Speaker 1: How was your Fourth of July holiday?
Speaker 2: Wow?
Speaker 1: Mine was a rollercoaster.
Speaker 2: So I went through a really traumatic loss of my mother,
Speaker 2: and it was right after I was revisiting my horrible divorce,
Speaker 2: and yes, then I went through a breakup. It was
Speaker 2: something that I kept to myself. It was something that
Speaker 2: I mourned on my own, and I did therapy and
Speaker 2: I did the work, and I just didn't feel like
Speaker 2: it needed to be shared. It was a breakup that
Speaker 2: I wanted to process alone, privately, and I didn't feel
Speaker 2: that I owed anybody any explanation. And the breakup was
Speaker 2: something that I initiated. I wasn't happy, something needed to change.
Speaker 2: It was certainly mutual. The relationship had its challenges, and
Speaker 2: nobody dumped anybody, but I went through it. I was
Speaker 2: scared because of my past and my abandonment issues. I
Speaker 2: get very scared when there's any sort of change in
Speaker 2: someone you depend on and someone that you love.
Speaker 1: But I knew that it was ultimately.
Speaker 2: The right thing, and I really made peace with it,
Speaker 2: and I was happy. I was thriving and I was surviving.
Speaker 2: I was looking good, feeling good. I was in therapy.
Speaker 2: I wasn't medicating with men I wasn't distracting. I was
Speaker 2: comfortable being alone. I was in a place that I
Speaker 2: had decided I wanted to be, and I was happy
Speaker 2: and strong, enjoying the summer.
Speaker 1: With my daughter.
Speaker 2: And then I get hit with an onslaught of articles. Now,
Speaker 2: let me review when we first broke up. There was
Speaker 2: an article saying that my act was publicly making out
Speaker 2: with a woman, and that's how people assumed that we
Speaker 2: broke up. I didn't clarify anything. I wasn't even upset.
Speaker 2: I just was dealing with my own issues and that
Speaker 2: was a blip on the radar. It was not good
Speaker 2: judgment based on the fact that I'm a public person,
Speaker 2: but I was really focusing on myself. And then last
Speaker 2: week I started to see my name in headlines being
Speaker 2: portrayed as the jilted X who had been upgraded from
Speaker 2: that my ex had moved on from me with a
Speaker 2: younger woman, and that it regurgitated the continuous narrative that
Speaker 2: he is a very under the radar person who had
Speaker 2: now gotten serious to someone, had a girlfriend, met her family,
Speaker 2: met her kids, she had met his kids. He was
Speaker 2: in a serious relationship. He had bought her present, and
Speaker 2: they were a new unit, and the media presented me
Speaker 2: as some sort of spinster that's just home crying, suffering
Speaker 2: a breakup and watching this new transition, when in fact
Speaker 2: I was really happy. I was really happy. But when
Speaker 2: you get hit with headlines that are explaining the details
Speaker 2: of a new relationship in quotes that have been placed
Speaker 2: by people, you know, when it's basically saying, you know,
Speaker 2: Paul's a very under the radar guy. That indicates that
Speaker 2: I'm an over the radar girl and that he couldn't
Speaker 2: handle the relationship, when, like I said, the breakup was
Speaker 2: initiated by me. It was mutual, and I was upset
Speaker 2: by it and scared about it towards the end and
Speaker 2: on sure, but it's something that I ultimately was happy about.
Speaker 2: It wasn't a relationship I wanted to be in, and
Speaker 2: it wasn't a person that I wanted to be with anymore.
Speaker 2: To be honest, for many reasons that I really had
Speaker 2: to come to terms with. And everyone has experienced and
Speaker 2: breaking up with someone and then hearing about them with
Speaker 2: someone else.
Speaker 1: We've all been there. Now times that by one hundred.
Speaker 2: Because you're reading it all day every day in articles,
Speaker 2: people are messaging you people are asking you for You're okay,
Speaker 2: You're going through a breakup again.
Speaker 1: Now.
Speaker 2: Read quotes from people directly saying Paul moved on from
Speaker 2: Bethany very quickly. He's met her family, he's met her kids,
Speaker 2: she's met his kids. They had sex all weekend. They
Speaker 2: committed to each other on the first date. Like it
Speaker 2: was endless. It was insane. It's like you're inside someone
Speaker 2: else's relationship and you didn't ask for any of this,
Speaker 2: and this woman is talking about this very publicly, so
Speaker 2: she's sharing all of the details of their brand new
Speaker 2: relationship that has been happening for six weeks, right after
Speaker 2: a six year relationship. And I will never get to
Speaker 2: the details of our breakup, but it certainly was shocking.
Speaker 2: It was definitely shocking, and it's embarrassing hearing about your
Speaker 2: ex fiance committing to another woman shortly thereafter on their
Speaker 2: first date, and then being inside their relationship, hearing about
Speaker 2: their sex and their gifts and meeting each other's kids.
