WEBVTT - Love Stories: Tamra And Eddie Judge

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<v Speaker 1>Hey, there're folks. In this episode, we continue our series

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<v Speaker 1>love Stories today our second couple, Camera and Eddie Judge,

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<v Speaker 1>the real housewife and her husband of eleven years, our

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<v Speaker 1>hero to help us, help you. Welcome to the special

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<v Speaker 1>Cuffing season edition of Amy and TJ and Robes. These

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<v Speaker 1>are two folks who married eleven years and some didn't

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<v Speaker 1>think it was going to make it to twelve. They

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<v Speaker 1>were having to deal with rumors very recently if something

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<v Speaker 1>was going on in their marriage.

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<v Speaker 2>Just a couple of weeks ago, Tamar actually felt the

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<v Speaker 2>need to say something, to make a statement because there

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<v Speaker 2>were so many rumors swirling about their impending divorce, which

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<v Speaker 2>is sport for some people, and that's it's sad when

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<v Speaker 2>you're on the receiving end of it. So I'm glad

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<v Speaker 2>she set the record straight. But based on our conversation,

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<v Speaker 2>it's quite the opposite from what the tabloids are trying

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<v Speaker 2>to sell.

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<v Speaker 1>You and I'd like and then we could we you

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<v Speaker 1>and I could take lessons from Tamra Judge to where

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<v Speaker 1>there was something out there floating around. She shut it down,

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<v Speaker 1>and it was funny how she shut it down. She

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<v Speaker 1>just said, get a life. Is there res fine, it

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<v Speaker 1>was that simple, but you could shut it down with

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<v Speaker 1>just those words. So we should listen to her Real

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<v Speaker 1>Housewives of Orange.

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<v Speaker 2>Count Tony and we've gotten to know her and Eddie

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<v Speaker 2>over the past year or so with the iHeart Family

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<v Speaker 2>and hearing that she said get a life. That is

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<v Speaker 2>just so on brand for her and anyone who watches

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<v Speaker 2>obviously Real Housewives knows her. She says exactly what she

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<v Speaker 2>thinks and makes no apologies for it. But it's really

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<v Speaker 2>cool to see her with her husband Eddie of eleven years,

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<v Speaker 2>just interacting with one another. You know, it's one thing

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<v Speaker 2>if I were to have just interviewed them, or if

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<v Speaker 2>you were to have just interviewed them, it might have

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<v Speaker 2>been a little more formal and a little less forthcoming

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<v Speaker 2>in terms of what they were comfortable with talking about.

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<v Speaker 2>But when it's one couple asking another couple, it's kind

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<v Speaker 2>of like the playing field is equal and everyone feels

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<v Speaker 2>comfortable sharing secrets that maybe you wouldn't if you were

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<v Speaker 2>being interviewed by someone.

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<v Speaker 1>And this is a one hundred percent true story about

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<v Speaker 1>these two Tamernetti which who have a huge following. Obviously

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<v Speaker 1>that you were even found out about hanging out with

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<v Speaker 1>the friend of ours yesterday that just mentioning Tamara Judge's name,

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<v Speaker 1>and she just about lost the mind.

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<v Speaker 3>Yes, huge fan, huge fan.

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<v Speaker 1>But when we did, we did. It was our first

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<v Speaker 1>real iHeart event. After we had joined the team and

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<v Speaker 1>announced our podcast. We went out to California. There was

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<v Speaker 1>this big dinner for all the iHeart podcast hosts and

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<v Speaker 1>folks that night we met Tamarnetti. That night, we spent

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<v Speaker 1>more time talking to Tamarorannetti in a corner just us

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<v Speaker 1>hanging out than anybody else. We loved them.

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<v Speaker 2>It was it was great to feel like another couple

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<v Speaker 2>understood what it was like to have their lives splashed

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<v Speaker 2>out in the headlines and in in not real ways

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<v Speaker 2>where you constantly we're dealing with rumors or battling bad headlines.

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<v Speaker 2>And so that was an immediate connection we all had together.

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<v Speaker 2>And the fact that Tamra this is her second marriage,

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<v Speaker 2>so you know, there is camaraderie among folks who have

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<v Speaker 2>have had certain events in their lives bring them together.

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<v Speaker 2>And a lot of times it is sometimes the harder

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<v Speaker 2>ones that you connect with people over, but there are

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<v Speaker 2>shared experiences and a lot of lessons to be learned

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<v Speaker 2>they're ahead of us. They're way ahead of us in

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<v Speaker 2>terms of having a very public marriage be on display

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<v Speaker 2>and then to continue to have that marriage be on

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<v Speaker 2>television or in the headlines by choice. This is what

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<v Speaker 2>she does for a living, this is what he does

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<v Speaker 2>for a living. So part of their public persona and

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<v Speaker 2>their and their couple or their relationship being out there

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<v Speaker 2>for fodder is because that's how they make their living,

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<v Speaker 2>and that's how we make our living, and so that's

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<v Speaker 2>it comes with the territory.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, I did not make my living but have our

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<v Speaker 1>relationship out there as fodder the record.

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<v Speaker 2>By product.

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<v Speaker 1>Sod it.

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<v Speaker 2>I wouldn't choose it. I wouldn't choose that.

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<v Speaker 1>No, But guess what we've been doing here. They are

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<v Speaker 1>a couple number two for us. A couple number one

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<v Speaker 1>was Tristan Ryan Sutter. But we are asking all these

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<v Speaker 1>couples the exact same questions. We have a long list

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<v Speaker 1>that we go through and just get their honest answers

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<v Speaker 1>and responses, and a lot of that information has been

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<v Speaker 1>helpful to us already, and we know a lot of

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<v Speaker 1>you all will find it helpful and you'll be able

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<v Speaker 1>to relate to a lot of us of it as well. So,

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<v Speaker 1>without further ado, give you our conversation with Tamera and Eddie.

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<v Speaker 2>Jet.

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<v Speaker 4>Thanks for having us. This is so exciting. It's been

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<v Speaker 4>like a year since we've we met by each other

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<v Speaker 4>last down in Malibu. Oh, so much has gone on

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<v Speaker 4>down there unfortunately.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh I know. Wow, y'all have been through it. But

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<v Speaker 2>I know you've also made it through so many, so

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<v Speaker 2>many occasions in your eleven years together now married. So

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<v Speaker 2>I'm going to start our first question is I'm going

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<v Speaker 2>to ask each of you this, describe your relationship in

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<v Speaker 2>three works. Eddie, I'll start with you.

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<v Speaker 3>New, fun and refreshing.

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<v Speaker 4>Easy, non controlling, well and always fun.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, they have that word to come all right up next,

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<v Speaker 1>was there immediate chemistry when you first met each other

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<v Speaker 1>all those years ago?

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah, we had like a we kind of have a

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<v Speaker 4>funny story about that. I was married and going through

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<v Speaker 4>We knew we were going to get divorced, but I

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<v Speaker 4>was finishing a season out and part of it was

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<v Speaker 4>is we were short selling our house way back then

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<v Speaker 4>when everybody was short selling their houses, and Eddie lived

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<v Speaker 4>in the neighborhood and a mutual friend of ours took

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<v Speaker 4>me to his house to look at it because he

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<v Speaker 4>thought about renting it. So and this is the house

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<v Speaker 4>we're in today, and so camera guys behind me. My

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<v Speaker 4>friend Marcos is next to me. The door opens, Eddy answers.

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<v Speaker 4>I swear he has no shirt on, but he does,

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<v Speaker 4>and I'm just like our eyes locked, and my friend

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<v Speaker 4>Marcus is like hitting me, like there's cameras behind you.

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<v Speaker 4>There's cameras behind you. And it was like immediate, like

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<v Speaker 4>when you see like the fireworks. Me evidently shirtless or

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<v Speaker 4>he was shirtless, not me, and it was just like

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<v Speaker 4>it was an explosion. It really was.

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<v Speaker 3>It really was love at first sight. I never believed

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<v Speaker 3>in that, but I experienced when I first looked at

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<v Speaker 3>our stars and birds and all this, like I was

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<v Speaker 3>hallucinating on drugs or something, you know, not that I've

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<v Speaker 3>ever but it felt like a cartoon, Like when you

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<v Speaker 3>see that on cartoon, you smash the head you watch love.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm a looney tune guy.

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<v Speaker 4>So that's that's why he likes me.

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<v Speaker 2>We still watch them sometimes, absolutely do all right, who

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<v Speaker 2>made the first moves me?

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<v Speaker 3>I think you? Yeah, yeah I did.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 3>We were celebrating the holidays because this was sometime around

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<v Speaker 3>June that we met, and then I didn't hear from

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<v Speaker 3>her talk to her because I knew she was married

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<v Speaker 3>for about six months. Seven months, holidays hit our friend

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<v Speaker 3>Marcos again Cupid invited me to some of the same

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<v Speaker 3>parties that she was attending, and we just had so

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<v Speaker 3>much chemistry. We kept sitting next to each other and

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<v Speaker 3>you know, talking, and at one point it was kind

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<v Speaker 3>of awkward because I'm having this intimate conversation with her.

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<v Speaker 3>We really locked eyes and connected and her ex now

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<v Speaker 3>husband was standing right behind her, but I didn't care.

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<v Speaker 3>I was just so connected with her.

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah, I literally even though I knew I was getting

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<v Speaker 4>divorced and it wasn't working out in my other marriage,

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<v Speaker 4>Eddie and I had talked and he said, listen, you

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<v Speaker 4>got to figure your shit out. I really like you,

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<v Speaker 4>I really want this to go somewhere, but you got

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<v Speaker 4>to figure your shit out. So it didn't talk for

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<v Speaker 4>a little while, and then I literally left.

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<v Speaker 3>My husband couldn't live without me, and.

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<v Speaker 4>We've been I never dated anybody else. We've been together

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<v Speaker 4>ever since. I might say that's cheating. Yeah, I don't

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<v Speaker 4>give a shit.

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<v Speaker 1>That's one way to put it. Yeah, Oh, did we

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<v Speaker 1>mention we missed you, Temva. Next question, this is always

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<v Speaker 1>a big one in relationships. Who said I love you first?

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<v Speaker 3>I'll let you answer that.

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<v Speaker 4>I don't remember it was me? Was it you? It was, Oh,

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<v Speaker 4>I love you too?

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<v Speaker 1>Years later I love that. How long?

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<v Speaker 2>How long did you all date before you got engaged?

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<v Speaker 2>And then how long was the engagement.

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<v Speaker 4>We dated? I think it was like a year, right,

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<v Speaker 4>and then we got engaged on TV, and then it

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<v Speaker 4>was a couple of years, a little over two years

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<v Speaker 4>before we actually got married. I think we were together

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<v Speaker 4>a little over three years before we walked down the aisle.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, it all felt like it happened so fast, though,

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<v Speaker 3>because being a public figure and being on TV, it

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<v Speaker 3>felt like your world is just going a thousand thousan

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<v Speaker 3>an hour. And it felt like we met, fell in love,

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<v Speaker 3>moved in together, and got married within six months.

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<v Speaker 4>But it was I kicked him into reality TV?

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<v Speaker 3>And what is this show? Now?

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<v Speaker 1>This next question we might seem to know they answered

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<v Speaker 1>based on the chemistry question. You answered did you know

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<v Speaker 1>they were the one? And I asked that, I'll ask

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<v Speaker 1>the next part of it. Did you always were you

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<v Speaker 1>always believers? And there was always a one out there

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<v Speaker 1>for you or did something change with this relationship?

