. I was just like hey.

58
00:03:04,639 --> 00:03:07,880
Speaker 1: I was like, oh you you forgot to lock Rose's door.

59
00:03:07,919 --> 00:03:08,760
Speaker 1: And he was like what.

60
00:03:09,160 --> 00:03:12,360
Speaker 5: Because we have these like little like child proof things

61
00:03:12,360 --> 00:03:13,800
Speaker 5: on the outside of her door so she if she

62
00:03:13,840 --> 00:03:16,320
Speaker 5: wakes up early, she can't get into the knives or whatever.

63
00:03:16,440 --> 00:03:16,600
Speaker 5: You know.

64
00:03:17,280 --> 00:03:19,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, So I was like, you forgot to lock Ro's door.

65
00:03:19,240 --> 00:03:23,120
Speaker 1: He was like, what are you talking about. She's not awake.

66
00:03:24,000 --> 00:03:24,640
Speaker 1: Why are you talking.

67
00:03:24,720 --> 00:03:27,160
Speaker 5: I was like, oh, sorry, and we went back to sleep,

68
00:03:27,200 --> 00:03:29,880
Speaker 5: and then what half an hour later, she comes Waltzon

69
00:03:29,960 --> 00:03:33,079
Speaker 5: in our bedroom because you forgot to lock her door.

70
00:03:33,800 --> 00:03:34,239
Speaker 4: Mm hmm.

71
00:03:36,200 --> 00:03:38,600
Speaker 1: So I knew it in my sleep. Anyway, you knew

72
00:03:38,600 --> 00:03:40,720
Speaker 1: it in your sleep. What about you? What have you

73
00:03:40,760 --> 00:03:41,960
Speaker 1: done lately? That's more better.

74
00:03:42,480 --> 00:03:46,240
Speaker 5: I went horseback riding again. I've been taking the lesson everything.

75
00:03:48,480 --> 00:03:50,840
Speaker 5: It's been really cool today. Sorry, I can't get my

76
00:03:50,880 --> 00:03:52,040
Speaker 5: earring back in my ear.

77
00:03:52,640 --> 00:03:54,520
Speaker 3: I was about to ask you, what's going on with

78
00:03:54,520 --> 00:03:57,080
Speaker 3: with your earring and what's happening? But I was like,

79
00:03:57,240 --> 00:03:59,400
Speaker 3: let me, she's on a journey with her or the

80
00:03:59,480 --> 00:04:00,280
Speaker 3: other the.

81
00:04:00,280 --> 00:04:04,040
Speaker 5: Other more better that I got these flat back earrings

82
00:04:04,080 --> 00:04:07,920
Speaker 5: for my second earring hole that I got pierced, you know,

83
00:04:07,960 --> 00:04:11,640
Speaker 5: when I was sixteen at the Renaissance Festival or wherever

84
00:04:11,680 --> 00:04:14,880
Speaker 5: I was, and I haven't, I don't. I don't ever

85
00:04:14,920 --> 00:04:17,039
Speaker 5: have earrings in them. This is not an ad. I

86
00:04:17,040 --> 00:04:20,120
Speaker 5: don't ever have earrings in them because I never can

87
00:04:20,240 --> 00:04:23,320
Speaker 5: sleep on the fucking earrings. So I got these things

88
00:04:23,360 --> 00:04:25,240
Speaker 5: called flat back earrings, and I don't think they had

89
00:04:25,240 --> 00:04:26,640
Speaker 5: when we were young.

90
00:04:26,760 --> 00:04:29,200
Speaker 3: But they're like the newer it's a newer thing. Are

91
00:04:29,200 --> 00:04:32,239
Speaker 3: they comfortable? But they're hard read in Obviously it looks.

92
00:04:32,080 --> 00:04:34,960
Speaker 5: Like like I can I don't feel them at all,

93
00:04:34,960 --> 00:04:38,120
Speaker 5: but like I just pulled it out and yeah, slightly

94
00:04:38,480 --> 00:04:39,440
Speaker 5: hard to get back in.

95
00:04:39,760 --> 00:04:41,960
Speaker 1: Anyway. Brad's going to take over while I just get

96
00:04:42,040 --> 00:04:42,680
Speaker 1: this back in.

97
00:04:44,640 --> 00:04:45,720
Speaker 2: To my YouTube.

98
00:04:45,360 --> 00:04:52,040
Speaker 7: Channel, Hey Brad, you do more better today?

99
00:04:53,360 --> 00:04:57,320
Speaker 2: UH had some Ado toasts, not.

100
00:04:57,200 --> 00:04:59,159
Speaker 1: Them trying to take over the podcast.

101
00:05:01,320 --> 00:05:04,640
Speaker 2: I use a little more better. Lemon, Malden Salt. That

102
00:05:04,800 --> 00:05:08,960
Speaker 2: was incredible, Lemon.

103
00:05:10,520 --> 00:05:11,520
Speaker 1: What was the second part?

104
00:05:11,920 --> 00:05:15,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like a it's a lemon salt. It's Malden salt.

105
00:05:15,480 --> 00:05:20,039
Speaker 2: So it's like big flaky salt with lemon zest flavor

106
00:05:20,400 --> 00:05:24,760
Speaker 2: in it. I'll send you a picture. I'll send you

107
00:05:24,800 --> 00:05:25,800
Speaker 2: a picture of it. It's great.

108
00:05:25,920 --> 00:05:26,240
Speaker 1: Okay.

109
00:05:26,920 --> 00:05:29,320
Speaker 3: Yeah, the olive oil you guys got us is really good.

110
00:05:29,320 --> 00:05:30,400
Speaker 3: By the way, Thank you again.

111
00:05:31,160 --> 00:05:33,760
Speaker 1: Welcome guys.

112
00:05:33,800 --> 00:05:39,200
Speaker 5: Today we're going to talk about what are we talking about?

113
00:05:42,440 --> 00:05:43,520
Speaker 6: More better.

114
00:05:45,040 --> 00:05:48,880
Speaker 3: We're talking about love languages, but more broadly, I think

115
00:05:48,920 --> 00:05:52,560
Speaker 3: we're just talking about being in a relationship for a

116
00:05:52,600 --> 00:05:56,840
Speaker 3: hell a long time and how to maybe be more

117
00:05:56,920 --> 00:06:00,960
Speaker 3: better at it because we is you some of that.

118
00:06:02,160 --> 00:06:06,880
Speaker 5: Yeah, we'll see what happens. This is mostly a safe space.

119
00:06:07,400 --> 00:06:09,760
Speaker 5: You can be honest to a point. If you need

120
00:06:09,800 --> 00:06:11,839
Speaker 5: a lifeline, just look at your spouse.

121
00:06:12,000 --> 00:06:13,799
Speaker 1: Obviously, at our wedding.

122
00:06:15,839 --> 00:06:18,719
Speaker 5: At our wedding, at one point during during the not

123
00:06:18,839 --> 00:06:21,039
Speaker 5: our vows, because our vowels were private, but during the

124
00:06:22,320 --> 00:06:25,360
Speaker 5: whatever the public the public. Yeah, the part where they

125
00:06:25,360 --> 00:06:28,080
Speaker 5: were talking. I look over a brat and he's like

126
00:06:28,160 --> 00:06:29,880
Speaker 5: kind of going from one foot to the other, and

127
00:06:29,920 --> 00:06:32,520
Speaker 5: I could see he's like gone very pale and sweaty,

128
00:06:32,839 --> 00:06:34,760
Speaker 5: and I was like, oh, he's gonna faint.

129
00:06:37,560 --> 00:06:39,279
Speaker 1: And I was like, look at me, look at me,

130
00:06:39,720 --> 00:06:41,040
Speaker 1: like like you do with the baby.

131
00:06:41,200 --> 00:06:47,440
Speaker 2: I snapped out. I snapped out of it. I just like, well,

132
00:06:47,520 --> 00:06:48,120
Speaker 2: here I am.

133
00:06:48,080 --> 00:06:49,880
Speaker 5: Here I am when all these people are looking at us.

134
00:06:49,960 --> 00:06:53,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, it was fine. So if that happens today, we'll

135
00:06:53,480 --> 00:06:54,000
Speaker 1: just cut.

136
00:06:53,839 --> 00:06:55,760
Speaker 5: Around it, around it.

137
00:06:56,320 --> 00:06:57,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, the beauty of editing.

138
00:06:57,839 --> 00:07:01,240
Speaker 5: We wanted to start this because everybody knows about love languages,

139
00:07:01,279 --> 00:07:02,560
Speaker 5: and if you don't, you're going to get a little

140
00:07:02,560 --> 00:07:03,839
Speaker 5: crash course in them today.

141
00:07:03,839 --> 00:07:05,560
Speaker 1: But we want to start this by saying.

142
00:07:06,360 --> 00:07:08,560
Speaker 6: Love languages and we'll talk about what they are.

143
00:07:08,680 --> 00:07:12,480
Speaker 5: But their origins are This guy named doctor Gary Chapman.

144
00:07:12,560 --> 00:07:16,920
Speaker 1: He was a Southern Baptist pastor. SOO starting right there.

145
00:07:18,160 --> 00:07:20,600
Speaker 5: He wrote this book called the Five Love Languages, and

146
00:07:20,720 --> 00:07:24,680
Speaker 5: it's based entirely on anecdotal evidence from his own marriage,

147
00:07:24,680 --> 00:07:28,160
Speaker 5: from counseling at his church. There's no scientific studies here.

148
00:07:28,440 --> 00:07:31,520
Speaker 5: He does have a doctorate in adult education and anthropology,

149
00:07:31,560 --> 00:07:35,760
Speaker 5: but not in psychology. The book is very popular. It's

150
00:07:35,760 --> 00:07:43,360
Speaker 5: sold like a bajillion copies worldwide despite being unscientifically validated.

151
00:07:44,400 --> 00:07:46,000
Speaker 6: Also, like, I'm on their mailing list.

152
00:07:46,080 --> 00:07:46,880
Speaker 1: I like their stuff.

153
00:07:46,880 --> 00:07:47,400
Speaker 2: We've taken.

154
00:07:47,480 --> 00:07:49,920
Speaker 5: There's like a bunch of love language quizzes online, you

155
00:07:49,920 --> 00:07:53,680
Speaker 5: can take. Everybody's taken them. I'm sure we can talk about.

156
00:07:54,120 --> 00:07:57,240
Speaker 3: And it's one of those things that you know, Yes,

157
00:07:57,360 --> 00:08:01,600
Speaker 3: it's not rooted in any like data or scientific studies.

158
00:08:01,720 --> 00:08:05,160
Speaker 3: It's very anecdotal. It's from his own experience with his

159
00:08:05,240 --> 00:08:10,080
Speaker 3: wife and his parishioners. But it's resonated with people and

160
00:08:10,120 --> 00:08:12,000
Speaker 3: it has helped a lot of people, and I think

161
00:08:12,000 --> 00:08:15,000
Speaker 3: it's I think it's a good jumping off point because

162
00:08:15,000 --> 00:08:19,800
Speaker 3: I think it is a good platform to start to just.

163
00:08:21,480 --> 00:08:23,840
Speaker 1: Discuss or discover how.

164
00:08:23,560 --> 00:08:26,440
Speaker 3: You give and receive love and how that might be

165
00:08:26,560 --> 00:08:30,160
Speaker 3: different from your partner and understanding that. So I think

166
00:08:30,160 --> 00:08:32,480
Speaker 3: that's why it's resonated with so many people. But we

167
00:08:32,520 --> 00:08:35,200
Speaker 3: wanted to give the disclaimer that, like, we know, the

168
00:08:35,240 --> 00:08:37,360
Speaker 3: backstory of the book is like a little bit we're

169
00:08:37,679 --> 00:08:40,520
Speaker 3: people that you know, we're aware, we're just using it

170
00:08:41,080 --> 00:08:43,640
Speaker 3: as a starting place to have this conversation.

171
00:08:44,160 --> 00:08:46,720
Speaker 5: Yeah, if you don't know what the love languages are,

172
00:08:48,840 --> 00:08:53,360
Speaker 5: Doctor Chapman identified five ways people express and receive love.

173
00:08:53,480 --> 00:08:58,240
Speaker 5: Number one words of affirmation, so verbal compliments, words of appreciation,

174
00:08:58,600 --> 00:09:01,960
Speaker 5: like you look really great. I love you, Thank you.

175
00:09:02,120 --> 00:09:07,120
Speaker 5: Number two quality time, which is undivided attention and shared

176
00:09:07,160 --> 00:09:10,959
Speaker 5: activities that means no phone and actually being present. Number

177
00:09:10,960 --> 00:09:15,320
Speaker 5: three receiving gifts tangible symbols of love. They don't have

178
00:09:15,360 --> 00:09:18,559
Speaker 5: to be expensive. Could be like something small that you made,

179
00:09:18,720 --> 00:09:21,800
Speaker 5: or like their favorite you know, candy bar, something that

180
00:09:21,840 --> 00:09:26,400
Speaker 5: you pick them up. Number four acts of service helpful

181
00:09:26,600 --> 00:09:31,080
Speaker 5: actions things like doing dishes, making coffee, running errands.

182
00:09:30,640 --> 00:09:31,480
Speaker 1: Doing a laundry.

183
00:09:32,000 --> 00:09:36,480
Speaker 5: And number five is physical touch physical affection like holding hands, hugs,

184
00:09:36,520 --> 00:09:39,880
Speaker 5: having sex, sitting close together on the couch. And like

185
00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:43,800
Speaker 5: Mosta said, the basic ideas that you let people just

186
00:09:43,840 --> 00:09:47,320
Speaker 5: are ever is different, so like some people are is different.

187
00:09:47,880 --> 00:09:50,480
Speaker 5: Focus on certain things and then make them feel loved

188
00:09:50,480 --> 00:09:52,360
Speaker 5: and other people focus on other things. And I think

189
00:09:52,400 --> 00:09:56,079
Speaker 5: sometimes when you get in trouble is where like you

190
00:09:56,120 --> 00:09:58,000
Speaker 5: feel like you're doing a thing that your partner would

191
00:09:58,040 --> 00:10:01,640
Speaker 5: really appreciate and you're not hearing anything back, not even

192
00:10:01,679 --> 00:10:03,920
Speaker 5: to thank you. You're not hearing It's like I'm doing

193
00:10:03,960 --> 00:10:05,600
Speaker 5: all this for you, and it's like I don't care

194
00:10:05,600 --> 00:10:08,199
Speaker 5: about that. I don't care about that. I wish you

195
00:10:08,200 --> 00:10:11,720
Speaker 5: would show me a love in a different way. Right. Yes,

196
00:10:12,360 --> 00:10:15,760
Speaker 5: I think one of the things like that is so

197
00:10:15,840 --> 00:10:19,760
Speaker 5: this is where it gets tricky, right because like Brad,

198
00:10:19,800 --> 00:10:21,920
Speaker 5: for example, does all the laundry in our house, and

199
00:10:21,960 --> 00:10:24,760
Speaker 5: I do appreciate it. I really appreciate.

