Speaker 1: Hey everyone, I'm so excited because we're going to be
Speaker 1: adding a really special offering onto the back of my
Speaker 1: solo episodes on Fridays. The Daily Jay is a daily
Speaker 1: series on Calm and it's meant to inspire you while
Speaker 1: outlining tools and techniques to live a more mindful.
Speaker 2: Stress free life.
Speaker 1: We dive into a range of topics and the best
Speaker 1: part is each episode is only seven minutes long, so
Speaker 1: you can incorporate it into your schedule no matter how
Speaker 1: busy you are. As a dedicated part of the on
Speaker 1: Purpose community, I wanted to do something special for you
Speaker 1: this year, so I'll be playing a handpicked Daily Jay
Speaker 1: during each of my Friday podcasts. This week, we're talking
Speaker 1: about your habits and how to develop better daily routines.
Speaker 1: Of course, if you want to listen to The Daily
Speaker 1: Jay every day, you can subscribe to Calm, So go
Speaker 1: to calm dot com forward slash Jay for forty percent
Speaker 1: off your membership.
Speaker 3: Today, I would like to start off by asking you
Speaker 3: j about your journey.
Speaker 4: You were born in Great Britain, born and raised in London,
Speaker 4: and you were kind of leading in a certain kind
Speaker 4: of life that went in a certain kind of direction
Speaker 4: and then a transformation happened and you've decided to go
Speaker 4: on a spiritual journey for three years, if I'm not
Speaker 4: mistaken years.
Speaker 5: So maybe can you lead us through the whole process,
Speaker 5: because it's really interesting to hear.
Speaker 1: Yeah, for sure, And I agree with you perfectly that
Speaker 1: when we share our journeys, it's only to give voice
Speaker 1: to everyone else's journey. And I always think one day
Speaker 1: that everyone should try and write about their lives, not
Speaker 1: because they want to have a best selling book or
Speaker 1: they wanted to sell across the world, but when you
Speaker 1: write about your lives, your family learns about you. Sometimes
Speaker 1: I think my parents have been through so much, but
Speaker 1: I wish they wrote about it because I want to
Speaker 1: learn about them. So one of the things for me
Speaker 1: is I obviously are born and raised in London, and
Speaker 1: I grew up in a society where success and achievement
Speaker 1: were seen as the metric of growth, that was the
Speaker 1: metric of happiness. It was how successful were you, how
Speaker 1: much money did you make, what kind of job did
Speaker 1: you have, what status did you have. That's the kind
Speaker 1: of culture I grew up in and I often joked
Speaker 1: that growing up I had three options. I could either
Speaker 1: be a doctor, a lawyer, or a failure. Those were
Speaker 1: my three options. Because all my cousins and my family
Speaker 1: members were in medicine, they were pharmacists, they were in law,
Speaker 1: and so I grew up in that kind of culture
Speaker 1: and environment, and I saw myself as a young person
Speaker 1: always drawn to things like art and philosophy and psychology
Speaker 1: and the mind. Like I was fascinated by those things.
Speaker 1: I wasn't fascinated by science and math. I was more
Speaker 1: fascinated by history. And so I saw myself very early
Speaker 1: on being very different to the people around me. And
Speaker 1: I think that everyone who's listening right now, everyone can
Speaker 1: relate to that that maybe when you were growing up,
Speaker 1: there was something that was unique about you. There's something
Speaker 1: different about you, and there was a path that you
Speaker 1: were being encouraged to do. So at my time, when
Speaker 1: I was growing up in London, the number one career
Speaker 1: was to be an investment banker. Everyone was aspiring to
Speaker 1: be an investment banker. This is before the crash, the
Speaker 1: Lehman Brothers and the recession in two thousand and seven,
Speaker 1: so this is before that, and so everyone in my circle,
Speaker 1: whenever we talk about someone in family, especially in the
Speaker 1: Indian culture, it would be very much. Oh, he's an
Speaker 1: investment banker, he makes dismans money, et cetera, et cetera,
Speaker 1: et cetera. And I got to a point where I
Speaker 1: saw myself trying to move away from wanting to chase
Speaker 1: material success because I started looking around and I was
Speaker 1: seeing that people who had material success, even little amounts,
Speaker 1: they weren't necessarily happier than anyone else.
Speaker 2: Now, when I was eighteen, I used to.
Speaker 1: Go and hear a lot of celebri these athletes, influencers speak.
Speaker 2: And I would love to hear them speak.
Speaker 1: And this is why I love your story so much
Speaker 1: and why the podcast to me was so powerful, because
Speaker 1: what you've been through is just people can't imagine. Right,
Speaker 1: you think Odd Novak, he probably just trains. He was
Speaker 1: given this god given talent of being an amazing tennis player,
Speaker 1: and now he's famous and he's successful. It's like, but
Speaker 1: you grew up in one of the most troubled times,
Speaker 1: in one of the most troubled countries, and what you've
Speaker 1: seen and experience is like, no one would want to.
Speaker 2: Go through that.
Speaker 1: So for me, I was inspired by hearing these rags
Speaker 1: to riches stories I was always inspired by people who
Speaker 1: went from nothing to something, and I would go to
Speaker 1: hear them speak. And then once I was told that
Speaker 1: a monk had been invited to speak, and I was
Speaker 1: thinking to myself, who wants to learn from a monk?
Speaker 1: Like what am I going to learn from a monk?
Speaker 1: Like what does a monk know? They just went from
Speaker 1: nothing to nothing, Like, you know, what do they have
Speaker 1: to share? And I had all these judgmental thoughts about
Speaker 1: monks and spirituality and religion, and I was just like, well,
Speaker 1: what do they know? Like what have they achieved in
Speaker 1: the world? And anyway, my friends forced me, and I
Speaker 1: said to them, I'll only go if we go to
Speaker 1: a bar afterwards, Right, if we go to a bar
Speaker 1: or a club afterwards, I'll come listen to whatever this
Speaker 1: guy has to say and then we'll go and have fun.
Speaker 1: And so I went to this event. And it's funny
Speaker 1: that the best moments of your life are also the
Speaker 1: most humbling, because I was blown away when I heard
Speaker 1: this monk speak. And the reason I was blown away
Speaker 1: is because he very clearly said that the greatest goal
Speaker 1: in life is to use your talents and gifts to
Speaker 1: serve the world. He said, people think that their greatest
Speaker 1: goal in life is to use their talents and gifts
Speaker 1: to become successful. He said, no, it's actually to become
Speaker 1: a server of other people. And I'm eighteen years old
Speaker 1: and I'm thinking, Wow, that's really powerful. And I thought
Speaker 1: about this when I was eighteen, and you can think
Speaker 1: about this when you're listening and watching right now. When
Speaker 1: I was eighteen, I'd met people who are rich, I'd
Speaker 1: met people who are beautiful. I'd met people who are famous.
Speaker 1: I'd met people who are talented, but I don't think
Speaker 1: i'd met anyone who is truly happy.
Speaker 2: And he was happy.
Speaker 1: He had that, he had that calmness, he had that gentleness,
Speaker 1: he had that happiness around him. And at eighteen, I
Speaker 1: was like, that's what I want. I want that. I
Speaker 1: want to feel like that. And so I spent all
Speaker 1: my summer vacations. Half of them I would intern at
Speaker 1: a corporate institution.
Speaker 2: I would work in the city of London.
Speaker 1: I'd wear my suits, would hang out in steakhouses, would
Speaker 1: go to bars. I'd be number crunching away doing financial work.
Speaker 1: And then the other half of my summer vacations I
Speaker 1: would spend living with him. In India as a month,
Speaker 1: and then when I graduated, I decided that I preferred
Speaker 1: the monk life to the management and their business life,
Speaker 1: and so I chose to go off and do that
Speaker 1: as a real month for three years. And so for me,
Speaker 1: it wasn't about me being spiritual. It wasn't about me
Speaker 1: being deep or inquisitive or religious. I wasn't any of
Speaker 1: those things. But I knew very early on that I
Speaker 1: wanted meaning, passion, and purpose in my life more than
Speaker 1: the other stuff, and that the other stuff is not
Speaker 1: that it's not important, it's that it didn't have meaning
Speaker 1: without this thing. And this monk really showed me that.
Speaker 1: So that's kind of like the first part of my
Speaker 1: life and my journey. I hope I didn't talk for
Speaker 1: too long, but thank you.
Speaker 5: For sharing that. That was really, really wonderful. Wanted to
Speaker 5: ask you what made you.
Speaker 4: Do that step and make that decision to go to
Speaker 4: the month life like you were doing that kind of
Speaker 4: like half half in a way, kind of testing it out.
Speaker 4: For what attracted you to monk life more than sort
Speaker 4: of say modern contemporary life that we have in the cities.
Speaker 1: I think it was the belief that if I was
Speaker 1: really going to master my mind. If I was really
Speaker 1: going to overcome my ego, if I was really going
Speaker 1: to work on self mastery, the self mastery project, if
Speaker 1: I was really going to master myself, it couldn't be
Speaker 1: a part time job. It couldn't be a weekends thing.
