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Speaker 1: Hey, lady, is doctor dom here. If you like this

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Speaker 1: show and you want to make your own, let me

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Speaker 1: tell you about the free platform Anchor. It's a creation

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Speaker 1: right from your phone or computer. You can add songs

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Speaker 1: from Spotify and create any type of content that you

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Speaker 1: are looking for. Anchor will distribute it all for you

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Speaker 1: so it can be heard on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and more.

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Speaker 1: Download the free Anchor app or go to anchor dot

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Speaker 1: fm to get started.

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Speaker 2: You on this week's episode of Cultivating her Space. Midwives

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Speaker 2: come in and they create a safe space, and they

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Speaker 2: are not doing that when they first meet you, when

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Speaker 2: you're in labor. The community building is happening before you

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Speaker 2: and even get to that point. Today's episode is sure

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Speaker 2: to provide you with motivation, inspiration, or a fresh perspective.

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Speaker 2: If you have any AHA moments or appreciate anything from

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Speaker 2: this episode, please leave us a review to let us

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Speaker 2: know we're on the right track. Also, we release episodes

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Speaker 2: every Friday, so be sure to subscribe on iTunes and

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Speaker 2: visit cultivatingheirspace dot com to access our exclusive after show

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Speaker 2: and other bonus content from the Patreon tab.

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Speaker 1: Welcome to Cultivating her Space, a podcast dedicated to uplifting

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Speaker 1: women like you.

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Speaker 3: We're your hosts.

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Speaker 1: Doctor Dominique Bussard, a college professor and psychologist.

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Speaker 2: And Terry Lomax, a techie and motivational speaker. In a

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Speaker 2: world where black women are often misrepresented and misunderstood, please

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Speaker 2: join us as we initiate authentic conversations on everything from

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Speaker 2: fibroids to fake friends, and create a safe space where

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Speaker 2: black women can just.

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Speaker 1: Be Hey, lady, is doctor dom here from the Cultivating

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Speaker 1: her Space podcast? Are you currently a resident of the

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Speaker 1: state of California and contemplating starting your therapy journey? Well,

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Speaker 1: if so, please reach out to me at doctor Dominique

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Speaker 1: Brusard dot com. That's d R D O M I

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Speaker 1: N I q U E B R O U S

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Speaker 1: s r D dot com to schedule a free fifteen

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Speaker 1: minute consultation. I look forward to hearing from you.

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Speaker 2: You Hey lady. Before we jump into the episode, were

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Speaker 2: just going to let you know that we've ran into

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Speaker 2: some technical issues, so the audio isn't the best, but

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Speaker 2: we hope it doesn't take away from the message. Please

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Speaker 2: be patient with us, and thank you as always for

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Speaker 2: listening and supporting. All right, let's get into the episode.

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Speaker 2: All Right, lady, we have two very special guests that

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Speaker 2: I absolutely love and adore today in Cultivating her Space.

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Speaker 2: We have my doulas. Deandra Hunden and Stephanie Dixon are

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Speaker 2: the founders of Bear with Me, a mother daughter doula duo.

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Speaker 2: Both San Francisco Natives and Bayview Hunter's Point residents, this

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Speaker 2: duo strives to reclaim the role of black birth workers

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Speaker 2: in America while advocating from maternal equality for all. Some

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Speaker 2: of DeAndre and Stephanie's responsibilities include working with midwives, dulas,

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Speaker 2: and other board members to foster communication between low income

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Speaker 2: people and people of color. They also work as dulas

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Speaker 2: and childbirth educators through their formal partnerships with the medical

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Speaker 2: staff at UCSS San Francisco Department of Public Health and

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Speaker 2: Sister Web Community DULA program. Their business is based in

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Speaker 2: San Francisco and serves a wide range of clients across

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Speaker 2: the Bay Area. Deandra and Stephanie, welcome to Cultivating her Space.

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Speaker 2: Thank you, thank you, thanks for having us.

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Speaker 3: It's going to be so much fine. Yes, we're so excited.

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Speaker 2: We're so excited you're here. So excited to be here.

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Speaker 2: Thank you for having us.

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Speaker 1: Yes, I am looking forward to this conversation. I think

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Speaker 1: it's a really, really important one that we need to have,

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Speaker 1: and so I want to start us with our quote

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Speaker 1: of the day. It's not just the physical act of

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Speaker 1: giving birth that holds the most powerful memories for women.

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Speaker 1: It's how the people around her made her feel and

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Speaker 1: the way she was cared for before, during, and after birth.

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Speaker 1: I'm going to read that one one more time for

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Speaker 1: the people in the back. Let that one sink into

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Speaker 1: our hearts and minds. It's not just the physical act

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Speaker 1: of giving births that holds the most powerful memories for women,

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Speaker 1: it's how the people around her may feel and the

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Speaker 1: way she was cared for before, during and after birth. Ladies,

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Speaker 1: when you hear this quote, I mean when I hear it,

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Speaker 1: I immediately think of the powerful work that you two

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Speaker 1: are doing.

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Speaker 4: But when you hear it, I want to know what

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Speaker 4: comes up for you.

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Speaker 5: I'll start and saying, when I hear that quote, that

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Speaker 5: is the definition of a DOA.

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Speaker 3: That's exactly what it is.

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Speaker 5: It's the work we do that positively affects and makes

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Speaker 5: up that birthing person feel amazing and cared for and

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Speaker 5: loved before, during, and after birth. That is the definition

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Speaker 5: in that quote of the work that we do. That's

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Speaker 5: what I thought.

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Speaker 6: It's very similar to what I was thinking as well,

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Speaker 6: which is I thought about all the rooms in the

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Speaker 6: spaces and places is that we were in and the

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Speaker 6: people that we supported, and yeah, that's us as do

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Speaker 6: us in that space.

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Speaker 2: Now, can you all, I know this might be interesting

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Speaker 2: because you probably both have different I'm sure you have

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Speaker 2: different origin stories, but can you talk a little about

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Speaker 2: your origin story and what inspired you to begin this

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Speaker 2: journey of being a birth worker.

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Speaker 3: Let's do it in the order. Let's do it in

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Speaker 3: this who came first? Right?

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Speaker 5: Because now I know Stephanie knows having a daughter of

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Speaker 5: her own, a child of her own, now that that

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Speaker 5: whatever she does, you know her daughter does it because

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Speaker 5: she did it.

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Speaker 3: So therefore whatever you did, it's because I did it. Okay,

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Speaker 3: So here we go.

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Speaker 5: So my origin story is is this. Ever since I

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Speaker 5: was a little child, I wanted to be a birth worker.

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Speaker 5: I thought that was a medical doctor that delivered babies

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Speaker 5: and didn't happen initially, as I grew older and grew up,

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Speaker 5: and because really largely I thought I didn't have any

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Speaker 5: role I didn't have any role models, so I thought

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Speaker 5: to following the footsteps of being a birthworker slash eventually doulah,

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Speaker 5: but at the time delivering babies. And quite honestly, it

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Speaker 5: wasn't until I was turning fifty. I was sitting in

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Speaker 5: my living room trying to decide what I wanted to

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Speaker 5: do with the second half of this amazing life. And

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Speaker 5: maybe if this gets her she hasn't already listened to

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Speaker 5: the podcast.

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Speaker 3: I literally heard Oprah.

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Speaker 5: Winfrey come through my TV and say, what do you

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Speaker 5: want to do with the.

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Speaker 3: Rest of your life?

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Speaker 5: Come to my workshop to be and live your best life.

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Speaker 5: And I said, okay, I'm gonna sign up and get

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Speaker 5: certified and be a doula.

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Speaker 3: That's my story.

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Speaker 2: So, DeAndre, you started the journey at fifty years old,

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Speaker 2: that's when you decided.

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Speaker 3: I started the journey at fifty years old, that is

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Speaker 3: and how that hired. Thank you, thank you, thank you, Wow.

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Speaker 2: And so inspired again, school.

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Speaker 3: I can start over and do something that's kind of

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Speaker 3: amazing because now I'm only twenty five, so I don't

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Speaker 3: know how that works.

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Speaker 4: There you go, but you know, I think that's so beautiful.

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Speaker 6: And powerful because my inspiration for becoming a doula does

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Speaker 6: come for you, and it comes from you, because I

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Speaker 6: watched you have faith, and I watched you take a leap,

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Speaker 6: and I watched you go into a line of work

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Speaker 6: that you were passionate about, and seeing your passion in

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Speaker 6: the work ultimately motivated me after having Zuri. Having Zuri

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Speaker 6: was my motivation for stepping into this work. I knew

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Speaker 6: I wanted to educate other people about my experience and

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Speaker 6: share with them what I learned, and so I started

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Speaker 6: off as a childbirth educator, but ultimately becoming a doula

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Speaker 6: because I felt like I was missing out.

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Speaker 2: A little bit and I wanted to be there. I

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Speaker 2: wanted to be in the room. I wanted to take

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Speaker 2: what I was teaching and actually be able to fight. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: thank you, t Okay.

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Speaker 7: I'm not trying to interrupt the show, but I had

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Speaker 7: this random idea I want to share with you and

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Speaker 7: I don't want to forget it.

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Speaker 2: Tell me, tell me what is it? Okay?

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Speaker 7: So you know how at the start of every New year, birthday,

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Speaker 7: new moon, anniversary, new month, new anything, people find themselves

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Speaker 7: wanted to have a reset, but they're not sure where

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Speaker 7: to start?

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Speaker 2: I sure do? What are you thinking?

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Speaker 4: What if we.

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Speaker 7: Hosted a workshop where we could interact with our listeners

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Speaker 7: to talk about stuff like self care and self love.

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Speaker 2: Oh and gee, and we could even have a session

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Speaker 2: about manifestation, leaving toxic relationships and becoming our best selves. Girl,

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Speaker 2: I am so excited. I'm sold. We could call it

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Speaker 2: the Vibrate Higher Empowerment Workshop.

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Speaker 7: Yes, yes, yes, that is it. And we could even

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Speaker 7: host our live quarterly wind down to check in and

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Speaker 7: build community as we vibrate hire all year.

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Speaker 1: Yo.

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Speaker 3: I love it, I love it. I'm so let's do it.

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Speaker 2: Lady. If this sounds like fun to you, visit New

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Speaker 2: Year Workshop dot com and join us for the Vibrate

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Speaker 2: Higher Empowerment Workshop. If you want to release baggage, set intentions,

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Speaker 2: and manifest the life you desire, this is just for you, lady.

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Speaker 7: That's New Year Workshop dot com.

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Speaker 4: We can't wait to connect with you, lady. As you

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Speaker 4: are listening.

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Speaker 2: You know.

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Speaker 1: Deandra Stephanie Terry like they have a relationship. So it's like,

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Speaker 1: so I'm coming in and I am just in awe

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Speaker 1: of the connection. That mother daughter bond that the two

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Speaker 1: of you have is so it's so beautiful. Oh so, lady, Okay, okay, lady,

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Speaker 1: if you if you're listening, then you really have to

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Speaker 1: go and subscribe on Patreon so that you could see

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Speaker 1: the video, like you have to just see.

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Speaker 4: It's not going to be enough for you to listen

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Speaker 4: to us, like you have to see this. It is beautiful.

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Speaker 1: So I want to take us back just a little

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Speaker 1: bit because I heard a few terms, and I know

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Speaker 1: what they mean after being in conversation with you all,

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Speaker 1: but I want our listeners to know what these terms mean.

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Speaker 1: So I heard doula, I heard midwife, I heard birth worker,

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Speaker 1: I heard childbirth educator.

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Speaker 3: Did I catch them all? Okay, got them? You've got them?

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Speaker 4: So what what? What are all of.

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Speaker 3: Those different terms?

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Speaker 2: I'll starting with childbirth educator and then as a week

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Speaker 2: of work or away.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I think that's the perfect, that's perfect.

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Speaker 2: A childbirth educator is someone who is trained in childbirth education.

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Speaker 6: So they are the person that's coming in and teaching

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Speaker 6: the birthing person and their partner and their family everything

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Speaker 6: from pregnancy to labor and birth, postpartum and beyond. And

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Speaker 6: it is our job to be like a wealth of

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Speaker 6: knowledge and information because Essentially we're the teachers. And if

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Speaker 6: you can imagine going into like a labor and birth

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Speaker 6: class or a pre natal class that you would take.