200
00:10:24,160 --> 00:10:28,760
Speaker 1: It a lot. David does take it's not nice the laundry.

201
00:10:29,440 --> 00:10:33,640
Speaker 5: It's not necessarily something that, like I feel like, is

202
00:10:33,640 --> 00:10:36,000
Speaker 5: an expression of love for me. Yes, it makes the

203
00:10:36,000 --> 00:10:39,800
Speaker 5: house run better. Yes, it takes something off my plate.

204
00:10:40,720 --> 00:10:42,640
Speaker 5: But I have had arguments with him where I'm like.

205
00:10:42,559 --> 00:10:44,280
Speaker 1: I don't want you to do the laundry.

206
00:10:44,400 --> 00:10:46,360
Speaker 5: If you're just gonna leave it in a clean pile

207
00:10:46,440 --> 00:10:48,440
Speaker 5: for me to put away, that doesn't do anything for me,

208
00:10:49,160 --> 00:10:51,120
Speaker 5: Like you please fold it and put it away or

209
00:10:51,200 --> 00:10:53,480
Speaker 5: leave it dirty, and then when I need to do laundry,

210
00:10:53,520 --> 00:10:56,559
Speaker 5: I will do it myself. And he's like, oh, okay, okay,

211
00:10:57,080 --> 00:11:01,280
Speaker 5: I get it. Yeah, and you and you, I mean,

212
00:11:01,440 --> 00:11:03,240
Speaker 5: are the socks folded the way that I want them

213
00:11:03,240 --> 00:11:03,480
Speaker 5: to beat?

214
00:11:03,600 --> 00:11:03,720
Speaker 7: No?

215
00:11:04,240 --> 00:11:05,680
Speaker 6: Are they cleaning in my drawer?

216
00:11:05,720 --> 00:11:07,600
Speaker 1: Absolutely? And that is really nice.

217
00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:11,120
Speaker 5: You're not Marie Condo with I don't like my socks

218
00:11:11,160 --> 00:11:14,400
Speaker 5: balled up, but I'm not gonna make a big deal

219
00:11:14,440 --> 00:11:14,839
Speaker 5: about that.

220
00:11:15,760 --> 00:11:16,000
Speaker 6: Yes.

221
00:11:16,080 --> 00:11:17,360
Speaker 1: On a podcast.

222
00:11:18,280 --> 00:11:23,040
Speaker 3: Yeah, David has the weirdest way of folding my sweatshirts.

223
00:11:23,200 --> 00:11:27,359
Speaker 1: And but I appreciate that he folded them.

224
00:11:27,760 --> 00:11:29,120
Speaker 7: But they don't rink I mean when you when you

225
00:11:29,120 --> 00:11:30,280
Speaker 7: pull them out, they're not wrinkled.

226
00:11:31,320 --> 00:11:34,160
Speaker 3: Bro, it's so weird that I'm saying, Like the hooded sweatshirts,

227
00:11:34,160 --> 00:11:35,760
Speaker 3: it's so weird how you fold them.

228
00:11:35,880 --> 00:11:36,760
Speaker 1: I just reading the.

229
00:11:36,720 --> 00:11:39,600
Speaker 5: Hood like flattened out. Is it like flattened out in

230
00:11:39,640 --> 00:11:40,640
Speaker 5: the back or.

231
00:11:40,520 --> 00:11:41,760
Speaker 6: What it's like.

232
00:11:42,080 --> 00:11:46,000
Speaker 3: It's like in I fold the hood part in with

233
00:11:46,080 --> 00:11:48,520
Speaker 3: the sweatshirt, he leaves it out, and then it's sort

234
00:11:48,559 --> 00:11:51,920
Speaker 3: of like laying on top of it, like.

235
00:11:51,920 --> 00:11:53,280
Speaker 1: Fold it over and laying on top.

236
00:11:53,720 --> 00:11:55,160
Speaker 2: Okay, And I just feel like.

237
00:11:55,080 --> 00:11:57,559
Speaker 1: The whole thing is bulkier, you know, in a space

238
00:11:58,160 --> 00:12:02,800
Speaker 1: A picture of that. I want to know about that. Unreal.

239
00:12:03,440 --> 00:12:05,040
Speaker 7: She's making it sound worse than really.

240
00:12:05,640 --> 00:12:06,720
Speaker 1: It's just fulk ear.

241
00:12:06,760 --> 00:12:08,680
Speaker 3: And I don't have like a lot of space for

242
00:12:08,760 --> 00:12:11,320
Speaker 3: my hooded sweatshirts. Well I don't have, which I also

243
00:12:11,360 --> 00:12:15,079
Speaker 3: probably have too many. Wow, But David actually is very

244
00:12:15,080 --> 00:12:15,720
Speaker 3: good at folding.

245
00:12:15,760 --> 00:12:18,480
Speaker 7: You taught me, Well, I don't really fold my hooded sweatshirts.

246
00:12:18,520 --> 00:12:20,440
Speaker 7: I just hang them up or like that's true.

247
00:12:20,600 --> 00:12:24,280
Speaker 1: So there's ten hooded sweatshirts behind the door. I hang

248
00:12:24,320 --> 00:12:25,079
Speaker 1: out with my sweatshirts.

249
00:12:27,480 --> 00:12:30,439
Speaker 5: Do you know you guys know roughly like what you're

250
00:12:30,559 --> 00:12:32,839
Speaker 5: number one and number two loveling, because like I think

251
00:12:32,880 --> 00:12:36,520
Speaker 5: when you take the quiz online, you get like this

252
00:12:36,600 --> 00:12:38,760
Speaker 5: is your highest one and then this is your secondary one.

253
00:12:38,800 --> 00:12:42,240
Speaker 1: Do you guys know what yours are? I think we do?

254
00:12:42,360 --> 00:12:42,520
Speaker 5: You know?

255
00:12:42,640 --> 00:12:46,040
Speaker 3: I think didn't Kamar give us this book like years

256
00:12:46,040 --> 00:12:50,640
Speaker 3: and years and years ago, like fifteen years ago when

257
00:12:50,640 --> 00:12:52,720
Speaker 3: we were still living in New York, and I remember

258
00:12:52,760 --> 00:12:54,800
Speaker 3: that we I think we and we both read it

259
00:12:54,840 --> 00:12:56,960
Speaker 3: and we did like talk a lot about it. This

260
00:12:57,120 --> 00:13:02,439
Speaker 3: was so long ago, I think, can I guess yours?

261
00:13:03,600 --> 00:13:06,720
Speaker 3: I think yours is I don't know which is one

262
00:13:06,880 --> 00:13:12,560
Speaker 3: or two. I think yours is acts of service and uh,

263
00:13:12,760 --> 00:13:15,160
Speaker 3: I think you give that way and I think you

264
00:13:15,320 --> 00:13:18,160
Speaker 3: like to receive and a physical touch.

265
00:13:19,960 --> 00:13:20,600
Speaker 7: She nailed me.

266
00:13:22,120 --> 00:13:27,640
Speaker 3: That's good before what you think mine are?

267
00:13:28,280 --> 00:13:33,680
Speaker 7: Yeah, yours is the quality time on the yeah, the

268
00:13:33,840 --> 00:13:37,360
Speaker 7: uh you know the uh. The cards. Melissa likes cards.

269
00:13:37,559 --> 00:13:41,240
Speaker 8: So whenever it's a holiday or or her birthday, if

270
00:13:41,240 --> 00:13:44,040
Speaker 8: you just give her a card, she's she's super happy.

271
00:13:44,160 --> 00:13:46,559
Speaker 3: I'll get more upset about the absence of a card

272
00:13:46,640 --> 00:13:48,560
Speaker 3: than the absence of a present.

273
00:13:49,160 --> 00:13:51,160
Speaker 6: What why is it?

274
00:13:51,200 --> 00:13:51,720
Speaker 2: Is it like the.

275
00:13:53,559 --> 00:13:59,280
Speaker 1: Writing inside the card, like yeah, yeah, yeah, you can't

276
00:13:59,320 --> 00:13:59,959
Speaker 1: just sign your name.

277
00:14:00,000 --> 00:14:02,920
Speaker 3: There has to be at least a couple lines of something,

278
00:14:04,720 --> 00:14:07,520
Speaker 3: or the card itself. Sometimes you've been very thoughtful with

279
00:14:07,600 --> 00:14:10,360
Speaker 3: like the card that you've chosen, and the card says it.

280
00:14:10,360 --> 00:14:12,480
Speaker 3: It's like a I think as I grew up, my

281
00:14:12,600 --> 00:14:16,960
Speaker 3: parents are card givers. They're just like really good about it.

282
00:14:17,000 --> 00:14:20,720
Speaker 3: And my dad also would always like write, like even now,

283
00:14:20,720 --> 00:14:23,000
Speaker 3: when the kids get their report cards, my dad sends

284
00:14:23,040 --> 00:14:25,160
Speaker 3: them a card with some money and he writes a

285
00:14:25,240 --> 00:14:28,480
Speaker 3: message like we're so proud of you for working hard

286
00:14:28,520 --> 00:14:31,680
Speaker 3: at school and here's a little something to congratulate all

287
00:14:31,720 --> 00:14:35,520
Speaker 3: your hard work, and like, you know, and I think

288
00:14:35,560 --> 00:14:38,360
Speaker 3: that I think I always those moments always felt like

289
00:14:38,440 --> 00:14:40,440
Speaker 3: special as a kid. I don't know, there's something and

290
00:14:40,440 --> 00:14:44,920
Speaker 3: I think even now it almost feels more meaningful to me. Also,

291
00:14:45,040 --> 00:14:48,320
Speaker 3: my childhood best friend will write a novel in a card.

292
00:14:48,960 --> 00:14:50,920
Speaker 3: She will send a card for a birthday and it

293
00:14:50,960 --> 00:14:55,320
Speaker 3: will be full side of the card and then like

294
00:14:55,360 --> 00:14:58,440
Speaker 3: an arrow, so you can go to the back of

295
00:14:58,480 --> 00:15:03,240
Speaker 3: the card, and I think we always did that for

296
00:15:03,320 --> 00:15:07,200
Speaker 3: each other growing up too so, but especially nowadays with

297
00:15:07,280 --> 00:15:12,360
Speaker 3: like technology and our modern world, there is something to

298
00:15:12,400 --> 00:15:17,120
Speaker 3: me that feels very special about someone looking going to

299
00:15:17,160 --> 00:15:20,520
Speaker 3: the store, looking through cards, picking one that makes them

300
00:15:20,560 --> 00:15:23,280
Speaker 3: think of you, and then just taking a few minutes

301
00:15:23,320 --> 00:15:27,880
Speaker 3: to like write a little note to you. Something about

302
00:15:27,880 --> 00:15:30,280
Speaker 3: that feels very very meaningful to me, more so than

303
00:15:30,360 --> 00:15:33,240
Speaker 3: like a present, to be honest.

304
00:15:33,280 --> 00:15:33,560
Speaker 8: Not me.

305
00:15:36,800 --> 00:15:41,200
Speaker 1: I mean that's very romantic.

306
00:15:41,320 --> 00:15:42,120
Speaker 6: Yes, I would look.

307
00:15:42,240 --> 00:15:46,120
Speaker 1: I let that that I have a card that Brad

308
00:15:46,160 --> 00:15:46,520
Speaker 1: wrote me.

309
00:15:46,640 --> 00:15:48,840
Speaker 5: I mean he's not really like his handwriting's not great,

310
00:15:48,880 --> 00:15:52,560
Speaker 5: So I'm not expecting that he's going to write a novel.

311
00:15:53,600 --> 00:15:56,880
Speaker 5: And I treasure some things like remember when we were

312
00:15:56,920 --> 00:15:59,440
Speaker 5: on the way to our honeymoon and we I'm like,

313
00:15:59,480 --> 00:16:01,480
Speaker 5: I'm I brought journals and I was like, you have

314
00:16:01,560 --> 00:16:04,000
Speaker 5: to write down how you feel, and so like I

315
00:16:04,080 --> 00:16:06,880
Speaker 5: treasure that, but like, I'm not expecting that he's going

316
00:16:06,960 --> 00:16:12,600
Speaker 5: to be like, here's this card that I handwrote you. Now, Jewelry,

317
00:16:13,040 --> 00:16:14,520
Speaker 5: do you know what your love life?

318
00:16:14,520 --> 00:16:16,960
Speaker 1: So? What are your love languages? You took the quiz?

319
00:16:18,040 --> 00:16:22,440
Speaker 2: Yes, I mean this is this is receiving gifts. This

320
00:16:24,920 --> 00:16:29,560
Speaker 2: gifts and then words of affirmation as like, I.

321
00:16:29,520 --> 00:16:32,000
Speaker 1: Think words of affirmation is bigger to me. But they

322
00:16:32,000 --> 00:16:32,920
Speaker 1: have to be the right words.

323
00:16:32,920 --> 00:16:34,920
Speaker 5: They can't be like ooh, your ASK's hot, it's like

324
00:16:35,000 --> 00:16:36,880
Speaker 5: very high.

325
00:16:37,480 --> 00:16:41,119
Speaker 2: You like to receive a gift with the word of affirmation.

326
00:16:42,560 --> 00:16:45,720
Speaker 5: One time, one time, when was it that you came

327
00:16:45,760 --> 00:16:48,200
Speaker 5: and saw the play? Oh my god, he came and

328
00:16:48,200 --> 00:16:50,200
Speaker 5: saw the play in London when I did that play

329
00:16:50,200 --> 00:16:54,640
Speaker 5: in London, And he didn't say anything afterwards, just like congratulations,

330
00:16:54,680 --> 00:16:57,440
Speaker 5: And I was like hm hmm. And then we like

331
00:16:57,520 --> 00:17:00,920
Speaker 5: went out that night or something, and I was livid.