Speaker 1: It couldn't be like, I'll do it tomorrow evening. It
Speaker 1: had to be a real commitment, because I could very
Speaker 1: clearly see that I and I still have right. I've
Speaker 1: not overcome my ego. I'm still working on self mastery.
Speaker 1: It's not like it was all solved, but I knew
Speaker 1: that if I was going to accelerate that journey, it
Speaker 1: required a concentrated approach. Just like in tennis, like you know,
Speaker 1: you know that you don't become the best tennis player
Speaker 1: in the world by playing on Saturday afternoon, And it's
Speaker 1: the same thing with self mastery. You don't master the
Speaker 1: mind by practicing on Sunday morning. You have to make
Speaker 1: it a lifestyle. So that was one thing. The second
Speaker 1: thing was that I realized I really wanted to serve
Speaker 1: and give back, and I loved that the monks I
Speaker 1: was living with were feeding and diush to being kids,
Speaker 1: to just being food, sorry to kids on the streets
Speaker 1: of India. They were building schools and villages to provide
Speaker 1: this ecosystem for people to live better lives. And I
Speaker 1: got so moved by wanting to do service. And I
Speaker 1: was thinking, that's what I want to do full time.
Speaker 1: I want to do service and and and to be honest,
Speaker 1: I always had a few relationships that didn't work out.
Speaker 1: So I was like, maybe this is going to be easier. Yeah,
Speaker 1: maybe becoming a monk is going to be easier than time. Yeah, yeah, exactly,
Speaker 1: some breakup healing time because I kept going through so
Speaker 1: many failed relationships.
Speaker 2: So that was definitely a part of it as well wonderful.
Speaker 4: And so when you were there going through your transformational
Speaker 4: spiritual journey, when did you come to realization what will
Speaker 4: your life look like post being a monk?
Speaker 1: Like?
Speaker 4: Did you when did you feel that you will come
Speaker 4: back to say normal life whatever whatever that is? UH
Speaker 4: going to to coming two states and and uh and
Speaker 4: starting what you started. Now you have your videos have
Speaker 4: been watched more than more than billion times. You've been
Speaker 4: chosen in the thirty under thirty in Forbes most influential People.
Speaker 4: I mean, you are motivational, speaker to millions and millions
Speaker 4: of people around the world. I mean, how did this
Speaker 4: come about? I mean you you literally created that from scratch.
Speaker 4: I think that there is something very very powerful in that,
Speaker 4: and I always love hearing about these stories and journeys
Speaker 4: that have been built from the foundation up all the way.
Speaker 5: You haven't inherited anything.
Speaker 4: You created something that when you were eighteen or nineteen,
Speaker 4: when you moved to to you know, pursue your spiritual journey,
Speaker 4: you didn't know what that's going to look like.
Speaker 5: So how did that all share?
Speaker 2: Great question? Yeah, great question.
Speaker 1: So one of the first things I'd say is that
Speaker 1: I actually know that when I lived this a monk,
Speaker 1: I wanted to be a monk for the rest.
Speaker 2: Of my life.
Speaker 1: And that was genuinely like in my heart, I was like,
Speaker 1: I want to do this forever, and as a monk,
Speaker 1: one day I'll travel the world and I'll share this message.
Speaker 2: That was in my head. That was my belief because
Speaker 2: I was.
Speaker 1: Like, I'm gaining so much from this practice and this path,
Speaker 1: and then as a monk, I will travel and I
Speaker 1: will share these teachings. So I always had a desire
Speaker 1: to share these teachings, but I always thought I'd share
Speaker 1: them as a monk. Now, as my monk journey went on,
Speaker 1: I came to the realization that I didn't belong there.
Speaker 1: You see, this is the interesting thing. Monk life gives
Speaker 1: you more self awareness, and the painful thing about that
Speaker 1: self awareness is then you have to accept what you're not.
Speaker 1: You have to accept who you are and who you're
Speaker 1: becoming and what you're not. And I've realized that my
Speaker 1: desire to want to be out in the world and
Speaker 1: share this message and connect with people like yourself who
Speaker 1: are spreading spirituality even through tennis, like I had this
Speaker 1: desire and I knew that I had to fulfill that desire.
Speaker 1: And at the same time, without even saying this to
Speaker 1: my teachers and my mentors, they also said to me
Speaker 1: that we think you have a purpose beyond this space.
Speaker 1: And this is the powerful thing about mentors and coaches.
Speaker 1: And I know you have lots of mentors and coaches
Speaker 1: and guides. I'm a big proponent of two types of mentors.
Speaker 1: So in the Vaders, there's two types of mentors. It's
Speaker 1: called Vanni and Vapoo. Varni is the mentor that you
Speaker 1: learn from that you don't meet it's the mentor that
Speaker 1: you have through books, through podcasts, through listening, through teaching,
Speaker 1: through inspiration, and vapoo is the mentor that you actually
Speaker 1: meet and you know them and they know you. And
Speaker 1: so these two types of mentors are talked about, and
Speaker 1: I believe that you can be mentored by reading about
Speaker 1: someone's life even if you've never met them, and I
Speaker 1: can also be mentored directly.
Speaker 2: So mentors are really powerful.
Speaker 1: And my mentors, my monk mentors, they saw they were like, no,
Speaker 1: You've got a different path. So anyway, when I first
Speaker 1: moved back to London, I was around twenty five, twenty
Speaker 1: six years old. This was in twenty thirteen, and if
Speaker 1: I'm honest, I was in completely the lowest point in
Speaker 1: my life because I felt like I'd failed being a monk.
Speaker 1: So a lot of my friends were like, oh, yeah,
Speaker 1: you're back now. You didn't make it as a monk
Speaker 1: who fails at being a monk. A lot of my
Speaker 1: family was like, oh, what are you going to do now?
Speaker 1: You're not going to get a job. You haven't worked
Speaker 1: for three years. So I came back to all this
Speaker 1: negativity and I was feeling so judged that I'd failed
Speaker 1: in life, and I was feeling that myself, and that's
Speaker 1: when all my Monk training actually helped me, because at
Speaker 1: my lowest point, that's when the meditation, that's when the
Speaker 1: mindfulness and I know you've talked about this. When you're
Speaker 1: about to lose a game, that's when your you know,
Speaker 1: your mental mastery, your strategy, that's when it really kicks in.
Speaker 1: When you're down and you're about to lose that point,
Speaker 1: that's when you know, that's when your mind really kicks in.
Speaker 1: So that's how I felt that I was in this
Speaker 1: process and this part of my life. Now how it
Speaker 1: changed it is I always have this intention that I
Speaker 1: wanted to share it with the world, and in London,
Speaker 1: I was coaching companies, I was coaching individuals. I was
Speaker 1: sharing this in small groups, in small circles, sometimes for free,
Speaker 1: sometimes with work, sometimes corporate companies, and it was all growing.
Speaker 1: But I had this feeling inside myself that this knowledge
Speaker 1: is the property of everyone. I want everyone to have this,
Speaker 1: and we're not seeing it everywhere. Yet we're still seeing
Speaker 1: it in companies, we're seeing it in elite circles, but
Speaker 1: we're not seeing it everywhere. I was like that kid
Speaker 1: that's struggling with their mind. I want them to have.
Speaker 2: Access to it. And I thought, how do we do that?
Speaker 1: And I thought video and social media was a powerful
Speaker 1: way to reach people for free and to give them
Speaker 1: access to all of this. So anyway, in twenty twenty fifteen,
Speaker 1: end of twenty fifteen, me and my friend went out
Speaker 1: on the streets of London and we filmed four videos.
Speaker 1: And I had no strategy, I had no game plan.
Speaker 1: I just knew that I wanted to make videos that
Speaker 1: started a conversation. And we put out these videos and
Speaker 1: in three months, Arianna Huffington saw the videos and she
Speaker 1: became my first public so porter of the content I
Speaker 1: was making. And I'm very grateful to her for that.
Speaker 1: She saw my videos and she said we should share
Speaker 1: this on the Huffington Post page. And so she started
Speaker 1: sharing these videos on the Huffington Post page and the
Speaker 1: videos went viral overnight at that time, so they got,
Speaker 1: you know, tens of millions of views at that time.
Speaker 1: And for me, I was just making these videos in
Speaker 1: my bedroom. I would come home from my day job.
Speaker 1: I was working as a consultant at Accentsure. I would
Speaker 1: come home in the evening, I would edit for five
Speaker 1: hours a day, five days a week to make one
Speaker 1: five minute video. I taught myself how to do it,
Speaker 1: and so for me, it just completely transformed my life.
