Speaker 1: Kaboom. If you thought four hours a day, minutes a
Speaker 1: week was enough, I think again. He's the last remnants
Speaker 1: of the old republic, a sole fashion of fairness. He
Speaker 1: treats crackheads in the ghetto cutter the same as the
Speaker 1: rich pill poppers in the penthouse, to clearinghouse of hot takes,
Speaker 1: break free for something special. The Fifth Hour with Ben
Speaker 1: Maller starts right now in the air everywhere and another
Speaker 1: pipe and a hot edition of the Fifth Hour with
Speaker 1: Ben Maller and Danny G Radio back in the podcast
Speaker 1: dojo for round number two. Danny G of the weekend
Speaker 1: Extravaganza every single day, every single day, I follow the
Speaker 1: coat of the West. You must take pride in your
Speaker 1: work in all's finish what you start, among other things.
Speaker 1: And so we're doing that right now, even though some
Speaker 1: of us might be bumbling and stumbling and all that stuff.
Speaker 1: But no, no, we're good to go today. Yes, yeah,
Speaker 1: let's go. We're like Ox. We're carrying a heavy load. Ben.
Speaker 1: My lower back has been barking at me the past
Speaker 1: couple of days. Yeah, we're doing the dirty work, is
Speaker 1: what we're doing. We're doing the donkey work. I want
Speaker 1: a camel. Just a couple of donkeys. That's it. Just
Speaker 1: a couple of donkeys, all right. So on this edition
Speaker 1: the fifth Hour, please continue to give us five stars.
Speaker 1: We will check in later with the backscratcher segment. We've
Speaker 1: got Goofy, the Future Leaders, malfeasance, and if we have time,
Speaker 1: we'll have some scientifical nonsense as well. But we begin
Speaker 1: with this. It's been a rather hectic week in these
Speaker 1: parts The Life of Mallard and Danny g Podcast. That's
Speaker 1: how We roll here. We mentioned this last week on
Speaker 1: the podcast, The Mallard Mansion invasion underway. Cousins visiting from
Speaker 1: near and far. And these are people that I grew
Speaker 1: up with, and then they moved away. I wasn't that
Speaker 1: old they had moved away, but I was a little kid.
Speaker 1: I hung out with him like all the time. I
Speaker 1: used to live right down the street from the the
Speaker 1: house that I grew up in, and and we were
Speaker 1: like little snot nose punk kids and stuff, and and
Speaker 1: so they're really more like brothers and sisters rather than
Speaker 1: than cousins. They astonded on California from New York, Denver, Phoenix.
Speaker 1: They've scattered all over the country, for like a quasi
Speaker 1: family reunion, which is mostly about them. It really wasn't
Speaker 1: about about me, and it was great to see everyone.
Speaker 1: I should check that. It was great to see most
Speaker 1: of my my cousins. I had at a very awkward
Speaker 1: a story which I'm I'm debating whether or not to
Speaker 1: get into on the on the podcast. It's probably against
Speaker 1: my best judgment to do it, so I'll probably do
Speaker 1: it anything, but I'll get to that in a sect.
Speaker 1: So so anyway, all these cousins came in and I
Speaker 1: was very excited to everybody. And last Friday was the
Speaker 1: first day everyone had assembled. So we went whale watching,
Speaker 1: which is a California thing that you can't go whale
Speaker 1: watching in Phoenix or in Colorado, so we, you know,
Speaker 1: went out when California do what California do. So we
Speaker 1: went will watching, which is actually false advertising. You rarely
Speaker 1: see whales, you always see dolphins, so why don't they
Speaker 1: just call it dolphin watching? Danny, I don't get it seriously.
Speaker 1: So we actually saw hundreds of dolphins off the Newport
Speaker 1: code was beautiful. Not a single whale in that big
Speaker 1: blue ocean. I didn't see any whales, but that was
Speaker 1: like Friday afternoon. My cousins from Colorado there, my uh
Speaker 1: my one cousin, his wife, and then there air kids.
Speaker 1: They actually got stuck overseas during COVID. They were on
Speaker 1: vacation and the airport shut down and they were stuck.
Speaker 1: I think it was in Ireland for like six months.
Speaker 1: They were. They had they had an airbnb and they
Speaker 1: just had to stay there because they couldn't leave the country.
Speaker 1: It was unlocked up. Yeah. But but anyway, so I
Speaker 1: saw him hung out with that was great lot of fun.
Speaker 1: And my sister in law was also long and she
Speaker 1: brought her kids, and so I got uncle Benny got
Speaker 1: suckered into. They had a gift shop on the boat,
Speaker 1: so I had to I had to buy like a
Speaker 1: three dollar plastic whale thing. That is the only whale
Speaker 1: we saw. So I feel like, as an uncle, you
Speaker 1: have to spoil the kids, Like that's the job of
Speaker 1: an uncle to spoil the kids with all kinds of
Speaker 1: nonsense and all that. So we did that and then
Speaker 1: Friday night, As the Life of Mallard continues, Danny, we
Speaker 1: had a big welcome to, you know, back to California
Speaker 1: and a big kind of party. My wife had planned
Speaker 1: at the Mallard mansion and so it was great at
Speaker 1: a good turn out. Some of her family was there,
Speaker 1: My cousins were there, their kids. So it was a
Speaker 1: madhouse all right. The kids were running around and the
Speaker 1: house almost burned down. One of the kids, this three
Speaker 1: year old kid, Hudson. This kid is the Tasmanian devil,
Speaker 1: this kid, and he went into the the kitchen. We
Speaker 1: were out in the back talking. All the adults were
Speaker 1: in the back and some of the kids. They had
Speaker 1: like a gang of kids that took over the house.
