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Speaker 1: Hey, this is Sam. This is a John your og

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Speaker 1: Okay Storytime podcast. Oh and we got some great stories

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Speaker 1: coming up.

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Speaker 2: Before that, we have a quick two minute break from

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Speaker 2: the sponsors that keep the show alit.

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Speaker 3: My fiance crossed the line with my family, so I

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Speaker 3: told him it was over between us.

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Speaker 4: Looks like you went to North Korea when you're supposed

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Speaker 4: to say in South Korea.

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Speaker 3: My fiance, thirty male, recently bought a house and I,

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Speaker 3: twenty eight female, moved in with him. Oh, the house

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Speaker 3: is in his name only, but our arrangement was that

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Speaker 3: he paid the mortgage and I pay all the utilities

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Speaker 3: and groceries. He has been trying to get me to

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Speaker 3: see the home as ours, but I still consider it

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Speaker 3: his since my name is nowhere on the mortgage or

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Speaker 3: deed or even the rental agreement, and he has been

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Speaker 3: taking care of all the home ownership expenses. It's kind

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Speaker 3: of respectful. By the way. This comes from you slash

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Speaker 3: ok b six zero two four on the r slash

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Speaker 3: Okay story Times subbreaddit I originally waited for us to

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Speaker 3: buy a home together after getting married, but our leases

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Speaker 3: were almost up and he had the money for a

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Speaker 3: house and didn't want to keep renting any longer than necessary,

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Speaker 3: so now seemed like the best time. I was okay

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Speaker 3: with this, since I wasn't in a financial position yet

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Speaker 3: to help put down money on a new home. Either way,

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Speaker 3: and think our current arrangement is more than fair. Anyways,

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Speaker 3: my family was super excited when they heard that he

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Speaker 3: bought a place and that we would be moving to

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Speaker 3: a house instead of continuing to live in our small apartments.

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Speaker 3: Let's go okay. They love him like a son and

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Speaker 3: we're so happy about him finally becoming a homeowner. My

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Speaker 3: mom and her sister, my aunt, asked if they could

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Speaker 3: come visit us for the fourth of July holiday since

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Speaker 3: they were off and wanted to see the new place.

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Speaker 3: They live about three hours away and wanted to take

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Speaker 3: the train. I initially told them no since it was

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Speaker 3: so close to the time we were finishing the home,

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Speaker 3: but when my fiance heard about it, he assured me

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Speaker 3: it would be okay and he was happy to have

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Speaker 3: them visit. He loves my aunt's cooking and she loves

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Speaker 3: to cook for people, so he thought it would be

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Speaker 3: great to have her come cook and we would have

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Speaker 3: our place ready for them by then. We bought all

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Speaker 3: the furniture we needed, beds for the guest rooms, et cetera.

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Speaker 3: His sister and her kids were also going to be

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Speaker 3: in town and would be visiting us, so it was

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Speaker 3: going to be nice having everyone meet and spend the

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Speaker 3: day together. I was really looking forward to it and

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Speaker 3: even bought a new grill. He bought fireworks to shoot

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Speaker 3: off with the kids. It was supposed to be a

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Speaker 3: fun weekend and our first time hosting as a couple.

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Speaker 3: At first, everything was going well and everyone was getting along.

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Speaker 3: My mom and aunt were cooking while his sister was

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Speaker 3: just hanging out talking and the kids were watching TV.

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Speaker 3: My mom started washing a dish and I mentioned to

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Speaker 3: her not to use the sponge to clean the counters,

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Speaker 3: because my fiance doesn't like that, something about bacteria spreading

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Speaker 3: from the sponge to the counter. We clean our counters

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Speaker 3: with sponges back home. I grew up doing it this way,

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Speaker 3: so I figured i'd tell her beforehand so she wouldn't

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Speaker 3: get upset. He decided to make this a topic of

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Speaker 3: conversation slash debate, and asked his sister for her thoughts

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Speaker 3: on this. It seems like he wanted to prove he

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Speaker 3: was right about the bacteria thing, since it was something

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Speaker 3: we had argued about way back when I washed dishes

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Speaker 3: at his apartment for the first time.

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Speaker 4: Okay, just like a little like, you know, what, do

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Speaker 4: you think she's got a big deal?

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Speaker 3: Something tells me it is. I had long ago conceded

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Speaker 3: he was right and stopped using the sponge on the counters.

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Speaker 3: His sister disagreed with his logic, though, and pointed out

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Speaker 3: that the sponge in the sink is collecting bacteria either way,

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Speaker 3: and he's going to wash another dish with it and

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Speaker 3: spread the bacteria to the dishes that he eats with,

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Speaker 3: So his logic about its spreading to the counter didn't

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Speaker 3: make too much sense unless he's replacing the sponge after

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Speaker 3: every use. It's getting pretty serious right now.

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Speaker 4: That was very logical technicalities here.

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Speaker 3: Very serious sponge topics. He proceeded to pull up CDC

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Speaker 3: articles and try to prove his point, but her logic

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Speaker 3: also made sense. She didn't think it was a hills

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Speaker 3: and teased him about being a psycho over the bacteria

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Speaker 3: sponge thing. He finally dropped it and we started talking

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Speaker 3: about other things. I should mention that his new home

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Speaker 3: has quartz counters, and he made it known when we

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Speaker 3: moved in that I definitely couldn't use a sponge since

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Speaker 3: he says it'll damage the stone, so the whole bacteria

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Speaker 3: to bait was pointless. Anyways, we were talking about the

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Speaker 3: house and I brought up that he has been very

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Speaker 3: careful with things in the new house and joked that

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Speaker 3: he has even been waking up at four am to

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Speaker 3: trim hedges in the front lawn like a psycho. Aw

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Speaker 3: he laughed, but I later learned he took offense to

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Speaker 3: my comment. My mom made a joke at some point

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Speaker 3: about him being quite particular about his new house and

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Speaker 3: laughed along with my aunt. Prior to this, he had

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Speaker 3: already joked around with her through the security cameras when

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Speaker 3: she was outside, by scaring her and telling her to

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Speaker 3: wipe her feet before coming in. He thought it was

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Speaker 3: funny to joke around with her like that. I knew

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Speaker 3: there was an element of truth to his joking, but

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Speaker 3: my mom took it in good fun though, since she

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Speaker 3: also jokes around with him, so that was fun. I guess.

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Speaker 3: The kids were sitting alone on the couch and I

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Speaker 3: was trying to be a good host, so I asked

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Speaker 3: if they wanted anything to eat or drink, and his nephew,

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Speaker 3: seven years old, asked for a cookie, which I gave

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Speaker 3: him along with a napkin, and he went back to

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Speaker 3: the couch to continue watching TV with his brother. I

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Speaker 3: didn't see it, but apparently he dropped cookie crumbs on

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Speaker 3: the couch while he was eating obviously nonpurpose there, good kids.

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Speaker 3: My fiance saw the crumbs and immediately got upset and

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Speaker 3: started scolding him, and I stepped in and said it

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Speaker 3: was my fault and that I gave him the cookie.

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Speaker 4: Okay, I'm seeing a lot of little OCD activities here.

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Speaker 3: I think so. I think so. I honestly didn't see

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Speaker 3: a problem with this at the time, since we sometimes

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Speaker 3: eat dinner on the couch and the material is very

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Speaker 3: easy to clean, but I didn't say anything about that.

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Speaker 3: My fiance turned to me and started scolding me about

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Speaker 3: eating on the couch in front of everyone. Wow. I

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Speaker 3: apologized multiple times, and he kept going on about how

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Speaker 3: the couch is brand new and there shouldn't be any

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Speaker 3: eating on it and giving me stern looks like a

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Speaker 3: parent gives a child from your partner.

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Speaker 4: She's saying, I'm sorry that should be not in front

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Speaker 4: of everyone.

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Speaker 3: Especially not in front of everyone counterfare. Exactly after I

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Speaker 3: apologized for the third time, his sister stepped in and

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Speaker 3: was like, okay, bro, apologize, I think she gets it.

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Speaker 3: I was super embarrassed to have him schoold me like

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Speaker 3: that in front of everyone, but I shrugged it off

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Speaker 3: since I didn't want to kill the mood and make

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Speaker 3: it more awkward for our guests. We ended the night

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Speaker 3: by shooting off fireworks with his nephews and they went

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Speaker 3: home with his sister and we went to sleep. At

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Speaker 3: this point, my family got the sense that he was

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Speaker 3: very serious about the up keeper of the house and

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Speaker 3: started feeling uncomfortable and like they were intruding in his

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Speaker 3: very clean space. The next day, they spend most of

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Speaker 3: the day outside of the house, shopping and going for

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Speaker 3: walks so they wouldn't be in the way. My fiance

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Speaker 3: spent the day locked in his office working and playing

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Speaker 3: video games and didn't really come out. It wasn't like

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Speaker 3: my family to spend so much time away, as they

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Speaker 3: usually like talking and spending time together with us, so

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Speaker 3: at night I decided to go on one of their

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Speaker 3: walks with them and my mom mentioned how much she

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Speaker 3: loved the area where we lived due to all the parks,

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Speaker 3: and couldn't wait to come back, but for me not

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Speaker 3: to worry because she will rent a hotel room so

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Speaker 3: she doesn't bother us too much. I guess it broke

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Speaker 3: my heart a little hearing that, because as I realized

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Speaker 3: we'd made her and my aunt feel unwelcomed in our

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Speaker 3: own new home. She'd never come out right and say that,

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Speaker 3: but my mom and aunt have visited me in my

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Speaker 3: tiny apartment before, slept on air mattresses and not complained

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Speaker 3: once or say that they'd prefer to stay in a hotel.

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Speaker 3: So it's not about the space that they're giving to them.

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Speaker 3: It's about the pressure, the pressure of the space. When

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Speaker 3: we got back, it was late in my fiance it

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Speaker 3: was still in his office playing video game Ah, come on,

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Speaker 3: not the games, come on. I could tell he was

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Speaker 3: also being distant, and I didn't want to bother him,

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Speaker 3: so I went to bed. He joined me a few

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Speaker 3: minutes later and wanted to talk. He said he didn't

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Speaker 3: like the comment I made earlier calling him a psycho

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Speaker 3: in my story, in that he was also unhappy with

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Speaker 3: my family joking and laughing about him. He said he

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Speaker 3: felt disrespected in his own house. I felt like I

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Speaker 3: had so many things to say to him, but my

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Speaker 3: family was in the next room, and my fiance has

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Speaker 3: a tendency to yell whenever we have disagreements, so I

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Speaker 3: just apologized. That's a red flag.

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Speaker 4: That is a red flag.

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Speaker 3: You have a tendency to yell when you're upset. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: with disagreements. I told him I was telling a funny

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Speaker 3: story and completely joking and didn't mean it literally, but

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Speaker 3: I understood where he was coming from and it wouldn't

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Speaker 3: happen again. I also apologized on my family's behalf and

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Speaker 3: told him they didn't mean any harm, and from my perspective,

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Speaker 3: it looked like he was joking right back with them,

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Speaker 3: but I was sorry either way. I also pointed out

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Speaker 3: his sister had also called him the psycho and asked

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Speaker 3: if he was upset at her too. He said he

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Speaker 3: had already talked to his sister about that and she

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Speaker 3: apologized and they were good. My family was due to

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Speaker 3: stay with us for a couple more days, so after

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Speaker 3: I apologize for everything, I told him what my mom

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Speaker 3: said about staying in the hotel and how I can

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Speaker 3: tell that they're feeling unwelcomed, and how I broke my

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Speaker 3: heart that they feel that way in our home. I

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Speaker 3: told him that since he was also upset at them,

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Speaker 3: not to worry, that I would make sure we do

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Speaker 3: things outside the house for the next couple of days

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Speaker 3: so they stay out of his way until they leave,

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Speaker 3: even though I was apologizing to him and my heart

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Speaker 3: hurt from my family, and I decided in that moment

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Speaker 3: that I couldn't stay with someone that created such an

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Speaker 3: unwelcoming environment for our guests when they visit, especially not

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Speaker 3: my family, since we're very close and aside from him,

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Speaker 3: they're all I have.

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Speaker 4: This might be this is a good test trial, maybe

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Speaker 4: even couples counseling.

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Speaker 3: Maybe yeah, I mean conversation couples counseling. That seems like

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Speaker 3: it's always a good good way to start things out, because.

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Speaker 4: It seems like there's like a lot of work on

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Speaker 4: his end, like with uh OCD stuff, money to work

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Speaker 4: on the yelling part and taking jokes, like it.

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Speaker 3: Seems like he's telling her a lot of like what's

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Speaker 3: wrong with her, but it doesn't seem like she's telling

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Speaker 3: him like things that he's doing wrong.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, that makes sense.

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Speaker 3: It seems like it kind of is just going back

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Speaker 3: to her and not really She's not really being listened to.

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Speaker 3: They traveled three hours by train each way, super excited

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Speaker 3: to visit my aunt. Even visited a special supermarket to

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Speaker 3: get the right sausages to make his favorite dish, carrying

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Speaker 3: it in a cooler by train along with other goodies

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Speaker 3: that he would like. That is so generous. Wow, so

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Speaker 3: much effort. Yeah, carrying it with you for three hours,

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Speaker 3: the love and the thoughtfulness she put into it, I

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Speaker 3: don't know, it broke me a little bit. She's far

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Speaker 3: from a rich person, but extremely giving with all she has,

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Speaker 3: and I love her so much for that. She's always

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Speaker 3: getting his favorite foods and buying him little gifts whenever

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Speaker 3: we visit her. I felt so bad for putting her

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Speaker 3: in a situation like that. I don't think he ever

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Speaker 3: even offered them a water the whole time they were

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Speaker 3: with us. It truly felt like he cared more about

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Speaker 3: his precious new home than the people in it. Anyway.

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Speaker 3: I told him after I dropped them off at the

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Speaker 3: train station on their last day, that I would be

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Speaker 3: leaving two and that it was over between us.

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Speaker 4: Oh, my god, Wait, that's crazy.

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Speaker 3: That is crazy. He wouldn't need to worry about us

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Speaker 3: messing up his new place or disrespecting him in his

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Speaker 3: own home anymore. Over the next couple days, my family

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Speaker 3: since something was off, but all I told them is

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Speaker 3: that he he's mad at me over a disagreement. I

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Speaker 3: didn't tell them that he was also upset at them,

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Speaker 3: but they felt it.

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Speaker 4: And it's so hard to not have your partner be

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Speaker 4: about your family.

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Speaker 3: Right, especially a fiance, because and they're.

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Speaker 4: About to be your family too, And that's like, that's true,

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Speaker 4: that's a part of you, right.

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Speaker 3: You can't just separate your family, you know.

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Speaker 4: If you're on good terms. If you're not on good terms,

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Speaker 4: makes sense. But this seems like this family's on good terms.

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Speaker 3: You're a great terms and this is a stupid reason

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Speaker 3: to not be on good terms with them. He locked

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Speaker 3: himself up in his room for the rest of their stay,

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Speaker 3: and whenever he would come out, he completely ignored us,

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Speaker 3: wouldn't even look their way or mutter more than I

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Speaker 3: I think. He only came downstairs once while we were

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Speaker 3: watching TV to snatch the remote and turn the base

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Speaker 3: off because it was rumbling. His room upstairs. Oh my goodness,

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Speaker 3: it's like he's not even there in his own house

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Speaker 3: that they're staying in. So weird. He didn't say a

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Speaker 3: word to any of us as he did this. My

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Speaker 3: aunt was hurt since she really loves him like a

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Speaker 3: son and felt like she did something to upset him.

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Speaker 3: She's a very sentimental person, and my mom let it slip.

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Speaker 3: She was crying the night before, thinking he hates her.

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Speaker 3: Oh my my word, dude, that's so sad. She wasn't wrong.

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Speaker 3: He would either look down or look at us like

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Speaker 3: he hated us every time we passed him in the

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Speaker 3: hall or something. But I know that would have broken

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Speaker 3: her heart. So I told her that he was mad

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Speaker 3: at me for something and not to worry. That he

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Speaker 3: still loved her very much, but was just mad at me.

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Speaker 3: The heck, that's crazy. That's crazy, dude. What is this

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Speaker 3: check your attitude? Broke your attitude for real. By the way,

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Speaker 3: we still love you very much and you can join

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Speaker 3: us live on YouTube every weekday at three PMPST. Just

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Speaker 3: tap our profile. Happit. He didn't bother to come out

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Speaker 3: of his room and say goodbye. As they were leaving.

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Speaker 3: My aunt's last words to me at the train station.

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Speaker 3: Were for me to make up with him because he

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Speaker 3: loves the both of us so much. I've been feeling

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Speaker 3: so conflicted about all of this since, so please help

285
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Speaker 3: me out here read it. On one hand, I feel

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Speaker 3: bad for calling him a psycho, even if it was

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00:12:56,679 --> 00:12:59,000
Speaker 3: a joking manner. But on the other hand, I've been

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Speaker 3: feeling so bad for my family and how they must

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Speaker 3: have felt staying in a house with that kind of

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Speaker 3: energy when I know they had good intentions. So Reddit,

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Speaker 3: am I the ahole?

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Speaker 4: I am saying, that's a lot of work you're gonna

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Speaker 4: have to do. They've already asked to marry you. I

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Speaker 4: feel like you give you should like give them the

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Speaker 4: give them the right and like try to work it out,

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Speaker 4: try and see if it should do well.

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Speaker 3: At this point in the relationship, it's definitely worth like

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Speaker 3: talking about. Like she did say that she just left

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Speaker 3: pretty much.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, she's probably heated, probably irritated with her.