Speaker 1: And then from then on I got more focused and
Speaker 1: strategic about the fact that people wanted this even more,
Speaker 1: and I continue not only to make videos. We launched
Speaker 1: the podcast because I wanted conversations. So me and you
Speaker 1: had become friends and we'd been talking back and forth,
Speaker 1: and I was just like, wait a minute. Most people
Speaker 1: probably don't even know that Novak is so deep and
Speaker 1: spiritual and like focused on mastering. I was like, people
Speaker 1: should know this inspire them so much, because you inspire
Speaker 1: millions of people by being one of the most talented
Speaker 1: players of all time. So people are like, yeah, I
Speaker 1: want to learn from him. And then when I interviewed you,
Speaker 1: people got to see, oh, wow, Novak is so much
Speaker 1: more than a tennis player. And I was like, ah,
Speaker 1: this is what we need to show people. We're need
Speaker 1: to show people how powerful the people that they look
Speaker 1: up to are. And so you were you gave me
Speaker 1: You were one of my I think you were my
Speaker 1: second guests on the podcast, one of my first guests,
Speaker 1: and I'm so grateful to you because you gave me
Speaker 1: the opportunity to show people. And if you didn't say yes,
Speaker 1: maybe I would have had to wait. But you gave
Speaker 1: me the opportunity to show people that athletes are doing
Speaker 1: so much work in the background that people don't see.
Speaker 4: Absolutely and that and your podcast has reached one million
Speaker 4: views daily, uh and and I mean that's that's that's incredible.
Speaker 5: I mean, that's that's amazing.
Speaker 4: Uh And and you've had some uh, really inspiring people
Speaker 4: from various uh fields of life. And I remember that
Speaker 4: after you've interviewed me, you went to see Mario gets
Speaker 4: a football player from from Mario Is. We got in touch,
Speaker 4: you connected us and it was really interesting in my
Speaker 4: own world, in athletes world, to really connect with people
Speaker 4: that are like minded and like parted as well. Yeah,
Speaker 4: and your big, big, big, big big wave and hug
Speaker 4: to Mario. He is you know, as someone that is
Speaker 4: that is sharing that message, it's beautiful to see.
Speaker 5: You know.
Speaker 4: Lewis Hamilton is also someone that shares that message of
Speaker 4: of of you know, spirituality, being genuine, being kind, being
Speaker 4: aware and being mindful of of you know, how you
Speaker 4: how you how you live and that everything in your
Speaker 4: lifestyle effects not only your performance, your health, but just
Speaker 4: millions of people around the world that are following you.
Speaker 4: So you you do serve as a great example not
Speaker 4: only by performing well and by being a champion in
Speaker 4: your sport, but also you have an opportunity to spread
Speaker 4: the message and to spread the awareness about some really
Speaker 4: important things and some really noble things. When you see
Speaker 4: things from a larger perspective, it allows you to reflect
Speaker 4: on yourself and your life to understand that you know,
Speaker 4: we are all connected, and we are all dependent from
Speaker 4: one another. You know, we have our individual journeys, and
Speaker 4: of course we do care about ourselves and our closest people,
Speaker 4: our family the most. But at the same time, I
Speaker 4: feel like we need to be conscious of the effect
Speaker 4: that we have in our community and the community in
Speaker 4: our city and city, in our country.
Speaker 5: And it's all.
Speaker 4: It all travels very fast, so I think, especially nowadays
Speaker 4: with Internet and possibility to share the message through video,
Speaker 4: video blogs, video blogs, or or through through lives.
Speaker 5: Like this one and interviews or whatever.
Speaker 4: Instagram is a great platform where you can share your
Speaker 4: interest and your hobbies and your life and your philosophy
Speaker 4: through images, through photos, and and through colors, which I
Speaker 4: think is beautiful.
Speaker 5: So it'll you know, we have social media, we have
Speaker 5: Internet that allows us to express ourselves, you know.
Speaker 4: And I think that's that's a huge quantum leap forward
Speaker 4: for people to really connect even more, you know, in
Speaker 4: only a couple of decades, so you know, so so
Speaker 4: talking about that connection, I'm really interested when you came
Speaker 4: back to to to London and when you started, as
Speaker 4: you said, you know, doing training with corporations and some
Speaker 4: companies and.
Speaker 5: Stuff like this. When did you know that? When did
Speaker 5: you connect with your purpose of that you have today?
Speaker 4: When did you know that that's something that you definitely
Speaker 4: you know, it resonated strongly and you knew deep in
Speaker 4: your heart and in your mind that you're going to
Speaker 4: be where you are today.
Speaker 2: That's a great question, really really great question.
Speaker 1: And I'd say that I started teaching and sharing when
Speaker 1: I was eighteen years old, so straight after meeting the Monk,
Speaker 1: when I came back from my first trip to India,
Speaker 1: I set up a society at university called Think out Loud,
Speaker 1: and every single week I would discuss a new theme
Speaker 1: or topic just like this, and I would dissect it
Speaker 1: from a psychological, spiritual, scientific, and human behavior level and
Speaker 1: I would talk and when we started, we had like
Speaker 1: ten people coming every week, and when I finished university,
Speaker 1: we had one hundred people coming every week, and it
Speaker 1: was totally free. It was for students only, and it
Speaker 1: was just such a beautiful way to connect with people.
Speaker 1: And so when I started sharing again and I started
Speaker 1: to feel like this is just what I was born
Speaker 1: to do and meant to do, and I really felt
Speaker 1: it in my heart. The day it happened was I
Speaker 1: remember I sat down with one of my mentors and
Speaker 1: he said to me, he said, Jay, do you only
Speaker 1: want to do this if one day and he literally
Speaker 1: put it like this, he said, do you only want
Speaker 1: to do this if one day this is big and
Speaker 1: you're famous and you're known for it and it's huge.
Speaker 1: Or do you want to do this even if you
Speaker 1: can just make ends meet and live off it and
Speaker 1: do it? Do it just for yourself? And I said
Speaker 1: to him, I'll do it even for that second reason.
Speaker 1: I said to him, even if this doesn't go anywhere
Speaker 1: and it doesn't get big and it doesn't become huge
Speaker 1: or whatever, I will happily do it just because I
Speaker 1: get happiness from doing it and it seems to help
Speaker 1: a few people. And that was the moment I knew
Speaker 1: that this is what I wanted to do for the
Speaker 1: rest of my life because I got so much joy
Speaker 1: from it, I got so much gratitude from it, and
Speaker 1: the people that were listening and were come to the events,
Speaker 1: they were gaining so much from me, even if there
Speaker 1: were small groups of people. And then what happened is
Speaker 1: when I took my first leap, and I think everyone
Speaker 1: can relate to this. This is how life is. You're
Speaker 1: either just about to take a leap and a risk,
Speaker 1: or you've just taken one. And that's the kind of
Speaker 1: where all our challenges in life are. Either you're just
Speaker 1: about to take a risk and you're scared about that,
Speaker 1: or you've just taken a risk and now you're scared
Speaker 1: that you just took it. And so for me, I
Speaker 1: remember when I was taking this risk of quitting my
Speaker 1: full time corporate job to do what I do now.
Speaker 1: When I did that, and I saw every time I
Speaker 1: took a leap closer to what was my passion and
Speaker 1: my purpose. The world helped me and the universe helped me,
Speaker 1: and if you want to call it God, God help me.
Speaker 1: So what I saw was that there's a beautiful verse
Speaker 1: in the Vaders and it says when you protect your purpose,
Speaker 1: your purpose protects you. And I love that verse because
Speaker 1: it's so true that our purpose is like this rare
Speaker 1: jewel that everyone will tell you that it's worthless. Everyone
Speaker 1: tell you it doesn't matter, everyone tells you it doesn't count,
Speaker 1: everyone tells you it's not good enough, and therefore you
Speaker 1: have to protect it. And when you protect it, the
Speaker 1: universe protects you. And I feel every time I take
Speaker 1: a leap towards my purpose, and I have taken big
Speaker 1: leaps in my life, my purpose comes back and protects me.
Speaker 1: And that's when I got the confidence that this is
Speaker 1: what I'm really meant to do.
Speaker 2: Because I felt a.
Speaker 1: Lot of stuff, But when I saw momentum here, I
Speaker 1: was like, ah, this is interesting. I felt at so
Speaker 1: many things, this is actually going in the right direction.
Speaker 2: There's something here.
Speaker 4: Do you feel that the purpose is something that will
Speaker 4: help people and encourage them to make that leap and
Speaker 4: make that risk, And if so, how do we as
Speaker 4: people find the purpose?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah, really good.
Speaker 1: So the way I've been explaining it recently is that
Speaker 1: there's three aspects to purpose. There's interest, there's passion, and
Speaker 1: then there's purpose. Interest is like a baby. When the
Speaker 1: interest grows a little bit and it becomes a teenager,
Speaker 1: it's a passion, and then when it grows some more
Speaker 1: it becomes an adult, it's a purpose. So the seed
Speaker 1: of purpose is interest. The seed of purpose is the
Speaker 1: baby of just having interest in something. So it's not
Speaker 1: that you were as good as you are at tennis,
Speaker 1: and I'm sure, well, no, I'm interested.
Speaker 2: Do you think you love tennis more now or when
Speaker 2: you were a baby.
