Speaker 1: Are you leaving? I you wanna way back home?
Speaker 2: Either way, we want to be there, doesn't matter how.
Speaker 1: Much baggage you claim.
Speaker 2: Give us time and a Turmanol and gay.
Speaker 3: We want to send you off InStyle. You wanna welcome
Speaker 3: you back home?
Speaker 1: Tell us all about it.
Speaker 4: We scared her?
Speaker 1: Was it fine? Now?
Speaker 4: Porn?
Speaker 1: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 5: Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?
Speaker 5: Do you need ride?
Speaker 6: With Karen and Chris welcome to Do you need ride?
Speaker 6: I've just gott in the car.
Speaker 4: I'm Karen Kilgareff and.
Speaker 6: I'm Chris Fairbanks. I have just been picked up Tim Gun.
Speaker 6: Tim that was real Tim Gun.
Speaker 4: That was the real Tim Gun. We just drove by.
Speaker 6: Wow, that really was There's no mistaken.
Speaker 4: Oh my god. That is such good luck.
Speaker 6: You know, that's good luck every time. I mean, I
Speaker 6: get used to seeing celebrities, but not as I'm driving through,
Speaker 6: not to where I could almost run over them with
Speaker 6: the car.
Speaker 7: And also he's such a good celebrity, Like that's a
Speaker 7: quality person.
Speaker 6: Do you think Yeah, I think I think I like
Speaker 6: what he does. I'm just checking the everything looks. Does
Speaker 6: it look all right, it looks fantastic.
Speaker 4: God, it's really it's really hard.
Speaker 7: I tried to start myself by myself, yes, and literally
Speaker 7: after fifteen seconds, I wanted.
Speaker 4: To bail so bad. Oh, really, to talk by yourself.
Speaker 4: I don't know how people do it the.
Speaker 6: Time I did it, because I did do one yeah
Speaker 6: episode somewhere around ten yeah, and I yeah, I felt
Speaker 6: like I was a crazy person. It felt self indulgent,
Speaker 6: and I felt like I was blurting things, and I
Speaker 6: got in trouble with the girlfriend at the time and
Speaker 6: my sister with some of the That's what I said.
Speaker 4: For some of the blurts.
Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah, No, not my sister. She didn't know. But anyway,
Speaker 6: some people were mad at me.
Speaker 4: Well, uh, you were very funny though. That's what I
Speaker 4: was thinking of the whole time.
Speaker 7: I was like, yeah, you gotta if you're going to
Speaker 7: do this, you have to at least bring bring what
Speaker 7: Fairbanks bought. And literally the second I started, I was like,
Speaker 7: I'm not even saying anything, and my face got all hot,
Speaker 7: and then I just started talking about all the news
Speaker 7: stories that scared me, and I was like, why the
Speaker 7: fuck would anybody want to.
Speaker 4: Listen to that?
Speaker 6: That's great, that's what you did.
Speaker 4: Turns.
Speaker 6: I bet if you listen to it, you would have
Speaker 6: loved it. I was having a great time watching because
Speaker 6: we've talked about this at the airport, watching everyone get
Speaker 6: into cars and embrace the people, their loved ones. I
Speaker 6: was really enjoying it. Yeah, and I had a very
Speaker 6: fun time bonding with comedians at the Big Sky Comedy Festival.
Speaker 4: Oh good.
Speaker 6: I almost didn't want to go because you know, it's
Speaker 6: a contest, and I didn't know a lot of the comics.
Speaker 6: I knew a couple and I was excited to hang
Speaker 6: out with them, but I didn't want to pay for
Speaker 6: a flight and all that. But it was. It was
Speaker 6: really fun and we had activities. And Billings, Montana is
Speaker 6: also beautiful, not just Missoula Montana because I thought, well,
Speaker 6: they don't have rocky mountains, they don't have the mountain ranges.
Speaker 7: You thought Billings was the shithole that couldn't compete with
Speaker 7: miss l It's very conservative.
Speaker 6: There's good. We got some Duck Dynasty Pelon types, but
Speaker 6: we have those in Missoula too, so.
Speaker 4: You have them in La too.
Speaker 6: Yes, they're everywhere, but in Billings sometimes they'll be like
Speaker 6: the mayor or something. They'll be the voice reason, they'll
Speaker 6: be the voice of your morning radio. Uh just spitting
Speaker 6: out the hate. And I did hear some racist stuff. Anyway,
Speaker 6: it doesn't matter.
Speaker 4: Best time ever, can't solve it all. In one comedy
Speaker 4: festival weekend, I didn't.
Speaker 6: Win, but I got third, which is cool because uh
Speaker 6: oh that's great. The guy that won was great though.
Speaker 6: He was named Tommy Pope. I've never met him or.
Speaker 4: Heard of him New York and what why did you
Speaker 4: think he was great?
Speaker 6: He was just good at stand up and told stories
Speaker 6: about things that had happened that week, opened and closed
Speaker 6: with those stories shit, and I was like, wow, I
Speaker 6: would not have taken that risk at the finals of
Speaker 6: a contest, and he killed with those stories and just likable.
