WEBVTT - Ep46: Busting a Load in Heels and a Hoe Coach Feat Imani 0:00:00.240 --> 0:00:02.240 If you're like me, your snaps in your Instagram are 0:00:02.240 --> 0:00:05.000 constantly flooded with people posting pictures from their travels. So 0:00:05.240 --> 0:00:07.320 if you're someone that loves travel or s files to 0:00:07.320 --> 0:00:09.760 see the world just like them, you should definitely listen 0:00:09.800 --> 0:00:12.520 to The Travel Guides. It's a podcast dedicated to making 0:00:12.520 --> 0:00:15.440 travel easy for everyday people like you and I. Hosted 0:00:15.440 --> 0:00:17.840 by two brothers with a passion for the getaway, The 0:00:17.840 --> 0:00:20.960 Travel Guides rids you of travel anxiety, gives you tips 0:00:20.960 --> 0:00:23.239 on how to travel on a budget, maximize your time, 0:00:23.600 --> 0:00:26.400 and things like that. Each episode highlights a unique travel 0:00:26.440 --> 0:00:29.320 experience from a young adult of color predominantly who is 0:00:29.360 --> 0:00:31.520 globe trotting the hell out of their twenties and thirties. 0:00:32.120 --> 0:00:36.280 If you're interested, please visit SoundCloud, Apple, wherever you listen 0:00:36.320 --> 0:00:40.120 to podcast. It's spelled The Travel Guides g U y 0:00:40.440 --> 0:00:43.120 d e s. Wherever you listen to your podcast, tell 0:00:43.159 --> 0:00:45.040 a friend, leave a review if you enjoy it, and 0:00:45.080 --> 0:00:51.760 remember your next adventure as a click away. So right, 0:00:51.800 --> 0:00:53.840 it's not here time we've agreed on a song in 0:00:53.840 --> 0:00:56.680 a long time? Actually, is it? We picked some ratchet shot? 0:00:56.680 --> 0:00:58.280 You pick some ship. I don't know, and I picked 0:00:58.320 --> 0:01:00.640 some ship. You don't know. Oh, I kind of thought 0:01:00.640 --> 0:01:03.440 it was gonna get you want to see how let's 0:01:03.760 --> 0:01:06.160 do the whole lyrics before they type out like damn, 0:01:06.240 --> 0:01:08.560 I heard us in a minute. All right ready, I 0:01:08.560 --> 0:01:18.840 don't want to be I love. Go ahead. So you 0:01:18.959 --> 0:01:21.960 thinking about a chance you find myself trying to do 0:01:22.080 --> 0:01:34.440 my dad? Maybe because you love it? Oh, we try, 0:01:35.040 --> 0:01:37.679 and that is why we just podcast. I wish you 0:01:37.680 --> 0:01:39.200 gonna Mike in a mouth and thank you know what 0:01:39.560 --> 0:01:44.240 I am? I Beyonce this so no bish, you're not 0:01:44.880 --> 0:01:54.120 You're a bank. I love his billion banks. When she 0:01:54.200 --> 0:01:58.480 wrote sand Nigger on D I felt uncomfortable just saying that. 0:01:58.560 --> 0:02:00.920 Just now. I can't believe she wrote that ship. And 0:02:00.960 --> 0:02:03.760 then it was like, oh, why y'all mad? Because he's 0:02:03.760 --> 0:02:07.960 one of us. That's why we're upset with you. Hi, guys, 0:02:08.040 --> 0:02:11.640 welcome to yet another episode of horrible decisions. I believe 0:02:11.680 --> 0:02:17.600 this is like number forty six number for Wenna have 0:02:17.960 --> 0:02:20.000 on here. I'm not sucking you, bro, You're just not 0:02:20.040 --> 0:02:22.120 my time, I said, we as in maybe one of 0:02:22.160 --> 0:02:25.160 us someone else. Go ahead, I'll leave that task up 0:02:25.160 --> 0:02:29.720 to you. Hi, guys, this is yet um Like I said, 0:02:29.720 --> 0:02:32.160 another episode. If you guys have not tuned into us before, 0:02:32.600 --> 0:02:34.200 this is the show where you can kind of listen 0:02:34.200 --> 0:02:37.840 to us talk about how shit. Um, we talk about kinks, 0:02:37.880 --> 0:02:39.760 we talk about things that may make me feel uncomfortable. 0:02:39.760 --> 0:02:42.080 And a lot of people about their kings were diusting 0:02:42.160 --> 0:02:45.800 to things and stuff and cigarettes ash out in mouths. 