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Speaker 1: Hello, Hey, this is Steve. How's it going on?

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Speaker 2: This has gone good? How are you doing, Steve Greed?

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Speaker 1: I'm glad to be here. I'm a huge fan.

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Speaker 2: Oh I'm a fucking fan of you, dude. Nah, Steve, Steve, Steve,

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Speaker 2: what's going on with you today? Steve?

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Speaker 1: Well, I come to you, mister ghek. I like I

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Speaker 1: go by froud Wood Steve on the internet, so I

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Speaker 1: can kind of relate to you as a fellow Greenman. Sorry,

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Speaker 1: I'm nervous.

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Speaker 2: Never here now, nervous. It's just us here on the computer.

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Speaker 1: Exactly, just us on the computer. So my problem is,

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Speaker 1: I've been for the past couple of weeks now, I

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Speaker 1: have been talking with this girl on the internet, and

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Speaker 1: I felt like we made a pretty strong connection. But

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Speaker 1: as things have gone I am feeling as if I

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Speaker 1: may not be anything more than just a wallet to her.

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Speaker 2: Why do you feel that way?

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Speaker 1: Well, it seems there's times when I feel like I

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Speaker 1: can only get any sort of reciprocation when or any

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Speaker 1: kind of attention away from her other friends, is when

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Speaker 1: I buy her something.

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Speaker 2: Okay, have you met this woman in real life before?

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Speaker 1: I have not.

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Speaker 2: Okay, what kinds of things have you been buying for her?

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Speaker 1: Well, she's into like kpop stuff, so I bought her.

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Speaker 1: They have like these photo card collections that people correct,

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Speaker 1: and I bought a whole bunch, a whole collection of

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Speaker 1: this one girl that she's into for her. That's one

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Speaker 1: thing I bought her stuff on, like video games that

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Speaker 1: we play, like Legal Regions Islant. I brought a bunch

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Speaker 1: of skins stuff like that.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I've spent probably upwards of close to one thousand dollars already.

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Speaker 2: Okay, have you ever video chatted with her?

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Speaker 1: Yes?

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Speaker 2: Okay, let me ask you this. Why do you think

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Speaker 2: you are doing this?

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Speaker 1: I can give you an honest answer. I can do it.

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Speaker 1: I do it because I think I'm desperate for a

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Speaker 1: woman detention, and I think I cring on to the

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Speaker 1: first sign of interest in any way, shape or form.

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Speaker 2: Mm hmm. Have you always been like that.

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Speaker 1: For the last few years of my life? Probably? Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I think as I get older it becomes worse. Mm hmmm.

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Speaker 2: Why do you think it gets worse as you get older?

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Speaker 1: Ah, I don't have very much success meeting people in

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Speaker 1: real life. I work from a home and I don't drink,

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Speaker 1: so I don't like go out to bars or anything.

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Speaker 1: I don't. I just it's hard to meet people in

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Speaker 1: real life.

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Speaker 3: M h.

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Speaker 1: M hmm.

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Speaker 2: Would you say you have low self esteem? Where do

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Speaker 2: you think that comes from?

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Speaker 1: Uh, my own insecurities as a as a human. I'm

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Speaker 1: a I'm an I'm an overweight man, and self image mostly.

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Speaker 2: Mm hm.

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Speaker 1: That and I feel there hasn't been a whole lot

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Speaker 1: of times in my life where I've been I've had

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Speaker 1: reasons to feel confident. I feel like no one else

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Speaker 1: has really had confidence in me, So it's hard to

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Speaker 1: instill that upon myself. I know that I should. I

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Speaker 1: just don't really know how.

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Speaker 2: What kinds of things do you think would give you

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Speaker 2: more confidence?

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Speaker 1: Uh, I don't know. I'd like to see myself, you know,

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Speaker 1: start losing some weight. I've been kind of doing that

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Speaker 1: a little bit this year, but I think if I can,

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Speaker 1: if I can knock that out, it would help my

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Speaker 1: at least my self image and self esteem in that

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Speaker 1: regard a little bit. But you know, they say you

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Speaker 1: can't love anybody, so you love yourself, So I guess

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Speaker 1: that's really what I'm working on.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, man, So this is a really this is really

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Speaker 2: interesting stuff that you're bringing up here because and this

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Speaker 2: is a lesson I had to learn myself that I'm

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Speaker 2: telling you here is you're trying to fix an internal

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Speaker 2: issue through external means, having the validation of other people,

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Speaker 2: having the validation of this girl. It may fix your

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Speaker 2: issue temporarily in the moment, but it's not a sustainable

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Speaker 2: solution because their validation is fleeting. It is what's the

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Speaker 2: word I'm looking for. It is inconsistent and it is

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Speaker 2: not a thing that you want to be dependent on.

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Speaker 2: Instead of finding the solution to your problem of insecurity

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Speaker 2: by trying to get other people to like you, you

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Speaker 2: need to go one eighty and find that through means

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Speaker 2: that are completely in one hundred percent within your control.

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Speaker 2: It is a harder and longer road because sometimes it

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Speaker 2: feels like it's a it's a shorter cut to you know,

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Speaker 2: pay a girl, you know, for Valoris Skins or for

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Speaker 2: whatever else it is, to get her to like you.

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Speaker 2: It's like, I think one of the reasons why you

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Speaker 2: might feel inclined to do that is because it's a

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Speaker 2: little bit of a short cut, and it's like, Okay,

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Speaker 2: if I do this, then I don't have to do

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Speaker 2: the internal work and walk the long road of building

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Speaker 2: internal confidence. And I get that, man. I don't think

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Speaker 2: that's something you need to be ashamed of or or

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Speaker 2: feel like you're an inceell for or anything like that.

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Speaker 2: It's it's a really understandable impulse. But I think that

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Speaker 2: if you you got to just really understand that that

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Speaker 2: the only sustainable solution to your problem is to walk

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Speaker 2: the long road of building internal confidence.

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Speaker 1: I agree, I I definitely recognize that obviously, Like you said,

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Speaker 1: it's easier said than done, but uh yeah, I couldn't agree.

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Speaker 1: I couldn't agree anymore dred percent.

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Speaker 2: It is easier said than done. Dude. When I was

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Speaker 2: in college, I was like obsessed with Tinder, and I

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Speaker 2: was really I was really obsessed with like trying to

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Speaker 2: get validation through like you know, other people like me,

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Speaker 2: you know, or things like that. And it's just it's

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Speaker 2: just not the correct way of going about that. You know,

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Speaker 2: you really have to find things within yourself that give

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Speaker 2: you self esteem. I mean, now it's and it's weird, man,

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Speaker 2: because you know you're saying you're overweight. I mean, dude,

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Speaker 2: I'm the most overweight I've been in my life. But

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Speaker 2: I feel confident in myself and what gives me confidence

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Speaker 2: in myself lately is that I just I know when

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Speaker 2: I wake up in the morning that I fucking try.

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Speaker 2: You know, that's all that matters. I don't get I

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Speaker 2: don't I don't get confidence or validation from people dm

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Speaker 2: ing me that you know I've helped them with this podcast,

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Speaker 2: or from some girl liking me, or from any of

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Speaker 2: that stuff. It's it's lately just been you know what,

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Speaker 2: fuck it. I wake up and I do the best

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Speaker 2: I can with however limited of energy.

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Speaker 4: I have.

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Speaker 2: To figure stuff out to try and be nice to people,

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Speaker 2: to exert some kind of energy out into the world.

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Speaker 2: And if anyone wants to give me shit, go ahead.

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Speaker 2: But I fucking tried. That's that's what gives me confidence,

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Speaker 2: more than anyone externally telling me anything, you know, And

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Speaker 2: it took it took a really long time to get

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Speaker 2: to that point. But if you can find something like

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Speaker 2: that for yourself, that you can really cling to and

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Speaker 2: that you can really believe in, not just like try

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Speaker 2: to get yourself to believe in, but that you can

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Speaker 2: poke around at all the angles and be like, no,

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Speaker 2: this is true, I really I did. I tried, And

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Speaker 2: that's my rock of self esteem. Then you'll just be

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Speaker 2: happier man's and and I just I know from experience,

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Speaker 2: so I don't know if any of that resonated with you, but.

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Speaker 1: I think very insightful shit. I think I just wanted

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Speaker 1: to throw one one thing and then I kind of

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Speaker 1: left this out because it's probably the biggest insecurity I have,

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Speaker 1: and I don't admit it to many people, but especially

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Speaker 1: the climate, and not climate, but the society, the male

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Speaker 1: dominated size society we live in these days where everything's

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Speaker 1: about you know, who gets the most bitches or whatever,

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Speaker 1: et cetera. Like sex is a lot of big part

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Speaker 1: of this world. I'm twenty six years old and I'm

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Speaker 1: a virgin, and that drives me insane a little good

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Speaker 1: sometimes to think about. You know, I'm not getting any younger.

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Speaker 1: My friends they all have they have families like the

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Speaker 1: children I have little nephews like and it makes me

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Speaker 1: sit here like I'm twenty What am I doing?

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Speaker 2: Hmm? Well, first of all, you're not. You're definitely not alone.

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Speaker 2: There are lots and lots and lots and lots and

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Speaker 2: lots of guys out there who are also Uh. I

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Speaker 2: guess you could say, you know, virgins at an age

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Speaker 2: where most people aren't. But I mean, tell me, okay,

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Speaker 2: tell me more about your personal relationship with that. I

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Speaker 2: want to dive a little bit deeper into that. Do

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Speaker 2: you feel like an embarrassment? Do you feel you know,

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Speaker 2: what is your relationship with that aspect of your life?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it's definitely something I'm embarrassed about. I think I've

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Speaker 1: only told I've only explicitly told like two or three

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Speaker 1: people in my life about it, because you know, I mean,

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Speaker 1: obviously it comes up sometimes. I don't feel like, you know,

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Speaker 1: if I'm hanging with the boys and everyone's talking about

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Speaker 1: like ill, you know, just like sex stuff, I'm just

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Speaker 1: sitting there with my my sumb up my ass, not

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Speaker 1: knowing any of them that I feel left out. I

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Speaker 1: feel embarrassed, I feel ashamed, I feel like I'm behind.

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Speaker 1: I don't know, I feel I'll feel a lot of

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Speaker 1: things about it.

