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Speaker 1: Hi, Catherine, Hi Chelsea, Hi? What is going on?

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Speaker 2: Not too much, just loving the fall weather. You've been

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Speaker 2: traveling all over though. Where are you headed?

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Speaker 1: Well? I'm performing in Milwaukee on Friday night, and then

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Speaker 1: I have two shows in Chicago Saturday, Sunday, Milwaukee Sat.

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Speaker 1: And Friday night. And then where is that? What's the theater? Oh,

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Speaker 1: Bradley's Symphony Center, and then the Chicago Theater Saturday and

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Speaker 1: Sunday night. Oh shit, and then another show Sunday night.

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Speaker 1: But that's sold out. Chicago first show is sold out.

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Speaker 1: We have tickets available for Saturday night, October twenty eighth,

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Speaker 1: and tickets available for Milwaukee Thursday night, October twenty six

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Speaker 1: I am in New York City waiting for I just

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Speaker 1: had to get some more knee surgery. I had to

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Speaker 1: get my hat cleaned out, so I am off the pills.

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Speaker 1: I had a two day party, pill party, and then

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Speaker 1: I have to throw them. Well, I don't throw them

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Speaker 1: away because they're gone. They're gone after two days. And

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Speaker 1: that's how any excuse to be put under? Yeah, and

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Speaker 1: he excuse to be put under. But my doctor said,

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Speaker 1: this will allow me afford me the ability to ski

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Speaker 1: without pain because my knee has really been acting since

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Speaker 1: my worka so I'm going to either get my leg

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Speaker 1: removed and replaced. I'm waiting for them to come out

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Speaker 1: with some sort of knee enhancement replacement thing where you

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Speaker 1: don't even have to get surgery but be put under obviously. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I just think it's a matter of months before they

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Speaker 1: have some new technology or AI comes up with a

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Speaker 1: new knee or something. Yeah, you know. So anyway, we

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Speaker 1: have one of my childhood crushes on today mine too.

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Speaker 1: His name is John Stamos. I'm very excited about today.

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Speaker 1: I know he has a new book out. What is

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Speaker 1: it called?

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Speaker 2: It is called if You would Have Told Me?

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Speaker 1: If you would Have Told Me? Okay, well, we're going

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Speaker 1: to see what he is going to tell us because

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Speaker 1: there's a lot of juicy stuff in that book. So

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Speaker 1: he did tell us a lot of things. A lot

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Speaker 1: of celebrity books coming out lately with a lot of

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Speaker 1: insight and inside scoop. He is a three time Emmy

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Speaker 1: Award No TV Film and Theater actor and his memoir

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Speaker 1: is called If You would Have Told Me, and it's

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Speaker 1: out this week. Please welcome John Stamos. How are you, honey?

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Speaker 3: Pretty good.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. John Stamos is in the house. Everybody, John my

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Speaker 1: childhood crush. I loved you so much when I was

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Speaker 1: talking about you. I mean not to say I don't

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Speaker 1: love you now, I mean you're very attractive.

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Speaker 3: So I'm getting old. Well we all are I love

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Speaker 3: I have a crush on you, oh, because you're smart

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Speaker 3: and you're beautiful and I love Remember when I was

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Speaker 3: on your other show.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, a bit, I've interviewed you before.

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Speaker 3: Are you doing good? You look great?

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Speaker 4: Oh?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, thank you. You talk about being happy now and

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Speaker 3: stuff that makes me happy.

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Speaker 1: Oh are you happy?

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Speaker 3: I am?

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Speaker 1: Yeah? You know what what? I was reading your book?

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Speaker 1: You guys, Yeah, yes, of course. The book is called

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Speaker 1: if you would have told me it's out this week,

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Speaker 1: it's John Stamos's it's your first.

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Speaker 3: Book, yes, right, yeah, I want to talk to you

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Speaker 3: about the process, because.

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Speaker 1: Well, what do you want to talk about? Let's get started.

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Speaker 3: How was it?

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Speaker 1: I like, I mean, listen, it's a very different medium

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Speaker 1: than everything that you're probably used to. So if this

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Speaker 1: is your first book, I can understand you probably feel

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Speaker 1: a little bit overwhelmed, right.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I was. I feel good now that it's done.

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Speaker 3: But then no, no, we have to gotten. You don't

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Speaker 3: have to gotten sell it.

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Speaker 1: Sell it and promote it, and that is a different beast.

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Speaker 1: But you know what I find that is nice and

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Speaker 1: refreshing about books. And maybe you can think about this

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Speaker 1: while you're promoting it. It's like you're not promoting a

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Speaker 1: project that you're not completely responsible for. It's your story, right,

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Speaker 1: so they're your truths and then you get to just

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Speaker 1: talk about yourself in the most kind of I feel like,

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Speaker 1: most organic way, rather than promoting a show or a movie.

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Speaker 3: You're right, Yeah, it has been interesting that the interviews

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Speaker 3: I've done so far, especially the doing this long form,

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Speaker 3: because you can really get into because there's a lot

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Speaker 3: of you know, intricate stuff in the book and ups

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Speaker 3: and down and toffic. But to do it, you know,

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Speaker 3: do a quick pop on it.

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Speaker 1: It's difficult, right, yes, absolutely, but you want to get

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Speaker 1: people interested enough to buy it. Listen, there's a lot

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Speaker 1: of interesting stuff in this book.

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Speaker 3: And can I ask you a question, So therapies you've

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Speaker 3: been that's your Do you think.

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Speaker 1: You're interviewing me right now?

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Speaker 3: Is that what you're not trying to I just I'm

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Speaker 3: fascinated by you always, and I like to ask questions.

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Speaker 1: I went to therapy for about two years, intense therapy

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Speaker 1: with the sky Dan Siegel, and it changed my I

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Speaker 1: mean it took a while. Like if someone said, oh,

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Speaker 1: therapy was going to take two years and then probably

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Speaker 1: two years of absorbing what you learned in therapy, I

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Speaker 1: would have been like, that's too fucking long, like fuck it.

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Speaker 1: But I went in before I knew how long it

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Speaker 1: was going to take, and so it was like.

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Speaker 3: You think it was a couple a couple of a

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Speaker 3: couple of seconds.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I think. I thought I'm pretty smart, like I'll

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Speaker 1: get this quickly. And then as soon as you get deeper,

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Speaker 1: have you are you in therapy?

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Speaker 3: Yeah? Yeah, I talk about in the book to this

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Speaker 3: guy Phil Stutz, who's sort of a famous Oh yeah.

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Speaker 1: Stuts, the one that they did the documentary.

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Speaker 3: Was right, Yeah, okay, I was going to way before.

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Speaker 3: I think it was like twelve years ago. I can't

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Speaker 3: remember who sent me there. Maybe I had saga go

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Speaker 3: I said, we can't be friends anymore until you go

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Speaker 3: to therapy. Oh yeah, he was. He was there till

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Speaker 3: he died. How he still owes film money? Phil told

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Speaker 3: me he said he didn't pay for his last session.

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Speaker 1: Well, he doesn't need the money.

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Speaker 3: So it helped you.

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Speaker 1: Then it helped me, Yes, it helped me immensely. It

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Speaker 1: helped me with my self awareness. It helped me understand

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Speaker 1: the way that I the vibes I'm giving off if

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Speaker 1: my personality was coming before any sort of thoughtfulness. So

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Speaker 1: now I'm a little bit more thoughtful and careful with

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Speaker 1: my personality rather than throwing it out there. It's not

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Speaker 1: necessary for me to insert myself all the time.

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Speaker 3: Mike, I said, you've already chimed the world. Stop. You

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Speaker 3: don't have to do anymore. Just sit back and you know, yes,

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Speaker 3: stuff trying is hard. Maybe that's you.

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Speaker 1: Well we get I think we get interesting conversation because

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Speaker 1: I think we get very wrapped up in who we.

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Speaker 3: Think we are and who we think they want us

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Speaker 3: to be. Yes, yeah, I had that a lot too,

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Speaker 3: you know, just coming under the scene, you know, being

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Speaker 3: a teen idol, and then you know some sort of

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Speaker 3: you know guy which wasn't me, like, you know, and

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Speaker 3: I'd go on Howard Stern or Jamie Kimmel or all

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Speaker 3: these shows, and I gas, oh, you're a playboy. Tell

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Speaker 3: me about all the girls you fucked I'm like, oh, yeah,

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Speaker 3: doesn't did that none of it? It was true, but

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Speaker 3: I felt I had to be that guy for that,

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Speaker 3: which is when I and they didn't. It wasn't their fault.

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Speaker 3: I played into it. But once I let that go,

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Speaker 3: and it's just hard to trust yourself that you're good

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Speaker 3: enough and you're interesting enough, and they're charming enough, right

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Speaker 3: just to sit and talk. And I didn't like I

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Speaker 3: went into growing up kicking and screaming. I just barely

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Speaker 3: made it too. I just didn't want to because it

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Speaker 3: just seemed boring to me and it really required sober

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Speaker 3: up to But it's you know, it's been the greatest.

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Speaker 3: I've just turned sixty.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god. Really, yeah, that's amazing.

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Speaker 3: Well look I'm tired of that.

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Speaker 1: But you know it's okay, I'm forty.

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Speaker 3: We're gonna have a big birthday.

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Speaker 1: Well in two years. I mean, yeah, I gotta start

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Speaker 1: planning it now if I'm going to have the right

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Speaker 1: kind of birthday party. I just want everyone to know

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Speaker 1: that I offered John an edible before this interview started,

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Speaker 1: because I forgot he was sober, and this is a

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Speaker 1: big problem with me as well. Back to the therapy thing,

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Speaker 1: real quick. One of the things I learned, which is

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Speaker 1: interesting what you're saying, is, you know, I always thought

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Speaker 1: I had to be the center, like the excitement of

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Speaker 1: a dinner party or like the entertainment for everybody. Like

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Speaker 1: I thought that's what people expected of me, that I

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Speaker 1: had to go to every dinner party and just be

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Speaker 1: the funniest person there. And if there was another funny

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Speaker 1: person there, I was so relieved. I was like, let

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Speaker 1: them do it. But everyone is so insecure about their

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Speaker 1: own funny that people would look to me and be like, no,

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Speaker 1: you go, you do it, and I'll you know. So

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Speaker 1: it became this weird cycle of like you impress upon

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Speaker 1: yourself what you assume people are expecting of you, when

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Speaker 1: really maybe not everybody's expecting any of that.

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Speaker 3: No, And then they go to Chelsea's she got to

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Speaker 3: calm down, calm down, you know, say with me, I

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Speaker 3: thought I was had to be that, and I, you know,

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Speaker 3: drinking too, I thought I gotta be, you know, so

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Speaker 3: I can be funny and sharp. People see, you know,

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Speaker 3: it's fuzzy, is what they saw. Yeah. I bet you

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Speaker 3: feel that too, because you know you're you are people

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Speaker 3: see you on TV and you're funny, and you're sharp

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Speaker 3: and you're very smart too. I think that's what impresses

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Speaker 3: me most about you.

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Speaker 1: Well, thank you. I appreciate you lost you.

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Speaker 3: I know you lost your brother when you're young and

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Speaker 3: abandonment issues. But then there was another really sweet brother

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Speaker 3: who I met on your show.

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Speaker 1: Is he still yeah, Roy is the best, He's the sweetest.

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Speaker 1: I will he'll love that he still y passed?

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Speaker 3: Did he really?

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Speaker 5: Yeah?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, but I mean I'll see you're doing great. By

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Speaker 3: the way, I'll see.

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Speaker 1: Him in the afterlife anyway. You know how when did

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Speaker 1: he die a couple of years ago? Yeah? He was sweet, right, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: he was a sweetheart. One of the things that I

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Speaker 1: was reading about in your book that I took issue

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Speaker 1: with is your love of Disneyland and disney World.

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Speaker 3: Well I find that annoying, right, Yeah, to be honest

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Speaker 3: with you, I was, I was over it. I was done.

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Speaker 3: And then I met my wife and he's like me

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Speaker 3: back in you know last night.

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Speaker 1: Your wife loves disney World? Yea, and she and so

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Speaker 1: what was the period of time you were able to

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Speaker 1: stay away from disney World or Disneyland a couple weeks?

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Speaker 3: It was a couple It was a while, I was

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Speaker 3: just it was enough already, I thought, you know, honestly,

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Speaker 3: but last night this.

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Speaker 1: Why were you spending so much time there?

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Speaker 3: In the first it was have you been?

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Speaker 1: Yeah? I was.

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Speaker 3: I was there honestly, like towards like before I sobered

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Speaker 3: up for ten years. It was kind of fun to

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Speaker 3: go and get drunk there, you know, And there was a.

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Speaker 1: It was dry. It was dry for a long time

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Speaker 1: time in the world. They didn't have any alcohol there at.

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Speaker 3: The at the Magic Kingdom, Catherine Magic Kingdom they don't,

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Speaker 3: but but Epcot they have. You'd have beers across the world.

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Speaker 3: But no. I did get over because it's when you

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Speaker 3: walk to those gates the rest of the world goes

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Speaker 3: away and it's just a it's you have. It's a

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Speaker 3: happy place to be.

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Speaker 1: That's how I feel about the Playboy. Man.

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Speaker 3: You it used to be the last night. So I'm

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Speaker 3: leaving town. I'm so busy with all this book stuff.

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Speaker 3: And my wife says, and we do this once in

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Speaker 3: a while. I was like, I got a surprise. We're

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Speaker 3: going on date night tonight. This is the last night.

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Speaker 3: I said, great, where is it? I can't tell you,

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Speaker 3: you know, I said, O, yeah, I don't have a

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Speaker 3: lot of time, but I want to at least spend

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Speaker 3: one good night with you before we go. And so

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Speaker 3: I said, what do I wear? Said? Boots? Boots are good.

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Speaker 3: What else? Well, that's good what you have on? I said,

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Speaker 3: is it a hike? Is it outdoors? It might be

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Speaker 3: my not you know. So we get so we're driving

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Speaker 3: a by Pasadena. We're going up to this neighborhood house

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Speaker 3: and there's no parking. I said, what's the date night?

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Speaker 3: You and need to what's a Disney party? And there's

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Speaker 3: a couple of Disney legends that are going to be

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Speaker 3: there and a hundred other Disney any geek fans that

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Speaker 3: you're gonna take pictures? I said, this is date night?

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Speaker 3: And it was that nice people. But you know, I said,

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Speaker 3: every selfie I take you give me a hand job?

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Speaker 1: And did she did?

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Speaker 5: She?

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Speaker 3: Yeah? It was about eight hundred.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, when is she going to start giving you the

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Speaker 1: hand job?

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Speaker 3: I should have Scott something better? Huh probably, So, I

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Speaker 3: don't know, but she loves it. I'm you know, I'm.

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Speaker 1: Just happy you're in a happy relationship. You know what

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Speaker 1: I mean? If you have to give a bunch of

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Speaker 1: hand jobs and go to a bunch of Disney events.

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Speaker 3: I don't have to give that hand Oh no.

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Speaker 1: I mean if you have to get sorry to get

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Speaker 1: a bunch of hand jobs and go to a bunch

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Speaker 1: of Disney events, then that's the bed you made, and

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Speaker 1: now you're to lie in it.

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Speaker 3: You're right now. You can I ask you about this,

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Speaker 3: Joe Koy, because I.

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Speaker 1: Love that you think you're fucking interviewing.

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Speaker 3: I'm just I'm interested.

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Speaker 1: I have a series of questions I want to ask

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Speaker 1: you already.

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Speaker 3: I thought it was going to be the greatest thing

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Speaker 3: ever to you. I was so happy for for you.

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Speaker 3: I didn't know him much. But and then, but do

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Speaker 3: you feel like if you fall in love again, you

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Speaker 3: kind of keep it quiet for a couple of years.