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<v Speaker 3>I would say I didn't know she was the one

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<v Speaker 3>because having many relationships, I always felt like they were

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<v Speaker 3>the one.

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<v Speaker 4>And you know, he's a hopeless romantic.

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<v Speaker 3>I commit one hundred percent to what I do. So

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<v Speaker 3>if if that was defined as the one, because nobody

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<v Speaker 3>really ever defined that as who's the one? And what

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<v Speaker 3>is the one? Mean? Is the one forever? Or is

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<v Speaker 3>the one for the next six months?

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<v Speaker 2>You know?

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<v Speaker 3>But the one that you know, I remember that got

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<v Speaker 3>away never existed because they were always the one, and

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<v Speaker 3>going into this relationship, I honestly didn't think she was

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<v Speaker 3>the one. I mean, she had a hundred kids and

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<v Speaker 3>a terrible X and you know, there was a lot

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<v Speaker 3>of baggage there. And I think you said was the one? Well,

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<v Speaker 3>when we first kissed, Diamn, when we first kissed.

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<v Speaker 4>And oh okay, very early on, yeah, very early on.

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<v Speaker 3>It wasn't too far from the minute I met you

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<v Speaker 3>to the time because you couldn't be the one because

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<v Speaker 3>you were married, right, you know, she's not the one.

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<v Speaker 3>A lot of baggage. I don't know what this TV

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<v Speaker 3>stuff is, and I just went with it and I

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<v Speaker 3>let my heart grow into it. And I discovered I

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<v Speaker 3>think two months after we dated and kissed and spent

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<v Speaker 3>time together that I felt like she is the one.

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<v Speaker 3>She's the one I could spend the rest of my

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<v Speaker 3>life with. And we have so much fun together. We

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<v Speaker 3>have so much in common, and we do so many

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<v Speaker 3>things together, and it really is like having a best

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<v Speaker 3>friend all the time.

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<v Speaker 2>That sounds ideal. What is your age difference and has

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<v Speaker 2>that played a role at all in your relationship?

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<v Speaker 4>So Eddie is five and a half years younger than me,

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<v Speaker 4>and depending on if he's like if we're in the

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<v Speaker 4>same like if we're in the fifties or the forties together,

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<v Speaker 4>like I feel like, oh, no big deal. But now

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<v Speaker 4>we're both in our fifties. So he was in his

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<v Speaker 4>thirties when I met him, and I had just turned

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<v Speaker 4>forty one or two or something like that. And you know,

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<v Speaker 4>there's always an issue like did he want kids? Like

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<v Speaker 4>is this going to work out? Is he going to

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<v Speaker 4>go for somebody younger? But now we're both in our

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<v Speaker 4>fifties and I feel like he's older than me.

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<v Speaker 1>Now, okay, we're five years of art four and a half,

0:12:01.760 --> 0:12:03.840
<v Speaker 1>it's it's five and a half who's older.

0:12:04.120 --> 0:12:04.720
<v Speaker 4>Who's older?

0:12:05.040 --> 0:12:09.080
<v Speaker 2>I'm older and he's in his forties, and I so

0:12:09.240 --> 0:12:12.559
<v Speaker 2>get that camera because, yeah, we're in the same decade,

0:12:13.000 --> 0:12:14.960
<v Speaker 2>because it feels weird when we're in different decades.

0:12:15.000 --> 0:12:16.360
<v Speaker 1>We got several more years of this.

0:12:17.160 --> 0:12:20.000
<v Speaker 4>I just like being in the same decade. I think, like,

0:12:20.080 --> 0:12:22.760
<v Speaker 4>once you hit fifty, it's like, okay, you're just old.

0:12:23.040 --> 0:12:23.959
<v Speaker 2>But when he's like.

0:12:24.280 --> 0:12:27.080
<v Speaker 4>Thirty forty, and I'm like, oh, I don't like this.

0:12:27.559 --> 0:12:29.040
<v Speaker 4>And then when I hit fifty and he was still

0:12:29.040 --> 0:12:31.640
<v Speaker 4>in his forties, I'm like, damn, like you got to

0:12:31.720 --> 0:12:32.199
<v Speaker 4>catch up.

0:12:33.000 --> 0:12:35.720
<v Speaker 3>Well, it seems like every year she adds a year

0:12:35.760 --> 0:12:36.520
<v Speaker 3>to my age.

0:12:36.640 --> 0:12:37.800
<v Speaker 4>I forget how old you are.

0:12:37.920 --> 0:12:40.439
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, close, getting closer in age.

0:12:40.920 --> 0:12:42.079
<v Speaker 4>I'm closing that gap.

0:12:42.360 --> 0:12:42.560
<v Speaker 3>Yeah.

0:12:43.960 --> 0:12:47.360
<v Speaker 1>Next question, dear guys, why did you want to take

0:12:47.400 --> 0:12:50.040
<v Speaker 1>the step of being married. How do you think your

0:12:50.080 --> 0:12:54.520
<v Speaker 1>relationship would be different if you remained a couple but unmarried.

0:12:54.920 --> 0:12:57.960
<v Speaker 4>Wow? I never really thought about not getting married. I

0:12:58.040 --> 0:13:01.360
<v Speaker 4>was always like, you know, I always wanted to be married.

0:13:01.760 --> 0:13:05.040
<v Speaker 4>I obviously I have been divorced twice. I love being married,

0:13:05.080 --> 0:13:10.040
<v Speaker 4>I love having plus having children. I just always wanted

0:13:10.040 --> 0:13:12.280
<v Speaker 4>to be married. I never like now at my age

0:13:13.120 --> 0:13:16.120
<v Speaker 4>if something were to happen between us, I would probably

0:13:16.160 --> 0:13:18.520
<v Speaker 4>never get married again. I would probably just you know,

0:13:18.559 --> 0:13:20.600
<v Speaker 4>if I ever found somebody, it would just be a partner.

0:13:20.679 --> 0:13:23.240
<v Speaker 4>But I don't think I would go that route. But

0:13:23.600 --> 0:13:27.880
<v Speaker 4>you know, we were both fairly young, and we talked

0:13:27.880 --> 0:13:30.600
<v Speaker 4>about having kids and then decided after we got a

0:13:30.679 --> 0:13:32.640
<v Speaker 4>robot baby, he couldn't handle it.

0:13:32.840 --> 0:13:33.640
<v Speaker 3>Oh she killed it.

0:13:33.760 --> 0:13:36.640
<v Speaker 4>She stuffed it in the couch coouch because it wasn't

0:13:36.640 --> 0:13:37.680
<v Speaker 4>a real baby, it was a robot.

0:13:37.720 --> 0:13:39.160
<v Speaker 3>Me in the morning, and then I found out the

0:13:39.200 --> 0:13:42.880
<v Speaker 3>next morning this this robot, Astro is his name, Astro

0:13:43.040 --> 0:13:46.200
<v Speaker 3>was under the couch dead, and I'm like, we're not

0:13:46.240 --> 0:13:46.800
<v Speaker 3>having kids.

0:13:46.840 --> 0:13:47.720
<v Speaker 4>You just lost the house.

0:13:47.800 --> 0:13:54.319
<v Speaker 2>Okay, Well, I mean so it's you guys made the

0:13:54.400 --> 0:13:54.840
<v Speaker 2>right choice.

0:13:54.840 --> 0:13:56.440
<v Speaker 3>Then I think, yes, definitely.

0:13:58.679 --> 0:14:02.360
<v Speaker 2>Did your relationship have the support of your friends and

0:14:02.400 --> 0:14:03.280
<v Speaker 2>your family.

0:14:04.400 --> 0:14:07.079
<v Speaker 4>Yes, yeah, yeah, coming from a relationship that nobody had

0:14:07.120 --> 0:14:11.760
<v Speaker 4>my support. Yeah, they were taking bets at my last

0:14:11.760 --> 0:14:15.240
<v Speaker 4>wedding how long it was going to last. So yeah, no.

0:14:15.400 --> 0:14:18.360
<v Speaker 4>My In fact, my family has said to me, if

0:14:18.400 --> 0:14:21.440
<v Speaker 4>anything were to happen between you guys, if you ever

0:14:21.480 --> 0:14:24.240
<v Speaker 4>got divorced, we're keeping Eddie and we're going to throw

0:14:24.280 --> 0:14:25.520
<v Speaker 4>you out. We're divorcing you.

0:14:27.840 --> 0:14:29.440
<v Speaker 2>That's a good time that you got a good one.

0:14:29.800 --> 0:14:34.480
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, yeah, how would you all know?

0:14:34.600 --> 0:14:39.040
<v Speaker 1>Next question, how would you describe your first year of marriage?

0:14:39.680 --> 0:14:42.800
<v Speaker 4>I don't think it was that easy. Our first year marriage,

0:14:42.800 --> 0:14:46.080
<v Speaker 4>we were also opening up a business together, cut Fitness,

0:14:46.360 --> 0:14:51.000
<v Speaker 4>so adding that putting that together, he started working all

0:14:51.040 --> 0:14:53.240
<v Speaker 4>the time he was gone all the time he had

0:14:53.240 --> 0:14:56.120
<v Speaker 4>he was working at a law firm, family law firm

0:14:56.280 --> 0:14:58.200
<v Speaker 4>and opening up the business at the same time. So

0:14:58.240 --> 0:15:00.760
<v Speaker 4>he I went from like seeing so much of him

0:15:00.760 --> 0:15:02.640
<v Speaker 4>and then we got married and it's like, Okay, where

0:15:02.680 --> 0:15:05.080
<v Speaker 4>are you? Where are you? So you know, I think

0:15:05.080 --> 0:15:07.320
<v Speaker 4>that everybody. I think people would be lying if they

0:15:07.480 --> 0:15:10.440
<v Speaker 4>didn't say they went through growing pains. So we definitely

0:15:10.440 --> 0:15:13.680
<v Speaker 4>had some ups and downs, but nothing horrible.

0:15:14.200 --> 0:15:16.880
<v Speaker 3>All I remember is and I don't know that I

0:15:16.880 --> 0:15:19.760
<v Speaker 3>could do it today, but it's it's like juggling a

0:15:19.880 --> 0:15:23.760
<v Speaker 3>hundred balls in the air. We're filming a reality TV show,

0:15:23.800 --> 0:15:26.600
<v Speaker 3>we're opening up a new business, we're moving in together.

0:15:27.000 --> 0:15:27.960
<v Speaker 4>I have three kids.

0:15:28.040 --> 0:15:30.720
<v Speaker 3>We have three kids, and we're getting a dog. And

0:15:30.760 --> 0:15:32.920
<v Speaker 3>I never wanted a dog in my house because you know,

0:15:33.000 --> 0:15:36.000
<v Speaker 3>they tear up everything. Now I can't live without my dog.

0:15:37.640 --> 0:15:39.680
<v Speaker 3>So it was it was a lot.

0:15:40.320 --> 0:15:43.640
<v Speaker 4>It was possibly more so for me because you know,

0:15:43.680 --> 0:15:47.359
<v Speaker 4>he doesn't have any children, and so bringing three kids

0:15:47.400 --> 0:15:50.120
<v Speaker 4>into which was his house, which always felt weird to

0:15:50.160 --> 0:15:52.920
<v Speaker 4>me because it was his house, and then having to

0:15:53.160 --> 0:15:55.120
<v Speaker 4>like make sure, oh my god, did you know my

0:15:55.200 --> 0:15:56.800
<v Speaker 4>daughter make a mask? Do I have to clean it up?

