Speaker 1: Okay, Michelle, here's a real ass adulting question for you.
Speaker 1: Favorite shore to do, least favorite sort to do and
Speaker 1: why go go go.
Speaker 2: Favorite favorite sort do is definitely cleaning the kitchen counter
Speaker 2: and like I'm making my bed because they're very simple.
Speaker 2: I can get it done in five minutes and it
Speaker 2: just like makes me feel like the place is clean.
Speaker 3: Least favorite garbage, Yeah, I'm so cue.
Speaker 2: I went to college. I'm a black person with freckles
Speaker 2: and I'm Caribbean. That's a big deal. I don't want
Speaker 2: to take garbage out.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that that trifecta. You don't want to deal with garbage.
Speaker 3: That trifecta is trifling.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yet you wordplay put it on a magnet?
Speaker 5: Do you want to ask me?
Speaker 3: Not really? Ow? Hey, everybody, I'm a show hotel and
Speaker 3: I'm Jordan Carlos.
Speaker 1: I like how you said that, And welcome to adultings
Speaker 1: for w NIS Studio.
Speaker 2: In this episode, we hear from three really amazing people.
Speaker 3: You have such good stories. We have Joye L. Johnson.
Speaker 5: Indeed, we also have Julia, Rosie.
Speaker 2: And Beggar also just FYI, guys, we talk about some
Speaker 2: really personal stuff and yeah it might be dark. Yeah
Speaker 2: it might be crazy, but I think everybody goes through
Speaker 2: something and we need to create a space to talk
Speaker 2: about it, and that's what we did in this episode.
Speaker 6: I hope you enjoyed the rye.
Speaker 3: I'm I'm just curious. Make some noise. If you're in
Speaker 3: your twenties, that's.
Speaker 5: All they can give. They're the battery is always like
Speaker 5: they're tired of.
Speaker 3: Paying these taxes. Y'all got to get the fun.
Speaker 7: Together, okay, because I have a navy.
Speaker 2: Blazer on and red lips and I'm ready to give
Speaker 2: it to you like a Delta attendant.
Speaker 3: Yeah, chicken a puss, some motherfucker.
Speaker 2: I loove like Sam Jackson and Julianna Martin Lee's had
Speaker 2: a baby.
Speaker 3: I'm like stick. So I'm fucking playing.
Speaker 2: Sometimes when I think I've done bad in my career,
Speaker 2: like oh I should have done this, I'm just like,
Speaker 2: just remember Sam Jackson did Snakes.
Speaker 3: On a plane and he was Okay, did you see it?
Speaker 5: It was good in bad. I saw it a bunch
Speaker 5: of times.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you know me, you know what's about. Okay, So
Speaker 3: Jordan came over this week.
Speaker 2: He always makes fun of me because I had a
Speaker 2: five S C phone or C S whatever the fuck
Speaker 2: I got a new phone, And so Jordan came over
Speaker 2: this week and it was to celebrate the new phone.
Speaker 3: Just kidding, He's not.
Speaker 2: I like to see my bundles of joy, and uh my,
Speaker 2: there was laundry everywhere, and like I like to apologize
Speaker 2: when my house is not a proper representation of who
Speaker 2: I am.
Speaker 3: Do you know what I mean?
Speaker 2: Like you can have some dishes in the sink, but
Speaker 2: the countertop cannot be messy when something comes over, because
Speaker 2: it's just like ew, you live like that. And I
Speaker 2: felt bad because it was a very imprompt to visit
Speaker 2: and I was just like, you know, like my bed
Speaker 2: wasn't made, there was dishes in the sink with stepping
Speaker 2: over laundry, and I was.
Speaker 5: Just like there was no judgments.
Speaker 1: I mean, you have kids, so it's like everything Like
Speaker 1: their room was immaculate, immaculate.
Speaker 5: It was like, so their.
Speaker 2: Room was amazing and my room looked like the Hangover movie.
Speaker 5: I mean that's you know what I gonna happen.
Speaker 8: You know what?
Speaker 3: This is like a very quick cleaning situation for me.
Speaker 3: I stuff shipping draws.
Speaker 5: Is that what you do?
Speaker 2: I stuff stuff in draws? I have like seven junk
Speaker 2: draws by accident.
Speaker 5: Cool, I random applause.
Speaker 1: Whose closet stuffer is like if you have somebody come
Speaker 1: over you just like.
Speaker 3: Everything falls out.
Speaker 5: I was such a closet stuffer back in the day.
Speaker 3: It's like that sounds like something else, And now I'm willing.
Speaker 5: To come out close and stuffer. All right, that's what
Speaker 5: I do. Stove top, stove top, all right, just water.
Speaker 2: You know, I always felt like you could tell so
Speaker 2: much about somebody when you go to their house and
Speaker 2: announce and look at their bathroom sink.
Speaker 5: Oh, has it got the Tuesday stain up top?
Speaker 3: So many says yuck? Have you ever wiped it?
Speaker 5: Yeah?
Speaker 3: Can I see that old hair around the toilet seat?
Speaker 3: I'm like, how do you.
Speaker 5: Live like this?
Speaker 3: Your animal? Your animal, especially boys on wash their no doubt.
Speaker 5: I always bathroom clean.
Speaker 2: If you want a dirty toilet, saint, nobody wants to
Speaker 2: suck your day.
Speaker 3: It's two minutes. You gotta clean tarlet.
Speaker 9: You bet very clean, and you can't handle me and
Speaker 9: my worst you.
Speaker 2: Know what happened the other day. Okay, I'm just gonna
Speaker 2: switch gears for two point two. I can talk about
Speaker 2: cleaning all day. We have a lot of visitors dop
Speaker 2: buy the house to like they had the babies and stuff,
Speaker 2: and like one of my one of my friend's husbands
Speaker 2: is like one of these like inappropriate huggers.