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Speaker 1: Probably you know. I don't need to learn that lesson twice.

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Speaker 1: Although I didn't even listen. To be very honest, I

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Speaker 1: don't feel regret or a rootful towards the way that

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Speaker 1: I behaved publicly with him. I think that was a

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Speaker 1: very good exercise for me, and it was nice for

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Speaker 1: other people to see that side of me, because I've.

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Speaker 2: Never been soft.

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Speaker 3: It was a softer show, very.

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Speaker 1: Like publicly in love before, so I don't really regret that,

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Speaker 1: even though I probably wouldn't choose to operate like that again,

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Speaker 1: you know what I mean, because it's like, you know,

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Speaker 1: who needs to It's almost very like teenager ish. But

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Speaker 1: that's how it was cute. It was a thing.

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Speaker 3: It just felt so bad.

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Speaker 1: But it's okay. I mean, just a relationships end, you know,

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Speaker 1: and you learn from them, and and I think that

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Speaker 1: the most important thing to do as we get older

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Speaker 1: is to remember not to villainize or demonize the people

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Speaker 1: who've left our lives and actually look at them and say,

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Speaker 1: you know what, what did that person bring out in me?

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Speaker 1: That someone that I hadn't been brought out in me before?

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Speaker 1: So I think that's okay.

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Speaker 3: I have like I think before taking top.

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Speaker 1: Off, because John's turning me on.

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Speaker 3: Okay, I think before I wrote this book, I would say, oh,

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Speaker 3: I have regrets. Yeah, this I didn't. I got dumped,

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Speaker 3: I got cheated on a man, And after writing I

301
00:12:05,400 --> 00:12:07,280
Speaker 3: were like, no, that's like what you said, Like, if

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Speaker 3: I didn't have those heartbreaks that happened, I wouldn't have

303
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Speaker 3: known how to be right for my marriage.

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Speaker 1: Now, well you're yeah, because especially because you were married

305
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Speaker 1: to Rebecca Romaine first before your current wife, and you

306
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Speaker 1: talk about that in the book, and you talk about

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Speaker 1: your therapist and that marriage ending right and your therapist

308
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Speaker 1: basically telling you that you weren't ready to be with

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Speaker 1: the one and that you had a lot of work

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Speaker 1: to do, right, So what were those conversations like.

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Speaker 3: Well, it was more it was more about it was

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Speaker 3: heartbreaking and I didn't want it to end. And you know,

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Speaker 3: I always thought have kids and a thing and you know,

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Speaker 3: fairy tale ending. And when it did, it ripped me apart.

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Speaker 3: And I was angry for many years, too angry, and.

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Speaker 1: It wasn't her or angry at the situation.

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Speaker 3: Well her, you know, as I learned. So I had

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Speaker 3: the first chapter I wrote was I thought I'd take

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Speaker 3: the hardest ones and I wrote about this terrible the

320
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Speaker 3: low point in my life. I had this dui and

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Speaker 3: I was driving drunkers drive around Beverly Hills, and I

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Speaker 3: went to rehab and I think it was there where

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Speaker 3: I discovered, like, so the steps you probably know something.

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Speaker 3: The fourth step is your resentments. So I was like,

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Speaker 3: she did this to me, she did that, And I'm

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Speaker 3: making this long list and the sponsors. Have you done

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Speaker 3: I said, noff, and then he goes, so, what part

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Speaker 3: did you play in that? I said, what do you mean?

329
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Speaker 3: What none? It might have played, even if it's one percent.

330
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Speaker 3: And I started writing and say, oh, yeah, yeah. And

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Speaker 3: it was the first time I really was honest about it.

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Speaker 3: And I had just as much to do with the

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Speaker 3: end of our marriage as she did, so you know, you.

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Speaker 1: Learn, yeah, yeah, what was that last thing that broke

335
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Speaker 1: the like the last straw that broke the camel's back

336
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Speaker 1: in the marriage?

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Speaker 3: I started to get emasculated, and I don't know how

338
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Speaker 3: much of it was her fault or how much was mine,

339
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Speaker 3: but I felt the relationship just was like she was

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Speaker 3: here and I was down here and I was, oh,

341
00:13:51,920 --> 00:13:54,839
Speaker 3: you're on TV. I'm and it just was not good.

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Speaker 3: And we split up for a while and we got

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Speaker 3: back together and it was there was a lot of

344
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Speaker 3: rules just didn't work, and I just said, this is

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Speaker 3: not working, you know, and we walked away. But I

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Speaker 3: have never seen her since.

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Speaker 1: But have you never spoken to her since?

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00:14:09,280 --> 00:14:10,719
Speaker 3: The last time I talked to her was in this

349
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Speaker 3: But thank god, because I did more about myself, like

350
00:14:14,960 --> 00:14:16,599
Speaker 3: I'm not gonna go I would never go into a

351
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Speaker 3: relationship the same way, and thank god I didn't when

352
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Speaker 3: Caitlyn came around.

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Speaker 1: Right, And so how did you what tools did you

354
00:14:23,440 --> 00:14:25,760
Speaker 1: have or like that you developed over the years that

355
00:14:25,920 --> 00:14:28,960
Speaker 1: made you be able to like start in a healthy

356
00:14:29,000 --> 00:14:30,880
Speaker 1: way this relationship or healthier.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, for sure. I mean I knew that I wanted to.

358
00:14:34,520 --> 00:14:36,920
Speaker 3: I could get by for so many years with fifty

359
00:14:36,920 --> 00:14:41,240
Speaker 3: percent more than most people sixty percent maybe in anything work.

360
00:14:41,640 --> 00:14:43,480
Speaker 3: And I was just always afraid to give a hundred

361
00:14:43,520 --> 00:14:45,720
Speaker 3: because if you failed, then you're then Wow, you gave

362
00:14:45,760 --> 00:14:48,760
Speaker 3: it as all and you failed. So with the relationships,

363
00:14:48,760 --> 00:14:50,760
Speaker 3: I'm gonna give it my all. I'm gonna throw everything

364
00:14:50,800 --> 00:14:52,960
Speaker 3: I'm gonna be and if it doesn't work, at least

365
00:14:52,960 --> 00:14:57,320
Speaker 3: I know how to do that right. Sober and loyal

366
00:14:57,360 --> 00:15:00,560
Speaker 3: and honest and all the stuff it and it it worked.

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00:15:00,960 --> 00:15:01,720
Speaker 3: Does that make sense?

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00:15:02,240 --> 00:15:04,720
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean it makes sense. How many years have

369
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Speaker 1: you been sober?

370
00:15:06,040 --> 00:15:06,720
Speaker 3: Close to eight?

371
00:15:07,040 --> 00:15:10,080
Speaker 1: Eight years? Okay, So would you consider that newly sober? No?

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Speaker 3: I was, you know, I was drinking into my fifties

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Speaker 3: and it just it was just time.

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Speaker 1: Well, you talk. You have a lot of examples in

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Speaker 1: the Book of Times where you I mean you don't

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Speaker 1: make yourself look good in this book and a lot

377
00:15:21,560 --> 00:15:24,080
Speaker 1: of areas, and I actually appreciate that because I also

378
00:15:24,280 --> 00:15:26,240
Speaker 1: like to be honest. You it's very important to be

379
00:15:26,280 --> 00:15:28,280
Speaker 1: honest and not to gloss over like and pretend like

380
00:15:28,280 --> 00:15:29,760
Speaker 1: you've got your crushing it all the time.

381
00:15:29,960 --> 00:15:31,720
Speaker 3: I started out that way. I was like, I'm going

382
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Speaker 3: to write a hero book. And I started writing like

383
00:15:33,600 --> 00:15:35,400
Speaker 3: this is sex pullshit, and it turned into a phuman

384
00:15:35,520 --> 00:15:38,600
Speaker 3: you know, it was a human story because again, like

385
00:15:38,640 --> 00:15:40,560
Speaker 3: I never wanted. I never thought i'd write a book.

386
00:15:40,600 --> 00:15:42,160
Speaker 3: It wasn't in my thing. I didn't think I was

387
00:15:42,200 --> 00:15:44,520
Speaker 3: sharp enough. And friends of mine that were writing, but

388
00:15:44,800 --> 00:15:46,640
Speaker 3: how do you do it? Why do you even start it?

389
00:15:46,720 --> 00:15:48,760
Speaker 3: I just didn't get it, didn't get it. And then

390
00:15:48,800 --> 00:15:51,840
Speaker 3: when Bob died, I wrote a beautiful obituary kind of

391
00:15:51,840 --> 00:15:54,240
Speaker 3: thing in La Times. I remember, and so people say, oh,

392
00:15:54,280 --> 00:15:55,840
Speaker 3: you're a good writer. And I had a kid too,

393
00:15:55,920 --> 00:15:57,480
Speaker 3: and I said, okay, so now I'm a father. What

394
00:15:57,520 --> 00:15:59,200
Speaker 3: was that like? And I just kept saying no, And

395
00:15:59,240 --> 00:16:02,240
Speaker 3: then I really thought about leaving something behind for him,

396
00:16:02,520 --> 00:16:04,320
Speaker 3: A love letter to all the beautiful people that have

397
00:16:04,360 --> 00:16:06,480
Speaker 3: come in and out of my life, to my wife,

398
00:16:06,480 --> 00:16:07,960
Speaker 3: and I've had a lot of mentors over the years

399
00:16:07,960 --> 00:16:10,720
Speaker 3: that I wanted to talk about. But then the clutch

400
00:16:10,880 --> 00:16:12,480
Speaker 3: was that I found I knew I had them, but

401
00:16:12,960 --> 00:16:14,760
Speaker 3: I dug up all these letters that my mom left me,

402
00:16:14,840 --> 00:16:16,840
Speaker 3: these little notes that she would leave me and my sisters.

403
00:16:16,960 --> 00:16:20,160
Speaker 3: I said, Okay, that's a good place to start. Yeah,

404
00:16:20,240 --> 00:16:21,200
Speaker 3: did your mom pass away?

405
00:16:21,280 --> 00:16:22,880
Speaker 1: Yeah, my mom and my dad are both Dad I'm

406
00:16:22,880 --> 00:16:24,920
Speaker 1: an orphan. I just have my brothers and sisters.

407
00:16:25,280 --> 00:16:26,640
Speaker 3: It's a lot five or so.

408
00:16:26,800 --> 00:16:28,720
Speaker 1: Yeah, there's enough of us to go around. Plus we

409
00:16:28,760 --> 00:16:31,080
Speaker 1: have eight nieces and nephews, so there's like, you know,

410
00:16:31,480 --> 00:16:33,320
Speaker 1: we have a big family and all of them are

411
00:16:33,360 --> 00:16:35,600
Speaker 1: married or have girlfriends. And then we have like ten

412
00:16:35,680 --> 00:16:38,400
Speaker 1: cousins that live in LA so we just well not ten,

413
00:16:38,440 --> 00:16:40,280
Speaker 1: but I say ten as a round number, but there's

414
00:16:40,320 --> 00:16:41,160
Speaker 1: eight anyway.

415
00:16:41,280 --> 00:16:42,120
Speaker 3: Who lives at your house?

416
00:16:42,120 --> 00:16:42,200
Speaker 6: Now?

417
00:16:42,280 --> 00:16:43,400
Speaker 3: Do you have any I'm.

418
00:16:43,280 --> 00:16:45,880
Speaker 1: Actually living with No, I'm waiting for my house to

419
00:16:45,920 --> 00:16:48,920
Speaker 1: be built, and I am living with my neighbor. So

420
00:16:49,280 --> 00:16:51,480
Speaker 1: talk to me about being like a father.

421
00:16:51,840 --> 00:16:53,880
Speaker 3: This is something I always wanted, and through the book,

422
00:16:53,920 --> 00:16:55,240
Speaker 3: I was trying to find, like you do, like try

423
00:16:55,280 --> 00:16:57,760
Speaker 3: to find as many relatable issues you know, it's like,

424
00:16:57,800 --> 00:16:59,200
Speaker 3: how many people can relate tonight and play with the

425
00:16:59,200 --> 00:17:00,360
Speaker 3: beach boys people?

426
00:17:00,800 --> 00:17:03,720
Speaker 1: But well, you bring up another topic beach boys. You

427
00:17:03,800 --> 00:17:06,520
Speaker 1: learn transcendental meditation with beach boys, right, because you drum

428
00:17:06,640 --> 00:17:08,879
Speaker 1: for the beach boys. I don't do TM. I do

429
00:17:08,920 --> 00:17:10,600
Speaker 1: regular meditation, but I know a lot of people who

430
00:17:10,600 --> 00:17:13,679
Speaker 1: do TM. What Yeah, Howard does it for sure? How

431
00:17:13,720 --> 00:17:15,000
Speaker 1: do you? How would you.

432
00:17:14,920 --> 00:17:16,320
Speaker 3: Describe it TM?

433
00:17:16,400 --> 00:17:16,640
Speaker 1: Yeah?

434
00:17:16,760 --> 00:17:19,320
Speaker 3: You know it's meditate twice twenty minutes. I'm not very

435
00:17:19,320 --> 00:17:20,639
Speaker 3: good at it any more. I mean, I don't keep

436
00:17:20,720 --> 00:17:22,360
Speaker 3: up with it as much as they should. But even

437
00:17:22,400 --> 00:17:24,200
Speaker 3: just to sit for twenty minutes, and you say this

438
00:17:24,320 --> 00:17:26,120
Speaker 3: mantra over over again, one own mind.

439
00:17:26,359 --> 00:17:28,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, well you're not supposed to tell your mantra so

440
00:17:28,720 --> 00:17:29,440
Speaker 1: that much. I know.

441
00:17:30,359 --> 00:17:32,200
Speaker 3: I got it, Catherine, You're doing great, brother way.

442
00:17:32,080 --> 00:17:34,160
Speaker 2: Oh think I'm just enjoying the conversation.

443
00:17:34,720 --> 00:17:36,359
Speaker 3: Well, so, wait, so I wanted to come up with

444
00:17:36,400 --> 00:17:39,879
Speaker 3: relatable things. Oh this is the point was that it

445
00:17:39,960 --> 00:17:41,760
Speaker 3: had something to do with sex. Gosh darn it.

446
00:17:41,800 --> 00:17:44,000
Speaker 1: What was it that you want to have sex with me?

447
00:17:44,119 --> 00:17:47,760
Speaker 3: I want it? I want it. Well, hey, honey, we're

448
00:17:47,760 --> 00:17:49,640
Speaker 3: going date night? Where is it going to be we'll

449
00:17:49,640 --> 00:17:51,879
Speaker 3: be at your house. Yeah, okay, And she was so

450
00:17:51,880 --> 00:17:53,640
Speaker 3: mad because I wouldn't take a tour of the house.

451
00:17:53,720 --> 00:17:55,639
Speaker 3: Is about this. It was Disney's house, lived there for

452
00:17:55,640 --> 00:17:57,720
Speaker 3: a little while, but it wasn't very big. And she's like,

453
00:17:57,720 --> 00:17:59,080
Speaker 3: come on, let's go on this tour.

454
00:17:58,960 --> 00:18:01,480
Speaker 1: But I want to know what you do for four

455
00:18:01,520 --> 00:18:04,200
Speaker 1: hours when you go to Walt Disney's house before the tour.

456
00:18:04,400 --> 00:18:06,120
Speaker 3: What's selfies with everybody there?

457
00:18:06,240 --> 00:18:06,400
Speaker 6: Oh?

458
00:18:06,480 --> 00:18:06,800
Speaker 2: Really?

459
00:18:07,119 --> 00:18:08,639
Speaker 1: Do you hate taking selfies? No?

460
00:18:08,680 --> 00:18:09,160
Speaker 3: I don't mind.

461
00:18:09,280 --> 00:18:10,800
Speaker 1: No, no, no, I don't mind it either.