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Speaker 2: Before you're in labor. Essentially, that's what a childbirth educator does,

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Speaker 2: is we create that space, we cultivate it, we bring

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Speaker 2: you in when we inform and educate and empower you

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Speaker 2: on the different stages and what you can't expect.

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Speaker 5: So birth worker, let me just get to it. So

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Speaker 5: the if you look up the definition of doulah, the

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Speaker 5: definition and the dictionary will have some words in there

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Speaker 5: that often more and more now as a birth worker

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Speaker 5: of color, we are not subscribing to and some of

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Speaker 5: those words in there is that it is a woman

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Speaker 5: who is actually slaving to support other women. Right, So

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Speaker 5: because of that that that definition of that that word

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Speaker 5: being within the definition, often more and more doulas of

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Speaker 5: color are removing ourselves from the term doula and birth

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Speaker 5: worker birth keeper are words.

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Speaker 3: That we're starting to replace with the word dola.

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Speaker 2: That's super helpful, So thank you for that educational tip,

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Speaker 2: and hopefully as time goes on that we'll trance will

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Speaker 2: kind of transition from using doula to birth worker. The

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Speaker 2: other question was midwife, because I know that people use

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Speaker 2: a midwife interchangement working difference between a doulah and an.

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Speaker 3: All birth worker and a midwife. Yeah, so a midwife.

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Speaker 6: Is the first and who is trained and highly skilled

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Speaker 6: in obstetrics, and so they are the person that is

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Speaker 6: there actually, if you can imagine, to catch your baby.

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Speaker 6: The doula is the person who may be that constant

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Speaker 6: person that's there from the moment you say I need

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Speaker 6: you through pushing, through the birth of your baby into postpardon,

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Speaker 6: and a midwife would work closely with the duel also

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Speaker 6: to be in communication about where you're at.

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Speaker 2: And ideally they'll come in.

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Speaker 6: Closer to that pushing stage because they really want to

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Speaker 6: be there to monitor what's happening before to check dilation.

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Speaker 6: Sometimes they come in and out to check dilation depending

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Speaker 6: upon how you're progressing. But essentially they are the ones

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Speaker 6: that are there to catch your baby, and they're providing

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Speaker 6: the emotional, physical support, the mental support, the spiritual support,

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Speaker 6: and they are also a part of cultivating that space

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Speaker 6: and that community around you that they're there with an

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Speaker 6: obstetrics lens so they can do all the things that

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Speaker 6: adula cannot do because we're not trained in et cetera.

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Speaker 5: The midwife as definitely, as you said. When I hear

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Speaker 5: you saying that the midwife visually, I'm always thinking they're

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Speaker 5: the ones that checking the blood pressure. They're the ones

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Speaker 5: that are going to see whether or not you're dialects

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Speaker 5: that are actually going to do physical exams.

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Speaker 3: We're doulas, we or not we're not.

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Speaker 5: So that is I would say the biggest Stephanie's defining

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Speaker 5: the biggest differences. It's that midwife is going to do

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Speaker 5: hands on medical touch. Doulas we're not going to do

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Speaker 5: hands on metaphlage.

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Speaker 2: That makes perfect sense, that preference, it's super helpful. And

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Speaker 2: then let's talk a bit about why black women are

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Speaker 2: at high risk of dying from pregnancy and childbirth, because

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Speaker 2: I know that this is something that inspired me to

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Speaker 2: go the route of having a midwife from a doula.

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Speaker 2: It's the fact that this is a statistic, right, like

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Speaker 2: that's real and we see it often in media and

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Speaker 2: you know, people personal experiences. I'm sure when we listen

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Speaker 2: to the podcast, so can we talk a bit about

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Speaker 2: why that's the case for black women.

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Speaker 5: I want to frame a little bit that in the

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Speaker 5: United States we spend the least amount of money on

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Speaker 5: women's health issues and women's health care, And I think

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Speaker 5: that's important to understand when we think of all the

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Speaker 5: different ways as country spends money and all the different

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Speaker 5: things we do, but women's health care and specifically birth

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Speaker 5: research is at one of the lowest percentages of money

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Speaker 5: spent on research is for women's care in birth. So

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Speaker 5: to tear it to your question, that really totally connects

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Speaker 5: to why studies are really have been really hard and

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Speaker 5: difficult to get big, bold studies done on birth and

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Speaker 5: birth outcomes in this country, but specifically black women because

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Speaker 5: as if you think about who's going to get the

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Speaker 5: money spent, black women at the bottom, bottom of that

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Speaker 5: of the spending category, the pass of the time, the staff.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 6: No, I believe that another factor or a couple factors

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Speaker 6: that play into that when.

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Speaker 2: We think about why black women are at high.

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Speaker 6: Risk of dying in pregnancy and childbirth in hospital settings

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Speaker 6: is because there are two themes. I think that meat,

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Speaker 6: which is this theme of implicit bias, and then what

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Speaker 6: I've learned is medical racism. And when they meet, unfortunately,

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Speaker 6: they create the perfect recipe for what we're seeing is

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Speaker 6: that black women are dying through to four times more

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Speaker 6: likely than their white counterparts. So when we say implicit bias,

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Speaker 6: we mean the stereotypes and the preconceived notions that are

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Speaker 6: being brought into the room, which we know are rooted

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Speaker 6: in a lot of slavery and systemic race that we've

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Speaker 6: seen over time, hundreds of years. And so the black body,

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Speaker 6: the female body, is viewed as something that can be

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Speaker 6: picked at and prouded and poked apart because we've been

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Speaker 6: examined for years, our bodies have been used for it

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Speaker 6: to be examined for medical purposes, and so.

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Speaker 2: We are seen as human beings. We're seen as a project.

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Speaker 2: So when we make a complaint or we bring a concern.

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Speaker 6: To to something that we're feeling or something that's happening within

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Speaker 6: our body, it's not taking it seriously.

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Speaker 2: And the lens that it's seen through is one.

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Speaker 6: From a medical perspective rather than a human perspective. I'm

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Speaker 6: telling you that I am in pain, I'm telling you

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Speaker 6: that I am uncomfortable, and so those things get overlooked,

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Speaker 6: and we've seen that, and I think one of the

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Speaker 6: most popular stories that's developed and grown over time amongst many.

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Speaker 6: But because this person is a celebrit As Serena Williams's

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Speaker 6: story in her blood clotty that she experienced is a

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Speaker 6: direct result of that she is an athlete, a top

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Speaker 6: performing athlete. So if you can imagine a provider coming

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Speaker 6: in with this preconceived notion that she's the strong woman

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Speaker 6: on top of the implicit bias, on top of the

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Speaker 6: medical racism that they've been brought.

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Speaker 2: Up in that's seeped in the room and in the

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Speaker 2: care it's overlooked, and so that is like that perfect

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Speaker 2: recipe for unfortunately a lot of our women and a

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Speaker 2: lot of our people dying in childbirth or an immediate

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Speaker 2: post party.

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Speaker 6: Those are the themes that I feel like we have

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Speaker 6: to continue to pay close attention to and to continue

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Speaker 6: to dissect and break down and educate people on because

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Speaker 6: from my experience, that's where a lot of it comes from,

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Speaker 6: and that's where a lot of it is rooted. And

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Speaker 6: in addition to what you're saying about economic differences, which

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Speaker 6: available resources and information.

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Speaker 5: And that's a hundred of course, one hundred percent correct.

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Speaker 5: And what third piece I would add is that you

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Speaker 5: know many of us are aware of the twenty sixteen

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Speaker 5: CDC studies. So again, this was the largest study around

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Speaker 5: birth specifically to black women and within the realm of

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Speaker 5: biases and prejudice approaches to thinking about people is for years,

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Speaker 5: until this research was done, the thought was that it

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Speaker 5: was low uneducated Black women who had horrible birth outcomes.

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Speaker 3: That's that's what the belief was is if you were.

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Speaker 5: Uneducated in low income, yeah, that's why you were having

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Speaker 5: these bad birth outcomes. And again with this this report

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Speaker 5: in twenty sixteen, and there are other studies that continue

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Speaker 5: to happen, but they're continuing to happen because doulas and

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Speaker 5: midwives and others of color are pushing up against the

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Speaker 5: system and are continued to ask and demand for more

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Speaker 5: research and study. But the twenty sixteen study is the

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Speaker 5: one in which we learned about the inadequacies between black.

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Speaker 3: Women and white women.

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Speaker 5: And because of this report, we've been able to point

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Speaker 5: to something. And that's unfortunate that it's not enough, because I,

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Speaker 5: as a black woman saying said it. But it has

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Speaker 5: to be this huge support that really kind of pulled

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Speaker 5: the ugliness from the back and put it to the front.

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Speaker 3: So that's our answer.

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Speaker 1: You were questioning about Yeah, thank you for that. You know,

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Speaker 1: I know that, like I had seen, I'd heard Serena

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Speaker 1: Williams story, and then I started hearing from lots of

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Speaker 1: other black women and who have had similar experiences where

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Speaker 1: they were ignored. What they said, you know, in the

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Speaker 1: doctor's office is ignored by white and black positions alike. Correct,

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Speaker 1: And so I think that the work you all are

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Speaker 1: doing is so incredibly important. But I want to talk

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Speaker 1: about misconceptions because I think a lot of times, in

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Speaker 1: particularly within the Black community, when there are things in

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Speaker 1: mainstream culture, like misconceptions in that are put out in

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Speaker 1: mainstream culture, we tend to buy into those misconceptions or

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Speaker 1: believe those misconceptions, right, So one of them being that

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Speaker 1: you have to be rich and white to have a midwife,

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Speaker 1: to have a doula or a birth worker, or to

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Speaker 1: have a berth.

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Speaker 4: Outside of the hospital setting. And so I guess my.

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Speaker 1: Question is what are some of the biggest misconceptions that

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Speaker 1: you all are aware of around home births.

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Speaker 5: I'll start by saying, when I was sharing my story

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Speaker 5: about becoming a doula, I said in this conversation that

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Speaker 5: I thought there were I had no role models I

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Speaker 5: thought I had no role models, And as my story

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Speaker 5: moves forward and continues, I actually learned that I did

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Speaker 5: have a role model, and that was our aunt Hattie May.

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Speaker 5: And Aunt Hattie May was the midwife, was the doula

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Speaker 5: in our small town in which my father grew up.

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Speaker 5: In fact, we learned that on Hattie May delivered all

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Speaker 5: the babies.

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Speaker 3: In town, white, black, everyone in between and in the middle.

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Speaker 5: So once we got into birth work and did our

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Speaker 5: own family research, we found out that we come we're

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Speaker 5: standing on shoulders of our family members who were doulas

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Speaker 5: and midwives. So I want to say that because to

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Speaker 5: leap into the why and to answer to talk about

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Speaker 5: the misconceptions. That's a huge misconception right there, that dualism

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Speaker 5: midwives were.

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Speaker 3: White all white. Oh my gosh.

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Speaker 5: No, you know there is if if if you're listeners

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Speaker 5: and readers haven't delve into some research, folks should dive

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Speaker 5: into and answer and research what were granny midwives granny

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Speaker 5: midwives in this country as our aunt Taddy May.

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Speaker 3: Were delivering the babies of this country.

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Speaker 5: But it wasn't until white males saw the potential profit.

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Speaker 3: Because there's there's there's two.

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Speaker 5: Things we built to the hospital for or pretty much

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Speaker 5: guarante two things are guaranteed in our lives, birth and death.

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Speaker 5: So they had the death on lockdown. But they had

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Speaker 5: to get in into the birth business. So how this

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Speaker 5: country got into the birth business was to put rumors

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Speaker 5: out about being fearful of the granny midwives, put rumors

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Speaker 5: out about that they weren't educated and capable to deliver

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Speaker 5: deliver your child. Put rumors out that if you do

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Speaker 5: have a granny midwife deliver your baby, you and your

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Speaker 5: baby may not survive. Intentional shut them down in this country.

