WEBVTT - Wanna Get Wasted Juice Boxes?

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<v Speaker 1>Hey, you want to go out and get wasted on

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<v Speaker 1>juice boxes. It's one more thing, one more thing. It'll

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<v Speaker 1>all make sense, Katie, Okay, shy. Why am I making

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<v Speaker 1>these hands in moments? I don't know. It's scaring me.

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<v Speaker 2>Stop it. So before we get to whatever that is,

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<v Speaker 2>the concept of being a human footstool came up on

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<v Speaker 2>the Armstrong and Getty showed today. Oh my god, yes

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<v Speaker 2>it did.

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<v Speaker 1>We got an email that suggesting that sleeve boy should

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<v Speaker 1>add that to his duties. Sleeve boy, sleeve boy, hands

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<v Speaker 1>and knees right now, Daddy's legs are tired.

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<v Speaker 2>I make him call me daddy. Oh man, that's rough.

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<v Speaker 2>I was reading this book and it was a kid

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<v Speaker 2>that went to a private prep school in England. And

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<v Speaker 2>one of the weird things that happened at this horrible school,

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<v Speaker 2>in addition to the bullying and sexual abuse, was the

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<v Speaker 2>headmaster's wife would make two of the kids be a

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<v Speaker 2>foot stool for her in the evening so she could

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<v Speaker 2>rest her feet on top of them. And this was

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<v Speaker 2>an elite, yeah, private where you sent your rich family,

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<v Speaker 2>and you send your rich kids because you want them

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<v Speaker 2>to be also, you know, movers and shakers in England. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>really amazing. But and it reminded me I'd heard it

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<v Speaker 2>in a podcast last year. I wish I could dig

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<v Speaker 2>it up. I got to try to figure out where

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<v Speaker 2>it was. Some war in the Middle East way back

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<v Speaker 2>in the day, and like some sultan you know, takes

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<v Speaker 2>over another piece of land there in the Middle East

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<v Speaker 2>and makes that king be his footstool for like the

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<v Speaker 2>rest of his life, be a human footstool for like

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<v Speaker 2>twenty years or something like that.

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<v Speaker 1>I just don't know if I'd go along. I think

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<v Speaker 1>I might. I might, I might check out.

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<v Speaker 2>Before I'd be somebody's footstool for the rest of my life.

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<v Speaker 1>I think that would. Yeah, it'd be tough on your

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<v Speaker 1>back and your knees. I mean, if it had her execution.

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<v Speaker 2>I wasn't thinking about it physically as much as just

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<v Speaker 2>it's kind of demeaning, isn't it.

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<v Speaker 1>What are you I woke up demeans this morning? I've

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<v Speaker 1>done worse.

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<v Speaker 2>What kind of life is that being someone's footstool. Well,

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<v Speaker 2>it's demeaning, yeah, But if it's that or execution the guy.

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<v Speaker 2>The guy's not sitting all day and all night you

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<v Speaker 2>get time off.

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<v Speaker 1>You have no self respect I'd rather be alive.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm not sure I would.

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<v Speaker 1>I could write poetry in my head as I sat

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<v Speaker 1>there with his feet on my back. I could think

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<v Speaker 1>about anything I wanted. I could write songs. I could

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<v Speaker 1>have a happy and productive life when I'm not being

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<v Speaker 1>in footstool. I don't know. You live and you endure,

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<v Speaker 1>you overcome.

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<v Speaker 3>I have so many questions, like if on your downtime,

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<v Speaker 3>when you're not a footstool, how.

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<v Speaker 2>Much freedom do you have?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah?

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<v Speaker 2>Do I have a car?

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<v Speaker 3>Can I go about my regular day, but make sure

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<v Speaker 3>i'm back for footstool hour or whatever?

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<v Speaker 2>Seeing the get You're down at the mall shopping and

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<v Speaker 2>they just text you and my feet are a little

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<v Speaker 2>on the ground. If you know what I'm saying, I'm

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<v Speaker 2>on my way home.

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<v Speaker 3>We've been walking a lot. Twenty minute warning. I could

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<v Speaker 3>deal I mean, I could deal with that.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I mean it is demeaning, but yeah, as long

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<v Speaker 1>as it's fairly civil. Something tells me in the ancient

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<v Speaker 1>Middle East it wasn't quite that enlightened.

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<v Speaker 2>Probably not.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah you get a beating on the way in and

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<v Speaker 1>one on the way out, well, then yeah, I'd hurtl

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<v Speaker 1>myself off the castle wall or onto a sword or something.