462
00:18:10,880 --> 00:18:13,120
Speaker 3: I want it's easier than signing autographs. And I heard

463
00:18:13,119 --> 00:18:15,800
Speaker 3: you talking about like, you know, you spell a certain

464
00:18:15,840 --> 00:18:18,240
Speaker 3: name and that's not how I spelled it. That's not

465
00:18:18,280 --> 00:18:19,680
Speaker 3: my my mom mom spelled it wrong.

466
00:18:20,000 --> 00:18:22,840
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah yeah. I once had a girl name like

467
00:18:22,920 --> 00:18:26,200
Speaker 1: it was Lafourtia, but she spelled it Lafourtia out of

468
00:18:26,200 --> 00:18:29,200
Speaker 1: book signing. This happened. She said her name was Lafortia,

469
00:18:29,280 --> 00:18:33,439
Speaker 1: but with the number four, so la apostrophe four and

470
00:18:33,440 --> 00:18:35,280
Speaker 1: then s H A E. And I was like, that

471
00:18:35,359 --> 00:18:40,440
Speaker 1: can't be on your license like a regular spelling. So

472
00:18:40,680 --> 00:18:42,240
Speaker 1: that's what I was like, Oh, fuck, I better be.

473
00:18:42,480 --> 00:18:44,920
Speaker 1: You have to ask when you're doing. You always go

474
00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:48,360
Speaker 1: like if it's if it's you know, Kate the normal way,

475
00:18:48,680 --> 00:18:49,920
Speaker 1: is it? Kate ka y t?

476
00:18:50,480 --> 00:18:51,320
Speaker 3: Yeah? Yeah, I hate that.

477
00:18:51,440 --> 00:18:53,080
Speaker 1: You're also going to get carpal tunnel syndrome.

478
00:18:53,160 --> 00:18:56,159
Speaker 3: I writing because I've been signing. But wait, we were

479
00:18:56,160 --> 00:18:59,119
Speaker 3: talking about sex. I was trying to find relatable stuff.

480
00:18:59,400 --> 00:19:00,800
Speaker 3: I was talking about having a kid, right.

481
00:19:00,800 --> 00:19:03,000
Speaker 1: Okay, that you have to have sex to have a kid. Yeah,

482
00:19:03,600 --> 00:19:04,640
Speaker 1: you do. Yeah.

483
00:19:05,119 --> 00:19:07,600
Speaker 3: I was trying to find where's the last time he

484
00:19:07,640 --> 00:19:07,960
Speaker 3: had six?

485
00:19:08,800 --> 00:19:11,280
Speaker 1: It's been a few months for me.

486
00:19:11,359 --> 00:19:12,040
Speaker 3: Yeah, we know.

487
00:19:13,800 --> 00:19:14,639
Speaker 1: Somebody in London?

488
00:19:16,080 --> 00:19:16,440
Speaker 6: Yeah, I was.

489
00:19:16,600 --> 00:19:18,280
Speaker 1: I was on vacation, so I usually get most of

490
00:19:18,320 --> 00:19:19,240
Speaker 1: my action overseas.

491
00:19:19,359 --> 00:19:22,720
Speaker 3: Was it somebody who's met.

492
00:19:21,560 --> 00:19:21,960
Speaker 6: At a bar?

493
00:19:22,960 --> 00:19:23,440
Speaker 1: Yeah?

494
00:19:23,520 --> 00:19:24,119
Speaker 3: Wow.

495
00:19:24,240 --> 00:19:26,080
Speaker 1: I like that kind of interaction.

496
00:19:26,000 --> 00:19:27,399
Speaker 3: When I was single, And if I saw you at

497
00:19:27,400 --> 00:19:29,680
Speaker 3: a bar in London. First of all, be these guys

498
00:19:29,680 --> 00:19:30,639
Speaker 3: are not intimidated by you.

499
00:19:30,680 --> 00:19:32,240
Speaker 1: Men are intimidated by me, and a lot of them

500
00:19:32,240 --> 00:19:33,000
Speaker 1: cannot perform.

501
00:19:33,040 --> 00:19:34,120
Speaker 3: Is it the glasses do you think?

502
00:19:34,200 --> 00:19:35,720
Speaker 1: No, I don't wear my glasses when I'm out. Those

503
00:19:35,720 --> 00:19:38,439
Speaker 1: are only for today. Because I was reading, men are

504
00:19:38,480 --> 00:19:40,840
Speaker 1: intimidated that how do you mean? And and it see

505
00:19:40,880 --> 00:19:43,720
Speaker 1: and it plays out like they have trouble performing sexually.

506
00:19:43,840 --> 00:19:45,840
Speaker 1: So a lot of times I will be out with

507
00:19:45,920 --> 00:19:49,000
Speaker 1: a man and you know, we're at a bar or something,

508
00:19:49,080 --> 00:19:50,960
Speaker 1: or at a club. I mean not that I'm a clubber,

509
00:19:51,000 --> 00:19:52,800
Speaker 1: but like when I'm in London, I go out. When

510
00:19:52,800 --> 00:19:54,399
Speaker 1: I'm in Spain, I'm out and I'll be like, do

511
00:19:54,400 --> 00:19:55,719
Speaker 1: you want to come back to my house? And then

512
00:19:55,720 --> 00:19:58,040
Speaker 1: we get back to my house and they cannot perform sexually.

513
00:19:58,359 --> 00:20:01,920
Speaker 1: This is a constant in my life and it's obviously

514
00:20:01,960 --> 00:20:05,639
Speaker 1: my personality, and men are just either scared or turned

515
00:20:05,640 --> 00:20:07,840
Speaker 1: off or I don't know, But why would they come

516
00:20:07,840 --> 00:20:09,159
Speaker 1: back to my house if they weren't going to be

517
00:20:09,160 --> 00:20:10,879
Speaker 1: able to perform? I don't get that.

518
00:20:11,000 --> 00:20:12,600
Speaker 3: There're the wrong guys, these guys.

519
00:20:12,680 --> 00:20:15,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, So I just keep auditioning different people and seeing

520
00:20:15,200 --> 00:20:15,840
Speaker 1: who could appen.

521
00:20:15,880 --> 00:20:17,440
Speaker 3: What happens. So you're in London, you say come back

522
00:20:17,440 --> 00:20:18,639
Speaker 3: to my place and the guy goes.

523
00:20:18,920 --> 00:20:21,520
Speaker 1: Sometimes they'll so once a guy was like, I go,

524
00:20:21,600 --> 00:20:22,879
Speaker 1: do you want to come back to my place? And

525
00:20:23,000 --> 00:20:26,040
Speaker 1: he left, He goes, he goes, I'm going to the bathroom,

526
00:20:26,480 --> 00:20:27,960
Speaker 1: and he goes, I'll be right back, and he never

527
00:20:28,000 --> 00:20:28,360
Speaker 1: came back.

528
00:20:28,400 --> 00:20:31,240
Speaker 3: I can't imagine any fool would do that. But see

529
00:20:31,240 --> 00:20:33,600
Speaker 3: the thing about these fantasy like and I try to

530
00:20:33,600 --> 00:20:35,440
Speaker 3: talk about it in here too, where when I was

531
00:20:35,440 --> 00:20:37,479
Speaker 3: a kid, some penhouse girl came into my dressing room

532
00:20:37,480 --> 00:20:40,080
Speaker 3: at General Hospital and had sex with me, and I

533
00:20:40,160 --> 00:20:42,679
Speaker 3: was depressed afterward, you know, and I think, you know,

534
00:20:42,680 --> 00:20:45,240
Speaker 3: I think people maybe think that our lives, they probably

535
00:20:45,280 --> 00:20:47,680
Speaker 3: think our lives are fantastic, right they pulled the curtain

536
00:20:47,680 --> 00:20:51,120
Speaker 3: behind like, oh she's fucked up, Yeah, captain.

537
00:20:50,840 --> 00:20:54,199
Speaker 4: But yeah, yeah, I like that scene too, because you

538
00:20:54,240 --> 00:20:56,760
Speaker 4: talk about like the glaring overhead light and the vinyl

539
00:20:56,840 --> 00:20:57,360
Speaker 4: you know what I mean.

540
00:20:57,400 --> 00:20:57,680
Speaker 3: Like it.

541
00:20:57,920 --> 00:20:59,240
Speaker 2: You know, it wasn't the fantasy.

542
00:20:59,480 --> 00:21:02,320
Speaker 3: No. I tried to Yeah again, I tried to find

543
00:21:02,359 --> 00:21:05,159
Speaker 3: the relatable stuff. I started off with getting this dui,

544
00:21:05,400 --> 00:21:06,960
Speaker 3: and so I thought, okay, that's a good place to start,

545
00:21:07,080 --> 00:21:09,200
Speaker 3: the hardest thing I thought. It turns out it wasn't.

546
00:21:09,240 --> 00:21:11,439
Speaker 3: And the five stages of grief there were more booze

547
00:21:11,440 --> 00:21:15,200
Speaker 3: and taccon bullshit. And then then the second chapter I wrote,

548
00:21:15,240 --> 00:21:16,800
Speaker 3: which happened to be the end, was the day I

549
00:21:16,800 --> 00:21:19,439
Speaker 3: found out that Bob died. And by this point, you know,

550
00:21:19,560 --> 00:21:22,840
Speaker 3: my five stages of grief were therapy and family and prayer,

551
00:21:23,000 --> 00:21:25,280
Speaker 3: you know, getting my shit together, and it was so

552
00:21:25,400 --> 00:21:28,520
Speaker 3: then I had to figure out how a to b Yeah,

553
00:21:28,720 --> 00:21:30,439
Speaker 3: but I tried not to be honest. You know a

554
00:21:30,440 --> 00:21:33,760
Speaker 3: lot of the times. My mother kept every teen magazine,

555
00:21:33,840 --> 00:21:37,080
Speaker 3: every calendar, every journal, every picture. You took a lot

556
00:21:37,160 --> 00:21:39,960
Speaker 3: of pictures, so it was sort of easy to fact

557
00:21:40,040 --> 00:21:40,920
Speaker 3: check everything as well.

558
00:21:41,000 --> 00:21:42,920
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, because you don't want to put out a

559
00:21:42,960 --> 00:21:45,080
Speaker 1: book like this and not be truthful. And I think

560
00:21:45,119 --> 00:21:47,760
Speaker 1: part of the catharsis of doing writing a book is

561
00:21:47,800 --> 00:21:50,320
Speaker 1: being able to be truthful because when you are in

562
00:21:50,359 --> 00:21:53,199
Speaker 1: the public eye, you have such little privacy that you

563
00:21:53,280 --> 00:21:55,639
Speaker 1: try to retain. I know this from being friends with

564
00:21:55,680 --> 00:21:57,400
Speaker 1: lots of celebrities, and I know you've been famous since

565
00:21:57,400 --> 00:22:00,800
Speaker 1: you were a little boy basically, so I've really never

566
00:22:00,920 --> 00:22:03,800
Speaker 1: had a private private life. You have to kind of

567
00:22:03,800 --> 00:22:05,959
Speaker 1: really protect what is private because so much of it

568
00:22:06,040 --> 00:22:10,040
Speaker 1: is public, and now with social media, everyone there's no privacy.

569
00:22:10,280 --> 00:22:12,280
Speaker 1: And I'm not a private person. I don't care, like

570
00:22:12,320 --> 00:22:14,080
Speaker 1: I'm not trying to be private. I don't care if

571
00:22:14,119 --> 00:22:16,720
Speaker 1: people know about my personal stuff. I'm not that kind

572
00:22:16,760 --> 00:22:19,840
Speaker 1: of celebrity. But I can respect the fact that celebrities

573
00:22:19,880 --> 00:22:22,320
Speaker 1: feel that way. You know, they want they want something

574
00:22:22,320 --> 00:22:24,800
Speaker 1: that they can keep for themselves. So I get that,

575
00:22:25,640 --> 00:22:28,560
Speaker 1: but I think the true like, you know, when you

576
00:22:28,560 --> 00:22:30,520
Speaker 1: write a book like this, you kind of have to

577
00:22:30,600 --> 00:22:32,159
Speaker 1: give people something that they don't know.

578
00:22:32,760 --> 00:22:34,120
Speaker 3: It was very hard at first, and then I really

579
00:22:34,119 --> 00:22:36,640
Speaker 3: got into it and it was doing all and then

580
00:22:36,800 --> 00:22:38,320
Speaker 3: the audiobook was a trip to you.

581
00:22:38,240 --> 00:22:40,120
Speaker 1: Know, Yeah, that's annoying. I don't like. I don't love

582
00:22:40,160 --> 00:22:41,400
Speaker 1: recording that that could.

583
00:22:41,240 --> 00:22:43,040
Speaker 3: Be like thirty five days. They say it takes four

584
00:22:43,119 --> 00:22:43,520
Speaker 3: or five days.

585
00:22:43,680 --> 00:22:45,560
Speaker 1: First of all, it should not take you thirty five days.

586
00:22:45,640 --> 00:22:49,560
Speaker 1: I mean that's like an elephant's gestation period. I don't

587
00:22:49,680 --> 00:22:51,520
Speaker 1: I don't understand that should never take you.

588
00:22:51,640 --> 00:22:54,080
Speaker 3: It was my fault was rewriting it as I had

589
00:22:54,119 --> 00:22:54,840
Speaker 3: time to rewrite it.

590
00:22:54,880 --> 00:22:55,959
Speaker 1: Yeah, you know what I don't like when they give

591
00:22:56,000 --> 00:22:58,439
Speaker 1: you direction when you're recording your audiobook, but they're like,

592
00:22:58,480 --> 00:23:00,719
Speaker 1: talk more slowly. I'm like, I don't talk slowly, so

593
00:23:00,800 --> 00:23:01,960
Speaker 1: what that doesn't sound like me?

594
00:23:02,480 --> 00:23:04,320
Speaker 3: I had a good dragon. I did this thing for

595
00:23:04,359 --> 00:23:06,480
Speaker 3: Amazon that that's that didn't come out or something, but

596
00:23:06,520 --> 00:23:08,360
Speaker 3: it was it was sleep. It was first to put

597
00:23:08,359 --> 00:23:10,200
Speaker 3: people to sleep, and I was like okay, and I

598
00:23:10,280 --> 00:23:12,720
Speaker 3: didn't really know what kind of voice I The Cowboy

599
00:23:12,800 --> 00:23:15,800
Speaker 3: and the Horse. Can you slow it down a little bit? People, okay,

600
00:23:16,160 --> 00:23:19,320
Speaker 3: the Cowboy and the Horse. Could you, sorry, Dan, can

601
00:23:19,359 --> 00:23:21,720
Speaker 3: you less inflection? We're trying to put people to sleep.

602
00:23:21,480 --> 00:23:23,879
Speaker 1: And the night up. All right, we're going to take

603
00:23:23,920 --> 00:23:29,320
Speaker 1: a break and we're going to be right back. And

604
00:23:29,400 --> 00:23:32,479
Speaker 1: we're right back. We're back, John Stamos. And guess what

605
00:23:32,480 --> 00:23:34,840
Speaker 1: we're doing now. We're going going to give advice to

606
00:23:34,880 --> 00:23:36,600
Speaker 1: the strangers. Okay, that's what we're doing.

607
00:23:36,680 --> 00:23:39,240
Speaker 3: And what's and okay, the show is about giving advice.

608
00:23:39,280 --> 00:23:40,280
Speaker 1: It's called Dear Chelsea.

609
00:23:40,480 --> 00:23:43,040
Speaker 3: I know I listened to it. Do you feel you're

610
00:23:43,320 --> 00:23:44,280
Speaker 3: qualified enough to give?

611
00:23:44,520 --> 00:23:44,680
Speaker 5: No?

612
00:23:44,720 --> 00:23:46,840
Speaker 1: Okay, but that doesn't matter. And by the way, yes,

613
00:23:46,920 --> 00:23:50,919
Speaker 1: actually I am because I'm right, I read, I listen,

614
00:23:51,200 --> 00:23:53,560
Speaker 1: and I care. So I think those are really.