Speaker 6: And then a guy named Tony Baker got second. He's
Speaker 6: a comic I've heard of that I otherwise wouldn't be
Speaker 6: doing the same shows, you know with So it was yeah,
Speaker 6: yeah everyone. It was a lot of different comics and
Speaker 6: I had fun with Patrick Keane.
Speaker 4: He makes me laugh, he's serious.
Speaker 6: We just had a great time. So yay, it's the
Speaker 6: Big Sky Comedy Festival.
Speaker 7: That's great because you were telling me about you were
Speaker 7: worried that there were activities this way.
Speaker 6: Yeah, yes, and some of them I just didn't go.
Speaker 6: I shot guns, and I've never really shot. I think
Speaker 6: once in the woods, I shot a rifle that was
Speaker 6: not that like a twenty two and shot some clay
Speaker 6: like discs that you fling in the air. And that
Speaker 6: was kind of cool because you're shooting a thing, sure,
Speaker 6: and you're in a field. But going into a shooting
Speaker 6: range with a bunch of comics that were nervous to
Speaker 6: hold an guns, I think that everyone in there there
Speaker 6: with something about a comedic mind not liking guns. And
Speaker 6: everyone was like, I don't like how this feels. Like
Speaker 6: people talk about shooting guns and there's power or it.
Speaker 6: And I'm like, eh, I know, maybe I guess, I
Speaker 6: guess I'm not above it. Maybe I would like it.
Speaker 6: I did not like it. Yeah, I didn't like how
Speaker 6: it felt and as you shoot it, it clearly would
Speaker 6: kill somebody. Yeah, guns are with a little the bullet.
Speaker 6: I know, I'm this sounds dumb that I'm even saying
Speaker 6: something so obvious, but they really are powerful and scary, yes,
Speaker 6: and loud, And I thought, I really thought at any
Speaker 6: point I'd lose control of my body and just turn
Speaker 6: and shoot a comedian.
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's the thing.
Speaker 6: I guess I'm shooting Jackie Fabulous, who was delightful. I
Speaker 6: would never shoot her.
Speaker 4: I'm just saying, well, that's the thing. There's so much
Speaker 4: risk involved.
Speaker 7: It's like the idea that people think this is, this
Speaker 7: is what's going to make me feel safe, is is
Speaker 7: just such a lie. It is that people are telling
Speaker 7: themselves because there's nothing less safe.
Speaker 6: The most horrifying thing in thinking about it was what
Speaker 6: if I shot somebody and that's what they're for, So
Speaker 6: don't have one.
Speaker 4: If that's your fear, Yes, for sure.
Speaker 6: Even if someone I'd have to Someone would have to
Speaker 6: be doing something crazy and I'd have to be so sure.
Speaker 6: It actually made me respect cops a little bit because
Speaker 6: it would be so horrifying to have the right or
Speaker 6: the ability to be able to do that. I just
Speaker 6: wouldn't ever. I would if I was a cop, I'd
Speaker 6: get shot right away because I wouldn't drop my gun. Well,
Speaker 6: he doesn't look that, quid. Let's listen to reason. Well,
Speaker 6: he is pointing at me, that's my last thought.
Speaker 4: He just screamed. He wants to kill you so, Mark,
Speaker 4: this is a.
Speaker 6: Dangerous weapon I'm holding though, I mean his machete exactly
Speaker 6: if you had a a schetty, I wouldn't shoot a guy.
Speaker 6: I think that's freed him up with a bat.
Speaker 7: Cops are either really good or really bad, because that
Speaker 7: kind of power corrupts you or it either corrupts you
Speaker 7: or it makes you respect life and people and right things.
Speaker 4: I think I think it goes one way or the other.
Speaker 6: Yeah. Probably, I was just really confronted by it. I
Speaker 6: did not I did not want to ever shoot somebody anyway.
Speaker 6: But the shows were fun, and uh, what did you do?
Speaker 4: I haven't done much.
Speaker 7: I helped, uh work on Kurt Browneler's he did his
Speaker 7: talk show pilot okay for Comedy Central, and I wrote
Speaker 7: a couple jokes for that and just basically kind of
Speaker 7: just hung out with my friends because it was.
Speaker 4: All my friends that were working on it terrific. So
Speaker 4: I just went and pitched in. And that's about it.
Speaker 6: That sounds great? Was it? Do you think it was
Speaker 6: a good pilot.
Speaker 4: I think it's gonna be great. It's like The The
Speaker 4: Daily Show but.
Speaker 6: For odd News okay.
Speaker 7: And I just think that he's if like for someone
Speaker 7: to play a fake newscaster.
Speaker 4: He's such a good person.
Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah, he is good.
Speaker 7: And he's super funny, and we wrote some pretty hilarious stuff.
Speaker 7: They wrote a ton of great stuff, So I think
Speaker 7: you should be good.
Speaker 6: That sounds great. Yeah, send me a copy. I'll give
Speaker 6: my judgment.
Speaker 4: We'll just see.
Speaker 6: Have you ever been as hungry as I am right now?
Speaker 4: Never? Probably?
Speaker 6: Ever? I am the hungriest.
Speaker 4: Just like the bowling alley. Oh, it says restaurant.
Speaker 6: I kind of do want to go the bowling alley.
