1 00:00:02,720 --> 00:00:05,880 Speaker 1: Hi. This is Laura Vandercamp. I'm a mother of five, 2 00:00:06,160 --> 00:00:10,200 Speaker 1: an author, journalist, and speaker. And this is Sarah hart Unger. 3 00:00:10,480 --> 00:00:13,480 Speaker 1: I'm a mother of three, a practicing physician and blogger. 4 00:00:13,480 --> 00:00:15,800 Speaker 1: On the side, we are two working parents who love 5 00:00:15,840 --> 00:00:19,320 Speaker 1: our careers and our families. Welcome to best of both worlds. 6 00:00:19,600 --> 00:00:22,400 Speaker 1: Here we talk about how real women manage work, family, 7 00:00:22,560 --> 00:00:25,800 Speaker 1: and time for fun, from figuring out childcare to mapping 8 00:00:25,800 --> 00:00:28,360 Speaker 1: out long term career goals. We want you to get 9 00:00:28,400 --> 00:00:34,000 Speaker 1: the most out of life. Welcome to best of both worlds. 10 00:00:34,120 --> 00:00:36,800 Speaker 1: This is Laura. This is episode one hundred and seventy four. 11 00:00:37,240 --> 00:00:40,280 Speaker 1: I'll be interviewing a Leah Kitwana, who is an engineer 12 00:00:40,360 --> 00:00:43,720 Speaker 1: turned entrepreneur. So fascinating career story there with some advice 13 00:00:43,760 --> 00:00:46,000 Speaker 1: for other people who are looking to go out on 14 00:00:46,080 --> 00:00:50,960 Speaker 1: their own. We've been making various big changes I let 15 00:00:51,000 --> 00:00:53,080 Speaker 1: people know on the blog. My big news is we 16 00:00:53,159 --> 00:00:56,440 Speaker 1: just bought a house, which seems like a lot of 17 00:00:56,440 --> 00:00:58,319 Speaker 1: people are doing with COVID. It turns out the real 18 00:00:58,400 --> 00:01:01,640 Speaker 1: estate market has been a high of late, as everyone 19 00:01:01,720 --> 00:01:06,399 Speaker 1: is playing musical houses, deciding that wherever they've been stuck 20 00:01:06,480 --> 00:01:09,800 Speaker 1: for the past nine months has somehow inadequate and moving 21 00:01:09,800 --> 00:01:12,600 Speaker 1: to a different place in our cases that we had 22 00:01:12,640 --> 00:01:15,600 Speaker 1: an extra kid versus how much space we have. But 23 00:01:16,040 --> 00:01:19,440 Speaker 1: you guys aren't moving anywhere anytime soon, right, Sarah, No, 24 00:01:19,640 --> 00:01:24,360 Speaker 1: although we could, yes, exactly. I want you to talk 25 00:01:24,440 --> 00:01:27,800 Speaker 1: more about your exciting house purchase and your plans for renovation, 26 00:01:28,880 --> 00:01:30,880 Speaker 1: and I'm super excited for you, but I admit I'm 27 00:01:30,920 --> 00:01:36,200 Speaker 1: not jealous. We continue to be renters ever since January 28 00:01:36,280 --> 00:01:40,080 Speaker 1: of twenty nineteen, I guess, and we sold our house 29 00:01:40,160 --> 00:01:43,039 Speaker 1: took a while in December of twenty nineteen, so now 30 00:01:43,080 --> 00:01:45,520 Speaker 1: this is our first full year we've spent not having 31 00:01:45,520 --> 00:01:49,520 Speaker 1: to deal with any kind of home ownership financial responsibilities, 32 00:01:49,600 --> 00:01:53,680 Speaker 1: mental responsibilities, and it's been really lovely. I have to say, 33 00:01:54,440 --> 00:01:56,880 Speaker 1: when you crunch the numbers, unless you plan on staying 34 00:01:56,920 --> 00:01:59,680 Speaker 1: somewhere a very very long time, there's not as much 35 00:02:00,280 --> 00:02:03,800 Speaker 1: financial advantage to owning as most people assume that there is. 36 00:02:03,920 --> 00:02:06,559 Speaker 1: Of course, that does vary based on the location where 37 00:02:06,560 --> 00:02:09,160 Speaker 1: you are and market appreciation, and if you happen to 38 00:02:09,200 --> 00:02:11,560 Speaker 1: luck out and buy into a market then then explodes, 39 00:02:11,600 --> 00:02:13,760 Speaker 1: then you're right. You could prove me completely wrong with 40 00:02:13,800 --> 00:02:16,880 Speaker 1: certain examples, but I know in our case, we had 41 00:02:17,280 --> 00:02:19,320 Speaker 1: two houses that we owned before, and neither of them 42 00:02:19,560 --> 00:02:22,760 Speaker 1: were beneficial from a financial standpoint, So that's where we 43 00:02:22,880 --> 00:02:24,639 Speaker 1: come from. And I guess I just want to mention 44 00:02:24,720 --> 00:02:27,480 Speaker 1: that we are really enjoying the rental lifestyle and have 45 00:02:27,560 --> 00:02:29,520 Speaker 1: no plans to change that, because I do feel like 46 00:02:29,560 --> 00:02:32,920 Speaker 1: we are outliers in that regard, and maybe we'll have 47 00:02:32,960 --> 00:02:35,880 Speaker 1: to do like a renting owning I don't know, some 48 00:02:36,000 --> 00:02:39,000 Speaker 1: kind of a real estate themed full episode at some point, 49 00:02:39,160 --> 00:02:41,720 Speaker 1: because there is a lot to unpack here. But meanwhile, 50 00:02:41,720 --> 00:02:43,160 Speaker 1: you're on the opposite side of the spectrum, and I 51 00:02:43,200 --> 00:02:45,359 Speaker 1: feel like you're more normal because I'm hearing a lot 52 00:02:45,400 --> 00:02:49,639 Speaker 1: of moves and I'm actually like enjoying looking at people's 53 00:02:49,680 --> 00:02:53,440 Speaker 1: renovation plans and tell everybody about, well, number one, what 54 00:02:53,600 --> 00:02:56,440 Speaker 1: motivated the move, what's going to be great about your 55 00:02:56,480 --> 00:02:58,720 Speaker 1: new place? And then maybe a little taste of some 56 00:02:58,760 --> 00:03:01,680 Speaker 1: of the renovation decisions you guys are making. Oh gosh, 57 00:03:01,680 --> 00:03:05,600 Speaker 1: there are so many renovation decisions. We've been spending all 58 00:03:05,680 --> 00:03:08,520 Speaker 1: kinds of time over there and meeting with contractors and 59 00:03:08,560 --> 00:03:12,040 Speaker 1: figuring out what we're going to do. But you know, basically, 60 00:03:12,320 --> 00:03:15,399 Speaker 1: our I mean, our house is not small our current one. 61 00:03:15,480 --> 00:03:17,400 Speaker 1: But on the other hand, we have a lot of people, 62 00:03:17,840 --> 00:03:22,440 Speaker 1: and so the baby is sleeping in the closet, Dashber 63 00:03:22,480 --> 00:03:26,200 Speaker 1: and Sam are sharing a room. You know, we could 64 00:03:26,240 --> 00:03:30,840 Speaker 1: make it work. We'd contemplated renovating the attic also to 65 00:03:30,880 --> 00:03:33,760 Speaker 1: add bedrooms, but as we were thinking about doing that, 66 00:03:33,760 --> 00:03:35,280 Speaker 1: we're like, well, let's, you know, look and see what's 67 00:03:35,280 --> 00:03:36,640 Speaker 1: on the market, because that would have been a very 68 00:03:36,680 --> 00:03:40,360 Speaker 1: expensive and you know, unhappy project too. It's like workmen 69 00:03:40,440 --> 00:03:43,080 Speaker 1: in our house for three months or something. So we 70 00:03:43,400 --> 00:03:47,240 Speaker 1: were looking, and a couple of years ago, an interesting 71 00:03:47,280 --> 00:03:49,480 Speaker 1: old house had come on the market near us that 72 00:03:49,560 --> 00:03:52,640 Speaker 1: needed a ton of work, and we hadn't gone for it, 73 00:03:52,880 --> 00:03:55,800 Speaker 1: and somebody else bought it and put it back on 74 00:03:55,840 --> 00:03:59,320 Speaker 1: the market with renovations for quite a bit more. And 75 00:03:59,360 --> 00:04:02,360 Speaker 1: somebody did, in fact buy it. We're like, oh, that's interesting, 76 00:04:02,560 --> 00:04:05,360 Speaker 1: you know, like not that we want to flip this house, 77 00:04:05,600 --> 00:04:10,200 Speaker 1: but just that you can often get a reasonable deal 78 00:04:10,480 --> 00:04:15,640 Speaker 1: on old homes because people are just so wigged out 79 00:04:15,720 --> 00:04:19,279 Speaker 1: by the renovation process. And since we had been through 80 00:04:19,440 --> 00:04:23,080 Speaker 1: the kitchen and master bathroom renovation process two two and 81 00:04:23,120 --> 00:04:27,360 Speaker 1: a half years ago, it seemed like we could probably 82 00:04:27,960 --> 00:04:30,320 Speaker 1: handle it. So we know, we were looking at a 83 00:04:30,360 --> 00:04:32,719 Speaker 1: lot of different houses. We looked at some brand new construction, 84 00:04:32,880 --> 00:04:36,560 Speaker 1: we looked at older houses. This this house, you know, 85 00:04:37,160 --> 00:04:42,960 Speaker 1: it's a project, but we could not have bought it new, 86 00:04:43,680 --> 00:04:46,640 Speaker 1: and in fact, it's just not this kind of house 87 00:04:46,720 --> 00:04:49,960 Speaker 1: is just not available new that it's a large it's 88 00:04:50,000 --> 00:04:53,760 Speaker 1: got lovely sort of older you know, millwork and stone. 89 00:04:54,040 --> 00:04:57,279 Speaker 1: It's on a good amount of land, like we have 90 00:04:57,360 --> 00:05:00,760 Speaker 1: a large yard, and it's on a a private road 91 00:05:00,800 --> 00:05:02,440 Speaker 1: so it's a lot quieter than where we are now. 92 00:05:02,640 --> 00:05:04,800 Speaker 1: So there's just all sorts of things that you know, 93 00:05:04,920 --> 00:05:06,560 Speaker 1: you you wouldn't be able to get this in a 94 00:05:06,600 --> 00:05:08,960 Speaker 1: new construction, So to get it, we have to get 95 00:05:08,960 --> 00:05:12,040 Speaker 1: it in an older house that needs to be renovated. 