WEBVTT - Lessons From The Giving Tree

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<v Speaker 1>This is Lee Habib and this is our American Stories,

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<v Speaker 1>thanks so much ahead of time because we've gotten so

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<v Speaker 1>much support from so many listeners. And now on to

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<v Speaker 1>a regular feature with author Winter Persapio. This story is

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<v Speaker 1>about the lessons that Winter learned from the book The

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<v Speaker 1>Giving Tree.

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<v Speaker 2>I thought I had hidden it well enough. I shoved

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<v Speaker 2>it in the back of the bookcase, and it had

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<v Speaker 2>been successfully out of sight for nearly two years. But

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<v Speaker 2>they have no compunction about such things at the library.

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<v Speaker 2>These disturbing works of literature are just out on the shelves,

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<v Speaker 2>within reach of the youngest patrons. The bright green cover

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<v Speaker 2>seized my daughter's attention, and before I knew it, we

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<v Speaker 2>were checking it out the giving Tree was back. I

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<v Speaker 2>have always hated the Giving Tree. This classic book by

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<v Speaker 2>Shells Silverstein is about a little boy who grows into

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<v Speaker 2>an old man, taking and taking and taking from an

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<v Speaker 2>apple tree. First he takes the apples to pick up

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<v Speaker 2>some cash. Then he cuts down the giving tree's branches

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<v Speaker 2>for a house. Then whack down goes the trunk for

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<v Speaker 2>a boat. And the giving tree is nothing but a

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<v Speaker 2>stump which he comes back later and sits on for

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<v Speaker 2>a rest. And the misogynistic creep never once uttered a

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<v Speaker 2>single word of gratitude, and yet at every turn the

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<v Speaker 2>giving tree is happy. I say that is clearly a

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<v Speaker 2>tree in need of some serious therapy, and that boy

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<v Speaker 2>is in need of some hardcore sensitivity training. As a mother,

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<v Speaker 2>there are many days where I feel like I am

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<v Speaker 2>the giving Tree. I spend my day running around as

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<v Speaker 2>a demented waitress, cook, nurse, and cruise director. I referee

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<v Speaker 2>disputes manage egos, bite my tongue fifty times, letting only

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<v Speaker 2>a few inappropriate things slip. I carry a child down

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<v Speaker 2>the stairs who runs up them nightly. I rescue toys

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<v Speaker 2>from under a bed that either daughter can crawl under

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<v Speaker 2>without getting stuck. Halfway. I attend to the needs of

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<v Speaker 2>this family of Leo's who spend the day roaring their

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<v Speaker 2>demands all over the land until about nine pm, until

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<v Speaker 2>at last they are all asleep. And I I am

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<v Speaker 2>a stump, and I am so not happy. I'm ready

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<v Speaker 2>to pick up my roots and skid to some other

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<v Speaker 2>orchard where I'll be watered and fertilized, where my food

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<v Speaker 2>will be prized. My lung branches admired, my thick trunk appreciated.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm just not good at this giving tree thing. I

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<v Speaker 2>thought it would come naturally as a mother, but I

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<v Speaker 2>had no sense how much I'd need to give. My

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<v Speaker 2>cluelessness is undoubtedly the result of a long life without children.

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<v Speaker 2>No other generation has had so much me time before

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<v Speaker 2>becoming parents. Our generation has had the luxury of truly

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<v Speaker 2>choosing the commencement of parenting. For those of us who

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<v Speaker 2>delayed bringing a new life into the world, we now

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<v Speaker 2>have to contend with habits and natures built on a

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<v Speaker 2>foundation that doesn't involve a whole lot of giving. With

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<v Speaker 2>the exception of a few thousand Peace Corps volunteers, the

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<v Speaker 2>rest of us have been the little boy taking from

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<v Speaker 2>the giving tree completely oblivious to its love and generosity.

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<v Speaker 2>We focus on important things with all of our energy

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<v Speaker 2>and resources. These things were very important vc before children, cars, hobbies,

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<v Speaker 2>designer clothes, careers, lives of complete strangers aka celebrities. We

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<v Speaker 2>spent weeks smulling over choices, days discussing the latest trends,

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<v Speaker 2>and hours sharing the juiciest bits of gossip. When children arrived,

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<v Speaker 2>all these seemingly vital activities fade from our lives until

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<v Speaker 2>we've found ourselves behind the wheels of minivans or they're

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<v Speaker 2>carefully disguised equivalents, wearing anything that came out of the

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<v Speaker 2>dryer and reasonable condition, talking on the phone about soccer schedules,

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<v Speaker 2>and boxing up our collections to set them out for

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<v Speaker 2>the next yard sale. Because now it's our turn to

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<v Speaker 2>become the giving tree. Now is when we begin coughing

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<v Speaker 2>up the apples and branches and soon a trunk. Some

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<v Speaker 2>of us are better at being giving tree than others.

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<v Speaker 2>Some of us. Okay, so I'm a rotten giving tree.

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<v Speaker 2>I struggle more often than I like to admit with

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<v Speaker 2>the role of relentless giver. And then it happens. My daughters,

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<v Speaker 2>perhaps sensing the impending root rot in their giving trees

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<v Speaker 2>suddenly begin to transform the orchard. They make me laugh,

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<v Speaker 2>helpful of clothes, put away dishes, and cover me with

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<v Speaker 2>hugs and kisses. They take my spirit in their hands

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<v Speaker 2>and toss it into the air like leaves, giggling as

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<v Speaker 2>they catch me in their arms. They say, thank you, mommy,

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<v Speaker 2>You're wonderful. And even though I taught them to say

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<v Speaker 2>that as a joke, it still feels good on those days.

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<v Speaker 2>By ten pm, I don't care if I'm a stump.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't even realize I'm giving. I'm just mom, a

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<v Speaker 2>mother of two wonderful daughters, and being a giving tree

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<v Speaker 2>seems like the easiest thing in the world until the

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<v Speaker 2>sun rises and it begins again. I've come to realize

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<v Speaker 2>that happy for a giving tree and a mother is

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<v Speaker 2>not about comfort and relaxation. Happy is about having my

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<v Speaker 2>little ones run beneath my branches, sheltering them in my shade,

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<v Speaker 2>tossing out a few apples, and in the end, giving

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<v Speaker 2>all that I have. Slowly, I am learning to be

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<v Speaker 2>a giving tree as I'm trying to teach my children

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<v Speaker 2>a sense of gratitude for all the giving that surrounds us.

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<v Speaker 2>I am learning that this level of giving is not

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<v Speaker 2>something we know how to do the moment our children arrive,

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<v Speaker 2>Like gratitude, giving is something we have to learn. I

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<v Speaker 2>guess at this point I'll dig out the giving tree

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<v Speaker 2>from our bookcase. Maybe if I pencil in an occasional

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<v Speaker 2>thank you You're wonderful, I'll feel just a little better,

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<v Speaker 2>at least until I get the hang of all this giving.

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<v Speaker 1>And great job on that piece, faith and a beautiful

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<v Speaker 1>performance by Winter Persapio, giving us something we have to

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<v Speaker 1>learn and you have to almost develop an appetite for it.

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<v Speaker 1>And my goodness, Winter has and what a beautiful piece

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<v Speaker 1>of storytelling. We're looking for your stories too, about motherhood fatherhood,

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<v Speaker 1>because these are two things that matter so much in

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<v Speaker 1>this country. Now more than ever, kids are starving for love,

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<v Speaker 1>the lessons from the giving tree Winter Persapio's story here

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