1 00:00:03,200 --> 00:00:06,160 Speaker 1: Welcome to Stuff Mom Never Told You from House top 2 00:00:06,240 --> 00:00:14,120 Speaker 1: Works dot com. Hello, and welcome to the podcast. I'm 3 00:00:14,200 --> 00:00:17,680 Speaker 1: Kristen and I'm Caroline, and today we are talking about 4 00:00:17,720 --> 00:00:23,159 Speaker 1: a new baby celebration tradition. Can we already call it 5 00:00:23,200 --> 00:00:25,279 Speaker 1: a tradition? Hasn't been around long enough for it to 6 00:00:25,320 --> 00:00:28,560 Speaker 1: be a tradition? Came think in this age of the internet, 7 00:00:29,080 --> 00:00:31,560 Speaker 1: we can call it a tradition already. Yeah, we're gonna 8 00:00:31,600 --> 00:00:35,199 Speaker 1: talk about gender reveal parties. They're also known as gender 9 00:00:35,320 --> 00:00:39,239 Speaker 1: cake parties. And this is a little bit different than 10 00:00:39,280 --> 00:00:42,360 Speaker 1: a typical stuff I've Never told you topic because it's 11 00:00:42,360 --> 00:00:44,760 Speaker 1: something that hasn't been around that often. It's it's a 12 00:00:44,840 --> 00:00:50,800 Speaker 1: pretty niche type of thing to discuss. But since we're 13 00:00:50,840 --> 00:00:55,720 Speaker 1: talking about gender babies, parenting, it's a lot of cake 14 00:00:56,200 --> 00:00:59,600 Speaker 1: dessert when you talk about cake all the time. Yeah, 15 00:00:59,600 --> 00:01:02,440 Speaker 1: it's just actually an intersection of a lot of different 16 00:01:02,640 --> 00:01:05,399 Speaker 1: common stuff Mom Never told you themes and I have 17 00:01:05,480 --> 00:01:09,240 Speaker 1: a feeling that there are a lot of people listening 18 00:01:09,400 --> 00:01:13,960 Speaker 1: who are either planning gender revealed parties, have been to one, 19 00:01:14,800 --> 00:01:18,360 Speaker 1: or maybe hoping that they don't have to go to one. 20 00:01:19,480 --> 00:01:22,880 Speaker 1: Uh So, why don't we talk about what these things are. Yeah, 21 00:01:22,920 --> 00:01:24,800 Speaker 1: I want to start off by saying what they are not, 22 00:01:25,200 --> 00:01:29,000 Speaker 1: because when Kristen suggested this topic, I was like, oh, okay, 23 00:01:29,040 --> 00:01:31,200 Speaker 1: that's kind of neat, Like that's not something I've heard of. 24 00:01:32,120 --> 00:01:38,160 Speaker 1: Thinking that a gender reveal party was when a transgender 25 00:01:38,240 --> 00:01:45,080 Speaker 1: man or woman announced or debuted their new sex. I 26 00:01:44,840 --> 00:01:48,800 Speaker 1: I didn't. I literally never heard of this. I was like, okay, 27 00:01:48,960 --> 00:01:51,520 Speaker 1: so a party once you've had like a sex change 28 00:01:51,640 --> 00:01:54,880 Speaker 1: or you've decided to live as a man or so, 29 00:01:55,040 --> 00:01:58,480 Speaker 1: okay that that also could make total sense. Yeah, but 30 00:01:58,520 --> 00:02:00,840 Speaker 1: that is not at all what we're talking about. Well, 31 00:02:00,840 --> 00:02:03,440 Speaker 1: speaking though, of gender and sex. In a lot of ways, 32 00:02:03,560 --> 00:02:07,080 Speaker 1: gender reveal parties are a misnomer because the whole point 33 00:02:07,120 --> 00:02:11,720 Speaker 1: of it is to reveal the biological sex of the baby. 34 00:02:12,120 --> 00:02:17,359 Speaker 1: So linguistic quibble aside, they're called gender reveal parties, and yeah, 35 00:02:17,440 --> 00:02:21,160 Speaker 1: it's when you find out what the baby is going 36 00:02:21,320 --> 00:02:27,440 Speaker 1: to be according to chromosomal data, right, put that on 37 00:02:27,480 --> 00:02:30,880 Speaker 1: the cake. Yes, yes, And it's it's funny how how 38 00:02:31,360 --> 00:02:33,960 Speaker 1: big they've gotten so fast. And it really is not 39 00:02:34,000 --> 00:02:36,800 Speaker 1: to sound like I'm ninety years old, but thanks to 40 00:02:36,960 --> 00:02:41,840 Speaker 1: the Internet, these things have blown up websites like Pinterest 41 00:02:41,960 --> 00:02:47,520 Speaker 1: have fostered this this like kind of pseudo industry as 42 00:02:47,520 --> 00:02:52,320 Speaker 1: far as cakes go, as far as you know, ideas 43 00:02:52,360 --> 00:02:55,080 Speaker 1: for parties. Here, fill this box with balloons that are 44 00:02:55,120 --> 00:03:00,480 Speaker 1: either blue or pink and then release them. Things like that. Yeah. Yeah, 45 00:03:00,639 --> 00:03:03,640 Speaker 1: according to a couple of articles that we found reporting 46 00:03:03,639 --> 00:03:05,480 Speaker 1: on this in two thousand twelve, because it seems like 47 00:03:06,760 --> 00:03:11,920 Speaker 1: was really when gender revealed parties came into the mainstream, 48 00:03:11,960 --> 00:03:14,960 Speaker 1: because there were trend pieces in Time Magazine, in the 49 00:03:14,960 --> 00:03:18,160 Speaker 1: New York Times, in the New Yorker, and they reported, 50 00:03:18,200 --> 00:03:22,600 Speaker 1: for instance, um that over at baby center dot com, 51 00:03:22,760 --> 00:03:26,160 Speaker 1: which is, as you can imagine, a very popular website 52 00:03:26,280 --> 00:03:31,000 Speaker 1: for a new parents that by April twelve, the number 53 00:03:31,120 --> 00:03:35,480 Speaker 1: of threads discussion threads about gender revealed parties had gone 54 00:03:35,560 --> 00:03:38,640 Speaker 1: up to two eighty two from just twenty eight the 55 00:03:38,720 --> 00:03:42,040 Speaker 1: year before. Yeah, a lot of people are talking about it. 56 00:03:42,240 --> 00:03:44,760 Speaker 1: And then if you go over to YouTube, so you know, 57 00:03:44,960 --> 00:03:48,720 Speaker 1: just in our society in general right now, everybody's youtubing 58 00:03:48,800 --> 00:03:52,000 Speaker 1: everything or instagramming or whatever. And so if you look 59 00:03:52,040 --> 00:03:56,600 Speaker 1: for gender reveal videos on YouTube, the first one dates 60 00:03:56,600 --> 00:03:59,840 Speaker 1: back to all the way to two thousand eight, and 61 00:04:00,000 --> 00:04:03,480 Speaker 1: it simply shows the parents opening a sealed envelope containing 62 00:04:03,480 --> 00:04:06,760 Speaker 1: the ultrasound results before friends and family. There were a 63 00:04:06,840 --> 00:04:09,040 Speaker 1: couple more that trickled in in two thousand nine, and 64 00:04:10,480 --> 00:04:14,360 Speaker 1: but in the six months preceding April, more than eight 65 00:04:14,560 --> 00:04:18,360 Speaker 1: hundred gender revealed videos were uploaded to YouTube, and this morning, 66 00:04:18,600 --> 00:04:23,159 Speaker 1: before we walked into the podcast studio, there were fifty 67 00:04:23,240 --> 00:04:27,880 Speaker 1: three thousand, three hundred results for just gender revealed party. 