Speaker 1: I leave in a you wanna way back home? Either way, we.
Speaker 2: Want to be there, doesn't matter how much baggage you
Speaker 2: claim and give us time and a German, al and gay.
Speaker 3: We want to send you off inside. Do you wanna
Speaker 3: welcome you back home?
Speaker 1: Tell us all about it? We scared her?
Speaker 3: Was it fine? Now for do you need to ride?
Speaker 1: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 4: Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?
Speaker 1: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 3: Do your need ride?
Speaker 4: Ride with Karen and Chris.
Speaker 5: Welcome to Do you need a ride? My name's Chris Fairbanks.
Speaker 1: My name is Karen Colgareth. Hi, Karen, Hi Chris.
Speaker 5: It feels like I haven't seen you in some time.
Speaker 6: I've honestly missed you and almost called you one time.
Speaker 5: You don't ever hesitate.
Speaker 4: To do that.
Speaker 1: Well, it's you're not allowed to anymore. Oh yeah, you
Speaker 1: know people.
Speaker 6: I've actually had people who I thought were my good
Speaker 6: friends called them on the phone and have them have
Speaker 6: the weirdest reactions.
Speaker 4: Well, I mean, by call me, I did mean for you.
Speaker 5: To just text me.
Speaker 6: But what I'm saying is I missed you enough so
Speaker 6: that I wanted to call you and hear your voice.
Speaker 5: I'm kidding of course I want you.
Speaker 1: To call You were going for what two weeks?
Speaker 5: Over three?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 5: My all in t I mean.
Speaker 1: What seven weeks? It felt like seven.
Speaker 5: Well that slow drift towards those parked cars felt like
Speaker 5: seven seconds. Really it was just one. So it's the
Speaker 5: same effect. It's fight, right. You notice in TV shows
Speaker 5: where people are talking and driving, they just turn their
Speaker 5: head and look at the person, yes, because they want
Speaker 5: their face on camera.
Speaker 6: I'm here to tell you that that is not realistic,
Speaker 6: and you can't look away from the road for one second.
Speaker 4: Not even one second.
Speaker 1: I literally just.
Speaker 6: Tried to look at Chris like we were having a
Speaker 6: conversation and almost just took out a whole row cars.
Speaker 5: See, that's why we should just be texting and driving,
Speaker 5: because it's too dangerous to actually talk.
Speaker 1: We should be in two separate cars texting each other.
Speaker 6: We should, and then reading the text aloud very high speeds.
Speaker 6: Highway highway texting is the new podcast that we're going
Speaker 6: to be doing.
Speaker 5: At least they're not making eye contact with a person
Speaker 5: that might be in the car. Now, that's dangerous. No,
Speaker 5: at least when you're texting you're facing forward.
Speaker 6: It's also it's danger physically, and then it's also very
Speaker 6: dangerous emotionally to make that connection with a person.
Speaker 4: It's dangerous. There's so much risk in so many ways.
Speaker 5: In so many ways, I feel not I feel exhausted.
Speaker 5: I think, well, so you were truly.
Speaker 6: Like just this morning, came home from a three week
Speaker 6: run on the road doing stand up comedy for three weeks.
Speaker 5: Yeah, there was downtime, and I think it was the
Speaker 5: downtime I didn't like. I wish that all the shows
Speaker 5: could just be all in one week and a half
Speaker 5: long period, all next to each other. Yeah, that would
Speaker 5: have been great.
Speaker 1: But then you had time to kind of simmer in it.
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, to marinate, marinate aka feel lonely or like
Speaker 5: I don't know what I'm doing with my career mm.
Speaker 6: Hmmm yeah, to really just have those ask the big questions.
Speaker 6: But when you're by yourself in a days.
Speaker 5: In, Yeah, it's important to evaluate your life when you're
Speaker 5: in a low rand hotel. I wish I was in
Speaker 5: days in. I was in many in many a count
Speaker 5: I tore him open like the animal from Star Wars
Speaker 5: and probably cushions.
Speaker 1: Apple in that one video where you got inside the.
Speaker 6: Couch, Yes, exactly oh, I like to picture you like that.
Speaker 5: I like to picture me in all of Fienna at Fienna.
Speaker 5: Oh Apple, Oh, I feel terrific.
Speaker 1: It's gonna be a good one.
Speaker 5: I have a stomach ache and a headache.
Speaker 1: Should we get two different ginger ale?
Speaker 4: Oh that's old wives tail.
Speaker 1: No ginger is good for you.
Speaker 5: There's no ginger in ginger ale. Maybe in the forties.
Speaker 1: It's uh.
Speaker 6: The ginger ale I drink is just one big slice
Speaker 6: of ginger with I can't.
Speaker 5: I can't drink a beverage while podcasting. I think I've
Speaker 5: decided that, Well, there's.
Speaker 1: A little cup of water right there in case an emergency.
Speaker 5: Oh, that I can in case I have some emergency.
Speaker 1: To pour in there emergency.
Speaker 5: So you you're gonna do it. You have to do
Speaker 5: a lot of the heavy lifting.
Speaker 1: Okay.
Speaker 5: Mentally, who's that is that? Who are we picking up today?
Speaker 1: Karen McCarthy, which he was? I think he. I just
Speaker 1: texted him to come out.
Speaker 4: Is he on his stoop?
Speaker 1: He was smoking his stick on the stoop. Wait. I said,
Speaker 1: we're going to go on around block and get you,
Speaker 1: and then he said, yes.
Speaker 5: That was one thing I noticed in Texas, all of
Speaker 5: the comics still smoked.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, does anyone vape?
Speaker 5: I'm sure they do a lot of vaping, but they
Speaker 5: probably don't talk about it because they don't want to
Speaker 5: say the word vape. I hope they don't. I don't.
Speaker 1: It's very embarrassing.
Speaker 5: It's embarrassing when it comes out of your mouth.
Speaker 6: Although I have to say that being able to vape
Speaker 6: inside a bar is kind of fun. It feels very illegal. Yeah,
Speaker 6: like it feels. It feels like the Roaring thirties are
Speaker 6: in the twenties.
Speaker 5: And it's funny because I was looking at photos from
Speaker 5: just ten years ago in Austin. Maybe it was ten
Speaker 5: eleven years ago. Well, that needed no correcting, and everyone's
Speaker 5: in the comedy club just smoking, like hanging out in
Speaker 5: the comedy club. Like even then, I think that you
Speaker 5: weren't supposed to smoke indoors, But it was not that long.
Speaker 4: Ago that it was total normal.
Speaker 5: Yeah, if you did that now, people would scream and
Speaker 5: call you a lunatic.
Speaker 6: They would they would see what you doing, they would
Speaker 6: they would beat you and then they would take you
Speaker 6: to court.
Speaker 5: Then all the townsfolk would be walking with torches and
Speaker 5: they rose and pitch.
Speaker 1: Fork they would Frankenstein Frankenstein's monster.
Speaker 5: Please let's be specific. Oh, I wonder if I can
Speaker 5: unbutton my leather jacket from the gangster top button position.
Speaker 5: It's a weird jet. This isn't my kind of jacket.
Speaker 5: I feel like I'm trying to be cool.
Speaker 1: I like it, is it thick leather?
Speaker 5: Oh, it's it's rubber. I think I feel like I'm
Speaker 5: wearing it. Like, yeah, just like the fawns wore a
Speaker 5: baggy wet suit.
Speaker 1: And your shirt has eyeglasses.
Speaker 5: Yeah, little, yeah, it's like I'm always wearing glasses. But
Speaker 5: I'm not get it. You get it my little joke
Speaker 5: about the shirt.
Speaker 1: I got it.
Speaker 5: Oh the shirt. Yes, I'm just wearing glasses.
Speaker 1: There's Matt McCarthy. They recognize him.
Speaker 5: Oh, he's the best.
Speaker 1: Do you know Matt McCarthy.
Speaker 5: I do. I've seen him do stand up and I'm like, well,
Speaker 5: that guy's funny. I hope one day I can be
Speaker 5: friends with him, or maybe riding a car with him.
Speaker 1: Today's the day. Yeah, but I really hope that you're
Speaker 1: best friends by the end of this trip.
Speaker 5: I think we will. Hi, Matt, Hi, Matt, have a seat.
Speaker 5: There's a microphone. He knows what he knows what?
Speaker 1: This guy's un natural?
Speaker 5: How are you good to see it? We met before
Speaker 5: we did a show, or maybe not. I confused watching
Speaker 5: people do stand up for having met them. I saw
Speaker 5: you a holy fuck or whatever they call that now.
Speaker 5: Oh sleep away camp, yeh, sleep away camp, and you
Speaker 5: were terrific than you. I'm like, who's that guy? Maybe
Speaker 5: I can be friends with him and or podcast in
Speaker 5: a car with him one day. Well, we're doing it.
Speaker 6: It's happening. Matt also has a podcast. His is all
Speaker 6: about wrestling.
Speaker 5: Yeah, we watched wrestling with New Wrestling, Old Wrestling, WWE,
Speaker 5: ww F.
Speaker 4: Yeah, all of it, any wrestling, pro wrestling. We watched
Speaker 4: Mexican Lucha Libre Japanese. Uhsawa, I think that's how they
Speaker 4: say it.
Speaker 1: You mean, yeah, that's a director.
Speaker 5: Sorry, no, she.
Speaker 4: Karen just got back from World War two forgive her
Speaker 4: flavorant race and.
Speaker 1: Just all these different ways you could see this podcast.
Speaker 5: Also, since she's been back, Matt, I've noticed, don't make
Speaker 5: any loud sudden noises because.
Speaker 1: I always think Charlie's coming.
Speaker 4: Charlie, Charlie.
Speaker 1: That's a light racial isn't nice and fun.
Speaker 4: Charlie's in the Tree.
Speaker 5: Have you ever been?
Speaker 4: I went to college with a guy who was overtly racist.
Speaker 1: Were you in Boston by any chance?
Speaker 4: No, I was in New York City. It was startling.
Speaker 4: I was in the Bronx too, so it was like
Speaker 4: but like meeting people from.
Speaker 1: All over, but like high risk racism.
Speaker 4: A lot of the New New England people, Sure, the
Speaker 4: New York Natives were the most racist people I'd ever
Speaker 4: met in my entire life. And it blew my mind.
Speaker 5: I've heard I've heard that more than more than once.