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Speaker 2: M why do you feel like you're well, Okay, let

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Speaker 2: me ask yourselfing take away if we could for a second,

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Speaker 2: take away the boys you know talking about sex. Take

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Speaker 2: away the general societal expectation that you lose your virginity

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Speaker 2: at a certain age. Take away, the shame take take

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Speaker 2: take it all away then just for a second, like

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Speaker 2: what's important to you in your life? How does being

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Speaker 2: a virgin compare to just what's important to your life

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Speaker 2: in general?

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Speaker 4: Right?

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Speaker 2: Like is sex? Is it really important to you? And

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Speaker 2: by the way, completely okay if the answer is yes,

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Speaker 2: very but I just want to know what the answer is.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean I think I mean, to be honest,

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Speaker 1: something there. I don't think it's like, it's not super

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Speaker 1: important to me. It doesn't define you know, who I am.

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Speaker 1: I'm not out there looking to you know, stick my

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Speaker 1: dick into anything that moves, obviously, but I just think

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Speaker 1: it's not it's it's more of just a crutch. I

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Speaker 1: guess at this point it's like a milestone that I

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Speaker 1: feel like I should have reached, even until as it sounds,

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Speaker 1: but I think, you know, it's not super important.

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Speaker 2: But yeah, okay, that's what I wanted to know, and

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Speaker 2: it would be fine if it is. If you're like, no,

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Speaker 2: I really want to know what sex feels like. I

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Speaker 2: really want to like if that was your truth, then

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Speaker 2: that would you know, It's totally fine. But I was

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Speaker 2: just wondering if, if, if that is important to you

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Speaker 2: and from what you've told me. Just now you're saying

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Speaker 2: it is not.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean I wouldn't. I mean, obviously I'm not

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Speaker 1: gonna you know, I wouldn't mind. But it's not like

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Speaker 1: it's not top priority because I'm my life.

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Speaker 2: Okay. But althoughkay, okay, But so all the other things

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Speaker 2: that we've been talking about, though, finding a sense of

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Speaker 2: security within yourself. That sounds like, and again, tell me

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Speaker 2: if I'm wrong, but that sounds like that is important

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Speaker 2: to you.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I would like to kind of like you said,

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Speaker 1: you know, when you wake up and you're confident in

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Speaker 1: yourself that you're trying and you're doing your best every day.

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Speaker 1: I want to I want to be able to feel

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Speaker 1: that about myself.

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Speaker 2: Mm hmmmm. By I don't feel that every day. Sometimes

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Speaker 2: I'm like, fuck, I was a piece of shit today,

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Speaker 2: you know. But even even then, even you know what

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Speaker 2: I'm I lately, my thing is, you know, even then,

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Speaker 2: even the days where I'm like fuck, I just slept

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Speaker 2: all day, I didn't do the things I was supposed

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Speaker 2: to do. Try to be less hard on myself and

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Speaker 2: just be like, okay, well that's a version of trying

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Speaker 2: the best I can in a sense, in a weird way.

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Speaker 2: I'm still not working on that, but m dude, I

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Speaker 2: feel like walking the path of finding security within yourself.

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Speaker 2: It sounds like it's the most important thing for you

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Speaker 2: to do right now. And losing your virginity I think

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Speaker 2: will happen as a result of that, right, because you'll

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Speaker 2: become more attractive if you're more secure in yourself.

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Speaker 1: Right.

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Speaker 2: But but you know, it's another thing, man. It's like,

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Speaker 2: you know, I was just talking about like losing your

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Speaker 2: virginity and sex, and well, it's just another It's just

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Speaker 2: another external thing. It's just another fucking external thing that

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Speaker 2: is not a sustainable way of building self confidence. I

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Speaker 2: would look at it like that, It's just another fucking

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Speaker 2: external thing. Like like I don't know, dude, Say you

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Speaker 2: got to a bar one day and you meet a

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Speaker 2: girl and she happens to be into you, and you

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Speaker 2: guys have sex and then boom, now you're not a

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Speaker 2: virgin anymore. Like is that really gonna change your life?

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Speaker 2: You know, like, Okay, maybe you won't feel like so

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Speaker 2: whatever about being a virgin, But is that really gonna

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Speaker 2: sustainably change your life for the better in a long

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Speaker 2: term way? It's not. That's the that's the truth. The

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Speaker 2: only way to sustainably change your life for the better

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Speaker 2: and long term way is to do all the other ship.

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Speaker 2: We've been talking about it about looking inwards. So I

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Speaker 2: just hope you recognize that, because because it took me

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Speaker 2: a while to recognize that too.

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Speaker 1: So I think, yeah, I definitely I don't agree with that,

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Speaker 1: But I think going back to the original point, then,

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Speaker 1: do you think I should stop talking to this girl?

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Speaker 2: Yes, you should definitely stop talking to this girl.

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Speaker 1: Gotcha. I tried. I actually did try, but she had

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Speaker 1: to me back and then I felt free to again.

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Speaker 2: Oh, I mean I did. I. Look, don't don't be

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Speaker 2: so hard on yourself. I know that. You know, at

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Speaker 2: the beginning you said the chat was calling you or whatever,

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Speaker 2: but like you know, it's Look, it's it's tempting. Man.

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Speaker 2: You have a you have this like problem, and here

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Speaker 2: here is an easy solution to the problem. It's fucking

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Speaker 2: fucking tempting.

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Speaker 1: Man.

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Speaker 2: Like, I get it. I'm gonna sit here and be like,

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Speaker 2: I don't know why why is he doing it?

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Speaker 1: Like?

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Speaker 2: I get it, man, Like it's a tempting band aid

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Speaker 2: to the self esteem problem. It's fucking tempting. I totally

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Speaker 2: get it. You know, try your that's dude, try your

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Speaker 2: best to resip the to resist the temptation. But when

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Speaker 2: you give in, don't spiral out of control as beating

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Speaker 2: yourself up. It's understandable. You're working on this thing and

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Speaker 2: you're not gonna get it perfect the first time, but

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Speaker 2: as long as you keep working on.

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Speaker 1: It, right well, uh yeah, that was awesome, Thank you,

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Speaker 1: Thank you. Well, I really appreciate the time today.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, man, and good good luck to you. I'm I I,

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Speaker 2: like I said, it's a it's a hard path and

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Speaker 2: everyone kind of has their own thing that builds their

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Speaker 2: internal self confidence. And it's something I'm fucking working on

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Speaker 2: every day still. But you know, it's it's it's kind

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Speaker 2: of I think the only way to do it. And

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Speaker 2: and and good luck to you and Steve, thanks for

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Speaker 2: I know this is something you don't talk to a

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Speaker 2: lot of people about, so thanks for, uh you don't

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Speaker 2: having the courage to talk to us about.

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Speaker 1: It, one hundred percent, it helps kind of having that.

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Speaker 1: And I'm m Toby, I can't say that word that

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Speaker 1: well of the internet, but you know, a huge fan

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Speaker 1: of the therapy gected watching you for a while, so

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Speaker 1: figured i'd give it a shot and see if I

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Speaker 1: can get on.

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Speaker 2: Hey, thanks, Steve, talk too soon, take care a while.

300
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Speaker 2: Let's see. Yeah, everything I was talking to Steve about

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Speaker 2: is the thing that took me a while to realize.

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Speaker 2: I feel like there's there's and and everyone this. I

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Speaker 2: don't think this is specifically like, you know, a guy issue.

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Speaker 2: I think this is just a general human being thing,

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Speaker 2: like the struggle for finding internal validations so that you're

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Speaker 2: not looking to other people or to events or you

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Speaker 2: know whatever, sex or likes on the internet or whatever,

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Speaker 2: whatever the fucking thing is for validation. It's a struggle

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Speaker 2: that a lot of people have, and I'm not a

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Speaker 2: master of it by any means. It's something I've been

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Speaker 2: struggling with for a while. Everyone has that struggle to

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Speaker 2: some degree, and it's hard. It's really hard to build

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Speaker 2: that internal rock. But I think the first step to

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Speaker 2: it is to is to snap the fuck out of

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Speaker 2: the mindset of Okay, well, if I finally have sex,

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Speaker 2: i'm not a virgin, then I'll feel validated, you know.

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Speaker 2: Or Oh, if I have a girlfriend or a boyfriend,

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Speaker 2: I'll feel validated. Oh if I make this thing on

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Speaker 2: the Internet, and lots of people tell me every day

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Speaker 2: how much they they love this thing. I'll feel validated.

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Speaker 2: It's it's just not. It doesn't fucking work like that.

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Speaker 2: It really doesn't. And I've been really lucky to kind

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Speaker 2: of be able to experience all the things that I

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Speaker 2: thought would make me feel validated if I were to

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Speaker 2: experience them, because that, for me, was the only way

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Speaker 2: to then realize, oh, okay, that's not the answer to

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Speaker 2: then go back and go okay, you actually have to,

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Speaker 2: as I was just talking to Steve about do the

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Speaker 2: one eighty and look within for for validation. You know,

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Speaker 2: I'm grateful for that, but if I can tell you now,

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Speaker 2: you know, if you the first is to realize you're

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Speaker 2: not going to find it anywhere other than within. You

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00:22:05,240 --> 00:22:10,280
Speaker 2: are on a wild goose chase. Otherwise, all right? That

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00:22:10,480 --> 00:22:14,080
Speaker 2: was That was That was my little gecko talk. That

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00:22:14,240 --> 00:22:16,760
Speaker 2: was my little gecko talk. Sometimes I forget that I'm

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00:22:16,760 --> 00:22:25,200
Speaker 2: streaming and I just talk to myself. Thank you again, Steve. Hello, Hello,

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Speaker 2: how are you h what's going on?

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Speaker 4: How are you?

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Speaker 2: I am? I'm a gecko, You're a gecko. What's going

340
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Speaker 2: on with you?

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Speaker 4: Nothing? I'm just showing in bed, I was smoking waiting

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Speaker 4: again on the show hopefully the weed of course.

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Speaker 2: How how stone are you right now?

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Speaker 4: To be honest with you, I'm not really that stoned.

345
00:23:00,520 --> 00:23:06,240
Speaker 4: I smoke every day. So more so like, let's chill

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Speaker 4: and see if I get on the show.