0:02:45.880 --> 0:02:48.560 But that wasn't this episode. No, but you guys can 0:02:48.560 --> 0:02:50.480 go back and tune into the last one. This is 0:02:50.520 --> 0:02:54.000 your girl, Mandy B. And I'm sitting next to Wheezy 0:02:54.120 --> 0:02:58.840 High and of course we are, you know. Well, not 0:02:58.840 --> 0:03:02.200 only that, all that just when we were sitting here 0:03:02.240 --> 0:03:04.680 with a guest in the studio this week, and I'm 0:03:04.720 --> 0:03:07.880 so excited. Um, hey girl, you ain't gotta be um 0:03:07.880 --> 0:03:09.840 soft spoken. You're gonna make us sound like like some 0:03:09.919 --> 0:03:11.680 loud mouth. You able to tell people how to be 0:03:11.720 --> 0:03:16.880 a home and maybe that's the way to go though. 0:03:17.320 --> 0:03:19.239 I just want to tell you guys, how we found 0:03:19.240 --> 0:03:23.840 our guest Emaney. So my friend dub as well as 0:03:23.840 --> 0:03:25.919 we got her on the show. She was episode taking seventeen. 0:03:25.960 --> 0:03:28.720 She was the unicorn and um, she hit me up 0:03:28.760 --> 0:03:30.880 a few weeks ago and was like, bitch, I have 0:03:30.960 --> 0:03:33.600 been talking to my whole coach. She's literally about there, 0:03:33.600 --> 0:03:35.160 but she's telling me how to get money from newsningers. 0:03:35.200 --> 0:03:37.200 I'm like what and so like I kind of thought 0:03:37.240 --> 0:03:38.320 it was a joke and then she was just like, 0:03:38.360 --> 0:03:41.320 you don't understand actually wanted I wrote a quote Dubson. 0:03:41.760 --> 0:03:44.800 She told me today she understands men way more than 0:03:44.840 --> 0:03:47.800 any other woman I've ever met in my life. And 0:03:47.840 --> 0:03:49.480 I was like, well, how do I find a bit? 0:03:51.400 --> 0:03:54.160 So we have a money today? Um, this episode is 0:03:54.200 --> 0:03:55.760 all about know when you're worth. I want her to 0:03:55.800 --> 0:03:58.640 kind of talk about what she instills in women confidence, um, 0:03:58.640 --> 0:04:00.160 the things that she does, and then I pretend really 0:04:00.160 --> 0:04:03.400 want to talk about confidence in relationship to the asease story. 0:04:03.600 --> 0:04:07.720 Um yeah, so um yeah. And another thing I spoke 0:04:07.800 --> 0:04:09.320 to dub as well, because I was just like, what 0:04:09.640 --> 0:04:11.240 is the whole code you're paying this girl? Like what's 0:04:11.240 --> 0:04:13.600 she doing for you? And she like had nothing but 0:04:13.680 --> 0:04:16.160 good words to say and was like, listen, she revamped 0:04:16.200 --> 0:04:18.120 my dating sites and you listened to the last episode 0:04:18.120 --> 0:04:21.720 we talked about online dating and she just had nothing 0:04:21.720 --> 0:04:23.360 but good words to say, so, which I'm hoping you 0:04:23.360 --> 0:04:28.599 could say something to let our listen good. Um, And 0:04:28.640 --> 0:04:30.960 so I guess how we wanted. Normally, what we do 0:04:31.120 --> 0:04:35.000 is we start off with an ice breaker. However, today 0:04:35.040 --> 0:04:36.919 we're not going to do a game because it's something 0:04:36.960 --> 0:04:40.280 that we kind of had some strong emotions about. And 0:04:40.320 --> 0:04:42.080 you said you've read the story as well. We want 0:04:42.080 --> 0:04:44.160 to kind of get into the season Sorry story. Now, 0:04:44.200 --> 0:04:47.640 by the time this episode drops, it'll probably be like 0:04:47.680 --> 0:04:49.720 two weeks old news, but hopefully it's given all of 0:04:49.760 --> 0:04:52.120 our listeners enough time to read the story and come 0:04:52.200 --> 0:04:54.000 up with their own opinion on it. I also want 0:04:54.000 --> 0:04:56.640 to read a segment of Lisa's opinion, which is very 0:04:56.680 --> 0:04:58.520 different from most of our from most of ours. So, 0:04:58.640 --> 0:05:02.359 Lisa Splitten was a former guest of ours. She was 0:05:02.440 --> 0:05:07.760 a Finn doom and radical as fuck um and and 0:05:07.839 --> 0:05:10.320 the one that I sounded off about. We're