0:15:56.880 --> 0:15:56.960
<v Speaker 3>Like?

0:15:57.160 --> 0:15:58.520
<v Speaker 4>Did she not clean it up to it? The dishes

0:15:58.560 --> 0:16:01.120
<v Speaker 4>aren't done, like you know, you worry about that. I

0:16:01.160 --> 0:16:04.120
<v Speaker 4>don't want him to ever think like, oh God, because

0:16:04.240 --> 0:16:06.960
<v Speaker 4>we didn't move in like we were dating. I had

0:16:06.960 --> 0:16:09.320
<v Speaker 4>my own house. We didn't really move in until shortly

0:16:09.360 --> 0:16:12.080
<v Speaker 4>before the wedding. Yeah, so it was all kind.

0:16:11.880 --> 0:16:14.680
<v Speaker 3>Of nice and that was part of the reason in

0:16:14.720 --> 0:16:18.320
<v Speaker 3>our discussions about moving in together. We had to you know,

0:16:19.000 --> 0:16:21.920
<v Speaker 3>make it make sense for our kids as well. Can't

0:16:22.000 --> 0:16:25.240
<v Speaker 3>just be living together not married and you know, not

0:16:25.320 --> 0:16:28.160
<v Speaker 3>that there's anything wrong with that, but for us traditionally,

0:16:28.240 --> 0:16:31.800
<v Speaker 3>it made more sense to you know, set up everything

0:16:31.880 --> 0:16:34.200
<v Speaker 3>so it's a comfortable transition for the kids. They had

0:16:34.240 --> 0:16:38.040
<v Speaker 3>a lot of psychological, you know, challenges to deal with. Yeah,

0:16:38.120 --> 0:16:40.560
<v Speaker 3>when that's that's how I got the dog, is because

0:16:40.720 --> 0:16:42.360
<v Speaker 3>my son was moving in and that was going to

0:16:42.400 --> 0:16:44.680
<v Speaker 3>be his dog, and he was. The dog was here

0:16:44.720 --> 0:16:45.800
<v Speaker 3>for about six months before.

0:16:46.040 --> 0:16:48.000
<v Speaker 4>Do you notice how he calls the kids his kids,

0:16:48.760 --> 0:16:51.160
<v Speaker 4>So yeah, he always has.

0:16:52.000 --> 0:16:56.080
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, and we wanted the transition to be as comfortable

0:16:56.200 --> 0:16:59.520
<v Speaker 3>and smooth as possible so that the kids don't, you know,

0:17:00.960 --> 0:17:02.920
<v Speaker 3>go too south on us. Crazy.

0:17:03.160 --> 0:17:05.520
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, well we were working. I mean, it was working

0:17:05.560 --> 0:17:08.240
<v Speaker 4>against us because their father was, you know, feeding in

0:17:08.440 --> 0:17:12.399
<v Speaker 4>terrible stories about me about him, and you know, it

0:17:12.440 --> 0:17:13.480
<v Speaker 4>was a typicult transition.

0:17:14.520 --> 0:17:17.920
<v Speaker 2>The horse is tough, especially public ones. And then yeah, yeah,

0:17:18.560 --> 0:17:22.119
<v Speaker 2>we we know exactly how tough that can be. All right,

0:17:22.240 --> 0:17:24.600
<v Speaker 2>here's a fun one. How often do you have sex?

0:17:25.280 --> 0:17:27.320
<v Speaker 2>And how has that changed over the years.

0:17:28.480 --> 0:17:30.359
<v Speaker 4>Oh my god, we used to have it all the time.

0:17:30.720 --> 0:17:34.280
<v Speaker 3>All started with five hours session when we first met.

0:17:34.440 --> 0:17:39.200
<v Speaker 3>I think we're down to five seconds. It's only eleven years.

0:17:41.440 --> 0:17:41.600
<v Speaker 2>Here.

0:17:42.680 --> 0:17:45.520
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, you know, the good thing about being married is

0:17:45.560 --> 0:17:50.680
<v Speaker 4>you can like look over and go tomorrow, I'm tired. Tomorrow.

0:17:50.720 --> 0:17:51.600
<v Speaker 3>Okay, tomorrow.

0:17:53.840 --> 0:17:58.439
<v Speaker 1>That's a great answer, and that's enough. Thing. A lot

0:17:58.440 --> 0:18:00.119
<v Speaker 1>of people can't see this, but we can see you

0:18:00.119 --> 0:18:02.639
<v Speaker 1>are right now. You all are actually holding hands and

0:18:02.680 --> 0:18:04.840
<v Speaker 1>have been always been sitting it. So that was our

0:18:04.880 --> 0:18:09.760
<v Speaker 1>next question, How important is physical touch in your relationship?

0:18:09.800 --> 0:18:11.760
<v Speaker 1>And yeah, something as simple as holding hands when you're

0:18:11.760 --> 0:18:12.480
<v Speaker 1>walking down the street.

0:18:12.520 --> 0:18:15.560
<v Speaker 3>Do you all do that one hundred percent? I think

0:18:15.600 --> 0:18:18.600
<v Speaker 3>that's mostly driven by me. I'm a very touch of

0:18:18.680 --> 0:18:23.240
<v Speaker 3>hilly kind of person, and she's completely the opposite. She

0:18:23.280 --> 0:18:26.560
<v Speaker 3>hates being touched. She obviously never or and I wouldnt

0:18:26.560 --> 0:18:28.960
<v Speaker 3>say never, but hardly ever gets massages, pictures. She just

0:18:29.040 --> 0:18:33.359
<v Speaker 3>does not like to be touched. So it's one of

0:18:33.359 --> 0:18:37.000
<v Speaker 3>those things like, well can I touch you? Do I

0:18:37.080 --> 0:18:39.600
<v Speaker 3>have permission? I mean I got a mirror certificate.

0:18:39.960 --> 0:18:43.200
<v Speaker 4>A very like cold family where nobody touched, nobody hugged,

0:18:43.560 --> 0:18:47.440
<v Speaker 4>never said I love you. You know my mom will

0:18:47.480 --> 0:18:50.359
<v Speaker 4>still to this day come over and then visit and

0:18:50.520 --> 0:18:51.080
<v Speaker 4>where's mom?

0:18:51.160 --> 0:18:51.320
<v Speaker 3>Oh?

0:18:51.400 --> 0:18:53.960
<v Speaker 4>She just the Irish exit. She just decided to leave.

0:18:54.480 --> 0:18:56.280
<v Speaker 4>No no goodbyes, no goodbyes.

0:18:56.359 --> 0:18:58.840
<v Speaker 3>Oh okay, no, I don't let her go without hugging me.

0:18:59.160 --> 0:18:59.360
<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

0:19:00.200 --> 0:19:02.959
<v Speaker 4>So he's kind of nurtured me in that way where

0:19:03.200 --> 0:19:07.520
<v Speaker 4>like every night we literally fall asleep holding hands every night.

0:19:08.280 --> 0:19:19.360
<v Speaker 2>That is so sweet. I'll take it in the other

0:19:19.440 --> 0:19:23.720
<v Speaker 2>direction and ask how often would you say you two fight.

0:19:25.480 --> 0:19:29.680
<v Speaker 3>Anymore. I mean, we've had our battles. I call him

0:19:29.720 --> 0:19:30.720
<v Speaker 3>growing pains.

0:19:31.960 --> 0:19:35.520
<v Speaker 4>We're not real big fighters. It used to be because

0:19:35.640 --> 0:19:38.440
<v Speaker 4>Eddie kind of holds everything inside. So every six months

0:19:38.440 --> 0:19:42.480
<v Speaker 4>he'd have some big explosion about something, and then that

0:19:42.560 --> 0:19:45.280
<v Speaker 4>kind of just we worked ourselves through it. I think

0:19:45.480 --> 0:19:48.639
<v Speaker 4>in rarely. I would say rarely, I can't even remember

0:19:48.640 --> 0:19:50.040
<v Speaker 4>the last time we got into a fight, and I'm

0:19:50.040 --> 0:19:50.480
<v Speaker 4>not lying.

0:19:51.040 --> 0:19:53.840
<v Speaker 1>Wow, that's awesome. So do you remember? This is the

0:19:53.880 --> 0:19:56.840
<v Speaker 1>next question. What were the things you used to fight about?

0:19:56.960 --> 0:19:58.719
<v Speaker 1>Was there a theme to the fights? Were you having

0:19:58.800 --> 0:19:59.680
<v Speaker 1>the same fight.

0:20:01.960 --> 0:20:07.400
<v Speaker 3>Usually it's stemmed from kids. No, not really. The biggest

0:20:07.400 --> 0:20:11.560
<v Speaker 3>fight we had had was associated with one of the

0:20:11.600 --> 0:20:12.800
<v Speaker 3>cast members on the show.

0:20:13.200 --> 0:20:15.159
<v Speaker 4>And oh yeah, and.

0:20:15.080 --> 0:20:18.240
<v Speaker 3>I hate her with the passion because who she is

0:20:18.440 --> 0:20:21.400
<v Speaker 3>and what she is and what she's and what she's

0:20:21.440 --> 0:20:21.840
<v Speaker 3>done to you.

0:20:22.280 --> 0:20:24.440
<v Speaker 1>Does everybody else know that story? We just don't.

0:20:25.440 --> 0:20:27.320
<v Speaker 4>I think you just know it. I mean everybody. I

0:20:27.359 --> 0:20:29.960
<v Speaker 4>think to let people know that you don't like this person,

0:20:30.240 --> 0:20:33.159
<v Speaker 4>she's just constantly attacking, and it would put me in

0:20:33.200 --> 0:20:40.160
<v Speaker 4>a really weird spot because we work together. So how

0:20:40.160 --> 0:20:42.720
<v Speaker 4>do I you know, I try to bury it all

0:20:42.760 --> 0:20:45.639
<v Speaker 4>and act like it's not happening. So I would invite

0:20:45.680 --> 0:20:48.520
<v Speaker 4>her places and he's like, I don't want to be

0:20:48.560 --> 0:20:52.960
<v Speaker 4>around this woman. And Eddie loves everybody everyone, So when

0:20:53.000 --> 0:20:55.240
<v Speaker 4>he says like he does not want to be around

0:20:55.280 --> 0:20:57.800
<v Speaker 4>this person, like he means it, when's the.

0:20:57.760 --> 0:20:59.160
<v Speaker 2>Last time one of you had to say you were

0:20:59.200 --> 0:21:01.320
<v Speaker 2>sorry to the other? It sounds like it's been a while.

0:21:02.320 --> 0:21:05.000
<v Speaker 4>No, I don't think I don't have I said sorry.

0:21:05.119 --> 0:21:07.440
<v Speaker 3>I have no problem apologizing or her if I say something.

0:21:07.480 --> 0:21:08.560
<v Speaker 4>But what was the last time.

0:21:12.240 --> 0:21:15.560
<v Speaker 3>I don't know, something stupid, like you know, something I

0:21:15.600 --> 0:21:16.800
<v Speaker 3>said or something I did.

0:21:18.000 --> 0:21:20.760
<v Speaker 4>No, you know what, that's not true. You know. I'm

0:21:20.840 --> 0:21:23.919
<v Speaker 4>actually going through therapy right now, and I have been

0:21:23.960 --> 0:21:26.639
<v Speaker 4>for about three months and so many ups and downs.