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Speaker 5: So that's where the gap started. That's where the gap

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Speaker 5: of the misconception that black people weren't birth workers and

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Speaker 5: that was an intentional shutdown.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I would say that's a lot where a lot

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Speaker 2: of the propaganda around birthing at home being unsafe came from.

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Speaker 6: Because, as we said before, midwives are trained, highly skilled,

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Speaker 6: highly educated in obstetrics. They know how to catch babies,

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Speaker 6: they know what to look for, they know how to

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Speaker 6: monitor heartbeats, they know how to do all the things

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Speaker 6: that you're a provider or know how to do in

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Speaker 6: a hospital setting. Now, I think what is different obviously

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Speaker 6: is the technology right, You're not. In most cases, depending

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Speaker 6: upon what type of midwife you're working, if, you may

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Speaker 6: not have the same technology at home as you would

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Speaker 6: at a birth center or at a hospital. And so

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Speaker 6: I think the idea of that technology not being there

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Speaker 6: to intercept something that could possibly happen is a fear

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Speaker 6: based approach to thinking about home births.

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Speaker 3: Midwives come in and.

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Speaker 2: They create a safe space, and they are not doing

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Speaker 2: that when they first meet you, when you're in labor.

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Speaker 6: The community building is happening before you even get to

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Speaker 6: that point. The monitoring and the checking in, the health

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Speaker 6: measures that are taking place, all of those things are

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Speaker 6: happening before we even get to lady. I think there's

440
00:27:05,960 --> 00:27:08,919
Speaker 6: this thought that like, you just go into berth and

441
00:27:08,960 --> 00:27:12,560
Speaker 6: then your midwife just randomly shows up. No, there's a

442
00:27:12,600 --> 00:27:15,720
Speaker 6: lot that's being happened, that's happening that's taking.

443
00:27:15,480 --> 00:27:17,720
Speaker 2: Place before we even get to that point. So I

444
00:27:17,760 --> 00:27:19,040
Speaker 2: just I want to go back to the fact that

445
00:27:19,080 --> 00:27:24,160
Speaker 2: here they are highly skilled and educated professional that hav

446
00:27:24,200 --> 00:27:27,320
Speaker 2: an assist there with them. So there's not just one midwife, right,

447
00:27:27,359 --> 00:27:30,040
Speaker 2: there's a team, and most cases you want to see

448
00:27:30,040 --> 00:27:32,760
Speaker 2: two midwives that are there to support you because they

449
00:27:32,760 --> 00:27:35,440
Speaker 2: are backing up one another and supporting one another as well.

450
00:27:35,520 --> 00:27:39,480
Speaker 5: Yes, and in most cases there's there's well there will

451
00:27:39,480 --> 00:27:42,000
Speaker 5: be the two midwives, so there's the primary in the.

452
00:27:41,920 --> 00:27:45,119
Speaker 3: Backup of that seventy said the assist, and then you

453
00:27:45,240 --> 00:27:48,720
Speaker 3: got your doula, and then your doula has a backup.

454
00:27:49,760 --> 00:27:51,240
Speaker 3: So that's four.

455
00:27:51,119 --> 00:27:55,920
Speaker 8: Potentially four people in the room that have known you

456
00:27:56,200 --> 00:28:00,920
Speaker 8: for months before. Same people, the four same people and

457
00:28:00,960 --> 00:28:03,800
Speaker 8: not just you as a birthing person, but your.

458
00:28:03,640 --> 00:28:10,240
Speaker 5: Partner, maybe your mama, maybe your grandmama, maybe your papa.

459
00:28:10,840 --> 00:28:13,720
Speaker 3: Right. We've been at Birst with five six.

460
00:28:13,680 --> 00:28:19,080
Speaker 5: Families d right, because part of our work is we're

461
00:28:19,160 --> 00:28:23,159
Speaker 5: not just doing the pregnant person or the partner or

462
00:28:23,160 --> 00:28:27,760
Speaker 5: the husband, but we're also doing mom or dad or siblings.

463
00:28:28,080 --> 00:28:33,320
Speaker 3: We do everybody right because trust.

464
00:28:34,080 --> 00:28:36,080
Speaker 7: And safety.

465
00:28:36,800 --> 00:28:38,360
Speaker 2: Is a huge.

466
00:28:38,040 --> 00:28:42,440
Speaker 5: Part of a beautiful, wonderful birth experience.

467
00:28:43,400 --> 00:28:43,600
Speaker 2: Right.

468
00:28:44,800 --> 00:28:51,640
Speaker 5: Trust and health and safety is so core to a

469
00:28:51,720 --> 00:28:53,640
Speaker 5: healthy birth and experience.

470
00:28:54,160 --> 00:28:54,440
Speaker 2: Right.

471
00:28:54,920 --> 00:28:58,880
Speaker 5: So again, breaking some of the misconceptions is going back

472
00:28:58,880 --> 00:29:01,400
Speaker 5: and understanding our history.

473
00:29:02,520 --> 00:29:04,800
Speaker 3: Our history is strong.

474
00:29:05,400 --> 00:29:08,920
Speaker 5: We were the first in many ways in this in

475
00:29:08,960 --> 00:29:13,600
Speaker 5: this work of doulah or Whiffrey, and I think that's

476
00:29:13,320 --> 00:29:16,040
Speaker 5: that's a great start. That's a that's a great start.

477
00:29:16,240 --> 00:29:17,520
Speaker 5: Let's go back in the history.

478
00:29:18,040 --> 00:29:21,680
Speaker 2: Yeah, that was so beautifully stated, and it's so disheartening

479
00:29:21,720 --> 00:29:24,920
Speaker 2: to hear about the propaganda and you know, how we

480
00:29:25,000 --> 00:29:27,520
Speaker 2: got away from what was natural to us, and how

481
00:29:27,720 --> 00:29:29,800
Speaker 2: a lot of people, I'm sure we all talked to

482
00:29:29,840 --> 00:29:32,640
Speaker 2: other people that look like us, and they're very hesitant,

483
00:29:32,760 --> 00:29:36,280
Speaker 2: very skeptical, very apprehensive about a home birth or having

484
00:29:36,400 --> 00:29:39,560
Speaker 2: birth anywhere outside of a hospital. And so it's just

485
00:29:39,600 --> 00:29:41,920
Speaker 2: so interesting when you think about that's what our ancestors

486
00:29:41,960 --> 00:29:43,880
Speaker 2: used to do anyway, right, So when you think about

487
00:29:44,480 --> 00:29:48,120
Speaker 2: the services the yeah, really the service right that you

488
00:29:48,160 --> 00:29:50,680
Speaker 2: all provide with bear with Me, duo. What are some

489
00:29:50,760 --> 00:29:53,320
Speaker 2: of the things that folks can expect from you all

490
00:29:53,400 --> 00:29:55,040
Speaker 2: when they work with you? And I'd love to hear

491
00:29:55,040 --> 00:29:57,840
Speaker 2: more about the postpartum care in that offering.

492
00:29:57,480 --> 00:30:01,000
Speaker 5: As well, So I would say Swiss to quickly services

493
00:30:01,000 --> 00:30:04,320
Speaker 5: that families can count on with Bear with Me is again,

494
00:30:04,400 --> 00:30:07,720
Speaker 5: like I said, we are going to be a continuum

495
00:30:07,720 --> 00:30:11,920
Speaker 5: of care and a continuum of support. We suggest that

496
00:30:12,520 --> 00:30:15,080
Speaker 5: with Bear with Me, if you're in securing us as

497
00:30:15,160 --> 00:30:17,600
Speaker 5: your do lists that you do so you know late

498
00:30:17,800 --> 00:30:21,440
Speaker 5: and maybe late in your second trimester, definitely by your

499
00:30:21,440 --> 00:30:23,200
Speaker 5: third go ahead and have.

500
00:30:23,280 --> 00:30:25,640
Speaker 3: Us secured and ready to go.

501
00:30:26,720 --> 00:30:33,240
Speaker 5: So services in the prenatally are those cbe educational opportunities.

502
00:30:33,560 --> 00:30:37,160
Speaker 5: We come to your home, you don't have to go

503
00:30:37,320 --> 00:30:40,280
Speaker 5: outside of the comfort of your home or is to

504
00:30:40,360 --> 00:30:43,720
Speaker 5: teach you about what's happening in your body, to teach

505
00:30:43,720 --> 00:30:48,600
Speaker 5: you comfort techniques, to teach you how your partner it

506
00:30:48,680 --> 00:30:52,640
Speaker 5: can support you and be a part of this beautiful experience.

507
00:30:53,520 --> 00:30:56,320
Speaker 5: We definitely are a part of every day of your

508
00:30:56,360 --> 00:30:58,680
Speaker 5: labor and delivery. On the day of we call it

509
00:30:58,760 --> 00:31:03,040
Speaker 5: day of care. So that's twenty four hour phone support,

510
00:31:03,440 --> 00:31:06,520
Speaker 5: twenty four hour texting and emailing if that's who what

511
00:31:06,680 --> 00:31:07,120
Speaker 5: you prefer.

512
00:31:07,680 --> 00:31:11,160
Speaker 3: We're twenty four hours hands on voice.

513
00:31:10,920 --> 00:31:15,200
Speaker 5: On when you're going into labor, and we're definitely there

514
00:31:15,240 --> 00:31:19,880
Speaker 5: for the day that your little one comes in the world, coaching, motivating,

515
00:31:20,240 --> 00:31:23,480
Speaker 5: reminding you that you got this, your body is made

516
00:31:23,560 --> 00:31:23,960
Speaker 5: for it.

517
00:31:24,360 --> 00:31:25,440
Speaker 3: You know it's all good.

518
00:31:26,040 --> 00:31:29,600
Speaker 5: And then with your partner, we're like whispringing into your

519
00:31:29,640 --> 00:31:32,760
Speaker 5: partner's ear. Remember we talked at you that part. Remember

520
00:31:32,800 --> 00:31:35,040
Speaker 5: we said, this is what's going to happen. So that

521
00:31:35,080 --> 00:31:37,240
Speaker 5: they can go over and they can be the champion

522
00:31:37,280 --> 00:31:40,280
Speaker 5: and the hero with you, right, and that they can

523
00:31:40,360 --> 00:31:43,200
Speaker 5: too be involved in the birth of that of their

524
00:31:43,200 --> 00:31:48,000
Speaker 5: little one. What do I say about postpartum as well

525
00:31:48,120 --> 00:31:51,560
Speaker 5: as the labor and births. We are always excited and

526
00:31:51,600 --> 00:31:55,000
Speaker 5: happy to be a part of that experience. Very honestly,

527
00:31:55,200 --> 00:31:58,920
Speaker 5: if a family said, look, deandroum, we are only able

528
00:31:58,960 --> 00:32:03,240
Speaker 5: to do either pre namely or postpartum, doulas support, which

529
00:32:03,240 --> 00:32:06,760
Speaker 5: one should we do? I'm gonna point them to the postpartum.

530
00:32:07,080 --> 00:32:08,680
Speaker 5: I'm gonna point them to the postpartum.

531
00:32:09,160 --> 00:32:09,360
Speaker 1: Right.

532
00:32:09,560 --> 00:32:13,080
Speaker 3: Sarrh came in and said, yes, I.

533
00:32:13,120 --> 00:32:16,680
Speaker 5: Want to point them to the postpartum because the postpartum pieces.

534
00:32:16,960 --> 00:32:19,560
Speaker 5: It's usually where this is when your baby is here

535
00:32:20,120 --> 00:32:23,160
Speaker 5: and you have that excitement and adrenaline on the on

536
00:32:23,600 --> 00:32:26,200
Speaker 5: the moment of the birth, and then a few hours

537
00:32:26,280 --> 00:32:27,720
Speaker 5: later you go, oh.

538
00:32:27,520 --> 00:32:30,960
Speaker 3: My goodness, they're gonna let us keep this little life.

539
00:32:31,320 --> 00:32:32,080
Speaker 3: What do we do?

540
00:32:32,720 --> 00:32:35,560
Speaker 5: That's part of a doulast's work is to help teach

541
00:32:35,680 --> 00:32:40,800
Speaker 5: and calm and explain and show quickly after that you're exhausted.

542
00:32:41,720 --> 00:32:44,080
Speaker 3: You're exhausting, You go, so, my goodness, we just need.