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Speaker 2: Okay, you know I wanted to. I'm gonna. I know

348
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Speaker 2: you have a thing you want to talk about it,

349
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Speaker 2: But I want to ask you this real quick. How

350
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Speaker 2: how does smoking weed make you feel? Because I feel

351
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Speaker 2: like it affects everyone super differently, and I have my

352
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Speaker 2: own way that it makes me feel, and it's I'm

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Speaker 2: very interested in how how differently it affects people.

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Speaker 4: Well. To be honest with you, I've been smoking every

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Speaker 4: day for the past four years, I'd say, like consistently, sure,

356
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Speaker 4: so to be honest with you, it's not so much

357
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Speaker 4: of a like, oh, like I'm so big, like I

358
00:23:45,640 --> 00:23:47,679
Speaker 4: don't even know how to handle myself. It's not like

359
00:23:47,720 --> 00:23:52,440
Speaker 4: a drug to me. It's more so like, let's just chill,

360
00:23:52,800 --> 00:23:57,040
Speaker 4: smoke a bowl, calm down. It just calms everything down.

361
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Speaker 4: Like that's really the best way.

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Speaker 2: Well, I feel like after getting high every day for

363
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Speaker 2: four years, it's it's almost like it's your baseline.

364
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Speaker 4: Yeah, basically, I mean even in my fucking license photo,

365
00:24:09,600 --> 00:24:12,679
Speaker 4: we got might be bigged in there. So if I

366
00:24:12,680 --> 00:24:14,760
Speaker 4: get BIGGD colled over out looks the same in my

367
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Speaker 4: license photo.

368
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Speaker 2: You know what. I I want to say that that's

369
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Speaker 2: a smart move, but I feel like that would be

370
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Speaker 2: responsible of me to say, so I'll imply it indirectly. Autumn,

371
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Speaker 2: what's that? What's what's going on? How how can I

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Speaker 2: get you today?

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Speaker 4: Well, I am in love with somebody that I met

374
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Speaker 4: less than a month ago, and I truly believe that

375
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Speaker 4: it's love it first night. And I know it kind

376
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Speaker 4: of sound stupid, but.

377
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Speaker 2: Yeah, what makes you believe that it is love at

378
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Speaker 2: first sight?

379
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Speaker 4: Well, to think about it though, is like I truly

380
00:24:58,200 --> 00:25:04,280
Speaker 4: believe in like human connection and like soul connections, twin flames, soulmates,

381
00:25:04,359 --> 00:25:10,120
Speaker 4: all of that. Like I can feel somebody's energy while

382
00:25:10,240 --> 00:25:13,080
Speaker 4: talking to them, I can read somebody's body language like

383
00:25:13,680 --> 00:25:16,760
Speaker 4: the whole fucking nine yards, And it's like, just with

384
00:25:16,880 --> 00:25:21,040
Speaker 4: this one specific person, I've never felt more of a

385
00:25:22,080 --> 00:25:26,680
Speaker 4: like a connection almost like I really don't I really

386
00:25:26,680 --> 00:25:28,080
Speaker 4: do know how to describe it, Like the first time

387
00:25:28,119 --> 00:25:31,520
Speaker 4: I hugged him when I first met him, like it

388
00:25:31,600 --> 00:25:36,400
Speaker 4: was unreal. It's there's no words to describe it. That's

389
00:25:36,400 --> 00:25:38,800
Speaker 4: why I feel like love at first sight is really

390
00:25:39,840 --> 00:25:42,040
Speaker 4: a true thing when I don't have any words to

391
00:25:42,080 --> 00:25:43,440
Speaker 4: describe it.

392
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Speaker 2: Is this something that you felt before?

393
00:25:48,320 --> 00:25:52,439
Speaker 4: No, that's the thing. I've never felt it before. And

394
00:25:52,480 --> 00:25:55,280
Speaker 4: now there has tea and we've had like long conversations

395
00:25:55,280 --> 00:25:55,960
Speaker 4: about this too.

396
00:25:58,320 --> 00:26:05,080
Speaker 2: So so are you It says here that you are

397
00:26:05,640 --> 00:26:09,800
Speaker 2: planning on getting married to this guy.

398
00:26:09,880 --> 00:26:15,000
Speaker 4: Yeah, So that's something that really caught my mind because

399
00:26:16,080 --> 00:26:18,560
Speaker 4: it was kind of a joke, like I had like

400
00:26:18,600 --> 00:26:22,320
Speaker 4: a bunch of rings on and I put my left

401
00:26:22,320 --> 00:26:25,639
Speaker 4: hand out and my left hand didn't have a ring finger,

402
00:26:25,720 --> 00:26:27,840
Speaker 4: I mean a ring on my ring finger. And I

403
00:26:28,000 --> 00:26:31,280
Speaker 4: was like, oh, look it's missing something. As a joke,

404
00:26:31,440 --> 00:26:33,120
Speaker 4: you know what I mean, like saying that like it's

405
00:26:33,160 --> 00:26:36,120
Speaker 4: missing a wedding ring. I joke all the time. I'm

406
00:26:36,119 --> 00:26:39,160
Speaker 4: a fucking sarcastic person. And he kind of looked at

407
00:26:39,200 --> 00:26:41,440
Speaker 4: me differently, and I was like, what, you actually want

408
00:26:41,440 --> 00:26:44,159
Speaker 4: to get married to me? And he was like that

409
00:26:44,200 --> 00:26:47,440
Speaker 4: wouldn't be a bad option though, And I was like, wait,

410
00:26:47,480 --> 00:26:50,520
Speaker 4: would you actually like like we kind of just like

411
00:26:50,600 --> 00:26:54,160
Speaker 4: got into a full conversation about it, and we realized, like, no,

412
00:26:54,359 --> 00:26:58,200
Speaker 4: like I would actually get married to you, Like I've

413
00:26:58,240 --> 00:27:01,480
Speaker 4: never felt this type of emotion towards somebody, The type

414
00:27:01,520 --> 00:27:07,879
Speaker 4: of energy towards somebody, Like it's undescribable. That's the problem,

415
00:27:08,160 --> 00:27:13,520
Speaker 4: because there's no way to like actually put it into words.

416
00:27:13,880 --> 00:27:16,520
Speaker 2: So it is an indescribable energy that you are feeling.

417
00:27:19,880 --> 00:27:24,760
Speaker 2: What exactly are you looking for? Let me let me

418
00:27:24,760 --> 00:27:29,520
Speaker 2: rephrase this question. Why is love important to you?

419
00:27:33,119 --> 00:27:37,840
Speaker 4: If I'm being truly honest, I feel like I never

420
00:27:38,400 --> 00:27:40,679
Speaker 4: received it in the way that I've always wanted to

421
00:27:40,760 --> 00:27:45,280
Speaker 4: receive love like past relationships. Wise, I'm not talking about

422
00:27:45,320 --> 00:27:48,040
Speaker 4: like my family, like my mom or grandparents or any

423
00:27:48,040 --> 00:27:50,560
Speaker 4: of that type of shit. Like I'm talking about like

424
00:27:51,119 --> 00:27:55,200
Speaker 4: true love, like just wanting to find my true love.

425
00:27:56,119 --> 00:27:58,160
Speaker 4: And I don't know why. Maybe that's just because I've

426
00:27:58,160 --> 00:28:01,719
Speaker 4: always been on like the search for it. But I

427
00:28:01,800 --> 00:28:04,200
Speaker 4: hopped on bumble and I was just like, fuck it,

428
00:28:04,280 --> 00:28:06,840
Speaker 4: let's go get some free dinners.

429
00:28:07,080 --> 00:28:09,399
Speaker 2: And I mean so well, so so so hold on

430
00:28:09,440 --> 00:28:10,720
Speaker 2: top because I want to. I want to, I want to.

431
00:28:10,760 --> 00:28:12,640
Speaker 2: I want to answer you this real quick because because

432
00:28:12,760 --> 00:28:18,440
Speaker 2: you said to me that you want love in your

433
00:28:18,520 --> 00:28:22,320
Speaker 2: life because you've just been searching for You've just been

434
00:28:22,359 --> 00:28:25,240
Speaker 2: searching for it for so long that you haven't even

435
00:28:25,280 --> 00:28:29,080
Speaker 2: stopped to think about why you're searching it or or

436
00:28:29,359 --> 00:28:31,879
Speaker 2: you know, ever asked yourself that question.

437
00:28:32,359 --> 00:28:35,320
Speaker 4: Well, see, that's that's the thing, though I haven't. It's

438
00:28:35,320 --> 00:28:38,160
Speaker 4: not that I haven't stopped, like I have stopped. I've

439
00:28:38,200 --> 00:28:40,440
Speaker 4: stopped and really thought, like, how do I want to

440
00:28:40,480 --> 00:28:45,880
Speaker 4: be treated? How do I want somebody to like really

441
00:28:46,200 --> 00:28:48,360
Speaker 4: treat me in a relationship? How do I want somebody

442
00:28:48,400 --> 00:28:50,600
Speaker 4: to show love towards me? How do I want somebody

443
00:28:50,600 --> 00:28:54,680
Speaker 4: to truly understand me? Can they deal with my depression

444
00:28:54,720 --> 00:28:58,800
Speaker 4: and my anxiety? Like somebody who is one hundred percent

445
00:28:58,920 --> 00:29:03,719
Speaker 4: the person that I imagine them to be and the person

446
00:29:03,800 --> 00:29:08,160
Speaker 4: that I met, Like, he is that, and that's weird.

447
00:29:08,760 --> 00:29:11,800
Speaker 4: So it's weird to find somebody who shows me true loves.

448
00:29:12,960 --> 00:29:18,000
Speaker 2: So you you have imagined this person and you say

449
00:29:18,040 --> 00:29:21,680
Speaker 2: that this is somebody who is exactly who you imagined

450
00:29:21,720 --> 00:29:27,520
Speaker 2: them to be. Basically, Yeah, so let me ask you this.

451
00:29:28,080 --> 00:29:29,400
Speaker 2: You said you've known them for a month.

452
00:29:31,280 --> 00:29:34,240
Speaker 4: Mm hmm. That's the that's the that's the catch there.

453
00:29:34,560 --> 00:29:38,720
Speaker 2: Yeah, how long do you believe that it takes to

454
00:29:39,240 --> 00:29:40,840
Speaker 2: really get to know a person.

