Speaker 1: Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of I Heart Radio.
Speaker 1: Good Morning, This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast.
Speaker 1: Today's tip is to ask for what you want because
Speaker 1: you often won't get what you don't ask for. I mean,
Speaker 1: you might, but the odds are lower than if you
Speaker 1: say what is on your mind. Today's tip comes from
Speaker 1: a discussion on the Patreon page for my other podcast,
Speaker 1: Best of Both Worlds. My co host Sarah and I
Speaker 1: ask people about the best career advice they've gotten. A
Speaker 1: listener mentioned realizing that she likely wouldn't get what she
Speaker 1: didn't ask for, so if she truly wanted something, she
Speaker 1: needed to ask. I think this is great advice. So
Speaker 1: often we assume that people know what we want, or
Speaker 1: that they should know what we want. Whether it's your
Speaker 1: boss knowing that you want to be staffed on a
Speaker 1: particular project or your spouse knowing that you want flowers
Speaker 1: for your anniversary, people often believe their hopes are apparent
Speaker 1: to everyone around them. What's funny is that this fallacy
Speaker 1: becomes immediately apparent when you reverse the situation. Do you
Speaker 1: know exactly what your spouse wants? What your boss wants?
Speaker 1: Has every gift you've given, or every idea you've offered
Speaker 1: up been the equivalent of a home run. No how interesting,
Speaker 1: we all live in our own little worlds, and consequently,
Speaker 1: what is obvious to us isn't to everyone else, no
Speaker 1: matter how much we believe it should be. People often
Speaker 1: do not know what you want. They don't know even
Speaker 1: if they really love you, or respect you or know
Speaker 1: you very well. You can spend your time lamenting this
Speaker 1: and ruminating that if perhaps they loved or respected you more,
Speaker 1: they would know. But you know what else you could
Speaker 1: do at that time? State what you want explicitly so
Speaker 1: you have a better shot at getting it. So, if
Speaker 1: there is something you want at work, tell your boss
Speaker 1: about it. Ask for it. Whether that's a promotion, the
Speaker 1: opportunity to be staffed on a particular project, a chance
Speaker 1: to present at your team meeting, direct reports, an offset
Speaker 1: schedule that involves coming in early and leaving early, or
Speaker 1: anything else. No one can read your mind, So state
Speaker 1: what you want and need. You may not get everything
Speaker 1: you ask for, but you're a lot more likely to
Speaker 1: get what you want if you do ask for it.
Speaker 1: Then if you just wait around for the career fairy
Speaker 1: to drop it into your lap. The wisdom of asking
Speaker 1: for what you want is true at home. To let
Speaker 1: your family members know what you want, whether that's for
Speaker 1: them to say thank you before they say anything else
Speaker 1: about dinner, or to give you a handwritten note on
Speaker 1: your birthday, or to give you a handwritten note on
Speaker 1: your birthday, or to put their plates in the dishwasher
Speaker 1: after dinner. Should the dishwasher thing be obvious, probably, but
Speaker 1: so it goes. Asking makes it happen. Seething silently might not.
Speaker 1: My daughter recently turned ten, and in addition to asking
Speaker 1: for certain things, she told me how she wanted her
Speaker 1: presence to be wrapped. Namely, she knew we had a
Speaker 1: certain mix of wrapping paper rolls in the upstairs closet,
Speaker 1: and she wanted her presence wrapped in the paper with stars.
Speaker 1: This was a very easy request to fulfill. I was
Speaker 1: going to wrap her presence in something, and I would
Speaker 1: much rather do what she wants then find out later
Speaker 1: that she had a desire and was disappointed. She two,
Speaker 1: I didn't want to be disappointed, since she told me
Speaker 1: what she wanted, I didn't have to guess. What a
Speaker 1: smart kid, because when you let people know what you want,
Speaker 1: you are a lot more likely to get it. Is
Speaker 1: there anything you are assuming others know that you want,
Speaker 1: consider whether it would be wise to ask for it.
Speaker 1: Most likely, the worst that could happen is that the
Speaker 1: other person will say no, And the best that could
Speaker 1: happen is that you will actually get what you want.
Speaker 1: On the whole, those sound like pretty good odds. In
Speaker 1: the meantime, This is Laura. Thanks for listening, and here's
Speaker 1: to making the most of our time. Hey, everybody, I'd
Speaker 1: love to hear from you. You can send me your tips,
Speaker 1: your questions, or anything else. Just connect with me on Twitter, Facebook,
Speaker 1: and Instagram at Before Breakfast pod that's B the number four,
Speaker 1: then Breakfast p o D. You can also shoot me
Speaker 1: an email at Before Breakfast podcast at i heeart media
Speaker 1: dot com that Before Breakfast is spelled out with all
Speaker 1: the letters. Thanks so much, I look forward to staying
Speaker 1: in touch. Before Breakfast is a production of I Heart Radio.
Speaker 1: For more podcasts from my heart Radio, visit the i
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Speaker 1: your favorite shows. Yeah mhm