543
00:32:43,960 --> 00:32:46,360
Speaker 5: To sleep a little bit. So that's part of a

544
00:32:46,440 --> 00:32:49,400
Speaker 5: doula's work. Our work is to come in. We do

545
00:32:49,520 --> 00:32:53,160
Speaker 5: day visits and come in the daytime and do teaching

546
00:32:53,240 --> 00:32:53,840
Speaker 5: and showing.

547
00:32:54,360 --> 00:32:58,080
Speaker 3: We do overnight visits. Overnight visits are my.

548
00:32:58,200 --> 00:33:02,640
Speaker 5: Personal favorite because I get to hang out right your soon.

549
00:33:03,440 --> 00:33:05,560
Speaker 5: We get to hang out with that little baby all

550
00:33:05,680 --> 00:33:08,360
Speaker 5: night and let mama and Papa get.

551
00:33:08,200 --> 00:33:13,000
Speaker 3: As much sleep and rest as possible. We'll cook, we'll clean.

552
00:33:13,280 --> 00:33:14,640
Speaker 3: I get to wash.

553
00:33:14,920 --> 00:33:16,680
Speaker 5: Yeah, go to the cleaning now.

554
00:33:16,720 --> 00:33:18,520
Speaker 6: I get to clean it during the daytime. There's a

555
00:33:18,560 --> 00:33:20,560
Speaker 6: little too much conversation. I want you to wake up

556
00:33:20,560 --> 00:33:23,280
Speaker 6: in your space is clean. Those things are folded, they're

557
00:33:23,320 --> 00:33:26,480
Speaker 6: put away. You just wash this loaded and rain like I.

558
00:33:26,400 --> 00:33:28,240
Speaker 2: Think it's really important for those little touches.

559
00:33:28,480 --> 00:33:30,360
Speaker 3: Oh that's it. Yeah, the reason why I love you.

560
00:33:30,920 --> 00:33:37,280
Speaker 3: Yeah yeah. Making coffee, I'm a little skeptical. I remember.

561
00:33:37,560 --> 00:33:40,800
Speaker 5: I remember that family we just postponing for with the

562
00:33:40,880 --> 00:33:43,160
Speaker 5: family sometimes I got and they had one of these

563
00:33:43,200 --> 00:33:47,480
Speaker 5: most expensive fancy cough and they literally said, if you

564
00:33:47,480 --> 00:33:49,760
Speaker 5: could make coffee in the morning and we wake up.

565
00:33:49,640 --> 00:33:51,360
Speaker 2: Oh my guys, you don't know how I wonder about it.

566
00:33:51,360 --> 00:33:52,600
Speaker 2: Has a different coffee set up.

567
00:33:52,600 --> 00:33:56,360
Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, I'm googling. I'm looking up this coffee machine.

568
00:33:56,600 --> 00:33:58,960
Speaker 9: I'm like, oh, it was a mess.

569
00:33:59,280 --> 00:34:02,880
Speaker 3: It was I think I use coffee machine.

570
00:34:03,200 --> 00:34:06,400
Speaker 5: But literally, I say that, and we give I'm saying

571
00:34:06,440 --> 00:34:11,239
Speaker 5: that because postpartum is hopefully I'm we're sharing in.

572
00:34:11,200 --> 00:34:13,600
Speaker 3: A date enough, righteous and righteous enough way.

573
00:34:13,719 --> 00:34:17,000
Speaker 5: But we truly believe that it is so important and

574
00:34:17,040 --> 00:34:20,320
Speaker 5: it's one of the most overlooked parts of a doula's

575
00:34:20,360 --> 00:34:25,839
Speaker 5: work is postpartum care. You can't sell that much for postpartum.

576
00:34:25,840 --> 00:34:28,000
Speaker 5: You know, people, you know, you go to the stores

577
00:34:28,000 --> 00:34:31,000
Speaker 5: and they have all the pregnancy stuff on Michelle, but

578
00:34:31,040 --> 00:34:33,640
Speaker 5: there's not a it's not a nice little box that

579
00:34:33,760 --> 00:34:36,399
Speaker 5: says postpartum what you're doula sitting in the.

580
00:34:36,360 --> 00:34:38,640
Speaker 2: Box exactly, even though they need it.

581
00:34:39,200 --> 00:34:41,080
Speaker 4: Yeah, it sounds like they really do.

582
00:34:41,400 --> 00:34:42,120
Speaker 3: Goodness.

583
00:34:42,440 --> 00:34:46,280
Speaker 1: I think about like the statistics around how many women

584
00:34:46,760 --> 00:34:53,319
Speaker 1: or how many birthing persons experience postpartum depression, not just

585
00:34:53,600 --> 00:34:57,080
Speaker 1: not not just baby booze. The last statistic that I

586
00:34:57,120 --> 00:34:59,279
Speaker 1: saw was that it was like something around eighty five

587
00:34:59,320 --> 00:35:04,359
Speaker 1: percent of birthing people will experience baby blues, but to

588
00:35:04,440 --> 00:35:09,520
Speaker 1: the point where it's postpartum depression, it's still a large number.

589
00:35:10,719 --> 00:35:15,279
Speaker 1: And as I listen to you talk about the services

590
00:35:15,280 --> 00:35:18,719
Speaker 1: that you provide in that postpartum piece, and I think

591
00:35:18,760 --> 00:35:23,120
Speaker 1: about all of my friends who have and family who

592
00:35:23,160 --> 00:35:26,840
Speaker 1: have given birth, and how many of them would have

593
00:35:26,960 --> 00:35:34,520
Speaker 1: benefited tremendously from having something like that. So for those

594
00:35:34,680 --> 00:35:39,759
Speaker 1: families that are looking for a duo, what are the

595
00:35:39,920 --> 00:35:44,000
Speaker 1: questions that when they're interviewing, what are the questions that

596
00:35:44,040 --> 00:35:46,840
Speaker 1: they should be asking, like, what are the qualities?

597
00:35:47,200 --> 00:35:49,440
Speaker 4: Because you all just sound like amazing.

598
00:35:49,840 --> 00:35:53,399
Speaker 1: I was sitting there like, I'm like, I don't want

599
00:35:53,440 --> 00:35:58,080
Speaker 1: to have children, but if I ever made that decision,

600
00:35:59,080 --> 00:36:04,879
Speaker 1: I'm this is exactly what I would need. And So

601
00:36:05,680 --> 00:36:10,640
Speaker 1: what are the things that folks should look for when

602
00:36:11,080 --> 00:36:13,439
Speaker 1: they are trying to find the doula that is right

603
00:36:13,480 --> 00:36:16,120
Speaker 1: for them?

604
00:36:17,200 --> 00:36:19,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think for sure the first thing you.

605
00:36:19,760 --> 00:36:22,920
Speaker 6: Want to look for is more of a feeling. What

606
00:36:23,120 --> 00:36:28,440
Speaker 6: do you feel when your doula is talking to you

607
00:36:28,760 --> 00:36:31,320
Speaker 6: about their experience? What are you hearing?

608
00:36:31,600 --> 00:36:31,719
Speaker 10: Like?

609
00:36:31,800 --> 00:36:34,759
Speaker 6: What are you feeling inside of you? And I think

610
00:36:34,840 --> 00:36:37,600
Speaker 6: now one of the beautiful things is that there's so

611
00:36:37,680 --> 00:36:39,840
Speaker 6: much technology that you can get on you can actually

612
00:36:40,120 --> 00:36:43,279
Speaker 6: see them face to face, right and so that helps you.

613
00:36:44,080 --> 00:36:45,799
Speaker 6: But the first thing that came to mind for me

614
00:36:45,920 --> 00:36:49,160
Speaker 6: is like, what what energy do you feel? Because I

615
00:36:49,200 --> 00:36:51,880
Speaker 6: think we know our bodies feel a lot more and

616
00:36:51,920 --> 00:36:57,360
Speaker 6: they feel it faster than what our minds are actually hearing.

617
00:36:57,800 --> 00:36:59,160
Speaker 2: So that was the first thing that came I had

618
00:36:59,160 --> 00:36:59,719
Speaker 2: a couple.

619
00:37:00,480 --> 00:37:04,160
Speaker 5: No, no, I would say, open to your birthing wishes,

620
00:37:04,680 --> 00:37:09,359
Speaker 5: you know, really really for bear with me. We'll go

621
00:37:09,400 --> 00:37:11,400
Speaker 5: in and sit down and we'll speak with the family

622
00:37:11,440 --> 00:37:14,279
Speaker 5: as they're considering whether or not we're the right do

623
00:37:14,440 --> 00:37:17,799
Speaker 5: list for them, and we'll say often, you know, what

624
00:37:17,880 --> 00:37:19,960
Speaker 5: we were taught is not our baby, it's not our body,

625
00:37:19,960 --> 00:37:22,719
Speaker 5: it's not our birth. So if you say, look, you

626
00:37:22,760 --> 00:37:26,080
Speaker 5: know to us, hey, bear with me, de under Stephanie.

627
00:37:26,160 --> 00:37:28,720
Speaker 5: You know, as soon as I walk into my medical

628
00:37:28,840 --> 00:37:33,759
Speaker 5: under space and later I'm taking an epidural, fantastic or

629
00:37:33,760 --> 00:37:35,879
Speaker 5: if you go for it, we're going to support.

630
00:37:35,600 --> 00:37:36,120
Speaker 3: You on that.

631
00:37:36,520 --> 00:37:40,160
Speaker 5: You know, let's talk about why that's important to you, right,

632
00:37:40,520 --> 00:37:45,160
Speaker 5: how can we most help you feel empowered by that decision.

633
00:37:45,600 --> 00:37:48,640
Speaker 5: If we walk in and again you're thinking about working

634
00:37:48,680 --> 00:37:51,200
Speaker 5: with and you say we're going to have a home birth,

635
00:37:52,160 --> 00:37:55,760
Speaker 5: fantastic and we're going to go unmedicated.

636
00:37:56,320 --> 00:37:57,120
Speaker 3: Let's do this.

637
00:37:57,960 --> 00:38:00,600
Speaker 5: Our work is to support you, it's under and why

638
00:38:00,640 --> 00:38:04,279
Speaker 5: that's important to you and help prepare you for that experience.

639
00:38:04,680 --> 00:38:06,600
Speaker 5: So I would say open to your birthing.

640
00:38:06,320 --> 00:38:09,160
Speaker 6: Wishes, yeah, And I would say your question should definitely

641
00:38:09,480 --> 00:38:11,480
Speaker 6: center around what your birthing wishes are.

642
00:38:12,000 --> 00:38:15,279
Speaker 2: What if you're someone who, for example, yeah, you do

643
00:38:15,400 --> 00:38:18,319
Speaker 2: want it at the journal when you walk right in,

644
00:38:18,760 --> 00:38:21,080
Speaker 2: I feel like a question you want to ask is, well,

645
00:38:21,080 --> 00:38:25,080
Speaker 2: what's your experience working with families who may who have

646
00:38:25,120 --> 00:38:26,200
Speaker 2: made that type of request?

647
00:38:27,120 --> 00:38:30,200
Speaker 6: If there's a duel who's uncomfortable with that and that

648
00:38:30,719 --> 00:38:32,759
Speaker 6: is not their type of duel support that they want

649
00:38:32,760 --> 00:38:35,960
Speaker 6: to offer. Ideally, you want to hear them say that,

650
00:38:36,160 --> 00:38:38,319
Speaker 6: or if you hear them struggling to answer it, then

651
00:38:38,320 --> 00:38:41,840
Speaker 6: they may not be your person because we can confidently say, okay,

652
00:38:42,000 --> 00:38:45,160
Speaker 6: you know we've had these experiences before. This is how

653
00:38:45,200 --> 00:38:48,439
Speaker 6: we have navigated that with our families. So you're really

654
00:38:48,480 --> 00:38:51,640
Speaker 6: listening to see how are they responding to what you're

655
00:38:51,680 --> 00:38:54,759
Speaker 6: conveying as not even a wish of yours, but a

656
00:38:54,800 --> 00:38:58,680
Speaker 6: requirement to be supported. This is what I'm requiring of you,

657
00:38:59,280 --> 00:39:01,640
Speaker 6: And you want to hear for how they're responding to that.