96 00:05:12,400 --> 00:05:14,480 Speaker 1: So that's just basically what we're doing. We're going to 97 00:05:14,720 --> 00:05:20,600 Speaker 1: put in a new kitchen, redo the master suite, we're 98 00:05:20,640 --> 00:05:24,039 Speaker 1: making some of these very there's some tiny rooms that 99 00:05:24,080 --> 00:05:27,880 Speaker 1: we're combining to make into a playroom. And then yeah, 100 00:05:27,880 --> 00:05:30,080 Speaker 1: then the non fun stuff like it needs a new roof, 101 00:05:31,279 --> 00:05:34,760 Speaker 1: so it needs a new HVAC sys. Yeah, so all 102 00:05:34,800 --> 00:05:38,720 Speaker 1: this stuff is like the un sexy part of home ownership. 103 00:05:38,760 --> 00:05:40,960 Speaker 1: But you know, you do have to put that stuff in. 104 00:05:41,560 --> 00:05:43,840 Speaker 1: But it's true that if you already have teams, because 105 00:05:43,880 --> 00:05:46,200 Speaker 1: you mentioned to our listeners, you're not moving very far 106 00:05:46,680 --> 00:05:50,080 Speaker 1: so same school district. And I'm assuming a lot of 107 00:05:50,120 --> 00:05:52,880 Speaker 1: your contractor teams and such contacts that you've already made 108 00:05:52,920 --> 00:05:56,400 Speaker 1: from your prior renovation you can reuse or we're using 109 00:05:56,440 --> 00:06:00,600 Speaker 1: a different one. But this is probably not and I 110 00:06:00,640 --> 00:06:02,440 Speaker 1: want to nobody ever, I don't know, they don't go 111 00:06:02,600 --> 00:06:04,960 Speaker 1: back to usually, although I really like this, this new 112 00:06:05,200 --> 00:06:07,560 Speaker 1: team that we've got in place. But yeah, it's it's 113 00:06:07,600 --> 00:06:10,279 Speaker 1: exciting and and it'll be a lot of work over 114 00:06:10,320 --> 00:06:12,719 Speaker 1: the next six months or so, but then hopefully we'll 115 00:06:12,720 --> 00:06:16,440 Speaker 1: be in and there for you know, our house for 116 00:06:16,560 --> 00:06:19,320 Speaker 1: a long long time and treated as more of a 117 00:06:19,760 --> 00:06:22,720 Speaker 1: I don't know, the family compound or something. That's what 118 00:06:22,760 --> 00:06:24,559 Speaker 1: I wrote to you, Is this your forever home? Because 119 00:06:24,560 --> 00:06:28,240 Speaker 1: I actually, like, I don't really have a family commune 120 00:06:28,400 --> 00:06:31,520 Speaker 1: compound dream, but I know it's very very common to 121 00:06:31,520 --> 00:06:35,760 Speaker 1: have one. Yeah, And I mean I could see families coming, 122 00:06:35,839 --> 00:06:38,120 Speaker 1: you know, my five children coming back with their families 123 00:06:38,120 --> 00:06:41,640 Speaker 1: and having this you know place that's got the big yard, 124 00:06:41,720 --> 00:06:44,920 Speaker 1: that's you know, got space for them is you know, appealing, 125 00:06:45,440 --> 00:06:49,120 Speaker 1: and we weren't going to buy. Uh. We we had 126 00:06:49,160 --> 00:06:51,159 Speaker 1: thought at various first because we would go to this 127 00:06:51,200 --> 00:06:53,600 Speaker 1: one beach town every summer and we're like, oh, well, 128 00:06:53,600 --> 00:06:55,359 Speaker 1: should we you know, get a place there, like me, no, No, 129 00:06:55,400 --> 00:06:56,640 Speaker 1: we don't want to do that, Like we don't want 130 00:06:56,680 --> 00:06:59,719 Speaker 1: to be on the landlord side of things, for instance, 131 00:07:00,400 --> 00:07:02,760 Speaker 1: you know, renting it out and then if you're not there, 132 00:07:02,920 --> 00:07:05,080 Speaker 1: like I don't feel like spending three months there every 133 00:07:05,160 --> 00:07:06,640 Speaker 1: year or something, which is what you'd have to do 134 00:07:06,680 --> 00:07:09,200 Speaker 1: to kind of make it worthwhile. So we weren't going 135 00:07:09,279 --> 00:07:11,240 Speaker 1: to do that. So we're like, well, okay, let's focus 136 00:07:11,320 --> 00:07:17,240 Speaker 1: more on the core home and make that nice and 137 00:07:17,280 --> 00:07:21,200 Speaker 1: then you know, not just go wherever in terms of vacation. 138 00:07:21,320 --> 00:07:23,360 Speaker 1: So yeah, it's exciting. It's a lot of work, but 139 00:07:23,360 --> 00:07:27,600 Speaker 1: it's exciting. I love it. Well. I am excited to 140 00:07:28,120 --> 00:07:30,280 Speaker 1: listen to the segment. I admit, as it's airing, I 141 00:07:30,320 --> 00:07:31,960 Speaker 1: haven't listened to it yet, but I will get to 142 00:07:32,120 --> 00:07:33,720 Speaker 1: listen to it live because this is one of the 143 00:07:33,840 --> 00:07:37,200 Speaker 1: rare interviews that Laura has recorded without me. We may 144 00:07:37,200 --> 00:07:38,600 Speaker 1: be doing a little bit more of this in the 145 00:07:38,600 --> 00:07:40,559 Speaker 1: months to come. Just because we find that the flow 146 00:07:40,600 --> 00:07:43,640 Speaker 1: of interview with two people tends to work really nicely. 147 00:07:43,720 --> 00:07:46,480 Speaker 1: It's conversational, and then we should get the treat of 148 00:07:46,520 --> 00:07:49,280 Speaker 1: listening to each other's content as it airs, which is good. 149 00:07:49,600 --> 00:07:52,920 Speaker 1: All right, So here we go. Well, Sarah and I 150 00:07:53,000 --> 00:07:57,320 Speaker 1: are delighted to welcome Aliyah Kitwana to the program. Sarah 151 00:07:57,480 --> 00:08:00,680 Speaker 1: could not be here she's doing residency interviews day, but 152 00:08:00,880 --> 00:08:03,640 Speaker 1: I am excited about this. So Alia, can you introduce 153 00:08:03,680 --> 00:08:07,600 Speaker 1: yourself to our listeners? Hi, my name is Aliyah Kitwana. 154 00:08:07,760 --> 00:08:10,960 Speaker 1: I am the owner and founder of Little Black Buddha, 155 00:08:11,000 --> 00:08:15,800 Speaker 1: which is a career services and software development company. And 156 00:08:16,200 --> 00:08:19,720 Speaker 1: you have three kids, right I do. I have a 157 00:08:19,760 --> 00:08:22,760 Speaker 1: twelve year old, a nine year old and a four 158 00:08:22,840 --> 00:08:26,200 Speaker 1: year old, so two girls and a little boy. Yeah, 159 00:08:26,680 --> 00:08:32,640 Speaker 1: And Aliyah has a background in engineering. Correct that you're 160 00:08:32,679 --> 00:08:36,240 Speaker 1: the real engineering math person here. Why don't you talk 161 00:08:36,240 --> 00:08:39,640 Speaker 1: about how you how you got into that originally? That 162 00:08:39,800 --> 00:08:42,760 Speaker 1: is a good question in high school. I think it 163 00:08:42,800 --> 00:08:44,360 Speaker 1: goes back to high school. I was I was good 164 00:08:44,400 --> 00:08:48,840 Speaker 1: at science and math, and I was basically guided or 165 00:08:49,000 --> 00:08:54,160 Speaker 1: geared towards engineering. It was it was a viable path 166 00:08:54,200 --> 00:08:57,360 Speaker 1: for me, and there was a lot of scholarship money, 167 00:08:57,400 --> 00:09:00,800 Speaker 1: and there still is for anybody who has young women 168 00:09:02,240 --> 00:09:04,720 Speaker 1: or people of color who are looking to go into 169 00:09:05,240 --> 00:09:10,240 Speaker 1: any stem careers because it's very underrepresented by women and 170 00:09:10,960 --> 00:09:14,720 Speaker 1: by people of color. It was part scholarship money, part 171 00:09:14,920 --> 00:09:18,360 Speaker 1: I like get myself to another level in life, and 172 00:09:18,480 --> 00:09:22,280 Speaker 1: I just happened to have the aptitude to pull it off. 173 00:09:22,880 --> 00:09:25,760 Speaker 1: And then what was your career in that, because I 174 00:09:25,800 --> 00:09:29,120 Speaker 1: know you've worked for a couple of big engineering related 175 00:09:29,160 --> 00:09:32,080 Speaker 1: companies where you mostly straight on the engineering side. You 176 00:09:32,120 --> 00:09:37,520 Speaker 1: did some project management too, So yeah, Actually my career 177 00:09:37,640 --> 00:09:42,800 Speaker 1: trajectory was very, very nonlinear, and I'm guessing that is 178 00:09:42,840 --> 00:09:45,520 Speaker 1: the case with a lot of people. So I study 179 00:09:45,559 --> 00:09:49,319 Speaker 1: electrical engineering in school, and that was my first job 180 00:09:49,360 --> 00:09:52,560 Speaker 1: out of school, was electrical engineering. But they stuck me 181 00:09:52,559 --> 00:09:55,960 Speaker 1: in a lab doing some sort of testing, running a 182 00:09:55,960 --> 00:09:58,760 Speaker 1: machine and you know, collecting data. But there was like, 183 00:09:58,800 --> 00:10:03,199 Speaker 1: there was no windows. It was dark, brutal. People like it. 184 00:10:03,200 --> 00:10:07,400 Speaker 1: It became more and more miserable as time went on. 185 00:10:08,120 --> 00:10:11,840 Speaker 1: I eventually quit that job and I moved to New 186 00:10:11,920 --> 00:10:15,200 Speaker 1: York and I waited tables for a little bit, and 187 00:10:15,440 --> 00:10:18,960 Speaker 1: I eventually ended up teaching high school math for a 188 00:10:18,960 --> 00:10:22,320 Speaker 1: couple of years. That worked out for a while until 189 00:10:22,320 --> 00:10:25,840 Speaker 1: we had a family. We started a family. Then I 190 00:10:25,920 --> 00:10:28,720 Speaker 1: went back to engineering because it was a lot more 191 00:10:28,800 --> 00:10:30,959 Speaker 1: flexible with the hours. I didn't have to be a 192 00:10:31,040 --> 00:10:36,000 Speaker 1: work at eight o'clock every day, and that meant a 193 00:10:36,040 --> 00:10:38,640 Speaker 1: lot to me. It still does mean a lot to 194 00:10:38,640 --> 00:10:41,240 Speaker 1: me to have like make my own hours. That The 195 00:10:41,280 --> 00:10:44,559 Speaker 1: second time I went back into engineering, I did reliability engineering, 196 00:10:45,120 --> 00:10:48,920 Speaker 1: and that is in a nutshell, it's like it's failure analysis. 