332
00:17:01,280 --> 00:17:03,640
Speaker 5: I was like waiting for him to say something, livid

333
00:17:03,760 --> 00:17:05,240
Speaker 5: and then I you know, then I got into my

334
00:17:05,240 --> 00:17:07,400
Speaker 5: cups and I was like, why at you get any

335
00:17:07,480 --> 00:17:12,360
Speaker 5: complem inside preformance? I was so mad because I felt

336
00:17:12,400 --> 00:17:16,040
Speaker 5: like I'd worked literally want to figure it happened to us?

337
00:17:16,320 --> 00:17:19,520
Speaker 3: We can't once I know, but I'm just saying that

338
00:17:19,680 --> 00:17:20,840
Speaker 3: the same thing happened to us.

339
00:17:20,880 --> 00:17:21,159
Speaker 5: We came.

340
00:17:21,280 --> 00:17:24,480
Speaker 3: You came to a play reading and afterwards he was

341
00:17:24,520 --> 00:17:27,560
Speaker 3: in a conversation with someone when I got outside.

342
00:17:27,080 --> 00:17:29,280
Speaker 1: And it was a very quick like oh, hey, congrats it.

343
00:17:29,480 --> 00:17:32,440
Speaker 1: And then we're walking the cart. I'm like, bitch, are.

344
00:17:32,359 --> 00:17:33,600
Speaker 6: You gonna say anything?

345
00:17:33,960 --> 00:17:39,400
Speaker 1: You my talent? And I was like, I'm standing there

346
00:17:39,440 --> 00:17:40,000
Speaker 1: like a fool.

347
00:17:40,000 --> 00:17:42,040
Speaker 3: I just acted my ass off for an hour and

348
00:17:42,080 --> 00:17:44,399
Speaker 3: a half and you don't got nothing to say.

349
00:17:45,200 --> 00:17:46,840
Speaker 6: It's not their fault. They're very proud of.

350
00:17:46,880 --> 00:17:47,520
Speaker 1: Us, obviously.

351
00:17:47,720 --> 00:17:49,840
Speaker 7: Yeah, people started talking to you.

352
00:17:49,760 --> 00:17:51,879
Speaker 8: You get into conversations, say hi to different people you

353
00:17:51,920 --> 00:17:54,119
Speaker 8: haven't seen, and and then you forget.

354
00:17:54,240 --> 00:17:56,359
Speaker 7: I forgot about it that one time, but I usually

355
00:17:56,359 --> 00:17:57,960
Speaker 7: do right.

356
00:17:58,080 --> 00:17:59,280
Speaker 1: But it happened at one time.

357
00:17:59,600 --> 00:18:01,320
Speaker 6: I don't think he'll ever do that again.

358
00:18:01,600 --> 00:18:02,680
Speaker 2: That will never happen again.

359
00:18:06,160 --> 00:18:09,399
Speaker 5: Okay, So let's take a really quick little like baby

360
00:18:09,480 --> 00:18:14,920
Speaker 5: quiz questions. So these are some questions, and let's let's

361
00:18:14,920 --> 00:18:18,120
Speaker 5: see how we feel. Would you rather would you rather

362
00:18:18,560 --> 00:18:21,000
Speaker 5: receive a heartfelt love letter or have your partner do

363
00:18:21,040 --> 00:18:21,960
Speaker 5: all the laundry for a week.

364
00:18:22,000 --> 00:18:24,879
Speaker 1: I would rather receive the letter in that case, letter

365
00:18:25,160 --> 00:18:26,120
Speaker 1: one letter?

366
00:18:26,280 --> 00:18:28,160
Speaker 7: What would you rather laundry for a week?

367
00:18:31,040 --> 00:18:31,880
Speaker 2: Laundry for a week?

368
00:18:32,040 --> 00:18:34,760
Speaker 6: Wow, Okay, for a week, that's laundry.

369
00:18:35,000 --> 00:18:35,960
Speaker 2: It's a lot of laundry.

370
00:18:36,000 --> 00:18:39,760
Speaker 6: Brad does laundry like four times a day. Okay, would

371
00:18:39,760 --> 00:18:41,600
Speaker 6: you rather, Oh, would you rather.

372
00:18:41,600 --> 00:18:44,199
Speaker 5: Your partners say I'm proud of you or give you

373
00:18:44,240 --> 00:18:46,840
Speaker 5: a surprise gift?

374
00:18:47,680 --> 00:18:48,320
Speaker 6: I think i'd rather.

375
00:18:48,560 --> 00:18:49,520
Speaker 1: Oh, that's a tough one.

376
00:18:52,960 --> 00:18:55,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think I think I'm proud of you for

377
00:18:55,960 --> 00:18:56,520
Speaker 2: me too.

378
00:18:57,600 --> 00:18:58,919
Speaker 7: Yeah, me too, I'm proud of you.

379
00:18:59,119 --> 00:19:02,600
Speaker 8: I'm not big on gifts, receiving gifts because I'm terrible

380
00:19:02,640 --> 00:19:04,960
Speaker 8: at giving them, So I'd rather not receive because then

381
00:19:05,000 --> 00:19:05,720
Speaker 8: I feel guilty.

382
00:19:05,920 --> 00:19:08,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, you've got a lot of stuff tied up.

383
00:19:08,920 --> 00:19:09,680
Speaker 2: I enjoy giving.

384
00:19:10,080 --> 00:19:10,520
Speaker 7: It's hard.

385
00:19:10,560 --> 00:19:12,800
Speaker 8: I mean, you got to think about if you could

386
00:19:12,800 --> 00:19:16,240
Speaker 8: either get a really meaningful, cheap thing or you get

387
00:19:16,240 --> 00:19:19,320
Speaker 8: an expensive thing where it's overkilled and you never know

388
00:19:19,720 --> 00:19:22,080
Speaker 8: what if they're gonna like it.

389
00:19:22,480 --> 00:19:23,359
Speaker 7: I hate giving gifts.

390
00:19:23,480 --> 00:19:25,840
Speaker 1: He gets really stressed out about gift giving.

391
00:19:26,640 --> 00:19:29,359
Speaker 5: You give him a list when it's like that time of.

392
00:19:29,359 --> 00:19:31,720
Speaker 1: Like, I think I'm going to start giving him.

393
00:19:31,840 --> 00:19:33,639
Speaker 7: A list, like dig a little bit, I dig a

394
00:19:33,640 --> 00:19:34,000
Speaker 7: little bit.

395
00:19:34,160 --> 00:19:37,280
Speaker 3: You do dig and he's good to he he'll even

396
00:19:37,320 --> 00:19:44,600
Speaker 3: ask like a girlfriend like friends to sometimes and yeah,

397
00:19:44,720 --> 00:19:46,720
Speaker 3: I don't know which one. I think maybe for me

398
00:19:46,840 --> 00:19:49,399
Speaker 3: it might God, these are both.

399
00:19:51,320 --> 00:19:53,480
Speaker 1: I think if you're not a good person, you choose gift.

400
00:19:53,680 --> 00:19:58,320
Speaker 1: That's what I was gonna say, A surprise gift. Don't

401
00:19:58,320 --> 00:20:02,119
Speaker 1: mean that could be like anything like you know, I mean,

402
00:20:02,160 --> 00:20:02,679
Speaker 1: I love.

403
00:20:04,560 --> 00:20:04,960
Speaker 7: This one.

404
00:20:05,400 --> 00:20:08,680
Speaker 3: It could be like flowers from Trader Joe's, like whatever,

405
00:20:09,040 --> 00:20:09,280
Speaker 3: you know.

406
00:20:10,440 --> 00:20:18,000
Speaker 5: No, no, if they're flowers from Trader Jews, they better

407
00:20:18,040 --> 00:20:21,480
Speaker 5: be out of the plastic. I am not gonna lie.

408
00:20:21,760 --> 00:20:25,480
Speaker 5: I really have accepted. I have accepted that I like

409
00:20:25,520 --> 00:20:27,879
Speaker 5: a little bit of bouge in my life.

410
00:20:28,080 --> 00:20:30,360
Speaker 1: And that's okay. Not everybody does.

411
00:20:30,119 --> 00:20:32,719
Speaker 5: And that's all right too, that's all right, that's all right.

412
00:20:41,840 --> 00:20:44,919
Speaker 5: Would you rather spend a whole day together doing nothing

413
00:20:45,280 --> 00:20:46,720
Speaker 5: or receive a massage?

414
00:20:46,880 --> 00:20:49,320
Speaker 1: A whole day together? Whole day together doing nothing?

415
00:20:49,960 --> 00:20:50,160
Speaker 8: Yeah?

416
00:20:50,480 --> 00:20:52,040
Speaker 1: Oh I thought you would have said massage.

417
00:20:52,480 --> 00:20:53,920
Speaker 7: It's only an hour and a half.

418
00:20:54,480 --> 00:20:57,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, that could be another.

419
00:20:57,280 --> 00:21:01,160
Speaker 5: That could be you could do another time. What matters

420
00:21:01,200 --> 00:21:05,760
Speaker 5: more your partner remembering an important date with a gift,

421
00:21:06,080 --> 00:21:09,760
Speaker 5: or them helping you with a project you've been stressing about.

422
00:21:10,000 --> 00:21:15,160
Speaker 7: Oh, helping with the project.

423
00:21:16,119 --> 00:21:19,240
Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, I think same for me, actually helping me.

424
00:21:22,560 --> 00:21:24,920
Speaker 3: We know Stephanie's is important date with a gift.

425
00:21:25,240 --> 00:21:27,680
Speaker 5: I do think it might be that, although I think

426
00:21:27,680 --> 00:21:30,240
Speaker 5: it depends on the project, but like it was a

427
00:21:30,280 --> 00:21:32,919
Speaker 5: really big project. I don't know.

428
00:21:32,960 --> 00:21:34,399
Speaker 1: If it was a really big project, I feel like

429
00:21:34,440 --> 00:21:36,840
Speaker 1: I would just ask for your I think there's.

430
00:21:36,600 --> 00:21:41,119
Speaker 2: Some projects that you like can't wrap your head around doing,

431
00:21:41,240 --> 00:21:41,840
Speaker 2: so if.

432
00:21:41,720 --> 00:21:43,600
Speaker 1: I do tell I'm just kidding.

433
00:21:44,080 --> 00:21:46,120
Speaker 2: Like paying a parking ticket, for example.

434
00:21:46,119 --> 00:21:47,400
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, like that to.

435
00:21:47,400 --> 00:21:51,720
Speaker 2: Steph is like I can't even touch or look at this, so.

436
00:21:51,800 --> 00:21:53,400
Speaker 1: Like I don't know why. It gives you a lot

437
00:21:53,440 --> 00:21:54,040
Speaker 1: of anxiety.

438
00:21:54,119 --> 00:21:57,680
Speaker 2: I like, take it and pay it and tell her

439
00:21:57,680 --> 00:21:58,240
Speaker 2: it's done.

440
00:21:58,840 --> 00:22:02,120
Speaker 5: That's just like, oh, that's amazing, Thank you so much

441
00:22:02,160 --> 00:22:02,560
Speaker 5: for doing that.

442
00:22:02,680 --> 00:22:04,920
Speaker 6: Like I really do feel that way. I'm like, wow,

443
00:22:05,200 --> 00:22:06,080
Speaker 6: you saved me.

444
00:22:08,040 --> 00:22:11,800
Speaker 8: I mean I share your anxiety though tickets, anything with

445
00:22:11,920 --> 00:22:14,639
Speaker 8: law drivers. I just got to an accident not too

446
00:22:14,680 --> 00:22:17,840
Speaker 8: long ago. It's just so anxious, and I just hate

447
00:22:17,840 --> 00:22:21,560
Speaker 8: dealing with communication of any kind to do with this.

448
00:22:22,080 --> 00:22:24,679
Speaker 8: I just it's almost like she never should have happened

449
00:22:24,720 --> 00:22:26,399
Speaker 8: and just leave me alone kind of feeling.

450
00:22:26,600 --> 00:22:27,120
Speaker 7: I hate it.

451
00:22:27,560 --> 00:22:28,760
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's like if.

452
00:22:28,600 --> 00:22:31,000
Speaker 5: I have to go online and figure out how to

453
00:22:31,000 --> 00:22:33,600
Speaker 5: pay this, it means I deserved it or something.

454
00:22:33,600 --> 00:22:36,200
Speaker 1: I don't know, Like you booked up those.

455
00:22:36,040 --> 00:22:39,199
Speaker 2: Websites are the worst. Also, so they make you feel

456
00:22:39,440 --> 00:22:41,280
Speaker 2: stupid when you're like going on there.

457
00:22:41,600 --> 00:22:43,879
Speaker 1: Yeah, that is true. It do make you feel stupid.

458
00:22:45,080 --> 00:22:46,320
Speaker 1: They're not user friendly.

459
00:22:47,200 --> 00:22:50,159
Speaker 3: What is something your partner does that makes you feel

460
00:22:50,160 --> 00:22:50,800
Speaker 3: most loved?

461
00:22:52,400 --> 00:22:52,760
Speaker 6: Wow?

462
00:22:53,400 --> 00:22:56,640
Speaker 7: Woman, answer that yeah, hugs and kisses.

463
00:22:57,000 --> 00:23:01,320
Speaker 1: Ah, that's easy. What is for me?

464
00:23:04,040 --> 00:23:04,320
Speaker 5: Mmm?

465
00:23:06,119 --> 00:23:06,879
Speaker 1: I think.

466
00:23:08,840 --> 00:23:15,240
Speaker 3: Like making time for quality time, like when sometimes because

467
00:23:16,040 --> 00:23:18,879
Speaker 3: thankfully the nature of our jobs, like we get to

468
00:23:19,080 --> 00:23:21,640
Speaker 3: get a lot done during the week when it's slow,

469
00:23:22,280 --> 00:23:25,479
Speaker 3: and so sometimes when you're like you want to go

470
00:23:25,520 --> 00:23:29,239
Speaker 3: have lunch, I'm like, oh, like like a spontaneous day date,

471
00:23:29,480 --> 00:23:33,800
Speaker 3: you know. Yeah, I think that makes me feel the

472
00:23:33,840 --> 00:23:34,440
Speaker 3: most loved.

473
00:23:36,240 --> 00:23:36,640
Speaker 1: Yeah.

474
00:23:36,760 --> 00:23:39,679
Speaker 3: Or also when you like like kind of like the

475
00:23:39,680 --> 00:23:42,280
Speaker 3: words of affirmation, I think is another, like a big

476
00:23:42,320 --> 00:23:42,879
Speaker 3: one for me.

477
00:23:43,240 --> 00:23:44,640
Speaker 1: That might be my second.

