WEBVTT - Pickles are Cucumbers with Kelsey Weier

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<v Speaker 1>Hell I Suck at Dating with Dean Angler and Jared

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<v Speaker 1>Haven and I heard radio podcast. Hey, welcome to an

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<v Speaker 1>all new episode of Help I Suck at Dating. I

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<v Speaker 1>am Jared have Ben, of course, joined by Dean Angler,

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<v Speaker 1>who I just complimented his hair is looking incredibly well,

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<v Speaker 1>and he responded saying he hasn't washed it in a

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<v Speaker 1>few days, which I'm in the minority. I think hair

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<v Speaker 1>looks better when it's not washed. I told you that

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<v Speaker 1>in confidence, Jared um, But I don't know why my

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<v Speaker 1>hair is the topic of discussion to open the podcast,

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<v Speaker 1>because do it. We have a pretty freaking great episode

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<v Speaker 1>for you guys today. We have from Peter season of

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<v Speaker 1>The Bachelor and from Bachelor in Paradise. If I remember

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<v Speaker 1>see we're How the heck are you? I am doing great?

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<v Speaker 1>How are you guys? Oh? Well? From my hair, I'm

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<v Speaker 1>doing pretty well. Making fun of it. I just said

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<v Speaker 1>it looks spectacular. How is that making fun? Aside from

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<v Speaker 1>Jared in the office of his gastron on gastro uh,

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<v Speaker 1>it looks like a medical exams officer. I got a

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<v Speaker 1>medical I have a first aid kit, I have COVID

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<v Speaker 1>nineteen raping exams, I have a power drill. I have

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<v Speaker 1>everything you could possibly need in these office. Okay, guys,

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<v Speaker 1>gastro enologists, I'm mispronouncing that, but that's what I was

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<v Speaker 1>going for. Anyways, Kelsey, how are you? You already said

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<v Speaker 1>you're good. I'm a little scattered brain right now. I

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<v Speaker 1>don't know where my microphone is. I'm recording through my phone.

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<v Speaker 1>I lost my glass of water, but I found that.

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<v Speaker 1>That's that's a good thing. Kelsey, welcome to recording a

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<v Speaker 1>podcast with Dean. I'm you know what, I'm just gonna

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<v Speaker 1>let you take the range because you have your life

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<v Speaker 1>lay more to the other than idea. Well, Kelsey, of course,

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<v Speaker 1>everybody knows you from Peter Webber's season of the Bachelor,

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<v Speaker 1>and then you are on Bachelor in Paradise. So what

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<v Speaker 1>have you been up to since we last saw you

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<v Speaker 1>on Paradise? Um, I've been traveling a lot, hanging out

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<v Speaker 1>with my girlfriends, just living life and having fun. Well,

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<v Speaker 1>you're in Nashville. Where's your favorite place to travel? Um?

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<v Speaker 1>In the United States or in Europe? The world? We're

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<v Speaker 1>going internationally, the whole world. Come on. Well, I took

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<v Speaker 1>my first European trip this summer with Kelly and I

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<v Speaker 1>am obsessed with Europe now, so if I can go back, um,

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<v Speaker 1>actually want to do a sombership this year with her,

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<v Speaker 1>so hopefully with COVID and all that will be able

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<v Speaker 1>to do that. What part of Europe? Um? I want

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<v Speaker 1>to go back to Paris? So where have you been

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<v Speaker 1>in Europe? Um? So we started in Paris and then

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<v Speaker 1>we went to Sandra Pa and then we went to

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<v Speaker 1>Athens and then meeting else that you hit some pretty

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<v Speaker 1>good stops. Did you go like, obviously this is a

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<v Speaker 1>dating podcast, did you meet any people you know interest

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<v Speaker 1>while over across the ocean? Well, it's funny you say that.

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<v Speaker 1>So before the trip, I had gone on a two

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<v Speaker 1>year hiatus, no dating, no kissing, like, no nothing, just

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<v Speaker 1>cold turkey. Wait a minute, yeah, how long Peter was

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<v Speaker 1>my last? Was my last kiss? What about Paradise? Didn't

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<v Speaker 1>see you on in Paradise? No? I didn't. Holy crap.

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<v Speaker 1>Well I'm flabbergasted because it only feels like a year ago.

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<v Speaker 1>But holy crap, Holy moly, we're getting old. Continue. I'm sorry,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm gonna have a mental breakdown. So kind of other

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<v Speaker 1>trip is like, you know what, I need to start

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<v Speaker 1>putting myself out there again. So I did make out

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<v Speaker 1>with someone in making nose but not so. But yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>in two years that was my miconos was my first kiss.

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<v Speaker 1>And two years was this like a was it? Was

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<v Speaker 1>it a local Grecian? No, he was European, but um

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<v Speaker 1>not from Greece. Did anything come from it? Come on,

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<v Speaker 1>you just made out with the guy for the first

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<v Speaker 1>time in two years and you didn't try to pursue anything.

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<v Speaker 1>Isn't that how like p s I love you began? Yeah? No,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm not into that stuff. I just wanted to have fun,

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<v Speaker 1>put myself out there again. I also tried. So I'm

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<v Speaker 1>like horrible at flirting and my one of my girlfriends,

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<v Speaker 1>I was with me and Kelly. They were like, you

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<v Speaker 1>need to start flirting more. It's like, hey, we'll teach

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<v Speaker 1>me something. So they taught me that three second rule

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<v Speaker 1>where you look at someone for three seconds, smile, and

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<v Speaker 1>then look away. It works. Okay, So tell us go

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<v Speaker 1>over this rule a little bit more because I've never

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<v Speaker 1>heard this rule before, and I'm sure a lot of listeners.

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<v Speaker 1>There's surely other listeners that could benefit from it. So

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<v Speaker 1>what's the rule? So you like make eye contact with

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<v Speaker 1>someone that you think is cute or whatever, look at

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<v Speaker 1>that for like three seconds, smile, and then look away.

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<v Speaker 1>They cut month. Okay, it's really weird, but it works

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<v Speaker 1>like the first time. Have no doubt. I have no

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<v Speaker 1>doubt that Dean has been exposed to this rule because

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<v Speaker 1>I can totally from the opposite side of that, imagining

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<v Speaker 1>Dean being on the opposite side of someone staring at him.

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<v Speaker 1>I could totally see someone staring at Dean for three seconds,

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<v Speaker 1>looking away, and then Dean looking at one of his

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<v Speaker 1>buddies and being like, she wants me um one of

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<v Speaker 1>my AirPod just either. So I missed everything that was

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<v Speaker 1>just said, and I'm nothing. We're just making funny, don't mind.

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<v Speaker 1>I need to I need to learn more about this

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<v Speaker 1>three second roule. So okay, so we're turning like we're

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<v Speaker 1>turning flirting into a science, which has been done before.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't think there's any way there's only to knocket.

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<v Speaker 1>There's definitely like a formula to to kind of this

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<v Speaker 1>whole this whole game. But where did you hear this

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<v Speaker 1>whole three second rule thing? Like? Who told it to you? Kelly?

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<v Speaker 1>Kelly Flan again shop you I know Kelly flan again.

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<v Speaker 1>So she well she could come up with a three

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<v Speaker 1>second rule, but she told you about it. But she's

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<v Speaker 1>like the master flirter, Like you can totally tell timidating

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<v Speaker 1>to watch because I'm more reserves when it comes to

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<v Speaker 1>that stuff. I'd rather be pursued like and she just

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<v Speaker 1>she's a different in a different level, Like it's insane.

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<v Speaker 1>So I've learned a lot from her. Kelly gives off

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<v Speaker 1>very confident vibes, but she's very flirting, like she knows

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<v Speaker 1>how to turn it on. Yeah, that's what I mean.

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<v Speaker 1>She gives also like very confident vibes, like you guys

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<v Speaker 1>compliment each other very well. Then she's the confident, like

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<v Speaker 1>outspoken one in year like the more reserves you guys

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<v Speaker 1>kind of bounce off each other pretty well, I bet right. Um,

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<v Speaker 1>yes and no, So I'm very outspoken to like her

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<v Speaker 1>and I will tell each other how it is. We

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<v Speaker 1>have no problem being belong with each other. But when

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<v Speaker 1>it comes to guys, were completely different personality wise, worse

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<v Speaker 1>than learn a lot of ways. But guys, she has

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<v Speaker 1>a lot more confidence in that area than I do. Um,

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<v Speaker 1>So she's been helping me a lot lately, well so

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<v Speaker 1>so what's the reason that you took a two year

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<v Speaker 1>hiatus from even considering talking or dating other guys. So

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<v Speaker 1>I was in a relationship probably like a year year

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<v Speaker 1>before the show, and one of my therapists had said

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<v Speaker 1>you should take a year off dating, and I was like,

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<v Speaker 1>there's no way. I'm twenty eight. I want to be married,

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<v Speaker 1>have kids, you know that whole thing. And so I

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<v Speaker 1>was like, I'm not taking your off. So then I

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<v Speaker 1>decided to go on the show. Well then I got

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<v Speaker 1>off the show and as like, you know what, maybe

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<v Speaker 1>I should really listen to my therapist and take a

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<v Speaker 1>year off of dating. Well, then a year turned into

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<v Speaker 1>two years. Like I just got very comfortable being by myself.

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<v Speaker 1>I was listening to my friends drama and like the

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<v Speaker 1>highs and most of dating, and I was just like,

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<v Speaker 1>why would I want to be a part of that.

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<v Speaker 1>But then I got to the point where I'm like,

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<v Speaker 1>all right, if I don't start putting myself out there again,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm never gonna meet someone. So but it was good.

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<v Speaker 1>Do you think that's one of the reasons why we

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<v Speaker 1>didn't see you, um like former romantic connection in Bachelor

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<v Speaker 1>in Paradise because you were kind of just like more

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<v Speaker 1>focused on yourself. No, I just so I'm thirty, I'll

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<v Speaker 1>be thirty one, and like, I think from taking the

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<v Speaker 1>two years off, realized like I'm not gonna just if

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<v Speaker 1>I'm not interested in someone, I'm not going to pretend

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<v Speaker 1>or lead anyone on because I don't want that to

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<v Speaker 1>happen to me. So for me, I didn't have a

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<v Speaker 1>romantic connection with anyone, Like I wasn't even interested in

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<v Speaker 1>kissing anyone. And so I'm like, if I don't even

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<v Speaker 1>want to kiss you, I know I'm not interested in you.

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<v Speaker 1>So I was like hoping I would stay the next

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<v Speaker 1>week just to see if there was anyone else I

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<v Speaker 1>came down that I could be interested in. But I

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<v Speaker 1>was like, I'm not going to force it. I'm not

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<v Speaker 1>gonna like make out with someone just to stay. So

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<v Speaker 1>that was kind of my mindset. Yeah, that's good. I

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<v Speaker 1>think that's probably the right approach. Um. Hey, so in

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<v Speaker 1>our email, like we always get these rundowns before you

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<v Speaker 1>know we start these episodes, it says right here, I

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<v Speaker 1>was just skimming through it. You were Miss Iowa. Mm hmm, yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>two thousand seventeen. Did you know that my girlfriend was

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<v Speaker 1>Miss North Carolina. I did. Yeah, Calan and I talked

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<v Speaker 1>about that in Miami really because she must have been

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<v Speaker 1>probably twenty year after me. Wow, that's crazy. And I know,

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<v Speaker 1>like I know that the pageant world it's not like

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<v Speaker 1>a sorority per se. But I guess like once you

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<v Speaker 1>start competing a lot, it kind of becomes like a

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<v Speaker 1>little close knit family. So that's pretty cool. I have

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<v Speaker 1>no idea. Yeah, I wish I knew more about these things.

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<v Speaker 1>The only because the only thing I have to contribute

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<v Speaker 1>as Miss Congeniality, which I feel like the stereotype did

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<v Speaker 1>not win that so well. Ms Congeniality. Well, what I

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<v Speaker 1>found out about Miss Congeniality is the song from the

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<v Speaker 1>movie where William Shatner's like, she's Beauty and she's Grace,

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<v Speaker 1>she's Miss United States. That's fake because it's Miss America.