615
00:23:53,400 --> 00:23:55,880
Speaker 3: Your super intelligent The last time you're on Howard Stern,

616
00:23:55,920 --> 00:23:58,720
Speaker 3: I was so impressed too with you. Do you remember that?

617
00:23:59,359 --> 00:24:02,919
Speaker 1: I don't know? Okay, So anyway, Catherine, what advice do

618
00:24:02,960 --> 00:24:04,639
Speaker 1: you need from me? Well we're going to see we

619
00:24:04,680 --> 00:24:07,080
Speaker 1: have letters and we have callers. What's the first one, Catherine?

620
00:24:07,160 --> 00:24:09,320
Speaker 2: So this first one comes from sober.

621
00:24:09,760 --> 00:24:13,359
Speaker 1: Oh okay, well that's you, and then I guess your

622
00:24:13,359 --> 00:24:13,960
Speaker 1: alter ego.

623
00:24:14,119 --> 00:24:16,840
Speaker 3: Yes, it keeps me out of trouble being.

624
00:24:16,680 --> 00:24:19,480
Speaker 1: So I can see that, and I can see that

625
00:24:19,480 --> 00:24:22,760
Speaker 1: that you get into trouble. I don't get into.

626
00:24:22,600 --> 00:24:24,760
Speaker 3: That much trouble. I would tell me this though, in

627
00:24:24,880 --> 00:24:26,880
Speaker 3: order to get into that, in order to be picked

628
00:24:26,960 --> 00:24:29,800
Speaker 3: up by some British guy with bad teeth in a bar,

629
00:24:30,440 --> 00:24:31,919
Speaker 3: you'd have to be a little fucked up, right.

630
00:24:32,480 --> 00:24:35,920
Speaker 1: I mean I'm drinking, yeah, and yeah, sometimes I smoke weed.

631
00:24:36,000 --> 00:24:39,879
Speaker 1: Sometimes I do mushrooms, LSD. I like all sorts of microdosing,

632
00:24:39,960 --> 00:24:42,000
Speaker 1: So I do that a lot. I know you're jealous

633
00:24:42,040 --> 00:24:42,360
Speaker 1: right now.

634
00:24:42,600 --> 00:24:43,040
Speaker 3: A little bit.

635
00:24:43,119 --> 00:24:43,560
Speaker 1: I know a.

636
00:24:45,600 --> 00:24:46,119
Speaker 3: Lot of it.

637
00:24:46,280 --> 00:24:49,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't get into trouble. Trouble like, I have

638
00:24:49,080 --> 00:24:51,360
Speaker 1: a pretty good system going.

639
00:24:51,200 --> 00:24:53,920
Speaker 3: But I mean the inhibition's dropped down. Have you ever

640
00:24:53,960 --> 00:24:56,119
Speaker 3: been sober and just like met some guy in London

641
00:24:56,160 --> 00:24:59,040
Speaker 3: and ask them to come home. It takes a little

642
00:24:59,040 --> 00:25:01,399
Speaker 3: bit of right, Yeah, no, I haven't. Yeah, that was

643
00:25:01,400 --> 00:25:03,080
Speaker 3: a big part of it for me. It was. And

644
00:25:03,119 --> 00:25:05,679
Speaker 3: then you get yourself in it would be with the

645
00:25:05,680 --> 00:25:08,159
Speaker 3: wrong people and the wrong yeah type of right.

646
00:25:08,240 --> 00:25:11,520
Speaker 1: Well, I mean, yeah, wowkay good, it is trying to

647
00:25:11,520 --> 00:25:12,159
Speaker 1: get me sober.

648
00:25:12,440 --> 00:25:15,720
Speaker 3: And no, sounds like you are sounds to have a problem.

649
00:25:15,480 --> 00:25:16,439
Speaker 1: Sounds like you're jealous.

650
00:25:16,840 --> 00:25:20,040
Speaker 6: H No.

651
00:25:20,320 --> 00:25:24,000
Speaker 4: Yeah, well let's keep this guy's sober. He's says dear Chelsea.

652
00:25:24,400 --> 00:25:26,919
Speaker 4: I'm a forty four year old gay man who's newly sober.

653
00:25:27,160 --> 00:25:29,400
Speaker 4: I started using drugs and alcohol when I was fifteen

654
00:25:29,440 --> 00:25:31,840
Speaker 4: and took to them right away. I loved the feeling

655
00:25:31,920 --> 00:25:33,760
Speaker 4: of being drunk or high, and I felt like it

656
00:25:33,800 --> 00:25:36,760
Speaker 4: took away all my problems. At first, I used socially,

657
00:25:36,840 --> 00:25:39,199
Speaker 4: and for many years it wasn't a problem in my life.

658
00:25:39,280 --> 00:25:41,199
Speaker 4: But after about twenty years it cut up with me

659
00:25:41,240 --> 00:25:43,560
Speaker 4: and turned into abuse. I hit my low when I

660
00:25:43,600 --> 00:25:46,440
Speaker 4: lost a really big job. I've been sober for ten

661
00:25:46,480 --> 00:25:48,680
Speaker 4: months now and plan to stay that way. My drug

662
00:25:48,760 --> 00:25:50,679
Speaker 4: use became such a daily part of my life. I

663
00:25:50,720 --> 00:25:52,919
Speaker 4: had something come up and something to come down, and

664
00:25:52,960 --> 00:25:55,480
Speaker 4: something to go really up and something to go really down.

665
00:25:56,000 --> 00:26:01,000
Speaker 4: I'm not working right now, by the way. No, but

666
00:26:01,119 --> 00:26:02,640
Speaker 4: you do mention in your book. You were like, yeah,

667
00:26:02,640 --> 00:26:05,159
Speaker 4: it was my own pharmises. I don't have a boyfriend,

668
00:26:05,200 --> 00:26:07,120
Speaker 4: and I'm not working right now, and I'm really missing

669
00:26:07,200 --> 00:26:10,359
Speaker 4: drugs and alcohol a lot. I'm having trouble finding joy

670
00:26:10,480 --> 00:26:13,240
Speaker 4: without my vices and worried I'll never have fun again.

671
00:26:13,720 --> 00:26:16,359
Speaker 4: Daily life and socializing seems boring to me. I know

672
00:26:16,440 --> 00:26:18,760
Speaker 4: you enjoyed drugs socially and thought you could help shed

673
00:26:18,760 --> 00:26:21,560
Speaker 4: some light on my scenario. Best sober, Oh, this is

674
00:26:21,600 --> 00:26:24,320
Speaker 4: perfect time. Just this is for you to answer because you.

675
00:26:24,880 --> 00:26:26,800
Speaker 1: Know you have to speak to sobriety. I'm the one

676
00:26:26,800 --> 00:26:29,000
Speaker 1: who still uses and you don't, so.

677
00:26:28,920 --> 00:26:30,280
Speaker 3: You have to you do half of it. Then I'll

678
00:26:30,320 --> 00:26:30,760
Speaker 3: do this.

679
00:26:30,880 --> 00:26:33,639
Speaker 1: Well, okay, I would say that if you've been listen,

680
00:26:33,760 --> 00:26:36,560
Speaker 1: if drugs have caused you to lose a job, to

681
00:26:36,640 --> 00:26:39,240
Speaker 1: lose anything important in your life, you've made the right

682
00:26:39,320 --> 00:26:41,919
Speaker 1: decision by getting sober. For ten months you've been sober.

683
00:26:42,000 --> 00:26:44,399
Speaker 1: Do not throw that in the garbage. You need to

684
00:26:44,400 --> 00:26:47,439
Speaker 1: stay sober. And this is a test. These tests come

685
00:26:47,520 --> 00:26:50,159
Speaker 1: up all the time, right with sobriety, with life, with

686
00:26:50,280 --> 00:26:52,439
Speaker 1: ever you have to have. You can't do something for

687
00:26:52,480 --> 00:26:54,320
Speaker 1: ten months and expect your whole world to change and

688
00:26:54,359 --> 00:26:56,400
Speaker 1: for everything to be perfect for the rest of your life.

689
00:26:56,520 --> 00:26:58,600
Speaker 1: You're feeling down, and then this is a test for

690
00:26:58,680 --> 00:27:00,919
Speaker 1: you to get through to the other side, and I

691
00:27:01,000 --> 00:27:03,400
Speaker 1: promise there will be late at the end of this tunnel.

692
00:27:03,480 --> 00:27:04,040
Speaker 3: I've seen it.

693
00:27:04,359 --> 00:27:07,360
Speaker 1: Yes, speak to sobriety and that's it.

694
00:27:07,320 --> 00:27:10,720
Speaker 3: Exactly, And that was that same way you you were, sir, what's.

695
00:27:10,520 --> 00:27:12,720
Speaker 2: The same sold Just yeah, he just said sober.

696
00:27:12,640 --> 00:27:14,399
Speaker 3: Hang on, just hold on, hold on, holy because it

697
00:27:14,440 --> 00:27:16,159
Speaker 3: does get better. It's hard at first because all of

698
00:27:16,160 --> 00:27:18,399
Speaker 3: a sudden, when you're not doing drugs and drinking, all

699
00:27:18,440 --> 00:27:20,080
Speaker 3: you have is yourself and you're just like, oh, and

700
00:27:20,119 --> 00:27:22,800
Speaker 3: your life is probably pretty shitty from all that. And

701
00:27:22,800 --> 00:27:24,000
Speaker 3: then you go, well, what do I have? What am

702
00:27:24,000 --> 00:27:25,760
Speaker 3: my wife stay sober? What am I staying sober for?

703
00:27:25,800 --> 00:27:26,359
Speaker 3: I have nothing?

704
00:27:26,520 --> 00:27:29,119
Speaker 1: And also, don't define yourself like even you signing the

705
00:27:29,200 --> 00:27:31,359
Speaker 1: letter is sober, writing the letter is sober. It's like,

706
00:27:31,720 --> 00:27:33,879
Speaker 1: that's a very one dimensional way to look at yourself.

707
00:27:33,880 --> 00:27:36,439
Speaker 1: You're so much more than your sobriety. Even though the

708
00:27:36,480 --> 00:27:39,120
Speaker 1: sobriety is the most important thing for you to continue

709
00:27:39,200 --> 00:27:42,040
Speaker 1: doing right now, you're more than that. And once you

710
00:27:42,080 --> 00:27:45,359
Speaker 1: get through the like challenges of remaining sober, because the

711
00:27:45,400 --> 00:27:48,240
Speaker 1: first year is the most difficult, they say, and it's true.

712
00:27:48,280 --> 00:27:52,120
Speaker 1: I'm sure I can only imagine that you are tested

713
00:27:52,160 --> 00:27:54,960
Speaker 1: and tempted so many times. Once you get through this year,

714
00:27:55,080 --> 00:27:58,879
Speaker 1: I promise you you will feel differently about your sobriety

715
00:27:58,920 --> 00:28:01,320
Speaker 1: and it won't be such a teen isn't that right? John?

716
00:28:01,320 --> 00:28:04,080
Speaker 3: One percent? And when the good things come to you,

717
00:28:04,119 --> 00:28:05,639
Speaker 3: and they will, I promise you they will. You go

718
00:28:05,760 --> 00:28:07,920
Speaker 3: to say the course, then you go, oh, I don't,

719
00:28:08,119 --> 00:28:10,440
Speaker 3: and they start to outweigh the you know, the drinking

720
00:28:10,480 --> 00:28:13,000
Speaker 3: and the drinking like we just said, it just would

721
00:28:13,040 --> 00:28:15,240
Speaker 3: take me down the I would, It would low hanging

722
00:28:15,280 --> 00:28:18,080
Speaker 3: fruit good. I'll take three of those, not and just

723
00:28:18,119 --> 00:28:20,000
Speaker 3: the comfort it brings you at the moment. But then

724
00:28:20,000 --> 00:28:21,439
Speaker 3: the next day you wake up, oh shit, I got

725
00:28:21,520 --> 00:28:22,920
Speaker 3: nothing matter what am I doing here?

726
00:28:23,280 --> 00:28:23,440
Speaker 5: All?

727
00:28:23,480 --> 00:28:24,960
Speaker 3: I wanted my whole life? Man, I don't know, but

728
00:28:25,040 --> 00:28:27,120
Speaker 3: this gentleman. I just wanted a family. I wanted kids.

729
00:28:27,320 --> 00:28:29,120
Speaker 3: I wanted a wife. I wanted someone who I loved.

730
00:28:29,119 --> 00:28:31,440
Speaker 3: My parents were great, you know, they had a good relationship,

731
00:28:31,760 --> 00:28:34,440
Speaker 3: and that's what I wanted. And it finally came to me.

732
00:28:34,480 --> 00:28:36,400
Speaker 3: But it would not have come if I slipped after

733
00:28:36,480 --> 00:28:39,720
Speaker 3: ten months or a year and people could see it

734
00:28:39,760 --> 00:28:41,800
Speaker 3: on me, you know, And when I stopped and I

735
00:28:41,840 --> 00:28:43,760
Speaker 3: could be clear and like you do. And now you

736
00:28:43,800 --> 00:28:45,479
Speaker 3: have it where you could just look at someone and

737
00:28:45,560 --> 00:28:48,360
Speaker 3: just be honest and boom boom, then the good stuff comes.

738
00:28:48,480 --> 00:28:49,920
Speaker 3: My wife would have run for the hills if she

739
00:28:49,960 --> 00:28:51,880
Speaker 3: saw how you know how it was before. I thought

740
00:28:51,880 --> 00:28:52,960
Speaker 3: it was cool, man, it was funny.

741
00:28:53,240 --> 00:28:54,800
Speaker 1: I know, it's so funny. I had a friend that

742
00:28:54,880 --> 00:28:56,560
Speaker 1: was telling me the story. We were in my arca

743
00:28:56,560 --> 00:28:58,920
Speaker 1: this summer. A girlfriend of mine and I were and

744
00:28:58,960 --> 00:29:01,280
Speaker 1: she was saying she was taking some drug. I forget

745
00:29:01,320 --> 00:29:03,080
Speaker 1: what it was called. I didn't, I didn't, I wasn't

746
00:29:03,080 --> 00:29:05,840
Speaker 1: even familiar with it. But she was taking some street drug,

747
00:29:06,200 --> 00:29:09,200
Speaker 1: smoking something that's not very popular, but like in certain

748
00:29:09,240 --> 00:29:11,760
Speaker 1: areas of the country it is. Anyway, she was smoking,

749
00:29:11,760 --> 00:29:13,400
Speaker 1: and she thought she was crushing it, you know, she

750
00:29:13,480 --> 00:29:16,040
Speaker 1: thought she was going out being entertaining, having these nic

751
00:29:16,480 --> 00:29:19,440
Speaker 1: where she was so funny and so awesome and charming.

752
00:29:19,480 --> 00:29:21,080
Speaker 1: And she goes and then her friend took a video

753
00:29:21,160 --> 00:29:24,280
Speaker 1: and she was basically passed out, knotted out the entire

754
00:29:24,320 --> 00:29:26,760
Speaker 1: dinner like this, just sitting with her head down. And

755
00:29:26,800 --> 00:29:28,920
Speaker 1: she thought she had crushed that night. And she saw

756
00:29:28,920 --> 00:29:31,240
Speaker 1: that video and she never did that drug again, which

757
00:29:31,280 --> 00:29:33,080
Speaker 1: is a good way to keep people sober.