478
00:23:46,800 --> 00:23:50,120
Speaker 3: When you just like when it's crazy and chaotic and

479
00:23:50,200 --> 00:23:55,359
Speaker 3: with the kids and you just like notice all the

480
00:23:55,400 --> 00:23:56,960
Speaker 3: things that are I'm doing.

481
00:23:57,040 --> 00:23:59,080
Speaker 1: That's that. I like that, That's nice.

482
00:24:00,960 --> 00:24:06,080
Speaker 5: I like that Brad's is a blowjob or sex.

483
00:24:07,880 --> 00:24:08,160
Speaker 6: Well.

484
00:24:08,600 --> 00:24:11,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, but also like if you if you were to

485
00:24:11,720 --> 00:24:14,600
Speaker 2: like I do like, I will say I know, I know.

486
00:24:14,640 --> 00:24:15,720
Speaker 2: They answer this question.

487
00:24:15,480 --> 00:24:18,560
Speaker 5: From sorry if you're listening to this children, it's that

488
00:24:19,000 --> 00:24:23,080
Speaker 5: or when he acknowledges it, he's like, yes, that is correct.

489
00:24:23,280 --> 00:24:26,560
Speaker 2: I love Sometimes Staph will like come through a room

490
00:24:26,600 --> 00:24:28,080
Speaker 2: and she'll give me a hug and then she'll just

491
00:24:28,080 --> 00:24:30,000
Speaker 2: look at me for a minute and then I'm just like, oh,

492
00:24:30,000 --> 00:24:34,800
Speaker 2: I'm good. I'm good for like the rest. So that's

493
00:24:34,840 --> 00:24:37,400
Speaker 2: really nice and it's like a it's like a quality

494
00:24:37,440 --> 00:24:40,199
Speaker 2: time moment too, even like a quick one, you know.

495
00:24:41,200 --> 00:24:41,640
Speaker 1: M hmm.

496
00:24:42,000 --> 00:24:43,120
Speaker 7: I like that a lot.

497
00:24:43,160 --> 00:24:45,520
Speaker 5: I thought of like eight jokes I can't do, okay,

498
00:24:47,240 --> 00:24:52,840
Speaker 5: China is I think minus when you when you're not

499
00:24:53,560 --> 00:24:55,840
Speaker 5: and please take this the way that I'm trying to

500
00:24:55,840 --> 00:24:58,640
Speaker 5: say it, But like when you sometimes you're like you're

501
00:24:58,680 --> 00:25:03,840
Speaker 5: doing great and you calm my anxiety. But sometimes you

502
00:25:03,880 --> 00:25:07,400
Speaker 5: do it kind of aggressively like you're doing great, you're

503
00:25:07,520 --> 00:25:10,600
Speaker 5: great mom. Like when it's like that, I don't like

504
00:25:10,680 --> 00:25:14,160
Speaker 5: it as much. But when you do it like calmly

505
00:25:14,520 --> 00:25:17,320
Speaker 5: and sort of like not in a way that's like

506
00:25:17,359 --> 00:25:20,080
Speaker 5: I told you this fifteen times, but like when you

507
00:25:20,119 --> 00:25:24,000
Speaker 5: do it, it's like really like you're doing great. You're great, mom,

508
00:25:24,160 --> 00:25:26,680
Speaker 5: You're great. You're like you're gonna be fine. Your career

509
00:25:26,760 --> 00:25:28,639
Speaker 5: is going to be okay, whatever it is, and whatever

510
00:25:28,680 --> 00:25:29,960
Speaker 5: anxiety that I have.

511
00:25:30,640 --> 00:25:32,919
Speaker 1: I'm gonna cry. But like when it's nice when you

512
00:25:32,960 --> 00:25:34,800
Speaker 1: do it like in a nice way instead of like.

513
00:25:37,280 --> 00:25:42,080
Speaker 5: Sometimes I feel like rad is like, uh thinks that

514
00:25:42,240 --> 00:25:45,959
Speaker 5: I think the way that he thinks about me, But

515
00:25:46,040 --> 00:25:47,480
Speaker 5: I don't.

516
00:25:47,760 --> 00:25:49,400
Speaker 1: I don't ruck that way on myself.

517
00:25:50,160 --> 00:25:52,840
Speaker 5: I don't, you know, sometimes I don't even like myself

518
00:25:53,000 --> 00:25:54,399
Speaker 5: and he likes me all the time.

519
00:25:54,560 --> 00:25:59,400
Speaker 1: You know, Yeah, that's definitely happened to us. I think

520
00:25:59,680 --> 00:26:00,720
Speaker 1: there was there was.

521
00:26:00,680 --> 00:26:05,200
Speaker 3: Like a I don't know, a big moment, a meaningful

522
00:26:05,240 --> 00:26:08,399
Speaker 3: moment for me when early on when we were dating

523
00:26:08,960 --> 00:26:12,440
Speaker 3: that I still had like a lot of I think

524
00:26:12,560 --> 00:26:17,000
Speaker 3: insecurities about work and myself.

525
00:26:16,600 --> 00:26:20,320
Speaker 1: And my abilities and and he.

526
00:26:20,240 --> 00:26:22,639
Speaker 3: Did take that like kind of aggressive tone that you

527
00:26:22,680 --> 00:26:26,080
Speaker 3: were just talking about. And I remember at first being

528
00:26:26,119 --> 00:26:30,280
Speaker 3: like all but like after I processed it for like

529
00:26:30,320 --> 00:26:31,880
Speaker 3: a day, I was like, oh shit.

530
00:26:31,760 --> 00:26:33,560
Speaker 1: That was like really nice what he said.

531
00:26:35,480 --> 00:26:37,439
Speaker 3: He he almost got mad at me where he was

532
00:26:37,480 --> 00:26:40,040
Speaker 3: like what he was like, I see you like a lion,

533
00:26:40,440 --> 00:26:42,639
Speaker 3: and you like to act like a lion, wearing like

534
00:26:42,760 --> 00:26:46,800
Speaker 3: sheep's clothes sometimes, like and you just you think you're

535
00:26:46,800 --> 00:26:48,119
Speaker 3: a sheep, but you're actually a lion.

536
00:26:48,160 --> 00:26:50,280
Speaker 1: You're just like wearing the sheep costume all the time.

537
00:26:50,520 --> 00:27:00,040
Speaker 6: Yea, it was football, but that once I like, I

538
00:27:00,440 --> 00:27:01,080
Speaker 6: got over.

539
00:27:01,000 --> 00:27:02,960
Speaker 1: My like your tone.

540
00:27:04,240 --> 00:27:07,320
Speaker 8: Well, because I do get a little heated sometimes when

541
00:27:07,320 --> 00:27:08,199
Speaker 8: I say that, I don't mean it.

542
00:27:08,200 --> 00:27:09,040
Speaker 7: This is the way I community.

543
00:27:09,040 --> 00:27:12,560
Speaker 3: You're very passionate, and you have a naturally loud voice.

544
00:27:13,080 --> 00:27:17,680
Speaker 8: Sometimes when she's going through an issue frustrated, I'm like, well,

545
00:27:17,720 --> 00:27:19,399
Speaker 8: she's going through an issue and I'm frustrated.

546
00:27:19,440 --> 00:27:21,240
Speaker 7: I'm like, what do you think it's wrong with you?

547
00:27:21,280 --> 00:27:23,359
Speaker 7: What do you think it's going on? And then she

548
00:27:23,359 --> 00:27:27,119
Speaker 7: says it, I'm like, well you're wrong, let's move on.

549
00:27:27,320 --> 00:27:31,879
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, it's like solution based, just trying to like, yeah, it's.

550
00:27:31,760 --> 00:27:35,880
Speaker 5: Solution based, yeah, but it's it's emotionally based for us

551
00:27:36,080 --> 00:27:40,240
Speaker 5: because we're you know, we're literally dealing with our most

552
00:27:40,320 --> 00:27:43,240
Speaker 5: vulnerable things, which is our insecurities, which is some old

553
00:27:43,320 --> 00:27:45,679
Speaker 5: old voices in our head that are like, you're not

554
00:27:45,760 --> 00:27:48,560
Speaker 5: good enough, you don't you're you don't deserve this, you

555
00:27:48,600 --> 00:27:50,359
Speaker 5: don't X y Z or whatever.

556
00:27:50,720 --> 00:27:52,840
Speaker 1: And then we share it with you and you're like,

557
00:27:53,520 --> 00:27:57,439
Speaker 1: what are you talking about? And it's like I don't know,

558
00:27:57,880 --> 00:28:00,320
Speaker 1: I guess I'm stupid now anyway.

559
00:28:00,520 --> 00:28:05,560
Speaker 3: That's uh so if you can identify with that, But

560
00:28:05,640 --> 00:28:08,640
Speaker 3: that is like, isn't that also from that? I feel

561
00:28:08,680 --> 00:28:10,640
Speaker 3: like I read that book to a really long time ago,

562
00:28:10,760 --> 00:28:14,160
Speaker 3: like the men are for mars women and women right,

563
00:28:14,280 --> 00:28:16,120
Speaker 3: and this is that like a little part of it too,

564
00:28:16,359 --> 00:28:23,159
Speaker 3: Like women are more like cerebral and and and I

565
00:28:23,160 --> 00:28:26,280
Speaker 3: don't want to say emotional, but you know like smart,

566
00:28:26,320 --> 00:28:28,880
Speaker 3: they're smart, and men have a tendency to like want

567
00:28:28,880 --> 00:28:32,400
Speaker 3: to fix everything, and sometimes that's to disconnect with couples

568
00:28:32,480 --> 00:28:34,120
Speaker 3: of like I just want.

569
00:28:33,960 --> 00:28:37,800
Speaker 1: You to listen and be like, oh that sucks. But

570
00:28:37,960 --> 00:28:39,160
Speaker 1: like a lot of.

571
00:28:39,120 --> 00:28:43,040
Speaker 3: Times dudes have just like they want to they're fixers,

572
00:28:43,360 --> 00:28:45,600
Speaker 3: and so they want to like give advice or make

573
00:28:45,640 --> 00:28:47,800
Speaker 3: you feel better or like fix the thing in the moment,

574
00:28:47,920 --> 00:28:51,680
Speaker 3: and sometimes you don't always need that. It's like the

575
00:28:51,720 --> 00:28:55,240
Speaker 3: way that girlfriends talk to each other can be very

576
00:28:55,280 --> 00:28:57,360
Speaker 3: like oh man, that sucks, Like I would fucking be

577
00:28:57,440 --> 00:28:59,480
Speaker 3: mad too, you know, like that's how we ki key

578
00:29:00,040 --> 00:29:04,760
Speaker 3: And then uh, dudes don't like dudes when they're when

579
00:29:04,760 --> 00:29:07,040
Speaker 3: a guy and when guy friends are even you know,

580
00:29:07,320 --> 00:29:10,600
Speaker 3: venting to each other. Right, It's like it turns into like, uh,

581
00:29:11,640 --> 00:29:15,520
Speaker 3: advice session or like a you know, do this, do that,

582
00:29:15,640 --> 00:29:18,560
Speaker 3: do this, yeah and so, and it's just the male

583
00:29:18,720 --> 00:29:22,960
Speaker 3: brain and the female brain, and I think like, yeah,

584
00:29:23,040 --> 00:29:26,920
Speaker 3: in the over time, you know, I remember a lot

585
00:29:26,920 --> 00:29:28,640
Speaker 3: when we were younger, just being like, I.

586
00:29:28,560 --> 00:29:31,400
Speaker 1: Don't need you to fix it. Just listen and not

587
00:29:31,520 --> 00:29:31,920
Speaker 1: your head.

588
00:29:32,320 --> 00:29:34,200
Speaker 3: I'm at the top and you're gonna listen and you're

589
00:29:34,240 --> 00:29:36,480
Speaker 3: not your head, and you're gonna be like that sucks, babe.

590
00:29:36,480 --> 00:29:37,600
Speaker 1: That's it. That's all you have to do.

591
00:29:38,480 --> 00:29:41,960
Speaker 8: I remember many a time. I remember many a times

592
00:29:42,040 --> 00:29:44,160
Speaker 8: where she would be bitching and I'd be listening. In

593
00:29:44,160 --> 00:29:46,120
Speaker 8: my mind, I'm like, what the fuck is she talking about?

594
00:29:46,720 --> 00:29:48,880
Speaker 8: But then I would be like, right, babe, it's cool,

595
00:29:49,160 --> 00:29:51,080
Speaker 8: Like literally, that's what's going on in my head. I

596
00:29:51,120 --> 00:29:53,240
Speaker 8: don't understand, but you know what, I'm just gonna sit right,

597
00:29:54,920 --> 00:29:57,520
Speaker 8: you know, and you see the next day is better.

598
00:29:57,560 --> 00:30:00,040
Speaker 8: I'm like, fuck, I'm glad I didn't say anything I

599
00:30:00,080 --> 00:30:01,680
Speaker 8: had an interfere with that, you know.

600
00:30:02,480 --> 00:30:04,120
Speaker 1: She I just needed to get it out. I just

601
00:30:04,160 --> 00:30:05,040
Speaker 1: needed to get it out.

602
00:30:06,120 --> 00:30:07,400
Speaker 5: Sometimes you got to get it out.

603
00:30:07,480 --> 00:30:09,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, to be fair, women.

604
00:30:09,560 --> 00:30:10,800
Speaker 6: I think feel that way.

605
00:30:10,640 --> 00:30:12,600
Speaker 5: Too sometimes when we're listening and we're like, what the

606
00:30:12,600 --> 00:30:14,000
Speaker 5: fuck is he talking about?

607
00:30:14,080 --> 00:30:15,200
Speaker 1: What is he going on about?

608
00:30:16,480 --> 00:30:21,520
Speaker 5: And the correct you know thing to do usually is like, oh,

609
00:30:21,560 --> 00:30:24,160
Speaker 5: tell me more, like why why is that so upsetting

610
00:30:24,200 --> 00:30:30,360
Speaker 5: that those football players got picked for those fantasy people's

611
00:30:30,360 --> 00:30:31,560
Speaker 5: teams instead of yours?

612
00:30:32,080 --> 00:30:34,480
Speaker 1: Uh huh? And then so now what happens if you

613
00:30:34,520 --> 00:30:35,600
Speaker 1: have two quarterbacks?

614
00:30:35,800 --> 00:30:36,440
Speaker 5: I don't really know.

615
00:30:39,880 --> 00:30:42,680
Speaker 1: How do you want your partner to celebrate with you?

