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Speaker 1: It is time now for today's Strawberry Letter, and if

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Speaker 1: you need advice on relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting, and more,

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Speaker 1: please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HAARVIFM dot com

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Speaker 1: and click submit Strawberry Letter. We could be reading your

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Speaker 1: letter live on the air, just like we're going to

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Speaker 1: read this one right here, right now, and you never know,

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Speaker 1: it could be yours. Get up, Steve, it.

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Speaker 2: Could be yours. Bugle love and hold on time. We

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Speaker 2: got it for you here it is Strawberry.

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Speaker 1: Let up, you're all lounging. Thank you, nephew. Subject why

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Speaker 1: can't he talk around me? Dear Stephen Shirley, I'm engaged

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Speaker 1: to a man that never talks on the phone around me.

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Speaker 1: He won't answer the phone in my presence and he

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Speaker 1: barely texts around me. In the beginning of our courtship,

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Speaker 1: I used to be on the phone all the time,

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Speaker 1: either facetiming my mom or scrolling on social media. He

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Speaker 1: cut all of that out and said we need to

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Speaker 1: be intentional with our time together. He used to come

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Speaker 1: over to my house and leave his phone in the

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Speaker 1: kitchen so it didn't disturb us, and I love that

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Speaker 1: about him. In the past few months, he switched up

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Speaker 1: his phone habits. When he gets to my house, he's

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Speaker 1: always on the phone. He gets off as soon as

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Speaker 1: he pulls up in my driveway. I've been outside and

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Speaker 1: seen it with my own eyes. If he takes a

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Speaker 1: call while we're out, he walks away to talk on

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Speaker 1: the phone and then hangs up before he comes back

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Speaker 1: to the table. We've spent a lot of nights together

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Speaker 1: and his phone is nowhere to be found when I'm

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Speaker 1: at his house. Like I said, I thought it was

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Speaker 1: sweet at first, but after two years of dating, it's

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Speaker 1: totally fine to be on the phone around me. His

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Speaker 1: mom is fussed at him for not taking her calls.

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Speaker 1: If I want to talk to his parents, he'll tell

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Speaker 1: me to call them on my own time. I don't

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Speaker 1: want to create drama where there is none, but you

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Speaker 1: have to admit that it's strange that my fiance gets

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Speaker 1: off the phone whenever he pulls up to my house,

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Speaker 1: and he gets back on the phone when he's pulling

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Speaker 1: out of my driveway. It makes me think that he's

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Speaker 1: hiding something from me. I would go through his phone,

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Speaker 1: but I never know where he's hiding it. I'm also

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Speaker 1: scared of what I might find out. How can we

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Speaker 1: be married if he can't talk to his friends and

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Speaker 1: family around me. Yeah, Well, whoever he's talking to and

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Speaker 1: whatever they're talking about, he doesn't want you to know

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Speaker 1: or he doesn't want you to hear it. Before when

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Speaker 1: you guys, like you said, were just starting out and

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Speaker 1: all of that, he wanted you to be intentional. He

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Speaker 1: didn't want you to be on the phone, and he

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Speaker 1: didn't want to be on the phone. He left his

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Speaker 1: phone in the kitchen. So I say, yeah, he is

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Speaker 1: hiding something, which should not be the case since you

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Speaker 1: guys are engaged and you have been for two years

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Speaker 1: and you should be getting married soon. You already know

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Speaker 1: this is no way to start off a marriage. There

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Speaker 1: are just too many secrets going on, and this is

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Speaker 1: one thing that you really don't like. I say, there

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Speaker 1: is something he's hiding and he doesn't care how it

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Speaker 1: makes you feel. At this point, marriage is also about trust.

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Speaker 1: You know that, and what he's doing is making you

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Speaker 1: lose trust in him. You need to really look at

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Speaker 1: him and consider what your relationship and marriage is gonna

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Speaker 1: look like. If he's doing it now, he's not going

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Speaker 1: to change. He'll do it when you guys get married,

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Speaker 1: you're not gonna want your husband talking in secret around you.

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Speaker 1: So you got to think about this before you walk

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Speaker 1: down that aisle.

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Speaker 3: Steve, Wow, lady, you know I try to defend me

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Speaker 3: in when I can. I really do, because sometimes you

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Speaker 3: all go off on tangents that have no factual bearing

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Speaker 3: at all. You're going off on something that happened in

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Speaker 3: your past and you break that baggage into the relationship

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Speaker 3: and all of a sudden, every man is just like that.

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Speaker 2: And that's not the case. However, But when you.

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Speaker 3: Write a letter and I'm trying to find you know what,

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Speaker 3: let me help you. We'll always try to find the

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Speaker 3: redeeming quality in a man. If you don't mention any

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Speaker 3: redeeming qualities, then you give me nothing to fight with.

