1 00:00:05,360 --> 00:00:07,360 Speaker 1: It's the radio segment that just got kicked off a 2 00:00:07,400 --> 00:00:11,800 Speaker 1: Southwest flight for bringing his emotional support wasp on the plane. 3 00:00:12,400 --> 00:00:15,040 Speaker 1: Why don't they understand The buzzing in his ear and 4 00:00:15,040 --> 00:00:21,400 Speaker 1: welts on his arm soothes him. Yeah, it's cute with 5 00:00:21,480 --> 00:00:24,480 Speaker 1: laser stories. The segment of we read weird news stories 6 00:00:24,480 --> 00:00:26,400 Speaker 1: around the globe just like everyone else does, it said, 7 00:00:26,400 --> 00:00:28,920 Speaker 1: we've got a laser. Those are the buzz Killington's just 8 00:00:29,000 --> 00:00:33,080 Speaker 1: don't This first laser story is out of China. Part 9 00:00:33,120 --> 00:00:34,879 Speaker 1: of me wants to know what kind of video this 10 00:00:34,960 --> 00:00:39,240 Speaker 1: couple was filming. Me hot start, Yeah, part of me doesn't. 11 00:00:39,280 --> 00:00:41,760 Speaker 1: Because a guy in China showed up at the er 12 00:00:41,960 --> 00:00:45,680 Speaker 1: after getting his girlfriend's entire fist stuck in his mouth. 13 00:00:47,840 --> 00:00:50,120 Speaker 1: I'm glad it was stuck there just for you know, 14 00:00:50,440 --> 00:00:54,000 Speaker 1: family friendly show missus. The couples said it happened while 15 00:00:54,040 --> 00:00:57,320 Speaker 1: filming a video for social media, and I'm showing my 16 00:00:57,400 --> 00:00:59,720 Speaker 1: host a picture of it so you can go check 17 00:00:59,760 --> 00:01:02,000 Speaker 1: it out on our instant stories. At Brook and Jeffery, 18 00:01:02,120 --> 00:01:04,560 Speaker 1: I can't tell who this is more painful for her 19 00:01:04,800 --> 00:01:07,200 Speaker 1: or him. Yeah, because the picture we're looking at is 20 00:01:07,240 --> 00:01:10,279 Speaker 1: a still shot of them walking into the hospital together. 21 00:01:10,600 --> 00:01:14,520 Speaker 1: He is gagging and drooling while also trying not to laugh. 22 00:01:15,280 --> 00:01:18,399 Speaker 1: How is this possible? Hand doesn't I mean her wrist is. 23 00:01:20,720 --> 00:01:24,880 Speaker 1: She's got giant knuckles, though probably the thickest knuckles you 24 00:01:24,920 --> 00:01:27,360 Speaker 1: can have. They're anchored in the back of his throats. Yeah, 25 00:01:27,400 --> 00:01:29,919 Speaker 1: because it doesn't seem like her tiny hand should get stuck. 26 00:01:30,040 --> 00:01:32,920 Speaker 1: But some people think it may have been staged. But 27 00:01:33,000 --> 00:01:35,520 Speaker 1: the doctor who treated them reportedly said the guy's muscles 28 00:01:35,560 --> 00:01:40,160 Speaker 1: seized up and his jaw locked wo kind of like 29 00:01:40,160 --> 00:01:44,080 Speaker 1: a panic reaction. They gave him muscle relaxes and used 30 00:01:44,080 --> 00:01:48,160 Speaker 1: a mouth opener. Then they slowly twisted his girlfriend's wrist 31 00:01:48,280 --> 00:01:50,880 Speaker 1: to get her hand out, which took about twenty minutes. 32 00:01:51,080 --> 00:01:53,720 Speaker 1: Whoa did they use the jaws of life to open 33 00:01:53,800 --> 00:01:56,640 Speaker 1: his jaws? Yea, if that's what the mouth opener was. 34 00:01:56,800 --> 00:01:59,840 Speaker 1: It's something like that at home. Is that what you're saying? 