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Speaker 1: Y'all know what time to y'all don't know y'all bag

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Speaker 1: all sung looking back to back down, giving the move

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Speaker 1: like the molking buck bus things and it's tub y'all

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Speaker 1: to be true. Good to study. Yeah, listening to me

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Speaker 1: together for sto bar hand quickly to listen money w

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Speaker 1: don't you join? Yeah? Yeah? By joining me said do

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Speaker 1: you turn the love go? Yeah? You gotta turn to

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Speaker 1: turn out, turn lobby, got to turn out to turn

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Speaker 1: the water the water go. Come come on your back

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Speaker 1: at it. I sure will. A good morning everybody. Y'are

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Speaker 1: listening to the voice, Come on dig me NW one

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Speaker 1: and only. Steve Harvey got a radio show. I have

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Speaker 1: something and it's so describes how I was living. It's

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Speaker 1: so captures the feelings that I had about beginning on

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Speaker 1: the pathway of my dreams. It's so describes how I

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Speaker 1: felt when I was about to attempt something. And I

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Speaker 1: have some striking news for you. It describes often how

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Speaker 1: I feel still today to a degree. So let me

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Speaker 1: tell you what that is. And I know what's happened

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Speaker 1: to a lot of people. Here's an analogy that I um.

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Speaker 1: I've heard a couple of different ways, but I've kind of,

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Speaker 1: you know, fixed it around to where I can uh

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Speaker 1: drink it better, and I think it fits my personality

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Speaker 1: to describe it to people best this way. You know,

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Speaker 1: I was I was talking. I've talked often about the

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Speaker 1: urgency of doing something with your life, of of getting

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Speaker 1: started today, of stopping the procrastination and putting it off,

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Speaker 1: and waiting on all your ducks to line up in

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Speaker 1: a row, and waiting until the stars aligned themselves. If

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Speaker 1: if you ain't on such a thing, you're you're You're

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Speaker 1: never gonna get started. I don't really, I don't know

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Speaker 1: too many people who can say that all the ducks

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Speaker 1: just lined up in a row. Things happen. Things happen

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Speaker 1: even when you get them lined up. One of the

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Speaker 1: ducks get out of line, or somebody knock over the domino,

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Speaker 1: or something happens. But here's here's here's here's here's the

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Speaker 1: point I'm getting at. God has so many blessings available

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Speaker 1: to you, you who's listening. God has so many blessings

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Speaker 1: available to you from where you are right now. I

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Speaker 1: don't care what you've gotten yourself into or what you've done.

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Speaker 1: God has so many blessings that he can send your way,

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Speaker 1: But you have to do something. See a lot of

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Speaker 1: people just sit around and go man, I don't and

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Speaker 1: something always happening to you. You're always getting a break.

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Speaker 1: You're always doing this. You always do man, don't nothing

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Speaker 1: come my way. Listen to me. If nothing ever comes

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Speaker 1: your way, you know why that is. It's because you're

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Speaker 1: not doing anything. God has all these blessings he wants

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Speaker 1: to send you, but you got to give him something

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Speaker 1: to work with. Now you have to give God something

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Speaker 1: to work with. God will bless you. God can touch

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Speaker 1: people's hearts on your behalf. He move situations around for you.

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Speaker 1: He can align the stars. He can set the ducks

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Speaker 1: up in the road. But align the stars and move

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Speaker 1: people around, and touch people's hearts and set the ducks

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Speaker 1: up in the road. For what based on what have

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Speaker 1: you put forth? Any effort? Have you made a single

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Speaker 1: step in any direction to do the right thing or

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Speaker 1: go the right way? That gives him something to put

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Speaker 1: his finger on. Come on, man, God can only bless

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Speaker 1: you according to your faith. If you have a little

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Speaker 1: bit of faith, give him that, let him work with that.

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Speaker 1: He can do that. You know, man, I didn't always

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Speaker 1: start with these speeches you're hear in the morning. Now,

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Speaker 1: I ain't always had these. I grew to these. I

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Speaker 1: stumbled my way to these. I messed up my way

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Speaker 1: to these. Here, I got it wrong so many times

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Speaker 1: to be able to sound like I got some sense.

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Speaker 1: I said it often. Failure is a one the full teacher.

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Speaker 1: Do you know how many times I have had to

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Speaker 1: have failed to have what I have in my head today.

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Speaker 1: I'm telling you, man, it's a process. People get mad

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Speaker 1: at the process. You got to do something to give

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Speaker 1: God something to work with. He'll bless you. But what

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Speaker 1: you want me to bless if you ain't putting forth

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Speaker 1: any effort, any effort, if you just sit down and start.

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Speaker 1: I got a book coming out, I'm telling you, man,

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Speaker 1: that's going to really explain this thoroughly. Man, Where you

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Speaker 1: can get blessed from whoever you are in your life,

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Speaker 1: wherever your starting point is, wherever you find yourself wound up,

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Speaker 1: you can get you can get it back from. Now.

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Speaker 1: I've done it, man, by the grace of God, I've

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Speaker 1: done it. I I got got over. Man. I learned

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Speaker 1: some things along the way. Because here's the deal. As

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Speaker 1: long as God keeps waking you up in the morning.

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Speaker 1: He ain't through with you yet. When he's done, you're done.

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Speaker 1: But if God still has a plan for you you

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Speaker 1: wake up in the morning, He's still got some more

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Speaker 1: work for you to do. You wake up in the morning.

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Speaker 1: So if you keep waking up, man, it's something that

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Speaker 1: God wants from you, would love to have from you,

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Speaker 1: and he can work with you, man, if you just

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Speaker 1: walk towards him a little bit. So here's the deal.

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Speaker 1: I know it's hard for the average person to start

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Speaker 1: because the fear of the unknown is incredible. What if

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Speaker 1: I failed? What if I don't get picked? You know,

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Speaker 1: one of the hardest things I ever did was walking

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Speaker 1: in to quit my job. Oh man, let me tell

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Speaker 1: you about that day when I decided that I was

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Speaker 1: gonna be a full time comedian after winning an amateur

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Speaker 1: night one time, quitting your job, following your dream, going

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Speaker 1: forward despite all the nay says, it's like stepping off

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Speaker 1: a cliff. It's like actually just walking off the edge

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Speaker 1: of a cliff, hoping, hoping. Now not really knowing, but

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Speaker 1: hoping hoping is the bad basis of faith. I stepped

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Speaker 1: off that cliff hoping that my parachute would open and

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Speaker 1: allow me to drift down. See, I've never sky dived before,

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Speaker 1: but I would imagine part of the thrill. And I

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Speaker 1: don't know this because I'm not going to sky dive

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Speaker 1: to find out. I think part of the thrill for

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Speaker 1: people is the danger part of throwing yourself out a

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Speaker 1: plane and how it feels to be free falling, but

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Speaker 1: the whole time they're free falling, having this exhilarating, over

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Speaker 1: the top moment. You have got to believe in your

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Speaker 1: heart of hearts, you have got the hope with everything

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Speaker 1: in you that when you pull this cord the shoot

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Speaker 1: opens or else. This ain't a good move at all.

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Speaker 1: But you've packed your shoot yourself, You've taken the lessons,

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Speaker 1: so you go ahead and you make the leap. Now,

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Speaker 1: the only thing about putting your job and following your

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Speaker 1: dream is you ain't really been trained all that good

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Speaker 1: for this, and you aren't really You didn't pack your shoot,

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Speaker 1: but you ain't never opened it before. So I walked

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Speaker 1: off this cliff, That's what it was like. And you

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Speaker 1: following your dream is like you're walking off a cliff. Now,

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Speaker 1: let me tell you something. Here's the part where people

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Speaker 1: don't never make the jump. They see somebody like myself

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Speaker 1: who jumped off the cliff and the and and the

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Speaker 1: pass shot don't open right away, and I hit a

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Speaker 1: couple of rocks on the way down. I got my

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Speaker 1: back cut up pretty bad. I got my clothes ripped off.

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Speaker 1: They see that three years living in a car man

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Speaker 1: he got his life toe down jumping off that cliff.

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Speaker 1: I ain't jumping off that cliff. But see, what you

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Speaker 1: don't understand is you don't you don't know it. But

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Speaker 1: eventually the shoot will open and I'm at the parachute

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Speaker 1: opening part of my life. Man, where the shooting open

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Speaker 1: and I'm drifting and I'm able to go over the

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Speaker 1: Harris Gut my shoote over to Paris and glide. I've

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Speaker 1: I've glided over to Africa and seen what it looked like.

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Speaker 1: It's a slow ride down. When the pass shute finally open,

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Speaker 1: and my back then heell too, and the cuts that

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Speaker 1: I had on me, I remember now I know how

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Speaker 1: to stay away from the edge. But the parachute then opened,

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Speaker 1: and I'm enjoying my life for the first time. I'm gliding,

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Speaker 1: but I got hit up against the rock. I can

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Speaker 1: see more. I get a chance to see more things.

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Speaker 1: I get to glide and see more parts of the world.

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Speaker 1: I'm living my dream. The pass SHOOTE open. Your pass

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Speaker 1: SHOOTE is gone open. But I'll tell you one thing

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Speaker 1: for sure, it will never open if you don't step

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Speaker 1: off that cliff. You got to step off that cliff,

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Speaker 1: got to get the pass SHOOTE open for you. But

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Speaker 1: you got to jump. Baby. That's the hard part, ain't it. Now?

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Speaker 1: Question is into this story right here today, when you're jumping,

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Speaker 1: I want to wish you and your family are very,

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Speaker 1: very happy holidays from all of us here to Steve

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Speaker 1: Harvey Morning Show. You're listening Steve Show. Ladies and jit

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Speaker 1: boards and girls, people from all around the world. Check

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Speaker 1: me out, check us out, check it out. This is

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Speaker 1: the Steve Harvey Martin Showaches invited. Come on, roaches. You

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Speaker 1: ain't gotta want them. So what you do is you know,

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Speaker 1: like back why stayed? You know back in the day,

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Speaker 1: it was simply if you can't you remember the montre

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Speaker 1: You know, if you can't beat them, join them. I

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Speaker 1: knew people where you just joined them? Do you just

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Speaker 1: ignore him? You saw him? WoT you just gone at

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Speaker 1: your business man? Yeah? You wear yourself out trying to

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Speaker 1: kill every roach. Man. You just couldn't do it. Exhausted,

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Speaker 1: I'm talking about man. Somebody stop and slap you know

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Speaker 1: what I'm saying. Just don't end up on my peanut

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Speaker 1: but and jelly salmich. I'm good, No, I feel that's true, stake.

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Speaker 1: Just don't end up on my plate. Just let me

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Speaker 1: set the seven down and don't end up morning that.

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Speaker 1: We're good. Okay, you were just seeing a leg on that.

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Speaker 1: It was just the leg. I don't want to talk about.

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Speaker 1: I'm sorry. I shouldn't have started my bad. Let's just

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Speaker 1: start over doing the day. I'm Frankie Beverly made said.

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Speaker 1: I know, I bought it on myself. Yeah, I oh, no,

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Speaker 1: blame to no one. Yeah, that's what I just did.

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Speaker 1: We're gonna talk about. This is Monday morning. Man, everything's good.

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Speaker 1: The world is still alive and ticket Trump still doing

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Speaker 1: his thing. Oh my god, you're absolutely right. All right.

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Speaker 1: When we come back, it's time to start something funny.

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Speaker 1: We'll be back at thirty two after Hey, look, if

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Speaker 1: you love the beach music, all inclusive food and rinks me,

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Speaker 1: then I want you to join me up in the

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Speaker 1: second angle, saying the sould festival in the d R.

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Speaker 1: Go on over to Steve Harvey saying the soul dot

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Speaker 1: com to reserve your room today. Hey Tommy Jay, come,

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Speaker 1: what's that? What's up? You know what we need to

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Speaker 1: give American people who are gonna get the gift? They

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Speaker 1: don't want to fix your face when you open it.

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Speaker 1: Play it off that you happy. Tickets from your kids

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Speaker 1: and bless their hard that's all the money they head

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Speaker 1: all right, Oh just lie, oh dish washing. Yeah, I

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Speaker 1: get you, ye something we got to play together. People

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Speaker 1: doing the best they can for you. Don't give me

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Speaker 1: handkerchi box of white Man. How about you that big

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Speaker 1: bunch of paper towels they because I know you always

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Speaker 1: n yeah. I mean, there's no really way to say.

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Speaker 1: I mean when you say the gift and you gotta

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Speaker 1: fix your faith? Oh wow. Thank you for the college days.

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Speaker 1: I didn't even know what Colin turned up. Thank you

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Speaker 1: for the whole little capsule. Don't get you that you

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Speaker 1: don't want to. I don't want none of that our belts.

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Speaker 1: I needed a group of variety of bills. Thank you,

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Speaker 1: But you flip it over. It's a different different you

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Speaker 1: give me like Man, Gucci or Louis Bell. Let you

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Speaker 1: hear your wife? Yeah, hey baby, you're listening to Steve

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Speaker 1: Harvey Morning Show. All right, we're back, we're here. So Shelly,

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Speaker 1: what is this I'm doing? Now? Okay? Well, you know

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Speaker 1: how we always say, asked the CEO? How we always

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Speaker 1: ask you questions and you give us very beautiful, lovely, wonderful,

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Speaker 1: responsible answers. So we're gonna, we're gonna, we're available for

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Speaker 1: you to ask us questions. We're gonna ask us what

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Speaker 1: we bring to this show. Yeah, you know, I ain't

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Speaker 1: gonna ask you what I want to So far, so fun.

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Speaker 1: See why who first, Shirley? Let's go with Tommy First, Tommy,

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Speaker 1: why should I continue to pay you what I'm paying you? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: This real, and I'm stupid, ignorant, and I bring all

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Speaker 1: that to the table every single day. And that's what happened.

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Speaker 1: You get it? Man? And if I roll over the

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Speaker 1: juniors quote truth be told, I'm gonna get a little

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Speaker 1: bit more told. Is as stupid as you. Let's go

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Speaker 1: with Carla Carlin. Yes, sir, who do you consider to

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Speaker 1: be the least effective person on the stack? Was ready for? That?

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Speaker 1: Is my courtion? Who is the what the least effective

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Speaker 1: person on this staff can't be me. I just got here,

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Speaker 1: yea long time. All right, I'm ready with my head.

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Speaker 1: What is it? I've narrowed it down to two people.

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Speaker 1: Keep narrowing, and I've made my final decision. Who is it? Tommy?

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Speaker 1: And I agree with you, Thank you very much. Next,

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Speaker 1: let's go with Junior. J Junior, do you think that's

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Speaker 1: your voice? The tone in your voice will be called

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Speaker 1: for a pay reduction here, that's how you don't sound

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Speaker 1: like an adult. No, no, I think it's called for

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Speaker 1: a pay raid. This is hot. I get the hob

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Speaker 1: and ship my money match my just ask it, and

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Speaker 1: I'm really out of the dolt. Yeah, I know that. Okay,

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Speaker 1: we're gonna do Jay last, so go ahead and ask me.

