1 00:00:02,200 --> 00:00:03,600 Speaker 1: Welcome to Desperately Devoted. 2 00:00:03,800 --> 00:00:06,400 Speaker 2: Think of us as your favorite neighbors as we chat 3 00:00:06,440 --> 00:00:08,520 Speaker 2: about life and relationships, all. 4 00:00:08,440 --> 00:00:11,719 Speaker 3: While we revisit the iconic show Desperate Housewives together. 5 00:00:11,880 --> 00:00:15,600 Speaker 2: I'm Terry Hatcher, I'm Andrea Bowen, and I'm Emerson Tiny Well. 6 00:00:15,640 --> 00:00:19,560 Speaker 2: Welcome back, everybody, Welcome to the podcast. This is desperately Devoted, 7 00:00:19,600 --> 00:00:22,279 Speaker 2: and we are desperately devoted to you and all things 8 00:00:22,320 --> 00:00:28,120 Speaker 2: Desperate Housewives and all things life. This is for episode eighteen, 9 00:00:28,760 --> 00:00:31,960 Speaker 2: which is called Children Will Listen. 10 00:00:32,600 --> 00:00:37,080 Speaker 3: Which is from my favorite son, Tim Music Hall Into 11 00:00:37,080 --> 00:00:43,680 Speaker 3: the Woods. It is this beautiful haunting song that's sung 12 00:00:43,720 --> 00:00:48,159 Speaker 3: by Bernette Peters the Witch and is really honestly a 13 00:00:48,200 --> 00:00:50,879 Speaker 3: warning of the care and then it comes back in 14 00:00:50,920 --> 00:00:53,080 Speaker 3: the reprise later when they say, you know, be careful 15 00:00:53,120 --> 00:00:54,760 Speaker 3: what you wish for wishes our children. 16 00:00:55,000 --> 00:00:57,160 Speaker 4: But this idea that the things that you. 17 00:00:58,000 --> 00:01:03,960 Speaker 3: Say will actually have consequence and will be heard, and 18 00:01:04,200 --> 00:01:06,120 Speaker 3: the kind of like listen to me refrain that the 19 00:01:06,160 --> 00:01:09,600 Speaker 3: Witch has had for Rapunzel, who she's keeping up in 20 00:01:09,640 --> 00:01:14,320 Speaker 3: her tower, finally comes back to haunt her and it's 21 00:01:14,840 --> 00:01:16,080 Speaker 3: oh God, I have the goosebumps. 22 00:01:16,120 --> 00:01:18,959 Speaker 4: Have goosebumps? Okay, Well, love something that's one of. 23 00:01:18,880 --> 00:01:22,520 Speaker 1: Those that's one of those like instant cry things in 24 00:01:22,520 --> 00:01:24,280 Speaker 1: my life, Like if I listen to that song, it's 25 00:01:24,280 --> 00:01:24,880 Speaker 1: an instant. 26 00:01:24,720 --> 00:01:25,880 Speaker 4: Criscriber sort of. 27 00:01:25,920 --> 00:01:28,320 Speaker 2: You know, there's a little bit of an acting technique. 28 00:01:28,360 --> 00:01:33,040 Speaker 2: I do feel that many actors I know use music 29 00:01:33,360 --> 00:01:36,840 Speaker 2: in a way that is supportive to their emotional state 30 00:01:36,920 --> 00:01:42,280 Speaker 2: of a character in something that they're working on. Sometimes actors, 31 00:01:42,319 --> 00:01:45,560 Speaker 2: including by myself, you know, you be in your trailer 32 00:01:45,680 --> 00:01:48,520 Speaker 2: before you shoot a scene, or even on set. I've 33 00:01:48,520 --> 00:01:52,520 Speaker 2: seen people with you know, headphones in and they'll be 34 00:01:52,680 --> 00:01:56,240 Speaker 2: listening to a certain piece of music that evokes some 35 00:01:56,280 --> 00:01:58,880 Speaker 2: sort of mood that they feel that they need to 36 00:01:58,880 --> 00:02:01,520 Speaker 2: have as a character. Like music is a very powerful thing. 37 00:02:01,920 --> 00:02:04,480 Speaker 2: And I'm I know, we're not going to go because 38 00:02:04,520 --> 00:02:07,320 Speaker 2: we've already told our audience the Into the Woods story 39 00:02:07,360 --> 00:02:11,680 Speaker 2: of doing into the Woods for your eleventh birthday party 40 00:02:11,720 --> 00:02:15,520 Speaker 2: in the backyard. We're very committed to all things Into 41 00:02:15,520 --> 00:02:18,160 Speaker 2: the Woods. But if you're not familiar with that show, 42 00:02:19,080 --> 00:02:23,560 Speaker 2: you should you should check it out. There's many iterations 43 00:02:23,560 --> 00:02:24,800 Speaker 2: of it summing. 44 00:02:24,480 --> 00:02:26,760 Speaker 1: But I think you should start. I think you should 45 00:02:26,760 --> 00:02:29,400 Speaker 1: start with the with the original and I think that uh, 46 00:02:29,639 --> 00:02:31,320 Speaker 1: you know. That's how I experienced it. We watched it 47 00:02:31,320 --> 00:02:33,760 Speaker 1: on VHS because we'd recorded it on PBS when they 48 00:02:33,760 --> 00:02:36,280 Speaker 1: aired it, and I think it's the best way to 49 00:02:36,680 --> 00:02:38,200 Speaker 1: introduce yourself to that musical. 50 00:02:38,400 --> 00:02:39,400 Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, there is. 51 00:02:39,440 --> 00:02:41,760 Speaker 3: There is a movie of it that Meryl Streep is 52 00:02:41,800 --> 00:02:43,200 Speaker 3: in that only blunts in. 53 00:02:43,240 --> 00:02:44,360 Speaker 4: That's that's amazing. 54 00:02:44,600 --> 00:02:48,359 Speaker 3: But they've cut songs and it's not exactly the same storyline, 55 00:02:48,440 --> 00:02:50,560 Speaker 3: and so I would say that shouldn't be your first 56 00:02:50,720 --> 00:02:51,359 Speaker 3: foray and. 57 00:02:51,400 --> 00:02:54,040 Speaker 1: I still have not seen it because of my loyalty 58 00:02:54,080 --> 00:02:56,240 Speaker 1: to the original Broadway show. 59 00:02:56,240 --> 00:02:58,639 Speaker 3: Certain things you'll love, and there will be a few 60 00:02:58,639 --> 00:03:00,080 Speaker 3: things that you're disappointed with, I think. 61 00:03:00,560 --> 00:03:03,520 Speaker 2: Yeah, but it's worth saying, but I respect your loyalty. 62 00:03:03,680 --> 00:03:09,320 Speaker 2: So this episode, a lot happens as always. We have 63 00:03:09,400 --> 00:03:13,600 Speaker 2: Carlos and Gabby who are arguing over money and quite violently. 64 00:03:13,720 --> 00:03:15,959 Speaker 2: We're going to get into that. I think we can 65 00:03:16,040 --> 00:03:20,480 Speaker 2: say that all three of us were equally upset. Yeah, 66 00:03:20,520 --> 00:03:23,680 Speaker 2: so we'll talk more about that. We have Paul and 67 00:03:23,840 --> 00:03:29,120 Speaker 2: Zach and Felicia who are continuing to intermingle over their 68 00:03:29,720 --> 00:03:34,000 Speaker 2: garden fence and sort of stir up the mystery of 69 00:03:34,120 --> 00:03:37,400 Speaker 2: Mary Alice and was she ever in Utah and did 70 00:03:37,440 --> 00:03:39,920 Speaker 2: she know Felicia and what is all that leading? 71 00:03:40,320 --> 00:03:44,360 Speaker 3: Also, what's that dismembered body in the toy chest finally 72 00:03:44,400 --> 00:03:46,040 Speaker 3: going to be that comes back around? 73 00:03:46,280 --> 00:03:46,600 Speaker 4: Yes? 74 00:03:46,680 --> 00:03:50,360 Speaker 2: And then we have Brie and Rex who go to 75 00:03:50,480 --> 00:03:53,480 Speaker 2: visit Andrew who's now been at the detention camp for 76 00:03:53,560 --> 00:03:57,040 Speaker 2: a while. And Andrew discloses that he is gay, and 77 00:03:57,160 --> 00:03:59,520 Speaker 2: Brie ends up saying, I will wait in the car. 78 00:04:00,840 --> 00:04:04,000 Speaker 2: That's one way of dealing with something. And then we 79 00:04:04,080 --> 00:04:06,600 Speaker 2: have Lynette who is dealing with her Brady kids and 80 00:04:06,640 --> 00:04:10,320 Speaker 2: I know we've talked about before like where's that leading, 81 00:04:10,520 --> 00:04:13,240 Speaker 2: like her sort of lack of ability to get any 82 00:04:13,320 --> 00:04:16,440 Speaker 2: kind of appropriate control over that, But in this episode, 83 00:04:16,880 --> 00:04:20,200 Speaker 2: she ends up needing Brie to do a last minute 84 00:04:20,200 --> 00:04:23,480 Speaker 2: babysitting for her, and the kids are really acting up 85 00:04:23,560 --> 00:04:28,599 Speaker 2: over and over, and Bree's conservative Reagan on the Wall 86 00:04:29,600 --> 00:04:33,640 Speaker 2: of way of looking at life is that she is 87 00:04:33,680 --> 00:04:38,159 Speaker 2: a spanker, and so she spanks one of Bree's boys 88 00:04:38,279 --> 00:04:43,560 Speaker 2: and that ends up with Lynette and Brie really betting 89 00:04:43,560 --> 00:04:45,040 Speaker 2: heads over motherhood. 90 00:04:45,160 --> 00:04:50,360 Speaker 3: We cannot overlook the Motherhood's storyline between Susan and our 91 00:04:50,480 --> 00:04:56,360 Speaker 3: guest star of this episode. 92 00:04:53,240 --> 00:04:54,440 Speaker 5: La Warren. 93 00:04:54,720 --> 00:04:58,800 Speaker 2: Yes, so Leslie and Warren appears in this episode as 94 00:04:58,839 --> 00:05:02,599 Speaker 2: Susan's mother, so f and so yeah, as I was saying, 95 00:05:02,640 --> 00:05:08,240 Speaker 2: like so much of this episode hinges around motherhood and 96 00:05:08,800 --> 00:05:11,159 Speaker 2: being a mom and being a good mom and what 97 00:05:11,360 --> 00:05:13,559 Speaker 2: is a good mom? And are you a good enough mom? 98 00:05:13,720 --> 00:05:17,440 Speaker 2: And you even have Brie at the detention center, you know, 99 00:05:17,560 --> 00:05:20,360 Speaker 2: she's just feeling so frustrated. 