Speaker 4: That's that's amazing, by the way, It's an amazing analogy
Speaker 4: because it's so true because I can I can definitely
Speaker 4: identify my career and my journey with the analogy that
Speaker 4: you just presented. Because when I started dreaming about professional tennis,
Speaker 4: about winning Wimbledon, there's you know, the more was recognized
Speaker 4: ninest tournam in the world in the history of I sport.
Speaker 4: When I was a teenager, when I started to feel
Speaker 4: that I'm becoming strong enough to compete with professionals, I
Speaker 4: don't want to.
Speaker 5: Say the only thing, but.
Speaker 4: Probably most of my thinking and most of my visualization
Speaker 4: was going towards me winning the trophy, me accomplishing my
Speaker 4: goals and my dreams.
Speaker 5: Of my dream was.
Speaker 4: Becoming the number one player in the world and holding
Speaker 4: a Wimbledon trophy. And when I was seven, I was
Speaker 4: making this improvised you know, Wimbledon trophies from all these
Speaker 4: materials that I had, and looking myself in the mirror
Speaker 4: and saying, you're a Wimbledon champion one day I was seven.
Speaker 4: So I do believe I'm a strong proponent and supporter
Speaker 4: of dreams and chasing your dream and nothing. You know,
Speaker 4: everything is possible, nothing is impossible. And I felt it
Speaker 4: on my own skin. But going back to the to
Speaker 4: the interest, there's a baby of purpose. You're right, because
Speaker 4: for me it was about winning, winning, winning, So it
Speaker 4: was my self interest. It was my interest to accomplish
Speaker 4: my own dreams and my own goals and my own visions.
Speaker 5: Of course, with my parents that were there the biggest.
Speaker 4: Supporters and you know, very limited amount of people around
Speaker 4: me when I was growing up. But then obviously I
Speaker 4: start to feel that that's at the same time, it
Speaker 4: was always a passion and love because I really enjoyed
Speaker 4: playing tennis and for the sake of holding a recket
Speaker 4: in my hands and just being out there. I never
Speaker 4: had an issue of really hating tennis or you know,
Speaker 4: of course, we all have days where we feel less
Speaker 4: of doing something that is our love and passion. But
Speaker 4: I felt that the passion or desire was always there,
Speaker 4: and the flame was inside. The purpose for me was
Speaker 4: strongly related to that interest, right. And then going back
Speaker 4: to the beginning when you said, you know, when you
Speaker 4: listen to the monk speak about service as being the
Speaker 4: biggest priority and the biggest satisfaction, you know, and the
Speaker 4: biggest purpose in the life, that's something that I start
Speaker 4: to feel only later, kind of midway through my career,
Speaker 4: where I start to feel, okay, well this is yes,
Speaker 4: that's my purpose, but it kind of originates from the
Speaker 4: self interest. But now my purpose all of a sudden
Speaker 4: is changing form and now it's about service. And now
Speaker 4: I'm using the platform, of course, partly platform of playing tennis,
Speaker 4: I mean, still competing professionally, and because I see it
Speaker 4: as a platform where I'm able to grow, where I
Speaker 4: feel that, you know, all the suppressed programs, fears, emotions
Speaker 4: are surfacing like nowhere else in my life. So tennis
Speaker 4: scored for me is in a way a battlefield and
Speaker 4: and and a classroom. And at the same time, I
Speaker 4: do feel that the Tennis UH as a whole and
Speaker 4: as a platform allows me to share with people my
Speaker 4: passion these kind of things, you know, these kind of
Speaker 4: lives and and and and I try to always have
Speaker 4: in back of my mind the amount especially of young
Speaker 4: people that are following me, that are watching tennis and
Speaker 4: watching every athlete, because athletes are so blessed to have,
Speaker 4: you know, millions, if not billions of people around the
Speaker 4: world following them, idolizing them. And so I see, this
Speaker 4: is a great responsibility, if you know what I mean,
Speaker 4: Because purpose, purpose is a responsibility as well if it's
Speaker 4: if it's service, you know, but it's even if if
Speaker 4: even if it's interesting, it's still a responsibility the way
Speaker 4: I see it, because it is responsibility towards yourself. Yes,
Speaker 4: if the purpose originates from service, it's a responsibility towards yourself.
Speaker 5: And towards others.
Speaker 4: And that's when you fully completed this cycle, and that's
Speaker 4: where you feel abundance inside exactly.
Speaker 1: And that's why I respect you so much, because I
Speaker 1: know you called your book served to win, and you
Speaker 1: know that's beautiful. I love that on so many levels,
Speaker 1: and I think that that's such a great tennis analogy.
Speaker 1: But you know, and and I've see I've been on thankfully,
Speaker 1: I've been on the other side of yourselves, and I
Speaker 1: know what they and I know what they feel like.
Speaker 4: And I, by the way, go back to the videos
Speaker 4: that that we've done, Jay and I and with Lewis
Speaker 4: in Los Angeles, we played some tennis and Jay has attempted.
Speaker 5: To return my service. It was very very interested, it
Speaker 5: was very entertaining.
Speaker 2: It was we were we were showing.
Speaker 1: How it's good to always be a student again and
Speaker 1: that nobody was guiding us.
Speaker 2: But it's true, like serve to win.
Speaker 1: And I think that this is what I I've been
Speaker 1: saying a lot, and I repeat it often because it
Speaker 1: really helps crystallize. It is like your passion makes you happy,
Speaker 1: but when you use your passion in the service.
Speaker 2: Of others, it becomes a purpose.
Speaker 1: So what you're doing is you play tennis, and you're
Speaker 1: a tennis player, and that's amazing. But now because of
Speaker 1: the platform that you've gained through being the number one
Speaker 1: tennis player in the world, you're using that to serve
Speaker 1: and that's the whole goal that everyone can achieve. Whether
Speaker 1: you're a teacher, you're a doctor, you're a nurse, you're
Speaker 1: a you know, you're a football player, you make videos
Speaker 1: like me, whatever you do.
Speaker 2: All you have to do is Okay.
Speaker 1: Now that I've done this, how can I use what
Speaker 1: I have to help other people? And you will feel
Speaker 1: so much more happiness and joy from that. No matter
Speaker 1: how big or small, or successful or whatever you see
Speaker 1: yourself as when you start giving away what you have
Speaker 1: in the form of time, ideas, resources, money, energy. Remember
Speaker 1: it's energy, like time and money. It's all energy. That's
Speaker 1: what you're really giving. And when you give your energy
Speaker 1: to someone and especially your actual time and you want
Speaker 1: to see the work change, you'll feel so much more
Speaker 1: joy from that. I really believe that I used to
Speaker 1: take a lot of people and know back, I know
Speaker 1: we've talked about this. Before I started making videos, I
Speaker 1: used to take a lot of retreats to India where
Speaker 1: people could live where I lived as a monk, So
Speaker 1: I would take these retreats to the ashram. And I
Speaker 1: remember taking a man and he then took his children afterwards.
Speaker 1: He was a successful businessman in London. He took his
Speaker 1: children afterwards. They were about thirteen fourteen years old, and
Speaker 1: he said that it was the best trip ever for
Speaker 1: them because they were blown away by how grateful kids
Speaker 1: in India were with much less than they had in London.
Speaker 1: And he said that the perspective that they gained from
Speaker 1: serving these kids who are just grateful to have a
Speaker 1: bowl of food now, just to have hot food for
Speaker 1: these kids was like their birthday party. And when his
Speaker 1: kids saw that, they gained so much. And I really
Speaker 1: feel that the challenge here we have the challenges so
Speaker 1: many people have his mental health and that's that scientifically
Speaker 1: has been shown to be eased and healed when we
Speaker 1: help other people and when we serve other people as well.
Speaker 2: Not that it's the number one cure or anything.
Speaker 1: I'm not saying that, but I'm saying it is a
Speaker 1: method that can be very helpful when we're feeling pain
Speaker 1: to help others and to serve others, because it puts
Speaker 1: our challenges into perspective and it gives us so much
Speaker 1: more of a greater worldview.
Speaker 4: That's beautiful, And thank you for graciously mentioning my book,
Speaker 4: and you just publish your book. Think like a monk, right,
Speaker 4: can you maybe share, you know, with people something about
Speaker 4: you know, those those meditations that you've shared in the book.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Absolutely.
Speaker 5: So.
Speaker 2: The book's called Think like a Monk.
Speaker 1: And the reason why it'sooled Think like a Monk is
Speaker 1: because I don't think anyone needs to live like one
Speaker 1: to think like one. And I really believe that Novak
Speaker 1: thinks like a monk in some parts of his life.
Speaker 1: I think a lot of people I interview on my
Speaker 1: podcast already think like monks because the monk mindset has
Speaker 1: three key aspects to it. The first is monks always
Speaker 1: focus on the root of the issue. They always go
Speaker 1: to the core. They always go to the root. They
Speaker 1: don't worry about all the branches and the leaves. The
Speaker 1: second things that monks do is that everything is very intentional.
Speaker 1: Everything is very intentional. It's focused. It's not just by
Speaker 1: chance or by luck or by hope it happens. It's
Speaker 1: not hopeful, it's not lucky, it's not chance based. It's intentional.