301
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Speaker 3: Yeah, and maybe she feels like she can't change him,

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Speaker 3: Like maybe there have been other things in the relationship

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Speaker 3: where she just knows that this isn't that he's like

304
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Speaker 3: stubborn with this kind of stuff, And so if she's

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Speaker 3: made the decision that she doesn't like it, there's no

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Speaker 3: point in even trying to change point, you know, So

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Speaker 3: maybe maybe that's where she's coming from.

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Speaker 4: I refuse to buy my sister's wedding cake after I

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Speaker 4: promised to because I can't afford it.

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Speaker 3: Don't let the meat cake.

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Speaker 4: My thirty one female sister thirty five female got married

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Speaker 4: a few weeks ago in a beautiful way that my

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Speaker 4: parents paid for. The wedding was held in a beautiful

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Speaker 4: state because it was close to my brother in law's

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Speaker 4: hometown where most of his large family lives, and it

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00:14:09,000 --> 00:14:13,120
Speaker 4: was also reasonable distance from herxton family. Mike'stended family lives

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Speaker 4: on the East Coast. We live in the Midwest. By

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Speaker 4: the way, this comes from mother Tradition seventy seven to

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Speaker 4: four on the ar slash ok Storytime super Because a

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Speaker 4: lot of our friends that live in our state were

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Speaker 4: unable to travel for the wedding, my mom decided to

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Speaker 4: host a small reception that will be happening later this month.

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Speaker 4: Oh sweet, I'm in my last year of law school

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Speaker 4: and I'm also working a full time job. When my

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Speaker 4: mom mentioned the idea for the second reception a few

326
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Speaker 4: months ago. I immediately told her I wouldn't be able

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Speaker 4: to help. I helped plan my sister's wedding, but I

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00:14:42,720 --> 00:14:44,880
Speaker 4: volunteered to bay for the cake as well as a

329
00:14:44,880 --> 00:14:47,400
Speaker 4: way of contributing. She said that was fine, and we

330
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Speaker 4: should begin planning as soon as the wedding was over.

331
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Speaker 4: One thing led to another, and I ended up doing

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Speaker 4: ninety percent of the planning myself. Basically, what had happened

333
00:14:56,560 --> 00:14:59,240
Speaker 4: is my mom would suggest an idea and ask me

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Speaker 4: to research it. I would present it to her with

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Speaker 4: my research, and she would ask me to follow up

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Speaker 4: with the vendor. I would do that, but by doing so,

337
00:15:06,720 --> 00:15:11,160
Speaker 4: I advertently became the liaison between the vendor and my parents.

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Speaker 4: The only thing my mom has done on her own

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Speaker 4: is select the theme, the invitations, and the decorations. I

340
00:15:18,240 --> 00:15:22,760
Speaker 4: booked the venue, selected the menu, booked the entertainment, designed

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Speaker 4: and ordered invitations, as well as made the address labels

342
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Speaker 4: for them. My parents are still paying all of the costs.

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Speaker 4: I just did the majority of the actual planning. Here's

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00:15:35,120 --> 00:15:37,640
Speaker 4: the problem. In the last two months, I encountered three

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Speaker 4: unexpected expenses that put about twelve hundred bucks of a

346
00:15:42,080 --> 00:15:45,600
Speaker 4: whole in my finances. I even had to pay my

347
00:15:45,720 --> 00:15:48,920
Speaker 4: rent late this month. By my estimates, I won't be

348
00:15:49,040 --> 00:15:51,880
Speaker 4: caught up until I received my holiday bonus from my

349
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Speaker 4: job in December. My last year bonus was thirteen hundred bucks.

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Speaker 4: The cake for my sister's party is going to cost

351
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Speaker 4: about three hundred bucks. I technically have the money, but

352
00:16:00,400 --> 00:16:03,360
Speaker 4: I'll have almost had nothing left for the month after

353
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Speaker 4: my bills are paid. Would it be wrong to ask

354
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Speaker 4: my family to help with the cost? I feel bad

355
00:16:08,600 --> 00:16:11,880
Speaker 4: for asking because I volunteered to pay for it and

356
00:16:11,960 --> 00:16:14,880
Speaker 4: my parents didn't budget for it. Also, my sister and

357
00:16:14,920 --> 00:16:17,160
Speaker 4: brother in law don't live in our state, so they

358
00:16:17,200 --> 00:16:19,360
Speaker 4: have to pay for a fly and hotel for the

359
00:16:19,400 --> 00:16:22,120
Speaker 4: weekend of the party. At the same time, there won't

360
00:16:22,120 --> 00:16:25,000
Speaker 4: be a party if it wasn't for me doing all

361
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Speaker 4: the work to plan it. I don't think it'll be

362
00:16:27,240 --> 00:16:28,840
Speaker 4: a bad I did ask the parents.

363
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Speaker 3: I don't think that's that bad, especially if they're your family,

364
00:16:31,840 --> 00:16:34,320
Speaker 3: Like they should understand that there's some sort of emergency.

365
00:16:34,680 --> 00:16:38,360
Speaker 3: I'm assuming it's some sort of like health related, car related,

366
00:16:38,440 --> 00:16:42,000
Speaker 3: house related issue where you really didn't have time to

367
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Speaker 3: pay for it, like it was something very necessary, and

368
00:16:44,000 --> 00:16:47,080
Speaker 3: I feel like your family should understand that, and so

369
00:16:47,120 --> 00:16:49,560
Speaker 3: if you just ask, like, hey, I'm really sorry. I

370
00:16:49,680 --> 00:16:51,680
Speaker 3: know I offered to do this. I really want to

371
00:16:51,720 --> 00:16:54,960
Speaker 3: do this, however, I just don't think i'll have enough

372
00:16:55,000 --> 00:16:57,800
Speaker 3: money for other things if I do. Yeah, I feel

373
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Speaker 3: like that's super understandable.

374
00:16:59,000 --> 00:17:02,360
Speaker 4: It's a super understandable. And she is in her thirties, though.

375
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Speaker 3: I still think that's okay.

376
00:17:03,400 --> 00:17:06,320
Speaker 4: We have some relevve comments just ducky four now, No,

377
00:17:06,840 --> 00:17:09,440
Speaker 4: and you wouldn't be wrong for sending them an invoice

378
00:17:09,480 --> 00:17:12,960
Speaker 4: for your time spent planning. I wouldn't recommend it, though,

379
00:17:13,160 --> 00:17:15,199
Speaker 4: unless you want to blow up. I also tell them

380
00:17:15,200 --> 00:17:16,840
Speaker 4: that they need to pay for the whole cake, since

381
00:17:16,880 --> 00:17:19,399
Speaker 4: your offer of paying for it was contingent on the

382
00:17:19,440 --> 00:17:22,360
Speaker 4: fact that you wouldn't do the planning yet and they

383
00:17:22,440 --> 00:17:24,600
Speaker 4: had you do most of the planning. You need to

384
00:17:24,640 --> 00:17:27,760
Speaker 4: find your way back home, opee, or they will continue

385
00:17:27,760 --> 00:17:29,720
Speaker 4: to take advantage of you. Also make it clear you

386
00:17:29,760 --> 00:17:32,560
Speaker 4: won't be setting up or cleaning up after the wedding,

387
00:17:33,080 --> 00:17:36,000
Speaker 4: as you have more than done your part, Opie said.

388
00:17:36,119 --> 00:17:37,960
Speaker 4: Or you made it clearer to my family that I'm

389
00:17:38,000 --> 00:17:40,520
Speaker 4: not doing anything else for this party. I'm not even

390
00:17:40,560 --> 00:17:43,359
Speaker 4: showing up early. The party starts at five VM, and

391
00:17:43,480 --> 00:17:46,600
Speaker 4: that's when I will arrive. I now realize I shouldn't

392
00:17:46,600 --> 00:17:49,119
Speaker 4: have agreed on to do too much, and I won't

393
00:17:49,160 --> 00:17:52,280
Speaker 4: do it again. Your people pleasing is showing opie mutual

394
00:17:52,359 --> 00:17:55,960
Speaker 4: buttons squeeze in for real. She wants a second wedding

395
00:17:56,000 --> 00:18:00,400
Speaker 4: reception on someone else's dime. The effing entitlement, He says

396
00:18:00,440 --> 00:18:03,560
Speaker 4: to clarify, the party was not on my sister's idea.

397
00:18:03,680 --> 00:18:06,520
Speaker 4: It was my mom's. My sister supports the idea, but

398
00:18:06,640 --> 00:18:09,160
Speaker 4: she doesn't care if it happens or not. Signal Violinist

399
00:18:09,240 --> 00:18:13,240
Speaker 4: ninety five says, not wrong at all. Good luck with school.

400
00:18:13,280 --> 00:18:15,120
Speaker 4: You didn't choose an easy road, but I'm sure you're

401
00:18:15,119 --> 00:18:17,200
Speaker 4: on a very positive road. Oh yeah, because she's a

402
00:18:17,280 --> 00:18:18,960
Speaker 4: law in school for to be a lawyer and working

403
00:18:19,320 --> 00:18:21,679
Speaker 4: about that. I totally forgot about that. Oh my gosh.

404
00:18:21,720 --> 00:18:24,040
Speaker 4: By the way, impress how much time you spent on

405
00:18:24,080 --> 00:18:27,119
Speaker 4: your sister. I hope she is worth it if he says,

406
00:18:27,320 --> 00:18:29,760
Speaker 4: she's definitely worth it. She's a wonderful sister and has

407
00:18:29,760 --> 00:18:33,080
Speaker 4: been incredibly supportive of me. She's actually paying the fee

408
00:18:33,119 --> 00:18:36,359
Speaker 4: for my bar exam as a law student graduation gift.

409
00:18:36,480 --> 00:18:38,800
Speaker 4: That's why I stepped up and planned this party for

410
00:18:38,840 --> 00:18:42,560
Speaker 4: her without hesitation or complaints. It might explain why my

411
00:18:42,640 --> 00:18:46,040
Speaker 4: family is oblivious to the fact that I've taken on

412
00:18:46,280 --> 00:18:49,200
Speaker 4: too much. And last comment, Kay Corolla says, you told

413
00:18:49,240 --> 00:18:51,120
Speaker 4: them you would pay for it, and you should on

414
00:18:51,200 --> 00:18:54,439
Speaker 4: your word. You have reminded Mom that you said you

415
00:18:54,480 --> 00:18:57,159
Speaker 4: can't help with the planning as it happened, and discuss

416
00:18:57,280 --> 00:19:00,200
Speaker 4: helping her but not by buying the cake. Then maybe

417
00:19:00,200 --> 00:19:02,480
Speaker 4: asked Mom to help you or front the money. Say

418
00:19:02,480 --> 00:19:04,920
Speaker 4: what you mean and do what you say you will do.

419
00:19:05,200 --> 00:19:07,640
Speaker 4: Be a person who is reliable and keeps their word.

420
00:19:07,760 --> 00:19:11,280
Speaker 4: It's extremely important trait. Opie says, I'm not saying this

421
00:19:11,400 --> 00:19:13,800
Speaker 4: to argue, but I do think it's unfair to say

422
00:19:13,840 --> 00:19:16,080
Speaker 4: I'm not being reliable or keeping my word. When I

423
00:19:16,080 --> 00:19:18,280
Speaker 4: said I would pay for the craike, I didn't know

424
00:19:18,480 --> 00:19:22,040
Speaker 4: I would have these unexpected expenses less than too much

425
00:19:22,080 --> 00:19:24,880
Speaker 4: before the party if emergencies happened. One of the reasons

426
00:19:24,920 --> 00:19:27,400
Speaker 4: I didn't have the money saved to cover the expenses

427
00:19:27,480 --> 00:19:29,560
Speaker 4: was because I spent so much money on paying the

428
00:19:29,640 --> 00:19:33,520
Speaker 4: cost of being my sisters made of honor, travel expenses, dress, hair,

429
00:19:33,840 --> 00:19:35,639
Speaker 4: make up. I spent the last year going above and

430
00:19:35,680 --> 00:19:38,200
Speaker 4: beyond for my sister. I would gladly do it again.

431
00:19:38,359 --> 00:19:40,840
Speaker 4: I just don't think I should go broke for buying

432
00:19:40,920 --> 00:19:42,240
Speaker 4: this cake and we have an update.

433
00:19:42,280 --> 00:19:44,800
Speaker 3: I agree. I think that one commentary that was like

434
00:19:45,040 --> 00:19:48,560
Speaker 3: stay by your word, be a good person or whatever,

435
00:19:48,600 --> 00:19:50,880
Speaker 3: I feel like that's kind of easier so than done.

436
00:19:51,000 --> 00:19:53,080
Speaker 3: Like sure, you wouldn't do that in any situation, but

437
00:19:53,160 --> 00:19:55,840
Speaker 3: sometimes we agree to things that are out of our

438
00:19:55,920 --> 00:19:59,040
Speaker 3: actual capabilities, and then are we agreed to things that

439
00:19:59,160 --> 00:20:01,920
Speaker 3: are like, you know, taking on more than we can handle.

440
00:20:02,160 --> 00:20:05,159
Speaker 3: And I think it's okay to backtrack on some of

441
00:20:05,200 --> 00:20:06,280
Speaker 3: that stuff a little bit.

442
00:20:06,359 --> 00:20:08,000
Speaker 4: You know, Yeah, your mom said she was gonna do this,

443
00:20:08,119 --> 00:20:10,440
Speaker 4: you said you were gonna do that. It yeah, flipped,

444
00:20:10,800 --> 00:20:11,960
Speaker 4: and I think you need a conversation.

445
00:20:12,040 --> 00:20:14,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, because it's again, it's like it's not like she's

446
00:20:14,119 --> 00:20:17,080
Speaker 3: not helping, like she's helping so much, doing so much

447
00:20:17,119 --> 00:20:19,400
Speaker 3: planning and doing all these like bridesmaide stuff, Like that's

448
00:20:19,400 --> 00:20:21,240
Speaker 3: a lot of stuff. It's just this one cake.

449
00:20:21,480 --> 00:20:24,280
Speaker 4: Honestly, you should just woman up and get another part

450
00:20:24,280 --> 00:20:26,520
Speaker 4: time gig uber drive until you get three undred bucks

451
00:20:26,520 --> 00:20:27,040
Speaker 4: and I pay for the cake.

452
00:20:27,040 --> 00:20:29,560
Speaker 3: Then yeah, just you don't need like sleep or eating

453
00:20:29,720 --> 00:20:32,119
Speaker 3: or anything like that. Just like take all your time

454
00:20:32,280 --> 00:20:33,560
Speaker 3: to support this wedding.

455
00:20:33,640 --> 00:20:34,600
Speaker 4: Yeah, don't show up on time.

456
00:20:34,720 --> 00:20:35,840
Speaker 3: That isn't yours all right now?

457
00:20:35,880 --> 00:20:38,080
Speaker 4: We got an update. About a month ago, I posted

458
00:20:38,119 --> 00:20:40,520
Speaker 4: about a conflict I was having regarding a cake I

459
00:20:40,520 --> 00:20:43,600
Speaker 4: had offered to purchase for my sister's second wedding reception.

460
00:20:43,760 --> 00:20:45,679
Speaker 4: I could no longer afford the cake due to some

461
00:20:45,720 --> 00:20:49,000
Speaker 4: financial difficulties I was dealing with, and the overwhelming opinion

462
00:20:49,040 --> 00:20:51,199
Speaker 4: of the sub was that I should tell my family

463
00:20:51,480 --> 00:20:53,320
Speaker 4: I can't pay for the cake. I follow that advice,

464
00:20:53,480 --> 00:20:55,560
Speaker 4: and it worked, oh yea better than I would have hoped.

465
00:20:55,600 --> 00:20:57,920
Speaker 4: When I told my parents about my problem, they offered

466
00:20:57,960 --> 00:21:00,480
Speaker 4: to pay for the cake without hesitation. It was nice

467
00:21:00,480 --> 00:21:02,520
Speaker 4: to me to pay for the cake, but they didn't

468
00:21:02,520 --> 00:21:04,240
Speaker 4: want me to do it if it would cause a

469
00:21:04,280 --> 00:21:06,919
Speaker 4: financial strength. My sister said we could just get a

470
00:21:06,960 --> 00:21:09,520
Speaker 4: cake from the grocery store, but my parents really wanted

471
00:21:09,520 --> 00:21:11,280
Speaker 4: it to be a wedding cake and they didn't mind

472
00:21:11,280 --> 00:21:12,919
Speaker 4: paying the costs. I hope you don't mind paying the

473
00:21:12,920 --> 00:21:14,560
Speaker 4: costs of your time to join us live at three

474
00:21:14,560 --> 00:21:17,240
Speaker 4: pm PST just tap her profile another surprising term. My

475
00:21:17,320 --> 00:21:19,520
Speaker 4: mom called me last week and asked me to explain

476
00:21:19,600 --> 00:21:22,119
Speaker 4: in more detail exactly what was going on with my finances.

477
00:21:22,200 --> 00:21:24,240
Speaker 4: I'd been very caught up when I told her I

478
00:21:24,240 --> 00:21:26,720
Speaker 4: couldn't pay for the cake, and she knew there was

479
00:21:26,840 --> 00:21:29,080
Speaker 4: more to the story. I told her the twelve hundred

480
00:21:29,080 --> 00:21:32,760
Speaker 4: dollars hole in my finances, and she was really empathetic.

481
00:21:32,840 --> 00:21:34,520
Speaker 4: She told me she would call me back, and when

482
00:21:34,600 --> 00:21:36,520
Speaker 4: she did, she had my dad on speaker. They were

483
00:21:36,520 --> 00:21:38,560
Speaker 4: going to give me a thousand bucks to help me out.

484
00:21:38,920 --> 00:21:40,399
Speaker 1: Oh wow, a band.

