WEBVTT - What a Dad Wants

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<v Speaker 1>This is the most dramatic podcast ever and iHeartRadio podcast.

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<v Speaker 2>Chris Harrison coming to you from the home office in Austin, Texas.

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<v Speaker 2>Happy Father's Day week, everybody. To those who are celebrating,

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<v Speaker 2>I wish you happy Father's Day. These days and these

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<v Speaker 2>weeks are always interesting. I'm doing this solo today and

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<v Speaker 2>we're gonna have several kind of podcasts this week. But

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<v Speaker 2>you know, Mother's Day, Father's Day. First of all, you know,

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<v Speaker 2>being married to someone who Lauren, whose dad passed away

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<v Speaker 2>when she was younger, I have a whole new respect

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<v Speaker 2>for these days and these weeks, of those who celebrate

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<v Speaker 2>and those who get to enjoy it, and then those

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<v Speaker 2>who don't, and then those who it can be a

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<v Speaker 2>rough week for For me. My dad is alive and well,

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<v Speaker 2>thank God, I've been blessed with having an amazing father.

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<v Speaker 2>He lives down in South Texas and we still have

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<v Speaker 2>an amazing relationship with my brother. I have an older brother,

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<v Speaker 2>by the way, And so you know, Father's Day is

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<v Speaker 2>always an interesting week because I feel like Mother's Day

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<v Speaker 2>and Father's Day are so different the way we look

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<v Speaker 2>at them. And maybe that's just my world. I don't know,

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<v Speaker 2>but Mother's Day, we really and this is out of

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<v Speaker 2>all due respect and love, we should we really stop.

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<v Speaker 2>And it's really kind of this this massive thing where

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<v Speaker 2>we really want to dive in and make moms feel great.

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<v Speaker 2>And there's there's you know, the brunches and the things,

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<v Speaker 2>and it's it's Mother's Day. And then there's kind of like, oh, yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>Father's Day. It's in June, and it's kind of like,

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<v Speaker 2>oh crap, what do we do? So I'm here to

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<v Speaker 2>help you with the oh crap, what do we do

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<v Speaker 2>with Father's Day? Because it is kind of that weird

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<v Speaker 2>day where it's like, well, is dad just going to

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<v Speaker 2>go out and do yard work again? Is it just

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<v Speaker 2>you know, you end up barbecuing. This is the best story.

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<v Speaker 2>When I was when my kids were young, My daughter Taylor,

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<v Speaker 2>who's now twenty, she was in ballet class and in

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<v Speaker 2>a ballet studio, a dance studio, whatever their dance recital

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<v Speaker 2>was on Father's Day. It was Sunday of Father's Day

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<v Speaker 2>that all these dads had to go sit in an

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<v Speaker 2>auditorium and watch three hours of what we will loosely

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<v Speaker 2>call ballet. And I asked the teacher, the instructor one

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<v Speaker 2>time I said, why do you do this on Father's Day?

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<v Speaker 2>And she's said, well, I thought this would be such

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<v Speaker 2>a treat for the dads, and I said, yeah, there's

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<v Speaker 2>nothing more than dads want to do. Then get up

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<v Speaker 2>early on Father's Day and go sit and watch your

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<v Speaker 2>daughter dance and again I use that term loosely, for

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<v Speaker 2>like four minutes, and then watch a thousand other kids

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<v Speaker 2>pick their nose on stage. That is our dream. That's

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<v Speaker 2>exactly what we want to do. Talk about the things

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<v Speaker 2>you would never do on Mother's Day. That's it because

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<v Speaker 2>they know that's not it, and so hold the dance

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<v Speaker 2>recital on another day. That's not where dads want to

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<v Speaker 2>go sit in a cold auditorium and pretend that you know,

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<v Speaker 2>they're watching their neighbor's daughter dance. But we've evolved from that.

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<v Speaker 2>We've gotten older, and here's what it comes down to.

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<v Speaker 2>Number One, time if I can get time with my kids,

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<v Speaker 2>If I get a chance to see my kids. The

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<v Speaker 2>older they get, the trickier that gets because they start

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<v Speaker 2>living in different places. Luckily, my son has graduated, he

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<v Speaker 2>lives closer to me now that my daughter up and

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<v Speaker 2>fort wereth So it gets harder and harder to spend

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<v Speaker 2>time together. But number one time If I get to

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<v Speaker 2>see the kids this week, and it doesn't even have

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<v Speaker 2>to be on Sunday, just at any point in time.

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<v Speaker 2>If we can be together and I can get a

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<v Speaker 2>big hug and sit down and have a meal in

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<v Speaker 2>a conversation, that's gold. That is amazing. The older I get,

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<v Speaker 2>I just want time and to be present, and they're lives.

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<v Speaker 2>That's it. The other thing is if you're not around

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<v Speaker 2>your dad, just you don't have to overthink this. You know,

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<v Speaker 2>you don't have to send them steaks or anything else.

