Speaker 1: This is the most dramatic podcast ever and I heard
Speaker 1: radio podcast. Hello everybody, and welcome to the most dramatic
Speaker 1: podcast ever. I'm Chris Harrison. I am so excited to
Speaker 1: be back with you each week, and the more I've
Speaker 1: gotten into doing this podcast, the more excited I get
Speaker 1: every week. And I miss not talking to you, So
Speaker 1: I look forward to our time together. And I want
Speaker 1: to say thank you to everybody that we have run
Speaker 1: into over the last two weeks. Elzi and I have
Speaker 1: been traveling. We were at the much talked about now
Speaker 1: Golf tournament in Orlando. I don't know if that that
Speaker 1: tournament has ever had so much press because I think
Speaker 1: thinking thinks in large part to Ben Higgins running into
Speaker 1: Chris Lane wells Adams was there, Ben's wife Jessica, and
Speaker 1: of course Sarah was there. L Z was there with me,
Speaker 1: and we had a phenomenal time. But the best part
Speaker 1: of it for me anyway, was running into all of you.
Speaker 1: We ran into so many people while and around at
Speaker 1: events or at the golf course and came up and
Speaker 1: said hello, which we always love. But what I really
Speaker 1: enjoyed personally was how many of you said you're listening
Speaker 1: to the podcast, how many said it's touched you. You
Speaker 1: were emotional. I I love it. I love all the notes.
Speaker 1: I appreciate it so much. And it was wonderful to
Speaker 1: see so many people. And then Elsie and I went
Speaker 1: to New York caught a little Broadway which was spectacular,
Speaker 1: and met even more people. But I was I'm wondering
Speaker 1: if this happens to anybody else, You have these little
Speaker 1: moments in life, they just kind of kick you in
Speaker 1: the ass and and humble you a little bit and
Speaker 1: put you in your place in a good way. Lauren
Speaker 1: and I after Sunday, we're leaving Orlando and we were
Speaker 1: at the airport. I was trying to catch that the
Speaker 1: Cowboys forty game unfortunately, and Lauren was not watching the game.
Speaker 1: But we were talking and chatting and we've been there
Speaker 1: for a little bit and right as our food arrived
Speaker 1: and this woman walks up. Now there's no reason really
Speaker 1: for me to be cranky, but I was tired, sunburn,
Speaker 1: probably a little dehydrated, been a long week, and I'm
Speaker 1: just sitting there about to watch the Cowboy game. This
Speaker 1: woman who had been sitting next to me came up
Speaker 1: to me and at very first that that moment I
Speaker 1: was I was thinking about being a little cranky, and
Speaker 1: the first sentence she says to me is, Chris, I
Speaker 1: didn't want to come up to you, but my mom
Speaker 1: listened to your podcast and she said, you love when
Speaker 1: people come up and say hello, and it immediately just
Speaker 1: and put me in my place, put me in a
Speaker 1: better mood. And we had an amazing conversation. I'm really
Speaker 1: glad she came up, and I'm glad all of you
Speaker 1: came up to us this week. Lauren and I had
Speaker 1: a blast with everybody. Each week, Elz and I are
Speaker 1: going to talk about the headlines, the stories that make
Speaker 1: us talk, the things we're discussing in our own lives, well,
Speaker 1: the headlines about relationships especially, and I love the name
Speaker 1: that you came up with the most dramatic headlines of
Speaker 1: the week with el Hi. Everybody, well, oh my gosh.
Speaker 1: The first one I wanted to talk about Nikki Bella.
Speaker 1: I don't know if you all have seen this, but
Speaker 1: Nicky Bella star of w W E Married, got married
Speaker 1: in August to Artem of Dancing with the Stars UM.
Speaker 1: I used to interview both of them a lot, and
Speaker 1: they're both so wonderful. But they get married and now
Speaker 1: their wedding is airing in her special about her wedding
Speaker 1: on E and it comes out that Nikki, we're a
Speaker 1: couple of wedding dresses and that one of them was
Speaker 1: from when she was engaged to actor John Cena. So
Speaker 1: everybody was talking is talking about this because can you
Speaker 1: wear a wedding dress from another marriage relationship when you're
Speaker 1: marrying someone else, And I completely I think you can.
Speaker 1: I support Nikki on this, but I was surprised how
Speaker 1: fired up people were, and that makes me want to
Speaker 1: ask you, what if I said to you, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: dig out the old one, We're going to recycle, reuse,
Speaker 1: and you know I'm going to throw it back on.
Speaker 1: I think I'm gonna say, first of all, I'm in
Speaker 1: Nicky Bella's camp on this. And by the way, Artom
Speaker 1: didn't care. He also came out and like, this isn't
Speaker 1: an issue. But I think the difference for us would
Speaker 1: be you actually wore your wedding dress at your wedding
Speaker 1: excellent point, as opposed to Nikki who just had this
Speaker 1: dress that spoke to her that she loves so much
Speaker 1: and she never got to wear it and she wants
Speaker 1: to wear it for this special occasion. Um, I don't
Speaker 1: know if I would have, if I would or will
Speaker 1: care that much if you actually wanted to wear your
Speaker 1: dress again, if you love it that much and it
Speaker 1: makes you feel beautiful. But I I think if you've
Speaker 1: never worn it. So in as far as Nikki goes,
Speaker 1: I don't understand why people are fired up either this. Look,
Speaker 1: you're gonna save ten fifty grand, however much these things
Speaker 1: cost these days. Why not. I think it's a really
Speaker 1: good headline because it says Nicky Bella wore her wedding
Speaker 1: dress from John Cena and her wedding to artem But yeah,
Speaker 1: when you dig a little deeper, so she had bought
Speaker 1: the dress, she'd never worn it, which is the key.