68 00:04:28,120 --> 00:04:31,200 Speaker 1: I mean, look at that. This was April, there were 69 00:04:31,240 --> 00:04:35,920 Speaker 1: eighteen hundred. Yeah, yeah, But I think that it has 70 00:04:36,000 --> 00:04:39,560 Speaker 1: everything to do though, with the Internet and with social media, 71 00:04:39,760 --> 00:04:44,160 Speaker 1: and in terms of a specific origin for gender revealed parties. Clearly, 72 00:04:44,320 --> 00:04:48,839 Speaker 1: as that two thousand eight YouTube video indicates, there have 73 00:04:48,880 --> 00:04:51,920 Speaker 1: been families that have been having these little celebrations here 74 00:04:51,920 --> 00:04:56,000 Speaker 1: and there. But I think that the origin really has, 75 00:04:56,320 --> 00:04:59,239 Speaker 1: you know, traces back to people seeing other people doing 76 00:04:59,279 --> 00:05:02,599 Speaker 1: this on YouTube, or reading threads about it on a 77 00:05:02,640 --> 00:05:04,919 Speaker 1: place like baby center dot com, seeing ideas about it 78 00:05:04,960 --> 00:05:08,800 Speaker 1: on Pinterest. It seems all fueled by the Internet, so 79 00:05:08,880 --> 00:05:11,480 Speaker 1: much so that it seemed to have started out as 80 00:05:11,520 --> 00:05:14,240 Speaker 1: a very American centric kind of thing to do, in 81 00:05:14,279 --> 00:05:17,400 Speaker 1: the same way that baby showers are sort of American 82 00:05:17,480 --> 00:05:21,120 Speaker 1: and they have now jumped over the pond. We we 83 00:05:21,160 --> 00:05:24,960 Speaker 1: read a column by a very disgruntled woman in the 84 00:05:25,000 --> 00:05:29,640 Speaker 1: Telegraph saying, well, thanks Americans, because not only did you 85 00:05:29,640 --> 00:05:33,000 Speaker 1: give us baby showers, now we have these gender reveal parties. 86 00:05:33,440 --> 00:05:36,000 Speaker 1: And you know, I mean there was a lot there 87 00:05:36,040 --> 00:05:39,120 Speaker 1: was a lot of negativity about these parties online and 88 00:05:39,400 --> 00:05:42,520 Speaker 1: I was telling Kristen this, you know, I when I 89 00:05:42,560 --> 00:05:45,440 Speaker 1: started reading about this, because I was so wrong about 90 00:05:45,440 --> 00:05:47,359 Speaker 1: what they were, and so when I started reading about them, 91 00:05:47,400 --> 00:05:49,560 Speaker 1: I was like, oh, that's kind of stupid. But then again, 92 00:05:49,600 --> 00:05:51,640 Speaker 1: I think baby showers are kind of stupid. But as 93 00:05:51,680 --> 00:05:54,880 Speaker 1: I read more, I was like, who cares. Let these 94 00:05:54,920 --> 00:05:58,280 Speaker 1: parents or families celebrate however they want to celebrate, right, 95 00:05:58,360 --> 00:06:02,599 Speaker 1: And I'm sure that your perspective, our perspective on baby 96 00:06:02,600 --> 00:06:06,919 Speaker 1: showers and all of the announcements via social media of 97 00:06:06,920 --> 00:06:09,720 Speaker 1: the development of said baby inside our wombs and all 98 00:06:09,760 --> 00:06:12,479 Speaker 1: those different things, our perspective on it would probably change 99 00:06:12,520 --> 00:06:15,440 Speaker 1: if we walked a mile in that womb. Sure, yeah, 100 00:06:15,480 --> 00:06:17,920 Speaker 1: if if we're the ones having it. But also on 101 00:06:17,960 --> 00:06:20,479 Speaker 1: the other side of that coin, if we were the 102 00:06:20,480 --> 00:06:23,640 Speaker 1: ones being invited to all of them, right, right, But 103 00:06:23,760 --> 00:06:27,560 Speaker 1: first we have to give a rundown of what specifically 104 00:06:28,240 --> 00:06:34,600 Speaker 1: a gender reveal party entails, because it isn't just parents saying, oh, 105 00:06:34,680 --> 00:06:37,440 Speaker 1: it's gonna be X y Z. I don't know whether 106 00:06:37,440 --> 00:06:41,240 Speaker 1: there'd be three things, but you know, sure. Uh So. 107 00:06:41,279 --> 00:06:46,480 Speaker 1: What happens though, is that usually it's in the second 108 00:06:46,560 --> 00:06:50,240 Speaker 1: trimester that the mom to be will have the ultrasound 109 00:06:50,320 --> 00:06:53,480 Speaker 1: done to determine the sex, and around eight percent of 110 00:06:53,520 --> 00:06:56,640 Speaker 1: parents choose to see what the sex is going to 111 00:06:56,720 --> 00:06:59,000 Speaker 1: be beforehand, because hey, that makes sense, you know, we 112 00:06:59,040 --> 00:07:01,760 Speaker 1: can start thinking about that thing inside of you as 113 00:07:01,800 --> 00:07:04,960 Speaker 1: a person with an identity. And then parents who want 114 00:07:04,960 --> 00:07:08,479 Speaker 1: to have a gender revealed party instruct the ultrasound technician 115 00:07:08,800 --> 00:07:12,520 Speaker 1: to not tell them what is inside that womb, but 116 00:07:12,640 --> 00:07:17,920 Speaker 1: rather seal up Oscar's style. The results in an envelope, 117 00:07:17,920 --> 00:07:22,240 Speaker 1: which the ultrasound tech then hands off too said mother 118 00:07:22,320 --> 00:07:25,080 Speaker 1: or father whomever to be, And then they go to 119 00:07:25,160 --> 00:07:28,280 Speaker 1: a bakery and then they hand the envelope to the 120 00:07:28,320 --> 00:07:32,160 Speaker 1: baker and they say, baker, inside this envelope, you will 121 00:07:32,200 --> 00:07:37,360 Speaker 1: find the sex of our baby, maybe plural babies. Please 122 00:07:37,440 --> 00:07:42,480 Speaker 1: make a cake of either pink or blue coloring, cover 123 00:07:42,600 --> 00:07:45,400 Speaker 1: it with a frosting that won't give away with inside 124 00:07:45,440 --> 00:07:48,760 Speaker 1: of it and put question marks all over it maybe 125 00:07:48,840 --> 00:07:51,360 Speaker 1: if you want to do that style, or in some 126 00:07:51,400 --> 00:07:55,160 Speaker 1: cases a really creepy fondante baby. Yeah, they're also fond 127 00:07:55,200 --> 00:07:58,320 Speaker 1: of babies. And so then at the party, in what 128 00:07:58,600 --> 00:08:02,720 Speaker 1: is kind of a brew little fashion, cut into a 129 00:08:02,720 --> 00:08:06,520 Speaker 1: cake to see what color it reveals, or if you 130 00:08:06,520 --> 00:08:09,000 Speaker 1: don't have a full cake, some people choose to do 131 00:08:09,080 --> 00:08:14,440 Speaker 1: cupcakes filled with pink or blue cream filling of some sort. 132 00:08:14,560 --> 00:08:18,000 Speaker 1: So you have a room full of adults biting into 133 00:08:18,760 --> 00:08:21,960 Speaker 1: a cupcake. It's kind of hilarious. What do you think 134 00:08:21,960 --> 00:08:26,360 Speaker 1: about it? Because you're like, oh, baby, let me take 135 00:08:26,400 --> 00:08:29,520 Speaker 1: this giant knife. You know, I don't know if this 136 00:08:29,600 --> 00:08:32,240 Speaker 1: had happened. A friend of mine um has just had 137 00:08:32,240 --> 00:08:34,960 Speaker 1: her second baby. They're both boys. She was devastated both 138 00:08:35,000 --> 00:08:37,880 Speaker 1: times when to find out they were boys instead of girls. 