Speaker 5: Oh yeah, yeah yeah.
Speaker 2: Like he'll take it's like we're doing a slow dance
Speaker 2: and he'll go and tight and hold it and I'm
Speaker 2: like nice to the too. Yeah, the underneath he gets
Speaker 2: like the he cups the back fat on the bottom.
Speaker 3: I'm like, this is this is very intimate. No, I
Speaker 3: don't like it.
Speaker 2: What do you What do you do when like somebody's
Speaker 2: boyfriend or girlfriend has just like got the wondering eye?
Speaker 3: Do you tell them?
Speaker 5: I don't know.
Speaker 1: I think when you have like a guy with a
Speaker 1: wondering eye, it's important to call it out, but in
Speaker 1: a way that it's like bulletproof where you don't get
Speaker 1: fucked over, right, Like so maybe you could say something
Speaker 1: like how I go like I just feel that, I
Speaker 1: feel that, and.
Speaker 5: They're using I statements sometimes Gerald.
Speaker 3: Jerald did this happen in nineteen four?
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah in France.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that he isn't as respectful to you as he
Speaker 1: could be. Oh shit, what think what I'm talking about?
Speaker 5: All Right? That's what you do.
Speaker 2: But that's the thing too, How could like, what is
Speaker 2: the line between flirting and being inappropriate?
Speaker 1: I think flirting is inappropriate, Like you don't flirt, you
Speaker 1: don't flirt with somebody else's like yeah, yeah, friend, if
Speaker 1: you're in a relationship.
Speaker 5: You're not, Like I want to fuging Gerald.
Speaker 1: This is Gerald from France who doesn't have a hold
Speaker 1: on the English language. And it's like, you know, I'm more,
Speaker 1: you know, like, uh.
Speaker 5: We should get this show, We should get the show start.
Speaker 5: Are you all ready for the show? Yes?
Speaker 2: Our first guest on this fucking episode of adulting is
Speaker 2: so fucking I'm.
Speaker 3: Just talking.
Speaker 10: Podcast like this fucking ship. Please shake this person tired,
Speaker 10: look at the It's okay, all right. Our next guest
Speaker 10: is amazing. She's wonderful. She plays all over town. You
Speaker 10: go full lovelhood titties as I did too.
Speaker 5: You can't say anything. You putting me in a very
Speaker 5: awkward position. All right, I agree with what you said.
Speaker 11: All right, guys, let's please put your hands together. John Joy, you.
Speaker 3: Stick here, he is your mic that's.
Speaker 12: Joy?
Speaker 3: Hid.
Speaker 5: How you doing? Hey? How you doing? What? What's that?
Speaker 3: You are a good friend to the end.
Speaker 2: We are pretty new in our friendship, and we decided
Speaker 2: to test our friendship. And we went to Ikea on
Speaker 2: a Sunday. What the lines were long and yeah, and
Speaker 2: the mouth was dark.
Speaker 5: It was.
Speaker 3: And we tried to get food and we just didn't
Speaker 3: we trying.
Speaker 2: To get food and it did feel like an episode
Speaker 2: of Oranges and New Black. I was like, do we
Speaker 2: stay here? Do we wait for them to come get us?
Speaker 2: We're just hold like we about to like hold fucking
Speaker 2: we tried.
Speaker 5: I don't know it was.
Speaker 3: It was no, I don't need.
Speaker 5: Did just do?
Speaker 3: Give it up for thank you? Next, tell me tell
Speaker 3: me a little bit about how you grew up.
Speaker 5: How I grew up.
Speaker 12: I grew up little girl in New Jersey, Jersey in
Speaker 12: the hell yes people, yes, yes Jersey. I'm Jersey girl
Speaker 12: from you in New Jersey.
Speaker 3: And I grew up.
Speaker 5: I actually was doing.
Speaker 12: Going to school illegally because I grew up in the girl.
Speaker 5: I would go too. I broke the law to go
Speaker 5: to school.
Speaker 12: This is what real black people do. We had the
Speaker 12: good house on the the good block and the bad neighborhood,
Speaker 12: which was the Starrs, New Jersey, and then I would
Speaker 12: go to my aunt's house during the week in Union,
Speaker 12: New Jersey, and I would go to school illegally.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and I got caught a couple of times.
Speaker 5: That's wow. I mean you did what you had to do. Yeah,
Speaker 5: I did. When you when did you know you were
Speaker 5: gonna like be a comedian? Was it in school? Were
Speaker 5: you like cracking people up in class and things like that?
Speaker 12: I was always the observer, so I was a sit
Speaker 12: in that corner. Did you hate that question?
Speaker 5: Okay?
Speaker 2: Should stock? That's like, that's such a stock question. Did
Speaker 2: you know it was a lie? While you were going
Speaker 2: to school? You were just like, this is what I
Speaker 2: gotta do, Like you knew the difference between like lies until.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I was super smart, So yeah, I know. And
Speaker 3: then how did your mom explain to you? Because your
Speaker 3: mom's like, don't lie to me, but lie when you're
Speaker 3: in school exactly, which.
Speaker 5: Is why I knew.
Speaker 12: I was like, oh, no, adults know what they're doing,
Speaker 12: Like I knew that from a child. I was like, Oh,
Speaker 12: everyone's just fucking shooting the ship here, troubleshooting.
Speaker 5: So how'd you get caught?
Speaker 3: They had private investigators that would, yeah, would follow you.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 12: I've never talked about this before that's hilarious, investigator, Yeah,
Speaker 12: I would follow you.
Speaker 3: Yeah, because it's because it costs money.
Speaker 12: So if you're supposed to, if you want to go
Speaker 12: to a better school district, you know't live in that
Speaker 12: school district. You got to pay money, like at a
Speaker 12: private school. So if they suspect somebody does not live
Speaker 12: in the area, they will follow.