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<v Speaker 1>It's not Miss United States. Do you guys know this right? Well, well,

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<v Speaker 1>there's Miss USA and Miss America, so there're two pageants.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh well, that song, though, is not real, right right? Okay? Cool,

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<v Speaker 1>that's all I need to know. It could it could

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<v Speaker 1>be real? Are you sure that they just made it

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<v Speaker 1>up for the movie. Well, because I was trying to

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<v Speaker 1>it's it's definitely made it for the because I was

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<v Speaker 1>trying to research this one day I have. Anyway, let's

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<v Speaker 1>move on to something else because we also have Brett

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<v Speaker 1>Robinson who's coming up shortly. Uh and Brett is uh

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<v Speaker 1>from Big Brother and Kelsey is gonna come and stay

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<v Speaker 1>on with us. So it's gonna be us to Kelsey

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<v Speaker 1>and Brett. But before we do that, I do have

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<v Speaker 1>a question for you, Kelsey, because we're talking about the

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<v Speaker 1>three second rule and you said that you had a

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<v Speaker 1>nice makeout sess with a with a gentleman from Europe,

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<v Speaker 1>So I have to know did you do the three

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<v Speaker 1>second rule and that's how the makeout session began? Um No,

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<v Speaker 1>it's a little bit more complicated than that. I did

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<v Speaker 1>the three second rule. He then approached me, so it worked,

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<v Speaker 1>but then we didn't make out until when he met

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<v Speaker 1>up with us the next day at the next part. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>but the ice breaker was the three seconds, which is

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<v Speaker 1>what it's meant to do. Okay. So, Kelsey, so you

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<v Speaker 1>had this, you had this variants in Europe and you

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<v Speaker 1>enjoyed the just Europe in general. Did that kind of

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<v Speaker 1>like revitalize you to get back into the Dating World

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<v Speaker 1>or are you still kind of reeling yourself in a

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<v Speaker 1>little bit? No, it did, So what has it been

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<v Speaker 1>like since, like you got back to the USA. You're

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<v Speaker 1>in Nashville. Now, are you like jumping on the dating apps?

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<v Speaker 1>Are you going full steam ahead or are you kind

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<v Speaker 1>of easing into it? What are you doing? No dating apps?

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<v Speaker 1>I've I've never tried the dating apps. I just don't

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<v Speaker 1>think it's something for me. I'm a horrible Texter. I'd

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<v Speaker 1>rather talk on the phone. So, um, yeah, I haven't

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<v Speaker 1>done the dating apps and just trying to meet people organically.

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<v Speaker 1>I was talking to someone for about two months that

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<v Speaker 1>didn't work out, But other than that, I've just been

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<v Speaker 1>going on dates and trying to find different ways to

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<v Speaker 1>meet people. And it's funny because Kelly and I both

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<v Speaker 1>are single and work together a lot. So um. What

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<v Speaker 1>I've learned from her too is and like some of

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<v Speaker 1>my other friends, they like to if we're like at

0:12:04.559 --> 0:12:07.120
<v Speaker 1>a sporting event or like at another event, they'll like

0:12:07.200 --> 0:12:10.360
<v Speaker 1>take a picture and then they'll like take random people

0:12:10.440 --> 0:12:12.920
<v Speaker 1>just to see if they can get their attention, and

0:12:12.920 --> 0:12:16.320
<v Speaker 1>then they'll hide the tag, right, and it works a

0:12:16.320 --> 0:12:20.920
<v Speaker 1>lot of the time. People doing that who have met

0:12:22.080 --> 0:12:25.160
<v Speaker 1>I can't say, like, I bet you like Predator players

0:12:25.160 --> 0:12:29.319
<v Speaker 1>are like Titans players or know nothing like that, um

0:12:29.520 --> 0:12:33.000
<v Speaker 1>like bachelor people. No, I'm not going to tell you, guys,

0:12:33.200 --> 0:12:35.640
<v Speaker 1>she's smiling everyone I know you can't see because this

0:12:35.720 --> 0:12:38.480
<v Speaker 1>is a podcast. Because she's smiling. It was definitely you

0:12:38.520 --> 0:12:44.600
<v Speaker 1>don't think I had no problem reaching them? Right right right?

0:12:46.360 --> 0:12:48.280
<v Speaker 1>Let me ask you this. So I don't know if

0:12:48.280 --> 0:12:49.840
<v Speaker 1>you know this about help by Second Dating, but we

0:12:49.880 --> 0:12:54.440
<v Speaker 1>have a lot of attractive, successful, nice guys that listen

0:12:54.440 --> 0:12:56.640
<v Speaker 1>to this podcast. All not all, but most of them

0:12:56.640 --> 0:12:59.440
<v Speaker 1>are single guys, some whom live in Nashville. So let's

0:12:59.440 --> 0:13:02.280
<v Speaker 1>say one of them is really interested in getting your attention.

0:13:02.600 --> 0:13:04.400
<v Speaker 1>What kind of advice would you have for someone that

0:13:04.440 --> 0:13:06.960
<v Speaker 1>wants to get your attention, that wants to receive the

0:13:06.960 --> 0:13:08.920
<v Speaker 1>three second rule from you? Like, what's your type? Like,

0:13:08.960 --> 0:13:10.640
<v Speaker 1>what do you what kind of advice would you have

0:13:10.679 --> 0:13:13.080
<v Speaker 1>for someone that's going after after you? Are we talking

0:13:13.120 --> 0:13:17.240
<v Speaker 1>about out in person or just connecting? Yeah, like you know,

0:13:17.320 --> 0:13:20.040
<v Speaker 1>like not like connecting you know, through other mediums. But

0:13:20.080 --> 0:13:21.600
<v Speaker 1>just like let's say you guys are out and someone

0:13:21.640 --> 0:13:23.480
<v Speaker 1>spots you from across the bar, like what's that? What

0:13:23.520 --> 0:13:26.440
<v Speaker 1>do they need to do to get your attention? Come

0:13:26.520 --> 0:13:30.760
<v Speaker 1>up and approach me, keep the conversation going. So even

0:13:30.800 --> 0:13:33.720
<v Speaker 1>if the three second rule isn't doesn't have time to

0:13:33.880 --> 0:13:36.160
<v Speaker 1>develop your total okay with someone coming up and like,

0:13:36.840 --> 0:13:40.800
<v Speaker 1>I would prefer that. I would prefer someone to come up,

0:13:40.920 --> 0:13:44.400
<v Speaker 1>talk to me and pursue me. That's that's what I want.

0:13:44.400 --> 0:13:46.520
<v Speaker 1>I think That's why even on Paradise, I had a

0:13:46.520 --> 0:13:49.320
<v Speaker 1>hard time because I'm like, these guys expected me to

0:13:49.400 --> 0:13:51.200
<v Speaker 1>pursue them because they had the rows, and I'm like,

0:13:51.240 --> 0:13:53.400
<v Speaker 1>I'm not going to pursue you. Ay, I'm not interested

0:13:53.400 --> 0:13:55.600
<v Speaker 1>in you, And be like, if this someone is interested

0:13:55.600 --> 0:13:57.120
<v Speaker 1>in I would have, but I was I'm like, I'm

0:13:57.120 --> 0:14:00.160
<v Speaker 1>not interested in you. I'm not gonna pursue you. Like

0:14:00.200 --> 0:14:02.480
<v Speaker 1>if I really like someone, I'll put in more effort.

0:14:03.520 --> 0:14:07.000
<v Speaker 1>I want to be pursued. My question is I feel

0:14:07.040 --> 0:14:10.120
<v Speaker 1>like a lot of people out there are find it

0:14:10.160 --> 0:14:14.240
<v Speaker 1>difficult to differentiate between someone not interested in someone playing

0:14:14.280 --> 0:14:18.240
<v Speaker 1>hard to get. So from your perspective, Kelsey, what are

0:14:18.280 --> 0:14:20.480
<v Speaker 1>some of the things that you do that, like do

0:14:20.560 --> 0:14:22.200
<v Speaker 1>you play hard to get? Do you know any girls

0:14:22.280 --> 0:14:24.640
<v Speaker 1>that play hard to get? I know a lot of

0:14:24.640 --> 0:14:26.680
<v Speaker 1>girls that play hard to get and I think I

0:14:27.960 --> 0:14:30.520
<v Speaker 1>need start taking I need to start taking notes from them,

0:14:30.560 --> 0:14:33.560
<v Speaker 1>because no, no, no, I like your approach way better.

0:14:34.680 --> 0:14:38.800
<v Speaker 1>You're forthcoming, you're honest. I am, so I'm very upfront.

0:14:38.880 --> 0:14:42.440
<v Speaker 1>So the last person I was talking to before we

0:14:42.520 --> 0:14:46.440
<v Speaker 1>even met up, I was like, if we're doing distance,

0:14:46.680 --> 0:14:50.200
<v Speaker 1>this is what I expect, and like, I'm not saying

0:14:50.200 --> 0:14:53.720
<v Speaker 1>we're dating, but I have self respect for myself and

0:14:53.920 --> 0:14:56.120
<v Speaker 1>I don't want to If you're gonna be talking to

0:14:56.120 --> 0:14:58.200
<v Speaker 1>other people, that's fine, but just take me out of

0:14:58.240 --> 0:15:02.800
<v Speaker 1>the equation, you know, Like I'm very upfront with how

0:15:02.840 --> 0:15:05.280
<v Speaker 1>I want to progress things, or like I want to

0:15:06.440 --> 0:15:08.720
<v Speaker 1>see where things go because I feel like when you

0:15:08.800 --> 0:15:11.880
<v Speaker 1>mix so many people into the mix, it just gets confusing.

0:15:12.280 --> 0:15:18.400
<v Speaker 1>You can't fully invest in someone. Um, and that backfire.

0:15:18.480 --> 0:15:20.080
<v Speaker 1>So that's why I'm like, maybe I need to start

0:15:20.960 --> 0:15:23.080
<v Speaker 1>Why did that? Why did that backfire? You don't have

0:15:23.080 --> 0:15:27.760
<v Speaker 1>to go into too many details, but I'm curious, Um,

0:15:27.920 --> 0:15:31.760
<v Speaker 1>we just weren't on the same page even though I

0:15:31.760 --> 0:15:35.520
<v Speaker 1>had had that conversation. He claims we never did, and like,

0:15:36.160 --> 0:15:41.400
<v Speaker 1>you guys are stupid, So it's pretty safe to assume

0:15:42.240 --> 0:15:48.360
<v Speaker 1>you given this the dilemma of we either talk just

0:15:48.480 --> 0:15:51.160
<v Speaker 1>us too, or you can go out and date other people.

0:15:51.200 --> 0:15:53.680
<v Speaker 1>And he chose to go talk to other people. Yes,

0:15:53.920 --> 0:15:56.560
<v Speaker 1>well this is this is my thing. If I'm in

0:15:56.600 --> 0:16:00.520
<v Speaker 1>the same city as you, it's it's a lot easier

0:16:00.560 --> 0:16:03.240
<v Speaker 1>to like, I understand if you're seeing other people, if

0:16:03.280 --> 0:16:08.120
<v Speaker 1>we're doing distance like that takes a lot of time, effort,

0:16:08.240 --> 0:16:13.520
<v Speaker 1>money into pursuing something. And I'm like, I've already taken

0:16:13.640 --> 0:16:15.800
<v Speaker 1>enough time off dating, Like I'm not going to just

0:16:15.920 --> 0:16:18.120
<v Speaker 1>go have a fling with you for a weekend and

0:16:18.160 --> 0:16:20.160
<v Speaker 1>then you do whatever you want when I'm not there

0:16:20.800 --> 0:16:22.720
<v Speaker 1>and then you come and visit me. Like, that's just

0:16:22.800 --> 0:16:26.720
<v Speaker 1>not how it's gonna work. So before he even came

0:16:26.760 --> 0:16:31.160
<v Speaker 1>to Nashville, I was like, Hey, if you want to

0:16:31.160 --> 0:16:35.480
<v Speaker 1>see other people, that's fine, stay where you are, and

0:16:35.600 --> 0:16:38.960
<v Speaker 1>just don't bring me into the equation. You want to

0:16:38.960 --> 0:16:40.920
<v Speaker 1>know why. I I've always agreed with that, but I've

0:16:40.920 --> 0:16:42.920
<v Speaker 1>never heard someone put it into words as well as

0:16:42.960 --> 0:16:44.440
<v Speaker 1>you just did. And I fully agree. If you're going

0:16:44.520 --> 0:16:48.360
<v Speaker 1>to be doing distance with someone long distance, there is

0:16:48.400 --> 0:16:50.560
<v Speaker 1>a lot more that goes into it. So I fully agree,

0:16:50.600 --> 0:16:52.520
<v Speaker 1>and I'm fully on board with what you're saying. I'm

0:16:52.800 --> 0:16:54.200
<v Speaker 1>I'm when you're camp for all that kind of stuff,

0:16:54.200 --> 0:16:56.360
<v Speaker 1>because you're right, like, if you're gonna put it in

0:16:56.360 --> 0:16:58.360
<v Speaker 1>the effort and spend the money and go through all

0:16:58.520 --> 0:17:00.960
<v Speaker 1>those steps to see someone, it's going to be someone

0:17:01.040 --> 0:17:03.280
<v Speaker 1>that you are like investing in, not just like some

0:17:03.400 --> 0:17:05.359
<v Speaker 1>random person you're gonna cook up with a couple of

0:17:05.359 --> 0:17:07.320
<v Speaker 1>times and then never really see you again until the

0:17:07.359 --> 0:17:09.159
<v Speaker 1>next time you decide to fly out or whatever it is.

