Speaker 1: Pushkin. If you've ever read the first few books of
Speaker 1: the Hebrew Bible, then you know that there's a lot
Speaker 1: going on. There are sweeping tales of cruelty, slavery, and destruction.
Speaker 1: There are plagues and floods and desert wanderings. And there
Speaker 1: are even smaller domestic stories of bitter sibling rivalries and
Speaker 1: loving reconciliation. People have argued about and debated this text
Speaker 1: for thousands of years. How literally should we take the
Speaker 1: words on the page, how should we apply the text
Speaker 1: to the modern world, and do we really understand its
Speaker 1: true meaning? But there's one instruction from the Torah that
Speaker 1: is crystal clear. Take a day off from the very
Speaker 1: very beginning. When the Torah first describes the making of
Speaker 1: the universe, it clearly explains that the creator took a
Speaker 1: whole day long break from his work. That idea of
Speaker 1: twenty four hours of rest is even included is one
Speaker 1: of the ten commandments. Now, I'm not usually one to
Speaker 1: flo out the commandments, but taking a break from work
Speaker 1: isn't an instruction that I find all that easy to observe,
Speaker 1: and neither did Sarah Hurwitz. She and I both grew
Speaker 1: up sharing a college culture that seemed to almost frown
Speaker 1: upon enjoying downtime. Going to college at a school like Harvard,
Speaker 1: you know, there's almost this like cult of hard cornice
Speaker 1: where it's like how many all nighters do you pull
Speaker 1: and how much work can you do? You know, there
Speaker 1: was a sense that, oh, good, Saturday's more time for work.
Speaker 1: It's so easy to fill every available hour with work.
Speaker 1: I remember like we would kind of look at classmates
Speaker 1: who were kind of laid back and who kind of
Speaker 1: just like enjoyed themselves and be like, oh, that person's
Speaker 1: just they're kind of a partier. Like they're not you know,
Speaker 1: they're not what a loser? Yeah, I mean it was
Speaker 1: like so ridiculous. And by the way, I have to say,
Speaker 1: I think about the guys down the hall for me
Speaker 1: who were like partiers and who kind of you know,
Speaker 1: had a lot of fun and relax and they're all
Speaker 1: like millionaires, Like they found in some company and became
Speaker 1: so wealthy just on my Okay, clearly they were onto something.
Speaker 1: Then after college, I stayed in academia and took a
Speaker 1: job in the Ivy League, which isn't usually known for
Speaker 1: its chill, slacker vibe. But Sarah moved on to an
Speaker 1: even more extreme workplace, one that's famously on twenty four
Speaker 1: to seven the White House. You really have no life,
Speaker 1: right like work. You were just constantly working. You're never
Speaker 1: off right, You're always available. That's kind of the definition
Speaker 1: of a really good political staffer is always available. You know,
Speaker 1: anytime you call email, I will pick up, I will
Speaker 1: answer within seconds. That's what kind of distinguishes a really
Speaker 1: great staffer. And so, you know, there were just times
Speaker 1: when I got exhausted. I was working on Hillary Clinton's
Speaker 1: campaign for president in two thousand and eight, and I
Speaker 1: dropped a glass in my kitchen one night, just when
Speaker 1: I was making dinner, and I just thought like I
Speaker 1: was just like looking at all the shards on the
Speaker 1: floor and just thinking like, oh my gosh, the idea
Speaker 1: of cleaning this up is so exhausting, And so I
Speaker 1: just didn't clean it up for weeks. I would just
Speaker 1: wear flipflops in my kitchen, which is like, that's really extreme, right,
Speaker 1: It's it's just exhausting, and it starts to feel a
Speaker 1: little bit to humanizing, right. You just start to feel
Speaker 1: like you are just kind of plowing for your days
Speaker 1: in this kind of state. Of work. It's not a
Speaker 1: great way to live. You got so few breaks. You
Speaker 1: couldn't even take a break when you were like taking
Speaker 1: a shower, right right, there was There was one time
Speaker 1: when I took my phone into the shower in a
Speaker 1: plastic bag because I was afraid of missing a call.
Speaker 1: This was on a political campaign, and yeah, it was
Speaker 1: a bit much. Now, these sorts of behaviors might sound
Speaker 1: a bit extreme, but many of us struggle to keep
Speaker 1: work from invading our lives, from our meal times, to
Speaker 1: our gym sessions, even to our date nights. The good
Speaker 1: news is that Sarah eventually found a solution to this
Speaker 1: happiness sapping of session with work, and she found that
Speaker 1: solution in Judaism. Welcome back to Happiness Lessons of the
Speaker 1: Ancients with me, Doctor Laurie Santos. As we learned in
Speaker 1: the last episode, Sarah Hurwitz found herself struggling to feel
Speaker 1: happier in her mid thirties and was looking to make
Speaker 1: some changes, so she decided to learn more about Judaism,
Speaker 1: the religious faith she had not given much thought to
Speaker 1: since she was a kid. You can read about it
Speaker 1: in her book here. All along finding meaning, spirituality and
Speaker 1: a deeper connection to life in Judaism after finally choosing
Speaker 1: to look there. One of the biggest revelations Sarah took
Speaker 1: from Judaism was about overfilling her life with work and striving.