Speaker 4: I mean, and I was from Rhode Island. It's very
Speaker 4: densely populated, but I was just sheltered and I, you know,
Speaker 4: I realize that more and more.
Speaker 5: My gosh, Yeah, I'm from the widest state ever, Montana,
Speaker 5: and that's fun. Yeah, you don't run into a lot
Speaker 5: of people say disparaging things about Native Americans because they're there,
Speaker 5: and that always bothered me.
Speaker 4: Well, my wife's from Colorado, so she understands that.
Speaker 5: She probably had a similar upbringing to me.
Speaker 6: I grew up in a similar states, So I don't
Speaker 6: know what anyone's talking really.
Speaker 4: You grew up in the Yeah, there were a lot
Speaker 4: of there are a lot of natives in her town
Speaker 4: growing up. Yes, Oh, not in like rich Colorado, I
Speaker 4: mean like Durango, Colorado.
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, I've been there. I've been to the I
Speaker 5: used to have a sticker from the Durango Shredshed there
Speaker 5: you go. I bought a leash there when I was
Speaker 5: snowboarding a crested butte.
Speaker 4: It's just snowboard.
Speaker 5: You were going to tell yeah, yeah, yeah, tell us
Speaker 5: racist stories? Was I Yeah, yeah, you were gonna say,
Speaker 5: verbat him some of the things that's racist, friend of yours.
Speaker 4: You're still yell oh yeah, yeah yeah. So I went
Speaker 4: to college with the guy who was like overtly racist,
Speaker 4: and uh, he would get liquered up and he would
Speaker 4: run around on campus, you know, late at night, like
Speaker 4: not like we'd be walking home from the bar. Let's say,
Speaker 4: he wouldn't just get drunk and then go running around
Speaker 4: doing this although possibly, but uh and scream like you know,
Speaker 4: racial epitaphs and be like Charlie's in the Trees Charlie's.
Speaker 5: Wow, Oh my god, was he crazy? Or is that
Speaker 5: his that was his brand of comedy.
Speaker 4: I guess that he thought that was his brand. I
Speaker 4: don't Yeah, I don't know. He was crazy too. He was,
Speaker 4: you know, a violent drunk. He was the only one
Speaker 4: who was. He would get drunk and just became violent
Speaker 4: and a group of very silly drunks.
Speaker 5: Wow, and he's he was in college. He actually got
Speaker 5: a degree and is out there in the workforce currently,
Speaker 5: probably has a wife and kids.
Speaker 4: Yeah, he went well, he went back to his high
Speaker 4: school and now he teaches it. That so now's yes.
Speaker 5: Of course good. It's important a guy like that mold
Speaker 5: a young forming.
Speaker 6: Brain because really, to be honest, Charlie is in the trees.
Speaker 6: I'm sorry, you know, I'm sorry your PC mind doesn't
Speaker 6: like it.
Speaker 4: Those guys are pro Charlie mind, exactly pro Charlie.
Speaker 5: They have a racial propensity for tree climbing. Is that
Speaker 5: really even a bad thing to say? We all love treehouses?
Speaker 4: Guerrilla warfare back in the day.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I always wondered what that meant.
Speaker 1: Is that really what it meant?
Speaker 4: I have no idea, Probably not, since the spelling is different. Yeah,
Speaker 4: but maybe.
Speaker 1: Matt and I had brunches morning.
Speaker 5: Is that the That's the meal that people have when
Speaker 5: they're hungry in between breakfast and lunch, right, it's the meal.
Speaker 6: People have when they want when they want to drink
Speaker 6: in the morning and talk shit about people.
Speaker 5: Okay, that's what I find. Okay, I've never.
Speaker 1: Had a good one.
Speaker 4: We had a good one. And what's interesting is Kevin's
Speaker 4: last name is Kaminsky, so it was Karen Kolgareth, Vin Kominsky.
Speaker 4: Me and Glennis were like, Oh my gosh, who's one
Speaker 4: less case.
Speaker 1: So many cas be racist.
Speaker 4: This is the ras. Oh, we're not going to get
Speaker 4: away from it.
Speaker 1: You can't.
Speaker 5: Have you seen that Mexican wrestling that I had to
Speaker 5: commentate it once it was done. It was very fun,
Speaker 5: but it made me very nervous because the people watching
Speaker 5: are very serious about the wrestling, So you have to
Speaker 5: be funny but also not say anything bad about the wrestling.
Speaker 1: To be respectful.
Speaker 5: Oh, you must respect the moves, even when it's two
Speaker 5: little little guys dressed like chickens coming out of an
Speaker 5: egg that cracked. Like the theatrics with the Luca Libre
Speaker 5: are pretty terrific.
Speaker 4: You know who luvvum.
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, that's not for me, that's not for you.
Speaker 4: I take it so seriously. I can't even show up
Speaker 4: and watch the guy come.
Speaker 5: Up to see I wonder that's kind of what because.
Speaker 4: A lot of the talent that does work there. I
Speaker 4: go and see them up in resita do what they
Speaker 4: do and they are outstanding.
Speaker 5: Well that's that seems like it must be uh, you
Speaker 5: must be torn because.
Speaker 4: Actually now we're back to gorillas again. It's pro wrestling gorilla.
Speaker 5: Oh that's what that that's I was going to go
Speaker 5: to that. Ron Funches said, that's your most amazing thing ever?
Speaker 4: Is always there? I want to go I'm always there.
Speaker 5: And that's the kind of wrestling where they break fluorescent
Speaker 5: bulbs and staple each other in the face and stuff.
Speaker 4: No, no, no, this is this is much more like
Speaker 4: the Lucha Libre in Mexico. And everybody does a a
Speaker 4: tope socdo over the top rope or well I guess
Speaker 4: that's through the rope whatever. But everybody flies, everybody flips,
Speaker 4: everybody flops. It's a outstanding wake the kids.
Speaker 5: What sounds like that's absolutely something you couldn't take seriously
Speaker 5: or that should you you should take seriously. I don't
Speaker 5: know what.
Speaker 4: Yes, And then and then you even sit there and
Speaker 4: then you can have problems with that and being like
Speaker 4: why aren't they doing this? Why aren't they doing You know,
Speaker 4: it's wonderful, didn't it.
Speaker 6: Pick Oh, like you're a purist if you're sitting there
Speaker 6: your life. They're not being legit enough because.
Speaker 4: Bah, well no, no, I mean sometimes I'm like, you know,
Speaker 4: why does everybody need to do a flip over the
Speaker 4: top rope? It is part of the spectacle and that
Speaker 4: it's coming out of that Lucha libre style, but uh,
Speaker 4: and it's just a different way of like because there's
Speaker 4: so many different ways of doing pro wrestling, it's it's
Speaker 4: remarkable that the only one that broke through to the
Speaker 4: mainstream the biggest was what Vince McMahon put for.
Speaker 5: Like the theatric character.
Speaker 4: Wrestling definitely, definitely, whereas like in Japan, they it's still
Speaker 4: immensely popular and they you know, everybody knows that it's
Speaker 4: a show, but it's like nobody it's it's it's still
Speaker 4: presented like sport, and it's much more crazy to watch
Speaker 4: and attempts to watch. And actually January fourth, they're doing
Speaker 4: their first pay per view that that is going to
Speaker 4: air in the United States and the guy that used
Speaker 4: to do play by play for the WWF is doing
Speaker 4: the play by play for who's that guy? Is that
Speaker 4: the guy that has Good Old j R? Jim Ross?
Speaker 5: Okay, who's the guy that has Burger Chain?
Speaker 4: Is that maybe mean Gene Oakley? Mean Gene?
Speaker 5: Yeah, mean Jean's Burgers they were in. There is a
Speaker 5: place in Missoula, Montana called me Jurgers.
Speaker 4: I would love to eat that. I did a show
Speaker 4: and Atlanta once. I would love to eat it. And
Speaker 4: I took a cab all the way to the outer
Speaker 4: Perimeter outside Atlanta to go to Abdullah the Butcher's House
Speaker 4: of ribs and Chinese food. Oh that's terrific. Well, it
Speaker 4: was the most MSG drenched food I've ever eaten in
Speaker 4: my life. And I couldn't stop eating it.
Speaker 5: Well that's the thing about MSG, it just can't stop.
Speaker 4: It's so good. Yeah, it felt like it was kind
Speaker 4: of I forget what neighborhood or what town it's called
Speaker 4: or whatever. What it was outside the perimeter.
Speaker 6: Do you have met any passions that equal your passion
Speaker 6: for wrestling?
Speaker 4: Oh? Comedy?
Speaker 5: So then that's what I was gonna say.
Speaker 6: You.
Speaker 4: I also love movies. You've seen You've been in my house,
Speaker 4: You've seen all those DVDs and videotapes.
Speaker 1: I have okay, all right, because I love everything.
Speaker 4: What it is is, I think people think all I
Speaker 4: do is love pro wrestling, and I do feed into
Speaker 4: that just because I think it's funny that people think.
Speaker 4: Because I think people think that I like it at
Speaker 4: all means that I'm crazy into it. But I am
Speaker 4: crazy into it, but no more so than comedy or
Speaker 4: movies or ertainment in general. For sure.
Speaker 1: It's just the thing you talk about more.
Speaker 4: Absolutely because I it's it's hysterical because literally nobody cares.
Speaker 4: You know. It's one of those things where like I'll
Speaker 4: wear like an obscure shirt just to get somebody to go,
Speaker 4: oh wow, that's really good, and then you can start,
Speaker 4: you spark up a conversation with this, you know, this
Speaker 4: oddity and it is and it is. It's funny. The
Speaker 4: more that I do it, the more that I realize
Speaker 4: how not just myself felt marginalized being a fan, but
Speaker 4: like the idea of a closeted wrestling fan, like my
Speaker 4: best friend in the world, Vince Avil, who co hosts
Speaker 4: the show with me when we watch wrestling, he would
Speaker 4: ditch out of this years ago, like like he approached me.
Speaker 4: He approached me at the taping we both did for
Speaker 4: Live of Gotham and he's like, hey, I hear you're
Speaker 4: into pro wrestling. I'm like, yeah, man, I love pro wrestling.
Speaker 4: And then he's like, hey, I'm having a WrestleMania party.