Speaker 1: And the level of commitment was gutting. It was brutal.
Speaker 2: The one thing that was difficult was constantly reading the
Speaker 2: headline that my ex is under the radar, making him
Speaker 2: the hero and me the villain. Isn't the woman always
Speaker 2: the villain, the spinster, the old maid, the one upgraded
Speaker 2: from the crazy one in this case, the one who
Speaker 2: must be over the radar, when ironically I was the
Speaker 2: one who was very much under the radar. And I
Speaker 2: just want to say that I'm okay. I mean it
Speaker 2: was rough because I had to experience the same breakup twice,
Speaker 2: but way worse the second time because I had to
Speaker 2: hear about all these details. And you know, I do
Speaker 2: let the truth get in the way of a good story.
Speaker 2: I am in therapy, I am working on myself. I
Speaker 2: am confident, I am single, I am independent, I am happy,
Speaker 2: and I will survive this. The only thing I'll leave
Speaker 2: you with is as a woman, I think we have
Speaker 2: to think about the other woman in any situation. So
Speaker 2: if you're the new woman in a relationship, I think
Speaker 2: you have to tread lightly and be cautious about whoever
Speaker 2: the woman before you was, because we've all been in
Speaker 2: both positions, and I think by sharing all the details
Speaker 2: of your new relationship, you're disrespecting the last relationship. And
Speaker 2: I learned a lot during this experience. I'm sure this
Speaker 2: woman has learned a lot. I didn't take the bait.
Speaker 2: I stayed quiet. I just let it play out. And
Speaker 2: it was really, really rough, and I'm proud of myself
Speaker 2: and I'm proud of the way that I handled it.
Speaker 2: And I think this woman has learned a lot too.
Speaker 2: And I think that everybody lost in this situation because
Speaker 2: their actions cost them their relationship, which was brand new,
Speaker 2: and who knows what would have happened. Incidentally, I have
Speaker 2: messaged with Olivia Culpo. I reached out to her before
Speaker 2: this media spectacle got out of hand, and she responded
Speaker 2: to me, which is sweet because she just got married,
Speaker 2: and she was really nice and said she's a fan
Speaker 2: and she has all my books and she really looks
Speaker 2: up to me, and that was really kind and it
Speaker 2: was actually a nice, warm blanket during this whole crazy thing.
Speaker 2: So maybe she'll come on the podcast. Congratulations Olivia. I
Speaker 2: hope you have a beautiful, beautiful life with your new husband.
Speaker 2: So I hope you had a better week than I did.
Speaker 2: I hope there's something you can take away from this.
Speaker 2: But I love you all. I'm good, I'm happy, and
Speaker 2: I'm single. Who knows, maybe at some point I'll be
Speaker 2: ready to start dating again. Well, I guess life actually
Speaker 2: is a cabaret. So I went to a party this weekend.
Speaker 2: I've been in my social era and this guy, Jason Weinberg,
Speaker 2: had a party at Moby's in the Hamptons.
Speaker 1: He's a big time manager.
Speaker 2: And it's like the ghosts of Christmas past this party.
Speaker 1: It's insane.
Speaker 2: You see people that you've known your whole life, and
Speaker 2: everybody sees it this way, meaning my first publicist, the
Speaker 2: woman who owns Say Beauty, John Hamm, Neil Patrick Harris,
Speaker 2: Kelly Ripbaugh, one of the house great from Jersey, Leah Michelle,
Speaker 2: Ralph Macchio. Like it's literally like a fever dream or
Speaker 2: like a bizarre movie that you it's it's so crazy,
Speaker 2: you see, I could name twenty other people that I saw,
Speaker 2: Steve Madden.
Speaker 1: A girl who was at my wedding, like just so many.
Speaker 2: Jill Martin was there, John and Lizzie Tish were there,
Speaker 2: endless people that you're just like, wait a second. So anyway,
Speaker 2: I bring Brinn because the people have their kids too.
Speaker 2: And out of the corner of my eye, I see Luene,
Speaker 2: I see the hat. I see Luanne. I said to
Speaker 2: Brynd Lawanne's there, and Brinn is a little mischievous, little
Speaker 2: little termite, little little she just is like nibbling on
Speaker 2: a little snack, like in her mind. So she her
Speaker 2: her face goes like devious and she's just like mom
Speaker 2: because she likes she knows that, like Kelly said, I
Speaker 2: was a chef and not a cook and not a chef,
Speaker 2: and like she knows that life is not a cabaret.
Speaker 1: She secretly watches, I think once in a while, like she's.
