Speaker 1: Wanting everybody as J n V. Charlemagne to God, we
Speaker 1: ought to breakfast club.
Speaker 2: If you're just joining us with celebrating the twentieth anniversary
Speaker 2: of wilding Out.
Speaker 1: You could take your headphones off. Guys, you can take
Speaker 1: you headphones, take their headphones off. I'm sorry, I shouldn't
Speaker 1: tell you.
Speaker 3: That, something like we're like no head yeah, sorry, Yeah,
Speaker 3: that's our first day.
Speaker 2: But we're celebrating the twentieth anniversary of wilding Out and
Speaker 2: we have b some moaning Justina Valentine this morning.
Speaker 1: Yes, and we're asking eight hundred.
Speaker 2: Five eighty five five one? Can men show weakness? Can
Speaker 2: they show vulnerability? Can they be open and free with
Speaker 2: their feelings without looking like a suck up some time?
Speaker 3: M cand But is it worth it?
Speaker 4: It's probably not.
Speaker 3: It is worth it if you do it the right way.
Speaker 3: Talk to us.
Speaker 5: You can't do it. First of all, the Internet is
Speaker 5: never going to be a place where hundreds and thousands
Speaker 5: of people aren't going to attack somebody and have opinions.
Speaker 6: That's right.
Speaker 5: So at the end of the day, if I'm putting
Speaker 5: something on the Internet, I have to know that that's
Speaker 5: going to happen.
Speaker 4: Yeah, and you have to be fine with you. But
Speaker 4: I know one thing for sure, And do you think
Speaker 4: for certain my man better let me bust it open
Speaker 4: our break or whomever like he better not say nothing
Speaker 4: about forget.
Speaker 7: I mean, why do you why do y'all think a
Speaker 7: man should just be okay with that?
Speaker 3: I love you, You're my woman.
Speaker 7: If I've committed to you in that way, like say,
Speaker 7: like they were married, you know, we got children together.
Speaker 7: Why can't my feelings be hurt if I see you
Speaker 7: busting it open on anybody?
Speaker 4: I think it can be if she's not like in
Speaker 4: the entertainment space. But again, Kiki is an entertainer. She
Speaker 4: had eyes on her. This is why Usher picked her
Speaker 4: out of the crowd to dance with her, because she
Speaker 4: is who she is. So that's why I think she
Speaker 4: gets a free passage.
Speaker 1: She has a baby relationship, She didn't bang them.
Speaker 7: She just like what y'all do, That it's all entertainment
Speaker 7: thing is not a valid excuse.
Speaker 1: And guess what well then I need in.
Speaker 7: This industry, we used to take our we were told
Speaker 7: not to wear all wedding rings and then act like
Speaker 7: we weren't married back in the day, back and the yeah,
Speaker 7: don't you think that wouldn't hurt wife's feelings.
Speaker 5: Partner, if you really what's upset about that, That's something
Speaker 5: you should know about your partner before you get in
Speaker 5: front of usher.
Speaker 3: That's true, But I want.
Speaker 7: To take it out of the US and Kiki thing.
Speaker 7: I just want to say, man, we got so many
Speaker 7: men in therapy, so many men doing the work. But
Speaker 7: men always get so much flak for not expressing their emotions,
Speaker 7: not expressing their feelings. But when they do, they get
Speaker 7: called him to kill suckers and punks, and you know
Speaker 7: that he's not on her level. He's jealous of her successful.
Speaker 7: How about some men are just in love and trying
Speaker 7: to figure it.
Speaker 1: Out, they be jealous so too.
Speaker 4: Especially like No, I'm just saying like it could it
Speaker 4: could be, and it.
Speaker 1: Could be a little bit of both.
Speaker 4: It could be a little bit of jealousness and a
Speaker 4: little bit because you love.
Speaker 5: It, being a little jealous of me.
Speaker 3: Yeah, my feelings because you're buzzing it open on somebody else. See.
Speaker 2: But the thing is, if you guys had men and
Speaker 2: you broke up with your man and you put on
Speaker 2: Instagram or social media, I broke up with my man.