Speaker 4: We should go, and then you know, a friendship was born,
Speaker 4: like a life long friendship. But my point is is
Speaker 4: that we would be at bars or shows talking about
Speaker 4: wrestling and other comedians walk over and he's like, you know,
Speaker 4: I got to dip out of this right now, and
Speaker 4: he would just walk away because he couldn't couldn't own
Speaker 4: up to it.
Speaker 1: He was too ashamed.
Speaker 4: People make you feel a shamed, Oh a shame. Yeah.
Speaker 4: So that is a big part of the show of
Speaker 4: the podcast, and I think because a lot of non
Speaker 4: wrestling fans listen to it because and I do feed
Speaker 4: into that of like the intensity and talking about it
Speaker 4: seriously and being like, you know, I play into the
Speaker 4: I explained this a few issues back where I was like,
Speaker 4: I when we go to pwg up and Resita, I
Speaker 4: have decided in my head, like I don't start walking
Speaker 4: around like an old lady or pretend that my teeth
Speaker 4: are falling out, but I pretend that I'm an old
Speaker 4: woman in nineteen seventy six with wigs, and I am
Speaker 4: at Madison Square Garden, and I have been watching pro
Speaker 4: wrestling since the late eighteen hundreds, lady, because if you
Speaker 4: watch old pro wrestling tapes from like the sixties and
Speaker 4: especially the seventies and very early eighties, it is it
Speaker 4: is not men and is not young kids. It is
Speaker 4: in the front row. It is predominantly old women. Really,
Speaker 4: some of them are for yous at these heels. Wow,
Speaker 4: I cadt.
Speaker 5: That's amazing.
Speaker 1: That's oh yeah, there's really weird.
Speaker 4: One of my favorite clips. Oh yeah, man, oh yeah,
Speaker 4: Well you got to think of like that's the think
Speaker 4: of when it was regional before cable TV, before Vince
Speaker 4: McMahon ruined it. It was in every market in the country. Yeah,
Speaker 4: it was a regional thing. Every local TV station had
Speaker 4: basically its own wrestling that they showed. There was like
Speaker 4: all the territories were all split up between all these promoters,
Speaker 4: and then you got to see all these different acts
Speaker 4: coming to your town. But it was the local live
Speaker 4: entertainment every single week. Like in Memphis, they they would
Speaker 4: run the wrestling show every single Monday for every week
Speaker 4: of the it's it's it's it's just incredible.
Speaker 5: That's incredible.
Speaker 4: It's incredible. Yeah, that I find it in you guys
Speaker 4: want to go see that wrestling, then Jared Key loler,
Speaker 4: he ain't gonna get me, goddamn.
Speaker 5: And they don't like then, I want to keep your
Speaker 5: wrestling and your comedy separate.
Speaker 4: And I used to well, no, not necessarily, but but yeah,
Speaker 4: I don't want the comedy to become before I want
Speaker 4: it to be a pro wrestling show. But they definitely
Speaker 4: do things that are very tongue in cheek and arry,
Speaker 4: we're all in on this and we're all enjoying the
Speaker 4: show at once, which is fantastic, and that is like,
Speaker 4: it quenches such a thirst of mine. But also, if
Speaker 4: they're gonna act like the pro wrestler and they're gonna
Speaker 4: act like the referee, it is my duty to act
Speaker 4: like the fan showed up and and goddamn it, I
Speaker 4: go to beat up. I stand outside, Oh god damn
Speaker 4: day waiting to go in there and to get a seat.
Speaker 4: I'm gonna get liquered up and I'm gonna scream at
Speaker 4: those referees.
Speaker 6: Quick question, did you do Crystal Math before you got no.
Speaker 1: I love it and we used to talk about it
Speaker 1: all the time at.
Speaker 4: Work, but that is part of it. I do it
Speaker 4: because it's I know it's hysterical because who cares it's wrestling,
Speaker 4: But then it's like it is my duty to care,
Speaker 4: and it's up to me. If I don't, then then
Speaker 4: then it doesn't exist. If I don't care, pro wrestling
Speaker 4: ceases to exist. They can't do it for each other.
Speaker 4: It's not like you can't do it a basketball game
Speaker 4: where they can do it with no fans there and
Speaker 4: still have a winner.
Speaker 5: I've seen those games. There you go, you can get
Speaker 5: bootleg copies, blots.
Speaker 4: What is the point of that?
Speaker 5: What is it without the whistling? It's not I am
Speaker 5: uh yeah. I used to skateboard a lot, and I
Speaker 5: used to not talk about it because I was I
Speaker 5: thought people would think it was childish or something. And
Speaker 5: I don't know, I don't know. I don't care anymore.
Speaker 5: I used to care what people thought.
Speaker 4: I mean.
Speaker 5: Angry at everyone, but I do. I do remember there
Speaker 5: was a time when I was able to interview skateboarders
Speaker 5: for fuel, and then they wanted it to be funny,
Speaker 5: and I was like, oh, this is great. It's the
Speaker 5: colliding of both my interests, but I did not like it.
Speaker 5: I want to keep them separate. I'm serious about skateboarding,
Speaker 5: and when I was like kind of making fun of it,
Speaker 5: it did not feel good. And so maybe that's kind
Speaker 5: of maybe what Lucha Vavum is.
Speaker 6: Well, yeah, because I think they kind of a standard
Speaker 6: approach is like a sneer, Like everything doesn't have to
Speaker 6: be a sneer, and I think that's just kind of
Speaker 6: that's a TV if you're the idea is if you're
Speaker 6: going to do comedy on TV, that's how you have
Speaker 6: to approach things, like it's not cool to really like something, right, oh.
Speaker 4: No doubt. Like at PWG there are moments of irony
Speaker 4: and and it's moments of comedy, which one PWD. Yeah,
Speaker 4: it feels like they're making fun of it doesn't necessarily
Speaker 4: make they feel like they're making fun of pro wrestling maybe,
Speaker 4: but pro wrestling fans maybe.
Speaker 5: Yeah, it's that's more of a variety show, and wrestling
Speaker 5: is like one fifth of it. I think that's right.
Speaker 4: Because there's burlesque and yeah, right, and and I am
Speaker 4: not as keen on burlesque as most people.
Speaker 5: I like when girls quit burlesque and become roller Derby girls.
Speaker 4: That's cool.
Speaker 6: I like when roller Derby girls quit and become born
Speaker 6: again Christians.
Speaker 1: That's my favorite art.
Speaker 4: I just like Christians. I had to follow a burlessue
Speaker 4: act that was naked and pete in a glass and
Speaker 4: balanced it on her head. Oh wow, so I've got
Speaker 4: a chip on my shoulder? When was that? That was
Speaker 4: the mo pickens. Uh, you're a few years ago, many
Speaker 4: years ago?
Speaker 5: That's that almost seem that's pretty pornographic.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I didn't like it.
Speaker 5: No, nobody told me, hey, hope you're all into pee play. No, no,
Speaker 5: none of us are.
Speaker 4: No. That was the most upsetting part is everyone she
Speaker 4: got a standing ovation. People were there to see her
Speaker 4: do this. She walks out on stage, stark, naked as
Speaker 4: the day she was born. This hard, probably about three
Speaker 4: pounds less heavy. Then she has two glasses of white
Speaker 4: wine that she's balancing on her open palms, and she's
Speaker 4: kind of doing like a walk like Egyptian thing. I
Speaker 4: forget what kind of music was playing, because I hope
Speaker 4: that I went deaf with anger. So then she puts
Speaker 4: one glass of wine on top of her head and
Speaker 4: then chugs the other one then squats down over the
Speaker 4: empty glass peas.
Speaker 5: In that with control and without splatter.
Speaker 4: People showed people paid money to see this.
Speaker 5: Of course, were they Japanese businessmen, No, they were east
Speaker 5: they were Eastern New York scumbacks. Okay, similar interests.
Speaker 4: And then and then rince washed repeat. Then she did
Speaker 4: it with the other one, and then that at the
Speaker 4: very end, she took a baby sip of the piss
Speaker 4: oh and then scurried backstage.
Speaker 5: That's what happens in a mental hawk, and that that's
Speaker 5: when everyone's boners crawled into their bodies like turtle heads.
Speaker 4: And on their feet and wanted more.
Speaker 1: So that said, they got me.
Speaker 4: That's what That's.
Speaker 5: Why I don't that's every audience when they come to
Speaker 5: see comedy, you'd rather just be watching some naked girl
Speaker 5: drink pea.
Speaker 1: Well.
Speaker 6: Also, to me, that's like that's horrifying. That's that's a
Speaker 6: crowd mentality. That's like I'm going to do something that's
Speaker 6: that's taboo. And then everyone's having their own individual type
Speaker 6: of freak out. But it's being interpreted as positive feedback.
Speaker 1: But it's just it. No one should be peeing in
Speaker 1: a cup.
Speaker 4: So I would. I would love to talk to every
Speaker 4: single person that was there. I would love to talk
Speaker 4: to her. I would love to talk to management. But
Speaker 4: because my memory of it is that everybody loved it, huh.
Speaker 4: And then I know for a fact when I went
Speaker 4: up they hated my fucking seven minutes of joke.
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, they were like, is he just trying to
Speaker 5: be funny? I thought we were here to just see
Speaker 5: to react.
Speaker 1: Where things? Where's the scatology and all of this?
Speaker 5: Yeah? Is he gonna drink it's pee during a joke? People,
Speaker 5: that's just unprofessional as a as a performer opening for
Speaker 5: someone disgusting.
Speaker 4: You always clean your.
Speaker 5: Right, man, that's amazing.
Speaker 6: Well, you had a good show the other night at
Speaker 6: Matt and I did Jo de Rosa's show at the
Speaker 6: Belly Room at the Comedy Store.
Speaker 4: True, that place before the store.
Speaker 5: Good for you? Neither of I mean. I go there
Speaker 5: and then I'm like why am I here?
Speaker 4: And I leave.
Speaker 1: It's really bad vibes there.
Speaker 6: Although the guy that I met, the guy in the
Speaker 6: parking lot, was really nice.
Speaker 1: He got me a parking space.
Speaker 5: And honestly, the guy that books it now he used
Speaker 5: to be a waiter at the Tempe improv and he's
Speaker 5: the sweetest dude ever. He made me like a mixtape
Speaker 5: when I left because I mentioned a band on stage. Yeah,
Speaker 5: the game. Yeah. But I think that he's been there
Speaker 5: long enough to where maybe I don't know, I don't
Speaker 5: know if he's uh still I think he's still cool.