658
00:39:01,680 --> 00:39:04,759
Speaker 6: I think that's the biggest thing, not holding back what

659
00:39:04,880 --> 00:39:08,480
Speaker 6: you want within your experience, saying what you want, not

660
00:39:08,640 --> 00:39:10,160
Speaker 6: what you think your doo wants to hear.

661
00:39:10,640 --> 00:39:14,759
Speaker 2: I think sometimes people think most duelers want me to

662
00:39:14,840 --> 00:39:19,040
Speaker 2: have like this unmedicated experience, and so they're telling the

663
00:39:19,120 --> 00:39:22,160
Speaker 2: duel what they think we want to hear. No, I

664
00:39:22,200 --> 00:39:24,800
Speaker 2: want to hear what you want to tell me.

665
00:39:24,840 --> 00:39:27,319
Speaker 6: How I'm supposed to support you and we will over

666
00:39:27,840 --> 00:39:28,680
Speaker 6: any surprises.

667
00:39:29,680 --> 00:39:31,880
Speaker 5: And I think for me, the last thing I'll say

668
00:39:32,000 --> 00:39:36,080
Speaker 5: here is that being supportive of your spiritual, religious, and

669
00:39:36,120 --> 00:39:43,480
Speaker 5: cultural beliefs night and again, that is extremely important. We've

670
00:39:43,480 --> 00:39:48,080
Speaker 5: worked with families who you know, have been extremely spiritual,

671
00:39:48,280 --> 00:39:52,520
Speaker 5: extremely religious, because that's what grounds them, that's what makes

672
00:39:52,520 --> 00:39:56,279
Speaker 5: them feel safe, that what makes them feel cared for,

673
00:39:57,000 --> 00:40:00,239
Speaker 5: and that we have to be able to connect to

674
00:40:00,320 --> 00:40:04,920
Speaker 5: that because if not, and that's extremely important to them,

675
00:40:06,239 --> 00:40:09,080
Speaker 5: they would feel it and we wouldn't be our best

676
00:40:09,120 --> 00:40:12,520
Speaker 5: selves in supporting. So I really think that's supportive of

677
00:40:12,600 --> 00:40:17,400
Speaker 5: the spiritual, religious, and other cultural beliefs is really important,

678
00:40:17,600 --> 00:40:19,560
Speaker 5: and so family should just put it out there.

679
00:40:20,120 --> 00:40:22,880
Speaker 3: Just put it out there. It's up to the doulas.

680
00:40:22,560 --> 00:40:26,240
Speaker 5: Say, oh, maybe that's maybe we're not a good match

681
00:40:26,280 --> 00:40:26,879
Speaker 5: for each other.

682
00:40:27,440 --> 00:40:28,880
Speaker 3: Right, we put it out there.

683
00:40:29,760 --> 00:40:32,600
Speaker 2: I'm so helpful, so beautiful. I do have a question,

684
00:40:32,680 --> 00:40:36,120
Speaker 2: but I have to add a few more amazing experiences

685
00:40:36,120 --> 00:40:37,920
Speaker 2: that I had with you all. I do want to

686
00:40:37,960 --> 00:40:42,320
Speaker 2: emphasize the radical honesty. I know that when giving birth,

687
00:40:42,440 --> 00:40:45,000
Speaker 2: letting your doula or your birth team know about things

688
00:40:45,000 --> 00:40:47,600
Speaker 2: that you may have trouble releasing. So for me, for instance,

689
00:40:47,600 --> 00:40:50,160
Speaker 2: I talked about on the podcast, you know, being a

690
00:40:50,239 --> 00:40:52,759
Speaker 2: strange for my mother during you know, the time that

691
00:40:52,800 --> 00:40:54,839
Speaker 2: I gave birth. Letting my doula know that was so

692
00:40:54,880 --> 00:40:56,960
Speaker 2: important because we were able to process a lot of

693
00:40:56,960 --> 00:40:59,680
Speaker 2: that together so that I wasn't holding onto that thinking

694
00:40:59,719 --> 00:41:02,240
Speaker 2: about that when it was time to you know, release

695
00:41:02,320 --> 00:41:02,800
Speaker 2: the baby.

696
00:41:02,880 --> 00:41:03,080
Speaker 4: Right.

697
00:41:03,840 --> 00:41:06,520
Speaker 2: I really believed that I did not struggle with postpartum

698
00:41:06,560 --> 00:41:09,320
Speaker 2: depression or baby booth because of my birth team and

699
00:41:09,400 --> 00:41:11,480
Speaker 2: the mental preparation that I did. And there were so

700
00:41:11,520 --> 00:41:15,440
Speaker 2: many different components, but the support was so crucial, and

701
00:41:15,480 --> 00:41:18,560
Speaker 2: I'm talking about they made sure that I bathed, like

702
00:41:18,640 --> 00:41:20,560
Speaker 2: I took a bath almost every day after even birth

703
00:41:20,640 --> 00:41:22,640
Speaker 2: my little sister Fad. They made sure that I did

704
00:41:22,680 --> 00:41:25,600
Speaker 2: and kept the baby. I remember Deandro massage and my

705
00:41:25,680 --> 00:41:31,360
Speaker 2: feet and my legs when I got the shower and yess,

706
00:41:31,440 --> 00:41:34,200
Speaker 2: I was like yes, Also supporting my husband to make

707
00:41:34,239 --> 00:41:36,360
Speaker 2: sure that he felt important because a lot of times

708
00:41:36,360 --> 00:41:39,280
Speaker 2: people just focus on the birth in person. So letting

709
00:41:39,560 --> 00:41:41,879
Speaker 2: you know the partner know like you're valuable here there's

710
00:41:41,920 --> 00:41:44,120
Speaker 2: a role for you as well, and then keeping the

711
00:41:44,120 --> 00:41:46,239
Speaker 2: baby throughout the night and making that food and like

712
00:41:46,520 --> 00:41:48,360
Speaker 2: coming upstairs like Okay, you need to eat this to

713
00:41:48,360 --> 00:41:50,360
Speaker 2: make sure your milk supply is good, and let me

714
00:41:50,440 --> 00:41:53,400
Speaker 2: support you with breastfeeding because that was challenging in the beginning.

715
00:41:53,840 --> 00:41:55,560
Speaker 2: And then I would say the last thing is the

716
00:41:55,600 --> 00:41:59,040
Speaker 2: closing ceremony. We had a beautiful clothing ceremony at the

717
00:41:59,160 --> 00:42:01,000
Speaker 2: end of the post part and care. So, lady, if

718
00:42:01,000 --> 00:42:04,160
Speaker 2: you're listening, if you had to choose between pre date

719
00:42:04,200 --> 00:42:07,400
Speaker 2: and postpartum care, I'm telling you that postpartum care the

720
00:42:07,520 --> 00:42:10,200
Speaker 2: right doula team is incredible and that.

721
00:42:10,200 --> 00:42:11,600
Speaker 3: Really sets you up for success.

722
00:42:11,760 --> 00:42:14,000
Speaker 2: So this leads into my question, and my question for

723
00:42:14,080 --> 00:42:17,200
Speaker 2: you ladies is is having a doula? Is this a

724
00:42:17,239 --> 00:42:19,880
Speaker 2: realistic option for someone that is on a tight budget.

725
00:42:20,320 --> 00:42:22,560
Speaker 2: And I'd love to hear your feedback about any resources

726
00:42:22,600 --> 00:42:24,759
Speaker 2: out there, because I know there might be you know,

727
00:42:24,800 --> 00:42:26,880
Speaker 2: women are birthing people that are listening and I'm like, well,

728
00:42:26,920 --> 00:42:28,480
Speaker 2: I want to get a doula, but we're on a

729
00:42:28,560 --> 00:42:31,640
Speaker 2: type budget. So what recommendations or resources do you all

730
00:42:31,719 --> 00:42:34,760
Speaker 2: have for folks that do want to plan to birth

731
00:42:34,840 --> 00:42:35,239
Speaker 2: this way?

732
00:42:36,320 --> 00:42:38,280
Speaker 6: You know, I'm going to use myself as an example.

733
00:42:38,480 --> 00:42:42,800
Speaker 6: When I was pregnant with my daughter, I had just graduated.

734
00:42:42,400 --> 00:42:46,800
Speaker 2: School and had no money, but I was able to

735
00:42:47,160 --> 00:42:51,799
Speaker 2: make everything happen. The reason why is because of what

736
00:42:51,960 --> 00:42:53,479
Speaker 2: you're asking us is.

737
00:42:54,920 --> 00:42:55,919
Speaker 3: You have to.

738
00:42:55,960 --> 00:42:59,920
Speaker 2: Take the time to do some research, research and lean.

739
00:42:59,840 --> 00:43:05,000
Speaker 6: On your community and find out where you can find someone,

740
00:43:05,320 --> 00:43:08,400
Speaker 6: meaning your doula if it's a midwife, team your midwife.

741
00:43:08,560 --> 00:43:12,480
Speaker 2: Finding out where those people are who can meet your needs.

742
00:43:13,080 --> 00:43:15,600
Speaker 2: Because a lot of the times it's just asking.

743
00:43:15,920 --> 00:43:21,640
Speaker 11: Yeah, it's just asking, and the ass can feel really

744
00:43:21,719 --> 00:43:25,520
Speaker 11: heavy because for all the reasons, for all the reasons,

745
00:43:25,880 --> 00:43:27,080
Speaker 11: but the ask can feel really heavy.

746
00:43:27,080 --> 00:43:29,720
Speaker 6: But I think that was the main thing is find

747
00:43:29,960 --> 00:43:34,400
Speaker 6: one dula, reach out to them and tell them what

748
00:43:34,560 --> 00:43:37,680
Speaker 6: your needs are. And if for some reason that person

749
00:43:37,840 --> 00:43:40,759
Speaker 6: is out of your budget, say is there anyone that

750
00:43:40,920 --> 00:43:45,440
Speaker 6: you know that could offer me a sliding scale or

751
00:43:45,480 --> 00:43:50,399
Speaker 6: a free service, And chances are just because it's community works,

752
00:43:50,400 --> 00:43:53,640
Speaker 6: as do as we know somebody and we know somebody

753
00:43:53,680 --> 00:43:56,160
Speaker 6: did and we're going to send.

754
00:43:56,000 --> 00:43:59,080
Speaker 2: You their way. That's just how we don't want you

755
00:43:59,120 --> 00:43:59,959
Speaker 2: to do without a doula.

756
00:44:00,080 --> 00:44:02,520
Speaker 6: So we're always thinking if we don't know somebody, you're

757
00:44:02,520 --> 00:44:04,680
Speaker 6: probably gonna look up somebody for you.

758
00:44:06,040 --> 00:44:06,279
Speaker 9: Sorry.

759
00:44:06,480 --> 00:44:09,439
Speaker 6: My first thing is just thinking about myself and where

760
00:44:09,440 --> 00:44:11,960
Speaker 6: I was act just saying what your needs are.

761
00:44:12,040 --> 00:44:17,840
Speaker 3: And asking one hundred percent, one hundred percent, yes you

762
00:44:18,440 --> 00:44:19,440
Speaker 3: got a free do it too.

763
00:44:19,440 --> 00:44:20,120
Speaker 4: I got a free.

764
00:44:22,200 --> 00:44:29,520
Speaker 9: Right right now, but in the direction show you okay.

765
00:44:30,760 --> 00:44:36,160
Speaker 5: As I would add to the research element is is

766
00:44:36,960 --> 00:44:40,560
Speaker 5: really understand how much it costs for you to have

767
00:44:40,680 --> 00:44:43,879
Speaker 5: your baby in the hospital, Like, actually know what those

768
00:44:43,960 --> 00:44:48,880
Speaker 5: numbers are, right, and those numbers you know, can range anywhere,

769
00:44:49,000 --> 00:44:51,280
Speaker 5: and it depends upon what state you're living, of course,

770
00:44:51,320 --> 00:44:55,200
Speaker 5: but anywhere from five thousand to eleven thousand, fourteen thousand

771
00:44:55,360 --> 00:44:59,280
Speaker 5: dollars to give birth in the hospital, right. So often

772
00:44:59,480 --> 00:45:01,799
Speaker 5: with folks will say well, yeah, yeah, yeah, but I

773
00:45:01,840 --> 00:45:05,920
Speaker 5: have insurance and my insurance will cover X pieces.

