WEBVTT - Idina Menzel ON: How to Be Present without Self Judgment or Criticism & The Importance of Consistency to Achieve Your Goals 0:00:00.200 --> 0:00:03.160 My next guest is Adina Menzel. She has a new 0:00:03.240 --> 0:00:06.440 album called Drama Queen and a children's book called Proud 0:00:06.519 --> 0:00:09.920 Mouse out September twelfth. Make sure to watch and read. 0:00:10.320 --> 0:00:13.520 My son is Mixed. I don't want my whiteness to 0:00:13.600 --> 0:00:16.279 be something that I know people say you're the mom. 0:00:16.360 --> 0:00:18.119 He's going to love you, but there's going to be 0:00:18.200 --> 0:00:21.200 things that I can't understand for him because I'm not 0:00:21.400 --> 0:00:23.760 in his skin. And as he's getting older, he's becoming 0:00:23.800 --> 0:00:26.720 more and more aware of the society that he lives 0:00:26.760 --> 0:00:31.400 in and the violence, the racism, and I just want 0:00:31.440 --> 0:00:33.479 to be someone he can come to, you know. The 0:00:33.479 --> 0:00:35.120 best selling author in the post. 0:00:34.880 --> 0:00:36.839 The number one health and wellness. 0:00:36.520 --> 0:00:38.400 Podcast On Purpose with Jay Shetty. 0:00:40.240 --> 0:00:43.360 Hey everyone, welcome back to On Purpose. I am so 0:00:43.520 --> 0:00:46.160 grateful for our community here at the number one health 0:00:46.159 --> 0:00:48.720 podcast in the world. Thanks to each and every one 0:00:48.760 --> 0:00:51.080 of you that come back every week to listen, learn 0:00:51.240 --> 0:00:53.600 and grow. And I know that you're always looking for 0:00:53.680 --> 0:00:57.120 new stories, new ideas, new things to bring into your 0:00:57.160 --> 0:00:59.280 life so that you can feel better, feel happy. I 0:00:59.360 --> 0:01:02.560 feel healthier and feel healed. And today I'm talking to 0:01:02.600 --> 0:01:06.120 a guest who has a really unique experience of life. 0:01:06.120 --> 0:01:08.119 And that's what I love. I love learning about people 0:01:08.120 --> 0:01:11.280 who've come from different backgrounds, different walks of life, taken 0:01:11.319 --> 0:01:14.959 different parts. And I'm speaking to all of you about 0:01:15.000 --> 0:01:19.959 Idina Menzel, a powerhouse multi hyphenet, a singer, an actress 0:01:19.959 --> 0:01:23.720 in film and TV, a songwriter, a Broadway star, and 0:01:23.920 --> 0:01:28.800 a philanthropist. And I mean her accolades are absolutely unbelievable. 0:01:28.880 --> 0:01:31.760 Adina rose to fame for her role as Maureen in 0:01:31.800 --> 0:01:34.760 the popular Broadway musical Rent, and their career took off 0:01:34.840 --> 0:01:37.640 when she won a Tony Award for her role as Alphabet, 0:01:37.720 --> 0:01:40.520 the Wicked Witch of the West in the musical Wicked. 0:01:40.520 --> 0:01:43.360 If you haven't seen it, it's phenomenal. I can't believe 0:01:43.400 --> 0:01:45.560 you haven't seen it yet. Adina's voice can be heard 0:01:45.600 --> 0:01:49.160 as Elsa in Disney's Oscar winning Frozen, the second highest 0:01:49.160 --> 0:01:52.600 grossing animated film of all time, with more than one 0:01:52.640 --> 0:01:56.640 point two billion dollars in worldwide box office revenue, and 0:01:56.760 --> 0:01:59.960 right now she's out talking about her children's book Loud Mouse, 0:02:00.520 --> 0:02:02.840 which we'll be hearing about today as well. Please welcome 0:02:02.840 --> 0:02:05.440 to the show, Dinna Manzelle, and thank you for. 0:02:05.360 --> 0:02:06.640 Doing this, Thanks for having me. 0:02:06.760 --> 0:02:09.320 Yeah, it's so grateful to meet you and so happy 0:02:09.360 --> 0:02:10.920 to get to spend this time with you. I know 0:02:10.919 --> 0:02:12.799 you've had a long day. We're just talking about. You've 0:02:12.800 --> 0:02:14.040 been up since four am. 0:02:14.320 --> 0:02:16.680 Yeah, and I'm on the LA time. So that's what 0:02:16.960 --> 0:02:19.480 that was weird because I couldn't get to bed, yeah, 0:02:19.639 --> 0:02:22.480 with my jet lag, so I'm running on empty. But 0:02:22.560 --> 0:02:23.680 I'm happy to be here. 0:02:23.880 --> 0:02:26.000 I'm just coming as well three days ago, and so 0:02:26.120 --> 0:02:28.440 I know that feels like But I guess the question 0:02:28.560 --> 0:02:30.360 is that you've been up since four am, You've been 0:02:30.400 --> 0:02:33.680 doing so much work today. What drives you? What motivates you? 0:02:33.720 --> 0:02:34.800 What what keeps you going? 