Speaker 5: But I know I don't work there, but I don't
Speaker 5: ask for stuff.
Speaker 6: I think that's a real click. You They they're the
Speaker 6: ones that do that thing of like you have to
Speaker 6: go do a certain number of sets and then be
Speaker 6: asked back and old, old this process.
Speaker 5: Then you audition in front of this decrepit lady who
Speaker 5: breathes through a tube and then or I'm not talking
Speaker 5: about anyone specific. Yeah I am, we know I am.
Speaker 5: But I can say that my uh my dad wrote
Speaker 5: jokes for her ex husband.
Speaker 1: Let's not talk about that family.
Speaker 5: Yeah, no, let's not talk about my family either. Oh
Speaker 5: look at this fancy Japanese place.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I brought you. I wanted to bring you guys here.
Speaker 5: Let's do I want to Let's do a mock karate
Speaker 5: fight there.
Speaker 1: That's kind of amazing. What does it say? It's it's
Speaker 1: probably a Buddhist home of.
Speaker 5: Us idling and looking at it. It's probably bad mojo.
Speaker 5: Let's move, let's drive straight on it.
Speaker 4: It says it's.
Speaker 1: A Buddhist temple, isn't it.
Speaker 4: How how are you temple? Chinatown, l A?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 5: Okay, really cool looking. That's a beautiful temple.
Speaker 1: Do you get to go visit that when it's in
Speaker 1: the normal daytime?
Speaker 4: I wonder, like a like their Catholic church where anybody
Speaker 4: could just waltz in during the day. They put a
Speaker 4: it doesn't feel like that.
Speaker 1: During the day, they put a termite tent, so it
Speaker 1: pays attention to it.
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's cool.
Speaker 6: I do like Chinatown in l A. It's such a
Speaker 6: weird it's kind of legit.
Speaker 4: Let's drive through that. Where's the big archway?
Speaker 1: Uh? Where is it near Union Station? I don't know
Speaker 1: what are you talking about?
Speaker 4: I don't know. I figured you'd know, you know, with
Speaker 4: the big dragon, like there's like a big statue of
Speaker 4: the goddamn dragon.
Speaker 5: Yeah, if they know what you're talking about.
Speaker 6: When we went to the show with Henry, when Henry
Speaker 6: did the episode, I think we were.
Speaker 1: By that archway.
Speaker 5: Oh yes, yes, remember that. Yeah, and it's straight out
Speaker 5: of Rush Hour too.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 4: God, yeah. Then let's then let's go through the second
Speaker 4: street tunnel that they use in the terminator. Oh oh,
Speaker 4: let's do that.
Speaker 5: We have so many sights to see.
Speaker 4: Well, you sound. Whenever I go to Santa Monica, if
Speaker 4: I've got no time, I drive down Olympic all the
Speaker 4: way back. So I go through the go past the
Speaker 4: building from die Hard.
Speaker 5: It's so fun to knocka toomy Plaza. Oh yeah, there's
Speaker 5: knocka toomy plazas here.
Speaker 4: It's like building or something.
Speaker 5: An Olympico. It's in Century city.
Speaker 4: I don't know if it's I don't think it's in centuries.
Speaker 4: I don't know what. I honestly have no idea what
Speaker 4: part of town it's in because I've never had to stop.
Speaker 4: But whatever, I'm in Santa Monica and I drive back,
Speaker 4: I take if you take Olympic.
Speaker 1: Look we're heading toward.
Speaker 5: Oh that's gotta be that's not knocha toomy Plaza.
Speaker 4: Look looks see, Karen, you knew, you knew the whole time.
Speaker 4: Those ar you are Los Angeles.
Speaker 5: Those are majestic.
Speaker 6: These majestic dragons are on Broadway if anybody wants to come, and.
Speaker 5: These are they're like the Asian style dragons, not the
Speaker 5: kind from Game of Throne.
Speaker 1: No, no, these are.
Speaker 5: Not these they're very serpentine.
Speaker 1: These are a trouble little China dragon.
Speaker 4: Oh and you know you're in trouble when you see
Speaker 4: those eyes. Isn't it unsettling that so many different cultures
Speaker 4: on the planet that never had any interaction with each
Speaker 4: other have centuries and centuries of mythology about dragons, like
Speaker 4: like England and China both like have like dragons giant.
Speaker 1: That's because they were real.
Speaker 5: Well, I mean, there's a flathead like monster where I'm from,
Speaker 5: but it turned out to be a giant Sturgist.
Speaker 1: Don't you a sturgeon.
Speaker 5: Sturgeon, it's from Sturgis. So it's Harley Davidson.
Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah, Well because that explanation that that a lot
Speaker 6: of deep lakes are connected by underground caverns and that
Speaker 6: there could be families of Brontosaurus. Yeah oh no, no,
Speaker 6: like they could have somehow lived.
Speaker 1: Kay what So it's okay, I just believe in that
Speaker 1: log nest monster. Doesn't matter what you say.
Speaker 4: I think you're absolutely right because if you consider the
Speaker 4: fact that, like we're exploring outer space when we haven't
Speaker 4: been to the bottom of the ocean. Yet that's right,
Speaker 4: that's preposterous.
Speaker 6: Eighty percent of the ocean hasn't been explored, right, eighty
Speaker 6: no doubt?
Speaker 4: Well yeah, oh wow, more than that, but I would
Speaker 4: you might even be sighting so Jacques Cousteau quote about
Speaker 4: like how because the national territory of the United States
Speaker 4: extends x amount of miles past the California coast like well, well,
Speaker 4: well into the ocean. Oh so like I think you
Speaker 4: could technically say eighty percent of the United States is
Speaker 4: still unexplored. Wow wow in those terms.
Speaker 5: Yeah, good lord, that nuts. It gives my money too,
Speaker 5: and it's all glowing with phosphorus.
Speaker 4: I guess you're Gusteau state. I don't know. I want
Speaker 4: to go and then like you do you got these
Speaker 4: giants maybe I don't. You got these giant squids that
Speaker 4: they talk about on TV that they like, they've never seen,
Speaker 4: but they like eat, you know, a giant whales and stuff.
Speaker 5: Oh that's so scary, it's crazy, it's so crazy.
Speaker 1: I love those pictures.
Speaker 6: When it's like a whale and then a diver next
Speaker 6: to the whale that looks like a tiny fly.
Speaker 4: Like I love.
Speaker 1: Perspective like that.
Speaker 6: Yeah, that's my favorite because it's such a fascinating thing
Speaker 6: of like, you know, whales are big, but you don't
Speaker 6: understand how big they are unless you've been to the
Speaker 6: Natural History.
Speaker 4: Museum and new are Oh oh well, yeah, because I
Speaker 4: got to. I was lucky growing up in that's awesome tunnel.
Speaker 4: That was the tunnel. Oh, growing up in Rhode Island.
Speaker 4: So it's like there's a you know, a maritime history
Speaker 4: and going to the aquarium, but going to the Boston
Speaker 4: uh uh Sea Museum crap. I can't even remember what
Speaker 4: it was called.
Speaker 5: I haven't been to any of that.
Speaker 1: There's another one up there, but then there's this one.
Speaker 1: Should I go to the other one?
Speaker 4: Let's do both.
Speaker 5: Okay, we're just doing tunnel stuff. This tunnel was built
Speaker 5: by a dragon.
Speaker 4: Yeah, this tunnel is no good though. It's the other
Speaker 4: tunnels the one, but let's go.
Speaker 1: Let's go to that one. Let's not. We know what
Speaker 1: tunnels are. It's not like we have to do every
Speaker 1: single tunnel.
Speaker 4: Do you know what the guy who gets into the
Speaker 4: cabin Ghostbusters, let's not, dondle.
Speaker 1: We do love movies.
Speaker 4: I love them them. I love piece of crap movies.
Speaker 1: Like shitty, like like the one that we watched that night.
Speaker 4: Poulse Beat, Pulse Beat, Pulse. I can't believe that that
Speaker 4: guy has actually been in a bunch of other stuff.
Speaker 4: I watched a couple of good movies, like he played
Speaker 4: Woody Harrelson's dad in a Kingpin.
Speaker 5: Oh yeah, that guy.
Speaker 1: Oh I didn't know that.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I just watched Kingpin.
Speaker 6: Sweeter than you who You've got to see this movie
Speaker 6: Pulse Beat Chris freak Out.
Speaker 1: Okay, so funny and stupid.
Speaker 4: Who made it?
Speaker 5: Tell me about it?
Speaker 4: It's just these two Spanish brothers wrote and directed and
Speaker 4: produced it and they never did anything else. And it's
Speaker 4: this aerobic sex comedy. Oh wow, that was shot in
Speaker 4: a racketball court. Oh my gosh, we're in the tunnel now,
Speaker 4: that's almost almost homeless homeless for homeless.
Speaker 1: Wait, what movie is this?
Speaker 4: From the Terminator? This is when they get chased by
Speaker 4: the terminator through this tunnel. The first one. Also, I
Speaker 4: think when mel Gibson uh like hangs out of the
Speaker 4: side of the cars trying to shoot somebody in the
Speaker 4: first leath the weapon, it might be in this tunnel
Speaker 4: as well. Okay, nice? And then I'm definitely not remembering
Speaker 4: a couple other things. And I like the tip of it. Yeah, space,
Speaker 4: that's I like it.
Speaker 1: It's beautiful.
Speaker 4: I wish they.
Speaker 5: Would clean it up a little.
Speaker 4: Yeah, they could fix some of it's a missing tiles.
Speaker 1: They could give it a rent.
Speaker 4: If you have ever seen in film or television, it's
Speaker 4: all very shiny, it's wonderful. Yeah, they just do that
Speaker 4: in post.
Speaker 6: I bet THX eleven forty three was shot in there
Speaker 6: a little bit.
Speaker 1: Remember that is that the first George Lucas y where it's.
Speaker 6: Robert the shaved head in a white white space. I
Speaker 6: saw that when I was seven.
Speaker 1: I believe, God.
Speaker 4: Bless you can not.
Speaker 1: Okay.
Speaker 4: My friend John Blue said to his parents he wanted
Speaker 4: to be an astronaut when he was six, so his
Speaker 4: mom rented him Space Camp and watched those by himself.