0:17:09.200 --> 0:17:11.040
<v Speaker 1>So I fully agree with where you're coming from, and

0:17:11.080 --> 0:17:12.840
<v Speaker 1>I'm proud of you for putting your foot down to yeah,

0:17:12.880 --> 0:17:15.000
<v Speaker 1>hell yeah, that's It's a hard thing to do sometimes.

0:17:15.680 --> 0:17:18.160
<v Speaker 1>I think taking the year two years off of dating

0:17:18.240 --> 0:17:21.680
<v Speaker 1>like really helped because it's just like I'm just over

0:17:21.920 --> 0:17:25.720
<v Speaker 1>the games. Well, now that you're in your thirties, you know,

0:17:25.760 --> 0:17:27.480
<v Speaker 1>it's like you know a lot more what you want.

0:17:27.720 --> 0:17:29.520
<v Speaker 1>I think everyone can kind of speak to that to

0:17:29.680 --> 0:17:31.359
<v Speaker 1>Jared and I are both in our thirties, and I

0:17:31.359 --> 0:17:34.040
<v Speaker 1>feel like the person I was in my twenties is uh, well,

0:17:34.080 --> 0:17:35.600
<v Speaker 1>I still I am an idiot, but the person and

0:17:36.160 --> 0:17:39.000
<v Speaker 1>I wasn't my twenties wasn't even bigger idiot. So I

0:17:39.040 --> 0:17:41.000
<v Speaker 1>think as long as we start to like bring that

0:17:41.160 --> 0:17:43.520
<v Speaker 1>the idiosity down as much as we can, the thirties

0:17:43.520 --> 0:17:44.760
<v Speaker 1>is a big chip up. So I'm proud of you.

0:17:44.760 --> 0:17:46.000
<v Speaker 1>I think that you're doing great, and I think that

0:17:46.000 --> 0:17:48.880
<v Speaker 1>you should keep doing and hopefully, like Jared said earlier,

0:17:48.920 --> 0:17:51.520
<v Speaker 1>what was it a Mama me a moment? Jared, Mama

0:17:51.600 --> 0:17:56.600
<v Speaker 1>miya for the europe guy? Oh no, I said, p

0:17:56.760 --> 0:17:59.479
<v Speaker 1>S I love you, ps, I love you. These wrong coms, man,

0:17:59.480 --> 0:18:01.440
<v Speaker 1>they'll blend together for me. Hopefully we have a p S.

0:18:01.520 --> 0:18:03.439
<v Speaker 1>I Love you moment and you can be reunited with

0:18:03.480 --> 0:18:07.600
<v Speaker 1>the the what's what's the place? The mecan Us guy. Yeah,

0:18:07.760 --> 0:18:09.680
<v Speaker 1>I don't really want to be reunited with him. It

0:18:09.760 --> 0:18:13.520
<v Speaker 1>was just like another Meconos man. Did you go to

0:18:13.640 --> 0:18:17.000
<v Speaker 1>Did you go to Lindsay Lohan's day club in Mecanos? No?

0:18:17.160 --> 0:18:20.040
<v Speaker 1>I think it's closed. Okay, I wasn't sure, but I

0:18:20.080 --> 0:18:22.760
<v Speaker 1>just remember hearing so much about it. Yeah. I think

0:18:22.800 --> 0:18:26.800
<v Speaker 1>she had a show actually about it, right right right, Well,

0:18:27.040 --> 0:18:29.080
<v Speaker 1>maybe we'll reopen one day. Um. I've always wanted to

0:18:29.119 --> 0:18:30.880
<v Speaker 1>go to Meconos. I have not had the chance too yet,

0:18:30.880 --> 0:18:32.679
<v Speaker 1>but I'm very jealous that Anyways, we're gonna take one

0:18:32.760 --> 0:18:36.440
<v Speaker 1>quick break. Um, we're gonna jump into our guest and Chared.

0:18:36.480 --> 0:18:40.360
<v Speaker 1>Who's our guest again? It is Brett Robinson from TikTok.

0:18:40.960 --> 0:18:43.480
<v Speaker 1>The thirst trap King is what I'm dubbing him as

0:18:43.520 --> 0:18:45.199
<v Speaker 1>I apparently, I guess, I don't know. I looked at

0:18:45.200 --> 0:18:47.439
<v Speaker 1>one of his tiktoks and he was shut listening it. Uh,

0:18:47.480 --> 0:18:49.080
<v Speaker 1>And I gotta say that the guy's got great traps.

0:18:49.080 --> 0:19:02.359
<v Speaker 1>So stick through this break. We'll be right back, all right,

0:19:02.359 --> 0:19:04.919
<v Speaker 1>welcome back to help I suck at dating, Dean, myself

0:19:05.000 --> 0:19:08.080
<v Speaker 1>Kelsey with a very special guest. You know him if

0:19:08.080 --> 0:19:10.199
<v Speaker 1>you are a fan of Big Brother, you definitely know

0:19:10.280 --> 0:19:12.440
<v Speaker 1>him from back in two thousand eighteen. And also he's

0:19:12.560 --> 0:19:15.280
<v Speaker 1>very popular on TikTok. We actually just watched a couple

0:19:15.280 --> 0:19:17.520
<v Speaker 1>of your TikTok's, Brett, and we really need to give

0:19:17.800 --> 0:19:21.360
<v Speaker 1>Kelsey some pointers, and me too, because I suck on TikTok. Dean,

0:19:21.359 --> 0:19:24.200
<v Speaker 1>are you on tick talk? I am on the tick

0:19:24.320 --> 0:19:26.840
<v Speaker 1>as the kids. Well, we probably could all use some

0:19:26.880 --> 0:19:29.480
<v Speaker 1>pointers right here. So it is Brett Robinson. Brett, how

0:19:29.520 --> 0:19:31.120
<v Speaker 1>you doing, buddy? Thanks for coming on. Help I suck

0:19:31.119 --> 0:19:34.600
<v Speaker 1>at dating. Hey, guys. I'm doing great, super excited to

0:19:34.640 --> 0:19:37.119
<v Speaker 1>be here and happy to help you guys with your TikTok's.

0:19:37.119 --> 0:19:40.919
<v Speaker 1>And I guess dating lives. Yeah, well you know, we

0:19:40.960 --> 0:19:43.240
<v Speaker 1>suck at dating obviously, so a lot of your TikTok's

0:19:43.240 --> 0:19:47.160
<v Speaker 1>are about dating. They're about falling in love. So, first

0:19:47.200 --> 0:19:51.119
<v Speaker 1>of all, are you single? I am single? Yes, Okay.

0:19:51.160 --> 0:19:54.960
<v Speaker 1>Do you meet a lot of people on TikTok um?

0:19:55.200 --> 0:20:00.439
<v Speaker 1>Actually no? So this is like a weird Like the

0:20:00.520 --> 0:20:04.800
<v Speaker 1>reason I like TikTok now is because it's like, I

0:20:04.800 --> 0:20:07.960
<v Speaker 1>feel like Instagram became the Facebook, where like everyone's parents

0:20:07.960 --> 0:20:11.000
<v Speaker 1>and everyone's aunts and uncles and like extended cousins and

0:20:11.040 --> 0:20:13.240
<v Speaker 1>like everyone in the world that you knew was there.

0:20:13.840 --> 0:20:15.560
<v Speaker 1>And I feel like when you're on Instagram, you're like

0:20:15.640 --> 0:20:18.439
<v Speaker 1>in a box, like this is what socially acceptable, this

0:20:18.480 --> 0:20:20.320
<v Speaker 1>is what like I'm allowed to post, like this is

0:20:20.359 --> 0:20:22.120
<v Speaker 1>what I'm gonna think of if so and so takes

0:20:22.160 --> 0:20:24.400
<v Speaker 1>a look at this. And then I got on TikTok

0:20:24.480 --> 0:20:26.720
<v Speaker 1>and I didn't follow anyone because I didn't know anyone

0:20:26.720 --> 0:20:29.760
<v Speaker 1>on TikTok, So I just started posting whatever I organically

0:20:29.800 --> 0:20:32.879
<v Speaker 1>wanted to post and just didn't care what anyone had

0:20:32.920 --> 0:20:35.879
<v Speaker 1>to think about it. I don't know if I answered

0:20:35.880 --> 0:20:37.720
<v Speaker 1>your question at all. There, No you did. I was

0:20:37.760 --> 0:20:42.320
<v Speaker 1>just curious about like because it I think of like Instagram,

0:20:42.440 --> 0:20:44.760
<v Speaker 1>like sliding into the d m s is such a

0:20:44.800 --> 0:20:48.280
<v Speaker 1>common phrase. I'm curious if there's something equivalent to that

0:20:48.359 --> 0:20:52.760
<v Speaker 1>on TikTok Um. I really like, I think I only

0:20:52.800 --> 0:20:57.000
<v Speaker 1>follow like like like thirty people, so I don't really

0:20:57.040 --> 0:20:58.760
<v Speaker 1>slid and up. My d ms are not open on

0:20:58.800 --> 0:21:01.360
<v Speaker 1>TikTok I don't. I don't use it like that because

0:21:02.000 --> 0:21:04.040
<v Speaker 1>then I get in like I've there was a point

0:21:04.040 --> 0:21:05.600
<v Speaker 1>in time where I followed a lot of people and

0:21:05.640 --> 0:21:07.679
<v Speaker 1>I started on following people because I was two in

0:21:07.720 --> 0:21:10.040
<v Speaker 1>my head when I was posting about things like what

0:21:10.119 --> 0:21:13.159
<v Speaker 1>would this person think? And I love just having like

0:21:13.240 --> 0:21:16.480
<v Speaker 1>completely on completely raw, like I want to post this

0:21:16.520 --> 0:21:18.520
<v Speaker 1>because this is how I feel or I think this

0:21:18.600 --> 0:21:21.439
<v Speaker 1>is super relatable where I really like this content and

0:21:21.480 --> 0:21:23.600
<v Speaker 1>I don't really care what anyone has to think about it.

0:21:24.800 --> 0:21:26.600
<v Speaker 1>Yeah that's fair, But I got I got a question

0:21:26.640 --> 0:21:29.800
<v Speaker 1>for you. So you were on Big Brother, right, I was,

0:21:30.520 --> 0:21:33.040
<v Speaker 1>how did how did that go? I've never really watched

0:21:33.040 --> 0:21:35.199
<v Speaker 1>Big Brother, but I've always been like so intrigued by

0:21:35.240 --> 0:21:37.160
<v Speaker 1>it seems like such a fun experience, but like also

0:21:37.280 --> 0:21:41.360
<v Speaker 1>such a mindful that's all very accurate. It was probably

0:21:41.400 --> 0:21:43.920
<v Speaker 1>the best worst time that I ever had. Like I

0:21:43.960 --> 0:21:45.960
<v Speaker 1>don't regret it at all, But it's kind of like

0:21:45.960 --> 0:21:48.640
<v Speaker 1>going to the gym. It's like you're gone your way there.