gonna We're 0:05:10.320 --> 0:05:13.120 actually gonna start with what Lisa said or are you 0:05:13.160 --> 0:05:15.080 going to start with her? Um? Let's talk and then 0:05:15.720 --> 0:05:17.760 I'm gonna I'm gonna try to give as much of 0:05:17.760 --> 0:05:20.159 a brief reefcap of this story as I can. So 0:05:20.640 --> 0:05:22.679 on a website that nobody's ever sucking heard of, baby 0:05:22.680 --> 0:05:24.680 baby dot com, a girl went on a date with 0:05:24.680 --> 0:05:27.719 his zis on Sorry Um. Basically, they met at the 0:05:27.760 --> 0:05:30.320 Golden Globes party. She's how twenty three years old. She's 0:05:30.320 --> 0:05:33.080 in Brooklyn. She lives in New York. Um. She took 0:05:33.080 --> 0:05:35.040 pictures with him at the party. He asked for a number. 0:05:35.040 --> 0:05:37.279 They went on a date. UM. She met at his apartment. 0:05:37.320 --> 0:05:39.240 First they had a glass of wine, then they went 0:05:39.680 --> 0:05:41.240 to dinner, and then she said she felt kind of 0:05:41.279 --> 0:05:43.080 rushed to leave the dinner and then went back to 0:05:43.120 --> 0:05:46.719 his place. Um. She talked about how UM, it started 0:05:46.760 --> 0:05:49.080 off with her complimenting his countertops and then he's like 0:05:49.080 --> 0:05:51.440 put her on it, and they started making out and 0:05:51.440 --> 0:05:55.080 it got really intense. Um. Apparently he undressed her and 0:05:55.080 --> 0:05:57.960 then himself. He gave her oral sex. She gave him 0:05:58.040 --> 0:06:01.680 oral sex. Um. She talks about a lot of not engaging, 0:06:01.720 --> 0:06:03.680 saying that she gave a lot of non verbal clues 0:06:04.080 --> 0:06:05.840 UM as to not wanting to have sex with him, 0:06:05.880 --> 0:06:07.720 which I think makes sense. She said there was at 0:06:07.720 --> 0:06:09.200 one point she didn't kill him back or even move 0:06:09.200 --> 0:06:11.279 her mouth. She talks about how he was stuffing his 0:06:11.360 --> 0:06:13.560 fingers in her throat in a V shape I guess, 0:06:13.600 --> 0:06:17.320 and them trying to put him in her pussy. UM, 0:06:17.360 --> 0:06:20.880 I guess. Basically feeling forced. Um. By the time he 0:06:20.920 --> 0:06:23.080 tried to put a condom on, I'm still scrolling through it. 0:06:23.520 --> 0:06:26.240 She then basically said no, something about like, let's do 0:06:26.279 --> 0:06:28.040 this on our second day. I don't think she said no, 0:06:28.520 --> 0:06:32.080 excuse me, was like, maybe we should do this on 0:06:32.080 --> 0:06:33.479 her second day, and he said, how about haw it 0:06:33.600 --> 0:06:36.719 right now? And we wanted to for another another glass 0:06:36.720 --> 0:06:39.240 of wine, and said, well does this make a second day? Um? 0:06:39.440 --> 0:06:41.080 I am trying to figure out how she got to 0:06:41.120 --> 0:06:42.840 the bathroom because that part is very important. So they 0:06:42.839 --> 0:06:48.520 were still on the on the countertop and he moved 0:06:48.560 --> 0:06:51.000 to the bedroom. He asked her where she wanted him 0:06:51.040 --> 0:06:54.640 to fuck her? Oh, and she was still seen it 0:06:54.680 --> 0:06:56.560 on the countertop. She says she found the question tough 0:06:56.560 --> 0:06:58.240 to answer because she didn't want to suck him at all. 0:06:58.640 --> 0:07:00.520 I wasn't since she says, this isn't court taition marks, 0:07:00.520 --> 0:07:02.120 I wasn't really even thinking of that. I didn't want 0:07:02.160 --> 0:07:04.080 to be engaged with that with him, but he kept asking, 0:07:04.400 --> 0:07:05.800 so I said next time, and he goes, oh, you 0:07:05.800 --> 0:07:08.359 mean a second day. Um. He then poured me a 0:07:08.360 --> 0:07:10.480 glass of handed to me as the second day, and 0:07:10.840 --> 0:07:13.560 she excused herself to hand it to go to the bathroom. 