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Speaker 1: It's the radio segment that finally filled a void in

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Speaker 1: the charity community that's been desperately needed. That's great hair

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Speaker 1: transplants for kid mustaches, helping little boys feel like real

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Speaker 1: men with a nice mustache transplant.

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Speaker 2: Don he's loving it.

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Speaker 1: Donate yours to Laser Stories, the segment where we read

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Speaker 1: weird news stories around the globe, just like everyone else does,

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Speaker 1: except we've got a laser and there's other dink waffles.

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Speaker 1: Just don't This first laser story is out of New Jersey.

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Speaker 1: Thirty six year old Jay Vaughn listed his two thousand

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Speaker 1: and seven Chevy pickup on Facebook marketplace and said it

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Speaker 1: was in excellent shape.

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Speaker 3: That's great.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, he was hoping to get around nine four hundred

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Speaker 2: for the pickup.

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Speaker 3: All right, I mean that seems like a great deal.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, actually does. I'm sure he did. The Kelly Blue

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Speaker 2: Book thing sounds about right, and you're supposed to do.

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Speaker 3: We're just making up numbers.

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Speaker 2: Wouldn't you know it.

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Speaker 1: A potential buyer called and they both agreed he could

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Speaker 1: come by to check out the vehicle and seal the deal.

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Speaker 4: Okay, why is this in the news. I'm concerned about

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Speaker 4: what's going wrong?

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Speaker 3: I know.

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Speaker 2: The unthinkable happened.

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Speaker 1: At the exact moment the buyer was pulling up to

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Speaker 1: Jay's home. A deer leapt over a fence, jumped two

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Speaker 1: other vehicles, and landed right in the bed of the

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Speaker 1: truck for sale.

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Speaker 3: Wait, so the truck comes with dinner.

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Speaker 2: No, it doesn't, because the deer ran off.

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Speaker 1: Unfortunately left behind a very large dent in the.

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Speaker 2: Side of the once Christine vehicle. Oh my god, it's crazy.

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Speaker 1: The video you can see the deer literally jumps in

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Speaker 1: as soon as.

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Speaker 2: The buyer is walking up to it. The chances so

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Speaker 2: Jane and the other man were in shock.

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Speaker 1: Thankfully the guy was there to see it happen, otherwise

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Speaker 1: he wouldn't have believed it. The good news is Jay

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Speaker 1: still ended up selling it to him, but at a

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Speaker 1: nine hundred dollars discount.

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Speaker 3: Oh man, that's pretty good.

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Speaker 1: You can actually watch the video of the whole thing

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Speaker 1: up on our Instant Stories at brook and Jeffery check.

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Speaker 2: It's pretty unbelievable.

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Speaker 1: This next Lazer story is out of pig skin headquarters.

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Speaker 1: So much food, Okay, Brooks thinking of actual pork belly.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, not even the actual pig, just the skin of

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Speaker 2: the pit. You're not going to believe this, but.

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Speaker 1: There's a conspiracy online making the rounds, and it has

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Speaker 1: to deal with the.

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Speaker 4: NFL football season all the things that go with it.

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Speaker 1: So excited hundreds of fans are convinced they already know

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Speaker 1: who's going to be playing in the Super Bowl this year.

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Speaker 4: I mean, oh yeah, that's rumor's been around for so long,

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Speaker 4: right that it's all stage scripted. There's no way these

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Speaker 4: players care too much.

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Speaker 1: Too well, there's more evidence they say they know it.

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Speaker 1: If you look closely at the Super Bowl logos. Super

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Speaker 1: Bowl fifty five, that was the logo was orange and yellow,

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Speaker 1: and that year the yellow La Rams beat the orange

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Speaker 1: Cincinnati Bengals. Dan, if you guys see the picture that

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Speaker 1: we're looking at right.

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Speaker 2: Now, this is crazy.

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Speaker 1: We have all the logos and the teams for each year,

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Speaker 1: and the logos come out before the Super Bowl.

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Speaker 3: Ever happens like this year's super Bowl logo is already out.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: So last year's logo for the Super Bowl in Arizona

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Speaker 1: looked like an Arizona sunset.

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Speaker 2: It was green and red, and who played in that game?

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Speaker 1: The green Philadelphia Eagles and the red Kansas City.

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Speaker 3: Chiefs teams have the same colors.

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Speaker 1: So now we get to this year and the logo

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Speaker 1: for Super Bowl fifty seven is red, pink and purple.

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Speaker 3: Okay, who's pink Barby's playing day.

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Speaker 1: There's still ninety plus days until the big game, but

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Speaker 1: fans are saying they already know it's gonna be the

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Speaker 1: San Francisco forty nine Ers against the Baltimore Ravens. Red

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Speaker 1: for San Francisco, purple for Baltimore Ravens.