35 00:02:01,280 --> 00:02:05,520 Speaker 1: Not needed? Hey? You know they were filming the video 36 00:02:05,600 --> 00:02:09,600 Speaker 1: trying for internet fame and they got it. A lifetime 37 00:02:10,320 --> 00:02:13,000 Speaker 1: never happens away expected. No, how would you like to 38 00:02:13,040 --> 00:02:15,520 Speaker 1: be known as mister fittsmouth for the rest of your life? 39 00:02:15,600 --> 00:02:17,760 Speaker 1: I mean, she's lucky that her face isn't in this 40 00:02:17,880 --> 00:02:21,920 Speaker 1: viral photo. Yeah, yeah, it's all This next Lazer story 41 00:02:21,960 --> 00:02:25,960 Speaker 1: is out of the friendly skies. A United Airlines flight 42 00:02:26,000 --> 00:02:28,400 Speaker 1: from la to Shanghai had to turn around over the 43 00:02:28,400 --> 00:02:36,320 Speaker 1: Pacific recently, all because a pilot forgot his passport. They 44 00:02:36,360 --> 00:02:40,720 Speaker 1: have to have them country in a country. Yeah, it 45 00:02:40,800 --> 00:02:43,079 Speaker 1: was already set to be a fourteen hour flight. They 46 00:02:43,120 --> 00:02:45,600 Speaker 1: turned around about an hour and forty five minutes in 47 00:02:45,800 --> 00:02:49,000 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, then landed in San Francisco to swap out 48 00:02:49,000 --> 00:02:50,560 Speaker 1: the crew. Oh my god, they had to get a 49 00:02:50,560 --> 00:02:54,040 Speaker 1: whole new crew. Yeah. I think it's standards policy. So 50 00:02:54,240 --> 00:02:58,040 Speaker 1: passengers were told there had been a crew related issue, 51 00:02:58,240 --> 00:03:01,600 Speaker 1: which is true, but they didn't hear about the passport 52 00:03:01,639 --> 00:03:06,680 Speaker 1: thing until later. They waited for about five hours before 53 00:03:06,720 --> 00:03:10,000 Speaker 1: finally taking off again, ended up landing and shang High 54 00:03:10,000 --> 00:03:15,239 Speaker 1: about six hours behind. Couldn't they just have, like, I 55 00:03:15,240 --> 00:03:17,400 Speaker 1: don't know, called somebody and put the guy's passport on 56 00:03:17,440 --> 00:03:19,680 Speaker 1: another plane that was behind them, made him wait at 57 00:03:19,680 --> 00:03:22,120 Speaker 1: the air like there's gotta be other solutions to this, yeah, 58 00:03:23,440 --> 00:03:27,160 Speaker 1: and then don't go anywhere, just get right back to America. Maybe, 59 00:03:27,160 --> 00:03:31,760 Speaker 1: but the unexpected great news. United felt horrible about what happened, 60 00:03:32,040 --> 00:03:37,040 Speaker 1: and they reimbursed each and every passenger reimburse even not 61 00:03:37,400 --> 00:03:40,720 Speaker 1: for the flight. Everybody received a fifteen dollars meal voucher 62 00:03:41,720 --> 00:03:44,640 Speaker 1: because their food was probably a little bit cold at 63 00:03:44,640 --> 00:03:49,400 Speaker 1: the time they made anyway, and they say the airlines 64 00:03:49,400 --> 00:03:51,840 Speaker 1: don't look out for the little people anymore. Good job 65 00:03:51,960 --> 00:03:54,200 Speaker 1: United could almost get half a sandwich at the airport 66 00:03:54,360 --> 00:03:58,520 Speaker 1: that we land. Their story is out of happy hour 67 00:03:58,600 --> 00:04:03,720 Speaker 1: hubs there. Yes, Fireball Whiskey's having the promotion of the year. 68 00:04:04,080 --> 00:04:07,920 Speaker 1: You can win a lifetime supply, but there is one 69 00:04:07,960 --> 00:04:11,000 Speaker 1: big wrinkle. To win. You have to be at least 70 00:04:11,280 --> 00:04:15,640 Speaker 1: ninety years old. I've fallen and I can get out. 71 00:04:15,840 --> 00:04:19,800 Speaker 1: Is that what you said? Wrinkle? Yeah, one very very large, 72 00:04:19,920 --> 00:04:23,520 Speaker 1: very deep wrinkle. They claim they're doing it because Fireball 73 00:04:23,600 --> 00:04:28,080 Speaker 1: is oddly popular with the older demographics. Quote senior citizens 74 00:04:28,279 --> 00:04:31,039 Speaker 1: love fireball, and who are we to argue with their 75 00:04:31,200 --> 00:04:35,240 Speaker 1: years of wisdom. I agree. It reminds me of the 76 00:04:35,279 --> 00:04:38,719 Speaker 1: red hot candies we have. Yeah, I love those. It's funny. 77 00:04:39,000 --> 00:04:42,520 Speaker 1: I've actually kind of seen this in real life. I've 78 00:04:42,520 --> 00:04:44,719 Speaker 1: been at a bar. The older folks they call it 79 00:04:44,880 --> 00:04:49,360 Speaker 1: spiced wine. Spice wine is a thing, though, They refer 80 00:04:49,440 --> 00:04:52,200 Speaker 1: to fireball as a type of spiced wine. They don't 81 00:04:52,240 --> 00:04:55,640 Speaker 1: consider it like a whisky. When you use bars and quotes, 82 00:04:55,720 --> 00:04:57,279 Speaker 1: does that mean when you were hanging out at the 83 00:04:57,320 --> 00:04:59,960 Speaker 1: Senior Center. No, what, We're not getting into the details 84 00:05:00,080 --> 00:05:02,520 Speaker 1: of my life. I'm just talking about the old folks 85 00:05:02,520 --> 00:05:05,479 Speaker 1: and what they say. Online commentars have had a field 86 00:05:05,520 --> 00:05:07,839 Speaker 1: day with this. One person said, the best part a 87 00:05:07,880 --> 00:05:12,320 Speaker 1: lifetime supply Fireball at ninety plus. It's basically one bottle. Yeah, 88 00:05:12,600 --> 00:05:14,760 Speaker 1: unless it somehow makes you live longer. What if the 89 00:05:14,839 --> 00:05:17,040 Speaker 1: jokes on there they have to pay for twenty years 90 00:05:17,040 --> 00:05:20,280 Speaker 1: of fireballs as possible. Another one said, congrats to the 91 00:05:20,320 --> 00:05:22,960 Speaker 1: winners at ninety plus, they finally have a reason to 92 00:05:23,000 --> 00:05:25,839 Speaker 1: throw a house party if they can stay awake past 93 00:05:25,839 --> 00:05:30,719 Speaker 1: seven pm. Somebody that's roasting the old Yeah, why can't 94 00:05:30,720 --> 00:05:33,479 Speaker 1: they have a three pm house party? What time is 95 00:05:33,480 --> 00:05:37,120 Speaker 1: happyer for oldies like eleven am? Probably anybody born in 96 00:05:37,240 --> 00:05:40,360 Speaker 1: nineteen thirty five or earlier can go sign up at 97 00:05:40,680 --> 00:05:44,320 Speaker 1: lifetime supply of Fireball dot com, or if they're young 98 00:05:44,400 --> 00:05:46,799 Speaker 1: enough to drink but too old to use a computer, 99 00:05:47,160 --> 00:05:50,719 Speaker 1: you can nominate them. Oyay, Hey, if you're one of 100 00:05:50,760 --> 00:05:53,719 Speaker 1: our two ninety plus year old listeners, let us know. 101 00:05:53,800 --> 