485
00:21:40,520 --> 00:21:42,439
Speaker 4: They said. They wish they could give me more, but

486
00:21:42,520 --> 00:21:44,960
Speaker 4: that's all they can do on short notice. I was

487
00:21:45,080 --> 00:21:48,359
Speaker 4: absolutely shocked. This experience taught me that being a people

488
00:21:48,400 --> 00:21:51,359
Speaker 4: pleaser only benefits to people around here. I'm finally learning

489
00:21:51,359 --> 00:21:54,199
Speaker 4: that setting boundaries isn't a sign of weakness, it's a

490
00:21:54,240 --> 00:21:56,400
Speaker 4: sign of strength. I hope this story can encourage other

491
00:21:56,440 --> 00:21:59,000
Speaker 4: people pleasers out there that it's okay to say no.

492
00:21:59,320 --> 00:22:00,120
Speaker 4: Great family were.

493
00:22:00,560 --> 00:22:02,720
Speaker 3: Like, I think this is a great ending. I think

494
00:22:02,720 --> 00:22:05,600
Speaker 3: that's exactly what we were expecting, because, like, the problem

495
00:22:05,880 --> 00:22:07,760
Speaker 3: really wasn't that big. It was just in her people

496
00:22:07,760 --> 00:22:09,960
Speaker 3: pleasing head of just feeling like I said I would

497
00:22:10,000 --> 00:22:11,920
Speaker 3: do this and I feel really bad, like I really

498
00:22:11,920 --> 00:22:15,640
Speaker 3: want to, but I just can't. And that's okay, And

499
00:22:15,760 --> 00:22:19,119
Speaker 3: like we expected, her family is good and understands that.

500
00:22:19,480 --> 00:22:22,159
Speaker 3: And I'm so glad it didn't take a typical Reddit

501
00:22:22,200 --> 00:22:27,960
Speaker 3: turn and wasn't good And wasn't it banished from the buying? Yeah? Yeah,

502
00:22:28,000 --> 00:22:30,920
Speaker 3: so I'm I'm really pleased with how that all ended.

503
00:22:32,040 --> 00:22:35,399
Speaker 3: My boyfriend's family hates me so much, but I've only

504
00:22:35,440 --> 00:22:36,359
Speaker 3: met them once.

505
00:22:36,680 --> 00:22:37,720
Speaker 4: You should have been better.

506
00:22:37,880 --> 00:22:40,159
Speaker 3: I have known my boyfriend for four years now, but

507
00:22:40,440 --> 00:22:43,879
Speaker 3: we recently decided to actually get together in February. He

508
00:22:43,960 --> 00:22:46,520
Speaker 3: states he has not seen his family in about four years,

509
00:22:46,600 --> 00:22:48,919
Speaker 3: and that his brother's graduation would be coming up in

510
00:22:49,040 --> 00:22:51,719
Speaker 3: June in Washington, and that he wanted to go. By

511
00:22:51,760 --> 00:22:54,520
Speaker 3: the way this comes from you slash Julia Rose twenty

512
00:22:54,600 --> 00:22:57,800
Speaker 3: on the r slash Okay story time separated. I agreed, Fine,

513
00:22:57,840 --> 00:23:00,719
Speaker 3: sure I'll go, he said he had already to be

514
00:23:00,880 --> 00:23:03,800
Speaker 3: writing with his sister let's call Christine and her fiance.

515
00:23:04,000 --> 00:23:06,760
Speaker 3: I said, okay, since they're the ones that live in

516
00:23:06,760 --> 00:23:09,960
Speaker 3: California with us. Months before the trip, I have never

517
00:23:10,040 --> 00:23:13,320
Speaker 3: spoken a word to his sister Christie, nor to his family.

518
00:23:13,400 --> 00:23:15,959
Speaker 3: But his sister Christie said that she would not be

519
00:23:16,040 --> 00:23:18,800
Speaker 3: allowing me to go to her wedding. It was not

520
00:23:18,920 --> 00:23:22,320
Speaker 3: within her budget at first, she said, and because she

521
00:23:22,640 --> 00:23:25,480
Speaker 3: did not know me. But her wedding is now in September,

522
00:23:25,600 --> 00:23:29,000
Speaker 3: and we would be writing from California to Washington together

523
00:23:29,040 --> 00:23:32,080
Speaker 3: in June and spending an entire three day weekend together.

524
00:23:32,119 --> 00:23:33,840
Speaker 3: Why would I not be allowed to be your brother's

525
00:23:33,840 --> 00:23:36,800
Speaker 3: plus one? And we even offered to pay for all

526
00:23:36,840 --> 00:23:40,600
Speaker 3: my costs then as well, which was all declined. So

527
00:23:40,880 --> 00:23:43,720
Speaker 3: my boyfriend said he would just not attend her wedding.

528
00:23:43,760 --> 00:23:49,240
Speaker 3: Then oo, here comes June time for the day of

529
00:23:49,440 --> 00:23:53,080
Speaker 3: the trip, I intuitively just had a bad feeling about

530
00:23:53,280 --> 00:23:56,239
Speaker 3: going all day long. My boyfriend got off work at

531
00:23:56,240 --> 00:23:59,160
Speaker 3: around four pm, met Christy at the car rental place,

532
00:23:59,520 --> 00:24:02,640
Speaker 3: and then he told her to meet us later on

533
00:24:02,960 --> 00:24:04,920
Speaker 3: and he would tell her when we were ready, as

534
00:24:04,960 --> 00:24:07,280
Speaker 3: he had to finish running a few errands for us

535
00:24:07,320 --> 00:24:10,720
Speaker 3: to leave with everything smoothly for a trip. Well, the

536
00:24:10,760 --> 00:24:13,480
Speaker 3: minute he got home, his sister was already at our place.

537
00:24:13,800 --> 00:24:16,440
Speaker 3: She looked at him and said, did you just get here?

538
00:24:16,560 --> 00:24:19,520
Speaker 3: So he comes upstairs as I am already in a

539
00:24:19,640 --> 00:24:22,840
Speaker 3: rush to go. He proceeds to say she's waiting downstairs.

540
00:24:22,880 --> 00:24:25,800
Speaker 3: He hasn't showered. He told me what he wanted to pack.

541
00:24:25,920 --> 00:24:28,240
Speaker 3: I never know what clothes he wants to wear, and honestly,

542
00:24:28,280 --> 00:24:30,600
Speaker 3: he takes a long time on the toilet. I started

543
00:24:30,600 --> 00:24:32,800
Speaker 3: telling him that it is rude of his sister to

544
00:24:32,840 --> 00:24:35,240
Speaker 3: just show up. She called him every ten minutes for

545
00:24:35,280 --> 00:24:38,720
Speaker 3: an hour, saying let's go. Yet she wasn't going to

546
00:24:38,760 --> 00:24:41,040
Speaker 3: be the one driving. My boyfriend was supposed to drive

547
00:24:41,119 --> 00:24:43,399
Speaker 3: us all the way to Washington or switch off with me,

548
00:24:43,600 --> 00:24:46,040
Speaker 3: So why does it matter when we left. We were

549
00:24:46,160 --> 00:24:49,199
Speaker 3: going to get there on time regardless. Well, Christy was

550
00:24:49,240 --> 00:24:51,480
Speaker 3: on the phone with his stepmom let's call her Tina,

551
00:24:51,640 --> 00:24:53,640
Speaker 3: and she said it's too late at night to drive

552
00:24:53,800 --> 00:24:58,000
Speaker 3: and dangerous. So Christy left. We walked downstairs about an

553
00:24:58,000 --> 00:25:00,760
Speaker 3: hour later and they were gone and said that they

554
00:25:00,800 --> 00:25:03,960
Speaker 3: would come back around one to three am. My boyfriend

555
00:25:03,960 --> 00:25:07,000
Speaker 3: and I decided to leave in our own car, in

556
00:25:07,040 --> 00:25:10,880
Speaker 3: my car actually, and we drove to Washington all night long.

557
00:25:11,040 --> 00:25:13,520
Speaker 3: We got there just fine. I was exhausted from staying

558
00:25:13,560 --> 00:25:16,280
Speaker 3: up all night on a long drive. From California to Washington.

559
00:25:16,400 --> 00:25:18,480
Speaker 3: It was my first trip ever going that far. At

560
00:25:18,560 --> 00:25:22,080
Speaker 3: most I have gone from California to Oregon and driving

561
00:25:22,119 --> 00:25:24,520
Speaker 3: all along the coast just short of the Oregon border.

562
00:25:24,600 --> 00:25:26,960
Speaker 3: I have never been to Washington before. I was nervous

563
00:25:26,960 --> 00:25:29,560
Speaker 3: to meet my boyfriend's family. Well, the time had come.

564
00:25:29,600 --> 00:25:32,040
Speaker 3: We arrived at his parents' house. The minute we walked

565
00:25:32,119 --> 00:25:35,600
Speaker 3: up onto the port, his stepmother, Tina opened the front door.

566
00:25:35,680 --> 00:25:37,840
Speaker 3: She acted as though she had cared about how we

567
00:25:37,840 --> 00:25:41,399
Speaker 3: were doing, and then in one instance, instantly started berating

568
00:25:41,400 --> 00:25:45,760
Speaker 3: my boyfriend on leaving his baby sister behind because she

569
00:25:45,920 --> 00:25:48,760
Speaker 3: had never driven that far on her own before. Yet,

570
00:25:48,880 --> 00:25:51,680
Speaker 3: his sister and I are the same age, both twenty four,

571
00:25:51,800 --> 00:25:54,399
Speaker 3: and my boyfriend is twenty seven. If my boyfriend and

572
00:25:54,440 --> 00:25:57,920
Speaker 3: I just switched off halfway driving, she sure can drive

573
00:25:57,960 --> 00:26:00,399
Speaker 3: here as well on her own. We went side the

574
00:26:00,400 --> 00:26:03,199
Speaker 3: house and his stepmom was still going on ah. His

575
00:26:03,240 --> 00:26:05,280
Speaker 3: stepmom was saying that we should have been ready on

576
00:26:05,359 --> 00:26:08,399
Speaker 3: Christie's time, because Christy was ready with no remorse for

577
00:26:08,480 --> 00:26:10,520
Speaker 3: what we had to do with ourselves to go on

578
00:26:10,520 --> 00:26:12,000
Speaker 3: our own trip as well.

579
00:26:12,080 --> 00:26:13,920
Speaker 4: Well, maybe Christy should have learned patience.

580
00:26:14,080 --> 00:26:16,840
Speaker 3: I agree, I had to take time off work, and

581
00:26:16,920 --> 00:26:19,120
Speaker 3: I had animals that I had to drop off with

582
00:26:19,160 --> 00:26:21,480
Speaker 3: my mom to stay at her place. While I have

583
00:26:21,560 --> 00:26:25,359
Speaker 3: been silent this whole time, letting his stepmother brate and

584
00:26:25,520 --> 00:26:29,480
Speaker 3: talk down horribly to my boyfriend while still passively saying

585
00:26:29,600 --> 00:26:32,800
Speaker 3: it towards me too, especially when she's saying it's not

586
00:26:32,960 --> 00:26:35,840
Speaker 3: adult like. Basically, it was like she was talking behind

587
00:26:35,840 --> 00:26:39,160
Speaker 3: my back to my face. Ah, I would say, fifteen

588
00:26:39,200 --> 00:26:42,560
Speaker 3: minutes had gone by and she was still ranting on.

589
00:26:42,880 --> 00:26:45,960
Speaker 3: I eventually interrupted and said, I'm sorry. I don't mean

590
00:26:46,000 --> 00:26:48,879
Speaker 3: to say anything wrong, but as far as I was aware,

591
00:26:49,000 --> 00:26:52,080
Speaker 3: we had never set a time on leaving, and Christine

592
00:26:52,119 --> 00:26:54,400
Speaker 3: was aware we had stuff to do. She also had

593
00:26:54,400 --> 00:26:56,440
Speaker 3: first said that she would get a snacks or food

594
00:26:56,480 --> 00:26:59,600
Speaker 3: for the trip, and then said, nah, never mind, you

595
00:26:59,640 --> 00:27:02,040
Speaker 3: guys go and get all the snacks. I was just

596
00:27:02,119 --> 00:27:05,600
Speaker 3: asking all about yourselves. So that set us back with

597
00:27:05,720 --> 00:27:08,280
Speaker 3: one more thing added to the list, and that was

598
00:27:08,440 --> 00:27:10,680
Speaker 3: really it. He had to shower, which was the only

599
00:27:10,760 --> 00:27:13,440
Speaker 3: reason they sat downstairs for so long. I also had

600
00:27:13,480 --> 00:27:16,240
Speaker 3: to drop off my German shepherd in a new apartment

601
00:27:16,280 --> 00:27:18,600
Speaker 3: at my mom's house, and I was rushing to get

602
00:27:18,680 --> 00:27:20,880
Speaker 3: us already and I didn't want to waste even more

603
00:27:20,920 --> 00:27:23,159
Speaker 3: time introducing the two of them, since he may be

604
00:27:23,320 --> 00:27:26,640
Speaker 3: scary and he's very loud, and apparently because I said

605
00:27:26,640 --> 00:27:30,720
Speaker 3: those few simple sentences, I disrespected his stepmother Tina, in

606
00:27:30,800 --> 00:27:34,600
Speaker 3: her own house. It doesn't seem like disrespect. That does

607
00:27:34,720 --> 00:27:39,440
Speaker 3: seem like she's just saying what happened. I guess how

608
00:27:39,520 --> 00:27:41,920
Speaker 3: you say it depends on the disrespect, but.

609
00:27:42,000 --> 00:27:44,800
Speaker 4: Doesn't sound like she said disrespectfully. She was just laying

610
00:27:44,800 --> 00:27:47,600
Speaker 4: it all out and hope he was also just got

611
00:27:47,600 --> 00:27:48,760
Speaker 4: back from driving all night.

612
00:27:48,800 --> 00:27:51,720
Speaker 3: When I went to the bathroom immediately after this, Tina

613
00:27:51,800 --> 00:27:54,040
Speaker 3: had pulled my boyfriend aside and told him that she

614
00:27:54,080 --> 00:27:56,720
Speaker 3: does not like me, that I'm rude. I should have

615
00:27:56,840 --> 00:27:59,760
Speaker 3: never said a single thing in her effing house and

616
00:28:00,160 --> 00:28:02,760
Speaker 3: been a mute. She also said that I am the

617
00:28:02,760 --> 00:28:06,359
Speaker 3: most disrespectful person ever. All of this. While I was

618
00:28:06,359 --> 00:28:09,040
Speaker 3: in the bathroom, I felt the vibes were so off.

619
00:28:09,119 --> 00:28:09,879
Speaker 4: It's so weird.

620
00:28:10,040 --> 00:28:12,560
Speaker 3: I could not believe we had just been getting yelled

621
00:28:12,600 --> 00:28:15,119
Speaker 3: at from the minute we had walked up onto the porch.

622
00:28:15,320 --> 00:28:17,720
Speaker 3: I have never met this person a day in my life.

623
00:28:17,760 --> 00:28:20,640
Speaker 3: That is not very welcoming at all. I started looking

624
00:28:20,640 --> 00:28:22,600
Speaker 3: for a hotel room and how many points I had

625
00:28:22,600 --> 00:28:25,000
Speaker 3: for my hotel rewards so I could get a room

626
00:28:25,080 --> 00:28:28,119
Speaker 3: somewhere else, since the original plan was to say it

627
00:28:28,200 --> 00:28:28,719
Speaker 3: his parents.

628
00:28:28,720 --> 00:28:30,520
Speaker 4: It's fair, that's fair, That is pretty fair.

629
00:28:30,400 --> 00:28:32,760
Speaker 3: Honestly, but there was no way I could stay with

630
00:28:32,800 --> 00:28:35,240
Speaker 3: his parents after all that. Okay, so we got a

631
00:28:35,240 --> 00:28:39,080
Speaker 3: hotel room. Nice at first, my boyfriend said I wasn't

632
00:28:39,120 --> 00:28:41,640
Speaker 3: trying hard enough with his family. My boyfriend makes me

633
00:28:41,720 --> 00:28:46,160
Speaker 3: apologize on the phone to Tina for being disrespectful while

634
00:28:46,200 --> 00:28:48,120
Speaker 3: on our way to the motel. I told her I'm

635
00:28:48,120 --> 00:28:50,360
Speaker 3: sorry if she felt like that, because that was not

636
00:28:50,480 --> 00:28:52,800
Speaker 3: my intentions at all. I told her that I had

637
00:28:52,840 --> 00:28:56,960
Speaker 3: just wanted a normal first introduction to happen. Graduation was

638
00:28:57,000 --> 00:29:00,880
Speaker 3: this night as well. Also, Christie still hadn't which led

639
00:29:00,920 --> 00:29:04,840
Speaker 3: to Tina yelling at me because Christie's back was hurting,

640
00:29:05,000 --> 00:29:07,720
Speaker 3: so she stopped in organ They stopped in Orgon because

641
00:29:07,840 --> 00:29:10,800
Speaker 3: Christie's fiance couldn't drive due to epilepsy. This is my

642
00:29:10,920 --> 00:29:13,200
Speaker 3: first time hearing of this. How would I know that

643
00:29:13,400 --> 00:29:16,120
Speaker 3: I was also yelled at for the graduation for his

644
00:29:16,200 --> 00:29:19,520
Speaker 3: brother being ruined by me, even though I did not

645
00:29:19,600 --> 00:29:22,400
Speaker 3: attend the graduation at all and stayed in our hotel.

646
00:29:22,520 --> 00:29:25,640
Speaker 3: Fast forward to the entire weekend. I was around them

647
00:29:25,640 --> 00:29:27,760
Speaker 3: at the house. We did not really speak to each other.

648
00:29:27,840 --> 00:29:29,800
Speaker 3: They did not ask things about me. I only had

649
00:29:29,920 --> 00:29:32,120
Speaker 3: one drink at the house. I did not vaporround them.