Speaker 1: Um gosh, I don't even know where my first wedding dresses.
Speaker 1: That don't most people like. They vacuum seal it, put
Speaker 1: it in a bag and then you just never touch
Speaker 1: it again. I'm not going to save it when we
Speaker 1: get married. I mean, I love you, but I think
Speaker 1: I donate it. I think there's something beautiful. I mean,
Speaker 1: oh my gosh. Sometimes you see women who are wearing
Speaker 1: like their grandmother's wedding dress from the fifties, and it's
Speaker 1: totally gorgeous. But I don't think i'll I don't feel
Speaker 1: that attached to the stuff. To me, it's just I
Speaker 1: would just get rid of it. I wouldn't want to
Speaker 1: deal with storing it. Well, I don't know what you're
Speaker 1: going to do. We actually haven't discussed this, but um,
Speaker 1: for example, at Wells and Sarah's wedding, she had I
Speaker 1: don't know, three, four or five dresses Nikki Bella talked
Speaker 1: about having. This was one of several dresses that Nikki
Speaker 1: wore as well. So is the dress even that big
Speaker 1: of a thing anymore? I know this is probably a
Speaker 1: celebrity deal where you wear multiple dresses. Oh interesting, as
Speaker 1: opposed to that one wedding dress. So really a lot
Speaker 1: of brides don't have just one dress anyway anymore. True, Well,
Speaker 1: you're still the one you walk down the island, that's
Speaker 1: the one, right. But I think you made such a
Speaker 1: good point about you just said she felt beautiful in
Speaker 1: and I think that hits the nail on the head
Speaker 1: for me because at first you look at it and think, well,
Speaker 1: this dress is attached to this past relationship but the
Speaker 1: dress is really about the woman. I think it's about
Speaker 1: you wanting to feel beautiful for the person that you love.
Speaker 1: But it's about you feeling beautiful and so to me,
Speaker 1: that moment people talk about the moment she said she
Speaker 1: had cried in this stress. That's when you look in
Speaker 1: the mirror and think, Okay, I feel like a bride.
Speaker 1: I feel that this is the moment I want to
Speaker 1: have on my wedding day that I've thought about. So
Speaker 1: if she felt that in that moment about this dress,
Speaker 1: I had to say it. But I think it's more
Speaker 1: about you than it is about the guy, because again,
Speaker 1: it's about you being the right person, but it's about
Speaker 1: how you, how you've pictured looking for when you find
Speaker 1: that right person. Can I tell everybody why this story
Speaker 1: was personal to us, why it kind of hit home? Okay,
Speaker 1: so um LZ. When we first moved in together, she
Speaker 1: brought an ice bucket, this beautiful crystal ice bucket, but
Speaker 1: it was monogrammed. You actually were excited about it? Yes,
Speaker 1: I was excited because it said L and Cee l C.
Speaker 1: I thought, wow, this is great Lauren and Chris Well.
Speaker 1: Can I also say I love that you thought it
Speaker 1: was great, because you could have thought that was so
Speaker 1: weird moving in. I've already monogrammed you thought this is
Speaker 1: so sweet. But it turns out Lauren's ex husband his
Speaker 1: first name began with the letter C as well. So
Speaker 1: just turns out those initials worked perfectly for both of us.
Speaker 1: And so the ice bucket was from my first marriage. Yeah,
Speaker 1: the ice bucket was from her first marriage. It was
Speaker 1: a wedding gift to Lauren and her ex. But hey,
Speaker 1: it can quickly transition into Lauren and Chris. So she
Speaker 1: told me about this. I had no problem. It was
Speaker 1: a beautiful ice bucket. It has our initials on it.
Speaker 1: I believe in being environmentally friendly, and I did not
Speaker 1: see the point and throwing that ice buck it away.
Speaker 1: It speaks to your confidence in you in our relationship,
Speaker 1: and I loved that it didn't bother Artem like you said,
Speaker 1: Artem said, Artem said, I want you to be happy.
Speaker 1: It shouldn't be a big deal if you're secure in
Speaker 1: your relationship and where you're at. Um. I had a
Speaker 1: friend of mine who told me that when she moved
Speaker 1: in with her boyfriend, she made him get rid of
Speaker 1: all the clothing that he'd worn with his ex. He
Speaker 1: had to buy all new furniture, he had to redo
Speaker 1: their house. She said, I think things are memories and
Speaker 1: I am not moving into that environment. And she and
Speaker 1: I talked about it for a while because it sounded
Speaker 1: really extreme to me, as say, sounded expensive. What would
Speaker 1: your reaction be if a woman had said that? Honestly
Speaker 1: a bit of a red flag for me. Yeah, because
Speaker 1: he goes back to what you're talking about, the confidence.
Speaker 1: If I am with you and I love you, do
Speaker 1: I need a new flannel shirt to prove it? You know? Look,
Speaker 1: I get if you're walking around and it's odd that
Speaker 1: you have so many pictures or keepsakes that remind you
Speaker 1: of that other person. There are levels to this, but
Speaker 1: I think to just hey, I need you to get
Speaker 1: a new couch, knew everything we gotta paint. That's extreme.