0:21:26.640 --> 0:21:30.119
<v Speaker 4>I've never taken this journey before, but just going back

0:21:30.200 --> 0:21:33.760
<v Speaker 4>into my marriage to you know, being a young kid,

0:21:33.880 --> 0:21:36.879
<v Speaker 4>my parents divorce and all that stuff. I had said

0:21:36.880 --> 0:21:39.159
<v Speaker 4>to him when I got back from therapy, I was

0:21:39.200 --> 0:21:41.040
<v Speaker 4>crying and crying, cright all the way home and cry

0:21:41.080 --> 0:21:43.760
<v Speaker 4>there and he's like, what's wrong? And I had said

0:21:43.760 --> 0:21:47.119
<v Speaker 4>to him, I said, you are so happy all the time.

0:21:47.520 --> 0:21:49.840
<v Speaker 4>You will sit in your office and laugh and laugh,

0:21:49.920 --> 0:21:52.960
<v Speaker 4>and I feel like I'm not that person. I shut down,

0:21:53.040 --> 0:21:56.800
<v Speaker 4>like I apologize because I felt like I'm not like him,

0:21:56.960 --> 0:21:59.720
<v Speaker 4>like he's just always so loving, and I'm I take

0:21:59.760 --> 0:22:02.399
<v Speaker 4>things in and I get really like stressed out and

0:22:02.800 --> 0:22:04.240
<v Speaker 4>I don't want to be touched and I don't want

0:22:04.240 --> 0:22:07.600
<v Speaker 4>to be talked to, and I apologize for being like that,

0:22:08.960 --> 0:22:11.479
<v Speaker 4>but not over an argument. It was more about like

0:22:11.600 --> 0:22:14.680
<v Speaker 4>what I'm discovering discovering about myself.

0:22:15.560 --> 0:22:18.800
<v Speaker 1>Oh wow, that is interesting. Guys, what is the one thing?

0:22:18.960 --> 0:22:21.119
<v Speaker 1>You all don't fight much? But I am curious and

0:22:21.680 --> 0:22:23.280
<v Speaker 1>a lot of people would be to know what's the

0:22:23.320 --> 0:22:27.080
<v Speaker 1>one thing you know you can do or say to

0:22:27.400 --> 0:22:30.640
<v Speaker 1>stop a fight the end? One's a lot of people

0:22:30.640 --> 0:22:33.360
<v Speaker 1>wou look for advice when you're in the middle. How

0:22:33.400 --> 0:22:34.000
<v Speaker 1>do you just.

0:22:35.640 --> 0:22:35.800
<v Speaker 2>It?

0:22:36.480 --> 0:22:40.720
<v Speaker 3>I don't really know, because we've discovered that our personalities

0:22:40.800 --> 0:22:45.720
<v Speaker 3>are such that she likes to resolve it right now problems,

0:22:45.760 --> 0:22:48.600
<v Speaker 3>whatever problems they are, and I'm completely the opposite. I

0:22:48.640 --> 0:22:51.880
<v Speaker 3>can't solve it right now because I'm going to say

0:22:51.920 --> 0:22:54.119
<v Speaker 3>something that I really regret, or I just don't like

0:22:54.200 --> 0:22:56.600
<v Speaker 3>to be pushed or pushed into a corner because I'm

0:22:56.600 --> 0:22:59.600
<v Speaker 3>going to come out boxing and I'm gonna deckut indvertently,

0:23:00.320 --> 0:23:04.960
<v Speaker 3>and that hit me. That's why just leave me alone

0:23:05.440 --> 0:23:07.840
<v Speaker 3>and give me three weeks to get over it. I'm

0:23:07.840 --> 0:23:10.600
<v Speaker 3>just kidding. Yeah, No, give me a day or two

0:23:10.600 --> 0:23:13.280
<v Speaker 3>to get over it. I'll compose myself and I can

0:23:13.320 --> 0:23:16.200
<v Speaker 3>better communicate. But I can't. I can't be pushed into

0:23:16.280 --> 0:23:18.440
<v Speaker 3>a corner without expecting.

0:23:18.080 --> 0:23:21.040
<v Speaker 4>A fight, and that drives me crazy. I've learned to

0:23:21.040 --> 0:23:23.400
<v Speaker 4>deal with it, like I just want, like, just get

0:23:23.440 --> 0:23:25.800
<v Speaker 4>this over with right, But he'll like just hold a

0:23:25.840 --> 0:23:28.200
<v Speaker 4>grudge and walk in a room and not say anything.

0:23:28.320 --> 0:23:31.440
<v Speaker 4>And I'm like, oh so now, you know, almost fifteen

0:23:31.480 --> 0:23:33.159
<v Speaker 4>years into it, I'm like, oh god, let him be

0:23:33.200 --> 0:23:36.239
<v Speaker 4>a little little boy and I'll let's be over here

0:23:36.280 --> 0:23:37.840
<v Speaker 4>and wait for him to grow up.

0:23:38.359 --> 0:23:40.359
<v Speaker 3>And I just got to go and take some time

0:23:40.359 --> 0:23:42.840
<v Speaker 3>to myself. And that way, I don't, you know, say

0:23:42.880 --> 0:23:52.080
<v Speaker 3>something I regret, like stop being a little I've been

0:23:52.119 --> 0:23:53.320
<v Speaker 3>holding on to that one for ah.

0:23:56.400 --> 0:24:00.200
<v Speaker 2>Oh my god, now are you again? You do like

0:24:00.200 --> 0:24:02.320
<v Speaker 2>you buy buried often? But are you one of those

0:24:02.320 --> 0:24:04.840
<v Speaker 2>couples who says we don't ever go to bed angry.

0:24:05.920 --> 0:24:08.199
<v Speaker 4>I don't like to. I don't like we haven't in

0:24:08.320 --> 0:24:10.760
<v Speaker 4>years that I mean, I can't remember last we have,

0:24:11.000 --> 0:24:13.240
<v Speaker 4>we have we have, and I feel to me like

0:24:13.320 --> 0:24:16.119
<v Speaker 4>that's the worst feeling in the entire world. You can't

0:24:16.119 --> 0:24:19.439
<v Speaker 4>get to good night's slate. Yeah, you know, it's just

0:24:19.720 --> 0:24:22.159
<v Speaker 4>it's something I don't like to do. But yes, we

0:24:22.240 --> 0:24:22.600
<v Speaker 4>have done it.

0:24:22.680 --> 0:24:24.439
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, I don't like to do it either. But you know,

0:24:24.480 --> 0:24:27.320
<v Speaker 3>like I said, sometimes she makes me really upset and

0:24:27.400 --> 0:24:30.600
<v Speaker 3>it'll take me a day to just calm down to

0:24:30.640 --> 0:24:33.040
<v Speaker 3>be able to talk to her like a civilized human.

0:24:33.640 --> 0:24:35.840
<v Speaker 1>Okay, this next question then, is a good turn for

0:24:35.960 --> 0:24:38.919
<v Speaker 1>us all. Eddie, what do you love most about Tamara?

0:24:38.920 --> 0:24:40.840
<v Speaker 1>And Tamara? What do you love most about Eddie?

0:24:41.680 --> 0:24:44.879
<v Speaker 4>For me, it's just Eddie's heart. Yes, he is a

0:24:44.920 --> 0:24:48.000
<v Speaker 4>good looking guy, but it's his heart. He's just he

0:24:48.440 --> 0:24:52.679
<v Speaker 4>loves everybody, everybody, and he's so kind and takes the

0:24:52.720 --> 0:24:55.800
<v Speaker 4>time to talk to everybody, and he's very touchy feely,

0:24:55.920 --> 0:24:59.840
<v Speaker 4>and he's just he's just a good guy. Nothing sh

0:25:00.320 --> 0:25:04.200
<v Speaker 4>about him, nothing unethical, nothing like, just a good person

0:25:04.920 --> 0:25:09.080
<v Speaker 4>and just finds the happiness out of every situation that

0:25:09.119 --> 0:25:12.399
<v Speaker 4>he's in. Now I'm the total opposite, So I'm like,

0:25:12.520 --> 0:25:15.320
<v Speaker 4>I hate everybody. Everybody bugs me.

0:25:16.920 --> 0:25:20.920
<v Speaker 3>I don't want any new friends, so we don't have

0:25:20.960 --> 0:25:21.520
<v Speaker 3>any friends.

0:25:21.600 --> 0:25:25.000
<v Speaker 4>So he is the total opposite and it kind of

0:25:25.080 --> 0:25:27.800
<v Speaker 4>you know, I love seeing that and I love being

0:25:27.840 --> 0:25:31.040
<v Speaker 4>around it and just the positivity it helps me. And

0:25:31.080 --> 0:25:34.840
<v Speaker 4>I've definitely grown like I'm starting to like people. Not everybody,

0:25:34.880 --> 0:25:36.000
<v Speaker 4>but I'm starting to like them.

0:25:36.400 --> 0:25:41.120
<v Speaker 3>Well, you've just erased your harassments of me talking too

0:25:41.200 --> 0:25:43.360
<v Speaker 3>much to people because she gives me a hard time

0:25:43.359 --> 0:25:45.120
<v Speaker 3>all the time. Why do you talk to people so long?

0:25:45.440 --> 0:25:48.160
<v Speaker 3>When we had the gym, you know, I hear out

0:25:48.160 --> 0:25:48.600
<v Speaker 3>my clients.

0:25:48.600 --> 0:25:49.760
<v Speaker 4>Well, you have the gift of gab.

0:25:50.280 --> 0:25:53.840
<v Speaker 3>No, I just like to really, you know, listen to

0:25:53.880 --> 0:25:55.840
<v Speaker 3>what people are saying. And that usually.

0:25:55.720 --> 0:26:00.880
<v Speaker 4>Takes He means people at the grocery store. He means

0:26:00.920 --> 0:26:04.800
<v Speaker 4>people at you know, Target Costco. They can just he

0:26:04.880 --> 0:26:06.680
<v Speaker 4>can get in like he should have been a therapist.

0:26:06.800 --> 0:26:09.160
<v Speaker 3>I don't like chit chat. I don't give a shit

0:26:09.200 --> 0:26:11.800
<v Speaker 3>about the weather. I can see it, But you talk

0:26:12.000 --> 0:26:15.040
<v Speaker 3>to I will talk to anybody who's willing to listen.

0:26:17.200 --> 0:26:19.320
<v Speaker 2>And Eddie, what do you love most about Tamra?

0:26:19.600 --> 0:26:24.919
<v Speaker 3>I like her free spirit. She really it's sort of

0:26:24.960 --> 0:26:27.520
<v Speaker 3>self serving because it makes me feel good to see

0:26:27.520 --> 0:26:30.680
<v Speaker 3>her spread her wings and be herself and create this

0:26:30.800 --> 0:26:34.120
<v Speaker 3>life that she just loves to live. And that's really

0:26:34.240 --> 0:26:39.080
<v Speaker 3>fulfilling to me. So, you know, she has her quirks,

0:26:39.160 --> 0:26:44.000
<v Speaker 3>but overall, she's just a beautiful person that just loves

0:26:44.040 --> 0:26:48.280
<v Speaker 3>to live life. You know, very stressful life being on

0:26:48.320 --> 0:26:51.320
<v Speaker 3>a TV show, especially a reality TV show, but she

0:26:51.400 --> 0:26:54.640
<v Speaker 3>still has a little bit of fun and exciting and

0:26:54.800 --> 0:26:56.600
<v Speaker 3>just I just like to see her spread her wings

0:26:56.640 --> 0:26:59.160
<v Speaker 3>and be herself. I don't. I love that about her.

