Speaker 1: Welcome to Dirty Rush, The Truth about Sorority Life with
Speaker 1: your hosts me Gia, Judice.
Speaker 2: Davy Kent and Jennifer Fessler.
Speaker 3: Hi, you guys, welcome back to another episode of Dirty Rush.
Speaker 3: I am Jen Fessler, and today we're jumping into part
Speaker 3: two of.
Speaker 2: Moms Gone Wild.
Speaker 3: So this time we're actually talking about moms in a
Speaker 3: little bit of a different way. What lengths will moms
Speaker 3: go to in order to get their daughter into the
Speaker 3: top sorority. I'm a little scared of this episode, you guys.
Speaker 3: I'm scared of thinking back and thinking what did I
Speaker 3: do to try to help Rachel get into the right sororities?
Speaker 2: So I just.
Speaker 3: Remember Rush costing me a lot of money, too much money,
Speaker 3: and not feeling like I could really say no to Rachel.
Speaker 3: But she, you know, did not want the sorority that
Speaker 3: I was in A five, so I didn't really there
Speaker 3: was no strings I could pull there. But let's talk
Speaker 3: to some girls who did have moms either pull strings
Speaker 3: or maybe you know, do we're a little bit extra
Speaker 3: in terms of helping their daughters get in to top sororities.
Speaker 3: All right, let's bring in Page.
Speaker 4: Hi High, Page, Hi, how are you.
Speaker 2: I am very well. Thank you.
Speaker 3: My middle name is Paige, and I I know I
Speaker 3: wish it was my first name.
Speaker 4: Oh my god, that's amazing.
Speaker 2: Same page. Yes, thank you for joining us here a
Speaker 2: dirty rush.
Speaker 4: Yes, thank you for having me.
Speaker 5: So my story is a little bit interesting. So I
Speaker 5: was on a recruitment team for a school in Arizona,
Speaker 5: and at this school, the moms definitely went a little
Speaker 5: bit wild when it came time for their daughters to
Speaker 5: go through recruitment. So we would often as recruitment team,
Speaker 5: actually get gifts from the mom's for example, cookies, brownies, popsicles, stickers,
Speaker 5: and not only were they just gifts, but the gifts
Speaker 5: had their child's name and face printed on them. Come on,
Speaker 5: so they would literally let's stout out the houses.
Speaker 4: Yeah, literally, crazy thing.
Speaker 5: Ever, they would scout off the houses during work week,
Speaker 5: like the week before rush, and whenever they had like
Speaker 5: they thought like a split second to like if someone
Speaker 5: were to be walking out, they would run out of
Speaker 5: their cars with all of these gifts and be like,
Speaker 5: oh my god, yeah, like my daughter kate Lee, for example,
Speaker 5: is so excited to come see your house hopefully next week.
Speaker 6: Like here's page.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna puke a little bit in my mouth. Yea, yes,
Speaker 2: did your mother do this? Because I'm gonna feel bad.
Speaker 4: Talking absolutely not. My mother would never in a million years.
Speaker 3: Okay, because I am going to throw up a little bit.
Speaker 3: You're telling me this is a true story. Yeah, actually
Speaker 3: try to give you gifts to yeah, grow under the
Speaker 3: category of get a life.
Speaker 7: Get a life please.
Speaker 5: Yes, it was just like the craziest thing. Like it
Speaker 5: wasn't even like the kids themselves. It was literally the
Speaker 5: moms that were like just so excited and honestly like
Speaker 5: not even like ashamed of it, which I thought was
Speaker 5: the craziest thing ever. And then like as a recruitment team,
Speaker 5: like we were not to be accepting these gifts like
Speaker 5: at all, right, so we'd kind of like just take
Speaker 5: it and then like literally throw it away.
Speaker 4: And if anything, it was like weird, like we were not.
Speaker 2: Like happy, uncomfortable. I mean, did blew into the way you.
Speaker 3: Like looked at the recruits Like I think it.