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Speaker 3: I want to try to help save relationships because a

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Speaker 3: lot of people break up too early.

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Speaker 2: It's just really a factual fact.

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Speaker 3: Now, because it's Instagram, instant coffee, instant relationships, I get

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Speaker 3: on this app and I'll find somebody. Oh no, you're

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Speaker 3: not know you not all right? So let me try

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Speaker 3: to help. Why can't he talk around me? Let me

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Speaker 3: just answer that question first, because he don't want you

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Speaker 3: to hear what he said. That's why there are conversations

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Speaker 3: I cannot have around Marjorie.

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Speaker 2: I just can't because.

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Speaker 3: There's some stuff I'm saying to my dudes that she

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Speaker 3: really don't need to hear. Because as dudes, we have

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Speaker 3: a certain way we talk around each other, and it's

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Speaker 3: acceptable and politically correct in our circle, but in the

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Speaker 3: general public, I could get canceled for now every conversation

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Speaker 3: I ever had with my dudes that I grew up with,

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Speaker 3: because we don't have a cancelation culture. From one hundred

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Speaker 3: and twelfth Street. We boys, We them boys, and that's

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Speaker 3: how we talk. So I've gotten that out the way.

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Speaker 3: I can't say this one I'm talking about my relationship

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Speaker 3: me and my friends because I can't hear. I can't

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Speaker 3: say he won't answer the phone in my prison. He

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Speaker 3: badly texts around me. In the beginning of our courtship,

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Speaker 3: I used to be on the phone all the time,

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Speaker 3: and he said we had to be more intentional with

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Speaker 3: our time together. He used to come over to my

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Speaker 3: house and leave his phone in the kitchen so it

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Speaker 3: didn't disturb us, and I loved that about him. The

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Speaker 3: past few months, though, he just switched up these habits.

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Speaker 2: He gets to my house, he's always on the phone.

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Speaker 3: He gets off soon as he pull up in my

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Speaker 3: driveway and I'm outside, I'd have seen it with my

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Speaker 3: own eyes.

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Speaker 2: If you take a.

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Speaker 3: Car while we out, he'll walk away, talk on the phone,

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Speaker 3: then hang up for he come back to the table.

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Speaker 3: We just spend a whole lot of nights together and

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Speaker 3: his phone is nowhere to be found when I'm at

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Speaker 3: his house. That means you have looked for it. Nowhere

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Speaker 3: to be fine, But where is this phone at? I

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Speaker 3: think it's outside in the truck, That's.

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Speaker 2: What I think it is.

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Speaker 3: Hangu been out to the garage. Have you checked the

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Speaker 3: back of the toolbox.

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Speaker 1: We'll have part two of your response coming up at

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Speaker 1: twenty three minutes after the hour today.

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Speaker 2: Under behind the paper times.

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Speaker 1: Why can't he talk around me? We'll get back into

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Speaker 1: it right after this. You're listening Steve Harvey Morning Show.

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Speaker 4: make that house a home. Now, all that effort has

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Speaker 4: built something hugely valuable. Equity is the portion of your

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Speaker 1: Come on Steve Let's recap today's strawberry letter. The subject

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Speaker 1: is why can he talk around me?

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Speaker 3: Here's the problem with this whole letter. They have been

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Speaker 3: dating for two years. She says she is his fiance,

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Speaker 3: and why can't he talk around me? Number one cause

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Speaker 3: you don't need to hear what he's saying. Number two,

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Speaker 3: he's having conversations that you may not approve of.

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Speaker 2: Number three. This isn't the hard one for women.

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Speaker 3: This is number three, ladies, It ain't your business.

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Speaker 2: That's a hard one.

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Speaker 3: That's a hard one, hard hard one. So now let's

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Speaker 3: move on. When he used to come over to the house,

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Speaker 3: he would leave his phone in the kitchen, said, our

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Speaker 3: time with each other needs to be more intentional. He

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Speaker 3: stopped you from social media, talking on the phone and

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Speaker 3: going on Instagram, and you love that about him.

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Speaker 2: Well, he has switched.

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Speaker 3: Up now when he come over to your house, you

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Speaker 3: see him on the phone. You be in the driveway.

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Speaker 3: He get off the phone soon as he get there.

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Speaker 3: Y'all spend a lot of nights together, and you can't

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Speaker 3: find his phone nowhere.

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Speaker 2: Something is on this phone.

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Speaker 5: Something is being said into the mouthpiece of his phone

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Speaker 5: and coming out the ear hole on this phone that

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Speaker 5: you cannot be privy to.

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Speaker 2: Period. So we have this letter that has.

