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Speaker 1: My partner and I just had a massive argument over

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Speaker 1: the temperature of water. To set the scene, I thirty

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Speaker 1: five mail, like to drink cold or chilled water, and

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Speaker 1: my partner, thirty three female, likes room temperature pre boiled water.

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Speaker 1: To accommodate for both our needs, we have a kettle

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Speaker 1: for boiling water, after which it is transferred to two

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Speaker 1: water jugs, which are either left at room temperature or

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Speaker 1: used to reap out the dispenser in the fridge.

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Speaker 2: By the way, this.

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Speaker 1: Comes from warm water TA on the r slash. Okay,

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Speaker 1: storytime supread onto the situation. Three months ago, I emptied

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Speaker 1: both room temperature jugs into the fridge and boiled more

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Speaker 1: water at night before bed. Partner came down and was

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Speaker 1: furious that she had no room temperature water to drink,

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Speaker 1: and we came to an agreement. Don't fill up both

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Speaker 1: jugs into the dispenser and leave her one. Yeah, everyone

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Speaker 1: just gets their own jug. Fast forward to today. There

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Speaker 1: was going to be some burst water main repairs outside

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Speaker 1: by the utility company, so in the morning, before my

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Speaker 1: partner woke up, I decided to make sure that we

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Speaker 1: had enough water to drink.

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Speaker 2: I've filled the.

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Speaker 1: Dispenser with one jug, then halved the room temperature water

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Speaker 1: in the other jug into both.

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Speaker 2: We had previously shattered a jug on a.

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Speaker 1: Cold day they poured boiling water in it, so I

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Speaker 1: thought i'd temper this by making sure that the boiling

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Speaker 1: water would enter lukewarm water, reducing chances of shattering the jug.

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Speaker 1: I went back to work and thought nothing of it.

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Speaker 1: Partner wakes up and goes down, and she's fierce. She

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Speaker 1: doesn't have any room temperature water. I try to placate

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Speaker 1: her by mixing the lukewarm water with water from the

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Speaker 1: dispenser to make room temperature water, but.

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Speaker 2: It is futile. She won't relent.

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Speaker 1: She tips the entire bottle of water I mixed out

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Speaker 1: into the sink and tries herself and can't get the

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Speaker 1: temperature right either. She is absolutely raging at me at

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Speaker 1: this point for not listening to her caring.

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Speaker 2: About her needs. She storms out of the half enuff.

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Speaker 2: So am I the a hole here?

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Speaker 1: Or is perhaps this being blown out of proportion and

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Speaker 1: mixing water to a specific temperature is not a big deal?

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Speaker 2: Oh you're both, You're both the problem. I think it

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Speaker 2: is quite a big deal, a huge Damn. I think

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Speaker 2: you're being the right amount of dramatic about it. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: I think this is silly.

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Speaker 3: The solution just just literally don't touch each other's water. Dugs,

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Speaker 3: just don't touch each other's water. Don't touch each other's jugs.

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Speaker 2: People, keep your hands to your drugs, to your own jugs.

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Speaker 1: Yeah it's okay. Wow, this really blew up. Who knew

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Speaker 1: water would be so polarized? It seems like it's super

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Speaker 1: polarizing in your guys itself.

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Speaker 2: Never thought this post would start lukewarm watergate.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, just got off work and reading through all the replies,

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Speaker 1: looks like there's lots of questions, so I'll do my

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Speaker 1: best to answer them and provide some clarity. Thank you

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Speaker 1: everyone for the comments, the stories, the judgments, and everything

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Speaker 1: in between. Appreciate all the inputs so far, and there's

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Speaker 1: been some great takes that I'll take to heart and

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Speaker 1: consider properly, including how best to communicate post watergate with

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Speaker 1: my partner. So more info. Who boiled the kettle and

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Speaker 1: filled the jugs the previous night, who did it, I did?

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Speaker 2: Why did you touch all the water?

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Speaker 1: Firstly, we don't have one jug for her and one

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Speaker 1: for me. We have two jugs for the household, me

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Speaker 1: and her. Okay, no, but this is the problem.

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Speaker 2: I think that's the thing.

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Speaker 1: You can't share jugs. You gotta have your own jugs.

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Speaker 1: No sharing jugs. You have a chug, she has a jug.

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Speaker 2: You don't touch you chug jugs. Leave it out, Okay.

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Speaker 1: I forgot about the water mains being repaired until early

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Speaker 1: this morning. When the trucks showed up and they started working.

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Speaker 1: I rushed down and made sure there was enough water

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Speaker 1: for the both of us, not just me. On top

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Speaker 1: of filling all the jugs and the dispenser and boiling

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Speaker 1: another kettle full of water, I also filled a few sinks.

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Speaker 2: So we'd have extra water to flush the toilet if

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Speaker 2: need be.

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Speaker 1: I honestly thought the water would cool enough by the

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Speaker 1: time she woke up, since it's a cold day.

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Speaker 2: But I guess I was wrong. I didn't expect her

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Speaker 2: to react the way she did.

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Speaker 1: Is she OCD No, she's just pedantic about certain things

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Speaker 1: and needs them to be a specific one.

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Speaker 2: But I don't think it's any.

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Speaker 1: More demanding than any other person who was the n

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Speaker 1: tidy and has certain idio secrecies.

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Speaker 2: Why don't you drink from the tap.

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Speaker 1: Are you Asian? Yes, we are Asian couple. Many of

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Speaker 1: you have guessed that drinking boiled water is cultural and

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Speaker 1: a preference. There is nothing particularly wrong with the tap

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Speaker 1: water in our country, Australia, but it tastes better to

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Speaker 1: my partner after being boiled warm but not boiling water.

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Speaker 1: It tastes different than cooled to room temperature boiled water

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Speaker 1: to her, So it's a preference. I preferred chilled water,

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Speaker 1: but I'd happily drink room temperature water or even warm

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Speaker 1: if there wasn't any chilled water.

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Speaker 3: I mean, they said it was a cultural thing, but

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Speaker 3: I wonder if like a they could get like a

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Speaker 3: water filter or something like a brit or maybe they

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Speaker 3: just like prefer the.

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Speaker 1: Boiled Yeah, I mean it got the jugs, you got

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Speaker 1: the kind of the jugs kind of seems like that's

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Speaker 1: what they're trying to do. But I mean, oh, he's saying, like,

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Speaker 1: you know, he prefers chilled water, but drink other water.

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Speaker 1: So I'm kind of confused why the yeah one is

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Speaker 1: like He's like, no, it has to be pad But

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Speaker 1: then she.

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Speaker 2: Jumped it down the sink too. That's kind of a lot.

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Speaker 2: You just put it into a different jug or so

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Speaker 2: just wait at like a couple of minutes.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, but ice, Cuban, I drink what we have, but

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Speaker 1: preferred to have a chilled It doesn't affect me in

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Speaker 1: any body away.

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Speaker 2: This morning I just filled everything I could, including the dispenser.

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Speaker 2: Why don't you use ice? I can definitely use ice,

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Speaker 2: but our fridge has a built in dispenser.

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Speaker 1: That we have to manually film, so I do that

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Speaker 1: from time to time with water from the jugs. Normally

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Speaker 1: I will only ever use one and leave one for her.

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Speaker 1: This morning, in my haste, I used both as I

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Speaker 1: wanted to make sure everything was full dispenser, both jugs

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Speaker 1: and the kettle. Why don't you have more jugs? It's

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Speaker 1: a question for all of us the.

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Speaker 2: Trust me.

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Speaker 1: This is definitely our next step, as well as the

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Speaker 1: britta water filter.

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Speaker 2: But worried she might not like the taste. Plus she

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Speaker 2: might insist we boil it first before it goes into

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Speaker 2: the britta. Might not work if the britta is like plastic.

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Speaker 2: It's hard plastic.

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Speaker 3: But still yeah, maybe don't put boiling hot water into

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Speaker 3: a britta.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that might be why they have like glass jugs too.

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Speaker 1: That's how the boiling water goes into the gla yeah, yeah, No.

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Speaker 1: Another question, why did you pour half the water into

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Speaker 1: an empty jug and fill both with boiling As previously explained,

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Speaker 1: we shattered a glass jug on a cold day, previously

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Speaker 1: pouring boiling water directly into it because of science, I

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Speaker 1: don't know. Anyways, I was trying to avoid that and

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Speaker 1: thought the boiling and room temperature water would cool sufficiently

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Speaker 1: by the time she woke up. I calculated bro Anyways,

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Speaker 1: I hope that that clarifies most of the questions. We'll

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Speaker 1: post an update once we've reached an amical resolution. My

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Speaker 1: guess is that it's not about the water, as some

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Speaker 1: people have already said, but there's other underlying.

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Speaker 2: Issues, and that this was a trigger.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: I think maybe that's it, because I feel like, you know,

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Speaker 3: sometimes when you're annoyed with people, like it's just like

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Speaker 3: the tiny thing that.

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Speaker 2: Cratch it off. Yeah. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: And I'm sure especially when you're like living with someone, yeah,

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Speaker 1: and it's like you like things a certain way and

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Speaker 1: it usually is a certain way. Yeah, And all of

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Speaker 1: a sudden, I'm like not worried per se about living

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Speaker 1: alone with someone one day, but like.

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Speaker 2: I think I like, I'll need I don't know if

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Speaker 2: I can live in the same room with someone. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: that seems hard. It does seem hard.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, like I need roommates, right, I don't know if

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Speaker 3: I live in the same room, right, because i'd be.

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Speaker 2: Like like got a certain wave.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, thank you for taking an interest and for all

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Speaker 1: the comments, and there is another update. But we have

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Speaker 1: any last thoughts before we get into this. It seems

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Speaker 1: like they have all the solutions. This is such a

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Speaker 1: smallish issue that's kind of being blown out of proportion. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: is that the problems or like the solutions don't seem

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Speaker 1: that hard to find?

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Speaker 2: No, they're pretty easy. Right. Two years on?

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Speaker 1: Wow, two years later, I thought I'd make an update

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Speaker 1: to the original debacle that confused everyone and polarized the community.

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Speaker 1: There was so many comments, some incredibly empathetic and helpful,

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Speaker 1: and some racist and mean, but generally I don't believe

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Speaker 1: that there was ever a consensus reached. Despite all that,

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Speaker 1: I was incredibly grateful to all the comments received by everyone.

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Speaker 2: Whilst I didn't take the time to reply, I actually

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Speaker 2: did read through the mall so on to the update.

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Speaker 1: So some people pointed out our argument was not really

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Speaker 1: about the water. Generally, in every relationship, every person just

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Speaker 1: wants to feel seen, heard, important, understood, and loved. My

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Speaker 1: actions that day did not make her feel that way,

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Speaker 1: and in and of itself, was more indicative of a

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Speaker 1: longer running issue between us and our relationship. For a

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Speaker 1: bit of background, we both have had childhood trauma and

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Speaker 1: at the beginning of our relationship was quite volatile. To

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Speaker 1: find the odds, we stayed together and got married. However,

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Speaker 1: marriage doesn't solve those issues. Over the last two years,

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Speaker 1: we've continued to stay together.

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Speaker 2: Yes we are still married.

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Speaker 1: Like much of the chagrin of those who were advocating

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Speaker 1: our divorce side, that's crazy, people are telling you to

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Speaker 1: divorce over water. It's read it, come on, it's reddish,

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Speaker 1: get ready. And we continued to grow together, believe it

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Speaker 1: or not. The incident involving the water was a bit

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Speaker 1: of a catalyst to us having better conversations regarding how

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Speaker 1: we are going to resolve our own trauma and improve

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Speaker 1: our communication. Long story short, she got therapy, I got therapy.

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Speaker 1: We did some marriage counseling. She got more therapy, I

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Speaker 1: got more therapy, and it's been a journey, but a

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Speaker 1: worthwhile one. When two people really do love each other

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Speaker 1: and want to work it out, they'll find a way too.

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Speaker 2: I'm so genuinely.

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Speaker 1: Grateful for my wife, who she was, who she is now,

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Speaker 1: the strain she has, and the beliefs she had in us,

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Speaker 1: and more so, by the way, we would be genuinely

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Speaker 1: grateful if you joined us live on YouTube every weekday

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Speaker 1: at three PMPs. Just top our profile, top it happened.

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Speaker 1: Seems like everything's perfect in water Land.