Speaker 3: You have friends you keep in touch with from that school. No,
Speaker 3: did you have a crush?
Speaker 5: Of course crushed?
Speaker 3: What was his name?
Speaker 12: I don't remember anyway, do you have I'm my mother's
Speaker 12: only child, but I have half siblings instead.
Speaker 5: Are they in comedy too or no?
Speaker 12: No, no, no, no, but my half siblings are also artists, and
Speaker 12: all of our parents collectively are doctors and nurses.
Speaker 5: And then we're all.
Speaker 3: Okay because we show without the ripe comfory.
Speaker 12: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Yeah, so a lot of a lot of people find company.
Speaker 3: Let's not get dark. I'm trying to keep a light.
Speaker 5: You know.
Speaker 12: Those stories that I never trusted Bill Cosby, and I
Speaker 12: was like, don't get it dark.
Speaker 5: But yeah, my father's the reason.
Speaker 12: Because my father is a doctor and my mother was
Speaker 12: his you know, mistress or whatever, and I was the
Speaker 12: side baby. So I was the other side had the
Speaker 12: other perspective, and you had a wife and kids that
Speaker 12: were like the trophy wife and kids that were the
Speaker 12: Cosby Show.
Speaker 3: And I was like, that's bullshit.
Speaker 12: I don't know, like how your giving spirit fingers to this.
Speaker 5: Alone? Oh my god?
Speaker 3: So many follow ups? Yeah, so many follows.
Speaker 2: I mean talk about I mean, we talk about adulting,
Speaker 2: but that's like next level. People talk about I can't
Speaker 2: find an apartment. I like, you were just like seeing
Speaker 2: some ship as a kid, kid, And did you did
Speaker 2: you ever resent your mom for this or was she
Speaker 2: like your best friend?
Speaker 3: Talk about a therapy that I do.
Speaker 12: Go to therapy, guys, every fantastic, you know, because the
Speaker 12: whole life you're like dead we dad, hate the dead dad.
Speaker 5: But then you're like, mom, would he come and visit you?
Speaker 5: Guys doing I will add a layer to it.
Speaker 3: I would go to his house and be there.
Speaker 5: But he didn't acknowledge me as his kids.
Speaker 12: Oh what, I don't know how y'all started these questions,
Speaker 12: But ask a comedian about their childhood.
Speaker 3: Great idea, guys, Well I want I'm a great idea.
Speaker 5: So did you know you always wanted to be a comedian?
Speaker 5: She's like, no, you want to ask him dark life
Speaker 5: is spreading.
Speaker 12: It's glad I put on the waterproof mass scary.
Speaker 3: I'm just saying, like that, has that has shaped you
Speaker 3: for sure?
Speaker 2: Way? Do you have trust issues with men?
Speaker 5: I'm asking the same questions. I'm asking obvious questions.
Speaker 12: Okay, all right, you had a shitty child.
Speaker 5: So you can put your tears in that. Want you
Speaker 5: to carry your baggage? Oh my god, Oh my god,
Speaker 5: oh my god. It yeah, I can't agree.
Speaker 1: You know what, I've never heard that in your stand up.
Speaker 1: That is a very powerful thing. Have you thought of
Speaker 1: like putting it?
Speaker 12: We'll talk about having a deadbeat doctor dad, which is
Speaker 12: just a weird thing. So I've expounded on that, but
Speaker 12: haven't gotten that deep yet.
Speaker 5: You know, say that for the Get that on the Netflix.
Speaker 12: Yeah, y'all laugh in the beginning, and have you bitch
Speaker 12: just crying?
Speaker 3: No? I mean, okay, can I ask my next question?
Speaker 2: Yes, twenty nineteen, what's the most adult thing you want
Speaker 2: to do for yourself?
Speaker 12: I want to I wanna get my own radio show
Speaker 12: on serious Exam. All right, yeah, we're already in the
Speaker 12: works for that, so yes, yes, yes, yes, yeah, So
Speaker 12: currently you guys can listen to me, uh filling in
Speaker 12: for godfree on Serious except.
Speaker 5: Urban View Black Urban, but oh no, Urban View Black Black.
Speaker 3: Don Will was my guest on Valentine's Day. What did
Speaker 3: y'all talk about? Chocolate hearts?
Speaker 5: We talked about bombing. That's like one of my biggest things.
Speaker 2: We gotta say bombing on stage because you know, bombing
Speaker 2: on stage.
Speaker 3: But I talked about bombing.
Speaker 12: You talked about like, you know, we're gonna talk about
Speaker 12: bombing on save and I and I told the listeners
Speaker 12: to call in about life bombs. And this one guy
Speaker 12: calls in and he's like, he went on a cruise
Speaker 12: with his girlfriend, proposed to her on the first day
Speaker 12: of the cruise and she said no, no, and they.
Speaker 3: Had to spend the rest of the cruise together. Where
Speaker 3: is she said no? But she was on a cruise.
Speaker 5: You know what a cruise? I think on the last
Speaker 5: day you gotta say, like, how about now, you know
Speaker 5: that's a.
Speaker 3: Last day question for sure.
Speaker 12: Listen to Joan on What Serious ExM Channel one twenty series.
Speaker 7: Yeah, oh my.
Speaker 3: God, what crazy history.
Speaker 10: Yes, he's.
Speaker 3: Welcome back to it, don't together? And then we thought
Speaker 3: about how hard it must be for someone to propose
Speaker 3: to another person, it's it's.
Speaker 5: It's not easy. How did you? How did how did
Speaker 5: heist do it?
Speaker 2: We were in Spain, because that's what I do. We
Speaker 2: were in Spain and and we was our first vacation together.
Speaker 2: I had no idea he was gonna do it. And
Speaker 2: I thought he was just being extra. And he wants
Speaker 2: to like ride a motorcycle and I was like no.
Speaker 2: And then he wanted to sail a boat. I was like, no, chrystals,
Speaker 2: and then and you wanted to.