Speaker 1: And this little three year old kid, like I was
Speaker 1: turning on the stove and boom, goes to dynamite. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's experimenting with with fire and uh and and we
Speaker 1: had to we had to tell him not to do that.
Speaker 1: That's probably not a good idea because uh, you know, burn,
Speaker 1: baby burn and all that. So we got that under
Speaker 1: control and um now was when we stayed there pretty late.
Speaker 1: Had a little fire pit thing going on. So that
Speaker 1: was cool. And then on Saturday we decided we have
Speaker 1: a lot of time. They were they were Disneyland, and
Speaker 1: I considered going to Disneyland, Danny g and then I
Speaker 1: saw how much it costs to go to Disneyland, and
Speaker 1: I said, well, maybe I'll go another time. You didn't
Speaker 1: want to set money on fire, exactly exactly, and so
Speaker 1: I said, go on, I have a good time with
Speaker 1: your kids. Kids will go wildy, they love Disney and
Speaker 1: all I said, well, well, we're gonna go to the beach, right,
Speaker 1: because what could go wrong going to the beach. You
Speaker 1: go to Disney and we'll go to beach. We'll meet
Speaker 1: you for dinner. So we went over to the beach
Speaker 1: and drove around for half an hour trying to find
Speaker 1: a parking place, and we just decided finally that that
Speaker 1: we gave up. That was it, and we we never
Speaker 1: actually did go to the beach because it was so
Speaker 1: packed that there were more people trying to find parking
Speaker 1: then there were actually anywhere close to parking spaces. It
Speaker 1: was a complete nightmare. And well, I wish I could
Speaker 1: stop it, but I did stop. Actually I went back
Speaker 1: and I left so wrong, No, I did. I left
Speaker 1: and then I went back to the to that. So anyway,
Speaker 1: we met my cousins at Downtown Disney, but uh my,
Speaker 1: there was confusion with this yere so only my Colorado
Speaker 1: cousins went to hang out with us. We went to
Speaker 1: Downtown Disney where it's right near Disneyland. There. You you've
Speaker 1: been to Downtown Disney right then you have a great
Speaker 1: place to hang out. Did you go to the Lego Store?
Speaker 1: I did. Yeah. You walk right past the Lego Star
Speaker 1: when you park, and you you walk around there and
Speaker 1: they've got these giant Lego things in. There's a bunch
Speaker 1: of restaurants and whatnot. It's pretty cool. It's got the
Speaker 1: Disney vibe, but you don't have to spend any more
Speaker 1: than like ten bucks on parking in order to enjoy that,
Speaker 1: like the vibe of it and stuff like that. And
Speaker 1: you're so close, it's like being against the pearly gates,
Speaker 1: but you're not in heaven. And uh, because they they
Speaker 1: have that mono rail station. You take the mono rail
Speaker 1: to Disneyland and then you can keep walking and there's
Speaker 1: Disneyland in California in advention and all that. So we're
Speaker 1: gonna meet them for dinner. The restaurant we wanted to
Speaker 1: eat that had a ninety minute wait, oh no, ninety
Speaker 1: minute wait to eat some pasta, and that seemed a
Speaker 1: little outrageous. So we went to another place that didn't
Speaker 1: have a long wait, and but again only my cousins
Speaker 1: from from Colorado, UH. The ones from Arizona and UH
Speaker 1: in New York did not did not make it, and UM,
Speaker 1: so then we hung out with them, had a good
Speaker 1: time whatever, it went back UH then the fast forward day.
Speaker 1: So I'll tell the part of story I probably should
Speaker 1: not tell. But I don't think any of these people
Speaker 1: listen to podcast. So I'm gonna ask you a question.
Speaker 1: Did I make a mistake? Was the problem on me?
Speaker 1: Or is the problem on my my cousins? So my
Speaker 1: cousins from New York, I had not seen her in
Speaker 1: many years, and so a very busy schedule with the
Speaker 1: radio show. The only times I was available we're Friday, Saturday,
Speaker 1: and then on Thursday. So those three days were the
Speaker 1: time I was available. So Friday she said they were
Speaker 1: too tired from from traveling to UH to make the
Speaker 1: the shin dig. Saturday, we were at Downtown disney Is
Speaker 1: supposed to meet them, and they said they could not
Speaker 1: be inconvenience to come out of the park and hang
Speaker 1: out with it because they were having too much of
Speaker 1: too much of a good time. And then on the Thursday,
Speaker 1: my cousin. She said that she would meet with us,
Speaker 1: but she wanted us to go to her hotel even
Speaker 1: though she has a rental car. Who me, Yeah, So
Speaker 1: I I processed all this, and I said, you know,
Speaker 1: these people don't really want to hang out with us.
Speaker 1: So I said, we're good as I believe. I said,
Speaker 1: what are we trying to meet the pope here? Uh?
Speaker 1: Is what I said? And so am I the bad
Speaker 1: guy on that? Danny g Or? Are are they the
Speaker 1: bad people on that? Like? I mean, if people really
Speaker 1: want to hang out with you, family or not, then
Speaker 1: they make an effort to hang out with you. That's
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. Okay, see, good you're because that's my point.
Speaker 1: Like I wasn't on vacation. This was their vacation. I
Speaker 1: get it. You're on vacation. You want to do your
Speaker 1: thing and all that stuff, and that's fine. Yeah, I know.