Speaker 4: So there you go. Saw Interstellar.
Speaker 5: That me too. That was that blew my pants off?
Speaker 4: Loved it.
Speaker 5: Did you think it was kind of scientology?
Speaker 4: Ishue? No, I thought it was, you know, I mean,
Speaker 4: I guess I guess it was like scientology because it
Speaker 4: struck me as a you know, the plot line if
Speaker 4: you looked at it from afar was just a trite
Speaker 4: sci fi movie. Yeah, but it was very good.
Speaker 1: Chris Christopher Nolan, scientologist.
Speaker 4: I don't know.
Speaker 5: I just do know. I don't want to blow the
Speaker 5: movie for anyone. But space ghosts.
Speaker 1: Okay, all right, that's all I haven't.
Speaker 4: Yeah, they're gonna they're gonna get a unless it was
Speaker 4: made by Warner Brothers, they are gonna get a lawsuit.
Speaker 4: People that don't space ghost, yeah they should.
Speaker 5: It's Coast to Coast.
Speaker 4: That means there's no room for space ghosts. I wish
Speaker 4: I could remember the actual space ghost thing. But yeah,
Speaker 4: of course, got to Coast. Yeah, it was great. I
Speaker 4: get a legit handed God swear Swear to God.
Speaker 1: The lopace Ghost, Jesus.
Speaker 4: Space Ghost was my favorite, along with the herculoids.
Speaker 5: It was really great.
Speaker 4: Because I, by the time, I was catching reruns of
Speaker 4: a lot of those action Hanna Barbera cartoons on Saturday
Speaker 4: mornings in the in the in the repackaging under the
Speaker 4: title of World of Superadventure, so it had herculoids, Fantastic four,
Speaker 4: Space Ghost, Birdman and the.
Speaker 1: Like, the Genie Sea lab one, yes exactly.
Speaker 5: Is that the guys with the little the Muppet people.
Speaker 6: No, Okay, they just took an old I think it
Speaker 6: was originally called Sea Lab, and then they revoiced. They
Speaker 6: used like all the different sections where's action, but then
Speaker 6: they just revoiced everything.
Speaker 1: And it is one of the funniest things I've ever seen.
Speaker 4: Amazing.
Speaker 6: It's like a real cartoon of like people that live
Speaker 6: under the sea in a in a laboratory.
Speaker 5: I really like repurposed old footage, yeah with comedy.
Speaker 1: Oh, then you got to see it.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I'm gonna watch it.
Speaker 1: It's real, real good.
Speaker 5: I'm gonna watch the dickens out of it.
Speaker 4: I really like, yeah, what.
Speaker 5: Are you gonna do? Sob oh, just oh yeah, you
Speaker 5: don't know how the world works.
Speaker 1: Lady lady really blew it, ma'am.
Speaker 4: And then she she had the and then twenty twenty we.
Speaker 5: Give a little stinki twenty twenty.
Speaker 4: We just drove past the building with those numbers. Huh.
Speaker 6: I think it's Sea Love twenty twenty one like the
Speaker 6: original was twenty twenty.
Speaker 4: Oh, I was looking at the wrong side of the
Speaker 4: street though.
Speaker 6: We could drive by. Isn't there isn't the Sunday night show.
Speaker 6: There's the one at TeX's right.
Speaker 5: Oh, certainly there have you done that one. I'm but
Speaker 5: it's been some time.
Speaker 4: But it is a show.
Speaker 6: He's the best, and what is what are other Sunday shows?
Speaker 6: I was kind of doing a route where I was
Speaker 6: pretending we were driving by Sunday night shows.
Speaker 5: Oh, of course, well let's keep doing that. I don't know, though,
Speaker 5: so I'm bad at There's certain comments that are like, oh,
Speaker 5: the five shows on Monday.
Speaker 4: I don't ever know.
Speaker 5: I never know, and so that's why my career isn't
Speaker 5: there used.
Speaker 6: To be on Cabaret on Sunday, but they moved or
Speaker 6: they are moving locations.
Speaker 5: I recall that being the name of something.
Speaker 1: This is not a good direction for us to go down.
Speaker 5: I have no idea where we are, Matt.
Speaker 4: Do you know where we are?
Speaker 5: How long have you lived here in Los Angeles?
Speaker 4: Matt? I've lived in Los Angeles just over two years.
Speaker 4: But I moved here October November first, well not November first,
Speaker 4: but I moved here November seventh, twenty twelve.
Speaker 5: And you, of course spend time as a New York
Speaker 5: comedian before that.
Speaker 4: Yes, and I lived in New York for basically fifteen years.
Speaker 5: Do you do you miss anything about being in New
Speaker 5: York comic.
Speaker 4: Yeah, knowing like something that you just said, like knowing
Speaker 4: all the rooms no yeah, places ago, no one to
Speaker 4: get there, you know, having a like because I mean,
Speaker 4: that's where my roots are, that's where I started. I've
Speaker 4: never done stand up in Rhode Island.
Speaker 5: I found it very exciting to do stand up in
Speaker 5: New York the times I've gone.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I love New York. But what do you like
Speaker 4: about being here then? Just the fact that you just yeah,
Speaker 4: the practicality of like being able to, you know, be
Speaker 4: in a car, the freedom of that, the freedom of
Speaker 4: not not relying on public transportation or the weather not sucking.
Speaker 4: The weather in New York is abysmal. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Hot, Oh yeah, humidity is that's a deal.
Speaker 4: It's I mean, I might hate it in the city
Speaker 4: when it's hot worse than when it's cold.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you know, I think I definitely do.
Speaker 4: I definitely do. I don't even know why I said,
Speaker 4: let's commit to that, because I'm also I hide from
Speaker 4: the sun. I'm very fair skinned, I have red hair.
Speaker 4: What am I supposed to do?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 6: And that humidity is like being in a sauna, but
Speaker 6: on the subway, it's like.
Speaker 4: Walking beside then and then you get a breeze and
Speaker 4: it's like walking behind a bus.
Speaker 5: And every time I've been there that the garbage people
Speaker 5: are on strike and there's just piles of fish guts
Speaker 5: moldering in the heat of.
Speaker 4: You know, it's too cold. The subway stops working. It's
Speaker 4: too hot, the subway stop working, it rains, the subway
Speaker 4: stops working for the whole weekend. I mean, it's a
Speaker 4: crisis happening in New York City. No one's doing anything.
Speaker 5: But I do remember there being piles of garbage, and
Speaker 5: it made me want to jump into them from fire
Speaker 5: I always wanted to jump off a fire escape into
Speaker 5: a pile of bags, bags of garbage, like.
Speaker 1: Off a building. Well, not just like walking back after
Speaker 1: a while.
Speaker 5: I was just walking by and diving. But I did
Speaker 5: jump off one fire escape into some garbage.
Speaker 1: Did you really.
Speaker 5: Until I hid it? There was a garbage can hidden
Speaker 5: under a bunch of piles of garbage, and I jumped
Speaker 5: on it and it was filled with fish guts, scale,
Speaker 5: blood and fish and it poured Sherwin Williams on my
Speaker 5: whole body, and I reaped, and then we went out
Speaker 5: to eat, and I just was covered in fish guts
Speaker 5: and people complained and that's.
Speaker 4: The end of my story.
Speaker 1: I want to be on your side for that, but
Speaker 1: it was the garbage.
Speaker 4: I'm not on my side.
Speaker 1: You're not either.
Speaker 4: I'm on the garbage's side.
Speaker 1: Will you be on Chris's side?
Speaker 4: Yeah? Like garbage stinks. Yeah, you're right.
Speaker 5: You know what, the more I think of it, I'm
Speaker 5: kind of on my side. All I was doing was
Speaker 5: innocently leaping into it. Why did it have to get
Speaker 5: on me?
Speaker 4: I remember a guy trying to like leap frog over
Speaker 4: a mailbox and then just shattering his ankle. Oh, I
Speaker 4: shattered a bone in my foot like I was step dancing,
Speaker 4: So I'm no better.
Speaker 1: Wow, there's so much risk.
Speaker 4: Both incidents happened in.
Speaker 1: New York City, and was garbage involved in either of them?
Speaker 4: Yeah? We were drinking. We're drinking that garbage, garbage. We
Speaker 4: were being garbage.
Speaker 6: What is your favorite, Matt, what's your favorite thing to
Speaker 6: get drunk on?
Speaker 5: Yeah?
Speaker 4: I guess beer, because because you can pace yourself yep,
Speaker 4: you know, as opposed to like whiskey. I've hopefully learned
Speaker 4: to temper my my heart alcohol intake. Yeah, Like, for instance,
Speaker 4: I will never ever again for the rest of my life.
Speaker 4: Touch Yeah, your maister.
Speaker 5: That anything with sugar. I've been drinking tequila and I
Speaker 5: find it to be a nice clean was wonderful, no hangover.
Speaker 5: Stimulating beverage and beer makes me feel blowdy and sore.
Speaker 4: But I enjoy a beer.
Speaker 6: Quila makes me feel like I've gone insane though at night.
Speaker 5: Yes, there has been these episodes lately where I've you know,
Speaker 5: gotten violent or not violent, but to threaten and maybe
Speaker 5: late at night text people that I shouldn't and things
Speaker 5: like yeah, just to get that, just to feel alive again,
Speaker 5: you know, starts sparking. Yeah, but I know that when
Speaker 5: I waked up it's an anti inflammatory.
Speaker 4: I'm just sparking it up and I'm not getting my joints.
Speaker 6: I would. I really loved. We used to drink Jameson's
Speaker 6: and cream soda. Sure, I love james My friend. Do
Speaker 6: you remember Danny Spiles.
Speaker 5: I don't remember Danny Smiles.
Speaker 6: He was he was my good friend, and he made
Speaker 6: up a drink called the IBC Missile. So it was
Speaker 6: ib C cream soda and Jamison with the Jamison's like
Speaker 6: you do this, I.
Speaker 5: Like, I like pond based drink of when serge was
Speaker 5: a popular beverage, and then it disappeared. We'd mix it
Speaker 5: with gin just by accident, and that's that's a surge
Speaker 5: in general. And and so we thought that was such
Speaker 5: a great it was such a great idea that we
Speaker 5: drank it on purpose just so we could call it that.
Speaker 5: But none of us should have been having gin.