197 00:10:48,960 --> 00:10:52,560 Speaker 1: So I would look at a system design and figure 198 00:10:52,600 --> 00:10:55,760 Speaker 1: out or try to figure out what is the most 199 00:10:55,840 --> 00:10:59,679 Speaker 1: likely way it will fail and work with the designers 200 00:10:59,760 --> 00:11:03,960 Speaker 1: to mitigate the failure or if there's any single point failures, 201 00:11:04,080 --> 00:11:09,280 Speaker 1: or work in design mechanisms to mitigate those failures. And 202 00:11:09,320 --> 00:11:12,040 Speaker 1: that was a lot better suited for me because I 203 00:11:12,080 --> 00:11:16,880 Speaker 1: got to work with different engineering competencies and other people 204 00:11:17,040 --> 00:11:19,000 Speaker 1: on the team. So I was not in a dark 205 00:11:19,120 --> 00:11:25,640 Speaker 1: room with a computer and an Excel file. I mean, 206 00:11:25,720 --> 00:11:28,400 Speaker 1: you know, Excel is still like a happy place for me. 207 00:11:28,480 --> 00:11:31,040 Speaker 1: But El is great. Let's let's all shout out to itself. 208 00:11:32,920 --> 00:11:36,880 Speaker 1: But I do like as just as who I am, 209 00:11:36,960 --> 00:11:40,120 Speaker 1: I like to interact with people too. Yeah, well, in 210 00:11:40,160 --> 00:11:42,120 Speaker 1: the good news is engineering you can do both, right, 211 00:11:42,160 --> 00:11:44,400 Speaker 1: I mean there's so many different ways, and you've experienced, 212 00:11:44,400 --> 00:11:46,560 Speaker 1: I mean between being you know, in the dark room, 213 00:11:46,600 --> 00:11:48,760 Speaker 1: but then also a math teacher. You're with all kinds 214 00:11:48,760 --> 00:11:51,319 Speaker 1: of people all the time, and then you know group 215 00:11:51,440 --> 00:11:54,280 Speaker 1: lead of engineering projects and stuff. I mean, that's that's 216 00:11:54,280 --> 00:11:56,760 Speaker 1: a totally different form of it too, and so that's 217 00:11:56,760 --> 00:11:58,760 Speaker 1: probably good for people to hear. It's not all the 218 00:11:58,840 --> 00:12:01,079 Speaker 1: dark room now, It's definitely not all that are coron 219 00:12:02,480 --> 00:12:08,480 Speaker 1: long time listeners slash readers may recall that Aliyah had 220 00:12:08,480 --> 00:12:11,640 Speaker 1: a short appearance in my book. I know how she 221 00:12:11,760 --> 00:12:14,960 Speaker 1: does it during her time. You know, she lives in 222 00:12:15,000 --> 00:12:18,440 Speaker 1: upstate New York. You recorded your timelog during a very, 223 00:12:18,559 --> 00:12:21,320 Speaker 1: very snowy week. Do you happen to remember that? I do. 224 00:12:21,559 --> 00:12:25,360 Speaker 1: I remember, like it was like there were snowstorms and all, 225 00:12:26,160 --> 00:12:28,720 Speaker 1: and back then those were the worst things that could happen. 226 00:12:28,760 --> 00:12:30,960 Speaker 1: Right now you have a pandemic and you're like, okay, 227 00:12:30,960 --> 00:12:36,880 Speaker 1: now now I have the year. But yeah, I recall 228 00:12:36,960 --> 00:12:40,920 Speaker 1: that that was, and now that I documented that, I 229 00:12:40,920 --> 00:12:43,440 Speaker 1: feel like that happens at least once or twice a year, 230 00:12:43,480 --> 00:12:47,280 Speaker 1: whereby you know, there's a big snowstorm and somebody sick 231 00:12:47,360 --> 00:12:49,040 Speaker 1: and you have to go and get them from school 232 00:12:49,360 --> 00:12:53,360 Speaker 1: or everybody's home from school. You know, like your plans 233 00:12:53,480 --> 00:12:58,760 Speaker 1: change there, there's still very dynamic year to year in 234 00:12:58,800 --> 00:13:01,559 Speaker 1: a normal year. In this year, month to month, it's 235 00:13:01,600 --> 00:13:08,120 Speaker 1: been everything so different. Yeah, well, what was funny about 236 00:13:08,120 --> 00:13:10,600 Speaker 1: that week? I made a couple of things, but one 237 00:13:10,840 --> 00:13:15,120 Speaker 1: one is I love how people figure out how to 238 00:13:15,200 --> 00:13:19,280 Speaker 1: keep working. Like there was a situation where, you know, 239 00:13:19,840 --> 00:13:22,160 Speaker 1: like the snow is coming down rapidly, you and your 240 00:13:22,240 --> 00:13:24,000 Speaker 1: husband are trying to figure out like where are the 241 00:13:24,080 --> 00:13:25,440 Speaker 1: you know, kids are going to be for the day, 242 00:13:25,480 --> 00:13:26,960 Speaker 1: where you guys are going to be for the day. 243 00:13:27,440 --> 00:13:29,600 Speaker 1: And then here you are all ready to go for 244 00:13:29,720 --> 00:13:31,960 Speaker 1: like the conference call at one o'clock in the afternoon. 245 00:13:31,960 --> 00:13:33,960 Speaker 1: You've like made everything go to have that work, and 246 00:13:33,960 --> 00:13:38,280 Speaker 1: then like nobody else signs on. So it's like you 247 00:13:38,679 --> 00:13:40,360 Speaker 1: had made it all work to be there. It's like 248 00:13:40,400 --> 00:13:45,560 Speaker 1: everyone else can't figure it out. Aliah is on it. Yeah, yeah, yep. 249 00:13:47,240 --> 00:13:49,600 Speaker 1: But then the other cool thing we we had talked 250 00:13:49,640 --> 00:13:53,000 Speaker 1: about with this is you realized that you had a 251 00:13:53,120 --> 00:13:57,440 Speaker 1: very productive window kind of in the late afternoon. Has 252 00:13:57,559 --> 00:13:59,520 Speaker 1: has that always been the case for you is is 253 00:13:59,520 --> 00:14:01,640 Speaker 1: it sort of like you get into your gear kind 254 00:14:01,640 --> 00:14:05,319 Speaker 1: of you know, four o'clock to five o'clock. Was that 255 00:14:06,120 --> 00:14:08,120 Speaker 1: just that point in time? I think it was that 256 00:14:08,200 --> 00:14:13,760 Speaker 1: point in time. The one my one consistent like like 257 00:14:13,880 --> 00:14:16,400 Speaker 1: work window where I like really get a lot done 258 00:14:16,480 --> 00:14:19,720 Speaker 1: is usually early morning now, and it's always been that 259 00:14:19,760 --> 00:14:24,400 Speaker 1: way for because it's like four to six and I 260 00:14:24,760 --> 00:14:27,600 Speaker 1: have a family. Maybe it still is there, but I 261 00:14:27,720 --> 00:14:32,080 Speaker 1: just don't have as many opportunities to use that window 262 00:14:32,080 --> 00:14:35,800 Speaker 1: of time because it's like, Okay, that's homework time, it's 263 00:14:35,920 --> 00:14:39,360 Speaker 1: making dinner time, and you know, a couple of days 264 00:14:39,360 --> 00:14:42,120 Speaker 1: a week I do use that window, but it's usually 265 00:14:42,200 --> 00:14:47,600 Speaker 1: like more for like meetings or networking events. Yeah, I 266 00:14:47,600 --> 00:14:50,680 Speaker 1: mean we discussed how inconvenient that was as a productive 267 00:14:50,680 --> 00:14:54,160 Speaker 1: time for working mom. That's you know, if you get 268 00:14:54,200 --> 00:14:57,080 Speaker 1: your groove at four o'clock. Well, unfortunately that's you know, 269 00:14:57,160 --> 00:14:59,080 Speaker 1: but there were still ways to get it like once 270 00:14:59,160 --> 00:15:01,640 Speaker 1: or twice a week, right right, you know, you can't 271 00:15:01,640 --> 00:15:04,040 Speaker 1: get it every night. We're going to take a quick 272 00:15:04,040 --> 00:15:05,640 Speaker 1: ad break and then we'll be back to hear about 273 00:15:05,640 --> 00:15:08,760 Speaker 1: how Aliyah decided to change into a different form of career. 274 00:15:20,760 --> 00:15:23,440 Speaker 1: So I am back with Aliyah Kitwana, who has had 275 00:15:23,480 --> 00:15:27,640 Speaker 1: a long career in engineering, project management, you know, teaching, 276 00:15:28,240 --> 00:15:30,880 Speaker 1: and so you're doing all this and among the things 277 00:15:30,960 --> 00:15:32,800 Speaker 1: you talked about in the past is like starting a 278 00:15:33,080 --> 00:15:37,360 Speaker 1: side hustle. Did you wind up doing the side hustle 279 00:15:37,440 --> 00:15:40,720 Speaker 1: or j you decide to just go completely into changing 280 00:15:40,760 --> 00:15:43,800 Speaker 1: something new. Why don't you talk about that? Yeah, I 281 00:15:43,880 --> 00:15:46,640 Speaker 1: more or less went completely into well, no, let me 282 00:15:46,720 --> 00:15:49,480 Speaker 1: let me go back, because this has been like, this 283 00:15:49,520 --> 00:15:53,360 Speaker 1: has been years in the making. Initially Little Black Buddha, 284 00:15:53,400 --> 00:15:57,240 Speaker 1: which is my company, Uh, it was just I don't 285 00:15:57,280 --> 00:15:58,680 Speaker 1: want to say, Jess, but it was it was a 286 00:15:58,720 --> 00:16:01,360 Speaker 1: blog and that was something that I could do on 287 00:16:01,400 --> 00:16:05,680 Speaker 1: the side while I worked full time as an engineer. 