0:02:35.080 --> 0:02:40.880 My son, my thirteen year old son Walker, I think 0:02:40.880 --> 0:02:46.480 that's the main driving force. I mean, obviously creativity and 0:02:47.200 --> 0:02:53.160 my you know, artistic soul, my desire to keep creating 0:02:53.280 --> 0:02:58.359 and finding new ways to express myself. But if I'm 0:02:58.360 --> 0:03:01.440 being completely honest, it's you know, it's how can I 0:03:01.520 --> 0:03:05.840 be a better mom? How what am I doing today 0:03:05.960 --> 0:03:12.720 to help my son? You know? My relationship with my husband. 0:03:12.720 --> 0:03:16.200 I think it's because I'm I've turned fifty now, and 0:03:17.960 --> 0:03:21.560 the ambition starts to weigh a little bit when you 0:03:22.320 --> 0:03:24.800 when you have a little success too, you know, like 0:03:26.600 --> 0:03:29.520 start to feel okay, like I can afford to pay 0:03:29.639 --> 0:03:33.840 for his schooling, and I can pay my mortgage, and 0:03:35.960 --> 0:03:39.280 I'm doing wonderful things and working with terrific people, and 0:03:39.360 --> 0:03:42.040 so I can relax a little bit. When I was younger, 0:03:42.080 --> 0:03:44.480 I was just pounding the pavement so hard, you know, 0:03:44.600 --> 0:03:47.760 and really I believed in myself, but I was just 0:03:48.000 --> 0:03:52.640 really working hard and playing gigs everywhere and trying to 0:03:52.680 --> 0:03:56.120 get noticed. And so at this age it starts to 0:03:56.640 --> 0:04:00.200 you know, you go, Okay, everything's everything's going to be okay, 0:04:00.320 --> 0:04:02.680 you know, and so you want to give a lot 0:04:02.720 --> 0:04:07.520 of energy to your relations, to your marriage, to your child. 0:04:07.920 --> 0:04:10.680 And that's why this children's book is. I guess this 0:04:10.840 --> 0:04:15.320 sort of an organic step in the evolution of things, 0:04:15.400 --> 0:04:18.800 you know, because people always ask me to do one, 0:04:19.320 --> 0:04:24.320 you know, because I guess my trajectory of characters and 0:04:24.560 --> 0:04:28.920 this sort of alpha us and Elsa's and these amazing 0:04:29.400 --> 0:04:33.080 young women that have all this incredible power and our 0:04:33.200 --> 0:04:37.120 role models for kids, and it's all about, you know, 0:04:37.720 --> 0:04:42.480 embracing that power and harnessing it and not being afraid 0:04:42.480 --> 0:04:46.440 to send it out into the world. You know, there's 0:04:46.480 --> 0:04:51.440 for some reason. There's the universe has thrown these things 0:04:51.560 --> 0:04:53.520 my way. I don't know if it's the chicken or 0:04:53.560 --> 0:04:57.120 the egg. Is it me, you know, choosing these somehow, 0:04:57.160 --> 0:04:59.640 even though they were jobs I needed and I had 0:04:59.680 --> 0:05:04.120 to do for them. So I think that there's in 0:05:04.160 --> 0:05:09.080 the tradition of those characters. I felt that I wanted 0:05:09.080 --> 0:05:13.560 to write a children's book that was about really me 0:05:13.720 --> 0:05:16.920 having those very similar experiences when I was little, and 0:05:17.400 --> 0:05:20.480 really believing in myself at a young age, really recognizing 0:05:20.520 --> 0:05:24.000 that I had something special to offer, but also being 0:05:24.920 --> 0:05:31.560 hesitant to share it out of fear of being alienated, 0:05:31.720 --> 0:05:35.239 being disliked, feeling like