Speaker 1: She learned that joy could be found once you start
Speaker 1: questioning that twenty four seven work culture. You know, it's funny,
Speaker 1: I look back to my childhood in the eighties, and
Speaker 1: there was like all this unstructured time. You know. I
Speaker 1: think about the weekends, you know, as a child, and like,
Speaker 1: you know, my dad would take us hiking or bowling
Speaker 1: or fishing, and there was no rushing. We weren't rushing
Speaker 1: to get anywhere. We were just being were just sitting
Speaker 1: there fishing, or we were hiking and looking out, or
Speaker 1: my brother and I were playing outside or going biking.
Speaker 1: Like there was not this of franticness of rush of
Speaker 1: like I have to achieve all of these things. There
Speaker 1: was actually a real break and I think in our
Speaker 1: modern times and also as an adult, I really lost
Speaker 1: that it's so relentless. It is so relentless, and it
Speaker 1: really is fueled by this very consumerist ethic, which is
Speaker 1: like you don't have enough, you are not enough, right,
Speaker 1: That is the core fundamental consumerist ethic is not enough.
Speaker 1: And so what you have to do to alleviate that
Speaker 1: is you have to get stuff, and to get stuff
Speaker 1: you have to work harder. And so you work harder
Speaker 1: so that you can get more stuff, which requires you
Speaker 1: to work harder so that you can get more stuff.
Speaker 1: It's this kind of endless cycle of working and getting
Speaker 1: working and getting and ultimately getting all this stuff. It
Speaker 1: doesn't necessarily make us happier, you know, I'm sure you know, right,
Speaker 1: there is a limit to the minimum income, after which
Speaker 1: point you don't get happier. And it's much lower than
Speaker 1: you would think. Yeah, I mean the research shows, in
Speaker 1: some of the research, it shows it's around seventy five K,
Speaker 1: you know, which is much lower than many people think.
Speaker 1: But we still feel like, you know, if we could
Speaker 1: get more money, get more stuff, just not cease doing whatever,
Speaker 1: we would be happier. But this seems to conflict with
Speaker 1: one of the like earliest passages in the Torah, maybe
Speaker 1: one of the most important, right, and so talk to
Speaker 1: me about you know where Judaism says that this sort
Speaker 1: of approach might not work very well. Yes, so it's
Speaker 1: actually in the Ten Commandments believe it or not, where
Speaker 1: one of the ten commandments is basically to celebrate Shabbat.
Speaker 1: It's to rest on Shabbat, which is generally understood to
Speaker 1: be Friday evening to Saturday evening, about twenty five hours.
Speaker 1: And not only are you supposed to rest, but you
Speaker 1: are the touras says, to let your servants, your animals,
Speaker 1: and the stranger within your midst That's just like if
Speaker 1: someone outside the tribe, like a non Israelite is visiting,
Speaker 1: everyone has to rest. Which is kind of amazing to
Speaker 1: think that, like your animals even after rest, all right,
Speaker 1: Like that's like like really like the cattle rest. But
Speaker 1: I think that, you know, like with much interpretation of
Speaker 1: the Torah, I really look at this much more metaphorically
Speaker 1: of you know, when we are just constantly endlessly working
Speaker 1: and striving and feeling like that not enough, you do
Speaker 1: begin to feel a little like an animal, right, Like
Speaker 1: you're like a workhorse with blinders on, just kind of
Speaker 1: plow in the field. You know, you can you feel
Speaker 1: like a servant. You really feel like you're just serving
Speaker 1: whoever it is you're serving your boss, the almighty dollar
Speaker 1: or whatever, and you can start to feel like a
Speaker 1: stranger in your own life, kind of alienated from yourself,
Speaker 1: and so that wisdom that says, actually stop, like get
Speaker 1: off of this, not enough, need more train and just
Speaker 1: create an entirely different space for those twenty five hours.
Speaker 1: And this is something that like God in the Tora
Speaker 1: actually embodied himself right in the beginning, yes, right, like
Speaker 1: after creating the world over a period of six days,
Speaker 1: God rests, right like God does the first shabat basically
Speaker 1: in the Torah. In the book you mentioned this idea.
Speaker 1: You know, we think of Sabbat as being about rest,
Speaker 1: but the translation isn't exactly rest when you think about it, right,
Speaker 1: You're exactly right. It's not rest. That's a different word.