0:07:14.000 --> 0:07:15.880 She spent five minutes in the bathroom, collecting herself in 0:07:15.880 --> 0:07:17.760 the mirror, splashing herself with worle went back to him. 0:07:17.760 --> 0:07:19.640 He asked if she was okay, and she said, I 0:07:19.640 --> 0:07:21.360 don't want to feel forced, because then I'll hate you, 0:07:21.440 --> 0:07:23.960 and i'd rather not hate you. He said, oh, of course, 0:07:23.960 --> 0:07:26.800 it's only fun if we're both having fun. Then he said, 0:07:26.840 --> 0:07:28.600 let's chill on the couch. By the time they chilled 0:07:28.600 --> 0:07:32.080 on the couch, her remark about not wanting to feel 0:07:32.120 --> 0:07:34.240 forest had added a verbal component to the cues she 0:07:34.280 --> 0:07:36.600 was trying to give him nonverbally. When she sat down, 0:07:37.360 --> 0:07:39.120 um she thought he might rub her back or play 0:07:39.160 --> 0:07:41.480 with her hair, and said he instructed her to turn around. 0:07:41.480 --> 0:07:44.040 He sat back and pointed his penis, pointed to his 0:07:44.040 --> 0:07:45.720 penis emotion for me to go down on him, and 0:07:45.720 --> 0:07:48.160 I did. I think. I just felt really pressured. It 0:07:48.200 --> 0:07:50.240 was the most unexpected thing I thought would happen, because 0:07:50.240 --> 0:07:52.240 at that moment I had already told him I was uncomfortable. 0:07:52.720 --> 0:07:54.400 All right, you ain't gonna read the whole guy. Damn 0:07:54.480 --> 0:07:56.480 no, no no, Let me skip back to her when it stopped, 0:07:57.040 --> 0:08:00.200 because I'm just like people don't read it by now. No, 0:08:00.240 --> 0:08:01.680 I don't think a lot of people have a lot 0:08:01.760 --> 0:08:04.480 of people are just judging cliff notes after and this 0:08:04.520 --> 0:08:09.840 part is important. Halfway into the encounter, um he led 0:08:09.840 --> 0:08:11.480 her to the couch to a different part of the apartment. 0:08:11.520 --> 0:08:12.880 He said he had to show her something. He went 0:08:12.880 --> 0:08:15.000 in front of a large mirror, bent her over again 0:08:15.280 --> 0:08:16.600 and said, where do you want me to fuck you? 0:08:16.840 --> 0:08:19.400 Rammed his penis against her ass while he said it. 0:08:20.240 --> 0:08:22.160 She said, I remember looking in the mirror because his 0:08:22.200 --> 0:08:24.120 mirror seeing him behind me very much caught up in 0:08:24.160 --> 0:08:27.240 the moment, I was not, and finally I stood up. 0:08:27.280 --> 0:08:29.320 I said, no, I don't think I'm ready to do this. 0:08:29.480 --> 0:08:31.640 I really don't think I'm going to do this, And 0:08:31.680 --> 0:08:33.719 he said, how about we just chill with our clothes on. 0:08:34.520 --> 0:08:37.240 That's when they stopped. They got dressed, quote unquote, chilled 0:08:37.240 --> 0:08:40.720 on the couch, but basically he kissed her. She was uncomfortable. 0:08:40.920 --> 0:08:42.720 He called her an uber. Yeah, they sat and watched 0:08:42.760 --> 0:08:47.040 fucking Seinfield. So we wanted to bring this up because 0:08:47.040 --> 0:08:50.559 me and um Wheezy had a conversation off air, and please, 0:08:50.840 --> 0:08:53.559 we're gonna love to hear your input on this as well. 0:08:53.800 --> 0:08:56.280 And so when me and Weezy first had this conversation, 0:08:56.880 --> 0:08:59.839 she's like, well, I get where she's coming from, but 0:09:00.080 --> 0:09:02.640 I still think, you know, there was a way she 0:09:02.679 --> 0:09:05.520 could have said something. And my response was, which I 0:09:05.559 --> 0:09:07.280 don't think she should have went to the apartment. And 0:09:07.320 --> 0:09:11.079 this is where we disagreed, because yeah, this is this 0:09:11.120 --> 0:09:13.439 is where we definitely want to man input in this. 0:09:13.880 --> 0:09:17.319 So our disagreement I felt like to me as a 0:09:17.360 --> 0:09:20.200 grown as adult, I don't I don't invite men over 0:09:21.040 --> 0:09:23.160 just to chill, especially we're not going in the bedroom. 