I was calling too much attention 0:05:35.360 --> 0:05:37.599 to myself. How much space can we take up in 0:05:37.600 --> 0:05:42.200 the world, what's allowed? You know, especially as women, I 0:05:42.200 --> 0:05:45.040 think we're always sort of second guessing ourselves. So that's 0:05:45.120 --> 0:05:47.000 what the book's about. But that's what I do with 0:05:47.400 --> 0:05:51.040 as a grown up too. Every day. I'm still second 0:05:51.040 --> 0:05:54.679 guessing when I walk in a room, how much space 0:05:55.000 --> 0:05:58.080 I can take up, how big my voice is literally 0:05:58.360 --> 0:05:59.680 and metaphorically. 0:06:00.320 --> 0:06:02.960 Well, and how do you think your view has changed 0:06:03.240 --> 0:06:06.920 of what you view as important from that time when 0:06:06.960 --> 0:06:10.200 you were like grinding and hustling and busy, working hard 0:06:10.200 --> 0:06:14.000 to now having a bit more I guess structure and 0:06:14.080 --> 0:06:17.720 peace and a bit of arrival feeling, if that makes sense. 0:06:17.800 --> 0:06:20.240 The desperation isn't there, you know, it doesn't mean that 0:06:20.320 --> 0:06:25.679 I'm not still dreaming and there's not things that I 0:06:25.880 --> 0:06:28.719 There are still things I want. There's a lot of 0:06:28.720 --> 0:06:32.560 things that I find still elusive to me. We could 0:06:32.600 --> 0:06:37.080 talk about that. But so I still have ambition, but 0:06:37.440 --> 0:06:41.640 the fear of literally not being able to pay my 0:06:41.760 --> 0:06:47.040 rent or not making good on my commitment to myself 0:06:47.080 --> 0:06:49.960 as a young girl, of working hard to have my 0:06:50.040 --> 0:06:53.200 dream come true. My dreams have come true. I perform 0:06:53.320 --> 0:06:56.720 on a stage, I perform in all these incredible venues 0:06:57.240 --> 0:07:03.760 for thousands of people and Disney Princess Queen for God's sakes, 0:07:03.839 --> 0:07:06.080 you know. So, But you know, the more you get, 0:07:06.120 --> 0:07:09.800 the more you want, and you see things differently through 0:07:09.880 --> 0:07:13.240 different a different lens when you become a mom. 0:07:14.360 --> 0:07:17.400 Yeah, it was two things you hit there which I 0:07:17.600 --> 0:07:19.760 read about you when I I was looking for this interview. 0:07:20.280 --> 0:07:21.920 You said, do you have many dreams? But then one 0:07:21.920 --> 0:07:23.680 of the dreams I've heard you've had is your teeth 0:07:23.680 --> 0:07:27.560 falling out right. I know that's a different time, different 0:07:27.600 --> 0:07:32.240 type of dreams. That's not the kind of dream that Yeah, yeah, 0:07:32.600 --> 0:07:34.760 that's my night. You Have you ever looked into all 0:07:34.760 --> 0:07:35.600 the meetings behind? 0:07:35.880 --> 0:07:37.280 Yeah, it's all about anxiety. 0:07:37.400 --> 0:07:40.440 Have you ever found a meaning that sits well with you, 0:07:40.520 --> 0:07:42.000 that gives you some comfort in life? 0:07:42.080 --> 0:07:45.880 No, not that dream. It's always such anxiety. And that's 0:07:45.880 --> 0:07:47.720 what I've read about it. And I also usually the 0:07:47.720 --> 0:07:49.360 teeth come out and you can hear the sound of 0:07:49.400 --> 0:07:53.320 them slinking against Yeah, I have that one. And I 0:07:53.360 --> 0:07:56.160 have one that I never actually graduated college and I'm 0:07:56.200 --> 0:07:58.560 too credit short. I have it so much that I 0:07:58.600 --> 0:08:00.520 still wake up with a feeling of like, why do 0:08:00.600 --> 0:08:05.240 I feel unseubtled? Oh you think you didn't. Let's a wait, No, 0:08:05.560 --> 0:08:08.200 I was there, I got my diploma. 0:08:08.280 --> 0:08:10.200 Yeah, I get the dream of like I have another 0:08:10.280 --> 0:08:12.960 exam again. I think that's the one that sets me up. 0:08:13.000 --> 0:08:15.280 I'm like, no, I don't want to do another exam. God, 0:08:15.400 --> 0:08:19.280 enough exams in my life. But no, that that that's interesting. 