Speaker 1: Shabat really means stop, cease, pause. So it's kind of
Speaker 1: funny because you know, you could say, well, I think
Speaker 1: it's really RESTful to watch Netflix and you catch up
Speaker 1: on my email and go and spend a lot of
Speaker 1: money at local stores, and like that might actually be
Speaker 1: RESTful for you, but that's not what shabat is. Shabbat
Speaker 1: is actually it's a pause from your weekday life. So
Speaker 1: if you kind of observe shabat in a very very
Speaker 1: traditional way, there are so many rules. I mean, it
Speaker 1: almost seems a little crazy, where it's like, you know,
Speaker 1: you don't use electricity, so you're not you know, you
Speaker 1: can't be on screens. You don't spend money, so you
Speaker 1: can't go out and buy things. So many rules, which
Speaker 1: before I really started understanding shabbat, I looked at it
Speaker 1: and just thought, like I got all these rules, like
Speaker 1: come on, you know what, you can't take the elevator,
Speaker 1: so it's what is it really more RESTful to walk
Speaker 1: up seven flights of stairs? Like that's silly. But I
Speaker 1: now understand that what people who observe shabat in this
Speaker 1: rigorous way are doing is they are basically plugging up
Speaker 1: every nook and cranny through which the secular world, the
Speaker 1: workday world, can see, and they're creating an entirely different space.
Speaker 1: So when I've spent time with Jews who are observing
Speaker 1: shabat and this really rigorous way, it's like time has
Speaker 1: a different texture. Like there are no phones. No one
Speaker 1: is looking at their phone, nothing is buzzing or beeping
Speaker 1: or grinding, Like there's none of that mechanical noise. No
Speaker 1: one is rushing to go anywhere. Right, They're not. They're
Speaker 1: not driving places, they're not rushing to go places. It
Speaker 1: feels different, like it actually like everyone is there, people
Speaker 1: are present, Like when you are you at a Shabat
Speaker 1: meal with people who are really in it. People are
Speaker 1: like actually talking to each other in a super engaged way.
Speaker 1: Kids are just kind of running around playing outside, and
Speaker 1: time feels languid. It kind of just stretches out before you,
Speaker 1: and it's really beautiful. It feels so different from the
Speaker 1: rest of the week. And I think in way, Shabbat
Speaker 1: helps us kind of recapture some of that nineteen eighties
Speaker 1: childhood sense of just this long day stretching ahead of you,
Speaker 1: where there's nothing to achieve, there's nowhere to be, there's
Speaker 1: nothing that has to be done on some schedule. There's
Speaker 1: just a sense of openness of just instead of doing,
Speaker 1: it's being And that is really powerful transition and one
Speaker 1: that I think so many of us just desperately need
Speaker 1: now and it's so hard to do. Do you think
Speaker 1: folks who are really observing Shabbat in that way are
Speaker 1: happier in those moments? I do, I really do. I mean,
Speaker 1: so many Jews who I know who observed Shabat they're like, oh,
Speaker 1: Shabbat saves my life every week, right, Like it just
Speaker 1: gets you off that train of I'm not rich enough,
Speaker 1: thin enough, beautiful enough, this enough, that enough, and you
Speaker 1: just say no, I'm enough, I'm just enough. And I
Speaker 1: think that during the week, you're so often listening to
Speaker 1: so many other people's voices, right your boss, all the
Speaker 1: ads that are barraging you from TV, Facebook and the
Speaker 1: internet whatever, and on Shabbat you actually you literally shut
Speaker 1: all of that off. So like, whose voices are you
Speaker 1: listening to on Shabbat? The voices of people you love
Speaker 1: and your own voice? Like for me, you know, I
Speaker 1: actually tried in the White House for a period of
Speaker 1: months to have a pretty rigorous Shabbat practice, and my
Speaker 1: colleagues were super supportive. They were so wonderful. Like I
Speaker 1: explained to them, like, look, if you it's an emergency,
Speaker 1: you call me, but I'm not checking email. And they
Speaker 1: were like great or so proud of you. And you know,
Speaker 1: when I had this practice, it was like the first
Speaker 1: time I actually had space to just hear my own
Speaker 1: voice and hear my own thoughts rather than constantly thinking like, okay,
Speaker 1: you know what would missus Obama want to say, or
Speaker 1: what do my colleagues need? And I actually think that
Speaker 1: that space was what allowed me to kind of germinate
Speaker 1: and generate this idea for this book on Judaism that
Speaker 1: I want to write. You know, I think that it
Speaker 1: sort of allowed that idea to actually take root and grow.
Speaker 1: And I think so often we just aren't able to
Speaker 1: create space for those things within us, and so things
Speaker 1: don't take root, we don't flourish in a way that
Speaker 1: we really could. So I'm picturing, like, you know, this
Speaker 1: White House staffer who has like decided now that she's
Speaker 1: going to, like, you know, take a few days off
Speaker 1: on the weekend in the middle of a campaign, and
Speaker 1: so talk about what that decision was like when you
Speaker 1: were thinking about it, and how people reacted and things.