0:21:48.720 --> 0:21:50.959
<v Speaker 1>It sucks while you're there. It sucks, but like if

0:21:51.000 --> 0:21:53.440
<v Speaker 1>you do really well, you feel really good about it afterwards,

0:21:54.000 --> 0:21:55.800
<v Speaker 1>or like if you ever like pledged a frattorney, or

0:21:55.800 --> 0:21:57.800
<v Speaker 1>if you ever like boot camp for the military, or

0:21:57.800 --> 0:22:00.840
<v Speaker 1>if you ever played up varsity you from a freshman,

0:22:01.480 --> 0:22:04.880
<v Speaker 1>like it sucks, but it's like really such an amazing

0:22:04.880 --> 0:22:07.280
<v Speaker 1>experience and you grow so much from it. It was

0:22:08.080 --> 0:22:10.760
<v Speaker 1>the craziest thing that I've ever done, And you don't

0:22:10.760 --> 0:22:13.160
<v Speaker 1>know what you're gonna do until you're actually there. Like

0:22:13.520 --> 0:22:15.560
<v Speaker 1>I had no clue that I was gonna stand up

0:22:15.600 --> 0:22:19.040
<v Speaker 1>and say like these crazy as speeches or like throw

0:22:19.160 --> 0:22:22.359
<v Speaker 1>someone under the bus. And it seems easy when you're watching,

0:22:22.440 --> 0:22:24.440
<v Speaker 1>Like when you're watching, you're like, oh, that's easy, Like

0:22:24.480 --> 0:22:26.879
<v Speaker 1>I would totally have done this. You get there and

0:22:26.920 --> 0:22:28.840
<v Speaker 1>you're like in the moment your face to face with

0:22:28.880 --> 0:22:31.440
<v Speaker 1>someone and you have a lady with pink hair screaming

0:22:31.480 --> 0:22:37.920
<v Speaker 1>with popular face. You're like, holy sh this escalated quickly. Yeah,

0:22:38.080 --> 0:22:40.199
<v Speaker 1>that's how I feel. Whenever I wanted Survivor, I'm always like, oh,

0:22:40.240 --> 0:22:42.119
<v Speaker 1>you guys are so stupid. I know everything that's going on,

0:22:42.160 --> 0:22:43.480
<v Speaker 1>but if I ever actually be on the show, I

0:22:43.480 --> 0:22:46.120
<v Speaker 1>would have absolutely no clue what's going on. Um, when

0:22:46.119 --> 0:22:47.639
<v Speaker 1>you were on Big Brother, did you leave with a

0:22:47.720 --> 0:22:49.160
<v Speaker 1>love interest or did you have one during the show

0:22:49.240 --> 0:22:51.520
<v Speaker 1>or anything like that. No, you know what, man, So like,

0:22:52.320 --> 0:22:53.720
<v Speaker 1>at the end of the day, it's a game, right,

0:22:53.960 --> 0:22:56.680
<v Speaker 1>Like the whole like the whole, like the whole fan

0:22:56.800 --> 0:23:00.399
<v Speaker 1>base of Big Brother is lie, cheat, steal, play the

0:23:00.480 --> 0:23:07.159
<v Speaker 1>game your way to the end. Okay, that's exactly what

0:23:07.200 --> 0:23:09.240
<v Speaker 1>it is. Though. So my game was flirting. I was like,

0:23:09.240 --> 0:23:11.119
<v Speaker 1>I just want to be the most Like, I want

0:23:11.200 --> 0:23:13.760
<v Speaker 1>to be so loved that when someone has to go

0:23:13.760 --> 0:23:15.399
<v Speaker 1>in that room to vote me out, that they just

0:23:15.440 --> 0:23:18.080
<v Speaker 1>like feel so gut wrenched that they can't so like,

0:23:18.200 --> 0:23:22.359
<v Speaker 1>I flirted with the girls, I got bromanced with the guys.

0:23:22.600 --> 0:23:25.479
<v Speaker 1>I just wanted to be the most lovable guy. Um,

0:23:25.600 --> 0:23:27.560
<v Speaker 1>but I was. I guess I had my walls up

0:23:27.600 --> 0:23:30.359
<v Speaker 1>because you don't really know what anyone's ulterior motive is. Like,

0:23:30.720 --> 0:23:33.440
<v Speaker 1>no matter what someone tells you your face, everybody's lying

0:23:33.480 --> 0:23:36.000
<v Speaker 1>to your face the entire game. Everybody tells you that

0:23:36.040 --> 0:23:38.560
<v Speaker 1>they're voting for you to stay. Guess what every single

0:23:38.560 --> 0:23:41.320
<v Speaker 1>week that was a lie. That was It wasn't a

0:23:41.400 --> 0:23:44.959
<v Speaker 1>unanimous vote to stay. So you don't really trust anyone.

0:23:45.000 --> 0:23:48.640
<v Speaker 1>And I didn't feel comfortable enough opening up on live

0:23:48.720 --> 0:23:51.480
<v Speaker 1>television and just like having my heart shattered for someone

0:23:51.480 --> 0:23:54.040
<v Speaker 1>who was using you for a half million dollars. If

0:23:54.080 --> 0:23:56.960
<v Speaker 1>you wanted me, you can call me afterwards. Yeah to

0:23:57.000 --> 0:23:59.280
<v Speaker 1>good approach. So before we going on a Big Brother,

0:23:59.320 --> 0:24:01.400
<v Speaker 1>you were in cyber security, right, do you still work

0:24:01.400 --> 0:24:05.240
<v Speaker 1>in cybersecurity? I do? Yeah? Oh say nice. So you

0:24:05.240 --> 0:24:06.480
<v Speaker 1>you're you're one of the few people that go on

0:24:06.520 --> 0:24:08.000
<v Speaker 1>reality to well, not one of the few, I'm sure

0:24:08.000 --> 0:24:11.280
<v Speaker 1>there are plenty and plenty, uh present company excluded. I

0:24:11.280 --> 0:24:13.399
<v Speaker 1>would say that go on reality TV and then go

0:24:13.440 --> 0:24:15.800
<v Speaker 1>back to their careers afterwards. That's great. I did a

0:24:15.800 --> 0:24:18.399
<v Speaker 1>little trend. So I was a cybersecurity engineer prior to

0:24:18.440 --> 0:24:21.040
<v Speaker 1>Big Brother, and then I moved into an account executive role,

0:24:21.080 --> 0:24:23.480
<v Speaker 1>so I sell what I used to be an engineer

0:24:23.480 --> 0:24:26.199
<v Speaker 1>of prior, but I'm still in the Yeah, oh so

0:24:26.200 --> 0:24:28.920
<v Speaker 1>you're probably great for like demos and stuff like that. Yeah,

0:24:28.960 --> 0:24:31.959
<v Speaker 1>that's exactly what I do. Nice dude, that's awesome. So

0:24:32.040 --> 0:24:34.760
<v Speaker 1>you were on after being on Big Brother, what you

0:24:34.760 --> 0:24:37.760
<v Speaker 1>want to do reality TV? Again? The way that I

0:24:37.800 --> 0:24:40.520
<v Speaker 1>look at reality TV is it's no different and if

0:24:40.520 --> 0:24:42.800
<v Speaker 1>it head hunter hit me up for another job, I

0:24:42.840 --> 0:24:45.840
<v Speaker 1>am always open to a conversation for another opportunity. If

0:24:45.880 --> 0:24:49.840
<v Speaker 1>I think that that opportunity is better than my current situation,

0:24:50.240 --> 0:24:52.919
<v Speaker 1>I will absolutely do it. I've chatted with tons of

0:24:52.960 --> 0:24:55.560
<v Speaker 1>other shows. I've chatted with tons of other jobs, and

0:24:55.600 --> 0:24:57.840
<v Speaker 1>it just at it's it's all about timing. So like

0:24:58.119 --> 0:25:00.439
<v Speaker 1>when I did Big Brother, I was already on my

0:25:00.480 --> 0:25:02.320
<v Speaker 1>way out the door in the position that I was in,

0:25:02.520 --> 0:25:04.879
<v Speaker 1>I was leaving. I got frustrated at a manager that

0:25:04.960 --> 0:25:07.040
<v Speaker 1>sucked at the time. They hit me with a super

0:25:07.119 --> 0:25:10.199
<v Speaker 1>unique opportunity, and I was like, you know what, screw it,

0:25:10.280 --> 0:25:12.920
<v Speaker 1>Like let's do it. And then I ended up going

0:25:13.000 --> 0:25:15.640
<v Speaker 1>back in and getting a different manager and doing doing

0:25:15.680 --> 0:25:18.440
<v Speaker 1>different stuff. But that's the way that I see It's

0:25:18.440 --> 0:25:20.760
<v Speaker 1>actually that's actually kind of been something that's been like

0:25:21.080 --> 0:25:23.959
<v Speaker 1>it's bitten me in the butt with future jobs was

0:25:24.000 --> 0:25:25.879
<v Speaker 1>they were always worried. They're like, well, if we hire you,

0:25:25.880 --> 0:25:28.359
<v Speaker 1>we're just gonna bail and like go do another TV show.

0:25:29.160 --> 0:25:31.679
<v Speaker 1>And the way that I look at it and you're like,

0:25:31.720 --> 0:25:35.399
<v Speaker 1>well yeah, well, I mean it's no different than if

0:25:35.520 --> 0:25:37.400
<v Speaker 1>if another company hits me up and goes Brett, I'm

0:25:37.400 --> 0:25:39.760
<v Speaker 1>gonna double your salary. You can bet your sweet ass

0:25:39.760 --> 0:25:43.320
<v Speaker 1>I'm walking like I'm definitely gonna go. But it's it's

0:25:43.359 --> 0:25:46.800
<v Speaker 1>completely opportunity driven. I've also talked to plenty of shows

0:25:46.800 --> 0:25:49.600
<v Speaker 1>that wanted me, and the terms were just so terrible

0:25:49.600 --> 0:25:51.919
<v Speaker 1>and horrible that I was like, dude, I like I

0:25:51.960 --> 0:25:54.280
<v Speaker 1>don't need this, Like I really don't. Like I'm open

0:25:54.280 --> 0:25:55.720
<v Speaker 1>to it and it's cool, but I don't have to

0:25:55.760 --> 0:25:57.520
<v Speaker 1>do this. Are you at liberty to say what show?

0:25:58.119 --> 0:25:59.600
<v Speaker 1>What kind of the shows would you be interested in doing?

0:25:59.640 --> 0:26:02.200
<v Speaker 1>Maybe say that instead, what kind of shows that would

0:26:02.200 --> 0:26:06.159
<v Speaker 1>be like really pretty open? I'm really pretty open to

0:26:06.280 --> 0:26:09.520
<v Speaker 1>most shows, like I mean, like within reason, like I'm

0:26:09.520 --> 0:26:12.919
<v Speaker 1>not doing Naked and Afraid or Dating naked or like

0:26:13.040 --> 0:26:15.159
<v Speaker 1>in the UK they got like this crazy show that

0:26:15.240 --> 0:26:20.600
<v Speaker 1>like you show your genitals before the world in the UK,

0:26:20.720 --> 0:26:22.600
<v Speaker 1>I forget I want to say, I forget the name

0:26:22.600 --> 0:26:25.119
<v Speaker 1>of the show, but I swear to God you have

0:26:25.240 --> 0:26:27.960
<v Speaker 1>like you have like a thing blocking you from the

0:26:27.960 --> 0:26:30.680
<v Speaker 1>waist up and you only can see your genitals. There's

0:26:30.720 --> 0:26:32.560
<v Speaker 1>five people standing in front of you and you can see.

0:26:32.600 --> 0:26:35.000
<v Speaker 1>It's not blurred at all. It is not blurred. You

0:26:35.040 --> 0:26:38.600
<v Speaker 1>can see everything. And someone stands on stage and they

0:26:38.600 --> 0:26:41.080
<v Speaker 1>have to pick who they want based on that. It's

0:26:41.080 --> 0:26:45.840
<v Speaker 1>called Naked Attraction. Naked Attraction, that's the show. I think

0:26:46.320 --> 0:26:48.119
<v Speaker 1>Kelsey in that case, I think it's good that you

0:26:48.119 --> 0:26:49.760
<v Speaker 1>live into the rocks because no one wants well, I

0:26:49.800 --> 0:26:51.600
<v Speaker 1>guess people want to see it. It's on television, so

0:26:52.560 --> 0:26:55.119
<v Speaker 1>watching it. Yeah, I would do anything. Like I like

0:26:55.200 --> 0:26:57.679
<v Speaker 1>the competition shows because like I did pretty well on

0:26:57.760 --> 0:26:59.359
<v Speaker 1>Big Brother, I think I would do well on a

0:26:59.400 --> 0:27:04.399
<v Speaker 1>competition show. Um, I've never done a dating show. It

0:27:04.440 --> 0:27:06.360
<v Speaker 1>depends on the format, man, Like some of those dating

0:27:06.400 --> 0:27:08.720
<v Speaker 1>shows are pretty whack. But there are something that I

0:27:08.720 --> 0:27:10.840
<v Speaker 1>would be open to doing, Like I love Love Island.

0:27:11.040 --> 0:27:13.080
<v Speaker 1>Like I think Love Island is like the coolest show

0:27:13.119 --> 0:27:16.240
<v Speaker 1>in the way. The UK version is like my favorite. Yeah,

0:27:16.400 --> 0:27:18.919
<v Speaker 1>let's let's pivot real quick and talk more about your TikTok.