0:08:19.280 --> 0:08:21.320 And yeah, that lack of control, I think that's what 0:08:21.320 --> 0:08:22.840 I've seen it as well, Like when you're losing your 0:08:22.840 --> 0:08:25.440 teeth in a dream, it's like feeling like the anxiety 0:08:25.560 --> 0:08:26.600 and losing control. 0:08:27.240 --> 0:08:29.360 And then then I have cracked a tooth and a 0:08:29.360 --> 0:08:33.880 bagel close like my nightmares coming true, you know whatever, yeah, 0:08:33.960 --> 0:08:37.200 oh my gosh, yeah. 0:08:36.160 --> 0:08:40.360 Yeahs and hearing the teeth that sounds sounds make me 0:08:40.520 --> 0:08:43.560 very like skirmish, I feel like sounds tough. And then 0:08:43.600 --> 0:08:46.840 also with working hard, I mean before this, you used 0:08:46.840 --> 0:08:49.079 to well, not before this, a long time ago, you 0:08:49.160 --> 0:08:52.680 used to perform at the mitzpahs and weddings. Yeah, which 0:08:52.679 --> 0:08:55.720 which one did you prefer? Was there a better one? 0:08:55.760 --> 0:08:58.840 Well? I went through different phases. When I was fifteen 0:08:58.920 --> 0:09:04.360 years old, my parents parents divorced, and I wanted to 0:09:04.360 --> 0:09:06.560 get a job to kind of help out that, you know, 0:09:07.160 --> 0:09:10.559 dad was supporting two households. And my mom started dating 0:09:10.559 --> 0:09:13.680 this guy who was really sweet and saw talent in me. 0:09:14.040 --> 0:09:16.640 And he knew some guy that had a wedding band 0:09:16.679 --> 0:09:19.239 out in Long Island, and he said, you should auditionize. 0:09:19.320 --> 0:09:22.160 I don't know en f songs, you know. And we 0:09:22.240 --> 0:09:24.160 lied about my age because we didn't want them to 0:09:24.200 --> 0:09:25.840 worry that I was still kid, so we said I 0:09:25.880 --> 0:09:30.160 was eighteen, like that's so old. And I started learning 0:09:30.160 --> 0:09:32.200 a bunch of songs. I put on kind of a 0:09:32.240 --> 0:09:37.680 slutty dress and I went in and I sang what 0:09:37.800 --> 0:09:41.800 I sing back, I'm dating myself, but I sang Evergreen 0:09:41.960 --> 0:09:44.839 like a Barber Streisen sung, and I sang We're walking 0:09:44.880 --> 0:09:48.000 on sunshine. Oh, I remember I saying a flash dance song. Anyway, 0:09:48.080 --> 0:09:51.840 and I got the job and I started working all 0:09:51.880 --> 0:09:54.439 the time, weddings, permits, visit, it didn't matter. They all 0:09:54.440 --> 0:10:00.000 can be bad because nobody's listening. They can be really wonderful, 0:10:00.280 --> 0:10:04.400 especially for a young girl becoming trying to figure out 0:10:04.440 --> 0:10:07.360 my identity as a vocalist, having to learn so many 0:10:07.440 --> 0:10:15.240 kinds of genres of music, you know, like motown, pop, rock, jazz. 0:10:16.920 --> 0:10:20.680 So I really that was kind of my education of music. 0:10:20.760 --> 0:10:23.400 And I'm working. There's a lot of incredible musicians that 0:10:23.520 --> 0:10:25.720 do it as a side gig just to make extra money. 0:10:25.840 --> 0:10:28.839 So the good thing about people not listening is you 0:10:28.960 --> 0:10:32.480 can try a lot of it. And one of my 0:10:32.600 --> 0:10:35.760 favorite times would be when they say, like ladies and gentlemen, 0:10:36.120 --> 0:10:38.560 please take your seat, your salad is being served, and 0:10:38.600 --> 0:10:41.719 then the band would take a break except for me 0:10:41.840 --> 0:10:44.800 and like the keyboard player, and then we'd sing, you know, 0:10:44.840 --> 0:10:48.120 a Billie Holiday Tune or Eli Fitzgerald. And at a 0:10:48.160 --> 0:10:52.079 young age, I learned what melody is and I would 0:10:52.080 --> 0:10:55.000 listen to them on the car ride to the gig, 0:10:55.360 --> 0:10:59.600 and then I'd learned what I was contributing to it, 0:11:00.080 --> 0:11:06.720 how to improvise, and where were my instincts, my impulses 0:11:06.800 --> 0:11:11.280 as a singer. And so I actually still identify with 0:11:12.280 --> 0:11:15.880 I still see myself as that girl, the chick gig singer, 0:11:16.120 --> 0:11:18.160 a wedding singer. And it's been so much longer that 0:11:18.240 --> 0:11:21.800 I've not been that than I was, but I still 0:11:21.880 --> 0:11:24.720 just feel like that's who I am when I'm on stage. 