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Speaker 1: Hey man, so what really happened over there time during

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Speaker 1: the morning while yours is over here? Well, it was

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Speaker 1: late one night and I saw the light. I didn't

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Speaker 1: feel right. I said, this is a good time to

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Speaker 1: escape and go to the other plantation. So I cut

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Speaker 1: the Bible wire with my teeth and all the way

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Speaker 1: over here, why machine guns was shooting over my I

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Speaker 1: was to feel yelling, yelling, please, somebody hit me. And

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Speaker 1: I came up through the ground right out dug a

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Speaker 1: hole after got on the outside of the fence because

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Speaker 1: I wanted to come up and the scenics. That's why

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Speaker 1: I asked you, whoa my teeth? Only person? Yeah, I

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Speaker 1: was gonna say, asked me. Then asked Jay, but go ahead,

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Speaker 1: asked me. I'm ready, Yes, sir? What is your value?

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Speaker 1: If the first of all you suck for that question?

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Speaker 1: I know you're the CEO, but I'm I'm everything. I

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Speaker 1: don't think the show could function without me. That's great answer.

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Speaker 1: Thank you? Something missing it? Thank you. That's why I

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Speaker 1: never take vacation. Now, you're scared if you go where

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Speaker 1: you come back it won't be I got to stay here.

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Speaker 1: Where is that? Is that the kind of questions you're

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Speaker 1: gonna ask? You want some? Well? I mean I think

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Speaker 1: we have time for another. Okay, let's start again with Tommy. Tommy, Yes,

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Speaker 1: what is it? What is it that bothers you? The mote? Oh?

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Speaker 1: Thank you, true, Thank you so much. I just want

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Speaker 1: to I try to be as aggravating this. I want

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Speaker 1: you very much. Yeah, let's go back to Carla. Let's

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Speaker 1: go to Carlin. Carl what disturbs you the most about

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Speaker 1: your position here at the Morning Show, the lack of

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Speaker 1: pay you and calling that will continue to disturb you

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Speaker 1: for years to come. Let's go to Junior. J Junior, Okay,

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Speaker 1: do you have any plan ever of bringing a family

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Speaker 1: into the Morning Show that we couldn't meet? Wife, kids,

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Speaker 1: things like that? No, No, you're gonna find out who

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Speaker 1: are really? Ain't rid he ain't nothing a talking down?

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Speaker 1: Let no, no, nobody. Okay, I think we have temper

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Speaker 1: at least one more with Jay got Do you think

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Speaker 1: that you're being a die? Betty should be something? What's

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Speaker 1: not a problem? You should get some type of taking

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Speaker 1: some money? Baby orange juice? Why did you buy somebody?

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Speaker 1: How does he think orange? You people think that just

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Speaker 1: drink orange juice? Down, Junia, head of crisis. Alright, that

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Speaker 1: concludes this version of church complaints. Coming up next. You're

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Speaker 1: listening to the Steve Harvey Morning Show. I am deacon

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Speaker 1: deaf jam as you know, I'm past the motown, is

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Speaker 1: in a route right now. He'll be here momentarily. But

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Speaker 1: of course the one, the one and only Deacon add no,

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Speaker 1: it is here, Reverend morning, I'm a reverence. Are you

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Speaker 1: can you make it through this? This morning. I got

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Speaker 1: my mouth closed with my breathe at home. No way,

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Speaker 1: your mouth is closed, it's completely closed. Before we get started,

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Speaker 1: can you just has to tell us what's around with you.

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Speaker 1: It's not sight, it's in case you think that it's

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Speaker 1: just a birth defect, no sign congestion. No, there's nothing there.

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Speaker 1: There's nothing there that it checked and there's nothing there.

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Speaker 1: I've gone to the doctor or come back and he said,

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Speaker 1: you know what, there's nothing there. And so I'm saying

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Speaker 1: to you, there's nothing. You're saying, you're clear, completely clear.

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Speaker 1: This is a this is a good day for me today.

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Speaker 1: Some some days are breathed heavier than today. Today is

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Speaker 1: a very good day. Have been was in throat back

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Speaker 1: he out gown. That really scared me right there, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: he dropped out dead d Now, Yes, I'm fine, I'm fine.

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Speaker 1: Things good, I'm good. I'm good at all. Like you do.

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Speaker 1: After well, you get used to it, you know, I'm

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Speaker 1: second week first, maybe a couple of years, you'll get

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Speaker 1: used to just check you. Well. You used to keep

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Speaker 1: your mouth open, Okay, I'll travor that's open open man,

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Speaker 1: that's worse. That's den had not Reverend Reverend I'm sorry

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Speaker 1: you can't think. Get my thoughts together. Listen, we do

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Speaker 1: have some church to complaints. Do you think you can

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Speaker 1: make it breathe? It's just one of them, just might

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Speaker 1: be one of them. Okay, yeah, let me get started here. Um,

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Speaker 1: it's our annual foot washing day coming Saturday, and we

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Speaker 1: need you are passed of Motown to speak privately with brothers.

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Speaker 1: Titus Callaway. I don't know if you know it, reverend it,

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Speaker 1: but his left foot has only one big toe and

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Speaker 1: one little toe. There are no toes in between those two.

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Speaker 1: No no toes in between the big toe and the

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Speaker 1: little toes. That what you're saying, he has the big

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Speaker 1: one and the letter one. Definitely should not, well, that's

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Speaker 1: what I'm saying. Definitely not open toe sandals, Definitely, that

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Speaker 1: is a that's a weird look. You talk about something

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Speaker 1: that slides around your foot down the bottom and flip

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Speaker 1: flops are out there? Where would you wear open to

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Speaker 1: settles that? We need you a top with him, speak

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Speaker 1: with him, Okay, do that and stay with me. Yes,

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Speaker 1: because he comes every year to get his feet washed,

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Speaker 1: and nobody wants to wash them. Undership. She was because

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Speaker 1: between them here here between the big big one in

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Speaker 1: the letter way. It's coming though, to hurry up, it's coming.

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Speaker 1: You get quiet. I don't know when you fell off.

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Speaker 1: I don't you scanned me? What do you do between

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Speaker 1: the account? Like one? All right? Here was another one?

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Speaker 1: I as you know. The the the Death Choir sung

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Speaker 1: this past Sunday. Um, we're gonna need you are rever

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Speaker 1: no time to communicate with them that there's only one

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Speaker 1: person leading a song. They all trying to sing lead

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Speaker 1: and not and the rest need to be on the chorus.

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Speaker 1: This is not good. This is the Death Choir and

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Speaker 1: we need one of you will to speak with him.

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Speaker 1: Someone should speak to the death. I'm suggestion loud, just

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Speaker 1: as you go with a very loud Yo, it's only

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Speaker 1: one of y'all. Is that gonna be your approach to

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Speaker 1: talking to the death? Cry? You have some to the blood?

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Speaker 1: Right now? When I'm asking you something, where do you go?

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Speaker 1: You just stuff? Just do you hear me? You hear me?

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Speaker 1: To stop breathing? Uh? I'm okay, okay. If I stopped

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Speaker 1: for more than thirty minutes, then call someone, alright, then

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Speaker 1: called someone sim good. All right, we have another situation.

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Speaker 1: Listen here I send it to year old. Our very

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Speaker 1: own sister Isabel low Body, who has been selling moonshine

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Speaker 1: out of her backyard for years, is now over the

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Speaker 1: Communion ministry. We have reasons for to believe this is

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Speaker 1: why everyone is knocked out sleep halfway through service and

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Speaker 1: femiline out of church after the benediction. Now somebody's gonna

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Speaker 1: have to talk to sister Elizabeth low Body. I will

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Speaker 1: speak to her. I'm gonna say the could I get

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Speaker 1: a couple of jobs with that? First of all, they

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Speaker 1: still call it moon shot. They really do itself and

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Speaker 1: it's called mood show. Yes they do. What do they

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Speaker 1: call us? What's her Lesson low Body? Yeah, that's her name.

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Speaker 1: Why here, last name Strawberry? Nobody? Do you work at

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Speaker 1: the strawberry plantation? Right with me? In the middle of

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Speaker 1: what we're doing. They have strawberry plantations. In case you

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Speaker 1: didn't know it, well, I didn't come from one. All right,

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Speaker 1: this is no hurry, reverendad No, this is a complaint

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Speaker 1: about past the Motown Deacon Deacon Kurby, Deane squad Pump

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Speaker 1: was not sitting down the entire service. He stood up. Then,

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Speaker 1: that's because he has a boy all on his left,

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Speaker 1: but pastor actually attacked him for standing there. We'll deal

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Speaker 1: with it later. When he passed to get to you,

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Speaker 1: But that deacon curved Deane's quade pump. You're listening Steve

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Speaker 1: Harvey Morning Show. Everybody, you're truly James Browns and Steve

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Speaker 1: Harvey Morning Show. Who is the biggest liar in your family? Myself?

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Speaker 1: Who's the biggest liar in your family? My dad? Who's

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Speaker 1: the biggest liar in your family? Who in my family?

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Speaker 1: You know we're a godly family. We gotta have one.

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Speaker 1: We have adulterous Thank you very much. Who's the biggest

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Speaker 1: liar in your family? Man? That's to be the pops man.

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Speaker 1: Never come get you when he said you're gonna get you,

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Speaker 1: never give you the gift you say he's gonna give you.

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Speaker 1: You know that rangs the top of the list. Still

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Speaker 1: holding onto that pain h Man. Who's the biggest liar

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Speaker 1: in your family? Show my mom? Your mom is a

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00:31:01,360 --> 00:31:04,080
Speaker 1: big liar. Some of the lies your mom is told?

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Speaker 1: Who my father was? Whoa The question of the day is,

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Speaker 1: who is the biggest liar in your family? My uncle

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00:31:13,040 --> 00:31:17,400
Speaker 1: and my mom brother, my uncti, my mom's sister, and

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Speaker 1: I got a cousin, a little father, lie lie for

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Speaker 1: no reason? Who is the biggest liar in your family?

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Speaker 1: Who's the biggest liar in your family? What does he

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00:31:29,240 --> 00:31:35,800
Speaker 1: lie about? And who's the biggest liar in your family? Husband?

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Speaker 1: Your husband lies a lot? What's the last lie he told?

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Speaker 1: I don't even know where he is right now? Thank

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Speaker 1: you all so much? Real quick? What's the greatest morning

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Speaker 1: show in the world? Thank you so much? All right?

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Speaker 1: So uh wow. According to a new study, settling is

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Speaker 1: the secret to a long and happy relation and ship.

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Speaker 1: That's right. Realizing that the grass isn't greener somewhere else,

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Speaker 1: and that the person you're with doesn't have to be

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00:32:07,160 --> 00:32:10,360
Speaker 1: everything you're looking for but pretty darn close is the

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00:32:10,520 --> 00:32:13,960
Speaker 1: secret to a lasting union. The study also reveals the

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Speaker 1: dating apps like Tender give us way too many options,

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Speaker 1: making it hard to believe that that person we are

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00:32:20,520 --> 00:32:23,000
Speaker 1: with is the best one for us. So, Steve, what

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00:32:23,120 --> 00:32:26,720
Speaker 1: do you think about this answer? That settling? Is it?

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Speaker 1: If you want to be happy? I don't think you

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Speaker 1: if you call it settling? But you're gonna have to look.

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Speaker 1: Ain't nobody gonna be everything perfect? They might appear to

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Speaker 1: be in the beginning, but the flaws is gonna show up.

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Speaker 1: So what you gotta do is you just gotta get

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Speaker 1: with somebody who the good outweigh the bad because the

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Speaker 1: bad is coming. And then you gotta get somebody that's

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Speaker 1: worth struggling with. And if they're not worth struggling with,

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Speaker 1: you're not gonna stay in the struggle, all right, Ja,

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Speaker 1: I can't give advice on relationship, definitely not. I'm gonna

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Speaker 1: just be glad what you say, Steve, nothing not a

420
00:33:09,200 --> 00:33:12,400
Speaker 1: damn word, Captain new co host. You can't say that

421
00:33:13,040 --> 00:33:19,920
Speaker 1: the new man hush over but ship advice. Yeah, The

422
00:33:20,000 --> 00:33:22,680
Speaker 1: point is when you give my mic Also, you've been

423
00:33:22,800 --> 00:33:26,280
Speaker 1: things you've learned, you learned, you know, so you don't

424
00:33:26,560 --> 00:33:34,240
Speaker 1: repeat the same as you learn it. Damn he just

425
00:33:37,040 --> 00:33:39,400
Speaker 1: but Jay, surely you're going to get married before it's

426
00:33:39,440 --> 00:33:44,120
Speaker 1: all said? It does? Is my mike completely? What's the

427
00:33:44,200 --> 00:33:46,760
Speaker 1: longest you've been mad? That's wanted all the way off.

428
00:33:50,760 --> 00:33:55,280
Speaker 1: What's the longest you've been mad? Is your segment over? All? Right,

429
00:33:55,360 --> 00:33:58,040
Speaker 1: Come on, Steve, ladies and gentlemen, she's here with the news,

430
00:33:58,200 --> 00:34:02,320
Speaker 1: Miss and true guys. Good morning, everybody. This is an

431
00:34:02,360 --> 00:34:04,320
Speaker 1: trip for the news. While the power is back today

432
00:34:04,360 --> 00:34:08,720
Speaker 1: at the nation's busiest airport, Atlanta's Hartsfield Jackson International, yesterday,

433
00:34:08,760 --> 00:34:11,239
Speaker 1: all incoming flights were on hold and take offs were

434
00:34:11,360 --> 00:34:13,840
Speaker 1: delayed because of a power outage. Is still trying to

435
00:34:13,880 --> 00:34:17,200
Speaker 1: figure out what happened, what caused the outage. One hundreds

436
00:34:17,239 --> 00:34:20,040
Speaker 1: of flights are still nevertheless canceled today, So if you

437
00:34:20,080 --> 00:34:23,160
Speaker 1: have something that runs through that airport through Atlanta, you

438
00:34:23,239 --> 00:34:25,200
Speaker 1: need to check and make sure your carrier that that

439
00:34:25,320 --> 00:34:28,480
Speaker 1: flight is still scheduled, believe it or not. Southern California's

440
00:34:28,560 --> 00:34:32,239
Speaker 1: massive Thomas Fire continues to rage. In fact, it's now

441
00:34:32,360 --> 00:34:36,040
Speaker 1: burned through two hundred and sixty nine thousand acres. You

442
00:34:36,120 --> 00:34:38,839
Speaker 1: hear that two hundred sixty nine thousand acres and has

443
00:34:38,920 --> 00:34:43,080
Speaker 1: become California's third largest wildfire arm record. Some one thousand

444
00:34:43,160 --> 00:34:46,640
Speaker 1: homes have been destroyed thus far. The blazes about contained

445
00:34:47,000 --> 00:34:51,160
Speaker 1: and it's not. Republican leaders meanwhile on Capitol Hill making

446
00:34:51,200 --> 00:34:53,200
Speaker 1: a fast and furious push this week to get a

447
00:34:53,239 --> 00:34:56,719
Speaker 1: sweeping tax overhaul approval before Christmas. How Speaker Paul Ryan

448
00:34:56,800 --> 00:34:59,560
Speaker 1: assists that it's just what the American people need, making

449
00:34:59,640 --> 00:35:02,760
Speaker 1: jobs grow in this economy. It's about middle class incomes

450
00:35:03,120 --> 00:35:06,120
Speaker 1: going higher. This is about giving people the ability to

451
00:35:06,160 --> 00:35:07,799
Speaker 1: make ends meet in a plan for the future. I'm

452
00:35:07,840 --> 00:35:10,560
Speaker 1: so excited that we're on the cusp of this great accomplishment.

