Speaker 1: Hello, what's up? How's it going? How is life? Uh?
Speaker 1: This is gek Mail. This is a segment of my
Speaker 1: show that I do where I read viewer mail and
Speaker 1: talk about it. You know, people send me words, they
Speaker 1: send stuff to therapy Gecko mail at gmail dot com,
Speaker 1: and I respond to it. In the last gek Mail,
Speaker 1: I took phone calls while I was doing emails, and
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna do that today. And the reason is
Speaker 1: that I don't feel like it. This is I'm this.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna make this podcast in particular, This episode in
Speaker 1: particular is gonna be a selfish endeavor, and I'm going
Speaker 1: to be the only voice that you will hear for
Speaker 1: the duration of the episode. Maybe next episode I'll bring
Speaker 1: calls back. I don't no, it depends on my mood.
Speaker 1: And today I'm actually in a chill mood. Today. I'm
Speaker 1: in Tokyo. Right now, I'm in Tokyo. I'm just hanging
Speaker 1: out here and it's pretty sweet. It's pretty great. I
Speaker 1: am in a hotel room wearing a Gecko costume, speaking
Speaker 1: into a microphone, looking at a bunch of unread emails.
Speaker 1: I was on the phone yesterday with my mom for
Speaker 1: like forty five minutes. It is great. You should call
Speaker 1: your mom. If you're lucky enough that your mom is
Speaker 1: around and you guys have a good relationship, you should
Speaker 1: call your mom. I called my mom and I found
Speaker 1: out apparently my grandfather. I was talking to my mom
Speaker 1: about like Japan, and my mom randomly was I didn't
Speaker 1: know this, but my mom was like, apparently my grandfather
Speaker 1: like spent four months out of the year in Japan
Speaker 1: for like twenty years, and like spoke fluent Japanese. And
Speaker 1: my mom was like, Oh, your grandfather would be super
Speaker 1: happy that you're running around in Japan. And I'm like, oh,
Speaker 1: that's pretty cool. That's pretty cool. So I don't know,
Speaker 1: I feel I feel I feel good, and I feel relaxed,
Speaker 1: and I feel happy, and I'm ready to just kind
Speaker 1: of hang out and take some emails. So wherever you
Speaker 1: are in the world listening to this, I hope you're
Speaker 1: feeling chill too, And let's have a chill time reading
Speaker 1: some emails, shall we. Okay? This is from Jamie. Subject line,
Speaker 1: Hey Lyle, what color is your pee? Oh? This is
Speaker 1: a long Okay, this email is too long for me
Speaker 1: to read. You know, I'll read you know, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: I'm gonna just read this until I don't want to anymore. Okay,
Speaker 1: this is from Jamie. Sorry for the intrusive question, but
Speaker 1: I've had the color green on my mind lately, and
Speaker 1: I was wondering why the color of my pea has
Speaker 1: such a significant impact on my mood. All right, I'm intrigued,
Speaker 1: all right. Line by line, I'm gonna decide whether I
Speaker 1: want to keep reading this email, and after that line,
Speaker 1: I'm down to keep reading a bit about me. My
Speaker 1: favorite color is sage. What the fuck is sage? Because
Speaker 1: I like that shade of green and I recently quit
Speaker 1: my job with nothing else lined up. So don't worry,
Speaker 1: except I'm gonna okay. Except I'm in a fortunate position
Speaker 1: as it stands, so don't worry. I'm okay on the
Speaker 1: job front. I have a step mom who works slash
Speaker 1: manages in a company responsible for local recruitment. It's mostly
Speaker 1: factory work, but her clients are always outsourcing. What Okay,
Speaker 1: this has nothing to do with pe Okay, Yeah, I
Speaker 1: don't want to keep reading this email. Let's do another one,
Speaker 1: all right. This is from N eight, subject line I
Speaker 1: jumped off a balcony at a party and broke my ankle.
Speaker 1: Ghek I did a dun Three weeks ago. I was
Speaker 1: at a holiday party and was super drunk. There was
Speaker 1: an indoor balcony overlooking the main level where the majority
Speaker 1: of the people were. Fifty people watched me jump fifteen
Speaker 1: feet off the balcony onto a couch. It was gonna
Speaker 1: be so epic. Unfortunately, my left foot missed the couch
Speaker 1: and took all the impact at a weird angle, which
Speaker 1: resulted in my ankle traumatically dislocating. My foot was on
Speaker 1: a fifty My foot was at a forty five degree angle,
Speaker 1: and the whole room freaked out. It was honestly really funny,
Speaker 1: But as the pain set in, I began to realize
Speaker 1: this was going to seriously affect my life for a while.
Speaker 1: Was that really? You know, I have a lot of
Speaker 1: You know, Nate, if you're listening to this, I have
Speaker 1: a lot of respect for you because I like that
Speaker 1: your first thought when your fucking foot turned forty five
Speaker 1: degrees is that it was funny. That's a good way
Speaker 1: to look at life. You know, you get hit by
Speaker 1: a car, that's probably funny to someone watching you. You
Speaker 1: get diagnosed with cancer. That's so, that's a just God's
Speaker 1: sense of humor. You get your arm cut off by
Speaker 1: a machine and a freak accident, it's funny. It is funny.
Speaker 1: It is funny. Okay, anyway, have you ever broken a bone?
Speaker 1: I know you're not into thrills. How do you know
Speaker 1: I'm not into thrills. I like thrills. Actually, that's that's true.
Speaker 1: I'm not into thrills at all. I hate doing stuff
Speaker 1: where I could possibly get hurt. Have you ever done
Speaker 1: anything this dumb? Yeah, that's what he said. Have you
Speaker 1: ever done anything this dumb? Uh? Yeah. Yeah. When I
Speaker 1: was younger, I would jump off of stuff and then yeah,
Speaker 1: like at the like on the playgrounds, I would jump
Speaker 1: off of high platforms and I remember I did it
Speaker 1: once and I had a little limp for a while.
Speaker 1: But I've never broken a bone because I usually if
Speaker 1: I'm gonna jump off of something, I make mathematical propositions
Speaker 1: in my head to tell me whether or not I
Speaker 1: will get sincerely hurt. But again, I'm glad that you
Speaker 1: had a good sense of humor about this. And yes,
Speaker 1: this probably is going to seriously affect your life for
Speaker 1: a while. But I just want to let me just
Speaker 1: if I could give you this advice, Nate, whatever it
Speaker 1: is that was really funny to you about this when
Speaker 1: it first happened. Don't lose that, Okay. So when you're
Speaker 1: looking at your when you're like in a wheelchair or
Speaker 1: on crutches or whatever, like just every once in a while,
Speaker 1: just look down at your foot and just start laughing.
Speaker 1: Just realize that it's funny that your ankle is fucked up,
Speaker 1: and you'll be good. You'll be good. I think this
Speaker 1: guy's gonna be okay. This is from Michael. Subject line
Speaker 1: terrifying mushroom trips with a talking snake. All right, we
Speaker 1: got Harry Potter calling in. Hey, Lyle, I am Michael.
Speaker 1: I have been a long time listener. About a year ago,
Speaker 1: I took a large dose of penis envy mushrooms and
Speaker 1: had a terrifying trip in my apartment. At first, it
Speaker 1: started like any other trip, but then I started to
Speaker 1: feel nauseous and went to lie down in my bed
Speaker 1: and ended up closing my eyes. At first, the usual
Speaker 1: shapes like flower of life would appear and pulsate bright
Speaker 1: alternating colors. At what is the flower of life? I'm
Speaker 1: googling this. Hold on pausing the email here. Flower of Life.
Speaker 1: Flower of Life is a geometric symbol made of overlapping
Speaker 1: circles that represents life, creation, and unity. Okay, so yeah,
Speaker 1: you close your eyes and you see oh I did.
Speaker 1: Oh okay, yeah, okay, I've seen this before when I've
Speaker 1: closed my eyes and stuff, but I didn't know I
Speaker 1: had a name. I like that. After a while, the
Speaker 1: shapes disappeared, and instead I started seeing myself through a dark, purplish,
Speaker 1: purplish haze. Then I saw myself die in many horrible
Speaker 1: ways suicide, car crash, murder, choking, and a few dozen
Speaker 1: other ways. During this trip, I hallucinated the vivid moments
Speaker 1: and the aftermaths of these deaths. The trip really freaked
Speaker 1: me out, and I ended up throwing my stash of
Speaker 1: shrooms away because of this. Several months went by after
Speaker 1: that trip, and I periodically ruminated about what I had experienced.