0:27:18.920 --> 0:27:21.360
<v Speaker 1>I've got questions for you. So you talk a lot

0:27:21.480 --> 0:27:24.840
<v Speaker 1>about like dating and stuff on TikTok, right or not

0:27:24.880 --> 0:27:27.760
<v Speaker 1>like not like dating per se, but more like how

0:27:27.800 --> 0:27:30.560
<v Speaker 1>would you like how would you describe it? The way

0:27:30.560 --> 0:27:34.600
<v Speaker 1>that I describe it is just it's relatable. Like it's

0:27:34.640 --> 0:27:37.040
<v Speaker 1>like really for me, like what resonates with someone that

0:27:37.080 --> 0:27:39.600
<v Speaker 1>they're like, I love this TikTok so much that I

0:27:39.640 --> 0:27:41.719
<v Speaker 1>want to like it or I want to comment on it,

0:27:41.880 --> 0:27:45.280
<v Speaker 1>or I want to share it. Is just like I

0:27:45.320 --> 0:27:47.320
<v Speaker 1>think everyone in the world has been through heartbreak at

0:27:47.320 --> 0:27:50.160
<v Speaker 1>some point in their life at some or or let

0:27:50.200 --> 0:27:54.240
<v Speaker 1>down or confusion and communication or something. And I just

0:27:54.320 --> 0:27:56.840
<v Speaker 1>like to be totally honest, man. When I made the

0:27:56.840 --> 0:27:58.879
<v Speaker 1>first one and I was like, this is kind of relatable,

0:27:59.119 --> 0:28:01.400
<v Speaker 1>and then I tried to branch away from it and

0:28:01.480 --> 0:28:04.479
<v Speaker 1>nothing else would do well, and it was like I

0:28:04.560 --> 0:28:07.000
<v Speaker 1>was like, if this is what the people want, Like

0:28:07.040 --> 0:28:10.520
<v Speaker 1>I guess, I guess it's just relatable for sure. Yeah,

0:28:10.560 --> 0:28:14.879
<v Speaker 1>idealized romance definitely sells well on those platforms. Um do

0:28:14.960 --> 0:28:17.080
<v Speaker 1>you ever so? And you said earlier like your d

0:28:17.240 --> 0:28:19.960
<v Speaker 1>ms are closed on TikTok. So do you ever like,

0:28:20.119 --> 0:28:22.240
<v Speaker 1>let's say you're out at a bar or something like

0:28:22.280 --> 0:28:23.800
<v Speaker 1>that and you meet someone, have you ever had anyone

0:28:23.840 --> 0:28:26.040
<v Speaker 1>like approach you and be like I felt like I

0:28:26.040 --> 0:28:27.680
<v Speaker 1>love your tiktoks, like I follow you on TikTok, or

0:28:28.000 --> 0:28:30.920
<v Speaker 1>that I will say the moment that I felt like

0:28:31.119 --> 0:28:33.760
<v Speaker 1>I made it. I always get to get people to

0:28:33.800 --> 0:28:35.680
<v Speaker 1>be like, oh my god, I love you from big Brother.

0:28:36.160 --> 0:28:38.239
<v Speaker 1>The moment that I had someone come up and they're like,

0:28:38.520 --> 0:28:43.800
<v Speaker 1>I love you from TikTok, I was like, like I

0:28:43.880 --> 0:28:47.080
<v Speaker 1>was like, I don't need Big Brother, Like I made it.

0:28:47.240 --> 0:28:50.560
<v Speaker 1>I have a fan on my own. But yeah, I

0:28:50.640 --> 0:28:53.040
<v Speaker 1>have definitely had people come up to me that recognize

0:28:53.080 --> 0:28:55.600
<v Speaker 1>me from TikTok. Yeah, why don't do you ever do

0:28:55.640 --> 0:28:58.720
<v Speaker 1>like like collaborations, Like because there are like other TikTok

0:28:58.720 --> 0:29:01.440
<v Speaker 1>content creators out there right to, like, why don't you

0:29:01.480 --> 0:29:04.360
<v Speaker 1>like team up with one of these other TikTok creators

0:29:04.440 --> 0:29:06.640
<v Speaker 1>and then you guys become like a super couple of sorts.

0:29:06.960 --> 0:29:09.280
<v Speaker 1>To be honest, for the most part, it was just

0:29:09.360 --> 0:29:11.959
<v Speaker 1>because I lived in locations that didn't have a ton

0:29:12.040 --> 0:29:15.600
<v Speaker 1>of creators and like, like I previously lived in Boston.

0:29:15.640 --> 0:29:18.240
<v Speaker 1>I previously lived in Austin, and I lived in Vegas

0:29:18.280 --> 0:29:20.160
<v Speaker 1>for a little bit. I only recently moved to l

0:29:20.200 --> 0:29:23.200
<v Speaker 1>A on Halloween. Like I've been here a super short

0:29:23.200 --> 0:29:27.360
<v Speaker 1>period of time. I have recently done some collaborations, but

0:29:27.520 --> 0:29:30.720
<v Speaker 1>that was the first collaboration I've actually ever done. I

0:29:30.720 --> 0:29:33.160
<v Speaker 1>don't know if my TikTok at all, but I did.

0:29:33.200 --> 0:29:34.760
<v Speaker 1>And what was that one? I did right before? But

0:29:34.840 --> 0:29:37.080
<v Speaker 1>I ran out of time, so I didn't get a

0:29:37.080 --> 0:29:38.640
<v Speaker 1>look at a lot of it. Did a tick out.

0:29:38.680 --> 0:29:40.840
<v Speaker 1>If you're familiar with Tanna Mojoe, I did a TikTok.

0:29:40.920 --> 0:29:44.200
<v Speaker 1>But yeah, tiktoks with Tanna Mojoe. I think those are

0:29:44.240 --> 0:29:48.080
<v Speaker 1>my two most two of my three most recent tiktoks.

0:29:48.600 --> 0:29:51.000
<v Speaker 1>My my entire TikTok feed is just like d I

0:29:51.200 --> 0:29:55.080
<v Speaker 1>y stuff and dogs like that's entirely all I get personally,

0:29:55.160 --> 0:30:00.400
<v Speaker 1>like what my TikTok feed is. But it's three of them,

0:30:00.600 --> 0:30:02.600
<v Speaker 1>and it was you with your shirt off, playing like

0:30:02.760 --> 0:30:06.000
<v Speaker 1>a slow song every time. Those are the three that

0:30:06.040 --> 0:30:08.320
<v Speaker 1>we saw. It's it's funny you say that because I

0:30:08.360 --> 0:30:11.880
<v Speaker 1>actually avoid almost at all costs doing any content with

0:30:12.280 --> 0:30:15.360
<v Speaker 1>my shirt off because it typically doesn't move as well.

0:30:15.960 --> 0:30:18.000
<v Speaker 1>It really doesn't, because why do you think that is?

0:30:18.600 --> 0:30:23.080
<v Speaker 1>I'll tell you exactly, because of your audiences guys, and

0:30:23.120 --> 0:30:25.400
<v Speaker 1>if I'm hitting the heart with something relatable, like like

0:30:25.480 --> 0:30:27.840
<v Speaker 1>something like I don't always say like when she broke

0:30:27.880 --> 0:30:29.360
<v Speaker 1>your heart or when she did this, I'm just like

0:30:29.360 --> 0:30:32.160
<v Speaker 1>when that one person did something like. There are guys

0:30:32.240 --> 0:30:34.280
<v Speaker 1>that relate to that too, but there are some guys

0:30:34.280 --> 0:30:36.640
<v Speaker 1>that are just like like a girl will like another

0:30:36.640 --> 0:30:39.080
<v Speaker 1>girl's bikini photo, a guy will not like another guy's

0:30:39.080 --> 0:30:43.120
<v Speaker 1>photo with a shirt off unless you're like really good friends. Yeah,

0:30:43.480 --> 0:30:45.160
<v Speaker 1>like really good friends. I will say that we did

0:30:45.200 --> 0:30:47.560
<v Speaker 1>watch a couple of TikTok's and I was I was

0:30:47.600 --> 0:30:49.720
<v Speaker 1>going on and on about your traps and how dreaming

0:30:49.720 --> 0:30:54.360
<v Speaker 1>they are, the massive, very good traps that I also.

0:30:54.640 --> 0:30:56.280
<v Speaker 1>The other thing is like you always hear of these

0:30:56.320 --> 0:30:59.160
<v Speaker 1>like like I feel like TikTok is super savage and

0:30:59.200 --> 0:31:01.800
<v Speaker 1>Embarrasson Instagra, I'm like, they'll just delete your account, like

0:31:01.880 --> 0:31:03.720
<v Speaker 1>they just don't like it, Like they'll just get rid

0:31:03.720 --> 0:31:06.280
<v Speaker 1>of it. So I don't know, I always just get

0:31:06.640 --> 0:31:09.400
<v Speaker 1>like nervous that there's what about what about like dating apps?

0:31:09.400 --> 0:31:12.360
<v Speaker 1>Are you on any of those. No, I'm not really

0:31:13.240 --> 0:31:16.680
<v Speaker 1>all right. Maybe I'm like the weirdest freak of this generation.

0:31:16.920 --> 0:31:18.520
<v Speaker 1>And this is just like a part like I have

0:31:18.600 --> 0:31:21.080
<v Speaker 1>nothing against dading apps. I think for like most people, like,

0:31:21.120 --> 0:31:22.840
<v Speaker 1>that's wonderful you moved to a new city when you

0:31:22.880 --> 0:31:26.640
<v Speaker 1>meet someone. In my book, for me, if I can

0:31:26.840 --> 0:31:29.200
<v Speaker 1>if there's a day where I can't go to a

0:31:29.200 --> 0:31:31.520
<v Speaker 1>bar and walk up to a girl that I'm interested

0:31:31.560 --> 0:31:33.720
<v Speaker 1>in just say head, love to get dinner with you,

0:31:34.000 --> 0:31:36.120
<v Speaker 1>then there's something in need that I need to fix

0:31:36.200 --> 0:31:38.080
<v Speaker 1>that I'm so scared that I have to hide behind

0:31:38.080 --> 0:31:42.960
<v Speaker 1>the phone. Yeah, I mean that's that's that sounds logica.

0:31:43.560 --> 0:31:47.000
<v Speaker 1>My most viewed TikTok. This is the difference between me

0:31:47.080 --> 0:31:52.560
<v Speaker 1>and you Bread. It's me in a hotel room watching

0:31:52.560 --> 0:31:56.560
<v Speaker 1>Tom Brady where a backwards snap back and it's that

0:31:57.080 --> 0:32:02.320
<v Speaker 1>oh boner alert. It's a good one. I was very

0:32:02.320 --> 0:32:06.120
<v Speaker 1>proud of that lab Jared. Is that what you're saying, dude,

0:32:06.160 --> 0:32:08.600
<v Speaker 1>I'm down? You let you let me and my wife

0:32:08.600 --> 0:32:11.160
<v Speaker 1>actually know I am down. You know what's funny about

0:32:11.160 --> 0:32:13.920
<v Speaker 1>TikTok and it makes me when I was watching your videos,

0:32:13.720 --> 0:32:17.640
<v Speaker 1>it's crazy because you can put britt I'm sure you've

0:32:17.920 --> 0:32:20.680
<v Speaker 1>you've recognized this is that you can put so much

0:32:20.680 --> 0:32:23.640
<v Speaker 1>effort into a video and really think that it's so

0:32:23.680 --> 0:32:26.040
<v Speaker 1>good and so perfect and you did such a good job,

0:32:26.480 --> 0:32:29.200
<v Speaker 1>and it lays flat. And then you'll do a video

0:32:29.280 --> 0:32:32.880
<v Speaker 1>where it's just a sound over for eight seconds and

0:32:32.920 --> 0:32:35.720
<v Speaker 1>it's literally just like you filming yourself, and that one

0:32:35.760 --> 0:32:38.280
<v Speaker 1>will get a million views, and it's like, what the hell,

0:32:39.200 --> 0:32:43.560
<v Speaker 1>this is ridiculous. I do know exactly what you're talking about.

0:32:43.800 --> 0:32:47.760
<v Speaker 1>I'm definitely familiar with that, and it's just the name

0:32:47.880 --> 0:32:51.200
<v Speaker 1>you Also, the other funny thing about TikTok is you

0:32:51.240 --> 0:32:54.360
<v Speaker 1>never know what side like because if you're doing something polarizing,

0:32:54.600 --> 0:32:57.480
<v Speaker 1>like obviously there's an audience that agrees on one pole,

0:32:57.560 --> 0:33:00.440
<v Speaker 1>or there's an audience that disagrees on another pole, or

0:33:00.560 --> 0:33:02.640
<v Speaker 1>and sometimes I'll do things and I'm like, oh no,

0:33:02.720 --> 0:33:05.520
<v Speaker 1>like people will totally relate to this, and like I'll

0:33:05.520 --> 0:33:07.280
<v Speaker 1>just get a ton of hate from like the polar

0:33:07.280 --> 0:33:09.480
<v Speaker 1>opposite side. So you might just hit a different, like

0:33:09.520 --> 0:33:11.880
<v Speaker 1>a different side of TikTok that you didn't know existed,

0:33:12.240 --> 0:33:14.880
<v Speaker 1>and I'm like, Okay, this was not received appropriately, Like

0:33:14.920 --> 0:33:17.360
<v Speaker 1>I'm gonna just take this down, Like this was misinterpreted.