650
00:29:32,200 --> 00:29:34,480
Speaker 3: I stayed outside. The only one who spoke to me

651
00:29:34,880 --> 00:29:37,400
Speaker 3: and treated me like a human this entire weekend was

652
00:29:37,400 --> 00:29:40,400
Speaker 3: my boyfriend's fifteen year old sister. Why did I mention

653
00:29:40,480 --> 00:29:42,600
Speaker 3: the beer and the vaping. It's very important to the

654
00:29:42,640 --> 00:29:43,560
Speaker 3: story for later on.

655
00:29:43,720 --> 00:29:45,640
Speaker 4: Oh I see I see you.

656
00:29:45,960 --> 00:29:49,560
Speaker 3: Christy never said hello, nothing to me at all. It

657
00:29:49,600 --> 00:29:52,800
Speaker 3: was honestly one of the most depressing experiences of my life.

658
00:29:52,840 --> 00:29:55,520
Speaker 3: I never for a thought would have ever had gone

659
00:29:55,960 --> 00:29:58,520
Speaker 3: had I knew it would have been like this, had

660
00:29:58,560 --> 00:30:01,360
Speaker 3: I knew that it. It feels like my life has

661
00:30:01,440 --> 00:30:03,920
Speaker 3: changed a bit because of this. I also should mention

662
00:30:04,120 --> 00:30:06,760
Speaker 3: now I have lost one hundred plus pounds in my

663
00:30:06,800 --> 00:30:08,840
Speaker 3: life from being a fat person my whole life to

664
00:30:08,960 --> 00:30:11,320
Speaker 3: in the past few years being fairy into fitness and

665
00:30:11,360 --> 00:30:14,120
Speaker 3: getting healthy. Good job, good for you. I have all

666
00:30:14,160 --> 00:30:16,240
Speaker 3: the things related to weight loss. When it comes to

667
00:30:16,720 --> 00:30:19,320
Speaker 3: looser skin on my arms and thighs, I have worked

668
00:30:19,360 --> 00:30:21,600
Speaker 3: hard for the confidence I have gained now, just to

669
00:30:21,640 --> 00:30:23,680
Speaker 3: be knocked down for all my efforts. I want to

670
00:30:23,680 --> 00:30:26,600
Speaker 3: say maybe a week had gone by the cops knocked

671
00:30:26,600 --> 00:30:29,520
Speaker 3: on my door. I wasn't home. My boyfriend and mother were.

672
00:30:29,680 --> 00:30:31,760
Speaker 3: The cops said that they were there to provide a

673
00:30:31,760 --> 00:30:36,000
Speaker 3: welfare check because his family was worried for my boyfriend's welfare.

674
00:30:36,080 --> 00:30:38,720
Speaker 3: They said that I had beat up my boyfriend said

675
00:30:38,760 --> 00:30:41,320
Speaker 3: he can't speak to his family, that I am a

676
00:30:41,520 --> 00:30:46,120
Speaker 3: Coca Cola head and like et cetera. Oh witch, none

677
00:30:46,240 --> 00:30:47,360
Speaker 3: of that is true.

678
00:30:47,640 --> 00:30:48,400
Speaker 4: You had one beer?

679
00:30:48,800 --> 00:30:51,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, this is where did this come from. I still

680
00:30:51,800 --> 00:30:54,200
Speaker 3: never told my boyfriend he couldn't talk to them, so

681
00:30:54,800 --> 00:30:57,160
Speaker 3: what the heck? Since then, we have had the cops

682
00:30:57,240 --> 00:31:01,240
Speaker 3: call our house four times. It has been four months.

683
00:31:01,360 --> 00:31:06,000
Speaker 3: His family still leaves texts and calls saying that I'm fat, ugly,

684
00:31:06,200 --> 00:31:10,240
Speaker 3: my skin is disgusting, and that I'm a Coca Cola head.

685
00:31:10,280 --> 00:31:12,640
Speaker 3: I vape and drank soon it means I'm a loser

686
00:31:12,920 --> 00:31:16,240
Speaker 3: and that I will do math or Coca cola and

687
00:31:16,280 --> 00:31:19,600
Speaker 3: beat up my boyfriend in his sleep. I'm a manipulator,

688
00:31:19,680 --> 00:31:21,960
Speaker 3: I'm a user. If he has kids with me they

689
00:31:22,000 --> 00:31:23,880
Speaker 3: will never want anything to do with them, and that

690
00:31:24,000 --> 00:31:26,640
Speaker 3: I will end up abandoning my kids. That I'm a

691
00:31:26,920 --> 00:31:30,960
Speaker 3: B word, i am toxic, et cetera. You think of it,

692
00:31:31,120 --> 00:31:35,480
Speaker 3: They've said it. But yet why I have never understood

693
00:31:35,640 --> 00:31:38,280
Speaker 3: was I the problem? From the few simple sentences I

694
00:31:38,320 --> 00:31:42,480
Speaker 3: said about the graduation? Was that really truly so disrespectful

695
00:31:42,520 --> 00:31:45,200
Speaker 3: to defend my partner and I? When before I went

696
00:31:45,240 --> 00:31:47,560
Speaker 3: on the trip, my partner told me how horrible his

697
00:31:47,600 --> 00:31:49,760
Speaker 3: family has treated him growing up and that he had

698
00:31:49,840 --> 00:31:53,200
Speaker 3: hoped they had changed. From one meet where I did

699
00:31:53,240 --> 00:31:56,080
Speaker 3: not talk to them about anything, I now deserve the

700
00:31:56,120 --> 00:31:58,920
Speaker 3: cops being called on me from now on. That will

701
00:31:58,960 --> 00:32:01,600
Speaker 3: now be on my record of nine one one calls

702
00:32:01,640 --> 00:32:04,960
Speaker 3: going to my residence for potential domestic violence that could

703
00:32:05,080 --> 00:32:09,560
Speaker 3: ruin my life in public reputation with false accusations like that.

704
00:32:09,880 --> 00:32:12,920
Speaker 3: By the way, something that could never ruin your life

705
00:32:13,040 --> 00:32:16,240
Speaker 3: is joining us on live on YouTube every weekday at

706
00:32:16,240 --> 00:32:20,040
Speaker 3: three pm. Just tap pr profile. Now it's September and

707
00:32:20,160 --> 00:32:24,680
Speaker 3: his sister, Christie's wedding is here this weekend. The whole

708
00:32:24,720 --> 00:32:28,360
Speaker 3: family is coming in town today. I feel as though

709
00:32:28,400 --> 00:32:30,880
Speaker 3: after four months I have a right to ask my

710
00:32:30,960 --> 00:32:33,320
Speaker 3: boyfriend to no longer speak to them from now on

711
00:32:33,600 --> 00:32:36,640
Speaker 3: until they learn that it's not acceptable to say those

712
00:32:36,680 --> 00:32:40,160
Speaker 3: things about me, because obviously what my partner has been

713
00:32:40,200 --> 00:32:42,800
Speaker 3: saying to them to so called defend me has not

714
00:32:42,840 --> 00:32:46,000
Speaker 3: been working right or am I entirely in the wrong here.

715
00:32:46,280 --> 00:32:49,440
Speaker 4: I would have a hard conversation with yourself, think do

716
00:32:49,520 --> 00:32:51,000
Speaker 4: I want to be with this person? How long do

717
00:32:51,040 --> 00:32:52,680
Speaker 4: I want to be with this person? If he has

718
00:32:52,720 --> 00:32:55,200
Speaker 4: a good relationship with his family, you might need to

719
00:32:55,240 --> 00:32:57,560
Speaker 4: dip out. They're going to treat you like this. He

720
00:32:57,640 --> 00:33:00,640
Speaker 4: has a good relationship with y, yeah, because it's like, oh,

721
00:33:01,080 --> 00:33:04,280
Speaker 4: we're good, there's nothing wrong here. Yeah, it's that's just

722
00:33:04,320 --> 00:33:04,800
Speaker 4: how they are.

723
00:33:04,840 --> 00:33:07,000
Speaker 3: But it doesn't seem like that's the case. Items Like

724
00:33:07,080 --> 00:33:09,880
Speaker 3: he's already had a bad relationship with them already in

725
00:33:09,920 --> 00:33:13,680
Speaker 3: that they've like been terrible to him in general, and

726
00:33:13,720 --> 00:33:16,600
Speaker 3: then now that she's here, now she's dealing with that. Yeah,

727
00:33:16,800 --> 00:33:19,720
Speaker 3: maybe don't ask him to cut them out. I think

728
00:33:19,760 --> 00:33:23,520
Speaker 3: maybe have a conversation where you suggest no, because I

729
00:33:23,560 --> 00:33:25,720
Speaker 3: think if you just come right out the gate being like, hey,

730
00:33:25,840 --> 00:33:27,320
Speaker 3: I need you to do this, I need you to

731
00:33:27,320 --> 00:33:29,680
Speaker 3: cut out your entire family because they're terrible and you

732
00:33:29,760 --> 00:33:31,800
Speaker 3: need to see that. Like that might be true. They

733
00:33:31,880 --> 00:33:33,400
Speaker 3: might be terrible. He might need to see it, and

734
00:33:33,440 --> 00:33:35,600
Speaker 3: that might be the best decision for him, but he

735
00:33:35,640 --> 00:33:37,040
Speaker 3: needs to come to that on his own.

736
00:33:37,560 --> 00:33:38,959
Speaker 1: Hey, it's Sam, your og host. Here.

737
00:33:38,960 --> 00:33:40,560
Speaker 2: We're gonna get back to the stories, but here's three

738
00:33:40,560 --> 00:33:44,800
Speaker 2: minutes of ads from our sponsors. My pregnant sister demanded

739
00:33:44,880 --> 00:33:47,160
Speaker 2: I house her and her delinkud boyfriend.

740
00:33:47,360 --> 00:33:48,240
Speaker 3: I refused.

741
00:33:48,600 --> 00:33:49,600
Speaker 1: That's a lot of people.

742
00:33:49,720 --> 00:33:51,959
Speaker 3: It's too many people. My family and I grew up

743
00:33:52,120 --> 00:33:52,680
Speaker 3: very poor.

744
00:33:52,920 --> 00:33:55,640
Speaker 2: From when I was old enough to legally work, I nineteen,

745
00:33:55,680 --> 00:33:58,840
Speaker 2: female have had to take on multiple jobs while balancing

746
00:33:58,880 --> 00:34:01,240
Speaker 2: school to help with my family and my younger sister.

747
00:34:01,320 --> 00:34:02,080
Speaker 3: By the way, this.

748
00:34:02,040 --> 00:34:05,120
Speaker 2: Comes from leone sixty eight on the Hour slash hookey

749
00:34:05,120 --> 00:34:07,720
Speaker 2: Storytime Suburbs. Growing up, I never had a lot, and

750
00:34:07,760 --> 00:34:10,160
Speaker 2: whatever money I earned, I would spend on my sister's

751
00:34:10,160 --> 00:34:13,120
Speaker 2: sixteen female and family. When I was eighteen and had

752
00:34:13,239 --> 00:34:15,920
Speaker 2: just been accepted into college, my dad's business that he

753
00:34:16,000 --> 00:34:19,359
Speaker 2: worked on for the past couple of years finally took off.

754
00:34:19,400 --> 00:34:21,400
Speaker 2: This also meant that my sister could now have a

755
00:34:21,440 --> 00:34:24,680
Speaker 2: normal high school experience without worrying about money. While I

756
00:34:24,760 --> 00:34:27,120
Speaker 2: was in college, I wasn't in contact with my sister

757
00:34:27,200 --> 00:34:29,880
Speaker 2: that much since I was so busy with school work. However,

758
00:34:30,000 --> 00:34:32,799
Speaker 2: from our calls and her social media, I could tell

759
00:34:32,880 --> 00:34:36,040
Speaker 2: she had changed completely and was involved with some bad people.

760
00:34:36,120 --> 00:34:39,160
Speaker 2: She would post videos on her snapchat of her getting uk,

761
00:34:39,239 --> 00:34:43,400
Speaker 2: smoking dope, jeweling, driving while most likely under the influence,

762
00:34:43,640 --> 00:34:45,680
Speaker 2: et cetera. I tried reaching out to her, but she

763
00:34:45,719 --> 00:34:48,239
Speaker 2: would mostly deny the claims and told me to mind

764
00:34:48,239 --> 00:34:51,600
Speaker 2: my own business. At some point, she'd justify her actions

765
00:34:51,719 --> 00:34:54,360
Speaker 2: using the argument, this is what the cool kids do now.

766
00:34:54,520 --> 00:34:56,120
Speaker 2: Not everyone was a nerd like you.

767
00:34:56,080 --> 00:34:58,320
Speaker 1: In high school, so she's doing college stuff as a

768
00:34:58,360 --> 00:34:58,880
Speaker 1: high schooler.

769
00:34:59,080 --> 00:35:00,920
Speaker 2: One of my high school friend who also had a

770
00:35:00,960 --> 00:35:03,080
Speaker 2: brother in the same grade, reached out to me and

771
00:35:03,160 --> 00:35:04,880
Speaker 2: said that she heard that my sister was seeing a

772
00:35:04,920 --> 00:35:09,680
Speaker 2: sketchy guy from another's school. Apparently he sells substances and

773
00:35:09,840 --> 00:35:12,319
Speaker 2: was expelled from my sister's high school. I asked my

774
00:35:12,400 --> 00:35:15,239
Speaker 2: sister about this and she denied it. Last week, I

775
00:35:15,280 --> 00:35:17,440
Speaker 2: got a phone call from my mom who was sobbing.

776
00:35:17,520 --> 00:35:19,920
Speaker 2: She tells me that my sister is pregnant. I was

777
00:35:20,000 --> 00:35:22,080
Speaker 2: so shocked. That I could not speak. Then I was

778
00:35:22,120 --> 00:35:24,799
Speaker 2: angry when I was her age and even younger. I

779
00:35:24,880 --> 00:35:27,680
Speaker 2: gave her everything, and so did my parents, so she

780
00:35:27,680 --> 00:35:30,279
Speaker 2: could have all the opportunities her peers had since my

781
00:35:30,360 --> 00:35:34,280
Speaker 2: dad's business became lucrative. They've given her every opportunity to succeed.

782
00:35:34,480 --> 00:35:39,240
Speaker 2: Any extracurricular sport she wants, academic tutoring, school activities, et cetera.

783
00:35:39,400 --> 00:35:41,640
Speaker 2: I never got any of those things. It angered me

784
00:35:41,760 --> 00:35:43,880
Speaker 2: so much that she took all of this for granted

785
00:35:43,960 --> 00:35:46,920
Speaker 2: and efed up her life. The father her delinquent boyfriend,

786
00:35:46,960 --> 00:35:51,440
Speaker 2: who got expelled and sold substances. She blows up my phone,

787
00:35:51,640 --> 00:35:53,840
Speaker 2: but I don't respond. She then sends me a series

788
00:35:53,880 --> 00:35:56,359
Speaker 2: of long text messages asking if she can crash at

789
00:35:56,400 --> 00:35:58,239
Speaker 2: my place. She also asked me if I could make

790
00:35:58,280 --> 00:36:01,000
Speaker 2: her an appointment to see a doctor. Lastly, she asks

791
00:36:01,040 --> 00:36:03,040
Speaker 2: if it would be okay if her boyfriend comes and

792
00:36:03,080 --> 00:36:06,120
Speaker 2: stays over. Sometimes I understand like letting her stay.

793
00:36:06,160 --> 00:36:09,640
Speaker 1: This sister stay over she wants even if you guys

794
00:36:09,640 --> 00:36:11,439
Speaker 1: are on, like, eh, yeah.

795
00:36:11,120 --> 00:36:13,040
Speaker 3: I still, I mean, I still sister would want to

796
00:36:13,120 --> 00:36:14,280
Speaker 3: be there for your Yeah.

797
00:36:14,320 --> 00:36:17,480
Speaker 1: But the boyfriend a sketchy boyfriend.

798
00:36:17,280 --> 00:36:20,319
Speaker 2: Who who's who's a dealer. I shut her down. I

799
00:36:20,360 --> 00:36:22,680
Speaker 2: told her that you dug this hole for yourself. If

800
00:36:22,680 --> 00:36:25,200
Speaker 2: you allowed yourself to become pregnant, then you should be

801
00:36:25,200 --> 00:36:28,239
Speaker 2: able to deal with the consequences. I mean, I understand why.

802
00:36:28,239 --> 00:36:29,960
Speaker 2: I hope he is saying this because she's eighteen.

803
00:36:30,320 --> 00:36:34,439
Speaker 1: Yeah, but but not the way to go about I mean, like, at.

804
00:36:34,400 --> 00:36:36,360
Speaker 3: Least her parents should be. She's not an adult.

805
00:36:36,400 --> 00:36:38,360
Speaker 1: She doesn't know what She's so naive. I mean, you

806
00:36:38,360 --> 00:36:40,799
Speaker 1: can tell that from just her be like, ah, I'm

807
00:36:40,840 --> 00:36:43,520
Speaker 1: the cool kid an adult. Yeah, two high schoolers do.

808
00:36:43,960 --> 00:36:44,240
Speaker 3: Also.

809
00:36:44,280 --> 00:36:47,400
Speaker 2: I'm currently sharing a small apartment with two roommates. She

810
00:36:47,480 --> 00:36:49,640
Speaker 2: begged some more and I denied her. In the past

811
00:36:49,719 --> 00:36:52,480
Speaker 2: few days, she's been texting me and calling me NonStop,

812
00:36:52,600 --> 00:36:54,279
Speaker 2: saying that she has nowhere to go and has been

813
00:36:54,320 --> 00:36:57,000
Speaker 2: living in her boyfriend's car. I haven't responded to a

814
00:36:57,040 --> 00:36:59,680
Speaker 2: single message of hers, but I feel my resolve wavering

815
00:36:59,680 --> 00:37:02,879
Speaker 2: a bit. I fully don't support her, but maybe I'm

816
00:37:02,920 --> 00:37:04,960
Speaker 2: an a hole. And there are two edits in an update,

817
00:37:05,000 --> 00:37:07,000
Speaker 2: so we'll read those edits and then get into the update.