Speaker 1: I think it was twenty sixteen, and I was doing
Speaker 1: all this reading about Shabbat and I was like, I'm
Speaker 1: just going to try this out, Like this sounds amazing,
Speaker 1: and you know, I emailed my colleagues and said, Okay,
Speaker 1: I'm going to start doing this. Here's what it means.
Speaker 1: And they were just so supportive, you know, they just
Speaker 1: sent me back these notes saying like, we're not going
Speaker 1: to bother. You good for you, that's so great, and
Speaker 1: and you know what it was, Actually it actually was fine.
Speaker 1: Like we managed, you know, I would just get back
Speaker 1: online Saturday night and do the work. Then it was
Speaker 1: actually okay. But I'll tell you, if I had been
Speaker 1: on a campaign, if I had been in a more
Speaker 1: kind of crazy time, that would have been very hard.
Speaker 1: And the truth is, after a couple months, a few months,
Speaker 1: I was like, it just felt like too much for me.
Speaker 1: But like I like, things were getting really busy and hectic.
Speaker 1: We were traveling a lot, and it actually became hard
Speaker 1: for me to do. Now, if I had felt like, no,
Speaker 1: this is really important to me, like I am an observant, you,
Speaker 1: I would have done it. And this is why I
Speaker 1: actually really admire the way that my friends who are observant,
Speaker 1: who are who are quite religious. You know, for them,
Speaker 1: it's not optional, right, It's not something they can pick
Speaker 1: and choose as they see fit. For them, it is
Speaker 1: like it's mandatory, right, that is part like they feel
Speaker 1: a real sense of being commanded by God to do this.
Speaker 1: So it's not a thing and that works really well, right,
Speaker 1: They just make it work. Whereas for me it was
Speaker 1: optional and when something like this is optional, turns out
Speaker 1: you end up taking the option of not doing it
Speaker 1: so rigorously. We're now going to take a quick break.
Speaker 1: But when we return, Sarah will explain the benefits she's
Speaker 1: seen in observing a day of rest. We'll see how
Speaker 1: all of us, even though it too busy to take
Speaker 1: a whole day off, can introduce some time of pause
Speaker 1: into our lives. The happiness lab will be back in
Speaker 1: a moment. In her book, Sarah Hurwitz describes just how
Speaker 1: much she learned from ditching her round the clockworking habits
Speaker 1: and enjoying a day of rest as instructed in the Torah.
Speaker 1: One of her most interesting insights, one that matches with
Speaker 1: the science, is the fact that enjoying the Sabbath can
Speaker 1: help you reappraise your tendency to be a bit of
Speaker 1: a control freak. You actually don't have control over when
Speaker 1: Shabbat starts, right, It's just like you gotta stop, Like
Speaker 1: if you're in the middle of some intense work project,
Speaker 1: you have to step away, which is kind of amazing, right,
Speaker 1: It's actually, you know, the whole point of Shabbat is
Speaker 1: that in this moment, you stop creating, you stop imposing,
Speaker 1: your will on the world and you actually just feel
Speaker 1: yourself as a creation. Right. I think that's Rabbi Jonathan
Speaker 1: Sachs who of Blessed Memory. He this amazing British rabbi
Speaker 1: who talked about you go from relentless creating to actually
Speaker 1: feeling yourself as a creation. What an interesting thing like
Speaker 1: when you are a creation that's not something you control, Right,
Speaker 1: You're kind of just in a way stopping and just
Speaker 1: saying like, I'm not going to impose my will on
Speaker 1: the world. I'm not going to control everything and manage
Speaker 1: everything and create everything. I'm just going to take a
Speaker 1: break from that for a second. And I think that
Speaker 1: shift in mindset is just so powerful at a moment
Speaker 1: when so many of us feel like we're so frantically
Speaker 1: trying to control everything, change everything, manage everything, because modern
Speaker 1: life is hard and we have very little support in
Speaker 1: this country to care for our families. So how many
Speaker 1: people are struggling right now, and it's it's really heartbreaking
Speaker 1: to see. Another thing you mentioned is a benefit is that,
Speaker 1: like taking a Shabbat can actually help us to sort
Speaker 1: of fight consumerism and materialism, you know, all this stuff.