Speaker 1: I wasn't sure what to make of it, and decided
Speaker 1: to take another large dose of the same type of
Speaker 1: mushroom with the intention of figuring out what the trip meant,
Speaker 1: if anything. So I took the shrooms, and once again
Speaker 1: I started to feel nauseous. Just like before, I went
Speaker 1: to lie down in my bed and closed my eyes.
Speaker 1: The same shapes appeared, the same colors, but this time,
Speaker 1: instead of the visuals transitioning into a purple haze, I
Speaker 1: saw a massive infinity symbol. This infinity symbol was moving
Speaker 1: and had iridescent scales. I'm so surprised I was able
Speaker 1: to read the word iridescent. But here we go, and
Speaker 1: once I noticed the scales, a serpent's head appeared. I
Speaker 1: wasn't terrified, but intrigued and curious. I spoke aloud to
Speaker 1: the serpent, what was the meaning behind the visions of
Speaker 1: myself that I saw before? The serpent responded it said,
Speaker 1: you have died a million deaths and will die a
Speaker 1: million more. This made me extremely unsettled, and I asked
Speaker 1: the serpent why. It told me that I was a prisoner,
Speaker 1: that every life in this universe is bound to a
Speaker 1: cycle of death for eternity, where we exist and die
Speaker 1: only to experience variations of suffering with each life as
Speaker 1: our punishment. I immediately asked what did we do? What
Speaker 1: did I do? But the vision started fading and the
Speaker 1: trip was winding down. Since then, I haven't touched a
Speaker 1: mushroom since I am still confused about how I should
Speaker 1: interpret the ordeal and was wondering if you could give
Speaker 1: me some perspective to process the entire experience. Also, should
Speaker 1: I try to trip again and discover more. Thanks for
Speaker 1: all you do and providing rational perspectives for our listeners.
Speaker 1: I'm okay, I'm about I'm about to be a bummer.
Speaker 1: Can I be a bummer? Michael, I'm going to be
Speaker 1: a bummer here. I'm gonna be I just by the way, Okay.
Speaker 1: I want everyone to know because I know that I'm
Speaker 1: about to say some stuff that they're gonna piss people
Speaker 1: off in comments sections and whatnot. I'm just letting you know.
Speaker 1: This is what my gut is telling me in response
Speaker 1: to this email, and I am open to being wrong.
Speaker 1: But look, man, here's the thing. I'm not super duper
Speaker 1: sould on like hallucinations really being anything more than just hallucinations.
Speaker 1: I think this right. I think that, like like, I
Speaker 1: believe in the subconscious, and I believe that, like you know,
Speaker 1: traumas and desires and thoughts and feelings exist in our
Speaker 1: subconscious and things like dreams and hallucinations can kind of
Speaker 1: bring those to the surface. And so maybe, you know,
Speaker 1: maybe I'm wrong. Maybe in that case, the hallucinations, uh,
Speaker 1: you know, do mean something. They mean things that you
Speaker 1: were already thinking about. And so I'm curious with this,
Speaker 1: What is it that you were already thinking about by like,
Speaker 1: this serpent is just you. You're not You're not contacting
Speaker 1: anything outside of your own self. Your serpent is you? This?
Speaker 1: This this snake? Okay? And so what did the snake
Speaker 1: say just said that? What is the meaning behind the
Speaker 1: Why why did it hold on? Why did it make
Speaker 1: you unsettled that the snake said, you've died a million
Speaker 1: deaths and will die a million more. It sounds like
Speaker 1: a fairly standard cycle. I don't I don't really know
Speaker 1: what happens after we die, but I it would makes
Speaker 1: sense to me that we die and then whatever the
Speaker 1: fuck it is that you know, propel whatever, our carbon
Speaker 1: or whatever the fuck goes back into the ground, and
Speaker 1: our ego dissolves and all of our memories dissolve. But
Speaker 1: like are the physical energy that we use to power
Speaker 1: our bodies, and shit like goes into the ground and
Speaker 1: you know, becomes like a dog or a lady bug
Speaker 1: or a or a piece of tape or something, and
Speaker 1: then you know, eventually the dog dies and the piece
Speaker 1: of tape gets like stuck to your finger and you
Speaker 1: have to and you kind of have to throw it away,
Speaker 1: and then you know, everything dies, and then I guess
Speaker 1: it's born. So yeah, I mean, yeah, you are in
Speaker 1: a cycle in that sense. Yeah, every Yeah, like you said,
Speaker 1: every life in the universe, I guess it is bound
Speaker 1: to a cycle of death. Sure, this is probably everything
Speaker 1: I'm Everything I'm saying is probably just something you were
Speaker 1: already thinking about in your just you know, as a
Speaker 1: human being as you try to answer your existential questions.
Speaker 1: Everything I'm saying is something you probably already thought about,
Speaker 1: and the serpent is just telling you. The serpent is
Speaker 1: just coming to conclusions for you that you've already been
Speaker 1: kind of inching towards in your head. But remember, there's
Speaker 1: no serpent, it's just you. You're just talking to yourself. So
Speaker 1: I was about I was about to go on a
Speaker 1: whole bummer thing about how, yeah, you took a drug
Speaker 1: and you're hallucinated and that's what drugs do. But I'm
Speaker 1: willing to believe that that not that not I'd like,
Speaker 1: I don't think you contacted a serpent. Like I don't
Speaker 1: think you left your own brain, but you went into
Speaker 1: your subconscious and this is what your subconscious had to say. Uh,
Speaker 1: should you trip again? No, you shouldn't. You should go
Speaker 1: for a walk and drink some water and eat a
Speaker 1: piece of eat a fucking banana and some peanut butter,
Speaker 1: and you should never do mushrooms ever again. Okay, okay,
Speaker 1: this is from Brendan subject line are Dorito's bread? Are
Speaker 1: Dorito's bread? Hey? Gek. A few years ago at my
Speaker 1: bachelor party, me and my buddies were drunk and made
Speaker 1: a bunch of little turkey and cheese sandwiches using two
Speaker 1: full sized Doritos as the bread. Does this make Dorito's bread? No,
Speaker 1: that's a stupid question. Also, I like to call jet
Speaker 1: Skis botor cycles because they are the motorcycles of the sea.
Speaker 1: That's a stupid question. The Dorito's bread thing. But I
Speaker 1: really I like whoever wrote this email a lot, because
Speaker 1: they they this. Whoever wrote this, This guy Brendan. He
Speaker 1: lives life by his own rules. No any every like
Speaker 1: you know what? Yeah, called jet Ski's motorcycles. That's not wrong.
Speaker 1: All all things are only anything because the collective society,
Speaker 1: the collective everything is only called something because like there's
Speaker 1: some collective consciousness of society said it was that. But
Speaker 1: let me tell you something. You're powerful as a human being.
Speaker 1: I'm going on, I'm going fucking full on motivational speaker today. Okay.
Speaker 1: You're powerful, Brendan because you have the power to break
Speaker 1: away from the collective consciousness and decide in your own
Speaker 1: fucking reality that jet skis are called motorcycles and Dorito's
Speaker 1: are brand and I, in my own reality, also have
Speaker 1: the ability to declare that to be stupid, and we
Speaker 1: can both live together and make out and be harmonious
Speaker 1: with one another. And for that reason, I love you
Speaker 1: very much, Brendan. Okay, let's see here, all right. This
Speaker 1: is from someone who told me not to read their
Speaker 1: name on the stream, all right. This is from the
Speaker 1: whatever Jessica hi Gek in the Fall, I twenty six
Speaker 1: F matched with a girl twenty nine f on the apps.
Speaker 1: We hit it off right away and arranged a date
Speaker 1: for the next night. Hold on, let make sure I'm
Speaker 1: recording this all right? I am. We were supposed to
Speaker 1: meet up at a bar, but that got canceled. Due
Speaker 1: to one of her pets going to the emergency vet. Still,
Speaker 1: she invited me over to her place despite the fact,
Speaker 1: so I headed over with a bottle of wine, not
Speaker 1: knowing what to expect. Drove over and we were hanging out,
Speaker 1: just chit chatting. I learned on the date that she
Speaker 1: cams and does a lot of dom work online. I
Speaker 1: even got a tour of the room where she does
Speaker 1: her streams. She showed me all of the toys she uses,
Speaker 1: and I got to see her sink filled to the
Speaker 1: brim with dildos and butt plugs. We got food ordered
Speaker 1: to the house. She then invited me to jump into
Speaker 1: her hot tub. That's awesome. We made out under the
Speaker 1: full moon in the hot tub while it was raining.