758
00:29:34,280 --> 00:29:36,480
Speaker 3: I know, I saw this shit like I was slumped

759
00:29:36,520 --> 00:29:39,160
Speaker 3: over in my car when the cops came and TMZ

760
00:29:39,360 --> 00:29:40,800
Speaker 3: has it. All I have to do is look at

761
00:29:40,840 --> 00:29:42,960
Speaker 3: that picture for one second. It makes me so second

762
00:29:43,040 --> 00:29:44,960
Speaker 3: kind of killed. I'm a fucking terrible man. And it

763
00:29:45,000 --> 00:29:46,480
Speaker 3: was on my way to go meet Sago by the

764
00:29:46,520 --> 00:29:49,480
Speaker 3: way with the palm, so I blame him. But I

765
00:29:49,520 --> 00:29:51,040
Speaker 3: want to say a little bit about my wife too,

766
00:29:51,040 --> 00:29:53,560
Speaker 3: because I'm making jokes and stuff about her. She is

767
00:29:53,560 --> 00:29:57,320
Speaker 3: the most wonderful. She's, first of all, the greatest mother sent,

768
00:29:57,680 --> 00:29:59,640
Speaker 3: maybe as good as my mom, and that says a lot.

769
00:30:00,000 --> 00:30:02,160
Speaker 3: And the conversation that we have in our house now

770
00:30:02,280 --> 00:30:05,560
Speaker 3: is so smart and so you know, sharp of politics,

771
00:30:05,600 --> 00:30:08,160
Speaker 3: about the world, about you know. My son's a flirt,

772
00:30:08,200 --> 00:30:10,200
Speaker 3: and he's more like her. I was not a flirt

773
00:30:10,240 --> 00:30:12,320
Speaker 3: at five five and a half. But he's terrible. He's

774
00:30:12,360 --> 00:30:14,480
Speaker 3: like her. He's always got. It was my birthday and

775
00:30:14,520 --> 00:30:16,760
Speaker 3: the other four or five girls bella stella, you know,

776
00:30:16,960 --> 00:30:18,640
Speaker 3: and he's looking at me like, Dad, help him. You

777
00:30:18,680 --> 00:30:20,920
Speaker 3: got yourself into this. But we were at Disney and

778
00:30:20,960 --> 00:30:23,200
Speaker 3: we were embarrassed in a couple.

779
00:30:22,960 --> 00:30:25,560
Speaker 1: Of in August and Disney World there too.

780
00:30:25,600 --> 00:30:28,840
Speaker 3: Yeah, have a great test so much? No, I mean anyway,

781
00:30:28,920 --> 00:30:30,920
Speaker 3: So we're there and one we're there for two days.

782
00:30:30,960 --> 00:30:33,000
Speaker 3: One day we have a guide. She was a nice woman,

783
00:30:33,280 --> 00:30:35,600
Speaker 3: maybe fifty to fifty five, got of just a normal

784
00:30:35,680 --> 00:30:37,960
Speaker 3: and he didn't really pay attention. Day two we have

785
00:30:38,040 --> 00:30:40,960
Speaker 3: this thirty year old hot French girl and he's like, well,

786
00:30:41,640 --> 00:30:43,920
Speaker 3: and his plays and I can't do this because I'm

787
00:30:43,920 --> 00:30:46,000
Speaker 3: married now, but it's pretty good. It's like sola, what's

788
00:30:46,040 --> 00:30:48,960
Speaker 3: my favorite color, what's my favorite food?

789
00:30:49,000 --> 00:30:49,160
Speaker 5: You know?

790
00:30:49,240 --> 00:30:51,040
Speaker 3: And I'm like, can't you do better than that? Son?

791
00:30:51,280 --> 00:30:53,880
Speaker 3: And so he then I over here him saying I

792
00:30:53,920 --> 00:30:55,600
Speaker 3: have his girlfriend and her name is Bella and she's

793
00:30:55,600 --> 00:30:58,480
Speaker 3: really cute and she lives down the street. And then

794
00:30:58,600 --> 00:31:01,960
Speaker 3: the guides at each the rest of me. She walks

795
00:31:01,960 --> 00:31:04,040
Speaker 3: away just as she gets out of earshot. I swear

796
00:31:04,040 --> 00:31:05,960
Speaker 3: to god, he goes, why did I tell her I

797
00:31:05,960 --> 00:31:10,239
Speaker 3: have a girlfriend. But my point to that was that

798
00:31:10,240 --> 00:31:13,360
Speaker 3: we have these great conversations and we are very clear

799
00:31:13,360 --> 00:31:15,959
Speaker 3: with him that no means no and respect women. And

800
00:31:16,680 --> 00:31:18,720
Speaker 3: we didn't have that conversation in my home, but my

801
00:31:18,840 --> 00:31:21,120
Speaker 3: dad was that. My dad was so respectful to my

802
00:31:21,160 --> 00:31:23,160
Speaker 3: sisters and to my mom, and never held she wanted

803
00:31:23,160 --> 00:31:24,880
Speaker 3: to be a housewife and it was beautiful, and he

804
00:31:24,920 --> 00:31:27,440
Speaker 3: never held that over her. He never thought money or

805
00:31:27,480 --> 00:31:28,960
Speaker 3: anything like. He always thought that she had the more

806
00:31:29,000 --> 00:31:31,480
Speaker 3: important job, which she did. Stay sober, buddy, because you

807
00:31:31,520 --> 00:31:33,360
Speaker 3: know it's the thing. It's it's not easy. You know,

808
00:31:33,360 --> 00:31:34,200
Speaker 3: it's not easy thing.

809
00:31:34,240 --> 00:31:35,960
Speaker 1: Well, we're going to go on to our next question. Yeah,

810
00:31:36,040 --> 00:31:38,040
Speaker 1: so let's let's move on to the next one.

811
00:31:38,280 --> 00:31:41,480
Speaker 4: Well, our next question comes from Chloe. She is joining

812
00:31:41,560 --> 00:31:42,960
Speaker 4: us here. She is Chloe with a kay.

813
00:31:43,200 --> 00:31:46,360
Speaker 1: Chloe, my neighbor, was supposed to come on this podcast.

814
00:31:46,640 --> 00:31:49,040
Speaker 1: Friends with Them Chloe, I mean yeah, I mean I

815
00:31:49,120 --> 00:31:52,200
Speaker 1: like Chloe. She's cute and sweet. She's the taller one,

816
00:31:52,360 --> 00:31:54,720
Speaker 1: the taller one, they're all very sweet. You can't say

817
00:31:54,760 --> 00:31:56,120
Speaker 1: that they're not nice and smart.

818
00:31:56,640 --> 00:31:58,000
Speaker 3: Whoever's making a dough for them.

819
00:31:58,360 --> 00:32:03,640
Speaker 4: Anyway, Well, Chloe says, I need your advice. I'm currently

820
00:32:03,640 --> 00:32:05,800
Speaker 4: in love with one of my best friends. I know

821
00:32:05,920 --> 00:32:07,640
Speaker 4: Taylor as old as time. And I actually did not

822
00:32:07,720 --> 00:32:09,560
Speaker 4: pick this one for the Disney reference. I just thought

823
00:32:09,560 --> 00:32:10,360
Speaker 4: it'd be a fun one.

824
00:32:10,720 --> 00:32:12,800
Speaker 2: I noticed my feelings for him about a year ago.

825
00:32:13,080 --> 00:32:16,920
Speaker 3: You're wearing a Mickey Mouse shirt looking she loves Disney World.

826
00:32:19,640 --> 00:32:23,040
Speaker 1: Because she knows how I feel about it, and Chelsea,

827
00:32:23,200 --> 00:32:26,800
Speaker 1: that's why n No, I don't want to bother you

828
00:32:26,840 --> 00:32:29,960
Speaker 1: with these fucking Disney Worlds. I mean, that was the

829
00:32:30,000 --> 00:32:32,360
Speaker 1: most upsetting part of your book to me, was the Disney.

830
00:32:33,800 --> 00:32:33,960
Speaker 4: No.

831
00:32:34,040 --> 00:32:37,160
Speaker 1: I just personally, I was like, really, this is what

832
00:32:37,160 --> 00:32:39,080
Speaker 1: you're doing in your spare time. I mean that was

833
00:32:39,440 --> 00:32:42,240
Speaker 1: I was. I was flabbergasted. Really, yeah, I didn't.

834
00:32:42,040 --> 00:32:43,440
Speaker 3: Know I used to go and take drugs there. You

835
00:32:43,440 --> 00:32:44,400
Speaker 3: would have liked that, Yeah.

836
00:32:44,240 --> 00:32:45,760
Speaker 1: I would have liked that version of you better.

837
00:32:45,840 --> 00:32:51,240
Speaker 3: Yeah, Key and the and the hair, Yes is focus.

838
00:32:51,440 --> 00:32:53,960
Speaker 3: That's the color of the tank top that I wore

839
00:32:54,000 --> 00:32:58,560
Speaker 3: in the Cocomo video.

840
00:32:58,080 --> 00:33:04,840
Speaker 1: That was a good song. So it's still okay, go

841
00:33:04,960 --> 00:33:08,760
Speaker 1: on solo, John, stay focused, focused, but just try and

842
00:33:08,960 --> 00:33:11,520
Speaker 1: listen to these are about the callers about to get

843
00:33:11,560 --> 00:33:12,600
Speaker 1: raising Bobby questions.

844
00:33:13,520 --> 00:33:14,120
Speaker 3: Where are they.

845
00:33:16,000 --> 00:33:16,400
Speaker 1: Come on?

846
00:33:16,840 --> 00:33:16,959
Speaker 4: You?

847
00:33:17,040 --> 00:33:19,200
Speaker 1: Just stay focused and watch what happens.

848
00:33:19,880 --> 00:33:22,040
Speaker 4: So I noticed my feelings for him about a year

849
00:33:22,080 --> 00:33:24,000
Speaker 4: ago and didn't want to act on them because he's

850
00:33:24,040 --> 00:33:26,640
Speaker 4: part of my core group of friends. We recently went

851
00:33:26,680 --> 00:33:29,080
Speaker 4: on a trip to celebrate a friend's thirtieth birthday, and

852
00:33:29,160 --> 00:33:31,120
Speaker 4: since we were the only single people in the group,

853
00:33:31,200 --> 00:33:33,960
Speaker 4: we were put in the singles room together and well,

854
00:33:33,960 --> 00:33:36,120
Speaker 4: after many cocktails, we ended up hooking up.

855
00:33:36,560 --> 00:33:38,400
Speaker 2: I need your advice on what to do next.

856
00:33:38,960 --> 00:33:41,120
Speaker 4: His best friend told me that I'm his dream girl,

857
00:33:41,120 --> 00:33:43,120
Speaker 4: but he's hesitant to make a move because he doesn't

858
00:33:43,120 --> 00:33:46,280
Speaker 4: want to lose our friendship. I initiated the hookup. Do

859
00:33:46,360 --> 00:33:48,720
Speaker 4: I need to also initiate the next move? And do

860
00:33:48,800 --> 00:33:50,680
Speaker 4: I tell him how I feel or risk losing our

861
00:33:50,680 --> 00:33:51,680
Speaker 4: friendship forever?

862
00:33:51,960 --> 00:33:54,040
Speaker 1: Chloe, this is the first time you've been one step

863
00:33:54,080 --> 00:33:57,800
Speaker 1: ahead of me the entire the entire episode. John just

864
00:33:57,840 --> 00:34:01,200
Speaker 1: put on his headphones before I did, and that was pretty.

865
00:34:01,040 --> 00:34:03,120
Speaker 3: Quick, or observen I've I've had him since I walked

866
00:34:03,120 --> 00:34:03,600
Speaker 3: in the room.

867
00:34:03,880 --> 00:34:06,240
Speaker 1: Chloe, Hi, Hi, Chloe, how are you?

868
00:34:06,680 --> 00:34:07,400
Speaker 6: I'm doing great?

869
00:34:07,440 --> 00:34:07,800
Speaker 2: How are you?

870
00:34:07,840 --> 00:34:09,160
Speaker 1: Guys? Chloe with a K.

871
00:34:09,680 --> 00:34:10,440
Speaker 6: Chloe with the K.

872
00:34:13,480 --> 00:34:15,640
Speaker 1: Is our special guest and he's going to start to

873
00:34:15,680 --> 00:34:18,240
Speaker 1: ask you a series of questions. I'm right to referred

874
00:34:18,239 --> 00:34:20,160
Speaker 1: to it as a barrage.

875
00:34:20,160 --> 00:34:22,400
Speaker 3: But so so how long have you been close? Like

876
00:34:22,440 --> 00:34:23,880
Speaker 3: how does that? Have you ever fall in love with

877
00:34:23,880 --> 00:34:24,279
Speaker 3: a friend?

878
00:34:24,400 --> 00:34:24,600
Speaker 5: Yeah?

879
00:34:24,680 --> 00:34:26,279
Speaker 1: Yeah, I've had sex with them and thought I was

880
00:34:26,320 --> 00:34:27,280
Speaker 1: in love with them, And then.

881
00:34:27,480 --> 00:34:28,879
Speaker 3: Are you in love with him? Do you love him?

882
00:34:29,040 --> 00:34:32,000
Speaker 6: I definitely do. He's the dream of man, He's the

883
00:34:32,000 --> 00:34:32,960
Speaker 6: total package.

884
00:34:33,360 --> 00:34:36,000
Speaker 1: Well, she's worried about his family, his reaction and if

885
00:34:36,000 --> 00:34:38,200
Speaker 1: he feels the same way because he's a little bit

886
00:34:38,200 --> 00:34:40,880
Speaker 1: more trepidacious than she is. Right, yes, exactly.

887
00:34:41,000 --> 00:34:45,840
Speaker 3: You guys hooked up, right, and so afterwards was it like, uh,

888
00:34:45,960 --> 00:34:48,600
Speaker 3: you know, like straight up you know, like like why

889
00:34:48,600 --> 00:34:49,120
Speaker 3: do we do that?

890
00:34:49,480 --> 00:34:52,040
Speaker 6: Or No, not at all. It was just very much

891
00:34:52,160 --> 00:34:54,960
Speaker 6: like I think we're both in the zone of, well

892
00:34:54,960 --> 00:34:57,480
Speaker 6: we did that. Now we either go back to just

893
00:34:57,640 --> 00:35:02,360
Speaker 6: being completely friends, or we naga maybe of friends with benefits,

894
00:35:02,360 --> 00:35:05,600
Speaker 6: a relationship, whatever that next step would be.

895
00:35:05,880 --> 00:35:07,920
Speaker 1: Would you be okay with friends with benefits?

896
00:35:08,600 --> 00:35:09,640
Speaker 6: I wouldn't be opposed.

897
00:35:10,840 --> 00:35:13,040
Speaker 3: Oh is he there? Can we talk to him?

898
00:35:13,440 --> 00:35:16,879
Speaker 1: No, he's not here, obviously not there about it?

899
00:35:17,840 --> 00:35:18,520
Speaker 3: Or is a teacher?

900
00:35:18,960 --> 00:35:19,720
Speaker 2: That's very cute.

901
00:35:19,880 --> 00:35:21,280
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's beautiful, that's cute.

902
00:35:21,320 --> 00:35:23,040
Speaker 1: I think you should just listen. I think there's only

903
00:35:23,080 --> 00:35:25,480
Speaker 1: one avenue forward, and you just need to make this happen.

904
00:35:25,680 --> 00:35:27,080
Speaker 1: I think you need to just go to him and

905
00:35:27,160 --> 00:35:29,319
Speaker 1: be very honest about how strong your feelings are. You

906
00:35:29,360 --> 00:35:31,359
Speaker 1: just said you love him, you feel like you're in

907
00:35:31,360 --> 00:35:35,279
Speaker 1: love with him? Yes, yeah, go for it. Go tell

908
00:35:35,360 --> 00:35:37,600
Speaker 1: him you know what's he gonna and if he says

909
00:35:37,640 --> 00:35:39,920
Speaker 1: no and he resists it, then be like listen, You've

910
00:35:39,920 --> 00:35:42,960
Speaker 1: told him your truth. Hopefully he will come to his senses.