288 00:16:06,240 --> 00:16:10,920 Speaker 1: And at some point actually the blog came after it. 289 00:16:10,960 --> 00:16:15,440 Speaker 1: So there was like this, this this pivotal moment in 290 00:16:15,560 --> 00:16:20,560 Speaker 1: my career where I discovered that what they were now 291 00:16:20,600 --> 00:16:23,360 Speaker 1: I didn't It wasn't just a discovery, but what they 292 00:16:23,360 --> 00:16:26,320 Speaker 1: were asking me to do it was not aligned with 293 00:16:26,360 --> 00:16:30,200 Speaker 1: my moral compass. It was it felt it didn't feel 294 00:16:30,200 --> 00:16:32,960 Speaker 1: good anymore. And so it was like it was at 295 00:16:33,000 --> 00:16:35,960 Speaker 1: that point that I knew that I couldn't do the 296 00:16:36,120 --> 00:16:39,680 Speaker 1: job that I was being asked to do anymore, and 297 00:16:39,800 --> 00:16:44,120 Speaker 1: for me, that set off kind of an existential crisis. 298 00:16:44,960 --> 00:16:46,720 Speaker 1: I don't think they would make a movie about it, 299 00:16:46,760 --> 00:16:50,720 Speaker 1: per se, but it felt like it was not a 300 00:16:50,720 --> 00:16:52,520 Speaker 1: good situation. You know. It was like one of those 301 00:16:52,520 --> 00:16:56,440 Speaker 1: situations where you cry on your way to work. And 302 00:16:56,640 --> 00:16:59,200 Speaker 1: I wanted to get out, but I didn't know how, 303 00:16:59,400 --> 00:17:02,000 Speaker 1: and I and I started like looking for new jobs, 304 00:17:02,080 --> 00:17:05,960 Speaker 1: and eventually I landed on, you know, starting the blog 305 00:17:06,119 --> 00:17:10,520 Speaker 1: and then realizing that I could turn the blog into 306 00:17:10,640 --> 00:17:15,320 Speaker 1: something that could generate money. He eventually grew into a business, 307 00:17:15,520 --> 00:17:18,560 Speaker 1: and I was able to walk away from the job 308 00:17:18,600 --> 00:17:21,879 Speaker 1: that made me cry. Well that's good. You never want 309 00:17:21,920 --> 00:17:24,280 Speaker 1: to stick with a job that is making somebody cry. 310 00:17:24,359 --> 00:17:28,159 Speaker 1: So your business focuses on helping people in transitions, but 311 00:17:28,200 --> 00:17:30,680 Speaker 1: you still actually have that software component of it too. 312 00:17:30,680 --> 00:17:33,119 Speaker 1: How don't you explain how how the two work together. 313 00:17:34,080 --> 00:17:37,760 Speaker 1: I'll start with how I help people. So I helped 314 00:17:37,760 --> 00:17:41,880 Speaker 1: people through their own career transitions, and I was basically 315 00:17:41,920 --> 00:17:45,080 Speaker 1: my own, my first customer. It took me years to 316 00:17:45,480 --> 00:17:47,639 Speaker 1: figure it out, to kind of like figure out what 317 00:17:47,680 --> 00:17:49,560 Speaker 1: I wanted to do, what was right for me, what 318 00:17:49,880 --> 00:17:53,760 Speaker 1: was not right? For me what wouldn't work. And in 319 00:17:54,760 --> 00:17:59,879 Speaker 1: going through that years of evolution, I started to come 320 00:18:00,160 --> 00:18:03,200 Speaker 1: with a framework that would help, that I thought could 321 00:18:03,280 --> 00:18:07,359 Speaker 1: help other people who were going through similar transitions or 322 00:18:08,200 --> 00:18:14,280 Speaker 1: changes and just lacked clarity and that they knew that 323 00:18:14,320 --> 00:18:17,200 Speaker 1: where they were is like this is not it anymore, 324 00:18:18,040 --> 00:18:21,000 Speaker 1: but I just don't know what would work for me anymore. 325 00:18:21,600 --> 00:18:24,399 Speaker 1: And and so like in going through like those that 326 00:18:24,400 --> 00:18:28,960 Speaker 1: that several year long process, I pulled out like the 327 00:18:29,200 --> 00:18:32,000 Speaker 1: pieces that I thought could work for other people and 328 00:18:32,400 --> 00:18:36,119 Speaker 1: consistently work for other people. So I use that in 329 00:18:36,160 --> 00:18:39,000 Speaker 1: the in the coaching that I do. Uh. And then 330 00:18:39,119 --> 00:18:41,320 Speaker 1: I took that and I was like, well, you know, 331 00:18:41,640 --> 00:18:46,040 Speaker 1: we could put this into a software package and help 332 00:18:46,080 --> 00:18:49,680 Speaker 1: a lot more people if we if we can program 333 00:18:49,720 --> 00:18:51,760 Speaker 1: it and get the algorithms right, and you know all 334 00:18:51,800 --> 00:18:57,760 Speaker 1: that that text stuff ground there. Yeah, but of course 335 00:18:57,800 --> 00:18:59,720 Speaker 1: the software makes it scalable in a way. And then 336 00:18:59,760 --> 00:19:02,280 Speaker 1: you know, just you know, calling up Alia and saying 337 00:19:02,320 --> 00:19:07,480 Speaker 1: help me does not right exactly exactly. And And why 338 00:19:07,480 --> 00:19:09,000 Speaker 1: don't you we were talking earlier about this, but why 339 00:19:09,040 --> 00:19:11,439 Speaker 1: don't you explain for our listeners what what's the significance 340 00:19:11,480 --> 00:19:14,600 Speaker 1: of the little black Buddha. How does how does that 341 00:19:14,880 --> 00:19:20,040 Speaker 1: play into your philosophy of of this this company. So 342 00:19:20,040 --> 00:19:24,040 Speaker 1: so the philosophy in the company, the coaching, and even 343 00:19:24,040 --> 00:19:27,400 Speaker 1: in the software that I'm I'm doing is that it 344 00:19:27,480 --> 00:19:32,399 Speaker 1: is like it's a guide, so like I'll guide you 345 00:19:32,440 --> 00:19:35,560 Speaker 1: to the answer, but the answer is really already inside 346 00:19:35,600 --> 00:19:40,119 Speaker 1: you in Little Black Buddha itself, like it stems from 347 00:19:40,359 --> 00:19:45,440 Speaker 1: the Buddhist belief that everybody has an inner Buddha and 348 00:19:45,440 --> 00:19:48,920 Speaker 1: and to make it more palatable or within reach for everybody. 349 00:19:49,000 --> 00:19:51,760 Speaker 1: It's just you know that everybody has this inner divine 350 00:19:52,600 --> 00:19:56,160 Speaker 1: person or inner God, and it's a matter of knowing 351 00:19:56,200 --> 00:19:58,879 Speaker 1: how how to like hear it. It's there. But so 352 00:19:58,960 --> 00:20:01,560 Speaker 1: now now all of us can listen we're here it 353 00:20:01,640 --> 00:20:05,040 Speaker 1: or know how to access it. The tools in the 354 00:20:05,080 --> 00:20:09,160 Speaker 1: coaching that I do helps people to access it, even 355 00:20:09,200 --> 00:20:11,960 Speaker 1: though it's not a direct access. I don't like have 356 00:20:12,080 --> 00:20:15,040 Speaker 1: people go and meditate for a week or you know, 357 00:20:16,480 --> 00:20:21,760 Speaker 1: fun is that might be everyone leave me alone through it, right, 358 00:20:22,440 --> 00:20:26,320 Speaker 1: none of that. But it does I do as people 359 00:20:26,480 --> 00:20:29,399 Speaker 1: like it's a mirror, right, Like I show them a mirror, 360 00:20:29,480 --> 00:20:31,600 Speaker 1: like this is all that you have to work with, 361 00:20:31,640 --> 00:20:35,200 Speaker 1: which is typically a lot, It's just that some people 362 00:20:35,200 --> 00:20:37,840 Speaker 1: don't always realize that. Well, what if, you know, if 363 00:20:37,880 --> 00:20:40,119 Speaker 1: you were going to give our listeners an example of 364 00:20:40,480 --> 00:20:44,080 Speaker 1: something we could do to start listening to our own 365 00:20:44,240 --> 00:20:47,159 Speaker 1: inner buddha as we're trying to figure out, you know, 366 00:20:47,240 --> 00:20:51,160 Speaker 1: life in our transitions. Like, what's what's one practical thing 367 00:20:51,400 --> 00:20:55,359 Speaker 1: we could do? Typically, the first thing I start with 368 00:20:55,920 --> 00:21:00,960 Speaker 1: is is just a value assessment, just getting really clear 369 00:21:01,119 --> 00:21:04,440 Speaker 1: on what your values are right now. And so there's 370 00:21:04,440 --> 00:21:07,520 Speaker 1: a difference between like the aspirational values and like what 371 00:21:07,640 --> 00:21:09,399 Speaker 1: is really going on in your life right now. Like 372 00:21:09,480 --> 00:21:13,000 Speaker 1: you can say like a value quality family time, but 373 00:21:13,359 --> 00:21:16,360 Speaker 1: if you only have dinner once a week in at 374 00:21:16,359 --> 00:21:19,800 Speaker 1: that dinner, everybody is like really just checking CNN or 375 00:21:19,840 --> 00:21:23,840 Speaker 1: Facebook or you know, like nobody's tuned into dinner, then 376 00:21:24,040 --> 00:21:27,359 Speaker 1: then you have to question if quality family time is 377 00:21:27,359 --> 00:21:31,440 Speaker 1: really a thing for me. I think I said earlier too, 378 00:21:31,560 --> 00:21:35,600 Speaker 1: is that like flexibility and autonomy are super high on 379 00:21:35,640 --> 00:21:38,679 Speaker 1: my list of values, and so that has to be 380 00:21:39,600 --> 00:21:42,760 Speaker 1: part of any work that I do for your listeners. 