Speaker 1: And gin is like drinking hairspray gins.
Speaker 4: That's the worst hangover I've ever had in my life.
Speaker 5: Yeah, it's got like juniper bush poison in it, right,
Speaker 5: isn't that like? Actually tear away.
Speaker 4: My godfather, God rest his soul. Danny Cooney, he loved
Speaker 4: drinking gin. He was You tell me, he's like, I
Speaker 4: love the taste of gin.
Speaker 1: Did he have bright red cheeks?
Speaker 4: Yeah? God blea. I mean his dad he had a
Speaker 4: stomach cancer. What do you think he was from it
Speaker 4: from drinking bottles of gin?
Speaker 5: Yes, the Lord blessed him.
Speaker 4: But I mean he would come by sometimes and then
Speaker 4: he would go off the radar, like he would go
Speaker 4: off the raidar some. He was my father's roommate in
Speaker 4: Providence College, and my godfather and then my godmother Jeane Cooney,
Speaker 4: God rest her soul. She died of cancer. Then he
Speaker 4: remarries another woman that he meets in a cancer survivor group. Jean,
Speaker 4: My grandpa such an amazing such an amazing heart. He
Speaker 4: would you know, he would kind of he would take
Speaker 4: in homeless people, like he had a story about a
Speaker 4: homeless guy stealing his car.
Speaker 1: You know, like he would drink with them.
Speaker 4: No, he would try to get the back on their
Speaker 4: feet and he'd be like, come use my shower, come
Speaker 4: sleep on my pull up pouch, you know. And then
Speaker 4: the guy'd be like, can I use your car? And
Speaker 4: he's like sure, Wow, what do you think I get
Speaker 4: a call from the police in Florida or something, you
Speaker 4: know that Daniel COONEYO got your car. But I mean
Speaker 4: he would he would go off the radar. Sometimes my
Speaker 4: father would not hear from him for a long time.
Speaker 4: Then he would just show up. Sometimes he would show up,
Speaker 4: you know always, I bet. I mean, like what a storyteller?
Speaker 5: Yeah, oh do you remember stories?
Speaker 4: Oh? Yeah. He once told a story about driving on
Speaker 4: the major deg in New York City with my mother
Speaker 4: and father when they were dating and hitting a dog
Speaker 4: and it dying and it was I was that's horrible, right, Yeah,
Speaker 4: My father told the story I remember hearing the story
Speaker 4: growing up, and I'm always thinking, God, that's so and
Speaker 4: like Danny Cooney wanted to pull over and take care
Speaker 4: of the dog, and my father being like, you can't.
Speaker 4: We're on a major highway. You can't pull over. You
Speaker 4: have to keep going. The dog's going. It was a
Speaker 4: terrible story. It was a life lesson when I heard
Speaker 4: him tell it at my wedding, like not during the ceremony,
Speaker 4: like everybody having drinks at the engagement party, as at
Speaker 4: matter of your dad told the wedding or no, no, no,
Speaker 4: I walked over. Danny Cooney happened to be telling the
Speaker 4: story to one of the bride'smaids.
Speaker 5: Oh, okay, he was there, Okay.
Speaker 4: In tears hysterics. I hear the part about hitting the
Speaker 4: I'm cracking the fuck up. I couldn't believe. It was
Speaker 4: the funniest thing I ever heard in my life. It
Speaker 4: was incredible. I was, I was in awe. I was,
Speaker 4: I was in awe. So the talent.
Speaker 5: Certainly his his version of the story. There is detail,
Speaker 5: comedic details added.
Speaker 4: No, it was just the way he told the way
Speaker 4: you just told it. Yeah, well he's also cracking up
Speaker 4: hysterically Okay, he had an infectious you know laugh, Yeah,
Speaker 4: that squeaky wheels. Help, oh yeah, help. But and he
Speaker 4: meant it. That's great. Yeah.
Speaker 5: I don't like it when that's someone's thing and they
Speaker 5: don't necessarily mean it, like Jimmy Fallon, where they'd like
Speaker 5: are laughing while they're talking as a defense mechanism.
Speaker 1: Everything I do on this podcast, oh stop it.
Speaker 5: You're that's You're the most genuine person in the car.
Speaker 4: That's why you're felt.
Speaker 1: And that's why I get to drive is because I
Speaker 1: laughed the most.
Speaker 4: I'm glad your daed Matt.
Speaker 5: When I drive and then podcasts, it's very difficult for
Speaker 5: me to multitask. I've said that many times.
Speaker 4: I understand, but he's.
Speaker 1: Actually done it. He's he's done the sound for the
Speaker 1: podcast while driving.
Speaker 4: At the risk of everyone's life in the car.
Speaker 1: I ever seem like we're at risk though, Will I'm
Speaker 1: an excellent driver.
Speaker 4: She's not gonna lie to you. We just covered that. Thanks,
Speaker 4: you're right. I used to do this in high school
Speaker 4: because when I was I was captain on the swim
Speaker 4: team for two years, and then we didn't have a
Speaker 4: pool facility at the high school, so it was kind
Speaker 4: of older kids who had cars and whatnot will drive underclassmen. Yep,
Speaker 4: and uh maybe in the stud that I was, Karen,
Speaker 4: my car was filled with beautiful freshman girls. And then
Speaker 4: like some of them will complain. I'd be like, you're
Speaker 4: a banned from my car? Baby?
Speaker 1: Why would they complain.
Speaker 4: About the music. They wanted to listen to Kicks one
Speaker 4: oh six and I'm like, no, we're listening to wb are.
Speaker 6: You You're like this is gonna be all rush.
Speaker 4: That's right, No, We're gonna listen to Cake. Baby. I
Speaker 4: love freshman girls.
Speaker 1: They don't know they know what's good.
Speaker 4: They don't they really kick you know, sh if everybody
Speaker 4: had turned sitting in the front seat next to me,
Speaker 4: make everybody feel special. Yeah, yeah, No, It's one of
Speaker 4: those things, like a back I had no idea how good.
Speaker 1: I had it being the captain of swimter.
Speaker 4: Sure, sure, yeah, you know, well, I.
Speaker 6: Mean that's like good. I always I really regret that
Speaker 6: I was so growing up. I had asthma, so I
Speaker 6: was never athletic, and I realized there were people that
Speaker 6: just got really good practice, like it exercise became just
Speaker 6: part of their day.
Speaker 4: That's like.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, or like.
Speaker 6: If you're on the swim team and you like, that's
Speaker 6: insane aerobic exercise for what three hours a day every day?
Speaker 4: Right? But what I also learned, and I'm really real,
Speaker 4: and it took me a long time to really believe it,
Speaker 4: is that no matter what the case is, everybody feels
Speaker 4: like shit.
Speaker 1: I think you're right.
Speaker 4: Everybody thinks that they're weird, that it's them, that it's
Speaker 4: like they're a pervert, that they're like every terrible thing
Speaker 4: that we think about ourselves is how everybody feels. And
Speaker 4: it's and it's it sounds so simple, it's too simple.
Speaker 4: It's one of those things where like it took years
Speaker 4: for it to dawn on me. Something I would say
Speaker 4: a lot like, oh, well everybody feels that way.
Speaker 6: Yeah, and be like, geez, everybody feels that I had
Speaker 6: We had a I can't remember.
Speaker 1: It was one Christmas or something.
Speaker 6: I was driving with my friend who was the most
Speaker 6: popular girl in our class.
Speaker 1: She was she always.
Speaker 6: Won like sweetheart, and she was our homecoming queen and every.
Speaker 5: Sweetheart contest she won. Sweetheart. That's a contest like.
Speaker 1: A Valentine's Day.
Speaker 4: Oh okay, I got heart dance and all that, Oh
Speaker 4: I didn't.
Speaker 5: We didn't do that.
Speaker 6: We were talking about high school and this is you know,
Speaker 6: this was three years ago, and she goes, it's weird.
Speaker 6: I just never felt like I fit in And I
Speaker 6: was like, you were the thing everyone was trying to
Speaker 6: fit in like, and it was crazy. I was just
Speaker 6: It wasn't until that moment where I realized how that
Speaker 6: it really is completely true across the board.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 5: When I talked to people I went to high school
Speaker 5: with I, They're always like telling me stories about me
Speaker 5: being awesome in some way, and I was I hated
Speaker 5: high school. I thought everyone hated me. I was angry.
Speaker 5: I didn't want to be there. I was upset every day,
Speaker 5: I thought. And then they're like, oh, someone said I
Speaker 5: used to be able to run and do a front
Speaker 5: flip and keep running. I'm like, what, I never did that.
Speaker 5: Well he saw it. Fucking Libby saw the boy. I
Speaker 5: used to do it all the time. You just run
Speaker 5: and flip and you're filled with joy. Like really, I
Speaker 5: was writing I hate my life over and over on
Speaker 5: a piece of paper. So it's all perspective.
Speaker 1: It's all choice, it's what it is. It's totally choice
Speaker 1: or schizophrenic.
Speaker 4: Well, it's a choice to no, no, no, it's certainly
Speaker 4: not to believe it, to believe that you are well,
Speaker 4: but but to believe that it then that it's bad,
Speaker 4: right when when it's not. It's not bad to have emotions,
Speaker 4: you know, it's not bad to have feelings, and it's
Speaker 4: not bad to have ideas just now figuring that out,
Speaker 4: and not.
Speaker 1: Bad to make mistakes because it's not permanent.
Speaker 6: That's the thing that's It took me forever, I think,
Speaker 6: like ten years of therapy to realize that if I
Speaker 6: had feelings or thought things were a certain way, I
Speaker 6: just had to wait an hour or a day and
Speaker 6: it was it would be completely different.
Speaker 1: It's just bizarre.
Speaker 6: When things feel bad, it feels like it's going to
Speaker 6: be that way forever, no kidding, And that's not.
Speaker 5: That's why it's so disappointing when people kill themselves.
Speaker 4: I know, let me go there. I thought I'd take
Speaker 4: it there. Well, it's true, true, that's the lie of
Speaker 4: now that's happening to me right now. It's like, well,
Speaker 4: now is forever, but it's it's it's not always going
Speaker 4: to be like this won't be like now.
Speaker 5: Or are we near the grove. What's going on?