Speaker 6: But we don't have to have eating be part of
Speaker 6: our thing. We could.
Speaker 4: I mean, if we had a bowling podcast and it
Speaker 4: was so.
Speaker 6: Loud and we yeah we did, we had to do
Speaker 6: it down by the pins where that noise was just
Speaker 6: the worst.
Speaker 7: Just it was just more for people who had a
Speaker 7: fetish about listening to bowling.
Speaker 6: It is you know what, I wouldn't say, fat ash.
Speaker 6: It doesn't induce boners. But I do like the sound
Speaker 6: of bowling. It's comforting.
Speaker 4: I do too. Yeah, I love bowling. It's really nice.
Speaker 7: It's like it's almost like the ocean, like it just
Speaker 7: the sound keeps coming m hm until.
Speaker 6: The until the ocean doesn't close at twelve am.
Speaker 4: No, that's as far as I'm just.
Speaker 6: I thought you made a comparison. I thought i'd show
Speaker 6: how the ocean and a bowling allergy are kind of different.
Speaker 6: I mean, I.
Speaker 7: Feel like we're not an arguing podcast, but that's fine.
Speaker 7: I bet you there are if we're going to argue
Speaker 7: with each other. I bet you there are people that
Speaker 7: get boners from.
Speaker 6: Bowling zone none. I think that that would be It
Speaker 6: would have to you. They would have to imagine a visual.
Speaker 6: Just the audio alone would not induced by.
Speaker 4: And I know what listeners prove us right or wrong.
Speaker 6: If you have forge of footage of you listening to
Speaker 6: only the audio of bowling.
Speaker 4: If you develop hot bowlers only audio.
Speaker 6: Yes, we all know the professional athletes of all types,
Speaker 6: including bowlers. We're not saying conjure them. Just the audio.
Speaker 6: Film yourself with a boner listening to it, and we
Speaker 6: will send you. Uh. We we have to make T shirts.
Speaker 6: I'm gonna work on that. We're gonna have T shirts.
Speaker 4: What our T shirts?
Speaker 6: I owe you for a T shirt, T shirt, T
Speaker 6: shoots shoots. If you got to send your boner picks,
Speaker 6: please don't send your boner picks.
Speaker 4: Yeah, we don't want those.
Speaker 7: But what if our T shirt is of uh in
Speaker 7: the bowling back in the background bowling, and then the
Speaker 7: foreground a big boner.
Speaker 4: Just think if something that would.
Speaker 6: Be a bowling boner. I was going to do a
Speaker 6: T shirt of a slice of pizza with sunglasses surfing,
Speaker 6: but a boner bowling. Let us go boner bowling.
Speaker 4: Yeah, people bowling down boners.
Speaker 6: M h, I like it. I mean there's gutter balls.
Speaker 4: In the worst episode ever.
Speaker 6: No, no, I wouldn't say that, not yet anyway. Anyway,
Speaker 6: I apologize. I just think that because I have the
Speaker 6: ability to make boners that I my opinion. I accept
Speaker 6: that you think that some people do get them from bowling.
Speaker 6: End of argument.
Speaker 4: I believe.
Speaker 6: Let's be friends again.
Speaker 7: Okay, this is a good plan because I just believe
Speaker 7: that anything.
Speaker 4: Can give people boy and girl boners.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 4: Just an amazing array of things that people.
Speaker 6: Senses, just different senses that you can tap in. For some,
Speaker 6: it's audio for some, For none, it's this podcast that's far.
Speaker 6: I find that it's you know, we've had some homers.
Speaker 6: Let's just review some of the best step Adomian episode
Speaker 6: that Todd Barry episode of the Huntsburger episode. Those are great.
Speaker 6: Stop listening to this one right now, we have nothing
Speaker 6: we've heard of one of those.
Speaker 7: Leave wherever you are, just run into the street and
Speaker 7: away from your own ear.
Speaker 6: Take this one, throw it against the wall and pick
Speaker 6: up the Toddglass episode and then go to iTunes and
Speaker 6: Raid as well. Let's go straight ahead and we'll go
Speaker 6: to that Swingers. Okay, I do enjoy it there at
Speaker 6: which point we can they not all of our podcast
Speaker 6: scaren have to be a full hour, thank god.
Speaker 7: Right, there's some somebody I like to immediately picture someone
Speaker 7: sitting at work and this is the podcast that gets
Speaker 7: them through their day and they just start crying because
Speaker 7: it's not going to.
Speaker 6: Be a right hour and they have just an hour break.
Speaker 6: And it's based on their bosses like well, shorter podcast,
Speaker 6: Shorter Break, Get back to work with your little fingers,
Speaker 6: Stay Law. It's podcast State Law points to a sign
Speaker 6: made of crayon.
Speaker 4: That's because they work in a crown factory.
Speaker 6: Yeah, exactly. Some of the if you work at a
Speaker 6: crayon factory with an angry slave driver of a boss
Speaker 6: who only lets you have breaks. As long as a
Speaker 6: podcast lasts and you listen to our podcast, I apologize
Speaker 6: that you're not getting your full hour.
Speaker 7: Yeah, we're really sorry to you for all the reasons
Speaker 7: that christ and.