911
00:35:43,200 --> 00:35:47,080
Speaker 1: But you can't move forward without honesty. You only get

912
00:35:47,120 --> 00:35:49,120
Speaker 1: to live once. You should just go take a leap

913
00:35:49,160 --> 00:35:51,360
Speaker 1: of faith and hope that it works out. And it

914
00:35:51,400 --> 00:35:52,160
Speaker 1: probably will.

915
00:35:52,400 --> 00:35:55,720
Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah, I just needed a little a little push

916
00:35:55,760 --> 00:35:58,080
Speaker 6: in that direction because all of my friends are very

917
00:35:58,560 --> 00:36:01,920
Speaker 6: wishy washy on maybe you should, maybe you shouldn't.

918
00:36:02,160 --> 00:36:04,880
Speaker 1: But what advantage would you have by not saying anything?

919
00:36:05,400 --> 00:36:08,120
Speaker 6: Nothing, No advantage. We would be stuck in the unknown.

920
00:36:08,400 --> 00:36:09,680
Speaker 3: Does he listen to this podcast?

921
00:36:10,080 --> 00:36:12,640
Speaker 1: No, he's a straight man. You're the only straight man

922
00:36:12,680 --> 00:36:15,200
Speaker 1: that listens to this. Listen. I think it's good to

923
00:36:15,239 --> 00:36:17,600
Speaker 1: take life by the balls and have balls, you know

924
00:36:17,600 --> 00:36:19,560
Speaker 1: what I mean? And I think by you calling in,

925
00:36:19,719 --> 00:36:22,120
Speaker 1: is you trying to just get your balls in the

926
00:36:22,200 --> 00:36:24,680
Speaker 1: right order. And I want to tell you they're in

927
00:36:24,719 --> 00:36:27,000
Speaker 1: the right order. Go for it. I don't think you're

928
00:36:27,040 --> 00:36:29,720
Speaker 1: ever gonna regret speaking your truth to somebody and saying

929
00:36:29,719 --> 00:36:33,120
Speaker 1: and proclaiming your love or adoration and saying, let's go

930
00:36:33,239 --> 00:36:35,880
Speaker 1: for it. There's nothing set in stone. We don't have

931
00:36:35,920 --> 00:36:38,360
Speaker 1: to commit to each other. We're not getting married, but

932
00:36:38,400 --> 00:36:40,440
Speaker 1: we're both gonna try and have a relationship and see

933
00:36:40,440 --> 00:36:43,400
Speaker 1: where we go and if it works out, fucking awesome,

934
00:36:43,480 --> 00:36:45,480
Speaker 1: and if it doesn't work out, we'll always try to

935
00:36:45,480 --> 00:36:46,240
Speaker 1: remain friends.

936
00:36:46,640 --> 00:36:50,640
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's great about tomorrow. Like you said, you gotta

937
00:36:50,640 --> 00:36:51,279
Speaker 3: fucking go for it.

938
00:36:51,320 --> 00:36:52,680
Speaker 1: How are you gonna do it? How are you gonna

939
00:36:52,680 --> 00:36:53,040
Speaker 1: tell him?

940
00:36:53,080 --> 00:36:54,000
Speaker 3: Do you want us to do it?

941
00:36:54,120 --> 00:36:57,320
Speaker 6: I have started a little text note in my phone

942
00:36:57,400 --> 00:36:59,640
Speaker 6: of things I was gonna say, and then I deleted

943
00:36:59,640 --> 00:37:03,600
Speaker 6: it and I restarted, and so far it's I think

944
00:37:04,640 --> 00:37:06,919
Speaker 6: you know that I like you something along those lines,

945
00:37:06,960 --> 00:37:09,839
Speaker 6: because it's very I'm not being hidden about it. I'm

946
00:37:09,840 --> 00:37:11,719
Speaker 6: not being coy about it. He knows that I find

947
00:37:11,800 --> 00:37:14,480
Speaker 6: him attractive, he knows that I like him. So I

948
00:37:14,480 --> 00:37:18,719
Speaker 6: think it's just again me taking the initiative and being like, hey,

949
00:37:18,760 --> 00:37:19,640
Speaker 6: what should we do?

950
00:37:19,680 --> 00:37:19,879
Speaker 5: Now?

951
00:37:20,080 --> 00:37:20,719
Speaker 6: What are we doing?

952
00:37:21,320 --> 00:37:23,560
Speaker 2: H But like, I don't think this is a text, right,

953
00:37:23,800 --> 00:37:25,919
Speaker 2: Like this is a like invite him out? Go to dinner.

954
00:37:25,960 --> 00:37:27,840
Speaker 1: No, no, no, no, this is a face to face And

955
00:37:27,960 --> 00:37:30,520
Speaker 1: don't be like this is coming from somebody who's a

956
00:37:30,640 --> 00:37:35,880
Speaker 1: very dominant personality. You don't have to make him agree

957
00:37:35,920 --> 00:37:38,920
Speaker 1: to anything. You just are inviting him to join you

958
00:37:39,239 --> 00:37:42,160
Speaker 1: in this relationship. It's not like this is how I feel,

959
00:37:42,200 --> 00:37:43,839
Speaker 1: this is what's going to happen. I don't think you're

960
00:37:43,840 --> 00:37:45,719
Speaker 1: going to say it that way, but I don't want

961
00:37:45,760 --> 00:37:48,480
Speaker 1: you to confuse what I'm saying with that you want

962
00:37:48,480 --> 00:37:50,320
Speaker 1: to go in and say this is how I feel.

963
00:37:50,480 --> 00:37:52,600
Speaker 1: I want to start something with you. I would like

964
00:37:52,719 --> 00:37:55,879
Speaker 1: to have us try a relationship and with the understanding

965
00:37:55,960 --> 00:37:58,320
Speaker 1: that if it doesn't work out, we will remain friends.

966
00:37:58,600 --> 00:38:01,439
Speaker 1: We can both be very mature about this. And let's

967
00:38:01,480 --> 00:38:03,480
Speaker 1: not go into this assuming it's all going to be

968
00:38:03,520 --> 00:38:07,000
Speaker 1: sunshine and roses, because that's a big mistake people make too.

969
00:38:07,360 --> 00:38:09,440
Speaker 1: And at the first sign of like a difficult time.

970
00:38:09,520 --> 00:38:11,160
Speaker 1: You know some people, you want to be able to

971
00:38:11,200 --> 00:38:14,040
Speaker 1: know that they can handle that in your relationship and

972
00:38:14,160 --> 00:38:17,560
Speaker 1: handle difficult conversations and blah blah blah. So it's not

973
00:38:17,600 --> 00:38:21,400
Speaker 1: like you're signing up to get married. Yeasant, love is blind,

974
00:38:22,440 --> 00:38:25,799
Speaker 1: Yeah right, we barely know you, but I think he's lucky.

975
00:38:25,840 --> 00:38:27,680
Speaker 3: You'd be lucky to have you. Oh you seem like

976
00:38:27,680 --> 00:38:28,520
Speaker 3: a really good person.

977
00:38:28,680 --> 00:38:29,120
Speaker 6: Thank you.

978
00:38:29,320 --> 00:38:29,920
Speaker 1: I agree.

979
00:38:30,800 --> 00:38:32,600
Speaker 3: What is that on? What can you figure? What's that

980
00:38:32,719 --> 00:38:35,320
Speaker 3: on the side? There is that? That's a screen or puppets?

981
00:38:36,200 --> 00:38:37,840
Speaker 6: It's a ball ross finger puppet.

982
00:38:40,680 --> 00:38:43,520
Speaker 1: That's cue and your finger blast and your finger puppet

983
00:38:43,600 --> 00:38:46,319
Speaker 1: right now, that's a finger blast. You know what that is, John,

984
00:38:46,360 --> 00:38:47,080
Speaker 1: A finger blast?

985
00:38:47,200 --> 00:38:50,880
Speaker 3: That's a Oh yeah, I'm doing it right now to myself.

986
00:38:51,719 --> 00:38:54,200
Speaker 1: Thank you for calling in, Thank you for calling in,

987
00:38:54,360 --> 00:38:56,480
Speaker 1: Thank you for showing us your puppet, thank you for

988
00:38:56,560 --> 00:38:59,400
Speaker 1: dealing with Thank you for dealing with John Ranks. And

989
00:38:59,680 --> 00:39:02,840
Speaker 1: keep posted let us know what happens. Okay, Yeah, totally,

990
00:39:02,880 --> 00:39:07,000
Speaker 1: thank you so much. Love you guys. Yeah, absolutely more.

991
00:39:07,440 --> 00:39:11,200
Speaker 1: Sorry John, but Chelsea, all right, cut off. So I

992
00:39:11,239 --> 00:39:11,880
Speaker 1: just want to finish.

993
00:39:13,200 --> 00:39:14,880
Speaker 3: I think she was gonna say me, how do you

994
00:39:14,960 --> 00:39:17,440
Speaker 3: keep your balls? Or what were you saying? Get your

995
00:39:17,600 --> 00:39:18,560
Speaker 3: I think you're all mixing.

996
00:39:19,719 --> 00:39:21,480
Speaker 1: It doesn't matter. I could do I could do whatever

997
00:39:21,520 --> 00:39:22,720
Speaker 1: I want. It's my podcast.

998
00:39:22,880 --> 00:39:24,800
Speaker 3: If you pray to your balls, is that sack relgious?

999
00:39:24,800 --> 00:39:28,640
Speaker 1: I think I think keeping your balls in order means flying, right,

1000
00:39:28,840 --> 00:39:31,320
Speaker 1: flying straight, you know what I mean, I'm doing it

1001
00:39:32,719 --> 00:39:34,960
Speaker 1: like you know, I'm always heading north.

1002
00:39:36,880 --> 00:39:38,960
Speaker 4: I feel like that conversation would be easier if she's

1003
00:39:39,040 --> 00:39:40,200
Speaker 4: just like hooked up with him again.

1004
00:39:40,360 --> 00:39:43,359
Speaker 3: I don't know, I could never figure out like being

1005
00:39:43,360 --> 00:39:45,279
Speaker 3: friends and all a sudden falling like one has to

1006
00:39:45,560 --> 00:39:47,920
Speaker 3: like Kimmel and Molly, like they work together a song

1007
00:39:47,960 --> 00:39:49,160
Speaker 3: and all a sudden one day they're in love with

1008
00:39:49,200 --> 00:39:51,600
Speaker 3: each other. It's interesting. One has to She's looking at

1009
00:39:51,640 --> 00:39:52,600
Speaker 3: me like I'm a fucking.

1010
00:39:52,760 --> 00:39:54,680
Speaker 1: No, I'm not. I'm just thinking like it's I mean,

1011
00:39:54,719 --> 00:39:56,680
Speaker 1: there are a million ways to fall in love. Sometimes

1012
00:39:56,680 --> 00:39:59,160
Speaker 1: it's one person. Sometimes with well, Joe Coy and me,

1013
00:39:59,320 --> 00:40:03,040
Speaker 1: I I knew he liked me a lot and had

1014
00:40:03,040 --> 00:40:05,720
Speaker 1: a crush on me, so it had to be my idea.

1015
00:40:06,239 --> 00:40:09,600
Speaker 1: But every dynamic is different, and it's kind of the

1016
00:40:09,600 --> 00:40:12,319
Speaker 1: most respectful thing to do to another person is also

1017
00:40:12,440 --> 00:40:14,880
Speaker 1: is be honest, you know, like in a relationship, like

1018
00:40:15,280 --> 00:40:17,440
Speaker 1: these are my feelings, so that they know this is

1019
00:40:17,440 --> 00:40:19,080
Speaker 1: how I feel. And if you don't feel the same way,

1020
00:40:19,120 --> 00:40:20,960
Speaker 1: like okay, we're coming from two different places, and that

1021
00:40:21,000 --> 00:40:24,200
Speaker 1: gives them an opportunity to act in kindness and you know,

1022
00:40:24,400 --> 00:40:25,239
Speaker 1: respect as well.

1023
00:40:25,440 --> 00:40:27,880
Speaker 4: Yeah, and she's gonna hate herself if she doesn't say anything,

1024
00:40:27,880 --> 00:40:29,600
Speaker 4: and then he winds up with somebody else, you know,

1025
00:40:29,640 --> 00:40:31,359
Speaker 4: and she like didn't get in there when she had

1026
00:40:31,360 --> 00:40:34,880
Speaker 4: a chance. Well, our next color. It's a little bit

1027
00:40:34,880 --> 00:40:36,759
Speaker 4: of a turn emotionally.

1028
00:40:36,840 --> 00:40:38,880
Speaker 1: But I think John's ready for anything.

1029
00:40:38,960 --> 00:40:39,279
Speaker 2: I think so.

1030
00:40:39,640 --> 00:40:41,600
Speaker 1: I think what you've demonstrated thus far is that you're

1031
00:40:41,640 --> 00:40:42,000
Speaker 1: ready for.

1032
00:40:43,600 --> 00:40:48,040
Speaker 4: Okay, right, I have to go, Beth says. I'm hoping

1033
00:40:48,040 --> 00:40:49,759
Speaker 4: to get your advice on something I think you can

1034
00:40:49,800 --> 00:40:51,960
Speaker 4: relate to. It will make sense in the end, I promise.

1035
00:40:52,640 --> 00:40:55,160
Speaker 4: When I was seven, my mom got cancer. At ten,

1036
00:40:55,480 --> 00:40:58,319
Speaker 4: my dad got cancer, and at fourteen, my mom got

1037
00:40:58,320 --> 00:41:01,200
Speaker 4: a different cancer too. I learned that my dad was

1038
00:41:01,239 --> 00:41:04,879
Speaker 4: diagnosed with his second cancer. When I was twenty five.

1039
00:41:05,000 --> 00:41:07,279
Speaker 4: My mom had to move into assisted living, and the

1040
00:41:07,320 --> 00:41:09,960
Speaker 4: next year, my dad's body lost its battle with the disease,

1041
00:41:10,280 --> 00:41:12,920
Speaker 4: and my sister and I helped him pass peacefully via hospice.

1042
00:41:13,400 --> 00:41:15,920
Speaker 4: Within the last eighteen months, I hit a triple whammy.

1043
00:41:16,280 --> 00:41:18,840
Speaker 4: My mom's body lost its battle. I turned thirty and

1044
00:41:19,000 --> 00:41:21,640
Speaker 4: ended a seven year relationship with Many people ask how

1045
00:41:21,640 --> 00:41:25,560
Speaker 4: I'm so strong, quote unquote, Well, my coping mechanism is humor.

1046
00:41:26,040 --> 00:41:28,239
Speaker 4: I often joke about using the dead parent card to

1047
00:41:28,239 --> 00:41:30,720
Speaker 4: get what I want, and I turned things into jokes

1048
00:41:30,719 --> 00:41:34,520
Speaker 4: in an attempt to help avoid making my friends uncomfortable

1049
00:41:34,520 --> 00:41:37,439
Speaker 4: with my grief. I use self deprecation to give people

1050
00:41:37,480 --> 00:41:40,680
Speaker 4: an out if my feelings are too real or heavy. Lately,

1051
00:41:40,719 --> 00:41:43,960
Speaker 4: I've realized that now nobody takes my emotion seriously anymore.

1052
00:41:44,239 --> 00:41:46,720
Speaker 4: The people who love me assume I can handle everything

1053
00:41:46,719 --> 00:41:49,440
Speaker 4: that's happened because I'm used to the trauma. This is

1054
00:41:49,480 --> 00:41:51,920
Speaker 4: where I'm hoping Chelsea can help. As a fellow strong

1055
00:41:51,960 --> 00:41:53,960
Speaker 4: woman who's been through a lot of shit, who has

1056
00:41:53,960 --> 00:41:56,680
Speaker 4: a sarcastic sense of humor and uses dead pan tones,

1057
00:41:56,840 --> 00:41:59,680
Speaker 4: how do you convey your needs when necessary? Is it

1058
00:41:59,640 --> 00:42:01,560
Speaker 4: your time on a voice? Do you do this only

1059
00:42:01,560 --> 00:42:03,759
Speaker 4: in therapy and not with your friends? I could really

1060
00:42:03,840 --> 00:42:05,680
Speaker 4: use some help to figure out how to re establish

1061
00:42:05,680 --> 00:42:07,840
Speaker 4: connections with those that I know want to support me

1062
00:42:07,960 --> 00:42:09,879
Speaker 4: without taking my own jokes on the chin.