0:26:59.400 --> 0:27:00.720
<v Speaker 3>She's willing to do anything.

0:27:00.520 --> 0:27:02.040
<v Speaker 4>Well and I love that you don't try to control

0:27:02.080 --> 0:27:05.280
<v Speaker 4>me because I was in a very controlling relationship, very

0:27:05.320 --> 0:27:07.399
<v Speaker 4>controlling like what I could wear, where I could go,

0:27:07.560 --> 0:27:10.640
<v Speaker 4>what I could eat, like everything was controlled. In fact,

0:27:10.720 --> 0:27:14.560
<v Speaker 4>when I you know, my relationship went further along with Eddie,

0:27:14.800 --> 0:27:18.639
<v Speaker 4>I started to feel like he didn't love me because

0:27:18.640 --> 0:27:21.800
<v Speaker 4>he wasn't trying to control me. And I always thought

0:27:21.800 --> 0:27:24.479
<v Speaker 4>that control meant love because I was around it for

0:27:24.520 --> 0:27:27.760
<v Speaker 4>so long and in it so deep, and it wasn't

0:27:27.800 --> 0:27:30.199
<v Speaker 4>like that. I was so used to being you know, oh,

0:27:30.240 --> 0:27:32.000
<v Speaker 4>you can't go there, you can't do that. Why are

0:27:32.040 --> 0:27:34.439
<v Speaker 4>you wearing that? You know? So he just let me

0:27:34.480 --> 0:27:36.760
<v Speaker 4>be who I am.

0:27:37.000 --> 0:27:39.520
<v Speaker 1>Right. Next question, the practical one for couples. How do

0:27:39.560 --> 0:27:42.760
<v Speaker 1>you handle finances? Shared account separate? How do you do

0:27:42.800 --> 0:27:43.080
<v Speaker 1>it all?

0:27:44.000 --> 0:27:49.840
<v Speaker 3>We share everything. I handle the finances. I give her reports,

0:27:49.960 --> 0:27:53.000
<v Speaker 3>I give her updates. I want her to take the

0:27:53.000 --> 0:27:55.159
<v Speaker 3>steerwheels some day, because if I was to get hit

0:27:55.200 --> 0:27:56.800
<v Speaker 3>by a bus, she really doesn't even know how to

0:27:56.840 --> 0:28:01.120
<v Speaker 3>look at the finances. It's just scary. But it's all

0:28:01.200 --> 0:28:04.440
<v Speaker 3>pretty automated. Everything's organized, and if there was anything that

0:28:04.480 --> 0:28:06.399
<v Speaker 3>happen to me, she could hire somebody.

0:28:06.560 --> 0:28:12.000
<v Speaker 4>He's very organized, So it's best that he controls all

0:28:12.080 --> 0:28:14.400
<v Speaker 4>the you know, the bills and all that stuff. And

0:28:14.920 --> 0:28:20.320
<v Speaker 4>I trust you, Right's kidding? Now, I totally trust him,

0:28:20.400 --> 0:28:23.880
<v Speaker 4>and I have access to bank accounts and all that stuff.

0:28:23.920 --> 0:28:26.199
<v Speaker 4>But he does a really good job just investing our

0:28:26.240 --> 0:28:28.639
<v Speaker 4>money and doing all that kind of stuff where I

0:28:28.640 --> 0:28:29.840
<v Speaker 4>would know how to do that.

0:28:29.840 --> 0:28:35.879
<v Speaker 2>That's cool. How about the household chores, cooking, cleaning, kids, dog?

0:28:36.400 --> 0:28:40.360
<v Speaker 2>How do you all split those kind of mundane things

0:28:40.360 --> 0:28:42.680
<v Speaker 2>that can actually end up causing so many problems?

0:28:42.720 --> 0:28:44.520
<v Speaker 4>And really, yeah, Eddie cooks.

0:28:44.840 --> 0:28:45.680
<v Speaker 3>I love to cook.

0:28:45.960 --> 0:28:49.600
<v Speaker 4>He loves to cook, and so he cooks as healthy

0:28:49.600 --> 0:28:55.240
<v Speaker 4>meals all the time. Household chores. I'm kind of a

0:28:55.240 --> 0:28:57.760
<v Speaker 4>little bit of a clean freaks. I'm always picking things up.

0:28:58.280 --> 0:29:02.440
<v Speaker 4>He likes to pile things. This bedside table, there's a

0:29:02.480 --> 0:29:04.920
<v Speaker 4>bunch of shit just piled up, but it's all organized.

0:29:05.000 --> 0:29:08.840
<v Speaker 4>That drives me crazy. I like everything to be clean,

0:29:09.760 --> 0:29:11.200
<v Speaker 4>but I hate doing dishes.

0:29:10.880 --> 0:29:13.680
<v Speaker 3>And that's I don't do dishes.

0:29:13.720 --> 0:29:14.440
<v Speaker 4>He doesn't do dishes.

0:29:14.560 --> 0:29:18.040
<v Speaker 3>Es actually do dishes. Our very first fight had to

0:29:18.080 --> 0:29:21.000
<v Speaker 3>do with dishes. I do dishes a certain way where

0:29:21.080 --> 0:29:24.640
<v Speaker 3>I wash them and then or rinse them off, get

0:29:24.680 --> 0:29:26.600
<v Speaker 3>all the food off, and I put them in the dishwasher.

0:29:27.080 --> 0:29:31.080
<v Speaker 3>She likes to soak them for days and they just days.

0:29:31.280 --> 0:29:34.600
<v Speaker 3>They just sit in the sink, and it drove me insane.

0:29:34.640 --> 0:29:36.800
<v Speaker 4>I just hate doing the dishes. My mom made me

0:29:36.840 --> 0:29:39.040
<v Speaker 4>do the dishes every single night, and it was to me,

0:29:39.080 --> 0:29:41.400
<v Speaker 4>it was just such a chore. Now a lot of

0:29:41.400 --> 0:29:43.240
<v Speaker 4>times we just have Sofia do the dishes.

0:29:43.440 --> 0:29:46.720
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, but should do Sofia should do the dishes for

0:29:46.760 --> 0:29:49.840
<v Speaker 3>Sophia as well, because she just loves to do dishes

0:29:49.840 --> 0:29:53.000
<v Speaker 3>so much. But because of that fight, I do not

0:29:53.120 --> 0:29:55.880
<v Speaker 3>touch the dishes, but I will clean the kitchen. I

0:29:55.920 --> 0:29:58.320
<v Speaker 3>will do everything else. We have a house cleaner that

0:29:58.360 --> 0:30:00.120
<v Speaker 3>comes once a week. She does the heavy mat and

0:30:00.360 --> 0:30:04.120
<v Speaker 3>every other week every the week, I do my own laundry.

0:30:04.320 --> 0:30:06.880
<v Speaker 3>I do my own laundry, just organized that way. I

0:30:07.000 --> 0:30:08.640
<v Speaker 3>like the way I do my laundry.

0:30:09.600 --> 0:30:11.160
<v Speaker 4>Sophia does her own laundry.

0:30:11.680 --> 0:30:14.560
<v Speaker 3>Yeah. The only room in the house that I actually

0:30:14.600 --> 0:30:17.320
<v Speaker 3>have one hundred percent responsibility to clean is the garage.

0:30:17.320 --> 0:30:19.920
<v Speaker 3>And I'm happy with that. I'm just not happy where

0:30:20.120 --> 0:30:23.320
<v Speaker 3>everything that, you know, boxes and trash ends up in

0:30:23.320 --> 0:30:24.200
<v Speaker 3>the freaking garage.

0:30:24.400 --> 0:30:26.560
<v Speaker 4>Lots of Amazon boxes get thrown in the garage.

0:30:28.280 --> 0:30:32.000
<v Speaker 3>So cleaning the cars, gassing the cars, I like taking

0:30:32.040 --> 0:30:36.160
<v Speaker 3>care of that. He puts gas in my car too, services,

0:30:36.320 --> 0:30:39.320
<v Speaker 3>oil services. And the dog. Because the dog is actually

0:30:39.320 --> 0:30:42.120
<v Speaker 3>my dog. I have to pick up for it and

0:30:42.320 --> 0:30:44.720
<v Speaker 3>walk it and feed it and love it.

0:30:45.400 --> 0:30:47.239
<v Speaker 4>We had a dog that passed away and we had

0:30:47.320 --> 0:30:49.440
<v Speaker 4>one year without having a dog, and it was just

0:30:50.440 --> 0:30:51.960
<v Speaker 4>there was like a little bit of a break where

0:30:52.000 --> 0:30:53.480
<v Speaker 4>you didn't have to pick up the dog poop, you

0:30:53.480 --> 0:30:55.600
<v Speaker 4>didn't have to worry about the dog and all that stuff.

0:30:55.640 --> 0:30:58.400
<v Speaker 4>And my daughter had just graduated high school and I'm like,

0:30:58.440 --> 0:31:02.920
<v Speaker 4>we're home free, really no responsibility. And then he wanted

0:31:02.960 --> 0:31:05.680
<v Speaker 4>another dog, So I'm like, okay, your dog, you pick

0:31:05.760 --> 0:31:06.440
<v Speaker 4>up after it.

0:31:08.360 --> 0:31:12.520
<v Speaker 1>A next question for you here, how much time apart

0:31:12.840 --> 0:31:16.160
<v Speaker 1>do you need? How much time do you all spend alone?

0:31:17.440 --> 0:31:18.080
<v Speaker 4>Not much?

0:31:18.200 --> 0:31:21.760
<v Speaker 3>Not much? Yeah, we do. I do cherish the times

0:31:21.800 --> 0:31:25.800
<v Speaker 3>I spend alone, and oh thank you. I get those

0:31:26.440 --> 0:31:32.160
<v Speaker 3>when I ride my bike, or if I drive to

0:31:32.200 --> 0:31:34.880
<v Speaker 3>Big Bird by myself and stay there for a couple

0:31:34.920 --> 0:31:35.520
<v Speaker 3>of days by.

0:31:35.440 --> 0:31:37.720
<v Speaker 4>Myself, which doesn't happen very often.

0:31:37.760 --> 0:31:41.160
<v Speaker 3>It doesn't happen very often, but it is so rewarding.

0:31:41.240 --> 0:31:45.440
<v Speaker 3>Not rewarding, but like relieving to have a little bit

0:31:45.440 --> 0:31:50.120
<v Speaker 3>of self mental time where you got no distractions, no questions, nothing.

0:31:50.760 --> 0:31:52.600
<v Speaker 3>And I say that because before I met my wife,

0:31:52.640 --> 0:31:54.240
<v Speaker 3>I had a lot of that. I had this big

0:31:54.280 --> 0:31:58.040
<v Speaker 3>house by myself and I would no kids, no dogs, nothing,

0:31:58.040 --> 0:32:00.840
<v Speaker 3>I would work all day, long day and come home

0:32:00.880 --> 0:32:03.600
<v Speaker 3>and just I say this all the time. I can't

0:32:03.640 --> 0:32:05.880
<v Speaker 3>walk around naked my own around my own house anymore,

0:32:06.040 --> 0:32:08.160
<v Speaker 3>you know, I used to really enjoy that. There's something

0:32:08.960 --> 0:32:10.040
<v Speaker 3>sure about that, right.