453
00:35:10,600 --> 00:35:13,120
Speaker 1: And if Congress acts by Christmas, people are going to

454
00:35:13,200 --> 00:35:16,640
Speaker 1: see games very soon, and we'll see six Miami firemen

455
00:35:16,640 --> 00:35:19,080
Speaker 1: who lost their jobs after a black colleague found pitches

456
00:35:19,120 --> 00:35:23,080
Speaker 1: of his family defaced the news raped over his belongings

457
00:35:23,320 --> 00:35:25,960
Speaker 1: then now soon to get their jobs back. Captain William Bryson,

458
00:35:26,000 --> 00:35:30,720
Speaker 1: Alejandro Sesse, Kevin Mazoso, David Rivera, Justin Rumbaud, and Harold

459
00:35:30,800 --> 00:35:34,719
Speaker 1: Santana contesting their dismissals, asking the Miami fire Fighters Union

460
00:35:34,800 --> 00:35:36,920
Speaker 1: for its support. The union is going to decide tomorrow.

461
00:35:37,160 --> 00:35:39,320
Speaker 1: Then double a CP is urging the union not to.

462
00:35:39,760 --> 00:35:42,279
Speaker 1: In Missouri, a black Kansas City fireman who said he

463
00:35:42,400 --> 00:35:44,920
Speaker 1: wasn't promoted because of his race has been awarded more

464
00:35:44,920 --> 00:35:47,880
Speaker 1: than three d fifty thousand bucks and Compenson Tory damages.

465
00:35:48,120 --> 00:35:51,360
Speaker 1: Tarshi Jones was with the department for seventeen years. He

466
00:35:51,480 --> 00:35:55,560
Speaker 1: took Captain's test five times, scoring very high each time. Nevertheless,

467
00:35:55,640 --> 00:35:58,760
Speaker 1: white fireman with lower scores and less experience were promoted

468
00:35:58,800 --> 00:36:01,600
Speaker 1: over him. Walmart has been criticized for years with the

469
00:36:01,640 --> 00:36:03,960
Speaker 1: way it treats its workers, like paying low wages. But now,

470
00:36:04,040 --> 00:36:07,160
Speaker 1: according to The New York Times, the ginormous retail company's

471
00:36:07,160 --> 00:36:09,719
Speaker 1: gonna start letting the employees receive their wages. Before the

472
00:36:09,760 --> 00:36:12,600
Speaker 1: companies paid a two week pay a day if necessaries,

473
00:36:12,640 --> 00:36:14,120
Speaker 1: you can get paid for the week that you work.

474
00:36:14,520 --> 00:36:17,040
Speaker 1: And as predicted, the latest Star Wars movie was the biggest,

475
00:36:17,360 --> 00:36:28,480
Speaker 1: found you my soul, untamed power, and beyond that something

476
00:36:29,280 --> 00:36:32,760
Speaker 1: truly special. The last Jedi pulled in a jaw dropping

477
00:36:32,800 --> 00:36:35,440
Speaker 1: two hundred and twenty million dollars twenty minutes after the

478
00:36:35,440 --> 00:36:38,080
Speaker 1: outcomes Eugene the Butterfly. Stay tuned to Steve Harvey Morning Show.

479
00:36:38,480 --> 00:36:44,040
Speaker 1: You're listening to the Steve Harvey Morning Show. Well it's

480
00:36:44,040 --> 00:36:46,640
Speaker 1: a whole another hund of day season Maine. We got

481
00:36:46,719 --> 00:36:49,879
Speaker 1: all the good pixies and sees as main Mamma nim

482
00:36:49,960 --> 00:36:53,640
Speaker 1: meaning the kitchen cookie faked chicken brisk and cook get

483
00:36:53,680 --> 00:36:56,600
Speaker 1: it up, kind of water corn read with deposit, kate

484
00:36:56,760 --> 00:36:59,840
Speaker 1: sanitance and macaron i. All that my plane. I was

485
00:37:00,000 --> 00:37:02,879
Speaker 1: about it everyp and just say rings, I'm already think

486
00:37:02,960 --> 00:37:09,040
Speaker 1: about my saving in damp around the table, families, everything

487
00:37:10,360 --> 00:37:14,960
Speaker 1: jingle pounds for me, smells and all the things that season, breathing,

488
00:37:15,680 --> 00:37:20,839
Speaker 1: shiny lights, creadings of white mamma, sweet the table. These

489
00:37:20,880 --> 00:37:24,440
Speaker 1: are the things the holiday brings, things that make your

490
00:37:24,520 --> 00:37:36,560
Speaker 1: snvery see holiday, happy holiday day. It's a hard day,

491
00:37:40,280 --> 00:37:50,760
Speaker 1: your hollow holiday happy HOLLI Jay em a reason Jay's

492
00:37:50,840 --> 00:37:55,640
Speaker 1: gone by you and me? Family stas like the thought

493
00:37:55,719 --> 00:38:01,520
Speaker 1: of July babies crying too is crying con't play space

494
00:38:02,680 --> 00:38:08,600
Speaker 1: and uncle's grains and grains come together, don't make you

495
00:38:08,760 --> 00:38:12,880
Speaker 1: want the same haw tho safe bels wee. I just

496
00:38:13,160 --> 00:38:16,920
Speaker 1: can't wait to hope to tight read the rustle tone.

497
00:38:17,239 --> 00:38:24,560
Speaker 1: I let you go, let's slow, let's shows this fee

498
00:38:24,680 --> 00:38:40,920
Speaker 1: me coming here. It's out your love holiday hard, hard reading,

499
00:38:41,560 --> 00:38:51,919
Speaker 1: shoulder especially special special. I wish every day you could

500
00:38:51,960 --> 00:39:04,719
Speaker 1: be like a holiday doll with joy and press f Yeah,

501
00:39:05,440 --> 00:39:11,600
Speaker 1: oh you got to harry. I'll beg play if I

502
00:39:11,680 --> 00:39:14,120
Speaker 1: were the kid and reminiscing, wishing it with it. It's

503
00:39:14,160 --> 00:39:17,960
Speaker 1: winning again. A pepper intament. Stay away from stuttle, gotta

504
00:39:18,040 --> 00:39:21,960
Speaker 1: green candy, gown a road, having fun, loving life, finished

505
00:39:21,960 --> 00:39:24,399
Speaker 1: things and get listen to Steve and Mom and Glad.

506
00:39:24,440 --> 00:39:27,080
Speaker 1: It's not in the middle. Everybody gather around. It's a

507
00:39:27,160 --> 00:39:30,359
Speaker 1: family of fair I wish it was a holiday every

508
00:39:30,480 --> 00:40:04,200
Speaker 1: day in a year. Just s Happy Holidays from Oatmeal

509
00:40:04,360 --> 00:40:07,000
Speaker 1: and Alison Williams. You can get happy Holiday song on

510
00:40:07,200 --> 00:40:10,200
Speaker 1: iTunes right now and play it throughout the holiday, because

511
00:40:10,200 --> 00:40:12,720
Speaker 1: that's what the holiday is all about. It's about good spirit.

512
00:40:12,800 --> 00:40:15,279
Speaker 1: That's a good spirit. That's that feel good song. Happy

513
00:40:15,320 --> 00:40:19,280
Speaker 1: Holidays from Oatmeal and Alison Williams. You're listening to Steve

514
00:40:19,400 --> 00:40:25,120
Speaker 1: Harvey Morning Show. All right, it's your boys time, he's here.

515
00:40:26,080 --> 00:40:29,279
Speaker 1: Time to slay another one, murder another one. Well, you

516
00:40:29,400 --> 00:40:33,839
Speaker 1: know what somebody told me, family, I don't know where

517
00:40:33,880 --> 00:40:38,799
Speaker 1: you got that man from a lot of merge. I'll

518
00:40:38,840 --> 00:40:42,720
Speaker 1: be weighing on these songs and been friends for years

519
00:40:43,320 --> 00:40:47,239
Speaker 1: way back, like calax, that's what he said, right, So

520
00:40:47,360 --> 00:40:49,480
Speaker 1: what's the list? The list will probably get longer today.

521
00:40:50,160 --> 00:40:53,080
Speaker 1: We're gonna put the Franklin's name on the list. Oh

522
00:40:53,200 --> 00:40:58,400
Speaker 1: my god, you mean the song is calmed Happy and

523
00:40:58,719 --> 00:41:04,520
Speaker 1: my song is calm are done? Nappy? What he get out?

524
00:41:06,080 --> 00:41:10,120
Speaker 1: You know, her chemicals can hurt children, Her chemicals can

525
00:41:10,280 --> 00:41:14,200
Speaker 1: change it change what will her chemical stud you come

526
00:41:14,239 --> 00:41:16,520
Speaker 1: on now, come on now, come on now, I'll just

527
00:41:16,840 --> 00:41:19,040
Speaker 1: let it be now, just let it be nappy right now.

528
00:41:19,719 --> 00:41:23,040
Speaker 1: I want to care with people say if they are

529
00:41:23,160 --> 00:41:27,400
Speaker 1: not trying to pay, my hair is not meant to

530
00:41:27,560 --> 00:41:33,480
Speaker 1: lett right now, keep the hat co up, phone stone

531
00:41:35,280 --> 00:41:43,640
Speaker 1: the story I like. Get nappy on your hand, that's

532
00:41:43,680 --> 00:41:48,120
Speaker 1: what you won't hurt your fingers when you run through

533
00:41:48,320 --> 00:41:55,080
Speaker 1: my head. Take it up. If it's not try a

534
00:41:55,400 --> 00:42:01,719
Speaker 1: change it fried, let it beating beat on a way.

535
00:42:02,200 --> 00:42:09,919
Speaker 1: You should know you now, said Jesus joust as well.

536
00:42:10,080 --> 00:42:13,799
Speaker 1: Looks so nice and you just want to be if

537
00:42:13,840 --> 00:42:18,560
Speaker 1: you want to be now let it be nappy right nothing,

538
00:42:19,280 --> 00:42:21,680
Speaker 1: don't you want to be and all that it's Christian

539
00:42:21,719 --> 00:42:23,640
Speaker 1: and all that it's could let it be never right now, cahol,

540
00:42:24,880 --> 00:42:29,160
Speaker 1: I just want to be annoying. I'm not gonna keep

541
00:42:29,239 --> 00:42:33,080
Speaker 1: on getting a cock and we's with they send the

542
00:42:33,200 --> 00:42:39,759
Speaker 1: prom no freaking broken talk and be nappy, happy to

543
00:42:39,920 --> 00:42:51,000
Speaker 1: be to fless a brief Robert, are you run through

544
00:42:51,160 --> 00:42:56,760
Speaker 1: her head? Never to your hair. If it's now, don't

545
00:42:57,080 --> 00:43:03,160
Speaker 1: be holis in your hands, bring it down right now.

546
00:43:03,600 --> 00:43:07,880
Speaker 1: Don't do what I say know what I'm talking about,

547
00:43:08,200 --> 00:43:17,120
Speaker 1: say let it break it down down. If you're gonna

548
00:43:17,239 --> 00:43:21,760
Speaker 1: be na the dug out to let it be napping.

549
00:43:22,120 --> 00:43:25,120
Speaker 1: Don't you let it be happy. Let it be nicking

550
00:43:25,239 --> 00:43:28,000
Speaker 1: and a thing that is right and thing I just

551
00:43:28,280 --> 00:43:33,560
Speaker 1: want to be that food. Say take that hot ass weird? Yes,

552
00:43:35,239 --> 00:43:42,399
Speaker 1: let it be home run jus like yeah, just like her.

553
00:43:43,520 --> 00:43:55,640
Speaker 1: Come on, come on, take a comb on this Christian.

554
00:43:55,800 --> 00:44:00,239
Speaker 1: What their friend that is God's little is Christian? Hold

555
00:44:00,440 --> 00:44:05,080
Speaker 1: up on the show man? What they say down to family?

556
00:44:05,239 --> 00:44:09,400
Speaker 1: You would you get him from? Where you got that

557
00:44:09,560 --> 00:44:17,359
Speaker 1: man from? One lady said, I'm back. I was trying

558
00:44:17,440 --> 00:44:19,640
Speaker 1: to find another way. Listen to that show. Now I

559
00:44:20,160 --> 00:44:28,160
Speaker 1: found it. Now it lost him him somebody you got

560
00:44:28,200 --> 00:44:34,560
Speaker 1: all the talent people on your show? Come o leque,

561
00:44:34,920 --> 00:44:44,120
Speaker 1: come on coming up, Momo nique and what she said

562
00:44:45,600 --> 00:44:50,279
Speaker 1: off for me? Yeah, let somebody else be the headline.

563
00:44:51,840 --> 00:44:59,520
Speaker 1: Did you see the video? Oh well, Kirk's name on

564
00:44:59,600 --> 00:45:06,160
Speaker 1: the list. Got something crazy? All right, we got a

565
00:45:06,280 --> 00:45:10,040
Speaker 1: frank phone call. You're listening to the Steve Harvey Morning

566
00:45:10,080 --> 00:45:12,880
Speaker 1: Show coming up at the top of the hour, right

567
00:45:12,920 --> 00:45:15,480
Speaker 1: about four minutes after today's Strawberry letter. You do not

568
00:45:15,600 --> 00:45:17,640
Speaker 1: want to miss that. But first the review is on

569
00:45:17,760 --> 00:45:21,319
Speaker 1: tap yet again with this frank phone call. What you got, well,

570
00:45:21,400 --> 00:45:23,719
Speaker 1: what you know? It depute on what you want, y'all.

571
00:45:23,800 --> 00:45:28,000
Speaker 1: How you wanted double stupid, just low stupid or just

572
00:45:28,120 --> 00:45:31,880
Speaker 1: stupid on ice. You know I'll go for stupid on

573
00:45:32,000 --> 00:45:38,719
Speaker 1: ice every time. Hello. Yes, I'm trying to reach a

574
00:45:38,880 --> 00:45:44,480
Speaker 1: tan you please, Hi, Tania. My name is Daniel, from

575
00:45:44,520 --> 00:45:49,080
Speaker 1: the head of store security here at your job. Yeah, listen,

576
00:45:49,200 --> 00:45:52,080
Speaker 1: I'm trying to see. Um, I'm gonna have to I

577
00:45:52,160 --> 00:45:53,920
Speaker 1: know to day is your day off. I'm looking at

578
00:45:54,040 --> 00:45:55,719
Speaker 1: the schedule here. It seems that you don't come back

579
00:45:55,760 --> 00:45:58,960
Speaker 1: in until Saturday. I'm trying to see if it's possible

580
00:45:59,080 --> 00:46:00,759
Speaker 1: I can get you to come of the store. There's

581
00:46:00,760 --> 00:46:03,320
Speaker 1: a bit of a situation I want to discuss with you.

582
00:46:03,480 --> 00:46:07,359
Speaker 1: There's about eighteen hundred dollars worth of merchandise missing from

583
00:46:07,400 --> 00:46:12,480
Speaker 1: the store. Yeah, as about eighteen hundred dollars worth of merchandise.