Speaker 1: That's a lot. To me, that's a lot. Okay, Well,
Speaker 1: now we have to confess one other thing about when
Speaker 1: we first started dating. Crap. What I had forgotten until
Speaker 1: this very moment that when we first started dating, I
Speaker 1: had a house, and I had one of those. It
Speaker 1: was an older house, so it had like a front
Speaker 1: sitting room that I never went in and you came
Speaker 1: to pick me up and I wasn't ready yet. Shocker.
Speaker 1: So I said, go just go chill, I'll be ready
Speaker 1: in a minute. And you went in that room and
Speaker 1: I come in to find you, and you go, huh,
Speaker 1: you've still got your wedding photos framed in here. All
Speaker 1: your setting pictures were still up. But speaks to your confidence.
Speaker 1: It wasn't a big deal. No, I mean, I knew
Speaker 1: you'd been married. I mean, look, I mean I am
Speaker 1: definitely not going to be throwing stones in this glass house. No,
Speaker 1: I mean married for quite some time. I have children.
Speaker 1: So everybody brings baggage to a relationship. That's what makes
Speaker 1: us who we are, and it's it's it's what got
Speaker 1: us from here to there. And it's what I love
Speaker 1: about you because you've grown from that. I've grown from
Speaker 1: my relationships. So you can't have it both ways. Well,
Speaker 1: and when my friends said get rid of everything, I thought,
Speaker 1: now you're taking it to the point of your potentially
Speaker 1: hurting the person you care about, right if you're telling
Speaker 1: them get rid of your past, get rid of erase
Speaker 1: your memories. I would never ask someone to erase their memories.
Speaker 1: For me, that's part of what made them the person
Speaker 1: they are. I don't think you can regret where you've been.
Speaker 1: If you love where you are, you can't change your past.
Speaker 1: If you like the person you are today, all those
Speaker 1: things got us here. So I would never say get
Speaker 1: rid of all this stuff whatever. Um, but I do
Speaker 1: understand that some things you gotta You've got to talk
Speaker 1: about it, right? Are some things a little too painful?
Speaker 1: Is it? Hey? I don't know if I want you
Speaker 1: to wear your wedding dress from the first person at
Speaker 1: this marriage now, maybe everybody wouldn't have been okay with it.
Speaker 1: And I actually think if Artem had said I don't
Speaker 1: want you to do this, I think Nikki would have said, Okay,
Speaker 1: no big deal. So let me ask you this, Elsie.
Speaker 1: M hm. Is there a deal breaker? Is there one
Speaker 1: thing you should not carry over from a prior relationship?
Speaker 1: Can you think of anything? My first answer is trust issues? Right?
Speaker 1: I love that That made you laugh. I'm being serious, Okay.
Speaker 1: I was talking to another friend the other day. She's
Speaker 1: going through a major marital issue. She has found out
Speaker 1: her husband is having an affair, and she said to me,
Speaker 1: how whether they stay together or not? She said, how
Speaker 1: can I trust again and the analogy that I gave
Speaker 1: her God. I mean that's tough, right because I've always
Speaker 1: heard that phrase, once the mirror is broken, you can
Speaker 1: put it back together, but you still see the cracks.
Speaker 1: But I think you have to you have to trust again.
Speaker 1: You have to give whether this person, whether her husband,
Speaker 1: is deemed worthy of her trust again or not. First
Speaker 1: of all, to me, it's all about effort. Are you
Speaker 1: showing are you actively showing that you can change, that
Speaker 1: you're sorry, that you're going to be better. But I said,
Speaker 1: if you've got in a car accident, would you ever
Speaker 1: drive again? Would you get behind the wheel? And I
Speaker 1: think the answer is yes. And I especially think if
Speaker 1: you're going if we're just talking about going into a
Speaker 1: new relationship, you have to give that person your full
Speaker 1: trust until they give you a reason not to. You
Speaker 1: have to trust them and not carry over that past
Speaker 1: issue because otherwise you're setting yourself up for failure. I
Speaker 1: think it's a move on, but don't forget mm hmm,
Speaker 1: you know, be vigilant, be smart. It's all about that communication.
Speaker 1: But I agree it's you know, it's the old theory
Speaker 1: if you fall off a horse, get a bike, because
Speaker 1: you're not good at riding a horse. Now that's not
Speaker 1: the saying. Um, we should do a new segment called
Speaker 1: dad Jokes of the Week, the most dramatic. What would
Speaker 1: you not carry over from a previous relationship? You know
Speaker 1: it is something we just mentioned. Pictures would be weird
Speaker 1: to me if you're like, I love this wedding picture
Speaker 1: or I love this picture. We talked about women looking beautiful.
Speaker 1: I look amazing in this wedding photo. Look, if you
Speaker 1: want to cut out your ex husband, I'd be fine,
Speaker 1: but I think it'd be weird if if if someone
Speaker 1: who you love and started dating seriously had pictures and things,
Speaker 1: mementos and things from their ex, well, I would Okay,
Speaker 1: I'll add a caveat. But if you have kids, I
Speaker 1: think I remember we were in the Great Lockdown. I
Speaker 1: was going nuts, and I was cleaning out your entire
Speaker 1: house because they had nothing else to do. And I
Speaker 1: love to organize. Oh my gosh, I love organizing, and
Speaker 1: I learned even more about you doing that. I I
Speaker 1: learned that Chris Harrison, literally, at face value, is an
Speaker 1: incredibly organized, neat, clean person. But if you open a
Speaker 1: cabinet door, things come falling out. I mean I opened
Speaker 1: one cabinet in your house and you just had empty
Speaker 1: cardboard boxes in there, Like, what are we doing? You
Speaker 1: never know when you need a box. Well, that's true.