0:11:24.760 --> 0:11:27.800 I could be at Madison Square Garden. I'm still with 0:11:27.840 --> 0:11:32.440 my band. I want a jam. I'm okay with spontaneity. 0:11:32.840 --> 0:11:34.640 You walk on. I was fifteen years old, and they 0:11:34.640 --> 0:11:36.240 call it tune. You have to call it in the 0:11:36.320 --> 0:11:38.079 right key. You have to know the lyrics. If you 0:11:38.120 --> 0:11:40.080 don't know the lyrics, you tape. Now they have iPads, 0:11:40.080 --> 0:11:43.520 but I would pull out a little Rolodex cheat sheets 0:11:43.520 --> 0:11:45.560 and I'd tape them to the mic and I'd sing 0:11:45.600 --> 0:11:48.240 the songs. Like I said, nobody's paying attention to the band, 0:11:48.320 --> 0:11:52.640 so they don't see but I still identify as that person, 0:11:52.880 --> 0:11:55.040 and no matter what when I go to a wet 0:11:55.080 --> 0:11:57.600 someone else's wedding or burmits, or when I get paid 0:11:58.000 --> 0:12:01.480 to like a lot of money to be a guest 0:12:01.679 --> 0:12:04.560 or somebody's and sing a couple. So wow, and I'm 0:12:04.600 --> 0:12:07.480 really taking back. So I'm like, I used to make 0:12:07.480 --> 0:12:10.400 a hundred bucks, you know, for the night to sing, 0:12:10.559 --> 0:12:14.800 and then I'm up there and I still feel like 0:12:14.920 --> 0:12:19.520 that that unknown girl just trying to do a great 0:12:19.640 --> 0:12:21.319 job and get the song done. 0:12:21.679 --> 0:12:25.079 That's amazing. Yeah, that's incredible. What are the next steps? 0:12:25.080 --> 0:12:27.600 Like when you when you hear about that experience that 0:12:27.640 --> 0:12:31.040 you're in and I am doing a bit of biography 0:12:31.120 --> 0:12:33.600 chatting because I do find it fascinating, Like, you know, 0:12:33.880 --> 0:12:35.199 you look at the stage you're on today and you 0:12:35.480 --> 0:12:37.360 look back there and you're like, wow, that's that's a 0:12:37.400 --> 0:12:41.640 long long way. And I think it's easy externally to 0:12:41.679 --> 0:12:43.920 be like, oh yeah, there was these line of great 0:12:43.960 --> 0:12:45.760 things that happened and it took off, But like what's 0:12:45.800 --> 0:12:51.720 the next step from that? Like happen like the pretty 0:12:51.760 --> 0:12:54.640 much immediately like after you're doing that and guessing is 0:12:54.679 --> 0:12:57.960 that building your confidence? Is it just allowing you to 0:12:58.080 --> 0:13:00.439 pay for a few things on the side, like what 0:13:00.520 --> 0:13:01.240 is that doing for you? 0:13:01.320 --> 0:13:04.640 To be a working singer? To make a living as 0:13:04.640 --> 0:13:06.960 a singer, especially at that age, was a source of 0:13:07.280 --> 0:13:11.520 deep pride ye me. Then as I kept getting rejected 0:13:11.520 --> 0:13:14.320 at auditions, I was writing my own music. I was 0:13:14.320 --> 0:13:16.880 trying to get a record deal. Nothing was happening. Now 0:13:16.920 --> 0:13:19.680 I'm doing it six seven years. Now, I'm getting a 0:13:19.679 --> 0:13:21.240 little bit annoyed. 0:13:21.440 --> 0:13:23.200 You were seeing a weddings and but mins was for 0:13:23.240 --> 0:13:23.960 like six seven. 