WEBVTT - Kids and Anxiety

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<v Speaker 1>Stay Calm as a production of I Heart Radio. Welcome

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<v Speaker 1>to Stay Calm, your daily dose of calmness. I'm Bob Roth,

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<v Speaker 1>and I've been teaching people to meditate for fifty years,

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<v Speaker 1>helping them to stay calm under pressure, reboot and re

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<v Speaker 1>energize their lives, and basically be a happier, healthier version

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<v Speaker 1>of themselves. And now I want to help you do

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<v Speaker 1>the same. Ready, sit comfortably, take a few deep breaths,

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<v Speaker 1>and let's begin today's journey. If you think the stress

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<v Speaker 1>in America is bad today, we'll count your blessings. Go

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<v Speaker 1>back a hundred and forty years to one. That's when

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<v Speaker 1>a medical doctor wrote a book that warned about the

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<v Speaker 1>harrowing increase of nervousness in America and the causes he cited.

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<v Speaker 1>And I kid you not the emergence of the railroad,

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<v Speaker 1>Western Union and the pocket watch. I guess you could

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<v Speaker 1>say it's a matter of degrees. According to doctor Bill

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<v Speaker 1>sticks Rude, a clinical neuropsychologist in Silver Spring, Maryland and

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<v Speaker 1>co author of the national bestseller The Self Driven Child,

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<v Speaker 1>the impact of stress on life today is about ten

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<v Speaker 1>thousand times greater compared to a hundred forty years ago. Obviously,

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<v Speaker 1>doctor sticks Root is exaggerating a bit here, but he

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<v Speaker 1>does so to make two key points. One, it is

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<v Speaker 1>terrible out there, especially for our kids, and two, as parents,

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<v Speaker 1>we can do something about it. I have known doctor

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<v Speaker 1>sticks Rude as both a friend and a colleague for

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<v Speaker 1>over twenty years. In addition to his private practice, he

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<v Speaker 1>also serves as assistant professor of psychiatry and pediatrics at

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<v Speaker 1>the George Washington University School of Medicine and Health Sciences.

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<v Speaker 1>He has spent thirty years working with stressed out children, teens,

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<v Speaker 1>and young adults. Doctor sticks Rude says, even before the

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<v Speaker 1>COVID nineteen pandemic make the levels of anxiety, depression, and

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<v Speaker 1>other mental health problems were an epidemic proportions among kids.

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<v Speaker 1>Now it's only gotten worse. Kids are suffocating under the

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<v Speaker 1>pressure to get the best grades to get into the

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<v Speaker 1>best schools. Parents often ask doctor sticks Root, will it

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<v Speaker 1>get better for my kid in college? His answer, no,

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<v Speaker 1>it actually gets worse. The reality is that the mental

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<v Speaker 1>health crisis among college students has been escalating for years,

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<v Speaker 1>and now colleges, including the most elite, can't hire mental

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<v Speaker 1>health professionals fast enough. Doctor sticks Root has strong advice

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<v Speaker 1>don't micromanage your teen's life lighten up quote. As parents,

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<v Speaker 1>we need to be honest with ourselves. We don't always

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<v Speaker 1>know what's best for our kids. We don't always have

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<v Speaker 1>the right answers. The best message we can give a

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<v Speaker 1>teenager besides I love you, is that I have confidence

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<v Speaker 1>in your ability to make decisions about your own life.

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<v Speaker 1>And I have confidence that you will learn from your

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<v Speaker 1>own mistakes. And I want you to have tons of

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<v Speaker 1>experience of both before you go off to college. The

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<v Speaker 1>opposite approach certainly hasn't worked under the gaze of well

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<v Speaker 1>meaning but overbearing parents. Kids work ferociously hard for much

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<v Speaker 1>of their young lives to get into a top college,

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<v Speaker 1>but once they arrive, they are emotionally unprepared for what

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<v Speaker 1>follows doctor Sticks, who says there is one thing parents

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<v Speaker 1>can do to take the pressure off their kids and

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<v Speaker 1>give them a better shot at a healthy, happy life,

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<v Speaker 1>and that is not to pressure them to work harder

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<v Speaker 1>to do more. In fact, parents should encourage the opposite.

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<v Speaker 1>Give your kids what he calls radical downtime. Schedule more

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<v Speaker 1>time for things as simple and incredibly valuable as meditation

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<v Speaker 1>and sleep, daydreaming and mind wandering doctor Sticks Truth said

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<v Speaker 1>that teenagers need an average of nine and a quarter

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<v Speaker 1>hours of sleep, and yet most kids sleep less than

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<v Speaker 1>seven hours a night during the school year. That means

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<v Speaker 1>your teen's cognitive capacity is more impaired than if he

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<v Speaker 1>or she were legally drunk. But the best thing we

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<v Speaker 1>as parents can do to send our kids safely off

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<v Speaker 1>into the world is to foster an ongoing close relationship.

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<v Speaker 1>Closeness with a parent is like a silver bullet for

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<v Speaker 1>protecting our kids from emotional distress. He says. As parents,

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<v Speaker 1>we should strive to become a non anxious presence in

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<v Speaker 1>the lives of our kids. We all know it's much

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<v Speaker 1>easier to soothe a crying infant if you stay calm.

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<v Speaker 1>It's much easier to handle a three year old who

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<v Speaker 1>is having a tantrum in a store if you stay calm.

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<v Speaker 1>And if you've got a fifteen year old who comes

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<v Speaker 1>home and his girlfriend just dumped him and he's really upset, well,

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<v Speaker 1>it's much easier to listen and help problem solve if

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<v Speaker 1>you stay calm. So I leave you with Bill sticks

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<v Speaker 1>Dud's words, which, as you know, are the title of

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<v Speaker 1>this podcast. Stay Calm, My advice is to follow Dr

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<v Speaker 1>sticks Rud's advice, do everything you can to stay calm.

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<v Speaker 1>The primary beneficiaries right after you will be your kids.

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<v Speaker 1>All right, Let's end this time together doing something that

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<v Speaker 1>I think should be a feature of our everyday life,

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<v Speaker 1>and that's appreciation and gratitude. So let's take thirty seconds

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<v Speaker 1>of quiet, thirty seconds to take a break, just take

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<v Speaker 1>a moment. It turns out when we do that, it's

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<v Speaker 1>good for our health as well. I'll be right back

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<v Speaker 1>all right. Thank you for joining me today. I hope

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<v Speaker 1>you heard something that inspires, that uplifts you and that

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<v Speaker 1>you can incorporate into your own life. This is Bob Roth.

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<v Speaker 1>Stay calm. Hey, all of you out there, I'd love

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<v Speaker 1>to hear from you. You can send me your stories,

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<v Speaker 1>your questions, or anything else on your mind. Just connect

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<v Speaker 1>with me on Twitter, Facebook or Instagram at Meditation Bob.

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<v Speaker 1>You can also send me an email at meditation Bob

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<v Speaker 1>Roth at gmail dot com. I look forward to hearing

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<v Speaker 1>from you.