455
00:29:46,200 --> 00:29:51,040
Speaker 4: I don't know what I mean, it really depends on

456
00:29:52,360 --> 00:29:54,400
Speaker 4: like the conversation. I don't think there's really like a

457
00:29:54,480 --> 00:29:59,320
Speaker 4: time limit. Like you could spend weeks and weeks working

458
00:29:59,360 --> 00:30:03,880
Speaker 4: with somebody and not know a single fucking thing about

459
00:30:03,920 --> 00:30:05,560
Speaker 4: them because the only thing to talk about is work,

460
00:30:05,880 --> 00:30:09,400
Speaker 4: or they don't talk at all, they're not a social person.

461
00:30:10,120 --> 00:30:13,600
Speaker 4: But when like the other day we sat down and

462
00:30:13,640 --> 00:30:17,479
Speaker 4: watched the stars and smoked the blunt and fucking cuddled

463
00:30:17,480 --> 00:30:19,880
Speaker 4: on the beach and we were talking about life and

464
00:30:20,000 --> 00:30:24,720
Speaker 4: like like goals and like it's just it's not just conversation,

465
00:30:24,920 --> 00:30:27,960
Speaker 4: it's just like really really getting to know somebody. Knowing

466
00:30:28,000 --> 00:30:35,200
Speaker 4: somebody's like true emotion, true feeling Like this, Sam, what else?

467
00:30:35,560 --> 00:30:37,280
Speaker 2: Tell me? What else was going on in your life

468
00:30:37,280 --> 00:30:37,840
Speaker 2: at this moment?

469
00:30:40,560 --> 00:30:40,840
Speaker 5: Really?

470
00:30:40,880 --> 00:30:44,280
Speaker 4: Nothing? I mean I was going out of college, I

471
00:30:44,320 --> 00:30:48,320
Speaker 4: was in a job. I was really just making money

472
00:30:48,360 --> 00:30:51,880
Speaker 4: to pay for college. So it was kind of just like, oh,

473
00:30:51,960 --> 00:30:54,680
Speaker 4: let's just hop on bumble and have some fun. I mean,

474
00:30:54,760 --> 00:30:59,360
Speaker 4: I was in a past relationship a little before that,

475
00:30:59,680 --> 00:31:01,600
Speaker 4: But okay, what was.

476
00:31:01,920 --> 00:31:03,400
Speaker 2: What was that past relationship?

477
00:31:03,520 --> 00:31:06,160
Speaker 3: Like see.

478
00:31:06,160 --> 00:31:10,880
Speaker 4: That's the thing, though, is that was really shitting probably

479
00:31:10,920 --> 00:31:15,400
Speaker 4: about like two weeks, and not even two weeks two days.

480
00:31:15,920 --> 00:31:19,720
Speaker 4: It was an argument after an argument after disagreement, after

481
00:31:20,680 --> 00:31:22,560
Speaker 4: he didn't like the fact that I was going out

482
00:31:22,640 --> 00:31:26,200
Speaker 4: with an old guy best friend who actually has a boyfriend,

483
00:31:26,320 --> 00:31:28,000
Speaker 4: and I tried explaining that to him, and he said

484
00:31:28,000 --> 00:31:32,120
Speaker 4: that he could still hit on me. He didn't like

485
00:31:32,160 --> 00:31:34,920
Speaker 4: that I was going out with my guy cousins, like

486
00:31:35,880 --> 00:31:38,320
Speaker 4: he wouldn't like the fact that I would wear a

487
00:31:38,400 --> 00:31:41,920
Speaker 4: crop top and a skirt, that it wore a lot

488
00:31:41,920 --> 00:31:46,800
Speaker 4: of makeup, that I wore a big, chunky platforms, that

489
00:31:47,120 --> 00:31:50,200
Speaker 4: I didn't mind yelling at somebody on the street who

490
00:31:50,760 --> 00:31:54,880
Speaker 4: would say something back to me. It was very controlling,

491
00:31:55,440 --> 00:31:57,880
Speaker 4: and I am not one to be controlled. I am

492
00:31:57,920 --> 00:32:04,040
Speaker 4: the last person to be controlled. Immediately when it started,

493
00:32:04,120 --> 00:32:06,240
Speaker 4: I mean not immediately, within like two weeks.

494
00:32:06,440 --> 00:32:09,520
Speaker 2: But well, that's good. I'm glad to hear. I'm glad

495
00:32:09,560 --> 00:32:12,600
Speaker 2: to hear that you have at least a baseline of

496
00:32:13,960 --> 00:32:18,880
Speaker 2: what you know is not acceptable to you in this realm.

497
00:32:19,320 --> 00:32:22,160
Speaker 2: And you know, oh look it says okay, it says

498
00:32:22,160 --> 00:32:24,640
Speaker 2: he you're twenty one years old. You're thinking about getting

499
00:32:24,640 --> 00:32:27,400
Speaker 2: married to a guy that you met a month ago.

500
00:32:29,000 --> 00:32:34,080
Speaker 2: I mean, look, conventionally, I'm sure that everybody in your

501
00:32:34,160 --> 00:32:37,480
Speaker 2: life who you've discussed this with is totally telling you

502
00:32:39,680 --> 00:32:43,040
Speaker 2: that that is a terrible idea. Is that correct? Yeah?

503
00:32:43,080 --> 00:32:46,600
Speaker 2: Basically okay, And you know, I'm thinking about it. I'm

504
00:32:46,640 --> 00:32:49,719
Speaker 2: really thinking about I've been thinking so much lately about

505
00:32:50,320 --> 00:32:53,320
Speaker 2: what the point of fucking life is in general. Is

506
00:32:53,360 --> 00:32:55,840
Speaker 2: it to find love? Is it to love yourself? Is

507
00:32:55,880 --> 00:32:58,080
Speaker 2: it to have an impact on the world? Is it this?

508
00:32:58,320 --> 00:33:01,040
Speaker 2: Is it that every one really gets to kind of

509
00:33:01,080 --> 00:33:06,440
Speaker 2: decide in their own way what's important to them. And look,

510
00:33:06,480 --> 00:33:11,080
Speaker 2: you're twenty one years old, and really at this point,

511
00:33:11,680 --> 00:33:15,920
Speaker 2: the only way you could irreversibly change your life is

512
00:33:16,040 --> 00:33:21,800
Speaker 2: if you went to jail, or got pregnant or got

513
00:33:21,840 --> 00:33:27,160
Speaker 2: seriously injured. So look, if you want to go ahead

514
00:33:27,680 --> 00:33:32,760
Speaker 2: and marry this guy who you met a month ago,

515
00:33:34,480 --> 00:33:36,280
Speaker 2: I mean, look, is it a good idea? Isn't a

516
00:33:36,320 --> 00:33:38,600
Speaker 2: bad idea? What does that even mean? A good idea

517
00:33:38,720 --> 00:33:43,920
Speaker 2: or a bad idea? In in this case? I mean,

518
00:33:44,840 --> 00:33:47,440
Speaker 2: you kind of get to decide what's important to you, right,

519
00:33:47,520 --> 00:33:49,440
Speaker 2: And so you're here and you're deciding.

520
00:33:49,080 --> 00:33:52,600
Speaker 1: That love is important to you.

521
00:33:52,600 --> 00:33:55,440
Speaker 2: You're deciding that this connection is important to you, and

522
00:33:55,480 --> 00:33:58,120
Speaker 2: if you want to go ahead and map your actions

523
00:33:58,440 --> 00:34:00,400
Speaker 2: at this point in your life to what's important to

524
00:34:00,400 --> 00:34:03,960
Speaker 2: you right now, and then you know if later you

525
00:34:04,120 --> 00:34:08,719
Speaker 2: decide that, oh, that actually is not what's important to me, Oh,

526
00:34:08,760 --> 00:34:13,120
Speaker 2: this actually wasn't the great decision. You know, you can

527
00:34:13,200 --> 00:34:16,600
Speaker 2: change the course. So I don't think that you're about

528
00:34:16,640 --> 00:34:21,239
Speaker 2: to do anything that's completely irrational and crazy. Do I

529
00:34:21,280 --> 00:34:23,760
Speaker 2: personally believe that this is going to work out forever?

530
00:34:25,880 --> 00:34:28,320
Speaker 2: I don't fucking know. I'm sure that there are plenty

531
00:34:28,320 --> 00:34:31,400
Speaker 2: of people out there who've been in similar situations that

532
00:34:31,440 --> 00:34:34,560
Speaker 2: have made them very happy, and really, not me or

533
00:34:34,560 --> 00:34:37,400
Speaker 2: anyone else in your life can tell you for sure

534
00:34:37,960 --> 00:34:40,160
Speaker 2: whether or not this is going to work out. But

535
00:34:40,560 --> 00:34:45,000
Speaker 2: I think you should do you know, whatever maps to

536
00:34:45,040 --> 00:34:47,920
Speaker 2: what's important to you in life right now, and know

537
00:34:48,000 --> 00:34:51,959
Speaker 2: that if what's important to you changes later, then that's okay.

538
00:34:52,040 --> 00:34:53,600
Speaker 2: You can always change the course.

539
00:34:55,320 --> 00:34:57,080
Speaker 3: Yeah.

540
00:34:57,160 --> 00:34:57,680
Speaker 4: I like that.

541
00:35:00,560 --> 00:35:03,839
Speaker 2: I needed that, Adam. Is there anything else you want

542
00:35:03,880 --> 00:35:05,480
Speaker 2: to say to the people of the computer before.

543
00:35:05,200 --> 00:35:05,560
Speaker 3: We go.

544
00:35:10,360 --> 00:35:12,239
Speaker 4: Smunk a lot of weed? It'll help.

545
00:35:13,840 --> 00:35:15,200
Speaker 2: Thanks for calling, Autumn.

546
00:35:16,440 --> 00:35:21,880
Speaker 4: Of course, do you have a great one.

547
00:35:21,400 --> 00:35:23,360
Speaker 2: That was interesting. I feel like I'm about to repeat

548
00:35:23,400 --> 00:35:27,000
Speaker 2: everything I just said, but like, I've really been thinking

549
00:35:27,040 --> 00:35:30,000
Speaker 2: a lot about what the point, like I said, with

550
00:35:30,080 --> 00:35:34,440
Speaker 2: the fucking point of life is. And I have a

551
00:35:34,480 --> 00:35:39,920
Speaker 2: complicated relationship with relationships. We get a lot of relationship

552
00:35:40,080 --> 00:35:47,160
Speaker 2: stuff on this podcast. A lot of people having problems

553
00:35:47,360 --> 00:35:50,359
Speaker 2: or having whatever the opposite of problems are with their

554
00:35:50,440 --> 00:35:54,760
Speaker 2: romantic life. And some people's romantic lives make them very happy.