Speaker 6: I haven't even mentioned. I just now noticed we don't
Speaker 6: have a guest.
Speaker 4: I know you're the guest because you're the comedian.
Speaker 6: Road It's gonna have, it's gonna look it. Usually it
Speaker 6: says the name of our podcast, and then there's a
Speaker 6: colon and then a name. But I'll I guess I'll
Speaker 6: just name my name.
Speaker 7: Yeah, let's put your name, and then here I'll start
Speaker 7: asking you a real guesty question. Okay, shoot, what let's
Speaker 7: do a highlights low lights of like your favorite.
Speaker 4: Moment from the a comedy festival, like just.
Speaker 7: A drunken picture that you took with your mind and
Speaker 7: it's still in there, or a moment where some hilarious
Speaker 7: laughter kicked up because in great mya.
Speaker 4: Okay, I was trying to talk you into it.
Speaker 6: Thinking I interrupted because I was already sold. Stop talking
Speaker 6: right now because I'm on board.
Speaker 4: Stop spreading the news.
Speaker 6: I'm leaving right now. Today. I went I think the
Speaker 6: best times we're in the van, just riffing with comics.
Speaker 6: I forgot how much fun, and it helped reinforce that
Speaker 6: our podcast is genius, because every time we were in
Speaker 6: that van, every one of the comics was like, God,
Speaker 6: this should be the show. Yeah, I'm like, that is
Speaker 6: my show. Yeah, And so it was I'm trying to
Speaker 6: think of a specific moment.
Speaker 4: Well, I get what you mean.
Speaker 7: Those are those moments where it's it's all kind of
Speaker 7: strung together, but then someone thinks of the best, Right.
Speaker 7: It's that kind of thing where like funny, funny, funny,
Speaker 7: Oh my god.
Speaker 4: They took it to a different place.
Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah, it was I'm trying to think of Well,
Speaker 6: I do recall Patrick Keane. We were driving and he
Speaker 6: he saw something. It just saw the way a storefront
Speaker 6: was laid out, and he said, oh my god, look
Speaker 6: at the windows on that and I said, yeah, they
Speaker 6: were weird windows. Also, lower your goddamn boys and everyone
Speaker 6: we all laughed so hard. And it feels good to
Speaker 6: make a bunch of comedians laugh, yes, And I find
Speaker 6: that in a car, making people laugh is my comfort
Speaker 6: zone more so than on stage. Unfortunately, if that contest
Speaker 6: that we had was judged in the car, I would
Speaker 6: have taken the three thousand dollars.
Speaker 4: So was it three thousand dollars?
Speaker 6: Yeah?
Speaker 4: Where'd they get that money?
Speaker 6: I don't know. It was a lot of local sponsoring,
Speaker 6: like they we had activity, you know, horseback riding, which
Speaker 6: didn't the guy actually showed up with a gun and
Speaker 6: said get off my property. That's maybe I wasn't there
Speaker 6: for that.
Speaker 4: I had had that's not your highlight, No, I.
Speaker 6: Because I wasn't part of that. I wasn't in that group.
Speaker 6: But yeah, he's And then he peeled off and kicked
Speaker 6: gravel on all the comedians. Yes, like so apparently the
Speaker 6: guy's son was the one that said, yeah, you can
Speaker 6: come ride horses, and they forgot to check back with him.
Speaker 6: I don't know, Dad, Shooting guns was not my favorite thing,
Speaker 6: although I needed to do that and I needed to
Speaker 6: know that I so I can have more opinions about
Speaker 6: that when I talked to people.
Speaker 4: Sure, it's good.
Speaker 7: Sometimes it's good to have negative experiences just so you
Speaker 7: know what you don't like.
Speaker 6: I definitely, I don't know. I just absolutely didn't like
Speaker 6: the way it felt and it looked made me. The
Speaker 6: gun was so powerful I could taste metal in my
Speaker 6: mouth and my elbow is sore from holding a handgun.
Speaker 6: And shooting it.
Speaker 4: What was it a fucking musket?
Speaker 6: They had some that were like crazy, like a handgun
Speaker 6: that shoots shotgun shells, and it was so loud and
Speaker 6: powerful that I'm like, I'm not gonna I am scared
Speaker 6: of it, and I do not want even I don't
Speaker 6: want to hold it. I was jumping just because. And
Speaker 6: then when I held I held the gun, I heard
Speaker 6: all the comics there watching through the window behind me,
Speaker 6: all laughing because of how much my hand was shaking. Oh,
Speaker 6: we're laughing at me. And I'm like, but I And
Speaker 6: then uh, there's like this little firecracker girl that was
Speaker 6: she was terrifically and she picked up the assault rifle
Speaker 6: and just shot it like a totally I guess she
Speaker 6: was in the military at some point. And then I come,
Speaker 6: I have my little gun, and I'm like quivering in
Speaker 6: the wind.
Speaker 4: Wait was the Firecracker girl a comic?
Speaker 6: Yes?
Speaker 4: It wasn't just some no.
Speaker 8: No.
Speaker 6: I can't remember her last name, but I liked her
Speaker 6: a lot, and I wish I could remember her name.
Speaker 6: But it was Leah and she was terrific, you'll remember.