Speaker 2: I'm not feeling good, it's not right. Y'all wouldn't get
Speaker 2: hateful comments. You would get a lot of people support.
Speaker 4: It's gonna be okay.
Speaker 1: Now if me and Charlamagne put on there. I just
Speaker 1: broke up with my man.
Speaker 3: Man, and we know if double standards for everything.
Speaker 7: But when women express their emotions and feelings, we're told
Speaker 7: we should listen, regardless of where they expressed them.
Speaker 3: But when men do.
Speaker 7: It, we suckers and we secure that's not right, man,
Speaker 7: and y'all gonna make it the way. Men aren' gonna
Speaker 7: want to ePRESS their emotions publicly, and that's dangerous because
Speaker 7: men expressing themselves publicly is how other.
Speaker 3: Men will learn how to publicly express their emotions.
Speaker 2: We even look at look my situation in my book.
Speaker 2: I wrote a book about me and my wife's relationship.
Speaker 2: We've been together twenty nine years, thirty years, and I
Speaker 2: talked about and early on I couldn't make an orgasm.
Speaker 3: I didn't know.
Speaker 2: We were sixteen and fifteen. There were memes they made
Speaker 2: fun of me, but it was me expressing how I was. Now,
Speaker 2: if I was a very sensitive person, which I am,
Speaker 2: I would be like when I write the next one,
Speaker 2: I'm like, I ain't putting no one else out there
Speaker 2: because me trying to express myself open the door. Because
Speaker 2: there was so many men that showed the same way
Speaker 2: and it went through the same thing, but they were
Speaker 2: scared to say.
Speaker 7: That what he's trying to get sympathy right now. Nobody
Speaker 7: shamed him because he expressed it, you know, his emotions
Speaker 7: shamed because he ain't know how to work the middle.
Speaker 7: That's why it's a lot of guys for years what
Speaker 7: we were shaming you for.
Speaker 1: But if you don't know, you can't fix it. You
Speaker 1: didn't know right exactly.
Speaker 2: It was sixteen when when I was she was at
Speaker 2: least taking it, she was at least facings.
Speaker 1: Guess how it came out. It was sixteen. But I
Speaker 1: used to watch porn, so I thought sex was bang
Speaker 1: bang bang bang bang. Sure, but you had to learn.
Speaker 1: It was nobody to tell me or teach me.
Speaker 2: So yes, I did it so people could learn and
Speaker 2: have those conversations.
Speaker 7: Everybody read that book was like, I've been making women orgas. Okay,
Speaker 7: you the one that ain't your making fun of me.
Speaker 5: This year, so you ain't the only one that ain't
Speaker 5: doing nothing in the bedroom I'm thirty three and had
Speaker 5: my first organs.
Speaker 7: Yeah, that's that's crazy, Like you weren't having sex with
Speaker 7: one person for ten years?
Speaker 3: Yeah, you know what I Yeah, she was.
Speaker 1: Having an orgasm with my mouth, not with my penis.
Speaker 1: That's the thing I was.
Speaker 4: Gonna say, she really love you though, because she's still
Speaker 4: by your side with no orgasms from sex and wanted
Speaker 4: to make you feel good like she was so she
Speaker 4: you know, but that's really.
Speaker 1: No, It's like she's she's a real right to speak up.
Speaker 5: It's not the main its fault if you don't know,
Speaker 5: if you ain't telling them nothing to me, telling.
Speaker 3: This lie about how he was making her do it
Speaker 3: with his mouth?
Speaker 1: Did she was on you? Bro says And the first
Speaker 1: thing I am not cling.
Speaker 7: I love the fact that you expressed your fieling have
Speaker 7: nothing to do with woman all gathered years. That's what
Speaker 7: we're talking about. We're not talking about you expressing your
Speaker 7: feeling No, I'm not expressing not one time I said
Speaker 7: you wrong for expressing your feelings wrong, but not making
Speaker 7: the difference.
Speaker 4: The first time she actually really orgasm was She's like,
Speaker 4: oh my gosh, babe, I've been lying for a decade
Speaker 4: like did she bug out?
Speaker 5: Like?