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Speaker 4: But red was for Kansas City the year before, but

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Speaker 4: now Red's for San Francisco.

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Speaker 2: Well, San Francisco's the NFC, and so they can't have

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Speaker 2: against Baltimore. The small problem with.

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Speaker 1: The theory is, like you guys were saying, there's other

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Speaker 1: teams that have similar colors, and there is some inside

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Speaker 1: arguing already with people saying, no, this is going to

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Speaker 1: be the Chiefs and the Minnesota Vikings this year.

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Speaker 2: A red and purple?

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Speaker 1: Okay, so should you put all of your money on

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Speaker 1: those guys?

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Speaker 2: Jose and I are actually headed to Vegas right after

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Speaker 2: the same.

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Speaker 1: This next Slazer story is out of Booze News. Did

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Speaker 1: you know kolu ascented perfume is now a thing?

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Speaker 2: That actually exists.

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Speaker 4: It's supposed to the smell of my mom's best friend

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Speaker 4: in the nineties.

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Speaker 1: It's supposed to smell like an Espresso Martini. So vodka,

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Speaker 1: kalua and coffee.

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Speaker 3: No, smell like vodka. You take a sniff of vodka

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Speaker 3: and you're like, mayde alcohol.

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Speaker 1: Well, they're doing it as part of the Espresso Martini's

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Speaker 1: fortieth birthday this year, and it's selling for one hundred

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Speaker 1: and five dollars a bottle.

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Speaker 2: Whoa still one on me? You can do that already.

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Speaker 1: Next up, a brand new, unique flavored liquor arrives this month.

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Speaker 1: It's from a place in New Hampshire and their new

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Speaker 1: brandy tastes exactly like smoked trouts.

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Speaker 3: Oh my god, I love No. I've never what are

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Speaker 3: you putting fish alcohol in? I guess maybe a camado?

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Speaker 2: You know they do that?

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Speaker 4: They do juice and vodka, yeah, or bloody Mary.

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Speaker 3: That's a day.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: They're gonna start selling it for sixty five dollars a bottle.

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Speaker 1: And they also that same company has a whiskey that

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Speaker 1: tastes like crab and another that tastes like your meat.

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Speaker 2: Now it sounds good, do you bro again? They are

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Speaker 2: like ruining the things Like I love crab, I don't

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Speaker 2: want to drink crab.

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Speaker 3: To be honest, Elk would be a lot more tasty.

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Speaker 4: Elk has so much better than deer, you guys, Deer

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Speaker 4: is pretty gamey and chik elk is delicious.

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Speaker 3: Minutes ago, I know, maybe you're gonna order get some elk.

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Speaker 1: Finally, last, but not least, in our booze news roundup,

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Speaker 1: a new report found Americans surprisingly are not the biggest

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Speaker 1: binge drinkers in the world.

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Speaker 2: No way, Well.

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Speaker 3: It's got to be Irish, is it Irish?

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Speaker 1: Sure we are up there. Turns out Denmark ranks first.

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Speaker 1: Thirty seven percent of all Danes have done some binge

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Speaker 1: drinking in the past month.

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Speaker 2: Wow, over a third of the country.

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Speaker 3: Are they just all crashing bikes over there? Isn't that

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Speaker 3: the big Denmark thing?

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Speaker 1: Well, then after them it's Romania They're thirty six percent,

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Speaker 1: then the UK at thirty five percent, and the US

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Speaker 1: is a distant penth at twenty three percent.

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Speaker 3: To Alexis, you need to do some more work this weekend.

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Speaker 2: You know, guys, I don't think I'm an alcoholic. I

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Speaker 2: should start up again.

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Speaker 4: Fall behind bro Maybe that's why Jose we usually dropped

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Speaker 4: down all because he know, yeah, because I.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, Okay, I with that.

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Speaker 1: It's funny though, if you look at the stats for

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Speaker 1: just women, we rank higher.

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Speaker 2: We're fourth in the world.

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Speaker 3: Oh yeah, because we're liberated.

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Speaker 1: Twenty percent of American ladies have gotten hammered sometime in

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Speaker 1: the past month. Right now, speaking of booze news, this

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Speaker 1: guy doesn't touch the stuff.

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Speaker 3: Okay, that's good.

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Speaker 1: Last time he had some tequila, he blacked out and

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Speaker 1: woke up in Mexico with a shell on backwards. That

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Speaker 1: sound means Laser Stories has come to an end for

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Speaker 1: the day. We'll do it again, same time on Wednesday.

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Speaker 3: Freaking Jeffrey in the morning.