Speaker 5: Like kind of like subconsciously, yeah, because like your literal
Speaker 5: mom is here trying to like buy us these two
Speaker 5: dollars brownies and bunkcakes.
Speaker 4: This is so so desperate.
Speaker 2: Like awful craziest thing. Yeah, yeah, so funny.
Speaker 3: When I talk to you guys, I always feel so
Speaker 3: much better about my parenting.
Speaker 4: Absolutely right.
Speaker 2: I didn't give anyone.
Speaker 3: I'd never gave anybody a gift, right, literally the weird
Speaker 3: maybe teachers back in elementary school. I don't know, but yeah,
Speaker 3: good Christmas. That's weird, and wha could.
Speaker 4: Do so weird? Honest thing I've ever seen.
Speaker 8: Did happen a lot, uh honestly, like more than you
Speaker 8: would expect, like the vast majority Like no, but there
Speaker 8: was definitely like a pretty big group of uh like
Speaker 8: new members that were buying gifts and bringing.
Speaker 2: I wonder if their daughters even knew about it.
Speaker 4: That is, honestly probably not right.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean I don't know if I've ever told
Speaker 3: daughter I was going to drop off a gift to
Speaker 3: the recruitment chair. I can't even imagine.
Speaker 7: No, I would.
Speaker 4: Know that you're making this verse for.
Speaker 3: Me, and also like have a little faith in me, mom,
Speaker 3: like I don't bribe people like total me, then maybe
Speaker 3: I don't belong there.
Speaker 4: Totally craziest thing.
Speaker 3: Yeah, well that's a really good story page. Thank you
Speaker 3: so much for coming on.
Speaker 7: Thank you appreciate it.
Speaker 2: Love that name.
Speaker 7: Thanks bye bye.
Speaker 6: Hi Hi Sarah, Hi down. I'm a huge fan. I
Speaker 6: love O vees.
Speaker 2: Yeah, oh my god, that's so nice.
Speaker 6: Thank you so much, making queen, I loved you.
Speaker 2: I didn't really work, but I tried, all right.
Speaker 3: So, Sarah, you are an SMU girly.
Speaker 2: Yes, I am as you are, all right.
Speaker 3: So tell us a little bit about crazy moms at SMU.
Speaker 2: What did they do?
Speaker 9: Oh well, let me tell you. Majority of the girls'
Speaker 9: moms got them what we call a rush coat.
Speaker 3: Oh god, we did this. Yep, Sarah, we did a
Speaker 3: whole episode in this. When we first started the pod,
Speaker 3: it was well, I'm sorry, I don't mean to cut
Speaker 3: you off. My opinion on it was was pretty harsh,
Speaker 3: but please go on.
Speaker 9: Well, basically, these moms would pay lots of money for
Speaker 9: their daughters to get sort of trained on what to
Speaker 9: say during SMU rush, which I don't know if you know,
Speaker 9: is a really.
Speaker 6: Really difficult experience.
Speaker 9: Yeah, and these coaches would sort of train you on
Speaker 9: what to say, what not to say, almost like these
Speaker 9: girls were reading a script rather than you know, having
Speaker 9: a genuine conversation. I want to say about you know,
Speaker 9: fifty percent of the girls all got a rust coach.
Speaker 3: Well, I don't know. We spoke to these coaches. They
Speaker 3: charged thousands of dollars, thousands, not hundreds, thousands, right, Oh yeah.
Speaker 3: And I felt kind of badly because, you know, speaking
Speaker 3: to the actual coaches, they you know, they felt good
Speaker 3: about what they were doing, as they should, and they
Speaker 3: felt like it was almost like preparing for a job interview.
Speaker 2: And they really helped these girls.
Speaker 3: So, you know, I hate to be judge, but I
Speaker 3: tend to be judge, So I don't know. I just
Speaker 3: I would say, like if my kid asked me for
Speaker 3: thousands of dollars for a rush coach, I think I
Speaker 3: would say, well, I don't think rushing is for you
Speaker 3: if you're if we're that desperate that we have to
Speaker 3: spend thousands of dollars to get someone to tell us
Speaker 3: what to say and what to wear, maybe not so
Speaker 3: much exactly.