616
00:30:42,800 --> 00:30:45,200
Speaker 5: Like, what is a what is a thing that you

617
00:30:45,200 --> 00:30:49,280
Speaker 5: guys share celebratory wise?

618
00:30:49,320 --> 00:30:50,680
Speaker 1: That feels like you.

619
00:30:50,640 --> 00:30:51,080
Speaker 2: Know what I mean?

620
00:30:51,160 --> 00:30:54,760
Speaker 5: Like I think sometimes it's like someone got a job

621
00:30:54,840 --> 00:30:57,480
Speaker 5: and like they get a dozen roses, Like I don't

622
00:30:57,520 --> 00:30:58,160
Speaker 5: think I would like that.

623
00:31:00,120 --> 00:31:05,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, I feel like this is actually something. Yeah, I

624
00:31:05,640 --> 00:31:07,400
Speaker 1: feel like this is something we could.

625
00:31:07,160 --> 00:31:09,920
Speaker 7: Be better at celebrating.

626
00:31:09,680 --> 00:31:13,800
Speaker 3: Celebrating like big wins or I guess in our case,

627
00:31:13,960 --> 00:31:21,920
Speaker 3: like big jobs or any sort of like accomplishment.

628
00:31:21,520 --> 00:31:27,480
Speaker 8: You know, right, Well, well the question was how do

629
00:31:27,520 --> 00:31:30,640
Speaker 8: we celebrate, Well, we'd like the time thing, right, like

630
00:31:30,720 --> 00:31:33,959
Speaker 8: I remember, before Enzo happened, we would do the weekends

631
00:31:34,000 --> 00:31:40,600
Speaker 8: in Santa Barbara. Yeah, before actually the last time we

632
00:31:40,640 --> 00:31:43,800
Speaker 8: went we found out. It was right before the day

633
00:31:43,840 --> 00:31:46,000
Speaker 8: before we found out she was pregnant with Enzo. It

634
00:31:46,040 --> 00:31:47,440
Speaker 8: was the last time we went to Santa Barbara.

635
00:31:47,600 --> 00:31:51,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, we just roamed around Santa Barbara like zombies, like

636
00:31:51,400 --> 00:31:53,240
Speaker 3: so sober.

637
00:31:54,680 --> 00:31:57,560
Speaker 8: Drink and eat and drink and eat, and it was

638
00:31:57,680 --> 00:31:59,920
Speaker 8: a great weekend we used to have and just talk.

639
00:32:00,600 --> 00:32:03,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think maybe we were better at the celebratory

640
00:32:03,280 --> 00:32:06,160
Speaker 3: thing before kids. And yeah, because we would we would

641
00:32:06,160 --> 00:32:09,200
Speaker 3: do like last minute like weekend get away or you know.

642
00:32:11,320 --> 00:32:13,880
Speaker 3: And now I mean we celebrate. We get like pumped

643
00:32:13,960 --> 00:32:15,400
Speaker 3: for each other. But it's like.

644
00:32:15,480 --> 00:32:16,760
Speaker 6: Yay, whoa, you did it?

645
00:32:16,800 --> 00:32:19,560
Speaker 1: All right? What's for dinner? Do you should we order tonight?

646
00:32:19,680 --> 00:32:24,520
Speaker 1: Like that's a little bit of celebrating ordering food.

647
00:32:24,840 --> 00:32:28,160
Speaker 6: Like yeah, again, yeah I get.

648
00:32:28,280 --> 00:32:32,120
Speaker 3: I mean, yeah, we celebrate, but like, yeah, in smaller ways.

649
00:32:32,240 --> 00:32:34,680
Speaker 3: I guess it's it's something I think it's something we

650
00:32:34,680 --> 00:32:36,400
Speaker 3: could be we could be more better at.

651
00:32:36,880 --> 00:32:39,480
Speaker 1: What about you guys? What do you guys do to celebrate?

652
00:32:40,240 --> 00:32:43,000
Speaker 2: We eat? We eat, we go out to eat. Yeah,

653
00:32:43,120 --> 00:32:45,960
Speaker 2: like we'll be like let's try this new restaurant.

654
00:32:45,480 --> 00:32:48,680
Speaker 1: And like, yeah, I see that's a good one.

655
00:32:48,720 --> 00:32:52,840
Speaker 3: That's a good easy one that we could definitely into

656
00:32:52,880 --> 00:32:55,480
Speaker 3: our lives that we just need to do.

657
00:32:56,760 --> 00:32:58,960
Speaker 5: That's a that was actually one of the things that

658
00:32:59,000 --> 00:33:02,640
Speaker 5: I liked about right off the bat, was like, you know,

659
00:33:02,880 --> 00:33:07,400
Speaker 5: this is a town that is, you know, can be

660
00:33:07,440 --> 00:33:14,120
Speaker 5: really obsessed with looks and you know, staying a certain size,

661
00:33:14,240 --> 00:33:18,000
Speaker 5: and you know, we've had we've had parties before where

662
00:33:18,040 --> 00:33:19,960
Speaker 5: like a friend will show up and be like, I

663
00:33:20,240 --> 00:33:22,720
Speaker 5: brought my own chicken breastack to put in your fridge,

664
00:33:22,720 --> 00:33:23,120
Speaker 5: and it's.

665
00:33:23,000 --> 00:33:26,720
Speaker 6: Like, okay, you're on a cut. That's fine, Sure, go ahead,

666
00:33:27,160 --> 00:33:27,440
Speaker 6: you know.

667
00:33:28,600 --> 00:33:31,360
Speaker 5: But like for me, that wasn't something that like I

668
00:33:32,440 --> 00:33:35,360
Speaker 5: just had been like restricting my food so much when

669
00:33:35,360 --> 00:33:37,520
Speaker 5: I met Brad, and so like meeting Brad and like

670
00:33:37,680 --> 00:33:41,760
Speaker 5: enjoying food again and like experiencing food and experiencing how

671
00:33:41,760 --> 00:33:44,160
Speaker 5: passionate he is about good food and not just like

672
00:33:44,280 --> 00:33:46,800
Speaker 5: any food, right, although he does love taco bell, but

673
00:33:46,880 --> 00:33:51,479
Speaker 5: like love it really good food. The way he reads

674
00:33:51,520 --> 00:33:54,560
Speaker 5: about food, and like how he wants to experience new

675
00:33:54,560 --> 00:33:57,160
Speaker 5: restaurants all the time. And sometimes I'll be like I'm

676
00:33:57,200 --> 00:33:58,560
Speaker 5: in this area of town, I don't know where to

677
00:33:58,600 --> 00:34:00,880
Speaker 5: go for lunch, and I'll send me like three places right.

678
00:34:01,640 --> 00:34:05,200
Speaker 5: So to celebrate we usually like we for our anniversary,

679
00:34:05,200 --> 00:34:07,240
Speaker 5: we went to this really incredible dinner. Could I tell

680
00:34:07,240 --> 00:34:08,239
Speaker 5: you the name of the restaurant?

681
00:34:08,480 --> 00:34:13,319
Speaker 1: No, there it is, Yeah, it was called and it

682
00:34:13,360 --> 00:34:16,200
Speaker 1: was so good. It was amazing.

683
00:34:16,920 --> 00:34:20,640
Speaker 5: It was amazing and like the theatricality of everything that happened.

684
00:34:20,680 --> 00:34:23,120
Speaker 5: I was sober that dinner, and they brought me like mocktails,

685
00:34:23,280 --> 00:34:27,160
Speaker 5: a mocktail pairing, we almost everything else. Yeah, I mean,

686
00:34:27,200 --> 00:34:29,040
Speaker 5: like I and I just never would go out of

687
00:34:29,040 --> 00:34:31,360
Speaker 5: my way to do that if it wasn't for Brad.

688
00:34:31,400 --> 00:34:34,759
Speaker 1: But like we celebrate with food a lot. It's nice.

689
00:34:35,280 --> 00:34:38,800
Speaker 2: It's an excuse to like it's like, whoa, we're celebrating.

690
00:34:38,880 --> 00:34:41,480
Speaker 2: Let's go to this amazing restaurant we've been talking about.

691
00:34:41,239 --> 00:34:41,680
Speaker 7: For a while.

692
00:34:41,719 --> 00:34:44,400
Speaker 5: And then we shared the experience of eating together, you know,

693
00:34:44,480 --> 00:34:46,040
Speaker 5: like we share like what we think and how we

694
00:34:46,080 --> 00:34:48,839
Speaker 5: feel about the food and like what it like the.

695
00:34:48,760 --> 00:34:51,320
Speaker 1: Other night, that potato pizza thing. I was like, I

696
00:34:51,360 --> 00:34:51,920
Speaker 1: don't like it.

697
00:34:52,000 --> 00:34:54,960
Speaker 5: I don't like it, and here's why, And Brad was like,

698
00:34:55,040 --> 00:34:56,680
Speaker 5: I really like it. I didn't get the big bite

699
00:34:56,719 --> 00:34:59,440
Speaker 5: of garlic that you think you got, So it changed

700
00:34:59,440 --> 00:35:02,200
Speaker 5: my experience. So the pizza completely you know whatever else

701
00:35:02,360 --> 00:35:04,120
Speaker 5: like not super nerdy.

702
00:35:04,200 --> 00:35:05,880
Speaker 3: Yeah, And I feel like, yeah, like you said, it's

703
00:35:05,920 --> 00:35:08,880
Speaker 3: a shared experience, and I think it's a good reminder

704
00:35:08,880 --> 00:35:10,719
Speaker 3: because like we were actually just talking about this the

705
00:35:10,760 --> 00:35:14,080
Speaker 3: other day, about getting better about going out to dinner

706
00:35:14,200 --> 00:35:17,399
Speaker 3: and like, you know, coming out of like the holidays

707
00:35:17,600 --> 00:35:20,920
Speaker 3: like haze, Like I feel like we're just starting to

708
00:35:20,960 --> 00:35:23,640
Speaker 3: come back to life where we can be social again.

709
00:35:25,520 --> 00:35:26,480
Speaker 1: But I feel like.

710
00:35:28,320 --> 00:35:32,440
Speaker 3: At this chapter of life and like kids and everything,

711
00:35:32,480 --> 00:35:37,719
Speaker 3: being so busy, that feels like an attainable, easy thing

712
00:35:37,840 --> 00:35:41,080
Speaker 3: to do is like even if it's once a month

713
00:35:41,160 --> 00:35:43,920
Speaker 3: or whatever, you know, it doesn't have to be with

714
00:35:43,960 --> 00:35:44,719
Speaker 3: great frequency.

715
00:35:44,760 --> 00:35:46,800
Speaker 1: It's just like yeah, yeah.

716
00:35:47,239 --> 00:35:49,799
Speaker 3: Like trying a new restaurant every time, you know, Like

717
00:35:49,880 --> 00:35:51,920
Speaker 3: that's so I think that's so fun that you guys

718
00:35:51,960 --> 00:35:54,640
Speaker 3: do that, and that you are always at these new

719
00:35:54,680 --> 00:35:58,520
Speaker 3: spots and like experiencing new food and you know, talking

720
00:35:58,520 --> 00:36:00,759
Speaker 3: about what you like and don't like, Like that makes

721
00:36:00,800 --> 00:36:02,799
Speaker 3: it so fun. You know, it's also fun to go

722
00:36:02,840 --> 00:36:04,720
Speaker 3: to like places that you go to all the time

723
00:36:04,800 --> 00:36:09,200
Speaker 3: and the familiarity of that. But you know, I think

724
00:36:09,520 --> 00:36:12,960
Speaker 3: when you're busy and you're like and you've got little kids,

725
00:36:13,640 --> 00:36:16,960
Speaker 3: that's such an easy fun thing to do. It's like,

726
00:36:17,080 --> 00:36:20,760
Speaker 3: let's go to a new restaurant once a month. Yeah,

727
00:36:20,840 --> 00:36:23,680
Speaker 3: I mean the planning party turns figuring out what restaurant

728
00:36:23,760 --> 00:36:27,640
Speaker 3: or whatever. But like, yeah, it does take some effort,

729
00:36:27,640 --> 00:36:29,480
Speaker 3: all right, Like especially if you do have kids, you

730
00:36:29,920 --> 00:36:32,040
Speaker 3: do have to have somebody watching your kid unless they're

731
00:36:32,040 --> 00:36:34,120
Speaker 3: in school. And like you guys said, you can get

732
00:36:34,200 --> 00:36:36,680
Speaker 3: lunch or like yeah, unless you do like a day day,

733
00:36:36,920 --> 00:36:37,560
Speaker 3: like a lunch thing.

734
00:36:37,960 --> 00:36:42,360
Speaker 5: Yeah, but that's more accessible to people that are freelanced

735
00:36:42,400 --> 00:36:45,960
Speaker 5: like us. Right, Okay, I want to ask this question.

736
00:36:46,080 --> 00:36:50,240
Speaker 5: Do you remember the worst gift that David gave you Melissa?

737
00:36:51,040 --> 00:36:54,600
Speaker 5: And do you remember the worst gift that Melissa gave

738
00:36:54,600 --> 00:36:56,320
Speaker 5: you David.

739
00:36:58,200 --> 00:37:00,000
Speaker 7: I can't think of them.

740
00:37:01,040 --> 00:37:02,719
Speaker 1: No, I've definitely given you.

741
00:37:02,760 --> 00:37:08,280
Speaker 3: We've been together for twenty years, babar better.

742
00:37:13,880 --> 00:37:14,600
Speaker 1: I can.

743
00:37:14,800 --> 00:37:17,520
Speaker 3: I know some bad gifts that I sometimes will try.

744
00:37:17,840 --> 00:37:20,279
Speaker 3: I know bad gifts I gave you. I will sometimes

745
00:37:20,320 --> 00:37:23,120
Speaker 3: try to spruce up David's wardrobe. As you can see,

746
00:37:23,160 --> 00:37:26,359
Speaker 3: my man is a man of comfort now when he

747
00:37:26,440 --> 00:37:30,040
Speaker 3: needs to put on a suit homeboy, because of those

748
00:37:30,120 --> 00:37:33,600
Speaker 3: modeling years in his early twenties knows how to pick

749
00:37:33,600 --> 00:37:36,960
Speaker 3: a good suit, knows good tailoring, like knows how to

750
00:37:37,040 --> 00:37:38,600
Speaker 3: do that with his eyes closed.

751
00:37:39,120 --> 00:37:39,680
Speaker 1: That's cool.

