Speaker 1: Second date of date.
Speaker 2: This happens every so often, but sometimes a listener will
Speaker 2: do a second date update with us that doesn't end
Speaker 2: with a yes.
Speaker 3: Often, But the thing is.
Speaker 2: They're so impressed by us, specifically me and my efforts
Speaker 2: to jumpstart their love lives, that they're willing to call
Speaker 2: back and give it another go.
Speaker 4: You know, you don't have to.
Speaker 5: Do Mountain's mouth anymore with CPR, but.
Speaker 6: I like that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's why Justin has reached out to us once again.
Speaker 2: He was on a few months back, and last time
Speaker 2: the lady he went out with was not impressed cause
Speaker 2: she showed up an hour late to dinner, but said
Speaker 2: Justin wasn't man enough to be mad about it and
Speaker 2: cancel what?
Speaker 6: Oh?
Speaker 3: I think?
Speaker 4: I remember that it was.
Speaker 2: Really weird and that call definitely crashed and burned, but
Speaker 2: we promised to try and do better for Justin this time.
Speaker 3: So Justin, welcome back.
Speaker 7: Hey, thank you guys for having me.
Speaker 5: Oh man, how long did you wait for your date
Speaker 5: to show up this time? Justin?
Speaker 7: No, she actually came right on time. That side he.
Speaker 5: Test, and you failed it?
Speaker 4: Sure you're to get up and leave and make her way?
Speaker 7: Yeah?
Speaker 2: I think that shows improvement, And I heard that you've
Speaker 2: been actually doing a little bit of research since the
Speaker 2: last time you were on with us.
Speaker 7: Yeah, I feel like the learning process never really ends.
Speaker 7: I'm always trying to better myself, you know.
Speaker 5: So deep.
Speaker 7: So Justice, I heard about this book called Attached. Have
Speaker 7: you guys, are you familiar with it?
Speaker 5: Attached?
Speaker 7: I don't.
Speaker 2: Reading is not on the top of the list of
Speaker 2: hobbies for this group, so but tell us about it.
Speaker 3: What is attached about?
Speaker 7: So this book basically talked about how most people come
Speaker 7: into three different psychological categories while dating. Okay, secure, where
Speaker 7: you can communicate openly and like I could be like, hey,
Speaker 7: I know you're busy, but I just kind of get
Speaker 7: nervous when you don't text back. Could you text me?
Speaker 7: Just let me know, even if it's just like a
Speaker 7: little thumbs up or something.
Speaker 5: Oh, it's like the type of communicator you are, exactly.
Speaker 3: In the story groups, they're secure.
Speaker 7: Yeah. The other two categories are anxious and avoidant. Good
Speaker 7: and anxious people are like the super needy ones where
Speaker 7: it's just like, no, you gotta text me, and if
Speaker 7: you don't hear a text back, you're texting them like
Speaker 7: twenty times, like where are you? Where are you?
Speaker 5: Pose registered for you?
Speaker 4: Oh if I'm necessarily anxious in that sense, but in
Speaker 4: real life I'm anxious a lot.
Speaker 5: Yeah. And then what's the other one? Again?
Speaker 7: The last one is avoidant, where like if things start
Speaker 7: getting real, they'll push apart a little bit, like they
Speaker 7: want distance. They don't want to be smothered or anything.
Speaker 4: Okay, can you be more than one? Like I feel
Speaker 4: like i'm the first two combined.
Speaker 3: You have to read the book and find out.
Speaker 2: Oh no, I'm just going to wait for the movie
Speaker 2: to come out.
Speaker 6: Yeah, that was really like a fun movie, Jess.
Speaker 3: Yeah, if they can, don't.
Speaker 2: Make it really short because my attentions fan isn't great. Okay,
Speaker 2: So which which one are you justin?
Speaker 7: So I'm secure with traits of anxious and so you
Speaker 7: can be more than one?
Speaker 3: Okay?
Speaker 5: Okay, So how did that change dating?
Speaker 7: I'm just really open and communicative about what I'm expecting,
Speaker 7: how I feel. No more games of like like you know,
Speaker 7: with the girl who was late, I could just be like,
Speaker 7: hey you're late, that made me feel this way? What's
Speaker 7: going on? You know, just talk about it?
Speaker 6: So we did we go on a dat or we
Speaker 6: just hearing about how your love life has improved.
Speaker 2: For everybody in the or Justin wrote this book and
Speaker 2: he's trying to sell exactly. Yeah, so how does all
Speaker 2: this relate to your your new and improved dating life?