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Speaker 2: Good. Let's just jump right in then to the rest

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Speaker 2: of the story.

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Speaker 1: Our communication is better than it's ever pin, our intimacy

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Speaker 1: is stronger than it's ever pin, and we are at

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Speaker 1: such an amazing place.

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Speaker 2: The future looks incredibly bright.

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Speaker 1: It took a lot of work to get here, and

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Speaker 1: there's a lot more work to be done, but we

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Speaker 1: have each other's backs and we will keep going together.

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Speaker 1: Thank you again, Read it and whilse. This update might

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Speaker 1: not be what some of you were hoping for. It

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Speaker 1: is where we are at now, exactly what I was

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Speaker 1: at first. It's just a silly story about water and

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Speaker 1: then it started. I know that I was like, ah,

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Speaker 1: so many relationship problems on Reddit, But wasn't that much

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Speaker 1: for a problem.

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Speaker 2: We're good. Sometimes water is just water. Water is just water.

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Speaker 1: It's a path, like float through the problems and fix

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Speaker 1: them and adapt.

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Speaker 2: Along the way of your relationship. Yeah, sometimes you have

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Speaker 2: to open the chakras. Yes, like gates. Well, that is

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Speaker 2: the end of that story. The story.

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Speaker 1: My arrogant cousin keeps giving me unwanted career advice, so

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Speaker 1: I humiliated her in front of everyone.

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Speaker 2: That'll teach you to keep my mouth shut.

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Speaker 1: And I thirty mail recently earned my PhD from a

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Speaker 1: very prestigious university outside my country. Due to a learning disability,

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Speaker 1: it has been incredibly challenging, to say the least. There

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Speaker 1: were countless nights where I'd be left in tears because

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Speaker 1: I couldn't wrap my head around a chapter or was

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Speaker 1: completely stuck on an assignment, feeling beyond hopeless. But I persevered,

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Speaker 1: and it is such a relief to have achieved this.

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Speaker 1: By the way, this comes from the wind is fickle

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Speaker 1: seven four to two on the r slash Okay storytime sebredded,

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Speaker 1: so I returned home, where my dad proceeded to throw

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Speaker 1: a dinner celebration at home and inviting the entire family

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Speaker 1: to celebrate he is incredibly proud of my achievement and

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Speaker 1: wanted to celebrate it with the whole family. I was

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Speaker 1: looking forward to meeting everyone, but my cousin let's call

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Speaker 1: her Jane fake name. Jade is thirty six, unemployed and

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Speaker 1: lives at home with her parents. She always has to

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Speaker 1: be the center of attention, constantly giving her advice and

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Speaker 1: input on things when nobody wants or asks. My mom

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Speaker 1: and her parents always defend her behavior, which has only

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Speaker 1: made it worse over the years. They claim she's incredibly

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Speaker 1: talented and she needs room to achieve her potential. My

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Speaker 1: dad and I have tried countless times to reason with

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Speaker 1: my mom not to get involved with her, but she

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Speaker 1: is way too stubborn. In our culture, we are expected

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Speaker 1: to play nice with family, no matter how awful they are,

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Speaker 1: so pretty much nobody calls out her behavior. So yeah,

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Speaker 1: while she hasn't ruined family events per se, she definitely

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Speaker 1: leaves a sour note and we can't uninvite her or

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Speaker 1: else the drama will be unbearable.

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Speaker 3: She's like this child genius, and they're like, well, she

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Speaker 3: must work, we must.

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Speaker 2: Work, Yes, exactly.

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Speaker 1: This Grinnet and Barrett mentality has always looked in my

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Speaker 1: home country, and I think it's a big reason why

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Speaker 1: my dad encouraged me to settle abroad. The day of

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Speaker 1: the dinner arrived and Jane was insufferable. As always, She

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Speaker 1: would not stop interrupting conversations and would totally dominate it

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Speaker 1: with her tall tales about how she was getting job

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Speaker 1: offers from Google or going to travel around Europe to

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Speaker 1: pursue her passion in music and art.

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Speaker 2: It was especially annoying because since.

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Speaker 1: She'd keep interrupting me when I was trying to explain

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Speaker 1: my research to my family members who were genuinely curious,

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Speaker 1: and she couldn't stand it. Then Jane decided she finally

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Speaker 1: had to give me advice on what to do with

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Speaker 1: my life now. My mom and aunt basically cornered me,

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Speaker 1: not letting me get away, saying it was important and

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Speaker 1: she was being a good older sister by guiding me.

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Speaker 1: My dad thankfully stayed right next to me in case

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Speaker 1: things escalated. She started going on and on about what

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Speaker 1: she did after graduating high school to make herself a success.

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Speaker 1: My mom and her parents were nodding along, while my

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Speaker 1: dad and the rest of the family looked done with her.

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Speaker 1: I kind of zoned out, not wanting to engage, but

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Speaker 1: she noticed and got annoyed. She snapped her fingers in

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Speaker 1: front of my eyes and looked at me annoyed.

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Speaker 2: I'm giving you such good advice. You should pay attention

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Speaker 2: so you can do well like me, rather than the

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Speaker 2: usual apology or excuse that I'd used for years. I

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Speaker 2: proceeded to reply, is.

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Speaker 1: It good advice to end up an unemployed loser who

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Speaker 1: lives with her parents at thirty six like you? Then? No?

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Speaker 2: Thanks? Ooh my job, Jesus great for good dad. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Everyone was stunned, silent for a second before she proceeded

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Speaker 1: to burst into tears and run out. My aunt and

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Speaker 1: uncle glared at me before racing after her. The dinner

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Speaker 1: pretty much ended after that as everyone made excuses to

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Speaker 1: go off. My mom exploded at me, telling me to apologize,

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Speaker 1: but my dad defended me, saying Jane could stand to

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Speaker 1: learn from me instead of lecturing me like I was

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Speaker 1: a kid. The argument spiraled out of control and things

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00:13:50,160 --> 00:13:53,000
Speaker 1: have been pretty tense since. My aunt and uncle sent

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Speaker 1: some nasty texts, but I ignored her while my mom

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Speaker 1: kept going on about how heartbroken Jane was. My other

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Speaker 1: family members reached out as well, some saying they got

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Speaker 1: where I was coming from but shouldn't have said it

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Speaker 1: so publicly, while others said I'd become arrogant and I

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Speaker 1: should apologize. I'm feeling pretty conflicted about it now. So

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Speaker 1: am I the a whole? And there is an update?

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Speaker 1: But what do you think? I don't think it's the

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Speaker 1: a whole or maybe like justifying a hole because it

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Speaker 1: is pretty awkward to, like, you know, lash out at

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Speaker 1: a sibling when you're in front of everyone, right, Like,

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Speaker 1: I personally probably wouldn't do that, Yeah, just because I'm

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Speaker 1: not like that, you know.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, what's the word like confrontational? Yeah, confrontational, especially with like,

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Speaker 3: you know, fair guests and stuff. Yeah, but that isn't

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Speaker 3: to say that she didn't deserve it, because she was

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Speaker 3: like pushing you and pushing you.

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Speaker 2: Thank you all so much for the comments.

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Speaker 1: Have been going through them, and I want to clarify

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Speaker 1: a few things first. As many of you pointed out, yes,

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Speaker 1: my culture is very hypocritical and toxic, but people are

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Speaker 1: too set in their ways to change. They'd rather tolerate

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Speaker 1: Jane s BS and then call her out for it

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Speaker 1: since it would start drama with her parents and my mom. Second,

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Speaker 1: my mom's always been weirdly protective of Jane, which has

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Speaker 1: been a source of tension between her and my dad.

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Speaker 1: My dad thinks my aunt has emotionally manipulated her into

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Speaker 1: defending Jane, and it's too ingrained into her.

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Speaker 2: We honestly don't know for sure, we just assumed until

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Speaker 2: this point. Now onto the update.

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Speaker 1: Jane has been blowing up on social media, calling me

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Speaker 1: arrogant and saying I have no concept of respect and

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00:15:22,960 --> 00:15:26,560
Speaker 1: the irony is not lost on me. Fortunately, she faced

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Speaker 1: backlash for needlessly airing family drama on the internet and

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Speaker 1: has since taken down her posts. However, the texts from

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Speaker 1: her parents have continued. They're rather entertaining to read. After

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Speaker 1: molling over things, I confronted my mom last night. She

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Speaker 1: gets very obsessive about cleaning when she's upset, so I

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Speaker 1: waited until she was done, and I knew she'd be

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Speaker 1: too tired to keep up her incessant demands. She wasn't

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Speaker 1: really in the mood to talk, but I didn't give

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Speaker 1: her much of a chance to run away. I told

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Speaker 1: her very bluntly how I felt about Jane's behavior, and

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Speaker 1: then I told her that I considered the fact that

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Speaker 1: she was taking Jane's side as a betrayal, and that

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Speaker 1: I thought I could always count on at least my

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Speaker 1: mother to always.

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Speaker 2: Have my back. I admit it's probably a little manipulative.

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Speaker 1: She tried to turn it around to me, saying that

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Speaker 1: I was being disrespectful and it was her job to

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Speaker 1: tell me when I was doing something wrong, except she

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00:16:12,320 --> 00:16:15,680
Speaker 1: wasn't expecting me to respond. Except she wasn't expecting me

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Speaker 1: to respond by asking if she cared so much about Jane,

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Speaker 1: then why has she never bothered doing the same for her. Basically,

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Speaker 1: I think she's saying, like, you're telling me that I'm

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Speaker 1: disrespecting you, and you're calling me out, then why haven't

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Speaker 1: you ever done that with Jane?

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Speaker 2: Like why have you never led her off? If you're

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Speaker 2: telling me that this is what you're supposed to do, Okay, yeah,

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Speaker 2: I get.

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Speaker 1: She had no response, and she proceeded to just walk

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Speaker 1: away and ignore me for the rest of the night.

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Speaker 1: Today morning, she came into my room early in the

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Speaker 1: morning and she apologized to me, saying she should have

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Speaker 1: realized how he was feeling. I know people will say

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Speaker 1: I should have rejected it and put all sorts of conditions,

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Speaker 1: but at the end of the day, she is still

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Speaker 1: my mom. She might have she might have a terrible

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Speaker 1: weak spot when it comes to Jane, but she's always

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Speaker 1: been a great mother to me, and I cannot hate her.

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Speaker 1: If I tried, I forgave her instantly, which made her cry,

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Speaker 1: and she hugged me, saying how proud of me she was,

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Speaker 1: and she was sorry for not showing it. I think

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Speaker 1: my dad must have said something last night that got

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Speaker 1: to her. I decided to push and ask her why

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Speaker 1: she was so defensive of Jane when she had nothing

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Speaker 1: going on for her and.

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00:17:14,160 --> 00:17:16,960
Speaker 2: She was constantly making up lies. She tried to defend

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Speaker 2: her again.

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Speaker 1: But I told her that I was tired of doing

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Speaker 1: the same old routine and if she could please treat

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Speaker 1: me like an adult. After some pushing, she finally admitted

390
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Speaker 1: that she knew Jane had absolutely nothing going on for her,

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Speaker 1: and it was grossly inappropriate for her to try and

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Speaker 1: give me career advice.

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Speaker 2: That's coming out there we go.

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Speaker 1: Her perspective is that Jane is someone to be pitied

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Speaker 1: and we should be compassionate by tolerating her bis so

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Speaker 1: she doesn't feel bad.

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Speaker 2: I pointed out that they just enable her behavior and

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Speaker 2: made it worse. But conveniently now, she said it wasn't

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Speaker 2: her place to rext Jane. It's hypocritical.

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Speaker 1: I was getting kind of sick of this cycle that

401
00:17:54,160 --> 00:17:56,320
Speaker 1: was doomed to repeat, so I told her I wasn't

402
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Speaker 1: apologizing to Jane now or ever, and the next time

403
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Speaker 1: she tried to come to send me, I wouldn't bother

404
00:18:01,280 --> 00:18:03,959
Speaker 1: holding back. I think she was a bit emotionally drained,

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00:18:03,960 --> 00:18:06,520
Speaker 1: so she accepted, so I can just hope that she

406
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Speaker 1: got the message and won't push the subject of Jane anymore.

407
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Speaker 1: So I've been laying in bed thinking about all of this.