Speaker 1: What was that?
Speaker 3: Like? Right?
Speaker 1: It's in the book. Let me read the books. Period.
Speaker 7: All of the moral of the story is we got
Speaker 7: to stop shaming men for expressing themselves. The middle of
Speaker 7: the we made so much toxic behavior public. We have
Speaker 7: to make the positive healing behavior public too. And y'all
Speaker 7: gonna make it the way Minfield like it's not worthing
Speaker 7: to express himself because of how y'all react to.
Speaker 1: And I guess what more men step up?
Speaker 5: Like there should be more men on the internet really
Speaker 5: supporting this brother in this time. If that's what y'all believe.
Speaker 7: I do.
Speaker 3: We don't need did we get we get shamed for
Speaker 3: that against she's a mom. I don't care what outing
Speaker 3: she was me.
Speaker 7: Yeah, I don't care about any of that. I care
Speaker 7: about man. This man, if his feelings are hurt, he
Speaker 7: should be able to.
Speaker 1: Express gentleman, lady, what's up, brother? What's your thoughts? Man?
Speaker 6: That's just how this world is.
Speaker 3: Man.
Speaker 6: They expect a man to shut up, be quiet, produce,
Speaker 6: don't have no feelings, don't show no hurt. I work
Speaker 6: in the criminal courts. Right now, there's the case a
Speaker 6: brother was losing custody of his child and let's just
Speaker 6: stay right now. You gotta do eighteen years in prisony
Speaker 6: because nobody would listen to him. Nobody expects, oh, why
Speaker 6: is a man you want to see your child so much?
Speaker 3: But he ended up calling doing violence to the young lady.
Speaker 6: Exactly so Avenue. He was calling his friend every night crying. Ye,
Speaker 6: nobody else would listen to him. This man was in
Speaker 6: a lot of thames. He just wants you to shut up.
Speaker 6: Imagine seeing your woman on stage dressed like that.
Speaker 3: I don't care about that.
Speaker 6: Something inappropriate. What's the man supposed to do? React after
Speaker 6: he told it to come out dress like that?
Speaker 2: He told me, I don't know, but this is what
Speaker 2: I do.
Speaker 4: This is also Keky Palmer, very famous, very talented entertainer.
Speaker 4: She's not just you know, someone who went out that
Speaker 4: night to go like get a freaking with guys like
Speaker 4: she is who she is. I think we're forgetting that point.
Speaker 3: That's a very for forgetting. Oh that's why.
Speaker 7: That's what he was expressing in that interview when he
Speaker 7: was saying how he always fucked. He had the need
Speaker 7: to be perfect because she's Keky Palmer, and he felt
Speaker 7: that she would always be perfect because she's so.
Speaker 1: Let me ask you a question.
Speaker 4: All the allowances that men are afforded, who are famous,
Speaker 4: who are are females not afforded.
Speaker 1: Those the same allowances?
Speaker 4: Because men that have, you know, a long list of
Speaker 4: options and are famous, I feel like they get away
Speaker 4: with a lot more than just a normal do relationship.
Speaker 1: They should. I don't think they should.
Speaker 2: See the problem was was I don't necessarily think the
Speaker 2: problem was what happened.
Speaker 1: I think it was this the phone, right, you think
Speaker 1: about it.
Speaker 2: Men go to a strip club, they get lap dances,
Speaker 2: nobody knows, nobody sees. But now imagine your men and
Speaker 2: there's a video of your man getting a crazy lap
Speaker 2: dance and.
Speaker 1: You feel the trails.
Speaker 4: Yes, yeah, when that fudge leaves a little line, you be.
Speaker 3: Mad because you've been publicly embarrassed.
Speaker 1: Correct.
Speaker 5: Yes, So it's really not about it's really you don't
Speaker 5: want people to know, because it's really you want to
Speaker 5: do everything behind closed doors and you don't want the
Speaker 5: internet to know.
Speaker 3: I don't think.
Speaker 7: I just think you shouldn't publicly embarrass your significant other.
Speaker 7: I think that grow publicly.