1063
00:42:10,440 --> 00:42:12,200
Speaker 3: Hi, what's her name?

1064
00:42:12,440 --> 00:42:12,640
Speaker 1: Beth?

1065
00:42:12,800 --> 00:42:13,399
Speaker 3: Beth? Hi? Bet?

1066
00:42:13,480 --> 00:42:15,040
Speaker 1: Hi Bet? This is John Hi?

1067
00:42:15,080 --> 00:42:17,400
Speaker 3: Bet? You know Saya was the king of that and

1068
00:42:17,440 --> 00:42:19,360
Speaker 3: he would make jokes out of you know when you

1069
00:42:19,400 --> 00:42:20,799
Speaker 3: know he had a lot of tragedy in his life,

1070
00:42:20,800 --> 00:42:23,160
Speaker 3: and yeah, that was his way of getting through grief.

1071
00:42:23,200 --> 00:42:26,120
Speaker 3: And it was probably as Beth was dealing with a

1072
00:42:26,160 --> 00:42:28,360
Speaker 3: little bit. He was like that. He would use jokes

1073
00:42:28,400 --> 00:42:30,680
Speaker 3: when tragedy is strict, and he had a lot in

1074
00:42:30,680 --> 00:42:32,959
Speaker 3: his life. We didn't get along in the beginning at all.

1075
00:42:33,160 --> 00:42:34,960
Speaker 3: We had different styles and we you know, we were

1076
00:42:35,000 --> 00:42:37,960
Speaker 3: like this, but we finally when his sister, you know,

1077
00:42:38,120 --> 00:42:41,680
Speaker 3: got slurroderma and she passed away, and Dave's sister had cancer,

1078
00:42:41,840 --> 00:42:42,279
Speaker 3: and my sister.

1079
00:42:42,760 --> 00:42:45,480
Speaker 1: The chances that all three of your sisters were so sick.

1080
00:42:45,840 --> 00:42:48,600
Speaker 3: My sister made it, thank god, but theirs didn't. And

1081
00:42:48,760 --> 00:42:50,520
Speaker 3: so he would make jokes about it. And it was

1082
00:42:50,880 --> 00:42:52,879
Speaker 3: fun at first, but then it would be come on, Bob,

1083
00:42:52,920 --> 00:42:54,960
Speaker 3: you know, but that was his way. It was it

1084
00:42:55,040 --> 00:42:57,560
Speaker 3: was his only way out. But he was always there

1085
00:42:57,960 --> 00:43:00,160
Speaker 3: for someone like he would do the jokes jokes, but

1086
00:43:00,320 --> 00:43:02,200
Speaker 3: probably you are and then he was there. Then he

1087
00:43:02,239 --> 00:43:04,680
Speaker 3: became Bob and he was the most reliable guy on

1088
00:43:04,680 --> 00:43:07,520
Speaker 3: the planet. I asked him to host my father's funeral

1089
00:43:07,760 --> 00:43:09,920
Speaker 3: and he got up and started with tonight specials or

1090
00:43:09,960 --> 00:43:11,759
Speaker 3: cake and cock, and we're out of cake and I

1091
00:43:11,800 --> 00:43:14,719
Speaker 3: was like okay, and my Mom's like, oh, but we

1092
00:43:14,800 --> 00:43:17,000
Speaker 3: needed but that was a time when everybody we just

1093
00:43:17,120 --> 00:43:18,840
Speaker 3: needed to laugh and that was great. And then he

1094
00:43:18,920 --> 00:43:21,279
Speaker 3: got very serious and then after that he was right

1095
00:43:21,320 --> 00:43:23,360
Speaker 3: by my side through all of it. So maybe you

1096
00:43:23,440 --> 00:43:25,000
Speaker 3: do that, Yeah, definitely.

1097
00:43:25,040 --> 00:43:26,960
Speaker 5: And I feel like a lot of my friends that

1098
00:43:27,239 --> 00:43:29,640
Speaker 5: have tragedy in their lives too, you know, they come

1099
00:43:29,680 --> 00:43:32,400
Speaker 5: to me because they know that I've experienced it and

1100
00:43:32,440 --> 00:43:34,880
Speaker 5: I've made it through it, and I do have copying

1101
00:43:34,920 --> 00:43:38,279
Speaker 5: mechanisms that I've used. It's just this particular loss of

1102
00:43:38,320 --> 00:43:40,560
Speaker 5: the loss of my mom, you know, just six months ago,

1103
00:43:40,840 --> 00:43:43,040
Speaker 5: has hit me harder than everything else. And I think

1104
00:43:43,080 --> 00:43:45,279
Speaker 5: that they're just kind of assuming, you know, I'm going

1105
00:43:45,320 --> 00:43:47,399
Speaker 5: to stay on the same track that I have always had,

1106
00:43:47,440 --> 00:43:49,719
Speaker 5: and it's kind of like this one's different, though, and

1107
00:43:50,280 --> 00:43:52,840
Speaker 5: I really need somebody else to be there for me

1108
00:43:53,000 --> 00:43:54,319
Speaker 5: the way that I've been there for a lot.

1109
00:43:54,400 --> 00:43:57,000
Speaker 1: That you just said it perfectly, and listen, I want

1110
00:43:57,080 --> 00:43:59,959
Speaker 1: you to think you're in therapy. You said yes, yes, yes, okay,

1111
00:44:00,400 --> 00:44:02,200
Speaker 1: So I want you to think this is a whole

1112
00:44:02,239 --> 00:44:04,600
Speaker 1: new chapter in your life. You've lost your mother and

1113
00:44:04,600 --> 00:44:07,280
Speaker 1: that's been the biggest blow. But you've had a million blows.

1114
00:44:07,320 --> 00:44:10,719
Speaker 1: But that doesn't make that make this blow any less painful.

1115
00:44:11,000 --> 00:44:14,960
Speaker 1: Your reaction and deflection with humor. I have used humor

1116
00:44:15,040 --> 00:44:18,080
Speaker 1: my entire life for difficult situations. When anybody used to

1117
00:44:18,080 --> 00:44:20,319
Speaker 1: say I'm sorry about your brother dying, I would be like, well,

1118
00:44:20,360 --> 00:44:22,120
Speaker 1: you didn't kill him, Like what did you do push

1119
00:44:22,200 --> 00:44:24,239
Speaker 1: him off a cliff? Like it is so uncomfortable?

1120
00:44:24,280 --> 00:44:26,040
Speaker 3: But was that hard because you didn't take it? You

1121
00:44:26,040 --> 00:44:27,719
Speaker 3: would try and then when you were lone it did

1122
00:44:27,719 --> 00:44:28,080
Speaker 3: it hit you?

1123
00:44:28,239 --> 00:44:29,839
Speaker 1: Or well, it hit me many years later. I had

1124
00:44:29,920 --> 00:44:31,920
Speaker 1: kind of delayed grief because I wasn't allowed to grieve

1125
00:44:31,920 --> 00:44:33,959
Speaker 1: in my in my mind at that time, I didn't

1126
00:44:33,960 --> 00:44:36,319
Speaker 1: want to let myself grieve because everyone around me was

1127
00:44:36,320 --> 00:44:38,480
Speaker 1: grieving and I didn't like the looks of that. So

1128
00:44:38,719 --> 00:44:40,920
Speaker 1: it hit me a lot later in life, like what

1129
00:44:41,000 --> 00:44:43,000
Speaker 1: I lost in the impact that that had on me.

1130
00:44:43,360 --> 00:44:46,200
Speaker 1: But I think, listen, you have so much experience in

1131
00:44:46,239 --> 00:44:49,160
Speaker 1: this that you need to take this like new chapter

1132
00:44:49,239 --> 00:44:52,080
Speaker 1: of your life. You're thirty, this is the first time

1133
00:44:52,120 --> 00:44:54,960
Speaker 1: you're going into life without your mother. This can be

1134
00:44:55,000 --> 00:44:58,560
Speaker 1: a new experience for your grief, and you can easily

1135
00:44:58,640 --> 00:45:00,840
Speaker 1: explain in the most art, you know, eloquent way that

1136
00:45:00,880 --> 00:45:03,680
Speaker 1: you just did that you have been using humor to

1137
00:45:03,719 --> 00:45:06,080
Speaker 1: deflect to the friends that you need. And this is

1138
00:45:06,080 --> 00:45:07,680
Speaker 1: a time in my life where I need to be

1139
00:45:07,760 --> 00:45:10,120
Speaker 1: honest with you. I actually need to lean on you,

1140
00:45:10,520 --> 00:45:12,719
Speaker 1: I actually need help from you. Just because I've had

1141
00:45:12,719 --> 00:45:15,200
Speaker 1: a lot of tragedy doesn't mean that I've become anewer

1142
00:45:15,320 --> 00:45:17,799
Speaker 1: to it. You know, you can say all of these

1143
00:45:17,840 --> 00:45:20,120
Speaker 1: things to people that you trust and know that love you,

1144
00:45:20,239 --> 00:45:22,600
Speaker 1: and I guarantee you are going to get responses that

1145
00:45:22,640 --> 00:45:25,359
Speaker 1: are going to help you through this time. And you

1146
00:45:25,400 --> 00:45:27,839
Speaker 1: can also look at this new chapter in your life

1147
00:45:27,880 --> 00:45:30,200
Speaker 1: as the period of time where you're not going to

1148
00:45:30,320 --> 00:45:33,720
Speaker 1: deflect your pain anymore. You're not going to use humor

1149
00:45:33,880 --> 00:45:36,800
Speaker 1: every chance you get. And to know, the way that

1150
00:45:36,880 --> 00:45:39,839
Speaker 1: John just retold the story of Bob, it does make

1151
00:45:39,880 --> 00:45:43,200
Speaker 1: people uncomfortable and it makes them unable to understand how

1152
00:45:43,200 --> 00:45:45,800
Speaker 1: to communicate with you or how to help you grieve

1153
00:45:45,840 --> 00:45:48,959
Speaker 1: when you're constantly making jokes. So it's not even really

1154
00:45:48,960 --> 00:45:51,799
Speaker 1: benefiting you in any way anymore. So you know how

1155
00:45:51,880 --> 00:45:55,000
Speaker 1: Oprah always says, things work until they don't. Like humor

1156
00:45:55,040 --> 00:45:56,760
Speaker 1: has worked for you now and now it doesn't.

1157
00:45:57,040 --> 00:45:58,960
Speaker 5: Yeah, And I hadn't even thought about it from their

1158
00:45:59,000 --> 00:46:02,520
Speaker 5: perspective that like, if they are really trying to connect,

1159
00:46:02,520 --> 00:46:04,759
Speaker 5: because they'll I have wonderful friends and they'll ask me,

1160
00:46:05,239 --> 00:46:08,719
Speaker 5: you know, how things are going, or they'll try to

1161
00:46:08,719 --> 00:46:11,200
Speaker 5: bring up both of my parents. And I hadn't even

1162
00:46:11,320 --> 00:46:14,040
Speaker 5: considered that, you know, that's selfish of me, that you know,

1163
00:46:14,080 --> 00:46:16,959
Speaker 5: they might have been genuine in that. I guess I

1164
00:46:16,960 --> 00:46:19,719
Speaker 5: had just always assumed, you know, that they were just

1165
00:46:19,760 --> 00:46:21,799
Speaker 5: trying to be nice, or that they just wanted to

1166
00:46:21,840 --> 00:46:24,839
Speaker 5: acknowledge the giant elephant in the room, that is, you.

1167
00:46:24,800 --> 00:46:28,040
Speaker 3: Know, you're denying their friendship to you. They want to help,

1168
00:46:28,040 --> 00:46:29,839
Speaker 3: They want to pour their heart out, and when you

1169
00:46:29,880 --> 00:46:32,960
Speaker 3: put this wallup of jokes and things, then they go, oh, man,

1170
00:46:33,000 --> 00:46:35,239
Speaker 3: that felt bad because they didn't get to help you.

1171
00:46:35,719 --> 00:46:35,839
Speaker 6: Right.

1172
00:46:36,280 --> 00:46:38,919
Speaker 5: Yeah, I appreciate that I hadn't thought of it that way.

1173
00:46:38,960 --> 00:46:41,680
Speaker 5: And I would be frustrated if somebody did that to me.

1174
00:46:41,719 --> 00:46:43,440
Speaker 5: And I'm you know, am the friend that would sit

1175
00:46:43,440 --> 00:46:46,480
Speaker 5: down and you know, grab their shoulders and say, you know,

1176
00:46:46,680 --> 00:46:47,840
Speaker 5: I'm here, talk to me.

1177
00:46:48,680 --> 00:46:50,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, And sometimes all you just need is you like

1178
00:46:51,120 --> 00:46:53,520
Speaker 1: as soon as you break that damn and just let

1179
00:46:53,560 --> 00:46:56,719
Speaker 1: them know that you're aware of this cover that you've

1180
00:46:56,760 --> 00:46:59,320
Speaker 1: been using. All you need is a good cry, and

1181
00:46:59,360 --> 00:47:02,200
Speaker 1: your friends show it's not even that we need so much,

1182
00:47:02,239 --> 00:47:04,720
Speaker 1: it's that you've put up this kind of wall around

1183
00:47:04,760 --> 00:47:07,319
Speaker 1: yourself and you just need to like let that wall

1184
00:47:07,320 --> 00:47:08,200
Speaker 1: crumble down.

1185
00:47:08,600 --> 00:47:10,319
Speaker 3: Did you get to spend great time with her at

1186
00:47:10,360 --> 00:47:12,800
Speaker 3: the end there, and were you guys close and oh yeah.

1187
00:47:12,640 --> 00:47:15,320
Speaker 5: I was her primary caregiver for about six years.

1188
00:47:15,360 --> 00:47:16,040
Speaker 1: Oh wow.

1189
00:47:16,080 --> 00:47:18,239
Speaker 3: She must have been so proud of you and the

1190
00:47:18,280 --> 00:47:20,120
Speaker 3: way you took care of her. That means so much

1191
00:47:20,200 --> 00:47:23,160
Speaker 3: to a parent, you know. And she died knowing that

1192
00:47:23,160 --> 00:47:25,719
Speaker 3: that you are the great daughter and you took care

1193
00:47:25,760 --> 00:47:28,440
Speaker 3: of her and you put other your needs aside for

1194
00:47:28,520 --> 00:47:31,720
Speaker 3: hers at least you have. That's that's really sweet, right.