Speaker 1: We moved things inside the house shortly after and had
Speaker 1: a good time. We hung out a little bit. Slash
Speaker 1: was texting a lot, but as of late November, I
Speaker 1: got ghosted. This was probably one of the craziest things
Speaker 1: I have ever done. She was a cool person, but
Speaker 1: I'm disappointed she didn't give me any proper closure to
Speaker 1: our weird situationship thing from k uh Yet. You know
Speaker 1: it's a bummer. It's a bummer when like if you
Speaker 1: go on a date with someone and you have an
Speaker 1: awesome time and then you get ghosted and you get
Speaker 1: you'll feel you get a little butt hurt. You're like,
Speaker 1: why didn't I get proper closure? And I think I
Speaker 1: I one of the greatest superpowers I think you can
Speaker 1: develop is uh And it's hard. It's hard, But like,
Speaker 1: if you can give yourself closure and kinda take this
Speaker 1: evening and go to you, if you can just get
Speaker 1: give yourself closure and just take this evening for what
Speaker 1: it is, right, I mean, that's like a microcosm for
Speaker 1: all of life. All of life is just fucking you know,
Speaker 1: anytime you get a anytime anything good happens to you,
Speaker 1: you have a good day, you have a good fucking minute,
Speaker 1: you have a sip of water. Yeez. Every life is
Speaker 1: really about taking whatever you can get. And so if
Speaker 1: you got to have a fun now, if you got
Speaker 1: to make out with a hot lady in a hot
Speaker 1: tub while she shows you her fucking a stream den
Speaker 1: under the full moon, like you got to have that night.
Speaker 1: You know, a lot many people don't even get to
Speaker 1: have the one good night. Most people have not had
Speaker 1: a good night in their lives. Their lives have just
Speaker 1: been toiling in dirt for forever. That's most of all
Speaker 1: of life for most people has been rolling around in
Speaker 1: dirt and starving to death. So you're either fact that
Speaker 1: you got even one night or you made out with
Speaker 1: a hot lady in a hot tub. I mean, pretty good,
Speaker 1: pretty good. Is it a bummer that it didn't work
Speaker 1: out into anything else? For Yeah, for sure, it's a bummer.
Speaker 1: And you know, I like, take a second to grieve it,
Speaker 1: be like, take a second, take a second to be
Speaker 1: pissed off and upset, and then yeah, move on and
Speaker 1: go all right, Well, I got to do one of
Speaker 1: the craziest things I've ever done, and I'm just gonna
Speaker 1: take that for what it is, and I'm gonna be
Speaker 1: confident optimistic that, you know, my life will continue to
Speaker 1: have interesting and cool things happen in it, even if
Speaker 1: it is not as a result of a continuation of this.
Speaker 1: That's cool and whatever. I don't know, if you miss her,
Speaker 1: you can watch her stream. I mean, as you probably
Speaker 1: don't do that. It's not healthy. But okay, let's see here.
Speaker 1: All right. This is from Hugh subject line PSA for
Speaker 1: the uncircumcised. Okay, I'm Jewish, so this does not apply
Speaker 1: to me. Hello, ghek, I am uncircumcised, and I found
Speaker 1: out at the age of eighteen that you were supposed
Speaker 1: to clean under the foreskin. My dad is circumcised and
Speaker 1: never taught me how to clean it properly. It'd be
Speaker 1: a little weird. I don't before I continue in this email,
Speaker 1: just so you know, there's I don't like. You only
Speaker 1: have right, You only have your own life experience to
Speaker 1: draw from, and you only have your own perspective. But
Speaker 1: just so you know, it's most people have not had
Speaker 1: a moment where their dad knocks on the door and
Speaker 1: comes into the room and goes, hey, let me show
Speaker 1: you how to clean your penis. So you're you're okay, okay.
Speaker 1: My dad never taught me how to clean up properly,
Speaker 1: so I didn't know you had to. If anyone listening
Speaker 1: is in the same boat, you are supposed to be
Speaker 1: able to pull the foreskin all the way back over
Speaker 1: the head and clean it. I again, I'm I'm I'm sirked.
Speaker 1: So I can't relate to any of this. I remember
Speaker 1: when I first started watching porn, like I thought, I
Speaker 1: thought all penises were like mine. And then when I
Speaker 1: first started watching porn and I saw a guy's dick
Speaker 1: like engulfed by foreskin, I was like, what the fuck
Speaker 1: is wrong with this guy's dick. The crazy thing though,
Speaker 1: that when I did pull it back for the first time,
Speaker 1: I had no smegma and I haven't had any smegma
Speaker 1: since then either. I think my dick learned to clean
Speaker 1: itself because I never cleaned it. Yeah, that's probably what happens. Uh,
Speaker 1: that's it. Love you, I love you too. PS. I
Speaker 1: was the incest guy from your Melbourne show. Okay, I know,
Speaker 1: I know who you are. I know what that is.
Speaker 1: Uh PPPs I think your face should be painted red. Okay,
Speaker 1: all right, let's move on. Let's see here. Oh uh
Speaker 1: this is from Henry. Oh now, let's give that one.
Speaker 1: All right? This was this? This is from Jeremiah. Subject
Speaker 1: line Jeremiah hey Gek. My father was a pastor. We
Speaker 1: grew up in a strict Christian household. We loved God
Speaker 1: and we used to do mission trips to Mexico. While
Speaker 1: I was there, I helped build four houses and one
Speaker 1: cinderblock wall for an orphanage in New Mexico for those
Speaker 1: in need. That's pretty sweet. The first time I went
Speaker 1: on a trip which we would drive thirty six hours
Speaker 1: from Canada to Warez in a van. Holy shit, Hold,
Speaker 1: I gotta let me give you a second map that out.
Speaker 1: You fucking drove from Canada to Mexico. Let me see
Speaker 1: where's where's Warez on the map? I gotta look at that,
Speaker 1: seeodad Warez. Okay, it's like near El Pass. Okay, it's
Speaker 1: like right on the border of Yeah. Damn, that's crazy, man,
Speaker 1: that's crazy. Yeah. See you daed Warez is like right,
Speaker 1: It's like l Paso, right on the border. U. Okay.
Speaker 1: My first time I went on a trip, we drove
Speaker 1: thirty six hours from Canada ware As in a van.
Speaker 1: I was nine years old. My father got cancer when
Speaker 1: I was thirteen and passed away when I was fourteen.
Speaker 1: I turned away from my faith, started partying recklessly and
Speaker 1: experimenting with drugs. I got into a lot of trouble.
Speaker 1: I also began making music beatboxing uncontrollably. That's a very
Speaker 1: funny way to describe that. I became a self proclaimed
Speaker 1: pioneer for beatboxing in Western Canada, performing all over British
Speaker 1: Columbia and Alberta. I learned how to beatbox from a
Speaker 1: Mexican boy named Domingo, son of the manager at the
Speaker 1: orphanage that we built the houses at, when I was
Speaker 1: eleven and he was thirteen. I still perform gigs, but
Speaker 1: not as often. I am thirty two now and still
Speaker 1: dealing with the grief eighteen years later. To anyone struggling
Speaker 1: out there, there was always hope and I love you all.
Speaker 1: Thanks for listening. Thanks for sharing that, Jeremiah. That's really cool, man. Yeah,
Speaker 1: this is one of those I like the I By
Speaker 1: the way, I know people keep saying everyone put your
Speaker 1: phone number in there so you can call the person,
Speaker 1: and I'm like, no, I don't. I prefer these episodes
Speaker 1: to just be me reading emails. But yeah, this is
Speaker 1: one of the If you, Jeremiah, if you can hear this,
Speaker 1: try to call me on one of the days that
Speaker 1: I'm streaming, because I want to. I want to hear
Speaker 1: more about your story. I want to know more about beatboxing.
Speaker 1: This is cool. This is a cool story. Thanks for sharing, Jeremiah.
Speaker 1: This is from Heather. Subject line, I turned my best
Speaker 1: friend into a frog. Okay, hello Ghek. Thank you for
Speaker 1: being one of the best parts of twenty twenty four.