139 00:08:38,360 --> 00:08:40,480 Speaker 1: And I'm really glad she didn't decide to have a 140 00:08:40,480 --> 00:08:42,920 Speaker 1: gender reveal party because I feel like if you had 141 00:08:42,960 --> 00:08:48,760 Speaker 1: given her a big knife and told her to cut 142 00:08:48,800 --> 00:08:50,760 Speaker 1: into a cake to to find out that her baby 143 00:08:50,800 --> 00:08:52,760 Speaker 1: was going to be a boy, or the second time 144 00:08:52,800 --> 00:08:55,680 Speaker 1: around a second boy, she might have stabbed somebody like 145 00:08:55,679 --> 00:09:00,280 Speaker 1: probably your husband or something. But people would also say 146 00:09:00,320 --> 00:09:07,439 Speaker 1: that having a celebration for this moment could be away 147 00:09:07,679 --> 00:09:14,440 Speaker 1: to ease those possibly dashed expectations or hopes for having 148 00:09:14,920 --> 00:09:17,000 Speaker 1: one or the other. Well, what I think is weird? 149 00:09:17,080 --> 00:09:20,520 Speaker 1: So okay, it's not weird enough just to cut into 150 00:09:20,600 --> 00:09:24,520 Speaker 1: something you know and determine the sex of the baby, 151 00:09:24,600 --> 00:09:27,440 Speaker 1: or or bite into something that's cream filled to determine 152 00:09:27,440 --> 00:09:29,920 Speaker 1: the sex of a baby. But like a lot of 153 00:09:29,920 --> 00:09:33,440 Speaker 1: times these parties, people will vote for one way or 154 00:09:33,480 --> 00:09:36,400 Speaker 1: the other, and that's weird. What that's awkward When you're 155 00:09:36,440 --> 00:09:39,040 Speaker 1: like wearing the pink shirt, it's like whoops. Yeah, a 156 00:09:39,080 --> 00:09:41,400 Speaker 1: lot of times they'll do it. Where will you when 157 00:09:41,440 --> 00:09:43,280 Speaker 1: you arrive at the party, if you're a guest, you're 158 00:09:43,320 --> 00:09:46,840 Speaker 1: either going to be on team girl or team boy, 159 00:09:47,000 --> 00:09:50,160 Speaker 1: or yeah, you might place a bet. There's all all 160 00:09:50,280 --> 00:09:55,000 Speaker 1: these things involved with splitting people into the pink or 161 00:09:55,280 --> 00:09:58,920 Speaker 1: the blue. And before we get into are we going 162 00:09:59,360 --> 00:10:02,240 Speaker 1: are j revealed? Parties like taking us way back in 163 00:10:02,400 --> 00:10:04,720 Speaker 1: time now to where like girls are in a pink 164 00:10:04,760 --> 00:10:07,600 Speaker 1: corner and boys are in a blue corner. Um First, 165 00:10:07,640 --> 00:10:11,679 Speaker 1: it's interesting, though, to see what some culture critics perceive 166 00:10:11,960 --> 00:10:16,080 Speaker 1: as the motivation for having. It's almost like a pre 167 00:10:16,200 --> 00:10:20,440 Speaker 1: baby shower, Like, why do we need another celebration on 168 00:10:20,520 --> 00:10:23,120 Speaker 1: top of a baby shower. Yeah, a lot of people 169 00:10:23,120 --> 00:10:25,960 Speaker 1: out there are saying that this is just proof that 170 00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:30,080 Speaker 1: we are, you know, narcissistic, that self involved. We just 171 00:10:30,120 --> 00:10:33,480 Speaker 1: want another excuse to celebrate ourselves. And a lot of 172 00:10:33,480 --> 00:10:36,520 Speaker 1: people are out there saying that the gender revealed party 173 00:10:36,679 --> 00:10:41,160 Speaker 1: is putting the focus on ourselves rather than the future 174 00:10:41,240 --> 00:10:44,040 Speaker 1: human that you're about to have, and that we're celebrating 175 00:10:45,400 --> 00:10:48,040 Speaker 1: I don't know almost that we're celebrating the wrong thing. 176 00:10:48,320 --> 00:10:51,559 Speaker 1: And the New York Times was particularly snarky. They wrote, 177 00:10:51,559 --> 00:10:54,600 Speaker 1: in a culture where many expected parents feel obligated to 178 00:10:54,600 --> 00:10:57,560 Speaker 1: tweet their pregnancy announcement, live post their ride to the 179 00:10:57,600 --> 00:11:00,920 Speaker 1: hospital via Instagram and skype, the babies first smile, it's 180 00:11:00,960 --> 00:11:04,760 Speaker 1: the latest example of one of parenthood's formerly private moments 181 00:11:04,800 --> 00:11:08,680 Speaker 1: becoming a matter of public consumption and also literal consumption 182 00:11:08,760 --> 00:11:14,959 Speaker 1: when you're eating the cupcake or delicious consumption exactly. Uh. 183 00:11:15,040 --> 00:11:18,640 Speaker 1: Linda Murray, who's editor in chief over baby center dot com, 184 00:11:18,800 --> 00:11:21,480 Speaker 1: thinks that it also has to do with that social 185 00:11:21,480 --> 00:11:26,959 Speaker 1: media aspect where you know, maybe expectant moms really want 186 00:11:27,000 --> 00:11:30,920 Speaker 1: to do this because it will provide some fun fodder 187 00:11:31,120 --> 00:11:35,760 Speaker 1: for their Facebook or Instagram accounts um or kind of 188 00:11:35,760 --> 00:11:40,520 Speaker 1: on a more dismal side to that, maybe we are 189 00:11:40,760 --> 00:11:45,400 Speaker 1: so involved, Murray speculates with our social media lives that 190 00:11:45,520 --> 00:11:50,160 Speaker 1: our real life, our offline life, is a little bit lacking, 191 00:11:50,760 --> 00:11:53,960 Speaker 1: and especially when you're going through something that can be 192 00:11:54,040 --> 00:11:58,160 Speaker 1: a bit difficult and taxing and exhausting, like pregnancy, that 193 00:11:58,320 --> 00:12:01,920 Speaker 1: this is a moment for us to actually have a 194 00:12:01,960 --> 00:12:04,480 Speaker 1: good time and and do something fun and actually get 195 00:12:04,520 --> 00:12:07,520 Speaker 1: together face to face with people where we normally don't 196 00:12:07,520 --> 00:12:09,600 Speaker 1: so much anymore. Yeah, and I mean the New York 197 00:12:09,600 --> 00:12:11,959 Speaker 1: Times does drop a snart long enough to say that, 198 00:12:12,000 --> 00:12:15,120 Speaker 1: you know, maybe this is just a modern way to 199 00:12:15,600 --> 00:12:19,080 Speaker 1: savor the surprise to not be stuck in a dark 200 00:12:19,440 --> 00:12:22,120 Speaker 1: ultrasound room at the doctor's office and they're like, oh, 201 00:12:22,160 --> 00:12:24,760 Speaker 1: it's a girl, and you're like, my legs are in stirrups. 