Speaker 9: And you know, for the other fifty percent of the girls,
Speaker 9: you know who didn't have a rush coach, I almost
Speaker 9: felt like their experience was way more fun.
Speaker 6: They met really people, they were a lot more open.
Speaker 9: I feel like the idea of how the rush coach
Speaker 9: was almost pressure, A.
Speaker 6: Lot more pressure, for sure.
Speaker 2: And could you tell you think like when someone had
Speaker 2: a coach and when they didn't.
Speaker 6: Oh for sure?
Speaker 9: Really why just because it was, like like I said earlier,
Speaker 9: it was almost like talking to someone who had like
Speaker 9: a script in the back of their mind, right there
Speaker 9: is going off you know what you know.
Speaker 6: This brush coach told them to say, rather.
Speaker 3: Than you know, having an actual conversation, right right, Wow,
Speaker 3: listen again. I mean, I try in life not to
Speaker 3: be judging, but I find myself in this context.
Speaker 2: I just I spent thousands.
Speaker 3: Of dollars for college tutors and essay t prep and
Speaker 3: all of that, but it feels to me like there's
Speaker 3: something that is just wrong about someone to tell your
Speaker 3: kid how to act like right, and it's a little much.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, we're on the same page with that. Definitely
Speaker 2: that we are. Well.
Speaker 3: Thank you so much for coming on and sharing with us, Sarah,
Speaker 3: appreciate you, luck with everything, Thank.
Speaker 7: You love.
Speaker 2: All right, guys, So next we have Gemma.
Speaker 6: Hi, Gemma, Hi, thank you so much for having me.
Speaker 2: Thank you for coming to Dirty Rush.
Speaker 1: Okay, so my story about Mom's Gone Wild doesn't have
Speaker 1: to do with my own mom.
Speaker 6: My mom is really not a helicopter parent.
Speaker 1: She was pretty chill about grades and getting and she
Speaker 1: just wanted me to go, like to the best school
Speaker 1: that I wanted to get into. Was never intense intense, right,
Speaker 1: but she was not And with the whole sorority thing.
Speaker 1: She was in greek life, but she wasn't super pushy
Speaker 1: about me being in greek life or not. Like my
Speaker 1: sister dropped out of sorority sophomore year and she was
Speaker 1: totally fine with it. Like she just always kind of
Speaker 1: wanted us to do our own thing and be happy
Speaker 1: with whatever her choices.
Speaker 9: Was.
Speaker 2: Love that.
Speaker 1: But during college I tutored for this pretty well off
Speaker 1: in elite LA family that had very high expectations and
Speaker 1: the mom was definitely like manager of the house and
Speaker 1: particularly was very invested in her daughter and her daughter
Speaker 1: getting into certain.
Speaker 6: Colleges, the best colleges she could get into.
Speaker 2: You were tutoring this is while you were in college.
Speaker 6: While I was in college. So I went to school in.
Speaker 2: La Okay, so Okay got it, and.
Speaker 1: I tutored her throughout her like high school year. So
Speaker 1: I started when I was a freshman and she she
Speaker 1: was a sophomore. So by the time I was a senior.
Speaker 1: She was in her freshman year at USC Okay, and
Speaker 1: this mom I tutored her throughout, like with writing, reading,
Speaker 1: helped her with her college essays, like I any at
Speaker 1: a moment's notice, my mom would call me and I
Speaker 1: would hop on a zoom and help her daughter with anything.
Speaker 1: I mean, they paid me a very pretty penny.
Speaker 2: I was gonna say, I hope they paid you well, Okay.
Speaker 6: Very well.