Speaker 1: I got to see your live show in Portland earlier
Speaker 1: this year and had a amazing time. Thanks Heather. In January,
Speaker 1: I went to my first anime convention for my friend's
Speaker 1: thirtieth birthday. I'm so glad I took the time off
Speaker 1: and went, because not only was it a blast, but
Speaker 1: my friend died suddenly five months ago of type one diabetes.
Speaker 1: We had been friends since high school, and nothing really
Speaker 1: prepares you for that news. I teach criminal justice, so
Speaker 1: I'm familiar with death. One of the ongoing gags between
Speaker 1: me and my friend was that I'd always send him
Speaker 1: unhinged funeral ideas sky burials, turning my cremated remains into
Speaker 1: a trackable keychain, having a free themed memorials, not for it,
Speaker 1: having a furbie themed memorial site, etc. Unfortunately, he didn't
Speaker 1: give us many ideas for his funeral beyond Viking funeral,
Speaker 1: which is mostly illegal in the United States aside from
Speaker 1: one city in Colorado. Apparently. Okay, what is a Viking funeral? Well,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna interrupt the zemo real quick in Google Viking funeral. Okay,
Speaker 1: Viking funerals involve the burial or cremation of the deceased,
Speaker 1: along with the sacrifice of items and people. Uh oh okay,
Speaker 1: they put okay. Basically, they just like fucking throw your
Speaker 1: body in a river and throw it on fire. I
Speaker 1: think when his mom offered me and his other close
Speaker 1: friends some of his when my friend's mom offered me
Speaker 1: and his other close friends some of his ashes, I
Speaker 1: knew I had to do something off brand but still respectful.
Speaker 1: After hours of research, I found a website that had
Speaker 1: a frog necklace for cremate for cremaines. So that's what
Speaker 1: part of him was, turned into a jeweled frog with
Speaker 1: a quote from one of our favorite animes. He knew
Speaker 1: I loved frogs and was a mutual weirdo, so he
Speaker 1: wouldn't be the least bit surprised. He was the ultimate nerd.
Speaker 1: He loved anime and cosplaying, played D and D, and
Speaker 1: streamed Persona five and other video games. To honor him,
Speaker 1: I will be taking his froggy remains to anime cons
Speaker 1: this upcoming year, and two concerts that he always dreamed
Speaker 1: of going to, My Chemical Romance and Ato. Death is crazy,
Speaker 1: but life is crazier. Take the time to be weird.
Speaker 1: With your friends. Thanks for anything, Gek. Let me see
Speaker 1: is did she put a picture of the frog? Neflix?
Speaker 1: Oh she did. That's cute. Oh I like that. We
Speaker 1: got a little picture of the frog. That's really cute.
Speaker 1: Oh thanks for showing the story, Heather. This this is
Speaker 1: really really cute. I like this a lot. Yeah. I
Speaker 1: like the idea of unhinged funeral ideas. Yeah, I don't
Speaker 1: know if I have one myself. I'm a little scott
Speaker 1: because you know, all right, so you know how I
Speaker 1: was just went on a whole fucking rant about how
Speaker 1: we die and our body gets put into stuff or whatever.
Speaker 1: Can you just where where do all the hot people live?
Speaker 1: Can you bury me? Like, like, if you could do
Speaker 1: me a favorite, bury me in the ground somewhere in
Speaker 1: in Scandinavia by just bury me in the in the
Speaker 1: dirt somewhere in Scandinavia. Not because I have any ties
Speaker 1: to it, but just because, like I I want to.
Speaker 1: I think, like, Okay, if I get buried in the
Speaker 1: ground in Scandinavia, I'll like my body will like go
Speaker 1: into the food there or whatever, and then I'll be
Speaker 1: reborn to a Scandinavian family and I'll be like pall
Speaker 1: and blonde and have like a chisel jawline and shit.
Speaker 1: So I think that's like the optimal place to be
Speaker 1: buried if you know you want to you want to
Speaker 1: be hot in your next life. So that's that's what
Speaker 1: I want, uh them that you guys to do to me. Well,
Speaker 1: not you guys, I don't whoever's listening to this is
Speaker 1: not gonna be the one in charge of this, but
Speaker 1: I mean, also don't do this, okay whatever. Thank thank
Speaker 1: you for sharing this, Heather. This was good. I liked
Speaker 1: this a lot. Okay, here we go. This is from Cedar,
Speaker 1: subject line gay Luigi fan fiction. Hi, Lyle, my name
Speaker 1: is Cedar, and we've actually met twice after both of
Speaker 1: your Saint Louis live shows kick Ass. The first time
Speaker 1: I met you, you told me I reminded you of Roxis.
Speaker 1: I actually totally remember you. The second time, I had
Speaker 1: green hair and was dressed as punk rock punk rock
Speaker 1: Luigi with my spiky black and white crocs. I actually
Speaker 1: totally one hundred percent do remember you. After that second
Speaker 1: time we met, I told you that I almost texted
Speaker 1: in saying I write gay Luigi fan fiction. So I
Speaker 1: want to expand on that have you ever played Mario
Speaker 1: and Luigi Superstar Saga. I have played Mario and Luigi
Speaker 1: Superstar Saga. I played that one, and I played Brothers
Speaker 1: in Time, where you play as baby Mario baby Luigi
Speaker 1: and Mario and Luigi. I really want to This is
Speaker 1: going to alienate people who don't give a fuck about
Speaker 1: video games, but I don't care. I really want to play.
Speaker 1: There's a new Mario and Luigi game. It's called Mario
Speaker 1: Luigi Brothership. I really want to play it, but it
Speaker 1: got like pretty shitty reviews, and so I don't like.
Speaker 1: Like I'm very particular about my video games, I don't
Speaker 1: want to play a video game. Like video games you
Speaker 1: fucking invest like ten hours of your time into. I
Speaker 1: only want to play a game if it's good. So
Speaker 1: I don't know if anyone's listening to this and they
Speaker 1: played that game and it's good, let me know. Anyway,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna assume you have played it. And in that game,
Speaker 1: there is a character named Prince Peasley, and that is
Speaker 1: who I ship Luigi with in my fan fiction. For
Speaker 1: those of you who are not chronically online, the worship
Speaker 1: is short for a relationship and in the fan fiction, universe.
Speaker 1: When you ship two people, it means that you are
Speaker 1: literarily forcing them to be in a relationship. I know
Speaker 1: this because when I was in eighth grade, I was
Speaker 1: friends with these girls who were really into writing one
Speaker 1: direction fan fiction, and I think they wrote something where
Speaker 1: I was gay with Zaane Malik. Okay, anyway, I don't
Speaker 1: have anything else to say about that. Prince Peasley is
Speaker 1: one of the only characters in the Mario and Luigi
Speaker 1: series to acknowledge Luigi and dismiss Mario, calling him mister
Speaker 1: Red Mustache while referring to Luigi by his actual name.
Speaker 1: He is always flexing trying to impress Luigi, and Luigi
Speaker 1: is blushing the entire time they interact. I think it's
Speaker 1: gay and cute as hell. That's pretty much it. You
Speaker 1: may also remember when we last spoke, I had a
Speaker 1: partner who dressed as a mushroom with me. Okay, I
Speaker 1: don't remember that. I dumped him this year because it
Speaker 1: wasn't treating me well. And now I'm very happy in life.
Speaker 1: Great to hear, I am enjoying my alone time and
Speaker 1: pouring my love into fan fictions that make people smile
Speaker 1: instead of men that make me cry. Well, that's nice.
Speaker 1: That's nice. Okay. PS. I think Luigi x Daisy is
Speaker 1: a bit of a forced ship, meant to give Luigi
Speaker 1: a princess peach because Mario always had her as a
Speaker 1: love interest. I feel like Luigi and Daisy would date,
Speaker 1: break up amicably, and become bisexual besties who hype each
Speaker 1: other up in life. You know, maybe Shagiro Miamoto is that.
Speaker 1: Maybe that's what he thinks too. I don't know. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you can do whatever you want. I'm pretty sure Luigi
Speaker 1: is in the public domain, so you can make him
Speaker 1: gay with Mickey Mouse or whoever you want. Okay, all right,
Speaker 1: let's look here. This is from Diego, subject line trail
Speaker 1: running adventures and pooping complications. Over the past year, I've
Speaker 1: got into trail running, and your podcast has been a
Speaker 1: formidable companion, helping me escape the thought that a serial
Speaker 1: killer or a bear is chasing me. I hope that
Speaker 1: my podcast doesn't help you escape that thought in the
Speaker 1: event that one of those two things actually is happening.