Speaker 1: But at the same time, I only have a couple
Speaker 1: of like a day and a half off from from
Speaker 1: this radio stuff where I'm not NonStop doing it, and
Speaker 1: so I made sure to make myself available on both
Speaker 1: those days, and then I added a bonus day. So
Speaker 1: I'm like, okay, I'm like I feel like I'm doing
Speaker 1: everything I can to make this as convenient as possible.
Speaker 1: And I just got the vibe from my am. So
Speaker 1: I didn't even see them, you know, there, I here
Speaker 1: for a week from from New York, and they were
Speaker 1: so so uh selfish with you know, I don't know
Speaker 1: if that's the right word, but they were so one
Speaker 1: of their own thing. They didn't didn't make any time
Speaker 1: to to hang out, which is which is disappointing. So
Speaker 1: they didn't even at your Mallard mansion. Now, no, no,
Speaker 1: they said they were so so tired. I guess they Yeah,
Speaker 1: that was the Friday thing. But downtown Disney, we were
Speaker 1: like right there. It takes like, you know, ten minutes
Speaker 1: to take the monorail to get out, eat some food,
Speaker 1: and go back. It was just a goofy set of
Speaker 1: set of events. But I never really experienced anything like
Speaker 1: this in my life where a relative had traveled to
Speaker 1: literally like right down the street. I met all the
Speaker 1: other all the other cousins. In fact, some of them stayed.
Speaker 1: My cousins from Arizona stayed at the house, so I
Speaker 1: met everybody. It was great to see them, and there
Speaker 1: my my buddy and my cousin, Danny's kid was here
Speaker 1: and hanging out, little kid, and so it was. It
Speaker 1: was wonderful, but it was very odd. Yeah, what does
Speaker 1: this cousin have against you? I don't know what I did.
Speaker 1: I yeah, I mean I thought it was like very
Speaker 1: common in We aviided into a party. We we went
Speaker 1: right to where they were and just apparently didn't want
Speaker 1: to see us. I guess I must have done something.
Speaker 1: I don't know. I'm not sure what I did. I
Speaker 1: it's uh, yeah, did you get a text on their
Speaker 1: way out of town saying okay, sorry we didn't get
Speaker 1: to meet up. No, No, that's the weird thing, Like
Speaker 1: there were no texts. They were like middle people communicating
Speaker 1: like other cousins were communicating between us, Like they never
Speaker 1: reached out at at all. So you definitely offended somebody. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I don't really know what I did. I haven't seen
Speaker 1: them in years, so I'm I'm not sure. But so
Speaker 1: that was that was weird. That was the first time
Speaker 1: I can recall someone traveling thousands of miles being right
Speaker 1: down the street meeting with all of their brothers and
Speaker 1: sisters but not them. Ben. I have had family come
Speaker 1: down from northern California, go to Disneyland, and I find
Speaker 1: out about it a couple of weeks later. Yeah, well, yeah,
Speaker 1: you're not the only one where people are kind of
Speaker 1: inconvenience because when they're paying for Disneyland, they're all in.
Speaker 1: They want Disneyland to get their money's worth. Yeah. No,
Speaker 1: it's an obscene amount of money to go to Disneyland.
Speaker 1: I don't know how the people that run disney sleep
Speaker 1: at night, but good for them. Knock yourself out and
Speaker 1: all that. You might want to lower the prices a
Speaker 1: bit here, uh, and take the advice of our former president.
Speaker 1: Don't be rude. Just don't be rude. So moving on
Speaker 1: from that, it's all about the future. See we're old
Speaker 1: news mean you Danny g wor old news now, But
Speaker 1: it's all about the next generation. It's all about the
Speaker 1: future leaders, the people that will take over when we
Speaker 1: passed the baton, right, the ones that are right now
Speaker 1: little kids, but eventually they'll be angry, middle aged people
Speaker 1: and they'll be leaders of the world. Yeah, Ben, it's
Speaker 1: been a couple of weeks since I checked in from
Speaker 1: Science Room three at Summer School. Lots of cool projects.
Speaker 1: The kids have been great. The adults, but uh yeah,
Speaker 1: the kids make it worth going in. And then at
Speaker 1: the same time, I've been picking up all these fill
Speaker 1: in shifts at the network, so running NonStop. A couple
Speaker 1: of days ago, I'm in the classroom and I have
Speaker 1: one teacher's aid in there who helps out with the kids,
Speaker 1: and she's great. She goes to San Diego State. She's
Speaker 1: been in there when the year olds are in the class.
Speaker 1: I've had second through fifth most of the time. So
Speaker 1: they're like, yeah, we're gonna have the teens in your
Speaker 1: class for class three, and I'm like, all right, that's cool.
Speaker 1: So I had to make up some lesson plans that
Speaker 1: suited the older kids. Was going great. Making the kids laugh.
Speaker 1: They're getting more jokes than the little ones, because obviously
Speaker 1: second through fifth grade some of the jokes go right
Speaker 1: over their head. Teenagers are laughing, they're having fun in
Speaker 1: the class. And then towards the end of class Ben,
Speaker 1: when we're cleaning up the science project, she takes over
Speaker 1: and she does trivia and she's like, all right, it's
Speaker 1: time for Cassie Trivia. And the kids are like, yeah,
Speaker 1: let's do trivia, and she asked the kids raise your hand,
Speaker 1: don't part out the answer. Her first trivia question, what
Speaker 1: was the first state in America? Oh? Okay, and did
Speaker 1: the kids get it right? Did they? And shoot up?