Speaker 7: So I put this on my dating profile where I
Speaker 7: said secure attachment styles only, and it didn't really get
Speaker 7: me any clicks. But then I put that smiley emoji
Speaker 7: with like the sweat drop coming on the forehead, you know,
Speaker 7: and that got me.
Speaker 2: So who matched with your secure people only demand?
Speaker 7: With this wonderful woman named Kelly. She's an interior designer,
Speaker 7: absolutely very very secure, and I kind of wanted to
Speaker 7: have her see what I did. I don't even know
Speaker 7: if we spoke about this last time. I'm a professional rapper,
Speaker 7: Like at least part time did not come up, because, like,
Speaker 7: you know, unless you're super duper famous, people just presume
Speaker 7: your craps.
Speaker 3: You invited CALLI to what watch You wrap somewhere?
Speaker 7: Yeah, to a show that I was doing, and we
Speaker 7: hung out before we got to know each other, and
Speaker 7: then it was time for me to go on stage.
Speaker 7: And I had a couple of songs that night, so
Speaker 7: I did those. The crowd was really into it. Like
Speaker 7: I was a little nervous, you know, sometimes the crowd
Speaker 7: might not be into it. But yeah, but when I
Speaker 7: got off States, she said it was awesome, Like people
Speaker 7: were coming up to me, just like taking photos and
Speaker 7: things of that sort, which is always fun. But I
Speaker 7: kind of worried, like maybe my lyrics were a little
Speaker 7: bit too vulgar. But that's kind of also like the
Speaker 7: nature of the beast of being an artist vulger.
Speaker 5: I mean, you're a rap artist unless you're Will Smith.
Speaker 1: Rapper.
Speaker 7: Yeah, she did say it was awesome, but I remember,
Speaker 7: like there's a point where I made eye contact with
Speaker 7: her while I was wrapping, and I noticed her eyes
Speaker 7: were kind of big where she was like I don't
Speaker 7: know if she thought this, but my read was like
Speaker 7: she's like, what the hell did he just say?
Speaker 5: Can you give a subject material? Like I get to
Speaker 5: know anything?
Speaker 7: Some of it gets political, some of it is just,
Speaker 7: you know, like.
Speaker 4: Democrats secure up in the building.
Speaker 5: Well, okay, got your openers for you the next show.
Speaker 7: I wanted to stay a little longer and hang out more,
Speaker 7: but like while the people were taking photos, she was
Speaker 7: just like, I gotta go. It was so great being you.
Speaker 7: And then yeah, I had a tough time getting another date,
Speaker 7: and I really really did like her, you know, way
Speaker 7: more than the girl all who made me wait an hour.
Speaker 4: Yeah, by this time you kind of made her wait. Yeah,
Speaker 4: same thing.
Speaker 2: Well, we'll see what Calli has to say, because we're
Speaker 2: gonna drop some beats right here just for you, and
Speaker 2: then we're gonna come back and get your second date
Speaker 2: update right after this.
Speaker 7: All right, sounds great, All right, hold on, man.
Speaker 1: Date.
Speaker 2: He's smart, he's sexy, and he's totally secure. I'm talking
Speaker 2: about our listener, Justin, who's back doing a second date
Speaker 2: update for the second time on our show because we
Speaker 2: failed him the first go round. Yeah, but this time
Speaker 2: Justin went out with a woman named Calli, who he
Speaker 2: described as also secure and right.
Speaker 5: That's their attachment or whatever it is.
Speaker 3: It's a good thing.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and she got to see him in his elements,
Speaker 2: spitting mad bars at a rap show.
Speaker 3: Weird part was while.
Speaker 2: He was taking photos with fans after his performance, Calli
Speaker 2: suddenly ducked out, said.
Speaker 3: She had to go.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and we don't know why. I'm sure Brooke has
Speaker 2: some theories for why.
Speaker 4: I don't know.
Speaker 5: Maybe she just was sick of me. I mean it's
Speaker 5: a long time to go to a rap show and
Speaker 5: then to sit and all the fans coming out.
Speaker 6: Yeah, your date like being on stage and not with you.
Speaker 6: You say you're by yourself and then you're by yourself.
Speaker 4: More literally like as a comedy and greed and your
Speaker 4: date is just watching. Yeah, boring.
Speaker 7: I didn't get that at all. I mean, I didn't
Speaker 7: want to be rude to the people who come up.
Speaker 7: You know, I'm not like a Kanye West or anything.
Speaker 7: They came to the show, I'm gonna take a second
Speaker 7: to say hello back.
Speaker 5: No, we're not saying that that's bad.
Speaker 6: It's just that, like on a first date, that may be.