0:13:24.080 --> 0:13:25.960 Yeah. It go in and out depending. When I was 0:13:25.960 --> 0:13:29.000 in college, I went to NYU, and certain semesters it 0:13:29.040 --> 0:13:31.400 was rough, but then other semesters I could pick up 0:13:31.440 --> 0:13:35.600 gigs and so then I would be a little bit 0:13:35.640 --> 0:13:38.520 more I'd like to say disgruntled. And I'd stand and 0:13:38.600 --> 0:13:41.760 I think I'm doing this when I'm thirty, you know, 0:13:41.800 --> 0:13:45.240 I'm quitting the business. And I get in trouble the band. 0:13:45.480 --> 0:13:47.800 The band leader would say, you have an attitude today, 0:13:47.800 --> 0:13:50.920 and I'd be thinking, because I just I'm going to 0:13:51.000 --> 0:13:52.959 be something one day. You know, I'm going to get 0:13:53.000 --> 0:13:57.600 out of here, so I forget where your question, Well, no, 0:13:57.679 --> 0:13:59.600 my question is that I do What was the next 0:13:59.640 --> 0:14:02.440 thing like that, is that that's do you're doing exactly 0:14:02.440 --> 0:14:05.439 what it's asking, like that idea that you're going to auditions, 0:14:05.480 --> 0:14:06.679 What were you auditioning for? 0:14:06.840 --> 0:14:08.680 Like what was well important to you at that? 0:14:08.760 --> 0:14:10.760 Yeah. So when I was a little girl, my parents 0:14:10.840 --> 0:14:13.000 took me and I grew up in Long Island, they 0:14:13.040 --> 0:14:15.000 take me into the city to see Broadway shows. I 0:14:15.040 --> 0:14:17.839 wanted to be on Broadway. Then when I started doing 0:14:17.840 --> 0:14:19.840 all these weddings and seeing all these kinds of music, 0:14:19.840 --> 0:14:24.440 I started writing my own music, and my taste evolved 0:14:24.560 --> 0:14:26.280 with the kind of music that I wanted to sing, 0:14:26.800 --> 0:14:29.520 and so then I wanted my own record deal and 0:14:29.640 --> 0:14:34.760 wanted to make albums, and so I would now also 0:14:35.000 --> 0:14:37.480 put rock bands together, and I'd go play at CBGB's 0:14:37.480 --> 0:14:39.960 and at the Bitter End in the village, and so 0:14:40.080 --> 0:14:41.800 that started to be the thing that I wanted. And 0:14:41.840 --> 0:14:48.760 then I finally, at finally, at twenty five, I got 0:14:48.800 --> 0:14:52.440 the original cast of Rent, which was the big rock 0:14:52.760 --> 0:14:55.480 musical of the time, but it was theater, but it 0:14:55.520 --> 0:14:58.400 was rock. And so that started me on this sort 0:14:58.440 --> 0:15:03.560 of path of kind of straddling both worlds always, which 0:15:04.680 --> 0:15:08.160 back then in the nineties it was not it was 0:15:08.200 --> 0:15:11.480 frowned upon to try to go from theater to legitimate 0:15:11.640 --> 0:15:14.840 rock pop kind of career. Now everyone can do everything, 0:15:15.240 --> 0:15:17.120 but back then you didn't. If you're a movie star, 0:15:17.160 --> 0:15:20.760 you didn't do TV. And if you were a theater person, 0:15:20.880 --> 0:15:24.480 you weren't going to be people wouldn't believe you as 0:15:24.520 --> 0:15:27.960 a as a rock star. But here I was kind 0:15:28.000 --> 0:15:31.240 of in both, and so I did that dance for 0:15:31.320 --> 0:15:34.680 a long time. And now you get to the point 0:15:34.680 --> 0:15:37.160 where you've done so many different things and so many 0:15:37.160 --> 0:15:40.600 I put out so many kinds of albums and that 0:15:40.720 --> 0:15:43.200 I can get on stage and I don't care that 0:15:43.320 --> 0:15:46.520 I'm one particular style because now my body of work 0:15:46.680 --> 0:15:49.160 is who I am. But it's taken me all that 0:15:49.320 --> 0:15:53.680 time to feel like I have a story and identity, 0:15:53.720 --> 0:15:55.640 because back then it was like, look, who are you? 0:15:55.760 --> 0:15:57.640 What kind of singer are you? What are you going 0:15:57.720 --> 0:15:59.560 to be? What do you represent? And I said, well, 0:15:59.560 --> 0:16:01.440 I can do and I can do motown, and I 0:16:01.480 --> 0:16:04.240 can do Madonna and when you use it and rock 0:16:04.320 --> 0:16:07.400 and roll, and so my versatility was my curse. 