Speaker 1: First kid answers Detroit. Oh boy, oh boy, all right,
Speaker 1: and so we're off to a good start. Then she
Speaker 1: asked which animal has the hardest skull? And this girl
Speaker 1: shoots her hand up and she answers, my brother. At
Speaker 1: least that one was a joke. Okay. Then she asked,
Speaker 1: and I made notes here afterwards because I was just
Speaker 1: sitting in the back at my desk laughing. She asked
Speaker 1: what causes most of the power outages each year? And
Speaker 1: a girl in the back raise your hand and answered
Speaker 1: mountain lions. Oh, well, that is a big problem. Mountain lions.
Speaker 1: Well they do is they eat the power lions and
Speaker 1: somehow they don't die. It doesn't make any sense. You'd
Speaker 1: think they die from eating the puck, but no, it's
Speaker 1: just a snack. And then they knocked a power out
Speaker 1: for the rest of us dummies. It's crazy. I hate
Speaker 1: to report this, but the kid who answered Detroit and
Speaker 1: the kid who answered mountain lions, they were both dead
Speaker 1: serious and thought they had the right answer. Well in
Speaker 1: defense of the kid that said Detroit. One of my
Speaker 1: favorite stories about an old NBA player Benoitt Benjamin Bennoit
Speaker 1: Benjamin when he was playing in the NBA. He had
Speaker 1: left the NBA. This is the old NBA player from
Speaker 1: the eighties and the early in the nineties. I think
Speaker 1: he played till two thou anyway, he had gone to
Speaker 1: Europe to play. And uh, Lee Klein, who you know?
Speaker 1: Lee knew Benoit and we we were all talking. Actually
Speaker 1: Lee was talking to Benoit, and but Lee asked him,
Speaker 1: he said, Hey, what countries did you play it? He? Uh,
Speaker 1: he named Paris, uh is what he named, and he
Speaker 1: named two other cities in Europe that he Again the
Speaker 1: question was what country did you play in? And he
Speaker 1: named named cities. And then the other part of that,
Speaker 1: which was greatly actually brought me over for this. But
Speaker 1: Nooy asked us if we knew any teams that needed
Speaker 1: a center, And I thought that was an interesting thing.
Speaker 1: I I don't believe that happens anymore. Do you think
Speaker 1: that modern NBA players will ask a couple of random
Speaker 1: radio people, hey, do you know anybody who might want
Speaker 1: to hire a basketball player a center? And the and
Speaker 1: and all that. Uh, but it's it is h as
Speaker 1: far as the kids think, Like, how many kids know
Speaker 1: Delaware was the first date? Right, the first day known
Speaker 1: as the first date and all that, and they don't
Speaker 1: they still learn that stuff and that they must not. Right,
Speaker 1: that's like kind of random trivia stuff. When you do trivia,
Speaker 1: you become trivial. That's a Tom loud Y. There is
Speaker 1: this thing called US history and it is taught in
Speaker 1: most schools. Um, apparently these kids need a brush up
Speaker 1: on that class. Yeah, those two answers scared me. Those
Speaker 1: are our future leaders of America. Yes, and they will
Speaker 1: be congress people, you name it, local politicians and we'll
Speaker 1: all have a ringside seat as we get over. And
Speaker 1: by the way, the answer was squirrel for the animal
Speaker 1: that causes most of the power outages. Yeah, those squirrels
Speaker 1: are trouble man. At the Mallard Mansion, the old Mallard mansion.
Speaker 1: I am convinced we had squirrels in the addict of
Speaker 1: the house running around. Either that or there was a
Speaker 1: poltergeist malfeasans over here. So I had big plans, big plans,
Speaker 1: uh to tweak the home studio which I'm broadcasting from
Speaker 1: right now over the last week, and the way this came,
Speaker 1: I mean Mike cartoon bubble above my head, a big
Speaker 1: cartoon bubble, and I was like, you know, I should
Speaker 1: upgrade this thing. I've done this for a couple of
Speaker 1: years from the home studio, and so the way this works,
Speaker 1: imagine if you will. I have on the left side
Speaker 1: a terrestrial radio setup and that's the equipment that hooks
Speaker 1: me up to Fox Sports Radio the mothers, and on
Speaker 1: that side I built that for w E I years ago,
Speaker 1: and so I have a lot of thing of the
Speaker 1: jigs and what your McCall it's and all kinds of
Speaker 1: things on the left side that makes me sound all
Speaker 1: neat and pretty and all that. So on the right side,
Speaker 1: I don't want to say it's bare bones, but in comparison,
Speaker 1: it's the podcast side. And so I was like, you know,
Speaker 1: I want to upgrade this loople. So I said, I'm
Speaker 1: gonna get a few toys and I'm gonna play around
Speaker 1: with this. And I figured you can never go wrong
Speaker 1: with more jets and gizmos. Danny right went in doubt,
Speaker 1: throw some more gadgets and gizmos out. Why not? These
Speaker 1: things aren't that expensive. There's little things to make you
Speaker 1: sound better and all that. So I I'm always trying
Speaker 1: to find things that can improve the quality of any
Speaker 1: of this nonsense that we do. So I decided to
Speaker 1: get a new mic filter and a mic arm, a
Speaker 1: convenient mic arm for the podcast. I have one for
Speaker 1: the other side. Let's see, these are relatively minor things
Speaker 1: that in my head the cartoon bubble would help the
Speaker 1: efficiency the quality of the product, and they were cost
Speaker 1: effective because these things didn't cost that much. So the
Speaker 1: microphone arm, the mic arm was just a convenience move,
Speaker 1: and I was just tired of holding the microphone. So
Speaker 1: the first world problem. So I decided to spend a
Speaker 1: few bucks. I got a mic arm to hold the microphone.