Speaker 1: But anyway, thanks to you, I have an easier time
Speaker 1: enjoying my runs instead of constantly looking over my shoulder
Speaker 1: and being very paranoid. Why I'm concerned that you're always
Speaker 1: paranoid that a bear or a serial killer is chasing
Speaker 1: you every time you're in the woods. But you know,
Speaker 1: teach their own anyway. Trail running has introduced a new challenge.
Speaker 1: I often face a choice between shitting my pants or
Speaker 1: pooping on the trail. My decision is clear, and honestly,
Speaker 1: I've been getting pretty good at it, and I just
Speaker 1: felt you should know. What the fuck? That's the whole email?
Speaker 1: What are you getting good at? What this how? I'm
Speaker 1: so mad that that's the whole email. This email leaves
Speaker 1: it ambiguous as to whether you what's the What is
Speaker 1: the clear decision? Is the clear decision to shit your
Speaker 1: pants or poop in the trail. I'm gonna assume that
Speaker 1: the clear decision is to poop in the trail. And
Speaker 1: I don't know what getting good at it means. I
Speaker 1: guess maybe that means that you've just been good at
Speaker 1: finding the right leaves. Yeah, I get. Here's the thing.
Speaker 1: If you have, like h if you are a carry
Speaker 1: and a backpack, right, and you got some toilet paper
Speaker 1: and some hand sanitizer, you're you're in business. You can
Speaker 1: shit anywhere you want, Okay, well cool, I'm glad that
Speaker 1: I'm glad. I'm glad that you learned new skill. Diego,
Speaker 1: good for you. Okay, this is from Jude, subject line
Speaker 1: the shredded carrot incident. Hi, GEK, call me bug. I'll
Speaker 1: skip the how much I love the podcast paragraph and
Speaker 1: get straight into it the story. You didn't really skip it,
Speaker 1: you kind of if you had taken out this line,
Speaker 1: you would have skipped it. But that's okay. I only
Speaker 1: thought for about two seconds before deciding what to write,
Speaker 1: and my first thought was this, Okay, that's not getting
Speaker 1: straight into it. I'm sorry. I don't know why I'm
Speaker 1: being a dick about this, but I'm just I don't
Speaker 1: know why I'm being a dick about this. I'm alone
Speaker 1: in a room right now reading these emails, and so
Speaker 1: there's no other human beings. It's like when I do
Speaker 1: the phone call podcast, there's another human being on the
Speaker 1: line who I think can give me feedback as to
Speaker 1: whether or not I'm being a dick. But here it's
Speaker 1: just I'm just stream of consciousness. My thought, my stream
Speaker 1: of consciousness, honest to god, thought, is that it bothers
Speaker 1: me that this person like to say saying I'm gonna
Speaker 1: get straight into it is paradoxical because you can't say
Speaker 1: I'm just going to get straight into it, because getting
Speaker 1: straight into it would require the omission of you saying
Speaker 1: let's get straight into it, and then saying that you
Speaker 1: thought about what you were going to get into and
Speaker 1: then writing that is not getting straight into about None
Speaker 1: of this about way, none of this matters. I'm just
Speaker 1: I'm just having a lot of fun doing this. I'm
Speaker 1: just having a lot of fun ranting about how much
Speaker 1: and by the way, what I'm doing right now, I'm
Speaker 1: the fact that I'm taking all this time, the fact
Speaker 1: that this is what caught my attention, the declaration that
Speaker 1: you're going to get straight into it, while not getting
Speaker 1: straight into it, is causing me to also do the
Speaker 1: exact opposite of getting straight into it, because we haven't
Speaker 1: even started reading this email. We've just we haven't even
Speaker 1: gotten pasted whether or not we're going to get straight
Speaker 1: into it. So let's get straight into it. Uh. For
Speaker 1: some background, I'm from the UK, and at the time
Speaker 1: of the incident, I must have been around eight or
Speaker 1: nine years old. So we're on a beautiful island in
Speaker 1: the Maldives, staying at a five star hotel as a family.
Speaker 1: One morning, we head down to the buffet style breakfast
Speaker 1: to start the day. After grabbing an omelet, I noticed
Speaker 1: one of the waiters grating some cheese. Naturally, I walked
Speaker 1: over and asked him to sprinkle some on top of
Speaker 1: my eggs before starting. He said, tell me when to stop.
Speaker 1: After a few seconds, there was enough, so I said
Speaker 1: that's okay, and he smiled but kept grating. So I
Speaker 1: said that's okay again, a bit louder this time, and
Speaker 1: with a big grin on his face, he continued. I
Speaker 1: stood there watching as what felt like an eternity passed
Speaker 1: while the pile on my plate grew higher and higher.
Speaker 1: Finally he stopped. I walked back to my table, feeling
Speaker 1: slightly confused, and as I sat down, my dad and
Speaker 1: brother burst it out, laughing, and they pointed out that
Speaker 1: it wasn't cheese at all, it was a shredded carrot. Embarrassed,
Speaker 1: I tried to eat it, but I couldn't, and to
Speaker 1: this day, I still can't stand shredded carrot. Maybe he
Speaker 1: was a language barrier, or maybe the waiter just really
Speaker 1: wanted me to eat a carrot. Love what you do,
Speaker 1: and I hope to see you next time you do
Speaker 1: a gig in the UK. I'm twenty five, and I
Speaker 1: wonder if you had a similar experience growing up, something
Speaker 1: that embarrassed you as a kid but stayed with you
Speaker 1: into adulthood. Fuck, I'm on the spot now, I'm sure
Speaker 1: I do. Okay, I'm gonna think about that and if
Speaker 1: something comes to me, I'll I'll circle back to this.
Speaker 1: But no, I've never done anything embarrassing as a kid.
Speaker 1: That's not true, all right, Yeah, sure. I remember when
Speaker 1: my parents got divorced and my dad moved out into
Speaker 1: a townhouse. I would spend like we had like a
Speaker 1: custody thing where like I would spend like every other
Speaker 1: weekend and like every Tuesday or Thursday at my dad's
Speaker 1: house or whatever. And one night I'm like, I don't
Speaker 1: know how I am even I'm like ten, and my
Speaker 1: asshole starts to really itch, really bad, and my dad
Speaker 1: has this like carpet on in the townhouse, and for
Speaker 1: some reason, I don't like I don't know why I
Speaker 1: didn't just use toilet paper, but for some reason to
Speaker 1: like scratch my asshole, I just like wiped my ass
Speaker 1: on the carpet, like I like a dog, Like I
Speaker 1: just like got naked and like I was. This wasn't
Speaker 1: even just like in my room. This was like in
Speaker 1: the carpeted hallway of his house. I just put my
Speaker 1: ass on the floor and like dragged it around to
Speaker 1: scratch it. Felt it. By the way. By the way,
Speaker 1: it stays with me, not as much because it was embarrassing,
Speaker 1: but mainly because it was just fucking amazing. I might
Speaker 1: after I'm done recording this, I might go do that
Speaker 1: right now on the on on the floor of of
Speaker 1: this hotel. I might do that right now. I'll pay
Speaker 1: the fine whatever they like. Yeah, I'm whatever the fine is,
Speaker 1: I'll pay it right Yeah. Now that I'm thinking about it,
Speaker 1: I'm like, yeah, that was that felt really good. If
Speaker 1: you're listening to this and you have a carpet, I
Speaker 1: really recommend you wipe your asshole on it. Like I'm
Speaker 1: being one hundred percent serious. You should. If you have
Speaker 1: a if you wherever you like, wherever you are right
Speaker 1: now when you're listening to this, look down. If you
Speaker 1: see a carpet, you should get naked and wipe your
Speaker 1: asshole on it and thank me later. Uh yeah, And
Speaker 1: then my dad, but I usually I just left the
Speaker 1: I didn't like clean it. I just fucking left it.