202 00:12:25,160 --> 00:12:28,319 Speaker 1: You know, Instead, you're at home wearing your party dress, 203 00:12:28,360 --> 00:12:30,280 Speaker 1: surrounded by friends and family, and you get to do 204 00:12:30,360 --> 00:12:34,160 Speaker 1: something fun and you know, actually make it enjoyable. Well. 205 00:12:34,200 --> 00:12:40,080 Speaker 1: Invendors like bakers are certainly not disappointed by this trend 206 00:12:40,120 --> 00:12:44,559 Speaker 1: at all, because There are not only so many d 207 00:12:44,640 --> 00:12:48,559 Speaker 1: i y ideas for gender revealed parties over on Pinterest, 208 00:12:48,880 --> 00:12:51,880 Speaker 1: but there are also plenty of bakers who are now 209 00:12:51,960 --> 00:12:55,600 Speaker 1: specializing in things like this filling rush orders. You have 210 00:12:55,960 --> 00:13:01,720 Speaker 1: entire commercial websites popping up just to um fulfill the 211 00:13:01,840 --> 00:13:05,959 Speaker 1: kinds of decor needs you might want for a gender 212 00:13:05,960 --> 00:13:08,880 Speaker 1: reveal party. Yeah. And I mean even Etsy, you know, 213 00:13:08,920 --> 00:13:10,760 Speaker 1: we've talked about Etsy. Etsy is getting in on the 214 00:13:10,760 --> 00:13:13,640 Speaker 1: game too. There are plenty of sellers over there who 215 00:13:13,720 --> 00:13:17,080 Speaker 1: make all sorts of neat, artistic little items that you 216 00:13:17,120 --> 00:13:20,160 Speaker 1: can have and feature at your gender revealed party. I 217 00:13:20,160 --> 00:13:22,000 Speaker 1: gotta say, like, you know, Kristen and I went through 218 00:13:22,080 --> 00:13:29,280 Speaker 1: the Pinterest search for gender revealed party items and there's 219 00:13:29,280 --> 00:13:32,320 Speaker 1: a lot of cute stuff. I mean, people get really 220 00:13:32,360 --> 00:13:34,920 Speaker 1: creative with it. Yeah, I mean we were kind of 221 00:13:34,960 --> 00:13:37,240 Speaker 1: poking fun at or not kind of. We were were 222 00:13:37,240 --> 00:13:39,720 Speaker 1: poking fun at the whole cutting into the cake and 223 00:13:39,760 --> 00:13:43,760 Speaker 1: the cupcake, biting into cupcake thing. But there are also 224 00:13:43,840 --> 00:13:47,440 Speaker 1: ideas like opening up a box of balloons, he healing 225 00:13:47,520 --> 00:13:51,359 Speaker 1: balloons that will either have pink or blue, or shooting confetti, 226 00:13:52,000 --> 00:13:56,200 Speaker 1: or going to say baby bou cheek and handing off 227 00:13:56,200 --> 00:13:59,520 Speaker 1: the sonogram results or the ultrasung results. Excuse me to 228 00:14:00,080 --> 00:14:04,040 Speaker 1: a clerk and say, buy us a gender appropriate outfit 229 00:14:04,160 --> 00:14:07,040 Speaker 1: to go with this. And then you open up the 230 00:14:07,080 --> 00:14:13,040 Speaker 1: outfit and you're like, oh, look it's address. It comes 231 00:14:13,040 --> 00:14:18,040 Speaker 1: with baby lipstick. Well, you know, there are arguments against 232 00:14:18,240 --> 00:14:21,120 Speaker 1: these parties that go beyond just snarkiness in the New 233 00:14:21,200 --> 00:14:23,720 Speaker 1: York Times saying that people need to keep their private 234 00:14:23,720 --> 00:14:26,720 Speaker 1: lives private. And we will get more into that and 235 00:14:26,760 --> 00:14:30,000 Speaker 1: talk about other people's views of these gender revealed parties 236 00:14:30,120 --> 00:14:33,000 Speaker 1: right after a quick break and now back to the show. 237 00:14:33,760 --> 00:14:36,680 Speaker 1: So earlier in the show, we referenced a column over 238 00:14:36,880 --> 00:14:40,480 Speaker 1: at the Telegraph newspaper and that that was the one 239 00:14:40,480 --> 00:14:44,560 Speaker 1: written by the disgruntled brit who wasn't quite happy yet 240 00:14:44,600 --> 00:14:48,760 Speaker 1: another American export of a baby related party. But she 241 00:14:48,840 --> 00:14:51,240 Speaker 1: talked to Professor Cathy Warwick, who's the head of the 242 00:14:51,280 --> 00:14:55,920 Speaker 1: Royal College of Midwives, who notes that there is a 243 00:14:56,320 --> 00:15:00,320 Speaker 1: possible downside to having a gender revealed party be because 244 00:15:00,360 --> 00:15:05,360 Speaker 1: even though the chances for miscarriage drop dramatically once you're 245 00:15:05,400 --> 00:15:09,680 Speaker 1: into the second and their trimesters, something could still go wrong. 246 00:15:09,800 --> 00:15:13,560 Speaker 1: Warwick says that you know it could give women false hopes, 247 00:15:13,960 --> 00:15:18,240 Speaker 1: because even after that twelve week mark, there is still 248 00:15:18,280 --> 00:15:21,680 Speaker 1: the possibility for a miscarriage or something happening. Yeah, And 249 00:15:21,720 --> 00:15:24,400 Speaker 1: I mean some people could argue that, well, I might 250 00:15:24,480 --> 00:15:26,960 Speaker 1: have my baby shower and then something could could go wrong. 