408
00:18:12,520 --> 00:18:14,640
Speaker 1: I think pretty much everyone in the family is sick

409
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Speaker 1: of her behavior. So I think I'm going to talk

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00:18:16,520 --> 00:18:18,520
Speaker 1: to my dad about asking the rest of my family

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Speaker 1: to exclude Jane and her parents from future events. I'm

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Speaker 1: not really sure how to approach this, and I doubt

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00:18:23,400 --> 00:18:25,280
Speaker 1: everyone will be on board, but I guess if we

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00:18:25,320 --> 00:18:27,440
Speaker 1: at least get the ball rolling, then people.

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00:18:27,200 --> 00:18:28,520
Speaker 2: Might consider in the future.

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Speaker 1: Kind of sucks that all I can do is hope

417
00:18:30,600 --> 00:18:32,480
Speaker 1: stuff works out instead of knowing for sure.

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Speaker 2: Is another update, though, But what are we thinking just

419
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Speaker 2: because like she is annoying. But the thing is that

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Speaker 2: it seems like so far she's only annoying, right.

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Speaker 3: We all, I feel like we all have an annoying

422
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Speaker 3: person who like, you know, like or family member in

423
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Speaker 3: her life who's like, oh, you should give you unwanted advice, right,

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Speaker 3: And it's like okay, yeah, but like, so far, that's

425
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Speaker 3: kind of all she's done.

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Speaker 1: Right, But there is a second update. This is actually

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Speaker 1: so I don't even know what to make of it.

428
00:19:01,600 --> 00:19:03,840
Speaker 1: I feel like I'm living in a bad sitcom right now.

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Speaker 1: To summarize, in my previous post, I called out my

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Speaker 1: entitle cousin for trying to give me career advice, resulting

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Speaker 1: in her having a mountdown and my parents fighting it out.

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Speaker 2: Things have been kind of frosty since then, but my

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00:19:13,720 --> 00:19:16,120
Speaker 2: mom seems to have gotten the message, which is a relief.

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Speaker 1: She and my dad are talking again, which is a

435
00:19:18,200 --> 00:19:21,159
Speaker 1: relief because the tension was killing me. All I wanted

436
00:19:21,280 --> 00:19:23,399
Speaker 1: was one peaceful month at home before I started my

437
00:19:23,440 --> 00:19:25,359
Speaker 1: new job, but I might not get it with what

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00:19:25,480 --> 00:19:26,600
Speaker 1: transpired last night.

439
00:19:26,640 --> 00:19:28,280
Speaker 2: My mom gets a phone call from my aunt.

440
00:19:28,359 --> 00:19:32,600
Speaker 1: She is hysterical, crying how they've lost everything. She spends

441
00:19:32,640 --> 00:19:35,400
Speaker 1: close to thirty minutes hearing her out, but eventually it's

442
00:19:35,440 --> 00:19:36,439
Speaker 1: too much for her.

443
00:19:36,400 --> 00:19:37,640
Speaker 2: And just ends the call.

444
00:19:37,840 --> 00:19:40,120
Speaker 1: She went into the living room and just sat there,

445
00:19:40,359 --> 00:19:43,840
Speaker 1: practically catatonic. After about ten minutes, she began to tell

446
00:19:43,920 --> 00:19:46,000
Speaker 1: us what was wrong and I can't wrap my head

447
00:19:46,040 --> 00:19:48,440
Speaker 1: around it. Jane decided that the best way for.

448
00:19:48,400 --> 00:19:50,320
Speaker 2: Her to get back at me was to get a

449
00:19:50,359 --> 00:19:52,000
Speaker 2: PhD for herself.

450
00:19:53,760 --> 00:19:56,600
Speaker 3: I'm like, I'm trying to figure out why this would

451
00:19:56,640 --> 00:19:57,960
Speaker 3: make the mom catatonic.

452
00:19:58,560 --> 00:20:00,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, well I really need to no more.

453
00:20:00,600 --> 00:20:03,400
Speaker 1: I mean, maybe there's more, no doubt, she thinks she'll

454
00:20:03,440 --> 00:20:05,600
Speaker 1: breeze by it and be handed to her.

455
00:20:05,480 --> 00:20:06,359
Speaker 2: On a silver patter.

456
00:20:06,440 --> 00:20:09,280
Speaker 1: Her parents, being the enablers there are, were instantly on board.

457
00:20:09,320 --> 00:20:11,399
Speaker 1: The details are a little vague here, but from what

458
00:20:11,400 --> 00:20:15,000
Speaker 1: we could put together, somebody approached them promising they could

459
00:20:15,000 --> 00:20:18,800
Speaker 1: get Jane into a PhD program at Harvard Day. No doubt,

460
00:20:18,880 --> 00:20:21,720
Speaker 1: there were red flags all over, but they dived right

461
00:20:21,760 --> 00:20:24,440
Speaker 1: into it, and the man asked for a hefty sum,

462
00:20:24,600 --> 00:20:25,160
Speaker 1: which was.

463
00:20:25,240 --> 00:20:27,160
Speaker 2: Most of their life savings.

464
00:20:27,480 --> 00:20:32,120
Speaker 1: So they're taking some scammed I'm freaking scared they're paying.

465
00:20:31,800 --> 00:20:34,760
Speaker 3: Someone just to get her into Harvard. It's so funny.

466
00:20:34,880 --> 00:20:37,680
Speaker 3: This guy comes up and he's like, Hello, Yeah.

467
00:20:37,960 --> 00:20:39,840
Speaker 2: Do you want interested in a PhD?

468
00:20:40,160 --> 00:20:43,840
Speaker 3: If you pay me one million dollars, you can go

469
00:20:43,880 --> 00:20:44,560
Speaker 3: to Harvard.

470
00:20:44,800 --> 00:20:48,359
Speaker 2: That's probably on top of like tuition for paying the

471
00:20:49,080 --> 00:20:53,800
Speaker 2: Just send it to money bags one two three, scared right,

472
00:20:53,800 --> 00:20:57,120
Speaker 2: it's on cash app dot Harvard. Oh my gosh.

473
00:20:57,680 --> 00:21:00,520
Speaker 1: I can't imagine Jane being all smug that she'd be

474
00:21:00,600 --> 00:21:03,439
Speaker 1: the best PhD in the family. Her competing with me

475
00:21:03,560 --> 00:21:05,880
Speaker 1: is a mixture of annoying and sad because she has

476
00:21:05,960 --> 00:21:08,320
Speaker 1: no concept of self awareness. I don't know who is

477
00:21:08,359 --> 00:21:11,680
Speaker 1: worse here, Jane or her parents. But foolishly they accepted

478
00:21:11,680 --> 00:21:15,920
Speaker 1: it before the obvious scammer blocked them everywhere and ran

479
00:21:16,080 --> 00:21:17,520
Speaker 1: off with their money.

480
00:21:17,480 --> 00:21:18,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, you guys are known.

481
00:21:18,720 --> 00:21:22,399
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, just to get a status of a

482
00:21:22,440 --> 00:21:24,760
Speaker 1: PhD that you can't even earn for yourself.

483
00:21:24,880 --> 00:21:25,760
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh.

484
00:21:25,880 --> 00:21:28,520
Speaker 1: It just baffles me how easily they fell for it.

485
00:21:28,520 --> 00:21:30,760
Speaker 1: Didn't think even for a moment that it could be

486
00:21:30,880 --> 00:21:33,640
Speaker 1: too good to be true. And these sort of scams

487
00:21:33,680 --> 00:21:36,199
Speaker 1: are incredibly common in my home country, so they have

488
00:21:36,400 --> 00:21:39,399
Speaker 1: no excuse for not knowing better, since it is common sense.

489
00:21:39,440 --> 00:21:42,560
Speaker 1: But I guess expecting even that much from that narcissist

490
00:21:42,680 --> 00:21:44,879
Speaker 1: is too much. You know what else's common sense?

491
00:21:45,119 --> 00:21:48,480
Speaker 2: Joining us live on YouTube every weekday at three PMPSD.

492
00:21:48,600 --> 00:21:51,280
Speaker 1: Just tap our profile, stab it. But I have there's

493
00:21:51,280 --> 00:21:53,720
Speaker 1: a little more. But what do we mein?

494
00:21:53,960 --> 00:21:58,320
Speaker 2: Man? It seems like these people are perhaps not the

495
00:21:58,440 --> 00:22:01,560
Speaker 2: smartest tools. I'm not the sharpest tools in the shed,

496
00:22:01,680 --> 00:22:02,240
Speaker 2: not at all.

497
00:22:02,440 --> 00:22:04,919
Speaker 1: I have no doubt they'll be begging the family for

498
00:22:05,000 --> 00:22:07,440
Speaker 1: money now, and I have a feeling my mom will

499
00:22:07,480 --> 00:22:10,960
Speaker 1: bring up the issue. I'm anticipating more drama, which I'll

500
00:22:10,960 --> 00:22:12,560
Speaker 1: inevitably be dragged into.

501
00:22:12,760 --> 00:22:15,480
Speaker 2: I'm just so exhausted with all of this right now.

502
00:22:15,520 --> 00:22:17,159
Speaker 1: I think I'm just going to ask my parents to

503
00:22:17,240 --> 00:22:18,440
Speaker 1: visit me where I work.

504
00:22:18,240 --> 00:22:20,560
Speaker 2: From now on. The nostalgia visiting home.

505
00:22:20,400 --> 00:22:22,560
Speaker 1: Is great, but it really doesn't seem worth the effort

506
00:22:22,640 --> 00:22:24,919
Speaker 1: dealing with everyone. If any family member I like is

507
00:22:24,920 --> 00:22:27,720
Speaker 1: wanting to visit, I will gladly fund their travel and stay.

508
00:22:27,800 --> 00:22:31,600
Speaker 1: But I can't deal with all the noisiness and judgment anymore.

509
00:22:31,800 --> 00:22:33,560
Speaker 2: It's getting on my last nerve.

510
00:22:33,720 --> 00:22:36,639
Speaker 1: Anyways, I'm going to go sleep this off because my

511
00:22:36,760 --> 00:22:38,280
Speaker 1: head is throbbing.

512
00:22:37,920 --> 00:22:39,960
Speaker 2: Thinking of their idiocy. Little edits.

513
00:22:40,200 --> 00:22:42,800
Speaker 1: For those of you worried about my parents' finances, there's

514
00:22:42,800 --> 00:22:44,880
Speaker 1: no concern because my dad is in control of it.

515
00:22:44,920 --> 00:22:47,400
Speaker 1: My mom has her own debit card for small expenses,

516
00:22:47,440 --> 00:22:50,800
Speaker 1: but any major spending she needs his permission. Might be

517
00:22:50,840 --> 00:22:53,320
Speaker 1: a little backwards, I don't know, but it's avoided a

518
00:22:53,320 --> 00:22:55,200
Speaker 1: lot of problems because my mom is not very good

519
00:22:55,200 --> 00:22:57,919
Speaker 1: with money and tends to funnel any she gets to

520
00:22:58,040 --> 00:22:59,119
Speaker 1: her sister's family.

521
00:22:59,320 --> 00:23:03,080
Speaker 2: Oh ty, tricky, good thing that the dad is in control.

522
00:23:03,200 --> 00:23:07,160
Speaker 2: But yeah, that's the end of that story. Yeah, silly golly.

523
00:23:07,600 --> 00:23:11,720
Speaker 3: It seems like your cousin and her family, which I

524
00:23:11,760 --> 00:23:14,040
Speaker 3: realized I might have called her them your sister.

525
00:23:14,440 --> 00:23:16,160
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think I did that at one point too.

526
00:23:16,280 --> 00:23:17,920
Speaker 1: As I said, someone said, like.

527
00:23:17,960 --> 00:23:19,919
Speaker 2: Just being a bigger sister giving you advice.

528
00:23:20,000 --> 00:23:22,240
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think I confused, But it was your cousin. Yeah,

529
00:23:22,280 --> 00:23:25,040
Speaker 3: it seems like your cousin and your kind of pity them. Honestly,

530
00:23:25,040 --> 00:23:27,560
Speaker 3: it seems like they have a lot going along. They too,

531
00:23:27,680 --> 00:23:29,919
Speaker 3: They both have nothing going on, and they also have

532
00:23:29,960 --> 00:23:31,160
Speaker 3: a lot going on in their lives.