100 00:05:19,800 --> 00:05:21,720 Speaker 5: And bad and she looks at Rex and she's like. 101 00:05:21,839 --> 00:05:25,920 Speaker 2: I am a good mother, and so I don't know, 102 00:05:26,040 --> 00:05:27,040 Speaker 2: like what, why is ill? 103 00:05:27,720 --> 00:05:29,240 Speaker 5: Also, yeah, jury is out. 104 00:05:29,320 --> 00:05:31,839 Speaker 1: We get a line from Lynette sort of similarly on 105 00:05:31,880 --> 00:05:34,120 Speaker 1: the other side of things, which is when she's discussing 106 00:05:34,160 --> 00:05:37,960 Speaker 1: how her mother parented her and her sisters growing up 107 00:05:38,000 --> 00:05:39,760 Speaker 1: and that she would hit them, and she says, I 108 00:05:39,800 --> 00:05:42,200 Speaker 1: will not be mine, I will not become my mother, 109 00:05:42,320 --> 00:05:45,279 Speaker 1: which I think is a really prevalent thing. A lot 110 00:05:45,320 --> 00:05:47,560 Speaker 1: of a lot of people feel like I don't want 111 00:05:47,600 --> 00:05:48,599 Speaker 1: to become my parents. 112 00:05:48,720 --> 00:05:50,240 Speaker 5: Oh I feel that way all the time. 113 00:05:50,279 --> 00:05:53,960 Speaker 2: I mean sometimes, like as even as I'm aging, you know, 114 00:05:54,040 --> 00:05:57,480 Speaker 2: I'll look in the mirror and sometimes see my mother 115 00:05:58,360 --> 00:06:03,000 Speaker 2: and it's so disturbing, not disturbing necessarily from just the 116 00:06:03,080 --> 00:06:08,279 Speaker 2: looks thing. But the looks thing leads me into feeling 117 00:06:08,440 --> 00:06:15,000 Speaker 2: emotionally like am I my mother because I personally while 118 00:06:15,040 --> 00:06:19,160 Speaker 2: I can totally respect that there are good qualities about 119 00:06:19,160 --> 00:06:23,560 Speaker 2: my mom, and I can also empathize with my mom's 120 00:06:23,720 --> 00:06:27,600 Speaker 2: weaknesses and where they came from from her very complicated 121 00:06:27,760 --> 00:06:31,760 Speaker 2: childhood and upbringing. So there's a lot of compassion there. 122 00:06:31,800 --> 00:06:36,040 Speaker 2: But in the end, I do not have a relationship 123 00:06:36,040 --> 00:06:41,800 Speaker 2: with a mother that is, I don't know, aspirational or 124 00:06:42,200 --> 00:06:46,400 Speaker 2: comforting or nurturing, even though I'm sure that she would 125 00:06:46,560 --> 00:06:50,360 Speaker 2: want to be, but she just not in my lifetime 126 00:06:50,440 --> 00:06:55,359 Speaker 2: really ever had those tools. And so I find my 127 00:06:55,600 --> 00:06:59,359 Speaker 2: mother daughter relationship as a daughter to my mother to 128 00:06:59,400 --> 00:07:03,760 Speaker 2: be complicated, which makes me treasure even more. My relationship 129 00:07:03,800 --> 00:07:07,120 Speaker 2: with you as the mother to the daughter, where I 130 00:07:07,160 --> 00:07:09,159 Speaker 2: think it's sort of the opposite of what I had 131 00:07:09,160 --> 00:07:09,920 Speaker 2: with my makes. 132 00:07:09,760 --> 00:07:10,320 Speaker 4: A lot of sense. 133 00:07:10,360 --> 00:07:12,160 Speaker 3: I mean, I was just gonna say, sometimes I look 134 00:07:12,200 --> 00:07:14,160 Speaker 3: in the mirror and I think that I look like 135 00:07:14,240 --> 00:07:16,600 Speaker 3: you when you were my age, and that's actually a big, 136 00:07:16,760 --> 00:07:20,160 Speaker 3: huge gift, and I get excited about it because you're gorgeous, 137 00:07:20,280 --> 00:07:23,520 Speaker 3: so very different feeling than looking in the mirror and 138 00:07:23,560 --> 00:07:24,240 Speaker 3: being horrified. 139 00:07:24,600 --> 00:07:25,560 Speaker 5: Isn't that crazy? 140 00:07:25,600 --> 00:07:25,880 Speaker 3: Though? 141 00:07:25,960 --> 00:07:28,920 Speaker 2: I mean, but that and that again, like to the generations. 142 00:07:29,280 --> 00:07:32,280 Speaker 2: I love part of our show being about these different 143 00:07:32,360 --> 00:07:37,000 Speaker 2: perspectives that generations have. And I love being a mom 144 00:07:37,080 --> 00:07:39,960 Speaker 2: who was able to break some of the negative cycle 145 00:07:40,200 --> 00:07:43,960 Speaker 2: in parenting that I experienced in the way that I 146 00:07:44,080 --> 00:07:44,800 Speaker 2: parented you. 147 00:07:45,080 --> 00:07:46,520 Speaker 5: I mean, I think it's one of the things. 148 00:07:46,600 --> 00:07:48,520 Speaker 3: Well, I think that's all that we can hope for, 149 00:07:48,760 --> 00:07:52,600 Speaker 3: is that we're able to break patterns that we saw 150 00:07:52,800 --> 00:07:55,520 Speaker 3: not serve the people that we love in our own lifetime. 151 00:07:55,920 --> 00:07:59,160 Speaker 1: Yeah, And I think that's the goal with parenting, right, 152 00:07:59,400 --> 00:08:04,640 Speaker 1: is like you, you take the paton and you you 153 00:08:04,760 --> 00:08:09,840 Speaker 1: try to incorporate the things that you appreciated from the 154 00:08:09,960 --> 00:08:14,200 Speaker 1: parents that you have, and you try to reject the 155 00:08:14,240 --> 00:08:17,680 Speaker 1: things that you feel like didn't serve you. I have 156 00:08:17,760 --> 00:08:20,280 Speaker 1: to say I have been blessed in my life. I 157 00:08:20,280 --> 00:08:25,080 Speaker 1: have an incredibly close relationship with my mom. My mom 158 00:08:25,200 --> 00:08:28,200 Speaker 1: is like a universal mom to so many people in 159 00:08:28,240 --> 00:08:33,240 Speaker 1: my life because of what an incredible example of maternal 160 00:08:33,440 --> 00:08:35,880 Speaker 1: love and support and guidance she provides. 161 00:08:36,480 --> 00:08:37,840 Speaker 4: I just I've always had. 162 00:08:37,720 --> 00:08:40,720 Speaker 1: A closeness with my mom, but I didn't I couldn't 163 00:08:40,760 --> 00:08:43,000 Speaker 1: relate in that way. I wasn't a mom, you know, 164 00:08:43,040 --> 00:08:45,200 Speaker 1: and I'm still just in the very very early stages 165 00:08:45,240 --> 00:08:48,000 Speaker 1: of my own motherhood journey. But gosh, you just end 166 00:08:48,080 --> 00:08:52,280 Speaker 1: up having so much more empathy for the fact that 167 00:08:52,320 --> 00:08:55,320 Speaker 1: she was just a young woman trying to figure it 168 00:08:55,360 --> 00:08:57,840 Speaker 1: out herself, you know, and oh my gosh, I'm just 169 00:08:57,920 --> 00:09:02,040 Speaker 1: completely overwhelmed with the idea of motherhood. So I really, 170 00:09:02,400 --> 00:09:07,439 Speaker 1: I actually really loved episode eighteen because of its emphasis 171 00:09:07,480 --> 00:09:08,079 Speaker 1: on thee. 172 00:09:07,800 --> 00:09:09,760 Speaker 5: Well, it's a miracle. 173 00:09:09,960 --> 00:09:12,720 Speaker 2: It's a miracle to grow a human being in your body, 174 00:09:12,800 --> 00:09:16,479 Speaker 2: that's for sure. And it's a great amount of responsibility 175 00:09:16,600 --> 00:09:22,920 Speaker 2: to think that you are responsible for this person's life 176 00:09:23,000 --> 00:09:26,280 Speaker 2: and everything they're going to feel and think and be 177 00:09:26,400 --> 00:09:33,480 Speaker 2: exposed to. And you know, it's crazy huge, which actually 178 00:09:33,600 --> 00:09:36,480 Speaker 2: leads me to why some people don't want to do it. 179 00:09:36,559 --> 00:09:39,800 Speaker 2: And in this instance, that would be Gabby. She do 180 00:09:40,080 --> 00:09:43,400 Speaker 2: not want to do it because it's too much. And 181 00:09:43,440 --> 00:09:47,360 Speaker 2: I actually have a lot of respect for people that 182 00:09:47,480 --> 00:09:50,560 Speaker 2: make that choice, because I don't think you should take 183 00:09:50,600 --> 00:09:53,560 Speaker 2: motherhood lightly, you know, I. 184 00:09:53,440 --> 00:09:54,880 Speaker 4: Know we've talked about this before. 185 00:09:55,000 --> 00:09:59,320 Speaker 3: I feel like you need absolutely zero credentials to become 186 00:09:59,400 --> 00:10:03,840 Speaker 3: a parent, and I think you should have to prove 187 00:10:04,080 --> 00:10:07,800 Speaker 3: that it's something you're ready to I mean, unfortunately, biologically 188 00:10:07,800 --> 00:10:10,840 Speaker 3: this doesn't happen except for if my mom was having 189 00:10:10,840 --> 00:10:15,360 Speaker 3: her dictatorship where everyone had a forced eseectomy. 190 00:10:14,320 --> 00:10:17,880 Speaker 2: I'm committed to that plan. 191 00:10:18,000 --> 00:10:21,840 Speaker 5: I think it's a plan, but I. 192 00:10:21,800 --> 00:10:25,000 Speaker 3: Do I mean, obviously, biologically there aren't any credentials. But 193 00:10:25,080 --> 00:10:27,720 Speaker 3: I wish that there was some sort of process the 194 00:10:27,760 --> 00:10:30,280 Speaker 3: way that if you adopt a child, you have to 195 00:10:30,320 --> 00:10:35,240 Speaker 3: do so much work to prove that you have a 196 00:10:35,280 --> 00:10:37,880 Speaker 3: stable home and a stable income, and that you're going 197 00:10:37,960 --> 00:10:39,520 Speaker 3: to be the type of parent who's going to be 198 00:10:39,559 --> 00:10:39,840 Speaker 3: able to. 199 00:10:39,840 --> 00:10:41,920 Speaker 4: Show up for your kid in lots of different ways, 200 00:10:41,960 --> 00:10:42,520 Speaker 4: like and. 201 00:10:42,440 --> 00:10:43,959 Speaker 3: You have to show that you live in a certain 202 00:10:44,000 --> 00:10:48,120 Speaker 3: It's just it's very difficult, the tasks, the different tasks 203 00:10:48,160 --> 00:10:50,920 Speaker 3: to adopt a child, as it should be, but I 204 00:10:50,960 --> 00:10:56,800 Speaker 3: think there should some level of similar qualification to have 205 00:10:56,840 --> 00:10:59,199 Speaker 3: a child. And if you don't want to have a child, 206 