Speaker 8: And that was the highlights and low lights Big Sky
Speaker 8: Comedy twenty fourteen, Guns are scary, sponsored by guns being scary?
Speaker 6: What is your next generic interview? Why is that person
Speaker 6: that is a curious resting place?
Speaker 7: Yeah, there's been a lot of curb always is I've seen.
Speaker 4: Yeah, just back right out and get a longer tram.
Speaker 6: Oh, I do not like. I hope they are having
Speaker 6: fun on their vacation, but the driver of that luxurious
Speaker 6: retirement vehicle really needs to mind his back bumper.
Speaker 7: He was just backing it out onto Lincoln like it
Speaker 7: was anybody's game now.
Speaker 6: And if there was a cartoon of like a silhouette
Speaker 6: of a guy sleeping in the street from the fifties,
Speaker 6: like a cartoon version, maybe a defensive cartoon of homeless
Speaker 6: guy and in sensitive fun, that would have been the guy. Well,
Speaker 6: you know, he was hunched over.
Speaker 4: He was on the curve. He wasn't like back against
Speaker 4: a wall, like relaxing. It was like he was on
Speaker 4: the curve crying about his high school girlfriend.
Speaker 6: Right, there's extra tragedy and high school was so long
Speaker 6: ago for him.
Speaker 7: Oh my god, so it's more to cry about. Yeah,
Speaker 7: miss is it? He wants to go back?
Speaker 6: He's had no high school girlfriend since or girls it's
Speaker 6: more appropriate age. Uh.
Speaker 7: I have noticed being out here on the West Side,
Speaker 7: lots of wandering wanderers. Like when I stopped by your apartment,
Speaker 7: there was a girl that was walking no shoes, couldn't
Speaker 7: tell how she looked like she could be fifty eight
Speaker 7: or twelve, sure, hippie ish, clearly.
Speaker 4: On a lot of drugs, and she was where.
Speaker 7: I just stayed in my car and waited for her
Speaker 7: to wander by so I didn't have to have a
Speaker 7: weird experience with her. And then I saw like four
Speaker 7: more people like that on my way to drive to
Speaker 7: the airport.
Speaker 6: Wow.
Speaker 4: I don't know if it's just the evening or is
Speaker 4: it the neighborhood.
Speaker 6: Is there a certain type of moon out that gives
Speaker 6: everyone moon fever?
Speaker 4: It's leftover blood moon residuals.
Speaker 6: Oh, leftover moon platelets, residual moon splatter.
Speaker 4: Maybe they have some kind of a moon hemophilia.
Speaker 6: I gotta get a good read on this moon blood splatter,
Speaker 6: blood moon splatter.
Speaker 4: Oh, there's some on the ceiling that means the gun
Speaker 4: was days in Gunward.
Speaker 6: Don't tell me my job. I'm the blood splatter technician
Speaker 6: on this prec In this yes and scene, blood Moon
Speaker 6: Cops episode one, never to have an episode two. But yeah,
Speaker 6: I'm trying to think of what other There was just
Speaker 6: so many memories, so many enjoyable things.
Speaker 4: I saw your picture of you posing at the gun place.
Speaker 6: Yeah, that was I should have made taken more photos.
Speaker 4: It's always sorry to right in the middle of your talking.
Speaker 6: Oh it's doing great. Yeah, yeah, So if we take
Speaker 6: it right here on Broadway, we can go behind these
Speaker 6: Swingers establishment, and there are parking spaces there that a
Speaker 6: lot of people don't know about it, and hopefully they don't.
Speaker 6: They've already turned off this episode, so they do not
Speaker 6: know my little secret. The one thing about this But
Speaker 6: there's a few things that made this great. They made
Speaker 6: us stay with roommates, yes, which wasn't the best, but
Speaker 6: you did end up bonding with it. You couldn't get
Speaker 6: away from everyone. And if I'm in, then back here.
Speaker 6: And if I am, you know, tired of being around people,
Speaker 6: or I think I'm someone that's gotten too used to
Speaker 6: being lonely. And most people, you know, they are forced
Speaker 6: at a job or something, have to be around people.
Speaker 6: And this forced all of us comics to be around
Speaker 6: throughout the day. We woke up every meal was taken
Speaker 6: care of Lucas Seeley, the guy that put the thing together.
Speaker 6: His parents own a restaurant. She's an amazing cook. She
Speaker 6: made us meals and we would have like an event
Speaker 6: and then we go we went to the go kart
Speaker 6: place and the food was taken there and so we
Speaker 6: ate at the go kart place. Things like that was
Speaker 6: really cool. And then industry. There are really industry people
Speaker 6: at like Bridgetown or these other fun festivals that are
Speaker 6: really great, and if they are they disappear after the show.
Speaker 6: They don't. At this they were kind of forced to
Speaker 6: hang out with us and we became friends with like,
Speaker 6: you know, these nice casting people and Aaron from the
Speaker 6: Improv or from Levity and some Comedy Central folks were there.
Speaker 6: He invited all this industry and they just were and
Speaker 6: they totally came and had fun and hung out and
Speaker 6: that's awesome, and judged the contest. You know, there was
Speaker 6: like twelve industry judges that he got to fly to Montana.