Speaker 5: But why is it not embarrassing if it's about behind
Speaker 5: closed doors. But it's only embarrassing and people see it
Speaker 5: if it's truly who you are.
Speaker 3: I think it's what do you mean when you say
Speaker 3: behind closed.
Speaker 5: Like you said, if there's no cameras out and you
Speaker 5: could do it.
Speaker 3: Oh, but then y'all two can have a conversation working.
Speaker 1: It is easy to work.
Speaker 2: And it's like if you and your man getting an
Speaker 2: argument at home, it's different. But now if you're in public,
Speaker 2: it's a lot different because now people don't know what
Speaker 2: you're arguing about is pressing.
Speaker 1: Now you might feel a certain way.
Speaker 2: Things that you might have forgave him for at home,
Speaker 2: you might not forgive him for if it's in the public.
Speaker 3: And that's what the young man was wrong for.
Speaker 7: The young man was wrong for. She was wrong for
Speaker 7: publicly embarrassing him with us. He was wrong for publicly
Speaker 7: ambassing Arou on social media. They could have just had
Speaker 7: a conversation about could show at home and nobody would
Speaker 7: have been the.
Speaker 2: One's the sex and more calls eight hundred and five
Speaker 2: eight five one oh five to one Colin let us
Speaker 2: know what you think.
Speaker 3: It's the breakfast l in the morning express their feelings.
Speaker 1: Everybody's DJ Envy, Charlamagne the God. We are the Breakfast Club.
Speaker 2: You know, it's the twentieth anniversary or the twentieth season
Speaker 2: of wild'n Out, and we have Justina Valentine and b
Speaker 2: Simoni Bizard And if you're just joining us, we're talking
Speaker 2: about men being able to express their feelings. Is it
Speaker 2: why when a man exp is this feeling, he's a sucker,
Speaker 2: he's he's he's a whim. But when women do it this,
Speaker 2: they get so much support. And I know you're about
Speaker 2: to see something. He was about to say something justin.
Speaker 1: I was gonna say, did I not see the full clip?
Speaker 4: Because the clip I saw was not that crazy, That's
Speaker 4: what I'm saying. Like if she had been bent over
Speaker 4: and usher was pulling her hair and just like you know,
Speaker 4: slamming her, I'll be like, Okay, it was a little crazy,
Speaker 4: but the clip I saw was not crazy at all.
Speaker 2: Say this though, like, as a man, what you just
Speaker 2: said is probably what he saw in his mind.
Speaker 8: Right, that's what.
Speaker 2: Your wife, your girl, your baby mother, that's what you've seen.
Speaker 2: You didn't just see little dance you see.
Speaker 1: That's what you said.
Speaker 7: By the way, what's wrong with being insecure and what's
Speaker 7: wrong with me expressing that.
Speaker 3: I'm insecure now?
Speaker 7: Because the insecurity is going to express whether I stay
Speaker 7: on just tell my my behavior, you're gonna tell about
Speaker 7: certain language. All I'm saying is you gotta let men
Speaker 7: be able to express these emotions because if you don't,
Speaker 7: they're gonna keep them pent up inside. And we've all
Speaker 7: seen what with what that leads to that do nothing
Speaker 7: but toxic masculine.
Speaker 5: My thing is express it. But then what is the solution? Like,
Speaker 5: if I'm insecure, we need to figure out how to get.
Speaker 3: Work on that. If I'm judge with each other?
Speaker 5: Right, But I think people just want to vent and
Speaker 5: express and then let's get to the root of it
Speaker 5: though we have to heal it and fix it.
Speaker 2: But the whole thing is in a lot of relationships
Speaker 2: people they argue to win, right, and not argue to
Speaker 2: be on the same side, Like there's no winner.
Speaker 1: If you win, I lose.
Speaker 3: It.
Speaker 1: Shouldn't be a winner or lose it, she'd be Let's
Speaker 1: resolve the.
Speaker 3: Situation and move on, simple as that.
Speaker 1: Well, we have Charlena on the phone. Are you named
Speaker 1: after Charlemagne?
Speaker 3: No?