251 00:15:26,960 --> 00:15:30,160 Speaker 1: But I think the argument here is that these gender 252 00:15:30,200 --> 00:15:34,040 Speaker 1: revealed parties are by their very nature so public and 253 00:15:34,240 --> 00:15:36,840 Speaker 1: so social media driven, like I'm going to post it 254 00:15:36,880 --> 00:15:40,880 Speaker 1: on Twitter and Facebook and YouTube and Instagram and so well. 255 00:15:40,880 --> 00:15:43,080 Speaker 1: It's not to say you wouldn't post all that stuff 256 00:15:43,080 --> 00:15:45,520 Speaker 1: about your baby shower, but I think there's maybe a 257 00:15:45,880 --> 00:15:49,400 Speaker 1: different cultural attitude maybe about these gender reveal parties. And 258 00:15:49,480 --> 00:15:53,800 Speaker 1: some are also concerned at whether or not these parties 259 00:15:53,920 --> 00:15:58,400 Speaker 1: are inadvertently celebrating gender essential ism of girls or pink 260 00:15:58,560 --> 00:16:01,000 Speaker 1: and this this and the US and boys are blue 261 00:16:01,160 --> 00:16:04,320 Speaker 1: and their masculine their boys, and whether or not we're 262 00:16:04,400 --> 00:16:10,000 Speaker 1: sort of taking gender couple steps backward in the process. Yeah. 263 00:16:10,000 --> 00:16:14,200 Speaker 1: Somebody cited a study that had talked to moms who 264 00:16:14,240 --> 00:16:17,640 Speaker 1: had found out the sex of their baby ahead of 265 00:16:17,640 --> 00:16:21,920 Speaker 1: time while in utero and asked them kind of the 266 00:16:21,960 --> 00:16:24,840 Speaker 1: temperament of the baby and moms who knew they were 267 00:16:24,840 --> 00:16:27,360 Speaker 1: going to have a girl said that, you know, there 268 00:16:27,400 --> 00:16:29,760 Speaker 1: were soft movements and it was like she was doing 269 00:16:29,800 --> 00:16:32,920 Speaker 1: ballet in there, and it was rolling movements and very 270 00:16:32,960 --> 00:16:35,560 Speaker 1: peaceful and calm. Moms who knew they were having a 271 00:16:35,600 --> 00:16:37,960 Speaker 1: boy were much more likely to say, oh, it was 272 00:16:38,040 --> 00:16:40,520 Speaker 1: like he was doing karate in there and tumbling around 273 00:16:40,560 --> 00:16:42,480 Speaker 1: and punching up in the air and things like that, 274 00:16:42,800 --> 00:16:45,920 Speaker 1: whereas mothers who never found out the sex until birth 275 00:16:46,720 --> 00:16:50,560 Speaker 1: were more kind of evenly split on how they described 276 00:16:50,720 --> 00:16:53,640 Speaker 1: their babies movements in utero. And so there is a 277 00:16:53,680 --> 00:16:56,480 Speaker 1: lot of that discussion about, like, is this just another 278 00:16:56,600 --> 00:17:00,360 Speaker 1: thing we're already priming ourselves and our future chill aldren 279 00:17:00,400 --> 00:17:03,560 Speaker 1: to have to be a certain way exactly. That was 280 00:17:03,600 --> 00:17:07,520 Speaker 1: a debor Siegel writing over at the Society Pages, and 281 00:17:07,840 --> 00:17:12,359 Speaker 1: she was referencing that study on amnio synthesis and gender 282 00:17:12,400 --> 00:17:16,119 Speaker 1: stereotyping sort of lead up to her point about gender 283 00:17:16,119 --> 00:17:19,240 Speaker 1: revealed parties, which is that they left her with the 284 00:17:19,400 --> 00:17:23,840 Speaker 1: question of, quote, why all the what questions? Instead of who? 285 00:17:24,040 --> 00:17:27,400 Speaker 1: Why gender and not sex? Who's saying shouldn't we be 286 00:17:27,680 --> 00:17:31,280 Speaker 1: more celebratory and expectant of who this child is going 287 00:17:31,359 --> 00:17:33,560 Speaker 1: to be rather than what? So much it's going to 288 00:17:33,560 --> 00:17:35,560 Speaker 1: be Yeah. And it's funny that she brought this up, 289 00:17:35,600 --> 00:17:38,440 Speaker 1: because that is exactly what I was thinking reading all 290 00:17:38,440 --> 00:17:42,080 Speaker 1: of these articles about gender revealed parties, because first of all, 291 00:17:42,119 --> 00:17:44,240 Speaker 1: I was like, well, they I don't know if they 292 00:17:44,240 --> 00:17:46,480 Speaker 1: should go ahead and jump on the gender. It's more 293 00:17:46,600 --> 00:17:49,920 Speaker 1: the sex that they're finding out. But as I mean 294 00:17:50,160 --> 00:17:53,040 Speaker 1: many people commented under her piece, they were like, Okay, 295 00:17:53,680 --> 00:17:57,080 Speaker 1: a lot of people don't know to even differentiate between 296 00:17:57,160 --> 00:18:00,520 Speaker 1: sex and gender. They don't see that dividing line. And 297 00:18:00,520 --> 00:18:03,480 Speaker 1: then the whole what versus who? I was absolutely thinking that. 298 00:18:03,560 --> 00:18:06,639 Speaker 1: I'm like, no, you you want to put a food 299 00:18:06,720 --> 00:18:08,960 Speaker 1: to it, not a what I saw all these cakes with, 300 00:18:09,119 --> 00:18:14,040 Speaker 1: like what's it gonna be? You know, human? Probably going 301 00:18:14,080 --> 00:18:16,720 Speaker 1: to be a human child? Well, I mean, and that 302 00:18:16,840 --> 00:18:21,320 Speaker 1: also does relate back to your your first inclination of 303 00:18:21,320 --> 00:18:25,000 Speaker 1: a gender revealed party being a transgender person kind of 304 00:18:25,040 --> 00:18:28,880 Speaker 1: coming out and celebrating, you know, this identity that they're 305 00:18:28,880 --> 00:18:33,359 Speaker 1: now embodying day to day. And to that very point though, 306 00:18:33,600 --> 00:18:37,119 Speaker 1: that is a bit of a problem though with this 307 00:18:37,160 --> 00:18:39,840 Speaker 1: idea of like from the very get go, saying pink 308 00:18:39,920 --> 00:18:43,000 Speaker 1: or blue, you know, and that because that's that you know, 309 00:18:43,080 --> 00:18:46,359 Speaker 1: that's just looking at things through the gender binary rather 310 00:18:46,440 --> 00:18:51,320 Speaker 1: than the very well established spectrum that exists. Um. But 311 00:18:51,640 --> 00:18:55,360 Speaker 1: Laurie over at Feminist NG did have an interesting point 312 00:18:55,400 --> 00:18:57,240 Speaker 1: to all of this. She saw a silver lining which 313 00:18:57,240 --> 00:18:59,200 Speaker 1: I was surprised. As soon as I saw a link 314 00:18:59,240 --> 00:19:03,480 Speaker 1: to a gender reveal party article of Feminist NG, I 315 00:19:03,520 --> 00:19:06,160 Speaker 1: assumed that it was going to be two thumbs way 316 00:19:06,160 --> 00:19:10,919 Speaker 1: way down. But she said that, yeah, in theory, it 317 00:19:10,920 --> 00:19:14,480 Speaker 1: seems kind of silly and anti feminist, but she says 318 00:19:14,520 --> 00:19:19,880 Speaker 1: there's also a progressive message underlying those celebrations that no 319 00:19:19,920 --> 00:19:25,120 Speaker 1: matter the sex people are celebrating, they're just happy at 320 00:19:25,280 --> 00:19:29,840 Speaker 1: whatever it's going to be or whomever it's going to be. 321 00:19:29,880 --> 00:19:34,800 Speaker 1: In theory, yeah, yeah, so yeah, before before the sex 322 00:19:35,080 --> 00:19:37,679 Speaker 1: is even known, before the gender is determined, we are 323 00:19:37,720 --> 00:19:41,480 Speaker 1: excited to have