Speaker 1: So my dad comes out and he sees that there's
Speaker 1: a bunch of just diere shit on his car, and yeah,
Speaker 1: and he yells at me and he's like, what the
Speaker 1: fuck are you doing? So yeah, that was that was embarrassing,
Speaker 1: but mainly it just felt really good. Uh, okay, let's
Speaker 1: keep going, all right. This is from John. Subject line,
Speaker 1: I don't know how to use my laptop for anything
Speaker 1: other than porn. Good day, mister Gek. I hope you
Speaker 1: are enjoying the first week of the new year. The
Speaker 1: problem I have that I would like to discuss today
Speaker 1: is exactly as the subject line portrays. I practically only
Speaker 1: use my laptop exclusively to watch porn on the Internet.
Speaker 1: I do, of course, know how to surf the web
Speaker 1: and use Google and whatnot, but ninety nine percent of
Speaker 1: that activity is conducted from my smartphone. When it comes
Speaker 1: to my laptop, porn Hub, Chatterbait, and the works are
Speaker 1: among my most frequently visited pages. There are plenty of
Speaker 1: things that I would like to learn how to do,
Speaker 1: and there are lots of more productive things that I
Speaker 1: would like to utilize my laptop four aside from watching porn.
Speaker 1: For example, I am an aspiring novelist and it is
Speaker 1: a dream of mine to one day publish a graphic novel.
Speaker 1: I would also like to get into becoming a video
Speaker 1: game streamer, and I have ideas for my own podcast
Speaker 1: that I would like to put into fruition. However, I
Speaker 1: feel as though there's a block preventing me from pursuing
Speaker 1: these endeavors. I am pretty badly technologically inept, and whenever
Speaker 1: I attempt to start a project or teach myself something new,
Speaker 1: I am thwarted by some sort of issue that needs troubleshooting.
Speaker 1: I become easily frustrated in trying to figure it out.
Speaker 1: I give up, and I don't touch the project again
Speaker 1: for a long period of time until it randomly pops
Speaker 1: back into my head and I reattempt and review the
Speaker 1: project process. Now, this is coming from like a big
Speaker 1: This guy says he's a big porn guy. And you
Speaker 1: know what's funny is like if I put the effort,
Speaker 1: like like if you're a porn person, you know, like
Speaker 1: if you know the effort that we're all familiar with
Speaker 1: the effort that one may put in to find the
Speaker 1: name of a person in a porn video, like you're
Speaker 1: on You're on like the fourth fucking page of Google,
Speaker 1: trying to find this person's name, trying to find more
Speaker 1: videos with them, and like if there's a video that
Speaker 1: you want to download, you know, you know, you're downloading
Speaker 1: fucking you're on like mega upload whatever the fuck dot com.
Speaker 1: Like you're your your your sexual your lust is propelling
Speaker 1: you to get this detective work done. So I'm gonna
Speaker 1: assume you're familiar with with that, John, I'm gonna assume
Speaker 1: you have that, so I maybe maybe consider I don't
Speaker 1: know how you do this, but maybe just consider figuring
Speaker 1: out how to like harness that energy and push it
Speaker 1: towards figuring out how to write a novel, you know
Speaker 1: what I mean. M So that's what That's what I
Speaker 1: would say, John, That's what I would say is take
Speaker 1: take the energy. Like notice, notice when you're able to
Speaker 1: get things done, uh, when they involve you being able
Speaker 1: to find find the porn videos you want to find,
Speaker 1: and figure out how to transmute that energy into into
Speaker 1: not jerking off stuff. All right, all right, this is
Speaker 1: from Onyx subject line I am a depressed drag queen.
Speaker 1: Hey GEK, longtime listener and avid fan. I'll just get
Speaker 1: down to it. Okay, I'm not gonna go back. I'm
Speaker 1: not gonna go on this rant again, but about getting
Speaker 1: straight into it. Okay, all right. Sorry, I'm a horrible writer,
Speaker 1: so bear with me here. Like the title said, as
Speaker 1: I'm a professional drag queen with ten years of experience.
Speaker 1: I've been fortunate enough to be quite a successful drag
Speaker 1: queen at that I performed all over the country and
Speaker 1: was on a drag competition television show. Oh very cool.
Speaker 1: I unfortunately fell victim to the gods of reality TV
Speaker 1: and did not place very well on the show. This
Speaker 1: crushed me. I know I'm an amazing artist and I
Speaker 1: am fortunate enough to make a decent living doing it,
Speaker 1: but this does not change the fact that this show
Speaker 1: mentally destroyed me. It's hard because the show has given
Speaker 1: me a platform, but it also did me dirty in
Speaker 1: many ways. Long story shirt, long story short. It became
Speaker 1: apparent that I was casted as an early out, and
Speaker 1: well I was. I spent thirteen thousand dollars on costumes
Speaker 1: that never aired. I can't emotionally move past this show.
Speaker 1: I feel like I fucked up my big break. I
Speaker 1: know thousands of drag artists that would kill to have
Speaker 1: this opportunity, but I can't move on from what it
Speaker 1: has done to me mentally. Oh my god, on it.
Speaker 1: I have so much to say about this, you know,
Speaker 1: first of all, just I mean, look, you're the fact
Speaker 1: that you're doing drag for a living. I'm going to
Speaker 1: assume that you have some kind of social media presence,
Speaker 1: right the world we live in, just so, just so people,
Speaker 1: it's so crazy to me that people haven't like fully,
Speaker 1: fully fully caught on and understood just how little gatekeepers
Speaker 1: there are in the like arts entertainment industries. Right, so, like,
Speaker 1: you know, it used to be like whatever in the
Speaker 1: fucking like nineties or eighties or whatever. It's like there's
Speaker 1: a fucking guy at a desk and the guide decides
Speaker 1: whether or not you have a career. Right, That's how
Speaker 1: it used to be. But now we have the Internet
Speaker 1: and you can take those like, dude, those fucking you
Speaker 1: spent thirteen thousand dollars on costumes that never aired, fucking
Speaker 1: make your own videos with the costumes, like fuck this
Speaker 1: TV show? Who cares you have the costumes. Watn't you
Speaker 1: make your own fucking tiktoks and Instagram reels and then
Speaker 1: YouTube videos with this shit? I hate TV, also saying
Speaker 1: I can't emotionally move past this. I feel like I
Speaker 1: fucked up my big break. No, you didn't fuck up
Speaker 1: your big break. You're big. They're also sorry. I'm I'm um,
Speaker 1: I'm stuttering, but uh listen, Onyx. Just keep doing the work.
Speaker 1: Clearly you enjoy doing it. Clearly you probably have. I
Speaker 1: don't you know. I don't have a lot of information
Speaker 1: about who you are, how you make your living, but
Speaker 1: I'm gonna assume that you have a social media presence.
Speaker 1: If you are are making a decent living doing this,
Speaker 1: just keep doing the work. Literally, just keep fucking doing
Speaker 1: your your stuff and keep fucking making videos of it
Speaker 1: and putting it on the internet. And you're good. Also,
Speaker 1: if you're doing it for a living like you, you
Speaker 1: don't have, there is no what do you mean, big break?
Speaker 1: You've broke. If you're doing something that you really like
Speaker 1: doing and you're doing it for a living and you're
Speaker 1: getting to do it, you've broke. You know you've broke.
Speaker 1: So I would I would move on from this stupid
Speaker 1: TV show would never if I I would just never
Speaker 1: think about it again and I would go, well, that
Speaker 1: was kind of dumb, and then just keep doing your
Speaker 1: fucking drag. Man, Yeah, I think it. I think it's
Speaker 1: super silly to let this this a TV show get
Speaker 1: to you, So just keep doing the work. I remember
Speaker 1: when I was eighteen years old, there was a video
Speaker 1: of me doing stand up comedy that like went to
Speaker 1: the front page of Reddit, and like I got like
Speaker 1: this like fucking manager person reached out to me and
Speaker 1: I was having a conversation with him, and I was like,
Speaker 1: oh shit, this is like my big break. Like I'm
Speaker 1: gonna be like a young, hot shot stand up comedian.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna get to like get on Comedy Central and
Speaker 1: do all this stuff. And then nothing really happened with it,
Speaker 1: and I went to college, and like the first like
Speaker 1: about a year, the kind of the year following my
Speaker 1: like viral stand up video, I felt really very similarly.
Speaker 1: I was like, oh man, I fucked up my big break.
Speaker 1: I was like so genuine I was so regretful that
Speaker 1: I didn't capitalize on this opportunity that I had with
Speaker 1: this stand up video going viral, and you know. Cut
Speaker 1: to four years later, I just keep making stuff and
Speaker 1: I'm fucking around and I get in my gecko suit
Speaker 1: and all of a sudden, I'm on the front page
Speaker 1: of Reddit again. And I learned. I learned from that
Speaker 1: experience and I capitalized on it. And now now I'm
Speaker 1: reading your email, and you know, I don't know, and honestly,
Speaker 1: I don't know. I guess while I'm talking about myself.