00:10:59,240 --> 00:11:01,679 Speaker 3: if you're able to go, you know what, it's a 207 00:11:01,760 --> 00:11:04,439 Speaker 3: huge responsibility. The world is a crazy place. I think 208 00:11:04,480 --> 00:11:07,360 Speaker 3: there's a myriad of reasons it would make sense not 209 00:11:07,600 --> 00:11:10,680 Speaker 3: to want to personally take on the responsibility of bringing 210 00:11:10,720 --> 00:11:13,199 Speaker 3: another life into the world that you're going to shape 211 00:11:13,240 --> 00:11:17,680 Speaker 3: and mold. Getting back to Gabyan Carlos, I really think 212 00:11:17,760 --> 00:11:20,080 Speaker 3: you need to be with someone who is on the 213 00:11:20,120 --> 00:11:21,040 Speaker 3: same page about that. 214 00:11:21,559 --> 00:11:25,480 Speaker 1: I think that scene is so crazy frustrating as well, 215 00:11:25,520 --> 00:11:28,200 Speaker 1: because she couldn't be more clear, right. He says, I 216 00:11:28,200 --> 00:11:30,720 Speaker 1: always thought maybe you'd leave the door open, and she's like, well, 217 00:11:30,760 --> 00:11:33,880 Speaker 1: I'm not. You know, it's not And she's expressing a 218 00:11:34,000 --> 00:11:37,839 Speaker 1: gratitude to him for the fact that she interprets him 219 00:11:38,240 --> 00:11:40,960 Speaker 1: as as understanding and respecting the fact that this is 220 00:11:41,000 --> 00:11:42,840 Speaker 1: not part of her plan. She's been clear about it. 221 00:11:42,880 --> 00:11:47,160 Speaker 1: She doesn't want kids, and he says, you know, like, yeah, 222 00:11:47,200 --> 00:11:49,360 Speaker 1: I do accept it because I think you're the best 223 00:11:49,360 --> 00:11:51,080 Speaker 1: thing in the world, blah blah blah. But meanwhile we 224 00:11:51,120 --> 00:11:54,319 Speaker 1: see that he's completely been continued with her. 225 00:11:55,920 --> 00:11:56,360 Speaker 5: Yeah. 226 00:11:56,480 --> 00:12:01,880 Speaker 3: I think, actually, what the fuck Carlos. This episode could 227 00:12:02,000 --> 00:12:04,960 Speaker 3: a new title, which it shouldn't be because obviously, you know, 228 00:12:05,040 --> 00:12:08,480 Speaker 3: we Love some Time would be what the fuck Carlos. 229 00:12:08,240 --> 00:12:09,480 Speaker 4: Because that. 230 00:12:11,720 --> 00:12:15,680 Speaker 3: I was yelling at my laptop where I was watching 231 00:12:15,720 --> 00:12:19,920 Speaker 3: this episode from Yeah, I just know he's. 232 00:12:19,840 --> 00:12:24,240 Speaker 1: Clearly the villain of Withasteria Lane and I didn't remember 233 00:12:24,400 --> 00:12:27,000 Speaker 1: this this way. You know, like I really think when 234 00:12:27,040 --> 00:12:29,320 Speaker 1: I thought back on season one, that we were led 235 00:12:29,360 --> 00:12:33,360 Speaker 1: to think that that Paul Young is the spooky guy 236 00:12:33,600 --> 00:12:35,840 Speaker 1: on the street and you know a little bit with Mike. 237 00:12:35,880 --> 00:12:38,360 Speaker 1: But I think we ultimately obviously are rooting for Mike. 238 00:12:38,640 --> 00:12:41,680 Speaker 1: But you know, Carlos wasn't in my mind the like 239 00:12:41,960 --> 00:12:44,880 Speaker 1: bad guy neighbor. But then we see this and I 240 00:12:44,880 --> 00:12:49,520 Speaker 1: mean this episode, he has that violent outburst moment where 241 00:12:49,520 --> 00:12:54,160 Speaker 1: he forces Gabrielle to sign this ye posting up you know, 242 00:12:54,200 --> 00:12:55,120 Speaker 1: marital agreement and. 243 00:12:55,240 --> 00:12:57,800 Speaker 2: So what So what happens in this episode is like 244 00:12:57,880 --> 00:13:01,400 Speaker 2: following through from the last episode, Gabby has sort of, 245 00:13:02,720 --> 00:13:07,000 Speaker 2: you know, subversely gotten a big paycheck from the hospital 246 00:13:07,120 --> 00:13:10,960 Speaker 2: who felt responsible for the death of Juanita because she 247 00:13:10,960 --> 00:13:15,800 Speaker 2: fell down the stairs. And she's keeping that a secret, 248 00:13:15,840 --> 00:13:18,760 Speaker 2: and you know, she seems to have a good plan 249 00:13:18,840 --> 00:13:21,920 Speaker 2: about it that you know, she doesn't want the government 250 00:13:21,960 --> 00:13:24,000 Speaker 2: to get the money and there's a whole you know, 251 00:13:24,080 --> 00:13:24,480 Speaker 2: with them. 252 00:13:24,360 --> 00:13:27,199 Speaker 3: And she's right that Carlos would have used the money 253 00:13:27,240 --> 00:13:29,440 Speaker 3: to pay the lawyers and not just taken the eight 254 00:13:29,480 --> 00:13:31,280 Speaker 3: month plea in jail. 255 00:13:31,440 --> 00:13:34,120 Speaker 2: Had she told him, you know, we can believe that 256 00:13:34,200 --> 00:13:36,120 Speaker 2: she was trying to do the best with the money 257 00:13:36,120 --> 00:13:38,280 Speaker 2: for the both of them, although you know, maybe she 258 00:13:38,440 --> 00:13:41,920 Speaker 2: was trying to keep it for herself. But needless to say, 259 00:13:42,200 --> 00:13:45,120 Speaker 2: what she was doing was the best plan for them 260 00:13:45,200 --> 00:13:47,160 Speaker 2: to keep the money. But she keeps it from him 261 00:13:47,200 --> 00:13:49,800 Speaker 2: and he finds out about it, and it is that 262 00:13:50,000 --> 00:13:57,920 Speaker 2: outburst of physical violence, like screaming so loud, grabbing her wrists. 263 00:13:57,760 --> 00:14:02,520 Speaker 3: He literally forces her hand to sign the post nup. 264 00:14:02,600 --> 00:14:05,360 Speaker 1: While he has his other hand like up on her neck. 265 00:14:05,240 --> 00:14:06,160 Speaker 4: On helping her. 266 00:14:06,360 --> 00:14:10,400 Speaker 2: Yeah, and I agree with you, Andrew. I did not 267 00:14:11,160 --> 00:14:15,240 Speaker 2: remember this part of that character. And it is also 268 00:14:15,400 --> 00:14:19,920 Speaker 2: as we're moving forward, hard to remember how he comes 269 00:14:20,000 --> 00:14:22,600 Speaker 2: back from this, because it is like things that you 270 00:14:22,640 --> 00:14:25,200 Speaker 2: see like that that you go, well, that character has 271 00:14:25,240 --> 00:14:28,120 Speaker 2: to die now, you know, right, because I don't know 272 00:14:28,160 --> 00:14:31,320 Speaker 2: how you recover from that. And he still, by the way, 273 00:14:31,480 --> 00:14:35,440 Speaker 2: has eight months of prison to be serving. I mean, 274 00:14:35,520 --> 00:14:37,760 Speaker 2: maybe that's what they're going to do. Maybe that's what 275 00:14:37,800 --> 00:14:40,800 Speaker 2: we're looking forward to, is that he's going to go 276 00:14:40,880 --> 00:14:44,560 Speaker 2: to prison and maybe come out a realized person or something. 277 00:14:44,640 --> 00:14:49,760 Speaker 2: But this, of course pushes Gabby back into John's arms, 278 00:14:49,960 --> 00:14:53,760 Speaker 2: and you know that's where she's you know, and I 279 00:14:53,800 --> 00:14:57,280 Speaker 2: guess it did give you a little bit of understanding 280 00:14:57,320 --> 00:14:59,800 Speaker 2: of what Gabby was doing with John in the first place. 281 00:14:59,840 --> 00:15:04,120 Speaker 2: Like I was always a little mystified by the whole 282 00:15:04,160 --> 00:15:07,400 Speaker 2: thing of like why does Gabby find this young person 283 00:15:07,840 --> 00:15:13,840 Speaker 2: so you know, intoxicating and I'm not sure any it 284 00:15:13,880 --> 00:15:16,360 Speaker 2: all made sense to me. But in that in this 285 00:15:16,440 --> 00:15:20,480 Speaker 2: scene and her rushing back into his arms really added 286 00:15:20,560 --> 00:15:31,920 Speaker 2: up for me. Let me circle back to the fabulous 287 00:15:31,960 --> 00:15:34,160 Speaker 2: and amazing, legendary Leslie and Warren. 288 00:15:34,560 --> 00:15:36,400 Speaker 4: Yes, let's do it, let's do it. 289 00:15:36,680 --> 00:15:41,440 Speaker 2: So she comes on as Susan's mom. And first of all, 290 00:15:42,000 --> 00:15:44,280 Speaker 2: did you guys ever see the movie Victor Victoria? 291 00:15:44,920 --> 00:15:45,479 Speaker 4: Yes? 292 00:15:45,760 --> 00:15:50,000 Speaker 2: Okay, So, like you know, that was my experience of 293 00:15:50,080 --> 00:15:57,360 Speaker 2: Leslie and Warren. This like coooky, fabulously flighty, sexy. 294 00:15:58,400 --> 00:16:02,080 Speaker 5: Actress, all the things that Susan is, all the things. 295 00:16:02,160 --> 00:16:05,800 Speaker 2: And even Mike Delfino says, you know, he has a 296 00:16:05,840 --> 00:16:08,760 Speaker 2: line where he says like, oh, now it's all makes 297 00:16:08,800 --> 00:16:12,600 Speaker 2: sense to me, you know, And that's pretty fabulous casting 298 00:16:12,840 --> 00:16:15,920 Speaker 2: when you can put that together. 299 00:16:16,120 --> 00:16:18,920 Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, I remember everyone freaking out about that casting, 300 00:16:19,000 --> 00:16:22,560 Speaker 1: like everyone internally on set, the writer's, the crew, like 301 00:16:22,640 --> 00:16:24,480 Speaker 1: everyone was just like, oh my god, this is the 302 00:16:24,520 --> 00:16:27,640 Speaker 1: perfect casting for Susan's mom. I do for that. 303 00:16:27,840 --> 00:16:29,720 Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, it really was. It really was. 304 00:16:29,800 --> 00:16:32,240 Speaker 2: There was, and it was funny because there was some 305 00:16:32,440 --> 00:16:35,800 Speaker 2: lines within that. One of those first scenes where they're 306 00:16:35,840 --> 00:16:40,800 Speaker 2: cooking in the kitchen together, where Sophie claims that people 307 00:16:40,920 --> 00:16:44,040 Speaker 2: think her and Susan look like sisters. 