this person show up and Donna Onesie 324 00:19:41,520 --> 00:19:44,320 Speaker 1: in our household. But I mean, if you scrolled out 325 00:19:44,359 --> 00:19:47,760 Speaker 1: unto the comments under that piece, pretty much nobody agreed 326 00:19:47,800 --> 00:19:51,160 Speaker 1: with her. Really. Yeah, well that's interesting because she made, 327 00:19:51,400 --> 00:19:53,720 Speaker 1: you know, a valid point of saying that, you know, 328 00:19:53,800 --> 00:19:57,720 Speaker 1: we're living in a time when girls are valued so 329 00:19:57,800 --> 00:20:01,040 Speaker 1: much less than boys, and that's not I mean, not 330 00:20:01,119 --> 00:20:03,439 Speaker 1: that that's necessarily a new thing or anything like that, 331 00:20:03,600 --> 00:20:06,240 Speaker 1: but just talking about how we have issues of sex 332 00:20:06,280 --> 00:20:09,520 Speaker 1: selective abortions on the rise in India. I mean even 333 00:20:09,520 --> 00:20:14,120 Speaker 1: in the United States, you have sex selection becoming a 334 00:20:14,200 --> 00:20:19,040 Speaker 1: multi multi million dollar business with parents who can afford 335 00:20:19,119 --> 00:20:22,600 Speaker 1: to pay for treatments going in from the get go 336 00:20:22,680 --> 00:20:24,360 Speaker 1: and saying listen, we want a boy or we want 337 00:20:24,359 --> 00:20:29,600 Speaker 1: a girl, which really could be an entire podcast unto itself. 338 00:20:29,640 --> 00:20:31,880 Speaker 1: And if you're listening and would like to hear an 339 00:20:31,880 --> 00:20:36,080 Speaker 1: episode on baby sex selection, let us know and I'll 340 00:20:36,080 --> 00:20:38,400 Speaker 1: do it. Yeah, I mean that, I mean side note, 341 00:20:38,400 --> 00:20:42,080 Speaker 1: I mean it's I think it's terrible and scary to 342 00:20:42,240 --> 00:20:46,080 Speaker 1: be able to do that. I kind of didn't realize, uh, 343 00:20:46,119 --> 00:20:50,280 Speaker 1: the reality of that situation sex selection. But I mean 344 00:20:50,359 --> 00:20:54,880 Speaker 1: I I I hope that laureate feminist NG is accurate 345 00:20:54,960 --> 00:20:58,840 Speaker 1: about her silver lining viewpoint as far as like people 346 00:20:58,920 --> 00:21:02,159 Speaker 1: just being excited about baby, you know, I hope I 347 00:21:02,200 --> 00:21:04,520 Speaker 1: hope that there aren't gender revealed parties where people are 348 00:21:05,359 --> 00:21:09,080 Speaker 1: like genuinely sad. Yeah, that would be that would be 349 00:21:09,119 --> 00:21:10,920 Speaker 1: an awkward moment. I mean, like you said, if if 350 00:21:11,119 --> 00:21:14,240 Speaker 1: your friend had had a gender revealed party, it might 351 00:21:14,280 --> 00:21:17,119 Speaker 1: have had an awkward littlemit she would have I don't 352 00:21:17,119 --> 00:21:20,880 Speaker 1: even doubt that she would have cried. Oh, I can't 353 00:21:20,920 --> 00:21:25,879 Speaker 1: imagine be pregnant. I feel like being pregnant and disappointed 354 00:21:26,000 --> 00:21:28,879 Speaker 1: would be the combination of like physically the most uncomfortable 355 00:21:28,880 --> 00:21:31,280 Speaker 1: thing and mentally the most uncomfortable things. Yeah, I mean, 356 00:21:31,480 --> 00:21:33,800 Speaker 1: my friend is far from the only woman I've heard of. 357 00:21:33,880 --> 00:21:39,560 Speaker 1: Like my friend's mom um had her first child, who 358 00:21:40,520 --> 00:21:44,359 Speaker 1: was a boy, is a boy. Still had her second child, 359 00:21:44,359 --> 00:21:46,359 Speaker 1: who was also a boy. She was really hoping for 360 00:21:46,400 --> 00:21:50,720 Speaker 1: a girl, got pregnant the third time it was another boy, 361 00:21:50,800 --> 00:21:54,560 Speaker 1: and I mean she fell into a deep depression. Ah. Yeah, 362 00:21:54,640 --> 00:21:56,879 Speaker 1: I think we've got to do an episode on on 363 00:21:56,960 --> 00:22:01,359 Speaker 1: baby six then, because yeah, that's uh that that definitely 364 00:22:01,400 --> 00:22:05,720 Speaker 1: would drive home. Then Laurie's point of Hey, Lee, we're celebrating, 365 00:22:06,720 --> 00:22:10,199 Speaker 1: isn't this isn't this great? Yeah? But I think my 366 00:22:10,359 --> 00:22:13,480 Speaker 1: friend who had the two boys, and my friend's mom 367 00:22:13,520 --> 00:22:17,320 Speaker 1: who had the three boys kind of fit into uh 368 00:22:17,480 --> 00:22:20,480 Speaker 1: kind of science. Uh. You know, there there was a 369 00:22:20,480 --> 00:22:23,760 Speaker 1: Time article we read that that showed that parents actually 370 00:22:23,800 --> 00:22:27,440 Speaker 1: do have pretty strong um opinions about what they want 371 00:22:27,440 --> 00:22:29,760 Speaker 1: their kids to be, who they want their kids to be. Yeah, 372 00:22:29,760 --> 00:22:32,840 Speaker 1: they were reporting on a study publish in the journal 373 00:22:32,880 --> 00:22:37,240 Speaker 1: Open Anthropology which came out of Queen's University, and it 374 00:22:37,480 --> 00:22:42,920 Speaker 1: confirmed sort of a longstanding anecdotal assumption that women tend 375 00:22:42,960 --> 00:22:46,480 Speaker 1: to want daughters and men tend to want sons, and 376 00:22:46,520 --> 00:22:52,200 Speaker 1: at least from these more than two thousand participants in Ontario, 377 00:22:53,200 --> 00:22:58,200 Speaker 1: that pattern held up. Yeah. So, um, I don't know, 378 00:22:58,320 --> 00:23:01,600 Speaker 1: maybe everybody just should have parties when they're pregnant, just 379 00:23:01,720 --> 00:23:04,440 Speaker 1: like all the time. Let's just have parties that all 380 00:23:04,760 --> 00:23:08,480 Speaker 1: all the time, Kristen, I'm glad you exist. Let's have 381 00:23:08,520 --> 00:23:10,560 Speaker 1: a party. But that is one thing though, if you 382 00:23:10,640 --> 00:23:14,640 Speaker 1: are someone who doesn't have kids, doesn't want kids, uh, 383 00:23:14,680 --> 00:23:17,560 Speaker 1: you might feel the same way that Lizzie Skirnick over 384 00:23:17,600 --> 00:23:20,439 Speaker 1: the All did at the prospect of gender revealed parties, 385 00:23:20,480 --> 00:23:24,560 Speaker 1: where it's like, Okay, you're my friends and I love you, 386 00:23:24,720 --> 00:23:27,159 Speaker 1: and I went to your wedding and I went to 387 00:23:27,200 --> 00:23:29,800 Speaker 1: all the stuff associated with that. I'm gonna go to 388 00:23:29,840 --> 00:23:32,520 Speaker 1: your baby shower, I'm going to go to that child's birthdays, 389 00:23:33,560 --> 00:23:36,760 Speaker 1: and I gotta come to something else. Yeah, that's a 390 00:23:36,880 --> 00:23:41,200 Speaker 1: question like do you get to have a baby shower 391 00:23:41,320 --> 00:23:44,160 Speaker 1: if you also have a gender revealed party, absolutely, because 392 00:23:44,200 --> 00:23:46,520 Speaker 1: I come on, I well, I don't think people bring 393 00:23:46,680 --> 00:23:51,639 Speaker 1: presents because you can't. You can't gender stereotype pre gender 394 00:23:51,640 --> 00:23:54,920 Speaker 1: revealed party, so you don't bring the presents. I think 395 00:23:54,960 --> 00:23:59,240 Speaker 1: you just come and watch some one thrice into a cake. 396 00:23:59,760 --> 00:24:01,639 Speaker 1: I you know, honestly, I'm gonna go ahead and put 397 00:24:01,680 --> 00:24:03,320 Speaker 1: it out there. If any of my friends who want 398 00:24:03,359 --> 00:24:06,000 Speaker 1: to have babies Monday or listening, I probably would not 399 00:24:06,040 --> 00:24:09,399 Speaker 1: come to both. Yeah, I think I think, you know, 400 00:24:09,560 --> 00:24:12,000 Speaker 1: I am on a limited income people, and I don't 401 00:24:12,040 --> 00:24:14,960 Speaker 1: think I should be expected as a human person to 402 00:24:15,040 --> 00:24:18,680 Speaker 1: have to go to every single party. Yeah. I think 403 00:24:18,720 --> 00:24:22,080 Speaker 1: I think that the friends should definitely be allowed get 404 00:24:22,080 --> 00:24:24,880 Speaker 1: out of jail free kind of cards for things like that. 405 00:24:25,080 --> 00:24:28,440 Speaker 1: Although I am I am sure though again that there 406 00:24:28,480 --> 00:24:33,679 Speaker 1: are parents listening who I think exactly the opposite, like, 407 00:24:34,080 --> 00:24:36,600 Speaker 1: come on, come to my come to my parties. This 408 00:24:36,640 --> 00:24:38,760 Speaker 1: will be fun. Let us have fun. I need something 409 00:24:38,800 --> 00:24:42,440 Speaker 1: to put on Instagram. Don't we all know, don't we all? 410 00:24:42,760 --> 00:24:46,639 Speaker 1: But I think it's an interesting snapshot of sort of 411 00:24:46,760 --> 00:24:51,720 Speaker 1: where we are today in this our cultural landscape where 412 00:24:51,880 --> 00:24:54,440 Speaker 1: so much is driven by social media. We pick up 413 00:24:54,720 --> 00:24:58,520 Speaker 1: and spread trends so quickly through our Pinterest boards and 414 00:24:58,560 --> 00:25:06,520 Speaker 1: YouTube videos, and how we still though really celebrate the 415 00:25:06,600 --> 00:25:12,200 Speaker 1: most like traditional kinds of norms. I don't know, It's 416 00:25:12,240 --> 00:25:16,120 Speaker 1: like we're recycling the old and just a new kind 417 00:25:16,160 --> 00:25:20,679 Speaker 1: of way. And it was George Packer speaking of traditions. 418 00:25:20,720 --> 00:25:22,680 Speaker 1: It was George Packer over at The New Yorker who 419 00:25:22,760 --> 00:25:27,840 Speaker 1: said that, um, these parties are really a manufactured custom 420 00:25:27,880 --> 00:25:32,280 Speaker 1: in an instant tradition. And he says basically that, um, 421 00:25:32,359 --> 00:25:35,280 Speaker 1: it reflects our narcissism, and that we have moved away 422 00:25:35,320 --> 00:25:40,680 Speaker 1: from traditional sinners of worship, traditional religion and religious beliefs 423 00:25:40,680 --> 00:25:45,520 Speaker 1: and practices, and so we as the you know, YouTube 424 00:25:45,520 --> 00:25:50,520 Speaker 1: and Facebook generation, are kind of using our own fetus 425 00:25:51,240 --> 00:25:55,840 Speaker 1: as an excuse to kind of publicize ourselves. And I 426 00:25:55,880 --> 00:25:58,320 Speaker 1: don't I'm not going to say that he's right or wrong. 427 00:25:58,480 --> 00:26:01,160 Speaker 1: I think a lot of the critique of gender revealed 428 00:26:01,160 --> 00:26:03,840 Speaker 1: parties say more about the people who are critiquing them 429 00:26:03,840 --> 00:26:07,040 Speaker 1: than they necessarily do about the parties themselves. I agree, 430 00:26:07,240 --> 00:26:13,040 Speaker 1: I totally agree. I think that the reaction to this trend, tradition, 431 00:26:13,080 --> 00:26:16,400 Speaker 1: whatever you want to call it, is as informative as 432 00:26:16,440 --> 00:26:19,239 Speaker 1: the very events themselves. Yeah, a lot of people are 433 00:26:19,280 --> 00:26:22,080 Speaker 1: mad about social media and therefore will be mad about 434 00:26:22,119 --> 00:26:25,680 Speaker 1: anything that picks up steam on social media. Yeah, and 435 00:26:25,680 --> 00:26:29,400 Speaker 1: and really we need also to do probably an episode 436 00:26:29,440 --> 00:26:34,200 Speaker 1: about kids and social media and more the the parents 437 00:26:34,760 --> 00:26:38,160 Speaker 1: putting kids on social media, especially since all I feel 438 00:26:38,160 --> 00:26:40,359 Speaker 1: like all those apps came out not too long ago 439 00:26:40,440 --> 00:26:44,040 Speaker 1: about like, you know, replace pictures of your friends babies 440 00:26:44,080 --> 00:26:47,040 Speaker 1: on Facebook with a picture of a cat. Yeah, yeah, 441 00:26:47,520 --> 00:26:50,240 Speaker 1: you know. I mean there's a whole movement behind getting 442 00:26:50,320 --> 00:26:52,639 Speaker 1: rid of baby pictures on Facebook, which I don't. You 443 00:26:52,680 --> 00:26:54,040 Speaker 1: know what if I had a baby, I don't think 444 00:26:54,040 --> 00:26:56,960 Speaker 1: I'd be offinitive if my friend wanted to replace its 445 00:26:57,000 --> 00:26:59,600 Speaker 1: face with a cat face. I love cat faces, cat 446 00:26:59,600 --> 00:27:02,920 Speaker 1: face to great faces, baby faces mean whatever. Some days 447 00:27:02,920 --> 00:27:04,960 Speaker 1: I'd like to replace my own face with a cat face, 448 00:27:05,080 --> 00:27:07,920 Speaker 1: just for a day to day. Well, now it's time 449 00:27:08,000 --> 00:27:11,520 Speaker 1: for us to hear from you. Yes, you a listener 450 00:27:11,520 --> 00:27:14,320 Speaker 1: about gender reveal parties? Have you been to one? Have 451 00:27:14,440 --> 00:27:18,280 Speaker 1: you heard of them? Have you hosted one? What do 452 00:27:18,320 --> 00:27:20,440 Speaker 1: you think about all this? Because I especially to want 453 00:27:20,440 --> 00:27:24,520 Speaker 1: to hear from parents