Speaker 1: I got a filter that I had read about. It
Speaker 1: was pretty good, smooth out the quality of the broadcast
Speaker 1: bestly plans of mice men and guess back, no popping
Speaker 1: peas exactly. So these do hickeys arrive and I had
Speaker 1: a lot going on as family in town, so I
Speaker 1: was unable to open them right away. So I finally
Speaker 1: get around to opening these these things, and then all
Speaker 1: boxed up and all that, So I get the scissors
Speaker 1: out under the box taking things apart. So I put
Speaker 1: the mic arm up, and I think you can tell
Speaker 1: Danny because you can see me. But the mic arm
Speaker 1: literally and figuratively was such a turd. As I was
Speaker 1: putting it up, it fell apart in my hands. As
Speaker 1: I was setting the thing up. Was it made out
Speaker 1: of legos? I mean it looked like it was solid,
Speaker 1: but it wasn't solid. I guess somehow they screw maybe
Speaker 1: I screwed it up, but it was not working like
Speaker 1: the thing. I twisted the thing in the middle and
Speaker 1: the whole thing came apart, and there were what I
Speaker 1: was crazy, something like, oh, I that's that's gonna be returned.
Speaker 1: So then I'm like, let me put the mic filter
Speaker 1: and you know, I'll hook it up with my mixer. Well, okay,
Speaker 1: so I hook it up. I went out and bought
Speaker 1: some cables and all that, and it turns out that
Speaker 1: the thing I got is not compatible with the mixer
Speaker 1: that I have because there's a voltage issue. I never
Speaker 1: factored that in. I didn't think of that as a
Speaker 1: variable that I need to worry about, but it was.
Speaker 1: So it turned out to be a total case of
Speaker 1: mouth feasance. So then to make matters worse, as I mentioned,
Speaker 1: I also had gone out and I had purchased some
Speaker 1: new cables to put all this stuff together. So now
Speaker 1: I gotta return the cables. So now I gotta I
Speaker 1: gotta go back, and I gotta return everything. And uh man,
Speaker 1: oh man, oh man. I was so so pisty again
Speaker 1: the best laid plans of mice men and podcasters. So
Speaker 1: I still plan on upgrading. I'm gonna buy another mic arm, Danny,
Speaker 1: so I'll see if that. I'll spend a little bit
Speaker 1: more and see if you get more bang for your
Speaker 1: bucket all that. But I am disappointed because it was
Speaker 1: supposed to be all set up for this podcast, and
Speaker 1: it was a Murphy's law situation. Everything that could go
Speaker 1: wrong did go wrong. I thought there was a hidden
Speaker 1: camera somewhere if you could have seen the look on
Speaker 1: my face, Danny, when I was like, Oh, come on,
Speaker 1: I've been radio long time. I can set up a
Speaker 1: mic arm. What's the big deal you you put this
Speaker 1: thing connected? Big deal, No big deal, no problem at all.
Speaker 1: And as I'm putting it up, I'm struggling. I start
Speaker 1: twisting some things and then the thing just comes. It's
Speaker 1: like putty in my hands, brutal. I think we've all
Speaker 1: been there with Amazon where we try to save a
Speaker 1: few bucks and we get the one that's twenty seven
Speaker 1: instead of and then it's a piece of rapping. It
Speaker 1: waste your time and you have to return it and
Speaker 1: you're like, damn it, I should have just got the one,
Speaker 1: And that's what you wind up doing in the end,
Speaker 1: And when you're over three the way you were, I've
Speaker 1: had that happen as well. Then all of a sudden,
Speaker 1: you have three Amazon packages in your car that you're like, oh,
Speaker 1: I gotta return that. I'm gonna do it tomorrow, and
Speaker 1: you're lugging this crap around. The Last time I had
Speaker 1: three returns for Amazon, it took me two weeks to
Speaker 1: get that stuff to the ups store. Well, yeah, that's
Speaker 1: the concern, right, You're like, well, am I gonna forget
Speaker 1: about this? And we do have some listeners. We got
Speaker 1: one of our big fans in Arkansas is I guarantee
Speaker 1: he's the guy sent me the razorback and he's going
Speaker 1: to get this item, one of these items. He runs
Speaker 1: a clearance warehouse where they sell all of the return
Speaker 1: items from Walmart. So someone's gonna get really lucky. They're
Speaker 1: gonna get a broken mic arm that I had in
Speaker 1: the studio here. The other thing will work fine if
Speaker 1: you have the right equipment. I had the wrong equipment.
Speaker 1: I thought I had the right equipment. And so all
Speaker 1: of this stuff will end at a Amazon return store
Speaker 1: for pennies on the dollar. Amazon not allowed to resell
Speaker 1: products that they have sent out. Think how much more?
Speaker 1: I don't understand that, right I? I I think if
Speaker 1: somebody returns, if it has it's not broken, and just
Speaker 1: we'll sell it again. You can sell it at a discount.
Speaker 1: But they just get rid of all that stuff and
Speaker 1: they sell it by the truckload two people who charge
Speaker 1: like five bucks per item or ten bucks per item
Speaker 1: and all that. Yeah, I guess I got some money. Here,
Speaker 1: we have the back scratcher. Are you ready for the backscratch?
Speaker 1: Let's go? All right? This is our weekly tip of
Speaker 1: the on air light to the most loyal minions. Thanks
Speaker 1: a ton, and we do this once a weekend on Saturdays.