774
00:45:06,400 --> 00:45:10,879
Speaker 9: But insurance, you actually are paying for your insurance, so

775
00:45:11,239 --> 00:45:17,239
Speaker 9: you're actually not getting birth like free or this extreme like.

776
00:45:17,560 --> 00:45:18,440
Speaker 3: No cost to you.

777
00:45:18,920 --> 00:45:22,160
Speaker 5: But I mentioned that about researching how much it actually

778
00:45:22,200 --> 00:45:25,759
Speaker 5: costs to give birth in the hospital, and then how

779
00:45:25,840 --> 00:45:28,200
Speaker 5: much does it cost to have you know, out of

780
00:45:28,239 --> 00:45:31,120
Speaker 5: hospital birth or home birth or even if you're going

781
00:45:31,160 --> 00:45:33,440
Speaker 5: to stay in the hospital. But then look at what

782
00:45:33,560 --> 00:45:36,560
Speaker 5: the cost of your doula is, and it really is

783
00:45:36,600 --> 00:45:39,239
Speaker 5: a fraction of what it costs to.

784
00:45:39,320 --> 00:45:41,440
Speaker 3: Not have to not have a dola.

785
00:45:41,920 --> 00:45:44,200
Speaker 5: And you match that up against what are all these

786
00:45:44,239 --> 00:45:47,759
Speaker 5: wonderful benefits that we talked about today on this podcast,

787
00:45:48,440 --> 00:45:51,600
Speaker 5: and how helpful is and it's really hard, I think

788
00:45:51,640 --> 00:45:55,600
Speaker 5: to put a price on our care that we give

789
00:45:55,680 --> 00:45:58,200
Speaker 5: us do list, so I think that's super important to say.

790
00:45:58,600 --> 00:46:02,000
Speaker 5: I will then also say this, and when I often

791
00:46:02,080 --> 00:46:04,759
Speaker 5: tell folks who do ask and say, hey, this is

792
00:46:04,760 --> 00:46:07,160
Speaker 5: a little bit, this is out our budget, I said, well,

793
00:46:07,239 --> 00:46:09,240
Speaker 5: let me ask you something. Have you had your baby

794
00:46:09,280 --> 00:46:12,040
Speaker 5: shower yet? And they go, well, no, you know, my

795
00:46:12,680 --> 00:46:15,880
Speaker 5: my mother in law's planning that. And I said, well,

796
00:46:16,360 --> 00:46:18,920
Speaker 5: how about instead, I said, because let me tell you

797
00:46:18,960 --> 00:46:23,399
Speaker 5: what ab newbleing baby needs is two things. And if

798
00:46:23,400 --> 00:46:28,320
Speaker 5: you're breastfeeding. It's the mama's breast, and it's the mama's

799
00:46:28,320 --> 00:46:31,960
Speaker 5: breast because we don't even need the other breasts because

800
00:46:31,960 --> 00:46:35,480
Speaker 5: we don't even babies don't even need diapers. You actually

801
00:46:35,560 --> 00:46:40,440
Speaker 5: do not need diapers. So I share that with families

802
00:46:40,440 --> 00:46:43,600
Speaker 5: and I say, so, we think, if you what are

803
00:46:43,600 --> 00:46:46,240
Speaker 5: the gifts you're going to get from that baby shower?

804
00:46:46,800 --> 00:46:50,040
Speaker 5: What if you ask folks to give to your to

805
00:46:50,040 --> 00:46:51,520
Speaker 5: help you pay for your doulah?

806
00:46:53,600 --> 00:46:56,400
Speaker 3: And the light bulb goes on that.

807
00:46:58,760 --> 00:47:00,880
Speaker 2: The lightbulb goes on community.

808
00:47:01,480 --> 00:47:05,120
Speaker 5: Right, I'm gonna tell the details, But for seventies birth

809
00:47:05,160 --> 00:47:08,239
Speaker 5: of Zouri, there was an experience she wanted to have

810
00:47:08,480 --> 00:47:11,560
Speaker 5: within her birth and her uncle came to her and.

811
00:47:11,560 --> 00:47:13,560
Speaker 9: Said, well, what what what gift would you like for me?

812
00:47:14,040 --> 00:47:16,600
Speaker 5: And she said, she told them, and that was your

813
00:47:16,680 --> 00:47:19,360
Speaker 5: encapsulation where you're in placenta encapsulation.

814
00:47:20,200 --> 00:47:22,759
Speaker 3: So that was his gift to her. He didn't know

815
00:47:22,800 --> 00:47:23,920
Speaker 3: what it was at first.

816
00:47:25,280 --> 00:47:28,200
Speaker 5: I mean, she right, she had to break it down,

817
00:47:28,280 --> 00:47:30,040
Speaker 5: what was happening with the placenta?

818
00:47:30,560 --> 00:47:31,520
Speaker 3: What it is about?

819
00:47:31,719 --> 00:47:36,480
Speaker 2: A beautiful moment, you know, educa beautiful beautiful ladies? Really quick,

820
00:47:36,560 --> 00:47:38,920
Speaker 2: can you talk about why babies don't need diapers. For

821
00:47:38,960 --> 00:47:40,640
Speaker 2: folks that are like, wait what she lost me there?

822
00:47:40,680 --> 00:47:44,200
Speaker 2: And then all encapsulation, Yeah, yes.

823
00:47:44,000 --> 00:47:45,640
Speaker 3: You know you all have to keep you know, we'll

824
00:47:45,640 --> 00:47:47,680
Speaker 3: do this all day every day about birthday. You have

825
00:47:47,760 --> 00:47:50,640
Speaker 3: to bring do what you are doing beautifully, which is

826
00:47:50,680 --> 00:47:52,040
Speaker 3: bring us, bring us around.

827
00:47:52,440 --> 00:47:55,240
Speaker 5: So the reason why I said babies don't need diapers,

828
00:47:55,280 --> 00:47:58,000
Speaker 5: and again go back to say babies need two things

829
00:47:58,920 --> 00:47:59,960
Speaker 5: breast and breast.

830
00:48:00,200 --> 00:48:01,640
Speaker 3: They do need if you're breastfeeding.

831
00:48:01,680 --> 00:48:04,319
Speaker 5: If you're bottle feeding, then they need the bottle with

832
00:48:04,360 --> 00:48:05,560
Speaker 5: the with the formula in it.

833
00:48:06,120 --> 00:48:07,200
Speaker 3: So they need nourishment.

834
00:48:07,920 --> 00:48:10,040
Speaker 5: And the reason why I say you don't need diapers

835
00:48:10,520 --> 00:48:14,359
Speaker 5: is because diapers in the scheme of human life are

836
00:48:14,800 --> 00:48:17,839
Speaker 5: so new. They are I should probably I should look

837
00:48:17,840 --> 00:48:22,280
Speaker 5: this up when with year where diapers discovered, right, are formed?

838
00:48:22,280 --> 00:48:25,040
Speaker 5: And when I say diapers, I mean disposable.

839
00:48:24,400 --> 00:48:27,719
Speaker 3: Dipers, right. But but anyway, babies don't need them.

840
00:48:27,840 --> 00:48:30,239
Speaker 5: You can you can wrap a baby up in a

841
00:48:30,280 --> 00:48:32,840
Speaker 5: blanket and let it and baby do their business and

842
00:48:33,000 --> 00:48:35,160
Speaker 5: take the blanket and put in the water in the

843
00:48:35,360 --> 00:48:38,399
Speaker 5: wash to get ready to wash it. It's baby, it's

844
00:48:38,480 --> 00:48:42,759
Speaker 5: baby pea and baby poop. It's really nothing very it's

845
00:48:42,920 --> 00:48:46,359
Speaker 5: very fresh, it's very healthy. Right, So babies don't that's

846
00:48:46,360 --> 00:48:49,799
Speaker 5: what I mean by babies don't need diapers. We can

847
00:48:49,800 --> 00:48:53,279
Speaker 5: care for babies in a different way. But if you like, no, no, no,

848
00:48:53,480 --> 00:48:55,600
Speaker 5: de under, I'm my baby going on some diapers. Then

849
00:48:55,840 --> 00:49:00,120
Speaker 5: get a doula and some diapers and have two breasts

850
00:49:00,239 --> 00:49:00,680
Speaker 5: or bottle.

851
00:49:01,360 --> 00:49:03,360
Speaker 3: So that and that's all you need. That's it.

852
00:49:03,440 --> 00:49:06,600
Speaker 2: And there's definitely the placenta encapsulation just in case folks

853
00:49:06,640 --> 00:49:07,400
Speaker 2: are not familiar.

854
00:49:07,880 --> 00:49:11,920
Speaker 6: Yes, so I had my placenta encapsulated. And what that

855
00:49:11,960 --> 00:49:15,160
Speaker 6: means is after I birthed my baby, I birthed my

856
00:49:15,239 --> 00:49:20,840
Speaker 6: placenta and immediately my placenta was put on ice in

857
00:49:20,920 --> 00:49:25,360
Speaker 6: a little ice fox and a dula friend who also

858
00:49:25,480 --> 00:49:27,000
Speaker 6: encapsulates placentas came.

859
00:49:28,040 --> 00:49:32,240
Speaker 2: She picked it up, she took it home. She dehydrated

860
00:49:32,320 --> 00:49:36,359
Speaker 2: my placenta and broke it down and put it into

861
00:49:36,440 --> 00:49:40,400
Speaker 2: capsule form so I could just take it as pills. Essentially,

862
00:49:40,719 --> 00:49:42,640
Speaker 2: some people eat it, some people blend it up.

863
00:49:42,800 --> 00:49:44,840
Speaker 6: I think the most important part is preserving it, so

864
00:49:44,880 --> 00:49:47,680
Speaker 6: that preservation process is very important right after your birth it.

865
00:49:48,400 --> 00:49:49,880
Speaker 3: But yeah, I put.

866
00:49:49,760 --> 00:49:53,880
Speaker 6: Mine into pills and had them encapsulated and it was

867
00:49:53,920 --> 00:49:56,239
Speaker 6: the best decision that I ever made, And I was

868
00:49:56,280 --> 00:49:59,160
Speaker 6: so grateful for my uncle just asking me what I needed,

869
00:50:00,280 --> 00:50:03,879
Speaker 6: having the foresight and the support to say that that's

870
00:50:03,880 --> 00:50:07,520
Speaker 6: what I wanted. I feel like for me personally, it

871
00:50:07,800 --> 00:50:11,799
Speaker 6: definitely helped me navigate postpartum. And Tarry's back to what

872
00:50:11,840 --> 00:50:14,440
Speaker 6: you were saying, like, it's really important to also have

873
00:50:14,520 --> 00:50:18,400
Speaker 6: a good team around you, because I believe coupling having

874
00:50:18,520 --> 00:50:22,600
Speaker 6: my dualatine and my midwad F routine with my encapsulated

875
00:50:22,640 --> 00:50:26,719
Speaker 6: placentsa really made for like the perfect combination for postpartum.

876
00:50:27,200 --> 00:50:30,359
Speaker 3: The first nights for a little rough, you know.

877
00:50:30,440 --> 00:50:33,879
Speaker 6: With learning how to latch and to nurse, that can

878
00:50:33,920 --> 00:50:38,160
Speaker 6: be challenging, But after getting through that, I was healthy.

879
00:50:38,360 --> 00:50:43,440
Speaker 3: Can I say a little bit why pacent encapsulation? Can

880
00:50:43,480 --> 00:50:43,840
Speaker 3: I share a.

881
00:50:43,800 --> 00:50:46,279
Speaker 2: Little bit, so please do so.