752
00:37:40,120 --> 00:37:43,120
Speaker 3: It's like the in between the every day. He is

753
00:37:43,520 --> 00:37:48,560
Speaker 3: constantly in flege ware in sts, and there have been

754
00:37:48,600 --> 00:37:53,120
Speaker 3: times where I've tried to buy him a sweater I

755
00:37:53,200 --> 00:37:56,200
Speaker 3: thought was maybe a little more elevated but still casual

756
00:37:56,239 --> 00:37:58,680
Speaker 3: and comfortable you can wear every day, and he just

757
00:37:58,680 --> 00:38:00,480
Speaker 3: straight up is like, I will never wear this.

758
00:38:01,040 --> 00:38:02,520
Speaker 1: That's good, I'll never.

759
00:38:02,760 --> 00:38:05,000
Speaker 6: At least he's honest and it's not like, oh, thanks

760
00:38:05,040 --> 00:38:05,520
Speaker 6: so much.

761
00:38:05,760 --> 00:38:08,880
Speaker 1: I've given you some sweaters that you were like straight up.

762
00:38:08,800 --> 00:38:14,200
Speaker 7: Like, yes, yeah, sweaters for sure, now that you mentioned it.

763
00:38:14,280 --> 00:38:19,880
Speaker 1: Sweaters. There's been, there's been, there's been several attempts or

764
00:38:19,920 --> 00:38:22,280
Speaker 1: a cardigan. I feel like I gave you a cardigan once.

765
00:38:22,400 --> 00:38:24,239
Speaker 3: I was like, you just throw it over a T

766
00:38:24,320 --> 00:38:30,120
Speaker 3: shirt and look your card again, right, I mean, listen, Stephanie,

767
00:38:30,719 --> 00:38:37,319
Speaker 3: I've been together since two thousand and said no two

768
00:38:37,320 --> 00:38:40,480
Speaker 3: thousand and four. Okay, So at a time there was

769
00:38:40,520 --> 00:38:43,600
Speaker 3: a time where like male cardigans were cute.

770
00:38:43,960 --> 00:38:48,120
Speaker 5: It's still around. That time's still around. Some guys really

771
00:38:48,120 --> 00:38:51,920
Speaker 5: look great in the cardigan. David fumero. I don't think so,

772
00:38:52,840 --> 00:38:55,400
Speaker 5: not in the cardigan, unless you'd cast him as like

773
00:38:55,400 --> 00:38:56,960
Speaker 5: a school teacher or something like that.

774
00:38:57,000 --> 00:39:02,320
Speaker 3: And even then I was a version David, a everyday

775
00:39:02,320 --> 00:39:05,600
Speaker 3: casual version of David that I think would is it

776
00:39:05,640 --> 00:39:07,680
Speaker 3: would be so cute and hot.

777
00:39:09,200 --> 00:39:14,799
Speaker 1: Maybe like a J Crew fitted shawl collar. Yeah, like

778
00:39:14,840 --> 00:39:16,640
Speaker 1: a J Crew kind of vibe.

779
00:39:16,760 --> 00:39:19,959
Speaker 3: Not the khaki pants, but like you know that sort

780
00:39:20,040 --> 00:39:22,879
Speaker 3: of just Slightly's all right.

781
00:39:23,040 --> 00:39:26,120
Speaker 1: He likes to be comfortable, okay for.

782
00:39:26,200 --> 00:39:30,720
Speaker 3: Me, I think I uh, there were some jewelry gifts

783
00:39:30,719 --> 00:39:36,560
Speaker 3: in the very beginning. Your your chaste and jewelry has

784
00:39:36,560 --> 00:39:40,320
Speaker 3: gotten so much better. There were a pair of earrings.

785
00:39:40,360 --> 00:39:41,960
Speaker 3: I might not have said anything because I didn't want

786
00:39:41,960 --> 00:39:43,839
Speaker 3: to hurt your feelings, but there was definitely a pair

787
00:39:43,880 --> 00:39:46,680
Speaker 3: of ear rings you bought me after you went to

788
00:39:46,719 --> 00:39:47,320
Speaker 3: Saint Martin.

789
00:39:47,440 --> 00:39:51,440
Speaker 1: I think that I had never I was like, oh no,

790
00:39:52,520 --> 00:39:54,440
Speaker 1: I don't even remember. I think I don't remember.

791
00:39:54,600 --> 00:39:58,320
Speaker 3: They were like maybe too colorful or they were something

792
00:39:59,239 --> 00:40:01,640
Speaker 3: and I but I just remember being like, oh no,

793
00:40:01,680 --> 00:40:04,400
Speaker 3: and yeah I did the it was still early on.

794
00:40:04,560 --> 00:40:08,760
Speaker 1: I was like, oh, they're so pity, thank you for thinking.

795
00:40:08,760 --> 00:40:09,719
Speaker 1: I just never wore them.

796
00:40:10,920 --> 00:40:14,840
Speaker 6: Mm hmmm, what was your worst?

797
00:40:15,680 --> 00:40:18,160
Speaker 2: I'm I was racking my brain on that too, and

798
00:40:18,200 --> 00:40:20,840
Speaker 2: I think it's it's probably it was probably something of

799
00:40:20,960 --> 00:40:25,160
Speaker 2: color that you tried to get me to wear, since I.

800
00:40:24,200 --> 00:40:29,600
Speaker 6: Don't what a stupid idiot I will like.

801
00:40:32,280 --> 00:40:35,200
Speaker 2: Or you know something that was you did.

802
00:40:35,040 --> 00:40:36,799
Speaker 1: Wear that tied eye sweatshirt I got you for?

803
00:40:37,360 --> 00:40:38,759
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know what she got me a tied eye

804
00:40:38,800 --> 00:40:41,120
Speaker 2: sweatshirt that like when I when I first saw it,

805
00:40:41,160 --> 00:40:44,160
Speaker 2: I was like, oh ship, and then I loved it

806
00:40:44,239 --> 00:40:46,959
Speaker 2: so like maybe that one. At the moment, I thought

807
00:40:46,960 --> 00:40:48,319
Speaker 2: it was going to be the worst, but then it

808
00:40:48,480 --> 00:40:50,520
Speaker 2: ended up being something that the game like a stable

809
00:40:50,640 --> 00:40:52,160
Speaker 2: that I wore like all the time, and it's like

810
00:40:52,160 --> 00:40:56,440
Speaker 2: a tied eye purple and orange, you know hoodie and.

811
00:40:56,520 --> 00:41:00,600
Speaker 5: Yeah it's gone now, but it's it's been retired. Okay, Okay,

812
00:41:01,800 --> 00:41:06,799
Speaker 5: I think I don't think anything. I mean, there have

813
00:41:06,800 --> 00:41:09,160
Speaker 5: been like a couple of misses on like a T shirt,

814
00:41:09,320 --> 00:41:11,160
Speaker 5: Like He's gone to like a concert and brought back

815
00:41:11,200 --> 00:41:14,160
Speaker 5: a T shirt or something, and I'm like, oh, you know,

816
00:41:14,320 --> 00:41:18,560
Speaker 5: because I'm very picky about T shirts. I just like

817
00:41:18,800 --> 00:41:20,440
Speaker 5: I'm like David in that way, like I like to

818
00:41:20,480 --> 00:41:22,600
Speaker 5: be comfortable, and I like my stuff to you know,

819
00:41:22,760 --> 00:41:26,320
Speaker 5: feel and fit a certain way. My my vintage T

820
00:41:26,400 --> 00:41:28,279
Speaker 5: shirt collection is very near and dear to my heart.

821
00:41:28,360 --> 00:41:31,719
Speaker 5: So anything introduced into that collection has to be like worthwhile.

822
00:41:31,760 --> 00:41:33,480
Speaker 5: And some of the stuff that Brad has gotten me

823
00:41:33,600 --> 00:41:35,920
Speaker 5: is like, thank you so much, and then I wear

824
00:41:36,040 --> 00:41:48,440
Speaker 5: like twice for someone else, someone else for someone else. Okay, yeah, yeah,

825
00:41:48,480 --> 00:41:51,319
Speaker 5: And you know I like that silver locket that you

826
00:41:51,360 --> 00:41:51,680
Speaker 5: got me.

827
00:41:51,840 --> 00:41:54,440
Speaker 1: Who would have liked gold, but I like a silver.

828
00:41:55,960 --> 00:41:57,240
Speaker 2: Oh yeah.

829
00:41:57,320 --> 00:41:59,279
Speaker 1: But he looked he didn't do his due diligence. He

830
00:41:59,400 --> 00:42:00,520
Speaker 1: looked in my ra and.

831
00:42:00,480 --> 00:42:01,920
Speaker 5: He was like, oh, she has a lot of gold

832
00:42:01,920 --> 00:42:05,760
Speaker 5: stuff already, I'll get her something silver, which is really sweet.

833
00:42:05,800 --> 00:42:09,240
Speaker 5: Oh yeah, that's sweet. So that makes it special. That

834
00:42:09,320 --> 00:42:12,440
Speaker 5: does make it special because that's apart from your usual stuff.

835
00:42:13,480 --> 00:42:16,120
Speaker 1: And also the all he tried, he tried so hard,

836
00:42:16,400 --> 00:42:17,240
Speaker 1: it's really sweet.

837
00:42:17,840 --> 00:42:19,640
Speaker 3: I mean, listen, you have to have a sense of

838
00:42:19,680 --> 00:42:22,160
Speaker 3: humor about these things, you know what I mean, Like

839
00:42:22,640 --> 00:42:27,160
Speaker 3: it's gift giving is hard, and like the longer you've

840
00:42:27,200 --> 00:42:32,479
Speaker 3: been together too, like we're going on, I mean, it's hard,

841
00:42:32,480 --> 00:42:36,680
Speaker 3: but it's not that hard, girl, twenty, It's not that hard.

842
00:42:36,920 --> 00:42:38,879
Speaker 1: Married together twenty years.

843
00:42:42,000 --> 00:42:43,600
Speaker 7: Eighteen.

844
00:42:43,640 --> 00:42:45,560
Speaker 1: Oh my god, we forget how long we were married.

845
00:42:45,600 --> 00:42:51,960
Speaker 5: Okay, but I'm well eighteen listen, I had an exit

846
00:42:52,040 --> 00:42:56,200
Speaker 5: gave me a fucking blender. Okay, so yeah, no, there's

847
00:42:56,239 --> 00:42:59,319
Speaker 5: like yeah like that, I guess, but I'm saying, like

848
00:42:59,480 --> 00:43:02,040
Speaker 5: when it's you gave an ex.

849
00:43:01,920 --> 00:43:06,799
Speaker 8: Girlfriend a blender, I gave an extra friend and she

850
00:43:06,880 --> 00:43:09,120
Speaker 8: was sofed by that blender. But I was like, it's

851
00:43:09,160 --> 00:43:12,600
Speaker 8: a fucking great blender and you needed one, so isn't.

852
00:43:12,400 --> 00:43:17,319
Speaker 6: It has to be like a blender with like what

853
00:43:17,440 --> 00:43:17,960
Speaker 6: the fuck is this?

854
00:43:17,960 --> 00:43:18,280
Speaker 1: President?

855
00:43:18,480 --> 00:43:20,920
Speaker 5: You didn't look inside the blender and then there's like

856
00:43:20,920 --> 00:43:22,960
Speaker 5: a pair of ear rings or something, And then I

857
00:43:24,440 --> 00:43:26,759
Speaker 5: was like, don't no appliances.

858
00:43:26,800 --> 00:43:28,040
Speaker 1: It's not acceptable.

859
00:43:28,400 --> 00:43:30,920
Speaker 2: Functional gifts. I want you two functional.

860
00:43:31,480 --> 00:43:33,920
Speaker 3: Well, I think one gets harder at least well for me,

861
00:43:34,160 --> 00:43:37,840
Speaker 3: Like with David is anytime he needs something, he's the

862
00:43:37,880 --> 00:43:41,200
Speaker 3: kind of person that just like gets it. And then

863
00:43:41,520 --> 00:43:45,280
Speaker 3: so then it's hard to think of like fun gifts

864
00:43:45,360 --> 00:43:49,799
Speaker 3: to sometimes because it has to be Yeah, it's like

865
00:43:50,000 --> 00:43:53,399
Speaker 3: it's we're just bordering. I feel like life legit run

866
00:43:53,400 --> 00:43:57,680
Speaker 3: out of ideas. Sometimes I get so happy, like huh

867
00:43:58,320 --> 00:43:58,840
Speaker 3: and now.

868
00:43:58,719 --> 00:44:01,960
Speaker 5: We're bordering on like experiences, like we've hit the place

869
00:44:02,000 --> 00:44:03,520
Speaker 5: in our lives where like we have.

870
00:44:04,719 --> 00:44:07,560
Speaker 6: We've got stuff. We're older, we've had they had.

871
00:44:07,400 --> 00:44:12,080
Speaker 5: This money and like for Brad's birthday, his favorite band,

872
00:44:12,800 --> 00:44:14,759
Speaker 5: this T shirt that he's wearing. His favorite band was

873
00:44:14,800 --> 00:44:17,600
Speaker 5: playing in London and I was like, are they going

874
00:44:17,640 --> 00:44:19,320
Speaker 5: to play in the US. He said, no, they're not

875
00:44:19,320 --> 00:44:20,799
Speaker 5: going to play in the US. They're only playing in London.

876
00:44:20,800 --> 00:44:22,600
Speaker 5: I was like, why don't you go, Like why don't

877
00:44:22,600 --> 00:44:23,520
Speaker 5: you use our credit.

878
00:44:23,280 --> 00:44:24,919
Speaker 1: Card points and go? And he was like.

879
00:44:26,560 --> 00:44:28,680
Speaker 5: He went by himself and he had a great time,

880
00:44:29,000 --> 00:44:30,560
Speaker 5: you know, and that's something he'll never forget.

881
00:44:30,640 --> 00:44:31,160
Speaker 2: It was amazing.

882
00:44:32,120 --> 00:44:35,520
Speaker 5: So like we are starting to border on like now

883
00:44:35,560 --> 00:44:39,000
Speaker 5: you can think of like experience, serial experiential, like.

884
00:44:39,680 --> 00:44:42,000
Speaker 1: It meant to like an Iron Man or something. He

885
00:44:42,040 --> 00:44:46,279
Speaker 1: would do it. No, yeah, I did know it almost well.