533
00:23:31,240 --> 00:23:33,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's the end of that story. That's the end.

534
00:23:33,840 --> 00:23:36,520
Speaker 2: I keep finding a stranger's clothes in our house.

535
00:23:36,840 --> 00:23:38,960
Speaker 3: I think my wife is cheating on me or just

536
00:23:38,960 --> 00:23:43,159
Speaker 3: playing dress up, dress up. About six months ago, I

537
00:23:43,240 --> 00:23:46,480
Speaker 3: noticed an undershirt folded up in my dresser drawer. The

538
00:23:46,520 --> 00:23:48,600
Speaker 3: weird thing was that the label wasn't from any of

539
00:23:48,640 --> 00:23:51,320
Speaker 3: the brands that I have, and there was only one

540
00:23:51,359 --> 00:23:52,080
Speaker 3: of that kind.

541
00:23:52,280 --> 00:23:54,560
Speaker 2: I tried it on and it clearly didn't fit me.

542
00:23:54,920 --> 00:23:56,680
Speaker 3: I assume that it was an old shirt of mine

543
00:23:56,680 --> 00:23:59,119
Speaker 3: that somehow got brought out of storage and tossed it.

544
00:23:59,200 --> 00:24:02,000
Speaker 3: By the way, this come from throwbro two five six

545
00:24:02,080 --> 00:24:04,280
Speaker 3: on the Okay story time suvered it. So two months

546
00:24:04,359 --> 00:24:07,320
Speaker 3: later I find a pair of men's jeens, clearly not

547
00:24:07,440 --> 00:24:09,960
Speaker 3: my size, folded on the top of the dresser. This

548
00:24:10,080 --> 00:24:12,480
Speaker 3: was after I was at a conference for a few days.

549
00:24:13,320 --> 00:24:15,680
Speaker 3: A conference was in my town, but I was gone

550
00:24:15,720 --> 00:24:18,880
Speaker 3: from six am to eleven pm pretty much every day.

551
00:24:19,359 --> 00:24:21,840
Speaker 3: I asked my wife about it, and family who had

552
00:24:21,920 --> 00:24:25,440
Speaker 3: visited recently. Nobody had any idea where they came from.

553
00:24:25,880 --> 00:24:28,600
Speaker 3: I started to suspect something was up, but decided that

554
00:24:28,600 --> 00:24:30,600
Speaker 3: it would be in the best interest of my relationship

555
00:24:30,680 --> 00:24:33,640
Speaker 3: to just ask once and then trust my wife's response.

556
00:24:33,800 --> 00:24:36,280
Speaker 3: I tossed the jeans and moved on this morning, I

557
00:24:36,359 --> 00:24:39,639
Speaker 3: found a men's polo shirt hanging in my closet, not

558
00:24:39,840 --> 00:24:42,760
Speaker 3: my size, and is a brand from a store that

559
00:24:42,800 --> 00:24:45,200
Speaker 3: I don't shop at and haven't even stepped foot into

560
00:24:45,400 --> 00:24:48,600
Speaker 3: for nearly a decade. This only days after I returned

561
00:24:48,640 --> 00:24:51,800
Speaker 3: from an out of town work trip. I confronted my wife,

562
00:24:52,000 --> 00:24:56,879
Speaker 3: demanding answers. She claims that she knows nothing. Where are

563
00:24:56,920 --> 00:24:59,720
Speaker 3: these shirts coming from? There's just appearing. I started my

564
00:24:59,760 --> 00:25:02,400
Speaker 3: app asking her why she thinks I'm upset. She jumped

565
00:25:02,400 --> 00:25:05,399
Speaker 3: straight to you think I'm cheating. I asked her to

566
00:25:05,400 --> 00:25:07,640
Speaker 3: put herself in my shoes and try to explain how

567
00:25:07,680 --> 00:25:10,760
Speaker 3: else I could interpret this pattern, me being gone, men's

568
00:25:10,760 --> 00:25:13,879
Speaker 3: clothes showing up in my house. She never answered the question.

569
00:25:14,040 --> 00:25:17,240
Speaker 3: We went back and forth, never screaming or throwing things,

570
00:25:17,440 --> 00:25:19,520
Speaker 3: for about an hour, with the shirt lying on the

571
00:25:19,560 --> 00:25:21,919
Speaker 3: table between us. I kept saying that I don't know

572
00:25:22,320 --> 00:25:27,560
Speaker 3: is not an acceptable answer. She ended with or what, yeah,

573
00:25:27,600 --> 00:25:29,159
Speaker 3: what do you need a note? I said that I

574
00:25:29,200 --> 00:25:31,760
Speaker 3: needed answers one more time and got straight up from

575
00:25:31,800 --> 00:25:34,520
Speaker 3: the table and left to go back to work. Historically,

576
00:25:34,600 --> 00:25:36,520
Speaker 3: I do trust her, but I can see how easily

577
00:25:36,600 --> 00:25:38,479
Speaker 3: lies come out of her mouth when speaking to her

578
00:25:38,520 --> 00:25:41,600
Speaker 3: family over seemingly small things. She grew up in an

579
00:25:41,640 --> 00:25:44,320
Speaker 3: overbearing household and she knows how to cover her tracks.

580
00:25:44,560 --> 00:25:47,040
Speaker 3: During the conversation, I asked if I could go through

581
00:25:47,040 --> 00:25:49,919
Speaker 3: her cell phone, something I have never done before or

582
00:25:49,960 --> 00:25:53,080
Speaker 3: even tried to do. Of course, nothing of note. Something

583
00:25:53,359 --> 00:25:57,080
Speaker 3: is happening. The pattern is clear to me. Am I overreacting?

584
00:25:57,440 --> 00:25:58,760
Speaker 3: How should I proceed?

585
00:25:59,040 --> 00:25:59,280
Speaker 2: Edit?

586
00:25:59,680 --> 00:26:02,080
Speaker 3: Thanks for all the inside folks. I've been internalizing all

587
00:26:02,119 --> 00:26:04,240
Speaker 3: of this and trying and remain objective. It's easy to

588
00:26:04,320 --> 00:26:06,920
Speaker 3: jump to a conclusion about cheating, and yes, the evidence

589
00:26:06,920 --> 00:26:11,960
Speaker 3: does seem damning danging. There is some advice in the

590
00:26:11,960 --> 00:26:14,720
Speaker 3: comments about next steps, and many with differing perspectives on

591
00:26:14,760 --> 00:26:17,040
Speaker 3: what else could have happened. This has certainly helped me

592
00:26:17,080 --> 00:26:19,280
Speaker 3: step back and assess the situation more clearly.

593
00:26:19,359 --> 00:26:19,800
Speaker 2: We had a.

594
00:26:19,800 --> 00:26:22,880
Speaker 3: Multiple hour long conversation. She called in my in laws

595
00:26:22,880 --> 00:26:25,639
Speaker 3: about the clothing. I called by folks with the same questions.

596
00:26:25,760 --> 00:26:28,199
Speaker 3: I was given her phone to go through again. I

597
00:26:28,320 --> 00:26:31,240
Speaker 3: even did some digging with ISP to get connected devices

598
00:26:31,280 --> 00:26:34,640
Speaker 3: and website texts from sales, et cetera. No answers anywhere.

599
00:26:34,800 --> 00:26:36,560
Speaker 3: At the end of the day, I chose to not

600
00:26:36,720 --> 00:26:39,200
Speaker 3: blow up my entire life, walk out, lawyer, take the

601
00:26:39,280 --> 00:26:41,879
Speaker 3: kids in, run, and instead chose to proceed with caution.

602
00:26:42,119 --> 00:26:44,359
Speaker 3: If she is cheating, she knows she is going to

603
00:26:44,359 --> 00:26:47,840
Speaker 3: be heavily scrutinized and will eventually be caught without actual evidence.

604
00:26:48,040 --> 00:26:50,600
Speaker 3: If not, I have always destroying my family over nothing.

605
00:26:50,720 --> 00:26:52,840
Speaker 3: Lots of you will disagree with me, I'm sure, but

606
00:26:52,920 --> 00:26:55,160
Speaker 3: this is my life, and there are nuances at play

607
00:26:55,200 --> 00:26:57,920
Speaker 3: here that haven't been and won't be shared, and there

608
00:26:58,119 --> 00:26:58,880
Speaker 3: is an up date.

609
00:26:59,119 --> 00:27:00,679
Speaker 2: What do you think is going on? I don't know.

610
00:27:00,760 --> 00:27:03,040
Speaker 1: I mean, it's just a little suspicious that she's just like,

611
00:27:03,320 --> 00:27:06,159
Speaker 1: I don't know that cloth there, Yeah, it's like someone

612
00:27:06,359 --> 00:27:10,520
Speaker 1: in the house. Yeah, got a ghost. I was putting

613
00:27:10,560 --> 00:27:14,480
Speaker 1: clothes in it's just puttings in there, Like, I don't know.

614
00:27:15,560 --> 00:27:19,600
Speaker 3: I think that I was kind of leaning and like, oh,

615
00:27:19,720 --> 00:27:22,520
Speaker 3: this seems like cheating. But I feel like everyone is

616
00:27:22,560 --> 00:27:26,760
Speaker 3: so bamboozled. It seems right that I'm.

617
00:27:26,600 --> 00:27:29,119
Speaker 1: Like, maybe there is another thing going on, Like everybody's like,

618
00:27:29,240 --> 00:27:32,760
Speaker 1: I don't know, there's someone living in the walls. Yeah,

619
00:27:32,920 --> 00:27:35,760
Speaker 1: also using your dresser, using your closet.

620
00:27:36,960 --> 00:27:39,240
Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't know. It's it's just weird. It's just

621
00:27:39,320 --> 00:27:40,000
Speaker 2: kind of strange.

622
00:27:40,040 --> 00:27:43,200
Speaker 3: Either she's like a pathological liar or something is going

623
00:27:43,240 --> 00:27:45,160
Speaker 3: on something.

624
00:27:45,359 --> 00:27:47,199
Speaker 2: But there is an update. I just kind of want

625
00:27:47,240 --> 00:27:47,439
Speaker 2: to know.

626
00:27:47,680 --> 00:27:50,879
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's but actually, before we do, I think it

627
00:27:50,960 --> 00:27:54,800
Speaker 1: is smart that he wasn't like, let's just divorce, yes,

628
00:27:54,880 --> 00:27:57,680
Speaker 1: because you don't have many stories are like that where

629
00:27:57,680 --> 00:27:58,960
Speaker 1: they're just like okay bye.

630
00:27:59,440 --> 00:28:03,280
Speaker 2: Yeah then but it's like so many more problems. But yeah,

631
00:28:03,320 --> 00:28:05,440
Speaker 2: and I think do they have kids? They have kids.

632
00:28:05,760 --> 00:28:10,160
Speaker 1: They kids, so actually maybe the kids.

633
00:28:09,760 --> 00:28:12,240
Speaker 2: Do we ask the kids about this? Good question?

634
00:28:12,440 --> 00:28:15,600
Speaker 1: Actually, yeah, no, anyone did anyone like stay in your

635
00:28:15,600 --> 00:28:16,280
Speaker 1: house recently?

636
00:28:16,480 --> 00:28:18,359
Speaker 3: Yeah, well they said they talked to the family who

637
00:28:18,400 --> 00:28:21,440
Speaker 3: had stayed. Oh it wasn't that. But yeah, I think

638
00:28:21,480 --> 00:28:24,200
Speaker 3: it's a good idea to just like sus it out first.

639
00:28:24,280 --> 00:28:26,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, give us some time, don't make any rash decisions.

640
00:28:27,320 --> 00:28:28,080
Speaker 2: But there's an update.

641
00:28:28,280 --> 00:28:31,320
Speaker 3: I left off on Tuesday calm, excepting that there had

642
00:28:31,359 --> 00:28:33,440
Speaker 3: to be something more to the story. The last thing

643
00:28:33,480 --> 00:28:35,199
Speaker 3: I wanted to do was blow up my life for

644
00:28:35,240 --> 00:28:38,200
Speaker 3: no reason. Lots about seventy five percent of folks instantly

645
00:28:38,280 --> 00:28:41,320
Speaker 3: jumped to cheating, which is understandable given the context. The

646
00:28:41,360 --> 00:28:43,840
Speaker 3: other twenty five percent either thought it was fake or

647
00:28:43,880 --> 00:28:47,120
Speaker 3: needed more info because the idea of folding slash hanging

648
00:28:47,160 --> 00:28:49,840
Speaker 3: clothes in the closet of the person you're cheating on

649
00:28:50,200 --> 00:28:53,120
Speaker 3: is so Atlantish, which is also understandable. I was committed

650
00:28:53,120 --> 00:28:56,720
Speaker 3: to finding answers that proved my wife citizens, which we

651
00:28:56,800 --> 00:28:57,560
Speaker 3: eventually did.