555
00:35:54,800 --> 00:36:00,919
Speaker 2: Some people's romantic lives make them very sad. But I mean, look,

556
00:36:00,960 --> 00:36:03,000
Speaker 2: if this girl goes and gets married to this guy,

557
00:36:03,719 --> 00:36:05,239
Speaker 2: if she has a kid with him, that's a whole

558
00:36:05,239 --> 00:36:06,919
Speaker 2: other thing. But if she just gets married to him,

559
00:36:08,840 --> 00:36:13,080
Speaker 2: uh fuck man, I don't know. Maybe it makes her happy,

560
00:36:13,120 --> 00:36:19,840
Speaker 2: maybe it doesn't. But if anything I think is important

561
00:36:19,840 --> 00:36:23,440
Speaker 2: for her to know is that she can always change

562
00:36:23,440 --> 00:36:28,040
Speaker 2: the course no matter what. So go with your gut.

563
00:36:28,480 --> 00:36:38,120
Speaker 2: I suppose I don't know. Hello, Hello, Hey is this Jordan?

564
00:36:39,680 --> 00:36:40,520
Speaker 3: They say, that's right?

565
00:36:42,239 --> 00:36:43,240
Speaker 2: What's going on, Jordan?

566
00:36:45,200 --> 00:36:50,080
Speaker 3: Nothing much? Just got off from a long day at work.

567
00:36:50,640 --> 00:36:51,880
Speaker 2: What do you do for work?

568
00:36:53,920 --> 00:36:56,799
Speaker 3: I actually work at a dispensary in Baltimore.

569
00:36:58,000 --> 00:36:59,799
Speaker 2: They have dispensaries in Baltimore.

570
00:37:01,320 --> 00:37:04,200
Speaker 3: Yes, it's a medical dispensary.

571
00:37:04,280 --> 00:37:06,759
Speaker 2: Holy shit, really, because how easy is it to get

572
00:37:06,800 --> 00:37:07,840
Speaker 2: the med card?

573
00:37:09,080 --> 00:37:11,600
Speaker 3: So it's honestly not that hard. You have to apply

574
00:37:11,680 --> 00:37:13,719
Speaker 3: through the state and like prove that you have a

575
00:37:13,760 --> 00:37:16,920
Speaker 3: medical need, and then once you apply with the state,

576
00:37:17,400 --> 00:37:20,160
Speaker 3: you go to a doctor and then get certified through them.

577
00:37:20,200 --> 00:37:23,040
Speaker 3: So it's like it's basically just a two part process

578
00:37:23,040 --> 00:37:24,000
Speaker 3: where you get pay twice.

579
00:37:24,760 --> 00:37:28,880
Speaker 2: What is the least severe medical issue I could claim

580
00:37:28,880 --> 00:37:30,719
Speaker 2: to have to get a med card to Maryland?

581
00:37:33,320 --> 00:37:36,200
Speaker 3: Honestly, I heard somebody just say back pain or headaches,

582
00:37:36,200 --> 00:37:41,440
Speaker 3: even if they haven't had it like consistently. It ranges,

583
00:37:41,560 --> 00:37:44,000
Speaker 3: But I think the least severe would either be like

584
00:37:45,080 --> 00:37:48,879
Speaker 3: consistent knee pain or something like back pain something like that.

585
00:37:50,920 --> 00:37:53,719
Speaker 2: Yeah. I guess they can't really make you prove a

586
00:37:53,760 --> 00:38:00,760
Speaker 2: headache because they can't like go into your head. Yeah, exactly, Jordan.

587
00:38:00,880 --> 00:38:04,319
Speaker 2: It says here that you're haunted by one of your

588
00:38:04,360 --> 00:38:06,480
Speaker 2: extra roommates. What's going on with this?

589
00:38:07,280 --> 00:38:12,279
Speaker 3: Yeah, So I had a friend from high school. We

590
00:38:12,320 --> 00:38:17,439
Speaker 3: had been friends for like ten years, and she when

591
00:38:17,480 --> 00:38:19,920
Speaker 3: I moved home from college, I had started dating. If

592
00:38:19,960 --> 00:38:22,880
Speaker 3: somebody moved in with them, we had been friends hanging

593
00:38:22,880 --> 00:38:26,880
Speaker 3: out like every couple of weekends here and there, and

594
00:38:26,920 --> 00:38:30,000
Speaker 3: when my ex and I broke up, I moved back

595
00:38:30,000 --> 00:38:32,359
Speaker 3: into my mom's like empty house for a little bit

596
00:38:32,440 --> 00:38:35,279
Speaker 3: before I like couch hopped for a bit, and she

597
00:38:35,480 --> 00:38:38,879
Speaker 3: proposed the idea that we get a place together. At

598
00:38:38,920 --> 00:38:41,600
Speaker 3: the time, she said she had an issue with her

599
00:38:41,640 --> 00:38:46,480
Speaker 3: social security and I believed her just because she was

600
00:38:46,520 --> 00:38:48,799
Speaker 3: a high school friend. We had been really close for

601
00:38:48,840 --> 00:38:52,080
Speaker 3: a while, so she said she couldn't get her name

602
00:38:52,200 --> 00:38:55,200
Speaker 3: on the leaf. So I was in a situation where

603
00:38:55,239 --> 00:38:57,400
Speaker 3: I didn't really have anywhere to go. At that point,

604
00:38:58,520 --> 00:39:02,160
Speaker 3: I took up a job at the teature and got

605
00:39:02,160 --> 00:39:06,880
Speaker 3: the apartment, and she said that she would pay in everything,

606
00:39:07,000 --> 00:39:09,360
Speaker 3: get her name Malise as soon as her social security

607
00:39:09,840 --> 00:39:13,719
Speaker 3: issue was cleared up. Six months into it, like she

608
00:39:13,840 --> 00:39:15,840
Speaker 3: moved in. I let her move in without giving me

609
00:39:15,960 --> 00:39:19,800
Speaker 3: anything to start, which was my mistake. I was too trusting,

610
00:39:21,440 --> 00:39:25,239
Speaker 3: and she immediately took the gym fobs. She wouldn't put

611
00:39:25,239 --> 00:39:28,000
Speaker 3: it back on the common hook. She took the mailbox key,

612
00:39:28,120 --> 00:39:31,200
Speaker 3: she wouldn't let me have that. It got to the

613
00:39:31,200 --> 00:39:33,799
Speaker 3: point where six months in she still owed me eight

614
00:39:33,880 --> 00:39:39,200
Speaker 3: hundred dollars, she wasn't really paying rent on time, and

615
00:39:39,280 --> 00:39:44,200
Speaker 3: her cats were tearing the apartment up. And then I

616
00:39:44,200 --> 00:39:47,120
Speaker 3: guess about four months before the end of the lease,

617
00:39:47,239 --> 00:39:51,200
Speaker 3: she had almost called off was paying me out. She

618
00:39:51,239 --> 00:39:54,480
Speaker 3: started acting really crazy, like I had surgery on the

619
00:39:54,520 --> 00:39:57,759
Speaker 3: back of my head, and my family was over and

620
00:39:58,239 --> 00:40:01,319
Speaker 3: she's fits saying they were too out and like how

621
00:40:01,400 --> 00:40:03,399
Speaker 3: dare we come into the apartment like that? And then

622
00:40:03,440 --> 00:40:06,279
Speaker 3: two nights later she had friends over until two in

623
00:40:06,280 --> 00:40:11,239
Speaker 3: the morning on a work night for me, and very

624
00:40:11,239 --> 00:40:14,239
Speaker 3: shortly thereafter, she moved all of her stuff out. She

625
00:40:14,360 --> 00:40:18,840
Speaker 3: stole my mail, a bunch of my stuff, and she

626
00:40:19,320 --> 00:40:22,239
Speaker 3: abandoned the so called lease, which her name really wasn't on.

627
00:40:22,560 --> 00:40:26,919
Speaker 3: I was just letting her learn. And then she used

628
00:40:26,920 --> 00:40:29,160
Speaker 3: the money that she should have paid rent with and

629
00:40:29,360 --> 00:40:34,040
Speaker 3: bought a new Cameron And she's continuing to take pictures

630
00:40:34,080 --> 00:40:39,320
Speaker 3: for all of our friends for like graduation, baby picture's

631
00:40:39,400 --> 00:40:41,480
Speaker 3: weddings with that money.

632
00:40:42,320 --> 00:40:44,799
Speaker 2: So how was this a two bedroom apartments and you

633
00:40:44,840 --> 00:40:46,440
Speaker 2: just put your name on the lease for the whole thing?

634
00:40:47,920 --> 00:40:48,800
Speaker 1: Yeah?

635
00:40:48,840 --> 00:40:50,240
Speaker 2: Did she ever pay you anything?

636
00:40:52,480 --> 00:40:52,719
Speaker 4: Yeah?

637
00:40:52,719 --> 00:40:56,000
Speaker 3: So she started paying me off the eight hundred initially,

638
00:40:56,360 --> 00:40:58,799
Speaker 3: and then she was she was still like owing me

639
00:40:58,840 --> 00:41:01,960
Speaker 3: like five hundred dollars, but she was paying ran consistently

640
00:41:02,040 --> 00:41:06,680
Speaker 3: for a bit. Then all of a sudden she stopped

641
00:41:06,680 --> 00:41:07,920
Speaker 3: paying and ditched.

642
00:41:09,400 --> 00:41:12,600
Speaker 2: Interesting, So, all right, tell me what was your relationship

643
00:41:12,719 --> 00:41:15,000
Speaker 2: like with this person before you moved in with her?

644
00:41:15,080 --> 00:41:17,360
Speaker 2: Were you guys friends for a long time?

645
00:41:19,120 --> 00:41:22,040
Speaker 3: Yeah? So we met in our freshman year of high school,

646
00:41:22,160 --> 00:41:25,000
Speaker 3: and we had been friends since then. She had been

647
00:41:25,040 --> 00:41:29,080
Speaker 3: friends over ten years and fifteen years ish, and we

648
00:41:29,200 --> 00:41:31,919
Speaker 3: had been like we were people who texted every day.