Speaker 1: On the podcast we talk about people being into but
Speaker 1: it doesn't really positively affect our happiness. Yes, you know,
Speaker 1: it's like to actually have a day we were forced
Speaker 1: to stop spending, Like we were forced to stop getting
Speaker 1: things and striving and trying to be something other than
Speaker 1: you are. Like, it's such a shift in mindset, and
Speaker 1: it actually when you step back into that weekday consumerist mindset,
Speaker 1: you kind of realize it's almost jarring and it's kind
Speaker 1: of depressing, and you're like, wait a second, I don't
Speaker 1: like this feeling of never enough. I don't like this
Speaker 1: feeling of feeling inferior, and like I have to keep
Speaker 1: striving and like something is broken in me that I
Speaker 1: have to keep fixing. Because like, let's be very clear,
Speaker 1: that is the message of every advertisement ever. It's like
Speaker 1: something is wrong with you, Our product or service will
Speaker 1: fix you. Right, That's what this attitude is. And to
Speaker 1: actually say like, no, I'm really grateful, I'm really I'm
Speaker 1: really all Like, in a way, the opposite of that
Speaker 1: consumerist never enough mindset is gratitude. Like that's actually the
Speaker 1: opposite of that mindset, And you're right, it makes us
Speaker 1: much happier. That consumerist mindset does not make us happy.
Speaker 1: And this idea of kind of getting in touch with like, no,
Speaker 1: I'm actually enough as it is. It gets to another
Speaker 1: benefit of taking some time off, which is that shabat
Speaker 1: can I actually help you get to know yourself a
Speaker 1: little bit better? Absolutely, Like It's funny like oftentimes people
Speaker 1: on shabat, they will go to like a Friday night
Speaker 1: service at a synagogue or Saturday and a Saturday morning service,
Speaker 1: and those are moments where you're you're just you're offline, right,
Speaker 1: You're actually in moments of prayer and reflection and quiet
Speaker 1: where like actually just have time with your own thoughts.
Speaker 1: You actually are listening to a voice other than that
Speaker 1: from your phone or your boss or your colleagues or whatever.
Speaker 1: And I think it does put you in touch with
Speaker 1: something deeper, you know, it does. It really puts you
Speaker 1: in touch with something that's more true. It can help you,
Speaker 1: I think, I don't know, kind of re engage with yourself.
Speaker 1: It also it offers you kind of a critical perspective
Speaker 1: on the other six days a week, right, Like, if
Speaker 1: you're constantly in that workday consumers mindset, you never have
Speaker 1: the critical distance from which to examine it and question
Speaker 1: it and kind of wonder about it. In those twenty
Speaker 1: five hours when you're out of that mindset, Suddenly you
Speaker 1: can think, like, wait a second, I really like this job,
Speaker 1: or like, is this relationship really a good relationship that
Speaker 1: I'm in? Like, you know, you can start to hear
Speaker 1: those voices that kind of exist on the edge of
Speaker 1: your consciousness during the week and there isn't space for them.
Speaker 1: Suddenly they're space for them, and that can be That
Speaker 1: can be hard because times their voices you don't want
Speaker 1: to hear. You're like, uh, just stop, Like I'd rather
Speaker 1: stay in this relationship because it's easy. I'd rather stay
Speaker 1: in this job because it's easy. But you can hear
Speaker 1: those voices that say, hey, this isn't you, this is
Speaker 1: not you, Like what are you doing? And I think
Speaker 1: that can lead to a lot of growth. Another set
Speaker 1: of voices you can hear just the people around you, right,
Speaker 1: like your family, your friends, right. I mean, another huge
Speaker 1: benefit of taking some time off is that we can
Speaker 1: actually connect with other people better if we have a
Speaker 1: bit more time exactly right. I mean, like think about
Speaker 1: how often, like I'll walk with Smims, I'll walk by you.
Speaker 1: I live in Washington, d C. And in the summer,
Speaker 1: everyone's eating outside and you'll walk by a table and
Speaker 1: see like four people on their phones and they're all
Speaker 1: sitting with each other. I'm like, hey, guys, I want
Speaker 1: to like wave in front of their faces, be like, look,
Speaker 1: there are all these people around you. I mean, think
Speaker 1: about how often when you're spending time with other people,
Speaker 1: at least one person's on their phone and they're not there,
Speaker 1: so like you kind of have half their attention, or
Speaker 1: you're kind of paying attention but not really. On Shabbat,
Speaker 1: if you're observing in a rigorous way, there are no phones, right,
Speaker 1: There's no TV, there's no screens, there is nothing to
Speaker 1: distract you from the people around you. And I think
Speaker 1: people listen to each other differently on Shabat. I think
Speaker 1: they are present with each other differently on Shabbat. And
Speaker 1: I mean, what a great way to strengthen relationships and
Speaker 1: strengthened families. And you know, so much research shows that,
Speaker 1: you know, one of the biggest hits right now to
Speaker 1: our happiness is that many of us don't feel like
Speaker 1: we have these strong social relationships. Many of us aren't connecting,
Speaker 1: we're not listening, you know, and that's actually leading to
Speaker 1: an epidemic in some ways of loneliness and things like that. Yes,
Speaker 1: and that is and look, it's like we have all
Speaker 1: this freedom right, that is the secular ethic, freedom, no obligations,
Speaker 1: do whatever you want. So everyone just kind of does
Speaker 1: their own thing, and it's kind of lonely and isolating.