Speaker 1: You never know. You're not an adult until you've saved
Speaker 1: boxes and chords. But one, you know, you had photos
Speaker 1: from like your first marriage, from that time, and we
Speaker 1: saved all that. I saved all that because I think
Speaker 1: the kids are gonna want to see it, and that matters.
Speaker 1: I still have them. And you know, again, as I
Speaker 1: you just pointed out, I had kids and watch these
Speaker 1: children grow up for seventeen years before we got divorced.
Speaker 1: So yes, a lot of those memories and things happened together,
Speaker 1: and I will keep those, like you said, to pass
Speaker 1: them on, but I definitely don't have them on display.
Speaker 1: You're not gonna walk around our house here and awesome. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but even you you mean you had been freshly divorced,
Speaker 1: it was. It's something that I think I would understand
Speaker 1: if you had a problem with that, where you're like, hey,
Speaker 1: can you write pictures are emotional emotional and they bring
Speaker 1: up emotion right away, and they bring up emotion for
Speaker 1: everybody else who walks in your house say, we have
Speaker 1: a party and people are walking around like is that
Speaker 1: Chris with his ex wife? Right? Of course, and it's
Speaker 1: something that's on display, like you said. And we'll going
Speaker 1: back to my friend who told the guy she was
Speaker 1: moving in with to get rid of everything. Something she
Speaker 1: said did stick with me and really made me even
Speaker 1: think about myself. I think I came home and probably
Speaker 1: just you know, did that thing where I start a
Speaker 1: fight with you because I'm having a thought of an
Speaker 1: emotion and I'm not expressing it well. But she said,
Speaker 1: you know, things are memories. Items are memories, and I
Speaker 1: do think there's some truth to that. And actually one
Speaker 1: thing you and I had talked about, which is an
Speaker 1: important sort of next part of a relationship is building
Speaker 1: a home together. The importance of that. We love our
Speaker 1: house in Austin so much because we picked out everything together.
Speaker 1: We chose everything from the wallpaper to the chairs to
Speaker 1: all of it, and so this feels like our place.
Speaker 1: And there is an importance of stuff both and letting
Speaker 1: it go and getting those new building that new world together,
Speaker 1: even if it's that physical item world. Should I throw
Speaker 1: away the ice bucket, I'll throw away the ice bucket.
Speaker 1: We still have it. I thought it broke. No, no, no,
Speaker 1: it didn't. It's you. That's a great it's a great
Speaker 1: ice bucket, really thick crystal, like someone spent a lot
Speaker 1: of money on it. You know. Let's move on. I
Speaker 1: think it's time for the next headline. Okay. For Dallas
Speaker 1: Cowboy fans, we wish we could erased the last several weeks. Um.
Speaker 1: This is an interesting story and it's not about sports,
Speaker 1: but it is about Dallas cow Boys quarterback Deck Prescott,
Speaker 1: who was hugely popular. He's popular for the franchise. He
Speaker 1: handles himself incredibly well as the captain of this ship,
Speaker 1: and is that leader in the locker room, leader in
Speaker 1: the press room, always does and says the right thing. Well,
Speaker 1: Dak arguably had one of the worst seasons of his career.
Speaker 1: Got bounced from the playoffs a couple of weeks ago,
Speaker 1: lost to the San Francisco forty nine. I'm from Dallas.
Speaker 1: My heart is in this. I'm a huge Dallas Cowboy fan.
Speaker 1: A few days later, I see the headline Dak breaks
Speaker 1: up with his girlfriend, and I'm thinking, God, what a
Speaker 1: crappy week this guy has had. He played terrible, his
Speaker 1: team lost, He's getting hammered, I mean hammered in the press,
Speaker 1: even a little bit of shade thrown by his own
Speaker 1: franchise for the first time. And then I see he
Speaker 1: breaks up with his girlfriend. Really a terrible week he's
Speaker 1: he's having. But then the next day this headline hits. Well,
Speaker 1: all of a sudden, I am interested in sports. I
Speaker 1: actually turned to you and said, did you see the
Speaker 1: sideline about Dak Prescott. I mean, I don't know any athletes,
Speaker 1: but I do love you and your Cowboys fans, so
Speaker 1: I didn't know who that was. One day after the
Speaker 1: news breaks that he and his longtime girlfriend of a
Speaker 1: couple of years split, news comes out that he is
Speaker 1: dating someone new. Twenty four hours later, and he is dating.
Speaker 1: At twenty nine years old, Dak Prescott is dating an
Speaker 1: l s U Jr. A twenty year old swimmer at
Speaker 1: L s U. Dak years old just signed a hundred
Speaker 1: and sixty million dollar contract I believe somewhere around those
Speaker 1: numbers is now dating a twenty year old junior in college. Now,
Speaker 1: the reason you and I were talking about this so
Speaker 1: much is the age difference thing. Do you get asked
Speaker 1: about this a lot? I mean, you're I'm not great
Speaker 1: at malf I think you're seventeen years older than Meldre.
Speaker 1: Wait how old are you? But yes, all age difference,
Speaker 1: and so immediately our thought has always been age is
Speaker 1: not a big deal. It's not a big difference. But
Speaker 1: is it hypocritical for me to say there is a
Speaker 1: point in time in life when it does matter. You
Speaker 1: and I always talk about the difference of life places,
Speaker 1: and I also think the age difference thing is very
Speaker 1: person a person. Now, I don't know. Maybe this um
Speaker 1: young woman is incredibly mature for her age. And by
Speaker 1: the way, maybe Dak Prescott is incredibly immature for his age,
Speaker 1: but he's not. I've seen him in the public eye.