652
00:28:57,880 --> 00:28:59,640
Speaker 2: Ooh, let's see.

653
00:29:00,320 --> 00:29:03,120
Speaker 3: Out of all the seven point five million views and

654
00:29:03,240 --> 00:29:07,120
Speaker 3: seven k plus comments, the one thing that we all

655
00:29:07,160 --> 00:29:12,040
Speaker 3: missed was the possibility of clothing being donated to us.

656
00:29:12,320 --> 00:29:16,920
Speaker 2: Which ended up being the case what from who? And

657
00:29:16,960 --> 00:29:19,680
Speaker 2: then it ended up in your in yours? That doesn't

658
00:29:19,680 --> 00:29:23,200
Speaker 2: make sense. Also humble brag about all those views.

659
00:29:23,280 --> 00:29:29,120
Speaker 3: Yeah, say seven k million movie views. My wife is

660
00:29:29,160 --> 00:29:34,400
Speaker 3: thrifty and baby clothing is expensive. We're we giving babies

661
00:29:34,520 --> 00:29:37,600
Speaker 3: men's clothing. One of the ways we have curbed the

662
00:29:37,640 --> 00:29:41,240
Speaker 3: cost is by frequenting social media marketplaces looking for those

663
00:29:41,280 --> 00:29:43,960
Speaker 3: who are cleaning house. During the process, it seems that

664
00:29:44,000 --> 00:29:47,160
Speaker 3: folks would include more than just baby clothing in their donations.

665
00:29:47,280 --> 00:29:49,680
Speaker 3: It took some digging, but eventually we found the previous

666
00:29:49,720 --> 00:29:52,400
Speaker 3: owners for both the pants and the polo and confirmed

667
00:29:52,400 --> 00:29:54,080
Speaker 3: that it did indeed come from them.

668
00:29:54,720 --> 00:29:58,000
Speaker 2: Okay, but how did it wind up in your closet? Right?

669
00:29:58,200 --> 00:30:00,360
Speaker 2: Was it? Was it something that was like hung up?

670
00:30:00,560 --> 00:30:03,040
Speaker 2: Because I think it was like hung up or folded.

671
00:30:03,360 --> 00:30:05,760
Speaker 2: Oh something was folded right? Or was it they said

672
00:30:05,840 --> 00:30:06,240
Speaker 2: hung up?

673
00:30:06,280 --> 00:30:08,760
Speaker 1: It said like it's a like folded lash hung up,

674
00:30:09,360 --> 00:30:11,840
Speaker 1: But earlier in the story I thought it was folded

675
00:30:11,880 --> 00:30:12,800
Speaker 1: in the in the dresser.

676
00:30:12,960 --> 00:30:13,600
Speaker 2: This morning I.

677
00:30:13,560 --> 00:30:15,960
Speaker 3: Found a men's poll shirt hanging in my closet, so

678
00:30:16,000 --> 00:30:19,400
Speaker 3: it was both folded and hanging. That still doesn't make

679
00:30:19,440 --> 00:30:21,680
Speaker 3: sense to me, regardless of whether or not it's been donated,

680
00:30:22,120 --> 00:30:23,840
Speaker 3: someone put it in your closet, Like.

681
00:30:23,840 --> 00:30:25,800
Speaker 1: I feel like the only like, the only way that

682
00:30:25,800 --> 00:30:28,800
Speaker 1: that would happen is if the things are getting is

683
00:30:28,840 --> 00:30:30,720
Speaker 1: like pre folded and you just took the stack and

684
00:30:30,720 --> 00:30:32,960
Speaker 1: put it in, or if they're pre hung up or

685
00:30:32,960 --> 00:30:34,479
Speaker 1: you just took the hangers and hung it up.

686
00:30:34,520 --> 00:30:37,040
Speaker 3: But even then, I feel like if my husband was like,

687
00:30:37,280 --> 00:30:40,040
Speaker 3: where did these come from? I would be like, oh, yeah,

688
00:30:40,080 --> 00:30:43,320
Speaker 3: we just recently got about your donations. It was probably that, right,

689
00:30:43,440 --> 00:30:47,520
Speaker 3: Like not, I don't know, you can think anything.

690
00:30:47,520 --> 00:30:50,239
Speaker 2: Right, come on, what is this? Sorry? If you think

691
00:30:50,280 --> 00:30:52,280
Speaker 2: it's fake, maybe it's time you get off the internet.

692
00:30:52,320 --> 00:30:56,560
Speaker 2: That's it. I'm sorry that us he's talking to us.

693
00:30:56,840 --> 00:30:59,600
Speaker 2: I'm not gonna got the internet. That's stupid. That wasn't bad,

694
00:30:59,760 --> 00:31:04,760
Speaker 2: that's n's or anything. I did not prefer innocence. It

695
00:31:04,760 --> 00:31:07,480
Speaker 2: feels like you just took that so easily. That's so easy.

696
00:31:07,680 --> 00:31:09,760
Speaker 3: Now I'm back on maybe she's cheating because how did

697
00:31:09,760 --> 00:31:11,400
Speaker 3: those wind up in the closet and she did not

698
00:31:11,920 --> 00:31:12,480
Speaker 3: stand And.

699
00:31:12,920 --> 00:31:17,959
Speaker 2: What I don't understand this case is not closed. I

700
00:31:18,400 --> 00:31:21,160
Speaker 2: Nancy Drew say that this case is not solved.

701
00:31:21,560 --> 00:31:23,840
Speaker 3: Yeah, put in the comments whether you think that case

702
00:31:23,920 --> 00:31:25,320
Speaker 3: was solid, because personally.

703
00:31:25,880 --> 00:31:28,560
Speaker 2: That's us me. I don't believe, so I don't believe.

704
00:31:28,560 --> 00:31:30,760
Speaker 2: I will stay on the internet, so yeah, you can.

705
00:31:30,920 --> 00:31:33,680
Speaker 2: You can't push me off there. I'll do what I want, right.

706
00:31:33,760 --> 00:31:35,080
Speaker 2: But that's the end of that story.

707
00:31:35,400 --> 00:31:38,840
Speaker 1: My mother accused me of stealing her massage therapist, but.

708
00:31:38,800 --> 00:31:42,120
Speaker 2: I was just trying to be supportive. I can't everyone

709
00:31:42,200 --> 00:31:44,160
Speaker 2: just get a massage, they can share.

710
00:31:44,760 --> 00:31:48,240
Speaker 1: Me thirty female and my mom fifty five female, both

711
00:31:48,400 --> 00:31:50,760
Speaker 1: like to go to the same massage place. There was

712
00:31:50,800 --> 00:31:53,640
Speaker 1: a woman who worked there, Carla, who was our favorite,

713
00:31:53,680 --> 00:31:56,000
Speaker 1: but she recently quit. By the way, this comes from

714
00:31:56,040 --> 00:31:58,840
Speaker 1: Bunny Meow seventy seventy on the Okay Storytime subvered it

715
00:31:58,960 --> 00:32:01,600
Speaker 1: so it's in background. My mom is recently gone part

716
00:32:01,600 --> 00:32:03,959
Speaker 1: time at her job. She's renovated a suite in her

717
00:32:03,960 --> 00:32:06,720
Speaker 1: backyard and turned it into a small home spa that

718
00:32:06,800 --> 00:32:08,280
Speaker 1: she uses to do lashes.

719
00:32:08,440 --> 00:32:10,760
Speaker 3: She works one week on one week off at a

720
00:32:10,840 --> 00:32:13,680
Speaker 3: regular job and does lashes at her home spa on

721
00:32:13,720 --> 00:32:16,680
Speaker 3: her week off. We were both sad that Carla had

722
00:32:16,760 --> 00:32:18,760
Speaker 3: left the massage place, as she was the best and

723
00:32:18,840 --> 00:32:21,960
Speaker 3: we didn't know where she had gone. Otherwise we would

724
00:32:22,000 --> 00:32:24,360
Speaker 3: have followed, but we think they have a contract that

725
00:32:24,400 --> 00:32:27,320
Speaker 3: doesn't allow providers to take clients with them when they leave,

726
00:32:27,480 --> 00:32:30,080
Speaker 3: as this has happened before. I suggested to my mom

727
00:32:30,160 --> 00:32:32,480
Speaker 3: that she should look her up on socials. Maybe she

728
00:32:32,520 --> 00:32:35,200
Speaker 3: had a massage place, maybe she had a massage page,

729
00:32:35,320 --> 00:32:35,880
Speaker 3: or we could.

730
00:32:35,800 --> 00:32:36,960
Speaker 2: Find out where she had moved to.

731
00:32:37,120 --> 00:32:39,600
Speaker 3: My mom found her on Socials and Carla said she

732
00:32:39,720 --> 00:32:41,760
Speaker 3: was taking a break and wasn't sure what her next

733
00:32:41,800 --> 00:32:44,000
Speaker 3: steps were, but she did offer to do a house

734
00:32:44,080 --> 00:32:46,680
Speaker 3: visit for my mom, but said her portable massage table

735
00:32:46,760 --> 00:32:48,480
Speaker 3: was in storage and she would have to sort out

736
00:32:48,520 --> 00:32:50,840
Speaker 3: getting that. My mom said no problem. She had the

737
00:32:50,840 --> 00:32:52,560
Speaker 3: spa on the back that has a table and they

738
00:32:52,560 --> 00:32:54,720
Speaker 3: could use that. Carla thought that was great. When they

739
00:32:54,840 --> 00:32:57,000
Speaker 3: arranged a time, my mom called me and said that

740
00:32:57,000 --> 00:32:59,400
Speaker 3: Carla was coming to her spa to do massages and

741
00:32:59,440 --> 00:33:01,280
Speaker 3: asked me if I wanted her to check and see

742
00:33:01,280 --> 00:33:03,360
Speaker 3: if she would also do massage for me. After I

743
00:33:03,400 --> 00:33:06,520
Speaker 3: said yes, that would be great. She's the best, my

744
00:33:06,600 --> 00:33:08,760
Speaker 3: mom mentioned that since Carla didn't have a space to

745
00:33:08,800 --> 00:33:11,280
Speaker 3: work from right now, she was thinking about offering Carla

746
00:33:11,360 --> 00:33:13,120
Speaker 3: to rent this spaw in the week my mom is

747
00:33:13,160 --> 00:33:15,840
Speaker 3: at work. She thought it could be mutually beneficial arrangement.

748
00:33:15,880 --> 00:33:17,560
Speaker 3: I said that was nice and didn't really think much

749
00:33:17,560 --> 00:33:19,800
Speaker 3: about it. When I got my massage, I chatted with

750
00:33:19,840 --> 00:33:22,200
Speaker 3: Carla a bit about why she left the previous place

751
00:33:22,280 --> 00:33:24,280
Speaker 3: and if she had any plans to go somewhere new.

752
00:33:24,320 --> 00:33:25,920
Speaker 3: She said to me that she was thinking of starting

753
00:33:26,000 --> 00:33:29,400
Speaker 3: her own business and going to clients' houses to do massages.

754
00:33:29,480 --> 00:33:31,240
Speaker 3: She told me that's what she used to do and

755
00:33:31,280 --> 00:33:33,920
Speaker 3: that she had a portable massage table. She didn't bring

756
00:33:34,000 --> 00:33:36,400
Speaker 3: up working for my mom's spa. I did not either.

757
00:33:36,440 --> 00:33:38,000
Speaker 3: I wasn't sure if my mom had talked to her

758
00:33:38,000 --> 00:33:40,440
Speaker 3: about it or anything, but figure that was between.

759
00:33:40,200 --> 00:33:42,480
Speaker 2: Them and not really any of my business, which is fair.