Speaker 1: And what you see in Jewish communities where everyone's observing
Speaker 1: Shabbat is there's some constraint, right, there's an idea of like, no,
Speaker 1: we all have to take on this obligation to observe Shabbat.
Speaker 1: But with that constraint comes such beauty. You know, you
Speaker 1: have an entire community where everyone is like walking to
Speaker 1: the synagogue, seeing each other, celebrating this Shabbat together, eating
Speaker 1: meals together, They're all over each other's houses. You know,
Speaker 1: it's almost it reminds me of what my dad used
Speaker 1: to talk about growing up in the nineteen fifties, where
Speaker 1: it's like they all the neighbors knew each other, they
Speaker 1: were in each other's out of each other's houses. You know,
Speaker 1: there was a sense of a really rich, thick community,
Speaker 1: and I think we've kind of lost that again in
Speaker 1: this consumers world where so many of us are working
Speaker 1: so hard. You know, who has time? Like you know,
Speaker 1: you're working one or two jobs trying to support your family,
Speaker 1: and a lot of kids are just endlessly striving and
Speaker 1: working because they realize they've got to get into college
Speaker 1: in order to make enough money, so they're doing all
Speaker 1: these activities and it's like, oh my gosh, guys, we've
Speaker 1: just lost that sense of connection, and I think we've
Speaker 1: just lost this idea that we can take a break
Speaker 1: at all. And that gets to kind of one of
Speaker 1: the final benefits I wanted to talk to, which fits
Speaker 1: with the science, which is this idea of gaining a
Speaker 1: little bit of time affluence. So time affluence is this
Speaker 1: concept that social scientists talk about where it's your objective
Speaker 1: sense that you have some free time. It's like the
Speaker 1: opposite of what many of us go through on most days,
Speaker 1: which is sort of time famine where we're starving for time.
Speaker 1: And the research just shows that there's just the simple
Speaker 1: act of feeling like you have sometime can improve our
Speaker 1: well being. In fact, there's one study that shows that
Speaker 1: if you self report being time famished, that's as bad
Speaker 1: of a hit to your well being as if you
Speaker 1: self report being unemployed. You know, we know unemployment is
Speaker 1: like super bad for well being, but time famine is
Speaker 1: this too, And I think basically what Shabbat is trying
Speaker 1: to do is to stop at the time famine at
Speaker 1: least for one day and give you back a little
Speaker 1: bit of like affluence. I love of that that you know,
Speaker 1: you're right, it actually is a sense of time affluence
Speaker 1: because you know, every single week, I've got these twenty
Speaker 1: five hours every single week. It's never it's never a question,
Speaker 1: it's never in doubt. If you're someone who kind of
Speaker 1: really observes it rigorously, that's so interesting. You're right, it's time.
Speaker 1: It's time affluence. You're basically being granted this twenty five
Speaker 1: hours of time that's mandatory. And so now I want
Speaker 1: to get like slightly personal, because, as I've mentioned on
Speaker 1: this podcast before, you know, I follow lots of my
Speaker 1: happiness advice, but time affluence is one that I really
Speaker 1: struggle with with my busy schedule. And so if you're
Speaker 1: like me and you're struggling with this, like how can
Speaker 1: you build in a little bit of Shabbat time, even
Speaker 1: if it's not the full observant version, you know, how
Speaker 1: did you go about actually like opening that time up
Speaker 1: for yourself. Yeah, you know, I think like so many
Speaker 1: people I've talked to you about this, they're just like,
Speaker 1: I can't do the twenty five hours, right if if
Speaker 1: you're not Orthodox, if you don't have that sense of
Speaker 1: commandedness and it is optional, They're like, this just isn't realistic,
Speaker 1: you know, especially if you have kids and they have
Speaker 1: things going on that you need to care for them,
Speaker 1: or you have you've got to work these hours because
Speaker 1: you need to pay your bills, Like of course, right,
Speaker 1: Like that's okay. It doesn't have to be an Orthodox
Speaker 1: observance to be a meaningful observance. I think the quality
Speaker 1: is really more important than the quantity, right, So I
Speaker 1: actually think just saying, okay, I can't do the whole
Speaker 1: twenty five hours, but starting on Friday night at seven
Speaker 1: pm to midnight on Friday, I'm doing a rigorous shabat.