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<v Speaker 2>And by the way, those are great things. Go to

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<v Speaker 2>those steak places. There's like, I'm not sponsored by any

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<v Speaker 2>of these. Omaha steaks used to be a big thing.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't even know if they exist anymore. But like

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<v Speaker 2>cow Kow is a good one. You know, go get

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<v Speaker 2>your dad like some great steaks and great lamb chops,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, some some filelets like really, you know, get

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<v Speaker 2>him dialed in. Send those to them. By the way,

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<v Speaker 2>if he eats meat. Golf balls. This is the funny thing.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't care how rich you are, how poor you are,

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<v Speaker 2>if you play golf, no one's ever mad at getting

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<v Speaker 2>golf balls and get him some nice ones, you know,

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<v Speaker 2>go out and you know, get some titleist pro v

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<v Speaker 2>ones and if you really want to go the extra mile,

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<v Speaker 2>you can order them ahead of time and you can

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<v Speaker 2>get them, you know, like personalized. You can put like Dad,

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<v Speaker 2>or you could get them like say I was born

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<v Speaker 2>in nineteen seventy one. All the numbers can be seventy one,

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<v Speaker 2>so you can personalize them as well, so you know,

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<v Speaker 2>you can think a little bit. But I digress. The

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<v Speaker 2>point of this is if you can't think of a gift,

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<v Speaker 2>or you just don't have the time or the money, whatever,

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<v Speaker 2>just do something personal. I think the greatest thing that

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<v Speaker 2>I could ever get from my kids is a is

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<v Speaker 2>a letter for them to sit down and write me

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<v Speaker 2>a card. Write me a letter and not just like

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<v Speaker 2>a silly snoopy Father's Day card and it says it

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<v Speaker 2>and they go, oh love you like something where you've

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<v Speaker 2>taken the time and you have been thoughtful. I think

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<v Speaker 2>any gift for a dad that's thoughtful, something that means

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<v Speaker 2>something to you, A picture from when you were kids

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<v Speaker 2>and have it framed so he can put it in

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<v Speaker 2>his closet or you know, in his office. Something that

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<v Speaker 2>truly means something to you, guys. And it's hard to

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<v Speaker 2>come up with ideas for you because you know, who

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<v Speaker 2>knows what connects you. Maybe it's fly fishing, maybe it's

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<v Speaker 2>you like flying or or parish whatever, golf, Get something meaningful,

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<v Speaker 2>maybe you went to Saint Andrews together and played golf,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, buy something special or maybe print a picture

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<v Speaker 2>from that. But something very personal is really what your

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<v Speaker 2>dads want, you know. They say being a parent is

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<v Speaker 2>a thankless task. And yes, as you guys get older,

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<v Speaker 2>as kids get older, sometimes we have that realization, especially

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<v Speaker 2>when we become parents. You call your parents, you call

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<v Speaker 2>your mom and dad, you say, wow, I was a

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<v Speaker 2>real pain in the butt. Thank you for being there,

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<v Speaker 2>thank you for loving me. But as your kids are,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, are growing up, it's hard for them to

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<v Speaker 2>have perspective. Why would they write you don't know what

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<v Speaker 2>you don't know? So trying to get your kids to

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<v Speaker 2>take a moment, write a letter, you know, really write

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<v Speaker 2>out a nice card to say what you're grateful for

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<v Speaker 2>about your dad. And this goes from Mother's Day too,

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<v Speaker 2>but since it's Father's Day, you know, say what you're

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<v Speaker 2>really grateful for, what your dad means to you what

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<v Speaker 2>you love that he does, or something silly that he did,

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<v Speaker 2>or whatever it is. Just you know, even if you

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<v Speaker 2>have a contentious relationship, try to let that go into

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<v Speaker 2>the bridge and just for this one moment, reach out

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<v Speaker 2>cross that bridge and tell him what you love about him.

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<v Speaker 2>That's it. I go back to that dance recital thing,

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<v Speaker 2>because here's what we really want every Father's Day. This

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<v Speaker 2>week is the US Open golf tournament. It's one of

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<v Speaker 2>the biggest tournaments of the year. As you guys know,

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<v Speaker 2>as Lauren Begrudges, I love golf. I love it. What

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<v Speaker 2>I really want to do on Sunday is get up,

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<v Speaker 2>see my kids, maybe have a little brunch, little breakfast,

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<v Speaker 2>and I love cooking, so my thing will be cooking

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<v Speaker 2>my kid's breakfast if they're happen to be here at

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<v Speaker 2>the house, and then we just I really just want

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<v Speaker 2>to watch the US Open, hopefully with the kids. Doesn't

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<v Speaker 2>have to be but that's the relaxing day to sit

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<v Speaker 2>back watch the US Open and then maybe barbecue that night.

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<v Speaker 2>The funny thing is about Father's Day is I often

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<v Speaker 2>and I think a lot of fathers end up cooking,

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<v Speaker 2>like we end up barbecuing for our family. I don't

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<v Speaker 2>know why that is, because you know, Mother's Day, it's like, Okay,

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<v Speaker 2>that is the day, like make sure mom doesn't cook,

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<v Speaker 2>Let's take her out, let's do something. Let's just make

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<v Speaker 2>sure she doesn't do anything. Father's Day is not really

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<v Speaker 2>like that. I think it's because a oftentimes stereotypically, we're

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<v Speaker 2>painting with a broadbrush here. A lot of the moms cook,

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<v Speaker 2>a lot of the dads don't. I do love to cook,

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<v Speaker 2>and I do love to barbecue, and I do love

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<v Speaker 2>to make my family happy, and that it's cathartic for me.