1195
00:47:32,280 --> 00:47:35,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's very valuable. Six years. I mean, oh my god,

1196
00:47:35,680 --> 00:47:38,000
Speaker 1: I felt that a lot of people, or that every

1197
00:47:38,080 --> 00:47:40,800
Speaker 1: person would do something like that, give of themselves in

1198
00:47:40,840 --> 00:47:43,479
Speaker 1: that way. So you can also take comfort in knowing

1199
00:47:43,520 --> 00:47:45,319
Speaker 1: that you know, you were such a support system to

1200
00:47:45,360 --> 00:47:48,239
Speaker 1: your mother. But I think more importantly moving forward, you

1201
00:47:48,239 --> 00:47:50,759
Speaker 1: want to create this kind of new way of life,

1202
00:47:51,120 --> 00:47:54,040
Speaker 1: right like you're thirty. Now you're a grown up. You

1203
00:47:54,080 --> 00:47:56,840
Speaker 1: don't have to deflect anymore. You're allowed to be in pain,

1204
00:47:57,280 --> 00:47:59,360
Speaker 1: and the minute you let a little out, it's like

1205
00:47:59,440 --> 00:48:02,200
Speaker 1: you're blowing up entire gasket. You don't have to look

1206
00:48:02,200 --> 00:48:03,719
Speaker 1: at this as like, oh, you're going to be crying

1207
00:48:03,760 --> 00:48:06,359
Speaker 1: on your friend's shoulder every single day, Like it's not

1208
00:48:06,480 --> 00:48:08,279
Speaker 1: like that. You know how grief is. It comes in

1209
00:48:08,360 --> 00:48:12,160
Speaker 1: spurts and it's not constant. And the minute you get

1210
00:48:12,160 --> 00:48:14,480
Speaker 1: those walls down, you're just gonna feel so much more

1211
00:48:14,520 --> 00:48:17,560
Speaker 1: support coming at you and so much loving energy coming

1212
00:48:17,560 --> 00:48:19,959
Speaker 1: towards you that you've been kind of holding at bay.

1213
00:48:20,320 --> 00:48:23,520
Speaker 4: I would encourage you next time that you're feeling down

1214
00:48:23,719 --> 00:48:26,719
Speaker 4: or you're feeling really emotional, send a text to a

1215
00:48:26,760 --> 00:48:30,800
Speaker 4: friend and say to them, you know what I'm really

1216
00:48:30,840 --> 00:48:32,920
Speaker 4: going through it right now? Would you be able to

1217
00:48:32,960 --> 00:48:37,520
Speaker 4: come over and talk with me or be with me tonight, tomorrow, whenever.

1218
00:48:38,640 --> 00:48:39,720
Speaker 2: Let that be sort of your.

1219
00:48:39,760 --> 00:48:43,880
Speaker 4: Entree into opening up to a friend that way. You know,

1220
00:48:43,960 --> 00:48:46,720
Speaker 4: you know and they know this isn't like funny, funny

1221
00:48:46,719 --> 00:48:49,440
Speaker 4: fun times. This is I'm really dealing with it and

1222
00:48:49,480 --> 00:48:51,440
Speaker 4: I really need somebody to like, come be with me

1223
00:48:51,480 --> 00:48:54,480
Speaker 4: while I process this grief tonight and your friends are

1224
00:48:54,520 --> 00:48:55,200
Speaker 4: going to be thrilled.

1225
00:48:55,480 --> 00:48:56,879
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, I hope.

1226
00:48:56,920 --> 00:48:58,960
Speaker 5: So I kind of you know, I had written in

1227
00:48:59,000 --> 00:49:01,440
Speaker 5: because I was just of saving it for therapy. And

1228
00:49:01,480 --> 00:49:03,160
Speaker 5: you know, I have a great therapist and I have

1229
00:49:03,160 --> 00:49:05,520
Speaker 5: a great psychiatrist that helps me with my meds, and

1230
00:49:05,640 --> 00:49:08,279
Speaker 5: I trust both of them and I'm really thankful for that.

1231
00:49:08,520 --> 00:49:11,400
Speaker 5: But I know that that's not healthy to just you know,

1232
00:49:11,480 --> 00:49:13,560
Speaker 5: keep it between myself and the person that I'm paying.

1233
00:49:13,840 --> 00:49:15,640
Speaker 3: That's free. We're free.

1234
00:49:15,880 --> 00:49:17,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, And friendship is free.

1235
00:49:18,000 --> 00:49:20,279
Speaker 3: Friendship is free. I bet you've helped so many of

1236
00:49:20,320 --> 00:49:22,920
Speaker 3: your friends right in the past, You've been that, You've

1237
00:49:22,920 --> 00:49:25,200
Speaker 3: been that person to them, Let them be that to you.

1238
00:49:25,520 --> 00:49:28,760
Speaker 5: Yeah. We have a dead parents club group text.

1239
00:49:28,920 --> 00:49:30,719
Speaker 1: Oh I love that.

1240
00:49:32,200 --> 00:49:35,120
Speaker 5: From like different friend groups that have lost parents or

1241
00:49:35,160 --> 00:49:38,600
Speaker 5: siblings in some cases. So yeah, I've brought a few

1242
00:49:38,600 --> 00:49:40,680
Speaker 5: people together in that way. But it just struggled when

1243
00:49:40,680 --> 00:49:43,200
Speaker 5: it comes to myself and not deflecting.

1244
00:49:43,920 --> 00:49:46,200
Speaker 3: What's one of the great things that your mom bestowed

1245
00:49:46,200 --> 00:49:46,520
Speaker 3: on you?

1246
00:49:47,120 --> 00:49:50,280
Speaker 5: Oh gosh, everything. I know that that's a cliche answer,

1247
00:49:50,360 --> 00:49:53,920
Speaker 5: but she was just spicy and sassy and never apologized

1248
00:49:54,000 --> 00:49:59,200
Speaker 5: for being herself. She was super materialistic and like, not

1249
00:49:59,360 --> 00:50:01,879
Speaker 5: in a annoying way, but in like, yeah, I'm gonna

1250
00:50:01,920 --> 00:50:05,040
Speaker 5: buy nice things I like and deserve nice things. I mean,

1251
00:50:05,080 --> 00:50:07,120
Speaker 5: like she demanded that she'd be buried with a full

1252
00:50:07,160 --> 00:50:11,760
Speaker 5: manicure and jewelry on and I pick up your outfit

1253
00:50:12,280 --> 00:50:12,959
Speaker 5: for her to wear.

1254
00:50:13,080 --> 00:50:15,520
Speaker 3: And that's that's beautiful, just even to talk about her,

1255
00:50:15,520 --> 00:50:17,239
Speaker 3: because did just that movie Coco. Have you ever seen

1256
00:50:17,239 --> 00:50:18,399
Speaker 3: that movie Coco? It's a Disney movie.

1257
00:50:18,480 --> 00:50:21,240
Speaker 1: I'm sorry talking about it. You and me, No, Vanessa

1258
00:50:21,239 --> 00:50:21,640
Speaker 1: and me.

1259
00:50:22,239 --> 00:50:25,080
Speaker 3: She it was you know, when the somebody dies, they

1260
00:50:25,520 --> 00:50:26,880
Speaker 3: go up to a certain part of have and then

1261
00:50:26,960 --> 00:50:28,640
Speaker 3: if you don't keep their name alive, you don't talk

1262
00:50:28,640 --> 00:50:30,440
Speaker 3: about them all the good things they did, like you

1263
00:50:30,560 --> 00:50:32,560
Speaker 3: just talked about in the Wonder the qualities of your mother.

1264
00:50:32,680 --> 00:50:34,319
Speaker 3: Then they die again up there. So it's important to

1265
00:50:34,400 --> 00:50:36,800
Speaker 3: talk tell stories about her, laugh about her and make jokes,

1266
00:50:36,920 --> 00:50:39,360
Speaker 3: put pictures of her everywhere, and call into podcasts and

1267
00:50:39,400 --> 00:50:40,160
Speaker 3: talk about her if you can.

1268
00:50:40,920 --> 00:50:44,840
Speaker 1: Okay up, yeah, wrap that up, honey, Okay, keep us

1269
00:50:45,000 --> 00:50:47,719
Speaker 1: You're You're gonna be fine, okay. And this is I

1270
00:50:47,760 --> 00:50:49,319
Speaker 1: just want you to when you get off this like

1271
00:50:49,360 --> 00:50:51,360
Speaker 1: you're thirty. Now you're going into a new part of

1272
00:50:51,400 --> 00:50:54,360
Speaker 1: your life. Those old things are going to become something

1273
00:50:54,360 --> 00:50:56,440
Speaker 1: of the past, and now you're going to enter adulthood

1274
00:50:56,440 --> 00:50:58,680
Speaker 1: and womanhood and you're going to be the woman that

1275
00:50:58,719 --> 00:51:01,239
Speaker 1: your mother knew that you were and that you know

1276
00:51:01,320 --> 00:51:02,719
Speaker 1: you are. I appreciate that.

1277
00:51:02,800 --> 00:51:03,160
Speaker 5: Thank you.

1278
00:51:03,560 --> 00:51:07,279
Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, love you, love you, thank you, thank you.

1279
00:51:11,920 --> 00:51:14,440
Speaker 3: I am woman. Can you be my friend? Because I

1280
00:51:14,560 --> 00:51:16,719
Speaker 3: betually all the friends call you and go, hey, this

1281
00:51:16,760 --> 00:51:18,319
Speaker 3: and that you're really good at it. Now I know

1282
00:51:18,320 --> 00:51:19,000
Speaker 3: why you have this show.

1283
00:51:19,040 --> 00:51:19,920
Speaker 2: She's good at advice.

1284
00:51:20,320 --> 00:51:20,680
Speaker 1: Thank you.

1285
00:51:20,880 --> 00:51:23,319
Speaker 3: Thank you, guys, because you've lived so much asot it.

1286
00:51:23,360 --> 00:51:25,200
Speaker 1: I don't know. I like people and I'm interested in

1287
00:51:25,239 --> 00:51:27,320
Speaker 1: everyone's story, so I pick up a lot of information.

1288
00:51:27,440 --> 00:51:30,120
Speaker 1: I think maybe that's why. But sometimes I feel like

1289
00:51:30,120 --> 00:51:31,440
Speaker 1: I don't know what I'm talking about it, and sometimes I

1290
00:51:31,440 --> 00:51:34,279
Speaker 1: feel like I do. So that's just like everybody in life, right.

1291
00:51:34,320 --> 00:51:36,799
Speaker 1: Sometimes you think you're like crushing it, and sometimes you're

1292
00:51:36,800 --> 00:51:38,920
Speaker 1: like what the fuck am I doing to giving advice out?

1293
00:51:39,760 --> 00:51:41,840
Speaker 1: So you know, I just don't take myself too seriously,

1294
00:51:41,880 --> 00:51:43,680
Speaker 1: so it doesn't ever really become a problem.

1295
00:51:43,920 --> 00:51:45,480
Speaker 3: Or you're a good friend. I bet. Well, you talk

1296
00:51:45,520 --> 00:51:47,680
Speaker 3: about your friends luck, you take them on vacations.

1297
00:51:48,080 --> 00:51:52,120
Speaker 1: Yeah, well I like friends, John Stamos. Yes, the book

1298
00:51:52,200 --> 00:51:54,319
Speaker 1: is if you would have told me you guys can

1299
00:51:54,440 --> 00:51:56,480
Speaker 1: order it. You can go to your local bookstores, which

1300
00:51:56,520 --> 00:51:58,839
Speaker 1: I would say to support your local bookstores so that

1301
00:51:58,880 --> 00:52:02,120
Speaker 1: we have bookstores in fifty years. And I thank you

1302
00:52:02,160 --> 00:52:02,680
Speaker 1: for being here.

1303
00:52:02,800 --> 00:52:03,640
Speaker 3: My pleasure. I'm glad.

1304
00:52:03,680 --> 00:52:06,080
Speaker 1: It's a pleasure, John Stamos, always a pleasure.

1305
00:52:06,200 --> 00:52:08,759
Speaker 3: So it's not enough. We need to get together more

1306
00:52:08,760 --> 00:52:10,080
Speaker 3: often and talk and stuff.

1307
00:52:10,120 --> 00:52:11,719
Speaker 1: Well, we can just meet up at Disney World. I'm

1308
00:52:11,719 --> 00:52:14,319
Speaker 1: there usually two three times a week. I usually go

1309
00:52:14,360 --> 00:52:16,600
Speaker 1: from twelve to four Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays. I love

1310
00:52:16,640 --> 00:52:17,480
Speaker 1: to hit the La traffic.

1311
00:52:17,560 --> 00:52:19,920
Speaker 3: You're the one who Mickey Mouse out.

1312
00:52:20,120 --> 00:52:22,319
Speaker 1: No, no, no, that's not me. That's not me. But

1313
00:52:22,360 --> 00:52:24,520
Speaker 1: I do have a joke in my stand up about

1314
00:52:24,560 --> 00:52:26,680
Speaker 1: going to Disney World for the first time at seven,

1315
00:52:27,120 --> 00:52:29,960
Speaker 1: and even then I knew it was horseshit. Why because

1316
00:52:30,000 --> 00:52:32,280
Speaker 1: I just thought, what is this? This is a nightmare,

1317
00:52:32,360 --> 00:52:34,600
Speaker 1: this place, A bunch of grown mice running around trying

1318
00:52:34,600 --> 00:52:35,640
Speaker 1: to take photos with me.

1319
00:52:36,200 --> 00:52:39,720
Speaker 3: And people say she's bitter. Now you're not. You've changed,

1320
00:52:39,760 --> 00:52:43,479
Speaker 3: You've gotten soft, that's bitter. Yeah, except for that Disney rand.

1321
00:52:44,120 --> 00:52:46,160
Speaker 3: I'm a huge fan and I think you're smart and

1322
00:52:46,160 --> 00:52:48,719
Speaker 3: beautiful and great, and I'm glad to reconnect with you

1323
00:52:48,760 --> 00:52:51,040
Speaker 3: because i haven't seen you a few years. And Catherine's fantastic.

1324
00:52:51,440 --> 00:52:54,799
Speaker 3: She's like, you need her because I've heard you on

1325
00:52:54,840 --> 00:52:57,600
Speaker 3: your own And thanks for having me. I love you.

1326
00:52:57,719 --> 00:53:02,080
Speaker 1: Thank you, John about Shalloe. Okay, second shows have been

1327
00:53:02,120 --> 00:53:04,239
Speaker 1: added for those of you coming to see my new

1328
00:53:04,280 --> 00:53:06,200
Speaker 1: stand up tour, which you have to come because I'm

1329
00:53:06,200 --> 00:53:08,239
Speaker 1: having the best time. We added a second show in

1330
00:53:08,320 --> 00:53:12,200
Speaker 1: Cincinnati in the daytime at five o'clock PM. I'm doing

1331
00:53:12,280 --> 00:53:14,719
Speaker 1: my first show because I don't have a night where

1332
00:53:14,719 --> 00:53:16,319
Speaker 1: I can go back, so we added a second show

1333
00:53:16,320 --> 00:53:18,959
Speaker 1: at five pm, and the original show is at eight pm.

1334
00:53:19,040 --> 00:53:23,080
Speaker 1: Original show is sold out. Second show tickets are available Cincinnati.

1335
00:53:23,239 --> 00:53:27,040
Speaker 1: I'm also coming suit Chicago, the Chicago Theater, Portland, Oregon,

1336
00:53:27,080 --> 00:53:30,799
Speaker 1: San Francisco. They're both almost completely sold out. And you

1337
00:53:30,800 --> 00:53:33,160
Speaker 1: can go to Chelsea Hamler dot com for other tickets

1338
00:53:33,200 --> 00:53:35,400
Speaker 1: and other information and if you want to buy some

1339
00:53:35,480 --> 00:53:38,759
Speaker 1: of our merch that's all available on Chelseahandler dot com.

1340
00:53:38,880 --> 00:53:42,520
Speaker 1: And yeah, guys, I'll see you on the road.

1341
00:53:43,480 --> 00:53:45,880
Speaker 4: If you'd like advice from Chelsea, shoot us an email

1342
00:53:45,920 --> 00:53:48,960
Speaker 4: at Dear Chelsea podcast at gmail dot com and be

1343
00:53:49,000 --> 00:53:52,040
Speaker 4: sure to include your phone number. Dear Chelsea is edited

1344
00:53:52,040 --> 00:53:55,680
Speaker 4: and engineered by Brad Dickert executive producer Catherine Law and

1345
00:53:55,760 --> 00:53:58,200
Speaker 4: be sure to check out our merch at Chelseahandler dot

1346
00:53:58,200 --> 00:53:59,040
Speaker 4: com