Speaker 1: Hey, that folks. It is Saturday, July Fit and welcome
Speaker 1: to your recovery run. That's welcome to a d day.
Speaker 1: This episode is dedicated to trying to recover, but we
Speaker 1: all went through during the week brow we started this
Speaker 1: this last weekend. Weeks are tough and oftentimes as runners,
Speaker 1: literal runners, we often have a recovery run. So explain
Speaker 1: to folks what we're talking about.
Speaker 2: Yes, a recovery run, if you're a runner, is a short, easy,
Speaker 2: low intensity run, and it's usually done after having a
Speaker 2: strenuous workout or several strenuous workouts, so that your muscles
Speaker 2: can recover. It reduces soreness, and it just actually makes
Speaker 2: you feel better, so you deliberately go slower and easier,
Speaker 2: and it's.
Speaker 3: Short, but it has a big impact.
Speaker 1: So the point of us doing a weekend morning run
Speaker 1: is to do all those things you just said to
Speaker 1: be slower, easier, less intense. And I guess the talk
Speaker 1: all week robes was absolutely about Ditty and the Ditty trial,
Speaker 1: but over the past several weeks, so just reading through
Speaker 1: that stuff watching news coverage, I'm pretty sure there's some
Speaker 1: parents who won't even allow their kids to watch some
Speaker 1: news coverage giving some of the subject matter, but that
Speaker 1: has been heavy. You don't have to be covering it.
Speaker 1: It's heavy and people have had heavy conversations around it,
Speaker 1: so it's good they could be.
Speaker 3: It's true if you think about it.
Speaker 2: Every time you read a news article or see something
Speaker 2: about the Didty trial, there's always a warning about explicit material,
Speaker 2: but also a warning for folks who have gone through
Speaker 2: any kind of domestic abuse or any sort of violence.
Speaker 2: They're warning that just reading about it or hearing about
Speaker 2: it can trigger up trigger old feelings or make it
Speaker 2: difficult for people to process pain and problems.
Speaker 3: So yeah, just.
Speaker 2: Seeing it, hearing it, reading it, and living it it
Speaker 2: does take a toll on you, not just mentally, but
Speaker 2: I think this sometimes as well.
Speaker 1: So we have been sharing with you all some of
Speaker 1: the things we do in these high intensity weeks. How
Speaker 1: do we try to take a beat, how do we
Speaker 1: try to recover? How do we try I guess to
Speaker 1: just slow life down a little bit? And first row,
Speaker 1: I guess we have didn't it. First of all, we
Speaker 1: haven't been great at it this week. No, I think
Speaker 1: we have fallen off and failed a little bit, and
Speaker 1: we prioritized work and there was a lot of it.
Speaker 1: But we haven't. We haven't done a great job.
Speaker 3: Yeah, full disclosure.
Speaker 2: So we had plans and I think sometimes this is
Speaker 2: maybe what we will do from here on out. But
Speaker 2: when you schedule and plan relaxing time, it actually works.
Speaker 2: We tried to do that this week, but unfortunately, because
Speaker 2: of the constant headlines with dinit trial, we didn't do
Speaker 2: what we set out to do.
Speaker 1: Will you say that we canceled our relaxation.
Speaker 3: We did.
Speaker 2: We canceled. We canceled our recovery runs this week. It
Speaker 2: was so frustrating, but we ended up having to do it,
Speaker 2: or we chose to do it. We chose to do it.
Speaker 2: I guess we could have chosen are choosing. Listen, this
Speaker 2: is why I need a recovery run. I just said, choosen.
Speaker 1: You need recovery sleep?
Speaker 3: I need I do need sleep. That's the first thing
Speaker 3: that we're gonna do. But we had tried to.
Speaker 2: We picked out a movie, we picked out a time,
Speaker 2: we picked out a theater, and then at the last
Speaker 2: minute we said, we have.
Speaker 1: Too much work to do. And now as you said that,
Speaker 1: I actually remember two thirty Alamo draft House Downtown movie playing.
Speaker 1: We had it set.
Speaker 3: Yes, twenty eight years later.
Speaker 2: We've been so excited about seeing this movie, and we
Speaker 2: really wanted to see it in theaters because it's a
Speaker 2: zombie movie, and of course those are always much better
Speaker 2: on a bigger screen. So we canceled that, and then
Speaker 2: we thought, you know what, let's punt you and I.
Speaker 2: All of our daughters happened to be out of town
Speaker 2: at the first part of this week, and so we thought,
Speaker 2: let's take advantage.