381 00:21:42,760 --> 00:21:47,200 Speaker 1: I would advise just doing a quick value assessment, or 382 00:21:47,520 --> 00:21:49,600 Speaker 1: not even a quick but like a more in depth 383 00:21:50,160 --> 00:21:54,359 Speaker 1: value assessment and get clear on what is important to 384 00:21:54,520 --> 00:21:58,680 Speaker 1: them and what are the non negotiables, and like, if 385 00:21:58,680 --> 00:22:02,560 Speaker 1: there's anything in your life that is like out of 386 00:22:02,680 --> 00:22:06,040 Speaker 1: alignment with those values, then then you should maybe question 387 00:22:06,200 --> 00:22:10,520 Speaker 1: that and say, like is there something I can adjust 388 00:22:10,560 --> 00:22:14,280 Speaker 1: there or is there something that's like really just like 389 00:22:14,760 --> 00:22:19,199 Speaker 1: harming some aspect of my life and my ability to 390 00:22:19,280 --> 00:22:22,760 Speaker 1: move forward. And if if there is like a block, 391 00:22:23,160 --> 00:22:27,960 Speaker 1: then then start thinking about moving that block or going 392 00:22:27,960 --> 00:22:32,600 Speaker 1: around it. Yeah. Always challenging, though you've walked through it, 393 00:22:32,680 --> 00:22:35,160 Speaker 1: as you said, I mean it was a I mean, 394 00:22:35,280 --> 00:22:38,480 Speaker 1: was it a really challenging process for you? It strikes 395 00:22:38,480 --> 00:22:42,120 Speaker 1: me that, you know, having been in sort of more 396 00:22:42,200 --> 00:22:46,239 Speaker 1: structured environments for many years, then going out on your 397 00:22:46,280 --> 00:22:51,240 Speaker 1: own must have been emotionally challenging. Yeah, And just to 398 00:22:51,280 --> 00:22:53,720 Speaker 1: be clear, like I like officially went out on my 399 00:22:53,800 --> 00:23:00,240 Speaker 1: own September twenty nineteen, so that was really just six 400 00:23:00,280 --> 00:23:04,400 Speaker 1: months before the pandemic happened. It was it was very challenging, 401 00:23:04,480 --> 00:23:08,639 Speaker 1: and you know, like as an entrepreneur, it's not I 402 00:23:08,680 --> 00:23:12,280 Speaker 1: think sometimes like on Instagram or in the media, they 403 00:23:12,359 --> 00:23:14,680 Speaker 1: try to make it look like it's like gilamorous and 404 00:23:14,720 --> 00:23:19,400 Speaker 1: you're like this overnight success. And typically overnight successes take 405 00:23:19,600 --> 00:23:24,040 Speaker 1: ten years to get there. And when you're an entrepreneur, 406 00:23:24,119 --> 00:23:26,239 Speaker 1: you do everything. So I had to like I had 407 00:23:26,280 --> 00:23:28,800 Speaker 1: to learn how to market, I had to learn how 408 00:23:28,840 --> 00:23:35,359 Speaker 1: to sell and just continue to be uncomfortable and grow 409 00:23:35,680 --> 00:23:39,439 Speaker 1: and that that's how you move forward. Yeah, not having 410 00:23:39,520 --> 00:23:44,520 Speaker 1: the structure was challenging and is challenging still. I try 411 00:23:44,560 --> 00:23:48,399 Speaker 1: to give myself structure, but I also have to be flexible, 412 00:23:48,880 --> 00:23:54,400 Speaker 1: just because kids in school and all that STUFFE well, 413 00:23:54,400 --> 00:23:57,480 Speaker 1: we all do these days with them hanging out ready 414 00:23:57,560 --> 00:23:59,920 Speaker 1: to help them to the home office at any mom. 415 00:24:00,359 --> 00:24:02,960 Speaker 1: So let's talk about your day to day life right now, 416 00:24:03,000 --> 00:24:05,040 Speaker 1: Like what does what does a day look like for 417 00:24:05,080 --> 00:24:08,439 Speaker 1: you these days? Okay, I don't I don't know how 418 00:24:08,480 --> 00:24:11,280 Speaker 1: this will land, but I like I do so, Like 419 00:24:11,280 --> 00:24:16,000 Speaker 1: on a weekday, I wake up typically between four and 420 00:24:16,080 --> 00:24:18,000 Speaker 1: five in a morning. Oh my goodness. Yeah, I know, 421 00:24:18,800 --> 00:24:22,439 Speaker 1: it's like it's so weird, but you you and Sarah 422 00:24:22,480 --> 00:24:25,639 Speaker 1: I never do that on purpose, but okay, yes, early 423 00:24:25,920 --> 00:24:30,199 Speaker 1: have purpose and I do. I have a morning routine 424 00:24:30,240 --> 00:24:34,280 Speaker 1: where I, you know, I drink coffee and it's the 425 00:24:34,280 --> 00:24:37,439 Speaker 1: only time the house is silent, so I like, you know, 426 00:24:37,480 --> 00:24:41,280 Speaker 1: embrace the silence. Sometimes I journal, sometimes I meditate, and 427 00:24:41,320 --> 00:24:45,560 Speaker 1: then I can usually get in like one one to 428 00:24:45,640 --> 00:24:49,800 Speaker 1: two hours of solid work and then then then I 429 00:24:49,840 --> 00:24:52,720 Speaker 1: get the kids up and we try to have like 430 00:24:53,119 --> 00:24:56,479 Speaker 1: a set routine for them every day. The four year 431 00:24:56,520 --> 00:25:00,440 Speaker 1: old actually goes to preschool now, and yeah, that's really 432 00:25:00,960 --> 00:25:08,639 Speaker 1: changed our world. Yeah, we only started like one or 433 00:25:08,680 --> 00:25:11,359 Speaker 1: two months ago. So up until then, we've been trying 434 00:25:11,359 --> 00:25:13,879 Speaker 1: to make it work at home in it and wasn't. 435 00:25:14,760 --> 00:25:17,760 Speaker 1: So we get him dressed and off to school. Either 436 00:25:17,800 --> 00:25:22,680 Speaker 1: I take him or my husband takes him. And the youngest. 437 00:25:22,720 --> 00:25:25,600 Speaker 1: Everybody has a different schedule. So the nine year old, 438 00:25:25,720 --> 00:25:30,760 Speaker 1: her school is from twelve thirty to three thirty every day. Yeah, 439 00:25:30,760 --> 00:25:34,280 Speaker 1: it's weird, but she so she's responsible for walking the dog, 440 00:25:34,359 --> 00:25:36,560 Speaker 1: so she still has to get up every day and 441 00:25:37,160 --> 00:25:40,200 Speaker 1: you know, to her morning routine and then walk the dog. 442 00:25:40,720 --> 00:25:43,439 Speaker 1: Some days I walk with her because she she just 443 00:25:43,520 --> 00:25:45,399 Speaker 1: likes having me around still, so I'm like, okay, I'm 444 00:25:45,440 --> 00:25:50,600 Speaker 1: gonna cash in on that she refuses to talk to you. 445 00:25:50,680 --> 00:25:53,000 Speaker 1: That sounds great right now that I have a twelve 446 00:25:53,080 --> 00:25:55,680 Speaker 1: year old, I know it's not gonna last forever. Yeah, exactly. 447 00:25:56,080 --> 00:25:58,520 Speaker 1: So a couple of days a week, I do walk 448 00:25:58,560 --> 00:26:00,959 Speaker 1: the dog with her, and then getting the twelve year 449 00:26:01,000 --> 00:26:04,400 Speaker 1: old out of bed is also challenging. So her schedule 450 00:26:04,560 --> 00:26:09,040 Speaker 1: is like on Monday and Tuesday she has a synchronous schedule, 451 00:26:09,160 --> 00:26:14,639 Speaker 1: and then Wednesday is they were supposed to not have school, 452 00:26:14,720 --> 00:26:18,680 Speaker 1: but they really do. And then and Thursday and Friday 453 00:26:18,760 --> 00:26:22,840 Speaker 1: is asynchronous and they still have set meetings. But getting 454 00:26:22,840 --> 00:26:26,000 Speaker 1: her out of bed on the days like any day 455 00:26:26,040 --> 00:26:32,320 Speaker 1: is challenging. Making sure everybody says their their little chores 456 00:26:32,440 --> 00:26:35,680 Speaker 1: or what they need to do to start their day 457 00:26:35,760 --> 00:26:42,480 Speaker 1: is also a struggle. Anyways, for that hour or two 458 00:26:42,800 --> 00:26:47,840 Speaker 1: when I get everybody going, that's full on mom time. Yeah, 459 00:26:48,080 --> 00:26:51,359 Speaker 1: and then and then I can usually come downstairs and 460 00:26:52,520 --> 00:26:56,040 Speaker 1: more or less work until about four or five o'clock. 