Speaker 1: Are actual listeners of the podcast, the Fifth Hour podcast
Speaker 1: on the Apple podcast page. The thing that management checks out.
Speaker 1: So we will go to the Apple podcast page and
Speaker 1: this week number one number only one, but that's fine.
Speaker 1: One a week we'll take that. We'd like to Two
Speaker 1: would be good, Three would blow the doors off. We
Speaker 1: got three that would be amazed. The review five stars
Speaker 1: headline fifth hour is number one, says great content every weekend.
Speaker 1: What's the story on Friday's song? Going into the last segment,
Speaker 1: so he's asking me about the radios funky music, Sleepy Jane,
Speaker 1: weekends made for fun. That's from George in Champa Bay, Florida.
Speaker 1: So all he's talking about the freestyle classic Lookout Weekend. Yes,
Speaker 1: that's a song that you found, Danny, that people love.
Speaker 1: It's one of those songs that not a lot of
Speaker 1: people know about. When they hear it, they go bajeebras,
Speaker 1: They're like, oh, that's cool, and it feels like the
Speaker 1: weekend is starting every time you hear that song. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and it's an old song. How old is the song? Well,
Speaker 1: how many years are we going back? I believe it's
Speaker 1: from the late eighties. Okay, so it's a it's over
Speaker 1: thirty years old. Yeah, over thirty years old and did
Speaker 1: not get a lot of playback when it came out.
Speaker 1: I would think it's I didn't hear it. I don't
Speaker 1: remember hearing it back in the eighties, So I mean
Speaker 1: if you were like a one oh six km e
Speaker 1: L listener or a old school Power one oh six
Speaker 1: listener in the late eighties, you might have heard it. Okay,
Speaker 1: Uh what was his name doing morning drive? He was
Speaker 1: on the TV show chairs. Oh Thomas? Umh Jay Thomas Thomas. Yes,
Speaker 1: Jay Thomas, radio guy, Jay Thomas. I'm J Thomas in
Speaker 1: the boarding was back in the it was actually mid
Speaker 1: eighties for that song lookout Weekend And yeah, you would
Speaker 1: have heard Jay Thomas in the morning on Power one
Speaker 1: of six L A is that guy still around? Jay Thomas?
Speaker 1: That's he unfortunately passed away? Did he did? He did?
Speaker 1: What did he pass away up? I want to say cancer? Yeah,
Speaker 1: all right. He was a good guy. I met him
Speaker 1: back in the day at a radio convention. Oh yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1: He made an appearance at a radio convention back in
Speaker 1: the day and was one of the keynote speakers. Um yeah,
Speaker 1: he I'm looking him up right now. He passed away.
Speaker 1: In seen. He was an American actor, comedian in radio personnel.
Speaker 1: He was heard on New York airways from seventy six
Speaker 1: to seventy nine on X and later on rhythmic HR
Speaker 1: station k t U and in l A beginning in
Speaker 1: nineteen six on our one oh six, where he hosted
Speaker 1: the top rated morning show until yeah. And he's the
Speaker 1: definition of a real broadcaster, like a radio guy and
Speaker 1: hey day a radio and he had the big pipes
Speaker 1: and the whole thing and the goofy radio bits and
Speaker 1: all that. He was a nice guy. All right. Well,
Speaker 1: I didn't realize he passed away. As if the last
Speaker 1: five years or so have all it's been a haze.
Speaker 1: It has been, But to be fair, I do not
Speaker 1: usually read the departure section on the internet. We used
Speaker 1: to tease this guy. Uh. He was the morning host
Speaker 1: on our AM station in Ventura. They played like Frank
Speaker 1: Sinatra music, Uh huh. And we would see him reading
Speaker 1: the obituaries every day in the paper and we're like, less,
Speaker 1: what are you doing? And he and he would look
Speaker 1: at us with a straight face and he'd say, I'm
Speaker 1: seeing how many listeners I lost yesterday. That's good. I
Speaker 1: like it. It's a good line. I have to steal
Speaker 1: that one. Let's said solid material. Well, I don't need
Speaker 1: to read the o bits because cowboy John Brad does.
Speaker 1: He's he's always the guy that tells us when somebody
Speaker 1: died the day they died, blah blah blah blah blah
Speaker 1: blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah. Speaking
Speaker 1: of Cowboy, he said this week he's going to enter
Speaker 1: the talent show The Mallard Paluza. Oh I heard about this.
Speaker 1: Mallard Paluza is coming up this week. It is Wednesday,
Speaker 1: in the Thursday, the day after the All Star Game,
Speaker 1: the most important night of the summer, not the Major
Speaker 1: League Baseball All Star Game, The Mallard Pellos A talent show.