0:09:23.320 --> 0:09:24.840 If I don't feel like I'm in the mood to 0:09:24.880 --> 0:09:28.040 have sex, I mostly won't have a man over because 0:09:28.040 --> 0:09:29.960 a lot of time, wait, let me feel it, because 0:09:29.960 --> 0:09:32.920 a lot of times it's kind of implied you're coming over, 0:09:33.000 --> 0:09:35.440 especially depending the time of night that it is. You 0:09:35.440 --> 0:09:37.600 don't have to know if you're gonna have sex with someone. 0:09:37.720 --> 0:09:39.600 You don't have to know, because sometimes the vibe can 0:09:39.600 --> 0:09:41.079 be good. And I like that she has the right 0:09:41.080 --> 0:09:43.520 to change her mind if I completely know that I 0:09:43.559 --> 0:09:45.240 don't want to have sex with you tonight, which she 0:09:45.320 --> 0:09:47.079 made it very clear she knew she didn't want to 0:09:47.080 --> 0:09:50.040 have sex with him. Maybe the second date. I feel like, 0:09:50.040 --> 0:09:51.440 when did she make it? How does she when did 0:09:51.440 --> 0:09:53.080 she know? She said? I mean she said she said 0:09:53.080 --> 0:09:55.320 it once he started doing that, we don't know so 0:09:55.400 --> 0:09:58.680 to me, so I want to ask you, if you're 0:09:58.720 --> 0:10:01.360 on a date, you asked for a nightcap. To me, 0:10:01.400 --> 0:10:03.200 a nightcap means well, he didn't ask for that. Wait, wait, 0:10:03.240 --> 0:10:04.960 let's okay, well not a night He didn't use those words, 0:10:05.000 --> 0:10:06.880 but just saying come back to my place, let's chill. 0:10:07.080 --> 0:10:09.280 What does that mean from a man? Are you trying 0:10:09.280 --> 0:10:12.080 to thank you? But do you think that if a 0:10:12.120 --> 0:10:14.800 girl comes over that instant? Do you think it always 0:10:14.840 --> 0:10:16.360 has to mean that? Have you never like? Do you 0:10:16.400 --> 0:10:19.560 think it? So? I feel it's implied if you said 0:10:19.640 --> 0:10:24.760 if you say you want to come back to my place, yes, 0:10:24.880 --> 0:10:26.760 and went out to dinner so that they can be 0:10:26.800 --> 0:10:29.480 over at dinner, I'm gonna be really agree with you. 0:10:30.080 --> 0:10:31.640 Lover boy, who was the only person I've been sucking 0:10:31.640 --> 0:10:33.920 since we started the show. You keep saying it that's 0:10:33.920 --> 0:10:38.280 not true, But is it not? Because she didn't say 0:10:38.320 --> 0:10:40.520 that a couple of times. It's the first five episodes 0:10:40.559 --> 0:10:43.160 you had five different people and then you met Loverboy. 0:10:43.320 --> 0:10:48.240 I did you know. I mean it sounds good though, Okay, no, no, no, 0:10:48.280 --> 0:10:54.000 I kind of forgotten about him, Okay, okay, my first 0:10:54.080 --> 0:10:56.480 date with him went so great. My second day, sorry, 0:10:56.640 --> 0:10:59.360 and we were making out. It's like three am. I 0:10:59.440 --> 0:11:00.880 was drunk. I didn't really want to go back to 0:11:00.880 --> 0:11:02.439 my place. I still wanted to have fun and smoke. 0:11:02.880 --> 0:11:05.600 And I said to him outside his apartment, like, you 0:11:05.640 --> 0:11:07.440 know what, I think I should leave because I just 0:11:07.480 --> 0:11:10.280 I'm really not ready, and he's like, honestly, I really 0:11:10.280 --> 0:11:11.800 want to kick it with you right now. You can 0:11:11.800 --> 0:11:13.199 go if you want to, but like, I want to 0:11:13.240 --> 0:11:15.199 keep hanging with you. And we made out and we 0:11:15.320 --> 0:11:17.120 like kind of touched a little bit, but we didn't 0:11:17.160 --> 0:11:19.560 have sex, and I wasn't pressured to have sex. And 0:11:19.600 --> 0:11:22.040 I feel like you can still hang with someone after 0:11:22.080 --> 0:11:23.400 a date if you want to. I don't want to 0:11:23.440 --> 0:11:25.280 keep sitting in a bar with you. Bro, Like, did 0:11:25.280 --> 0:11:27.920 he try to have sex with you? No? He did not. 0:11:27.960 --> 0:11:29.840 