0:16:07.680 --> 0:16:09.960 Wow, and what were you doing by age thirty? Because 0:16:10.000 --> 0:16:11.280 you said, when I get to if I'm doing this 0:16:11.320 --> 0:16:13.520 by thirty, I'm going to quit what were you actually doing. 0:16:13.320 --> 0:16:17.280 When I was in a workshop of Wicked. Okay, so 0:16:17.280 --> 0:16:20.280 I was hired to develop Wicked, which was a five 0:16:20.360 --> 0:16:23.880 year process, and ever after every workshop of that, I 0:16:23.880 --> 0:16:25.920 always thought they were going to replace me with someone 0:16:26.080 --> 0:16:28.440 more famous or something, and so I always thought I 0:16:28.480 --> 0:16:29.920 was going to get fired. So the fact that I 0:16:29.960 --> 0:16:34.160 actually got to the Gershwin Theater when I was I 0:16:34.160 --> 0:16:37.200 don't know, thirty two, I was like, who, you know? 0:16:37.320 --> 0:16:39.320 You always think you're going to get fired in this business. 0:16:39.680 --> 0:16:41.600 So when they bring you into develop and part of 0:16:41.600 --> 0:16:44.520 my ignorance, yes, so they're bringing you into develops and 0:16:44.560 --> 0:16:46.560 what is that? What does that actually mean? Does that 0:16:46.640 --> 0:16:48.560 mean you might make it into the show or you're 0:16:48.560 --> 0:16:49.520 in the behind the scenes. 0:16:49.760 --> 0:16:53.600 They say they're looking for their amuses, you know, and 0:16:53.640 --> 0:16:56.360 so they'd like to find the people that they are 0:16:56.400 --> 0:17:00.360 writing for, because the composers are writing and for your voice, 0:17:00.440 --> 0:17:03.920 and which is like the greatest honor that was Rent 0:17:04.000 --> 0:17:06.080 was like that as well, and most of the things 0:17:06.119 --> 0:17:09.159 I do because their original musicals they go through these 0:17:09.200 --> 0:17:13.040 long developmental processes, which I love. I love standing on 0:17:13.160 --> 0:17:18.359 a piano and an incredibly talented composer like Steven Schwartz 0:17:18.480 --> 0:17:22.439 or Tom kitt or Jonathan Larson, and they say, figure 0:17:22.440 --> 0:17:25.560 out where my voice sits and how they want to 0:17:25.560 --> 0:17:28.320 write something so that I can soar, you know, and 0:17:28.480 --> 0:17:34.480 the character can soar. Sometimes that guests confused, but or 0:17:34.480 --> 0:17:35.639 it's one and the same. 0:17:35.480 --> 0:17:36.119 I guess. 0:17:36.240 --> 0:17:39.439 But I love that process so much. And what it 0:17:39.520 --> 0:17:41.399 is is you go in a room, usually in like 0:17:41.440 --> 0:17:44.159 a regular rehearsal room, and sometimes they only have the 0:17:44.200 --> 0:17:46.880 first act. Sometimes they have the whole thing, but then 0:17:46.920 --> 0:17:49.040 they so you do like a little reading of it 0:17:49.080 --> 0:17:51.680 for a bunch of people, investors, and then everyone gives notes. 0:17:51.680 --> 0:17:54.600 And then six months later they've scrapped a bunch of things. 0:17:54.840 --> 0:17:56.760 Maybe they took a song out of Act two and 0:17:56.800 --> 0:17:59.080 put it in F one, and now that offsets the 0:17:59.119 --> 0:18:01.679 whole balance. And then and this part sucks, but this 0:18:01.760 --> 0:18:04.439 part's really working, you know, and they keep having to 0:18:05.080 --> 0:18:08.200 and you just go with the flow. And I find 0:18:08.200 --> 0:18:10.240 it fascinating that whole process. 0:18:10.800 --> 0:18:13.040 Yeah, No, it's interesting hearing about it as a fan 0:18:13.080 --> 0:18:15.760 of Broadway. I always have been in the West End 0:18:15.760 --> 0:18:18.320 in London where I grew up, and then Broadway here. 0:18:18.760 --> 0:18:21.679 It's interesting knowing how it works because I think you 0:18:21.720 --> 0:18:23.639 take for granted that some of these things, the amount 0:18:23.680 --> 0:18:26.920 of time they take in development before we even see them. 0:18:27.040 --> 0:18:30.679 It's funny. I did Wicket at the West End for 0:18:30.800 --> 0:18:33.720 six