308 00:16:44,200 --> 00:16:47,680 Speaker 3: This was my favorite line of the episode and I 309 00:16:47,760 --> 00:16:51,240 Speaker 3: actually did a spit take when I heard it, when 310 00:16:52,000 --> 00:16:55,160 Speaker 3: Sophie says, people think we're sisters and Susan goes because 311 00:16:55,200 --> 00:16:59,320 Speaker 3: you tell them that, and it was so perfectly delivered. 312 00:17:00,280 --> 00:17:02,640 Speaker 4: Susan is chopping this onion, which I had to point out. 313 00:17:02,640 --> 00:17:05,040 Speaker 3: I was like, Wow, my mom is going to like 314 00:17:05,160 --> 00:17:08,000 Speaker 3: be cringing so hard right now, because this is not 315 00:17:08,160 --> 00:17:11,440 Speaker 3: how you hold an onion that you chop, and it's 316 00:17:11,600 --> 00:17:13,600 Speaker 3: she's chopping it like it's a circular. 317 00:17:13,680 --> 00:17:16,080 Speaker 5: It's just they featured it. 318 00:17:16,160 --> 00:17:18,080 Speaker 1: I thought that it was going to lead to her 319 00:17:18,080 --> 00:17:20,359 Speaker 1: cutting her finger or something, because they like zoomed in 320 00:17:20,440 --> 00:17:22,200 Speaker 1: on it, and I thought, Oh, she's gonna cut her finger, 321 00:17:22,240 --> 00:17:23,600 Speaker 1: and then nothing came of it, and I thought, well, 322 00:17:23,640 --> 00:17:24,159 Speaker 1: that's weird. 323 00:17:24,400 --> 00:17:25,600 Speaker 4: I had the exact same thought. 324 00:17:25,920 --> 00:17:27,840 Speaker 2: I think they zoomed in on it so that you 325 00:17:27,840 --> 00:17:31,160 Speaker 2: would understand why I was crying, you know, like why 326 00:17:31,200 --> 00:17:34,480 Speaker 2: I was getting kind of teary eyed, or right the 327 00:17:34,520 --> 00:17:38,600 Speaker 2: onion was giving Susan so much trouble. I sort of recall, 328 00:17:39,760 --> 00:17:46,040 Speaker 2: you know, hearing that Leslie herself had some reservations about 329 00:17:46,080 --> 00:17:49,200 Speaker 2: playing my Mom because she didn't think she was old enough. 330 00:17:49,359 --> 00:17:51,320 Speaker 5: Like that that was a real thing. 331 00:17:52,160 --> 00:17:52,800 Speaker 4: But then. 332 00:17:54,200 --> 00:17:59,199 Speaker 2: I also recall hearing from Leslie later that that is 333 00:17:59,280 --> 00:18:06,280 Speaker 2: not true, that that was never said, and that I 334 00:18:06,320 --> 00:18:08,840 Speaker 2: don't know somebody in the writer's room made that up. 335 00:18:08,880 --> 00:18:12,800 Speaker 2: I do think there was some some some miscommunication that 336 00:18:12,880 --> 00:18:16,560 Speaker 2: went on back and forth over the times that she 337 00:18:16,720 --> 00:18:20,040 Speaker 2: was on the show, which I thought was interesting because 338 00:18:20,080 --> 00:18:22,760 Speaker 2: I do think it kind of the way I heard it, 339 00:18:22,760 --> 00:18:25,199 Speaker 2: it had to do with age and beauty, and I 340 00:18:25,240 --> 00:18:32,199 Speaker 2: do think that resonates so stereotypically, like women just have 341 00:18:32,320 --> 00:18:34,840 Speaker 2: to sort of put up with that like that somebody 342 00:18:34,880 --> 00:18:40,280 Speaker 2: would assume that an older actress would care when maybe 343 00:18:40,320 --> 00:18:44,679 Speaker 2: she didn't care, and and and I don't know. It 344 00:18:44,760 --> 00:18:47,280 Speaker 2: was also interesting for me watching it now because I thought, 345 00:18:47,280 --> 00:18:50,919 Speaker 2: I'm Leslie and Warren now like I'm I mean not 346 00:18:51,000 --> 00:18:54,960 Speaker 2: that I not that I'm saying that I'm as legendary 347 00:18:54,960 --> 00:18:57,120 Speaker 2: as her, but I mean I'm her, I'm the age 348 00:18:57,440 --> 00:19:00,960 Speaker 2: that she probably was when she came in to play 349 00:19:01,000 --> 00:19:04,959 Speaker 2: my mother. I'm now that person, and I wouldn't have 350 00:19:05,000 --> 00:19:07,320 Speaker 2: any problem with it, Like I would be thrilled to 351 00:19:07,400 --> 00:19:10,720 Speaker 2: be the Leslie and Warren in quote to the Susan 352 00:19:11,200 --> 00:19:11,719 Speaker 2: in quotes. 353 00:19:11,720 --> 00:19:12,360 Speaker 5: Do you know what I mean? 354 00:19:12,480 --> 00:19:15,399 Speaker 2: Like that would be a fun job. I just I 355 00:19:15,440 --> 00:19:20,639 Speaker 2: think actors want to keep working and and finding fun, 356 00:19:21,720 --> 00:19:25,000 Speaker 2: you know, roles And I think Sophie was a really great, 357 00:19:25,400 --> 00:19:27,399 Speaker 2: crazy role for her. 358 00:19:27,480 --> 00:19:33,760 Speaker 1: So she did so zany so fun. Obviously, it's it's 359 00:19:33,960 --> 00:19:37,399 Speaker 1: cool to get to watch Susan be the straight man 360 00:19:37,480 --> 00:19:41,119 Speaker 1: kind of character to her zaniness, considering that Susan's often 361 00:19:41,119 --> 00:19:45,280 Speaker 1: portrayed as the like flighty, ridiculous zany one herself. So 362 00:19:45,359 --> 00:19:47,600 Speaker 1: that was kind of a fun thing to flip that dynamic. 363 00:19:47,640 --> 00:19:50,439 Speaker 1: And also, not only did we get Leslie and Warren 364 00:19:50,520 --> 00:19:53,879 Speaker 1: now on the show, but she brings with her Morty 365 00:19:54,040 --> 00:19:56,200 Speaker 1: played by Bob Newhart. 366 00:19:56,640 --> 00:20:00,919 Speaker 5: Yeah, so this Marty beca first of all. 367 00:20:01,119 --> 00:20:05,080 Speaker 2: Okay, so I'm I would I'm freak out about Bob Newhart. 368 00:20:05,119 --> 00:20:07,040 Speaker 2: I mean, to me, you know I grew up like 369 00:20:07,200 --> 00:20:10,000 Speaker 2: watching all of the different variations of his show, like 370 00:20:10,200 --> 00:20:13,400 Speaker 2: I just love him. So I watched the scene with 371 00:20:13,440 --> 00:20:18,359 Speaker 2: Susan and Morty in the diner, and I was, I was, 372 00:20:18,480 --> 00:20:21,360 Speaker 2: I loved it so much, like I actually thought we 373 00:20:21,359 --> 00:20:26,120 Speaker 2: were both great, like I I, but I had no 374 00:20:26,320 --> 00:20:30,040 Speaker 2: recollection of it. And I was like, Terry, how could 375 00:20:30,080 --> 00:20:35,160 Speaker 2: you not remember doing a scene just one on one 376 00:20:35,840 --> 00:20:40,000 Speaker 2: with Bob Newhart? What is wrong with my brain that 377 00:20:40,240 --> 00:20:45,640 Speaker 2: I don't have an actual recollection of that? Like and 378 00:20:46,119 --> 00:20:48,880 Speaker 2: because I know if he walked in here right now, 379 00:20:48,920 --> 00:20:51,479 Speaker 2: you know what I mean, Like I know how I 380 00:20:51,560 --> 00:20:55,879 Speaker 2: feel about him, like he's just an icon and a brilliant, 381 00:20:56,160 --> 00:21:01,359 Speaker 2: brilliant comedian, like I must have treasured that so much, 382 00:21:01,440 --> 00:21:02,760 Speaker 2: But I don't. 383 00:21:03,600 --> 00:21:04,440 Speaker 5: I don't have the memory. 384 00:21:04,480 --> 00:21:06,080 Speaker 2: You know what I do have a memory of My 385 00:21:06,320 --> 00:21:11,240 Speaker 2: parents had an album collection that must be from the sixties, 386 00:21:12,040 --> 00:21:15,400 Speaker 2: and I remembered that they had a Bob Newhart comedy 387 00:21:15,880 --> 00:21:19,240 Speaker 2: album and I brought it to the set and he 388 00:21:19,359 --> 00:21:23,040 Speaker 2: autographed it for my parents. And not only that, he 389 00:21:23,160 --> 00:21:26,600 Speaker 2: invited them to go see his show in Vegas. And 390 00:21:26,640 --> 00:21:30,520 Speaker 2: when they got to Vegas, he put them up in 391 00:21:30,600 --> 00:21:36,120 Speaker 2: a better hotel room than I had gotten for my parents. 392 00:21:35,440 --> 00:21:40,840 Speaker 2: Oh yeah, and so he was so generous to my parents. 393 00:21:40,480 --> 00:21:42,600 Speaker 2: And I mean it's just. 394 00:21:42,840 --> 00:21:44,600 Speaker 4: Like, well, that's something that you remember. 395 00:21:44,920 --> 00:21:46,479 Speaker 1: Yeah, I was gonna say, I think if it were 396 00:21:46,560 --> 00:21:49,480 Speaker 1: up to him, he'd prefer that you remember that then 397 00:21:49,560 --> 00:21:51,760 Speaker 1: necessarily the one off diner scene. 398 00:21:51,800 --> 00:21:55,320 Speaker 2: But I want to say I also recall there being 399 00:21:55,560 --> 00:21:58,719 Speaker 2: some vibe of this, and I want to ask you 400 00:21:58,760 --> 00:22:00,520 Speaker 2: guys what you think, because I know I had an 401 00:22:00,520 --> 00:22:03,600 Speaker 2: opinion about it. So as the show was going on, 402 00:22:04,080 --> 00:22:06,760 Speaker 2: you know, we got Bob Newhart, we got ended up 403 00:22:06,760 --> 00:22:09,439 Speaker 2: getting Carol Burnett, there were. 404 00:22:09,320 --> 00:22:11,560 Speaker 5: Some other like Lily Tomlin. 