Speaker 1: And people are very focused on their actions.
Speaker 2: And you know, you know this.
Speaker 1: You have an intentional diet, you have an intentional workout plan,
Speaker 1: and of course there's room for spontaneity. Of course, there's
Speaker 1: tons of room for creativity and spontaneity. But the real
Speaker 1: leaders know that routine gives birth.
Speaker 5: To real spontaneity. Right.
Speaker 1: It starts with discipline, and then the third and final
Speaker 1: part of thinking like a monk is being able. I
Speaker 1: think we need a world that is more compassionate, more empathetic,
Speaker 1: more mindful. And so these meditation practices that I share,
Speaker 1: I share three different types breath work, visualization, and mantra.
Speaker 1: And so these are the three main core forms of meditation. Breathwork,
Speaker 1: and I know you had Whim Hafon, who I'm a
Speaker 1: huge fan of, and Whim's fantastic and he's you know,
Speaker 1: he talks a lot about breathwork. Visualization, what Novak was
Speaker 1: saying he did earlier where he visualized himself winning the
Speaker 1: Wimbledon trophy. Visualization is an ancient form of transporting the mind.
Speaker 1: And there's studies now that show that virtual reality does
Speaker 1: the same thing to the body and the mind as
Speaker 1: the actual thing. So when you're standing on the edge
Speaker 1: of a cliff in virtual reality, your mind is having
Speaker 1: the same fear as when if you're actually standing on
Speaker 1: the edge of a cliff. So when you visualize something
Speaker 1: in your mind, it's actually real. If you visualize yourself
Speaker 1: at a beach, you feel the calm of the ocean.
Speaker 1: If you visualize yourself on a mountaintop, you'll feel the
Speaker 1: serenity of the peak. If you visualize yourself winning a trophy,
Speaker 1: working hard, focusing on the process, practicing, becoming better, you
Speaker 1: become better. If you can't hit a particular shot in
Speaker 1: real life, if you visualize it, you pay then actually
Speaker 1: be able to do it in real life because you've
Speaker 1: seen it. Everything that we see, whether it's your favorite
Speaker 1: car or whether it's a beautiful home, it existed in
Speaker 1: someone's mind before it existed in reality. So we have
Speaker 1: to realize that. So that's visualization. And the third and
Speaker 1: finalist sound and mantra. And the reason why sound is
Speaker 1: so powerful is sound transports us quicker. If you think
Speaker 1: about your favorite song from when you were a teenager
Speaker 1: or when you first fell in love. If you hear
Speaker 1: that song, you're back in that moment already, the blow,
Speaker 1: back in the flow, when you're hung that you want
Speaker 1: a trophy to or whatever it may be.
Speaker 2: You're back in the moment.
Speaker 1: So songs and music and mantra mantra is the repetition
Speaker 1: of a particular set of words, and that repetition can
Speaker 1: allow you to get back in the zone. And so
Speaker 1: after the tender Novak does this when he's about to
Speaker 1: play Tennisee is a mantra that he may repeat. I
Speaker 1: have manchos that I repeat before I go on stage.
Speaker 1: I have mantras that I repeat when I feel negative.
Speaker 1: These mantras change your mindset. So I share that.
Speaker 2: Do you want us to do one together? Novak? Would
Speaker 2: that be fun or not?
Speaker 5: Sure?
Speaker 2: Sure? Of course? Of course? Actually should we do it?
Speaker 2: Should we do it quick meditation together?
Speaker 5: Let's do it.
Speaker 2: Let's do a quick one, Okay, if you want to,
Speaker 2: we don't have to.
Speaker 5: No, no, No, it's absolutely fine. Love it.
Speaker 2: Okay, Okay, I'm just checking. I didn't know where you
Speaker 2: want to.
Speaker 4: If you want to, people would love to actually experience
Speaker 4: that live and what what that sounds like or what
Speaker 4: it looks like, what it feels like.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so we're gonna do a short one.
Speaker 5: Yes, can you hear the music?
Speaker 2: Novak? Tell me yes or no?
Speaker 1: Okay, So I'm gonna ask you all to close your eyes,
Speaker 1: and what I want you to do now is bring
Speaker 1: your awareness to calm, balance, ease, stillness, and peace. Whenever
Speaker 1: your mind wanders, just gently, in softly bring it back
Speaker 1: to calm, balance, ease, stillness, and peace. Place your left
Speaker 1: palm on your stomach, and as you breathe in, feel
Speaker 1: your stomach come out. And as you breathe out, feel
Speaker 1: your stomach going. As you breathe in, feel your stomach
Speaker 1: go out, And as you breathe out, feel your stomach going.
Speaker 2: Breathe in for account of the one to three four,
Speaker 2: and breathe out for account of one, two three four.
Speaker 6: Breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe thou, breathe in, breatheou.
Speaker 1: Allowing the one two three four to become your guide.
Speaker 1: And now repeat after me, I am grateful for and
Speaker 1: fill in the blanks whatever you're grateful for. It could
Speaker 1: be a person, a place, a project. See, we don't
Speaker 1: reflect on the good times as much as we reflect
Speaker 1: on the bad times. We remember the bad times more
Speaker 1: than the good times, because when we go through something bad,
Speaker 1: we cry for a month, but when we go for
Speaker 1: something good, we celebrate for a night. And so it's
Speaker 1: so important to deeply step back into a space of
Speaker 1: gratitude and you can visualize a moment in your life
Speaker 1: that you were extremely grateful. Visualize what could you see,
Speaker 1: who was around you, where were you, what was in
Speaker 1: the sky, what was on the ground, and what could
Speaker 1: you hear? Was it someone's voice, was it particular music?
Speaker 1: Was it the cheers? And what were you feeling at
Speaker 1: that time?
Speaker 2: The love? The joy?
Speaker 1: This time when you breathe in, breathe in all of
Speaker 1: that gratitude, that joy, and that kindness, and breathe out
Speaker 1: any negativity, stress or pressure. Literally step back into that
Speaker 1: moment and experience the gratitude in your heart. Extract it
Speaker 1: from that moment, take it all into your body and mind,
Speaker 1: and breathe out any stress or negativity. And when you're ready,
Speaker 1: in your own time, at your own pace, when you're ready,
Speaker 1: you can gently and softly open your eyes. So that
Speaker 1: was a very quick version. That was about three minutes.
Speaker 1: But you can see how we did all of them.
Speaker 1: We did breath work, we did visualization, and even mantra
Speaker 1: I am grateful for And you can see very quick
Speaker 1: clear how you can get into such a deep state.
Speaker 1: And if you think about our negative states, we don't
Speaker 1: even need to meditate. You're in a negative state. And
Speaker 1: so when we deeply connect with gratitude in this way
Speaker 1: through visualization, through all our senses, what can we hear,
Speaker 1: what can we see, what can we smell, what can
Speaker 1: we taste? Then gratitude becomes real, it becomes physical, and
Speaker 1: that's what we all need to do. So that's just
Speaker 1: a simple meditation. Thank you Novac for letting me share
Speaker 1: it much.
Speaker 5: Thank you so much.
Speaker 4: And it was very profound, and I just I think
Speaker 4: there's there's a lot of miss misinterpretation and misperception about
Speaker 4: what meditation is. And I think you you really beautifully
Speaker 4: broke it down in a simple way, you know, through
Speaker 4: you were guiding us through three steps. And I think,
Speaker 4: you know, there's you know, a lot of I guess
Speaker 4: parts of the world and different religions that think, well.
Speaker 7: Meditation belongs to you know, Hinduism or Buddhism, and it's
Speaker 7: not power of our religion and we should as such,
Speaker 7: we should refuse it. So so I think it was
Speaker 7: really interesting the way you've explained it and the way
Speaker 7: you've you've kind of tried to put it closer to
Speaker 7: to to a perception of the mind of really making
Speaker 7: it clear by the meditation is breathing. Meditation is prayer
Speaker 7: as well, because affirmations or mantras are prayer work. Yes,
Speaker 7: And visualization is something that you are doing in any
Speaker 7: religion and any part.
Speaker 4: Of the world because we all we all visualize ourselves
Speaker 4: being healthy, we all visualize ourselves achieving something in our life.
Speaker 5: And so meditation is everything.
Speaker 4: But meditation is mindfulness of being focused on that moment
Speaker 4: and being aware that you're breathing. Because bread, we talked
Speaker 4: about bread. I talked with Charvine actually about breath, and
Speaker 4: and it's it's such a it's such a powerful yet
Speaker 4: so underrated function.
Speaker 5: Right.
Speaker 4: We completely breathe once we stop breeding, we stopped living, rereading,
Speaker 4: So why should we all focus on that?
Speaker 5: I mean, what's what's the big deal about breeding? Right?
Speaker 5: But then you know, when you learn how to breathe consciously.
Speaker 5: Like I remember when.
Speaker 4: I was earlier in my career, when I was starting
Speaker 4: to compete on a professional level, I was struggling with
Speaker 4: allergies a lot as my nose was clogged up.