Speaker 4: Well, I mean, at the end of the day, they
Speaker 4: want to like have fun, hang out too.
Speaker 6: They're humans, it turns.
Speaker 7: Out, and you know, they probably if they're in the
Speaker 7: comedy realm. Then it's because they love it and they're
Speaker 7: truly fans, so they want to be like participating.
Speaker 4: It's so easy to see.
Speaker 7: Those people as like either the enemy or something to
Speaker 7: like aspire up to. But the truth of it is
Speaker 7: everybody just wants. People are just trying to find the
Speaker 7: person that's going to make them money. It's not like
Speaker 7: personal or right. It shouldn't be elitist or whatever. It's
Speaker 7: just kind of like, yeah, let's let's make something that
Speaker 7: you will be a reliable resource within, right.
Speaker 6: Yeah, And they did. They did give some like industry panels,
Speaker 6: and we listen to them, and too many times I
Speaker 6: was afraid they did bring up, you know, being able
Speaker 6: to see if someone will make money or put butts
Speaker 6: and seats or it's marketable and something, and I'm like, oh,
Speaker 6: I bet I'm not that person.
Speaker 4: Oh well, oh that's not true.
Speaker 6: No, it isn't true. That's just a stinking thinking that
Speaker 6: I am going on to my own dumb little noodle.
Speaker 4: Let's get rid of that stinking thinking.
Speaker 6: Yeah, knocking, little little negativity knocking around, and I want
Speaker 6: to kick it out my ear hole.
Speaker 7: We've already talked about your wonderful retro thirties hair. Yeah,
Speaker 7: I mean there's now Oh my god, it's from the seventies.
Speaker 6: Yeah, now, I look, my hair grew over the weekend.
Speaker 6: Maybe it's that mountain air. You know what's better than
Speaker 6: yawning and the mic is burping midward. I'm not gonna
Speaker 6: let that one slide.
Speaker 4: You've got to call that shit out.
Speaker 6: Uh, you know what, Karen, I'm so hungry.
Speaker 7: Wait before we go, please name your best friend from
Speaker 7: the from the festival.
Speaker 4: Who's your best friend?
Speaker 6: I really well. On the way home. I became very
Speaker 6: good friends with Tony Baker. He's a trap comedian. I
Speaker 6: knew him from last comic standing, but I never see him.
Speaker 6: I think he's probably on the road or at the
Speaker 6: comedy store all the time. But he's a He's a
Speaker 6: sweet guy and super funny. And I went into it
Speaker 6: really liking Patrick Keane a lot, and I even more
Speaker 6: so now. He just has He had the best bits
Speaker 6: off stage that all the comics just thought he was
Speaker 6: the best.
Speaker 7: He was Was it your night or Henry Phillips Knight
Speaker 7: that he did?
Speaker 4: When I did it? Do you remember I do not
Speaker 4: at the improv, I do not show together. He was
Speaker 4: so funny, and I'd never seen him before, and it
Speaker 4: was like, I just love that's just.
Speaker 6: His whole yeah, all of his throwaway you guys. I
Speaker 6: got to get out of here. I got to wake
Speaker 6: up late tomorrow. But I and he didn't do this joke.
Speaker 6: But when another Patrick Kane joke is, hey, uh just
Speaker 6: got my head shots back and it looks like I'm
Speaker 6: gonna be a writer, It's like the best joke ever.
Speaker 6: He had so many great bits. And the one thing
Speaker 6: I didn't like about the festival that if I can
Speaker 6: allow them to hear some constructive criticism.
Speaker 4: There's upward feedback.
Speaker 6: Two teams, so each team without seeing each other. We
Speaker 6: are at different venues, so we only saw the finalists
Speaker 6: from the other team. I didn't see, you know, like
Speaker 6: he did the comics in this thing.
Speaker 4: How many comics were there? Would you say?
Speaker 6: I think total? There's twenty six in the contest and
Speaker 6: then there you know top three, Hey, hey, hey, I
Speaker 6: was at a big theater.
Speaker 4: Hey hey, top three.
Speaker 6: Ah, but I had a good time.
Speaker 7: I knew you would. I knew you would be a
Speaker 7: finalist for sure.
Speaker 6: I was hoping I had won, but I you know,
Speaker 6: the guy that won it totally made sense. The guy
Speaker 6: got second totally made sense. They were great, and I
Speaker 6: was extra quirky and silly. But and I know that
Speaker 6: the judges like me. But I think the crowd was like, oh,
Speaker 6: he's he's really a weird little bird, isn't he Like
Speaker 6: I didn't quite you know, relate to the audience. And
Speaker 6: I could have done things to have done that better.
Speaker 6: So it was a learning experience for me. I'm gonna
Speaker 6: write some more relationship bits. I got to have the
Speaker 6: relationship bits happen to me first, or I'll make them
Speaker 6: up all I'll just write them.
Speaker 7: No, they'll know if you lie. The audience always know
Speaker 7: when you're being sincere. They can smell it.
Speaker 6: I can smell it like a stink.
Speaker 7: But that would be funny to just start writing like
Speaker 7: your ex wife jokes or something that has nothing to
Speaker 7: do with you whatsoever.