649
00:41:33,040 --> 00:41:35,000
Speaker 3: She was the person I would text and be like, Hey,

650
00:41:35,000 --> 00:41:36,520
Speaker 3: you want to go to Target. We'd jump in the

651
00:41:36,520 --> 00:41:39,080
Speaker 3: car run Target. Like. She was the person I went

652
00:41:39,120 --> 00:41:42,200
Speaker 3: and got groceries with. We're really close. I went to

653
00:41:42,239 --> 00:41:45,680
Speaker 3: all her family stuff. She called my brothers her brother

654
00:41:47,200 --> 00:41:50,080
Speaker 3: like very intertwined, like all of our friends were the same.

655
00:41:50,280 --> 00:41:53,320
Speaker 3: We were really close. And then it just flipped.

656
00:41:55,600 --> 00:41:59,440
Speaker 2: So over the course of your ten year friendship with her,

657
00:41:59,480 --> 00:42:01,160
Speaker 2: it says, you're you're twenty six, you know when you're

658
00:42:01,160 --> 00:42:07,880
Speaker 2: like sixteen. Has she done anything like this at all?

659
00:42:08,760 --> 00:42:12,240
Speaker 2: That found her character at all? This is the first

660
00:42:12,239 --> 00:42:15,200
Speaker 2: time she's she's she's kind of screwed you over.

661
00:42:16,680 --> 00:42:19,239
Speaker 3: This was the first time that she screwed me over.

662
00:42:19,440 --> 00:42:23,440
Speaker 3: But I think, like I think she had more so

663
00:42:23,520 --> 00:42:27,239
Speaker 3: screwed over like ex boyfriends, but never like friends or

664
00:42:27,280 --> 00:42:29,120
Speaker 3: anyone close to her.

665
00:42:30,120 --> 00:42:32,520
Speaker 2: Interesting, what do you what do you think it is

666
00:42:32,560 --> 00:42:37,680
Speaker 2: then that that caused this like shift in personality to

667
00:42:37,760 --> 00:42:38,520
Speaker 2: do this to you.

668
00:42:41,040 --> 00:42:45,480
Speaker 3: Honestly, So the teaching job I took, she encouraged me

669
00:42:45,600 --> 00:42:48,279
Speaker 3: to take that it was at the same school that

670
00:42:48,360 --> 00:42:50,400
Speaker 3: she was in, but she wasn't a teacher. She was

671
00:42:50,520 --> 00:42:52,800
Speaker 3: just an aide to one of the students in this school.

672
00:42:54,320 --> 00:42:57,319
Speaker 3: And I think that when I started doing well there

673
00:42:57,400 --> 00:43:00,759
Speaker 3: and really enjoying it, I don't know if she just

674
00:43:00,800 --> 00:43:03,520
Speaker 3: felt invaded by me working in the same place and

675
00:43:03,600 --> 00:43:05,680
Speaker 3: living with her, But again, she was the one who

676
00:43:05,760 --> 00:43:09,799
Speaker 3: proposed like living together after working together as well, So

677
00:43:10,200 --> 00:43:12,759
Speaker 3: I'm not sure what was going on there, But I

678
00:43:12,800 --> 00:43:16,000
Speaker 3: really do think it is either a jealousy aspect or

679
00:43:17,760 --> 00:43:19,719
Speaker 3: I or maybe she didn't have the money and she

680
00:43:19,880 --> 00:43:22,560
Speaker 3: just thought that I'd be a good person to drag

681
00:43:22,640 --> 00:43:27,160
Speaker 3: into it to take advantage of because a caring though.

682
00:43:27,840 --> 00:43:29,879
Speaker 2: You know, so in the past, like have there been

683
00:43:29,920 --> 00:43:33,120
Speaker 2: situations not where she's necessarily fucked you over, but where

684
00:43:33,440 --> 00:43:37,040
Speaker 2: You've been generous to her, and she's maybe taken advantage

685
00:43:37,080 --> 00:43:40,839
Speaker 2: of it, not that I.

686
00:43:40,760 --> 00:43:43,799
Speaker 3: Can recall honestly, Like it all really started when we

687
00:43:43,960 --> 00:43:47,680
Speaker 3: reconnected once I got back from like college, and after

688
00:43:47,880 --> 00:43:51,200
Speaker 3: the breakup and everything, it just she she really it

689
00:43:51,239 --> 00:43:54,600
Speaker 3: came out of nowhere. I mean, I know she had

690
00:43:54,640 --> 00:43:58,279
Speaker 3: some issues again with exes, but never with friends, and

691
00:43:58,320 --> 00:44:00,560
Speaker 3: she was always very consistent with friends usually.

692
00:44:01,520 --> 00:44:04,400
Speaker 2: And at the end of this, did she just completely

693
00:44:04,520 --> 00:44:09,640
Speaker 2: ghost you or was there a moment of explosive tension?

694
00:44:12,160 --> 00:44:14,799
Speaker 3: So she sent me a bunch of text messages and

695
00:44:15,040 --> 00:44:16,560
Speaker 3: basically told me that.

696
00:44:18,000 --> 00:44:19,319
Speaker 4: Like I was the.

697
00:44:19,200 --> 00:44:23,160
Speaker 3: Reason all this was happening, and that I was inconsiderate

698
00:44:23,200 --> 00:44:27,120
Speaker 3: of her. But I've reminded her again how I let

699
00:44:27,120 --> 00:44:29,640
Speaker 3: her move in without paying anything. I let her pets

700
00:44:29,680 --> 00:44:32,080
Speaker 3: live there when they weren't supposed to. She had people

701
00:44:32,160 --> 00:44:34,279
Speaker 3: over all the time. I really kept to myself, and

702
00:44:34,800 --> 00:44:37,880
Speaker 3: she was a very like as soon as anything happened

703
00:44:37,920 --> 00:44:40,080
Speaker 3: in the house, if anything was off, she would immediately

704
00:44:40,120 --> 00:44:43,080
Speaker 3: blow up. So I actually, for the entire period of

705
00:44:43,080 --> 00:44:44,920
Speaker 3: living there, wouldn't even go in the kitchen, Like I

706
00:44:45,040 --> 00:44:48,720
Speaker 3: never cooked there once because I was afraid of anything

707
00:44:49,320 --> 00:44:52,160
Speaker 3: like going wrong with her because she just had a temper.

708
00:44:53,080 --> 00:44:59,360
Speaker 2: Nothing really just fucking ruins a friendship more than living together.

709
00:45:00,200 --> 00:45:03,080
Speaker 2: I've really just found then that to be true.

710
00:45:04,280 --> 00:45:06,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, I definitely regret that for sure.

711
00:45:07,440 --> 00:45:09,720
Speaker 2: Yeah, so do you talk to her at all? Still?

712
00:45:11,560 --> 00:45:11,680
Speaker 5: No?

713
00:45:11,880 --> 00:45:15,319
Speaker 3: So she blocked me on everything immediately following that, Like

714
00:45:15,360 --> 00:45:17,759
Speaker 3: she literally took my mail and I had to call

715
00:45:17,840 --> 00:45:20,279
Speaker 3: it the post office and they did a search and

716
00:45:20,280 --> 00:45:23,799
Speaker 3: they actually found it at her own like where she

717
00:45:24,200 --> 00:45:26,480
Speaker 3: was living at the time. I guess where she had

718
00:45:26,520 --> 00:45:29,000
Speaker 3: moved and like, oh, yeah, your old roommate had your mail.

719
00:45:30,360 --> 00:45:32,160
Speaker 3: And I still have things like missing to this day

720
00:45:32,200 --> 00:45:33,960
Speaker 3: that I can't find that I know she took. But

721
00:45:34,680 --> 00:45:37,400
Speaker 3: I've seen my brother has seen her. She goes into

722
00:45:37,400 --> 00:45:41,120
Speaker 3: the jet's office that he works at, but she will

723
00:45:41,120 --> 00:45:45,520
Speaker 3: be real friendly with him, say hi. Nothing else. Nobody

724
00:45:45,560 --> 00:45:48,560
Speaker 3: else really seems to see her besides, like my teacher

725
00:45:48,600 --> 00:45:50,840
Speaker 3: friends still get photos done by her and everything.

726
00:45:51,480 --> 00:45:53,640
Speaker 2: Are is any part of you going to attempt to

727
00:45:53,840 --> 00:45:57,040
Speaker 2: go after her legally or just try to find her

728
00:45:57,080 --> 00:46:00,799
Speaker 2: and be like, hey, you owe me these things or

729
00:46:00,960 --> 00:46:02,680
Speaker 2: you know you don't have my stuff.

730
00:46:02,800 --> 00:46:07,840
Speaker 3: I thought about it, like right now, I have a

731
00:46:07,840 --> 00:46:10,920
Speaker 3: lot like going on health wise and like stress wise

732
00:46:11,000 --> 00:46:13,120
Speaker 3: that I don't know if I could handle the additional

733
00:46:13,160 --> 00:46:18,680
Speaker 3: stressor of it. But if it's given the opportunity when

734
00:46:18,719 --> 00:46:21,640
Speaker 3: I'm a little bit more like stable, then I would

735
00:46:21,680 --> 00:46:24,160
Speaker 3: love to figure out my options with that, whether it

736
00:46:24,239 --> 00:46:27,520
Speaker 3: be like small Quan's cord or I don't know what

737
00:46:27,560 --> 00:46:30,120
Speaker 3: that would be. But she's like, because of her, I

738
00:46:30,200 --> 00:46:33,680
Speaker 3: fell for a scammer. I'm like over seventy five one

739
00:46:33,719 --> 00:46:37,160
Speaker 3: hundred dollars in debt because of it. Like I just,

740
00:46:37,360 --> 00:46:39,520
Speaker 3: I was so desperate to pay off my debt that

741
00:46:39,560 --> 00:46:42,719
Speaker 3: I became even more in debt. So I just I'm

742
00:46:42,840 --> 00:46:46,600
Speaker 3: gonna stay under the radar for a bit until things

743
00:46:46,640 --> 00:46:47,120
Speaker 3: clear up.