Speaker 5: I just I had.
Speaker 4: I had a lot of doctors look at it, and
Speaker 4: I even had some intervention on like one of the
Speaker 4: one of the like left.
Speaker 8: Side of the of the nose and trying to open
Speaker 8: it up, and and so many things were coming out,
Speaker 8: and then no one can really understand what is going
Speaker 8: to kept coming back.
Speaker 4: And so I did change my diet, which affected a
Speaker 4: bit in a great you know, in a great manner.
Speaker 4: But at the same time, I felt whenever I would
Speaker 4: get anxious on the court or feel too much pressure,
Speaker 4: it would start to happen again. I'd start to have
Speaker 4: this sensation of choking, of having lack of breath and
Speaker 4: so forth, which would then obviously completely jeopardize my physical
Speaker 4: state that I'm in, you know, I would feel tired,
Speaker 4: i would feel fatigued, especially if I'm playing on like
Speaker 4: really big heat like Australia for example.
Speaker 5: But when I started doing you know, yoga.
Speaker 4: Practice, and when I started doing conscious breathing, it helped
Speaker 4: me tremendously and it was so simple.
Speaker 5: And I.
Speaker 4: Encourage a lot of people that don't know where to
Speaker 4: start with all this, you know, like meditation, visualization, It
Speaker 4: might seem a little bit abstract, like start with conscious breathing,
Speaker 4: because and what you've done with us, You've led us
Speaker 4: through to counting the breaths right one, two, three, four, one, two, three, one, four,
Speaker 4: in four out and there are you know, millions of
Speaker 4: ways you can do that. And and but just simply
Speaker 4: starting to really be conscious of your breath, focusing maybe
Speaker 4: on the tip of your nose or something like that,
Speaker 4: or feeling the chair that you're sitting in. You know,
Speaker 4: then you're starting to train yourself to be more in
Speaker 4: the present moment.
Speaker 5: I think we we you.
Speaker 4: Know, as as as a professional athlete and being in
Speaker 4: an individual sport, I get to feel a really big
Speaker 4: leaps sort of say or or transformations of emotional.
Speaker 5: States very quickly. You know, I have no one really
Speaker 5: to rely on.
Speaker 4: So at times, you know, as confident I am in
Speaker 4: myself and comfortable in my own skin and being so experienced,
Speaker 4: sometimes I feel like, oh geez, you know, I wish
Speaker 4: there was maybe someone like I wish I had maybe
Speaker 4: another miner or two to sit down and like recollect
Speaker 4: before recover before I step out and compete. But you know,
Speaker 4: I don't, So I have to find a way. And
Speaker 4: the more I train myself to be mindful and to
Speaker 4: be present, the more I feel my breath and the
Speaker 4: more I'm recovering my energy, and as a result, the
Speaker 4: more I feel I'm performing better right because I'm more present,
Speaker 4: and I think a lot of a lot of people,
Speaker 4: including myself, you know, we we find ourselves, you know,
Speaker 4: spending so much energy and so much time thinking about
Speaker 4: what has happened and the events that we want to
Speaker 4: change or what will happen, trying to understand predict the future,
Speaker 4: or being afraid of something that it might be coming.
Speaker 5: So I think, you know, the only real moment we
Speaker 5: have is now.
Speaker 4: And you know, living in the present moment is a
Speaker 4: is a deep wisdom of every religion, you know, regardless
Speaker 4: of where you're coming from, what you're doing, whether you're
Speaker 4: doing meditation, where you're da, Buddhism, Christianity, mostly yours you,
Speaker 4: everyone understands that the power of being in this morning,
Speaker 4: power of being in the now, actually allows you to
Speaker 4: really fully manifest your own capabilities and to get the
Speaker 4: best out of yourself. So so that was very powerful, Jay,
Speaker 4: And I'm just going to go through some of the
Speaker 4: questions that people ask already, I'm going to go into
Speaker 4: one of the questions. So this is coming from the
Speaker 4: profile who Now Poorer hit seven ninety.
Speaker 5: Thank you for a question.
Speaker 4: Can you please share your thoughts and ask you, ask Jay,
Speaker 4: what is the end point of purpose?
Speaker 5: Of purpose? Okay, interesting question.
Speaker 1: So I always from the traditions that I've studied as
Speaker 1: opposed to just giving you my opinion, because I believe
Speaker 1: that people have explored happiness and meaning in purpose far
Speaker 1: longer than I have, quite frankly, and so from the
Speaker 1: traditions that I've studied, the answer is that anything that.
Speaker 2: Is truly.
Speaker 1: Beautiful, spiritual and powerful, it's always evolving. There is no
Speaker 1: end point. So you see that even in service, there's
Speaker 1: no end point. There's no point someone could say I've
Speaker 1: done enough for the world, right.
Speaker 2: You can't.
Speaker 1: Who could ever say that? You could never say I
Speaker 1: have now done the most I could possibly do. Right,
Speaker 1: So there is no end point of purpose. And it
Speaker 1: is our fascination and addiction to the end that stops
Speaker 1: us from starting. That's the issue that we have this
Speaker 1: big picture of like purpose is like this thing that's
Speaker 1: going to solve my whole life, and it's it's what
Speaker 1: I'm searching for. And that's why I said, no, just
Speaker 1: look for the interest. Start with the little baby footsteps
Speaker 1: of interest of the baby steps. And if you start
Speaker 1: with just to interest, it can naturally grow and continue
Speaker 1: to grow. So we get so fascinated by the end
Speaker 1: of stuff, but we don't start, and that's how we feel.
Speaker 1: We always say, oh, I'm never going to get to
Speaker 1: the end of that book, so I probably won't start it.
Speaker 1: I'll probably never get to the end, so I won't
Speaker 1: start it. So don't let the fascination with the end
Speaker 1: stop you from starting.
Speaker 4: Thank you for answering that, Jay, This is a question
Speaker 4: from the the Bather family.
Speaker 5: Thank you for a question.
Speaker 4: How much percentage of the tennis game you feel comes
Speaker 4: from the mental strength to win the game.
Speaker 5: So it's an interesting one if you don't mind, Jada.
Speaker 2: I think I think I should answer this. I think
Speaker 2: I should.
Speaker 4: I think I think it's a really really high percentage.
Speaker 4: I think mental aspect is the most important I guess
Speaker 4: aspect or element of winning tennis or anything in life really,
Speaker 4: because if you're telling yourself, I have not prepared well.
Speaker 4: If you allow your doubts be stronger than your convictions,
Speaker 4: be stronger than your confidence, than your self encouragement, then
Speaker 4: obviously that is exactly how you're going to feel. And
Speaker 4: Jay has wonderfully put you know, described the visualization and
Speaker 4: you know, it's scientifically proven that when you visualize something,
Speaker 4: and when you not only think something the thought, but
Speaker 4: when you actually feel it in your whole body, that's
Speaker 4: when the magic happens, in both good way or a
Speaker 4: bad way.
Speaker 5: So if you feel fear of being in a in.
Speaker 4: A center stage, or if you're afraid of your opponent's
Speaker 4: game and you have doubts that you can overplay him,
Speaker 4: and then you have doubts that even if you hit
Speaker 4: two thousand backhands and last two days, you still don't
Speaker 4: feel confident enough to go for that shot and you're
Speaker 4: questioning it. Of course your body and you know your
Speaker 4: whole being is going to react in a way that
Speaker 4: you are commanding it.
Speaker 5: So I do feel that the mental aspect is.
Speaker 4: The crucial, the you know, determinant of whether you're going
Speaker 4: to perform well and as a result, whether you're going
Speaker 4: to win or not. So, of course I'm not saying
Speaker 4: that it's all. I'm not taking one hundred percent of
Speaker 4: victory depending on the mental hospital because of course you
Speaker 4: have to train, you have to put in the work,
Speaker 4: you have to be disciplined, you have to understand.
Speaker 5: What serves you, what works for you in terms of training,
Speaker 5: the amount of training, the surrounding.
Speaker 4: That you have around you, the recovery routines, the daily routines,
Speaker 4: what puts you in the flow, right, so when you
Speaker 4: get on the court, you want to be in that flow.
Speaker 4: And of course there are some places in the world
Speaker 4: where I play where I feel more comfortable, some places
Speaker 4: where it maybe feel less comfortable. But in the end
Speaker 4: of the day, I try to train myself daily and
Speaker 4: put as much as work and I think value the
Speaker 4: mental training as much as I value my physical training.
Speaker 4: It's it's really really important, especially when you get to
Speaker 4: the highest level of professional competition.
Speaker 2: Great answer, man, really good answer. Thank you.
Speaker 4: So I'm just going to go into some of a
Speaker 4: few more questions Jay, thank you for of course.
Speaker 2: Man, it's great your audience asks a great question.
Speaker 5: Yes, thank you.
Speaker 4: This is a good question coming from a profile Rajan
Speaker 4: kp twenty three.
Speaker 5: How do you balance making a living and living your purpose?