I said it when before I got upstairs. Let's see, 0:11:29.840 --> 0:11:32.160 before you got upstairs, that's maybe. Yeah, there you go. 0:11:32.320 --> 0:11:35.199 You made it clear. She probably did not, because I've 0:11:35.200 --> 0:11:37.200 also not made it clear and still just chilled it. 0:11:37.200 --> 0:11:41.679 And but but I'll make it so right. She no, right, right, right, right, 0:11:41.720 --> 0:11:43.360 But hold on, let's stop for a second. We're talking 0:11:43.360 --> 0:11:45.160 about women before her man's house, and I feel like 0:11:45.200 --> 0:11:47.959 this is very important. Do you think when a woman 0:11:47.960 --> 0:11:50.000 goes upstairs with a man that it always has to 0:11:50.000 --> 0:11:53.559 be expected? Always, not always, but for the majority. And 0:11:53.600 --> 0:11:56.599 I'll be completely honest with you. I met Lawyer Bay 0:11:56.760 --> 0:12:03.240 at a barbecue in Harlem and we were walked up nutcrackers, nigga, summertime, Hello, nigga, 0:12:03.280 --> 0:12:06.120 what you think? So we were super feeling each other 0:12:06.679 --> 0:12:10.000 and we were talking about coming back to my place 0:12:10.040 --> 0:12:12.880 after and we had such a good time. I literally 0:12:12.880 --> 0:12:16.280 told him, listen, I really like you and I'd like 0:12:16.360 --> 0:12:17.560 to go on a date with you, and if you 0:12:17.600 --> 0:12:20.120 come back to my house, we're probably gonna fun because 0:12:20.280 --> 0:12:22.240 I just know if I'm inviting you over my house, 0:12:22.280 --> 0:12:25.800 we've been drinking, we've been vibing all day, it's gonna happen. 0:12:25.840 --> 0:12:28.200 And if you don't want to funk somebody, don't allow 0:12:28.240 --> 0:12:31.880 them into your space. I feel like, especially in certain circumstances, 0:12:31.920 --> 0:12:34.680 and I feel like after a date you've been drinking, 0:12:34.720 --> 0:12:37.560 I agree. I'm like, I'm here with you like I don't. 0:12:37.679 --> 0:12:40.000 I don't really go to due's houses unless I know 0:12:40.040 --> 0:12:42.800 I'm gonna I'm gonna be honest. There has been moments 0:12:42.800 --> 0:12:44.440 in my life where like I'm hanging out with someone 0:12:44.440 --> 0:12:46.440 and I don't want it to stop, and I feel 0:12:46.440 --> 0:12:48.480 like it's thank you, and I feel like they can. 0:12:48.520 --> 0:12:50.760 I'm really fucked up, guys, And that's why there's two 0:12:50.840 --> 0:12:54.360 things of water the video, Um, thank you, Chris. And 0:12:54.600 --> 0:12:56.520 I think that it's okay for women to still want 0:12:56.520 --> 0:12:59.080 to hang out and not feel pressured into sex. It's fine, 0:12:59.120 --> 0:13:01.560 and it sucks because it's something that I've done often. 0:13:01.600 --> 0:13:03.160 Sometimes you don't want to kiss in the street, bro. 0:13:03.320 --> 0:13:06.720 Well not only that. So there's been times I genuinely 0:13:06.800 --> 0:13:09.000 just want male company because I'm a Netflix watcher and 0:13:09.040 --> 0:13:10.880 I just like to cuddle, and so I have to 0:13:10.920 --> 0:13:12.959 go through a huge like listen, I don't want to 0:13:13.000 --> 0:13:15.440 funk tonight. If you want to fun, don't come over. 0:13:15.480 --> 0:13:17.920 If you want head, don't come over, like I genuine 0:13:18.160 --> 0:13:20.400 but I have to lay those guys. It's like, goddamn 0:13:20.400 --> 0:13:24.320 shame we do. It is but I think and as niggas, 0:13:24.320 --> 0:13:27.000 I ain't gonna lie. Some niggas be trying to front. 