months a year and a half after I left 0:18:33.720 --> 0:18:35.600 it here in New York. I always wanted to open 0:18:35.640 --> 0:18:37.199 a show on the West End. To me, that was 0:18:37.280 --> 0:18:41.600 the most prestigious thing to do, and I had one 0:18:41.600 --> 0:18:44.160 of the greatest times of my life. I had two 0:18:44.160 --> 0:18:47.080 Australians starring with me, who taught me how to party 0:18:47.119 --> 0:18:49.920 and do hos a week, which I think I only 0:18:50.000 --> 0:18:53.320 learned that because they like to take credit for that, 0:18:53.359 --> 0:18:55.880 but I also think it's because I had already wanted Tony. 0:18:56.000 --> 0:18:58.160 I knew I wasn't going to get fired. I knew 0:18:58.160 --> 0:19:01.280 how to pace myself hos a week. The pressure was 0:19:01.320 --> 0:19:03.520 off me and so I could go to the pub after. 0:19:04.119 --> 0:19:07.399 But you know, when when you're in the beginnings of 0:19:07.400 --> 0:19:10.600 a show, you're just you know, you're you're a monk, yes, 0:19:10.760 --> 0:19:13.280 and you don't do anything and you go home and 0:19:13.359 --> 0:19:16.760 you watch movies and you don't drink alcohol and you 0:19:16.800 --> 0:19:19.400 know so, and that can be kind of lonely. 0:19:19.760 --> 0:19:22.720 Yeah, those schedules seem just insane. I was with a 0:19:22.720 --> 0:19:26.920 friend recently, they're piloting a show in San Diego at 0:19:26.960 --> 0:19:30.960 the Old Globe Theater to try and take it into Broadway, 0:19:31.000 --> 0:19:32.560 and so I was watching her and she was telling 0:19:32.600 --> 0:19:34.760 me about her schedule, and then we just I just 0:19:34.800 --> 0:19:38.359 went and saw the music Man this Sunday and like 0:19:38.400 --> 0:19:40.000 watching you do that, and I was it was just 0:19:40.400 --> 0:19:42.960 it's fascinating to me to think just what a tough 0:19:43.000 --> 0:19:46.119 schedule that is. It's exhaust yeah, it's And how do 0:19:46.200 --> 0:19:49.000 you like? What were your coping mechanisms the first time round? 0:19:49.080 --> 0:19:50.360 Like not when you'd won the tourny. 0:19:50.400 --> 0:19:54.480 First time with friends? I I lost my boy well, 0:19:54.560 --> 0:19:58.320 I started I was abusing my voice. I didn't I would. 0:19:58.359 --> 0:19:59.879 I took boys lesson in my whole life, but I 0:20:00.000 --> 0:20:03.240 stop going to my teacher at one point, and I 0:20:03.400 --> 0:20:05.240 just had never even though I was singing all those 0:20:05.280 --> 0:20:07.560 gigs at the weddings, I had never done eight shows 0:20:07.600 --> 0:20:10.680 a week, and so I had to look go back 0:20:10.720 --> 0:20:13.920 to a teacher and address all the different problem spots 0:20:13.920 --> 0:20:15.639 in the show for myself. And then I ended up 0:20:15.680 --> 0:20:17.760 being stronger than ever and then it's never happened to 0:20:17.760 --> 0:20:21.520 me again. But back then, you know, the I don't know, 0:20:21.560 --> 0:20:24.760 if you're familiar with Jonathan Larson, who wrote he was 0:20:24.760 --> 0:20:27.080 a composer of I don't, but I know. He passed 0:20:27.080 --> 0:20:30.320 away early on in our process, and it was a 0:20:30.440 --> 0:20:33.680 very emotional time for all of us, and we all 0:20:33.800 --> 0:20:38.000 felt so committed to never missing a show because we 0:20:38.119 --> 0:20:40.919 just felt like our mission was to show up and 0:20:41.720 --> 0:20:45.919 communicate his message, you know. So for six months, not 0:20:45.960 --> 0:20:47.919 one of us missed a show. I was actually the 0:20:47.920 --> 0:20:50.440 first one because the doctor ordered me to have voice 0:20:50.440 --> 0:20:54.520 for us, and I've never had a cast do that ever. 0:20:54.720 --> 0:20:58.560 I realized that was very rare that people wouldn't miss 0:20:58.600 --> 0:21:01.760 a show for six months. That's so that was a 0:21:01.760 --> 0:21:04.960