Speaker 3: Do all these things.
Speaker 2: I was like, why are he being so extra? This
Speaker 2: European man being so extra? And then he's like, let's
Speaker 2: get a bottle of cava Spanish champagne. Stop it, let's
Speaker 2: sit and drink it. I was like, that's must be
Speaker 2: sitting and drinking on a fucking beach. And he only
Speaker 2: brought one bottle. I was like, this is gonna be
Speaker 2: a short night. And then he's like, let's climb as
Speaker 2: a mountain. I was like, why is he making me exercise?
Speaker 5: It was that night.
Speaker 2: Half the time, I think he's trying to kill me
Speaker 2: because he wants to take a long walk at night.
Speaker 3: He's like, let's go see what's in the shed. I
Speaker 3: was like no, no, no, no, no, no no, no,
Speaker 3: I'm good. I'm good. Nothing good happens in the shed.
Speaker 5: He's like de Niro and Goodfellas, just.
Speaker 3: Exactly.
Speaker 5: So.
Speaker 3: Yeah, he popped the question and it was like, so sweet.
Speaker 3: I had no idea. How did you pop the question?
Speaker 12: Oh?
Speaker 5: We asked each other at the same time.
Speaker 1: I was like, do you want to because she's she's
Speaker 1: a childhood divorce and she she felt cynical about it,
Speaker 1: and I was like, I love you, want to spend
Speaker 1: the rest of my life for you. And she's like,
Speaker 1: but we talked about her for a couple days and
Speaker 1: it was like the same time, motherfucker.
Speaker 2: So uh.
Speaker 5: It was like will you marry me? And She's like,
Speaker 5: will you marry me? And I was like, yes, I will, Yes,
Speaker 5: it will. It was awesome.
Speaker 3: I was so dutch. I love it.
Speaker 5: Yeah, it was great.
Speaker 2: Guys, wear tell some questions about adulting. Are we gonna
Speaker 2: answer those questions?
Speaker 3: Bitch?
Speaker 5: You ready?
Speaker 8: Yes?
Speaker 3: I can't wait?
Speaker 1: Question time, Question number one about adulting. This is very
Speaker 1: good at handwriting. Is getting a turtle too much responsibility
Speaker 1: for a person who still sleeps in a twin.
Speaker 5: Bed a turtle. Look at that sh.
Speaker 1: Af af a f a f asking for a friend up.
Speaker 5: I don't know.
Speaker 1: I like you.
Speaker 5: You're interesting. You're like in this big great is sitting
Speaker 5: in New York sep twin.
Speaker 3: Maybe this person needs like a tiny house.
Speaker 1: I think that's great. You live in a dolls house
Speaker 1: and I think that's awesome. It depends on the size
Speaker 1: of the turtle. Are we talking about it like a tortuga, like.
Speaker 5: A sea turtle? We we're talking about a box turtle.
Speaker 5: What the fun we're talking about? Like, you know whatever,
Speaker 5: Let the turtle be small.
Speaker 4: I would say, get a finicky plant first and see
Speaker 4: how you do with that.
Speaker 5: Then let the turtle eat the plants, you know what
Speaker 5: I mean?
Speaker 3: Like, that's great, And turtles are a commitment. They last
Speaker 3: a long.
Speaker 1: Time, Yeah, a long time. But but like I feel
Speaker 1: that this person has it with it. I think you
Speaker 1: have it within you to have a turtle. Because you
Speaker 1: sound quirky as.
Speaker 3: Fuck and single as fuck. What's the question?
Speaker 5: You have some more questions? You can't do it? Do
Speaker 5: you actually need to flip a mattress? How long should
Speaker 5: i'm mattress? How long mattress last?
Speaker 7: That is prime adulting questions.
Speaker 5: Have we got a good questions? We have a question.
Speaker 5: It's a good question. Don what's your money? What you
Speaker 5: think about?
Speaker 1: What?
Speaker 5: I think that?
Speaker 1: Like the old school spring mattresses, you had to flip
Speaker 1: them to make sure they wore evenly.
Speaker 5: But I don't know about the phone situation, so I
Speaker 5: need to know about this. It's a fam mattress? Is
Speaker 5: it a tasks? Wait? Are you making fun of me?
Speaker 3: Or are you just saying it like that?
Speaker 5: I kinda, but I love you. I just want to say,
Speaker 5: castball mattress. I don't know that's fucking nice.
Speaker 3: Are you single? Who's helping you flip this ship?
Speaker 5: Flip it yourself?
Speaker 7: Yes?
Speaker 5: I think a mattress is supposed to last ten years, right,
Speaker 5: so it's like something like that. So maybe flipping at five?
Speaker 5: You don't flip a five? Okay, calm damn, all right,
Speaker 5: thank you. We got the fucking paper clip from Microsoft.
Speaker 5: Word over here. You don't flip a houl mattress.
Speaker 9: It's self flipping, all right, just asking goddamn, Okay, damn,
Speaker 9: the mattress king is here?
Speaker 3: Well the one they say Mama.
Speaker 5: Sleepies?
Speaker 3: Who bars for the rest of Joe.
Speaker 5: By your death bed. Love that all right? That's sleepy,
Speaker 5: they say, for the rest of your Okay, you know what?
Speaker 5: Fuck yeah, I love that.
Speaker 2: You just beat yourself up so easily. It's my favorite thing.
Speaker 2: Now you know how women feel all the time.
Speaker 5: Jesus. Okay, this one's interesting. Dog or boyfriend? Which is
Speaker 5: more adulting?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 3: I say the dog?
Speaker 5: You say the dogs?
Speaker 7: Yeah, that dog needs you mind.
Speaker 3: That dog depends on you, although both don't pick that
Speaker 3: ship up.
Speaker 5: That's good. That's good. I can't top that. Should we
Speaker 5: move on to our next guest?