405 00:22:11,359 --> 00:22:14,840 Speaker 2: Lily Tomlin like and there was a little bit of 406 00:22:14,880 --> 00:22:17,439 Speaker 2: a thing where you started to go is this the 407 00:22:17,560 --> 00:22:21,760 Speaker 2: love Boat? Like what's happening? And you know, like like 408 00:22:22,480 --> 00:22:27,520 Speaker 2: when does the stunt casting? When is it so big 409 00:22:28,520 --> 00:22:32,320 Speaker 2: that now you're not watching Desperate Housewives anymore? Now you're 410 00:22:32,920 --> 00:22:36,480 Speaker 2: watching like the love Boat was known for. We're going 411 00:22:36,560 --> 00:22:40,199 Speaker 2: to get these great actors that everybody loves and cherishes, 412 00:22:40,800 --> 00:22:42,040 Speaker 2: and we're going to have them. 413 00:22:41,880 --> 00:22:44,000 Speaker 5: Do a story and that'll be really cool. 414 00:22:44,119 --> 00:22:47,960 Speaker 2: And I remember being like, yeah, this is really cool 415 00:22:48,000 --> 00:22:51,320 Speaker 2: because obviously these are the most iconic actors ever. But 416 00:22:52,320 --> 00:22:55,679 Speaker 2: is it servicing the peace? And I'm not sure that 417 00:22:55,760 --> 00:22:56,120 Speaker 2: it did. 418 00:22:56,320 --> 00:22:57,840 Speaker 4: I like to push back on that. 419 00:22:58,160 --> 00:23:02,480 Speaker 3: Yeah, you were thinking about how TV airs today when 420 00:23:02,560 --> 00:23:05,840 Speaker 3: you like have a limited series drop and you're watching 421 00:23:05,880 --> 00:23:09,480 Speaker 3: something really as a piece. But I would argue, I mean, 422 00:23:09,520 --> 00:23:11,800 Speaker 3: and we learned this when we were talking to Jamie 423 00:23:12,400 --> 00:23:16,040 Speaker 3: for ABC that had all these failed shows where you're 424 00:23:16,040 --> 00:23:18,840 Speaker 3: trying to get people to tune back in every week, 425 00:23:19,280 --> 00:23:21,480 Speaker 3: and you have an iconic show that then gets to 426 00:23:21,480 --> 00:23:24,080 Speaker 3: be a vehicle for such amazing guest stars that people 427 00:23:24,119 --> 00:23:27,720 Speaker 3: would want to see. I actually think it makes a 428 00:23:27,720 --> 00:23:29,920 Speaker 3: lot of sense, and I think there's something as a 429 00:23:30,040 --> 00:23:33,760 Speaker 3: viewer to me now that is it puts Desperate Housewives 430 00:23:33,760 --> 00:23:40,880 Speaker 3: in this other category of kind of iconography. That's I think, 431 00:23:40,960 --> 00:23:43,360 Speaker 3: really beautiful. I don't know if Andrew you agree or disagree, 432 00:23:43,400 --> 00:23:44,520 Speaker 3: but I don't bump on it. 433 00:23:44,960 --> 00:23:49,679 Speaker 1: I also don't bump on it with our particular guest stars. 434 00:23:49,680 --> 00:23:52,480 Speaker 1: I would say I think that if they were more 435 00:23:53,680 --> 00:23:57,159 Speaker 1: specifically pop culture of the moment, maybe it would have 436 00:23:57,160 --> 00:23:58,720 Speaker 1: felt like it was taking me out of it. But 437 00:23:58,800 --> 00:24:03,480 Speaker 1: because they were in the examples, we've given more of 438 00:24:03,520 --> 00:24:08,439 Speaker 1: the like iconic Hollywood fixture, amazing career, veteran type of 439 00:24:08,480 --> 00:24:13,120 Speaker 1: actors coming on. To me, it feels like really added value. 440 00:24:13,480 --> 00:24:16,680 Speaker 1: And also there's some things that are stacked on top 441 00:24:16,720 --> 00:24:19,240 Speaker 1: of each other that made Desperate Housewives I think, really 442 00:24:19,280 --> 00:24:23,359 Speaker 1: have this special magic world, which was even the street 443 00:24:23,400 --> 00:24:26,119 Speaker 1: that we filmed on, right, it had such a Hollywood history. 444 00:24:26,160 --> 00:24:27,600 Speaker 1: It's like the Leave It to Beaver House and the 445 00:24:27,680 --> 00:24:29,920 Speaker 1: Monster House and all of this, and so in a way, 446 00:24:30,520 --> 00:24:33,080 Speaker 1: it kind of feels symbiotic that those are the type 447 00:24:33,080 --> 00:24:36,560 Speaker 1: of guest stars we got to have, and it lands 448 00:24:36,600 --> 00:24:40,320 Speaker 1: in a pretty special way with me. But I do 449 00:24:40,440 --> 00:24:43,800 Speaker 1: agree that sometimes when that happens, you know, like on 450 00:24:43,880 --> 00:24:46,159 Speaker 1: a CSI I remember when they had Justin bieber On 451 00:24:46,240 --> 00:24:47,840 Speaker 1: as a guest star, and then I think they had 452 00:24:47,920 --> 00:24:51,280 Speaker 1: Taylor's swift, You're just like, come on, like, you know, 453 00:24:51,440 --> 00:24:54,080 Speaker 1: even if he did an amazing job, it's still like, 454 00:24:54,400 --> 00:24:56,479 Speaker 1: I'm how am I supposed to separate this? 455 00:24:56,680 --> 00:24:56,879 Speaker 2: You know? 456 00:24:57,080 --> 00:25:00,280 Speaker 1: So I think it can backfire, And I think that's 457 00:25:00,280 --> 00:25:01,359 Speaker 1: a really interesting point. 458 00:25:01,600 --> 00:25:01,800 Speaker 5: Well. 459 00:25:01,840 --> 00:25:06,840 Speaker 3: I think speaking of Susan and Morty and Sophie, you 460 00:25:06,960 --> 00:25:10,280 Speaker 3: realize the reason that Susan is pushing her mom to 461 00:25:10,320 --> 00:25:14,000 Speaker 3: get back together with her boyfriend, who they clearly have 462 00:25:14,200 --> 00:25:18,880 Speaker 3: like a low key physical assaulting relationship with each other. 463 00:25:19,640 --> 00:25:22,000 Speaker 3: I mean, it's kind of when they're beating each other 464 00:25:22,119 --> 00:25:25,480 Speaker 3: up in the parking lot and Susan has to interfere. 465 00:25:25,359 --> 00:25:26,920 Speaker 1: Sophie's biting his shoulder. 466 00:25:27,160 --> 00:25:27,399 Speaker 5: I know. 467 00:25:27,840 --> 00:25:32,720 Speaker 3: Crazy is because Sophie is saying that she now doesn't 468 00:25:32,720 --> 00:25:34,800 Speaker 3: have anywhere to live, that she's not with Morty, and 469 00:25:34,840 --> 00:25:37,879 Speaker 3: she thinks she can move in with Susan, and Susan says, 470 00:25:38,080 --> 00:25:43,000 Speaker 3: I can't possibly have this. Here's a question, would you 471 00:25:43,119 --> 00:25:46,760 Speaker 3: let your parents live with you? Is that something you 472 00:25:46,800 --> 00:25:50,120 Speaker 3: could in your own individual relationship with your parent tolerate? 473 00:25:51,320 --> 00:25:54,520 Speaker 1: I will answer yes, I would let my parents live 474 00:25:54,560 --> 00:25:57,240 Speaker 1: with me. I do think boundaries are obviously very important, 475 00:25:57,280 --> 00:26:01,199 Speaker 1: but I would answer yes. So found it just so 476 00:26:01,480 --> 00:26:05,360 Speaker 1: incredible that this was a Susan arc and a Susan 477 00:26:05,560 --> 00:26:08,240 Speaker 1: storyline and a Susan line when she says that we 478 00:26:08,320 --> 00:26:10,520 Speaker 1: end up parenting our parents, because as we've talked about 479 00:26:10,560 --> 00:26:14,280 Speaker 1: with Terry so much, you now very much have stepped 480 00:26:14,280 --> 00:26:16,399 Speaker 1: into that role for your own parents. 481 00:26:16,800 --> 00:26:18,960 Speaker 2: And this morning, this morning, I got the call that 482 00:26:19,000 --> 00:26:21,119 Speaker 2: my dad needed to go to the dentist and you know, 483 00:26:21,200 --> 00:26:23,640 Speaker 2: they couldn't solve that themselves. 484 00:26:23,760 --> 00:26:26,320 Speaker 5: Like you know, they don't remembery. 485 00:26:25,720 --> 00:26:28,560 Speaker 4: One, but what I said, they're ninety one. 486 00:26:28,760 --> 00:26:31,600 Speaker 2: Right, and they and they didn't remember that they'd seen 487 00:26:31,640 --> 00:26:34,560 Speaker 2: a dentist. They didn't remember where the dentist was. They 488 00:26:34,560 --> 00:26:37,760 Speaker 2: didn't you know, obviously it's part of my caregiving role. 489 00:26:37,800 --> 00:26:41,320 Speaker 2: But like, yeah, that that you are parenting your your 490 00:26:41,359 --> 00:26:42,440 Speaker 2: parents for sure, and. 491 00:26:42,680 --> 00:26:44,600 Speaker 4: You would never let them live with you. 492 00:26:44,920 --> 00:26:47,720 Speaker 5: I could not would that it would. 493 00:26:47,760 --> 00:26:51,280 Speaker 2: But that's because you know I and I think I've 494 00:26:51,280 --> 00:26:55,399 Speaker 2: talked about this somewhat here also, like I had a 495 00:26:55,520 --> 00:27:01,359 Speaker 2: really not wonderful childhood and and not a wonderful dynamic 496 00:27:01,960 --> 00:27:08,280 Speaker 2: between my parents. It was a very difficult, complicated, fused, 497 00:27:08,960 --> 00:27:15,560 Speaker 2: not positive scenario. And they have not really changed. I 498 00:27:15,680 --> 00:27:23,560 Speaker 2: have changed, and I cannot get sucked into what feels 499 00:27:23,680 --> 00:27:27,640 Speaker 2: uncomfortable about it the way that I couldn't protect myself 500 00:27:27,640 --> 00:27:30,680 Speaker 2: from when I was younger and certainly when I was 501 00:27:30,720 --> 00:27:35,159 Speaker 2: a child. And again, I've also done the work, so 502 00:27:35,240 --> 00:27:37,840 Speaker 2: there's a lot of forgiveness. I'm not complaining. I'm not 503 00:27:37,960 --> 00:27:39,080 Speaker 2: a victim, you know. 504 00:27:39,600 --> 00:27:40,080 Speaker 5: All of that. 505 00:27:40,920 --> 00:27:44,639 Speaker 2: But what I do know is that I couldn't you know, 506 00:27:44,840 --> 00:27:48,520 Speaker 2: it is about creating boundaries and I couldn't do that. 507 00:27:48,600 --> 00:27:52,000 Speaker 2: And I am lucky enough to have a choice to 508 00:27:52,080 --> 00:27:55,680 Speaker 2: be able to care for them on terms that don't 509 00:27:55,680 --> 00:27:58,240 Speaker 2: feel like they violate my sense of peace. 