744
00:46:48,320 --> 00:46:50,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, no, dude, I feel you. I feel it. I

745
00:46:50,400 --> 00:46:58,080
Speaker 2: feel you when like the going after a conflict or

746
00:46:58,280 --> 00:47:04,520
Speaker 2: or going after retribute becomes more of a of an

747
00:47:04,560 --> 00:47:07,480
Speaker 2: issue than than to just let it be, you know,

748
00:47:07,760 --> 00:47:10,760
Speaker 2: especially because it is it's taxing to hire a lawyer,

749
00:47:11,000 --> 00:47:14,160
Speaker 2: go to the core, gather your evidence, like really build

750
00:47:14,160 --> 00:47:16,879
Speaker 2: a case, do the things. It's a whole fucking thing.

751
00:47:17,520 --> 00:47:22,320
Speaker 2: And I can totally understand weighing that against just dropping

752
00:47:22,360 --> 00:47:26,680
Speaker 2: it and finding that dropping it is is better for

753
00:47:26,760 --> 00:47:29,600
Speaker 2: your piece. I understand where that decision comes from. I

754
00:47:29,600 --> 00:47:32,560
Speaker 2: wanted to ask you, how do you feel? Are you

755
00:47:32,640 --> 00:47:35,759
Speaker 2: in like a mourning feeling at all? I mean a

756
00:47:35,880 --> 00:47:40,920
Speaker 2: ten year friendship that ends like this just out of nowhere?

757
00:47:41,000 --> 00:47:43,799
Speaker 2: Like how how does that feel? How are you what's

758
00:47:43,800 --> 00:47:44,960
Speaker 2: going through your head about that?

759
00:47:47,560 --> 00:47:47,840
Speaker 4: Yeah?

760
00:47:48,320 --> 00:47:51,120
Speaker 3: From all of this, Like I honestly, this is something

761
00:47:51,160 --> 00:47:55,120
Speaker 3: that literally haunted me day to day, like me thinking

762
00:47:55,120 --> 00:47:58,720
Speaker 3: about like what did I do wrong? Like uh, going

763
00:47:58,760 --> 00:48:01,360
Speaker 3: over why I let her come in in the first

764
00:48:01,360 --> 00:48:04,319
Speaker 3: place without paying things, like going over every action and

765
00:48:04,360 --> 00:48:08,080
Speaker 3: every thought based off of that, and then like moving

766
00:48:08,120 --> 00:48:11,120
Speaker 3: forward thinking about my interactions with people. It kind of

767
00:48:11,840 --> 00:48:13,600
Speaker 3: I mean, it really does haunt me because I just

768
00:48:13,680 --> 00:48:16,799
Speaker 3: don't know who I can trust. I mean I've met

769
00:48:16,800 --> 00:48:20,840
Speaker 3: some really great people since they then, who understand and

770
00:48:20,920 --> 00:48:24,040
Speaker 3: are a lot better friends than her. If I see

771
00:48:24,080 --> 00:48:26,759
Speaker 3: any kind of sketchy behavior, I tend to dip out

772
00:48:26,840 --> 00:48:32,520
Speaker 3: very quickly now. But yeah, it's constant anxiety from from that.

773
00:48:33,880 --> 00:48:35,920
Speaker 2: So you're saying that this is so you're saying that

774
00:48:35,960 --> 00:48:39,080
Speaker 2: this is this is influenced, you know, not just your

775
00:48:39,120 --> 00:48:44,200
Speaker 2: relationship with this person, but just your overall trust levels

776
00:48:44,920 --> 00:48:47,840
Speaker 2: and weariness of being taken advantage of in general.

777
00:48:49,680 --> 00:48:52,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, because I mean, again, this is somebody that I

778
00:48:52,160 --> 00:48:54,440
Speaker 3: let into my family, Like she came to all of

779
00:48:54,480 --> 00:48:57,680
Speaker 3: the family birthday party, she came on vacations with us,

780
00:48:57,719 --> 00:49:02,000
Speaker 3: like that was a long friendship. And she watched another

781
00:49:02,080 --> 00:49:06,440
Speaker 3: one of our high school friendships dissolve and was like that,

782
00:49:06,520 --> 00:49:08,600
Speaker 3: I'd never want that to happen to us. So that's

783
00:49:08,640 --> 00:49:13,239
Speaker 3: something that I thought would never happen. But again, like that,

784
00:49:13,360 --> 00:49:15,359
Speaker 3: that's what threw me off so much because of that

785
00:49:15,480 --> 00:49:17,799
Speaker 3: was something I never in a million years. Guest, we

786
00:49:17,840 --> 00:49:21,719
Speaker 3: had literally like not on purpose, but we accidentally have

787
00:49:21,880 --> 00:49:24,920
Speaker 3: matching tattoos because I got mine from my grandmother who

788
00:49:25,000 --> 00:49:26,839
Speaker 3: was born on Saint Pathrick' Day and she was born

789
00:49:26,840 --> 00:49:30,360
Speaker 3: on Saint Patrick's Day. So yeah, like we have tattoos

790
00:49:30,400 --> 00:49:31,040
Speaker 3: that are matching.

791
00:49:32,160 --> 00:49:34,680
Speaker 2: Well well, Jordan, Yeah, it's it's just I mean, this

792
00:49:34,760 --> 00:49:37,800
Speaker 2: is an interesting thing because it's like, on one hand,

793
00:49:38,239 --> 00:49:45,160
Speaker 2: if for you, being generous, being trusting is just important

794
00:49:45,200 --> 00:49:50,880
Speaker 2: to you as you move through life, I feel like it's, yes,

795
00:49:51,320 --> 00:49:55,520
Speaker 2: it's you know, important to stay true to that, but

796
00:49:55,600 --> 00:49:57,839
Speaker 2: it's hard, it's very hard to balance that with Yeah,

797
00:49:57,840 --> 00:49:59,600
Speaker 2: it's important to me to be trusting and generous to

798
00:49:59,640 --> 00:50:01,799
Speaker 2: people to one of my values. But also I don't

799
00:50:01,840 --> 00:50:05,200
Speaker 2: want to get fucked you know. Yeah, it's really hard.

800
00:50:05,239 --> 00:50:05,520
Speaker 4: It's hard.

801
00:50:05,560 --> 00:50:07,239
Speaker 2: It's hard to balance that, it really is. I don't

802
00:50:07,239 --> 00:50:10,839
Speaker 2: have a solution for that, but I you know, at

803
00:50:10,840 --> 00:50:14,000
Speaker 2: the end of the day, you know, it's good that

804
00:50:14,080 --> 00:50:18,400
Speaker 2: your your it's it's nice that you have that generous spirit,

805
00:50:18,920 --> 00:50:23,480
Speaker 2: and I hope that you find a way to continue

806
00:50:23,520 --> 00:50:29,080
Speaker 2: to tap into that in but in uh in in

807
00:50:29,080 --> 00:50:33,759
Speaker 2: in maybe more calculated ways then letting people live with

808
00:50:33,800 --> 00:50:35,120
Speaker 2: you without being on the lease.

809
00:50:37,160 --> 00:50:38,000
Speaker 4: Yeah, definitely.

810
00:50:38,080 --> 00:50:41,000
Speaker 3: And Hey, I'm gonna try to come see you in

811
00:50:41,120 --> 00:50:43,279
Speaker 3: d C. So I hope to see you soon. I

812
00:50:43,360 --> 00:50:45,520
Speaker 3: really appreciate you taking my call and everything too.

813
00:50:46,040 --> 00:50:48,680
Speaker 2: Yeah, thank you for sharing your story. And I'm hot

814
00:50:48,800 --> 00:50:51,279
Speaker 2: fucking ce in d C too. That'll be that'll be

815
00:50:51,360 --> 00:50:54,239
Speaker 2: crazy with the Miracle Theater, four hundred people. You can

816
00:50:54,320 --> 00:50:57,360
Speaker 2: you can watch me ship my fucking pants directly on

817
00:50:57,400 --> 00:50:58,400
Speaker 2: the stage as I.

818
00:50:58,480 --> 00:51:03,280
Speaker 3: Walk out right there with you, So prep yourself.

819
00:51:04,120 --> 00:51:05,279
Speaker 2: Is there anything else you want to say to the

820
00:51:05,280 --> 00:51:07,200
Speaker 2: people of the computer before we go, Jordan.

821
00:51:08,760 --> 00:51:12,239
Speaker 3: No, everybody, have a good night, stay chill, have a

822
00:51:12,239 --> 00:51:12,640
Speaker 3: good night.

823
00:51:13,320 --> 00:51:14,120
Speaker 2: Thanks calling.

824
00:51:15,600 --> 00:51:16,680
Speaker 3: Thanks gat kind of good night.

825
00:51:19,000 --> 00:51:21,759
Speaker 2: Yes, an interesting one. I've dealt with shit like that

826
00:51:21,800 --> 00:51:23,760
Speaker 2: all the like, not dealt with but like I should,

827
00:51:23,800 --> 00:51:26,840
Speaker 2: I guess possibly sometimes dealt with personally, but gotten calls

828
00:51:26,920 --> 00:51:29,080
Speaker 2: like that a lot where somebody does something nice and

829
00:51:29,120 --> 00:51:32,600
Speaker 2: then fucking backfires on them. And I'm trying to think like,

830
00:51:32,880 --> 00:51:35,520
Speaker 2: because you can go to two ways with that, where

831
00:51:35,560 --> 00:51:37,919
Speaker 2: you can go, Okay, I'm never gonna do anything nice

832
00:51:37,920 --> 00:51:39,960
Speaker 2: for anyone ever again because the last time I did,

833
00:51:39,960 --> 00:51:42,440
Speaker 2: I got fucked over and I'm just done. Or you

834
00:51:42,480 --> 00:51:46,640
Speaker 2: can be like, you know what, actually fuck them because

835
00:51:46,680 --> 00:51:50,040
Speaker 2: they're trying to get me. They win if I do that.

836
00:51:50,840 --> 00:51:54,759
Speaker 2: You know, if I stop being nice to people because

837
00:51:54,800 --> 00:51:57,279
Speaker 2: this one person fucks me over, then they win. I'm

838
00:51:57,320 --> 00:51:59,680
Speaker 2: not giving this person the power to change my character

839
00:51:59,719 --> 00:52:03,320
Speaker 2: toe how I interact with people. I don't think either

840
00:52:03,360 --> 00:52:08,120
Speaker 2: of those two options is the wrong one, but it's

841
00:52:08,160 --> 00:52:11,040
Speaker 2: interesting to think about because I I really don't know.