584
00:46:12,560 --> 00:46:15,160
Speaker 1: And we definitely know that this is a in the

585
00:46:15,200 --> 00:46:18,759
Speaker 1: house situation. This is not someone walking in shoplifting. This

586
00:46:18,960 --> 00:46:23,160
Speaker 1: is definitely an in house situation with employees who have

587
00:46:23,760 --> 00:46:26,920
Speaker 1: evidently been shoplifting from the store taking things and we

588
00:46:27,040 --> 00:46:29,080
Speaker 1: want to get down to the to the roots of

589
00:46:29,120 --> 00:46:34,960
Speaker 1: the problem. Well, ma'am, it's uh, it's been brought to

590
00:46:35,080 --> 00:46:37,640
Speaker 1: my attention that there's a possibility that you may be

591
00:46:38,760 --> 00:46:46,600
Speaker 1: h part of this situation. And I don't steal. You

592
00:46:46,640 --> 00:46:51,759
Speaker 1: don't call my house accusing me. Is still listening from nobody, Okay, Well,

593
00:46:51,880 --> 00:46:53,600
Speaker 1: my hangar man, what I'm trying to do is just

594
00:46:53,760 --> 00:46:59,879
Speaker 1: trying to try to say something. And I told them, Okay, wait,

595
00:47:00,000 --> 00:47:05,239
Speaker 1: it's a second. Now, do you have a sister named Cynthia. Well,

596
00:47:05,320 --> 00:47:08,320
Speaker 1: now it seems that here on some of the footage

597
00:47:08,360 --> 00:47:11,799
Speaker 1: that we have on camera that uh, it's a possibility

598
00:47:11,880 --> 00:47:14,360
Speaker 1: that it seems like your sister is actually wearing some

599
00:47:14,480 --> 00:47:18,520
Speaker 1: of the merchandise that we sell here in the store. Okay,

600
00:47:18,640 --> 00:47:21,239
Speaker 1: just because she wears something that we sell in the store,

601
00:47:21,640 --> 00:47:24,839
Speaker 1: don't mean that I stole it. Well, we don't see

602
00:47:25,440 --> 00:47:28,120
Speaker 1: where she's at. I've backed the footage up as far

603
00:47:28,200 --> 00:47:30,439
Speaker 1: as I could. I don't see any footage of where

604
00:47:30,520 --> 00:47:34,479
Speaker 1: she purchased this particular merchandise. And my assumption is maybe

605
00:47:34,600 --> 00:47:38,360
Speaker 1: you gave it to her. I gave her And just

606
00:47:38,440 --> 00:47:41,200
Speaker 1: because you don't see what somebody purchased it, don't it's

607
00:47:41,239 --> 00:47:44,320
Speaker 1: been stolen. Okay, here's what I'm gonna I'm gonna just

608
00:47:44,400 --> 00:47:46,719
Speaker 1: get to the chase of this, Tanya. What I'm gonna

609
00:47:46,760 --> 00:47:49,440
Speaker 1: have to do is this if I can't get you

610
00:47:49,680 --> 00:47:52,439
Speaker 1: to come to the store. Man. And matter of fact,

611
00:47:52,520 --> 00:47:54,600
Speaker 1: here's another question for you before I go any further.

612
00:47:54,840 --> 00:47:58,960
Speaker 1: You have children at all? Tanya? I got children? Wat

613
00:47:59,640 --> 00:48:02,359
Speaker 1: do you? Is it possible? Because I'm missing a lot

614
00:48:02,440 --> 00:48:06,759
Speaker 1: of baby merchandise as well. And you know what, you

615
00:48:06,840 --> 00:48:11,480
Speaker 1: know what you really pruss for this morning? Okay, because

616
00:48:11,480 --> 00:48:14,920
Speaker 1: you're gonna call somebody on the off day accusing them

617
00:48:14,960 --> 00:48:17,920
Speaker 1: of stealing. Okay, here's what I gotta do. Are you

618
00:48:18,080 --> 00:48:20,080
Speaker 1: coming into the office so I can talk with you.

619
00:48:21,040 --> 00:48:24,319
Speaker 1: I'm not coming no where on my off day. Well,

620
00:48:24,719 --> 00:48:27,440
Speaker 1: then what's gonna happen, miss Tanya, is I'm gonna have

621
00:48:27,600 --> 00:48:30,839
Speaker 1: to actually come to your home, check your closet. I'm

622
00:48:30,840 --> 00:48:33,000
Speaker 1: gonna have to check your kids and see if they're

623
00:48:33,640 --> 00:48:35,680
Speaker 1: check and see if they're wearing merchandise that big that

624
00:48:35,800 --> 00:48:38,040
Speaker 1: comes from this Come to my house if you want to,

625
00:48:38,320 --> 00:48:41,200
Speaker 1: and they're gonna take your somebody here in the body back.

626
00:48:41,760 --> 00:48:45,080
Speaker 1: Excuse me, you heard what I said. You heard what

627
00:48:45,160 --> 00:48:48,320
Speaker 1: I said. You don't call nobody. I bust my death store.

628
00:48:48,600 --> 00:48:51,839
Speaker 1: I bust my death store. You understand me. I work

629
00:48:51,960 --> 00:48:55,560
Speaker 1: hard for y'all. Okay, you're you've been busting. You've been busting.

630
00:48:55,600 --> 00:48:58,560
Speaker 1: You car here accusing me of stealing. I ain't so

631
00:48:59,160 --> 00:49:01,800
Speaker 1: from nobody. I don't have to steal. That's why I

632
00:49:01,960 --> 00:49:04,800
Speaker 1: work all that. You understand. I think you've been buffing

633
00:49:04,880 --> 00:49:08,000
Speaker 1: your butt. Taking stuff is what you've been doing. You've

634
00:49:08,040 --> 00:49:11,960
Speaker 1: been from nobody. You understand me. I do not steal.

635
00:49:12,440 --> 00:49:15,920
Speaker 1: I'm gonna come over there. I'm checking your closets things,

636
00:49:16,040 --> 00:49:19,080
Speaker 1: but it ain't no season. And I'm checking your babies

637
00:49:19,160 --> 00:49:21,719
Speaker 1: as well. And I'm making check my baby and see

638
00:49:21,760 --> 00:49:24,239
Speaker 1: what happens. You put your hands on any damn thing

639
00:49:24,440 --> 00:49:26,279
Speaker 1: in here, and see what happens. I don't want to

640
00:49:26,280 --> 00:49:29,720
Speaker 1: have to drag your butt here. You're gonna drag somebody.

641
00:49:29,760 --> 00:49:32,160
Speaker 1: Oh now, you threatening me. I don't want to drag

642
00:49:32,360 --> 00:49:35,440
Speaker 1: out of your house security guard to security guard. You

643
00:49:35,520 --> 00:49:37,880
Speaker 1: like your job that much you're willing to die for that?

644
00:49:38,920 --> 00:49:42,359
Speaker 1: Who said anything about me dying? I did come over here,

645
00:49:42,400 --> 00:49:44,960
Speaker 1: and that's what's gonna happen. That's what happens when you

646
00:49:45,080 --> 00:49:47,400
Speaker 1: put people on the off day, you get hurt. Okay,

647
00:49:47,880 --> 00:49:50,520
Speaker 1: I get a couple of damn days off, and y'all

648
00:49:50,560 --> 00:49:53,839
Speaker 1: gonna call me with this? So are you threatening me? Now?

649
00:49:54,320 --> 00:49:56,719
Speaker 1: I'm threatening you? Then? You just called that you was

650
00:49:56,800 --> 00:49:59,799
Speaker 1: coming over here. Yes, I did so here, bring here.

651
00:50:00,560 --> 00:50:07,239
Speaker 1: I'm don't don't let me tell you something. I get you.

652
00:50:07,440 --> 00:50:09,600
Speaker 1: I can have you brought up on charges. You know that,

653
00:50:09,840 --> 00:50:13,560
Speaker 1: Bring me up on charges and see what happens. You

654
00:50:13,760 --> 00:50:15,920
Speaker 1: see if you get that first. I'm all my way

655
00:50:16,000 --> 00:50:18,080
Speaker 1: over there now to check you and your kids. You

656
00:50:18,200 --> 00:50:20,520
Speaker 1: understand me. I'm over here to check me and my

657
00:50:20,680 --> 00:50:24,200
Speaker 1: kids and see how they check your somebody here, let

658
00:50:24,280 --> 00:50:27,440
Speaker 1: me tell you something. You got to tell me. You

659
00:50:27,480 --> 00:50:29,440
Speaker 1: ain't got nothing to tell me. You ain't got nothing.

660
00:50:31,000 --> 00:50:32,520
Speaker 1: Why don't you go ahead and tell me what you took?

661
00:50:32,760 --> 00:50:36,080
Speaker 1: Maybe I'll go light on, I'll go like stid or something.

662
00:50:36,719 --> 00:50:38,920
Speaker 1: You don't sound like a damn food. Why don't you

663
00:50:39,000 --> 00:50:42,080
Speaker 1: tell me what you took? I bet you teaching your

664
00:50:42,080 --> 00:50:44,040
Speaker 1: little kids over there how to steal too, aren't you

665
00:50:44,600 --> 00:50:52,080
Speaker 1: what you teach kids? Hey? Hey, hey, now you hey, hey, hey,

666
00:50:52,360 --> 00:50:56,160
Speaker 1: don't call me with this book. Let me tell you

667
00:50:56,320 --> 00:50:58,640
Speaker 1: one moth Are you listening to me? I got one

668
00:50:58,719 --> 00:51:00,799
Speaker 1: more thing to say to you. You ain't got nothing

669
00:51:00,840 --> 00:51:03,719
Speaker 1: else to say to me? Are you listening? What this is?

670
00:51:03,960 --> 00:51:07,600
Speaker 1: Nephew timing from the Steve Harvey Martin Show. You just

671
00:51:07,840 --> 00:51:14,200
Speaker 1: got prank sister sid to you? Okay? Are you and

672
00:51:14,360 --> 00:51:17,759
Speaker 1: that broad want to play game? Okay, y'all want to

673
00:51:17,800 --> 00:51:20,879
Speaker 1: play right? Y'all got jokes. Y'all got jokes. I got

674
00:51:21,040 --> 00:51:25,320
Speaker 1: joke for both of y'all around here taking care of

675
00:51:25,440 --> 00:51:31,840
Speaker 1: her and all her ugly play with me day alight?

676
00:51:32,000 --> 00:51:34,759
Speaker 1: Tell you to me? She told me, she said that

677
00:51:34,920 --> 00:51:37,480
Speaker 1: timmy be be pranking people. You can't nobody get me

678
00:51:37,600 --> 00:51:39,560
Speaker 1: that on crazy stuff that come to people? Don't know?

679
00:51:39,640 --> 00:51:42,000
Speaker 1: Somebody calling and tripping with this. You told me you couldn't.

680
00:51:42,160 --> 00:51:46,200
Speaker 1: You thought you couldn't be got That's all right, y'all

681
00:51:46,280 --> 00:51:48,920
Speaker 1: got me. Let me ask you one more thing. What

682
00:51:49,239 --> 00:51:54,160
Speaker 1: is the baddest radio show in the land? Steve Harvey

683
00:51:54,280 --> 00:52:03,560
Speaker 1: Morning Show? First of all was fun? Now in other news, uh, Facebook,

684
00:52:04,239 --> 00:52:07,080
Speaker 1: We're all on Facebook at some time or another. Facebook

685
00:52:07,200 --> 00:52:09,880
Speaker 1: is still a huge deal, with about a quarter of

686
00:52:10,040 --> 00:52:14,400
Speaker 1: every human on on planet Earth having a Facebook account.

687
00:52:14,560 --> 00:52:17,520
Speaker 1: That's real. But it looks like Facebook might be slipping

688
00:52:17,680 --> 00:52:20,640
Speaker 1: just a bit, as there are three point four percent

689
00:52:20,760 --> 00:52:23,919
Speaker 1: fewer teens between the ages of twelve and seventeen using

690
00:52:24,000 --> 00:52:27,920
Speaker 1: Facebook this year than there were in two thousand sixteen

691
00:52:28,040 --> 00:52:31,560
Speaker 1: last year. Instead, they've just switched to Instagram and Snapchat.

692
00:52:31,680 --> 00:52:34,160
Speaker 1: So that's what the young people are doing there on Instagram,

693
00:52:34,280 --> 00:52:37,800
Speaker 1: they're on Snapchat. Older people are on Facebook. Yeah, I know,

694
00:52:37,920 --> 00:52:44,319
Speaker 1: come my mom on comment on everything. I pope that's

695
00:52:44,360 --> 00:52:50,360
Speaker 1: my boy right there. Well you ain't lat It's like

696
00:52:50,440 --> 00:52:53,719
Speaker 1: marm will put your computer, Dirk, do you like Lamborghinis? No,

697
00:52:54,360 --> 00:52:58,200
Speaker 1: well we know what kind of cars you drive. But yeah,

698
00:52:58,320 --> 00:53:09,640
Speaker 1: but yeah, baby, well I'm Cadillac playing hard. I can't

699
00:53:09,760 --> 00:53:13,480
Speaker 1: never shook it, okay, Like like Pempen and Roscoe were

700
00:53:13,560 --> 00:53:16,000
Speaker 1: earlier Cadillac. When I was a little boy, we used

701
00:53:16,000 --> 00:53:18,840
Speaker 1: to play that's my car coming up. Cadillan came up

702
00:53:19,239 --> 00:53:21,440
Speaker 1: and I didn't. It wasn't my car. I fought you

703
00:53:21,560 --> 00:53:25,800
Speaker 1: for you got a thing for Cadillacs. Dog, I wanted

704
00:53:25,840 --> 00:53:32,040
Speaker 1: the Fleetwood brown fot go gold. I'm not he was

705
00:53:32,120 --> 00:53:38,279
Speaker 1: gonna say, like black gold. Well, I was gonna tell

706
00:53:38,320 --> 00:53:41,960
Speaker 1: you about Lamborghini there now in the business of selling smartphones.

707
00:53:42,560 --> 00:53:45,840
Speaker 1: Uh yeah, not content to just be in the exotic

708
00:53:45,920 --> 00:53:49,719
Speaker 1: car business. Um, they're getting into the smartphone business now.

709
00:53:50,840 --> 00:53:54,680
Speaker 1: The Lamborghini smartphone, which they're calling the Alpha One, is

710
00:53:54,840 --> 00:53:59,520
Speaker 1: encased in handmade Italian leather. It features a high five

711
00:53:59,560 --> 00:54:03,360
Speaker 1: and a half inch display and a twenty megapixel camera.

712
00:54:03,840 --> 00:54:07,120
Speaker 1: Just like Lamborghini cars. This thing is beautiful, it's fast,

713
00:54:07,440 --> 00:54:10,160
Speaker 1: and of course expensive. Any guesses on how much it

714
00:54:10,280 --> 00:54:19,920
Speaker 1: might be if it's a phone for from Lamborghini, it's no.

715
00:54:20,440 --> 00:54:28,520
Speaker 1: Two thousand, four fifty dollars will be. You're listening to

716
00:54:28,719 --> 00:54:32,719
Speaker 1: the Steve Harvey Morning Show. Today's Strawberry letter is up next,

717
00:54:32,840 --> 00:54:35,080
Speaker 1: and it's a good one. Let's get it. Let's get it.

718
00:54:35,120 --> 00:54:37,080
Speaker 1: Buckle up and hold on tight. We got it for you,

719
00:54:37,480 --> 00:54:41,120
Speaker 1: Strawberry letter. Thank you enough for your subject. He pays

720
00:54:41,280 --> 00:54:47,560
Speaker 1: me for my services, Dear Stephen, surely I've been married

721
00:54:47,640 --> 00:54:50,640
Speaker 1: for a year and I'm the breadwinner of my family.