0:13:27.600 --> 0:13:29.360 That's not all I wanted from you. What you mean 0:13:30.640 --> 0:13:33.920 and this is this is a problem with what happened 0:13:33.960 --> 0:13:35.480 to this girl. I'm gonna tell you right now, and 0:13:35.559 --> 0:13:38.040 I'm the one to fault for it too. I've told 0:13:38.120 --> 0:13:39.960 niggas like I'm not gonna suck you when I come 0:13:40.000 --> 0:13:44.160 over there, and I and I knew I was lying, right, okay, 0:13:44.240 --> 0:13:45.880 you know what I'm saying. I'd be like, why and 0:13:46.160 --> 0:13:48.360 have you had a female do that? Been? Like? Now 0:13:48.400 --> 0:13:50.439 you know we're not gonna fuck, And then they come 0:13:50.440 --> 0:13:53.400 over and we're all guilty. Yeah, but then we think 0:13:53.440 --> 0:13:59.640 we just have l g Oh she was but they 0:13:59.679 --> 0:14:02.199 called him, but I do I do want to say, 0:14:02.520 --> 0:14:06.480 um him her not moving her mouth for a kiss 0:14:06.520 --> 0:14:09.560 and things like that, I honestly thought should have been 0:14:09.679 --> 0:14:11.880 enough for him. My whole role. We went to eat together. 0:14:12.000 --> 0:14:13.840 Name's Maya. She was sitting in front of me and 0:14:13.880 --> 0:14:16.520 she says, no, my nigga, Like, I've played that bullshit too, 0:14:17.120 --> 0:14:21.080 and I wanted some day to be like because maybe 0:14:21.160 --> 0:14:23.680 all me and I'd be like and this is why 0:14:23.800 --> 0:14:26.520 that actual no was really necessary. Now, this is why 0:14:26.520 --> 0:14:27.720 I want to talk about it with you. And money 0:14:27.720 --> 0:14:29.840 because I felt like a confidence issue is why this 0:14:29.880 --> 0:14:34.440 girl didn't say no. I have been this girl. Like, 0:14:34.600 --> 0:14:37.040 to be honest with you, this couldn't happen to me today, 0:14:37.080 --> 0:14:39.640 but I've definitely slept what didn't want to because I 0:14:39.680 --> 0:14:41.600 was with a celebrity or an athlete and I was like, 0:14:41.600 --> 0:14:43.160 oh my god, this guy is high, and like I 0:14:43.200 --> 0:14:45.040 really want him to like not kick me out, or 0:14:45.480 --> 0:14:47.280 you know, just like the young dumb mind thinking like 0:14:47.360 --> 0:14:49.480 what do you think women have to know? Or like 0:14:49.800 --> 0:14:51.640 how is it easier to get out of those situations? 0:14:51.680 --> 0:14:56.960 What could have been done for her? Honestly you already Yeah, 0:14:57.240 --> 0:15:00.760 I think more women need weapons in their bags. Then 0:15:01.200 --> 0:15:03.560 I tell all the ladies that I work with this, 0:15:04.120 --> 0:15:06.640 you guys need to have visible weapons, and I tell 0:15:06.720 --> 0:15:09.200 them you need to pull them out by accident, on 0:15:09.240 --> 0:15:17.120 a on a date. If it gets, if it gets exactly, 0:15:17.480 --> 0:15:20.240 if it gets, if it gets a little bit weird, 0:15:20.360 --> 0:15:22.880 because it's because you get weird. You're saying that because 0:15:22.920 --> 0:15:24.800 people are saying the reason this girl didn't say no, 0:15:25.040 --> 0:15:26.520 which is one of least the things, is because he 0:15:26.520 --> 0:15:29.240 could have got violent. That's why you're saying that. I 0:15:30.880 --> 0:15:32.480 work with a lot of girls I see. For me, 0:15:32.560 --> 0:15:34.640 I'm a bigger woman, so a lot of men, they're 0:15:34.640 --> 0:15:37.800 not gonna really test me like that. And I know that, 0:15:38.160 --> 0:15:43.440 but I work with I work. I'm telling you because 0:15:43.480 --> 0:15:46.280 I already know. I already know when I sit my 0:15:46.360 --> 0:15:49.480 ass down, they know ain't too much pushing you're gonna 0:15:49.480 --> 0:15:51.760 do to get me down, So they're not going to 0:15:51.840 --> 0:15:54.880 try that. But we're sitting there, there's her face is 0:15:54.920 --> 0:15:58.120 weeked off, but she's a tiny little things exactly, and 0:15:58.240 --> 0:16:00.280 a lot of I feel like, this happens, and this 0:16:00.360 --> 0:16:04.560 kid is more, Uh, this happens. This can happen with 0:16:04.960 --> 0:16:07.280 smaller girls. So I always let them know, you gotta 0:16:07.360 --> 0:16:10.400 take something on these on these dates, I don't care 0:16:10.440 --> 0:16:12.560 what it is. And I think that a lot of 0:16:12.600 --> 0:16:17.400 us