510 00:28:07,920 --> 00:28:10,760 Speaker 1: And Emerson, can we I mean, yeah, I was, because 511 00:28:10,800 --> 00:28:12,160 Speaker 1: your mom's sitting sitting here. 512 00:28:12,400 --> 00:28:12,560 Speaker 2: Yeah. 513 00:28:13,880 --> 00:28:17,480 Speaker 3: Luck with this answer, Well, the only answer I could 514 00:28:17,560 --> 00:28:20,160 Speaker 3: possibly give to this question would be yes. 515 00:28:21,119 --> 00:28:22,760 Speaker 4: I mean, it would be a bit complicated to have. 516 00:28:22,720 --> 00:28:26,320 Speaker 3: My parents, uh or all live with me, given that 517 00:28:26,320 --> 00:28:29,240 Speaker 3: they're divorced. And I don't know, like I'd love to 518 00:28:29,280 --> 00:28:31,320 Speaker 3: imagine a world in which I have a huge enough 519 00:28:31,440 --> 00:28:34,359 Speaker 3: estate that I could pull that off. Uh, certainly don't 520 00:28:34,359 --> 00:28:36,960 Speaker 3: have that going for me right now. You know. It's 521 00:28:36,960 --> 00:28:40,640 Speaker 3: funny this week, actually, for a myriad of different reasons, 522 00:28:41,160 --> 00:28:43,640 Speaker 3: I ended up staying with my mom for the week 523 00:28:43,760 --> 00:28:47,760 Speaker 3: I was out of my house, and I have to 524 00:28:47,800 --> 00:28:53,680 Speaker 3: say I think that we cohabitated together very well. I 525 00:28:54,120 --> 00:28:56,239 Speaker 3: you know, went in and out through the garage, I 526 00:28:56,280 --> 00:28:58,640 Speaker 3: did my own thing, We saw each other a few times. 527 00:28:59,000 --> 00:29:01,040 Speaker 4: I felt no little nervous at first. 528 00:29:01,040 --> 00:29:02,480 Speaker 3: Am I going to feel a kind of pressure that 529 00:29:02,520 --> 00:29:03,960 Speaker 3: we have to check in with each other about like 530 00:29:03,960 --> 00:29:07,280 Speaker 3: what we're doing? On our respective days, and that was 531 00:29:07,320 --> 00:29:09,480 Speaker 3: not the dynamic, and I was really grateful for it, 532 00:29:09,520 --> 00:29:11,560 Speaker 3: and I was really grateful for the place that we've 533 00:29:11,600 --> 00:29:15,640 Speaker 3: evolved to in our adult relationship with each other that 534 00:29:15,640 --> 00:29:17,720 Speaker 3: that could actually feel like being at your house for 535 00:29:17,800 --> 00:29:21,760 Speaker 3: a bit and living together felt very restorative and actually 536 00:29:21,760 --> 00:29:24,800 Speaker 3: relaxing to me and not like, oh gosh, I have 537 00:29:24,960 --> 00:29:26,800 Speaker 3: no of my own personal time. 538 00:29:27,760 --> 00:29:28,680 Speaker 4: That said, I. 539 00:29:28,600 --> 00:29:31,280 Speaker 3: Will say I think my mom falls on the side 540 00:29:31,360 --> 00:29:34,400 Speaker 3: of She constantly says to me, I am putting in 541 00:29:34,480 --> 00:29:37,000 Speaker 3: place all of the things so you do not have 542 00:29:37,080 --> 00:29:38,840 Speaker 3: to take care of me when I am Gramma and 543 00:29:38,920 --> 00:29:41,840 Speaker 3: Grandpa's age. And I don't want to, you know, put 544 00:29:41,840 --> 00:29:46,120 Speaker 3: that on you, but I would, I would accept it, 545 00:29:46,160 --> 00:29:48,320 Speaker 3: and I think that we would be able to navigate 546 00:29:48,360 --> 00:29:49,080 Speaker 3: that smoothly. 547 00:29:49,480 --> 00:29:50,920 Speaker 5: That is the correct answer. 548 00:29:51,960 --> 00:29:53,880 Speaker 4: I got it check. 549 00:29:53,960 --> 00:29:56,600 Speaker 1: I think also just as a as an assumption, I 550 00:29:56,600 --> 00:29:59,920 Speaker 1: think Julie and Susan would be able to live together. 551 00:30:00,120 --> 00:30:01,520 Speaker 5: Maybe I think so too. 552 00:30:01,680 --> 00:30:05,240 Speaker 2: I I don't know Susan. I think, well, maybe Susan 553 00:30:05,240 --> 00:30:08,600 Speaker 2: evolves throughout. You know, Susan leans a little more Sophie 554 00:30:08,680 --> 00:30:11,960 Speaker 2: to me than Terry, so she oh, yes, might Yeah, 555 00:30:12,000 --> 00:30:15,040 Speaker 2: Susan might drive me crazy or might drive you crazy. 556 00:30:14,760 --> 00:30:15,400 Speaker 5: Living with her. 557 00:30:15,720 --> 00:30:17,840 Speaker 2: But it's very it's very nice of you to be 558 00:30:17,920 --> 00:30:21,080 Speaker 2: so generous as a Julie representative. 559 00:30:21,280 --> 00:30:25,400 Speaker 1: Yes, yes, yeah, we have the we you know, sticking 560 00:30:25,440 --> 00:30:28,520 Speaker 1: with the kind of overall theme of parenting and motherhood 561 00:30:29,480 --> 00:30:35,800 Speaker 1: we mentioned. You mentioned Terry at the top. This spanking storyline, 562 00:30:36,080 --> 00:30:40,200 Speaker 1: which is interesting for so many reasons obviously, like is 563 00:30:40,240 --> 00:30:43,080 Speaker 1: it okay to discipline your children your friend's kids, Like 564 00:30:43,120 --> 00:30:46,240 Speaker 1: how do we fall on that physical discipline in general? 565 00:30:46,280 --> 00:30:48,240 Speaker 1: Where do we fall on that? But there's a couple 566 00:30:48,280 --> 00:30:54,680 Speaker 1: of one. I really thought you have Lynette yet again 567 00:30:55,320 --> 00:30:58,360 Speaker 1: so desperate for help with her kids, you know, I 568 00:30:58,360 --> 00:31:01,520 Speaker 1: mean this this theme of her just being overwhelmed by 569 00:31:01,520 --> 00:31:04,280 Speaker 1: her children is so persistent, you know, it's it's really 570 00:31:04,320 --> 00:31:07,480 Speaker 1: like the main driver of her in this series. And 571 00:31:07,520 --> 00:31:09,480 Speaker 1: so she shows up at Breeze and she's like, I 572 00:31:09,560 --> 00:31:12,320 Speaker 1: put on makeup, I have a dress on, Like, please help. 573 00:31:12,160 --> 00:31:14,200 Speaker 4: Me, and she just wants to get a margarita for 574 00:31:14,280 --> 00:31:14,880 Speaker 4: Christ's sake. 575 00:31:15,120 --> 00:31:19,840 Speaker 1: Yeah haven't we all been there? And breathe relents and says, okay, 576 00:31:19,960 --> 00:31:23,320 Speaker 1: you know, come on in, and then she's she's parenting her, 577 00:31:23,600 --> 00:31:26,120 Speaker 1: She's parenting Lynette's kids the way she would parent her own, 578 00:31:27,040 --> 00:31:28,800 Speaker 1: which is very different than Lynette's and she ends up 579 00:31:28,840 --> 00:31:31,960 Speaker 1: spanking one of the boys and it leads us into 580 00:31:32,000 --> 00:31:33,720 Speaker 1: this tense poker scene with all the women where they 581 00:31:33,720 --> 00:31:36,480 Speaker 1: go head to head about is that okay? And Lynette 582 00:31:36,560 --> 00:31:39,440 Speaker 1: is like absolutely not not okay, And you know, but 583 00:31:39,600 --> 00:31:43,240 Speaker 1: I thought the whole there's some other undertones here that 584 00:31:43,240 --> 00:31:46,320 Speaker 1: I thought were really interesting, like Lynette and her empty 585 00:31:46,320 --> 00:31:49,960 Speaker 1: threats to the boys and them not working is something 586 00:31:50,080 --> 00:31:50,840 Speaker 1: to face. 587 00:31:51,400 --> 00:31:51,560 Speaker 2: Now. 588 00:31:51,600 --> 00:31:53,840 Speaker 1: That doesn't mean you should start spanking them as a 589 00:31:53,840 --> 00:31:56,480 Speaker 1: reaction to that, but like the empty threats in parenthood, 590 00:31:56,600 --> 00:32:00,960 Speaker 1: children are smart and they will realize, oh oh, this 591 00:32:01,120 --> 00:32:04,800 Speaker 1: level of authority doesn't actually yield to anything. 592 00:32:05,120 --> 00:32:08,240 Speaker 2: That's one of my things that you that I would, 593 00:32:08,400 --> 00:32:12,840 Speaker 2: you know, offer to people who are raising young children, 594 00:32:12,960 --> 00:32:15,000 Speaker 2: like you can't do that, like that thing of where 595 00:32:15,000 --> 00:32:17,560 Speaker 2: you go if you do one more thing, we're going 596 00:32:17,640 --> 00:32:19,360 Speaker 2: to get up and we're going to leave this restaurant. 597 00:32:19,840 --> 00:32:21,840 Speaker 5: And then they do the one more thing. You have 598 00:32:21,920 --> 00:32:24,080 Speaker 5: to be prepared as the adult because. 599 00:32:23,880 --> 00:32:26,520 Speaker 2: What when you make that threat, it means you will 600 00:32:26,560 --> 00:32:29,000 Speaker 2: also not be eating your dinner and you will not 601 00:32:29,080 --> 00:32:31,160 Speaker 2: be you know, when you say like we're going to 602 00:32:31,320 --> 00:32:34,680 Speaker 2: leave the show or we're going to leave the amusement 603 00:32:34,720 --> 00:32:37,640 Speaker 2: park or whatever it is that you use as that threat. 604 00:32:38,200 --> 00:32:41,960 Speaker 2: Do not make the threat unless you are willing to 605 00:32:42,040 --> 00:32:45,720 Speaker 2: do it. And I don't mean it like threat threat 606 00:32:45,760 --> 00:32:48,160 Speaker 2: with spanking, because I don't agree with that. But I 607 00:32:48,240 --> 00:32:51,840 Speaker 2: have seen parents go like, you know, if you act 608 00:32:51,880 --> 00:32:53,520 Speaker 2: to if you throw that thing at the table one 609 00:32:53,560 --> 00:32:55,760 Speaker 2: more time, we're going to leave this restaurant. And then 610 00:32:55,800 --> 00:32:57,840 Speaker 2: they don't right then that that. 611 00:32:58,040 --> 00:33:00,120 Speaker 5: Just you know, then it's just worthless. 