1 00:00:03,440 --> 00:00:06,720 Speaker 1: Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of I Heart Radio. 2 00:00:09,440 --> 00:00:15,680 Speaker 1: Good Morning. This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. 3 00:00:16,880 --> 00:00:20,319 Speaker 1: Today's tip is that if you're doing something for fun 4 00:00:21,280 --> 00:00:25,360 Speaker 1: and it turns out not to be fun, you can stop. 5 00:00:26,760 --> 00:00:32,680 Speaker 1: Just because you started doesn't mean you have to finish. 6 00:00:33,200 --> 00:00:37,479 Speaker 1: I know that Before Breakfast listeners are diligent and persistent people. 7 00:00:38,800 --> 00:00:41,599 Speaker 1: So my guess is that many folks listening to this 8 00:00:42,080 --> 00:00:46,080 Speaker 1: have started watching a movie and then realized five minutes 9 00:00:46,120 --> 00:00:49,720 Speaker 1: in that it was going to be a dud. Yet 10 00:00:50,280 --> 00:00:55,000 Speaker 1: you stayed until the end. You have finished books that 11 00:00:55,080 --> 00:00:59,160 Speaker 1: you didn't enjoy. You have eaten a whole order of 12 00:00:59,200 --> 00:01:03,760 Speaker 1: French fries, which from the first bite was irredeemably cold 13 00:01:03,960 --> 00:01:07,959 Speaker 1: and soggy. You have dutifully shown up at a book 14 00:01:07,959 --> 00:01:14,120 Speaker 1: club every month, even though you dreaded it. What's funny 15 00:01:14,160 --> 00:01:17,520 Speaker 1: about this is that people go to movies, read books, 16 00:01:17,880 --> 00:01:21,920 Speaker 1: eat French fries, and make social plans because these things 17 00:01:21,959 --> 00:01:26,119 Speaker 1: are supposed to be enjoyable. It's not like your soul 18 00:01:26,319 --> 00:01:29,319 Speaker 1: was going to be elevated by that action movie, or 19 00:01:29,360 --> 00:01:32,600 Speaker 1: that the French fries were going to have any nutritional value. 20 00:01:33,680 --> 00:01:39,240 Speaker 1: They are supposed to be fun, full stop. So why 21 00:01:39,360 --> 00:01:42,080 Speaker 1: do we continue doing things that we are supposed to 22 00:01:42,200 --> 00:01:48,120 Speaker 1: enjoy if they are not enjoyable. I've thought about this 23 00:01:48,240 --> 00:01:51,920 Speaker 1: a lot, and I suppose sometimes we go on autopilot. 24 00:01:52,840 --> 00:01:55,440 Speaker 1: We stick with what we started because we aren't really 25 00:01:55,520 --> 00:01:59,440 Speaker 1: noticing that we're not getting anything out of it. Maybe 26 00:01:59,520 --> 00:02:02,280 Speaker 1: other times we are hoping against hope that it will 27 00:02:02,320 --> 00:02:06,360 Speaker 1: get better eventually, that next French fry will be hot, 28 00:02:07,160 --> 00:02:09,320 Speaker 1: or the next book club get together will be fun. 29 00:02:10,560 --> 00:02:14,160 Speaker 1: And then sometimes we may feel guilty or embarrassed or 30 00:02:14,320 --> 00:02:18,640 Speaker 1: silly that we've sunk time and money into something like 31 00:02:18,720 --> 00:02:22,160 Speaker 1: maybe that Flamenco dancing class that we thought we'd like 32 00:02:23,120 --> 00:02:27,880 Speaker 1: but we actually hate. But you know what, even if 33 00:02:27,919 --> 00:02:30,120 Speaker 1: you have bought the shoes and paid for the lessons, 34 00:02:30,680 --> 00:02:36,360 Speaker 1: you can still stop. Sunk Costs are sunk. If you 35 00:02:36,360 --> 00:02:40,080 Speaker 1: are not enjoying what you are doing for enjoyment, you 36 00:02:40,120 --> 00:02:44,440 Speaker 1: can walk away. Don't spend any more time in a 37 00:02:44,480 --> 00:02:49,280 Speaker 1: way that you aren't enjoying. As is so often true, 38 00:02:49,320 --> 00:02:52,520 Speaker 1: it is helpful to get clear on your purpose. Because, 39 00:02:52,560 --> 