Speaker 1: But I was pretty much on at their disposal all
Speaker 1: the time. And then I was heavily involved in my
Speaker 1: sorority and she she eventually got into USC, and I
Speaker 1: was very heavily involved in recruitment at my school at
Speaker 1: UCLA and she so I didn't have anything to do
Speaker 1: with USC, but I coached her through her. Like the
Speaker 1: next best thing after getting into college was that the
Speaker 1: mom really wanted her daughter to get into a good sorority.
Speaker 6: So she was like, do anything you can.
Speaker 2: Was a daughter that into it or was it more
Speaker 2: than mother?
Speaker 1: I think like she definitely was. She definitely really wanted to,
Speaker 1: especially at a school like USC where it's pretty high pressure.
Speaker 6: And I think the social just social life at US.
Speaker 1: I think it's just like at another tier, you've just
Speaker 1: just like a lot of wealth, and there's a lot
Speaker 1: like Greek life is very intense there.
Speaker 6: They're very into their alumni.
Speaker 1: And writ their sports and so it's just like at
Speaker 1: another level that I don't think usc Are UCLA operates on.
Speaker 8: Right.
Speaker 1: So I think that she wanted it, but I think
Speaker 1: the mom wanted it more. Okay, And she was like,
Speaker 1: take her through zoom lessons, tell her what she needs
Speaker 1: to say, what would get her into a sorority? What
Speaker 1: is what does she need to have her Instagram? Look like,
Speaker 1: what are the outfits? I'll pay whatever. We just want
Speaker 1: to get this done.
Speaker 2: I ask you.
Speaker 3: You you don't have to, you don't have to tell us,
Speaker 3: but I'm gonna ask anyway, Like what were you getting
Speaker 3: paid an hour for this bullshit?
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna reveal, but it was upwards it was
Speaker 1: like more than anyone.
Speaker 2: Makes, Like was it over fifty dollars an hour?
Speaker 6: It was upwards of fifty dollars an hour.
Speaker 2: Wow, Wow, I'll take that job if you know.
Speaker 6: Yeah, And it was very nice as like a broke college.
Speaker 2: Kid who no doubt.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 1: So, and I grew very close with this family, very
Speaker 1: close to the daughter, and I still am I didn't
Speaker 1: like necessarily agree with the tactics there. I just think
Speaker 1: like it's just very different from how I was raising,
Speaker 1: how my mom operated, But there were different expectations there
Speaker 1: and just a different Yeah I feel like caliber, yes,
Speaker 1: but yeah, so I like coached her through or talked
Speaker 1: to her through her rush experience each night.
Speaker 6: We talk after each.
Speaker 1: Round, and it ended up that at the end of it,
Speaker 1: she didn't end up getting down to some houses that
Speaker 1: she wanted, and I kind of had I had a
Speaker 1: heavy role in my recruitment process.
Speaker 2: No, no, I just know where this is going.
Speaker 1: Okay that the mom kind of indirectly asked me if
Speaker 1: there was anything that I could do to call over,
Speaker 1: like just not sorority, not an other sorority, but in
Speaker 1: my sorority at UCLA had a corresponding sorority at USC.
Speaker 2: Right, and asked that I make a phone call.
Speaker 6: Make a phone call, and that's all I'll say.
Speaker 2: There, Well, you can't leave us hanging at that. Did
Speaker 2: you do it?
Speaker 6: I did, Paul, I did.
Speaker 2: Okay, you don't tell us that she got in or not.
Speaker 6: But mostly it was not about money or do it
Speaker 6: it was.
Speaker 1: It was mainly that I called them saying I know
Speaker 1: this girl very well. I've worked with her now for
Speaker 1: four years. She is kind, she is smart, and I
Speaker 1: think that you made a mistake.
Speaker 7: Did it help?
Speaker 6: And it helped, That's all I'll say.
Speaker 2: So I mean a few things about that.
Speaker 3: First of all, I can feel the mother's pain, right
Speaker 3: like you when your kid doesn't get into the house
Speaker 3: that they want. And I do get that. But right
Speaker 3: there's like a lesson in there, like you're not going
Speaker 3: to always get what you want. And I know what
Speaker 3: happens then, and you know, we haniwe's pull strings. But
Speaker 3: was it that was it a difficult thing for you?