612 00:33:00,800 --> 00:33:03,160 Speaker 1: Or it's like the counting, the counting that parents do. 613 00:33:03,280 --> 00:33:05,360 Speaker 1: It's like, there, I'm going to count to three, and 614 00:33:05,400 --> 00:33:08,560 Speaker 1: then what happens after three? Often nothing like four and 615 00:33:08,720 --> 00:33:12,800 Speaker 1: five and six, you know, and you're like, well, okay, 616 00:33:13,400 --> 00:33:14,800 Speaker 1: how long are you to keep counting? 617 00:33:15,280 --> 00:33:19,800 Speaker 2: Yeah, but I will say that this without directly answering 618 00:33:20,120 --> 00:33:22,680 Speaker 2: this question and kind of skipping over to the end. 619 00:33:23,560 --> 00:33:26,880 Speaker 5: I did love the resolve. 620 00:33:26,680 --> 00:33:32,200 Speaker 2: Between Lynette and Brie, and I could wish for my 621 00:33:32,280 --> 00:33:35,000 Speaker 2: own personal life that I had a little bit more 622 00:33:35,680 --> 00:33:39,280 Speaker 2: of this ability. But what happens between them is they're 623 00:33:39,280 --> 00:33:42,560 Speaker 2: across the street from each other. They've had all this 624 00:33:42,640 --> 00:33:47,960 Speaker 2: sort of confrontation about what Breeze done and Linette didn't 625 00:33:47,960 --> 00:33:51,760 Speaker 2: think was right, and then breez'ze like, well, you're not 626 00:33:51,840 --> 00:33:54,440 Speaker 2: a good mom because you don't you know, your kids 627 00:33:54,440 --> 00:33:57,160 Speaker 2: are crazy, and so there's been all this confrontation and 628 00:33:57,280 --> 00:34:05,280 Speaker 2: basically Linette crosses the street physically and metaphorically, I guess, 629 00:34:05,600 --> 00:34:10,799 Speaker 2: or or is that the right word? Yeah, symbolically, maybe 630 00:34:10,800 --> 00:34:13,680 Speaker 2: that's that's better, and and says, you know, hey, I 631 00:34:13,680 --> 00:34:18,440 Speaker 2: want to apologize, and then bree says, you walking across 632 00:34:18,480 --> 00:34:22,359 Speaker 2: the street what meant everything to me? And I want 633 00:34:22,360 --> 00:34:26,480 Speaker 2: to apologize to you, and I I was so And 634 00:34:26,520 --> 00:34:28,840 Speaker 2: then they sort of head off into the house to 635 00:34:28,920 --> 00:34:33,840 Speaker 2: get coffee and laugh about life together. And I felt 636 00:34:33,920 --> 00:34:39,440 Speaker 2: so envious, I think really of the ease in which 637 00:34:39,480 --> 00:34:42,920 Speaker 2: they apologize to each other. There was like a mutual 638 00:34:43,000 --> 00:34:46,279 Speaker 2: respect there, and then they let it go and moved on. 639 00:34:47,360 --> 00:34:51,480 Speaker 2: And I don't know that I have that tool and 640 00:34:51,520 --> 00:34:53,520 Speaker 2: I don't love that about myself. 641 00:34:56,120 --> 00:34:59,279 Speaker 5: Yeah, and I do you guys? Is that and it? 642 00:34:59,360 --> 00:35:03,719 Speaker 5: Do you see yourself in confrontation? I was I being able 643 00:35:03,800 --> 00:35:04,319 Speaker 5: to do that. 644 00:35:04,800 --> 00:35:07,680 Speaker 3: I was really moved by that scene too, on the 645 00:35:07,760 --> 00:35:12,399 Speaker 3: kind of symbolic level that crossing the street stands for 646 00:35:12,560 --> 00:35:14,560 Speaker 3: of saying, you know, I'm gonna I'm gonna be able 647 00:35:14,560 --> 00:35:19,360 Speaker 3: to let this go and re engage in our friendship 648 00:35:19,400 --> 00:35:23,719 Speaker 3: with each other. And I think I do pride myself 649 00:35:23,760 --> 00:35:28,759 Speaker 3: actually in feeling like I have the ability to let 650 00:35:28,800 --> 00:35:32,560 Speaker 3: things go, sometimes with great difficulty. I mean sometimes I think, 651 00:35:32,640 --> 00:35:34,719 Speaker 3: you know, tools like therapy like that can be a 652 00:35:34,719 --> 00:35:38,879 Speaker 3: really helpful place to really investigate what is coming up 653 00:35:38,920 --> 00:35:41,600 Speaker 3: for me that is making this so hard for me 654 00:35:41,640 --> 00:35:45,239 Speaker 3: to let go or to forgive someone. And almost always 655 00:35:45,800 --> 00:35:49,520 Speaker 3: it is not about the other person. It is about 656 00:35:49,800 --> 00:35:52,640 Speaker 3: whatever it's reflecting in myself. That's a character trait in 657 00:35:52,680 --> 00:35:54,640 Speaker 3: myself that I don't like. I mean, I was actually 658 00:35:54,640 --> 00:35:57,640 Speaker 3: talking to a friend of mine who spent some time 659 00:35:57,760 --> 00:36:01,400 Speaker 3: in rehab, and he was saying, like, oh, a classic 660 00:36:01,560 --> 00:36:05,440 Speaker 3: rehab phrase is if you spot it, you got it. 661 00:36:07,520 --> 00:36:09,640 Speaker 3: And it's kind of something that I think, Andrew, You've 662 00:36:09,680 --> 00:36:12,719 Speaker 3: said your sister mentioning that, like, if someone's really bothering you, 663 00:36:13,160 --> 00:36:17,160 Speaker 3: what is it about yourself that you don't like about yourself? 664 00:36:17,200 --> 00:36:20,160 Speaker 3: That's the right that person is bothering in you. So 665 00:36:20,200 --> 00:36:22,279 Speaker 3: I think keeping all that in mind can make it 666 00:36:22,360 --> 00:36:26,600 Speaker 3: easier to forgive and move on from things. But I 667 00:36:26,600 --> 00:36:29,400 Speaker 3: think the other thing I remind myself when I'm struggling 668 00:36:30,160 --> 00:36:35,040 Speaker 3: to let something go is who is benefiting or who 669 00:36:35,120 --> 00:36:39,680 Speaker 3: is being hurt by me holding onto this? And honestly, 670 00:36:39,800 --> 00:36:43,799 Speaker 3: it's me I one being hurt by holding onto it, 671 00:36:44,239 --> 00:36:46,280 Speaker 3: And if it is someone who I have an important 672 00:36:46,280 --> 00:36:49,480 Speaker 3: relationship with, I am the one benefiting from letting it go. 673 00:36:50,080 --> 00:36:54,799 Speaker 3: And it's not actually about them. They don't really have 674 00:36:54,880 --> 00:36:57,080 Speaker 3: a choice, and if I hang on to something or not, 675 00:36:57,440 --> 00:36:59,759 Speaker 3: so they're gonna have to go on with their life regardless, 676 00:37:01,440 --> 00:37:03,880 Speaker 3: and I'm the one that's going to suffer with holding 677 00:37:03,920 --> 00:37:07,960 Speaker 3: this arbitrary line that then keeps these like negative feelings 678 00:37:08,000 --> 00:37:11,600 Speaker 3: trapped in my body and my soul and myself. And 679 00:37:11,680 --> 00:37:15,960 Speaker 3: I think thinking about that lets me practice forgiveness a 680 00:37:16,000 --> 00:37:17,960 Speaker 3: lot more in my life. And I was moved by 681 00:37:18,000 --> 00:37:19,240 Speaker 3: this scene too for that reason. 682 00:37:19,760 --> 00:37:22,880 Speaker 1: And I just think it's really cool that we're getting 683 00:37:22,880 --> 00:37:26,799 Speaker 1: to rewatch Desperate Housewives and not only be entertained and 684 00:37:26,840 --> 00:37:29,359 Speaker 1: not be reminded by the memories and all the things 685 00:37:29,360 --> 00:37:31,200 Speaker 1: that come with it, but also sometimes we get these 686 00:37:31,239 --> 00:37:35,440 Speaker 1: beautiful little life lessons. And watching this scene made me 687 00:37:36,280 --> 00:37:40,799 Speaker 1: think that I should pay attention more in my life 688 00:37:40,960 --> 00:37:43,640 Speaker 1: when an apology doesn't come in the form of the 689 00:37:43,760 --> 00:37:49,319 Speaker 1: words i'm sorry, because I think oftentimes people apologize in 690 00:37:49,400 --> 00:37:52,040 Speaker 1: other ways, but we're waiting, or we're hung up or 691 00:37:52,080 --> 00:37:54,360 Speaker 1: I'm hung up on the idea of hearing the words 692 00:37:54,400 --> 00:37:55,040 Speaker 1: i'm sorry. 693 00:37:55,760 --> 00:37:56,800 Speaker 4: But it can be incredible. 694 00:37:56,880 --> 00:37:59,120 Speaker 1: It's so much more powerful if it comes in the 695 00:37:59,160 --> 00:38:02,960 Speaker 1: form of something else, like in Lynette, just merely crossing 696 00:38:03,040 --> 00:38:07,160 Speaker 1: the street and physically moving closer to breathe that was enough, 697 00:38:07,160 --> 00:38:08,840 Speaker 1: and I thought that was really powerful. I want to 698 00:38:08,840 --> 00:38:11,600 Speaker 1: pay more attention to that, because I think that we 699 00:38:11,640 --> 00:38:15,799 Speaker 1: talk about this all the time in life and in relationships, 700 00:38:15,840 --> 00:38:17,520 Speaker 1: and things that comes up like are you someone who 701 00:38:17,520 --> 00:38:20,200 Speaker 1: can say sorry? Or like can you admit I'm wrong? 702 00:38:20,360 --> 00:38:20,520 Speaker 3: Right? 703 00:38:20,560 --> 00:38:23,440 Speaker 1: Like that comes up all the time in social dynamics, 704 00:38:23,480 --> 00:38:26,239 Speaker 1: and I like to think that I'm pretty good at 705 00:38:26,280 --> 00:38:29,239 Speaker 1: saying I'm sorry. But I also just want to make 706 00:38:29,239 --> 00:38:32,520 Speaker 1: sure I'm not missing or dismissing the moments in my 707 00:38:32,680 --> 00:38:39,680 Speaker 1: relationships where people often show me an awareness of wrongdoing 708 00:38:39,800 --> 00:38:43,600 Speaker 1: or something that hurt me, but doesn't necessarily come in 709 00:38:43,680 --> 00:38:46,560 Speaker 1: the words i'm sorry. And I thought that was cool, 710 00:38:46,719 --> 00:38:49,960 Speaker 1: that that's how that storyline kind of wrapped itself up 711 00:38:50,280 --> 00:38:52,240 Speaker 1: and a really insight into their friendship. 