Speaker 2: Yeah, good question.
Speaker 1: So the realist advice is there are certain people like
Speaker 1: Novak who knew very early on what he wanted to do.
Speaker 1: And I know this from the interview that we've done together,
Speaker 1: and he was very sure about it, and he was
Speaker 1: able to pursue it, and it was his passion and
Speaker 1: it's become a purpose.
Speaker 2: He's using his platform to serve others.
Speaker 1: Now, there are a group of people like that, And
Speaker 1: if you're asking this question at twenty, I'm guessing you're
Speaker 1: not one of those people. Because if you wanted to,
Speaker 1: you know, be in a certain career and be in
Speaker 1: a certain path, you start at an early age. I
Speaker 1: was late to the game, by the way, as well,
Speaker 1: Like I started the beginning of what I do now
Speaker 1: at age twenty eight. Like that's how old I was
Speaker 1: when I really started this from a career standpoint, even
Speaker 1: though I've been doing it for so longer before. And
Speaker 1: so if you're in that position, my advice to people
Speaker 1: is be in your day job.
Speaker 2: You don't need to quit your day job. You don't
Speaker 2: need to suddenly throw it away.
Speaker 1: Be there and learn everything you can from your day
Speaker 1: job that will probably be useful in the future for
Speaker 1: your passion and your purpose. And then at the same time,
Speaker 1: use your free time to invest in your PA And
Speaker 1: that's really the key as to whether you're truly passionate
Speaker 1: about it or not. So I used to finish work
Speaker 1: at my day job, my corporate day job at nine pm.
Speaker 1: Sometimes I'd get home and I'd work on my passion
Speaker 1: from nine pm till two am. And then on the weekend,
Speaker 1: guess what, I didn't go out and have a social life.
Speaker 1: I was working on my purpose. I was editing videos again,
Speaker 1: I was learning video editing, and I was starting the
Speaker 1: journey I am now. Even now, for the past few years,
Speaker 1: I put in more time into my purpose than I
Speaker 1: do into any other area of my life. You know,
Speaker 1: I was building my podcast. I wanted to interview Novak.
Speaker 1: He wasn't coming to the US. I flew out, you know,
Speaker 1: to meet him because a I was passionate about meeting
Speaker 1: him and learning from him, and I really wanted to
Speaker 1: interview him. And so you've got to go out and
Speaker 1: show that you care about your purpose. And so what
Speaker 1: it's going to require is you don't need to quit
Speaker 1: your day job. I would never recommend it to anyone.
Speaker 1: It's what you do with your free time. And what
Speaker 1: will happen at one point is you will see that
Speaker 1: your purpose is growing and you can then make the
Speaker 1: leap in a gentle and natural way, rather than just
Speaker 1: dropping everything and trying to make a leap and then
Speaker 1: it may affect your family. And I don't know what
Speaker 1: situation you're in, but I would always say to people
Speaker 1: that for some time you will have to have your
Speaker 1: feet in both boats and it's uncomfortable, but then you
Speaker 1: can make that leap over afterwards.
Speaker 5: That's beautiful. Thank you for your answer.
Speaker 2: Jay.
Speaker 4: The last question, actually I'm going to merge two questions
Speaker 4: in one okay related uh. One is from life Loving Chrissy,
Speaker 4: Thank you for a question what is depression truly? And
Speaker 4: the other question is from Aditamaniam. Thank you for a
Speaker 4: question how do you stay calm during the time of failure?
Speaker 5: And how do you how do you build your self belief?
Speaker 2: Mm? Wonderful. We should both answer them.
Speaker 1: You should answer them too, but yeah, because you can
Speaker 1: speak to the second one a lot. So when it
Speaker 1: comes to define, let's do the first question first, the
Speaker 1: defining depression. You know, I'm not a medical professional, so
Speaker 1: I always like to point that out that clinical depression
Speaker 1: is is different. But depression is generally experienced when you're
Speaker 1: having a long term feeling of being down, feeling stuck,
Speaker 1: feeling highly emotionally negative, and you feel like this overwhelming
Speaker 1: burden that's just surrounding you, and it seems that it's consistent.
Speaker 1: And that's usually how people express or experience depression when
Speaker 1: they feel a overwhelming sense of pain and heaviness in
Speaker 1: their life. And that may come from failures, it may
Speaker 1: come from rejection, it may come from parenting, it could
Speaker 1: come from so many different things. And depression truly is
Speaker 1: something that ultimately limits you from your potential.
Speaker 2: That's that's what it is.
Speaker 1: It's it's it's it's covering you away from what you're
Speaker 1: truly meant for. That's that's what when you say truly,
Speaker 1: like what is it? Truly, that's what it is. Truly,
Speaker 1: it's a covering that isn't you, that is stopping you
Speaker 1: from achieving your highest potential. It's real and people go
Speaker 1: through and that's why I'm saying that the clinical definition
Speaker 1: is very important and the way you deal with failure
Speaker 1: and overcoming failure.
Speaker 2: For me, these are the few things that I do.
Speaker 1: The first thing is I study the lives of people
Speaker 1: I admire. There is no one that I admire that
Speaker 1: hasn't failed, no one, if anything, that failed.
Speaker 2: More.
Speaker 1: If you haven't read Walter Isaacson's books on Steve Jobs
Speaker 1: on da Vinci on Einstein read them. Those guys have
Speaker 1: failed so many times. If you're inspired by Novak, which
Speaker 1: I'm sure you are because you follow him, he's failed
Speaker 1: so many times. And I can say that because I
Speaker 1: know he knows that, and that's what's got into where yes,
Speaker 1: today he's failed. There's that famous phrase of the master
Speaker 1: has failed more times than the student has tried. And
Speaker 1: that's what we have to realize in our own minds
Speaker 1: is that we will fail more.
Speaker 2: Actually, the higher.
Speaker 1: You go, the more you fail, because the more you
Speaker 1: try an experiment. So the first thing I remind myself
Speaker 1: is that all the people I respect have failed more
Speaker 1: than I've tried. There's the first thing. The second thing
Speaker 1: I do is I literally go, what is the feedback
Speaker 1: in this failure? What can I learn from this failure?
Speaker 1: Because this failure is a signal that I need to
Speaker 1: change something, that I need to learn, a new skill
Speaker 1: that I need to adapt.
Speaker 2: Failure is never just failure. It is a signal. It
Speaker 2: is a alert.
Speaker 1: It is a message to you, and often we want
Speaker 1: to ignore the message and just be emotional. It's important
Speaker 1: that we learn the message. And the third way that
Speaker 1: I deal with failure is I've said this to myself
Speaker 1: for a long time. It just makes the story better
Speaker 1: because one day, when you keep going and you win
Speaker 1: that trophy and you achieve that success and you get
Speaker 1: the recognition whatever you want, you tell your story and
Speaker 1: it will make the story better. No one wants to
Speaker 1: hear a story of someone who just won every stage
Speaker 1: in their life because it's not real. And so one
Speaker 1: day when you share your story in so many tough situations,
Speaker 1: and I used to look to my wife and I'll
Speaker 1: be like, this is going to make the story better
Speaker 1: one day when I get to tell it and it
Speaker 1: gives you that sense of confidence that you're on the
Speaker 1: right path.
Speaker 2: You're on the journey.
Speaker 5: That's that's beautiful. Jay, Thank you so much.
Speaker 4: And it's very clear and what you talked about last year,
Speaker 4: the story that you get to tell, I think that's
Speaker 4: very powerful because that relates to the purpose.
Speaker 5: But also that.
Speaker 4: Relates, I think to the whole set, which which you know,
Speaker 4: I think is equally.
Speaker 5: As important as.
Speaker 4: Being aligned with your purpose, meaning being aligned with your
Speaker 4: passion and doing what you truly love and that giving
Speaker 4: your joy and that entertaining you and giving you happiness
Speaker 4: while you're doing it, which is very important. So I
Speaker 4: feel like in the times of failure, it's always good
Speaker 4: to really ask yourself, why are you doing that?
Speaker 5: Why are you even in my case, playing tennis?
Speaker 4: What is the what what motivated you to play at
Speaker 4: the beginning?
Speaker 5: Why are you still playing it?
Speaker 4: And I think when you when you, that's that's why
Speaker 4: going back to the beginning of this conversation talking about
Speaker 4: the importance of setting the purpose and clear with the purpose,
Speaker 4: with intention, with the passion, with motivation. Uh, it's very
Speaker 4: important because in these times you will have answers to
Speaker 4: your egos questions, you know. And I think also what
Speaker 4: is important is going back to what I said about
Speaker 4: the short term and long term goals. It's very important
Speaker 4: because to set your goals because of clarity of clarity
Speaker 4: of thought, clarity of feeling, and energy, because you know
Speaker 4: where your attention goals, energy flows right. And if you
Speaker 4: are confused about your life, about what you're doing, why
Speaker 4: you're doing it, you know, am I doing it for
Speaker 4: for their motivations or the reasons that the material or
Speaker 4: less material? It's combining the two. If you don't clear
Speaker 4: that up yourself, no one else will. So you have
Speaker 4: to go deep inside yourself. Understand why you're playing. When
Speaker 4: you're playing, set your goals, give yourself clarity, and give
Speaker 4: yourself a route that will be you know, it will
Speaker 4: be a solid road that you will know that you're
Speaker 4: heading this direction.