461 00:26:57,080 --> 00:27:00,280 Speaker 1: And work looks different every day. So some days, you know, 462 00:27:00,359 --> 00:27:03,640 Speaker 1: like I'm doing an interview today, and there's a lot 463 00:27:03,680 --> 00:27:07,320 Speaker 1: of networking events throughout the day, so there's not a 464 00:27:07,320 --> 00:27:09,240 Speaker 1: lot of like focused work that I get to do. 465 00:27:09,320 --> 00:27:14,199 Speaker 1: I did some this morning before everybody woke up, and 466 00:27:14,359 --> 00:27:18,240 Speaker 1: on Mondays I block out completely, so there's no I 467 00:27:18,280 --> 00:27:21,520 Speaker 1: don't have any meetings. I do like either content or 468 00:27:21,800 --> 00:27:25,840 Speaker 1: you know, I like work on like actual product development 469 00:27:25,880 --> 00:27:30,000 Speaker 1: type work. So I do try to block out periods 470 00:27:30,000 --> 00:27:34,520 Speaker 1: of time or whole days where I just don't I 471 00:27:34,600 --> 00:27:36,880 Speaker 1: don't talk to anybody. So I'm not in a dark 472 00:27:36,920 --> 00:27:42,320 Speaker 1: hole per se, but I just it's like now I 473 00:27:42,400 --> 00:27:46,439 Speaker 1: recognize the brilliance the dark all by myself. Yeah, so 474 00:27:46,480 --> 00:27:50,520 Speaker 1: there's a balance there. And I do have I'm a 475 00:27:50,560 --> 00:27:53,600 Speaker 1: part of an incubator now too, so I do have 476 00:27:53,720 --> 00:27:57,040 Speaker 1: office space. And I would say I go in like 477 00:27:57,359 --> 00:28:01,000 Speaker 1: once a week for a half day, but that's usually 478 00:28:02,119 --> 00:28:05,320 Speaker 1: to make sure I have a reliable internet or some 479 00:28:05,400 --> 00:28:10,359 Speaker 1: other like I have a big interview or meeting or 480 00:28:10,359 --> 00:28:13,880 Speaker 1: something like that. Very cool. And what time if you're 481 00:28:13,880 --> 00:28:15,680 Speaker 1: waking up between four and five? What time does the 482 00:28:15,760 --> 00:28:20,320 Speaker 1: day end for me? I turned into a pumpkin at 483 00:28:20,359 --> 00:28:23,880 Speaker 1: about eight o'clock. You managed to get your kids out? 484 00:28:23,920 --> 00:28:25,639 Speaker 1: Like does your twelve year old actually go to sleep 485 00:28:25,680 --> 00:28:29,480 Speaker 1: by house? After me? Yeah? Yeah, I mean I don't 486 00:28:29,520 --> 00:28:32,400 Speaker 1: fall I usually fall asleep between like nine and ten. 487 00:28:33,560 --> 00:28:38,200 Speaker 1: But like as far as anything like useful, nothing happens 488 00:28:38,280 --> 00:28:41,160 Speaker 1: after a Yeah, like I can read a book or 489 00:28:41,440 --> 00:28:43,719 Speaker 1: you know, get the bed kids to bed. But that's 490 00:28:43,760 --> 00:28:47,560 Speaker 1: about it. That's about it. It sounds good. Yeah, well 491 00:28:47,560 --> 00:28:49,400 Speaker 1: this is really cool to you know, hear about your 492 00:28:49,440 --> 00:28:52,640 Speaker 1: new business and how you've managed to transition. Do you 493 00:28:52,720 --> 00:28:56,080 Speaker 1: have any sort of advice for people who are thinking 494 00:28:56,680 --> 00:29:00,320 Speaker 1: about making a big transition, just anything that have been 495 00:29:00,320 --> 00:29:07,200 Speaker 1: helpful to you as you were contemplating doing this. Oh well, 496 00:29:07,240 --> 00:29:10,280 Speaker 1: so two things. Well, actually it's the same thing. Just 497 00:29:10,360 --> 00:29:13,239 Speaker 1: don't do it alone. One of the best things I 498 00:29:13,280 --> 00:29:16,760 Speaker 1: did this year was, you know, I became a part 499 00:29:16,840 --> 00:29:22,360 Speaker 1: of a lot of different roundtables and mastermind groups and 500 00:29:23,320 --> 00:29:29,120 Speaker 1: learning and talking with other entrepreneurs like has changed my world. 501 00:29:29,360 --> 00:29:31,800 Speaker 1: And for the first couple of months I tried to 502 00:29:31,800 --> 00:29:34,120 Speaker 1: do everything on my own and figure it out. You know, 503 00:29:34,200 --> 00:29:38,080 Speaker 1: I would call people and ask questions. But having more 504 00:29:38,320 --> 00:29:41,920 Speaker 1: of a structured place to meet with people who are 505 00:29:42,080 --> 00:29:46,600 Speaker 1: experiencing the same thing as you is a big plus. 506 00:29:46,720 --> 00:29:48,920 Speaker 1: So I would recommend not doing it on your own. 507 00:29:49,240 --> 00:29:52,000 Speaker 1: I talked to some women who you know, like they've 508 00:29:52,000 --> 00:29:55,440 Speaker 1: done they've read all the books and they listen to 509 00:29:55,560 --> 00:29:57,720 Speaker 1: podcasts and like you can and that's what I did 510 00:29:57,840 --> 00:30:02,480 Speaker 1: for years, right, so and uh, and I would recommend 511 00:30:02,560 --> 00:30:07,400 Speaker 1: like do that and get some help to investing yourself 512 00:30:07,440 --> 00:30:11,160 Speaker 1: and get some help to very good advice. Well, we 513 00:30:11,200 --> 00:30:14,680 Speaker 1: always end with a love of the week, and this 514 00:30:14,720 --> 00:30:17,920 Speaker 1: is something that is making our life really cool right now. 515 00:30:18,960 --> 00:30:21,720 Speaker 1: People who read my blog know that I have been. 516 00:30:21,960 --> 00:30:26,080 Speaker 1: I just bought a house. I'm undertaking a huge home renovation. 517 00:30:26,520 --> 00:30:30,120 Speaker 1: So I've been enjoying looking at both howse and the 518 00:30:30,240 --> 00:30:35,440 Speaker 1: various like kitchens of Instagram, bathrooms of Instagram. Really that 519 00:30:35,600 --> 00:30:39,280 Speaker 1: was the thing, you know, porches of Instagram. Like there 520 00:30:39,280 --> 00:30:41,760 Speaker 1: are cats with all these names, and so I'm like 521 00:30:41,800 --> 00:30:44,680 Speaker 1: looking at all of them, which has been you know, fun, 522 00:30:44,720 --> 00:30:46,840 Speaker 1: probably waste a lot of time, but I you know, 523 00:30:46,880 --> 00:30:48,880 Speaker 1: I'm pondering what the thing will look at. So I 524 00:30:48,880 --> 00:30:51,440 Speaker 1: guess kitchens of Instagram will be my my love of 525 00:30:51,480 --> 00:30:54,640 Speaker 1: the week. So what have you been finding enjoyable this 526 00:30:54,640 --> 00:30:57,920 Speaker 1: this past week. Yes, I have been. I've been listening 527 00:30:57,960 --> 00:31:03,080 Speaker 1: to the Outlander series awesome audible. I mean it's not 528 00:31:03,520 --> 00:31:07,880 Speaker 1: but that's a project that's going to take it. That's 529 00:31:07,920 --> 00:31:12,120 Speaker 1: that's been my distraction. And you know it's not high. 530 00:31:12,240 --> 00:31:13,800 Speaker 1: Well I don't. I don't want to say it's not high, 531 00:31:14,200 --> 00:31:18,600 Speaker 1: but it's it's it's been my distraction. That's good. That's good. Yeah, 532 00:31:18,840 --> 00:31:21,000 Speaker 1: I can contract you for like, I think, like one 533 00:31:21,080 --> 00:31:25,200 Speaker 1: hundred and twenty hours. The one book I'm on is 534 00:31:25,240 --> 00:31:30,200 Speaker 1: like forty something hours. It's that like I said, that's 535 00:31:30,400 --> 00:31:35,640 Speaker 1: that's a project but for a long time. Well, Alia, 536 00:31:35,720 --> 00:31:38,000 Speaker 1: thank you so much for joining us. If our listeners 537 00:31:38,000 --> 00:31:40,520 Speaker 1: want to go check out your business, where can they go? 538 00:31:40,560 --> 00:31:44,600 Speaker 1: Where can they connect with you? Okay? So I am 539 00:31:44,600 --> 00:31:48,960 Speaker 1: currently doing a crowdfund campaign for the software that I'm developing, 540 00:31:49,160 --> 00:31:52,120 Speaker 1: and they can learn more about the product and the 541 00:31:52,200 --> 00:31:57,800 Speaker 1: campaign at LBB as in Little Black Vodha dot Fyi 542 00:31:58,040 --> 00:32:04,360 Speaker 1: board slash path and your website itself is Little Bye 543 00:32:04,360 --> 00:32:07,360 Speaker 1: Buddha dot Comudda dot com. All right, well please check 544 00:32:07,400 --> 00:32:09,520 Speaker 1: it out. And Alia, thanks for joining us. Thanks for 545 00:32:09,520 --> 00:32:13,000 Speaker 1: having me. All right, Well, that was fun listening to Eliah. 546 00:32:13,880 --> 00:32:18,400 Speaker 1: So we're back with our Q and A. I guess 547 00:32:18,480 --> 00:32:20,880 Speaker 1: I can uh read it. This is what we call 548 00:32:20,960 --> 00:32:25,120 Speaker 1: the classic best of both worlds questions, some version of 549 00:32:25,160 --> 00:32:28,680 Speaker 1: which we get a lot get sent into the blogs. 550 00:32:28,880 --> 00:32:31,680 Speaker 1: I in fact wrote a blog post about similar topic recently, 551 00:32:31,760 --> 00:32:33,920 Speaker 1: so go ahead and read it. So this listener has 552 00:32:34,280 --> 00:32:36,880 Speaker 1: a little boy who is two and a three month 553 00:32:36,880 --> 00:32:40,080 Speaker 1: old baby girl. For the past two years, they've done 554 00:32:40,120 --> 00:32:43,320 Speaker 1: a nanny share with another family, which was great, but 555 00:32:43,400 --> 00:32:46,840 Speaker 1: they started having differences of opinions and she learned recently 556 00:32:46,880 --> 00:32:48,360 Speaker 1: that the other family is going to go to a 557 00:32:48,400 --> 00:32:51,720 Speaker 1: daycare situation. She says, they love the nanny they have 558 00:32:52,440 --> 00:32:54,680 Speaker 1: and we let her know that we'd like to discuss 559 00:32:54,720 --> 00:32:57,040 Speaker 1: taking her on full time. When the nanny share it 560 00:32:57,120 --> 00:32:59,960 Speaker 1: dissolved the challenge. She says that if she isn't willing 561 00:33:00,080 --> 00:33:01,920 Speaker 1: to take a pay cut, our family could be paying 562 00:33:01,920 --> 00:33:04,200 Speaker 1: for me to go to work. I know this is 563 00:33:04,200 --> 00:33:06,840 Speaker 1: a short amount of time in the grand scheme of life, 564 00:33:06,840 --> 00:33:09,000 Speaker 1: but it is still hard to swallow. I know I 565 00:33:09,040 --> 00:33:11,280 Speaker 1: would struggle with daycare, so there's a good reason to 566 00:33:11,400 --> 00:33:14,240 Speaker 1: choose a nanny. We could look for another nanny's share 567 00:33:14,280 --> 00:33:17,160 Speaker 1: situation or look for a different nanny, but we're not 568 00:33:17,160 --> 00:33:19,880 Speaker 1: sure the grass would be greener because it's very hard 569 00:33:19,920 --> 00:33:23,360 Speaker 1: to find good, quality caregivers that you like. She says. 570 00:33:23,360 --> 00:33:25,800 Speaker 1: She's also been having discussions with her husband about staying 571 00:33:25,800 --> 00:33:28,360 Speaker 1: home with the two kids, and I'm torn on the idea. 572 00:33:28,480 --> 00:33:32,360 Speaker 1: She's a director of marketing at a company. She likes 573 00:33:32,360 --> 00:33:35,520 Speaker 1: her job. They're good to me. There's flexibility, but the 574 00:33:35,600 --> 00:33:38,280 Speaker 1: expectation is to be in the office as much as possible. 