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<v Speaker 1>But the fact that the guy hung in there for

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<v Speaker 1>twenty years says to me, you know, it's all right.

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<v Speaker 2>You know that's a that's a decent comment right there.

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<v Speaker 2>That great benefits. You're off hours, hit a creep, got

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<v Speaker 2>a four wooden k.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, yeah, and I'm traded very well. Yeah, it's dirty

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<v Speaker 1>feet around my back. Other than that, it's pretty enlightened.

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<v Speaker 1>He's got great taste in music, and I get to

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<v Speaker 1>listen to it. Obviously, I'm there.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm furniture for a rich guy. But every now and

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<v Speaker 2>then he clips his toenails, you.

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<v Speaker 1>Know, and you know the harem girls. I'm not supposed

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<v Speaker 1>to look, but I'd grab a glance. I mean, he's

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<v Speaker 1>not looking at me. It's it's fine. Beat's getting your

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<v Speaker 1>head sawed off anyway. So my reference to getting wasted

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<v Speaker 1>on juice box is a ten year old California girl

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<v Speaker 1>is set to graduate from college this spring. She says,

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<v Speaker 1>I just enjoy learning. There's so many interesting things out there,

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<v Speaker 1>which is true.

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<v Speaker 2>Ten. Is this the youngbe eleven at the ceremony? Is

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<v Speaker 2>this the youngest ever?

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<v Speaker 1>I don't know.

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<v Speaker 2>I've heard, you know, we've all heard the sixteens, fifteen thirteen.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't think I've ever heard of ten.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah. She learned how to read at two years old

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<v Speaker 1>and began doing algebra at the age of five. Started

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<v Speaker 1>taking classes at a community college in Ukaypa, California, when

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<v Speaker 1>she was eight. It's very fun to me, she says.

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<v Speaker 1>It's almost as fun as playing outside or riding a

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<v Speaker 1>bike or doing whatever. I just enjoy learning. There's so

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<v Speaker 1>many interesting things out there, you know, it's it's funny people.

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<v Speaker 1>Uh no, I don't think so. Let me let me

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<v Speaker 1>say probably not. I mean she's a child. Oh there,

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<v Speaker 1>she is, lovely gal, Oh what a cutie. Anyway, she's

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<v Speaker 1>not gonna end up a human footstool. People react with

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<v Speaker 1>incredulity and wonder and amazement at this sort of thing.

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<v Speaker 1>And I've for years and years and you just thought

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<v Speaker 1>it's so silly. And it reminds me of one thing

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<v Speaker 1>I hate, Katie. That's very odd. I hate when people

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<v Speaker 1>gush over a child who can sing like an adult.

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<v Speaker 2>That is something that sets Joe off, Katie out of

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<v Speaker 2>you didn't know that.

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<v Speaker 1>Well. People are like, oh my god, she's amazing. Listen

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<v Speaker 1>to that voice. Oh my god, and she's only a child.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh my god, it's like this little girl. It's not

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<v Speaker 1>merit that she's that intelligent. I mean she has a

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<v Speaker 1>fair amount of character and a curious mind, which I

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<v Speaker 1>think is great. She's not better than you. Her brain

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<v Speaker 1>just works differently. It's like being exceptionally tall. I don't

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<v Speaker 1>point at somebody who's very tall and say, oh my god,

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<v Speaker 1>he's six foot five. That's much taller than average people.

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<v Speaker 1>Because sand a certain number of people fall outside the

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<v Speaker 1>averages and stuff like that. So some kid's throat is

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<v Speaker 1>formed in a way that she sounds somewhat like an

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<v Speaker 1>adult when she sings. Who cares you know what she's

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<v Speaker 1>gonna sound like when she is an adult, like a

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<v Speaker 1>sing an adult. It's not like she got anywhere worth getting.

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<v Speaker 1>She's just there earlier. It's not like she's going to

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<v Speaker 1>continue to be so much better a singer than the

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<v Speaker 1>rest of humanity by the time she's an adult. Her

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<v Speaker 1>her voice can some of the angels and care cancer.

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<v Speaker 1>That's not the way it works. I have never heard

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<v Speaker 1>someone this upset about Oh I'm implementing get upset. I'm

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<v Speaker 1>upset about stupid people who gush about someone who can

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<v Speaker 1>sing like an adult at age twelve.