818
00:37:07,080 --> 00:37:10,000
Speaker 2: Edit says to clarify I would still never house her

819
00:37:10,080 --> 00:37:13,000
Speaker 2: in my apartment that would be extremely disrespectful towards my

820
00:37:13,080 --> 00:37:15,040
Speaker 2: roommates and would get me kicked out due to the

821
00:37:15,080 --> 00:37:17,760
Speaker 2: least agreement I meant, I was considering giving and sending

822
00:37:17,800 --> 00:37:20,759
Speaker 2: her some money. Edit to my parents have disowned her,

823
00:37:21,160 --> 00:37:23,680
Speaker 2: not kicked her out. They are refusing to acknowledge that

824
00:37:23,719 --> 00:37:25,719
Speaker 2: she is their daughter, but she is still welcome to

825
00:37:25,719 --> 00:37:29,160
Speaker 2: live in their house. Interesting, Wait, what, you're not our daughter,

826
00:37:29,239 --> 00:37:31,200
Speaker 2: but you can live here. She chose not to since

827
00:37:31,239 --> 00:37:34,160
Speaker 2: my parents are absolutely fuming and probably will yell at

828
00:37:34,200 --> 00:37:36,360
Speaker 2: her and criticize her, which she honestly needs.

829
00:37:36,560 --> 00:37:39,279
Speaker 1: I would say, take the yelling in the criticism. Yeah,

830
00:37:39,440 --> 00:37:41,359
Speaker 1: rather than living in a car, get a roof over

831
00:37:41,400 --> 00:37:41,759
Speaker 1: your head.

832
00:37:41,800 --> 00:37:44,080
Speaker 3: And I feel really bad.

833
00:37:44,320 --> 00:37:46,600
Speaker 2: I mean, obviously I don't think OP necessarily has a

834
00:37:46,640 --> 00:37:49,560
Speaker 2: responsibility to house her, especially in the living situations.

835
00:37:50,080 --> 00:37:53,719
Speaker 1: Yeah, especially the situation where mats and then also losing

836
00:37:53,800 --> 00:37:55,239
Speaker 1: the lease or Yeah, you.

837
00:37:55,600 --> 00:37:57,400
Speaker 2: Just like a lot of stuff that she shouldn't have

838
00:37:57,440 --> 00:37:58,479
Speaker 2: to handle as an eighteen year.

839
00:37:58,400 --> 00:38:00,600
Speaker 1: Old, which I thought that maybe crash Houch wants in

840
00:38:00,640 --> 00:38:03,080
Speaker 1: a blue moon, but not stay with you entirely.

841
00:38:03,320 --> 00:38:06,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, but I feel bad for this sixteen year old because,

842
00:38:06,280 --> 00:38:09,040
Speaker 2: like on the one hand, I understand that a lot

843
00:38:09,040 --> 00:38:11,200
Speaker 2: of parents would see this and be like, well, you're

844
00:38:11,239 --> 00:38:13,560
Speaker 2: so irresponsible and you have to deal with the consequences.

845
00:38:13,719 --> 00:38:16,680
Speaker 1: We give you everything, Yeah, you took it for granted way.

846
00:38:16,600 --> 00:38:19,279
Speaker 2: And blah blah blah. But there is another update. It's

847
00:38:19,320 --> 00:38:21,160
Speaker 2: been a little bit more than two weeks since my

848
00:38:21,239 --> 00:38:23,319
Speaker 2: first post, and I guess it's safe to say now

849
00:38:23,440 --> 00:38:26,360
Speaker 2: that the situation has been resolved, oh, in probably the

850
00:38:26,400 --> 00:38:29,600
Speaker 2: best way possible. Okay, okay. In my last post, I

851
00:38:29,680 --> 00:38:31,760
Speaker 2: stated that my sister was still living in her car

852
00:38:31,840 --> 00:38:35,239
Speaker 2: of her delinquent boyfriend who sells drug and was refusing

853
00:38:35,280 --> 00:38:37,600
Speaker 2: to come home because my parents had disowned her. At

854
00:38:37,600 --> 00:38:39,840
Speaker 2: this point, I would like to clarify that my family

855
00:38:39,840 --> 00:38:42,320
Speaker 2: and I are Chinese, and it is common in Chinese

856
00:38:42,360 --> 00:38:44,719
Speaker 2: culture to disown your kids when they do something that

857
00:38:44,840 --> 00:38:48,160
Speaker 2: largely disappoints you or embarrasses you. However, this is not

858
00:38:48,280 --> 00:38:50,640
Speaker 2: a permanent disownment like many of you have brought up.

859
00:38:50,760 --> 00:38:53,719
Speaker 2: As long as my sister apologizes sincerely and they can

860
00:38:53,760 --> 00:38:56,000
Speaker 2: see that she is actively trying to fix her mistake

861
00:38:56,080 --> 00:38:59,000
Speaker 2: and become better, they will take her back as their daughter.

862
00:38:59,120 --> 00:39:02,040
Speaker 2: Another clarification would be for those people who assumed that

863
00:39:02,080 --> 00:39:04,200
Speaker 2: my dad kept us poor since he was stubborn and

864
00:39:04,200 --> 00:39:05,960
Speaker 2: wanted to work on his business and not get a

865
00:39:05,960 --> 00:39:08,640
Speaker 2: real job. His business was a passion project. On the side,

866
00:39:08,760 --> 00:39:11,640
Speaker 2: my dad was working fifty hours a week at two jobs.

867
00:39:11,680 --> 00:39:14,200
Speaker 2: So it does seem kind of like the sister is stubborn,

868
00:39:14,239 --> 00:39:17,200
Speaker 2: alrighty on to what ultimately happened with my sister. Despite

869
00:39:17,239 --> 00:39:19,680
Speaker 2: the chain of advice I sent her, she ignored me.

870
00:39:19,760 --> 00:39:20,719
Speaker 1: Still stubborn.

871
00:39:20,880 --> 00:39:23,239
Speaker 2: I regularly checked in with her over the next week

872
00:39:23,320 --> 00:39:25,120
Speaker 2: to see how she was, and she gave me one

873
00:39:25,160 --> 00:39:28,280
Speaker 2: word replies until they ultimately stopped. I was growing concern

874
00:39:28,440 --> 00:39:30,319
Speaker 2: after she didn't pick up her cell, but then I

875
00:39:30,360 --> 00:39:33,000
Speaker 2: received a call from my parents. According to my mom,

876
00:39:33,160 --> 00:39:37,719
Speaker 2: my sister has returned home crying and begging for forgiveness.

877
00:39:38,080 --> 00:39:39,759
Speaker 1: You didn't even need to do that. Yeah, you could

878
00:39:39,760 --> 00:39:42,080
Speaker 1: have just been like, I'm sorry, please help me.

879
00:39:42,480 --> 00:39:44,000
Speaker 3: She has been through a lot, she was living in

880
00:39:44,000 --> 00:39:45,240
Speaker 3: a car, she's pregnant.

881
00:39:45,480 --> 00:39:48,239
Speaker 1: But again, all she needed to do is just apologize.

882
00:39:48,480 --> 00:39:49,840
Speaker 1: That's all it took. You just had a lot of

883
00:39:49,880 --> 00:39:52,160
Speaker 1: pride for some reason. I guess he sometimes it just

884
00:39:52,200 --> 00:39:53,160
Speaker 1: has to bonky on the head.

885
00:39:53,360 --> 00:39:54,879
Speaker 3: I really got a boku on the head to figure

886
00:39:54,920 --> 00:39:55,120
Speaker 3: it out.

887
00:39:55,200 --> 00:39:57,279
Speaker 2: Yeah, she had a serious talk with my parents where

888
00:39:57,280 --> 00:39:59,759
Speaker 2: she apologized for her behavior and promised to make a

889
00:39:59,800 --> 00:40:02,880
Speaker 2: mand let's go. My mom was very tearful as well.

890
00:40:03,040 --> 00:40:05,400
Speaker 2: They schedule the doctor's appointment for her immediately, and I

891
00:40:05,440 --> 00:40:06,759
Speaker 2: believe she went in the next day.

892
00:40:06,880 --> 00:40:09,120
Speaker 1: Wow. The parents, I'm telling you, the parents were They

893
00:40:09,520 --> 00:40:12,160
Speaker 1: were just like, you need to learn your lesson. Yeah.

894
00:40:12,200 --> 00:40:14,319
Speaker 1: I feel like they know, like they all know, Like

895
00:40:14,560 --> 00:40:17,080
Speaker 1: she's just not going to get it until she gets it.

896
00:40:17,160 --> 00:40:18,120
Speaker 1: And she got it finally.

897
00:40:18,239 --> 00:40:20,440
Speaker 3: I have no idea what made her finally break and

898
00:40:20,480 --> 00:40:22,520
Speaker 3: return home, So I texted her first.

899
00:40:22,520 --> 00:40:24,240
Speaker 2: I told her I was proud of her for taking

900
00:40:24,280 --> 00:40:27,160
Speaker 2: action and being mature, and asked her if anything happened

901
00:40:27,160 --> 00:40:29,600
Speaker 2: between her and her boyfriend. At first, she was pretty

902
00:40:29,640 --> 00:40:32,719
Speaker 2: stubborn and kept insisting that she was just over living

903
00:40:32,719 --> 00:40:35,840
Speaker 2: in a car, But after a while, she finally admitted

904
00:40:35,880 --> 00:40:38,520
Speaker 2: that her boyfriend had requested that she starts selling for

905
00:40:38,640 --> 00:40:41,000
Speaker 2: him if she wanted to keep living in his car.

906
00:40:41,160 --> 00:40:42,279
Speaker 1: Oh my didn't do that.

907
00:40:42,320 --> 00:40:44,160
Speaker 3: He was sneaking her so wanted her to become a

908
00:40:44,200 --> 00:40:45,000
Speaker 3: dealer's one.

909
00:40:45,080 --> 00:40:46,360
Speaker 1: There it is LMAO.

910
00:40:46,640 --> 00:40:47,719
Speaker 3: What an fing a hole.

911
00:40:48,000 --> 00:40:50,959
Speaker 2: Glad my sister finally returned to her senses, she told

912
00:40:50,960 --> 00:40:53,040
Speaker 2: me she broke it off with him, and I sincerely

913
00:40:53,120 --> 00:40:55,880
Speaker 2: hope that's the truth. This past Monday, she got the

914
00:40:55,880 --> 00:40:59,359
Speaker 2: pills to successfully terminate her pregnancy. According to my mom,

915
00:40:59,400 --> 00:41:01,879
Speaker 2: she was that they do at asap, which was really

916
00:41:01,960 --> 00:41:03,799
Speaker 2: a breath of relief for all of us because we

917
00:41:03,800 --> 00:41:06,200
Speaker 2: were worried she might want to keep it, which I think.

918
00:41:06,400 --> 00:41:08,960
Speaker 2: I think she really was not ready for this. I mean,

919
00:41:09,440 --> 00:41:11,080
Speaker 2: what sixteen year old is ready?

920
00:41:11,440 --> 00:41:13,520
Speaker 3: Yeah, for a child. But I'm glad that her parents

921
00:41:13,520 --> 00:41:15,319
Speaker 3: seemed to be supportive of her in this.

922
00:41:15,640 --> 00:41:19,359
Speaker 1: I think again, because it was such a cultural difference. Yeah,

923
00:41:19,400 --> 00:41:22,680
Speaker 1: with them being Chinese. When we heard disowned, we're like whoa.

924
00:41:22,680 --> 00:41:25,160
Speaker 1: But as Op stated, it's like just a it's actually

925
00:41:25,200 --> 00:41:26,160
Speaker 1: a very common thing.

926
00:41:26,320 --> 00:41:27,320
Speaker 3: You've been grounded.

927
00:41:27,520 --> 00:41:31,319
Speaker 1: Yeah, pretty much your grounded. Just say you're sorry and

928
00:41:31,360 --> 00:41:34,080
Speaker 1: you we're all back to family. Yeah, I think, And

929
00:41:34,120 --> 00:41:37,400
Speaker 1: it was reiterated ironically that she's stubborn and she she

930
00:41:37,560 --> 00:41:40,080
Speaker 1: just finally hit her and she understood, And I think

931
00:41:40,080 --> 00:41:41,520
Speaker 1: that's you just grow from there.

932
00:41:41,480 --> 00:41:43,800
Speaker 2: You know what, you can help us grow our lives

933
00:41:43,880 --> 00:41:45,680
Speaker 2: every week to at three pm PSD just to have

934
00:41:45,719 --> 00:41:48,839
Speaker 2: her profile. The future seems pretty bright right now for her.

935
00:41:49,120 --> 00:41:51,400
Speaker 2: My parents decided to pull her out of the public

936
00:41:51,440 --> 00:41:54,080
Speaker 2: school and send her to a progressive private school that

937
00:41:54,160 --> 00:41:56,560
Speaker 2: some of my close friends also went to. Nice It's

938
00:41:56,560 --> 00:41:58,960
Speaker 2: a fantastic school, and I think it'd be great for her.

939
00:41:59,040 --> 00:42:01,839
Speaker 2: She's officially started next Monday. I'm going to visit her

940
00:42:01,920 --> 00:42:04,120
Speaker 2: and my family this weekend and see how she's doing.

941
00:42:04,280 --> 00:42:06,319
Speaker 2: Edit forgot to add that the new school also has

942
00:42:06,360 --> 00:42:09,120
Speaker 2: a wonderful counseling department. I urged my parents to speak

943
00:42:09,160 --> 00:42:11,200
Speaker 2: to the head psychologist there and they did, and she

944
00:42:11,320 --> 00:42:14,000
Speaker 2: will be having mandatory weekly meetings with her and.

945
00:42:14,000 --> 00:42:17,000
Speaker 3: Another therapist at the school. What a great turnaround.

946
00:42:17,000 --> 00:42:17,680
Speaker 1: Great turnaround.

947
00:42:17,760 --> 00:42:19,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, I was like, oh no, I feel so badly

948
00:42:19,360 --> 00:42:21,759
Speaker 2: for and then everything is fine. She's going to this

949
00:42:21,800 --> 00:42:23,680
Speaker 2: private school, which is I mean, like, it's great because

950
00:42:23,719 --> 00:42:26,719
Speaker 2: it seems like the whole thing was that the parents had.

951
00:42:26,520 --> 00:42:29,080
Speaker 1: More money to, you know, to expend on.

952
00:42:29,400 --> 00:42:31,440
Speaker 3: On the second daughter, and it seems like now she's

953
00:42:31,480 --> 00:42:32,240
Speaker 3: finally able.

954
00:42:32,080 --> 00:42:34,480
Speaker 1: To use all of those resources, which is great. And OPI,

955
00:42:34,760 --> 00:42:36,640
Speaker 1: in the situation that you were in, I think you

956
00:42:36,680 --> 00:42:38,879
Speaker 1: did the best you could have done you like, hey,

957
00:42:39,040 --> 00:42:41,520
Speaker 1: you offered advice. Yes, you tried to be sisterly and

958
00:42:41,719 --> 00:42:43,560
Speaker 1: you know, did the best you could. You couldn't do

959
00:42:43,600 --> 00:42:45,319
Speaker 1: anything ouse side. Yeah, you can't house her. You could

960
00:42:45,360 --> 00:42:46,680
Speaker 1: maybe you have her stay on the couch for a

961
00:42:46,680 --> 00:42:49,600
Speaker 1: couple days. But that's it again, great overall, amazing that

962
00:42:49,719 --> 00:42:51,879
Speaker 1: that's worked out, like you said, perfectly in the best

963
00:42:51,880 --> 00:42:52,480
Speaker 1: way possible.

964
00:42:52,520 --> 00:42:54,920
Speaker 3: But that's the end of that story, so we'll see

965
00:42:54,960 --> 00:42:55,440
Speaker 3: you next time.

966
00:42:55,480 --> 00:42:58,920
Speaker 1: Sea. I yelled at my pregnant sister for treating me

967
00:42:59,120 --> 00:43:02,920
Speaker 1: like her may She insisted she was just nesting. I

968
00:43:02,960 --> 00:43:06,080
Speaker 1: want to know more nesting, all right, mama bird. Hey y'all,

969
00:43:06,239 --> 00:43:08,279
Speaker 1: I'm from the UK and have been traveling for a

970
00:43:08,320 --> 00:43:12,840
Speaker 1: couple years around the world Japan, US, Southeast Asia, Australia

971
00:43:12,880 --> 00:43:15,319
Speaker 1: and New Zealand. Pretty expensive to do, but the most

972
00:43:15,360 --> 00:43:19,080
Speaker 1: expensive was attending my twin sister's wedding in Bali when

973
00:43:19,120 --> 00:43:23,359
Speaker 1: she got married. It was lovely, but so over our

974
00:43:23,560 --> 00:43:26,319
Speaker 1: usual budget. I mean, your traveling the world, it's gonna

975
00:43:26,320 --> 00:43:28,880
Speaker 1: be a little pricey. But let's see why it was

976
00:43:28,920 --> 00:43:32,319
Speaker 1: so pricey. By the way, this comes from user Womble six'

977
00:43:32,440 --> 00:43:35,120
Speaker 1: one nine on the r slash ok storytime suburt. It

978
00:43:35,239 --> 00:43:38,319
Speaker 1: so flash forward six months And i'm going out of

979
00:43:38,360 --> 00:43:40,400
Speaker 1: my way to return to THE uk to see my

980
00:43:40,480 --> 00:43:42,720
Speaker 1: twin sister and stay at theirs for a few. Weeks

981
00:43:42,840 --> 00:43:45,399
Speaker 1: during this, time she got pregnant and is now four

982
00:43:45,440 --> 00:43:47,600
Speaker 1: to five months. Pregnant and ALL i can say Is.