575 00:33:38,680 --> 00:33:40,680 Speaker 1: She says, I know that leaving could set me back 576 00:33:40,720 --> 00:33:43,360 Speaker 1: on my future earnings and skills. However, it's hard to 577 00:33:43,360 --> 00:33:45,680 Speaker 1: miss out on so much time with my kids when 578 00:33:45,720 --> 00:33:49,240 Speaker 1: I won't be able to contribute financially to our lives. 579 00:33:49,960 --> 00:33:51,960 Speaker 1: Of course, you know, with a three month old baby. 580 00:33:51,960 --> 00:33:54,680 Speaker 1: She's also like a week back from maternity leave, so 581 00:33:54,720 --> 00:33:56,960 Speaker 1: there's a lot of big emotions here. I'm reading into 582 00:33:56,960 --> 00:33:59,640 Speaker 1: this too. So anyway, Sarah, she says, what is your 583 00:33:59,680 --> 00:34:02,280 Speaker 1: person on the situation? She says, I think I know 584 00:34:02,320 --> 00:34:04,120 Speaker 1: what you're going to answer, but I want to know 585 00:34:04,520 --> 00:34:07,240 Speaker 1: for sure. So funny, Well, first I wanted to just 586 00:34:07,240 --> 00:34:09,799 Speaker 1: take a moment and mention the idea of a nanny share. 587 00:34:10,120 --> 00:34:12,440 Speaker 1: It's not something we've talked about much on this podcast. 588 00:34:12,760 --> 00:34:15,880 Speaker 1: I think it makes total sense when you have one baby, 589 00:34:15,920 --> 00:34:18,840 Speaker 1: perhaps and you have a really close friend or nearby 590 00:34:18,920 --> 00:34:21,160 Speaker 1: neighbor that just has one baby. But I can imagine 591 00:34:21,160 --> 00:34:23,680 Speaker 1: that as kids get older and schedules get more complicated, 592 00:34:25,120 --> 00:34:27,520 Speaker 1: I'd be surprised to hear there's that many situations that 593 00:34:27,600 --> 00:34:29,839 Speaker 1: end up working out long long term, just because as 594 00:34:29,880 --> 00:34:31,719 Speaker 1: multiple people add more kids to the mix than all 595 00:34:31,719 --> 00:34:33,360 Speaker 1: of a sudden, you're asking the me and nanny to 596 00:34:33,360 --> 00:34:36,440 Speaker 1: potentially manage two households and four kids, and pretty soon 597 00:34:36,440 --> 00:34:38,520 Speaker 1: you've basically created an in home daycare. And I just 598 00:34:38,840 --> 00:34:41,239 Speaker 1: i'd be curious if you're a listener who's had a 599 00:34:41,320 --> 00:34:43,960 Speaker 1: nanny share work long term let us know, because I 600 00:34:44,000 --> 00:34:47,120 Speaker 1: think that is a setup that we haven't really discussed 601 00:34:47,160 --> 00:34:48,759 Speaker 1: as much on this pot I also want to know 602 00:34:49,160 --> 00:34:54,080 Speaker 1: that the legal question whose employee is she? Right? Because I, 603 00:34:54,320 --> 00:34:56,040 Speaker 1: you know, I am going to presume here that people 604 00:34:56,120 --> 00:35:00,000 Speaker 1: are paying their nannies on the books legally following all 605 00:35:00,080 --> 00:35:03,799 Speaker 1: employment laws, which means that somebody needs the employment identification 606 00:35:04,000 --> 00:35:06,360 Speaker 1: number and needs to be doing the paperwork, and that 607 00:35:06,520 --> 00:35:08,759 Speaker 1: is the person or the entity. If you create an 608 00:35:08,920 --> 00:35:12,160 Speaker 1: entity who has like the disability insurance policy on that, 609 00:35:12,200 --> 00:35:15,160 Speaker 1: if your state requires that, all those sorts of things. 610 00:35:15,320 --> 00:35:17,719 Speaker 1: So if you have a nanny share, who is that, like, right? 611 00:35:17,760 --> 00:35:20,680 Speaker 1: Which which family is that? Or do you create a 612 00:35:20,800 --> 00:35:25,239 Speaker 1: you know, a legal you know LLC that then employs 613 00:35:25,280 --> 00:35:28,560 Speaker 1: the person. I don't know. That is really confusing, and 614 00:35:28,600 --> 00:35:31,839 Speaker 1: then you'd have to with the other person. Yeah, it's 615 00:35:31,840 --> 00:35:33,800 Speaker 1: almost like you're starting a small company and then the 616 00:35:33,840 --> 00:35:35,920 Speaker 1: other person pays you, and then is that income? Like, 617 00:35:36,000 --> 00:35:38,200 Speaker 1: my god, you're right the tax implications of that are. 618 00:35:39,520 --> 00:35:42,560 Speaker 1: That's why I've always been curious about, Like, when people 619 00:35:42,560 --> 00:35:45,279 Speaker 1: are recommending the nanny share, I'm like, so are you 620 00:35:45,360 --> 00:35:47,759 Speaker 1: able to do that legally? I mean maybe, I'm sure 621 00:35:47,800 --> 00:35:49,960 Speaker 1: somebody must be able to and they figured it out, 622 00:35:49,960 --> 00:35:52,239 Speaker 1: but I actually have no idea what it is. So 623 00:35:52,360 --> 00:35:54,520 Speaker 1: maybe our listeners can tell us. All right, that was 624 00:35:54,560 --> 00:35:56,560 Speaker 1: a little digression there. Okay, maybe we could have an 625 00:35:56,560 --> 00:36:01,240 Speaker 1: accountant guest expel that says how this how this works? Yes, okay, 626 00:36:01,239 --> 00:36:03,520 Speaker 1: that was a huge digression. I will read my take 627 00:36:03,600 --> 00:36:05,279 Speaker 1: that I wrote down and then you can reverse which 628 00:36:05,280 --> 00:36:07,880 Speaker 1: I liked. I guess you know. I always say the 629 00:36:07,880 --> 00:36:10,880 Speaker 1: answer goes beyond money, and you have to remember that 630 00:36:11,680 --> 00:36:14,440 Speaker 1: part of this is not just a dollars and cents calculation. 631 00:36:14,600 --> 00:36:15,919 Speaker 1: It's what do you want to do with the next 632 00:36:15,920 --> 00:36:18,480 Speaker 1: few years of your life? Like we always have to remember, 633 00:36:18,560 --> 00:36:21,719 Speaker 1: like the tagline life is finite, life is short. So 634 00:36:22,480 --> 00:36:25,359 Speaker 1: if you want to work, then you should find out 635 00:36:25,360 --> 00:36:26,919 Speaker 1: a way to do that. And if you really want 636 00:36:26,960 --> 00:36:29,160 Speaker 1: to stay home and you enjoy that, then I think 637 00:36:29,200 --> 00:36:31,759 Speaker 1: that if it's financially feasible for your family, you could 638 00:36:31,760 --> 00:36:33,319 Speaker 1: figure out a way to do that. So I think, 639 00:36:33,360 --> 00:36:35,280 Speaker 1: like the deepest question is like what do you truly 640 00:36:35,360 --> 00:36:38,000 Speaker 1: want in your heart for me? And I know this 641 00:36:38,040 --> 00:36:40,920 Speaker 1: is like sort of like unpopular to admit sometimes because 642 00:36:40,960 --> 00:36:43,080 Speaker 1: we're all supposed to love the idea of staying home 643 00:36:43,080 --> 00:36:46,080 Speaker 1: with our babies for hours and hours and days on end. 644 00:36:46,080 --> 00:36:47,600 Speaker 1: But you can tell by the way I'm describing it 645 00:36:47,640 --> 00:36:50,520 Speaker 1: that that it's fun for me. For a couple of 646 00:36:50,520 --> 00:36:55,759 Speaker 1: months during maternity leave, it was not something that I 647 00:36:55,760 --> 00:36:57,799 Speaker 1: I mean, yes, I'm bittersweet to have to deal with 648 00:36:57,840 --> 00:36:59,719 Speaker 1: pumping and leaving my baby, but at the same time, 649 00:36:59,719 --> 00:37:01,760 Speaker 1: at the end of my maternity leaves, I was typically 650 00:37:01,800 --> 00:37:05,960 Speaker 1: ready to get back to the adult contact contact that 651 00:37:06,000 --> 00:37:07,960 Speaker 1: I have during the day and kind of the intellectual 652 00:37:08,040 --> 00:37:11,200 Speaker 1: stimulation and just the fun parts of my job. And 653 00:37:11,920 --> 00:37:16,240 Speaker 1: I wouldn't have been particularly happy staying home and taking 654 00:37:16,280 --> 00:37:19,960 Speaker 1: on all of the household running and childcare duties. I 655 00:37:19,960 --> 00:37:23,400 Speaker 1: guess I could have, but that just wasn't what I wanted. 656 00:37:23,400 --> 00:37:25,120 Speaker 1: And I know, like again, in our society, it can 657 00:37:25,160 --> 00:37:27,919 Speaker 1: be really hard to admit that out loud. But then 658 00:37:28,080 --> 00:37:29,560 Speaker 1: if you end up forcing yourself to do that and 659 00:37:29,600 --> 00:37:31,520 Speaker 1: you're not happy, then it's probably not going to be 660 00:37:31,560 --> 00:37:34,880 Speaker 1: good for anyone anyway, your children included, if you're miserable. 