Speaker 1: He is a very mature man. Oh you are such
Speaker 1: a cowboys. I am no, I've just I mean, I've
Speaker 1: seen him talk, in the way he handles himself, the
Speaker 1: way the team looks at him. He wasn't born yesterday. Well,
Speaker 1: the reason this stuck out to us is because to me,
Speaker 1: and again I don't know either of them, but I
Speaker 1: think it's potentially a big problem when you're talking about
Speaker 1: someone who's in their professional life dating someone who's still
Speaker 1: in their college life. Now, I did want to ask
Speaker 1: you if she's an l s U swimmer. I don't
Speaker 1: know our college sports on the same level of professional sports.
Speaker 1: This is totally different. And I'll tell you what he's
Speaker 1: because he's the quarterback for the Alice Cowboys. Yes, one
Speaker 1: of the most storied, richest franchises in the history of sports.
Speaker 1: It's a big deal. And to be the quarterback for
Speaker 1: the Dallas Cowboys, it's like being, you know, shortstop for
Speaker 1: the Yankees. It's a big deal. You are front and center.
Speaker 1: I don't know if that comparison helps me, but you
Speaker 1: so what struck me and struck a chord with me?
Speaker 1: And again I'm dealing with is this hypocritical? I have
Speaker 1: a nineteen year old daughter. This woman that Dac is
Speaker 1: dating is barely a year older than my daughter, who's
Speaker 1: also in college at TCU, And I immediately thought, what
Speaker 1: if Taylor was dating a twenty nine year old man,
Speaker 1: especially such a prominent man. I that made my heart
Speaker 1: skip a beat. I'm not gonna lie now. I'm just
Speaker 1: going with my gut emotion of how I felt about this.
Speaker 1: And I'm not trying to throw judgment on this because
Speaker 1: I don't know these people that well. I'm not friends
Speaker 1: with Dak. I don't know this swimmer, But I just
Speaker 1: thought from my own perspective, that would scare the hell
Speaker 1: out of me as a dad. If my daughter said, hey, Daddy,
Speaker 1: I met this wonderful man. First of all, man, she's like, yeah,
Speaker 1: he's twenty nine years old, he's a stockbroker, he's or whatever.
Speaker 1: That that would give me pause. Well, again, it's such
Speaker 1: a life place difference. And I don't think I realized
Speaker 1: this when I was in my twenties, are in college.
Speaker 1: But when you look back, I remember my mom telling you,
Speaker 1: telling me there's so much change that happens in your twenties.
Speaker 1: I mean, you go through so many major life phases
Speaker 1: between being in college, then just graduating and adjusting, then
Speaker 1: your mid twenties when you're really hitting your stride in
Speaker 1: your career. Then you're late twenties when you're thinking should
Speaker 1: I settle down? Now? You go through like four phases
Speaker 1: of life in those ten years. And would you say,
Speaker 1: I mean you're again, I think you're older than me.
Speaker 1: Would you say, looking back that your twenties are a
Speaker 1: pivotal time of change versus your thirties, forties, fifties, How
Speaker 1: would you compare them well? And yes, those you don't
Speaker 1: know what you don't know, like, for example, my son's
Speaker 1: twenty one, he's a junior, my daughter's nineteen, she's a freshman.
Speaker 1: You don't know what you don't know, but at the
Speaker 1: time you think you do right. And this is where
Speaker 1: it gets interesting of protecting your children and thinking of
Speaker 1: this dynamic of twenty nine and and this woman who
Speaker 1: was a teenager a year ago and their dating is.
Speaker 1: She may feel like she has control of this situation,
Speaker 1: may feel like she's fine, but does she know you know,
Speaker 1: she just doesn't have those that life experience. And to
Speaker 1: going back to your question, Yes, in your teens, your
Speaker 1: late teens into your early twenties, you are growing and
Speaker 1: learning so much and you are just getting these life experiences.
Speaker 1: It's why we all date and break up and you
Speaker 1: have heartbreak and someone cheats on you, and it's where
Speaker 1: all a lot of those silly antics happen is in
Speaker 1: those early formative years. And to jump right into something
Speaker 1: that is so extreme on many levels, not just the age,
Speaker 1: but to somebody who is so famous and world renowned,
Speaker 1: it makes it even that much more interesting. And you
Speaker 1: bring up the dad thing, and my child, Dak, actually
Speaker 1: met this woman through the dad. The dad does something
Speaker 1: in insurance or something he deals with the Dallas Cowboys,
Speaker 1: and that's how they met. Oh, there's a lot to
Speaker 1: unpack there. Yeah, there was like a post, an Instagram
Speaker 1: post on the dad a while back about, you know,
Speaker 1: kind of joking about he and Dak being best friends.
Speaker 1: And so that is clearly how Dak met his daughter
Speaker 1: and they have started dating. Now she's still in school,
Speaker 1: so this isn't a day to day thing, so who
Speaker 1: knows what it is. But I just found it very interesting. Obviously,
Speaker 1: it hit a chord with me, and I know most
Speaker 1: of you out there are parents as well, and just
Speaker 1: thought we would have strong feelings about this. Well, I
Speaker 1: look at our our age difference is bigger, right, But
Speaker 1: you and I have talked about how if we'd met
Speaker 1: at a different time, maybe we wouldn't be together. Timing
Speaker 1: is important. If I was in my early twenties, I
Speaker 1: would have been in a totally different life place and
Speaker 1: would it have worked out. I don't know. I mean
Speaker 1: we started dating when I was in my early thirties,
Speaker 1: which is I'm well into my career. You know, we
Speaker 1: both were established in our careers and that was different.