722
00:54:51,120 --> 00:54:54,719
Speaker 1: We have a great lifestyle because of my income. My

723
00:54:54,880 --> 00:54:57,479
Speaker 1: husband works for a cable company and he gets paid

724
00:54:57,600 --> 00:55:01,239
Speaker 1: four hundred dollars a week, and that just takes care

725
00:55:01,320 --> 00:55:04,480
Speaker 1: of the car. Note. So let me tell you how

726
00:55:04,680 --> 00:55:09,000
Speaker 1: I'm the breadwinner. I'm seeing this older guy who pays

727
00:55:09,080 --> 00:55:12,280
Speaker 1: me to be his chaperone, clean his house, et cetera.

728
00:55:12,760 --> 00:55:14,920
Speaker 1: Oh and by the way, this guy pay for my

729
00:55:15,960 --> 00:55:19,680
Speaker 1: wedding a year ago. Yes, he knows about my husband,

730
00:55:19,760 --> 00:55:23,440
Speaker 1: but my husband does not know about him. My husband

731
00:55:23,480 --> 00:55:25,600
Speaker 1: thinks that I work at a law firm, and now

732
00:55:25,760 --> 00:55:28,600
Speaker 1: he's starting to ask questions about my job and want

733
00:55:29,280 --> 00:55:31,480
Speaker 1: to come pick me up for lunch one day soon.

734
00:55:31,640 --> 00:55:34,520
Speaker 1: What should I do? Should I come clean with my husband?

735
00:55:35,040 --> 00:55:38,960
Speaker 1: Please help me. I could see if this was in

736
00:55:39,080 --> 00:55:41,399
Speaker 1: your past, if you had done these things in your past,

737
00:55:41,480 --> 00:55:44,719
Speaker 1: But this is going on right in your marriage right now,

738
00:55:45,400 --> 00:55:49,799
Speaker 1: So you gotta come clean somehow with your husband. I mean,

739
00:55:49,840 --> 00:55:52,120
Speaker 1: you're gonna have to at some point. I just don't

740
00:55:52,239 --> 00:55:54,440
Speaker 1: know how you're going to keep this from your husband

741
00:55:54,440 --> 00:55:56,800
Speaker 1: if he wants to come and take you to lunch

742
00:55:56,840 --> 00:55:58,960
Speaker 1: and pick you up at the office and things like that.

743
00:55:59,600 --> 00:56:01,520
Speaker 1: I just don't see how you can lie your way

744
00:56:01,600 --> 00:56:06,200
Speaker 1: out of this. I will say this, don't tell him everything,

745
00:56:06,640 --> 00:56:10,520
Speaker 1: So come clean, but not all the way clean. Um.

746
00:56:11,000 --> 00:56:13,600
Speaker 1: I mean, this man is paying you for your services,

747
00:56:13,640 --> 00:56:15,640
Speaker 1: and I can only mean you know, think that you

748
00:56:15,760 --> 00:56:19,040
Speaker 1: mean sexual services. I think your husband is getting a

749
00:56:19,080 --> 00:56:21,920
Speaker 1: bit suspicious. What are you doing around the house or

750
00:56:21,960 --> 00:56:24,560
Speaker 1: what are you doing differently now? So he's getting a

751
00:56:24,560 --> 00:56:27,040
Speaker 1: little suspicious. He wants to know what you're doing, or

752
00:56:27,160 --> 00:56:30,239
Speaker 1: somebody said something. So I say to you, you got

753
00:56:30,360 --> 00:56:32,640
Speaker 1: to tell your husband something. You have to. I mean,

754
00:56:32,719 --> 00:56:35,440
Speaker 1: this is crazy. You've been married a whole year and

755
00:56:35,560 --> 00:56:38,000
Speaker 1: you're keeping this big life from him, especially if it's

756
00:56:38,040 --> 00:56:41,040
Speaker 1: sexual services, and you need to stop that immediately. So

757
00:56:41,239 --> 00:56:45,040
Speaker 1: tell your husband that you work for a man. Don't

758
00:56:45,080 --> 00:56:50,320
Speaker 1: tell him everything that you're giving him sexual services. Steve, surely,

759
00:56:50,360 --> 00:56:54,920
Speaker 1: I don't know what letter you read. Now, where is

760
00:56:55,080 --> 00:56:58,160
Speaker 1: services in this letter? Where did I'm missing? It's in

761
00:56:58,320 --> 00:57:02,400
Speaker 1: the title he pays me for his services for praise

762
00:57:02,560 --> 00:57:06,279
Speaker 1: me for myself my sers. Now did we write the

763
00:57:06,400 --> 00:57:10,879
Speaker 1: subject of this letter? Because in the letter I see

764
00:57:11,000 --> 00:57:14,200
Speaker 1: something else and I tell you what I mean. No,

765
00:57:14,440 --> 00:57:16,880
Speaker 1: we didn't write the subject. She did. This is her

766
00:57:18,360 --> 00:57:23,000
Speaker 1: for my services? See here in the letter here problems.

767
00:57:23,280 --> 00:57:25,560
Speaker 1: First of all, let's just start with cable board making

768
00:57:25,600 --> 00:57:31,800
Speaker 1: four hunt a week. Just pay the car. That's where

769
00:57:31,880 --> 00:57:36,439
Speaker 1: the damn problem right there. Cable boy pulling in full

770
00:57:36,560 --> 00:57:42,320
Speaker 1: hunted and just paying the car. No, this ain't the rid.

771
00:57:44,040 --> 00:57:51,480
Speaker 1: This ain't you know, groceries, the Saint Al heating say, electricity,

772
00:57:53,200 --> 00:57:58,840
Speaker 1: this ain't gas, This is no clothing. This is the

773
00:57:59,000 --> 00:58:04,920
Speaker 1: problem right here. See this foul hunted. They call that

774
00:58:05,040 --> 00:58:10,320
Speaker 1: college student money. Now ful hunted. If you're want to

775
00:58:10,400 --> 00:58:13,560
Speaker 1: come up, I understand I ain't knocking it at all,

776
00:58:14,160 --> 00:58:16,760
Speaker 1: but the full hunted creating the problem for you because

777
00:58:16,760 --> 00:58:18,560
Speaker 1: you knew when you got married you didn't want the

778
00:58:18,640 --> 00:58:26,520
Speaker 1: full hunted. So now cable boy is the problem. My

779
00:58:26,800 --> 00:58:29,200
Speaker 1: husband worked for a cable company. He gets four hundred

780
00:58:29,240 --> 00:58:31,560
Speaker 1: week and they just take care of cardor So now

781
00:58:32,280 --> 00:58:37,160
Speaker 1: let me tell you how I'm the breadwinner. I'm seeing

782
00:58:37,280 --> 00:58:42,000
Speaker 1: this older guy. Let's stop right there, older guy. Yeah,

783
00:58:43,000 --> 00:58:47,200
Speaker 1: what does older guy stand for? It stands for sugar

784
00:58:47,280 --> 00:58:54,960
Speaker 1: dad who pays me to be his chaperone. This ain't

785
00:58:55,000 --> 00:59:07,720
Speaker 1: the problem, wad and Bible summer school chaperon? Mm hmmm.

786
00:59:08,800 --> 00:59:11,480
Speaker 1: Where do he need help getting too? Or how old

787
00:59:11,680 --> 00:59:20,120
Speaker 1: is here? You? Nursing him chaperone is a deceptive turn.

788
00:59:21,560 --> 00:59:26,680
Speaker 1: Then she says, comma clean his house? Mm hmm, Then

789
00:59:26,920 --> 00:59:35,680
Speaker 1: comma e tc. Etcetera. Yeah, that's where we must come

790
00:59:35,760 --> 00:59:40,560
Speaker 1: to terms with what you're doing. It's the etcetera that's

791
00:59:40,640 --> 00:59:45,000
Speaker 1: getting the money chaperone and don't really pay it, don't

792
00:59:45,000 --> 00:59:49,760
Speaker 1: pay it up. How is cleaning limited house? Cleaning you

793
00:59:49,920 --> 00:59:53,880
Speaker 1: down with your same money? Cable board naking? All you

794
00:59:53,960 --> 00:59:57,600
Speaker 1: over they're doing is cleaning house, But you're cleaning molt

795
00:59:57,720 --> 01:00:04,440
Speaker 1: in the house. M you are all up in cracks, crannics.

796
01:00:04,560 --> 01:00:12,760
Speaker 1: C Yeah, that's the type of cleaning you're doing. And oh,

797
01:00:12,880 --> 01:00:15,760
Speaker 1: by the way, this guy paid for my wedding a

798
01:00:15,880 --> 01:00:19,320
Speaker 1: year ago. Let me tell you so, I'm a father

799
01:00:19,440 --> 01:00:22,760
Speaker 1: with four daughters. I didn't pay for two winds. I

800
01:00:22,880 --> 01:00:26,080
Speaker 1: know how much winds. Cause now for this older man

801
01:00:26,320 --> 01:00:29,200
Speaker 1: to have you chaperon and cleaning the house and et cetera,

802
01:00:29,520 --> 01:00:32,680
Speaker 1: and paying for winds, do you know the monkey flips

803
01:00:32,760 --> 01:00:37,240
Speaker 1: that you're in there doing. You guys to be in

804
01:00:37,480 --> 01:00:42,320
Speaker 1: there doing some things naked that can't be printed. That's

805
01:00:42,360 --> 01:00:47,600
Speaker 1: why this led us so damn show. And then come

806
01:00:47,640 --> 01:00:49,800
Speaker 1: talking about yes he knows about my husband. You just

807
01:00:49,880 --> 01:00:53,000
Speaker 1: said he paid for the wind. He said, trying to

808
01:00:53,080 --> 01:00:58,440
Speaker 1: throw us off with your letter, and you just hain't

809
01:00:58,440 --> 01:01:01,800
Speaker 1: paid for the wind. You don't try to throw us

810
01:01:01,880 --> 01:01:04,520
Speaker 1: off of what you do. Let's get back to this etc.

811
01:01:04,800 --> 01:01:11,919
Speaker 1: Because that's what this let about, so etcetera. What is etcetera? Well,

812
01:01:12,040 --> 01:01:17,000
Speaker 1: let's explore the word E. E stands for extra. You're

813
01:01:17,040 --> 01:01:22,280
Speaker 1: doing way mode and cleaning house lady. You're doing way

814
01:01:23,000 --> 01:01:29,160
Speaker 1: way mode and chapeloon. You're doing extra. What does the

815
01:01:29,320 --> 01:01:43,360
Speaker 1: T me too? You're doing all this to him extra too?

816
01:01:43,840 --> 01:01:47,200
Speaker 1: And dn C E t C you're doing all this

817
01:01:47,400 --> 01:01:50,880
Speaker 1: extra to him to get him to do what? What?

818
01:01:51,920 --> 01:02:01,000
Speaker 1: What Cash? Think about it? Cash? I'll be back with

819
01:02:01,200 --> 01:02:03,560
Speaker 1: the second half and exposed to you. What to see

820
01:02:03,720 --> 01:02:10,800
Speaker 1: is okay, you're listening to the Steven Show. All right, Steve,

821
01:02:11,160 --> 01:02:14,880
Speaker 1: this letter, uh strawberry letter. Today's subject he pays me

822
01:02:15,360 --> 01:02:22,200
Speaker 1: for my services. Uh. I think everybody got to see

823
01:02:22,240 --> 01:02:25,400
Speaker 1: this letter for what it is. What is that I

824
01:02:25,520 --> 01:02:28,800
Speaker 1: thought I did? Well? You know I didn't say you

825
01:02:28,920 --> 01:02:32,800
Speaker 1: didn't shill, I said everybody needs to see this letter

826
01:02:32,920 --> 01:02:40,919
Speaker 1: for what it is. First of all, lose the attitude. Yeah,

827
01:02:41,160 --> 01:02:43,120
Speaker 1: you know you do your hand for the letter. You

828
01:02:43,280 --> 01:02:48,240
Speaker 1: food exactly? What is yourway being sensitive about my side

829
01:02:48,320 --> 01:02:51,360
Speaker 1: of the letter. I don't know when you were talking.

830
01:02:52,040 --> 01:02:56,720
Speaker 1: Right now, listen to me. This older man didn't pay.

831
01:02:56,960 --> 01:03:00,840
Speaker 1: This woman was win right, she's saying here, what they're

832
01:03:00,880 --> 01:03:06,560
Speaker 1: doing chores, cleaning down, chaperon, don't know what the hell

833
01:03:06,640 --> 01:03:10,640
Speaker 1: let mean? We ain't kids. M and E T C

834
01:03:11,720 --> 01:03:19,480
Speaker 1: mm hmmm. E stands for extra. Yeah, that's more than

835
01:03:19,600 --> 01:03:27,440
Speaker 1: anybody else. That's above and beyond what anybody else would do.

836
01:03:27,760 --> 01:03:33,680
Speaker 1: Think or won't you coming there with extra? That's the

837
01:03:33,840 --> 01:03:38,440
Speaker 1: E N extra M E T C is the acronym

838
01:03:38,640 --> 01:03:44,240
Speaker 1: stands for extra. T is too. You do the extra

839
01:03:44,720 --> 01:03:53,480
Speaker 1: to him. That's my favorite. Now the C. You do

840
01:03:53,680 --> 01:03:57,160
Speaker 1: all this extra to him to get him to what?

841
01:03:58,640 --> 01:04:05,680
Speaker 1: That's what the see? Yeah, see all that E T

842
01:04:05,960 --> 01:04:12,959
Speaker 1: C is all that extra to get him to what? Okay, Yeah,

843
01:04:13,920 --> 01:04:17,960
Speaker 1: come come on now, come here, come here, come on,

844
01:04:19,480 --> 01:04:27,440
Speaker 1: come with it. Communicate, communicate wire little Yeah, that's the

845
01:04:27,560 --> 01:04:32,240
Speaker 1: E T C. Come up, Yeah, come up a deal,

846
01:04:32,960 --> 01:04:41,200
Speaker 1: come out, come out, yeah, come out. Now. My husband

847
01:04:41,280 --> 01:04:43,640
Speaker 1: thinks I work at a law firm, and now he's

848
01:04:43,680 --> 01:04:46,560
Speaker 1: starting to ask questions about my job and wants to

849
01:04:46,640 --> 01:04:48,960
Speaker 1: come pick me up for lunch one day soon. Well,

850
01:04:49,000 --> 01:04:53,360
Speaker 1: won't he be surprised? Yeah, when he put up at

851
01:04:53,400 --> 01:04:59,479
Speaker 1: this old man house. Yeah, and you and it ain't

852
01:04:59,520 --> 01:05:04,800
Speaker 1: exactly dressed like a lawyer, but years going over his breefs.

853
01:05:11,240 --> 01:05:15,960
Speaker 1: What should I do? Should I come clean with my husband?

854
01:05:16,040 --> 01:05:23,160
Speaker 1: Please help me, lady, come clean. You won't have a

855
01:05:23,400 --> 01:05:27,920
Speaker 1: marriage anymore. You got to do what all men would do,

856
01:05:28,120 --> 01:05:31,800
Speaker 1: all real men in this situation, because ladies, I wrote

857
01:05:31,840 --> 01:05:33,760
Speaker 1: the book. Act like a lady, think like a man.