760
00:33:42,560 --> 00:33:44,520
Speaker 3: I don't know if I would have brought that up

761
00:33:44,680 --> 00:33:48,000
Speaker 3: right that sounds about. After the massage, I talked to

762
00:33:48,040 --> 00:33:49,920
Speaker 3: my mom a bit and she said she had mentioned

763
00:33:49,920 --> 00:33:51,640
Speaker 3: to Carla that she could rent the spaw in the

764
00:33:51,680 --> 00:33:53,720
Speaker 3: week my mom was at work, but that Carla hadn't

765
00:33:53,720 --> 00:33:55,680
Speaker 3: really said yes or no, and they didn't get into it.

766
00:33:55,720 --> 00:33:57,520
Speaker 3: I said to my mom that Carla had talked about

767
00:33:57,560 --> 00:34:00,440
Speaker 3: maybe starting her own business and going to people's house houses,

768
00:34:00,560 --> 00:34:02,600
Speaker 3: and that she had not mentioned renting the room, but

769
00:34:02,640 --> 00:34:05,200
Speaker 3: the conversation had been very casual and more about what

770
00:34:05,240 --> 00:34:07,600
Speaker 3: her thoughts were when she left the previous place and

771
00:34:07,640 --> 00:34:09,520
Speaker 3: why she had left there. I said she should talk

772
00:34:09,560 --> 00:34:11,719
Speaker 3: to Carla about renting the room if she really wanted to,

773
00:34:11,880 --> 00:34:13,840
Speaker 3: and I asked her about what kind of arrangement she

774
00:34:13,880 --> 00:34:16,680
Speaker 3: would be looking for. It was all a hypothetical conversation,

775
00:34:16,920 --> 00:34:19,759
Speaker 3: as obviously Carla had not said yes or no. I

776
00:34:19,840 --> 00:34:21,920
Speaker 3: was just curious to know what my mom was hoping

777
00:34:21,960 --> 00:34:25,680
Speaker 3: for slash her ideal situation. My mom seemed somewhat upset

778
00:34:25,719 --> 00:34:27,960
Speaker 3: by this conversation, but I thought she was just being a.

779
00:34:27,920 --> 00:34:28,920
Speaker 2: Little weird and let it go.

780
00:34:29,120 --> 00:34:31,640
Speaker 3: Later that night, I texted my mom and asked her

781
00:34:31,640 --> 00:34:34,000
Speaker 3: for Carla's contact info. My mom had been the one

782
00:34:34,000 --> 00:34:36,239
Speaker 3: to message her, and Carla had given her number to

783
00:34:36,280 --> 00:34:38,040
Speaker 3: my mom and said I could grab it from her

784
00:34:38,120 --> 00:34:41,840
Speaker 3: so we could stay in contact. My mom was very upset.

785
00:34:42,160 --> 00:34:44,440
Speaker 3: She said that she's offended that I would go behind

786
00:34:44,480 --> 00:34:46,480
Speaker 3: her back and tried to steal Carla.

787
00:34:47,040 --> 00:34:52,399
Speaker 1: What what she's literally like, she's like a worker, She's

788
00:34:52,400 --> 00:34:55,560
Speaker 1: like she's providing a service, She's got clients.

789
00:34:55,800 --> 00:34:58,520
Speaker 3: Like this is so weird. I told her I had

790
00:34:58,640 --> 00:35:00,640
Speaker 3: no idea what she was talking about. She says that

791
00:35:00,719 --> 00:35:02,879
Speaker 3: she spent a lot of money rather fading her SPA

792
00:35:03,080 --> 00:35:05,200
Speaker 3: and that partnering with Carla could have been really good

793
00:35:05,239 --> 00:35:07,680
Speaker 3: business opportunity for her. And then I'm just scooping her

794
00:35:07,760 --> 00:35:09,080
Speaker 3: up and going to get her to come to my

795
00:35:09,160 --> 00:35:11,840
Speaker 3: house for massage. She said, she made her intentions clear

796
00:35:11,880 --> 00:35:14,120
Speaker 3: to me, and then I'm trying to undermine her plans

797
00:35:14,160 --> 00:35:16,920
Speaker 3: by staying in contact with Carla. But like if Carla,

798
00:35:17,239 --> 00:35:19,879
Speaker 3: if Carla wanted to work from your house, she would

799
00:35:19,960 --> 00:35:21,560
Speaker 3: have This has nothing to do with it.

800
00:35:21,680 --> 00:35:24,760
Speaker 1: Yeah, like this is you didn't talk to her about

801
00:35:24,760 --> 00:35:26,840
Speaker 1: what her plans were for her own business.

802
00:35:26,880 --> 00:35:29,040
Speaker 3: This came as a total surprise to me. I thought

803
00:35:29,040 --> 00:35:31,000
Speaker 3: that she was trying to be nice making the offer

804
00:35:31,080 --> 00:35:33,160
Speaker 3: to Carla, and that if it worked out, that was great.

805
00:35:33,280 --> 00:35:35,719
Speaker 3: I had no idea that she would be upset if

806
00:35:35,719 --> 00:35:38,480
Speaker 3: I followed Carla to another spa or hired her if

807
00:35:38,520 --> 00:35:41,000
Speaker 3: she decided she would rather do mobile massage. She said

808
00:35:41,040 --> 00:35:43,560
Speaker 3: that she's offended and that if I want Carla's numbers

809
00:35:43,680 --> 00:35:46,840
Speaker 3: so bad, I can track her down on socials myself,

810
00:35:46,920 --> 00:35:48,360
Speaker 3: and that she won't give it to me.

811
00:35:48,480 --> 00:35:50,560
Speaker 2: Oh my god, So she's being so childish.

812
00:35:50,640 --> 00:35:54,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, she's like, I really didn't like my spa thing

813
00:35:55,000 --> 00:35:59,120
Speaker 3: was not going to work out without Carla's help, right, Yeah,

814
00:35:59,239 --> 00:35:59,960
Speaker 3: you gotta figured out.

815
00:36:00,360 --> 00:36:02,480
Speaker 2: I told her she was being crazy and I had

816
00:36:02,520 --> 00:36:04,640
Speaker 2: no idea where any of this was coming from.

817
00:36:04,680 --> 00:36:07,360
Speaker 3: She thinks it is completely inappropriate for me and Carla

818
00:36:07,440 --> 00:36:10,200
Speaker 3: to have even talked about Carla doing mobile massage. She

819
00:36:10,200 --> 00:36:12,839
Speaker 3: had already offered her spot at carla My mom views,

820
00:36:12,920 --> 00:36:14,920
Speaker 3: asking me if I wanted to come get a massage

821
00:36:15,160 --> 00:36:18,279
Speaker 3: as getting Carla another client, and thinks it's shady of

822
00:36:18,360 --> 00:36:20,960
Speaker 3: Carla to try to pick me up as a client

823
00:36:21,040 --> 00:36:23,440
Speaker 3: when my mom was clearly trying to make an arrangement

824
00:36:23,480 --> 00:36:28,080
Speaker 3: with her. Uh, this is exhausting. I think the whole

825
00:36:28,080 --> 00:36:30,080
Speaker 3: thing is kind of gross, and that she's acting like

826
00:36:30,160 --> 00:36:32,520
Speaker 3: she is control over Carla's choice, or at least that

827
00:36:32,560 --> 00:36:34,480
Speaker 3: I should only be able to see Carla if she

828
00:36:34,560 --> 00:36:37,439
Speaker 3: decides to work from her SPA because she's the one

829
00:36:37,480 --> 00:36:39,960
Speaker 3: that reached out and found her on socials. The whole

830
00:36:39,960 --> 00:36:42,919
Speaker 3: thing just seems bizarre to me. But you know what's

831
00:36:42,920 --> 00:36:45,840
Speaker 3: not bizarre? Joining us live every weekday at three pm

832
00:36:45,880 --> 00:36:48,200
Speaker 3: on YouTube. Just tap her profile, just tappen.

833
00:36:48,080 --> 00:36:49,520
Speaker 2: And there is a little bit left. But what do

834
00:36:49,600 --> 00:36:52,680
Speaker 2: you think? Because this is so strange, so crazy.

835
00:36:52,719 --> 00:36:55,279
Speaker 1: I feel like this sounds like the stories you'll hear

836
00:36:55,320 --> 00:36:58,120
Speaker 1: about like talent agencies. Yeah, like there's like an actress

837
00:36:58,160 --> 00:37:01,120
Speaker 1: like that, and they're like like, great, you are my manager, right,

838
00:37:01,200 --> 00:37:04,160
Speaker 1: And then they're like they're trying to get other clients

839
00:37:04,160 --> 00:37:05,160
Speaker 1: because that's their job.

840
00:37:05,440 --> 00:37:07,440
Speaker 2: And then they're like, what, you're getting jobs for them

841
00:37:07,480 --> 00:37:08,000
Speaker 2: and not with me.

842
00:37:08,760 --> 00:37:12,000
Speaker 1: You don't only work with me, That's I'm not your

843
00:37:12,040 --> 00:37:13,040
Speaker 1: whole life, right.

844
00:37:13,080 --> 00:37:15,480
Speaker 2: It's like, girl, this is their job. They've got got

845
00:37:15,560 --> 00:37:17,920
Speaker 2: other things going on. It's like, you're not this is

846
00:37:18,000 --> 00:37:20,720
Speaker 2: just what it is. I don't know what to tell you. Yeah,

847
00:37:20,760 --> 00:37:24,440
Speaker 2: that's just that's insane. Let Carla be yes.

848
00:37:24,719 --> 00:37:26,480
Speaker 3: In the end, I said, I don't want to be

849
00:37:26,520 --> 00:37:28,680
Speaker 3: involved in any of this, and then I will just

850
00:37:28,719 --> 00:37:31,200
Speaker 3: go back to the massage place and see another provider.

851
00:37:31,360 --> 00:37:34,560
Speaker 2: So am I the a olier? I did call her crazy.

852
00:37:34,320 --> 00:37:36,319
Speaker 3: That was probably kind of mean. But for the rest

853
00:37:36,360 --> 00:37:38,759
Speaker 3: of it, did I undermine her business plan? Am I

854
00:37:38,800 --> 00:37:42,240
Speaker 3: being disloyal? I really didn't consider my mom's business plans

855
00:37:42,239 --> 00:37:44,439
Speaker 3: as a factor in this at all. Carla just gives

856
00:37:44,480 --> 00:37:46,600
Speaker 3: the best massage and I would have been happy to

857
00:37:46,640 --> 00:37:49,040
Speaker 3: follow her wherever she takes her career. And that is

858
00:37:49,080 --> 00:37:51,960
Speaker 3: the end of that story. Just go go after go

859
00:37:52,040 --> 00:37:54,759
Speaker 3: get your massage, op. Yeah, don't let your mom stop you.

860
00:37:55,040 --> 00:37:57,720
Speaker 1: Yeah. But also I'm thinking too, Like you know, OPI

861
00:37:57,840 --> 00:38:00,439
Speaker 1: was originally gonna get Carla to like come to her house,

862
00:38:00,560 --> 00:38:01,359
Speaker 1: ye massage there.

863
00:38:01,480 --> 00:38:04,560
Speaker 2: Why can't like you could still get a massage from Carla?

864
00:38:04,760 --> 00:38:07,960
Speaker 1: Like, well, I think it's this, yeah, like if the

865
00:38:08,040 --> 00:38:10,200
Speaker 1: mom has like such problem with it, then it's like, okay,

866
00:38:10,280 --> 00:38:12,240
Speaker 1: well I'll just go to your house.

867
00:38:12,280 --> 00:38:14,840
Speaker 2: Then like what.

868
00:38:15,040 --> 00:38:17,880
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think it's the thing of the mom wanted

869
00:38:17,920 --> 00:38:21,240
Speaker 3: her like Carla to be a part of her business.

870
00:38:21,400 --> 00:38:23,439
Speaker 3: And so it's not even like she she's like, it's

871
00:38:23,480 --> 00:38:25,799
Speaker 3: not that she wants a massage from Carla. She wants

872
00:38:25,840 --> 00:38:28,400
Speaker 3: Carla to help out her business. She doesn't think that

873
00:38:28,440 --> 00:38:30,480
Speaker 3: she can do it on her own. So like, you

874
00:38:30,520 --> 00:38:33,560
Speaker 3: don't have DIBs on Carla. Carla is doing whatever she wants.