983
00:43:47,680 --> 00:43:50,960
Speaker 1: Wow things were intense from the MOMENT i. LANDED i

984
00:43:51,040 --> 00:43:54,719
Speaker 1: was in a storm of, tension arguments and battling over

985
00:43:54,880 --> 00:43:58,440
Speaker 1: WHAT i consider the, smallest slash dumbest crap. Ever i'm

986
00:43:58,440 --> 00:44:02,359
Speaker 1: talking about yelling between c and husband over shelves going

987
00:44:02,440 --> 00:44:04,640
Speaker 1: up while is not being painted in, time the type

988
00:44:04,640 --> 00:44:07,279
Speaker 1: of crib they should, buy who isn't contributing, enough et,

989
00:44:07,400 --> 00:44:08,000
Speaker 1: cetera et.

990
00:44:08,120 --> 00:44:10,839
Speaker 2: Cetera so like awkward to be in a. House it's

991
00:44:10,840 --> 00:44:12,760
Speaker 2: not like a couple that's finding your pregnant.

992
00:44:12,800 --> 00:44:14,880
Speaker 1: Sister, YEAH i feel like you want, to like you,

993
00:44:14,920 --> 00:44:16,200
Speaker 1: know when you're like you want to pat someone on

994
00:44:16,200 --> 00:44:18,640
Speaker 1: the back and they're, like, ah don't touch bit. You,

995
00:44:18,840 --> 00:44:21,080
Speaker 1: yeah that's THAT'S i, think like that's the sister right,

996
00:44:21,120 --> 00:44:23,680
Speaker 1: Now AND i feel like it's a triple the. Monster

997
00:44:23,880 --> 00:44:26,680
Speaker 1: they both go tit for tat. Endlessly BUT i would

998
00:44:26,719 --> 00:44:29,960
Speaker 1: say my sister is a bit. Worse she calls it, nesting,

999
00:44:30,200 --> 00:44:31,080
Speaker 1: oh because.

1000
00:44:30,920 --> 00:44:33,759
Speaker 2: She's like it has to be, perfect like everything for

1001
00:44:33,800 --> 00:44:35,640
Speaker 2: the baby needs to be, perfect and so she's like

1002
00:44:35,680 --> 00:44:38,160
Speaker 2: so on top of it and so like nitpicky about.

1003
00:44:38,160 --> 00:44:39,840
Speaker 1: It that's a good, guess let's see which to my,

1004
00:44:39,920 --> 00:44:42,759
Speaker 1: understanding does it even happen for all women and only

1005
00:44:42,880 --> 00:44:45,800
Speaker 1: curs at later stages of pregnancy where you are preparing

1006
00:44:45,880 --> 00:44:48,440
Speaker 1: your home for an upcoming. Child it all just seemed

1007
00:44:48,440 --> 00:44:51,799
Speaker 1: a justification for her to be even more tyrannical about

1008
00:44:51,840 --> 00:44:54,719
Speaker 1: stuff around the, house as she has always been such a,

1009
00:44:54,760 --> 00:44:55,879
Speaker 1: perfectionist neat.

1010
00:44:55,920 --> 00:44:59,160
Speaker 2: Type, sure maybe she's, nesting and she probably has like

1011
00:44:59,239 --> 00:45:01,080
Speaker 2: some of the pregnancy hormones and stuff that are making,

1012
00:45:01,160 --> 00:45:02,960
Speaker 2: It but it does feel like when people are, like,

1013
00:45:03,000 --> 00:45:03,600
Speaker 2: Oh i'm just so.

1014
00:45:03,800 --> 00:45:07,560
Speaker 1: Ocd, anyway that's an issue between. THEM i thought best

1015
00:45:07,600 --> 00:45:08,960
Speaker 1: not to get. Involved you're gonna.

1016
00:45:08,760 --> 00:45:10,280
Speaker 3: Get, Involved, yeah they're gonna involve.

1017
00:45:10,280 --> 00:45:13,520
Speaker 1: You what really, kicked, though is is as soon AS i,

1018
00:45:13,640 --> 00:45:17,720
Speaker 1: LANDED i was bombarded with. Demands, no it's no longer

1019
00:45:17,800 --> 00:45:20,000
Speaker 1: your fun trip. ANYMORE i had just got off a

1020
00:45:20,000 --> 00:45:22,839
Speaker 1: forty seven hour flight, journey jet lagged all as, hell

1021
00:45:23,000 --> 00:45:25,359
Speaker 1: and within a few, HOURS i was questioned over why

1022
00:45:25,480 --> 00:45:28,200
Speaker 1: my suitcase was still out and not packed. Away, okay,

1023
00:45:28,280 --> 00:45:31,600
Speaker 1: whatever she just got. There Then i'm demanded into the

1024
00:45:31,719 --> 00:45:35,120
Speaker 1: kitchen to help cook and. Clean oh my, god not

1025
00:45:35,160 --> 00:45:37,399
Speaker 1: in a pleasant or fun, way like we are letting

1026
00:45:37,440 --> 00:45:39,600
Speaker 1: you stay, here you better pull your weight kind of.

1027
00:45:39,640 --> 00:45:42,640
Speaker 2: Way oh my, god isn't Op LIKE i don't. KNOW

1028
00:45:42,680 --> 00:45:44,480
Speaker 2: i feel Like ope's there for, them but.

1029
00:45:44,600 --> 00:45:45,640
Speaker 1: COULD i just have a breather.

1030
00:45:45,760 --> 00:45:45,960
Speaker 3: Day?

1031
00:45:46,160 --> 00:45:47,960
Speaker 1: YEAH i just got like.

1032
00:45:47,920 --> 00:45:49,920
Speaker 3: She's doing something nice for them and they're just kind

1033
00:45:49,920 --> 00:45:50,440
Speaker 3: of abusing.

1034
00:45:50,480 --> 00:45:53,640
Speaker 1: Her Now i'm super. Exhausted but then told at ten

1035
00:45:53,680 --> 00:45:56,360
Speaker 1: pm at, NIGHT i need to help take every single

1036
00:45:56,520 --> 00:45:58,920
Speaker 1: item out the loft to help clear space for the

1037
00:45:58,960 --> 00:45:59,520
Speaker 1: future baby.

1038
00:45:59,520 --> 00:46:02,719
Speaker 2: Stuff what is this baby coming? Tomorrow because OTHERWISE i

1039
00:46:02,880 --> 00:46:05,160
Speaker 2: was like four or five months. Pregnant, yeah what is going?

1040
00:46:05,239 --> 00:46:10,160
Speaker 1: On we are at this for, hours lugging, boxes, bags, cases,

1041
00:46:10,320 --> 00:46:14,480
Speaker 1: Guitars christmas, decorations you name, it covered in dust and so.

1042
00:46:14,680 --> 00:46:17,160
Speaker 1: TIRED i get down from the loft and my sister

1043
00:46:17,200 --> 00:46:19,799
Speaker 1: practically shrieked at me those need to be taken down

1044
00:46:19,840 --> 00:46:20,120
Speaker 1: to the.

1045
00:46:20,239 --> 00:46:21,279
Speaker 3: KITCHEN i would.

1046
00:46:21,760 --> 00:46:24,440
Speaker 1: LEAVE i would just drop. Everything i'm, Like i'm going

1047
00:46:24,600 --> 00:46:27,400
Speaker 1: their house is three floors And i'm still panting from the.

1048
00:46:27,440 --> 00:46:29,840
Speaker 1: Loft this is WHERE i lose my first bit of.

1049
00:46:29,880 --> 00:46:32,640
Speaker 1: Patience not in a big. WAY i just, say, OKAY

1050
00:46:32,880 --> 00:46:36,040
Speaker 1: i Will jesus just give me a sec to recalibrate.

1051
00:46:36,120 --> 00:46:40,439
Speaker 1: Here my sister responds along the lines, of so you're

1052
00:46:40,440 --> 00:46:42,840
Speaker 1: not going to, hell come, on just do it and be.

1053
00:46:42,960 --> 00:46:46,440
Speaker 3: Supportive oh my, god this is so.

1054
00:46:46,560 --> 00:46:49,840
Speaker 1: INFURIATING i would drop. Everything i'm, Like i'm here to,

1055
00:46:49,880 --> 00:46:51,759
Speaker 1: help and you are treating the help like it you're treating.

1056
00:46:51,800 --> 00:46:55,319
Speaker 1: ME i get irate AND i, SAY i am being,

1057
00:46:55,320 --> 00:46:58,200
Speaker 1: supportive but you need to start chilling out and asking.

1058
00:46:58,280 --> 00:47:00,560
Speaker 1: Nicely this is way too.

1059
00:47:00,640 --> 00:47:03,680
Speaker 3: Much put your brother's in. Place come, on she's not.

1060
00:47:03,840 --> 00:47:07,480
Speaker 1: Respecting she's not the king of. Kings she hated that

1061
00:47:07,520 --> 00:47:09,799
Speaker 1: and held it against. Me days went on And i've

1062
00:47:09,840 --> 00:47:14,440
Speaker 1: been roped into every task, imaginable from moving, woodpiles, sheds

1063
00:47:14,840 --> 00:47:18,200
Speaker 1: multiple deep cleans of the, house and even disassembling a

1064
00:47:18,280 --> 00:47:20,800
Speaker 1: wardrobe with a. Friend my mate came over and spent

1065
00:47:20,840 --> 00:47:22,719
Speaker 1: a good couple hours at this. THING i made him

1066
00:47:22,719 --> 00:47:25,040
Speaker 1: a coffee for his, work just to get nagged at

1067
00:47:25,160 --> 00:47:28,640
Speaker 1: THAT i had left coffee mugs in the sink one

1068
00:47:28,640 --> 00:47:29,920
Speaker 1: of the coffee mugs in the sink could to do

1069
00:47:30,000 --> 00:47:32,439
Speaker 1: to affect the. Baby she even said the house needed

1070
00:47:32,480 --> 00:47:34,879
Speaker 1: to be spotless for the delivery guy who was going

1071
00:47:34,880 --> 00:47:38,640
Speaker 1: to be collecting the, wardrobe who never even entered the house.

1072
00:47:38,920 --> 00:47:43,399
Speaker 1: Anyways within four to five days of being, BACK i felt, stressed, disappointed,

1073
00:47:43,640 --> 00:47:46,440
Speaker 1: used and FRANKLY i was. HURT i even had snide

1074
00:47:46,440 --> 00:47:50,080
Speaker 1: comments made about me not paying rent during the short.

1075
00:47:50,160 --> 00:47:53,719
Speaker 3: Visit paying rent this is, ridiculous.

1076
00:47:53,320 --> 00:47:56,080
Speaker 1: Even AFTER i had paid big bucks for their, wedding

1077
00:47:56,280 --> 00:47:59,239
Speaker 1: a credit card debt me and my girlfriend will be

1078
00:47:59,280 --> 00:48:02,399
Speaker 1: paying off for a good, year plus the flights to see.

1079
00:48:02,440 --> 00:48:05,239
Speaker 1: Them this got the response OF o f off with

1080
00:48:05,320 --> 00:48:08,279
Speaker 1: That you've been traveling, everywhere but it's our wedding that

1081
00:48:08,400 --> 00:48:11,720
Speaker 1: broke the. BANK i simply, Said i'm not guilt tripping.

1082
00:48:11,760 --> 00:48:14,960
Speaker 1: You i'm just SAYING i didn't know you needed rent

1083
00:48:15,000 --> 00:48:17,799
Speaker 1: paying And i'm just a bit depleted financially from the,

1084
00:48:17,840 --> 00:48:21,640
Speaker 1: wedding is All her. Response, well then you just shouldn't

1085
00:48:21,640 --> 00:48:25,440
Speaker 1: have come ouch ak spent being at her wedding six months.

1086
00:48:25,440 --> 00:48:28,040
Speaker 1: Prior but Now i'm made to feel guilty BECAUSE i

1087
00:48:28,080 --> 00:48:30,080
Speaker 1: didn't THINK i need to pay rent for staying a

1088
00:48:30,120 --> 00:48:33,480
Speaker 1: few weeks more of this and being berated over WHAT

1089
00:48:33,600 --> 00:48:37,800
Speaker 1: i consider incredibly excessive clean freak. Episodes eventually it got

1090
00:48:37,840 --> 00:48:40,520
Speaker 1: too much AND i ended up yelling at. HER i

1091
00:48:40,560 --> 00:48:43,799
Speaker 1: said how they were living and acting was effing, ridiculous

1092
00:48:43,920 --> 00:48:47,239
Speaker 1: that all of this exsessive materialistic attachment is, unhealthy and

1093
00:48:47,320 --> 00:48:50,040
Speaker 1: that any child coming into this won't give a damn

1094
00:48:50,080 --> 00:48:51,880
Speaker 1: about the color of a wall or shape of a.

1095
00:48:51,920 --> 00:48:54,759
Speaker 1: Crib they will care about being around arguing parents or

1096
00:48:54,800 --> 00:48:58,160
Speaker 1: behaving insanely and constantly at each other's. Throats, yeah they need.

1097
00:48:58,200 --> 00:48:59,920
Speaker 3: To those parents need to figure it out before they

1098
00:49:00,080 --> 00:49:00,920
Speaker 3: put their kid through.

1099
00:49:00,920 --> 00:49:04,160
Speaker 1: That she started, Screeching, ah of course you did. THAT

1100
00:49:04,320 --> 00:49:09,080
Speaker 1: i was being, unsupportive, lazy and. Unappreciative THEN i really yelled.

1101
00:49:09,120 --> 00:49:12,000
Speaker 1: Back i'm not saying this or any personal. Motive i'm

1102
00:49:12,040 --> 00:49:14,799
Speaker 1: telling you this BECAUSE i love you. Guys but the

1103
00:49:14,800 --> 00:49:18,799
Speaker 1: only mother efforts whoever problem going on here is. You

1104
00:49:19,080 --> 00:49:22,520
Speaker 1: my sister proceeded to jump, up scream stop yelling at,

1105
00:49:22,560 --> 00:49:25,319
Speaker 1: me and threw an entire bowl of post out me

1106
00:49:25,520 --> 00:49:27,480
Speaker 1: that bounced off my arm and shattered.

1107
00:49:27,520 --> 00:49:30,440
Speaker 2: Everywhere oh my, god you need to get out of,

1108
00:49:30,440 --> 00:49:31,520
Speaker 2: there because she's been.

1109
00:49:31,640 --> 00:49:36,080
Speaker 1: Aggressive she went upstairs in, hysterics husband in, tow AND

1110
00:49:36,120 --> 00:49:40,160
Speaker 1: i spent the next hour cleaning pasta off the floor and. Wall,

1111
00:49:40,320 --> 00:49:41,279
Speaker 1: WELL i just think that's like.

1112
00:49:41,239 --> 00:49:42,040
Speaker 3: A really bad.

1113
00:49:42,160 --> 00:49:44,680
Speaker 2: Environment you're trying to, Help you're trying to be there

1114
00:49:44,719 --> 00:49:47,439
Speaker 2: for your. Sister she and her husband are, arguing they're

1115
00:49:47,480 --> 00:49:50,839
Speaker 2: not appreciating. You they're demanding all this stuff from you

1116
00:49:51,200 --> 00:49:53,600
Speaker 2: and being really rude when they ask for. It and

1117
00:49:53,640 --> 00:49:56,759
Speaker 2: now she's when you try to express, boundaries she's screaming

1118
00:49:56,800 --> 00:49:58,480
Speaker 2: at you and throwing pasta at.

1119
00:49:58,520 --> 00:49:59,239
Speaker 3: You i'm like a.

1120
00:49:59,280 --> 00:50:01,920
Speaker 2: Bowl, HONESTLY i don't think at this, point even though

1121
00:50:01,920 --> 00:50:04,600
Speaker 2: you love, her you can love her. Afar, YEAH i think.

1122
00:50:04,400 --> 00:50:05,840
Speaker 3: It's honestly hurting both of you.

1123
00:50:05,960 --> 00:50:09,200
Speaker 1: MORE i know this is long and so utterly ridiculous.

1124
00:50:09,480 --> 00:50:12,200
Speaker 1: Sounding there's so much MORE i can't even mention, here

1125
00:50:12,239 --> 00:50:14,520
Speaker 1: But i've been away from their house now and can

1126
00:50:14,520 --> 00:50:17,239
Speaker 1: tell she is genuinely expecting an apology from. ME i

1127
00:50:17,280 --> 00:50:19,239
Speaker 1: wanted to come back and be a supportive, brother but

1128
00:50:19,360 --> 00:50:21,959
Speaker 1: being in that environment with the worst jet Like i've ever,

1129
00:50:22,040 --> 00:50:24,760
Speaker 1: had really just scrambled my. BRAIN i, Mean i've gone.

1130
00:50:24,600 --> 00:50:26,759
Speaker 3: To i've been To australia and Likely i've done.

1131
00:50:26,800 --> 00:50:29,240
Speaker 1: That, yeah you do those, trips those, long long, trips

1132
00:50:29,280 --> 00:50:30,520
Speaker 1: and you come back you're just, LIKE.

1133
00:50:30,440 --> 00:50:30,920
Speaker 3: I can't do.

1134
00:50:30,960 --> 00:50:31,960
Speaker 1: It what time zone is?

1135
00:50:31,960 --> 00:50:34,319
Speaker 2: It and then you have to stay up until like, Ten,

1136
00:50:34,560 --> 00:50:36,520
Speaker 2: yeah so that you're not super, jetlag.