Speaker 1: A lot of controversy with Jay Scoop announcing he's retiring
Speaker 1: from the Talent Show. People blown away by that did
Speaker 1: not see it shocked as shocking is really more shocking
Speaker 1: than Tom Brady because Tom Brady retired. You figured he's
Speaker 1: at the appropriate age and Jay Scoop is not doing
Speaker 1: a dance with death or anything like that. He's still
Speaker 1: in his prime. And but he just decided to shut
Speaker 1: her down. And he said he wanted other people to
Speaker 1: have an opportunity. But I am hearing rumors that he
Speaker 1: may change his mind. I don't know if that's true
Speaker 1: or not, but there are people saying things that he
Speaker 1: might walk back that retirement at the last minute, but
Speaker 1: I do not know. I do not know. So we
Speaker 1: have Ohio Al, the guy that makes the jingle for
Speaker 1: this Fifth Hour mailbag on Sunday. Kathy and Madison has
Speaker 1: signed up Rachel Amana below. A lot of the big
Speaker 1: music acts of the past, other than Ohio Out, have
Speaker 1: yet to sign up. Mr PC in Michigan says he's out,
Speaker 1: mentioned Jay Scoop is out. I've not heard from raz Quit,
Speaker 1: the band now called ras Acoustic on Twitter, so we'll
Speaker 1: see him. We always get last minute people. I have
Speaker 1: not heard from the Boston Burper, whether the Boston Purple
Speaker 1: will be back. I don't know if the Pigs Squealer
Speaker 1: from Kansas will be in this year. I don't know,
Speaker 1: but we'll find out. So it should be an interesting,
Speaker 1: interesting week, Danny with the talent show the main event
Speaker 1: right near the middle of the week. Now, Kathy usually
Speaker 1: serenades you, so for the talent shows are just more
Speaker 1: of the same. Yeah, Well, Cathy's the Hey Mona woman.
Speaker 1: She gave us the great Hey Mona and all that.
Speaker 1: So she's she did send a song in where she lives.
Speaker 1: She's not able to perform live, but she said she
Speaker 1: did do a song for us and she wanted everyone
Speaker 1: to hear it. And so we'll see what happens with
Speaker 1: that and people getting various a. Blind Scott's planning on
Speaker 1: doing stand up comedy Poppy Picking with Poppy, who everyone hates.
Speaker 1: A lot of regular callers hate Poppy because he's got
Speaker 1: his own segment now and he's there. He's gonna do
Speaker 1: a monologue Plastered Paul. I do not believe will be
Speaker 1: part of this, but if he did take part in this,
Speaker 1: he'd be the Archie Bunker. He'd do like racist stuff.
Speaker 1: After that verbal Octagon, I feel like Blind Scott should
Speaker 1: do a one man band routine. Yeah, I think I
Speaker 1: told him that the other day. I said, you should
Speaker 1: mimic the Rainforest Cafe. You ever been to the Rainforest
Speaker 1: Cafe where you just do a bunch of weird animal
Speaker 1: sounds like you're out in the jungle, And that's what
Speaker 1: he did in the Octagon. He just started making weird
Speaker 1: odd sounds, like different animals you'd see, like if you
Speaker 1: were Tarzan and you were out in a jungle and
Speaker 1: you had your machete and you were swinging from vines
Speaker 1: and you had a rope and that's how that would go.
Speaker 1: That was the highlight of that octagon. It was just ridiculous.
Speaker 1: Like he's sitting by himself, he's got his dog Dylan
Speaker 1: with him, and he just starts doing all kinds of
Speaker 1: wild sound effects. It was. It was nuts a little
Speaker 1: time for let's get scientifical. Let's get scientifical. These are
Speaker 1: actual science stories, and we say is this real? Is
Speaker 1: this bullshit? And it's a tribute to that old show
Speaker 1: on Showtime. Penn and Teller had a show by that name,
Speaker 1: and so the first story from him, let's get scientific.
Speaker 1: What comes out of the farming world. We have a
Speaker 1: lot of listeners who farm in Kansas and Nebraska and
Speaker 1: Iowa who listened to us, and they spend a lot
Speaker 1: of their time on attractors and whatnot, living the farming life.
Speaker 1: So now when I fly from West coast to East coast,
Speaker 1: I occasionally we'll look down and we probably all do
Speaker 1: this over what they call flyover country, and all you
Speaker 1: can see is nothing but film fields of different crops
Speaker 1: right right, a lot of wheat whatever it might be well,
Speaker 1: soon those fields will look much different, Danny. They there
Speaker 1: were The story from the science world here says that
Speaker 1: we could be seeing soon multi eye colored fields of
Speaker 1: the future in farming. They're testing this actually in England. Now,
Speaker 1: what do you think the purpose is of having multi
Speaker 1: colored fields in the future of farming? What do you
Speaker 1: think this would be, Danny? So that you could do
Speaker 1: more murals of Tupac, Biggie and Kobe's face. Oh you've
Speaker 1: seen this story before, You've No, I've seen the murals. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: the murals are not the reasons that the reason why no. Um.
Speaker 1: They claim that they're testing this out. They're calling it
Speaker 1: cameo cropping. Okay, it's a test run. This This seems
Speaker 1: like bull bullpucky to me. But the science community believes
Speaker 1: that using spectacularly bright multicolored fields is a technique. It's
Speaker 1: called camel cropping. As I said, it's undergoing trials right
Speaker 1: now in the UK. It's being used to confuse pests.
Speaker 1: And so what they do is the soil is dried red, blue,
Speaker 1: green or whatever color to hide emerging like sugar beet
Speaker 1: crops from disease and whatnot. And so they claim that
Speaker 1: they think the pests have there been such a problem
Speaker 1: here and because all the environmental people have banned so
Speaker 1: many pesticides from from farming, that the bugs are just
Speaker 1: taking over, and so they think that this will be
Speaker 1: a way to keep the bugs at bay. That sounds
Speaker 1: like malooney to me, that's what that sounds like. I'm
Speaker 1: going Bologney. Don't know. If you see the new Jurassic
Speaker 1: Park film, there's these huge locusts on steroids. Yeah, they
Speaker 1: were killing the farmlands across the country. It could happen, Ben,
Speaker 1: that movie was based on a true story. Yeah, I'm scared.
Speaker 1: I'm shaking. I'm shaking right now, Danny, I need my medicine.