0:32:10.400 --> 0:32:14.640
<v Speaker 4>No, I don't want to walk past a mirror. No

0:32:16.240 --> 0:32:18.840
<v Speaker 4>do we spend a lot of time together now I'm

0:32:18.840 --> 0:32:20.960
<v Speaker 4>going into filming season right now, so it's going to

0:32:21.040 --> 0:32:23.320
<v Speaker 4>take me away a lot, and we travel and stuff

0:32:23.360 --> 0:32:25.040
<v Speaker 4>like that. I think that's the most time that we

0:32:25.080 --> 0:32:28.400
<v Speaker 4>spend a part. We just got back from Big Bear.

0:32:28.520 --> 0:32:30.840
<v Speaker 4>We were there for three days. We have a house there,

0:32:31.280 --> 0:32:33.880
<v Speaker 4>so and there we're you know, together the entire time.

0:32:33.920 --> 0:32:37.160
<v Speaker 4>That's where we relax. But we also have two offices,

0:32:37.400 --> 0:32:39.360
<v Speaker 4>this office and the office next door, which is his.

0:32:40.120 --> 0:32:43.920
<v Speaker 4>And I think you all, like I get that sense

0:32:43.960 --> 0:32:45.920
<v Speaker 4>like I just need some maytime. I'm going to go

0:32:46.000 --> 0:32:48.200
<v Speaker 4>in my office and just kick it, and he usually

0:32:48.240 --> 0:32:51.440
<v Speaker 4>goes in his office. And that's kind of our time apart. Yeah,

0:32:51.440 --> 0:32:53.360
<v Speaker 4>because we both work out of the house for the

0:32:53.360 --> 0:32:53.880
<v Speaker 4>most part.

0:32:54.040 --> 0:32:57.440
<v Speaker 3>We both go to the gym together. Yeah, we do

0:32:58.080 --> 0:32:59.680
<v Speaker 3>most majority of the things to do together.

0:32:59.760 --> 0:33:02.160
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, that's really sweet.

0:33:02.640 --> 0:33:03.160
<v Speaker 1>I love that.

0:33:04.680 --> 0:33:08.520
<v Speaker 2>What for you would be a relationship deal breaker, like an.

0:33:08.520 --> 0:33:13.920
<v Speaker 3>End cheating cheating? Yeah, infidelity, that would be.

0:33:15.040 --> 0:33:17.360
<v Speaker 4>And I think she.

0:33:17.360 --> 0:33:19.760
<v Speaker 3>Can crash the car, she can burn the house down.

0:33:20.200 --> 0:33:23.240
<v Speaker 4>You know, she chased you with a knife and I'm kidding, no,

0:33:23.320 --> 0:33:29.360
<v Speaker 4>it's it's definitely cheating, you know. It's we're so connected

0:33:29.520 --> 0:33:31.560
<v Speaker 4>and if he ever cheated, I just feel like I

0:33:31.600 --> 0:33:34.760
<v Speaker 4>would never be able to get over it. Ever, and

0:33:34.800 --> 0:33:38.680
<v Speaker 4>we don't have children together, so it's always in Emotionally

0:33:38.720 --> 0:33:41.280
<v Speaker 4>it's hard, but it's an easier break when you don't

0:33:41.320 --> 0:33:42.240
<v Speaker 4>have children together.

0:33:43.720 --> 0:33:47.120
<v Speaker 1>Next question here, have you all been to couples therapy?

0:33:47.800 --> 0:33:48.160
<v Speaker 3>No?

0:33:48.160 --> 0:33:51.400
<v Speaker 4>No, no, never, never ever?

0:33:52.480 --> 0:33:54.960
<v Speaker 2>All right? Is what would be one thing if you

0:33:54.960 --> 0:33:57.080
<v Speaker 2>could change about your partner? What would it be?

0:33:58.400 --> 0:33:59.360
<v Speaker 4>How loud he eats?

0:34:00.560 --> 0:34:00.880
<v Speaker 1>Wow?

0:34:01.040 --> 0:34:13.959
<v Speaker 3>How sensitive her ears are? Wow? She has I can't chew,

0:34:14.000 --> 0:34:16.840
<v Speaker 3>I can't, I can't breathe, I can't, I can't.

0:34:16.920 --> 0:34:20.480
<v Speaker 4>I have like sensory issues. It's not just him, it's everybody.

0:34:21.040 --> 0:34:25.239
<v Speaker 4>So like if somebody talks behind me, like I want

0:34:25.239 --> 0:34:26.120
<v Speaker 4>to punch somebody in the.

0:34:26.080 --> 0:34:28.399
<v Speaker 3>Throat, So we have to switch chairs and I'll sit

0:34:28.560 --> 0:34:31.720
<v Speaker 3>next to the loud tables. Yeah, she doesn't go berserk.

0:34:32.320 --> 0:34:32.560
<v Speaker 2>Yeah.

0:34:32.680 --> 0:34:36.399
<v Speaker 4>So like we'll be sitting at dinner at our bar

0:34:36.600 --> 0:34:39.640
<v Speaker 4>top in our kitchen and then he'll turn the music

0:34:39.719 --> 0:34:42.640
<v Speaker 4>on Alexa, play music.

0:34:42.640 --> 0:34:44.359
<v Speaker 3>Play anything to save my life here?

0:34:45.400 --> 0:34:54.560
<v Speaker 4>Yeah?

0:34:54.920 --> 0:34:57.160
<v Speaker 1>Next question here. I know you don't fight much, but

0:34:57.360 --> 0:34:59.920
<v Speaker 1>have you ever in the middle of a heated argument

0:35:00.680 --> 0:35:04.759
<v Speaker 1>threatened to break up, threaten to walk out, or even

0:35:04.800 --> 0:35:06.000
<v Speaker 1>threaten to get divorced?

0:35:06.600 --> 0:35:07.960
<v Speaker 3>Yeah?

0:35:08.280 --> 0:35:12.480
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, Watch when well, that one had to been you,

0:35:12.680 --> 0:35:14.880
<v Speaker 4>because it's not me. I don't do that. I learned

0:35:14.880 --> 0:35:17.960
<v Speaker 4>in my last relationship, like when you start threatening divorce

0:35:18.000 --> 0:35:21.399
<v Speaker 4>all the time, it just becomes like so repetitive. When

0:35:21.440 --> 0:35:23.279
<v Speaker 4>you're fighting, Like we were fighting all the time, I'd

0:35:23.320 --> 0:35:27.400
<v Speaker 4>always say like, oh my god, I just want a divorce.

0:35:27.600 --> 0:35:30.479
<v Speaker 4>And then once you start saying that like it's truly over,

0:35:30.880 --> 0:35:31.720
<v Speaker 4>I think it's over.

0:35:32.840 --> 0:35:35.640
<v Speaker 3>And actually, this is where I give her a lot

0:35:35.640 --> 0:35:38.080
<v Speaker 3>of credit because this is one of the biggest lessons

0:35:38.080 --> 0:35:41.920
<v Speaker 3>I learned from her. In the beginning, when we would

0:35:41.920 --> 0:35:44.799
<v Speaker 3>have big fights, I would say, you know, I'm out,

0:35:44.960 --> 0:35:47.520
<v Speaker 3>I'm doone. I don't want to be in this relationship.

0:35:47.560 --> 0:35:50.319
<v Speaker 3>And she would always pull me back and kind of

0:35:50.719 --> 0:35:53.320
<v Speaker 3>teach me like, no, this is not how it works.

0:35:53.360 --> 0:35:57.239
<v Speaker 3>This is marriage. We worked through it, and prior to

0:35:57.280 --> 0:36:02.080
<v Speaker 3>my wife, particularly growing and I had very little tolerance

0:36:02.120 --> 0:36:05.880
<v Speaker 3>for relationship issues and if there's something happened, I would

0:36:05.960 --> 0:36:07.839
<v Speaker 3>just walk away. I'm like, sorry, I'm out.

0:36:08.000 --> 0:36:09.040
<v Speaker 4>You know, he's a runner.

0:36:09.160 --> 0:36:13.200
<v Speaker 3>I'm a runner. And she's changed that for me, and

0:36:13.280 --> 0:36:16.239
<v Speaker 3>I see the beauty and that and the value and

0:36:16.360 --> 0:36:20.799
<v Speaker 3>that and that fighting are just growing pains that just

0:36:20.840 --> 0:36:24.759
<v Speaker 3>bring you closer together. But fortunately there's so many more

0:36:24.880 --> 0:36:28.719
<v Speaker 3>good times in bad times that the little things that

0:36:28.760 --> 0:36:32.560
<v Speaker 3>we've thought about that that really it helped us grow together.

0:36:33.120 --> 0:36:35.799
<v Speaker 3>It didn't it changed me into you know what, I'm

0:36:35.800 --> 0:36:38.160
<v Speaker 3>not going to say that anymore because I don't mean that,

0:36:38.360 --> 0:36:40.680
<v Speaker 3>and I'm not going to walk away from this relationship.

0:36:40.680 --> 0:36:44.240
<v Speaker 3>I'm gonna fight for this relationship. So she taught me that.

0:36:44.239 --> 0:36:47.560
<v Speaker 2>That's really cool. What's the closest you all ever came

0:36:47.600 --> 0:36:49.600
<v Speaker 2>to breaking up or to calling it quits.

0:36:50.120 --> 0:36:54.720
<v Speaker 3>I don't think we've ever been there, No, I don't.

0:36:56.080 --> 0:36:57.960
<v Speaker 4>I think in the very beginning, the first year that

0:36:58.000 --> 0:37:01.759
<v Speaker 4>we were together, it was just so stressful and so overwhelming.

0:37:02.320 --> 0:37:06.600
<v Speaker 4>My ex was writing me hard and you know, brainwashing

0:37:06.719 --> 0:37:09.879
<v Speaker 4>children and doing all that that it just got and

0:37:09.920 --> 0:37:13.360
<v Speaker 4>doing public stories stories. It was just so such a

0:37:13.360 --> 0:37:17.480
<v Speaker 4>stressful time for us that I mean, I remember one time,

0:37:17.560 --> 0:37:20.239
<v Speaker 4>like you took off, you just left, in the middle

0:37:20.239 --> 0:37:22.160
<v Speaker 4>of a fight. You just left, and I'm like, wouldn't

0:37:22.160 --> 0:37:25.560
<v Speaker 4>pick up his phone, wouldn't return a text message, and

0:37:25.640 --> 0:37:28.120
<v Speaker 4>what's gone for? Yeah, I gone for several hours and

0:37:28.160 --> 0:37:31.200
<v Speaker 4>I'm like, well, this is it, this is it. And

0:37:31.320 --> 0:37:34.680
<v Speaker 4>he came home he just needs time to vent, and

0:37:34.719 --> 0:37:36.879
<v Speaker 4>I wasn't used to that. He just needs to go

0:37:36.960 --> 0:37:40.719
<v Speaker 4>and blow some steam and then, you know, come back

0:37:40.760 --> 0:37:43.080
<v Speaker 4>and then but then he just kind of acts like

0:37:43.080 --> 0:37:46.800
<v Speaker 4>everything's fine. Death that never happened.

0:37:47.800 --> 0:37:48.200
<v Speaker 3>That's you.

0:37:48.600 --> 0:37:49.760
<v Speaker 4>Hey, what do you want for dinner?