Speaker 1: And I think that timing matters and life place matters
Speaker 1: way more than the number of age. Life place matters. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and by the way, I mean we're we lived in
Speaker 1: l A for decades. There's very immature fifty year olds
Speaker 1: in l A. There are some fifty some things I
Speaker 1: wouldn't date in l A. Well, I find it interesting too.
Speaker 1: Upon my divorce, I started dating, and I dated a
Speaker 1: wide range of ages from older than me, too younger
Speaker 1: than me, And I found you get to a certain
Speaker 1: point again, this has to do with life place and experience.
Speaker 1: What do you share, what do you have in common?
Speaker 1: What conversations are you having on a very deep level?
Speaker 1: With you and I we found that we had a
Speaker 1: lot of commonality. We hit a lot of those buttons
Speaker 1: together and checked off a lot of those boxes, which
Speaker 1: is partly why we fell in love. As we've realized
Speaker 1: we were in the same life place and UM could
Speaker 1: go forward. But if you are dating someone that just
Speaker 1: got out of their teenage years and is partying in college,
Speaker 1: it's like, I don't know. I mean, I have conversations
Speaker 1: with with my daughter and her roommates and her sorority sisters.
Speaker 1: These aren't conversations I want to take much further than
Speaker 1: just finding out how they're doing and hearing the stories.
Speaker 1: So here's the question. If if Taylor came to you
Speaker 1: tomorrow and said, God, I'm sweating now. I am dating
Speaker 1: this guy. He's almost thirty, he's a we'll use your phrase,
Speaker 1: he's a stockbroker, something like that, what do you say
Speaker 1: to her? What do you say? I would have to
Speaker 1: have a very long conversation, and I would want to
Speaker 1: meet this man. A lot of it would have to
Speaker 1: do with who this man is, what are his intentions?
Speaker 1: And again they're just dating and just starting. So I
Speaker 1: don't mean, what are your intentions of marrying my daughter?
Speaker 1: But who are you? And what is it about my
Speaker 1: daughter you find interesting at the age of twenty, you know, like,
Speaker 1: what what is she offering that you find so fascinating
Speaker 1: and where's the depth and the meaning behind this relationship?
Speaker 1: So I would I would want to have that discussion
Speaker 1: with her. What does she seeing him, what is she
Speaker 1: getting from this? And who is he? And what's he
Speaker 1: yell about? And that might be way overstepping my bounds.
Speaker 1: As I say that, I realize it is that early
Speaker 1: in a relationship, but it is to me a little extreme. Well,
Speaker 1: we wish dak all the best. I wish I wish
Speaker 1: the Dallas Cowboys the best. Okay, deep down and yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean look, it's the judgment part is is difficult
Speaker 1: in all this. But I just you and I found
Speaker 1: it very interesting. And that was one of the most
Speaker 1: dramatic headlines of the week. The next dramatic headline brings
Speaker 1: me to our guest today. Bonnie Bartlett, year old actress,
Speaker 1: just released a memoir Middle of the Rainbow, where she
Speaker 1: made it known that her marriage to Bill Daniels, famous
Speaker 1: actor in his own right was an open marriage for
Speaker 1: many years. They have made it work. They've been married
Speaker 1: for seventy two years. I have a lot of questions.
Speaker 1: We're going to get answers from Bonnie Bartlett when we
Speaker 1: come back. Welcome back to the most dramatic podcast ever.
Speaker 1: I'm Chris Harrison. Time to bring on my guest today.
Speaker 1: Bonnie Bartlett, year old actor, just released a memoir Middle
Speaker 1: of the Rainbow. You may know here from so Hopes
Speaker 1: Little House in the Prairie, saying elsewhere, most recently in
Speaker 1: Golden Girls better called sal An amazing career, Emmy Award
Speaker 1: winner married to Bill Daniels, who you guys might remember
Speaker 1: as Mr Feenie on Boy Meets World. That's right, Mr
Speaker 1: Feenie married to Bonnie Barlett for seventy two years. In
Speaker 1: her memoir, she goes into her amazing career in Hollywood.
Speaker 1: But one of the things I wanted to touch on,
Speaker 1: and one of the things that struck me is her relationship,
Speaker 1: her marriage and how in the early fifties they were married,
Speaker 1: their marriage was open. What does that mean? How did
Speaker 1: they stop that which they did, how did they claw
Speaker 1: it back? And how do they still have that trust?
Speaker 1: How do they keep going for this many decades? Bonnie,
Speaker 1: thank you so much for your time. How are you
Speaker 1: doing today. I'm fine, I'm a good shape. Congratulations on
Speaker 1: the book Middle of the Rainbow, and thank you for
Speaker 1: giving us such an intimate glimpse into your amazing life
Speaker 1: in Hollywood. Um, this show in particular is about relationships
Speaker 1: and about love, and this look inside your marriage over
Speaker 1: the last seventy two years is just fascinating. So thank you.