Speaker 1: Of that because we were going to have all of
Speaker 1: them for a long.
Speaker 2: Time, because that's where we're currently with all of them
Speaker 2: right now. Actually we've escaped from them for a quick
Speaker 2: moment to record this. But we decided, then let's go
Speaker 2: to dinner. Let's go have a wonderful steak. Sit down,
Speaker 2: We'll have a glass of red wine and a steak,
Speaker 2: and we'll just the two of us enjoy. We were
Speaker 2: so exhausted at the end of the day, we said, nah,
Speaker 2: let's just go to bed.
Speaker 3: You actually said let's just go to bed.
Speaker 1: This is embarrassing. Really, we always we preach this, We
Speaker 1: tell folks this, and look we do for ourselves. We
Speaker 1: do practice this. But I'm thinking about this week and
Speaker 1: I know the Ditty trial and everything that was happening
Speaker 1: coming at us this week was a lot. We had
Speaker 1: a lot to do, but it it did. We we
Speaker 1: failed a little bit this week. We have to find
Speaker 1: time together. You and I have to find time to
Speaker 1: just be the two of us. And even with our
Speaker 1: all the kids gone, we had no kid responsibility, and
Speaker 1: we still ended up working by choice fourteen to fifteen
Speaker 1: hours on a Friday.
Speaker 3: That was tough. That was That was a tough day.
Speaker 2: And then the rest of this week has been this same,
Speaker 2: even while we were traveling with our daughters midweek. And
Speaker 2: this is something we have left the city, which is helpful,
Speaker 2: and we are somewhere beautiful with our kids. But when
Speaker 2: you're somewhere beautiful with your kids, it's still a lot
Speaker 2: of work. And when you travel, you know, travel delays,
Speaker 2: the stress of getting on a plane and all of that.
Speaker 2: But then to have the Diddy trail verdict, it actually
Speaker 2: came down while we were traveling, so it ended up
Speaker 2: just being an exceptionally stressful days.
Speaker 1: Were stressed out. Okay, this is a terrible recovery run
Speaker 1: episode because all.
Speaker 2: About I will say something we did do in the
Speaker 2: last seven days. We drove out to a wooded path
Speaker 2: a rail trail. We're actually this is something we did
Speaker 2: for ourselves. We are training for We haven't said this yet.
Speaker 2: We were training for the Stockholm Marathon half marathon. And
Speaker 2: it's August thirtieth and we are traveling to Sweden to
Speaker 2: go run this half marathon, and so our training has
Speaker 2: begun and we went and just had a beautiful run
Speaker 2: five miles in a wooded path outside of the city.
Speaker 2: And for me and you can speak to it as well,
Speaker 2: but it was that was probably my favorite, my favorite
Speaker 2: thing we did together.
Speaker 1: Highlight of the week. Yes, it's probably that. The other
Speaker 1: thing we're trying to do to recover. We don't know
Speaker 1: if we're going to be able to pull off. But
Speaker 1: on this trip we have the girls with us, and
Speaker 1: on the trip, maybe the next day or so, we
Speaker 1: were hoping to get away from the girls so that
Speaker 1: you and I could go escape and have a nice
Speaker 1: dinner somewhere. This is so I didn't want to adult
Speaker 1: this much. This is supposed to be fun. This is
Speaker 1: too much adulting. We have to ask permission from the
Speaker 1: kids for us to go spend time together. What is happening, Yes.
Speaker 2: It's called parenthood, and as you said, have said, we
Speaker 2: are doing entirely too much parenting.
Speaker 3: But I know so many people listening can absolutely.
Speaker 2: Miserate and understand. We love our kids. They're a lot
Speaker 2: of fun. But I do think it's important to prioritize
Speaker 2: alone time, prioritize romantic time. And I think we also
Speaker 2: have an added issue of working together. And so what
Speaker 2: ends up happening is a lot of times when we
Speaker 2: talk and when we're together, we're working, we're talking about work,
Speaker 2: we're planning the next thing we're doing, and we're not
Speaker 2: actually just enjoying each other and just being with each other.
Speaker 2: And I think that is on our list of things
Speaker 2: to do. Our homework assignment for more recovery is to
Speaker 2: find that time to just be and enjoy.
Speaker 1: Something I have individually that has helped me. That we
Speaker 1: talked about this previously, but you've noticed it keeping our
Speaker 1: home space very tidy. It's one of those things you've
Speaker 1: noticed that everybody's noticed a long time. For me, if
Speaker 1: there's something going wrong internally, if there's something out of
Speaker 1: my control in life, somebody's pissed me off, or's something
Speaker 1: going right, I then go into a mode of controlling
Speaker 1: the controllables, which includes my environment.