Speaker 2: She's so amazing, she's a good friend, she's a fucking
Speaker 2: hilarious comedian actor.
Speaker 3: Please give it up for.
Speaker 7: Two girls high so we don't.
Speaker 2: I've known you for a long time, so I was
Speaker 2: just like, what can I ask you? You're like fucking anything,
Speaker 2: and there were so many things. Okay, you're Italian, your
Speaker 2: parents are from Italy, Yes, so you're like the real Italian.
Speaker 5: Yes.
Speaker 3: In high school, you want to date a black guy?
Speaker 3: What happened?
Speaker 8: I was interested in a black fella in high school
Speaker 8: and my Italian dad wasn't excited.
Speaker 4: Shocker, it was.
Speaker 8: They're old and I also from the suburbs of Boston.
Speaker 8: I mean, there's so many points against this whole situation.
Speaker 8: Oh yeah, waiting to happen, Yeah yeah, I mean the
Speaker 8: hope was that I was going to marry like one
Speaker 8: of their Italian plumber friends, you know what I mean,
Speaker 8: like that was to drain your pipes.
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, yes, very good. I'm so sorry. Yeah did
Speaker 5: you date this kid on the slide though?
Speaker 8: I mean I gave him a hand job and then
Speaker 8: he didn't talk to me afterwards, and then I was
Speaker 8: really sad.
Speaker 4: And then two years later I gave him another hand
Speaker 4: job and he still I was like, how many will
Speaker 4: take for you don't like me?
Speaker 5: Was the right hand the first time? And then like
Speaker 5: the left hand the next time?
Speaker 4: Or I get I get carpal tunnel, and then I
Speaker 4: sometimes do like a double.
Speaker 3: What's it like having immigrant parents?
Speaker 4: What's it like?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 5: It is?
Speaker 4: Well, you know, so I just learned about the term
Speaker 4: third culture kids. Do you know what that means? And
Speaker 4: it like really summed up not less's.
Speaker 8: On the plus sized T shirt at Asos, So was
Speaker 8: anyone you're raised by immigrant parents?
Speaker 3: Okay?
Speaker 4: So so third culture kids?
Speaker 8: And just turned out the term and then I went
Speaker 8: down a Google hole about it, and I felt so comforted.
Speaker 8: So basically, and it means is like, you are raised
Speaker 8: in America by one culture, but you don't fully feel
Speaker 8: American because you're being raised so strongly.
Speaker 4: By the other culture. However, then when you go to
Speaker 4: that culture, you were raised. So when I go to Italy,
Speaker 4: they call me American. So I kind of belong nowhere.
Speaker 3: Oh I understand that. Yeah, Jamaica, I'm American. In Jersey,
Speaker 3: I had the smelly lunch, yes, yes, yes. So when
Speaker 3: I met you, you were out of.
Speaker 2: College doing stand up and you were like you were
Speaker 2: engaged for a long time, and I remember we hung
Speaker 2: out and got drunk one night we just met.
Speaker 3: You're like, should I get married? I'm like, bitch, I
Speaker 3: don't know.
Speaker 2: Yeah, But then I was like, oh I love her,
Speaker 2: yeah Shamz Saez.
Speaker 5: And when I met you, you were married, but your
Speaker 5: husband was living in Boston and you were living in
Speaker 5: New York.
Speaker 2: Then she invited me to the whole wedding last minute.
Speaker 2: We knew each other for five minutes, and I went
Speaker 2: because everybody was going.
Speaker 4: Over, Yeah, you're fun.
Speaker 3: Why were you with? Why were you with homeboy for
Speaker 3: so long?
Speaker 4: So he was my college boyfriend who was my first boyfriend.
Speaker 8: You know, I call him like the on paper, like
Speaker 8: you know, on paper, it's like handsome, funny, smart, like
Speaker 8: there was no The hardest breakups are when you have
Speaker 8: no reason to break up with something.
Speaker 4: Right, there was like the floor of it all you've
Speaker 4: ever lingered?
Speaker 5: Yeah, you were lingered, all right, so go on?
Speaker 8: Yeah, you know, so I stayed because he was great
Speaker 8: and I was like, well, I'm never going to meet
Speaker 8: anyone better. He's wonderful and I loved him and I
Speaker 8: couldn't find a good reason anyways, I needed to separate
Speaker 8: so I could grow fly and uh yeah, and that's
Speaker 8: so then you know, I goes married for I was
Speaker 8: with him for nine years but only married one.
Speaker 4: And I like an expensive breakup. And but that's the thing, right,
Speaker 4: like you're with you're with.
Speaker 2: This person forever and never never, and there's like a
Speaker 2: crack in the relationship, right and then you put something
Speaker 2: very crazy on top of it, and it'll just break.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 8: It's like when people try to have a baby to
Speaker 8: save their marriage. Like it's the same thinking, yes, you.
Speaker 3: Can't have a baby to save your marriage. Even a dog,
Speaker 3: don't do that to that dog.
Speaker 4: Yeah, how was dating for.
Speaker 3: You when you broke up?
Speaker 2: Because if you you basically grew up with this boy,
Speaker 2: like you get him in college and now you're like
Speaker 2: in the dating world. Well, so I was.
Speaker 4: My plan was to go out and like explore.
Speaker 8: But then I gotten you another relationship a month later,
Speaker 8: and that was a long rebound that lasted a few years.
Speaker 7: I remember, yeah, I know, yes, So can I just
Speaker 7: say you know when.
Speaker 2: You're like no specifics, your friend is with somebody and
Speaker 2: you're like okay, and you you want to help them.
Speaker 3: You want to help them, you want to like it.
Speaker 7: I was so vulnerable, and I was vulnerable, and I
Speaker 7: was like.
Speaker 4: Well this new persons the opposite.