0:33:17.760 --> 0:33:20.720
<v Speaker 1>So where do you think the future of TikTok lies? Like,

0:33:20.760 --> 0:33:25.040
<v Speaker 1>what what is TikTok in five years? Is it like Instagram,

0:33:25.080 --> 0:33:27.160
<v Speaker 1>you know, where it just completely continues to blow up?

0:33:27.480 --> 0:33:30.040
<v Speaker 1>Is it like, what's the what was the the app

0:33:30.120 --> 0:33:34.080
<v Speaker 1>that blew up last year? Not chat room that he

0:33:34.320 --> 0:33:37.720
<v Speaker 1>was though, um camp fire or something like that. No,

0:33:37.960 --> 0:33:45.320
<v Speaker 1>it was oh house, like clubhouse was the thing and

0:33:45.400 --> 0:33:47.760
<v Speaker 1>now it's nowhere to be found. So do you think

0:33:47.800 --> 0:33:50.080
<v Speaker 1>TikTok is going more in that direction or like in

0:33:50.120 --> 0:33:51.960
<v Speaker 1>the direction of Instagram where it's just going to continue

0:33:52.000 --> 0:33:53.600
<v Speaker 1>going up and up and up and up. I think

0:33:53.600 --> 0:33:56.840
<v Speaker 1>it'll absolutely I think TikTok is absolutely the future. I

0:33:56.880 --> 0:34:00.320
<v Speaker 1>think anyone who's a creator is completely not doing that.

0:34:00.360 --> 0:34:02.800
<v Speaker 1>They're doing themselves a disservice if they're not on it.

0:34:03.160 --> 0:34:06.040
<v Speaker 1>I absolutely think that TikTok, even for like brand collaborations,

0:34:06.400 --> 0:34:09.400
<v Speaker 1>just for like getting an audience, I think TikTok is

0:34:09.440 --> 0:34:12.440
<v Speaker 1>the future. I think the reason that TikTok is absolutely

0:34:12.600 --> 0:34:17.000
<v Speaker 1>killing Instagram is you get personality, like you actually like

0:34:17.360 --> 0:34:19.200
<v Speaker 1>you can only get so much out of photo and

0:34:19.280 --> 0:34:22.520
<v Speaker 1>unless you're an absolute supermodel that like everyone in the

0:34:22.560 --> 0:34:25.520
<v Speaker 1>world just wants to like look and all at You're

0:34:25.520 --> 0:34:30.520
<v Speaker 1>just so limited what you can do within a photo. Yeah,

0:34:30.719 --> 0:34:33.600
<v Speaker 1>thousand percent. It's it's so crazy, man, this whole new

0:34:33.600 --> 0:34:36.799
<v Speaker 1>world of social media. And I'm just trying to just

0:34:36.880 --> 0:34:40.080
<v Speaker 1>post videos of Tom Brady on there, you know. And

0:34:41.320 --> 0:34:43.400
<v Speaker 1>Kelsey just launched her TikTok though, can you give her

0:34:43.400 --> 0:34:48.400
<v Speaker 1>some tips on how she can blow up? Come on?

0:34:48.719 --> 0:34:50.279
<v Speaker 1>So I kind of give you a little bit there,

0:34:50.320 --> 0:34:52.720
<v Speaker 1>like if you have something that if it's not broke,

0:34:52.880 --> 0:34:54.759
<v Speaker 1>don't fix it. Like if you have something it's like

0:34:54.840 --> 0:34:59.440
<v Speaker 1>working and TikTok and it does like keep going with that.

0:34:59.520 --> 0:35:02.080
<v Speaker 1>Like in like I said, I tried to like branch

0:35:02.080 --> 0:35:04.960
<v Speaker 1>away from like doing like like the heart related stuff,

0:35:05.000 --> 0:35:06.440
<v Speaker 1>and every time I did, it would just flop and

0:35:06.480 --> 0:35:09.120
<v Speaker 1>I was like whatever, man, Like I guess this is

0:35:09.200 --> 0:35:13.399
<v Speaker 1>this is my past, this is my journey now. Like heard,

0:35:13.920 --> 0:35:16.040
<v Speaker 1>when you look at a TikTok or when you're making

0:35:16.040 --> 0:35:18.960
<v Speaker 1>a TikTok, you need to sit back and say, what

0:35:19.160 --> 0:35:21.759
<v Speaker 1>is gonna make someone love this so much that like

0:35:21.760 --> 0:35:24.160
<v Speaker 1>would you look at this and send it like texted

0:35:24.200 --> 0:35:26.200
<v Speaker 1>to your best friend or would you look at this

0:35:26.280 --> 0:35:28.840
<v Speaker 1>and like texted or would you tag your like whoever

0:35:28.880 --> 0:35:30.960
<v Speaker 1>you're talking to, if you're if you have a girlfriend

0:35:31.040 --> 0:35:33.160
<v Speaker 1>or boyfriend, whoever it is, like, would you tag them

0:35:33.160 --> 0:35:35.239
<v Speaker 1>in this? And like this is so us, Like what

0:35:35.360 --> 0:35:39.440
<v Speaker 1>would trigger you to share this? Because likes are limited,

0:35:39.800 --> 0:35:42.920
<v Speaker 1>comments don't do as much as you think shares. If

0:35:42.960 --> 0:35:45.359
<v Speaker 1>you can get someone to share a TikTok, that's how.

0:35:45.480 --> 0:35:48.960
<v Speaker 1>That's the difference between like a hundred thousand and like

0:35:49.040 --> 0:35:51.320
<v Speaker 1>a million or two million or three. Like my highest

0:35:51.360 --> 0:35:55.120
<v Speaker 1>TikTok was like binge eating trash food all day and

0:35:55.160 --> 0:35:57.200
<v Speaker 1>I think every mother in the Middle America was like

0:35:57.920 --> 0:35:59.879
<v Speaker 1>I eat oreos during the middle of the day too,

0:36:00.239 --> 0:36:04.560
<v Speaker 1>Like I totally really, Well, there you go if you're

0:36:04.560 --> 0:36:06.680
<v Speaker 1>listening to this, and Kelsey, I hope you're listening to

0:36:06.719 --> 0:36:08.680
<v Speaker 1>because I'm sure you would have to pay for that

0:36:08.719 --> 0:36:10.920
<v Speaker 1>advice anywhere else. So Brett, thank you so much for

0:36:11.000 --> 0:36:13.720
<v Speaker 1>joining us. We appreciate it. Be sure to follow Brett

0:36:13.800 --> 0:36:16.920
<v Speaker 1>on TikTok. Brett, what's your TikTok handle? It is Brett W.

0:36:17.200 --> 0:36:20.960
<v Speaker 1>Robinson on all platforms. Perfect, So if you're listening to this,

0:36:21.000 --> 0:36:23.960
<v Speaker 1>go follow Brett W. Robinson on TikTok on Instagram. I'm

0:36:24.000 --> 0:36:26.640
<v Speaker 1>sure on Twitter as well. Um, we hope it's not

0:36:26.680 --> 0:36:28.560
<v Speaker 1>too long until we see on our TV again. Definitely

0:36:28.600 --> 0:36:30.520
<v Speaker 1>won't be long until we see on TikTok again. Brett,

0:36:30.520 --> 0:36:33.080
<v Speaker 1>thank you so much for joining us. We appreciate it. Thanks, guys,

0:36:33.080 --> 0:36:47.719
<v Speaker 1>you gonna thank you. Thanks Brett. All right, welcome back

0:36:47.760 --> 0:36:50.360
<v Speaker 1>to help I suck at dating. And of course we

0:36:50.440 --> 0:36:52.840
<v Speaker 1>have a very special guest is back with us this week.

0:36:53.880 --> 0:36:57.879
<v Speaker 1>It is your favorite, our favorite. It is Mark. I'm

0:36:57.880 --> 0:37:00.840
<v Speaker 1>gonna screw up your last name, dude, Moletski. Oh my gosh,

0:37:00.880 --> 0:37:03.839
<v Speaker 1>such respect. Um, No, that's not how you say my name.

0:37:03.880 --> 0:37:06.480
<v Speaker 1>But that's okay, but not hold on, hold on, I

0:37:06.520 --> 0:37:10.239
<v Speaker 1>don't how many years have we known each other now?

0:37:10.239 --> 0:37:13.919
<v Speaker 1>Do not? Solid? Three? At least? That's it, Dean, Dean

0:37:14.040 --> 0:37:19.640
<v Speaker 1>nailing it. Hey, listen, I show up on time, okay,

0:37:19.840 --> 0:37:22.240
<v Speaker 1>fair enough. And when we send you on my die

0:37:22.440 --> 0:37:26.560
<v Speaker 1>you know where it is. All right, we'll hop out

0:37:26.560 --> 0:37:29.520
<v Speaker 1>an email. This one strikes me as um somewhat above

0:37:29.520 --> 0:37:31.719
<v Speaker 1>our pay grade. But let's see what I can do

0:37:31.840 --> 0:37:35.400
<v Speaker 1>for Tyler. Tyler says, my girlfriend is struggled with depression

0:37:35.440 --> 0:37:37.400
<v Speaker 1>on and off throughout her life, but recently she's been

0:37:37.440 --> 0:37:40.320
<v Speaker 1>going through a really hard time. She barely sleeps, or

0:37:40.400 --> 0:37:42.480
<v Speaker 1>eats or even speaks to me. I want to be

0:37:42.520 --> 0:37:44.040
<v Speaker 1>there for her, but this is the first time I've

0:37:44.040 --> 0:37:45.640
<v Speaker 1>seen her like this, and I think she needs more

0:37:45.680 --> 0:37:47.560
<v Speaker 1>help than I can give her. Every time I bring

0:37:47.640 --> 0:37:49.360
<v Speaker 1>up the topic of seeing a therapist or going on

0:37:49.400 --> 0:37:51.319
<v Speaker 1>meds again, she says she doesn't want to talk about it.

0:37:51.680 --> 0:37:54.040
<v Speaker 1>I want to respect her boundaries, but I'm starting to

0:37:54.040 --> 0:37:56.799
<v Speaker 1>get concerned. How do I approach having a conversation with

0:37:56.840 --> 0:37:59.399
<v Speaker 1>my girlfriend about getting help for her mental health without

0:37:59.480 --> 0:38:01.680
<v Speaker 1>making her feel a cornered or put on the spot.

0:38:01.760 --> 0:38:05.520
<v Speaker 1>Any advice would help, uh? Well, first and foremost, I

0:38:05.520 --> 0:38:08.680
<v Speaker 1>think it's great that he's even asking this question. Um, Kelsey,

0:38:08.800 --> 0:38:10.080
<v Speaker 1>I want to hear what you think. What do you

0:38:10.120 --> 0:38:14.120
<v Speaker 1>think about this? That's a tough one, UM. I have

0:38:14.280 --> 0:38:18.359
<v Speaker 1>friends and family that struggle with very bad depression, and

0:38:18.560 --> 0:38:24.120
<v Speaker 1>it's never an easy topic to bring up to them. Um.

0:38:24.160 --> 0:38:27.040
<v Speaker 1>But I'm a firm believer, and if someone doesn't want

0:38:27.040 --> 0:38:31.000
<v Speaker 1>to get help, you can't help them. So you can

0:38:31.040 --> 0:38:33.880
<v Speaker 1>be there for them, you can support them, but at

0:38:33.920 --> 0:38:35.879
<v Speaker 1>the end of the day, if they're not wanting to

0:38:35.920 --> 0:38:40.360
<v Speaker 1>get better help themselves, there's only so much you can do. Um,

0:38:40.400 --> 0:38:43.200
<v Speaker 1>So when it comes down to it, you either just

0:38:43.239 --> 0:38:44.680
<v Speaker 1>have to be there for them and love them and

0:38:44.680 --> 0:38:47.360
<v Speaker 1>support them, or you have to make the decision and

0:38:47.360 --> 0:38:50.680
<v Speaker 1>walk away. Yeah. Yeah, I think that's that's pretty good advice.