882
00:50:46,880 --> 00:50:48,640
Speaker 5: I will say that I'm going to circle back to

883
00:50:49,440 --> 00:50:52,960
Speaker 5: the limited amount of research that's done on women and

884
00:50:53,000 --> 00:50:58,480
Speaker 5: specifically birth right. So in the evidence based information, the

885
00:50:58,520 --> 00:51:03,680
Speaker 5: research around placent effectiveness of ingesting placenta in your placenta,

886
00:51:04,040 --> 00:51:07,200
Speaker 5: there hasn't been big, huge studies done, right, So if

887
00:51:07,239 --> 00:51:10,640
Speaker 5: you look at the evidence space you will find that

888
00:51:10,680 --> 00:51:13,200
Speaker 5: the information kind of goes up and down. Some folks

889
00:51:13,239 --> 00:51:16,600
Speaker 5: are saying it's amazing, it's the best experience they ever

890
00:51:16,640 --> 00:51:19,879
Speaker 5: had because and others saying, eh, I couldn't really tell

891
00:51:19,960 --> 00:51:24,440
Speaker 5: that in ingesting my placenta made a difference. For Stephanie,

892
00:51:24,520 --> 00:51:26,960
Speaker 5: it made a difference. She can point to it, she

893
00:51:27,000 --> 00:51:30,399
Speaker 5: can share it, and it's clear. The placenta is the

894
00:51:30,640 --> 00:51:36,920
Speaker 5: only organ in the body that is grown for one

895
00:51:37,239 --> 00:51:40,840
Speaker 5: purpose and one purpose only. So no one is walking

896
00:51:40,880 --> 00:51:43,439
Speaker 5: around with the placenta in their body and to their

897
00:51:43,480 --> 00:51:50,319
Speaker 5: pregnant fascinating, right, blows your mind and so amazing that

898
00:51:50,400 --> 00:51:55,120
Speaker 5: once your baby is born, the placenta goes all right, body,

899
00:51:55,239 --> 00:51:57,839
Speaker 5: this was cool hanging out with you, but I got

900
00:51:57,920 --> 00:52:01,160
Speaker 5: to go because my little baby's going on, so now

901
00:52:01,200 --> 00:52:04,520
Speaker 5: I'm going to go too. It detaches and it access

902
00:52:04,560 --> 00:52:08,920
Speaker 5: your body. But the placenta, if you haven't those listening

903
00:52:09,000 --> 00:52:12,960
Speaker 5: haven't seen one, Google and look at one you know online,

904
00:52:13,160 --> 00:52:15,320
Speaker 5: it's nothing like looking like one, looking at one in

905
00:52:16,040 --> 00:52:20,680
Speaker 5: the flesh, but it is. It is the life organ.

906
00:52:20,840 --> 00:52:25,520
Speaker 5: Is the organ that allows your baby to be nourished

907
00:52:26,040 --> 00:52:30,600
Speaker 5: and live. That is the placenta. So when we're talking

908
00:52:30,719 --> 00:52:34,520
Speaker 5: and seveny is sharing about ingesting it. What we know

909
00:52:34,680 --> 00:52:40,080
Speaker 5: is all that amazing nutrition is in that placenta.

910
00:52:41,640 --> 00:52:43,320
Speaker 2: So so I want to eat it.

911
00:52:44,520 --> 00:52:46,080
Speaker 3: You want to eat it, You want to digest it.

912
00:52:46,200 --> 00:52:49,680
Speaker 5: Right, the hormones that are have kept you, you know

913
00:52:49,719 --> 00:52:52,799
Speaker 5: that are have that have you've grown or elevated in

914
00:52:52,840 --> 00:52:56,760
Speaker 5: your body, are all kind of hanging out stealing that placenta.

915
00:52:56,920 --> 00:52:57,080
Speaker 3: Right.

916
00:52:57,800 --> 00:53:02,000
Speaker 5: Not only is ingesting it important for some birthing folks,

917
00:53:02,200 --> 00:53:07,319
Speaker 5: but also the placenta in some cultures is revered as

918
00:53:07,400 --> 00:53:13,400
Speaker 5: the most sacred organ, the most sacred organ.

919
00:53:13,880 --> 00:53:16,920
Speaker 3: So in some cultures, the placenta is.

920
00:53:16,840 --> 00:53:20,960
Speaker 5: Actually there's a celebration that happens specifically around the placenta

921
00:53:21,560 --> 00:53:26,040
Speaker 5: for saying thank you for giving this baby life. Some cultures,

922
00:53:26,160 --> 00:53:30,080
Speaker 5: the placenta is buried and then a small tree is

923
00:53:30,120 --> 00:53:33,120
Speaker 5: planted on top of it as the reminder of the

924
00:53:33,160 --> 00:53:36,279
Speaker 5: continuum of life that that placenta gave the baby and

925
00:53:36,320 --> 00:53:37,640
Speaker 5: continues to give that tree.

926
00:53:38,800 --> 00:53:40,960
Speaker 3: Right, So, I know we've gone down.

927
00:53:40,800 --> 00:53:45,560
Speaker 5: The placenta the placenta hole pun intended.

928
00:53:45,440 --> 00:53:48,080
Speaker 3: But we've gone at moscent hole.

929
00:53:48,120 --> 00:53:51,839
Speaker 5: But it is a fascinating it is fascinating this this

930
00:53:51,880 --> 00:53:53,200
Speaker 5: is this do let's geeking.

931
00:53:52,920 --> 00:53:53,440
Speaker 3: Out right now.

932
00:53:55,080 --> 00:53:57,759
Speaker 4: I appreciate that because I know that there are so many.

933
00:53:57,520 --> 00:54:01,200
Speaker 1: Of us that needed this education, so that if it's

934
00:54:01,320 --> 00:54:04,840
Speaker 1: not for ourselves, it's for in the support of someone

935
00:54:04,920 --> 00:54:08,960
Speaker 1: we love. And so, you know, as I think about

936
00:54:09,120 --> 00:54:13,080
Speaker 1: all of the work that you all do, I have

937
00:54:13,200 --> 00:54:15,799
Speaker 1: one question that may feel kind of nosy, but I'm

938
00:54:15,800 --> 00:54:17,240
Speaker 1: going to ask it anyway.

939
00:54:17,200 --> 00:54:20,440
Speaker 3: You can ask it. You didn't ask anything, doctor Donald.

940
00:54:20,640 --> 00:54:21,840
Speaker 3: You're in our family now.

941
00:54:22,800 --> 00:54:23,399
Speaker 4: Thank you.

942
00:54:25,360 --> 00:54:29,480
Speaker 1: How do you all care for yourselves? Because I hear

943
00:54:30,239 --> 00:54:32,560
Speaker 1: all of the work that you all are doing to

944
00:54:32,719 --> 00:54:37,520
Speaker 1: care for others, and so what do you do to

945
00:54:37,640 --> 00:54:40,520
Speaker 1: fill your cup so that you can do this work?

946
00:54:41,000 --> 00:54:42,759
Speaker 3: Well, I've just learned how to care for myself, So

947
00:54:44,400 --> 00:54:45,040
Speaker 3: go for it.

948
00:54:45,200 --> 00:54:51,160
Speaker 6: This is very fresh, I think for me being mindful

949
00:54:51,239 --> 00:54:54,000
Speaker 6: of who I'm giving my energy to.

950
00:54:54,600 --> 00:54:57,680
Speaker 3: When you say yes, we want.

951
00:54:57,480 --> 00:55:00,120
Speaker 6: To work with you, I now know I've worked with

952
00:55:00,320 --> 00:55:03,839
Speaker 6: so many families. We've had a lot of great families.

953
00:55:04,960 --> 00:55:08,880
Speaker 6: But I've also learned who am I giving my energy to.

954
00:55:09,360 --> 00:55:12,239
Speaker 6: Let me let me ask myself that is this a

955
00:55:12,280 --> 00:55:14,360
Speaker 6: good fit? Is this a good match for me? And

956
00:55:14,400 --> 00:55:16,480
Speaker 6: I think doos need to ask ourselves that people are

957
00:55:16,480 --> 00:55:20,200
Speaker 6: eager to get out there and do the work right

958
00:55:20,239 --> 00:55:21,720
Speaker 6: because it's a part of our calling.

959
00:55:22,480 --> 00:55:24,200
Speaker 2: And I think we also need to really slow down.

960
00:55:24,520 --> 00:55:27,680
Speaker 2: Just like we're being interviewed, we also need to interview

961
00:55:27,719 --> 00:55:29,920
Speaker 2: the people who want to work with us. Is this

962
00:55:30,000 --> 00:55:33,600
Speaker 2: a good energetic match? Because this is something that is

963
00:55:33,640 --> 00:55:38,080
Speaker 2: going to take energy away from my body I have

964
00:55:38,160 --> 00:55:39,360
Speaker 2: to pour into this person.

965
00:55:40,960 --> 00:55:44,640
Speaker 6: So I think we have to practice asking ourselves is

966
00:55:44,680 --> 00:55:46,400
Speaker 6: this a good energetic match for me?

967
00:55:46,880 --> 00:55:52,160
Speaker 2: At the beginning? That is something that I've learned before

968
00:55:52,200 --> 00:55:55,920
Speaker 2: we say yes during I think for me.

969
00:55:56,200 --> 00:55:59,400
Speaker 6: Because I am a mom and I was a mom

970
00:55:59,520 --> 00:56:02,359
Speaker 6: and a duel at the same time, I should have.

971
00:56:02,320 --> 00:56:07,919
Speaker 2: Said no to a lot more things, and I mean

972
00:56:08,160 --> 00:56:13,040
Speaker 2: physically showing up for prenatals and labor and birth and postpartum.

973
00:56:13,080 --> 00:56:13,920
Speaker 3: I think I.

974
00:56:13,880 --> 00:56:16,560
Speaker 2: Should have taken a different approach, right and just like

975
00:56:17,120 --> 00:56:17,680
Speaker 2: can you do this?

976
00:56:19,880 --> 00:56:20,920
Speaker 3: My baby is.

977
00:56:20,880 --> 00:56:24,600
Speaker 2: Going through this, and or I'm tired.

978
00:56:26,080 --> 00:56:30,880
Speaker 6: I'm tired and I was I was and am just

979
00:56:31,000 --> 00:56:32,719
Speaker 6: so hungry to do the work.

980
00:56:32,760 --> 00:56:35,880
Speaker 2: I love my family. I had a hard time creating boundaries.

981
00:56:36,000 --> 00:56:38,920
Speaker 6: I had a really hard time creating boundaries, creating boundaries

982
00:56:39,360 --> 00:56:41,759
Speaker 6: when you're in it, and then really having a real

983
00:56:41,840 --> 00:56:47,280
Speaker 6: self care routine or after you have supported a family

984
00:56:47,680 --> 00:56:51,680
Speaker 6: right after the labor, but then also after postpartum, and

985
00:56:52,000 --> 00:56:54,840
Speaker 6: I think having a closing ceremony for yourself as a

986
00:56:54,920 --> 00:57:00,440
Speaker 6: doula is really important. And releasing what we had to

987
00:57:00,480 --> 00:57:03,080
Speaker 6: hold for that family, as beautiful.

988
00:57:02,640 --> 00:57:05,280
Speaker 2: As it was, I have to release it. But having

989
00:57:05,320 --> 00:57:10,520
Speaker 2: like a real for yourself, I think.

990
00:57:12,000 --> 00:57:15,880
Speaker 5: I one hundred percent agree to everything. I will say.

991
00:57:16,240 --> 00:57:21,320
Speaker 5: I'll share one of my self care rituals after attending

992
00:57:21,320 --> 00:57:25,920
Speaker 5: a birth and after finishing postparumly is I get in

993
00:57:26,000 --> 00:57:30,360
Speaker 5: the shower, I run the water, and I cry. I cry,

994
00:57:31,680 --> 00:57:37,640
Speaker 5: and my tears are tears of such gratitude because I

995
00:57:37,720 --> 00:57:42,120
Speaker 5: know when we're at a birth and we witness a

996
00:57:42,200 --> 00:57:46,400
Speaker 5: baby coming into this world. I know when we wrap

997
00:57:46,480 --> 00:57:52,680
Speaker 5: up postpartum care that that is a gift we are

998
00:57:52,720 --> 00:57:59,000
Speaker 5: as dolas, have the opportunity to witness. I believe the

999
00:57:59,040 --> 00:58:04,640
Speaker 5: greatest thing ever, which is the entry into this world

1000
00:58:04,640 --> 00:58:08,120
Speaker 5: of new life. And I believe very clearly, and I

1001
00:58:08,120 --> 00:58:12,520
Speaker 5: think I could say we staff is that. It's because

1002
00:58:12,560 --> 00:58:15,480
Speaker 5: every time I'm mad at birth and close up postpartum

1003
00:58:15,760 --> 00:58:20,120
Speaker 5: and have that closing ceremony, our aunt Hattie May is

1004
00:58:20,160 --> 00:58:24,400
Speaker 5: in the room with us our aunt Hattie May is

1005
00:58:24,440 --> 00:58:28,320
Speaker 5: that every postpartum. So when I'm in that shower crying,

1006
00:58:28,480 --> 00:58:31,120
Speaker 5: I am saying thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you,

1007
00:58:31,200 --> 00:58:35,520
Speaker 5: thank you, thank you for choosing bear with me, thank

1008
00:58:35,560 --> 00:58:39,160
Speaker 5: you for allowing me to witness. Thank you for gutting

1009
00:58:39,520 --> 00:58:42,160
Speaker 5: my voice, in my heart, in my hands.