Speaker 1: God, No, I'm just joking. I'm just joking, charlmona, what's
Speaker 1: your what'd you think? What's your thoughts?
Speaker 9: Okay, Well, I feel like her baby father was very
Speaker 9: insecure about the whole scenario. I mean, if anything, you
Speaker 9: should have been uplifted her and proud of his woman
Speaker 9: because carry herself. She's healthy, she's living, she had the baby.
Speaker 3: We missed.
Speaker 7: We missing the whole point of the conversation. The whole
Speaker 7: point of the conversation is should men be able to
Speaker 7: express their feelings publicly without being shamed?
Speaker 9: Express insecurity, that is his feelings.
Speaker 3: My god't even consider feelings anymore. That men can't be insecure.
Speaker 3: We don't. We can't reserve the right to be insecure.
Speaker 4: You know what, You can be insecure, but not at
Speaker 4: the expense of putting your woman down. So if he
Speaker 4: would have just said, my woman dancing with us or
Speaker 4: made me very insecure because of you know, legendary.
Speaker 3: But he was of the part on the internet.
Speaker 4: And like, and if she's really not cheating on him
Speaker 4: at all, which I don't think she is, it's like
Speaker 4: you also have to give her that grace, like, you
Speaker 4: know what, life she's living, she's coming home to you
Speaker 4: and she just.
Speaker 3: Had a baby.
Speaker 1: Looks damn good.
Speaker 3: Like what you hear, what y'all just said.
Speaker 7: And that's what I keep trying to trying to stress
Speaker 7: that is the conversation that should have been had. We
Speaker 7: know it was misplaced aggression. I know he didn't care
Speaker 7: about the mom thing in the outfit. We know his
Speaker 7: feelings was hurt. Why not teach that brother how to
Speaker 7: properly express his emotions.
Speaker 5: That's what I'm saying. The solution therapy, somebody a professional
Speaker 5: to talk to this that like, if you go to
Speaker 5: relationship counseling, y'all need to sit down whatever you know,
Speaker 5: but get to the solution.
Speaker 1: Don't just keep arguing tj yo.
Speaker 3: What's up? Brother?
Speaker 1: What's your thoughts?
Speaker 3: Man? Man?
Speaker 6: So my thought is to be able to express how
Speaker 6: you feel.
Speaker 8: I mean, you know, we say, you know mental health
Speaker 8: is awareness, but you can't even say if you don't
Speaker 8: like something straight up un you you're keeping all that
Speaker 8: fighted up as a man that you lash out on
Speaker 8: your kids, if you las shout on your wife, how
Speaker 8: that works? Like it just ain't healthy. Like I'm waiting
Speaker 8: a young time right now. He turned five minutes. One
Speaker 8: thing I'm always.
Speaker 6: Telling to hey, use your boy, if you if you don't.
Speaker 7: Like something saying that's right, because the reality is we're
Speaker 7: going to get there, meaning that if you use your
Speaker 7: even if you don't say what you really mean, work
Speaker 7: like you said, I want to get to the root.
Speaker 3: We're trying to do, get to the root to heal
Speaker 3: the problem.
Speaker 1: All right, Well, we got a moral of the story.
Speaker 3: Moral of the stories.
Speaker 7: Men should be able to express their emotions and feelings
Speaker 7: without being shamedful, simple as that.
Speaker 1: And women should be able to hold up.
Speaker 4: As long as there not really like a whole, as
Speaker 4: long as it's just innocent hoeing.
Speaker 1: It's a difference.
Speaker 4: First, if you're a relationship, it was innocent, it wasn't.
Speaker 5: You know.
Speaker 7: That's the kind of crazy thuff Man used to say
Speaker 7: today women, for you, it was just innocent hoing.
Speaker 9: I mean I was.
Speaker 1: I was gonna get right back, all right. Twenty twenty three,
Speaker 1: when we come back, we got your room report. We
Speaker 1: got to talk about Tiffany Hattish.
Speaker 2: If you're trying to shoot your shot at celebrities, well
Speaker 2: she's gonna give you some tips on how to do
Speaker 2: so we'll get to it.
Speaker 1: Nexus to the breakfast club, be eating