661 00:37:35,000 --> 00:37:38,080 Speaker 1: So I think that, you know, the biggest calculation. I 662 00:37:38,120 --> 00:37:40,840 Speaker 1: know Laura's going to go through some like financial reasons 663 00:37:40,880 --> 00:37:44,480 Speaker 1: to potentially go back to work in terms of income loss, 664 00:37:44,480 --> 00:37:46,880 Speaker 1: But I think the bigger question is like what do 665 00:37:46,920 --> 00:37:48,560 Speaker 1: you want? And if you want to stay home, that's 666 00:37:48,560 --> 00:37:51,759 Speaker 1: okay too. Like you know, maybe that's like you really 667 00:37:51,800 --> 00:37:53,480 Speaker 1: miss that and you love those baby years and you 668 00:37:53,520 --> 00:37:55,640 Speaker 1: want to maximize the time spent at home, and you're 669 00:37:55,640 --> 00:37:57,520 Speaker 1: a driven person. You listen to best of both worlds. 670 00:37:57,560 --> 00:37:59,200 Speaker 1: I bet you could catch up later on, and we 671 00:37:59,239 --> 00:38:01,680 Speaker 1: have many stories of people who do. But if you 672 00:38:01,719 --> 00:38:04,080 Speaker 1: want to go back to work, then that is also 673 00:38:04,160 --> 00:38:06,759 Speaker 1: completely okay. I'm giving you permission to admit that out 674 00:38:06,760 --> 00:38:09,880 Speaker 1: loud and go for it. Yeah. I mean this is also, 675 00:38:09,960 --> 00:38:12,279 Speaker 1: like I said, she is like literally one week back 676 00:38:12,320 --> 00:38:15,080 Speaker 1: from eternity leave, and I think, you know, if we 677 00:38:15,120 --> 00:38:17,560 Speaker 1: go back and listen to, for instance, Sarah one week 678 00:38:17,600 --> 00:38:21,439 Speaker 1: back from maternity leave, there's a lot of you know, 679 00:38:21,800 --> 00:38:24,719 Speaker 1: the pumping, the craziness that like getting out the door 680 00:38:24,719 --> 00:38:27,279 Speaker 1: in the morning. Yeah, it's hard. It's hard, and so 681 00:38:27,800 --> 00:38:30,759 Speaker 1: I would say, possibly you want to be careful about 682 00:38:30,800 --> 00:38:36,160 Speaker 1: making huge decisions in that moment. So one thing you 683 00:38:36,200 --> 00:38:38,239 Speaker 1: could say is, I'm not doing anything long term. I'm 684 00:38:38,239 --> 00:38:41,240 Speaker 1: going to say six months, six to twelve months, will 685 00:38:41,480 --> 00:38:44,240 Speaker 1: just try being back at work, see how it goes. 686 00:38:44,840 --> 00:38:48,279 Speaker 1: If I feel like my income is not posed, you know, 687 00:38:48,360 --> 00:38:50,840 Speaker 1: poised to rise at all, I feel like I'm not 688 00:38:50,920 --> 00:38:55,040 Speaker 1: advancing I you know, am not excited about being back, 689 00:38:55,080 --> 00:38:57,879 Speaker 1: then sure, you know, make the decision to stay home 690 00:38:57,880 --> 00:39:01,880 Speaker 1: with your kids. That's wonderful. If you, on the other hand, 691 00:39:01,920 --> 00:39:03,840 Speaker 1: are like, oh, well, now that I'm past those hard 692 00:39:03,920 --> 00:39:06,520 Speaker 1: early pumping days, now that I'm sleeping better, you know, 693 00:39:06,560 --> 00:39:09,000 Speaker 1: I'm back excited about my job again. Well, then now 694 00:39:09,040 --> 00:39:12,720 Speaker 1: you know that's great. You know, I think financially, if 695 00:39:13,360 --> 00:39:15,400 Speaker 1: your family could afford for you to stay home, then 696 00:39:15,440 --> 00:39:17,799 Speaker 1: they can also probably afford for you to work, even 697 00:39:17,840 --> 00:39:20,400 Speaker 1: if it is for a year or two a little 698 00:39:20,400 --> 00:39:23,239 Speaker 1: bit of a loss. The question of whether your nanny 699 00:39:23,280 --> 00:39:24,759 Speaker 1: wants to take a pay cut, like, no, she does 700 00:39:24,800 --> 00:39:26,680 Speaker 1: not want to take a paycut. Like would you like, 701 00:39:26,719 --> 00:39:28,360 Speaker 1: do you want to take a pick? No, you don't, 702 00:39:28,400 --> 00:39:31,120 Speaker 1: so like and especially with a new baby, because then 703 00:39:31,160 --> 00:39:33,480 Speaker 1: you're asking her to deal with poddler slash baby, and 704 00:39:33,520 --> 00:39:35,719 Speaker 1: that is a very hard combination. So I agree, no 705 00:39:36,360 --> 00:39:38,719 Speaker 1: pay cut would be appropriate unless somehow her hours are 706 00:39:38,760 --> 00:39:40,960 Speaker 1: significantly slash. But it doesn't sound like they would be 707 00:39:41,000 --> 00:39:43,200 Speaker 1: if you were going back. Yeah, no, So I mean, 708 00:39:43,239 --> 00:39:47,000 Speaker 1: I think that's that's kind of off the table. But 709 00:39:47,480 --> 00:39:49,799 Speaker 1: you know, it is true that when you take time 710 00:39:49,880 --> 00:39:53,040 Speaker 1: out of the workforce, you shouldn't look at the calculation 711 00:39:53,239 --> 00:39:55,680 Speaker 1: just at one point in time either. And I did 712 00:39:55,680 --> 00:40:00,359 Speaker 1: a blog post about this recently, that because even if 713 00:40:00,400 --> 00:40:03,600 Speaker 1: you aren't earning much or maybe slightly negative for a 714 00:40:03,680 --> 00:40:06,720 Speaker 1: year or two, you get compounded growth in your income. 715 00:40:06,800 --> 00:40:09,480 Speaker 1: Most people do as they stay in the workforce, as 716 00:40:09,520 --> 00:40:12,520 Speaker 1: they develop their skills, as they develop their connections, as 717 00:40:12,520 --> 00:40:15,440 Speaker 1: they get promoted, as they switch jobs. That's actually a 718 00:40:15,440 --> 00:40:18,719 Speaker 1: way that people do, in fact see their income rise significantly. 719 00:40:18,760 --> 00:40:20,239 Speaker 1: Like if you're staying in the same job, yeah, you're 720 00:40:20,239 --> 00:40:22,440 Speaker 1: probably not getting cubage raises per year, but when you 721 00:40:22,480 --> 00:40:25,840 Speaker 1: switch jobs, you can, or if you leap through certain 722 00:40:25,880 --> 00:40:29,880 Speaker 1: hoops for being promoted, you can see your income rise substantially. 723 00:40:29,920 --> 00:40:32,640 Speaker 1: And that is very hard to do. If you leave 724 00:40:32,680 --> 00:40:34,480 Speaker 1: the workforce. The other thing is a lot of people 725 00:40:34,600 --> 00:40:37,000 Speaker 1: have trouble coming back at the same place that they 726 00:40:37,120 --> 00:40:41,880 Speaker 1: left because of various reasons. I mean, a, you have 727 00:40:41,960 --> 00:40:45,400 Speaker 1: a gap of six, seven, eight years on your resume, 728 00:40:46,040 --> 00:40:48,640 Speaker 1: so many of your connections may not be there. There 729 00:40:48,640 --> 00:40:51,120 Speaker 1: are skills you may need to come back to. You 730 00:40:51,120 --> 00:40:56,160 Speaker 1: may also find it hard to accept what working means 731 00:40:56,160 --> 00:40:58,879 Speaker 1: full time at that point because the family has become 732 00:40:59,000 --> 00:41:02,120 Speaker 1: used to you being this solution to any scheduling issues, 733 00:41:02,160 --> 00:41:03,759 Speaker 1: like if a child needs to be picked up at school, well, 734 00:41:03,760 --> 00:41:07,080 Speaker 1: of course it's you, because you're not working for pay 735 00:41:07,160 --> 00:41:09,279 Speaker 1: right now, and so your your spouse will expect that, 736 00:41:09,280 --> 00:41:10,920 Speaker 1: and all of a sudden, if it's not you, like 737 00:41:10,960 --> 00:41:12,960 Speaker 1: everyone's like, ah, this is crazy, Like how are we 738 00:41:13,000 --> 00:41:14,120 Speaker 1: going to make this work? And so I know a 739 00:41:14,160 --> 00:41:17,000 Speaker 1: lot of people have a really, really hard time with 740 00:41:17,160 --> 00:41:20,480 Speaker 1: making that transition. Now. As a ambitious, wonderful best of 741 00:41:20,520 --> 00:41:23,879 Speaker 1: birth both worlds listener, I'm sure she could. So again, 742 00:41:23,960 --> 00:41:26,760 Speaker 1: it all really comes down to what do you want 743 00:41:26,800 --> 00:41:29,239 Speaker 1: to do, And I'd suggest trying it for a couple 744 00:41:29,239 --> 00:41:31,080 Speaker 1: of months at least and seeing how it goes, and 745 00:41:31,120 --> 00:41:33,000 Speaker 1: then and then you can make your decision. I would 746 00:41:33,000 --> 00:41:37,000 Speaker 1: say try it for a couple of months past the pumping, yes, okay, yeah, 747 00:41:37,080 --> 00:41:39,799 Speaker 1: you know it's and then hey, it may be all 748 00:41:39,840 --> 00:41:42,640 Speaker 1: better at that point. All right, Well, this has been 749 00:41:42,719 --> 00:41:46,000 Speaker 1: best of both worlds. We've been interviewing Aliah Kitwana about 750 00:41:46,000 --> 00:41:49,200 Speaker 1: her engineering and entrepreneurial journey and we will be back 751 00:41:49,239 --> 00:41:51,400 Speaker 1: next week with more on making work in life fit together. 752 00:41:53,440 --> 00:41:56,200 Speaker 1: Thanks for listening. You can find me Sarah at the 753 00:41:56,200 --> 00:42:00,840 Speaker 1: shoebox dot com or at the Underscore Shoebox on a Instagram, 754 00:42:01,040 --> 00:42:05,319 Speaker 1: and you can find me Laura at Laura vandercam dot com. 755 00:42:05,440 --> 00:42:08,640 Speaker 1: This has been the best of both worlds podcasts. Please 756 00:42:08,719 --> 00:42:11,279 Speaker 1: join us next time for more on making work and 757 00:42:11,400 --> 00:42:12,520 Speaker 1: life work together.