Speaker 1: It's like this whole like I think one of the
Speaker 1: things I've learned, and I think I've talked about this
Speaker 1: on the show before, but one of the things I've
Speaker 1: learned over the course of like my little gecko career
Speaker 1: and kind of life career in general, is that, like,
Speaker 1: you know, if as long as you're able to make
Speaker 1: a living, as you're telling me that you're doing, and
Speaker 1: as I've been lucky enough to do, as long as
Speaker 1: you're making a living, like once you once you start
Speaker 1: making enough money that like you can pay your rent
Speaker 1: and you know, eat food and not have to worry about,
Speaker 1: you know, getting a burrito at Chipotle, and you know,
Speaker 1: your friends invite you to go see a movie, you
Speaker 1: go see a movie. As long as you have it,
Speaker 1: like it's just enough money. You just fucking live life.
Speaker 1: Everything beyond that is like, who gives a shit? Like
Speaker 1: you fucked up your big break to do what you know,
Speaker 1: If you make enough money and you're doing what you
Speaker 1: love and you're enjoying the actual creative work that you're
Speaker 1: doing and you have enough of people who can appreciate it,
Speaker 1: that it's satis fighting to you. That's it. You've broke.
Speaker 1: Just enjoy fucking life and enjoy doing your work. Just
Speaker 1: get obsessed with your work. You know, who fuck I
Speaker 1: gives a shit about this TV show? You know, so
Speaker 1: keep going onyx on Dix. Maybe let me google maybe
Speaker 1: google this, let me google this. Maybe this is your
Speaker 1: drag thing. Oh yeah it is. There we go, Oh,
Speaker 1: there we go. Pretty cool? Pretty cool. Oh I don't
Speaker 1: know if you didn't want to be doxed, but pretty cool,
Speaker 1: pretty cool. You know, I'm I'm gonna you know what,
Speaker 1: you're a You're a uh, you're an Internet personality. You like,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna, i'll, i'll I think maybe some people will,
Speaker 1: maybe some people will want to follow your ship. So yeah,
Speaker 1: onyx on Dix, go follow onyx on Dix. Okay, all right, uh,
Speaker 1: let's see how much all R. Yeah, let's keep going.
Speaker 1: Let's keep taking a few more emails, subject line I'm
Speaker 1: scared to fuck things up? Goodmorrow? GEK, what does that mean? Goodmorrow?
Speaker 1: I'm googling that. Hold on all right, interrupting me email
Speaker 1: to google? What goodmorrow means? Does that mean good tomorrow?
Speaker 1: Hold on goodmorrow? Uh? Ifmorrow means what is good? Okaymorrow
Speaker 1: is the current day? Oh? Holy shit? Whoa do you
Speaker 1: guys know? Whoa? Okay, whoa? This is crazy? All right?
Speaker 1: Somorrow means the current day, so tomorrow is the next day.
Speaker 1: And then get this ship. I've never seen this word
Speaker 1: in my life. Do you guys know that? Overmorrow is
Speaker 1: the day after the next day? So overmorrow is tomorrow
Speaker 1: times two? Is that a real I've never heard that
Speaker 1: in my life. Yeah, over holy shit. Overmorrow is an
Speaker 1: archaic word that means the day after tomorrow, and it
Speaker 1: is not commonly used in modern English. Folks. Okay, okay.
Speaker 1: Listeners of the Therapy Geico podcast, we are bringing back overmorrow.
Speaker 1: I challenge you to you to just start using the
Speaker 1: word anytime you want to say, like if, like, okay,
Speaker 1: what today is? Where I am and recording this it's Friday,
Speaker 1: and this episode will come out overmorrow, so on Sunday.
Speaker 1: But instead of saying Sunday, I'm gonna just say overmorrow. Okay.
Speaker 1: Everyone tried to all right, we're gonna, We're gonna all right,
Speaker 1: Therapy Gecko podcast listener petition to bring back Overmorrow. All
Speaker 1: right anyway, Goodmorrow, gak you can call me Fenton. Recently,
Speaker 1: I started talking to a girl again who I had
Speaker 1: a talking stage with back in June. We ended up
Speaker 1: stopping talking because she said I smoked weed too much,
Speaker 1: and at the time I was basically like, ah, well,
Speaker 1: me a real bad man and I'm gonna keep blazing
Speaker 1: the ganja. Okay. Over that summer I did a lot
Speaker 1: of acid. I'm pretty sure it wasn't acid and was
Speaker 1: in fact some other chemical, but oh well, I survived. Okay.
Speaker 1: What's the thing? This acid made me realize that this
Speaker 1: girl is really special because she's the only girl I
Speaker 1: know who likes the band Madness and music taste is
Speaker 1: really important to me. How old is it, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: are you sixteen? Anyway? I cut down on weed and
Speaker 1: nick and alcohol because of her, and started working out
Speaker 1: pretty okay, pretty good, pretty good, Henry. Pretty good. Cut
Speaker 1: to the start of December, and we catch each other's
Speaker 1: eye in the hallway of my college. All right, you're
Speaker 1: like twenty like or like nineteen like two or three times.
Speaker 1: We have been talking every day since the seventeenth of November,
Speaker 1: and I'm worried that this whole thing is built on
Speaker 1: a lie because the only reason I improved myself was
Speaker 1: because of acid. Thank you, ghak, I love you and
Speaker 1: all that you do. Okay, let me I need to
Speaker 1: I need to understand how this person's brain works before
Speaker 1: I continue responding to this email. Okay, I'm worried. Okay,
Speaker 1: So the acid made you realize that the girl was Okay, Okay,
Speaker 1: you say that the acid. Okay, you say the only
Speaker 1: reason you started improving yourself was because of acid. But
Speaker 1: you're saying the acid made you realize the girl is special,
Speaker 1: and so you started improving yourself to be with this girl,
Speaker 1: and the whole thing is built on a lie. I
Speaker 1: I listen, Henry, I hate everything you wrote in this email,
Speaker 1: no offense, but I'm gonna just say this to you.
Speaker 1: Just keep improving, bro, improve yourself because it's good. Just
Speaker 1: like I'm assuming that cutting down on weed and nicotine
Speaker 1: and alcohol and working out has made you feel good
Speaker 1: and that you're enjoying it. So Henry, listen, don't don't
Speaker 1: be a why. And also you didn't really include in
Speaker 1: this email why you're afraid to fuck things up, Henry.
Speaker 1: I want to make things really simple for you. Take
Speaker 1: stock of your life of what is improving it, what
Speaker 1: you wish was different. Things you want to start doing,
Speaker 1: things you want to stop doing. And it sounds like
Speaker 1: you've done this already because you're cutting down on drugs
Speaker 1: and you're working out and you're improving, and that's great.
Speaker 1: And then when it comes to this girl, right, if
Speaker 1: you like her, you know, fucking do things for her
Speaker 1: that you think will make your presence and her life
Speaker 1: better for her. Okay, continue to take stock of whether
Speaker 1: or not this girl's presence in your life is good
Speaker 1: for you, and keep it fucking simple. Those three things
Speaker 1: I think I said three things. Yeah, keep stock of
Speaker 1: the things you want to do to improve your life
Speaker 1: and do them. You know, make sure that you're being
Speaker 1: valuable to this woman's life if you really like her,
Speaker 1: and make sure that this woman is valuable to your
Speaker 1: life and that you're not just doing things because you
Speaker 1: fucking don't want to, you know, be alone and jack
Speaker 1: off like that, like the guy with the laptop thing,
Speaker 1: which isn't It's not that bad jerking off, It's fun. Sorry,
Speaker 1: all right? Uh, let's take one. Let's take one more email.
Speaker 1: Let's read another email somewhere, all right. This is from Jesse,
Speaker 1: subject line I am in love with my step aunt. Hello, Geko.