Speaker 6: Yeah, that's what That's what Andy Kindler was saying, Like
Speaker 6: I I wish I had my ex wife jokes, but
Speaker 6: I love my wife and I want to stay Mary Door,
Speaker 6: so I can't have those jobs.
Speaker 4: I'm stealing from our own podcasts.
Speaker 6: No, it's quite all right. You're stealing from a person
Speaker 6: that was on our podcast. It's different and worse.
Speaker 7: I'm stealing an idea from Andy, and I'm giving it
Speaker 7: to you like a gift.
Speaker 6: You know what I'm going to steal from many is
Speaker 6: the joke that he came up with. Oh, it's probably
Speaker 6: a joke because it's like, uh, well, no, we were
Speaker 6: workshopping at where he goes. Uh, people in the movie
Speaker 6: industry come to my shows to record room tone. I
Speaker 6: think that was I don't know. Maybe I said it wrong.
Speaker 6: He said directors and producers come to my He said
Speaker 6: it wrong. Yeah, we were like producers. Have you ever
Speaker 6: been on a set?
Speaker 7: If I'm going to do a low light of this show,
Speaker 7: it would be when we started talking.
Speaker 4: About other episodes during this episode.
Speaker 6: I know it's a real and not even fondly. We're
Speaker 6: talking shit about past episodes that were better.
Speaker 4: I'm stealing.
Speaker 7: I'm forgetting things and then stealing them to tell you
Speaker 7: about them as if you weren't there.
Speaker 6: I don'tkay. I'm glad we did this because one we
Speaker 6: we have not skipped the Monday yet or an episode yet.
Speaker 6: We have to. We can't.
Speaker 4: We don't want to miss.
Speaker 6: This is for you, you people, if you've listened thus far.
Speaker 6: Our mission statement every Monday, well not it's Originally it
Speaker 6: was on Fridays, but we realized you maybe want to
Speaker 6: have it at the beginning of the week, so we
Speaker 6: change it. Plus it gives us the weekend to record.
Speaker 6: Every every week we want to have an episode even
Speaker 6: if it kills us. It will kill us if we
Speaker 6: can get in a wreck.
Speaker 4: So it's going to be very forced and difficult.
Speaker 7: Shoving it down, tell you about it aggressively and like
Speaker 7: a lot of gastro intestinal issues the whole time.
Speaker 6: Do you really think that, just just immediately the all
Speaker 6: time low, you must have the sho.
Speaker 4: You didn't even I didn't.
Speaker 6: Want to do it. I only made that noise out
Speaker 6: of yes, and I knew it was a horrible idea.
Speaker 6: I didn't know why you even said gas show intestinal issues.
Speaker 4: Because I'm forcing it too. That's what we're doing.
Speaker 6: It gives you the farts to force it.
Speaker 4: The theme is forcing forcing it real quick. Before we go,
Speaker 4: I saw your apartment. Oh yeah, because I had to
Speaker 4: pick up the.
Speaker 6: It is it? What do you think of it? Well?
Speaker 4: I noticed there was a lot of leather. There's a
Speaker 4: lot of there's a big leather pouse and a big
Speaker 4: leather chair.
Speaker 6: Hey, daddy likes his leather. I'm a bit of a
Speaker 6: leather daddy. It was, but.
Speaker 4: It's very nice. It's like it's like small, but like
Speaker 4: it's very cozy.
Speaker 6: It's a beach bungalow.
Speaker 4: Yes, it really is.
Speaker 7: And as I was walking up, because you gave me
Speaker 7: all those directions of how to find the key of
Speaker 7: those different things that were hidden, and I was like, great,
Speaker 7: I'll never find it, here comes Nate Craig walking up.
Speaker 4: Just swam in the ocean.
Speaker 6: He does that night.
Speaker 4: That's crazy.
Speaker 6: But he swims in the ocean, and then he walks
Speaker 6: back to our place in the center of the street,
Speaker 6: dripping wet, with a look of determination on his face
Speaker 6: that could be misread I think as a murderer walking back.
Speaker 4: He has a murderer.
Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah, it's that widow speak, the kid from the Monsters.
Speaker 6: I believe Robert Blake. That widow speak means you, well,
Speaker 6: it doesn't mean anything.
Speaker 4: It's some. It often means that you're like a heart
Speaker 4: throb from the fifties.
Speaker 6: He's he's a handsome guy.
Speaker 7: He looks a handsome guy a fifties Uh, you know,
Speaker 7: better than Tony Curtis.
Speaker 6: He's an actor too. We got to get my roommate,
Speaker 6: Nate Craig in the movies.
Speaker 4: Craig, Nate Craig, Nate Ken Great.
Speaker 6: But maybe you know he's spending all his goddamn time
Speaker 6: in the ocean. He should be out auditioning late on
Speaker 6: a Sunday.
Speaker 7: Hold on, I've got a pitch for you late Sunday
Speaker 7: night auditions.
Speaker 4: Here's the pitch Splash too.
Speaker 7: This time it's a guy, uh, the Madison, Madison's son. Yeah,
Speaker 7: he's a murman and he come. He washes up onto
Speaker 7: the Sure Santa Monica and walks up the street.