Speaker 6: You know, it kind of just sucks from her perspective,
Speaker 6: you know.
Speaker 4: But everyone else gets time with you with her.
Speaker 2: Real stars don't take photos with their fans because they're
Speaker 2: past that. And maybe it came across as kind of needy.
Speaker 3: That you need your fans to seem cool. He said
Speaker 3: he was secure, but maybe this whole time, maybe, Yeah,
Speaker 3: what's the other ones anxious?
Speaker 7: I have? Tracea's anxiousness. I said that it is maybe.
Speaker 3: The anxiousness turned her off. But we're going to call
Speaker 3: her and find out. Let's style. Callie's number and see
Speaker 3: what she has to say.
Speaker 7: All right, here we go. Hello, Hey, is this Cali?
Speaker 3: This is her secure account?
Speaker 8: No, excuse me, my.
Speaker 2: Name is Jeff. I heard that you were secure. Sorry,
Speaker 2: my name is Jeff from the radio show Brooke and
Speaker 2: Jeffrey in the Morning.
Speaker 5: There it is, all right?
Speaker 8: Which radio show?
Speaker 3: I don't don't about it.
Speaker 5: We have a podcast too, Maybe you listen to that.
Speaker 8: I don't think i've heard of you guys. What's just about?
Speaker 2: Well, we do a segment on this show called Second
Speaker 2: Date Update, and we're trying to help one of our
Speaker 2: listeners get a hold of you because you went out
Speaker 2: with him the other night and now you're avoiding him.
Speaker 3: His name is Justin. Oh, well, you guys went to
Speaker 3: a rap show.
Speaker 8: Yeah, I remember him. How much do you guys know?
Speaker 6: Well, we know that he is an up and coming
Speaker 6: rap star and he took you to his show.
Speaker 4: But he said you left while you were doing a
Speaker 4: meet and greet.
Speaker 8: Yeah I did so. I didn't really enjoy him very much.
Speaker 8: Oh No, the show is fine. He's actually a really
Speaker 8: talented rapper. Like I didn't mind the show at all.
Speaker 8: I thought he's pretty good.
Speaker 4: You liked him on stage, but you didn't like him.
Speaker 3: He's on stage persona.
Speaker 8: Yeah, he lost me, I mean before the rap, like
Speaker 8: you were talking about before the show. Oh he guy
Speaker 8: just kept going on about the book, the attachment theory book.
Speaker 5: Was it too much for you?
Speaker 8: He just wouldn't let it go, Like and on a
Speaker 8: first date, the first time I'm ever talking to him,
Speaker 8: he's like psychoanalyzing me and like we're trying to figure
Speaker 8: it out for our personalities match. And I'm like, I
Speaker 8: couldn't find out if I click with you th for
Speaker 8: just having a conversation about what we like to do. Like,
Speaker 8: I mean, it's cool to click with someone and their values,
Speaker 8: but you don't normally figure that out on date one
Speaker 8: and like just based on this one theory, Like it
Speaker 8: was boring to just talk about that and only that.
Speaker 5: It's like people who won't date like other horoscope science.
Speaker 6: Yeah yeah, and you didn't feel like, I mean you
Speaker 6: were interested. You knew from the beginning that you weren't
Speaker 6: going to give him another shot.
Speaker 8: Well I knew after about thirty minutes of him talking
Speaker 8: about this over and over that I was.
Speaker 2: Bored thirty Oh oh, he went on for thirty minutes
Speaker 2: of that attachment theory.
Speaker 6: We talked to him for like five minutes about it,
Speaker 6: and it felt like a lot.
Speaker 3: I know, thirty minutes of that conversation.
Speaker 2: I mean, at least he's passionate about it. Passion is
Speaker 2: a good quality to have about things.
Speaker 8: But he wouldn't let it go. And it was like
Speaker 8: a tedious breakdown of the book, like all the categories
Speaker 8: who they match with, and you know, deciding that Okay,
Speaker 8: I'm secure and he's secure. I was like, okay, but
Speaker 8: only one of us is boring.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that really hurts.
Speaker 3: It got to hurt to hear. I don't know.
Speaker 2: Maybe Justin's secure enough to take it in stride, because
Speaker 2: cal I need to tell you he's on the other
Speaker 2: line listening right now and wants to talk to you.
Speaker 8: You had him on the whole time, Yeah he did.
Speaker 1: Justin, Hey, Kelly, hearing how secure he sounds, you could.
Speaker 8: I didn't want to be mean to you. I just
Speaker 8: you need to know that this strategy doesn't work, Like
Speaker 8: women aren't into that.