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<v Speaker 2>Honest to god, if my kids started reading really well

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<v Speaker 2>at age two and everything, I'd think, WHOA, we have

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<v Speaker 2>got a situation to manage. Yeah, I wouldn't. I wouldn't.

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<v Speaker 2>I mean, if I could choose it or not, I'd

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<v Speaker 2>choose not. I'd rather have a kid of normal intelligence.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I don't know's It's definitely a challenge and an opportunity. Now,

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<v Speaker 1>unlike the singing youngster, this young lady might continue to

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<v Speaker 1>learn throughout her lifetime and achieve great things.

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<v Speaker 2>I certainly hope that for or only fans.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, a lot of super geniuses don't end up happy.

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<v Speaker 2>So oh yeah, go ahead.

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<v Speaker 3>No, No, I was just gonna say a crack a dumb joke,

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<v Speaker 3>so continue.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh I'm sorry I missed it. Yeah. I've known more

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<v Speaker 1>than one person who is of like a crazy intelligence

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<v Speaker 1>that can't get their act together and or their borderline,

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<v Speaker 1>or actually just mentally ill and fantastically intelligent. It's just

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<v Speaker 1>as we've said for a long time, genius is another

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<v Speaker 1>brand of my brain. Doesn't work like other people's brains,

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<v Speaker 1>and sometimes it can be great, but not always.

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<v Speaker 2>Uh. I meant I wouldn't not from a parenting standpoint

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<v Speaker 2>for my kid, I wouldn't choose them to have that

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<v Speaker 2>brain just because. Okay, so now you're at community college

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<v Speaker 2>and you're eight. That's not a comfortable situation. Now and

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<v Speaker 2>you're at college at ten, you're not going to have

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<v Speaker 2>the college experience that you'd have with an average intelligence

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<v Speaker 2>that is, and having a high school experience, none of it.

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<v Speaker 1>It's just and so I actually know somebody. I'm going

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<v Speaker 1>to be very very vague about this for obvious reasons,

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<v Speaker 1>but mom is exceptionally bright and her daughter is off

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<v Speaker 1>the charts, and it's tough sometimes for the kid to

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<v Speaker 1>relate to kids her age. Sure she has nothing to

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<v Speaker 1>say to them. Well, I don't want to go any

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<v Speaker 1>further than that, because I'm not like intimately in their lives.

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<v Speaker 1>But I'm reminded of a great line from the best

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<v Speaker 1>incarnation of Sherlock Holmes that's ever existed, the Benedict Cumberbatch

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<v Speaker 1>with Mark what's his who's Mycroft homes? But that's Sherlock

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<v Speaker 1>homes smarter older brother who says to Sherlock, you think

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<v Speaker 1>it's difficult for you, For me, it's like living in

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<v Speaker 1>a world of goldfish, which is you know, obviously a

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<v Speaker 1>tad demeaning sort of fellow who might use you as

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<v Speaker 1>a stool school. But yeah, to be that bright as

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<v Speaker 1>a child, maybe you're still into playing with Dolly's and

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<v Speaker 1>think puppies are cute and stuff like that and want

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<v Speaker 1>to draw rainbows. But it'd be tough.

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<v Speaker 2>And uh, what is a kid going to major in?

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<v Speaker 2>Do we know that?

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<v Speaker 1>I don't know. But her dream is to someday work

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<v Speaker 1>in artificial intelligence. She's talking about building a startup with

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<v Speaker 1>her dad, which is sweet.

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<v Speaker 3>Cool.

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<v Speaker 2>We're all going to be her footstool someday. I'd be

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<v Speaker 2>happy to be a hunter. Indeed.

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<v Speaker 1>Now I'm going to grunt a little as I get

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<v Speaker 1>to the ground as an old older fellow. But let's

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<v Speaker 1>get this started. Imagine being a singing human footstool, not

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<v Speaker 1>only letting them put your feet on their back, sing

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<v Speaker 1>me a song, footstool. Yeah, I could see that being

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<v Speaker 1>part of the deal. I mean, if you're a human footstool,

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<v Speaker 1>you're not going to say no, I don't want to sing. No,

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<v Speaker 1>I'd say you're a human footstool. You're gonna do what

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<v Speaker 1>you're told.

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<v Speaker 2>Everybody cut everybody cut foot loose now, don't sing foot

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<v Speaker 2>related songs. I want other stuff.

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<v Speaker 1>I am going to kick you if you make another

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<v Speaker 1>joke like that footstool.

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<v Speaker 2>Well, I guess that's it.