Speaker 8: And if you know that bullet porrige shouldn't work, then
Speaker 8: maybe this bullet porridge will be like the bears.
Speaker 4: You know, you get too hot.
Speaker 7: You called too hot and then and they.
Speaker 8: But then after I went to that breakup, I did
Speaker 8: commit to being single for a year and that was
Speaker 8: like the best year of my life.
Speaker 3: Like, there's no better person to love than yourself.
Speaker 7: I know, thank you.
Speaker 5: I think it was Mary. How can I love somebody
Speaker 5: else if I can't love myself enough to know afford
Speaker 5: that song.
Speaker 2: In closing, Julia Rossie, you have you've been through like
Speaker 2: a lot of adult ship very young.
Speaker 3: Uh huh, what do you.
Speaker 2: Find is the best the best situation for adulting for
Speaker 2: yourself right now? Uh?
Speaker 3: Can you what do you mean to be an adult?
Speaker 4: To throw to like a philosophy sort of.
Speaker 8: Not be I think the biggest thing I've learned that
Speaker 8: makes me feel like an individual and an adult is
Speaker 8: uh not like live a life of shoots and instead
Speaker 8: live a life of like wance and actually being connected
Speaker 8: with my thoughts.
Speaker 4: But should like should get married?
Speaker 8: I should be this, I should have this job, I
Speaker 8: should like all that stuff like should ruin everything?
Speaker 4: So I think that's like, yeah, I.
Speaker 3: Shouldn't say this.
Speaker 4: Yeah, Julie Rossi, everybody.
Speaker 5: I love that.
Speaker 12: Mess.
Speaker 5: Julia ros Welcome back to adulting. That's another question you
Speaker 5: want to answers.
Speaker 3: Que should grown men play video games? Not if you
Speaker 3: want to get fucked?
Speaker 1: I think that answers that's your question. My question is this,
Speaker 1: as an adult, what would you do for a million dollars?
Speaker 1: That's literally the question, guys. It is written by an
Speaker 1: eight year old boy.
Speaker 7: You like going.
Speaker 5: For some dead as birthcase I don't know what I
Speaker 5: would do it for a million dollars A lot, a lot.
Speaker 3: Is it ever too late to figure out what you
Speaker 3: want to do with your life? Never? Never?
Speaker 1: You know what? You know?
Speaker 2: What really gets in my nerves though, people that talk
Speaker 2: about doing ship and never do it, Shut the fuck
Speaker 2: up and do it, or don't find someone else to
Speaker 2: talk to you about it, because it feels like I've
Speaker 2: had the same conversation for five fucking years, and I'm like,
Speaker 2: I'm already doing the thing you want to do.
Speaker 3: Oh, you gotta do it.
Speaker 2: Don't worry about getting it right or perfect or what
Speaker 2: people are gonna say or looking bad.
Speaker 3: Just fucking do it.
Speaker 5: Do that first pancake, Get it out, Get it out.
Speaker 5: That's right, all right.
Speaker 3: We gotta bring our last guest down. Is very exciting.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, she's wonderful and I love her. I
Speaker 3: know you will too. Please give it up for.
Speaker 4: Beg even show.
Speaker 3: Okay, Hey, where are you from? How'd you grow up?
Speaker 3: I'm from Boston and how did I grow up?
Speaker 5: Yeah? Somebody said, like we have we have a spoiled
Speaker 5: French prince in the audience. Take him away, Take him away.
Speaker 3: I know you grew up in Boston, but I don't
Speaker 3: know what point Boston is like very little Boston, I sound.
Speaker 3: I try to sound tough and say Boston, but it's
Speaker 3: really Newton, so it's like a right. Yeah, it's like
Speaker 3: a privileged suburb. But I try to be tough about it.
Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, yeah right. And what kind of kid were
Speaker 3: you in high school? I just liked everyone. I liked everyone,
Speaker 3: and no one liked when I got everyone together, like
Speaker 3: they didn't like each other. Yeah, do you know what
Speaker 3: I mean?
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm that person too. I have friend groups. You
Speaker 2: try to bring them together and it don't work.
Speaker 3: It doesn't work.
Speaker 5: Yeah, that happened to me.
Speaker 1: I literally I was trying to put together a little
Speaker 1: brunchy brunch and uh, two people that don't like each
Speaker 1: other in the text chain, right, I was like meet
Speaker 1: at this time.
Speaker 5: They came and then they told me we don't like
Speaker 5: each other, and I was like, why did you come me?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 2: So you have she has three beautiful children, thank you? Yes,
Speaker 2: and you have two girls and a boy.
Speaker 3: Yes, good, you're doing good.
Speaker 5: What are their ages?
Speaker 3: What are their names? Michelle? Stop it, no, I'm kidding.
Speaker 3: What are their ages? There are seven eleven and thirteen.
Speaker 2: Oh wow, Arabia, Sophie, Liam, Yes, please, my kids.
Speaker 3: Wanted to come to this show. They yeah, And then
Speaker 3: Sophie was like, is Michelle going to talk about her
Speaker 3: brown titties?
Speaker 5: Yeah?
Speaker 7: Yeah, yeah, bang bab brown to the tame Bag.
Speaker 3: Wait, love you. This is the same one. This is
Speaker 3: the same one. The other day. We're talking about peer pressure.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: I said, what are you going to say if someone
Speaker 3: offers you drugs or alcohol? And she said, that's easy, mommy,
Speaker 3: I'll just tell them I can't have that. I'm pregnant.
Speaker 5: That's good, that's what you want to do.
Speaker 7: That's good.
Speaker 5: That's good.
Speaker 3: It's real good.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 2: So how do you go about navigating them in this
Speaker 2: crazy world of having two independent, thoughtful girls?
Speaker 7: Yeah?