Speaker 2: You pull out the windecks and I start cleaning. I mean,
Speaker 2: he's not kidding. And that's always when I know if
Speaker 2: he's really upset. If we've had a tough conversation and
Speaker 2: he starts just vigorously cleaning, I know he's bad. I'm like,
Speaker 2: oh no, this might take a day for him to recover,
Speaker 2: but his apartment is going to be The apartment is
Speaker 2: going to be spotless.
Speaker 1: Walk in and see that, you go, oh shit, what's wrong?
Speaker 1: Oh no, place looks too nice?
Speaker 3: What happened?
Speaker 2: But it's funny because I actually, I absolutely agree with
Speaker 2: your strategy because I didn't realize I did this as well.
Speaker 2: But I always feel better after I organize. I think
Speaker 2: everybody does. I always feel better after I clean. If
Speaker 2: I look around and see I don't see dust, I
Speaker 2: see everything's put away, I can relax.
Speaker 3: So it's true. I am the same way. Cleaning is healing.
Speaker 1: That's helped me this week. I didn't. It is one
Speaker 1: of those things that does help me recover with a
Speaker 1: little down, things aren't going away. Whatever you want to say.
Speaker 1: Getting a little depressed, I can clean. When you come in,
Speaker 1: you see I have more than two candles. Bit. You
Speaker 1: know this dude is trying to find his way back.
Speaker 2: Yes, you're looking for peace and that makes a lot
Speaker 2: of sense. And as you were a partner, I really
Speaker 2: appreciate it. I don't want to make you upset too often,
Speaker 2: but honestly, it's nice to have that be your outlet.
Speaker 2: There are so many other things that could be far
Speaker 2: worse that you could do if you're angry, to try
Speaker 2: and calm down, and if your go to is cleaning,
Speaker 2: I am all for them.
Speaker 1: People have different little normal What is it that people
Speaker 1: notice about their spouses when they are upset? What's usually
Speaker 1: the sign that they're a little stand authors are a
Speaker 1: little short or a little snappy or a little What
Speaker 1: are the things they noticed?
Speaker 2: Yes, and I think with drawn and a lot. Sometimes
Speaker 2: people just you know, can't get out of bed. Times,
Speaker 2: people start eating, some people start drinking. I mean, there's
Speaker 2: people go to their vices. Whatever makes them feel comfort. Right,
Speaker 2: cleaning is yours. I'll take it. Like I said, there
Speaker 2: are part What do I do when I'm upset? Do
Speaker 2: I withdraw?
Speaker 1: Oh? Your voice gets louder and you cry. There's no
Speaker 1: when there are no signs I need to look.
Speaker 3: For that's true crying.
Speaker 2: But you know what I I So it's a love
Speaker 2: hate relationship because when I do cry, I always feel better,
Speaker 2: there's a huge release.
Speaker 3: But I'm always embarrassed that I'm crying, because.
Speaker 1: Never get that. I never understand you're you're embarrassed that
Speaker 1: you're crying.
Speaker 2: I want to be I want to be more in control,
Speaker 2: and yet you know, my sadness or my anger comes
Speaker 2: in liquid form. What can I say? And it's always
Speaker 2: been like that. I think I've gotten a little bit
Speaker 2: better about crying less. I don't ever want it to
Speaker 2: look like I'm trying to throw myself a pity party.
Speaker 2: But then I'm trying to get attention or I'm trying
Speaker 2: to deflect from what's going on.
Speaker 3: I think, yes, you do you think it. I know
Speaker 3: you're thinking, can get but it's not. It's just an expression.
Speaker 2: It's just a release, basically, and and it does always
Speaker 2: make me feel better.
Speaker 1: There you go, hihen have you grid this week? Remember
Speaker 1: I haven't cried? Hey, that's far the recovery. Sometimes we
Speaker 1: need to get a good cry and maybe we can
Speaker 1: get one in before this episode ends.
Speaker 2: No, I really, I really don't want to do that,
Speaker 2: but I really would like to go to dinner with you, babe.
Speaker 2: So let's try to prioritize that, and hopefully next Saturday
Speaker 2: we will be able to share with our amazing listeners
Speaker 2: some actual recovery tips that we employed or we used
Speaker 2: through the week. So let's make that a priority for
Speaker 2: next week.