Speaker 3: Did you try to say no? Are you like you
Speaker 3: know what?
Speaker 2: That's fine? I love her.
Speaker 6: I definitely deliberated over it because, like.
Speaker 1: I mean, like I just see how I went through
Speaker 1: the rush process and not to be like all hi
Speaker 1: and mighty, but I went through at fair and square.
Speaker 1: I was someone who knew nobody California, Like I went
Speaker 1: to CLA and I'm from the Midwest, Like I didn't
Speaker 1: know a single soul, and I think that the rush
Speaker 1: process worked out for me. So this seemed like this
Speaker 1: is going kind of against nature. Like yes, I really
Speaker 1: believe that like the process should work as it is supposed.
Speaker 6: To without yeah, without intervention.
Speaker 1: I was kind of like, I don't I don't know that, Like,
Speaker 1: is she going to be happy if this, if these people,
Speaker 1: if these girls didn't initially like the car that they
Speaker 1: had or didn't like them enough to invite her back.
Speaker 6: So that's what I told them, Like, I did say
Speaker 6: that with the.
Speaker 1: Mom and I had to have a really close way,
Speaker 1: and I did say that to her and she was like,
Speaker 1: I understand that, but don't you think that you know,
Speaker 1: she should be in this story? And I was like, absolutely,
Speaker 1: I think they're dumb to not bring her back, But
Speaker 1: that was the decision that they made anyway. So I
Speaker 1: just advocated on her behalf and it and it did help.
Speaker 1: I think they were like we overlooked her.
Speaker 2: And okay, but did she know that you were doing that?
Speaker 6: The daughter does not know.
Speaker 3: Now that's the part that's interesting. I mean, the whole
Speaker 3: thing is it's an interesting story, But for me, at least,
Speaker 3: the most interesting part is that the mother didn't tell
Speaker 3: the daughter right and put you in a position of
Speaker 3: doing that without, you know, telling this person that you
Speaker 3: knew and cared about.
Speaker 2: So that's a little bit.
Speaker 3: That's the part that really just just would upset me,
Speaker 3: is that you have to have a certain amount of
Speaker 3: confidence in your kid, right and let them navigate. Also,
Speaker 3: that's just part of going to college. And I, by
Speaker 3: no means am I a perfect mother. But that's what
Speaker 3: occurs to me when you're telling me the story, is
Speaker 3: that I don't know that mother. It sounds like she's
Speaker 3: just getting or was getting in her kid's way. Right,
Speaker 3: I'd be able to detach a little.
Speaker 6: Bit well, and I think at some point the other
Speaker 6: shoe is going to drop.
Speaker 3: But I just yeah, yeah, oh, I mean, listen, you can't.
Speaker 3: I will tell you this, Like I, if it was
Speaker 3: up to me, my kids would never feel pain. But
Speaker 3: that's not realistic and that's not the world that we
Speaker 3: live in, and I can't protect them from it. I
Speaker 3: have to let them, you know, feel the pain and
Speaker 3: grow from it. Maybe that kind of rejection it's okay,
Speaker 3: you know, because we all will get rejected if it's
Speaker 3: not you know, by a sorority, it's by a boyfriend
Speaker 3: or a job or you know, all the different ways
Speaker 3: that that people can tell us no, so anyway, But yeah,
Speaker 3: but so I think they probably put you in a
Speaker 3: weird position, but hopefully it all worked out and she
Speaker 3: is happy and more importantly, you're happy.
Speaker 6: Yeah, certainly happy now and I think that Yeah. I
Speaker 6: just wish the best for them.
Speaker 3: So good for you. Okay, Well, really appreciate your sharing
Speaker 3: this with us.
Speaker 6: Hey, thanks Jen, Bye bye bye bye.
Speaker 2: All right, you guys.
Speaker 3: So that is it for this episode of Dirty Rush.
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Speaker 2: Bye you guys.