858
01:05:34,400 --> 01:05:36,800
Speaker 1: Now is your opportunity to do the one thing that

859
01:05:36,920 --> 01:05:41,360
Speaker 1: all men would do. Lie yes, just as you have

860
01:05:41,600 --> 01:05:45,560
Speaker 1: lied before. See rule number one to line. Ride your

861
01:05:45,720 --> 01:05:51,280
Speaker 1: lie all the way out. Don't shoot, Let no by

862
01:05:51,520 --> 01:05:54,680
Speaker 1: d talk you off that lie. You work at a

863
01:05:54,800 --> 01:05:58,720
Speaker 1: law firm and you are the assistant to the head

864
01:05:58,840 --> 01:06:03,720
Speaker 1: of the law firm. Mm hmmm. Hold it, and y'all

865
01:06:03,800 --> 01:06:05,960
Speaker 1: working from the house that day. He want to take

866
01:06:06,000 --> 01:06:11,080
Speaker 1: you to lunch. Mm hmmm. That's it. Now, you got

867
01:06:11,200 --> 01:06:13,880
Speaker 1: to go out and get yourself some business cards printed up.

868
01:06:14,960 --> 01:06:17,720
Speaker 1: You gotta install a fake line at the man's house.

869
01:06:18,560 --> 01:06:23,080
Speaker 1: We need a brief gase. Yes, you gotta get some horn,

870
01:06:23,160 --> 01:06:27,520
Speaker 1: real blastes with a chain on, and you got to

871
01:06:27,520 --> 01:06:30,480
Speaker 1: start playing the role. What you can't do is tell

872
01:06:30,600 --> 01:06:34,320
Speaker 1: his young boy that you've been in there serving this etc.

873
01:06:34,600 --> 01:06:37,280
Speaker 1: And this old man, because it ain't gonna go. Good

874
01:06:37,880 --> 01:06:41,040
Speaker 1: ladies and gentlemen. That is my response to the letter.

875
01:06:41,680 --> 01:06:44,720
Speaker 1: And the next time you write me with the word etc.

876
01:06:45,080 --> 01:06:50,040
Speaker 1: And that you're gonna gets it from now, just n

877
01:06:51,680 --> 01:06:56,400
Speaker 1: don't eat. You don't want me to assume that you

878
01:06:56,560 --> 01:07:04,200
Speaker 1: tricking spell it out actually won't something? You know alright,

879
01:07:08,480 --> 01:07:11,840
Speaker 1: Neiman Marcus reveals annual Christmas book. You know they do

880
01:07:12,000 --> 01:07:15,160
Speaker 1: that every year. Each year since nineteen six, Name and

881
01:07:15,200 --> 01:07:18,960
Speaker 1: Marcus releases their annual Christmas Book, which includes their infamous

882
01:07:19,120 --> 01:07:23,200
Speaker 1: fantasy gifts, which are out of reach for most normal people. Okay,

883
01:07:24,880 --> 01:07:27,040
Speaker 1: I just got to say that because it's for one

884
01:07:27,080 --> 01:07:39,920
Speaker 1: person on this show. Okay, what they got? Let's see, Well,

885
01:07:40,000 --> 01:07:42,240
Speaker 1: the Lagus position is out now, and this year is

886
01:07:42,280 --> 01:07:45,800
Speaker 1: no exception among the crazier items on the fantasy list.

887
01:07:46,520 --> 01:07:50,080
Speaker 1: Along with your huge price tags, a private New Year's

888
01:07:50,160 --> 01:07:53,800
Speaker 1: Eve party for three hundred people at the Knickerbocker Hotel

889
01:07:54,200 --> 01:07:58,160
Speaker 1: in Times Square for a million, six hundred thousand dollars

890
01:08:00,160 --> 01:08:02,520
Speaker 1: point six. I don't like the name of that hotel,

891
01:08:02,840 --> 01:08:11,680
Speaker 1: that's the Nicker I don't get drunk. Yeah, okay, but

892
01:08:11,800 --> 01:08:14,960
Speaker 1: what comes with that, Well, you get a party for

893
01:08:15,040 --> 01:08:17,880
Speaker 1: three hundred people that's a lot of people. That's a lot.

894
01:08:18,479 --> 01:08:21,040
Speaker 1: I was at a house party. I know it wouldn't

895
01:08:21,160 --> 01:08:27,400
Speaker 1: sent me to the It was people. Well yeah, I know,

896
01:08:28,360 --> 01:08:30,920
Speaker 1: good part we First of all, it wasn't looking in there.

897
01:08:31,479 --> 01:08:36,120
Speaker 1: It was just I know this. You're listening to Steve

898
01:08:36,280 --> 01:08:40,120
Speaker 1: Harvey Morning Show. All right, here we go. This segment

899
01:08:40,280 --> 01:08:42,760
Speaker 1: is called things you say to yourself to keep you

900
01:08:43,160 --> 01:08:49,599
Speaker 1: from flapping the beep out of someone anyway you need

901
01:08:50,640 --> 01:08:54,080
Speaker 1: you need to know things that can calm your nerves.

902
01:08:55,400 --> 01:08:58,000
Speaker 1: That's what a lot of people don't know. You need calm.

903
01:08:58,080 --> 01:09:01,200
Speaker 1: And now all this ain't for everybody, but I'm sure

904
01:09:01,320 --> 01:09:03,439
Speaker 1: out of the tea in a sod that I'm gonna list,

905
01:09:04,120 --> 01:09:08,040
Speaker 1: you can come up with something that fits you. These

906
01:09:08,080 --> 01:09:10,479
Speaker 1: are just I'm gonna just give you some little who

907
01:09:10,600 --> 01:09:13,799
Speaker 1: saw moments that you can kind of say to yourself

908
01:09:13,880 --> 01:09:17,680
Speaker 1: to cleep from slapping the sugar honey iced tea out

909
01:09:17,760 --> 01:09:22,439
Speaker 1: of somebody. Down on your damn job. You'll be wanting

910
01:09:22,560 --> 01:09:26,080
Speaker 1: to These are some things you can say to yourself

911
01:09:27,240 --> 01:09:30,599
Speaker 1: to just keep you from slapping them and then losing

912
01:09:30,640 --> 01:09:35,000
Speaker 1: your job. You're gonna just go down the list created

913
01:09:35,280 --> 01:09:38,360
Speaker 1: you say these to yourself. I got two kids in college.

914
01:09:39,479 --> 01:09:48,160
Speaker 1: Yeah you need that kids. Here got another one right here,

915
01:09:49,120 --> 01:09:59,760
Speaker 1: already got two strikes on for life. Here's another you

916
01:09:59,800 --> 01:10:03,360
Speaker 1: can he was right here. Oh, I just got this job. Yeah,

917
01:10:08,320 --> 01:10:09,880
Speaker 1: I just got the shot, and I was got to

918
01:10:09,880 --> 01:10:14,800
Speaker 1: work for eight months. I just got this job. But

919
01:10:14,920 --> 01:10:17,400
Speaker 1: he got about one more time to say something one

920
01:10:17,479 --> 01:10:22,600
Speaker 1: more time and I'm gonna slap to sugar honey. But

921
01:10:24,040 --> 01:10:29,679
Speaker 1: I just got the job. Yeah. Oh, I'm closer with time,

922
01:10:29,760 --> 01:10:33,280
Speaker 1: and I ain't. I got one more year in his

923
01:10:33,439 --> 01:10:39,200
Speaker 1: ring and play. In one year, you're gonna get a pension. Turkey.

924
01:10:39,280 --> 01:10:43,240
Speaker 1: Go watch just hanging there, man, nothing, watch the turkey.

925
01:10:43,520 --> 01:10:50,679
Speaker 1: Here's another one right here. Let it go from frozen

926
01:10:55,000 --> 01:10:59,120
Speaker 1: yet here go another one right here for a lot

927
01:10:59,160 --> 01:11:00,720
Speaker 1: of y'all. And I'm gonn just go and sit in

928
01:11:00,800 --> 01:11:06,519
Speaker 1: my car smoking, Joey, I'm gonna just go sit in

929
01:11:06,600 --> 01:11:10,800
Speaker 1: my car smoking everywhere. I know it's not legal, but

930
01:11:10,840 --> 01:11:13,680
Speaker 1: you're just trying to keep your job because I tell

931
01:11:13,680 --> 01:11:16,200
Speaker 1: you what ain't legal. You slap the sugar honey iced tea.

932
01:11:17,040 --> 01:11:21,639
Speaker 1: Sugar scares me every time you say every time. Yeah,

933
01:11:21,760 --> 01:11:32,760
Speaker 1: come on, just sing a song to yourself, or you

934
01:11:32,800 --> 01:11:37,080
Speaker 1: can just try to nothing but the blood, the blood

935
01:11:38,280 --> 01:11:46,200
Speaker 1: a man, or just make up yourself. Hold my hand,

936
01:11:47,000 --> 01:11:54,120
Speaker 1: put them deep into my pocket. My hand put them

937
01:11:54,280 --> 01:12:01,599
Speaker 1: deep into my pocket. My hand put them deep into

938
01:12:01,960 --> 01:12:10,720
Speaker 1: my pockets. For slap the sugar honey iced tea, the

939
01:12:10,840 --> 01:12:13,479
Speaker 1: same melody as do you know the butterfly? But I

940
01:12:13,600 --> 01:12:16,720
Speaker 1: like it? Yeah, here's the one that to keep you

941
01:12:16,800 --> 01:12:19,519
Speaker 1: from slapping the sugar honey iced tea out of into

942
01:12:20,400 --> 01:12:29,840
Speaker 1: Lord knows, I can't go back to jail. I can't

943
01:12:29,880 --> 01:12:32,640
Speaker 1: go back to jail. Then. I just couldn't stand it

944
01:12:32,720 --> 01:12:37,479
Speaker 1: down there. I just couldn't not stand it down then, Lord,

945
01:12:37,600 --> 01:12:40,400
Speaker 1: I can't go back to jail. Oh, but I want

946
01:12:40,479 --> 01:12:46,960
Speaker 1: to do something. I beat and done something. I'm sorry

947
01:12:48,360 --> 01:12:52,559
Speaker 1: you on the show, but I can't go back to jail.

948
01:12:54,040 --> 01:12:58,720
Speaker 1: Or realization right there saying so those are things that

949
01:12:58,880 --> 01:13:01,519
Speaker 1: you can use on you. You can say to yourself

950
01:13:01,760 --> 01:13:04,080
Speaker 1: if you from slapping the sugar honey iced tea, are

951
01:13:04,240 --> 01:13:09,360
Speaker 1: your coworker? Let it go all right. A bear takes

952
01:13:09,439 --> 01:13:13,599
Speaker 1: an suv and leaves calling card. Bear caused a lot

953
01:13:13,760 --> 01:13:17,160
Speaker 1: of chaos by breaking into an suv. Not only did

954
01:13:17,200 --> 01:13:19,560
Speaker 1: the bear get into the vehicle, but he drove it

955
01:13:19,800 --> 01:13:23,000
Speaker 1: until it crashed into a neighbor's mailbox. As a bonus,

956
01:13:23,080 --> 01:13:26,160
Speaker 1: he ripped out the radio and the steering wheel, rubbed

957
01:13:26,240 --> 01:13:29,080
Speaker 1: the back window, and trashed the interior. All of this

958
01:13:29,240 --> 01:13:32,519
Speaker 1: happened in minutes, and last, but not least, the bear

959
01:13:32,680 --> 01:13:53,519
Speaker 1: pooped by accident. The family purpose notice. He look, he

960
01:13:53,640 --> 01:13:55,639
Speaker 1: had been coming down there for a couple of years,

961
01:13:55,720 --> 01:13:59,120
Speaker 1: eating out the trade. Then they're gonna get a bad

962
01:13:59,240 --> 01:14:03,880
Speaker 1: lot put on. They've been coming to him two years,

963
01:14:04,960 --> 01:14:07,840
Speaker 1: come down for dinner evening. They're gonna put a bad

964
01:14:07,920 --> 01:14:12,679
Speaker 1: lock on their trash. He just gonna they're gonna close

965
01:14:12,720 --> 01:14:17,080
Speaker 1: the restaurant. Don't notify him. I said, all right, I'll

966
01:14:17,120 --> 01:14:21,320
Speaker 1: tell you what. I'm gonna breaking this damn truck. Yeah,

967
01:14:21,720 --> 01:14:23,920
Speaker 1: I'm gonna tell the radio I have to stay. I'm

968
01:14:23,920 --> 01:14:26,160
Speaker 1: gonna rip up all the cushions. I'm gonna break all

969
01:14:26,240 --> 01:14:30,400
Speaker 1: the windows in it. And before I leave. Yeah, sugar

970
01:14:30,560 --> 01:14:36,360
Speaker 1: honey iced tea, y'all, sugar honey iced tea all over

971
01:14:36,439 --> 01:14:40,640
Speaker 1: the When he got to the trash care with the

972
01:14:40,680 --> 01:14:44,200
Speaker 1: bad lock, what happen here? Walking up to dude to do? Dude?

973
01:14:54,479 --> 01:14:59,400
Speaker 1: The back said, So he went on back up in

974
01:14:59,479 --> 01:15:02,639
Speaker 1: the hill and he was sitting there. So it's finally go. Man,

975
01:15:02,760 --> 01:15:06,120
Speaker 1: you enjoying your done the last night? So man, you

976
01:15:06,160 --> 01:15:11,280
Speaker 1: ain't go down to the Harper's placing me go whatever

977
01:15:14,560 --> 01:15:19,040
Speaker 1: what they put They put a bell lock on it

978
01:15:19,160 --> 01:15:22,680
Speaker 1: and lotch out this the other bed. That's awful. They

979
01:15:22,760 --> 01:15:25,080
Speaker 1: just used and abuse you. What are you gonna do

980
01:15:25,160 --> 01:15:27,920
Speaker 1: about it? I'll show you on going down here tomorrow.

981
01:15:29,200 --> 01:15:37,560
Speaker 1: Do dude. Oh here they left to hear you be

982
01:15:37,680 --> 01:15:41,400
Speaker 1: doing it? Ain't nothing to he didn't hear you. Let

983
01:15:41,439 --> 01:15:45,559
Speaker 1: me go on, teddy damn seats up right here going

984
01:15:45,680 --> 01:15:48,160
Speaker 1: down and down. Were only want a lot of him?

985
01:15:48,479 --> 01:15:51,200
Speaker 1: How you like me now? I'm dropping to drive running

986
01:15:51,240 --> 01:16:02,880
Speaker 1: into the mailbox, but only wanted the hold on? What

987
01:16:03,320 --> 01:16:10,760
Speaker 1: is you're listening to Steve Harvey Morning Show? All right,

988
01:16:10,840 --> 01:16:15,160
Speaker 1: ladies and gentlemen, it is that time, junior. You're ready? Absolutely?

989
01:16:15,400 --> 01:16:24,760
Speaker 1: Is everybody ready? Yes, I'm a rough room coming in.

990
01:16:25,920 --> 01:16:31,760
Speaker 1: It's time. Let me just tell y'all something here. I

991
01:16:31,960 --> 01:16:36,280
Speaker 1: was I'm doing something different this week because I'm growing

992
01:16:36,320 --> 01:16:39,960
Speaker 1: as an artist, and so I saw something good. I

993
01:16:40,000 --> 01:16:45,080
Speaker 1: saw something definitely traumatic go on, and it changed my

994
01:16:45,200 --> 01:16:48,760
Speaker 1: thought process. I saw some coffee wasted Starbucks and it

995
01:16:48,920 --> 01:16:52,880
Speaker 1: decided pushed me actually into writing limits. So you're not

996
01:16:52,960 --> 01:16:57,080
Speaker 1: doing poems, no, No, this is limericks. Hit said I

997
01:16:57,120 --> 01:17:01,760
Speaker 1: need to be doing limits and I did. Yeah, yea.