Speaker 7: It's not a strategy. I just really like the book
Speaker 7: I read, and I thought you were enjoying the conversation,
Speaker 7: like the vibe that I was getting. You know, I'm
Speaker 7: sorry I misread the situation. I didn't know. Maybe it
Speaker 7: was because I was pre show Jitters or something and
Speaker 7: I missed the signs.
Speaker 8: But I don't think you were reading that situation right
Speaker 8: at all. And it's just not a good strategy, Like
Speaker 8: it's date one. We're supposed to just talk about, you know,
Speaker 8: all the trivial things likes and dislikes with pizza toppings
Speaker 8: you eat when Netflix shows you're currently binge watching.
Speaker 2: Like he's talking about his favorite book. You know, it's
Speaker 2: not fifty Shades of Gray, but at least it's like adjacent.
Speaker 7: I'm sorry, I'm not basic. I don't want to go
Speaker 7: much and talk about like pizza toppings, Like do you
Speaker 7: know how many girls I go out with? Like I'm
Speaker 7: trying to find somebody who's special.
Speaker 4: Hey, some people can talk about pizza toppings for very
Speaker 4: very much. That just came off a little hot.
Speaker 3: Yeah, came off confident.
Speaker 7: I think the first nats get so repetitive. I thought
Speaker 7: we connected on something deeper, you know, but it sounds like.
Speaker 6: You were listening to her. It sounds like you were
Speaker 6: just like monologuing about a book that you read.
Speaker 7: I thought she was into it, and I apologized. I
Speaker 7: didn't mean to be boring. I gotta be work for you,
Speaker 7: and it's not boring. Wow, I'm a dope rapper. I'm
Speaker 7: one of the best to ever do it.
Speaker 3: Okay, okay's happening.
Speaker 6: I remember you're taking pictures of fans, and that's Jeffrey proved.
Speaker 4: You don't see Kanye taking a picture of anybody.
Speaker 2: Let's just pretend that you didn't hear him call you
Speaker 2: the other bee work.
Speaker 7: Wow.
Speaker 2: Can you see how it was maybe a little bit
Speaker 2: your fault because you were encouraging him. He says that
Speaker 2: she seemed interested.
Speaker 8: Yeah, that can definitely not be blamed on me, just
Speaker 8: because I didn't step in and say, hey, stop talking
Speaker 8: about this, now, you're boring me, like that would have
Speaker 8: been That would have.
Speaker 3: Been very helpful clue to him that he needs to
Speaker 3: change the.
Speaker 5: Subject, and he was really secure.
Speaker 4: Would have been fine with him.
Speaker 8: He's not the best at reading people, because it was
Speaker 8: very clear that I was bored. And you know, when
Speaker 8: you say to somebody like, oh cool, like four times
Speaker 8: in a row. Yeah, luckily you're not really there.
Speaker 2: Luckily, I'm very good at reading people and reading situations
Speaker 2: and sensing a vibe right here.
Speaker 3: I am.
Speaker 2: I'm feeling the love connection happening, and that's why I'd
Speaker 2: like to offer to send Cali out on another date
Speaker 2: with Justin.
Speaker 3: We'll pay for it.
Speaker 7: I'm going to stop you right there. I thought this
Speaker 7: girl was secure. I'm getting so much avoidant and anxious
Speaker 7: vibes from her. I don't think I'm ready for a
Speaker 7: second to you.
Speaker 3: I'm still sensing some vibes going on.
Speaker 8: I don't want to just I not only there's something
Speaker 8: we agree on.
Speaker 7: Ok yeah, I not only misread that conversation, I misread
Speaker 7: her entire profile and who she was as a human being.
Speaker 7: So yeah, hard Pass.
Speaker 2: So I'm getting a sense this is more of just
Speaker 2: a hook up one night thing. Oh okay, she's not
Speaker 2: going to stay the night. She's just going to be
Speaker 2: in and out before the sun even comes up.
Speaker 4: Hard Pass the name of his album.
Speaker 3: That's a good album.
Speaker 2: I'm just trying really hard because I don't want to
Speaker 2: go oh for two with Justin here.
Speaker 7: Listen, you, guys, this is not your fault. I mean,
Speaker 7: I love you, guys, I love the show. I love
Speaker 7: that you like are taking the time to help me you're,
Speaker 7: oh for one, batting five hundred.
Speaker 3: It's pretty good.
Speaker 2: Hey, I don't think I'm calling it fifty to fifty.
Speaker 5: We have definitely never gotten on basis it's.
Speaker 3: In victory in my book. Congratulations Justin. He just got
Speaker 3: hit by a pitch.
Speaker 5: Jeffrey in the morning,