Speaker 2: Kind of I'm peripherally aware of the stupidity and like
Speaker 2: the feuds, and it's just like a sport for her,
Speaker 2: you know. She likes a little drama, like a little
Speaker 2: local drama. So I say, Luene's there. She's like, come mom,
Speaker 2: you have to go over because she wants to watch.
Speaker 2: She wants to get her popcorn out. She's like, you guys,
Speaker 2: she's a viewer. And I'm just like, I don't want
Speaker 2: to deal with this. And I see my friend Keith
Speaker 2: and Mark, who are friends with her, and they're like
Speaker 2: they're friends of their free years, and they're like, come on,
Speaker 2: this would be amazing. Go be the bigger person. So
Speaker 2: she walks by and Brinn's looking at me and it's
Speaker 2: Keith and Mark and Brann. I'm just like, hey llo Anne.
Speaker 2: And it was instant. And it was my daughter though
Speaker 2: like kids, heal all wounds. My daughter's the one who
Speaker 2: made me reach out to my mother. And because of
Speaker 2: my daughter, did I set a good example and say
Speaker 2: hello to Luanne? And I said, and per my friend Mark,
Speaker 2: He was like, say congratulations. So she'll love that and
Speaker 2: so and we all want validation as creatures. And so
Speaker 2: I say to Brent, I say to her, I say hi,
Speaker 2: congratulations and everything or something like that.
Speaker 1: I mean, while she has like trashed me last week,
Speaker 1: I don't care. It's just funny. That's so.
Speaker 2: How so I've it like it's like you go to
Speaker 2: sleep and you forget and you wake up and nothing happened.
Speaker 1: And so I say congratulations.
Speaker 2: And then I say, Brin, and I do the video
Speaker 2: for you guys on Instagram, like life actually is a cabaret,
Speaker 2: you know, I say, Brin, you know what? Life actually
Speaker 2: is a cabaret And I kind of open it up
Speaker 2: to Lane and we take pictures in the lands, like.
Speaker 1: I need those pictures. I need those pictures. I need
Speaker 1: those pictures.
Speaker 2: I have to send other those pictures today and I
Speaker 2: meant to send them on social media because but she
Speaker 2: we're blocked.
Speaker 1: I'm wocked. I think she's probably blocked too.
Speaker 2: And the bottom line is I know exactly what the
Speaker 2: arguments are about, but they also were within the context
Speaker 2: of that dumpster and I don't care. Like if we
Speaker 2: had met each other not through that vehicle, I can
Speaker 2: guarantee you we would never have been in an argument.
Speaker 1: I don't really argue, you know what I mean, I
Speaker 1: don't have.
Speaker 2: The only people that I've ever had arguments with are
Speaker 2: within the framework of the Housewives for the most part,
Speaker 2: Like there are exceptions, but like you know.
Speaker 1: The people that people publicly.
Speaker 2: Know I have had arguments with, they're all from that
Speaker 2: stupid show that like Dumpster Fire, which by the way,
Speaker 2: confirms what I've always said, like that show is designed
Speaker 2: for people to despise each other. I mean, you can
Speaker 2: say whatever you want, and this is not me. So
Speaker 2: it's like whenever LUN's been like why do you bite
Speaker 2: that hand that feeds you? And it's like why because
Speaker 2: that hand doesn't only feed, that hand also divides and
Speaker 2: while she's made money off of it and success and
Speaker 2: that hand did feed us. That hand also fed us
Speaker 2: by making us hate each other. So it's we're saying
Speaker 2: the same thing, you know. So anyway, the bottom line
Speaker 2: is I don't I don't care. I was happy to
Speaker 2: kind of clean it up. And in life, I do
Speaker 2: like things to be clean. I don't like things to
Speaker 2: be unsettled and to like duck when I see someone,
Speaker 2: I just don't.
Speaker 1: But my daughter, like, heals all wounds. It's the best.
Speaker 2: And being an example for your daughter or your son,
Speaker 2: you know, heals all wounds like you just want to be.
Speaker 1: A better person. You want to leave them.
Speaker 2: You want to leave the world better than you found it,
Speaker 2: and you want your kids to be better than you.
Speaker 2: And I don't want my daughter to like see any
Speaker 2: toxicity like me in a corner because I don't heard
Speaker 2: pattern that behavior. I want her to always be the
Speaker 2: bigger person. I want her to not take the bait,
Speaker 2: and I want her to thrive and survive and.
Speaker 1: Just be happy.
Speaker 2: I don't want her to be all tarnished and toxic.
Speaker 2: So and I left that show because of her, And
Speaker 2: I was happy to see Luanne, and I was happy
Speaker 2: to take the advice and to clean it up.
Speaker 1: And I'm excited.
Speaker 2: That was really that was just positive and yeah, the
Speaker 2: universe is healing, all good. And I guess, at least
Speaker 2: in twenty twenty four, Life is a cabaret who knew