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<v Speaker 2>And so part of my joy is going to be

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<v Speaker 2>on Sunday is cooking a beautiful steak dinner for my

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<v Speaker 2>family and open up a great bottle of wine and

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<v Speaker 2>just sit back and listen, and sit back and talk

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<v Speaker 2>to my kids, listen to them and hear where they

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<v Speaker 2>are and find out everything that's going on in their life.

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<v Speaker 2>One more thing I want to add, because I am

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<v Speaker 2>my kids are a product of divorce. My wife and

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<v Speaker 2>I got divorced, and I really am grateful, and I

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<v Speaker 2>am saying this too, hopefully help you guys. I'm grateful

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<v Speaker 2>that on Mother's Day, I make sure my kids know

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<v Speaker 2>they have a great mom, and I make sure that

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<v Speaker 2>they are with her, and then vice versa. On Father's Day.

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<v Speaker 2>She was always great about making sure the kids were

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<v Speaker 2>with me and making sure, you know, when the kids

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<v Speaker 2>were too young to buy gifts. You know, now they're

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<v Speaker 2>on their own, they're in their twenties, but when they

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<v Speaker 2>were too young, make sure the kids had gifts. You know,

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<v Speaker 2>make sure you bought flowers for the kids to give

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<v Speaker 2>to their mom. Vice versa. Make sure the kids get

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<v Speaker 2>a little something, a card, a letter, a picture, you know,

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<v Speaker 2>so they have something to give their dad. I always

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<v Speaker 2>appreciate that about my ex wife, and I think she

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<v Speaker 2>always appreciated that about me. And I know not everybody

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<v Speaker 2>can do that because you're on really not great terms.

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<v Speaker 2>But if you can be the bigger person and do

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<v Speaker 2>that once a year Father's Day and Mother's Day, it

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<v Speaker 2>goes such a long way, not just for the person,

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<v Speaker 2>not just for the mom and the dad, but also

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<v Speaker 2>for the kids. It just lets the kids know, Hey,

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<v Speaker 2>I have a mom who loves me. I have a

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<v Speaker 2>mom who respects my dad. I have a dad who

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<v Speaker 2>loves me. I have a dad who respects my mom.

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<v Speaker 2>That goes a long way. It really is important, and

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<v Speaker 2>a lot of us are a product of divorce. I am,

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<v Speaker 2>my kids are. Unfortunately, it's just the way. It's the

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<v Speaker 2>way of the world, the way things go, and so

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<v Speaker 2>I do think as someone who can speak on that

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<v Speaker 2>it is important. It really helps. And so for those

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<v Speaker 2>of you who have the chance to celebrate with your dad,

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<v Speaker 2>make sure you take that opportunity because, as I know,

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<v Speaker 2>thanks to Lauren and the perspective she's given me, it

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<v Speaker 2>is a blessing. It's a blessing to be a dad.

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<v Speaker 2>I am so grateful for my kids. It's a blessing

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<v Speaker 2>to have a dad to still celebrate that he gets

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<v Speaker 2>to call his grandkids and talk to them as well.

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<v Speaker 2>It is a beautiful thing. And take a moment and

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<v Speaker 2>if nothing else, pick up the phone say Dad, I

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<v Speaker 2>love you, I forgive you. If there's problems in your family,

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<v Speaker 2>I forgive you. I love you for whatever you are,

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<v Speaker 2>whatever you gave me. You're my dad. And you don't

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<v Speaker 2>get to choose your dad. You don't get to choose

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<v Speaker 2>your mom, you don't get to choose your family. But

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<v Speaker 2>that's the dad you were given. That's dad you got.

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<v Speaker 2>And if you can just reach out and just send

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<v Speaker 2>some love, be grateful you have the opportunity to do it,

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<v Speaker 2>and I know I will, And I can't wait to

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<v Speaker 2>hug my kids this week. I can't wait to just

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<v Speaker 2>feel that love and get the perspective of man, I

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<v Speaker 2>help do this, I help create these humans. It is

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<v Speaker 2>a wonderful thing. So Happy Father's Day to all the

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<v Speaker 2>dads out there. I give you all the love and

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<v Speaker 2>for all the bad ties and the bad other things

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<v Speaker 2>that you're going to get, and we will put on

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<v Speaker 2>a brave face and tell you how much we love it.

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<v Speaker 2>That the coffee mug that you made in pottery class,

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<v Speaker 2>or the ashtray that no one's used in the last

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<v Speaker 2>forty five years, we will take it and we will

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<v Speaker 2>love you just the same. Happy Father's Day, everybody.

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<v Speaker 1>Thanks for listening. Follow us on Instagram at the most

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<v Speaker 1>dramatic pod ever and make sure to write us a

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<v Speaker 1>review and leave us five stars. I'll talk to you

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<v Speaker 1>next time.