Speaker 1: My name is Jesse, and I live in the great
Speaker 1: state known as Miami, Florida. About five years ago, my
Speaker 1: then single mother met a man, her future husband, in
Speaker 1: a bar. This man is now my stepfather. I've met
Speaker 1: his side of the family quite a few times, and
Speaker 1: I feel fairly comfortable with them. My stepdad has a
Speaker 1: sister who is eighteen as am I. At first I
Speaker 1: didn't feel much, but as the years have gone on,
Speaker 1: I've developed a deep admiration and attraction to her as
Speaker 1: a person. We're basically just friends that happened to have
Speaker 1: these labels laid upon us. I truly have no idea
Speaker 1: if she feels the same way or not. I'm telling
Speaker 1: her how I feel could go really well or really badly.
Speaker 1: If she was simply just a friend that I had,
Speaker 1: I probably would have confessed my feelings to her by now,
Speaker 1: but since she's technically my step aunt, I've refused the
Speaker 1: idea because of how badly the consequences could be among
Speaker 1: our families. I don't think my attraction to her is
Speaker 1: weird or bad because we're not biologically related at all.
Speaker 1: But I've tried time and time again to forget it.
Speaker 1: But I genuinely feel love for her, and I've grown
Speaker 1: to accept it. This is a lot. I don't expect
Speaker 1: a clear cut solution to my problem, but I thought
Speaker 1: it'd be nice to hear your solutions on, to hear
Speaker 1: your thoughts on my situation. Love your gecko. Yeah, you
Speaker 1: know this is interesting. You know actually I can really tell, Jesse,
Speaker 1: by the way that you wrote this email that you
Speaker 1: have a pretty mature thought process around this. I think
Speaker 1: you've really thought about it. Yeah, I don't think your
Speaker 1: attraction to her is weird or bad because you're not
Speaker 1: biologically related. And I mean, shit, I don't know. You
Speaker 1: guys aren't bodling. You guys aren't really bought. Is it
Speaker 1: is it weird if they start dating? I don't is
Speaker 1: it is it weird if they start dating? Maybe it's
Speaker 1: weird if they start dating, just because like if you're
Speaker 1: if your stepdad and your mom break up, then yeah,
Speaker 1: but uh, your step how old your stepdad that he
Speaker 1: has a eighteen year old sister and he's dating your mom.
Speaker 1: I'm very I am very curious how old your mom
Speaker 1: and how old your stepdad is. But anyway you feel
Speaker 1: like it'll complicate the families, I mean, I you know what,
Speaker 1: look whatever, I here's the thing. I don't think it's
Speaker 1: that weird if you tell this girl how you feel.
Speaker 1: I really don't really, I don't think it's that weird.
Speaker 1: And is it going to complicate things with the family.
Speaker 1: Not really. You seem like a mature person, Jesse, just
Speaker 1: but I don't know. Just the way you wrote this email,
Speaker 1: I think, uh, you know, saying I feel love for her,
Speaker 1: ab I've grown to accept it. I think what would
Speaker 1: make I think if you really, like your gut is
Speaker 1: telling you to like have a conversation with this girl
Speaker 1: about it not necessary, not necessarily be like, I'm in
Speaker 1: love with you and we need to you know, I
Speaker 1: know that it's weird that you're my step on and
Speaker 1: whatever the fuck, but like let's get married. Just you know,
Speaker 1: I think something. I think your gut seems like it's
Speaker 1: telling you to just bring it out into the open
Speaker 1: and have a conversation with it. And what would make
Speaker 1: it weird is if you were weird about it and
Speaker 1: you didn't accept whatever the results of that conversation were.
Speaker 1: But I don't. I'm not getting that vibe from you.
Speaker 1: So you know, look, if I were you and you
Speaker 1: really kind of had this stirring in your gut and
Speaker 1: you wanted to get it out in the open, I wouldn't.
Speaker 1: I don't think it would be the worst thing in
Speaker 1: the world to have a conversation with this girl and
Speaker 1: bring your admiration and attraction to her in the open
Speaker 1: and see how it's received and if it's not a
Speaker 1: mutual thing, or if it just proves to be too
Speaker 1: complicated for you. Guys, you know you can accept that outcome,
Speaker 1: and I think think that, I think you'll be okay. Yeah, okay.
Speaker 1: I finally know who they're making all the stepsister porn
Speaker 1: for it's it's several of the people who have emailed
Speaker 1: in today are the reason why they make so much
Speaker 1: so much stepsister porn. I don't know what's the chat say,
Speaker 1: Chat says he should keep this to himself. Uh, this
Speaker 1: Chat says it'll complicate it. Okay, Chat does not agree
Speaker 1: with me, but whatever, I don't know, give it a shot.
Speaker 1: Life life is short. Uh, life is short. Tell your
Speaker 1: step on that you love her. All right. That's it.
Speaker 1: That's the podcast that was gak mail. I hope you
Speaker 1: guys enjoyed it. I hope that you had a good time.
Speaker 1: I had a good time. I enjoyed taking these emails.
Speaker 1: We're at the end of the here's okay, you know
Speaker 1: what the thing is. We're at the end of this episode.
Speaker 1: So if you were I'm gonna do this is the
Speaker 1: end period. Okay, So everything I say after this, I'm
Speaker 1: normally when I'm doing this podcast, I'm like, Okay, I
Speaker 1: want it to like be of good quality. I want
Speaker 1: to make sure that the things that I'm saying are
Speaker 1: like worth I want to make sure that this podcast
Speaker 1: is worth listening to. But at this point, it's the end.
Speaker 1: You know, we've already done like at least an hour
Speaker 1: of a podcast that I've like, for the past hour
Speaker 1: of podcasting, I've had a thing in my brain that's
Speaker 1: been like, Okay, let me make sure that this is
Speaker 1: listened to a bull. But now that we've gotten an
Speaker 1: hour of what I've considered listened to a bull, I'm
Speaker 1: throwing all out the window. This part of the podcast
Speaker 1: can just be shit. This can just be me ranting
Speaker 1: in circles. And I don't feel bad because we already
Speaker 1: did an hour of competent I guess, in my opinion,
Speaker 1: competent podcasting. So now I'm just gonna rant. And if
Speaker 1: you and you don't have to be here, you can
Speaker 1: move on to the next episode or go to the
Speaker 1: previous episode. If this isn't working for you, if you're
Speaker 1: just like, oh, this is just literally just ranting with
Speaker 1: the zero substance. But I'm just challenging. I'm genuinely just
Speaker 1: challenging myself right now. It's not stop talking for as
Speaker 1: long as I can. I for no reason, there's no
Speaker 1: reason for me to be doing this, Okay, send an
Speaker 1: email to therapy Gecko mail at gmail dot com. That's
Speaker 1: therapy Gecko mail at gmail dot com. Uh, and you
Speaker 1: can follow me on Twitch dot tv slash Lyle forever.
Speaker 1: But you can follow me on Instagram at Lyle the
Speaker 1: number four ever if you wanna, you know, keep up
Speaker 1: to date. On when I'm streaming and when you can
Speaker 1: call in. What else I just want? I don't. I'm
Speaker 1: I drank. I drank an energy drink before this. I
Speaker 1: wish I typically tend to do, so I guess I'll
Speaker 1: just keep ranting for a little bit, or I won't.
Speaker 1: Like I said, I feel like I delivered the I
Speaker 1: delivered the hour of competent podcasting that I set out
Speaker 1: to deliver, and the rest can just be dog shit
Speaker 1: because it's all extra. It's just bonus. It's literally this
Speaker 1: is honestly. I don't if you're still listening at this point,
Speaker 1: right now, this is the end, Okay, if you're still
Speaker 1: listening at this point, I I don't really know why.
Speaker 1: There's not gonna be I'm not gonna say anything else
Speaker 1: of substance. From the very moment until the end of
Speaker 1: the episode, there will be nothing else of substance. There's
Speaker 1: just gonna be me ranting and seeing how much longer
Speaker 1: I can keep talking for. And I'm feeling a little tired.
Speaker 1: So it's I think I think I'm gonna stop talking.
Speaker 1: I think I'm gonna stop talking in a second. But
Speaker 1: before I stop talking, I'm gonna talk a little bit
Speaker 1: more like I'm doing right now, and I think that
Speaker 1: now that I've now that I don't really want to
Speaker 1: keep talking, I'm gonna stop talking and end the episode
Speaker 1: right now. So thanks for listening, and praise our Lord
Speaker 1: and savior Jesus Christ. Okay, thank you again, goes on
Speaker 1: the line, taking your phone calls every nine. Everything again
Speaker 1: goes and I was teaching you loud and mean to
Speaker 1: be line. But he's not really an expert.