Speaker 3: Also, how do you raise a boy to not be
Speaker 3: a dick? Right? Well, he's seven, so I don't know
Speaker 3: what's going to happen with him. But but girls, I
Speaker 3: don't know honestly, And I'm not trying to be like cheesy.
Speaker 3: I just think raise them with humor. I if someone
Speaker 3: doesn't have a sense of humor, something's really weird. If
Speaker 3: you can't laugh at yourself, I don't know what your
Speaker 3: story is. But I just think raise them with humor.
Speaker 3: I give them advice I know is wrong like that,
Speaker 3: I know I say it and they're like, well, well,
Speaker 3: so my daughter's thirteen. And I was like, okay, you
Speaker 3: have to treat your regina like it's your iPhone. Take
Speaker 3: care of it like that, keep it clean, you know
Speaker 3: know where it is, and don't put any dicks on it,
Speaker 3: like just don't know what you got to update it updated,
Speaker 3: gonna charge it?
Speaker 5: Absolutely, only use your thumb.
Speaker 6: I don't know.
Speaker 3: I just feel like they take her their phone so well,
Speaker 3: and I'm like, how can I get them to protect
Speaker 3: their vagina like that?
Speaker 5: And so that's the case absolutely.
Speaker 2: I asked you before the show if I can ask
Speaker 2: you anything, Yes, you can, okay, because I've known you
Speaker 2: for a while and I know that this really, really
Speaker 2: fucking sad thing happened to you, and I want to
Speaker 2: be mindful and respectful, but I also, you know, want
Speaker 2: to talk about it, especially on this platform, because I
Speaker 2: think it's important to talk about things that happened to us.
Speaker 2: Because for me, I had four miscarriages in two years,
Speaker 2: and for someone who just like screams their feelings on stage,
Speaker 2: I felt so lonely. I had no one to talk to,
Speaker 2: which is which is important, right because even if you
Speaker 2: don't know how to talk about something with somebody else,
Speaker 2: it's like you should still listen to them. So can
Speaker 2: you just tell us what you went through if you
Speaker 2: feel comfortable enough.
Speaker 3: Yeah, of course.
Speaker 5: Okay.
Speaker 3: So so I got pregnant. I'm married, so it was
Speaker 3: okay I should say that first I was married, we
Speaker 3: got pregnant, everything was fantastic. I went to the doctor,
Speaker 3: they said he's due tomorrow. The next day was my birthday,
Speaker 3: so I was like, this is amazing. Everything was amazing.
Speaker 3: October eighth, thank you, she remembered, good for you, Where's
Speaker 3: my gift? So so that evening I went to bed
Speaker 3: thinking maybe i'd be having him the next day, and
Speaker 3: I felt him moving, and I woke up and I
Speaker 3: did not feel him moving. So, long story short, I
Speaker 3: had a full term still birth. A lot of people
Speaker 3: don't know because you think, well, you can elect maybe
Speaker 3: to have a cesareans so you don't have to go
Speaker 3: through labor, because I'd never been through labor, but you
Speaker 3: do have to go through labor. So that was my
Speaker 3: first experience as a mom, and it was just the worst.
Speaker 3: I mean, it was a nightmare.
Speaker 2: I'm really trying not to cry because I have like
Speaker 2: very thick Amy Winehouse eyeliner on.
Speaker 3: I know it looks good.
Speaker 2: It looks good, and how has How did this shape
Speaker 2: your relationship with your husband and most importantly yourself?
Speaker 3: It definitely changed who I am. I don't ever one
Speaker 3: has their own experience in this room, and you don't,
Speaker 3: and I know you do, and it's a different experience.
Speaker 3: I think if you've been through grief, there's there's a
Speaker 3: thread of it that's the same, no matter what form
Speaker 3: it took. So if it's your dad or your mom,
Speaker 3: or a sibling or your The thing about a child
Speaker 3: is that it wasn't supposed to happen. That's how it feels.
Speaker 3: So it feels more natural if if you kind of
Speaker 3: could see it coming at some point. So it definitely
Speaker 3: changed I am. It's like the me before that and
Speaker 3: then the met after that. And I liked the me
Speaker 3: before that better. She was a little happier and friendlier,
Speaker 3: but my husband was amazing. That's how you know you
Speaker 3: married the right person when you go through something like
Speaker 3: or even have the right friends yes, friends yes, or
Speaker 3: even have the right parents. Yes, Oh well yeah, because
Speaker 3: like I love my parents, but they were useless.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 3: You know what, though everyone tries to make things better,
Speaker 3: like stop trying to make it better.
Speaker 7: Just let it be what it is like.
Speaker 3: And then I had a lot of time. I needed
Speaker 3: a lot of time, and I literally said to Ron,
Speaker 3: if you can't wait for me to be back, then
Speaker 3: sayonara and everyone did. But you have to respect people's time,
Speaker 3: their process, whatever it's going to take.
Speaker 2: Stop trying to We have to respect our own time
Speaker 2: and our process, because don't we beat ourselves up and
Speaker 2: we're like I gotta get over this.
Speaker 3: I gotta get up. Yeah, I gotta be happy. I
Speaker 3: gotta be out in the world.
Speaker 2: And so it's like no, but you can actually like
Speaker 2: stay in those sweats for like another fucking day and
Speaker 2: think about shit.
Speaker 1: Well, I think one of the good things is to
Speaker 1: learn that you know, you're not alone. I my wife
Speaker 1: and I had two miscarriages in a year, and it
Speaker 1: was like devastating. And once you start saying it, people
Speaker 1: are like I had that too, you know, Like yes,
Speaker 1: but people like to keep they like to do the
Speaker 1: Instagram version of life, right, the highlights of life. But
Speaker 1: you learned that the story is universal and that what's
Speaker 1: presented to you by like baby magazines and shit like
Speaker 1: that is just just the the only like the happy part.