842
00:52:11,080 --> 00:52:18,560
Speaker 2: It's a tough situation. Hello, Hello, how's it going.

843
00:52:19,000 --> 00:52:20,560
Speaker 5: I'm doing well? How are you wile?

844
00:52:22,160 --> 00:52:24,120
Speaker 2: I am okay? What's going on with you?

845
00:52:25,400 --> 00:52:28,480
Speaker 5: Heck yeah, doing good, feeling good? It's got all A

846
00:52:28,520 --> 00:52:31,000
Speaker 5: bike run by I mean, it's not a run. I'm

847
00:52:31,000 --> 00:52:32,640
Speaker 5: on a bike, so using a bike.

848
00:52:34,040 --> 00:52:38,560
Speaker 2: Okay, that made a little bit of sense. What's is

849
00:52:38,560 --> 00:52:40,560
Speaker 2: there anything in particularly calls that you talk about.

850
00:52:42,640 --> 00:52:47,920
Speaker 5: Oh yeah, I mean a particular scenario that I found myself.

851
00:52:48,040 --> 00:52:50,439
Speaker 5: I mean, I've been dating this girl for a while,

852
00:52:51,239 --> 00:52:56,000
Speaker 5: it's like four weeks about a month, really cool, kicking

853
00:52:56,040 --> 00:52:58,400
Speaker 5: it off, been having a good time. But every so

854
00:52:58,560 --> 00:53:01,000
Speaker 5: often we hang out, ends up bringing up that she

855
00:53:01,040 --> 00:53:06,080
Speaker 5: wants to punch my balls, and like, at first it

856
00:53:06,120 --> 00:53:08,759
Speaker 5: was like, oh, okay, ha, like it's funny, like so

857
00:53:08,920 --> 00:53:12,799
Speaker 5: with the demeanor, the delivery awesome. But it's consistently being

858
00:53:12,800 --> 00:53:16,760
Speaker 5: brought up each time we hang out, and I'm unclear

859
00:53:16,760 --> 00:53:19,480
Speaker 5: on whether I should be concerned of a surprise attack

860
00:53:19,600 --> 00:53:23,040
Speaker 5: or she'll respect my boundaries and say until I'm ready

861
00:53:23,040 --> 00:53:23,680
Speaker 5: for such things.

862
00:53:25,960 --> 00:53:28,080
Speaker 2: Okay, you're concerned about whether or not she will just

863
00:53:28,120 --> 00:53:30,480
Speaker 2: surprise attack your balls.

864
00:53:31,680 --> 00:53:34,640
Speaker 5: I mean that, and also just to carry the amount

865
00:53:34,680 --> 00:53:39,480
Speaker 5: of the amount of want to put such an action

866
00:53:39,760 --> 00:53:40,400
Speaker 5: into effect.

867
00:53:41,600 --> 00:53:45,239
Speaker 2: Okay, I mean, have you expressed to her that you

868
00:53:45,280 --> 00:53:49,200
Speaker 2: do not want her to to punch you in the balls?

869
00:53:51,120 --> 00:53:54,920
Speaker 5: Oh definitely, yeah. Yeah, It's like, yeah, I'll say I'll

870
00:53:54,960 --> 00:53:56,359
Speaker 5: let her. I told her. I was like, Man, until

871
00:53:56,400 --> 00:53:58,560
Speaker 5: I feel I'm ready, I'll let you know for sure.

872
00:53:59,200 --> 00:54:02,600
Speaker 5: Although John, a little surprise attack I'm having me on the.

873
00:54:03,680 --> 00:54:09,359
Speaker 2: Yeah, John, have you told her that makes you uncomfortable

874
00:54:09,440 --> 00:54:11,360
Speaker 2: when she asks you to punch your balls?

875
00:54:13,840 --> 00:54:14,760
Speaker 3: Uh?

876
00:54:15,239 --> 00:54:18,560
Speaker 5: I don't. I don't know if I'm like totally put

877
00:54:18,600 --> 00:54:20,480
Speaker 5: off because I enjoy hanging out with her.

878
00:54:20,960 --> 00:54:23,680
Speaker 2: John, you're calling a gecko on the internet to tell

879
00:54:23,760 --> 00:54:27,040
Speaker 2: him that you're uncomfortable with this girl, Uh, saying that

880
00:54:28,000 --> 00:54:30,520
Speaker 2: she wants to punch your balls?

881
00:54:34,440 --> 00:54:36,520
Speaker 5: Yeah? Yeah, I don't want my balls punched.

882
00:54:37,080 --> 00:54:41,960
Speaker 2: Okay, So you so have you really? Yeah? Have you?

883
00:54:42,000 --> 00:54:47,440
Speaker 2: Have you really honestly expressed this to her honestly?

884
00:54:47,520 --> 00:54:51,279
Speaker 5: Like sit down and be like a yo, like I

885
00:54:51,280 --> 00:54:53,680
Speaker 5: don't know if Oh no, I don't know. I definitely

886
00:54:53,760 --> 00:54:55,719
Speaker 5: know that I don't want you to punch me in

887
00:54:55,719 --> 00:54:58,319
Speaker 5: the balls right now, and so I hope you can

888
00:54:58,360 --> 00:55:02,840
Speaker 5: respect that. And I'm sure she could, although like anyone

889
00:55:02,920 --> 00:55:05,840
Speaker 5: else with such a desire, it's still gonna sit in

890
00:55:05,840 --> 00:55:09,640
Speaker 5: the back. So it's just like keeping me all my

891
00:55:09,680 --> 00:55:12,080
Speaker 5: toes is all, keeping me all my toes with it.

892
00:55:12,560 --> 00:55:15,279
Speaker 5: I'm sure she could respect it. Although it's like mm hmm,

893
00:55:15,800 --> 00:55:23,359
Speaker 5: there's definitely a good want to do it for sure, John.

894
00:55:24,200 --> 00:55:26,680
Speaker 5: I mean, as a gecko, do you get hit in

895
00:55:26,719 --> 00:55:28,040
Speaker 5: the ball? I don't know about the getto.

896
00:55:27,840 --> 00:55:32,319
Speaker 2: Thing, John, John, are you are you genuinely afraid that

897
00:55:32,360 --> 00:55:34,520
Speaker 2: this girl is gonna punch you in the balls?

898
00:55:37,280 --> 00:55:38,479
Speaker 5: I'm concerned for sure.

899
00:55:43,840 --> 00:55:50,080
Speaker 2: If she does not respect the boundaries that you have

900
00:55:50,200 --> 00:55:56,960
Speaker 2: set between her fists and your balls. Mm hmm, then

901
00:55:57,200 --> 00:55:59,959
Speaker 2: then she is not the one for you, John.

902
00:56:04,480 --> 00:56:09,200
Speaker 5: Okay, No, yeah, definitely that's a good it's a good

903
00:56:09,200 --> 00:56:10,719
Speaker 5: way of putting it. I just hardly. I just think

904
00:56:10,760 --> 00:56:13,480
Speaker 5: it's someone you're just telling me wholesomely of such a

905
00:56:14,080 --> 00:56:16,080
Speaker 5: scenario because he's trying to bring it up like ha

906
00:56:16,080 --> 00:56:17,920
Speaker 5: ha ha. But no one's like a yo.

907
00:56:18,800 --> 00:56:21,360
Speaker 2: No, no, no, this is you're and you're you're like

908
00:56:21,520 --> 00:56:24,560
Speaker 2: passing this off as a joke, but you are you're

909
00:56:24,600 --> 00:56:32,120
Speaker 2: afraid that this woman is going to find the balls? Yeah, okay,

910
00:56:32,680 --> 00:56:35,439
Speaker 2: beyond just be honest with her, John, tell her that

911
00:56:36,320 --> 00:56:39,480
Speaker 2: you will never be interested in that. Tell her stop

912
00:56:39,480 --> 00:56:48,600
Speaker 2: bringing it up, and hopefully she will. Then you know,

913
00:56:48,600 --> 00:56:50,719
Speaker 2: you reevaluate the relationship.

914
00:56:52,680 --> 00:56:56,040
Speaker 5: Most definitely, and it's a good portion of time to

915
00:56:56,080 --> 00:56:59,160
Speaker 5: do that, you know, month in gouts sem my boundaries

916
00:56:59,200 --> 00:57:08,560
Speaker 5: right away, Yes you do. Yeah, thank you John.

917
00:57:08,600 --> 00:57:09,680
Speaker 2: Is there anything else you want to like?

918
00:57:10,080 --> 00:57:11,520
Speaker 5: Ultimately good?

919
00:57:11,840 --> 00:57:12,960
Speaker 2: Is there anything else you want to say to the people

920
00:57:12,960 --> 00:57:13,759
Speaker 2: of the computer before we go?

921
00:57:16,520 --> 00:57:21,400
Speaker 5: Mm hmm that I feel like you don't get enough

922
00:57:21,440 --> 00:57:24,960
Speaker 5: credit for how handsome you are ultomely.

923
00:57:25,640 --> 00:57:27,880
Speaker 2: That's very sweet that you say, especially as a good group.

924
00:57:28,600 --> 00:57:29,240
Speaker 2: Thank you, ma'am.

925
00:57:31,360 --> 00:57:38,560
Speaker 5: Of course, and thank you. Take care of John, you too,

926
00:57:38,680 --> 00:57:39,959
Speaker 5: have a good night, love, bye bye.

927
00:57:41,120 --> 00:57:43,000
Speaker 2: John said he was twenty six on the call screen.

928
00:57:43,040 --> 00:57:47,120
Speaker 2: Anything he is not twenty six. Maybe he is. I

929
00:57:47,160 --> 00:57:48,280
Speaker 2: don't know. I don't know why I said that. I

930
00:57:48,280 --> 00:57:50,160
Speaker 2: don't know what a twenty six year old sounds like.

931
00:57:51,320 --> 00:57:55,040
Speaker 5: EVERYTHNK goes on the line taking your phone calls.

932
00:57:54,840 --> 00:57:59,919
Speaker 2: Every nine ever goes and I'm just teaching you the line.

933
00:58:00,320 --> 00:58:00,880
Speaker 2: But he's not

934
00:58:01,120 --> 00:58:03,600
Speaker 5: Really an expert though,