Speaker 1: You're welcome. I'm glad. I'm glad. I mentioned earlier. You're
Speaker 1: married to Bill Daniels. Mr Feeney, please how John app
Speaker 1: One of the great revelations from this book was that
Speaker 1: early on you were eighteen years old when you got
Speaker 1: married and I believe nineteen fifty one, and you guys
Speaker 1: had an open relationship. We didn't think of it that. Okay,
Speaker 1: that's what I was going to ask. You paid me
Speaker 1: a picture of your relationship and and if you could
Speaker 1: define it to us, what was it? Well, we kind
Speaker 1: of grew up together. We're very young. Bill and I
Speaker 1: were just great friends, great lovers, great We just loved
Speaker 1: to be with each other all the time. And later
Speaker 1: on when things got a little more difficult and we
Speaker 1: could had to be a part a lot and stuff
Speaker 1: like that. And we were in a culture in New
Speaker 1: York when we went to New York, and a culture
Speaker 1: that was very free and easy. It was before aids
Speaker 1: aids changed that culture. But you mentioned that this is
Speaker 1: the nineteen fifties, and Grant and I was not around
Speaker 1: in the nineteen fifties. But my image is that was
Speaker 1: a really buttoned up conservative time. We think of the
Speaker 1: sixties as being really free and into the seventies, that's right,
Speaker 1: and that's why because the fifties, you were you know,
Speaker 1: you were still the Victorian thing was still creeping in.
Speaker 1: We couldn't have sex and lest we got married, you know.
Speaker 1: And then yes, then the sixties rolled in and it
Speaker 1: was like while than Woolley, and you had to find
Speaker 1: your way through it. And if you did, you you
Speaker 1: were good. And when we were together we were fine.
Speaker 1: It's just when we had to be separated or there
Speaker 1: were times, yes, yes, very much, times when Bill was
Speaker 1: just too difficult for me and I, uh, but he
Speaker 1: was so funny, you know, as I would say, you know,
Speaker 1: I just don't think I should be married to you.
Speaker 1: I just still think it's always out come on you.
Speaker 1: You're crazy about it both, so you wouldn't consider it
Speaker 1: an open marriage. But both of you had affairs early on,
Speaker 1: and and did you know about each other's affairs? Oh, yes, yes,
Speaker 1: mostly mostly yes, of course. I didn't have a lot
Speaker 1: of affairs. Bill had a lot, some dalliances on the road.
Speaker 1: I experienced something that today women go through three and
Speaker 1: four times before they get married. You know. Well, that's
Speaker 1: what it sounds like. It sounds like y'all were very
Speaker 1: good friends. You still had some growing up to do,
Speaker 1: and it seems like you guys did that together exactly.
Speaker 1: That's what we did together. And and and the book
Speaker 1: will Will talks about that. I mean that, that's what
Speaker 1: the book. That's part of what the book is about.
Speaker 1: The book is really about the I've had a ninety
Speaker 1: three years on this earth and the changes that have
Speaker 1: happened during that time. It's a history, it's a it's
Speaker 1: a learning thing, which is the way it was then.
Speaker 1: And and we we took it. We didn't we we
Speaker 1: didn't speak up. We didn't we we couldn't. If we
Speaker 1: did speak up, we got pushed down. So things all
Speaker 1: of women have made made it change. And the all
Speaker 1: the old men can't do everything. That any man in
Speaker 1: power I thought he could do anything, and they did
Speaker 1: and we put up with it. Now that's not so.
Speaker 1: So how did you guys make it work? How did
Speaker 1: you and Bill? Because I know there was one final
Speaker 1: affair that really drew that was later on, that was
Speaker 1: very paid, that was very yes, that was a big
Speaker 1: shot in the seventies. And that's when Bill made the
Speaker 1: choice too let his career go. He knew he had
Speaker 1: to make a living, but I mean he didn't. He
Speaker 1: had been offered three shows in New York after seventeen
Speaker 1: seventies Chicago, Bob fosse uh, And he said, no, I
Speaker 1: want to go to California and I want I'll work
Speaker 1: in film or whatever there is, but I want to
Speaker 1: be have a house and I want to have uh
Speaker 1: the kids there, and I want I want to just
Speaker 1: do whatever. He didn't want to do television. He thought
Speaker 1: he would be doing enough film. Turned out that television
Speaker 1: was the best thing that ever happened to Bill. He
Speaker 1: loved it, loved it. I'm just curious how you found
Speaker 1: the trust again. Well, it took time. But you know,
Speaker 1: he's a great father. He's a great he's very domestic.
Speaker 1: He we we had suddenly we had weekends where we
Speaker 1: could do things with the kids. Always in New York.
Speaker 1: Every Christmas, everything, he had two shows. Other people were celebrating,
Speaker 1: and Bill always had two shows to do. And you know,
Speaker 1: it was okay, It's what he aimed for. But when
Speaker 1: the kids came along, it wasn't good. It wasn't good anymore.
Speaker 1: When did you share this story with your with your
Speaker 1: kids or your friends? Did everybody find out when this
Speaker 1: book came out? My children haven't read the book. Interesting
Speaker 1: they're not interested. We were there, mother and father very
Speaker 1: glad to be with us. We were very They saved
Speaker 1: our lives, they saved our marriage. The boys because they
Speaker 1: were so great. I was just curious if there was
Speaker 1: ever a time when you would sit them down and
Speaker 1: talk about as their adults. And No, I'm not a
Speaker 1: person who says, now, let's let's talk about this. I'm not.
Speaker 1: I'm just not that kind of person. Yeah, you guys
Speaker 1: just kept plowing through, living your lives right, doing what
Speaker 1: is what is what is. And I, for me, California
Speaker 1: meant I got to work a lot, So I went
Speaker 1: back to work. I had stopped working with when the
Speaker 1: boys were a little I stopped because it was too hard.