Speaker 1: So so I mean in that way, like what you
Speaker 1: just said about being a different person, I definitely had
Speaker 1: a like it was a watershed, like yeah, like exactly
Speaker 1: like that. And yeah, I used to be a lot
Speaker 1: more care free, but now I pay my goddamn bills
Speaker 1: on time.
Speaker 5: I feel I feel a lot more like grown ass
Speaker 5: of a person care that. Yeah, yeah, I fill up
Speaker 5: my gas tank.
Speaker 2: Yeah I'm never going to divorce my husband, but if
Speaker 2: we do, it's because I got stuck on the side
Speaker 2: of a fucking road.
Speaker 3: Because he does not fill up a tank.
Speaker 5: He does.
Speaker 3: He's that ten dollars guy, right, He's a ten dollar guy.
Speaker 3: And it feels parsonal.
Speaker 2: You know why, because he's an attractive white male from
Speaker 2: your He thinks it's always gonna work out and people
Speaker 2: got to stop on the side of road for him.
Speaker 3: And it's very different when you don't have a gating
Speaker 3: hole between your legs. This she could happen to a bitch.
Speaker 3: Why are you not writing this down?
Speaker 5: This can't this is what you need to know.
Speaker 2: So you have, you have, you have gone through some
Speaker 2: major fucking shit and you're a boss ass bitch and
Speaker 2: you love life enough to fucking hang in there and
Speaker 2: create more life, right, Yes, what do you want for yourself?
Speaker 3: For myself?
Speaker 2: Yes, in terms of adulting or whether it's like embracing
Speaker 2: your inner child, like, what do you want for yourself?
Speaker 3: I never think about myself. Fuck Like, it's always about
Speaker 3: other people.
Speaker 5: I know, it really is.
Speaker 3: What do I want? I just I want if they're happy.
Speaker 3: I'm happy, if my kids are happy, my husband's happy.
Speaker 3: Honest to god, I'm happy. I just want everyone to
Speaker 3: be healthy. I want to be doing more. I think
Speaker 3: it's important as parents that we still have our outlets.
Speaker 3: You know, we're still creative, We're still.
Speaker 5: Not no.
Speaker 3: I think we still need to do things we love
Speaker 3: and show our kids that you can find things to
Speaker 3: do that you love to do. Want you guys to
Speaker 3: be happy. I don't know what do I want to do?
Speaker 2: If you could, like like work wise, like anything anything,
Speaker 2: anything it does.
Speaker 3: He's not wrong, it's not right.
Speaker 5: Do you know what I want to do?
Speaker 1: Oh God, I was just gonna say I want to
Speaker 1: go horseback riding that's all I want to go.
Speaker 3: Your only goal right now?
Speaker 5: No this year?
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's jeez, those Jesus So it's too tight for horseback.
Speaker 5: My jeans are fine, they have give it's writing this weekend,
Speaker 5: like you could, but I.
Speaker 7: Don't have time.
Speaker 5: I've got.
Speaker 2: You can't judge them on like his want okay, because
Speaker 2: like he probably doesn't have time to horseback, right, okay,
Speaker 2: So what do you want to do?
Speaker 3: It doesn't have to be horseback riding. I want to
Speaker 3: be I want to be like, oh, I can't say it.
Speaker 3: I want to be a working paid comedic writer and performer.
Speaker 1: Yeah, no money.
Speaker 3: It's okay to want that. It's okay to want that.
Speaker 3: There's nothing wrong with wanting. How long it took me
Speaker 3: to say that didn't fucked up own it?
Speaker 2: It's I was like, I can't tell it because there's
Speaker 2: so many basic bitches would not in a fucking say me,
Speaker 2: and like, I don't want to do it this, Well,
Speaker 2: what you've been through?
Speaker 3: I waited in a long line.
Speaker 2: Of Starbucks, get the fuck yeah yeah yeah, And I
Speaker 2: took twelve years off.
Speaker 3: I know I'm leaving. I took twelve years off. And
Speaker 3: Michelle was like it doesn't matter. You still are who
Speaker 3: you are, and yes, lose it. She has inspired me
Speaker 3: so much.
Speaker 5: Look at that show. This was a show for the ages, it.
Speaker 3: Was for all ages. This is so many amazing stories.
Speaker 3: I'm very proud of this episode.
Speaker 5: I am too, Yeah, Joel Johnson and Julia Rossie.
Speaker 3: And beg you Vidoccio. I learned something from people that
Speaker 3: I've known for a very long time, and I feel
Speaker 3: like that's very special too.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Adulting was produced by Blakeney Schick and Adanie Rubin. The
Speaker 2: Adulting team includes Joanna Solitariff Schumann, Joe Plored, Keecking, Zimma
Speaker 2: ed Haber, George Wellington, and Irene Trudell.
Speaker 3: The live show was produced by Christian Band.
Speaker 2: Their theme music is produced by Isaac Jokes, with additional
Speaker 2: music by.
Speaker 5: Don Will Don well And if you liked this episode, please.
Speaker 4: Like, rate, rate us or read review you were both.
Speaker 3: You got options on you.
Speaker 2: I mean, look, do you want me to put on
Speaker 2: a plus size ten Kney from Walmart, sit down, eat some.
Speaker 3: Chicken in a boat?
Speaker 7: I will.
Speaker 2: If you really want to know who I truly am,
Speaker 2: I will do that for you, and then you could
Speaker 2: review that, because I just want to get.
Speaker 3: Close to you.
Speaker 1: I see ten stars all around, and subscribe wherever you
Speaker 1: get your podcasts so you don't miss the next episode.
Speaker 2: That's right, And you know what, for women at least,
Speaker 2: if you're wearing a bansuit, there's nothing wrong with just.
Speaker 3: Like pulling it to the side to pink.
Speaker 2: You don't have to pull it all the way down
Speaker 2: because it's like very wet and sticking it hard to
Speaker 2: pull up and down.
Speaker 5: Yeah. Absolutely,