1137
00:50:36,280 --> 00:50:39,520
Speaker 1: But you will come back getting, berated Like i'm this

1138
00:50:39,640 --> 00:50:41,960
Speaker 1: is the Sixth gate Of. Hell it's such a toxic.

1139
00:50:42,080 --> 00:50:44,480
Speaker 1: Environment and no matter how MUCH i try to tell,

1140
00:50:44,480 --> 00:50:46,960
Speaker 1: them they keep denying that the source of their arguing

1141
00:50:47,040 --> 00:50:49,400
Speaker 1: is over petty household. Stuff they don't believe it's an

1142
00:50:49,440 --> 00:50:52,080
Speaker 1: over attachment and that this is what life is and

1143
00:50:52,160 --> 00:50:53,279
Speaker 1: running a household is.

1144
00:50:53,320 --> 00:50:55,839
Speaker 3: About, yeah they need to fix that, Mindset, yeah one hundred.

1145
00:50:55,840 --> 00:50:58,279
Speaker 1: Percent they even proceed to list other clean freaks they

1146
00:50:58,480 --> 00:51:03,000
Speaker 1: know just to justify why they aren't. Excessive let's compare, Ourselves.

1147
00:51:02,680 --> 00:51:05,399
Speaker 2: LIKE i have friends who, literally like like get into,

1148
00:51:05,440 --> 00:51:06,560
Speaker 2: fistfights so we're.

1149
00:51:06,600 --> 00:51:09,840
Speaker 1: Fine one, MORNING i got yelled at for the living

1150
00:51:09,920 --> 00:51:12,359
Speaker 1: room being a total dump after it was my job

1151
00:51:12,400 --> 00:51:14,680
Speaker 1: to clean. IT i looked around a, neat tidy room

1152
00:51:14,760 --> 00:51:17,080
Speaker 1: with no mess and, asked like. What she pointed to

1153
00:51:17,120 --> 00:51:19,400
Speaker 1: a piece of dog toy fluff on the carpet and

1154
00:51:19,440 --> 00:51:21,359
Speaker 1: the cushions not being, plumped not.

1155
00:51:21,440 --> 00:51:22,480
Speaker 3: The fluffing of the.

1156
00:51:22,600 --> 00:51:26,919
Speaker 2: Cushions oh my, god this is the level of crap that's.

1157
00:51:26,960 --> 00:51:29,360
Speaker 1: Happening AM i missing something? Here? Well, actually you, know

1158
00:51:29,480 --> 00:51:31,160
Speaker 1: you do know what you're. Missing you might be missing it.

1159
00:51:31,200 --> 00:51:34,760
Speaker 1: Is we're live every weekday three PM psd on. YouTube

1160
00:51:34,800 --> 00:51:36,880
Speaker 1: just tap that, profile just just tap. It this seems

1161
00:51:36,880 --> 00:51:38,719
Speaker 1: like a span of like, months but this was like

1162
00:51:38,719 --> 00:51:39,839
Speaker 1: a span of maybe four.

1163
00:51:39,960 --> 00:51:42,640
Speaker 2: Days, yeah it doesn't seem LIKE i, mean it was

1164
00:51:42,640 --> 00:51:44,600
Speaker 2: supposed to be a couple of, weeks but it seems

1165
00:51:44,640 --> 00:51:47,919
Speaker 2: like all of this happened pretty early. On and ALSO

1166
00:51:48,040 --> 00:51:50,760
Speaker 2: i think, that like in terms of the asking for rent,

1167
00:51:50,920 --> 00:51:54,720
Speaker 2: THING i think there are circumstances where if you're staying

1168
00:51:54,760 --> 00:51:57,440
Speaker 2: for a, while you can broach, that or if it

1169
00:51:57,480 --> 00:51:59,919
Speaker 2: was brought to help out with like some you're, hoping.

1170
00:52:00,760 --> 00:52:03,200
Speaker 2: Etc but don't like just spring it on.

1171
00:52:03,280 --> 00:52:05,480
Speaker 1: Them Especially, yeah if it wasn't brought up, before it

1172
00:52:05,760 --> 00:52:08,640
Speaker 1: seemed like come, in, YEAH i come help. Out, yeah

1173
00:52:08,840 --> 00:52:09,279
Speaker 1: let's hang.

1174
00:52:09,320 --> 00:52:12,120
Speaker 2: Out like he's kind of already paying for it by

1175
00:52:12,400 --> 00:52:16,359
Speaker 2: helping you. Guys it's not like he's just stay in free.

1176
00:52:16,400 --> 00:52:19,400
Speaker 1: LOADING i did feel bad for. YELLING i know pregnancy

1177
00:52:19,520 --> 00:52:22,319
Speaker 1: has your hormones going through a. Loop the experience has

1178
00:52:22,400 --> 00:52:25,440
Speaker 1: left me rattled and frankly like my relationship with them is.

1179
00:52:25,719 --> 00:52:27,799
Speaker 1: DAMAGED i came back to THE uk to be with,

1180
00:52:27,920 --> 00:52:29,759
Speaker 1: them and NOW i just want to leave because it

1181
00:52:29,800 --> 00:52:32,360
Speaker 1: seems you didn't give a flying f about treating me

1182
00:52:32,440 --> 00:52:34,400
Speaker 1: like a. Person they treating me like an in house

1183
00:52:34,440 --> 00:52:37,439
Speaker 1: made handyman or punching bag for whatever the hell is going?

1184
00:52:37,480 --> 00:52:39,880
Speaker 1: On AM i the a hole for staying in someone's

1185
00:52:39,880 --> 00:52:42,239
Speaker 1: home and challenging their? Rules AM i the a hole

1186
00:52:42,320 --> 00:52:44,360
Speaker 1: for yelling at a pregnant? Woman AM i the a

1187
00:52:44,480 --> 00:52:47,280
Speaker 1: hole for telling them that cleanliness is in a? Virtue

1188
00:52:47,280 --> 00:52:50,120
Speaker 1: when it gets to this, level it's just dysfunction bordering

1189
00:52:50,160 --> 00:52:53,799
Speaker 1: on an. Addiction thanks for making it this, far man.

1190
00:52:53,520 --> 00:52:56,600
Speaker 2: Oh, Man, yeah, NO i think that you just can't

1191
00:52:56,600 --> 00:52:58,440
Speaker 2: be in that. ENVIRONMENT i don't think that you're THE a.

1192
00:52:58,560 --> 00:53:01,560
Speaker 2: HOLE i, MEAN i never support you to like have

1193
00:53:01,680 --> 00:53:03,759
Speaker 2: discussions or, anything because it NEVER i think it never works.

1194
00:53:03,800 --> 00:53:05,799
Speaker 2: Out BUT i do also understand that you've been like

1195
00:53:05,960 --> 00:53:07,640
Speaker 2: pushed and pushed and pushed and, pushed and they were

1196
00:53:07,640 --> 00:53:09,680
Speaker 2: screaming at you and throwing things at, you and at

1197
00:53:09,719 --> 00:53:10,520
Speaker 2: that point you get.

1198
00:53:10,360 --> 00:53:12,319
Speaker 3: Frustrated here's Johnio og.

1199
00:53:12,440 --> 00:53:13,880
Speaker 1: Host. Here we're gonna get back to the, stories but

1200
00:53:13,920 --> 00:53:15,520
Speaker 1: here's a quick three minute break of ass from our.

1201
00:53:15,560 --> 00:53:18,360
Speaker 3: Sponsors i'm cutting off my brother.

1202
00:53:18,600 --> 00:53:24,160
Speaker 2: Forever he stole my girlfriends oh oh. NO i twenty

1203
00:53:24,200 --> 00:53:27,000
Speaker 2: Six mail recently went to a family gathering for my

1204
00:53:27,120 --> 00:53:29,759
Speaker 2: dad's forty ninth. Birthday but BEFORE i get into, that

1205
00:53:29,840 --> 00:53:31,640
Speaker 2: you need to know the backstory with me and my

1206
00:53:31,680 --> 00:53:35,080
Speaker 2: brother twenty Three. Mail this event happened around three years.

1207
00:53:35,120 --> 00:53:37,319
Speaker 2: Ago back, THEN i was dating this girl THAT i

1208
00:53:37,360 --> 00:53:38,759
Speaker 2: will Call kara twenty five.

1209
00:53:38,800 --> 00:53:39,760
Speaker 3: Female by the, way.

1210
00:53:39,600 --> 00:53:41,919
Speaker 2: This comes From Narrow ring five, nine four to three

1211
00:53:41,960 --> 00:53:44,319
Speaker 2: on the air Slash Ookey Storytime. Separate kara AND i

1212
00:53:44,400 --> 00:53:47,440
Speaker 2: were high school. Sweethearts she was my everything at the,

1213
00:53:47,480 --> 00:53:49,799
Speaker 2: time AND i THOUGHT i was. Hers it was Around

1214
00:53:49,840 --> 00:53:52,440
Speaker 2: thanksgiving time WHEN i found. OUT i was shopping for

1215
00:53:52,480 --> 00:53:55,439
Speaker 2: desserts For. Thanksgiving after staying at a friend's house SINCE

1216
00:53:55,480 --> 00:53:57,680
Speaker 2: i was helping them, MOVE i came home and couldn't

1217
00:53:57,719 --> 00:54:00,759
Speaker 2: Find kara or her. STUFF i tried calling, her but

1218
00:54:00,800 --> 00:54:03,560
Speaker 2: it went straight to. VOICEMAIL i tried her, location but

1219
00:54:03,600 --> 00:54:05,440
Speaker 2: it looked like she turned it. OFF i checked my

1220
00:54:05,480 --> 00:54:08,200
Speaker 2: front door cam AND i saw my brother helping her

1221
00:54:08,239 --> 00:54:10,520
Speaker 2: move her things into his car and leaving with.

1222
00:54:10,600 --> 00:54:11,479
Speaker 1: Her, mmm that's.

1223
00:54:11,520 --> 00:54:13,880
Speaker 2: ODD i then tried to call my, brother but he

1224
00:54:13,920 --> 00:54:16,720
Speaker 2: wouldn't answer. Either at this, POINT i started to freak

1225
00:54:16,800 --> 00:54:19,160
Speaker 2: out and assume the, Worst but THEN i thought my

1226
00:54:19,200 --> 00:54:21,840
Speaker 2: brother would never do that to. Me he was honestly

1227
00:54:21,960 --> 00:54:24,200
Speaker 2: like my best friend when we were, kids and even

1228
00:54:24,239 --> 00:54:26,279
Speaker 2: though we drifted apart kind of WHEN i went to,

1229
00:54:26,320 --> 00:54:29,680
Speaker 2: COLLEGE i still considered us best friends since we would

1230
00:54:29,719 --> 00:54:31,840
Speaker 2: still talk and go out from time to. TIME i

1231
00:54:31,880 --> 00:54:34,040
Speaker 2: then called my dad and had my dad tell my

1232
00:54:34,120 --> 00:54:36,360
Speaker 2: mom to call my brother and to put it on speaker.

1233
00:54:36,360 --> 00:54:39,000
Speaker 2: Mode my brother, answered and when my mom asked him

1234
00:54:39,000 --> 00:54:42,200
Speaker 2: Where kara, was he, said she's living with me. Now

1235
00:54:42,480 --> 00:54:45,359
Speaker 2: she broke up With. Opee did they just never tell

1236
00:54:45,400 --> 00:54:46,640
Speaker 2: ope that they were breaking?

1237
00:54:46,760 --> 00:54:49,040
Speaker 3: Up did she just like she just moved?

1238
00:54:49,040 --> 00:54:50,840
Speaker 1: Out she just moved out and moved in with the

1239
00:54:50,880 --> 00:54:51,879
Speaker 1: brother with zero.

1240
00:54:52,000 --> 00:54:54,080
Speaker 2: Contact and if he's, like, hey where are you, at she's, like,

1241
00:54:54,160 --> 00:54:56,640
Speaker 2: yeah we broke, up and he's, like, huh what you?

1242
00:54:56,680 --> 00:54:56,839
Speaker 1: Did?

1243
00:54:56,880 --> 00:55:00,319
Speaker 3: What when did that? HAPPEN i felt numb those.

1244
00:55:00,360 --> 00:55:02,719
Speaker 2: WORDS i thought this was some type of sick, joke

1245
00:55:02,840 --> 00:55:05,640
Speaker 2: SO i checked His facebook And instagram and saw them

1246
00:55:05,680 --> 00:55:08,960
Speaker 2: holding each other and, kissing AND i broke. Down why

1247
00:55:09,200 --> 00:55:11,080
Speaker 2: Was kara doing this to? Me was going through my

1248
00:55:11,120 --> 00:55:14,200
Speaker 2: head all. Night but THEN i was. Angry how could

1249
00:55:14,200 --> 00:55:15,439
Speaker 2: my own, brother.

1250
00:55:15,600 --> 00:55:17,160
Speaker 3: My best, friend do this to.

1251
00:55:17,200 --> 00:55:19,640
Speaker 2: ME i drove up to his house and banged on his,

1252
00:55:19,719 --> 00:55:22,440
Speaker 2: door yelling at him to open, Up But cara was

1253
00:55:22,480 --> 00:55:24,279
Speaker 2: the one that opened the. DOOR i WISH i could

1254
00:55:24,280 --> 00:55:26,520
Speaker 2: say THAT i held it, together BUT i turned into

1255
00:55:26,520 --> 00:55:29,360
Speaker 2: a crying mess ONCE i saw. Her then my brother

1256
00:55:29,440 --> 00:55:32,080
Speaker 2: came from his kitchen and Told caara to go. Upstairs

1257
00:55:32,440 --> 00:55:34,200
Speaker 2: that's when he told me that they were having an

1258
00:55:34,239 --> 00:55:38,279
Speaker 2: affair ever since my second year of college and apologized

1259
00:55:38,320 --> 00:55:41,239
Speaker 2: to me for. It What but Then cara just came

1260
00:55:41,320 --> 00:55:43,319
Speaker 2: back from the stairs and said that the whole reason

1261
00:55:43,360 --> 00:55:45,320
Speaker 2: why she left me the way she did was because

1262
00:55:45,320 --> 00:55:47,479
Speaker 2: she was sick of pretending to love. ME i looked

1263
00:55:47,520 --> 00:55:49,759
Speaker 2: at her and realized that wasn't the PERSON i fell

1264
00:55:49,760 --> 00:55:52,800
Speaker 2: in love. With that was someone. ELSE i then wondered

1265
00:55:52,840 --> 00:55:55,080
Speaker 2: if this was still worth. IT i realized that it

1266
00:55:55,120 --> 00:55:57,959
Speaker 2: wasn't and walked. OUT i, mean, yeah it's not worth

1267
00:55:57,960 --> 00:56:00,279
Speaker 2: it if they literally have been cheating on you.

1268
00:56:00,120 --> 00:56:01,640
Speaker 1: For that for wrong so.

1269
00:56:01,840 --> 00:56:04,440
Speaker 2: Long and then also didn't tell you that they were

1270
00:56:04,440 --> 00:56:06,239
Speaker 2: breaking up with. YOU i tried to not be a

1271
00:56:06,280 --> 00:56:08,880
Speaker 2: problematic person and make a scene WHERE i know WHAT

1272
00:56:08,960 --> 00:56:11,359
Speaker 2: i do won't change the outcome of the. Situation don't

1273
00:56:11,360 --> 00:56:13,600
Speaker 2: get me, WRONG i was beyond mad at her and my,

1274
00:56:13,680 --> 00:56:15,560
Speaker 2: brother AND i cut them out of my.

1275
00:56:15,560 --> 00:56:16,239
Speaker 3: Life on the.

1276
00:56:16,360 --> 00:56:18,480
Speaker 1: Spot there you, Go shall you do? It?

1277
00:56:18,560 --> 00:56:21,080
Speaker 2: Now back to the family. GATHERING i live In california

1278
00:56:21,120 --> 00:56:23,400
Speaker 2: now And i'm still. Single the family gathering was all

1279
00:56:23,480 --> 00:56:26,239
Speaker 2: right until my brother and his wife walked in with a.

1280
00:56:26,400 --> 00:56:30,120
Speaker 2: Stroller apparently they got married and got busyware it. IS

1281
00:56:30,360 --> 00:56:32,920
Speaker 2: i really don't care. Anymore i've been through enough therapy

1282
00:56:32,960 --> 00:56:35,920
Speaker 2: to know That i'm not the. Problem she is big.

1283
00:56:36,000 --> 00:56:38,080
Speaker 2: Time she's so the problem.

1284
00:56:37,680 --> 00:56:39,759
Speaker 1: They replaced you with a, BABY i guess.

1285
00:56:39,760 --> 00:56:42,320
Speaker 2: So my brother was trying to strike up a conversation

1286
00:56:42,400 --> 00:56:44,960
Speaker 2: with me, why BUT i ignored him went back to

1287
00:56:45,000 --> 00:56:46,880
Speaker 2: the CONVERSATION i was having with one of my. Aunts

1288
00:56:47,000 --> 00:56:49,319
Speaker 2: after a couple of, HOURS i forgot they were even.

1289
00:56:49,360 --> 00:56:50,960
Speaker 2: There but WHEN i was heading to the basement to

1290
00:56:51,000 --> 00:56:53,520
Speaker 2: get some ice, cream my brother followed me and nearly

1291
00:56:53,520 --> 00:56:55,800
Speaker 2: gave me a heart. Attack he then awkwardly tried to

1292
00:56:55,840 --> 00:56:57,879
Speaker 2: apologize for what he did to me those three years,

1293
00:56:57,920 --> 00:57:00,719
Speaker 2: ago AND i walked past him to me again that,

1294
00:57:00,840 --> 00:57:03,320
Speaker 2: Night but the next DAY i had gotten multiple texts

1295
00:57:03,360 --> 00:57:05,600
Speaker 2: from my mom telling me to just forgive my brother.