886
00:44:46,320 --> 00:44:48,000
Speaker 3: I already told you about it, so it's not ruining

887
00:44:48,040 --> 00:44:50,120
Speaker 3: the surprise. But I did almost get him, like a

888
00:44:50,160 --> 00:44:55,400
Speaker 3: butchering class, and then I didn't get it because and

889
00:44:55,400 --> 00:44:58,279
Speaker 3: it was like, yeah, it was like how to how

890
00:44:58,320 --> 00:45:03,680
Speaker 3: to like butcher large slabs of meat, especially because David do.

891
00:45:03,640 --> 00:45:04,280
Speaker 1: The right cuts.

892
00:45:05,120 --> 00:45:08,480
Speaker 5: Then like although I feel like you'd be stressed out,

893
00:45:09,160 --> 00:45:11,480
Speaker 5: that would be extremely stressed, like you would.

894
00:45:11,360 --> 00:45:12,400
Speaker 1: Cut yourself or something.

895
00:45:13,040 --> 00:45:15,839
Speaker 3: What And I checked out on getting it because it's

896
00:45:15,880 --> 00:45:17,520
Speaker 3: all the way in Santa Monica, and I was like,

897
00:45:17,600 --> 00:45:22,080
Speaker 3: he's not gonna want to yeah, for a class, And

898
00:45:22,120 --> 00:45:23,920
Speaker 3: then I told him about it and he was like, no,

899
00:45:24,000 --> 00:45:26,120
Speaker 3: that sounds really fun. I would I would go, I'd

900
00:45:26,120 --> 00:45:27,680
Speaker 3: figure out a day and I was like, well, dang,

901
00:45:28,080 --> 00:45:33,600
Speaker 3: so A might just to get it for you anyway, Okay, okay.

902
00:45:34,719 --> 00:45:37,320
Speaker 5: Do you think that your love languages have kind of

903
00:45:37,400 --> 00:45:39,000
Speaker 5: changed since you got together?

904
00:45:41,640 --> 00:45:45,399
Speaker 3: Yes, I think I've always been a quality time type

905
00:45:45,400 --> 00:45:48,560
Speaker 3: of person, more or less like maybe that one's mood,

906
00:45:48,680 --> 00:45:51,600
Speaker 3: you know, been number one at times, been number two

907
00:45:51,600 --> 00:45:54,480
Speaker 3: at times. But I think since having kids, and I

908
00:45:54,480 --> 00:45:59,360
Speaker 3: always say, this feels like the busiest time of our lives,

909
00:46:00,000 --> 00:46:03,160
Speaker 3: like we've never been this busy between kids and work

910
00:46:03,280 --> 00:46:07,640
Speaker 3: and travel and everything, shooting out of town and like

911
00:46:07,760 --> 00:46:10,719
Speaker 3: managing all that, like it's just never this is the

912
00:46:10,719 --> 00:46:12,920
Speaker 3: first time our life has sort of looked like this.

913
00:46:14,760 --> 00:46:18,520
Speaker 3: So to me, I think quality times become bigger because

914
00:46:18,560 --> 00:46:23,080
Speaker 3: it's become the thing that's been the hardest to find

915
00:46:23,080 --> 00:46:27,880
Speaker 3: time for m hm, so it feels bigger, yeah, you know,

916
00:46:28,280 --> 00:46:29,960
Speaker 3: whereas like when I was younger, it might have been

917
00:46:29,960 --> 00:46:33,960
Speaker 3: more like words of affirmation or just like you know, yeah,

918
00:46:34,000 --> 00:46:37,000
Speaker 3: like other things felt as meaningful, and I'm like, I

919
00:46:37,040 --> 00:46:37,480
Speaker 3: want you to just.

920
00:46:37,400 --> 00:46:38,719
Speaker 1: Shit with me. I just want to hang out with you.

921
00:46:39,520 --> 00:46:47,080
Speaker 5: Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, I've gotten I have been frustrated

922
00:46:47,120 --> 00:46:49,799
Speaker 5: sometimes because I feel like I just want to be

923
00:46:50,120 --> 00:46:52,280
Speaker 5: around you. I don't care about all this other stuff,

924
00:46:52,320 --> 00:46:55,680
Speaker 5: like I don't like I appreciate again, like the laundry.

925
00:46:55,719 --> 00:46:57,920
Speaker 5: It's like I appreciate it, but like I don't care

926
00:46:57,960 --> 00:47:00,319
Speaker 5: about it, like I don't care if the one night

927
00:47:00,360 --> 00:47:02,239
Speaker 5: I think he was like, oh this is why I

928
00:47:02,239 --> 00:47:04,400
Speaker 5: got mad. I remember you were like cleaning the kitchen

929
00:47:04,520 --> 00:47:08,360
Speaker 5: and I was like, oh, yeah, I'm here, Like this

930
00:47:08,440 --> 00:47:10,560
Speaker 5: is the first time we've been together by ourselves all

931
00:47:10,640 --> 00:47:12,680
Speaker 5: day and you're like cleaning the kitchen and not looking

932
00:47:12,719 --> 00:47:15,880
Speaker 5: at me. And I talked about it in therapy and

933
00:47:16,160 --> 00:47:18,359
Speaker 5: really what it was. I just wanted to connect with him,

934
00:47:18,400 --> 00:47:21,520
Speaker 5: like really connect and I don't care that the kitchens.

935
00:47:21,640 --> 00:47:23,480
Speaker 5: I mean, for him, it's really important that the kitchen

936
00:47:23,520 --> 00:47:25,120
Speaker 5: is clean before he goes to bed, But for me,

937
00:47:25,360 --> 00:47:29,600
Speaker 5: in that moment, I didn't. But for me, in that moment,

938
00:47:29,719 --> 00:47:32,360
Speaker 5: I didn't care about that. I just wanted his presence,

939
00:47:32,520 --> 00:47:34,440
Speaker 5: like just for him to look at me and like

940
00:47:34,640 --> 00:47:38,319
Speaker 5: talk with me for a moment that wasn't Beth. And

941
00:47:38,360 --> 00:47:40,680
Speaker 5: then how much were you eating raws? And then like

942
00:47:41,360 --> 00:47:43,879
Speaker 5: bedtime and slather her with all the lotions and things

943
00:47:43,960 --> 00:47:45,520
Speaker 5: we have to do, and then put her to bed,

944
00:47:45,560 --> 00:47:48,000
Speaker 5: and then yeah, the dog out and then her maker

945
00:47:48,120 --> 00:47:50,000
Speaker 5: lunch for the next I was like, oh, I just

946
00:47:50,040 --> 00:47:53,400
Speaker 5: want you to be with me on the flip side now,

947
00:47:53,480 --> 00:47:59,600
Speaker 5: I do appreciate things. Liked the laundry, Like you know,

948
00:47:59,719 --> 00:48:02,320
Speaker 5: sometime was when you make my breakfast and I'm running

949
00:48:02,360 --> 00:48:04,120
Speaker 5: around like this morning, it was really nice when I

950
00:48:04,160 --> 00:48:06,640
Speaker 5: was like running late that he had put my coffee

951
00:48:06,640 --> 00:48:08,839
Speaker 5: and my keys and my phone all ready to go,

952
00:48:09,239 --> 00:48:10,200
Speaker 5: like I was.

953
00:48:10,239 --> 00:48:12,160
Speaker 1: Just there for me ready. I was like, I came

954
00:48:12,200 --> 00:48:13,520
Speaker 1: out of the bedroom, I was like, can you make

955
00:48:13,520 --> 00:48:15,520
Speaker 1: my coffee? And he was like, it's right here, it's

956
00:48:15,600 --> 00:48:19,120
Speaker 1: ready for you. And I was like, that's really nice,

957
00:48:19,200 --> 00:48:21,400
Speaker 1: thank you. And it was really nice.

958
00:48:21,440 --> 00:48:23,239
Speaker 5: And I appreciate those things in a way that like

959
00:48:24,040 --> 00:48:25,560
Speaker 5: I don't know that I would I would have been like,

960
00:48:25,600 --> 00:48:28,759
Speaker 5: oh cool, thanks, you know, but now I appreciate that

961
00:48:28,800 --> 00:48:31,279
Speaker 5: he's trying to tell me I love you and I

962
00:48:31,280 --> 00:48:32,520
Speaker 5: want your day to start off great.

963
00:48:33,400 --> 00:48:33,640
Speaker 1: Yeah.

964
00:48:33,760 --> 00:48:37,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think words of affirmation for me has developed

965
00:48:37,880 --> 00:48:42,280
Speaker 2: because I think I've had trouble like taking compliments, taking

966
00:48:42,719 --> 00:48:46,680
Speaker 2: that type of like stuff from people in my life.

967
00:48:47,000 --> 00:48:50,560
Speaker 2: So I think you've helped me kind of foster that

968
00:48:50,880 --> 00:48:56,200
Speaker 2: and like, like it feels better, and I don't feel like, well,

969
00:48:56,200 --> 00:48:58,640
Speaker 2: why is that? Like I don't know. I feel like

970
00:48:58,640 --> 00:49:00,759
Speaker 2: sometimes I have a tendency to be like, oh, it's

971
00:49:00,800 --> 00:49:03,719
Speaker 2: not that good, Like if you tell me that's that

972
00:49:04,160 --> 00:49:06,040
Speaker 2: X y Z is great, I have a tendency to

973
00:49:06,120 --> 00:49:08,359
Speaker 2: want to be like, it's not it's not as good

974
00:49:08,360 --> 00:49:11,080
Speaker 2: as you think. But now I'm like trying to just

975
00:49:11,160 --> 00:49:11,799
Speaker 2: kind of sit in it.

976
00:49:12,040 --> 00:49:12,600
Speaker 7: Accept it.

977
00:49:12,960 --> 00:49:14,719
Speaker 1: Yeah, accept it.

978
00:49:15,920 --> 00:49:20,440
Speaker 7: Feel more better. M What about me?

979
00:49:21,040 --> 00:49:23,560
Speaker 1: Have your Do you think your love languages have changed

980
00:49:23,560 --> 00:49:24,040
Speaker 1: over time?

981
00:49:24,560 --> 00:49:30,719
Speaker 7: Oh? Right, I don't think so. I mean I still.

982
00:49:32,520 --> 00:49:33,560
Speaker 1: David was meditating.

983
00:49:35,120 --> 00:49:37,800
Speaker 7: I was listening to your story and he was thinking

984
00:49:37,800 --> 00:49:38,200
Speaker 7: about the.

985
00:49:38,840 --> 00:49:43,360
Speaker 8: Thing about I was thinking about what you were saying

986
00:49:44,840 --> 00:49:49,200
Speaker 8: about how the compliment thing. It's always better when I

987
00:49:49,239 --> 00:49:53,400
Speaker 8: get compliments from her when I when when when she

988
00:49:53,640 --> 00:49:55,760
Speaker 8: reassures me of things when she sees it, I'm struggling

989
00:49:55,800 --> 00:49:57,520
Speaker 8: with something that she comes and she reassures me. It's

990
00:49:57,520 --> 00:50:02,759
Speaker 8: always always easier for me to accept then compliments from

991
00:50:02,880 --> 00:50:05,239
Speaker 8: anywhere else, Like, I don't I don't like them from

992
00:50:05,280 --> 00:50:06,960
Speaker 8: anywhere else that much, you know what I mean?

993
00:50:07,719 --> 00:50:10,960
Speaker 7: But I do like him from her, That's what I was.

994
00:50:11,040 --> 00:50:12,000
Speaker 7: That's where my mind was.

995
00:50:12,160 --> 00:50:12,560
Speaker 1: That's right.

996
00:50:14,360 --> 00:50:15,880
Speaker 7: But I think I'm the same I I have.

997
00:50:16,400 --> 00:50:19,439
Speaker 8: I think that I'm a doer and and and I'm

998
00:50:19,520 --> 00:50:21,160
Speaker 8: and I'm I'm mushy, right.

999
00:50:21,200 --> 00:50:24,440
Speaker 3: I mean I like to hug yeah, yeah, you do,

1000
00:50:25,000 --> 00:50:28,520
Speaker 3: yeah sweet, which is lovely, especially having boys, because he's

1001
00:50:28,560 --> 00:50:33,840
Speaker 3: turned our boys into big, big, physical, affectionate MUSHes.

1002
00:50:34,520 --> 00:50:37,160
Speaker 1: Yeah, which I think is really important for boys.

1003
00:50:37,200 --> 00:50:40,000
Speaker 3: And they get a majority of it from I mean,

1004
00:50:40,080 --> 00:50:43,000
Speaker 3: I am as well, but like he's on the he's

1005
00:50:43,000 --> 00:50:44,040
Speaker 3: on a higher level with it.

1006
00:50:44,080 --> 00:50:48,120
Speaker 1: I think, Yeah, it's really that's really nice.

1007
00:50:48,640 --> 00:50:51,399
Speaker 5: Meanwhile, sometimes when I'm walking uphill, I'm like, don't hold

1008
00:50:51,400 --> 00:50:56,520
Speaker 5: my hand. I need my own space. I can't I

1009
00:50:56,520 --> 00:50:57,760
Speaker 5: feel handle this moment.

1010
00:50:57,840 --> 00:50:58,719
Speaker 1: I concentrate.

1011
00:50:59,480 --> 00:50:59,600
Speaker 2: No.

1012
00:50:59,719 --> 00:51:01,759
Speaker 1: Same, I'm like, the kids touched me too much today

1013
00:51:01,760 --> 00:51:04,960
Speaker 1: I'm sorry. I love you. I can't not touch sometimes

1014
00:51:05,440 --> 00:51:08,399
Speaker 1: like today, it do be like that. It's real.

1015
00:51:08,800 --> 00:51:12,759
Speaker 5: Okay, So what's we learned today? What did what did

1016
00:51:12,800 --> 00:51:14,200
Speaker 5: you learn? What did you guys learn?

1017
00:51:15,960 --> 00:51:16,320
Speaker 2: David?

1018
00:51:18,719 --> 00:51:20,919
Speaker 7: I learned how you do this podcast? It's pretty cool.

1019
00:51:21,920 --> 00:51:25,400
Speaker 2: It's dope. It's dope in here. Okay, I like it.

1020
00:51:25,400 --> 00:51:27,440
Speaker 7: It's very cool. You guys get the help.

1021
00:51:28,280 --> 00:51:31,880
Speaker 1: Yeah. See, it's all cozy. It's fun. Yeah, very casual.

1022
00:51:32,120 --> 00:51:32,880
Speaker 1: He was nervous.

1023
00:51:33,080 --> 00:51:35,239
Speaker 7: I don't. I don't. I'm not good with interviews, man,

1024
00:51:35,400 --> 00:51:36,560
Speaker 7: I don't. I don't like being but this.