Speaker 6: He's Darrealhannah's son. Okay, I can't believe you remembered her
Speaker 6: name was Madison, but keep going.
Speaker 4: I love it's a great film. They named her after
Speaker 4: the streets.
Speaker 7: Yes, I remember she made all that really high pitched
Speaker 7: noise and all yes broke.
Speaker 6: I mean with the shell on it like.
Speaker 4: It was so similar to the pretty Woman lobster scene and.
Speaker 6: Yet totally different. Yeah, more comedic, more comedic.
Speaker 4: So that's what we'll do. We will write Splash two
Speaker 4: for Nate Craig.
Speaker 6: Yeah, wu wud I do want to do a Merman
Speaker 6: video with him because he loves the ocean so damn much.
Speaker 6: He's already he's already done the research.
Speaker 4: You know what.
Speaker 7: He should be the foul mouth Mrman, so you know,
Speaker 7: like usually and then when the people have mermaid fantasies,
Speaker 7: it's like, oh, they come up and they they try
Speaker 7: to lure you onto the rocks or they're whatever, the
Speaker 7: siren song. But instead he pops up and it's like
Speaker 7: a murman and he has a pukahell necklace, and everyone's
Speaker 7: all excited and he's like, get the fuck out of here,
Speaker 7: stuff like.
Speaker 6: That, get out of my waves?
Speaker 4: Hey did you put the soil over here?
Speaker 7: Or he's like the murman, I wonder which of us
Speaker 7: belongs here?
Speaker 6: I have a fish lower body and you have legs.
Speaker 6: Get the fuck off my waves.
Speaker 4: Sharks attack yeah, oh yeah, oh you're right.
Speaker 6: He should. He should only be able to like get shut.
Speaker 6: I think there we should turn this to a drama,
Speaker 6: because that's some intense ship. If you could, if you
Speaker 6: could summon sharks and wield them as a weapon, you
Speaker 6: start out.
Speaker 7: As splash and people will be like, oh, this is great.
Speaker 6: It's a romantic romp comedy.
Speaker 7: He gonna do with lobster. This is gonna be hilarious.
Speaker 7: And then a shark attack. Yeah, like commanded shark attack
Speaker 7: on children.
Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah, so dramatic, so dramatic. I don't children don't
Speaker 6: know that it should be children. I think it should
Speaker 6: be school contenting adults, adults that were like, yes, I'd
Speaker 6: like to be killed by a shark.
Speaker 4: Six children a water skiing.
Speaker 6: Oh that's it's terrible. You've made a depressing film.
Speaker 4: I don't care that. I'm an all toour and this
Speaker 4: is my art. I had to make it because that's
Speaker 4: what's inside me.
Speaker 6: Hey, express yourself. Come on, girls, I done about it. Good.
Speaker 6: I have you listened to a Madonna song? Like she
Speaker 6: was the worst singer. She could sing, she can't sing still, No,
Speaker 6: she's I do like her. I do appreciate her. I don't.
Speaker 6: I won't want to take away her diva status.
Speaker 7: It's almost more credit to her because she's like the
Speaker 7: number one pop over a couple time, and.
Speaker 4: She's one of the worst singers.
Speaker 7: But the reason I love that because I was a
Speaker 7: total Madonna. I was eleven when like early on Lucky
Speaker 7: Star came out.
Speaker 4: I was there for the beginning.
Speaker 6: Primadonna and.
Speaker 4: Uh the rea. I loved her because I could sing
Speaker 4: like her, because it was like you, and.
Speaker 7: It was like the most it was like, yeah, it
Speaker 7: was a twelve year old girl you like, Yes, this
Speaker 7: is how.
Speaker 4: I really feel.
Speaker 7: Like how whiny and like you don't want to You
Speaker 7: don't want to sing a pretty song to like Laura
Speaker 7: boy to you, It's like you're trying to complain to him.
Speaker 6: Yeah, you want to keep it above your diaphragm.
Speaker 7: Too, Yeah, just up in the right.
Speaker 6: Nasal singing. Speaking of bull hot Bulls of Porridge, I
Speaker 6: will murder somebody if I do not have food soon.
Speaker 4: Let's go get it.
Speaker 6: I'm gonna get some food. Thank you for picking me up,
Speaker 6: my pleasure.
Speaker 4: It was fun.
Speaker 6: It's good to see you and and then I'll see
Speaker 6: you next week.
Speaker 4: Thanks for listening.
Speaker 6: Listen to this is Do you need a ride? You've
Speaker 6: been listening to d Y n A R.
Speaker 1: By leaving you wanna way back?
Speaker 4: Either way?
Speaker 1: We want to be there.
Speaker 2: Doesn't matter how much baggage you time and turn and gay.
Speaker 3: We want to send you off inside. We want to
Speaker 3: welcome you back home.
Speaker 1: Tell us all about it.
Speaker 4: We scared her?
Speaker 1: Was it fine?
Speaker 2: Now?
Speaker 1: Porn do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?
Speaker 1: Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?
Speaker 1: Do you need to ride? Do you need ride? Do
Speaker 1: you need to ride? Do you need
Speaker 6: With Karen and Chris