00:02:54,600 Speaker 1: of course, there are plenty of things in life that 40 00:02:54,639 --> 00:02:58,760 Speaker 1: we are obligated to persist in. You probably have to 41 00:02:58,840 --> 00:03:01,480 Speaker 1: persist in your job until you can find a new one. 42 00:03:02,520 --> 00:03:06,079 Speaker 1: You have to persist in a volunteer leadership role until 43 00:03:06,120 --> 00:03:09,640 Speaker 1: you can find a replacement. You have to persist in 44 00:03:09,720 --> 00:03:14,480 Speaker 1: parenting until your kids are grown, even if the little 45 00:03:14,520 --> 00:03:20,919 Speaker 1: angels can turn into little monsters with some regularity. There 46 00:03:20,960 --> 00:03:24,400 Speaker 1: are also things we choose to do for reasons beyond enjoyment. 47 00:03:25,440 --> 00:03:28,200 Speaker 1: Even if you don't like to exercise, you may do 48 00:03:28,240 --> 00:03:32,560 Speaker 1: it anyway to keep your heart healthy. Driving a long 49 00:03:32,600 --> 00:03:35,120 Speaker 1: way to visit an elderly relative may not be fun, 50 00:03:35,840 --> 00:03:39,360 Speaker 1: but you love your relative and you value family, so 51 00:03:39,520 --> 00:03:43,960 Speaker 1: you do it. Perhaps you even hate chopping, but you 52 00:03:44,000 --> 00:03:47,760 Speaker 1: do have to get closed somehow. There are things we 53 00:03:47,800 --> 00:03:52,120 Speaker 1: do out of obligation and things we do for higher purposes. 54 00:03:53,040 --> 00:03:56,360 Speaker 1: But if you are doing something for enjoyment and you 55 00:03:56,400 --> 00:04:03,080 Speaker 1: are not enjoying it, then something is off. So remind 56 00:04:03,120 --> 00:04:06,960 Speaker 1: yourself that it is okay not to finish. You can 57 00:04:07,000 --> 00:04:10,760 Speaker 1: throw away the cold fries, you can quit the tedious 58 00:04:10,760 --> 00:04:14,040 Speaker 1: book club. You can shut the bad book or walk 59 00:04:14,080 --> 00:04:17,560 Speaker 1: away from the boring movie. When you are clear on 60 00:04:17,640 --> 00:04:20,760 Speaker 1: your purpose, you will be able to decide what to 61 00:04:20,839 --> 00:04:25,440 Speaker 1: stick with and what to let go of. Is there 62 00:04:25,440 --> 00:04:28,839 Speaker 1: anything that you think you'd be better off quitting. I'd 63 00:04:28,920 --> 00:04:31,440 Speaker 1: love to hear about it. You can let me know 64 00:04:32,400 --> 00:04:38,280 Speaker 1: at Laura at Laura Vanderkam dot com. In the meantime, 65 00:04:39,400 --> 00:04:43,799 Speaker 1: this is Laura. Thanks for listening, and here's to making 66 00:04:43,800 --> 00:04:53,599 Speaker 1: the most of our time. Hey, everybody, I'd love to 67 00:04:53,640 --> 00:04:56,600 Speaker 1: hear from you. You can send me your tips, your questions, 68 00:04:56,680 --> 00:05:00,480 Speaker 1: or anything else. Just connect with me on Twitter, Acebook 69 00:05:00,560 --> 00:05:05,359 Speaker 1: and Instagram at Before Breakfast Pod. That's b E the 70 00:05:05,440 --> 00:05:09,680 Speaker 1: number four, then breakfast p o D. You can also 71 00:05:09,680 --> 00:05:13,400 Speaker 1: shoot me an email at Before Breakfast podcast at iHeart 72 00:05:13,440 --> 00:05:16,279 Speaker 1: media dot com. That Before Breakfast is spelled out with 73 00:05:16,320 --> 00:05:18,960 Speaker 1: all the letters. Thanks so much. Should I look forward 74 00:05:18,960 --> 00:05:27,159 Speaker 1: to staying in touch. Before Breakfast is a production of 75 00:05:27,200 --> 00:05:30,520 Speaker 1: I Heart Radio. For more podcasts from my heart Radio, 76 00:05:31,000 --> 00:05:34,520 Speaker 1: visit the i heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever 77 00:05:34,560 --> 00:05:35,920 Speaker 1: you listen to your favorite shows.