0:38:50.719 --> 0:38:53.640
<v Speaker 1>What do you think is? I think it's just I

0:38:53.680 --> 0:38:55.760
<v Speaker 1>agree with Mark. This is definitely above our pay grades.

0:38:55.800 --> 0:38:59.280
<v Speaker 1>Like you know, definitely still continue to try to see

0:38:59.719 --> 0:39:04.200
<v Speaker 1>is you can go see a therapist or get some help, um,

0:39:04.440 --> 0:39:06.520
<v Speaker 1>because you know you don't want to see anybody go through,

0:39:06.760 --> 0:39:10.080
<v Speaker 1>especially your significant other. I would say it's something that

0:39:10.160 --> 0:39:12.239
<v Speaker 1>might help Tyler is if you suggest that maybe you

0:39:12.280 --> 0:39:15.840
<v Speaker 1>guys go to therapy together instead of having heard just

0:39:15.920 --> 0:39:18.120
<v Speaker 1>go on her own. Maybe there's some way you can

0:39:18.120 --> 0:39:21.680
<v Speaker 1>suggest about you guys going together and doing this together

0:39:21.760 --> 0:39:27.680
<v Speaker 1>as a couple. Maybe that will entice her to help you.

0:39:28.120 --> 0:39:32.480
<v Speaker 1>Should I answer it? On? Oh God, shall dispute myself.

0:39:32.880 --> 0:39:39.280
<v Speaker 1>Ye see who it is? Come on, I'll just coffee

0:39:39.320 --> 0:39:42.360
<v Speaker 1>house allounge. This is jaredy but help you? Are this

0:39:42.520 --> 0:39:47.000
<v Speaker 1>going fresh today? Yes? We can do it to go

0:39:47.080 --> 0:39:52.280
<v Speaker 1>on her? Oh my gosh, absolutely hold on one second,

0:39:53.840 --> 0:39:55.840
<v Speaker 1>excuse me, folks, I have two two aco to go on?

0:39:56.040 --> 0:40:01.160
<v Speaker 1>Er So talk amongst yourself over wow wow wow. Um. Okay, well,

0:40:01.239 --> 0:40:03.520
<v Speaker 1>Jared's got bigger fish to pry. I guess um. I

0:40:03.560 --> 0:40:06.240
<v Speaker 1>do want to say, though, I agree with what Jared

0:40:06.320 --> 0:40:08.400
<v Speaker 1>is saying, I also really agree with what Kelsey is

0:40:08.400 --> 0:40:10.200
<v Speaker 1>saying to you can't kind of force someone to go

0:40:10.280 --> 0:40:13.520
<v Speaker 1>to therapy. In my personal experience, I've been to therapy

0:40:13.600 --> 0:40:16.600
<v Speaker 1>like three different stints in therapy. The first two were

0:40:16.719 --> 0:40:19.120
<v Speaker 1>urged to buy well, the first one by my parents,

0:40:19.680 --> 0:40:21.320
<v Speaker 1>the second one by my dad and I was like

0:40:21.360 --> 0:40:23.920
<v Speaker 1>a teenager. And then the third one I finally went

0:40:24.000 --> 0:40:25.480
<v Speaker 1>to on my own accord, Like I was the one

0:40:25.520 --> 0:40:28.080
<v Speaker 1>that made the conscious decision to go to therapy, and

0:40:28.160 --> 0:40:31.080
<v Speaker 1>the first two stints like didn't have any benefit whatsoever.

0:40:31.120 --> 0:40:33.040
<v Speaker 1>I hated it. I didn't want to be there. I

0:40:33.080 --> 0:40:35.000
<v Speaker 1>was angry at everyone for making me be there in

0:40:35.040 --> 0:40:36.799
<v Speaker 1>the first place, and you get nothing out of it.

0:40:37.280 --> 0:40:38.840
<v Speaker 1>And then by the time I finally decided that I

0:40:38.880 --> 0:40:40.520
<v Speaker 1>want to go there on my own terms, I like

0:40:40.800 --> 0:40:42.719
<v Speaker 1>benefited so much from it. So I fully agree with

0:40:42.760 --> 0:40:45.959
<v Speaker 1>what Kelsey is saying, like, if you're going against your will,

0:40:46.080 --> 0:40:47.440
<v Speaker 1>you're not really going to get much out of it.

0:40:47.480 --> 0:40:49.359
<v Speaker 1>But then what Jared said, I think was great, like

0:40:49.800 --> 0:40:51.799
<v Speaker 1>suggesting that they go to therapy together. I think is

0:40:51.800 --> 0:40:54.640
<v Speaker 1>a really good solution for that. I do too. My

0:40:54.760 --> 0:40:57.200
<v Speaker 1>question is would this make things better or worse if

0:40:57.200 --> 0:40:59.279
<v Speaker 1>you were to go to someone else who notes or

0:40:59.320 --> 0:41:02.120
<v Speaker 1>like maybe her mom or dad, not to like team

0:41:02.160 --> 0:41:03.880
<v Speaker 1>up an intervention with her, because I feel like that

0:41:03.880 --> 0:41:06.279
<v Speaker 1>would go badly, but maybe gets some advice from them

0:41:06.440 --> 0:41:09.280
<v Speaker 1>because they've probably been through this with her many times

0:41:09.360 --> 0:41:11.600
<v Speaker 1>on what he should do. Is there a way into

0:41:11.600 --> 0:41:13.799
<v Speaker 1>hers there, maybe there's some advice from other people who

0:41:13.880 --> 0:41:16.920
<v Speaker 1>know her. Yeah, I think, Uh, well, Kelsey, what do

0:41:16.920 --> 0:41:22.320
<v Speaker 1>you think? I think that if you trust the family

0:41:23.239 --> 0:41:26.040
<v Speaker 1>and their opinion and know that they have her best

0:41:26.040 --> 0:41:29.600
<v Speaker 1>interests in your best interests at heart, then absolutely should

0:41:29.600 --> 0:41:31.960
<v Speaker 1>go and try to figure out a way to make

0:41:31.960 --> 0:41:36.640
<v Speaker 1>this situation better. But I've personally been in situations where um,

0:41:36.680 --> 0:41:41.080
<v Speaker 1>I don't get along with my significant other's family, and

0:41:41.120 --> 0:41:43.840
<v Speaker 1>then it can cause more of an issue. So I

0:41:43.880 --> 0:41:47.640
<v Speaker 1>think it's all based off the circumstance. Yeah, and I

0:41:47.680 --> 0:41:49.600
<v Speaker 1>will say too, I think that part of the one

0:41:49.600 --> 0:41:51.919
<v Speaker 1>of the benefits of having a therapist is that they're

0:41:52.080 --> 0:41:54.440
<v Speaker 1>so far disconnected from the situation. So they can kind

0:41:54.440 --> 0:41:57.719
<v Speaker 1>of give like unbiased impartial advice, which is huge. Like

0:41:57.760 --> 0:42:00.360
<v Speaker 1>family members obviously have so much bias involves the in

0:42:00.440 --> 0:42:02.399
<v Speaker 1>the you know, their opinions and all those things. So

0:42:03.040 --> 0:42:06.000
<v Speaker 1>I almost think it's like never a bad idea maybe

0:42:06.000 --> 0:42:08.239
<v Speaker 1>to bring in a family member that is always looking

0:42:08.239 --> 0:42:09.919
<v Speaker 1>out for the best of the person. But I think

0:42:10.000 --> 0:42:13.720
<v Speaker 1>a therapists purpose is so specific and like that third

0:42:14.239 --> 0:42:18.960
<v Speaker 1>unbiased party perspective is super key in my opinion. But um,

0:42:19.000 --> 0:42:20.959
<v Speaker 1>I mean, Mark, I don't disagree with what you're saying.

0:42:20.960 --> 0:42:24.200
<v Speaker 1>I just think that there's like a different different situations

0:42:24.200 --> 0:42:26.600
<v Speaker 1>for each thing you order. Is is is so busy that

0:42:26.640 --> 0:42:29.000
<v Speaker 1>all the operators were busy and Jared had to take

0:42:29.040 --> 0:42:31.560
<v Speaker 1>a call. I mean, just take the call. I'm very

0:42:31.640 --> 0:42:34.960
<v Speaker 1>excited for Mark to listen back to this voice memo

0:42:35.120 --> 0:42:38.040
<v Speaker 1>because he will see he will hear me take the

0:42:38.160 --> 0:42:41.600
<v Speaker 1>order of the b L t Ambrioch with mayonnaise, And

0:42:41.960 --> 0:42:44.319
<v Speaker 1>I gave him a nice detailed explanation of the chips

0:42:44.360 --> 0:42:47.560
<v Speaker 1>that we use on the side at the end like

0:42:47.600 --> 0:42:49.880
<v Speaker 1>a little Easter egg for everyone that sticks through the credits,

0:42:50.120 --> 0:42:52.680
<v Speaker 1>and we have a pickle if you eat it uh

0:42:52.960 --> 0:42:55.680
<v Speaker 1>in in the coffee shop in the in the restaurants,

0:42:57.280 --> 0:42:59.640
<v Speaker 1>I don't get to pick the order, not on the

0:42:59.719 --> 0:43:03.560
<v Speaker 1>to go order. No pickle because pickle to go it's

0:43:03.640 --> 0:43:06.680
<v Speaker 1>like what we wrap it up in a lotting foild.

0:43:07.239 --> 0:43:13.319
<v Speaker 1>I no, no pickles to go. It's inscentivizes. Yeah, like

0:43:13.680 --> 0:43:16.160
<v Speaker 1>Jimmy John's all to go. Pickles at Jimmy John's are

0:43:16.320 --> 0:43:21.000
<v Speaker 1>so good. All right, let's get to the next email. Alright, alright, alright, alright.

0:43:21.440 --> 0:43:23.640
<v Speaker 1>I like Dean's idea. I'll put the I'll put the

0:43:23.719 --> 0:43:25.279
<v Speaker 1>order at the end of the episode if you want

0:43:25.320 --> 0:43:31.040
<v Speaker 1>to listen through. Yeah, alright, next email. This is from anonymous.

0:43:31.040 --> 0:43:32.880
<v Speaker 1>I've been dating my boyfriend for a year now and

0:43:32.880 --> 0:43:35.040
<v Speaker 1>he's great. We met on a dating app and we're

0:43:35.080 --> 0:43:38.080
<v Speaker 1>doing long distance, only an eight hour drive away. Not

0:43:38.239 --> 0:43:44.880
<v Speaker 1>bad not bad are very different. What is what is bad?

0:43:44.920 --> 0:43:48.320
<v Speaker 1>If that's not what is bad? I have always wanted

0:43:48.320 --> 0:43:50.680
<v Speaker 1>to be with someone who prioritizes me, but my boyfriend

0:43:50.760 --> 0:43:53.480
<v Speaker 1>is starting to suffocate me. He never hangs out with

0:43:53.520 --> 0:43:56.480
<v Speaker 1>his friends anymore. He always wants to FaceTime every night,

0:43:56.520 --> 0:43:59.000
<v Speaker 1>talk all day, etcetera. It's getting to the point where

0:43:59.000 --> 0:44:01.279
<v Speaker 1>you started to lose his ends, and I'm starting to

0:44:01.320 --> 0:44:03.520
<v Speaker 1>resent him for taking up too much of my time.

0:44:03.920 --> 0:44:06.560
<v Speaker 1>I want him to prioritize me what it matters, But

0:44:06.640 --> 0:44:08.799
<v Speaker 1>I also want if they have our own lives. How

0:44:08.840 --> 0:44:10.920
<v Speaker 1>do I bring this up to him without hurting his feelings?

0:44:11.040 --> 0:44:17.840
<v Speaker 1>Have you ever felt like this, I'm gonna take a

0:44:17.880 --> 0:44:20.960
<v Speaker 1>back seat here, you guys go, well this email Anonymous.

0:44:21.040 --> 0:44:23.120
<v Speaker 1>I'm sure you're a very nice human being, and you

0:44:23.200 --> 0:44:25.560
<v Speaker 1>listen to help my suck a dating, so you obviously

0:44:25.600 --> 0:44:30.200
<v Speaker 1>have great taste. I'm I'm curious if you talk about

0:44:30.239 --> 0:44:33.399
<v Speaker 1>this with your boyfriend and then your boyfriend does take

0:44:33.880 --> 0:44:37.200
<v Speaker 1>a back seat and stops giving you so much attention,

0:44:37.560 --> 0:44:40.480
<v Speaker 1>if you're going to regret your decision, and then you're

0:44:40.480 --> 0:44:43.319
<v Speaker 1>gonna miss all the attention that you're were getting. So

0:44:43.480 --> 0:44:45.920
<v Speaker 1>what I would say is just be careful what you

0:44:46.000 --> 0:44:49.759
<v Speaker 1>ask for, because if you're asking for less attention, be

0:44:49.880 --> 0:44:54.239
<v Speaker 1>prepared to get less attention. That's all I would say. Okay,

0:44:54.360 --> 0:44:56.279
<v Speaker 1>so that really was very helpful, Kelsey, What do you think?