0:37:50.239 --> 0:37:50.560
<v Speaker 1>No?

0:37:50.880 --> 0:37:51.279
<v Speaker 3>You do it?

0:37:51.360 --> 0:37:52.120
<v Speaker 4>Yes you do.

0:37:52.160 --> 0:37:54.040
<v Speaker 3>You know. It's another thing I learned from you.

0:37:54.440 --> 0:37:56.560
<v Speaker 1>When we come out and see you all again, we'll

0:37:56.600 --> 0:38:00.680
<v Speaker 1>explain laughing so much, this is you. We don't want

0:38:00.719 --> 0:38:01.640
<v Speaker 1>to talk about us.

0:38:01.560 --> 0:38:06.240
<v Speaker 4>Today, exactly, very familiar.

0:38:08.520 --> 0:38:11.840
<v Speaker 1>Last week got about six or seven eight questions. Your

0:38:11.920 --> 0:38:15.880
<v Speaker 1>last the next one here, what is the sweetest thing Tamera?

0:38:16.040 --> 0:38:18.640
<v Speaker 1>You can remember Eddie doing for you? And the same

0:38:18.719 --> 0:38:19.319
<v Speaker 1>question for you.

0:38:19.400 --> 0:38:21.720
<v Speaker 3>Was the sweetest My gosh.

0:38:21.360 --> 0:38:25.160
<v Speaker 1>Remembery you something a standout thing that you were like, Wow.

0:38:25.840 --> 0:38:29.080
<v Speaker 3>The biggest thing I remember is realizing that she is

0:38:29.120 --> 0:38:33.680
<v Speaker 3>paying attention to what I like, and that was reflective

0:38:33.719 --> 0:38:38.040
<v Speaker 3>in our marriage, our wedding, I should say where at

0:38:38.080 --> 0:38:41.200
<v Speaker 3>the time I was a huge gummy bear lover and

0:38:41.520 --> 0:38:43.759
<v Speaker 3>used to eat gummy bears all the time. So she

0:38:44.320 --> 0:38:47.839
<v Speaker 3>had a five pound gummy bear I've never seen in

0:38:47.840 --> 0:38:49.200
<v Speaker 3>my life, and I in my.

0:38:49.520 --> 0:38:51.880
<v Speaker 4>At our wedding a reception. We had a whole gummy

0:38:51.880 --> 0:38:52.279
<v Speaker 4>bear bar.

0:38:52.520 --> 0:38:55.439
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, it was gummy bears everywhere. And the other part

0:38:55.560 --> 0:38:58.160
<v Speaker 3>is she also knows I'm a big or it used

0:38:58.200 --> 0:39:01.879
<v Speaker 3>to be a big cyclist, road cyclist. And she had

0:39:01.920 --> 0:39:05.840
<v Speaker 3>the decorator hang aid, the florist, the floors, a bicycle,

0:39:05.880 --> 0:39:09.000
<v Speaker 3>a real bicycle road bike upside down with the flowers

0:39:09.040 --> 0:39:12.760
<v Speaker 3>at our reception. So and she even had a custom

0:39:12.880 --> 0:39:16.200
<v Speaker 3>cake make made with the helmet and the cyclis and

0:39:16.239 --> 0:39:19.160
<v Speaker 3>the cycling shoes and the cycling gears. So that really

0:39:19.160 --> 0:39:21.240
<v Speaker 3>felt like, oh my god, she really is paying attention

0:39:21.280 --> 0:39:23.880
<v Speaker 3>to me. She really does care about me, and that

0:39:23.960 --> 0:39:24.920
<v Speaker 3>was that was funny.

0:39:25.640 --> 0:39:29.160
<v Speaker 4>Yeah. I think for him is that like I always

0:39:29.200 --> 0:39:32.239
<v Speaker 4>know every Valentine's Day, I'm going to get i don't know,

0:39:32.360 --> 0:39:38.319
<v Speaker 4>five dozen roses, like some overwhelming amount. Just the fact

0:39:38.360 --> 0:39:40.920
<v Speaker 4>that he really cares about me and takes care of me,

0:39:41.040 --> 0:39:43.799
<v Speaker 4>and like he told me last month, he's like, listen,

0:39:43.840 --> 0:39:45.560
<v Speaker 4>I don't want you to put gas in your car anymore.

0:39:45.560 --> 0:39:48.000
<v Speaker 4>I'm going to do it for you because there's this

0:39:49.320 --> 0:39:51.839
<v Speaker 4>girl is getting kidnapped and things like that. Like he's

0:39:51.920 --> 0:39:54.600
<v Speaker 4>really concerned for my safety all the time.

0:39:54.920 --> 0:39:57.319
<v Speaker 1>Dam it, Eddie I only gave her a three dozen roads.

0:39:59.120 --> 0:40:01.120
<v Speaker 3>I'll send you a link you can get three for twelve.

0:40:01.560 --> 0:40:02.680
<v Speaker 1>Thank you.

0:40:03.719 --> 0:40:05.479
<v Speaker 2>It's sweet when you get so many that you lose

0:40:05.560 --> 0:40:07.480
<v Speaker 2>count when you're trying to count how many there are.

0:40:09.600 --> 0:40:10.239
<v Speaker 1>I love that.

0:40:10.680 --> 0:40:12.840
<v Speaker 3>I just don't want it to backfire. I mean, because

0:40:12.920 --> 0:40:14.560
<v Speaker 3>if I gat her too many, then she's going to

0:40:14.640 --> 0:40:17.920
<v Speaker 3>be pissed because she has to you know, organize put

0:40:18.000 --> 0:40:21.480
<v Speaker 3>on seven basis and like that didn't work.

0:40:22.840 --> 0:40:25.640
<v Speaker 2>What would you say the biggest compromise each of you

0:40:25.719 --> 0:40:29.520
<v Speaker 2>made by choosing to be together or while like to

0:40:29.560 --> 0:40:31.799
<v Speaker 2>make your marriage good, Like if you notice things were

0:40:31.920 --> 0:40:34.040
<v Speaker 2>tough to first year, what would you say the biggest

0:40:34.080 --> 0:40:36.960
<v Speaker 2>compromise was that you made to make it work.

0:40:37.840 --> 0:40:42.920
<v Speaker 4>That's a tough one. I think probably with the children.

0:40:44.520 --> 0:40:50.000
<v Speaker 4>I think that, Yeah, that was probably the toughest thing.

0:40:50.360 --> 0:40:53.600
<v Speaker 4>Is you know, I was going through such a bad

0:40:53.719 --> 0:40:57.160
<v Speaker 4>divorce and he was trying to turn the children against me.

0:40:57.320 --> 0:41:01.399
<v Speaker 4>And when that's happening, when you're in your own household,

0:41:01.560 --> 0:41:03.640
<v Speaker 4>you walk on eggshells around your own children.

0:41:04.800 --> 0:41:05.360
<v Speaker 3>Do you remember that?

0:41:05.560 --> 0:41:08.120
<v Speaker 4>And you don't discipline them maybe the way you should,

0:41:08.160 --> 0:41:11.120
<v Speaker 4>because you know, the father of the children, or trying

0:41:11.160 --> 0:41:14.640
<v Speaker 4>to turn them against you, And I was really really

0:41:14.719 --> 0:41:16.640
<v Speaker 4>letting them get away with a lot of stuff, not

0:41:16.680 --> 0:41:19.880
<v Speaker 4>that they were doing anything bad, but it was always like,

0:41:20.280 --> 0:41:23.200
<v Speaker 4>you know what, you can't let this person do this

0:41:23.280 --> 0:41:26.719
<v Speaker 4>to you and your kids. Like so, I think that

0:41:27.120 --> 0:41:32.360
<v Speaker 4>was probably the biggest just learning how to combine a

0:41:32.400 --> 0:41:37.520
<v Speaker 4>family together, make everybody happy. That was probably the biggest compromise.

0:41:38.560 --> 0:41:41.799
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, and for me, I don't think it was that

0:41:41.920 --> 0:41:46.960
<v Speaker 3>difficult because most of my relationships I've had I think

0:41:47.000 --> 0:41:52.080
<v Speaker 3>I've only had two relationships where the woman was childless,

0:41:52.360 --> 0:41:54.520
<v Speaker 3>but most of the relationships there was, you know, a

0:41:54.560 --> 0:41:56.719
<v Speaker 3>step child involved and I never knew why.

0:41:56.800 --> 0:41:59.280
<v Speaker 4>But prepare you for this match.

0:41:59.160 --> 0:42:03.360
<v Speaker 3>Prepare me for this because I took it as okay,

0:42:03.560 --> 0:42:06.439
<v Speaker 3>I see what's going on. I see what he's doing

0:42:06.480 --> 0:42:09.160
<v Speaker 3>to the children. I see how she's handling it, and

0:42:09.200 --> 0:42:12.280
<v Speaker 3>I have to be able to take a step back

0:42:12.719 --> 0:42:15.759
<v Speaker 3>and not be a father figure, but be a just

0:42:16.000 --> 0:42:21.360
<v Speaker 3>a friend or a person here for the kids, because

0:42:22.360 --> 0:42:24.239
<v Speaker 3>I know generally wants.

0:42:23.960 --> 0:42:26.960
<v Speaker 4>To be the father figure. He really does in his nature,

0:42:27.680 --> 0:42:31.200
<v Speaker 4>but it was were so poisoned against.

0:42:30.920 --> 0:42:34.839
<v Speaker 3>Him, it's hard to be that figure. I just saw

0:42:36.239 --> 0:42:38.879
<v Speaker 3>chaos happening. If I was to try to be a

0:42:38.920 --> 0:42:42.880
<v Speaker 3>father even though their father wasn't being a father. I

0:42:42.960 --> 0:42:47.319
<v Speaker 3>just didn't feel like I could win that battle. So

0:42:47.840 --> 0:42:49.680
<v Speaker 3>it was a big sacrifice for me to just step

0:42:49.719 --> 0:42:53.680
<v Speaker 3>back and watch the train wreck happen. But the kids

0:42:53.719 --> 0:42:57.120
<v Speaker 3>turned out good, and you know, fortunately, it took time

0:42:57.160 --> 0:42:59.480
<v Speaker 3>for them to really realize what they were dealing with.

0:43:00.160 --> 0:43:02.600
<v Speaker 3>And I think we're at a different stage in our

0:43:02.680 --> 0:43:05.320
<v Speaker 3>relationship where the kids are coming around and they're starting

0:43:05.360 --> 0:43:10.080
<v Speaker 3>to realize all the lies and stuff that they learned

0:43:10.080 --> 0:43:12.919
<v Speaker 3>at a young age. They're starting to get it. So

0:43:12.960 --> 0:43:14.440
<v Speaker 3>our relationship is definitely improved.

0:43:14.480 --> 0:43:18.040
<v Speaker 4>They're all older now. Sophia's nineteen. She's the only one left,

0:43:18.239 --> 0:43:22.280
<v Speaker 4>you know, she's only one here, so that's awesome.

0:43:22.400 --> 0:43:24.840
<v Speaker 1>Next question for you, did you have a honeymoon phase?

0:43:25.120 --> 0:43:28.399
<v Speaker 1>How long would you say it lasted? What did it

0:43:28.480 --> 0:43:31.839
<v Speaker 1>evolve into? Which is what phase are you in now?

0:43:32.160 --> 0:43:32.840
<v Speaker 1>Did you catch.