Speaker 1: I will, I will give this one. This is something
Speaker 1: we've done, and I we have to remember to do
Speaker 1: it sometimes. I don't know if that's good to bad,
Speaker 1: but I talk to you about this. You and I
Speaker 1: always have to be good for the rest of the
Speaker 1: family unit to be good. Sometimes we get caught up
Speaker 1: in doing this. Okay, Sabine needs this at least needs
Speaker 1: this need to put out this fire behavor. Okay, Savina
Speaker 1: is kind of friends are on the way. We get
Speaker 1: so caught up and doing all of this stuff that
Speaker 1: pulls us there or there. And I always say, as
Speaker 1: long as you and I are good and happy and strong,
Speaker 1: and I think we have made on this particular trip
Speaker 1: and in recent weeks, even when we're walking down the
Speaker 1: street with three girls, I don't like when we separate
Speaker 1: and I'm over here talking to Speen. If you're over
Speaker 1: there I like to keep you and I together and
Speaker 1: then everybody kind of comes together around us. Now, that
Speaker 1: is something that I do appreciate. That is a part
Speaker 1: of we can throw into the recovery run. But I
Speaker 1: think a lot of folks can relate to. And you
Speaker 1: see families walking down the street all the time with
Speaker 1: hell in New York, with tourists. The dad is in
Speaker 1: the front, the mom is in the very back. There
Speaker 1: are three kids and none of them talking to each other.
Speaker 3: It's so true.
Speaker 2: It's I mean, and you see, and it's one of
Speaker 2: those things when you do observe that, and it's so
Speaker 2: easy to fall into that. It's so easy, but it's
Speaker 2: good to remember to remind yourself, Hey, I love what
Speaker 2: you just said. Bit like seriously that I think that
Speaker 2: is so the key and we forget get to prate.
Speaker 2: We always put our kids first, and the unit, the couple,
Speaker 2: the parents last. And my parents didn't do that. They
Speaker 2: were the opposite. And I did have that as a
Speaker 2: model to look to. They always made sure that they
Speaker 2: were good and that they were solid. And my brother
Speaker 2: and I, you know, we looking now back on it,
Speaker 2: I appreciate it, and I'm so happy to have a
Speaker 2: partner who prioritizes that too, because I really do think
Speaker 2: it's something you have to consciously prioritize and talk about,
Speaker 2: because I so agree with that.
Speaker 1: But I've noticed it when right, okay, you might be
Speaker 1: talking to one of the girls trying to put out
Speaker 1: a fire, and I'm over here son to look at
Speaker 1: to being texts some little boys trying to text. We're
Speaker 1: doing all this stuff. Folks have a little anxiety around
Speaker 1: a table or something or issue when you and I
Speaker 1: are just engaged with each other and laughing and joking
Speaker 1: and having a good time, smiling and holding hands, and
Speaker 1: they just naturally feel and want to be a part
Speaker 1: of that. Yes, and I see it happen, and so
Speaker 1: that you know, I would ask that reminder a long
Speaker 1: or a recovery tip. That is one of them. You've
Speaker 1: got to make the couple the spouses they have to be.
Speaker 2: You have to be mindful and make sure that each
Speaker 2: other is doing all right, you know. And I want
Speaker 2: to thank you because I have seen you do that.
Speaker 2: I have seen you make an effort to come and
Speaker 2: to just hold my hand or to be with me
Speaker 2: when the girls are all there, so we don't feel separate.
Speaker 2: That thank you for that. I do appreciate that. It's
Speaker 2: I've noticed it, and it does make a huge difference.
Speaker 1: There you go. We look at that, and as we've
Speaker 1: been sitting here, the sun has come up, yes, and
Speaker 1: it's starting to get a little warm, and it feels fantastic.
Speaker 1: I don't know if folks could hear. I don't if
Speaker 1: the wind picked up on the mic here at all,
Speaker 1: but we are sitting what do you call this?
Speaker 3: It's a peer, this thing we're in, it's like a
Speaker 3: love seat on a peer.
Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, that's better than the debt.
Speaker 3: I was going to say, oh yes, it's an outdoor
Speaker 3: love seat lounging dabt.
Speaker 1: And nobody else here is up that. The whole piers
Speaker 1: ourselves for the most part. The waves are crashing right
Speaker 1: in front of us. I don't know if you all
Speaker 1: can hear that either, but this is a nice recovery.
Speaker 1: Get some son and get away for the girls and
Speaker 1: come to some work.
Speaker 3: Oh thank you all for listening, and we hope you
Speaker 3: all recover this weekend with us.