Speaker 5: If you fail, it's.
Speaker 4: Normal, everyone fails, but it will be easier for you
Speaker 4: to recover once you know that your goal is there
Speaker 4: and you're headed towards it. And the last thing I
Speaker 4: would say is the importance of what Jay talked about
Speaker 4: is the mentorship you know, whether it's from people that
Speaker 4: you know or the people that you don't know, whether
Speaker 4: your acquaintance or not. There's so many inspiring people around
Speaker 4: the world that share their content, to share their wisdom,
Speaker 4: share their knowledge and passion online. You have so much material,
Speaker 4: so many books, so many you know, essays to read,
Speaker 4: so many wonderful videos to see, and you just need
Speaker 4: to You just need to first find an intention. You know,
Speaker 4: my intention is to be clear with myself what my
Speaker 4: goals are, what my purpose is. If I can't find it,
Speaker 4: I'll look for inspiration. I look for people that have
Speaker 4: found their purpose, that have gone through a huge transformation
Speaker 4: in life, like yourself. Jay, that you know you've had
Speaker 4: until you're eighteen nineteen one kind of life, then all
Speaker 4: of a sudden you have a different kind of life
Speaker 4: that got you to where you are. So these are
Speaker 4: examples and journeys that you can learn from. So so
Speaker 4: much so, I think environment is very important in the
Speaker 4: times when you're when you're when you're failing, when you're depressed,
Speaker 4: when you're not feeling good about yourself. Also question the environment.
Speaker 4: You know, who is surrounding you, what is what is
Speaker 4: the information that is being fed to you? Is it positive?
Speaker 4: Is it maybe less positive? Is it encouraging you or discouraging?
Speaker 4: Is it inspiring you or not? So much so, these
Speaker 4: kind of things are very very important to you know,
Speaker 4: to to have on your on your sort of say
Speaker 4: uh daily to do list, in a way, asking yourself questions,
Speaker 4: writing things down, and it's important there is with Shervin
Speaker 4: and I talked about the power and energy that is
Speaker 4: behind writing things down in your diary, taking a pen
Speaker 4: and writing things on the paper, not only when you're
Speaker 4: feeling great, but also when you're you know, feeling discouraged
Speaker 4: or depressed.
Speaker 5: And that's where you actually learn about yourself.
Speaker 4: That's where you can go dig dig deeper and really
Speaker 4: transform yourself, to to to to even a better version
Speaker 4: of yourself.
Speaker 5: Thank you so much, Jay, I really really appreciate your time.
Speaker 2: It's amazing.
Speaker 5: You know, I really appreciate it. I'm sorry if we
Speaker 5: took too much of me.
Speaker 2: No, no, don't say sorry.
Speaker 5: I really enjoyed it.
Speaker 2: This same me.
Speaker 1: Man, this is like hearing it's a conversation like this
Speaker 1: has been such a wonderful conversation because I think we're
Speaker 1: so aligned. We're so different in what we do, but
Speaker 1: we're so aligned in values and in our heart, and
Speaker 1: so when we get to talk like this and how
Speaker 1: much we care, it's it just comes out to No, man,
Speaker 1: don't apologize at all. This has been amazing. I loved
Speaker 1: every second of it, and I want to do more
Speaker 1: of this with you.
Speaker 5: Man. I'm excited.
Speaker 2: This is amazing for sure.
Speaker 5: What you're doing is truly inspiring.
Speaker 2: Jay.
Speaker 4: Thank you for sharing your wisdom with the world. Thank
Speaker 4: you for being here with us. Thank you, Thank you
Speaker 4: for your wife and your family. Thanks everyone. Thank you
Speaker 4: so much.
Speaker 2: Here's a tip for your herb garden.
Speaker 1: It may sound counterintuitive, but if you want to get
Speaker 1: the most out of your basil plant, you need to
Speaker 1: regularly trim its stem I know, I know.
Speaker 2: How does removing part of the plant make it grow?
Speaker 1: That's actually a long story, but trust me, proper pruning
Speaker 1: is a sure fire away to ensure your basil grows
Speaker 1: big and bushy, and the same principle can be applied
Speaker 1: to your life. The next seven minutes are all about you,
Speaker 1: what you focus on, and how to trim it down
Speaker 1: so you can thrive.
Speaker 2: I'm Ja Shetty. Welcome to the Daily Jay.
Speaker 1: Let's begin by focusing on three centering breaths inhaling.
Speaker 2: And exhaling, feeling your body rise now, feeling it ease,
Speaker 2: sharpening your mind, and zeroing in on this moment. Okay,
Speaker 2: story time. In nineteen ninety seven, Steve Jobs returned to
Speaker 2: run Apple after a decade away from the company. What
Speaker 2: he found was a business in disarray.
Speaker 1: Apple had become really bureaucratic, and he kept trying to
Speaker 1: satisfy the random whims of retailers, and so the company
Speaker 1: was left with a ridiculously large number of product lines,
Speaker 1: none of them were performing particularly well. As one company
Speaker 1: executive put it, Apple made tons of products, most of
Speaker 1: them crap done by deluded teams Jobs couldn't make sense
Speaker 1: of it all. He found himself asking which one would
Speaker 1: I tell my friend to buy.
Speaker 2: Finally, he decided enough was enough.
Speaker 1: He declared that the company was going to focus on
Speaker 1: two types of computers, desktop and portable, with one professional
Speaker 1: and one consumer version of each.
Speaker 2: Four great products. That's it. The room was stunned.
Speaker 1: For years, leadership had pushed for more product lines, not fewer,
Speaker 1: but that approach hadn't worked at all. In the year
Speaker 1: before Jobs took over, Apple lost more than one billion dollars.
Speaker 1: So even though the company's board was terrified of this
Speaker 1: new direction, they felt they had no choice but to
Speaker 1: trust him. The result, engineers and managers suddenly became focused.
Speaker 1: Their next desktop computer, the iMac, became the fastest selling
Speaker 1: computer in Apple's history. A year later, they reported a
Speaker 1: profit of over three hundred million dollars. Apple was saved,
Speaker 1: and you know where the company went from there. I
Speaker 1: love this story because it goes against the common mindset
Speaker 1: that all of us need to be able to do
Speaker 1: everything all time. It can feel like success only comes
Speaker 1: to the overachievers, the ones who can do it all. Certainly,
Speaker 1: society reinforces that message.
Speaker 2: Have a side hustle, a passion project, and a viral
Speaker 2: Instagram account to boot Now. I'm not saying you shouldn't
Speaker 2: have these things.
Speaker 1: Some people are able to balance multiple projects at once.
Speaker 2: Some even thrive that way.
Speaker 1: But when you're feeling stuck or strets, thin, or simply
Speaker 1: not your best, ask yourself, am I unfocused?
Speaker 2: What are my product lines?
Speaker 1: You may need to cut some things in order to
Speaker 1: build a more stable foundation.
Speaker 2: Don't worry.
Speaker 1: Cutting out a project today doesn't mean it's gone forever.
Speaker 1: Apple makes dozens of products now, many of them direct
Speaker 1: descendants of things that were acts in that meeting. But
Speaker 1: the company could only get to this point after sharpening
Speaker 1: its focus. And speaking of focus, let sharpen ours now
Speaker 1: with a short meditation, get comfortable wherever you are, relaxing
Speaker 1: your body and releasing a little tension.
Speaker 2: Now, bring your attention to your breath. Don't worry about
Speaker 2: controlling your breathing, Just notice its natural rhythm. Tune in
Speaker 2: to the flow. If your attention seems interested in following
Speaker 2: a train of thought or latching onto a feeling, just
Speaker 2: notice where it wants to go.
Speaker 1: And gently rest it back on your breath, Breathing in.
Speaker 2: And breathing out. We often forget that this present moment
Speaker 2: can be enough if we just let it. Let's open
Speaker 2: this up. Take a few moments to reflect on all
Speaker 2: the various projects in your life right now. I'm talking about.
Speaker 1: Work, hobbies, goals, relationships, whatever it may be.
Speaker 2: You can even make a little list in your mind.
Speaker 1: Is your quality of life or your quality of output
Speaker 1: suffering as a result?
Speaker 2: Are you spending time or resources on anything that doesn't
Speaker 2: align with your mission, vision or purpose? Now ask yourself
Speaker 2: which of these projects are essential, foundational, vital to your future?
Speaker 2: Could you consider slashing any of those product lines.
Speaker 1: Once you establish your foundation for success, there will always
Speaker 1: be room to build on that foundation. But as Stephen
Speaker 1: Covey famously said, the main thing is to keep the
Speaker 1: main thing the main thing.
Speaker 2: Thanks for joining me today. I'll see you tomorrow.