998
01:17:01,840 --> 01:17:03,280
Speaker 1: And for those out that they don't know what limerick

999
01:17:03,400 --> 01:17:06,960
Speaker 1: is a limerick, it's just a short story about an individual.

1000
01:17:07,439 --> 01:17:17,840
Speaker 1: It's real quick weeks. So I changed over limericks and

1001
01:17:17,920 --> 01:17:20,280
Speaker 1: I just found like the growth, thank you, thank you,

1002
01:17:20,800 --> 01:17:23,240
Speaker 1: And so I just wrote some limrics about shure to you, Jay,

1003
01:17:23,640 --> 01:17:27,599
Speaker 1: Tommy and Carla. Yeah, I just because I know y'all.

1004
01:17:29,720 --> 01:17:32,840
Speaker 1: Ye let me start with Tommy. The limerick about Tommy.

1005
01:17:34,000 --> 01:17:37,960
Speaker 1: There once was a man name Tommy who walked around

1006
01:17:38,200 --> 01:17:42,040
Speaker 1: in nice silk put jammies. He was quick to get

1007
01:17:42,120 --> 01:17:45,120
Speaker 1: mad and then turned back land. Oh Tommy is like

1008
01:17:45,200 --> 01:17:59,000
Speaker 1: a suave Okay, that's the truth. And I like to

1009
01:17:59,080 --> 01:18:02,519
Speaker 1: do one about my good friend j Anthony Brown. Grown

1010
01:18:02,600 --> 01:18:04,759
Speaker 1: to know Jay working with Jay on a daily basis,

1011
01:18:05,000 --> 01:18:08,400
Speaker 1: I've grown the norm and this is what I found out. Okay.

1012
01:18:10,360 --> 01:18:14,840
Speaker 1: There once was a man named Jake who had diabetes

1013
01:18:15,000 --> 01:18:19,200
Speaker 1: that would not go away. He could not eat sweets,

1014
01:18:19,640 --> 01:18:36,519
Speaker 1: but he might lose his seats. But Steve this one

1015
01:18:36,640 --> 01:18:40,920
Speaker 1: by Carlor that I do this one like that. I

1016
01:18:41,040 --> 01:18:45,240
Speaker 1: love my faith. There was was a lady named Carlor

1017
01:18:46,240 --> 01:18:49,599
Speaker 1: on the Steve Show. She is the baller. She keeps

1018
01:18:49,640 --> 01:18:53,960
Speaker 1: it so straight and well up to date color sometimes

1019
01:18:54,080 --> 01:19:02,800
Speaker 1: like hollo, I to everybody's been waiting on this. This

1020
01:19:02,880 --> 01:19:07,400
Speaker 1: is what I've been waiting to do. Shirley. Oh, Shirley,

1021
01:19:07,880 --> 01:19:10,559
Speaker 1: and I love you, says, I really do. You probably

1022
01:19:10,560 --> 01:19:16,080
Speaker 1: will pick the crossbo There once was a lady named Shirley.

1023
01:19:17,160 --> 01:19:21,000
Speaker 1: She is real boogie and girly. She keep Steve real

1024
01:19:21,080 --> 01:19:24,439
Speaker 1: straight and she loves her mate. But Shirley, don't come

1025
01:19:24,560 --> 01:19:40,040
Speaker 1: into earth. Those are again. There's what was a man

1026
01:19:40,160 --> 01:19:44,960
Speaker 1: named Timmy who walked around and silk pajohnny. He was

1027
01:19:45,080 --> 01:19:48,519
Speaker 1: quick to get mad and then turned back glad. Oh Timmy,

1028
01:19:48,600 --> 01:19:54,599
Speaker 1: like I said, no, we don't know what listening again?

1029
01:19:55,680 --> 01:20:01,559
Speaker 1: Who a day, y'all? That's just it, uh huh. Right

1030
01:20:02,439 --> 01:20:05,280
Speaker 1: now we're gonna go from Junior's limits that were that

1031
01:20:05,360 --> 01:20:11,479
Speaker 1: were very good, Steve with explain your segments Steve these

1032
01:20:11,640 --> 01:20:14,080
Speaker 1: this and I'm gonna do is you know things that

1033
01:20:14,400 --> 01:20:18,840
Speaker 1: that's code for. There are things people say and you

1034
01:20:18,960 --> 01:20:21,040
Speaker 1: got to know how to read what they're saying. Because

1035
01:20:21,080 --> 01:20:24,000
Speaker 1: it's really a code. You know, they say one thing,

1036
01:20:24,080 --> 01:20:26,960
Speaker 1: but what it really means. So I'm gonna call this

1037
01:20:27,200 --> 01:20:34,679
Speaker 1: this segment is called code cracking. Yeah you've always been Yeah, alright,

1038
01:20:35,000 --> 01:20:39,240
Speaker 1: So Sureley, could you do me a favor? Yes? Do

1039
01:20:39,360 --> 01:20:44,360
Speaker 1: you have one of these? I do? Uh, you say

1040
01:20:44,439 --> 01:20:48,280
Speaker 1: the first line and you crack. Okay, like if the

1041
01:20:48,400 --> 01:21:04,040
Speaker 1: person says I'm in between jobs work especially take No,

1042
01:21:04,439 --> 01:21:08,080
Speaker 1: I don't know. Here's another one, Steve, I don't really

1043
01:21:08,120 --> 01:21:24,400
Speaker 1: watch TV that. You don't watch football, you watch power

1044
01:21:24,640 --> 01:21:27,920
Speaker 1: Yeah alright, I know about this one. When you hear

1045
01:21:27,960 --> 01:21:35,880
Speaker 1: a lady say this is my favorite person. Been there

1046
01:21:39,840 --> 01:21:49,880
Speaker 1: that my favorite favorite? This one, Steve, we've decided to

1047
01:21:49,960 --> 01:21:55,840
Speaker 1: see other people? Yeah, yeah, he just walked out, walked

1048
01:21:56,000 --> 01:22:02,560
Speaker 1: right out. He you just got the memo about we

1049
01:22:02,760 --> 01:22:07,599
Speaker 1: decided he'd been seeing somebody else. Okay, here goes one.

1050
01:22:08,920 --> 01:22:11,760
Speaker 1: I don't really like a lot of company. They stay

1051
01:22:11,800 --> 01:22:21,080
Speaker 1: with mom. You know, I just tried to take as

1052
01:22:21,160 --> 01:22:25,640
Speaker 1: quick as I can. Okay, Um, Yeah, I like to

1053
01:22:25,720 --> 01:22:27,840
Speaker 1: take walks, you know, because when you take walks, you

1054
01:22:27,840 --> 01:22:29,639
Speaker 1: get to see him. He ain't got no damn call.

1055
01:22:33,080 --> 01:22:39,479
Speaker 1: How you like to walk downtown? Who the hell likes

1056
01:22:39,560 --> 01:22:46,479
Speaker 1: to walk down town. Okay, how about this one. Uh,

1057
01:22:47,000 --> 01:22:51,080
Speaker 1: they're tripping down at my job. They tripping down at

1058
01:22:51,120 --> 01:23:03,920
Speaker 1: my job. You got fired? Yeah, all right, you want

1059
01:23:03,960 --> 01:23:06,120
Speaker 1: to Okay, we gotta go. That was good though, Steve

1060
01:23:06,439 --> 01:23:21,559
Speaker 1: was really good that. Okay, we'll be back. You're listening

1061
01:23:21,840 --> 01:23:25,080
Speaker 1: to Steve Harvey Morning Show. All right, it is time

1062
01:23:25,160 --> 01:23:29,880
Speaker 1: now for comedy roulette. Steve Jay, please please quickly set this.

1063
01:23:30,120 --> 01:23:34,639
Speaker 1: Every week our comedy ability is tested. Put five subjects

1064
01:23:34,680 --> 01:23:37,000
Speaker 1: on the wheel, spinning wheel, where stop? We got it.

1065
01:23:37,160 --> 01:23:39,439
Speaker 1: That's all it is. That's all it is comedy. Let

1066
01:23:39,560 --> 01:23:41,840
Speaker 1: you go. All right, here are the five subjects. Number

1067
01:23:41,880 --> 01:23:48,439
Speaker 1: one fish grease. Number two he wasn't that big in

1068
01:23:48,560 --> 01:23:53,040
Speaker 1: high school. Okay. Number three tastes like chicken. Number four,

1069
01:23:53,240 --> 01:23:55,080
Speaker 1: now that I have a little money, you know who

1070
01:23:55,200 --> 01:23:57,840
Speaker 1: I am? And number five, I don't know how you

1071
01:23:57,920 --> 01:24:03,519
Speaker 1: could eat that. You're right ahead, alright ahead, all right,

1072
01:24:03,600 --> 01:24:12,280
Speaker 1: let's go spend the whale cat. Oh, now that I

1073
01:24:12,400 --> 01:24:16,400
Speaker 1: have a little money, you know who I am? Let

1074
01:24:16,479 --> 01:24:19,320
Speaker 1: me have that. Let me start. See back in the day,

1075
01:24:19,479 --> 01:24:23,439
Speaker 1: my nickname was Fish. Didn't nobody no fish. I didn't

1076
01:24:23,439 --> 01:24:27,960
Speaker 1: speak to fish. You're too fine to speak to fish,

1077
01:24:28,600 --> 01:24:35,479
Speaker 1: but now that fishes on eavy. Hey, how you doing fish?

1078
01:24:36,960 --> 01:24:38,960
Speaker 1: I went way out of my league. You would drop

1079
01:24:39,240 --> 01:24:43,040
Speaker 1: dead fine to me. I beg for it. I used

1080
01:24:43,040 --> 01:24:45,800
Speaker 1: to ask for a day and night. You never gave

1081
01:24:45,920 --> 01:24:49,439
Speaker 1: me the time of day. But now now I got

1082
01:24:49,479 --> 01:24:52,080
Speaker 1: a little money. I'm on the Steve Harvey Mortis, you're

1083
01:24:52,240 --> 01:24:55,599
Speaker 1: you're texting me now, I can have it if I wanted.

1084
01:24:55,680 --> 01:24:58,560
Speaker 1: I don't want it now I don't want it. You

1085
01:24:58,640 --> 01:25:00,400
Speaker 1: know whatnot? I got a little money. Know who know

1086
01:25:00,560 --> 01:25:05,640
Speaker 1: my name being collected? They know who they're talking to now.

1087
01:25:06,240 --> 01:25:08,320
Speaker 1: But if they don't even call me by my real name,

1088
01:25:08,360 --> 01:25:09,960
Speaker 1: that's how I know they know I got money. This

1089
01:25:10,120 --> 01:25:13,200
Speaker 1: excuse me as Junior and Junior that ain't my coming name.

1090
01:25:14,640 --> 01:25:20,640
Speaker 1: Everybody know now? Well it's right up my alley. Na,

1091
01:25:21,280 --> 01:25:24,640
Speaker 1: I got a little money. Yeah, you know who I

1092
01:25:24,760 --> 01:25:30,080
Speaker 1: am now? Yeah, this goes out to Ike back in

1093
01:25:30,320 --> 01:25:35,000
Speaker 1: Cleveland and Mr Albert's me and stud. Yeah. I used

1094
01:25:35,040 --> 01:25:42,920
Speaker 1: to call me l kate Leawa Na. But and I

1095
01:25:43,960 --> 01:25:47,679
Speaker 1: I'm by your whole damn story. So the next time

1096
01:25:47,800 --> 01:25:51,760
Speaker 1: I walk in, I ain't coming in law feel me? Yeah,

1097
01:25:52,680 --> 01:25:58,640
Speaker 1: I might just by your what are you doing? What

1098
01:25:58,840 --> 01:26:03,160
Speaker 1: are you doing. Hey, let me put an initial out

1099
01:26:03,200 --> 01:26:06,080
Speaker 1: there with a last name, just the initial and the

1100
01:26:06,280 --> 01:26:12,840
Speaker 1: last name. You know who you are, the last name white. Ah,

1101
01:26:13,040 --> 01:26:17,000
Speaker 1: you were so fine, Oh my god, you were fine.

1102
01:26:18,720 --> 01:26:22,080
Speaker 1: Did not even speak to me in the hall way.

1103
01:26:22,720 --> 01:26:25,120
Speaker 1: I walked past you act like a slave because I

1104
01:26:25,160 --> 01:26:27,240
Speaker 1: ain't wanna look your Now he was that damn fine.

1105
01:26:27,800 --> 01:26:34,200
Speaker 1: But oh it has change. Na, she's got a little money. Yeah,

1106
01:26:37,880 --> 01:26:41,960
Speaker 1: he's got a little money. I'll tell you where everybody

1107
01:26:42,000 --> 01:26:44,280
Speaker 1: know my name that Now I'm a lot more familiar

1108
01:26:44,360 --> 01:26:47,920
Speaker 1: and welcome. When I walked into though bank account used

1109
01:26:47,920 --> 01:26:53,960
Speaker 1: to sit on six dollars tray. But when I didn't

1110
01:26:53,960 --> 01:26:55,680
Speaker 1: know this though, when I go in the bank, now

1111
01:26:56,320 --> 01:26:59,680
Speaker 1: there's a whole another room. It's got vegetables in it.

1112
01:27:00,920 --> 01:27:04,719
Speaker 1: She's oh. When I'm doing the Vegas, mr space this away.

1113
01:27:05,439 --> 01:27:08,920
Speaker 1: Just stand come on around this way. Do you have

1114
01:27:09,080 --> 01:27:17,000
Speaker 1: your access card? Neverbod I have mad Oh you know

1115
01:27:17,120 --> 01:27:18,880
Speaker 1: I used to couldn't go to you. That I wouldn't.

1116
01:27:18,880 --> 01:27:21,679
Speaker 1: I didn't get invited to the big Christmas party because

1117
01:27:21,720 --> 01:27:24,559
Speaker 1: I just you know what I'm saying. I wasn't big enough.

1118
01:27:24,600 --> 01:27:27,280
Speaker 1: I didn't have a name enough. But now that I'm violent,

1119
01:27:27,360 --> 01:27:30,000
Speaker 1: and I'm I'm on the show, and I'm then you

1120
01:27:30,080 --> 01:27:32,400
Speaker 1: got a little money doing this stand up. I don't

1121
01:27:32,439 --> 01:27:35,320
Speaker 1: want to go to your fun Christmas party. You're listening

1122
01:27:36,080 --> 01:27:39,080
Speaker 1: Stry Morning show. You're at the doctor's office, and he

1123
01:27:39,120 --> 01:27:43,400
Speaker 1: gave you a pat. Yeah, and he's nice guy, really knowledgeable.

1124
01:27:43,560 --> 01:27:45,280
Speaker 1: You know, I'm gonna go back to see. So I

1125
01:27:45,439 --> 01:27:50,960
Speaker 1: have a bit of flagelitus and it comes from there's

1126
01:27:51,000 --> 01:27:53,240
Speaker 1: a band from the ball of your foot back to

1127
01:27:53,320 --> 01:27:57,200
Speaker 1: your heel and if it's stretches too far doing it,

1128
01:27:57,320 --> 01:27:59,120
Speaker 1: he asked me, was I working out? And I said, yeah,

1129
01:27:59,560 --> 01:28:03,160
Speaker 1: if you stretch it too far, it like snaps, snaps

1130
01:28:03,200 --> 01:28:06,840
Speaker 1: the rubber band and so it's like pulled apart. And

1131
01:28:07,000 --> 01:28:08,439
Speaker 1: he says, the only way to fix it is you

1132
01:28:08,520 --> 01:28:10,680
Speaker 1: gotta ice it. I want you to start wearing like

1133
01:28:11,280 --> 01:28:16,000
Speaker 1: support shoes like New Balance or a c S A

1134
01:28:16,560 --> 01:28:28,320
Speaker 1: stuff I ain't got, you know. And so I'm don war.