Speaker 1: Everything shut down, like no electronics, no atricity, Like I
Speaker 1: am just going to be so present with people, not
Speaker 1: going to answer any emails. I'm going to be just
Speaker 1: in it and just feeling that experience, right, just having
Speaker 1: that experience and if that's all you can do, great,
Speaker 1: and maybe you can try Friday night and maybe Saturday
Speaker 1: morning until noon. You know, you can kind of experiment
Speaker 1: and try different things. But I think the point is
Speaker 1: to actually get a taste of that really really different mindset,
Speaker 1: that like different kind of Shabbat time by Abraham Joshua
Speaker 1: Heschel called it, I think you believe he called it
Speaker 1: a sanctuary in time. Like it's actually kind of carving
Speaker 1: out time, which is something that Jews do throughout the year.
Speaker 1: And I think that's so beautiful because we're so obsessed
Speaker 1: now with things and accumulations. But to actually say no,
Speaker 1: time can be something that we carve out and that
Speaker 1: we actually kind of gift ourselves, I think is very powerful.
Speaker 1: And so when you've actually taken the time to do that,
Speaker 1: which I know is hard in your very brissy role,
Speaker 1: you know, what have been the benefits, I mean the
Speaker 1: personal benefits in terms of your own joy and happiness.
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh. I just you know, it's funny. When
Speaker 1: I was in the White House and doing it, I
Speaker 1: would start Shabat being so frazzled and just obsessively thinking
Speaker 1: about like, Okay, did I did I missed this edit
Speaker 1: from missus Obama? Did I get this thing? Right was
Speaker 1: the ending of the speech, okay, And it would just
Speaker 1: be these thoughts like spinning around my mind. But as
Speaker 1: I went to a Shabat service or a Shabbat dinner
Speaker 1: with friends, I would kind of get in the rhythm
Speaker 1: of it, right, Like those thoughts would kind of get
Speaker 1: quieter and quieter, and buy you know, eight or nine
Speaker 1: at night, I just kind of calmed down, and I
Speaker 1: would come home and my apartment would be so quiet.
Speaker 1: There'd be no phone to look at. Everything would just
Speaker 1: be really peaceful, and I would really feel myself starting
Speaker 1: to kind of settle in, you know, and I felt
Speaker 1: the I felt the effects on my own anxiety levels,
Speaker 1: Like I felt like it really calmed me down. I
Speaker 1: felt like I kind of transitioned into a much more
Speaker 1: reflective space where I was actually thinking deeper thoughts. You know.
Speaker 1: During the week, so many of my thoughts were these
Speaker 1: kind of you know, just there were work thoughts. It
Speaker 1: was like, Okay, did I get this sentence right? Did
Speaker 1: I get this speech to the right people? Oh? This
Speaker 1: call like I had an edit, Okay, let me make
Speaker 1: sure I respond to the email. But it was a
Speaker 1: slower pace for me on the and it was me
Speaker 1: thinking like, Okay, what do I want to do with
Speaker 1: my life? And how is this friendship I have going?
Speaker 1: Do I want to kind of reconsider that, you know,
Speaker 1: how is my family? Like I really just transitioned into
Speaker 1: a different space. It was almost like transitioning from head
Speaker 1: to heart. You know, it was just like a deeper,
Speaker 1: more spiritual space. I felt more spiritually connected on Shabbat,
Speaker 1: and you know, I really do think it helped me
Speaker 1: decide that I wanted to write this book on Judaism.
Speaker 1: You know, that was a pretty unusual post White House
Speaker 1: career move. I think most people were like, oh, you're
Speaker 1: going to write a book on speech writing or Missus
Speaker 1: Obama or politic or you're gonna help Missus Obama with
Speaker 1: her memoir. And those were all great options, right I
Speaker 1: could have been like a you know, a speechwriter to
Speaker 1: the stars or what I mean. There's so many great options.
Speaker 1: And I was thinking, Okay, I should do those things.
Speaker 1: But Shabbata actually let me listen to these quieter voices
Speaker 1: which are hard to hear among all those clamoring voices
Speaker 1: telling me what I should do. And I was like, oh,
Speaker 1: wait a second, maybe I don't want to do those things.
Speaker 1: Maybe I want to write this book to share the
Speaker 1: radical transformative wisdom that I found in Judaism. And I
Speaker 1: think it actually let me do that. It actually kind
Speaker 1: of gave it, let those thoughts take root and flourish
Speaker 1: enough so that I could actually feel comfortable doing that.
Speaker 1: I think if I hadn't had that space, I don't
Speaker 1: know if I would have ever developed that confidence to
Speaker 1: do what I really wanted to do next. And another thing,
Speaker 1: when I think about doing this, like when I think about, like,
Speaker 1: you know, actually taking twenty five hours off, I'm ashamed
Speaker 1: to admit this, but my immediate emotion is like anxiety,
Speaker 1: right that it's just like what am I gonna miss?