Speaker 1: But you know, commercials, a few little things. But when
Speaker 1: I when we got to California and I had Bill
Speaker 1: doing all kinds of things with boys, and he could
Speaker 1: take them to school, and he could pick them up,
Speaker 1: and he could do all of that stuff. I mean,
Speaker 1: he was in heaven. And and because he was so happy,
Speaker 1: I was happy and able to do to do the
Speaker 1: things I wanted to do. You guys have been together
Speaker 1: seventy two years, a lifetime together. A lot of the
Speaker 1: listeners are married, we've been divorced. We we've been through
Speaker 1: it all, and we talk a lot about relationships here.
Speaker 1: Is there a takeaway from your seventy two years? Is
Speaker 1: there a lesson that we should know about making it
Speaker 1: work and sticking with it? I think every case is different.
Speaker 1: Each case is different. If if you're living with somebody
Speaker 1: who has a drug problem, if you're living with somebody
Speaker 1: who's an alcoholic, like and they don't change, if the
Speaker 1: person can change, if the problem is such that they
Speaker 1: can change, which is what Bill. Finally, did you know
Speaker 1: if you fall in love with somebody else, that's a problem.
Speaker 1: Fortunately for us, we never got involved, right, You guys
Speaker 1: never fell in love with anybody else. There. There were
Speaker 1: those affairs, but you always came back to each other,
Speaker 1: that's right. As I say, at one point, I thought,
Speaker 1: oh god, I've got to have an easier life. It's
Speaker 1: got to be better than this angry guy. Uh. But
Speaker 1: there's nobody out there like Bill that I met. You
Speaker 1: know that I would it. We're lucky. We're just lucky. Yeah,
Speaker 1: we it worked out. I mean, we can't imagine not
Speaker 1: being together. Let me put that away. We can't imagine
Speaker 1: it and now we're old, we take care of each
Speaker 1: other and it's great. Yeah, it was just you said
Speaker 1: building trust took time. I'm just curious if there was
Speaker 1: something in particular, because it sounds like y'a weren't great communicators.
Speaker 1: How you were able to build that trust back? Well,
Speaker 1: we were together all the time. We we we were
Speaker 1: in the same room, the same house. I think it's
Speaker 1: very hard to have a marriage where you're not together.
Speaker 1: What's the point, right? There were some amazing anecdotes and
Speaker 1: a memoir as well. You mentioned coming up around the
Speaker 1: same time that Marilyn Monroe did well. Marilyn was a
Speaker 1: big star and she to studied with Lee Strasburg, and
Speaker 1: I was Lee's secretary and friend and so forth, and
Speaker 1: so I kind of helped her out in class, and
Speaker 1: she she always she was. She was a lovely girl.
Speaker 1: We loved her. We all loved her. I saw her
Speaker 1: a lot at the Strasburg's and I guess I saw
Speaker 1: the best part of Marilyn Monroe. I don't know. I mean,
Speaker 1: what she created was incredible, and she was an incredible comedian.
Speaker 1: She wanted to do try to do theater, and Lee
Speaker 1: encouraged her and maybe he shouldn't have because I, Oh,
Speaker 1: she wanted to learn. She was such a student. She
Speaker 1: wanted to learn, and she wanted to she was interested
Speaker 1: in everything, and she had a very good brain. No education,
Speaker 1: no background, no support, no support at all. Interesting as
Speaker 1: a as a girl growing up terrible, terrible, So that's hard.
Speaker 1: You've got to have some support somewhere. The book is
Speaker 1: Middle of the Rainbow memoir by Bonnie Barlett. If there
Speaker 1: is a takeaway from this book that you hope everyone
Speaker 1: will read, what is that? What is the takeaway? What
Speaker 1: is what is the lesson you hope we take away
Speaker 1: from this? Well, as I say in the book, I
Speaker 1: hope that I have left some footprints in the sand,
Speaker 1: so that it's kind of a history of a life.
Speaker 1: Ah a successful life, a celebration in a way of
Speaker 1: the life and getting through life is all about solving problems.
Speaker 1: And that's what this book is about. M beautiful and
Speaker 1: is if you gave after seventy two years, gave us
Speaker 1: one bit of advice for marriage and making it work,
Speaker 1: what is it? You have to create your own guidelines,
Speaker 1: You have to create I love that and I completely agree.
Speaker 1: And speaking speaking of unique Bonny, you were that absolutely
Speaker 1: unique and thanks thanks for sharing so much of your
Speaker 1: life with us in this book. Again, it's the Middle
Speaker 1: of the Rainbow, the memoir by Bonnie Bartlett, her life,
Speaker 1: her times, her love and career. It is spectacular and
Speaker 1: just thank you for being here today and opening up
Speaker 1: with us. Truly appreciate it. Thank you. Thank you to
Speaker 1: my guest, Bonnie Bartlett. Incredible story thinking of the times
Speaker 1: that you grew up in, cut her teeth in this
Speaker 1: business from the fifties, sixties, seventies and on um. Incredible
Speaker 1: knowledge and it's always important, I think, to hear from
Speaker 1: the past so we can learn how to live in
Speaker 1: the present. So Bonnie Bartlett, thank you so much. LZ.
Speaker 1: Thanks for being a part of this as well today
Speaker 1: and thank you for listening. I can't wait to talk
Speaker 1: to you again next week because we have a lot
Speaker 1: more to talk about. Thanks for listening. Follow us on
Speaker 1: Instagram at the most dramatic pod ever and make sure
Speaker 1: to write us a review and leave us five stars.
Speaker 1: I'll talk to you next time.