875
00:38:33,320 --> 00:38:35,399
Speaker 1: To do, right, And then it's like weird too because

876
00:38:35,400 --> 00:38:37,480
Speaker 1: it's like, well, she was going to use her like

877
00:38:37,480 --> 00:38:40,000
Speaker 1: massage table, Yeah, you already had a spa, so like

878
00:38:40,480 --> 00:38:42,600
Speaker 1: that's the only reason that she was over there in

879
00:38:42,640 --> 00:38:43,240
Speaker 1: the first place.

880
00:38:43,520 --> 00:38:47,560
Speaker 3: So so silly, so so silly, my goodness.

881
00:38:47,560 --> 00:38:49,879
Speaker 2: But uh no, not the Ahle No, for sure, not

882
00:38:49,960 --> 00:38:50,440
Speaker 2: the ale.

883
00:38:51,080 --> 00:38:55,200
Speaker 1: My manipulative niece has been disrespectful for years.

884
00:38:55,520 --> 00:39:01,400
Speaker 2: I refuse to reconcile with her. Don't reconcile to bodest respect.

885
00:39:01,680 --> 00:39:04,080
Speaker 2: Before I dive into this situation, I would like to

886
00:39:04,120 --> 00:39:06,799
Speaker 2: inform you all about my culture. I am Mong It's

887
00:39:06,800 --> 00:39:09,920
Speaker 2: out the Eastern Asian sub ethnic group, and we highly

888
00:39:10,080 --> 00:39:12,600
Speaker 2: valued the phrase blood is thicker than water. Thus this

889
00:39:12,719 --> 00:39:15,919
Speaker 2: situation makes me question about myself a lot. By the way,

890
00:39:16,000 --> 00:39:19,640
Speaker 2: this comes from Salamander nine to one on the r

891
00:39:19,719 --> 00:39:21,440
Speaker 2: slash Okay story time and subreddit.

892
00:39:21,600 --> 00:39:24,560
Speaker 1: So, I twenty one female, used to be best friends

893
00:39:24,560 --> 00:39:27,200
Speaker 1: with my niece twenty one female about two years ago.

894
00:39:27,480 --> 00:39:30,440
Speaker 1: We used to do everything together and at a certain

895
00:39:30,480 --> 00:39:32,799
Speaker 1: point I looked up to her, being that she was

896
00:39:32,840 --> 00:39:35,360
Speaker 1: eight months older than me. However, it wasn't until we

897
00:39:35,400 --> 00:39:38,120
Speaker 1: hit puberty where I started to notice how different our

898
00:39:38,160 --> 00:39:40,840
Speaker 1: morals were. Growing up in a very traditional household, my

899
00:39:40,880 --> 00:39:43,799
Speaker 1: parents restricted me from doing many things and has set

900
00:39:43,880 --> 00:39:46,600
Speaker 1: high expectations and responsibilities for me. In a way, it

901
00:39:46,680 --> 00:39:48,799
Speaker 1: caused me to become a people pleaser and did not

902
00:39:48,880 --> 00:39:52,080
Speaker 1: speak up whenever something bothered me. During our middle school years,

903
00:39:52,080 --> 00:39:55,000
Speaker 1: she would constantly make me message boys for her. At

904
00:39:55,000 --> 00:39:57,120
Speaker 1: a certain point, it felt like I was dating them,

905
00:39:57,239 --> 00:39:59,959
Speaker 1: which is weird, and it got mentally draining.

906
00:39:59,640 --> 00:40:01,879
Speaker 2: To try trying to build relationships for her.

907
00:40:02,000 --> 00:40:04,479
Speaker 1: Not to mention I was a tomboy and was only

908
00:40:04,520 --> 00:40:07,080
Speaker 1: concerned about improving my school work at the time. Although

909
00:40:07,120 --> 00:40:09,120
Speaker 1: I was fed up with it, I continued to help

910
00:40:09,160 --> 00:40:11,440
Speaker 1: her because I saw how much love she had for

911
00:40:11,480 --> 00:40:13,080
Speaker 1: those boys, and I was too.

912
00:40:13,040 --> 00:40:13,719
Speaker 2: Nice to say no.

913
00:40:14,120 --> 00:40:16,520
Speaker 1: We would have sleepovers once a week because she didn't

914
00:40:16,520 --> 00:40:18,799
Speaker 1: want to help out at her own home. Whenever she

915
00:40:18,880 --> 00:40:21,080
Speaker 1: came over, she would always be in my room sleeping

916
00:40:21,120 --> 00:40:23,279
Speaker 1: and talking on the phone with boys. If I had

917
00:40:23,360 --> 00:40:25,279
Speaker 1: multiple chores to do and asked her to help with

918
00:40:25,320 --> 00:40:28,880
Speaker 1: the littlest thing, she would complain and sleep instead. This

919
00:40:28,920 --> 00:40:31,759
Speaker 1: cycle continued on until we got into high school. We

920
00:40:31,800 --> 00:40:34,200
Speaker 1: got into our first major break in our freshman year

921
00:40:34,200 --> 00:40:36,840
Speaker 1: of high school. She said something very hurtful to me

922
00:40:36,920 --> 00:40:39,920
Speaker 1: and only decided to apologize because a boy.

923
00:40:39,760 --> 00:40:40,480
Speaker 2: Convinced her to.

924
00:40:40,800 --> 00:40:43,839
Speaker 1: It made me feel like her apology was insincere and

925
00:40:43,920 --> 00:40:46,320
Speaker 1: she only did that to impress a boy.

926
00:40:46,400 --> 00:40:48,560
Speaker 2: Absolutely that yeah, reason, I think you're right.

927
00:40:49,000 --> 00:40:52,680
Speaker 1: Thus, this led us not to communicate for six months

928
00:40:52,760 --> 00:40:55,880
Speaker 1: until she apologized because, as she claimed, she could not

929
00:40:56,040 --> 00:40:58,560
Speaker 1: find anyone to replace me. Time goes by, and the

930
00:40:58,600 --> 00:41:01,600
Speaker 1: cycle continues in high school, where she constantly needs help,

931
00:41:01,600 --> 00:41:04,080
Speaker 1: trying to get boys attention and asking for my help,

932
00:41:04,160 --> 00:41:06,640
Speaker 1: but can never be there for me when I needed her.

933
00:41:06,760 --> 00:41:09,160
Speaker 1: During this time, I introduced many of my friends to her,

934
00:41:09,200 --> 00:41:11,120
Speaker 1: and she got close to them really quick because she's

935
00:41:11,239 --> 00:41:14,520
Speaker 1: extremely extroverted. It wasn't until I got my first personal

936
00:41:14,520 --> 00:41:18,360
Speaker 1: interactions with boys that things took a slight turn. Whenever

937
00:41:18,400 --> 00:41:20,600
Speaker 1: things go downhill with me and a boy, she would

938
00:41:20,640 --> 00:41:23,479
Speaker 1: ask for their personal information for me, as if she's

939
00:41:23,520 --> 00:41:25,480
Speaker 1: been waiting for them to be done with me.

940
00:41:25,640 --> 00:41:27,719
Speaker 2: She's like, give me the inside scoop. I'm going in

941
00:41:28,640 --> 00:41:29,600
Speaker 2: right right.

942
00:41:30,400 --> 00:41:32,680
Speaker 1: Of course, I didn't mind sharing the information with her,

943
00:41:32,760 --> 00:41:34,799
Speaker 1: but what threw me off was how quick she asked

944
00:41:34,880 --> 00:41:37,440
Speaker 1: me and for breaking the girl code not talking to

945
00:41:37,520 --> 00:41:40,080
Speaker 1: each other's old fling. She not only did this to me,

946
00:41:40,280 --> 00:41:42,520
Speaker 1: but to all our friends as well. During the COVID

947
00:41:42,600 --> 00:41:45,200
Speaker 1: nineteen pandemic, things were really hard for my friends and I.

948
00:41:45,320 --> 00:41:46,240
Speaker 2: Our mental health.

949
00:41:46,000 --> 00:41:48,799
Speaker 1: Were extremely low, and I remember we cried a lot

950
00:41:48,840 --> 00:41:51,319
Speaker 1: together as we discussed our thoughts. But there would be

951
00:41:51,360 --> 00:41:54,240
Speaker 1: times when my niece made funny jokes out of nowhere,

952
00:41:54,400 --> 00:41:57,080
Speaker 1: asked us to play games with her because she was bored,

953
00:41:57,280 --> 00:42:00,080
Speaker 1: demanded us to help her get a boy's attention. We

954
00:42:00,120 --> 00:42:03,880
Speaker 1: each needed our own personal space and made unnecessary comments

955
00:42:03,880 --> 00:42:06,520
Speaker 1: that made us sad or uncomfortable. If we weren't giving

956
00:42:06,600 --> 00:42:09,399
Speaker 1: her any attention, she would find random boys and hook

957
00:42:09,480 --> 00:42:12,040
Speaker 1: up with them for fun. Her addiction to boys were

958
00:42:12,200 --> 00:42:15,160
Speaker 1: really bad that she was constantly getting BV and not

959
00:42:15,320 --> 00:42:18,239
Speaker 1: seeking medical help, even when we found the resources for

960
00:42:18,280 --> 00:42:21,760
Speaker 1: her nice other than boys, We encouraged her to spend

961
00:42:21,800 --> 00:42:24,080
Speaker 1: more energy into doing well in school because she was

962
00:42:24,080 --> 00:42:25,200
Speaker 1: skipping classes and not.

963
00:42:25,239 --> 00:42:26,200
Speaker 2: Doing her assignments.

964
00:42:26,280 --> 00:42:28,959
Speaker 1: It got really bad, to the point where she may

965
00:42:29,000 --> 00:42:32,160
Speaker 1: not graduate. Hence, my friends and I did all her

966
00:42:32,200 --> 00:42:34,600
Speaker 1: assignments for her, too nice.

967
00:42:34,760 --> 00:42:37,279
Speaker 2: Yeah, what don't do that? You're too nice? You're like

968
00:42:37,440 --> 00:42:39,600
Speaker 2: tech getting boys for her. Are you doing your homework?

969
00:42:39,840 --> 00:42:42,319
Speaker 2: Like is she doing yeah? Are you brushing her teeth

970
00:42:42,360 --> 00:42:44,399
Speaker 2: for her too? Or like what's going on? Come on?

971
00:42:44,960 --> 00:42:47,040
Speaker 1: We did all her assignments for her, just for her

972
00:42:47,080 --> 00:42:50,239
Speaker 1: to actually not graduate because she didn't want to do

973
00:42:50,320 --> 00:42:52,000
Speaker 1: the extra curriculum she had to do.

974
00:42:52,160 --> 00:42:52,880
Speaker 2: My patients for my.

975
00:42:52,920 --> 00:42:55,360
Speaker 1: Knees finally ran out in my senior year of high school.

976
00:42:55,400 --> 00:42:57,800
Speaker 1: At this time, I met my current boyfriend, as.

977
00:42:57,680 --> 00:42:59,200
Speaker 2: He is the first boy E ever dated.

978
00:42:59,280 --> 00:43:01,560
Speaker 1: When he and I we hung out and talked a

979
00:43:01,600 --> 00:43:04,560
Speaker 1: lot on the phone, as any couple would. Certainly, I

980
00:43:04,719 --> 00:43:07,040
Speaker 1: was giving all my friends less attention so I can

981
00:43:07,080 --> 00:43:09,440
Speaker 1: get to know this boy. My niece especially felt very

982
00:43:09,480 --> 00:43:11,719
Speaker 1: hurt about getting less attention and started to give me

983
00:43:11,800 --> 00:43:14,080
Speaker 1: the cold shoulder and would act weird.

984
00:43:13,800 --> 00:43:16,520
Speaker 2: Whenever I was around. The summer after graduating.

985
00:43:16,200 --> 00:43:18,520
Speaker 1: High school, I attended a friend's birthday party with my

986
00:43:18,640 --> 00:43:21,600
Speaker 1: niece because we were all very close friends. At the party,

987
00:43:21,719 --> 00:43:23,920
Speaker 1: my boyfriend came to pick me up, and while my

988
00:43:23,960 --> 00:43:27,120
Speaker 1: attention was somewhere else, my niece came and slapped my

989
00:43:27,200 --> 00:43:29,960
Speaker 1: boyfriend's back with a lot of horse girl.