Speaker 4: Well, they stupid punch bug. I mean, I just I'll
Speaker 4: drop dead that the woman is Asian driving that I'll
Speaker 4: drop that of shock. Like New York City introduced me
Speaker 4: to racism, Los Angeles proved to me that stereotype for all.
Speaker 1: Wait, what did she do?
Speaker 4: She was clear she was ignoring signal. I mean some
Speaker 4: of these, some of these women out here are I
Speaker 4: mean abysmal drivers. It is, and it is. I I
Speaker 4: I refuse to believe it's all Asian women, but I
Speaker 4: am confident enough to say it on a podcast all
Speaker 4: times that it is far too many of them for
Speaker 4: it to be.
Speaker 5: I don't I do notice that when I see that,
Speaker 5: and then I see it again, I always go, oh no, don't, don't,
Speaker 5: don't reinforce that.
Speaker 4: How can it be possible it's not the same women
Speaker 4: each time.
Speaker 6: I mean, there are a lot of terrible drivers in
Speaker 6: the city that.
Speaker 1: No doubt terrible are.
Speaker 4: Maybe just speaks to the amount of the fact that
Speaker 4: Asian women are the dominant person on the planet.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's right.
Speaker 4: Maybe it's just a sheer numbers game. Maybe like population population,
Speaker 4: it's Asians and women. So there you go. Face in
Speaker 4: your face.
Speaker 1: We do what we want in the car on the road.
Speaker 4: And that's what a huge that's what a person from
Speaker 4: planet Earth looks like. An Asian woman. It's not you.
Speaker 4: We're the weirdos for sure. That I love weirdos. I
Speaker 4: like it.
Speaker 5: Oh goodness.
Speaker 1: An evening with William Dafoe at the Silent movie.
Speaker 5: I have a reoccurring dream of where I am meeting
Speaker 5: Willem Dafoe and I go to shake his hand and
Speaker 5: instead he pulls it to his face and bites off
Speaker 5: my fingers.
Speaker 4: Really, and then I noticed there's gills on his neck.
Speaker 4: I don't know.
Speaker 5: I've had it a couple of times.
Speaker 1: That is the most amazing.
Speaker 5: I'm not kidding.
Speaker 1: Wow, will is part fish.
Speaker 4: He is. He's an aquatic looking.
Speaker 1: Man and he tried and he like he has. He
Speaker 1: bites your fingers off.
Speaker 5: Yeah, he just makes a scary face and he's got
Speaker 5: a big mount. Him and Tilda Swinton, I think are both.
Speaker 5: They are the sea creatures responsible for those tunnels you mentioned.
Speaker 5: They have gills, They can be underwater hours at a time.
Speaker 6: I would love to find out something that insane, just
Speaker 6: one thing like that in my lifetime, not.
Speaker 5: Like to find out that a famous actor is part fish.
Speaker 1: Yes, yeah, I just want a little something before I go.
Speaker 6: That's like that where that's a big reveal and it's
Speaker 6: not like, oh, can you believe Kim Kardashian's big, old
Speaker 6: oiled ass.
Speaker 1: Yes, I can. It's the easiest thing in the world
Speaker 1: to believe. I want something that's super unbelievable to happen.
Speaker 4: I almost got into an argument with someone over how
Speaker 4: photoshopped it was. It's so very photos I'm like, it's
Speaker 4: the most photoshopped thing in the world.
Speaker 1: Were they trying to say it it wasn't photoshop.
Speaker 4: No, They were saying, God, yeah, it's photoshop, but like
Speaker 4: like lighting and stuff, and I'm like, no, no, no, no, no,
Speaker 4: it is a different human being. Yeah, photoshopped.
Speaker 5: Yeah, her tiny little waist, the waist killed it out
Speaker 5: of here, the barbie.
Speaker 4: I don't get my period waste.
Speaker 5: I'm all hinges and no genitals or nipples.
Speaker 4: Waist.
Speaker 6: Somebody on Twitter, somebody said that it looked in the
Speaker 6: unretouched original photo it looked like her left butt she
Speaker 6: was whispering a secret to the right one.
Speaker 1: It was kind of like her weight was on the
Speaker 1: other hard.
Speaker 5: Oh you can see the untouched, not that I'm gonna
Speaker 5: look it up.
Speaker 4: I have other things to do.
Speaker 1: I have other things to What do you have to do?
Speaker 5: Oh, I have to go home and edit this podcast.
Speaker 1: Oh that's right. And you probably have laundry since you've
Speaker 1: been on the road for three weeks.
Speaker 5: I came back with clean laundry. How I did laundry
Speaker 5: on the road twice.
Speaker 4: That makes a bag lighter for three weeks.
Speaker 5: I brought just a backpack of clothes.
Speaker 4: And I washed them.
Speaker 1: What's she doing?
Speaker 5: I don't know.
Speaker 4: And love looking at people.
Speaker 1: This woman has a half she's a kid, she's like eight. Yeah,
Speaker 1: she's got some high waisted jeans and a half shirt.
Speaker 5: I think it has everything to do with her being
Speaker 5: on the street.
Speaker 4: Karen having on the phone that's probably not even on.
Speaker 5: It's just filled with candy phones.
Speaker 1: She's like, I'm gonna go I'm gonna go trick some people.
Speaker 4: I used to love to take fruit juice that came
Speaker 4: in the group. Plastic grenades what they were plastic they
Speaker 4: shape shaped like grenades, and then it had like oh I.
Speaker 5: Remember, yeah, fake grape or fake orange that is just
Speaker 5: straight up goes straight to your ankles.
Speaker 4: Yeah, and then the top. This is the best part, Karen,
Speaker 4: is the top. It would pull open like a saying Pellegrino,
Speaker 4: where like you had to so it's like you're pulling
Speaker 4: the pin on the grenade. Yeah, it's so cool.
Speaker 5: I remember that too. That would what a good memory
Speaker 5: you have.
Speaker 4: It comes, it comes in handy.
Speaker 5: Sometimes I made a promote, like when I do an
Speaker 5: art for a living, I made what looked like it
Speaker 5: was a CD rom. I just thought would be kind
Speaker 5: of a cool way to have a book of art
Speaker 5: to show people. So I used jewel cases for CDs
Speaker 5: and then ordered. But this is before people were handing over,
Speaker 5: so people got all excited. But inside I'd ordered a
Speaker 5: bunch of those bubblegum CDs. Oh yeah, so it was
Speaker 5: just a piece of bubble gum.
Speaker 1: Oh.
Speaker 5: I thought that was maybe the best marketing thing I've
Speaker 5: ever done.
Speaker 1: I've never seen bubbles.
Speaker 5: It's like twenty years old. But I don't even do
Speaker 5: that stuff now. I can't even get a T shirt
Speaker 5: whipped up for our podcast. We're gonna, yeah, I'm working
Speaker 5: on it.
Speaker 1: We're gonna make T shirts and mugs. You'll get a
Speaker 1: free one.
Speaker 5: You're gonna get a free T shirt.
Speaker 1: Because you have been a guest?
Speaker 4: Love it?
Speaker 1: Right?
Speaker 6: Should it be only guests and people who buy the
Speaker 6: T shirts or something kind of exclusive?
Speaker 4: Well, guess get it for free?
Speaker 1: I think exactly.
Speaker 4: Yes.
Speaker 1: Oh no, it's twelve ninety nine for guests.
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, that's.
Speaker 1: Friends and family discounts.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 5: Well know that when you pay that, other people civilians
Speaker 5: are paying fifteen.
Speaker 1: So yeah, it's not a bad deal.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 4: You know what's fun is like when you guys start
Speaker 4: picking up a lot of steam, you should have on
Speaker 4: a stunt man and then when the interview's over, he
Speaker 4: should roll out of the still moving car.
Speaker 5: That's a great idea.
Speaker 4: The interview is leading up to that moment.
Speaker 5: Yeah, so far, the only guest to do stunts was
Speaker 5: a Domian. He was opening and closing the door and
Speaker 5: getting out and in. Yeah, that was scary. It was
Speaker 5: very scary. It was typical Adomian. That scared me. Anytime
Speaker 5: screeching noises are behind me, you know what, it takes
Speaker 5: me back to Karen?
Speaker 4: No, you don't like cow chicken?
Speaker 5: Faithful light of what?
Speaker 4: Oh?
Speaker 5: I love sank chicken? Someone I love it?
Speaker 4: I thought maybe it was Jamie Lee. You didn't like it.
Speaker 4: We got Sangkow Chicken one night and then it was
Speaker 4: It's the best. Someone didn't like it, and I was like,
Speaker 4: this is the best. I'm confused by probably Joe. This
Speaker 4: is probably oh Joe, Oh Joe. If everybody liked it,
Speaker 4: you won't.
Speaker 6: When Matt and I worked together, he would make up
Speaker 6: songs that I think may have carried me through.
Speaker 1: They may have saved my life. And one of them
Speaker 1: was for our friend Joe de Roso, who I think
Speaker 1: you know right, I kind.
Speaker 6: Of stand up comic, and he always was complaining about
Speaker 6: everything all the time.
Speaker 1: And then when he would.
Speaker 6: Get real down and real upset, Matt would come in
Speaker 6: waving his arms back and forth, kind of like Bugs
Speaker 6: Bunny when Bugs Bunny would do the like hat and
Speaker 6: cane routine.
Speaker 4: Sure.
Speaker 1: Sure, And what was the song that you would sing
Speaker 1: to Joe.
Speaker 4: Matt, Oh Joe, I love it, Oh Joe, I love it,
Speaker 4: Oh Joe, I love it, Oh jo Jo. There was
Speaker 4: one version. It was a take off on something that
Speaker 4: a guy that wwe would sing.
Speaker 1: Oh really yes, but it's full circle.
Speaker 4: It was full circle.
Speaker 5: We've come full circle. I'm sorry we didn't take you
Speaker 5: to a high octane comedy show where you could perform
Speaker 5: and the faces off the patreot.
Speaker 4: No, let's go to a burger king. I mean, I
Speaker 4: don't want to subject the kids still listening to me,
Speaker 4: but I certainly Oh no, wait, no, Glennys is bringing
Speaker 4: me home dinner. Never minds.
Speaker 5: Didn't typhon never heard of such a dish. Wouldn't like
Speaker 5: it so much?
Speaker 1: Too much?
Speaker 5: Msgra read, i'd see I went rock and rolling.
Speaker 1: Oh I love it. What else would we talk about? Guys?