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Speaker 3: A question, why can't he talk around Well, lady, why

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Speaker 3: you think he's talking on you? You say, but after two

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Speaker 3: years of dating, it's totally fine to be on the

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Speaker 3: phone around me. His mam has fusted him for not

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Speaker 3: taking her calls. Now let me let me now, let's

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Speaker 3: let's take that line right there. His mama and fussed

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Speaker 3: at him for not taking her calls. Now, let's go

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Speaker 3: down to the bottom of the line, bottom of the house.

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Speaker 3: You said, how can we be married if he can't

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Speaker 3: talk to his friends and his family around me? Let

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Speaker 3: me just put it to you out here, point blake,

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Speaker 3: Because he ain't talking to his friends and he already

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Speaker 3: don't take his mama calls? Who don't take that mama call?

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Speaker 3: What man don't take his mama's call. That's the call

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Speaker 3: you got to take because something could be wrong. He

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Speaker 3: ain't taking his mama's call. Your question is if he

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Speaker 3: can't talk to his friends and family around me. Well,

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Speaker 3: because he ain't talking to his friends and his family.

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Speaker 3: Mama that says she don't. He don't even take her call.

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Speaker 3: So who is he talking to? You can't say he

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Speaker 3: talking to his mama. She don't take his call. I

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Speaker 3: can't help this man. He talking to some women. He

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Speaker 3: talking to some women. And what he's saying to this

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Speaker 3: woman you can't hear. And when his phone rang, when

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Speaker 3: y'all out, he get up and walk away because he

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Speaker 3: taking calls from nimbus women trying to make it like

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Speaker 3: he got a regular life.

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Speaker 2: Now, y'all fin to get married.

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Speaker 3: You're going to be married to a man that has

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Speaker 3: a lot of secret phone calls.

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Speaker 2: Hey, baby, let me apes, Hey, let me hit you back,

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Speaker 2: let me hit you back. Busy here, he's here. I

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Speaker 2: can't talk right now, you.

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Speaker 3: Should, that's okay. So any questions, ladies, anybody questions. I

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Speaker 3: can't help this. I can't help him. I can't help Let.

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Speaker 1: Me ask you this me. It sounds like, of course

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Speaker 1: he yes, he is talking to to other women, but

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Speaker 1: why would he be doing that and he's engaged? Just

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Speaker 1: a basic question, why would he be doing that? He's

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Speaker 1: been engaged for two years. What is going on?

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Speaker 2: Why would he be talking to another woman and he engaged?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I just want just a basic question.

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Speaker 2: Well, how else is he gonna have a chick on

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Speaker 2: the side.

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Speaker 1: But you know, some people pop we are like, dang,

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Speaker 1: we're engaged. Why would he you know, right, why would

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Speaker 1: he be talking to someone else? They've been engaged for

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Speaker 1: two years and he's changed so much. I mean at

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Speaker 1: first he didn't. He said, let's be intentional about our relationship.

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Speaker 1: Let's leave our phones and.

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Speaker 3: Now right, you know, now today don't got intentional or

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Speaker 3: he learned all he needed to learn. He needs somebody else.

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Speaker 6: Wow, yes, junior, h okay, I say he talked to

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Speaker 6: the chic onside. But can you tell us where he

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Speaker 6: taking all these phone calls at?

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Speaker 4: And is house?

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Speaker 6: Where's he been taking these phone calls at? Because he

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Speaker 6: can't talk in front of where is he? A? Yeah,

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Speaker 6: he go outside. He in the backyard. He on the

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Speaker 6: other side of the tree in the.

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Speaker 1: Backyard, so he's hiding and talking.

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Speaker 2: He on the other side of the tree. I can't

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Speaker 2: see him.

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Speaker 1: He's just talking.

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Speaker 3: He done went outside, got in the car and started it,

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Speaker 3: sitting there increasing the rpm.

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Speaker 2: So you can't hear.

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Speaker 1: Stay with this guy.

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Speaker 3: She shouldn't follow her intuition. She know what's happening. You

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Speaker 3: know what's happening, but your heart, your heart don't want

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Speaker 3: to believe it.

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Speaker 2: But your mind. My mind keeps telling.

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Speaker 3: Me, Yeah, you gotta go with your mind.

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Speaker 2: Sometimes I can't say your.

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Speaker 1: Post your comments on Today's Strawberry Letter at Steve Harvey

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Speaker 1: FM on Instagram.

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Speaker 2: She can't find his phone nowhere.

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Speaker 1: Check out the Strawberry Letter podcast on the Free iHeartRadio app.

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Speaker 1: Free Never Sounded So good. You can download it Today

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Speaker 1: you're listening to the Steve Harvey Morning Show.