0:44:57.640 --> 0:45:01.000
<v Speaker 1>I agree? But at the same time, too, you have

0:45:01.160 --> 0:45:05.000
<v Speaker 1>to have your own life, like your relationship shouldn't be

0:45:05.640 --> 0:45:07.279
<v Speaker 1>just the tub, Like you have to have your own

0:45:07.320 --> 0:45:11.759
<v Speaker 1>things for yourself. Otherwise, like I understand you get suffocated

0:45:11.760 --> 0:45:13.719
<v Speaker 1>because I've been in a relationship like that, so I

0:45:13.800 --> 0:45:18.799
<v Speaker 1>understand where she's coming from. Um, but she just needs

0:45:18.800 --> 0:45:23.120
<v Speaker 1>to have a conversation with him. Yeah, I agree with that.

0:45:23.239 --> 0:45:25.239
<v Speaker 1>I mean even even right now, for instance, I'm in

0:45:25.280 --> 0:45:27.799
<v Speaker 1>Las Vegas by myself. Caitlin is in Los Angeles by

0:45:27.800 --> 0:45:31.239
<v Speaker 1>herself because I was like, listen, I we just spent

0:45:31.320 --> 0:45:33.480
<v Speaker 1>Christmas with my family. We were just in Columbia with

0:45:33.520 --> 0:45:35.600
<v Speaker 1>a bunch of our friends. I just need to go

0:45:35.800 --> 0:45:37.960
<v Speaker 1>and be alone. I just need to be alone by

0:45:37.960 --> 0:45:40.040
<v Speaker 1>myself for like a day and a half. And she

0:45:40.200 --> 0:45:42.680
<v Speaker 1>was like, great, see you later. I think just by

0:45:42.719 --> 0:45:45.160
<v Speaker 1>like telling them, like, just tell the other person, like,

0:45:45.400 --> 0:45:47.200
<v Speaker 1>I just need some space, just a little bit of time,

0:45:47.239 --> 0:45:49.720
<v Speaker 1>just like to decompress. That's how I recharged my batteries.

0:45:49.800 --> 0:45:52.319
<v Speaker 1>I've always been this way. Um. And if they like

0:45:52.400 --> 0:45:55.680
<v Speaker 1>don't respond to it, well, then maybe that's not necessarily

0:45:55.680 --> 0:45:57.960
<v Speaker 1>the right person for you, because in my opinion, that's

0:45:58.000 --> 0:46:01.160
<v Speaker 1>like one of the biggest biggest factors in any relationship

0:46:01.239 --> 0:46:03.560
<v Speaker 1>is like, is the person that you're dating going to

0:46:03.719 --> 0:46:05.279
<v Speaker 1>like give you the space that you need when you

0:46:05.320 --> 0:46:08.319
<v Speaker 1>ask for it? And if they say no, or if

0:46:08.320 --> 0:46:11.120
<v Speaker 1>they say yes and don't follow through with it, then like,

0:46:11.160 --> 0:46:12.719
<v Speaker 1>then that's going to be your life for the rest

0:46:12.719 --> 0:46:14.200
<v Speaker 1>of your life. If you stay with this person, so

0:46:14.640 --> 0:46:17.080
<v Speaker 1>be clear and like do it, and if they don't

0:46:17.080 --> 0:46:20.440
<v Speaker 1>honor what you're asking for, then either you know, press

0:46:20.480 --> 0:46:22.600
<v Speaker 1>them on a little harder, or you know, start to

0:46:22.640 --> 0:46:24.759
<v Speaker 1>find an exit strategy if you will. I guess it

0:46:24.840 --> 0:46:26.399
<v Speaker 1>might be a little harsh, but that's how I feel

0:46:26.400 --> 0:46:29.120
<v Speaker 1>about it. I'm like you, Deene, I need time to

0:46:29.200 --> 0:46:32.760
<v Speaker 1>myself to like I can be together for an extended

0:46:32.800 --> 0:46:34.920
<v Speaker 1>period of time, but then after that I need my

0:46:34.960 --> 0:46:39.480
<v Speaker 1>alone time. Or I just I mean, I don't understand

0:46:39.480 --> 0:46:41.520
<v Speaker 1>how people don't love being alone. Like being alone is

0:46:41.560 --> 0:46:43.960
<v Speaker 1>one of the best things in the world. I agree

0:46:44.880 --> 0:46:47.680
<v Speaker 1>for a short period of time, I totally agree. I

0:46:47.760 --> 0:46:50.920
<v Speaker 1>like my alone time. The only point I was making

0:46:51.160 --> 0:46:57.040
<v Speaker 1>is that I've just just you know, be prepared for

0:46:57.120 --> 0:46:59.600
<v Speaker 1>less attention. That's all because I feel like I've seen this.

0:46:59.640 --> 0:47:02.359
<v Speaker 1>I've seen this before where my friends are like they're

0:47:02.360 --> 0:47:06.400
<v Speaker 1>too suffocating. I need like, I need time, I need space.

0:47:06.640 --> 0:47:09.680
<v Speaker 1>They asked for space, they get space, and then they

0:47:09.680 --> 0:47:12.280
<v Speaker 1>feel like the other person is stopped has stopped caring

0:47:12.320 --> 0:47:14.719
<v Speaker 1>about them because they're like, well, now he's not doing

0:47:14.760 --> 0:47:16.399
<v Speaker 1>this or now he's not doing that, and it's like, well,

0:47:16.400 --> 0:47:18.600
<v Speaker 1>what do you ask for? Space? What do you want?

0:47:18.880 --> 0:47:21.520
<v Speaker 1>So I would just say, you know, try to find

0:47:21.560 --> 0:47:23.920
<v Speaker 1>that middle ground, as difficult as that is. What if

0:47:23.960 --> 0:47:27.319
<v Speaker 1>they asked specifically for the pickle. What if they really like,

0:47:28.000 --> 0:47:30.520
<v Speaker 1>they say, can I just please have a pickle because

0:47:30.520 --> 0:47:33.840
<v Speaker 1>they're delicious at at Audrey specifically? What would you do?

0:47:33.960 --> 0:47:35.560
<v Speaker 1>What if they really wanted to pickle chaired? What if

0:47:35.560 --> 0:47:39.719
<v Speaker 1>you want two pickles two pickles. They come up and

0:47:39.760 --> 0:47:41.920
<v Speaker 1>they beg for a pickle. I'll give him the pickle,

0:47:42.160 --> 0:47:43.920
<v Speaker 1>but you try to get the two pickles. Do you

0:47:43.960 --> 0:47:46.400
<v Speaker 1>know how much pickles are? They're not cheap pickles that

0:47:46.440 --> 0:47:49.759
<v Speaker 1>I buy. If I eat in the restaurant, I get

0:47:49.800 --> 0:47:51.880
<v Speaker 1>a free pickle. If I get a pickle to go,

0:47:51.920 --> 0:47:54.080
<v Speaker 1>do I have to pay for the pickle? No? But

0:47:54.120 --> 0:47:55.600
<v Speaker 1>if you ask for two pickles, you're paying for that

0:47:55.640 --> 0:48:00.279
<v Speaker 1>second pickle. It's fair listen listening to help I suck

0:48:00.320 --> 0:48:02.640
<v Speaker 1>your dating. If you really want to pickle from Audrey's

0:48:02.840 --> 0:48:06.840
<v Speaker 1>Cocktail Lounge, you have to specifically ask for it for

0:48:06.920 --> 0:48:14.839
<v Speaker 1>tack for it's a. It's a marketplace called Belmont. It's

0:48:14.840 --> 0:48:21.399
<v Speaker 1>a local marketplace. They're very good locally. Pickles, you know, yeah, no, no, no,

0:48:21.560 --> 0:48:23.760
<v Speaker 1>like uh, I don't even know what type of pickle

0:48:24.320 --> 0:48:26.960
<v Speaker 1>would that be called. It's like a cucumber, the gherkin?

0:48:27.680 --> 0:48:33.720
<v Speaker 1>Is that a gherkin? Pickle? Aren't cucumbers? Pickles and pickles cucumbers?

0:48:33.800 --> 0:48:38.840
<v Speaker 1>They are, but it's like a how they're made. I

0:48:38.840 --> 0:48:41.920
<v Speaker 1>don't know. Pickles and cucumbers. That's the name of this episode,

0:48:42.520 --> 0:48:45.280
<v Speaker 1>pickles and cucumbers. All right, Well, I think that's probably

0:48:45.320 --> 0:48:47.080
<v Speaker 1>gonna just about do it for this episode. What do

0:48:47.120 --> 0:48:53.520
<v Speaker 1>you guys think? Yeah, I gotta sell some pickles all there? Great,

0:48:53.719 --> 0:48:57.759
<v Speaker 1>Jared's got pickles, Kelsey's got maybe pickles and marks probably

0:48:59.400 --> 0:49:02.520
<v Speaker 1>a good. Thank you guys so much for joining us

0:49:02.560 --> 0:49:05.680
<v Speaker 1>for this week's episode of Help I Suck at Dating? Kelsey,

0:49:05.760 --> 0:49:07.359
<v Speaker 1>we are thank you so much for being our co

0:49:07.440 --> 0:49:11.399
<v Speaker 1>host with us this week. Um. We hope that next

0:49:11.440 --> 0:49:13.839
<v Speaker 1>time we talked to you we get a lot more

0:49:13.920 --> 0:49:16.040
<v Speaker 1>of an inside scoop on what's going on through dating life,

0:49:16.080 --> 0:49:18.319
<v Speaker 1>because hopefully there's a lot more to share. We'll see. Hey,

0:49:18.320 --> 0:49:19.880
<v Speaker 1>by the way, I just saw your birthday. You were

0:49:19.920 --> 0:49:24.520
<v Speaker 1>born fourteen days before I was, so yeah, we're team Mary's.

0:49:24.560 --> 0:49:28.560
<v Speaker 1>That's awesome. That's right, that's right. Um big thank you

0:49:28.560 --> 0:49:31.040
<v Speaker 1>to Brett Robinson for joining us on this podcast this week.

0:49:31.080 --> 0:49:33.880
<v Speaker 1>Don't forget to check out his TikTok's Brett W. Robinson

0:49:34.280 --> 0:49:37.160
<v Speaker 1>on TikTok, Instagram, Twitter, all that kind of stuff. Tyler.

0:49:37.320 --> 0:49:39.800
<v Speaker 1>Hopefully you figure it out with your girlfriend. It sounds

0:49:39.800 --> 0:49:41.600
<v Speaker 1>like she's in a tough spot, but it sounds like

0:49:41.640 --> 0:49:43.120
<v Speaker 1>you're a good guy. So hopefully guys be able to

0:49:43.120 --> 0:49:46.360
<v Speaker 1>figure it out together. Um Mark, thanks for reading our emails,

0:49:47.280 --> 0:49:51.440
<v Speaker 1>and uh, I guess there's nothing left to say, so

0:49:51.760 --> 0:49:55.000
<v Speaker 1>maybe next week we'll stuck just a little bit less.

0:49:55.080 --> 0:49:58.200
<v Speaker 1>Follow help by suck at Dating on I Heart Radio

0:49:58.360 --> 0:50:03.359
<v Speaker 1>or wherever you listen to podcast. All right, what can

0:50:03.400 --> 0:50:07.160
<v Speaker 1>I get for you? Yeah? Of course it usually comes

0:50:07.160 --> 0:50:09.520
<v Speaker 1>on brioche bread. Um, do you want that? We could

0:50:09.520 --> 0:50:15.040
<v Speaker 1>also do chibbatta, We could do wheat bread wrap. Did

0:50:15.040 --> 0:50:17.160
<v Speaker 1>you want to add anything to it? Obviously just comes

0:50:17.160 --> 0:50:18.680
<v Speaker 1>with the biggest lessons man. And I don't know if

0:50:18.680 --> 0:50:22.319
<v Speaker 1>you want to cheese or mayonnaise or anything we do

0:50:22.400 --> 0:50:25.520
<v Speaker 1>as sided chips. Sure, it's just to be able t

0:50:25.640 --> 0:50:29.040
<v Speaker 1>embrios with mayonnaise and a bagg of chips on the side. Yeah,

0:50:29.080 --> 0:50:32.600
<v Speaker 1>it'll be ready in five to ten minutes. Thanks man.