Speaker 5: Well, we are reaching the show's conclusion. I mean, time wise.
Speaker 5: I don't know why everything has to be based on time?
Speaker 6: Well, I think you know, I think people can take
Speaker 6: a certain amount of three fools in a car.
Speaker 5: Right, right, And you're like, okay, well, I'm glad you
Speaker 5: two were here around.
Speaker 4: I love that.
Speaker 5: Yeah about an hour?
Speaker 4: About an hour time for any show of substance or
Speaker 4: comedy is ninety minutes. Well, and people in America don't
Speaker 4: appreciate that, No, they really don't. Yeah, SNL gets away
Speaker 4: with it.
Speaker 1: Else can stand anything longer?
Speaker 4: Right? And then the Today's Show has then just mutated
Speaker 4: itself into this five hour just shit extra.
Speaker 5: Have again, I have a short attention stand nowadays too.
Speaker 5: I was like I saw that what too many cooks thing?
Speaker 5: And I was like seventeen minutes long and I'm like, oh,
Speaker 5: I can't sit through this, and then it melted my
Speaker 5: tits off. Yeah waiting, Oh you have home cooked meals coming?
Speaker 1: Tie food? What what food do you like to get?
Speaker 4: A burger king Matt h a double wapple cheese please.
Speaker 4: I do believe the mick rib has returned.
Speaker 5: It comes back every four.
Speaker 4: Truck month.
Speaker 1: And usually it falls right in line with Lobster Fest.
Speaker 5: Lobster Fest. Oh god, geez, biscuit. What's a biscuit? Bay
Speaker 5: canad And talks about Oh god, I ate that once
Speaker 5: and it was delicious the bit. Yeah, but it goes
Speaker 5: like like those fruit grenades. It goes straight to your
Speaker 5: big swelling ankles.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's not good for you.
Speaker 4: Let let me let me tell you something. Okay, okay,
Speaker 4: what are we on? Hollywood? Yeah, Highland and sun.
Speaker 1: Let's go down to sunset, grill and sunset.
Speaker 4: We're on Sunset. We're on Sunset. Yes, there's gonna be
Speaker 4: another burger can coming up. Oh yeah, down by you,
Speaker 4: because let me tell you something. I'm not gonna see
Speaker 4: my wife for hours and hours.
Speaker 1: Oh really, yeah, we can do a drive through.
Speaker 5: Wait, she's coming from with the home cook meal, but
Speaker 5: it's not for another couple hours exactly.
Speaker 4: Oh, we need to get you some.
Speaker 1: Because she's at work.
Speaker 4: Fancy meal coming from the restaurant.
Speaker 5: How long have you been married.
Speaker 4: I've been married three years. Do you like it? Do
Speaker 4: you love it?
Speaker 5: You love it?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 5: Good? I sometimes think I should be married. Or do
Speaker 5: you have kids?
Speaker 4: No? Do you think you're gonna make some babies?
Speaker 1: Uh?
Speaker 4: I mean we talk about it, but it's also we
Speaker 4: talk about how it's not gonna happen anytime.
Speaker 5: Soon, right, right, Well, good, you're both on the same page.
Speaker 4: You gotta have money, yeah, babies?
Speaker 6: Yeah, no, not that I don't actually know your financial situation.
Speaker 6: But in Los Angeles, doesn't it seem like you.
Speaker 1: Have to be kind of rich.
Speaker 4: It seems like you should.
Speaker 6: Yeah, like, because you're not going to send them to
Speaker 6: public school. Well, you have to be able to pay
Speaker 6: for private school.
Speaker 4: Here, I gotta I gotta pull some coin together to
Speaker 4: keep my ass alive. Yeah yeah, I mean it's fourteen
Speaker 4: bucks for dog food every few weeks.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I get I get my dogs.
Speaker 6: The Rachel Ray kind and every time, I'm like, this
Speaker 6: is just the same ship as all the other stuff.
Speaker 6: You're just buying it because Rachel raised names on it
Speaker 6: and paying ten extra dollars. But the other stuff, I'm
Speaker 6: afraid is made of ashes or bones or whatever. You know,
Speaker 6: they always have like everyone guys dog food.
Speaker 4: Bones.
Speaker 6: Yeah, they're like, I think it was iems came out
Speaker 6: and they like, but they had a huge recall because
Speaker 6: it was all literally they make their dog food out
Speaker 6: of ash?
Speaker 5: Did they do? They also run a crematorium and then
Speaker 5: they got confused. I labeled a bag dog, but I
Speaker 5: didn't realize in that bag was actual dog remains. And god,
Speaker 5: there's a mix up in the food conveyor belt and
Speaker 5: that's awful.
Speaker 1: Now dogs are all cannibals.
Speaker 5: Well, I know that I can't afford to have a baby,
Speaker 5: because I quite I can myself. Only I eat baby
Speaker 5: food because I'm so poor.
Speaker 4: I'm living on baby food. There's some joy really yeah.
Speaker 4: And then there's a soul coughings. Yeah, that's amazing. And
Speaker 4: there's a soul coughing song. Uh I think what did
Speaker 4: they call it? The Long Island Lolita? Yeah? Yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 4: Well he said by like Dody starts screaming that. At
Speaker 4: one point at the end of the song, he's like,
Speaker 4: I'm living on baby food. She's a liar. Everything she
Speaker 4: says is a lie.
Speaker 6: That story was so crazy because that was kind of
Speaker 6: pre tabloid TV and everything.
Speaker 4: That really set it off. It was really set it.
Speaker 1: Off for total insanity. Married Joe Buttafuo because up.
Speaker 4: Until that point it was I feel like it was
Speaker 4: always just celebrities and then wild local news stories were
Speaker 4: just kind of crime and whatnot. But then that that
Speaker 4: became the living soap opera. Yes, that that fucked the
Speaker 4: news industry forever. Yeah, especially New York. That and the
Speaker 4: Jongy right, and it felt like they were on top
Speaker 4: of each other. And then Nancy Kerrigan forget it. Now
Speaker 4: you've got a magnus open, the Young Gun, the Long
Speaker 4: Island Leader, the Young Gun, the Long Island Lolita. That's
Speaker 4: the new I think that's a song that it's definitely
Speaker 4: in the song. That's why I know.
Speaker 1: We are passing in Big Arby's.
Speaker 4: I had Arby's the other night and I'm not proud.
Speaker 4: It didn't give me doesn't terrible digestive?
Speaker 5: Doesn't there roast beef come out of a cocking gun.
Speaker 4: I hope, so, I hope that's what that was. I
Speaker 4: asked the young man to shoot the roast beef into
Speaker 4: my mouth from across the room, and then I closed
Speaker 4: my eyes and I assumed everything went to plan.
Speaker 5: Arch that pink stuff right into my face.
Speaker 4: Sir, shoot that roast beef gun into my face, young man,
Speaker 4: shoot it from across the room.
Speaker 1: We're not allowed to do that.
Speaker 4: Okay, okay, missed this is on you missed it. And
Speaker 4: then it was I also remember at the time, like
Speaker 4: on Comedy Central they did like somebody did a song
Speaker 4: that they would play a lot about Joey Butterfu and
Speaker 4: like the background, it was like like the guy going
Speaker 4: like like what it transcended, and then it was like
Speaker 4: him singing the song about that that it transcended a
Speaker 4: news story. It became part of America.
Speaker 1: Yes, yes, you're exactly right.
Speaker 4: Like the Kennedy assassination that people try to say nine
Speaker 4: to eleven was my generation's Kennedy assassination. It was do
Speaker 4: you remember Joe and and and what was the girl's names?
Speaker 4: And Amy Fisher trying to shoot Mary Joe Butterfugo and
Speaker 4: the the head not trying to shoot shot her that
Speaker 4: is successfully successfully, but she wouldn't go down. That's right.
Speaker 4: And what was the famous joke? Do we all remember? Oh,
Speaker 4: knock knock, who's there? Bang? Bang, Amy Fisher, you're dead?
Speaker 4: Oh god, what a classic.
Speaker 1: We're about to go through the burger king drive through?
Speaker 1: Should we wrap it up?
Speaker 5: Let's wrap it up like we're gonna eat.
Speaker 4: I'm not gonna eat it. I think people want to
Speaker 4: hear this experience. Oh unless they don't.
Speaker 1: Well, how long are over? Over?
Speaker 4: Are we so over? We are over? It's over. It's over.
Speaker 5: Oh that's a bad move, Cresscross.
Speaker 4: Let's just go through the drive through. You're gonna get
Speaker 4: emails people saying like what happened? What?
Speaker 6: I bet?
Speaker 5: We're going to order some food and then make some
Speaker 5: snarling noises.
Speaker 1: Would you have any shows come up you want to plug?
Speaker 4: I can't think of any off the top of my head.
Speaker 5: It's always it's a hard question. I never can't either.
Speaker 5: And then you're done and you're like, wait, I have
Speaker 5: one in twenty minutes. I uh go on iTunes give
Speaker 5: us a good rating, right, that's the thing you're supposed
Speaker 5: to say that, and thank you.
Speaker 1: We watch wrestling.
Speaker 4: We watch wrestling? Oh, of course, go to we watch
Speaker 4: Wrestling podcast dot com. That's what I'm gonna do. And
Speaker 4: also good iTunes. I have my stand up CD that
Speaker 4: I put out a few years ago, Come Clean, and
Speaker 4: you can listen to that. I want to hear that.
Speaker 1: There you go. That's a real plug. That's the plug
Speaker 1: we're looking for.
Speaker 5: Did you go to uh Julia W. Harrison who's helping them?
Speaker 4: Oh? Yes, all things comedy revitalizing.
Speaker 5: Our desire julyah and uh, this has been terrific and
Speaker 5: you've been listening to.
Speaker 4: Do you need a ride? D y n A r.
Speaker 1: I N you want to way back?
Speaker 2: Either want to be there, doesn't matter how much bagg
Speaker 2: this time? And daid urman alingay do want to send
Speaker 2: you off inside?
Speaker 1: Do you want to welcome you back home? Tell us
Speaker 1: all about every scared he was?
Speaker 3: It fine?
Speaker 1: Now porn?
Speaker 3: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 4: Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?
Speaker 1: Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?
Speaker 4: Do your need ride to ride? Do you need with
Speaker 4: Karen and Chriss