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, I'm even going to know what to
Speaker 1: do with myself. I mean, did you go through that
Speaker 1: a little bit when you started? Oh? Totally right. There
Speaker 1: is this fear of it's the fomo. It's the sense
Speaker 1: of all I'm getting behind, right, everyone else will be
Speaker 1: working then or achieving then, and like what am I
Speaker 1: doing taking this time off? Oh my gosh? And that
Speaker 1: is so much the consumerist mindset, right, It's like it's
Speaker 1: the always having to be on, always having to be
Speaker 1: doing so I definitely. I had so much of that anxiety.
Speaker 1: But I think once you commit to it and actually
Speaker 1: do it in whatever form that you do, you see
Speaker 1: the benefits. You know, you really do see the benefits
Speaker 1: in your life. And I actually think, I mean, look,
Speaker 1: the point of Shabbat is not to take a break
Speaker 1: so that you can work harder the other six days.
Speaker 1: You work hard the six days in order to get
Speaker 1: the break in Shabbat, right, It's not. It's not a
Speaker 1: rejuvenate so you can just crush even harder. That is
Speaker 1: not what Shabbat is. But you know, once you can
Speaker 1: kind of push through that anxiety, you'll be amazed at
Speaker 1: how much you can find to enjoy on Shabbat. Right
Speaker 1: where people are like what will I do with you myself,
Speaker 1: you realize like, oh, I can just like curl up
Speaker 1: and read a book. I can take a walk with
Speaker 1: a friend. I can just you know, enjoy a meal
Speaker 1: with people I love. I can take a nap. Taking
Speaker 1: a nap is like a big Shabat thing. A lot
Speaker 1: of people nap on Shabbat. I can just like stare
Speaker 1: out my window and look at the scenery around me.
Speaker 1: I mean, these are such simple things that people used
Speaker 1: to do back in the day and that we've lost
Speaker 1: sight of. And there's such simple joys and pleasures, but
Speaker 1: they really Shabat really does give you a lot to savor.
Speaker 1: And So if there's a listener who's hearing this, who's
Speaker 1: getting a little like shabat curious, you know, either because
Speaker 1: they're you know, like like not Jewish but kind of
Speaker 1: want to try it out, or you know, maybe like
Speaker 1: you were like Jewish but like really you know, weren't
Speaker 1: observant and weren't fitting it in before. What would be
Speaker 1: your advice to them to get started? Yeah, I would say, like,
Speaker 1: welcome in, man, this is great. And I would say,
Speaker 1: like it doesn't have you know, people I think set
Speaker 1: themselves up for failure when they think it has to
Speaker 1: be perfect. I have to do it twenty five hours
Speaker 1: and I have to follow every single rule ever, and
Speaker 1: if I don't do that, then it's it's all or nothing.
Speaker 1: And it's not all or nothing, right, Like, I think
Speaker 1: the general rule is like, look, the more you can do,
Speaker 1: the better, but do whatever you can, you know, just
Speaker 1: do whatever you can. And I think the really key
Speaker 1: idea is to make it feel different from the rest
Speaker 1: of the week. To make it a real pause from
Speaker 1: the rest of the week. So think carefully about Okay,
Speaker 1: what defines my week? You know? Is it this frantic
Speaker 1: work churn? Is it kind of driving kids to every
Speaker 1: possible place on the planet. Okay, how can I carve
Speaker 1: out some amount of time where I'm not doing those
Speaker 1: things and I'm doing something different? I think that's really
Speaker 1: the key. Regular Happiness Lab listeners know that I really
Speaker 1: really struggle with this stuff. Taking a break and reducing
Speaker 1: my workload is a huge challenge for me. But I've
Speaker 1: learned a ton from talking with Sarah. I'm going to
Speaker 1: try to follow some of her advice, even if it
Speaker 1: means marking out just a tiny space in my week
Speaker 1: that isn't it for work or edmund or chores. We'll
Speaker 1: be moving on from Judaism now, but our next episode
Speaker 1: will explore insights from another religious faith, one that's very
Speaker 1: much built on these foundations, Christianity. Specifically, we'll look more
Speaker 1: at what Christianity can teach us about coming to terms
Speaker 1: with upsetting events in our lives through the practice of forgiveness.
Speaker 1: So please come back next time for more Happiness Lessons
Speaker 1: of the Ancients with me Doctor Laurie Santos. The Happiness
Speaker 1: Lab is co written and produced by Ryan Dilley. The
Speaker 1: show was mastered by Evan Viola and our original music
Speaker 1: was composed by Zachary Silver. Special thanks to the entire
Speaker 1: Pushkin crew, including Neila Belle, Carlie Migliori, Heather Faine, Sophie Crane, mckibbon,
Speaker 1: Eric Sandler, Jacob Weissberg, and my agent, Ben Davis. The
Speaker 1: Happiness Lab is brought to you by Pushkin Industries and
Speaker 1: Nat Doctor Laurie Santos,