1296
00:57:05,719 --> 00:57:07,200
Speaker 1: Already, no doesn't work like.

1297
00:57:07,239 --> 00:57:09,520
Speaker 2: That my mom and dad are heavy on the religious

1298
00:57:09,560 --> 00:57:12,160
Speaker 2: side and had already forgiven my, brother BUT i. Can't

1299
00:57:12,280 --> 00:57:15,080
Speaker 2: he's the entire reason WHY i trust issues. Now he

1300
00:57:15,160 --> 00:57:17,320
Speaker 2: knew how much she meant to me and still did

1301
00:57:17,360 --> 00:57:20,120
Speaker 2: what he did and expected me to just be okay with.

1302
00:57:20,200 --> 00:57:22,400
Speaker 2: It BUT i don't Think i'll ever forgive. Him AM

1303
00:57:22,440 --> 00:57:25,280
Speaker 2: i The? Ale and there is an update to finish

1304
00:57:25,280 --> 00:57:25,800
Speaker 2: this story.

1305
00:57:25,800 --> 00:57:27,000
Speaker 3: Off you're not The.

1306
00:57:27,040 --> 00:57:30,880
Speaker 2: Ale your brother committed like such a huge betrayal and

1307
00:57:31,200 --> 00:57:33,600
Speaker 2: didn't even really. Apologize she just kind of expected you

1308
00:57:33,680 --> 00:57:34,680
Speaker 2: to kind of move past.

1309
00:57:34,680 --> 00:57:37,840
Speaker 1: It he was, like she chose me, man, yes sorry sor.

1310
00:57:38,280 --> 00:57:41,640
Speaker 1: Bummer and three years later we got. Baby the fact

1311
00:57:41,680 --> 00:57:43,640
Speaker 1: that he was just like this is all. Good, Yeah

1312
00:57:43,680 --> 00:57:45,280
Speaker 1: but also did the parents?

1313
00:57:45,400 --> 00:57:47,680
Speaker 3: Know that's WHAT i want to, Know, like why did

1314
00:57:47,840 --> 00:57:51,320
Speaker 3: no one share These instagram? Stories? Why? What what is

1315
00:57:51,320 --> 00:57:53,560
Speaker 3: everyone else's vibe about? This what's going? On?

1316
00:57:53,720 --> 00:57:55,480
Speaker 1: YEAH i feel like it wasn't, like let's like they

1317
00:57:55,520 --> 00:57:56,360
Speaker 1: weren't even trying to hide.

1318
00:57:56,400 --> 00:57:59,000
Speaker 3: It, no really like, no they were just, like oh,

1319
00:57:59,080 --> 00:58:00,880
Speaker 3: yeah you just Didn't you were the last kist to.

1320
00:58:00,880 --> 00:58:03,120
Speaker 1: Bro but we shared about. It the brother literally is, like,

1321
00:58:03,200 --> 00:58:04,360
Speaker 1: yeah a car is with.

1322
00:58:04,320 --> 00:58:07,440
Speaker 3: Me, now, yeah like that you missed that?

1323
00:58:07,520 --> 00:58:09,400
Speaker 1: Memo did you not? Know did she not tell? You

1324
00:58:09,440 --> 00:58:12,160
Speaker 1: did you not get? Alert did you not tell? Him? Oh,

1325
00:58:12,240 --> 00:58:15,240
Speaker 1: yeah we're. Together oh you guys were. Together she doesn't love.

1326
00:58:15,280 --> 00:58:16,000
Speaker 1: You but there is an.

1327
00:58:16,040 --> 00:58:18,200
Speaker 3: Update cut them off though. Forever you don't have to

1328
00:58:18,200 --> 00:58:18,440
Speaker 3: talk to.

1329
00:58:18,480 --> 00:58:20,400
Speaker 1: Them. Yeah the fact that you were going to therapy

1330
00:58:20,440 --> 00:58:21,320
Speaker 1: and you know that.

1331
00:58:21,280 --> 00:58:23,120
Speaker 3: You're Not, yeah you were bettering.

1332
00:58:23,120 --> 00:58:24,800
Speaker 1: Yourself you already know you're not the a. Hole but

1333
00:58:24,840 --> 00:58:26,720
Speaker 1: the fact that your mom was like forgive and.

1334
00:58:26,760 --> 00:58:29,880
Speaker 2: Forget, yeah, no, no, no they're taking his. Side he hasn't.

1335
00:58:30,000 --> 00:58:31,360
Speaker 2: Apologized he never.

1336
00:58:31,400 --> 00:58:33,360
Speaker 1: Apologized now he's trying, to but it's like it's a

1337
00:58:33,400 --> 00:58:35,120
Speaker 1: little too late to. Apologize.

1338
00:58:35,120 --> 00:58:37,400
Speaker 2: Man first, off BEFORE i start with the, UPDATE i

1339
00:58:37,400 --> 00:58:39,040
Speaker 2: just want to thank the people who responded to my.

1340
00:58:39,080 --> 00:58:41,240
Speaker 2: Post though some of you were very intent with me

1341
00:58:41,320 --> 00:58:43,880
Speaker 2: getting back at my brother with violence and to cut them.

1342
00:58:43,920 --> 00:58:45,760
Speaker 2: OFF i know your hearts were in the right, place

1343
00:58:45,840 --> 00:58:47,720
Speaker 2: BUT i do want to clear some stuff. UP i

1344
00:58:47,840 --> 00:58:50,120
Speaker 2: wasn't trying to paint my parents as the bad guy

1345
00:58:50,200 --> 00:58:52,880
Speaker 2: in my last. Post they actually forgave him a couple

1346
00:58:52,880 --> 00:58:55,280
Speaker 2: of years before they even announced Carl it was. PREGNANT

1347
00:58:55,440 --> 00:58:57,840
Speaker 2: i also believe that nothing would have come from me

1348
00:58:57,920 --> 00:59:00,880
Speaker 2: beating my brother into a pulp besides probably going to

1349
00:59:00,960 --> 00:59:03,280
Speaker 2: jail and causing riffs in the. Family now with that

1350
00:59:03,360 --> 00:59:06,000
Speaker 2: out of the, way let's get into the. UPDATE i

1351
00:59:06,040 --> 00:59:07,960
Speaker 2: sat my mom and dad down with my brother in

1352
00:59:08,000 --> 00:59:10,880
Speaker 2: my parents' living room and finally told all of them

1353
00:59:10,920 --> 00:59:12,880
Speaker 2: HOW i. FELT i told him that what my brother

1354
00:59:12,960 --> 00:59:16,080
Speaker 2: did was. Unforgivable not the type of unforgivable that Means

1355
00:59:16,080 --> 00:59:17,680
Speaker 2: i'll hate him for the rest of my, life but

1356
00:59:17,720 --> 00:59:20,880
Speaker 2: the type of unforgivable that means THAT i literally want

1357
00:59:20,960 --> 00:59:23,000
Speaker 2: nothing to do with, him BECAUSE i don't want a

1358
00:59:23,000 --> 00:59:25,640
Speaker 2: relationship with someone who could sleep with a friend's girlfriend

1359
00:59:25,640 --> 00:59:28,320
Speaker 2: behind his, back much less his. Brother that's not the

1360
00:59:28,320 --> 00:59:30,680
Speaker 2: type of PERSON i want to be. Around my brother

1361
00:59:30,800 --> 00:59:33,080
Speaker 2: tried to make a rebuttal by saying that he'd changed

1362
00:59:33,120 --> 00:59:33,880
Speaker 2: and would never do it.

1363
00:59:33,920 --> 00:59:37,320
Speaker 3: Again, no, REALLY i hope he wouldn't do it again.

1364
00:59:37,200 --> 00:59:39,840
Speaker 1: Because you did it once and look what you have, well,

1365
00:59:39,920 --> 00:59:42,560
Speaker 1: yeah you have a, wife you'll have a. Baby you doubled.

1366
00:59:42,640 --> 00:59:45,960
Speaker 1: Down you didn't, like OH i rethought. This, yeah if

1367
00:59:46,240 --> 00:59:49,120
Speaker 1: if he rethought, him, like, oh that was that. Relationship but,

1368
00:59:49,240 --> 00:59:52,280
Speaker 1: no he kept. Going he went and had a family

1369
00:59:52,400 --> 00:59:55,400
Speaker 1: with the. Girl really messed.

1370
00:59:55,480 --> 00:59:57,680
Speaker 2: Up he said it like he didn't marry and have

1371
00:59:57,800 --> 00:59:59,560
Speaker 2: the child of the. GIRL i told HIM i wanted to.

1372
00:59:59,600 --> 01:00:02,200
Speaker 2: MARRY i then asked my parents how they were able

1373
01:00:02,240 --> 01:00:04,080
Speaker 2: to forgive, him and they said that they were really

1374
01:00:04,080 --> 01:00:06,360
Speaker 2: disappointed in him for a, while but when he got

1375
01:00:06,440 --> 01:00:10,040
Speaker 2: saved and started, preaching they forgave him since he's earned

1376
01:00:10,080 --> 01:00:12,520
Speaker 2: a new. LEAVE i then asked would they still forgive

1377
01:00:12,560 --> 01:00:14,400
Speaker 2: him if they were in the same position as, me

1378
01:00:14,960 --> 01:00:17,400
Speaker 2: and they said that they would have forgiven him, eventually

1379
01:00:17,480 --> 01:00:20,000
Speaker 2: WHICH i don't believe at. All, anyway we just went

1380
01:00:20,040 --> 01:00:22,080
Speaker 2: back and forth for a while until my brother said

1381
01:00:22,120 --> 01:00:24,160
Speaker 2: THAT i shouldn't be holding grudges.

1382
01:00:23,960 --> 01:00:27,360
Speaker 3: If it was flipped like, yeah, crazy that is not

1383
01:00:27,400 --> 01:00:27,760
Speaker 3: something that you.

1384
01:00:27,840 --> 01:00:30,000
Speaker 1: GET i don't. LIKE i don't like when the parents are,

1385
01:00:30,000 --> 01:00:31,880
Speaker 1: like we forgave him you you weren't in the.

1386
01:00:31,880 --> 01:00:34,960
Speaker 2: Position, yeah that wasn't, like you're not you don't know

1387
01:00:35,000 --> 01:00:37,560
Speaker 2: HOW i Was MOM i then told him that he

1388
01:00:37,560 --> 01:00:40,439
Speaker 2: shouldn't be sleeping with other people's. Girlfriends he then looked

1389
01:00:40,480 --> 01:00:43,000
Speaker 2: at the ground and started to. Cry my mom said

1390
01:00:43,000 --> 01:00:45,040
Speaker 2: that WHAT i said was too harsh since he had

1391
01:00:45,080 --> 01:00:47,640
Speaker 2: already repented for his. SINS i then gave them the

1392
01:00:47,720 --> 01:00:50,200
Speaker 2: ultimatum most of you told me to. Do that they

1393
01:00:50,200 --> 01:00:53,000
Speaker 2: could either accept the FACT i want nothing to do

1394
01:00:53,120 --> 01:00:55,400
Speaker 2: with him and move, on OR i would cut them,

1395
01:00:55,440 --> 01:00:57,880
Speaker 2: off along with him and his. Family my dad then

1396
01:00:57,960 --> 01:01:00,440
Speaker 2: said THAT i would regret IF i don't forgive my.

1397
01:01:00,480 --> 01:01:02,720
Speaker 2: BROTHER i then asked if that was their final, answer

1398
01:01:02,760 --> 01:01:05,040
Speaker 2: and my mom said. Fine she said they will come

1399
01:01:05,040 --> 01:01:07,160
Speaker 2: to terms with me not wanting to be in my brother's.

1400
01:01:07,200 --> 01:01:08,760
Speaker 2: LIFE i then asked my dad if that was how

1401
01:01:08,760 --> 01:01:12,720
Speaker 2: he felt, too and he said, yeah and you guys

1402
01:01:12,840 --> 01:01:15,040
Speaker 2: can be in our life forever by joining us live

1403
01:01:15,080 --> 01:01:16,800
Speaker 2: every week to have THREE pmpst.

1404
01:01:16,520 --> 01:01:19,040
Speaker 3: Just tap her, profile tap. IT i think that's totally.

1405
01:01:19,040 --> 01:01:21,000
Speaker 2: Fair and if your parents can't respect that you don't

1406
01:01:21,000 --> 01:01:22,520
Speaker 2: want a relationship with your, brother.

1407
01:01:22,600 --> 01:01:25,840
Speaker 1: Then it was a go. Ultimatum it's like you get

1408
01:01:27,040 --> 01:01:28,840
Speaker 1: to cut them. Off, yeah you get both. Sons you

1409
01:01:28,880 --> 01:01:31,920
Speaker 1: get one son because you're not respecting WHAT i have.

1410
01:01:31,960 --> 01:01:33,960
Speaker 3: On the emotions and What i've gone, Through.

1411
01:01:33,920 --> 01:01:36,919
Speaker 1: Like i've really Like i'm, healed but i Am i'm

1412
01:01:36,960 --> 01:01:39,600
Speaker 1: no longer dealing with that. Exactly you are not the

1413
01:01:39,600 --> 01:01:40,920
Speaker 1: a hole for cutting off your.

1414
01:01:41,000 --> 01:01:41,760
Speaker 3: Brother you're setting.

1415
01:01:41,760 --> 01:01:44,240
Speaker 2: Boundaries, yeah and it seems like your therapy is working

1416
01:01:44,240 --> 01:01:48,000
Speaker 2: because now you're able to set those boundaries and if.

1417
01:01:47,840 --> 01:01:50,160
Speaker 3: People disrespect, that they don't get to be in your.

1418
01:01:50,160 --> 01:01:51,760
Speaker 2: Life but there is a little bit more to the.

1419
01:01:51,840 --> 01:01:54,360
Speaker 2: STORY i then thank them for their, time looked at

1420
01:01:54,360 --> 01:01:56,120
Speaker 2: my brother and told him that no matter what he,

1421
01:01:56,160 --> 01:01:59,320
Speaker 2: does there is nothing that he could do to get

1422
01:01:59,320 --> 01:02:01,480
Speaker 2: me to spend Time i'm with, them AND i told

1423
01:02:01,520 --> 01:02:02,160
Speaker 2: him to have a good.

1424
01:02:02,200 --> 01:02:03,480
Speaker 1: Life oh damn wow.

1425
01:02:03,840 --> 01:02:06,720
Speaker 2: REAL i then walked out and drove to get some

1426
01:02:06,800 --> 01:02:09,000
Speaker 2: in and out and went to. Bed the whole conversation

1427
01:02:09,120 --> 01:02:12,320
Speaker 2: was really mentally and physically, draining SO i basically passed

1428
01:02:12,320 --> 01:02:15,400
Speaker 2: out a couple seconds after hitting my. Bed the next,

1429
01:02:15,520 --> 01:02:18,400
Speaker 2: day TODAY i decided to download some dating app to

1430
01:02:18,440 --> 01:02:19,200
Speaker 2: try dating in.

1431
01:02:19,400 --> 01:02:22,160
Speaker 3: To really move on from this whole. Situation and that

1432
01:02:22,960 --> 01:02:26,040
Speaker 3: is the end of that. Story, wow hope he really

1433
01:02:26,080 --> 01:02:26,400
Speaker 3: went through.

1434
01:02:26,400 --> 01:02:28,720
Speaker 1: That he, did and you know, what he's coming out

1435
01:02:28,760 --> 01:02:31,840
Speaker 1: of it better you, Did he cut out something that

1436
01:02:31,960 --> 01:02:35,680
Speaker 1: was extremely traumatic and. Toxic, yeah it's your brother and

1437
01:02:35,960 --> 01:02:39,760
Speaker 1: he did something so severely just messed up that he

1438
01:02:39,800 --> 01:02:41,640
Speaker 1: doesn't need forgiveness.

1439
01:02:41,200 --> 01:02:44,960
Speaker 3: Exactly when you have a rotten, sibling just.

1440
01:02:45,080 --> 01:02:47,520
Speaker 1: Amputate and the fact that, you're like he, said have

1441
01:02:47,560 --> 01:02:49,840
Speaker 1: a good, life like he wasn't like on bad.

1442
01:02:49,720 --> 01:02:51,640
Speaker 2: Terms or anything LIKE i hate, YOU i hope. YOU

1443
01:02:52,200 --> 01:02:54,240
Speaker 2: i just don't want, ever just LIKE i just don't want.

1444
01:02:54,160 --> 01:02:56,160
Speaker 1: You don't want to do anything with. You the fact

1445
01:02:56,200 --> 01:02:58,720
Speaker 1: that you wish, somebody, hey you do your, thing congrass

1446
01:02:58,760 --> 01:03:00,520
Speaker 1: in the. Family that's. IT i don't want to be

1447
01:03:00,520 --> 01:03:02,760
Speaker 1: involved with. It that's like the best thing you could. Do.

1448
01:03:02,920 --> 01:03:04,560
Speaker 1: Exactly you have no reason.

1449
01:03:04,320 --> 01:03:07,200
Speaker 2: To don't hold that like anger in your, heart but

1450
01:03:07,240 --> 01:03:08,840
Speaker 2: you don't have to keep it close to, you like

1451
01:03:08,880 --> 01:03:09,720
Speaker 2: you don't have to keep him.

1452
01:03:09,880 --> 01:03:12,400
Speaker 1: And your family should respect your, wishes and they.

1453
01:03:12,480 --> 01:03:16,040
Speaker 2: Did but that is the end of that. Story so

1454
01:03:16,200 --> 01:03:17,600
Speaker 2: we'll see you Next ti