underestimate that. I think you have to dying out here. 0:16:18.640 --> 0:16:22.120 I also think that it's very important to let our 0:16:22.160 --> 0:16:25.360 listeners know if they're in this position. I get them 0:16:25.360 --> 0:16:28.680 possibly being scared of physical violence um occurring or an 0:16:28.720 --> 0:16:32.160 actual rape, But to me, I feel like it's important 0:16:32.160 --> 0:16:34.480 for women to know that they have the power to 0:16:34.800 --> 0:16:39.080 if you're uncomfortable, bitch lead um. There's a lot of 0:16:39.080 --> 0:16:41.320 times that a lot of times that even if I'm 0:16:41.360 --> 0:16:43.560 on a date and it's not going well. You know 0:16:43.600 --> 0:16:45.920 what I do. I pay my portion of the motherfucking bill. 0:16:47.400 --> 0:16:49.160 So to me, if you're at a Nickel's house and 0:16:49.520 --> 0:16:52.600 you feel I'm not saying that on the countertop, I 0:16:52.640 --> 0:16:55.840 can see her being confused. Once she got to that bathroom, 0:16:55.880 --> 0:16:58.040 that was time to go right and at that point 0:16:58.400 --> 0:17:02.080 be like, listen, I see what that was your shape? 0:17:02.320 --> 0:17:04.720 And all she had to say was listen, I see, Um, 0:17:04.800 --> 0:17:06.600 we're not on the same page, and I'd love to 0:17:06.640 --> 0:17:08.879 see you again, but this isn't what I want tonight, 0:17:09.160 --> 0:17:11.040 and bitch, grab your bag and leave. And I listened 0:17:11.080 --> 0:17:12.760 to It's funny. I listened to Andrew Schultz a lot. 0:17:12.840 --> 0:17:14.879 He's been talking about it all week, and he's like 0:17:15.000 --> 0:17:16.919 that bitch probably didn't have no heater on at her 0:17:16.960 --> 0:17:18.280 house or something, that we just wanted to be in 0:17:18.320 --> 0:17:23.560 a nice house. I mean, it was funny, But um, 0:17:23.600 --> 0:17:25.280 I want to say this one thing. I had an 0:17:25.320 --> 0:17:28.480 experience like this with um, a popular R and B 0:17:28.680 --> 0:17:31.440 singer to this day, and I met him, and I 0:17:31.640 --> 0:17:33.160 gotta say the name. I'm gonna beleef it. But bitch, 0:17:33.160 --> 0:17:35.200 I want to know. I want to tell you what 0:17:35.280 --> 0:17:38.919 is it. I'm gonna write down have him no so embarrassed, 0:17:40.240 --> 0:17:42.440 No way, I almost sucked him, but I had pink 0:17:42.480 --> 0:17:49.360 I okay, really yeah, it's so crazy because I hung out. 0:17:49.400 --> 0:17:55.680 It's someone that I mentioned that was the first first day. 0:17:55.840 --> 0:17:59.119 But see, I guess both of us. That's even just 0:17:59.240 --> 0:18:02.040 us saying we've had different experiences with guys because I've 0:18:02.080 --> 0:18:04.440 been around him many times that I've never gotten that 0:18:04.480 --> 0:18:08.760 by firm. He wasn't forceful like that, but he gave 0:18:08.800 --> 0:18:11.119 me this Like I was only twenty I live in Miami. 0:18:11.200 --> 0:18:13.159 Maybe I was twenty one. I don't remember. But anyway, 0:18:13.200 --> 0:18:21.720 long story short, Um, I was out there and came um, 0:18:21.760 --> 0:18:23.880 and so I went back to his room and like 0:18:24.560 --> 0:18:27.040 I remember feeling like he left with me. He was like, 0:18:27.080 --> 0:18:28.400 do you want to keep kicking with me or something 0:18:28.440 --> 0:18:30.320 like that, and I remember feeling like I left with him. 0:18:30.480 --> 0:18:32.320 So I had to do something with him, like he 0:18:32.400 --> 0:18:35.159 chose me. And but this is a young like I 0:18:35.480 --> 0:18:37.400 see this person on TV. I'm like in this fucking 0:18:37.720 --> 0:18:39.520 and I remember crying the next day too, So we 0:18:39.560 --> 0:18:40.960 went back to the hotel room. It was he was 0:18:40.960 --> 0:18:43.119 in the Fountain Blue and I remember being there. He 0:18:43.200 --> 0:18:44.760 ordered food and I was like, oh my god, like 0:18:44.800 --> 0:18:47.359