who might take a more sympathetic 454 00:27:24,520 --> 00:27:28,560 Speaker 1: approach to these parties. Let us know your thoughts. Mom 455 00:27:28,640 --> 00:27:31,280 Speaker 1: Stuff at Discovery dot Com is where you can email us. 456 00:27:31,520 --> 00:27:33,520 Speaker 1: As always, you can reach out to us on social 457 00:27:33,560 --> 00:27:37,000 Speaker 1: media as well, including Twitter at mom Stuff podcast, and 458 00:27:37,080 --> 00:27:39,560 Speaker 1: you can message us on Facebook as well, and we 459 00:27:39,600 --> 00:27:42,920 Speaker 1: have a couple of messages to share with you right now. 460 00:27:43,080 --> 00:27:48,880 Speaker 1: In fact, well, I've got an email here first of all, 461 00:27:49,040 --> 00:27:52,840 Speaker 1: in a response to our episode on women in hip Hop, 462 00:27:53,080 --> 00:27:56,040 Speaker 1: and this is from Erica and I really enjoyed her 463 00:27:56,440 --> 00:28:00,320 Speaker 1: type of the subject line because as I also tweeted 464 00:28:00,359 --> 00:28:02,399 Speaker 1: out when I received it, because it taken me so 465 00:28:02,520 --> 00:28:05,480 Speaker 1: much subject line as women in Wrap w R A P. 466 00:28:06,480 --> 00:28:09,199 Speaker 1: But she wrote, I found this podcast really interesting. I 467 00:28:09,200 --> 00:28:11,760 Speaker 1: came through high school in the late eighties early nineties 468 00:28:11,760 --> 00:28:15,040 Speaker 1: in the Bay Area and rap was huge. In particular, 469 00:28:15,119 --> 00:28:18,080 Speaker 1: I saw Queen Latifa as an amazing role model. She 470 00:28:18,119 --> 00:28:21,240 Speaker 1: didn't objective by herself and seemed so comfortable in her skin. 471 00:28:21,560 --> 00:28:23,159 Speaker 1: It made a huge difference to see a woman like 472 00:28:23,200 --> 00:28:26,240 Speaker 1: her getting it done in rap. And there were some 473 00:28:26,280 --> 00:28:29,280 Speaker 1: other people who also tweeted us at mom and Stuff 474 00:28:29,280 --> 00:28:33,879 Speaker 1: podcast about how yes, Queen Latifa and those other other 475 00:28:34,480 --> 00:28:39,000 Speaker 1: early female trailblazers in hip hop were so much about 476 00:28:39,360 --> 00:28:42,760 Speaker 1: empowerment and and less about, you know, being objectified in 477 00:28:42,800 --> 00:28:44,760 Speaker 1: any kind of way, and that was one reason why 478 00:28:44,840 --> 00:28:49,880 Speaker 1: they were inspired by early women in hip hop as well. 479 00:28:50,080 --> 00:28:53,080 Speaker 1: So thanks Erica. Already, I have a letter here from 480 00:28:53,080 --> 00:28:57,080 Speaker 1: Tara about our Women and Hunting episode. She this is 481 00:28:57,120 --> 00:29:00,360 Speaker 1: the first time she's ever written to us. Hello Tara, Hello, 482 00:29:01,520 --> 00:29:04,320 Speaker 1: she says. I'm from rural Maine, where many families hunt 483 00:29:04,320 --> 00:29:06,640 Speaker 1: for food and for fun. While it is mostly men, 484 00:29:06,720 --> 00:29:08,880 Speaker 1: there are plenty of women and children who hunt to 485 00:29:09,560 --> 00:29:12,200 Speaker 1: Just two seasons ago, the lunch lady from a nearby 486 00:29:12,200 --> 00:29:15,840 Speaker 1: school made the local news by bagging a sixteen point buck, 487 00:29:16,440 --> 00:29:19,800 Speaker 1: and she actually included links two articles about it in 488 00:29:19,840 --> 00:29:23,520 Speaker 1: a video and says that they featured some great main accents, 489 00:29:23,560 --> 00:29:26,600 Speaker 1: So if you want to find those, bangor Daily News 490 00:29:26,680 --> 00:29:31,080 Speaker 1: dot com and w b S News dot blogspot dot com. 491 00:29:31,120 --> 00:29:35,560 Speaker 1: And Caroline, I read the news article about this lunch 492 00:29:35,640 --> 00:29:41,120 Speaker 1: lady who shot the buck, and never before have I 493 00:29:41,160 --> 00:29:45,719 Speaker 1: read something that was so celebratory over this woman hunting. 494 00:29:45,720 --> 00:29:48,680 Speaker 1: When she she brought this buck back with her to 495 00:29:48,760 --> 00:29:52,280 Speaker 1: school because the kids wanted to see it so badly 496 00:29:52,840 --> 00:29:55,080 Speaker 1: and they were asking whether or not she would she 497 00:29:55,080 --> 00:29:58,200 Speaker 1: would cook any of the buck for lunch one days. 498 00:29:58,200 --> 00:30:01,520 Speaker 1: Apparently she had already brought in moose and elk in 499 00:30:01,680 --> 00:30:04,320 Speaker 1: in lunch's past, just for special treats. And they had 500 00:30:04,360 --> 00:30:08,200 Speaker 1: a photo of her with this buck and it was massive. 501 00:30:08,280 --> 00:30:12,520 Speaker 1: It was a two pound buck, and she was She 502 00:30:13,040 --> 00:30:16,840 Speaker 1: described how she just went out after work one day 503 00:30:16,880 --> 00:30:19,600 Speaker 1: and got into her the hunting stand and was just 504 00:30:19,640 --> 00:30:23,560 Speaker 1: hanging out playing solitaire to like keep herself busy and quiet, 505 00:30:23,720 --> 00:30:26,480 Speaker 1: and looked up and there it was. But I loved 506 00:30:26,480 --> 00:30:29,400 Speaker 1: it because it was in one photo caption described her 507 00:30:29,400 --> 00:30:34,560 Speaker 1: as a local celebrity. So the lunch lady, the huntress, 508 00:30:34,920 --> 00:30:38,360 Speaker 1: that's right. So thanks again to everybody who's written into us. 509 00:30:38,400 --> 00:30:40,800 Speaker 1: Mom Stuff at Discovery dot com is where you can 510 00:30:40,840 --> 00:30:45,280 Speaker 1: send your letters, and there is one and only one 511 00:30:45,360 --> 00:30:47,400 Speaker 1: place to go on the Internet for all of your stuff, 512 00:30:47,400 --> 00:30:49,440 Speaker 1: Mom Never told you, needs and desires of all our 513 00:30:49,480 --> 00:30:55,360 Speaker 1: podcast blogs, videos, and many many social media links, including 514 00:30:56,040 --> 00:31:00,080 Speaker 1: all new podcasts and podcast sources. So be sure to 515 00:31:00,160 --> 00:31:02,720 Speaker 1: check the website out. It's got a lot of great 516 00:31:02,760 --> 00:31:05,720 Speaker 1: stuff and you can find it at www. Dot stuff. 517 00:31:05,720 --> 00:31:11,719 Speaker 1: And I've Never Told You dot com for more on 518 00:31:11,760 --> 00:31:14,480 Speaker 1: this and thousands of other topics. Is it how stuff works? 519 00:31:14,520 --> 00:31:23,440 Speaker 1: Dot com