712 00:38:52,520 --> 00:38:55,920 Speaker 2: It's a very good example, especially very relevant today. I 713 00:38:55,960 --> 00:39:02,120 Speaker 2: feel like, again, there's just so much vision and so 714 00:39:02,280 --> 00:39:07,120 Speaker 2: much judgment and so much like people standing in their 715 00:39:07,200 --> 00:39:09,640 Speaker 2: cement shoes on the side of the street of like 716 00:39:09,800 --> 00:39:12,360 Speaker 2: I'm right, and then on the other side they're like 717 00:39:12,480 --> 00:39:15,960 Speaker 2: I'm right, and and nobody's willing to step out of 718 00:39:16,000 --> 00:39:18,600 Speaker 2: their cement shoes and cross the street and say you 719 00:39:18,640 --> 00:39:21,279 Speaker 2: know what, like let's just move on. 720 00:39:22,040 --> 00:39:25,080 Speaker 3: I think the other storyline that involves Brie that this 721 00:39:25,160 --> 00:39:27,799 Speaker 3: is making me think of the idea of there are 722 00:39:27,920 --> 00:39:31,320 Speaker 3: other ways to say I'm sorry or to maybe admit 723 00:39:31,400 --> 00:39:32,440 Speaker 3: fault is. 724 00:39:32,560 --> 00:39:34,800 Speaker 4: Brie is really struggling with. 725 00:39:34,920 --> 00:39:39,080 Speaker 3: If she was a bad mother, and if she knows 726 00:39:39,520 --> 00:39:43,239 Speaker 3: her son, and like what role she has taken to 727 00:39:43,480 --> 00:39:48,280 Speaker 3: driving her son to be now at this youth camp. 728 00:39:49,360 --> 00:39:52,480 Speaker 3: And I found it so interesting and moving and sad 729 00:39:52,840 --> 00:39:55,000 Speaker 3: the scene when she's trying to get ready to go 730 00:39:55,120 --> 00:39:57,279 Speaker 3: to the counseling and she goes, I don't even know 731 00:39:57,360 --> 00:39:59,600 Speaker 3: what his favorite color is. 732 00:40:01,320 --> 00:40:02,359 Speaker 4: And she knows her. 733 00:40:02,320 --> 00:40:05,319 Speaker 3: Husband, she knows Rex's, she knows her daughter's, and I 734 00:40:05,440 --> 00:40:06,080 Speaker 3: was curious. 735 00:40:07,200 --> 00:40:09,960 Speaker 4: I mean, to both of you, but what do you. 736 00:40:10,080 --> 00:40:14,359 Speaker 3: Feel like the important ways to know your child are? 737 00:40:14,520 --> 00:40:17,239 Speaker 3: Because I kind of almost went, I don't know that 738 00:40:17,280 --> 00:40:19,960 Speaker 3: it's important to know, Like the favorite color feels so trivial, 739 00:40:20,000 --> 00:40:22,160 Speaker 3: but obviously it stands for something so much. 740 00:40:22,239 --> 00:40:25,319 Speaker 2: Right, But she says, She says, I should if I'm 741 00:40:25,360 --> 00:40:28,799 Speaker 2: a good mother, I should know everything about my son. 742 00:40:28,920 --> 00:40:31,400 Speaker 2: I should know everything about my son, and I should 743 00:40:31,440 --> 00:40:33,239 Speaker 2: always know how to help him. 744 00:40:33,600 --> 00:40:35,120 Speaker 3: I mean, and boy, is she in for a bigger 745 00:40:35,160 --> 00:40:38,080 Speaker 3: surprise of something she doesn't know about her son when and. 746 00:40:38,160 --> 00:40:42,520 Speaker 2: I actually was like, I feel very differently about that. 747 00:40:42,800 --> 00:40:47,680 Speaker 2: I feel like it's important for you. I'm just speaking 748 00:40:47,719 --> 00:40:50,239 Speaker 2: to you because you're my daughter and you're here. Like 749 00:40:50,880 --> 00:40:53,319 Speaker 2: I've always felt like it was important for you to 750 00:40:53,400 --> 00:40:58,120 Speaker 2: have privacy. I felt like it was in I feel 751 00:40:58,120 --> 00:41:03,560 Speaker 2: like it's like egotistical or you know, for me to 752 00:41:03,640 --> 00:41:07,120 Speaker 2: think like I should be privy to knowing everything about you. 753 00:41:07,120 --> 00:41:12,440 Speaker 2: You know, I look forward to when you share things 754 00:41:12,480 --> 00:41:16,960 Speaker 2: with me. I feel like the thing I concentrated on, 755 00:41:17,000 --> 00:41:20,680 Speaker 2: what I thought being a good mother was was instilling 756 00:41:20,840 --> 00:41:27,720 Speaker 2: in you the characteristics of confidence and value and self 757 00:41:27,880 --> 00:41:35,280 Speaker 2: esteem and patience and commitment and work ethic and problem 758 00:41:35,480 --> 00:41:41,919 Speaker 2: solving and compassion that you could then take these qualities 759 00:41:42,080 --> 00:41:45,240 Speaker 2: and characteristic traits of a person and go live. 760 00:41:45,080 --> 00:41:45,800 Speaker 5: A good life. 761 00:41:46,480 --> 00:41:49,440 Speaker 2: Like that's what I felt like my job was as 762 00:41:49,480 --> 00:41:53,120 Speaker 2: a mother not to know everything about you. 763 00:41:53,640 --> 00:41:54,920 Speaker 4: I think that's really beautiful. 764 00:41:54,920 --> 00:41:57,799 Speaker 3: And I also think, I mean, obviously I'm not a parent, 765 00:41:57,840 --> 00:41:59,400 Speaker 3: but when I think about the type of parent I 766 00:41:59,440 --> 00:42:02,560 Speaker 3: want to be one day, it's not the parent who 767 00:42:03,040 --> 00:42:06,680 Speaker 3: knows everything about my kid. It's the parent who creates 768 00:42:06,840 --> 00:42:11,000 Speaker 3: a relationship and a home environment that makes my kid 769 00:42:11,320 --> 00:42:16,520 Speaker 3: feel safe sharing anything with me about themselves. Because I 770 00:42:16,560 --> 00:42:18,400 Speaker 3: agree with you, mom, I do think it is a 771 00:42:18,560 --> 00:42:22,799 Speaker 3: very egotistical stance to take of like, well, I made you, 772 00:42:22,920 --> 00:42:25,200 Speaker 3: and so I should know everything about you. You know, 773 00:42:25,440 --> 00:42:30,000 Speaker 3: our children are their own individuals in and of themselves, 774 00:42:30,080 --> 00:42:34,520 Speaker 3: with their own beliefs and agendas and things that they 775 00:42:34,560 --> 00:42:36,920 Speaker 3: will experience and observe about the world. And it's like, 776 00:42:37,320 --> 00:42:39,880 Speaker 3: who are you to assume that just because you're their parent, 777 00:42:40,120 --> 00:42:43,160 Speaker 3: you're entitled to immediately know all of that. And I 778 00:42:43,160 --> 00:42:47,279 Speaker 3: think the place that maybe Bree could have focused more 779 00:42:47,320 --> 00:42:51,560 Speaker 3: attention would be creating an environment that made Andrew feel 780 00:42:52,000 --> 00:42:54,600 Speaker 3: inspired to share these parts of himself with her. 781 00:42:54,960 --> 00:42:58,720 Speaker 2: And you know what causes that is listening, Like people 782 00:42:58,840 --> 00:43:01,120 Speaker 2: need to listen, you know, parents. 783 00:43:00,880 --> 00:43:01,800 Speaker 4: Children will listen. 784 00:43:02,000 --> 00:43:05,040 Speaker 1: I was going to say, wow, it is the perfect 785 00:43:05,040 --> 00:43:09,759 Speaker 1: title for this episode. I mean really and yeah, I 786 00:43:09,800 --> 00:43:13,120 Speaker 1: think that those are The scene at that poker table 787 00:43:13,200 --> 00:43:16,520 Speaker 1: where with Lynette and Breed kind of accusing each other 788 00:43:16,520 --> 00:43:18,760 Speaker 1: of being bad mothers was a rough one to watch, 789 00:43:19,200 --> 00:43:24,440 Speaker 1: but where it led was really beautiful and you know, 790 00:43:24,680 --> 00:43:27,600 Speaker 1: allowed us to kind of ruminate on what does make 791 00:43:27,640 --> 00:43:30,480 Speaker 1: a good parent? What are the lessons that we hope 792 00:43:31,120 --> 00:43:34,400 Speaker 1: we can, you know, pass on to our children about parenting. 793 00:43:34,560 --> 00:43:36,920 Speaker 1: And I'm just so I'm so lucky that I get 794 00:43:36,960 --> 00:43:39,120 Speaker 1: such a front row seat to your guys as dynamic 795 00:43:39,120 --> 00:43:41,480 Speaker 1: as a mother and daughter. It's such a beautiful spot 796 00:43:41,480 --> 00:43:43,160 Speaker 1: for me to be at this chapter of my life. 797 00:43:43,200 --> 00:43:45,719 Speaker 1: So thanks for being so open and sharing all of 798 00:43:45,760 --> 00:43:46,240 Speaker 1: those things. 799 00:43:46,520 --> 00:43:49,440 Speaker 3: I'm so lucky that we get this environment where we 800 00:43:49,520 --> 00:43:52,360 Speaker 3: get to share and listen and create a safe space 801 00:43:52,400 --> 00:43:55,160 Speaker 3: with each other. And I'm so grateful to our listeners 802 00:43:55,440 --> 00:43:57,120 Speaker 3: who are tuning in each week to. 803 00:43:57,160 --> 00:43:59,920 Speaker 4: Listen to us, and I hope. 804 00:43:59,680 --> 00:44:03,960 Speaker 3: That you all feel continually inspired to share your thoughts 805 00:44:03,960 --> 00:44:06,160 Speaker 3: with us too, because we're really here to listen to 806 00:44:06,160 --> 00:44:06,879 Speaker 3: what you have to say. 807 00:44:07,480 --> 00:44:10,840 Speaker 2: Yeah, thank you for joining us once again, and we'll 808 00:44:10,880 --> 00:44:12,280 Speaker 2: see you next week because 809 00:44:13,040 --> 00:44:17,360 Speaker 1: We are desperately devoted to you, so desperate, desperate, desperate 810 00:44:17,560 --> 00:44:18,320 Speaker 1: and devoted