1025
00:51:36,560 --> 00:51:37,560
Speaker 1: Isn't an ever interview.

1026
00:51:37,600 --> 00:51:40,200
Speaker 7: We're just telling I know, but just what it feels like.

1027
00:51:40,640 --> 00:51:42,600
Speaker 7: I'm an actor. I've been there before.

1028
00:51:41,920 --> 00:51:51,919
Speaker 2: Sure, Sure, I woke up thinking about this. I was like, le's.

1029
00:51:51,600 --> 00:51:52,080
Speaker 6: Not gonna.

1030
00:51:54,160 --> 00:51:55,600
Speaker 7: I'm going to be on a podcast?

1031
00:51:55,880 --> 00:52:02,480
Speaker 5: Yeah yeah, ah what did you learn?

1032
00:52:02,719 --> 00:52:06,520
Speaker 2: Oh well, it's I mean, it's always nice to hear

1033
00:52:06,560 --> 00:52:10,839
Speaker 2: you say the things that you need, and it's reassuring

1034
00:52:10,880 --> 00:52:14,520
Speaker 2: to me and it helps me know that I got it.

1035
00:52:15,040 --> 00:52:17,360
Speaker 2: Got to keep working on it, you know. I think

1036
00:52:17,960 --> 00:52:21,439
Speaker 2: I think continuing to work on it is I didn't

1037
00:52:21,520 --> 00:52:25,680
Speaker 2: learn that today, but I think every time you say it.

1038
00:52:25,680 --> 00:52:30,120
Speaker 2: It ticks in my brain a little more, and like eventually,

1039
00:52:30,719 --> 00:52:35,000
Speaker 2: maybe maybe by year twenty, I'll be like, you know,

1040
00:52:35,200 --> 00:52:35,880
Speaker 2: really getting it.

1041
00:52:35,960 --> 00:52:37,719
Speaker 1: We can only hope.

1042
00:52:38,040 --> 00:52:39,960
Speaker 7: Yeah, we never really get it, man, we never really

1043
00:52:39,960 --> 00:52:41,000
Speaker 7: get it. It's constant work.

1044
00:52:41,120 --> 00:52:42,680
Speaker 8: I don't think that there's I don't think there's an

1045
00:52:42,719 --> 00:52:46,960
Speaker 8: answer of perfect solution for I want to be well.

1046
00:52:46,960 --> 00:52:49,759
Speaker 5: That's also the problem is that you're really hard on

1047
00:52:49,760 --> 00:52:51,600
Speaker 5: yourself when you're like, oh, I messed up.

1048
00:52:51,680 --> 00:52:54,239
Speaker 1: Brad always gets the most upset after we fight.

1049
00:52:54,480 --> 00:52:57,279
Speaker 5: Meanwhile, I'm like, oh, we we fought, we got it

1050
00:52:57,280 --> 00:52:59,799
Speaker 5: out and we talked about it's the same.

1051
00:53:00,040 --> 00:53:03,040
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, And he's like, Brad, I'm Brad, I get

1052
00:53:03,080 --> 00:53:03,720
Speaker 1: really upset.

1053
00:53:04,120 --> 00:53:05,480
Speaker 7: Well, like we did.

1054
00:53:05,760 --> 00:53:06,800
Speaker 6: We did a great job.

1055
00:53:08,000 --> 00:53:09,799
Speaker 1: Brad gets so upset. He's like, oh, I don't want

1056
00:53:09,800 --> 00:53:10,279
Speaker 1: to fight with you.

1057
00:53:10,320 --> 00:53:13,200
Speaker 5: I was like, what what are you talking about?

1058
00:53:13,239 --> 00:53:15,840
Speaker 1: We are going to fight. It will happen.

1059
00:53:16,239 --> 00:53:19,280
Speaker 5: We will miscommunicate with each other, we will accidentally get butter,

1060
00:53:19,480 --> 00:53:23,360
Speaker 5: we will you know, make something up or hear something wrong.

1061
00:53:23,880 --> 00:53:27,480
Speaker 5: So it's so important that we move through that stuff

1062
00:53:27,480 --> 00:53:34,799
Speaker 5: and not just pretend everything's okay.

1063
00:53:32,000 --> 00:53:34,360
Speaker 3: Right, because you have to the other to decide or

1064
00:53:34,400 --> 00:53:35,600
Speaker 3: that is ignoring it.

1065
00:53:35,760 --> 00:53:38,800
Speaker 1: We're like taking it under the rug. Or I'll never forget.

1066
00:53:38,800 --> 00:53:42,160
Speaker 3: There was this couple years and years ago that I

1067
00:53:42,239 --> 00:53:45,000
Speaker 3: knew through a friend and they were getting a divorce

1068
00:53:45,040 --> 00:53:46,239
Speaker 3: and it was kind of one of those couples. I

1069
00:53:46,239 --> 00:53:49,319
Speaker 3: didn't know them well, but I was surprised because they

1070
00:53:49,320 --> 00:53:51,440
Speaker 3: seem so happy that they were getting a divorce.

1071
00:53:52,040 --> 00:53:53,000
Speaker 1: And I asked my friend.

1072
00:53:53,040 --> 00:53:54,680
Speaker 3: I was like, my gosh, what happened, Like they seemed

1073
00:53:54,719 --> 00:53:56,600
Speaker 3: so happy and he was like, yeah, I felt the same.

1074
00:53:56,640 --> 00:53:59,880
Speaker 1: But then he said, we stopped watering our garden.

1075
00:54:01,360 --> 00:54:04,120
Speaker 3: And I thought that was like such a good metaphors

1076
00:54:04,320 --> 00:54:08,399
Speaker 3: or like devastating. He was like he was like, yeah,

1077
00:54:08,480 --> 00:54:11,520
Speaker 3: everything was fine, but we stopped watering the garden a

1078
00:54:11,560 --> 00:54:13,920
Speaker 3: long time ago. And it was like just all the

1079
00:54:14,000 --> 00:54:16,400
Speaker 3: little things, like if you think of tending to a garden,

1080
00:54:16,600 --> 00:54:19,640
Speaker 3: just like watering it and pruning it, all these little

1081
00:54:19,680 --> 00:54:23,600
Speaker 3: things are what make a garden like grow beautifully, and

1082
00:54:23,960 --> 00:54:26,040
Speaker 3: they just stopped doing all the little stuff.

1083
00:54:26,280 --> 00:54:30,040
Speaker 1: They stopped doing all little things, I mean water. I

1084
00:54:30,160 --> 00:54:30,960
Speaker 1: never forgot that.

1085
00:54:31,000 --> 00:54:34,360
Speaker 3: Why that one really stuck with me because you get

1086
00:54:34,360 --> 00:54:36,120
Speaker 3: even get busy, you can get in a routine, you

1087
00:54:36,160 --> 00:54:39,440
Speaker 3: can get in a rut and like it's important and

1088
00:54:39,600 --> 00:54:40,600
Speaker 3: so sad.

1089
00:54:42,560 --> 00:54:45,200
Speaker 1: To do the little things, to keep doing the little things.

1090
00:54:45,160 --> 00:54:47,200
Speaker 8: Little, and I think it's very important. If there's everything

1091
00:54:47,239 --> 00:54:50,040
Speaker 8: wrong on the other side, it's very important to deal

1092
00:54:50,080 --> 00:54:53,680
Speaker 8: with it, like, yes, let's help fix it, or let's

1093
00:54:53,719 --> 00:54:57,040
Speaker 8: help get through, but let's let's let's fix it for each.

1094
00:54:56,840 --> 00:54:59,560
Speaker 3: Other once we yeah, yeah, not let it fester, not

1095
00:54:59,680 --> 00:55:01,239
Speaker 3: like fessorable, and we don't.

1096
00:55:01,560 --> 00:55:04,880
Speaker 7: We get into a fight and we don't feel right.

1097
00:55:04,960 --> 00:55:06,560
Speaker 7: I don't feel right. I sleep bad.

1098
00:55:06,680 --> 00:55:07,960
Speaker 8: I mean, I think we might have gone to sleep

1099
00:55:08,000 --> 00:55:10,759
Speaker 8: once or twice without finishing it and coming to a

1100
00:55:11,600 --> 00:55:14,400
Speaker 8: to a solution, but you wake up the I also.

1101
00:55:14,239 --> 00:55:16,200
Speaker 3: Think it's okay to go to bed angry. Sometimes you

1102
00:55:16,320 --> 00:55:18,239
Speaker 3: need like a few hours.

1103
00:55:17,760 --> 00:55:20,480
Speaker 6: To sometimes the whole life you never go to bed.

1104
00:55:20,320 --> 00:55:22,200
Speaker 1: Angry is like bullshit advice.

1105
00:55:22,400 --> 00:55:24,320
Speaker 7: No, I sleep better when I don't go to bed angry.

1106
00:55:24,520 --> 00:55:27,520
Speaker 3: Yes, of course, But sometimes I think you need a

1107
00:55:27,520 --> 00:55:30,399
Speaker 3: little space to like process and you have a more

1108
00:55:30,400 --> 00:55:33,000
Speaker 3: constructive conversation the morning after.

1109
00:55:33,360 --> 00:55:37,040
Speaker 2: The tired brain trying to like rationalize an argument at

1110
00:55:37,160 --> 00:55:38,839
Speaker 2: eleven PM or later is like.

1111
00:55:40,120 --> 00:55:42,200
Speaker 1: Is maybe not the best time to be doing that?

1112
00:55:42,360 --> 00:55:44,759
Speaker 5: Yeah, when you have like two lasses of wine, You're

1113
00:55:44,800 --> 00:55:58,040
Speaker 5: like that, yeah.

1114
00:55:53,400 --> 00:55:59,799
Speaker 6: More better. No, so do you feel a little more

1115
00:55:59,840 --> 00:56:00,200
Speaker 6: beat better?

1116
00:56:00,400 --> 00:56:02,040
Speaker 5: Do you guys feel a little more better about your

1117
00:56:02,520 --> 00:56:04,200
Speaker 5: feel Podcasts.

1118
00:56:03,680 --> 00:56:07,239
Speaker 7: Interview Yeah, I too.

1119
00:56:07,640 --> 00:56:10,200
Speaker 3: This is a good reminder too of just like it's

1120
00:56:10,200 --> 00:56:13,360
Speaker 3: been I think years since we've talked about love languages

1121
00:56:13,480 --> 00:56:15,359
Speaker 3: or like how we give and receive love. And I

1122
00:56:15,400 --> 00:56:17,879
Speaker 3: was like, oh, it's it's a good it's a good

1123
00:56:17,960 --> 00:56:21,640
Speaker 3: like starting check in point, you know, yeah, or even

1124
00:56:21,719 --> 00:56:23,480
Speaker 3: just like how we ask like when do you feel

1125
00:56:23,480 --> 00:56:25,720
Speaker 3: most loved? I thought that was such a good question

1126
00:56:25,840 --> 00:56:31,680
Speaker 3: that I don't think we routinely or I've ever No.

1127
00:56:31,760 --> 00:56:41,919
Speaker 9: We haven't talked about that ask, but it's a good one.

1128
00:56:42,160 --> 00:56:45,080
Speaker 3: Couples out there, ask your partner how they feel most

1129
00:56:45,120 --> 00:56:45,719
Speaker 3: loved by you.

1130
00:56:45,840 --> 00:56:48,719
Speaker 1: It's a good one. And get ready to hear blowjob

1131
00:56:50,280 --> 00:56:51,200
Speaker 1: and then give a blowjob.

1132
00:56:52,200 --> 00:56:54,759
Speaker 6: Happy Valentine's Day, Heavy Valentine's Day.

1133
00:56:54,880 --> 00:56:57,359
Speaker 5: Sorry, if your kids are in the car, We'll see

1134
00:56:57,360 --> 00:56:57,960
Speaker 5: you next time.

1135
00:56:58,040 --> 00:57:02,080
Speaker 1: Bye, bye, more more better.

1136
00:57:02,520 --> 00:57:04,439
Speaker 5: Do you have something you'd like to be more better

1137
00:57:04,480 --> 00:57:05,800
Speaker 5: at that you want us to talk about in a

1138
00:57:05,800 --> 00:57:06,560
Speaker 5: future episode?

1139
00:57:06,640 --> 00:57:09,040
Speaker 3: Can you relate to our struggles or have you tried

1140
00:57:09,080 --> 00:57:10,160
Speaker 3: one of our tips and tricks.

1141
00:57:10,400 --> 00:57:13,359
Speaker 5: Shoot us your thoughts and ideas at Morebetter pod at

1142
00:57:13,360 --> 00:57:16,280
Speaker 5: gmail dot com and include a voice note if you

1143
00:57:16,280 --> 00:57:18,959
Speaker 5: want to be featured on the pod. Ooh, More Better

1144
00:57:19,000 --> 00:57:22,840
Speaker 5: with Stephanie Melissa is a production from Wvsound and iHeartMedia's

1145
00:57:22,880 --> 00:57:27,440
Speaker 5: Mikutura podcast network, hosted by me, Stephanie Beatrice, and Melissa Fumero.

1146
00:57:27,560 --> 00:57:28,960
Speaker 1: More Better is produced.

1147
00:57:28,560 --> 00:57:31,280
Speaker 5: By ISIS Madrid and Sophie Spencer Zabos.

1148
00:57:31,640 --> 00:57:35,840
Speaker 10: Our executive producers are Stephanie Beatrice, myself, Melissa Fumero, along

1149
00:57:35,880 --> 00:57:38,919
Speaker 10: with Wilmar Valderama and Leo Klem at w V Sound

1150
00:57:39,120 --> 00:57:42,600
Speaker 10: and ISIS Madrid. This episode was edited by ISIS Madrid

1151
00:57:42,640 --> 00:57:45,760
Speaker 10: and engineered by Sean Tracy and features original music by

1152
00:57:45,840 --> 00:57:48,560
Speaker 10: Madison Davenport and Heylo Boy. Our cover art is by

1153
00:57:48,640 --> 00:57:52,320
Speaker 10: vincent Remy's and photography by David Avalos. For more podcasts

1154
00:57:52,320 --> 00:57:55,960
Speaker 10: from iHeart, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever

1155
00:57:56,000 --> 00:57:57,240
Speaker 10: you listen to your favorite shows.

1156
00:57:57,600 --> 00:57:58,360
Speaker 6: See you next week.

1157
00:57:58,480 --> 00:58:08,720
Speaker 5: Suger us, Bye, yeah, yeah, Okay, Hollo Tokitomas mahor