Speaker 1: So I mentioned I saw dolphins. I was out whale watching,
Speaker 1: so a bunch of dolphins and science. They love the dolphins,
Speaker 1: they claim. Now there's a new story out that says,
Speaker 1: according to do a research paper, that dolphins are so cultured.
Speaker 1: How cultured are they that they even enjoy listening to
Speaker 1: Beethoven and Bach? I don't know, but this m it
Speaker 1: seems a lotte. They seem like sports radio fans to me,
Speaker 1: I think they listened to overnight sports radio because I'm
Speaker 1: not sure, if you're familiar with this, Danny. The dolphin
Speaker 1: does not have a bed. There's no bed in the ocean.
Speaker 1: So the dolphins always gonna be moved, and at night
Speaker 1: they gotta be moving. What better way to listen enjoy
Speaker 1: the night in the ocean than listen to some marginal
Speaker 1: overnight sports radio. Yeah, the soothing sounds of the Mallard militia.
Speaker 1: Damn right, all right, A milky sea has been caught
Speaker 1: on camera for the first time ever. Danny, it's not
Speaker 1: exciting now I saw this story. Yeah, that's the first
Speaker 1: time ever the Indian ocean. Now, this has been a
Speaker 1: legend that has been passed from generation to generation. There's
Speaker 1: stories of surface of the ocean turning completely white, and
Speaker 1: it's been passed down for hundreds of years, but nobody
Speaker 1: had ever actually taken photos of it. And now they have. Now,
Speaker 1: now they have, they claim this is all bacteria. The
Speaker 1: milky sea caused by luminous bacteria. They are communicating with
Speaker 1: each other and they triggered a glowing response. Just everything's right.
Speaker 1: The sweet spot is reached. The white sea went for
Speaker 1: thirty nine thousand square miles. But it's the first time
Speaker 1: I ever captured on camera. I wish we could show
Speaker 1: you the photo, but the crew used images with a
Speaker 1: smartphone and a go pro and they captured it all
Speaker 1: right there in the Indian Sea. And it's pretty wild
Speaker 1: to think that this thing has been this has going
Speaker 1: on for as long as the oceans have been around.
Speaker 1: I assume people have talked about it, sailors have talked
Speaker 1: about it, and only recently did we actually get photos
Speaker 1: of this. Pretty crazy, Yeah, it is. And you know,
Speaker 1: we have a crazy looking sea right here in southern California,
Speaker 1: the Salton Sea, oh, which is going away. Yeah have
Speaker 1: you seen that? Yeah, they're digging up all kinds of
Speaker 1: old World War two things and whatnot, and not that
Speaker 1: World War two was was there, but they tested a
Speaker 1: lot of the vehicles and whatnot, right, and that it's
Speaker 1: really creepy, and there's tons of homes that are boarded up,
Speaker 1: and the stars movie stars used to vacation there back
Speaker 1: in the fifties and sixties and then all the fish
Speaker 1: started dying and there was all this corrosion and god,
Speaker 1: it's really gross now. But if you've ever been there,
Speaker 1: it's one of those places where you're like, oh my god,
Speaker 1: I could afford property here. Yeah, and they imagine the
Speaker 1: people that bought houses there, and then they they realized, well,
Speaker 1: wait a minute, no one can actually live here. You
Speaker 1: cant Actually, you're not supposed to go in the water here,
Speaker 1: You're supposed to stay away. This is not good. This
Speaker 1: is not good for human consumption. And uh yeah, that's uh,
Speaker 1: that's a problem. Alright, last one real quick. Let's get scientifical.
Speaker 1: And you know how there's like a big hurricane and
Speaker 1: they named them, the Weather Service named them, right, yeah, Well,
Speaker 1: a group of scientists have have decided that we need
Speaker 1: to do that for heat waves, that they should do
Speaker 1: the same thing. They claim that this will better alert people.
Speaker 1: Oh man, Shirley is gonna be one hot bitch. Yeah.
Speaker 1: So they claim that this will help people because I
Speaker 1: guess people don't realize when it's gonna be hot unless
Speaker 1: you put a name on it, you know, Hattie Helen
Speaker 1: or you know, smoking the Smoke Show, Sarah, you know,
Speaker 1: whatever it might be. So I think we're good. I
Speaker 1: don't know that we need to have name. Are there
Speaker 1: so many more heat waves than there are hurricanes? You
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying? That's lame? Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's
Speaker 1: just dumb anyway, all right, we gotta get out of
Speaker 1: here any to promote Danny and Andy. All Saturday, a wonderful,
Speaker 1: glorious day here, the sixteenth day of the month of July.
Speaker 1: I will be sitting in bumper to bumper traffic on
Speaker 1: the one oh one Freeway on my way to the
Speaker 1: beautiful FSR Studios and even more beautiful Sherman Oaks, California,
Speaker 1: unless it's not the most beautiful city in southern California.
Speaker 1: And it's gonna be just Jeff Schwartz and Steve Hartman show,
Speaker 1: So Hartman and Schwartz, and then after that it's gonna
Speaker 1: be the from Salam and Brian No show. May the
Speaker 1: Schwartz be with you? I'm in command. Sure well, they
Speaker 1: will be with you or he will be. All right,
Speaker 1: we'll get out of here. Have a great rest your
Speaker 1: Saturday mail bag on Sunday. We will talk to you
Speaker 1: then later. Skater, Hey, all right, so you realize you're
Speaker 1: like the only guy left that uses that technology. Yeah,
Speaker 1: what do you think about the oil? That is a
Speaker 1: classic line, helmet man, We just got a new drop