0:43:32.719 --> 0:43:38.960
<v Speaker 4>Oh, we had a really really long honeymoon phase. I

0:43:39.000 --> 0:43:42.680
<v Speaker 4>really do think that and some might say, like we're

0:43:42.760 --> 0:43:45.239
<v Speaker 4>still in the honeymoon phase because we're always together, We're

0:43:45.280 --> 0:43:52.040
<v Speaker 4>always holding hands and things like that. We've always been

0:43:52.080 --> 0:43:58.680
<v Speaker 4>super connected. Are we banging ten times a day? Like

0:43:58.719 --> 0:44:01.960
<v Speaker 4>we used to. No, we're older, we're getting tired.

0:44:03.560 --> 0:44:04.160
<v Speaker 3>It's not me.

0:44:05.239 --> 0:44:10.680
<v Speaker 4>I'm tired. I'm sorry. Maybe tomorrow, Yeah, tomorrow, I got

0:44:10.760 --> 0:44:14.319
<v Speaker 4>to it tomorrow, all right.

0:44:14.360 --> 0:44:19.000
<v Speaker 2>So final question, everyone always wants to know what the

0:44:19.040 --> 0:44:22.040
<v Speaker 2>secret with the key is. What would you say is

0:44:22.360 --> 0:44:27.120
<v Speaker 2>the reason why you all have not just made it

0:44:27.160 --> 0:44:31.240
<v Speaker 2>for fifteen years, but are joyful and still in love

0:44:31.400 --> 0:44:34.560
<v Speaker 2>and happy together after all these years. What is it?

0:44:35.239 --> 0:44:38.239
<v Speaker 4>I think respect, Like I respect him and he respects me,

0:44:39.080 --> 0:44:42.480
<v Speaker 4>and you know, I don't ever try to stop him

0:44:42.480 --> 0:44:45.920
<v Speaker 4>from doing anything, and he does the same for me.

0:44:48.160 --> 0:44:50.600
<v Speaker 4>He you know, there was a time where he was

0:44:50.640 --> 0:44:54.000
<v Speaker 4>cycling every single day and it's like a big ordeal.

0:44:54.080 --> 0:44:54.719
<v Speaker 4>Did I love it?

0:44:55.040 --> 0:44:55.080
<v Speaker 2>No?

0:44:55.480 --> 0:44:57.400
<v Speaker 4>But I knew that he liked it. I knew that

0:44:57.440 --> 0:45:01.399
<v Speaker 4>it brought him joy. And yeah, I think it has

0:45:01.440 --> 0:45:03.879
<v Speaker 4>to do with respect and being kind to each other.

0:45:05.080 --> 0:45:08.160
<v Speaker 4>I'm not a big fan of like calling names, because

0:45:08.160 --> 0:45:10.440
<v Speaker 4>I feel like those are things that you can't take back,

0:45:11.360 --> 0:45:14.040
<v Speaker 4>and I don't ever want to bring that into this

0:45:14.120 --> 0:45:17.279
<v Speaker 4>relationship because as soon as you start doing that, there's

0:45:17.320 --> 0:45:20.759
<v Speaker 4>no going backwards. Because your words when you're mad, a

0:45:20.760 --> 0:45:24.160
<v Speaker 4>lot of times, it's what you really think, and they

0:45:24.200 --> 0:45:27.600
<v Speaker 4>can be really mean. You know. It's like that inner

0:45:27.680 --> 0:45:30.920
<v Speaker 4>like all my frustrations, like you know, and I just

0:45:31.600 --> 0:45:34.000
<v Speaker 4>I'd rather step away than do anything like you know,

0:45:34.080 --> 0:45:35.800
<v Speaker 4>say something that I can't take back.

0:45:36.320 --> 0:45:40.920
<v Speaker 3>Well, I disagreed, doctor Phil. I think that's why you

0:45:41.040 --> 0:45:43.080
<v Speaker 3>have to take some time away so you don't say

0:45:43.120 --> 0:45:46.799
<v Speaker 3>things you don't mean. That's what I said, so I

0:45:46.880 --> 0:45:49.959
<v Speaker 3>said it under the you know, duress of I don't

0:45:49.960 --> 0:45:52.719
<v Speaker 3>want to talk right now. It doesn't mean I mean

0:45:52.760 --> 0:45:55.839
<v Speaker 3>it calling you an asshole or you know whatever. You know,

0:45:55.920 --> 0:46:00.880
<v Speaker 3>I just you gotta give me time. Personally, My answer

0:46:00.960 --> 0:46:06.080
<v Speaker 3>to that question is it's probably just me. But it's

0:46:07.160 --> 0:46:11.719
<v Speaker 3>doing new things together, even if they're small, like going

0:46:11.760 --> 0:46:15.120
<v Speaker 3>to a new restaurant, going to a new vacation spot.

0:46:16.120 --> 0:46:19.160
<v Speaker 3>Doing for the last three years. For example, we started

0:46:19.200 --> 0:46:22.120
<v Speaker 3>writing Harley's together. We started writing eight years ago. We

0:46:22.120 --> 0:46:25.920
<v Speaker 3>started riding their bikes together. We used to travel to

0:46:26.000 --> 0:46:30.640
<v Speaker 3>new places a lot before COVID. It's just trying new things.

0:46:30.640 --> 0:46:32.680
<v Speaker 3>She's so full of life and adventures.

0:46:33.280 --> 0:46:34.480
<v Speaker 4>We're going to ski this year.

0:46:35.120 --> 0:46:36.279
<v Speaker 3>She's going to ski this year.

0:46:36.440 --> 0:46:37.560
<v Speaker 4>We're going to ski this share.

0:46:37.680 --> 0:46:42.440
<v Speaker 3>I don't want to do that.

0:46:43.000 --> 0:46:45.760
<v Speaker 1>I guess that's exciting next.

0:46:46.280 --> 0:46:50.279
<v Speaker 2>But I think that's such good advice because the respect.

0:46:50.920 --> 0:46:53.799
<v Speaker 2>I so agree with you camera. If you don't have

0:46:53.920 --> 0:46:56.400
<v Speaker 2>respect for someone, and if you lose respect for someone,

0:46:56.480 --> 0:47:01.000
<v Speaker 2>it's over, it's over. And staying young with someone, having

0:47:01.040 --> 0:47:03.760
<v Speaker 2>fun with someone, trying new things with someone, that's creating

0:47:04.600 --> 0:47:07.760
<v Speaker 2>just new connections. I love it. I think that's amazing advice.

0:47:07.880 --> 0:47:12.600
<v Speaker 2>Think you all were so open and candid and real,

0:47:12.719 --> 0:47:16.920
<v Speaker 2>and I know you do reality TV, so yeah, but no,

0:47:17.040 --> 0:47:20.000
<v Speaker 2>it was really it was so awesome to be able

0:47:20.040 --> 0:47:23.440
<v Speaker 2>to hear thank you from and how you got to

0:47:23.440 --> 0:47:25.719
<v Speaker 2>where you are now. We should all be so lucky.

0:47:26.200 --> 0:47:28.359
<v Speaker 4>Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you.

0:47:28.680 --> 0:47:31.720
<v Speaker 1>We are lucky and hope really we'll see you guys

0:47:31.800 --> 0:47:33.799
<v Speaker 1>out there, really, mister you. We had a blast out

0:47:33.800 --> 0:47:34.359
<v Speaker 1>there with you all.

0:47:34.520 --> 0:47:36.160
<v Speaker 3>I know, I know coming out.

0:47:37.480 --> 0:47:40.279
<v Speaker 1>We came in for some coverage. Yeah, how are you

0:47:40.320 --> 0:47:42.840
<v Speaker 1>all doing out there? I mean, everybody good.

0:47:42.960 --> 0:47:45.719
<v Speaker 4>We're about an hour away from LA because we're in

0:47:45.719 --> 0:47:51.480
<v Speaker 4>an Orange County. Lots of people like production people, we

0:47:51.560 --> 0:47:54.359
<v Speaker 4>know they all live in LA. A lot of people

0:47:54.440 --> 0:47:58.960
<v Speaker 4>have lost their houses and it's just so devastating.

0:48:00.120 --> 0:48:02.040
<v Speaker 1>So yeah, we only came out for that. We might

0:48:02.040 --> 0:48:04.960
<v Speaker 1>come out for the Heart Music Awards.

0:48:05.480 --> 0:48:06.719
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, we'll be there.

0:48:08.360 --> 0:48:11.640
<v Speaker 1>That'll be fun. Yeah, the next time. But really, guys,

0:48:11.640 --> 0:48:14.160
<v Speaker 1>you all are absolutely awesome and we're always looking for

0:48:14.200 --> 0:48:15.440
<v Speaker 1>advice ourselves.

0:48:15.480 --> 0:48:18.720
<v Speaker 4>Seriously, I think we all are, honestly.

0:48:19.280 --> 0:48:21.680
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, listening to you guys, we were both like, oh

0:48:21.719 --> 0:48:27.319
<v Speaker 2>my god, oh my god, like it, it's not just us, right, Like, yes,

0:48:27.360 --> 0:48:27.840
<v Speaker 2>that happens.

0:48:27.920 --> 0:48:29.920
<v Speaker 1>Hey, I'm like it, get the fuck out my face.

0:48:30.000 --> 0:48:30.760
<v Speaker 1>I need a minute.

0:48:31.080 --> 0:48:32.080
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, I need a minute.

0:48:32.280 --> 0:48:34.000
<v Speaker 2>I'm like, let's figure this out right now.

0:48:36.440 --> 0:48:38.520
<v Speaker 1>Just please let me, let me have it, can have it.

0:48:40.719 --> 0:48:41.920
<v Speaker 2>I was like, what's happening?

0:48:42.440 --> 0:48:42.640
<v Speaker 1>Why?

0:48:42.920 --> 0:48:44.720
<v Speaker 2>What the hell? I was wise.

0:48:44.880 --> 0:48:49.239
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, it took a lot of fights to get for

0:48:49.320 --> 0:48:51.520
<v Speaker 3>her to understand it, you know, and for me to

0:48:51.760 --> 0:48:55.560
<v Speaker 3>realize some things that, you know, going through the struggles

0:48:55.640 --> 0:49:00.000
<v Speaker 3>of learning each other and getting through each other's habit

0:49:00.360 --> 0:49:01.280
<v Speaker 3>that we formed.

0:49:01.719 --> 0:49:04.520
<v Speaker 4>I call it the only child syndrome. Here we go,

0:49:07.239 --> 0:49:12.200
<v Speaker 4>the only child syndrome. It's all about me. Okay, it's

0:49:12.200 --> 0:49:14.239
<v Speaker 4>all about me.

0:49:16.680 --> 0:49:19.120
<v Speaker 1>It's never a good start to come. Here we go.

0:49:19.880 --> 0:49:24.480
<v Speaker 2>There she goes again.

0:49:25.960 --> 0:49:27.799
<v Speaker 1>It is so good to see you all. This is

0:49:27.920 --> 0:49:32.319
<v Speaker 1>fun having us. No, thank you all so much for

0:49:32.400 --> 0:49:34.280
<v Speaker 1>this and I promise we're going to see you all

0:49:34.280 --> 0:49:36.080
<v Speaker 1>out there in March, all right, We're gonna make sure

0:49:36.080 --> 0:49:36.520
<v Speaker 1>we see y'all.

0:49:36.960 --> 0:49:40.320
<v Speaker 3>Can't wait to hear it. Bye bye, guys,