00:05:55,760 Speaker 1: We'll do it for you texting seven eighty five nine 102 00:05:55,800 --> 00:05:57,840 Speaker 1: two we can sign you up. The deadline is the 103 00:05:58,000 --> 00:06:01,000 Speaker 1: end of this month. Oh that your next Lazer short 104 00:06:01,120 --> 00:06:05,320 Speaker 1: is out of syntax city. The English language recently got 105 00:06:05,320 --> 00:06:08,479 Speaker 1: a new word. Have you heard of? Boomera Asking a 106 00:06:10,120 --> 00:06:14,239 Speaker 1: sounds like boomer asking a question. It's not about baby boomers. 107 00:06:14,880 --> 00:06:18,280 Speaker 1: Boomer askings when you ask someone a question just so 108 00:06:18,320 --> 00:06:21,920 Speaker 1: that you can talk about yourself, like you want the 109 00:06:22,000 --> 00:06:25,480 Speaker 1: question to come back to you like a boomerang. Yeah, 110 00:06:25,520 --> 00:06:30,440 Speaker 1: it's a boomerang, like okay, boom boomer asking. Common example 111 00:06:30,520 --> 00:06:33,520 Speaker 1: is when you did something awesome over the weekend. So 112 00:06:33,600 --> 00:06:36,280 Speaker 1: you show up to work on Monday and ask somebody, Oh, 113 00:06:36,360 --> 00:06:39,360 Speaker 1: do you do anything fun on Saturday? Well, listen to this. Yeah. 114 00:06:40,240 --> 00:06:42,720 Speaker 1: So a blogger coined the term just a few years ago, 115 00:06:42,800 --> 00:06:45,039 Speaker 1: and the study found we do it because we think 116 00:06:45,080 --> 00:06:47,839 Speaker 1: that's a polite way for us to bring something up, 117 00:06:48,080 --> 00:06:51,000 Speaker 1: but it doesn't always land that well. Yeah, by the way, 118 00:06:51,000 --> 00:06:53,719 Speaker 1: did you guys have good streams this last weekend? Yeah? 119 00:06:55,800 --> 00:06:58,440 Speaker 1: I'm a streamer. Oh, I'm on kick, I'm hilarious. Jose, 120 00:06:58,720 --> 00:07:02,800 Speaker 1: I think It's interesting. I think you actually listen to 121 00:07:02,839 --> 00:07:06,320 Speaker 1: the person's answer the whole time. You're just thank you 122 00:07:06,400 --> 00:07:10,640 Speaker 1: to met. Yeah. When we realize somebody's boomerer asking, though, 123 00:07:10,640 --> 00:07:13,080 Speaker 1: we tend to think that they're just being self absorbed. 124 00:07:14,560 --> 00:07:19,720 Speaker 1: All I know is follow at hilarious Jose And again, 125 00:07:19,840 --> 00:07:22,080 Speaker 1: you guys don't have a stream. I'm the only one 126 00:07:22,080 --> 00:07:24,880 Speaker 1: that has one. Yeah, okay, I'm just bringing it up questions. 127 00:07:25,520 --> 00:07:28,240 Speaker 1: That's a good question. Yeah, thank you. This guy I 128 00:07:28,240 --> 00:07:31,600 Speaker 1: know is way too busy to be boomer asking. Oh yeah, 129 00:07:31,840 --> 00:07:35,120 Speaker 1: spending all his free time boomer shoeing and whatever you do. 130 00:07:35,120 --> 00:07:38,080 Speaker 1: Do not look up that term on Urban Dictionary. Ok. 131 00:07:38,600 --> 00:07:40,880 Speaker 1: Not a lot of talking going on. And that's how 132 00:07:40,880 --> 00:07:42,840 Speaker 1: it means. Laser Stories has come to end for a day. 133 00:07:42,880 --> 00:07:46,120 Speaker 1: We'll do it again, same time on Friday, Brook and 134 00:07:46,280 --> 00:07:47,320 Speaker 1: Jeffrey in the morning.