1010
00:58:43,480 --> 00:58:43,680
Speaker 3: Right.

1011
00:58:43,920 --> 00:58:47,240
Speaker 5: So, I would say, that's the self care routine that

1012
00:58:47,360 --> 00:58:51,360
Speaker 5: I do. And then I think, last we I'll say

1013
00:58:51,480 --> 00:58:55,720
Speaker 5: about self care and is that we were doing five

1014
00:58:55,800 --> 00:58:59,560
Speaker 5: or six births a month when we first started. We

1015
00:59:00,800 --> 00:59:05,320
Speaker 5: pulled back and went decided to change our model to

1016
00:59:05,440 --> 00:59:10,360
Speaker 5: one in which we can work longer with families, build

1017
00:59:10,800 --> 00:59:17,120
Speaker 5: deeper relationships, more trust. And that does mean we take

1018
00:59:17,200 --> 00:59:21,560
Speaker 5: less families. That doesn't mean that we're doing less providing

1019
00:59:21,640 --> 00:59:26,040
Speaker 5: less care. It just means we go deeper with our

1020
00:59:26,120 --> 00:59:29,240
Speaker 5: families now and that has helped in the care and

1021
00:59:29,360 --> 00:59:31,480
Speaker 5: sustainability for us.

1022
00:59:32,040 --> 00:59:34,840
Speaker 2: That is so incredible. It's so sobering to hear that

1023
00:59:34,960 --> 00:59:37,440
Speaker 2: you all are pouring into yourself and Stephane, I appreciate

1024
00:59:37,440 --> 00:59:39,000
Speaker 2: the vulnerability and the transparency.

1025
00:59:39,040 --> 00:59:42,000
Speaker 3: Like girl, I just I just you know, started myself here.

1026
00:59:42,000 --> 00:59:44,000
Speaker 2: But I mean, we're all on this journey and I'm

1027
00:59:44,040 --> 00:59:46,080
Speaker 2: just so grateful to hear that you all are pouring

1028
00:59:46,080 --> 00:59:49,720
Speaker 2: into yourselves because you do so much for so many people,

1029
00:59:50,000 --> 00:59:52,840
Speaker 2: and like you said, that energy transfer is so real

1030
00:59:53,400 --> 00:59:55,600
Speaker 2: and so honestly, we just want to thank you so

1031
00:59:55,760 --> 00:59:59,560
Speaker 2: much for your time, your energy, your expertise, just everything

1032
00:59:59,560 --> 00:59:59,880
Speaker 2: that you do.

1033
01:00:00,320 --> 01:00:00,560
Speaker 3: Thank you.

1034
01:00:00,640 --> 01:00:06,120
Speaker 2: We are all family now as yeah, we all listed,

1035
01:00:06,280 --> 01:00:08,600
Speaker 2: and yeah, lady, as you listen, I hope that you

1036
01:00:08,680 --> 01:00:12,000
Speaker 2: decide to connect with Bear with Me Duo. You can

1037
01:00:12,000 --> 01:00:15,000
Speaker 2: find them on Instagram, but bear the Bear with Me

1038
01:00:15,200 --> 01:00:17,640
Speaker 2: Duo and we'll also add their links in the show

1039
01:00:17,680 --> 01:00:18,840
Speaker 2: notes so you can keep in touch.

1040
01:00:19,200 --> 01:00:19,520
Speaker 3: Ladies.

1041
01:00:19,560 --> 01:00:21,520
Speaker 2: Is there anything else that you want to share with

1042
01:00:21,640 --> 01:00:23,280
Speaker 2: the listeners that we have. Is there any way that

1043
01:00:23,280 --> 01:00:25,480
Speaker 2: they can support you and your work, or is there

1044
01:00:25,480 --> 01:00:28,000
Speaker 2: anywhere that you want them to connect with you online

1045
01:00:28,040 --> 01:00:30,640
Speaker 2: so they can learn more about you. Let us be

1046
01:00:30,800 --> 01:00:31,920
Speaker 2: that resource for you.

1047
01:00:32,640 --> 01:00:36,120
Speaker 6: If we are not in your city and we're not

1048
01:00:36,160 --> 01:00:39,200
Speaker 6: in your backyard, still let us view that resource.

1049
01:00:39,320 --> 01:00:40,600
Speaker 3: I think we put we put.

1050
01:00:40,520 --> 01:00:43,640
Speaker 6: Some love and laughter on Doula's being a part of

1051
01:00:43,640 --> 01:00:46,240
Speaker 6: the bigger community who want to provide.

1052
01:00:45,960 --> 01:00:48,800
Speaker 2: Resources, but very seriously.

1053
01:00:48,400 --> 01:00:50,680
Speaker 6: We needia and if it's sending us an email for

1054
01:00:50,800 --> 01:00:52,520
Speaker 6: sending us as mem and saying.

1055
01:00:52,280 --> 01:00:54,920
Speaker 2: Hey, like I don't I just don't know where to start.

1056
01:00:56,000 --> 01:00:58,840
Speaker 6: We have a network in the community of people that

1057
01:00:58,880 --> 01:01:01,760
Speaker 6: we are connected to, so definitely reaching out to us

1058
01:01:02,440 --> 01:01:04,640
Speaker 6: is very important. You can find all of our contact

1059
01:01:04,640 --> 01:01:08,280
Speaker 6: information online. But I would say, for sure, just let

1060
01:01:08,360 --> 01:01:10,720
Speaker 6: us be your resource. Let us be your starting point.

1061
01:01:12,000 --> 01:01:13,840
Speaker 3: Nothing else. Let us be your starting point.

1062
01:01:14,760 --> 01:01:20,160
Speaker 5: Dittle to everything that my amazing duo of partner just said,

1063
01:01:20,560 --> 01:01:26,120
Speaker 5: I would add, legislation is real, It's happening in this country.

1064
01:01:26,320 --> 01:01:32,200
Speaker 3: Birth justice is strong and large. Our voices are loud.

1065
01:01:33,080 --> 01:01:36,040
Speaker 5: So for as many of us, you know, we're doing

1066
01:01:36,040 --> 01:01:39,120
Speaker 5: the work and being in the places, the hospitals and

1067
01:01:39,120 --> 01:01:42,120
Speaker 5: the homes, the birth centers and helping and supporting with

1068
01:01:42,200 --> 01:01:45,680
Speaker 5: birth and postpartum. And they're also earth workers and do

1069
01:01:45,800 --> 01:01:47,840
Speaker 5: lists who are kicking down.

1070
01:01:47,640 --> 01:01:49,640
Speaker 3: The doors around birth justice.

1071
01:01:50,080 --> 01:01:54,439
Speaker 5: So often, I would say, for non burthing folks who

1072
01:01:54,480 --> 01:01:59,520
Speaker 5: don't have the internal tools to give birth, and you're saying, yeah,

1073
01:01:59,520 --> 01:02:02,600
Speaker 5: that's what you know, that's a birthing person's issue, it's

1074
01:02:02,640 --> 01:02:07,600
Speaker 5: absolutely not get involved kick down the doors with us.

1075
01:02:08,040 --> 01:02:11,400
Speaker 5: It is a movement, and it's not a movement that's

1076
01:02:11,440 --> 01:02:16,360
Speaker 5: going away anytime soon, and we are making big moves.

1077
01:02:16,800 --> 01:02:21,400
Speaker 5: Doulists typically do not are not seen, and aren't getting paid,

1078
01:02:22,000 --> 01:02:25,000
Speaker 5: in many cases a living wage to be a doula,

1079
01:02:25,640 --> 01:02:29,720
Speaker 5: and often we can't reimburse in medical or any of

1080
01:02:29,800 --> 01:02:32,000
Speaker 5: the other systems that are in place.

1081
01:02:32,640 --> 01:02:33,680
Speaker 3: So a lot of.

1082
01:02:33,640 --> 01:02:37,600
Speaker 5: That work is being is happening to make those things

1083
01:02:37,640 --> 01:02:41,080
Speaker 5: possible for doulos who want to partake in those systems.

1084
01:02:41,160 --> 01:02:43,880
Speaker 5: So that's what I would say, is you know, be

1085
01:02:43,960 --> 01:02:47,800
Speaker 5: a part of get your voice out there, continue to

1086
01:02:47,920 --> 01:02:49,720
Speaker 5: kick down the doors with us.

1087
01:02:49,800 --> 01:02:50,400
Speaker 3: We're doing it.

1088
01:02:50,800 --> 01:02:53,200
Speaker 2: That is so helpful. Thank you so much, ladies.

1089
01:02:53,640 --> 01:02:58,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, thank you. This was this is fun. I

1090
01:02:58,920 --> 01:03:00,920
Speaker 3: like what you said, love and laughter.

1091
01:03:01,520 --> 01:03:03,240
Speaker 2: Yeah, we had love and laughter on top.

1092
01:03:03,480 --> 01:03:06,520
Speaker 3: We have love and laughter spilled with love and laughter.

1093
01:03:06,600 --> 01:03:10,240
Speaker 3: So thank you all so much. We're appreciating. We're appreciated.

1094
01:03:11,840 --> 01:03:15,280
Speaker 10: Hey lady, it's Terry here from the Cultivating her Space podcast.

1095
01:03:15,640 --> 01:03:18,440
Speaker 10: I'm hosting a free podcasting masterclass where I'm going to

1096
01:03:18,520 --> 01:03:22,080
Speaker 10: teach you how to create your impactful podcast and how

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01:03:22,120 --> 01:03:25,200
Speaker 10: you can generate multiple streams of income. You can visit

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01:03:25,280 --> 01:03:29,120
Speaker 10: podcast with Terry dot com to register for free. I

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01:03:29,160 --> 01:03:30,000
Speaker 10: hope to see you there.

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01:03:30,200 --> 01:03:36,120
Speaker 1: Thanks for joining us today. Please note that our show

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01:03:36,200 --> 01:03:42,120
Speaker 1: may contain conversations about self help, advice, self empowerment, and

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01:03:42,240 --> 01:03:45,360
Speaker 1: mental health, but is by no means meant to be

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01:03:45,400 --> 01:03:49,680
Speaker 1: a substitute for an ongoing formal relationship with a trained

1104
01:03:49,720 --> 01:03:53,800
Speaker 1: mental health provider. If you are someone you know is

1105
01:03:53,800 --> 01:03:57,120
Speaker 1: in need of mental health care, please visit a Therapy

1106
01:03:57,160 --> 01:04:03,080
Speaker 1: for Black Girls directory Psychology today or contact your insurance provider.

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01:04:03,680 --> 01:04:05,480
Speaker 2: If you liked what you heard and want to keep

1108
01:04:05,520 --> 01:04:10,520
Speaker 2: the conversation going, visit our website at cultivatinghirspace dot com

1109
01:04:10,920 --> 01:04:13,160
Speaker 2: and be sure to click the Patreon tab to get

1110
01:04:13,240 --> 01:04:18,280
Speaker 2: access to video content, bonuses, and our weekly after show.

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01:04:19,160 --> 01:04:23,760
Speaker 2: And before we meet again, repeat after me, what's meant

1112
01:04:23,760 --> 01:04:25,760
Speaker 2: for me? Will never miss me?

1113
01:04:26,600 --> 01:04:27,680
Speaker 3: I don't have to chase