1135
01:28:28,560 --> 01:28:32,280
Speaker 1: I had on some Jordan's metal flops and I told

1136
01:28:32,360 --> 01:28:34,280
Speaker 1: him they actually make my He said, no, you need

1137
01:28:34,360 --> 01:28:37,120
Speaker 1: more support than that. I said, but these feel absolutely

1138
01:28:37,200 --> 01:28:39,040
Speaker 1: great when I walk in. So I said, I got

1139
01:28:39,160 --> 01:28:43,160
Speaker 1: him on right now, right, And so he said all

1140
01:28:43,280 --> 01:28:46,880
Speaker 1: you can, you know, expertite it and get a quicker fix.

1141
01:28:46,960 --> 01:28:51,800
Speaker 1: You can take cortizon shot this needles. So and they

1142
01:28:51,880 --> 01:28:54,840
Speaker 1: put it in your heel and then the cortizon is

1143
01:28:54,880 --> 01:28:57,679
Speaker 1: in the needle. So he says, now it's gonna feel

1144
01:28:57,720 --> 01:29:02,240
Speaker 1: like a beasting. That doctor tell you a beasting, you know, beasting.

1145
01:29:03,120 --> 01:29:06,160
Speaker 1: So he pushes this needle in my heel and oh

1146
01:29:06,280 --> 01:29:10,880
Speaker 1: my god, I went, oh man, And he says, hanging out.

1147
01:29:11,360 --> 01:29:18,479
Speaker 1: He said, yeah, but I can't. So he says, he says,

1148
01:29:18,600 --> 01:29:21,400
Speaker 1: now this because I can handle that with the bestead.

1149
01:29:22,000 --> 01:29:23,639
Speaker 1: He said, Now this is the part where it gets

1150
01:29:23,640 --> 01:29:28,679
Speaker 1: a little bit excruciated. I'm gonna inject the cortizone into

1151
01:29:28,800 --> 01:29:31,880
Speaker 1: the heel and it's gonna take about sixty seconds. I'm

1152
01:29:31,880 --> 01:29:34,200
Speaker 1: gonna have to put it in there about four different times,

1153
01:29:34,920 --> 01:29:37,960
Speaker 1: and it's going to be a little, a little very

1154
01:29:38,200 --> 01:29:42,080
Speaker 1: painful just hanging it. And man, when the doctor tells

1155
01:29:42,160 --> 01:29:45,439
Speaker 1: you that, yeah, and I saw him push down on

1156
01:29:45,560 --> 01:29:48,960
Speaker 1: that needle, and man, that dog on cortizone went in there,

1157
01:29:49,439 --> 01:29:51,960
Speaker 1: and lord ha mercy, it was like fire. It was

1158
01:29:52,040 --> 01:29:55,559
Speaker 1: like fire going into your heel. And then he stops

1159
01:29:55,640 --> 01:29:58,200
Speaker 1: injecting it and it calms down a little bit. Then

1160
01:29:58,240 --> 01:30:00,360
Speaker 1: he goes, Okay, we gotta do another one, and I'm

1161
01:30:00,360 --> 01:30:05,080
Speaker 1: going so he shoots another burst of fire to my heel.

1162
01:30:05,800 --> 01:30:08,040
Speaker 1: He did this four times. He said, this is the

1163
01:30:08,160 --> 01:30:12,720
Speaker 1: last one. And man, my palms of my hands was

1164
01:30:12,960 --> 01:30:17,000
Speaker 1: dripping wet. My unarms were wet, and beads of sweat

1165
01:30:17,080 --> 01:30:18,960
Speaker 1: was just on top of my ball head because when

1166
01:30:18,960 --> 01:30:22,599
Speaker 1: I getting hot, you know, like pets, and I started

1167
01:30:22,640 --> 01:30:25,320
Speaker 1: sweating what I was in there having trouble when I

1168
01:30:25,400 --> 01:30:27,080
Speaker 1: got my foot out of his hand. Now he had

1169
01:30:27,120 --> 01:30:29,439
Speaker 1: my foot in the first time he shot it in there.

1170
01:30:29,760 --> 01:30:32,880
Speaker 1: We almost lost the doctor because I damn kick. I

1171
01:30:33,080 --> 01:30:39,840
Speaker 1: came to kissing. Yeah, chill, and man's let me tell

1172
01:30:39,880 --> 01:30:42,519
Speaker 1: you something. I kid you not. In all of my life,

1173
01:30:42,640 --> 01:30:44,880
Speaker 1: I've never had a shot like that in my life.

1174
01:30:45,800 --> 01:30:48,240
Speaker 1: I've never had looked bad. I've had a needle in

1175
01:30:48,360 --> 01:30:51,200
Speaker 1: my eyeball from flashing. When I worked in form on.

1176
01:30:51,280 --> 01:30:54,160
Speaker 1: The company had to scrape this little piece of melie

1177
01:30:54,200 --> 01:30:56,080
Speaker 1: got stuck in my eye and they shot me in

1178
01:30:56,160 --> 01:30:58,320
Speaker 1: the eye with a needle. That took thirty minutes for

1179
01:30:58,400 --> 01:31:01,120
Speaker 1: me to not blink. That took thirty minutes for that

1180
01:31:01,320 --> 01:31:04,400
Speaker 1: to happen. So but but it did. But as soon

1181
01:31:04,439 --> 01:31:07,160
Speaker 1: as they touch your eye with the needle, it immediately numbs.

1182
01:31:07,479 --> 01:31:09,760
Speaker 1: That didn't happen with the foot. It was don't ever

1183
01:31:09,800 --> 01:31:14,400
Speaker 1: get a quarters on shot you. I gotta go, We

1184
01:31:14,479 --> 01:31:18,840
Speaker 1: gotta go, we gotta go. We'll be back. You're listening

1185
01:31:19,120 --> 01:31:22,439
Speaker 1: to Steve Harvey Morning Show. All right, here we go.

1186
01:31:23,360 --> 01:31:25,880
Speaker 1: This segment is called things you say to yourself to

1187
01:31:26,120 --> 01:31:32,920
Speaker 1: keep you from slapping the beep out of someone anyway. See,

1188
01:31:32,960 --> 01:31:37,080
Speaker 1: you need you need to know things that can calm

1189
01:31:37,200 --> 01:31:40,680
Speaker 1: your nerves. See that's what a lot of people don't know.

1190
01:31:40,880 --> 01:31:43,680
Speaker 1: You need calm. And now all this ain't for everybody,

1191
01:31:44,280 --> 01:31:46,479
Speaker 1: but I'm sure out of the ten or soda that

1192
01:31:46,520 --> 01:31:49,439
Speaker 1: I'm gonna list, you can come up with something that

1193
01:31:49,680 --> 01:31:53,280
Speaker 1: fits you. These are just I'm gonna just give you

1194
01:31:53,400 --> 01:31:56,600
Speaker 1: some little woo saw moments that you can kind of

1195
01:31:56,680 --> 01:32:00,000
Speaker 1: say to yourself to cleep from slapping the sugar hunt

1196
01:32:00,080 --> 01:32:03,639
Speaker 1: the iced tea out of somebody down your damn job.

1197
01:32:05,080 --> 01:32:08,559
Speaker 1: He'll be walking to These are some things you can

1198
01:32:08,680 --> 01:32:13,280
Speaker 1: say to yourself to just keep you from slapping them

1199
01:32:13,680 --> 01:32:17,080
Speaker 1: and then losing your job. You're just go down the

1200
01:32:17,160 --> 01:32:21,080
Speaker 1: list created you say these to yourself. I got two

1201
01:32:21,200 --> 01:32:28,920
Speaker 1: kids in college. Yeah, you need that, keep you kids,

1202
01:32:29,000 --> 01:32:33,280
Speaker 1: keep your job. Here, got another one right here. Already

1203
01:32:33,360 --> 01:32:43,400
Speaker 1: got two strikes on my three for life. Here's nothering

1204
01:32:43,479 --> 01:32:47,120
Speaker 1: you can use right here. Oh I just got this job. Yeah,

1205
01:32:52,080 --> 01:32:54,799
Speaker 1: I just got to I gotta work for eight months.

1206
01:32:55,760 --> 01:32:59,360
Speaker 1: I just got this job. But he got about one

1207
01:32:59,400 --> 01:33:04,160
Speaker 1: more time. Say something on and I'm gonna slap to

1208
01:33:04,280 --> 01:33:12,000
Speaker 1: sugar honey. But I just got the joe. Yeah. Oh,

1209
01:33:12,280 --> 01:33:16,200
Speaker 1: I'm closer with tim, and I ain't. I got one

1210
01:33:16,320 --> 01:33:21,160
Speaker 1: more year in this play. In one year, you're gonna

1211
01:33:21,200 --> 01:33:25,120
Speaker 1: get a pension. Turkey. Go watch just hanging there, man,

1212
01:33:25,680 --> 01:33:29,280
Speaker 1: nothing watch the turkey. Here's another one right here. Let

1213
01:33:29,360 --> 01:33:42,320
Speaker 1: it go from frozen. Let here go another one right

1214
01:33:42,400 --> 01:33:43,880
Speaker 1: here for a lot of y'all. And I'm gonna just

1215
01:33:43,880 --> 01:33:49,519
Speaker 1: go and sit in my car smoker joint. I'm gonna

1216
01:33:49,560 --> 01:33:53,720
Speaker 1: just go sit in my car smoking everywhere. I know

1217
01:33:53,840 --> 01:33:55,880
Speaker 1: it's not legal, but you're just trying to keep your job,

1218
01:33:56,160 --> 01:33:58,120
Speaker 1: trying to make sure because I tell you what ain't legal.

1219
01:33:58,160 --> 01:34:01,760
Speaker 1: If you slap the sugar honey, iced tea scares me

1220
01:34:01,880 --> 01:34:06,160
Speaker 1: every time you say every time, yeah, come on, just

1221
01:34:06,320 --> 01:34:17,120
Speaker 1: sing a song to yourself, or you can just try

1222
01:34:17,160 --> 01:34:25,960
Speaker 1: to nothing but the blood the blood a man, or

1223
01:34:26,080 --> 01:34:31,719
Speaker 1: just make up youself. Hold my hands, put them deep

1224
01:34:31,880 --> 01:34:40,400
Speaker 1: into my pocket, my hand, put them deep into my pocket.

1225
01:34:42,479 --> 01:34:48,880
Speaker 1: My hand put them deep into my pockets. For slap

1226
01:34:49,200 --> 01:34:55,559
Speaker 1: the sugar honey tea out of the same melody as

1227
01:34:55,960 --> 01:34:58,000
Speaker 1: do you know the butterfly? But I like it? Yeah,

1228
01:34:59,320 --> 01:35:01,519
Speaker 1: here's the one to keep you from slapping the sugar

1229
01:35:01,560 --> 01:35:05,720
Speaker 1: honey iced t out. Lord knows, I can't go back

1230
01:35:05,760 --> 01:35:15,519
Speaker 1: to jail. I can't go back to jail. I just

1231
01:35:15,600 --> 01:35:20,120
Speaker 1: couldn't stand it down. Now, I just couldn't not stand

1232
01:35:20,200 --> 01:35:23,519
Speaker 1: it down. Lord, I can't go back to jail. Oh,

1233
01:35:23,680 --> 01:35:30,120
Speaker 1: but I want to do something. I beat and done something.

1234
01:35:30,160 --> 01:35:35,360
Speaker 1: I'm sorry you on the show, but I can't go

1235
01:35:35,520 --> 01:35:41,960
Speaker 1: back to jail. Or realization there you saying. So those

1236
01:35:42,000 --> 01:35:44,320
Speaker 1: are things that you can use on your job. You

1237
01:35:44,400 --> 01:35:46,679
Speaker 1: can say to yourself, if you from slapping the sugar

1238
01:35:46,720 --> 01:35:49,320
Speaker 1: honey iced tea, how your co workers just use them?

1239
01:35:49,760 --> 01:35:53,920
Speaker 1: Let it go all right. A bear takes an suv

1240
01:35:54,280 --> 01:35:58,080
Speaker 1: and leaves calling card. Bear caused a lot of chaos

1241
01:35:58,240 --> 01:36:01,240
Speaker 1: by breaking into an suv. Not only did the bear

1242
01:36:01,479 --> 01:36:03,960
Speaker 1: get into the vehicle, but he drove it until it

1243
01:36:04,080 --> 01:36:07,320
Speaker 1: crashed into a neighbor's mailbox. As a bonus, he ripped

1244
01:36:07,320 --> 01:36:10,719
Speaker 1: out the radio and the steering wheel, drub the back window,

1245
01:36:10,840 --> 01:36:13,920
Speaker 1: and trashed the interior. All of this happened in minutes,

1246
01:36:14,360 --> 01:36:27,799
Speaker 1: and last but not least, the bear pooped. Not by accident, family,

1247
01:36:28,960 --> 01:36:38,479
Speaker 1: he purpose. He look, he had been coming down there

1248
01:36:38,520 --> 01:36:41,880
Speaker 1: for a couple of years, eating out the trailer. Then

1249
01:36:41,920 --> 01:36:46,559
Speaker 1: they're gonna get a bad lock put on. They've been

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01:36:46,600 --> 01:36:50,800
Speaker 1: coming down two years, come down for dinner eating. They're

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01:36:50,800 --> 01:36:55,040
Speaker 1: gonna put a bad lock on their trail. Man, he

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01:36:55,200 --> 01:36:59,920
Speaker 1: just gonna they're gonna close a restaurant. Don't notify him. Said,

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01:37:00,600 --> 01:37:05,040
Speaker 1: I'll tell you what. I'm gonna breaking this damn truck. Yeah,

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01:37:05,479 --> 01:37:08,080
Speaker 1: I'm gonna tell the radio to stay. I'm gonna rip

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01:37:08,200 --> 01:37:10,479
Speaker 1: up all the cushions, I'm gonna break all the windows

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01:37:10,520 --> 01:37:15,439
Speaker 1: in it, and I leave. Yeah, honey, ice tea, y'all

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01:37:15,680 --> 01:37:25,720
Speaker 1: over the ladies and gentlemen. I've just been a great day.

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01:37:25,880 --> 01:37:28,519
Speaker 1: We'll see you this weekend. Have a great weekend. My

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01:37:28,880 --> 01:37:35,960
Speaker 1: day always look forward to. You're small minded, thinking people,

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01:37:41,720 --> 01:37:54,200
Speaker 1: A little for all. Steve Harvey contests, no purchase necessary,

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01:37:54,280 --> 01:37:57,240
Speaker 1: void where prohibited. Participants must be legal US residents at

1262
01:37:57,320 --> 01:37:59,880
Speaker 1: least eighteen years old, unless otherwise stated. For a complete

1263
01:38:00,000 --> 01:38:03,160
Speaker 1: intest Rules Physics, Steve Harvey dot com. You're listening to

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Speaker 1: The Steve Harvey Morning showm