990
00:43:30,280 --> 00:43:32,360
Speaker 2: Stop, that's so annoying. Stop.

991
00:43:32,480 --> 00:43:34,719
Speaker 1: Till this day, my boyfriend said that that slop was

992
00:43:35,000 --> 00:43:38,200
Speaker 1: very painful and that I've never hit him like that other.

993
00:43:38,239 --> 00:43:40,480
Speaker 2: Than my boyfriend. She also did that to my friend's

994
00:43:40,560 --> 00:43:43,279
Speaker 2: boyfriends and yelled in their faces that night, what is

995
00:43:43,320 --> 00:43:45,000
Speaker 2: this girl doing? What is going on?

996
00:43:45,360 --> 00:43:48,480
Speaker 1: My boyfriend felt uncomfortable, and so we left the party.

997
00:43:48,600 --> 00:43:51,480
Speaker 1: After we left, she called my other friend and frantically

998
00:43:51,520 --> 00:43:55,360
Speaker 1: apologized because she thought I left because I was jealous

999
00:43:55,480 --> 00:43:57,480
Speaker 1: and tried to defend her actions.

1000
00:43:57,600 --> 00:43:59,320
Speaker 2: At first, I did not think much.

1001
00:43:59,160 --> 00:44:02,280
Speaker 1: Of the situation until days go by and my niece

1002
00:44:02,320 --> 00:44:03,440
Speaker 1: called me non stop.

1003
00:44:03,480 --> 00:44:05,839
Speaker 2: At two am. It took her to call me four

1004
00:44:05,840 --> 00:44:08,319
Speaker 2: times for me to finally pick up. I was on the.

1005
00:44:08,239 --> 00:44:11,200
Speaker 1: Phone with my boyfriend and she called him lectured him

1006
00:44:11,239 --> 00:44:13,560
Speaker 1: to stop taking up my time and for me to

1007
00:44:13,560 --> 00:44:16,120
Speaker 1: pick up her calls. I initially did not want to

1008
00:44:16,160 --> 00:44:18,960
Speaker 1: answer her calls because prior to this, for a week straight,

1009
00:44:19,280 --> 00:44:21,560
Speaker 1: she would only contact me to play games with her,

1010
00:44:21,719 --> 00:44:24,319
Speaker 1: as I predicted. When I answered her call, she asked

1011
00:44:24,360 --> 00:44:25,879
Speaker 1: me if I wanted to play Fortnite with her.

1012
00:44:26,600 --> 00:44:28,840
Speaker 2: That's so funny, she called Whoopy's boyfriend.

1013
00:44:28,880 --> 00:44:32,120
Speaker 1: She's like, stop taking up her time, right, she needs

1014
00:44:32,120 --> 00:44:32,600
Speaker 1: to call me?

1015
00:44:33,880 --> 00:44:36,080
Speaker 2: Fine? Hello, She's like, let's pay Fortnite.

1016
00:44:36,160 --> 00:44:38,600
Speaker 1: Yeah. I was thinking like, if there's four calls at

1017
00:44:38,640 --> 00:44:41,080
Speaker 1: two am, I was thinking like, oh, there's an emergency.

1018
00:44:41,440 --> 00:44:44,719
Speaker 2: Well there is an emergency fortnite and it's Fortnite. Yeah.

1019
00:44:44,920 --> 00:44:47,400
Speaker 1: Once I said no, she looked mad and said, you've

1020
00:44:47,440 --> 00:44:48,720
Speaker 1: been such an a whole lately.

1021
00:44:49,080 --> 00:44:52,080
Speaker 2: What did what did my boyfriend's name do to you?

1022
00:44:52,360 --> 00:44:53,799
Speaker 2: Instantly I got mad.

1023
00:44:54,280 --> 00:44:56,600
Speaker 1: It wouldn't have bothered me much if she only talked

1024
00:44:56,600 --> 00:44:59,560
Speaker 1: about me, but she blamed someone else for my behaviors.

1025
00:45:00,080 --> 00:45:00,879
Speaker 2: In a way, this.

1026
00:45:00,840 --> 00:45:03,520
Speaker 1: Made me see how trapped she made me feel by

1027
00:45:03,680 --> 00:45:07,120
Speaker 1: always accommodating her. Thus she feels like she can do

1028
00:45:07,320 --> 00:45:10,520
Speaker 1: or say anything she wants. This is when I realized

1029
00:45:10,560 --> 00:45:14,240
Speaker 1: how manipulating she was. After this, I officially cut off

1030
00:45:14,280 --> 00:45:17,080
Speaker 1: all communication to her. I wanted to end everything on

1031
00:45:17,120 --> 00:45:18,880
Speaker 1: a good note, but once I found out what she

1032
00:45:19,000 --> 00:45:21,920
Speaker 1: said to my friends behind my back, it truly hurt me.

1033
00:45:22,160 --> 00:45:25,239
Speaker 1: To sum up what she said, she was purposely using me,

1034
00:45:25,600 --> 00:45:28,080
Speaker 1: and despite knowing how much I was going through in

1035
00:45:28,120 --> 00:45:31,040
Speaker 1: my own life, she was too selfish to change. She

1036
00:45:31,120 --> 00:45:34,759
Speaker 1: feels bad, but it's whatever now because she has come

1037
00:45:34,840 --> 00:45:35,760
Speaker 1: so far already.

1038
00:45:35,880 --> 00:45:38,520
Speaker 2: One thing she just doesn't understand was how could I

1039
00:45:38,640 --> 00:45:40,960
Speaker 2: get someone like my boyfriend to like me. That's what

1040
00:45:41,000 --> 00:45:42,960
Speaker 2: I'm thinking. I think she's just jealous. She just wants

1041
00:45:43,000 --> 00:45:43,560
Speaker 2: your boyfriend.

1042
00:45:43,680 --> 00:45:45,759
Speaker 1: She's just jealous that you can lock down a guy. Yes,

1043
00:45:46,239 --> 00:45:48,320
Speaker 1: she needs you to text all of the boys. Given

1044
00:45:48,320 --> 00:45:50,120
Speaker 1: that we are family and we do see each other

1045
00:45:50,200 --> 00:45:52,880
Speaker 1: during family events, I try my hardest to keep my distance.

1046
00:45:53,160 --> 00:45:54,960
Speaker 2: My family understands.

1047
00:45:54,440 --> 00:45:56,520
Speaker 1: That we had a fallout, but would try to get

1048
00:45:56,600 --> 00:45:58,879
Speaker 1: us to hug or do things together, things that make

1049
00:45:58,920 --> 00:46:01,919
Speaker 1: me feel uncomfortable. Without a doubt, I am still hurt

1050
00:46:01,960 --> 00:46:05,279
Speaker 1: because she traumatized me during my whole childhood. It is

1051
00:46:05,320 --> 00:46:07,560
Speaker 1: hard for me to make friends now and get close

1052
00:46:07,600 --> 00:46:10,040
Speaker 1: to any other family members because I'm afraid they will

1053
00:46:10,080 --> 00:46:12,319
Speaker 1: hurt me like she did. I've never told my side

1054
00:46:12,320 --> 00:46:14,799
Speaker 1: of the story to my family because I respect that

1055
00:46:14,880 --> 00:46:18,279
Speaker 1: privacy she and I deserve. However, I can tell that

1056
00:46:18,320 --> 00:46:21,080
Speaker 1: she's told her side of the story as the victim

1057
00:46:21,200 --> 00:46:23,400
Speaker 1: to some of my family members, because there's been many

1058
00:46:23,440 --> 00:46:26,680
Speaker 1: times they've given me the judgmental side I look even

1059
00:46:26,760 --> 00:46:27,160
Speaker 1: until now.

1060
00:46:27,200 --> 00:46:28,760
Speaker 2: My mom thinks our friendship.

1061
00:46:28,400 --> 00:46:33,040
Speaker 1: Ended because I got jealous that she will steal my boyfriends, spreading.

1062
00:46:32,600 --> 00:46:37,200
Speaker 2: Lies, writing lies, and deceit. But you never need to

1063
00:46:37,200 --> 00:46:39,800
Speaker 2: feel jealous because you can join us live on YouTube

1064
00:46:39,880 --> 00:46:43,000
Speaker 2: every weekday at three PMPSD. Just tap our profile. There's

1065
00:46:43,000 --> 00:46:45,080
Speaker 2: no one else but you, no one else. We're here

1066
00:46:45,120 --> 00:46:49,200
Speaker 2: for you. There's another update. But what are we thinking?

1067
00:46:49,440 --> 00:46:52,439
Speaker 1: Man? Oh man, I think we just need to stop. Yeah,

1068
00:46:52,640 --> 00:46:55,000
Speaker 1: just get her out, get her out of this as

1069
00:46:55,080 --> 00:46:58,920
Speaker 1: much as you can. Low contact. Yeah, don't block her.

1070
00:46:59,120 --> 00:47:00,440
Speaker 1: I don't know, do block her?

1071
00:47:00,440 --> 00:47:02,279
Speaker 2: I mean right right?

1072
00:47:02,440 --> 00:47:05,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, if you can, if you have the opportunity to

1073
00:47:05,040 --> 00:47:07,960
Speaker 1: defend yourself to your family members, like that's not true, Yeah,

1074
00:47:07,960 --> 00:47:09,839
Speaker 1: because you don't want to lose them because of lies

1075
00:47:09,880 --> 00:47:13,440
Speaker 1: that she's feeding. Like come on, turn your phone on

1076
00:47:13,560 --> 00:47:16,360
Speaker 1: silent at two in the morning. Yeah, have your boyfriend

1077
00:47:16,400 --> 00:47:19,839
Speaker 1: block her right, just get her out, Get her out

1078
00:47:19,880 --> 00:47:22,440
Speaker 1: of there. But there is more to this story, so

1079
00:47:22,680 --> 00:47:25,880
Speaker 1: let's see this update. I was doing okay and not

1080
00:47:25,960 --> 00:47:28,800
Speaker 1: letting this whole thing bother me until something happened again.

1081
00:47:28,920 --> 00:47:29,439
Speaker 2: Last night.

1082
00:47:29,600 --> 00:47:32,120
Speaker 1: My family had to hang out, and obviously my niece

1083
00:47:32,160 --> 00:47:34,680
Speaker 1: was there. She had a couple of drinks and approached

1084
00:47:34,680 --> 00:47:37,160
Speaker 1: me with some hugs. After that, she decided to bring

1085
00:47:37,239 --> 00:47:39,279
Speaker 1: up the facts that one of my friends that she

1086
00:47:39,480 --> 00:47:41,759
Speaker 1: used to also be friends with gained a lot of

1087
00:47:41,800 --> 00:47:43,759
Speaker 1: weight and became unrecognizable.

1088
00:47:44,320 --> 00:47:47,000
Speaker 2: Boo hoo. Why don't you keep your mouth shut?

1089
00:47:47,120 --> 00:47:49,759
Speaker 1: Yeah, come on now, Although she did mention that my

1090
00:47:49,800 --> 00:47:52,080
Speaker 1: friend is still pretty like she used to be.

1091
00:47:52,560 --> 00:47:55,440
Speaker 2: Oh, ew, that's such a bad way to say that.

1092
00:47:56,120 --> 00:47:59,040
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, she kept mentioning how my friend got

1093
00:47:59,360 --> 00:48:01,120
Speaker 2: really boo, oh my god. Come on.

1094
00:48:01,400 --> 00:48:04,400
Speaker 1: While saying this, she giggled and was seeking validation from me,

1095
00:48:04,600 --> 00:48:06,920
Speaker 1: hoping I would agree and talk crap about my friend

1096
00:48:06,920 --> 00:48:09,360
Speaker 1: with her. This pissed me off, and I asked, is

1097
00:48:09,360 --> 00:48:11,880
Speaker 1: that how you really feel? And once again continued to

1098
00:48:11,960 --> 00:48:14,920
Speaker 1: laugh nervously and defend herself by saying she is not

1099
00:48:15,000 --> 00:48:18,440
Speaker 1: judging anyone and is only commenting on what she noticed

1100
00:48:18,640 --> 00:48:22,480
Speaker 1: while repeatedly describing my friend's figure as really big.

1101
00:48:22,840 --> 00:48:23,720
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh.

1102
00:48:23,840 --> 00:48:26,200
Speaker 1: This friend of mine has been feeling insecure about her

1103
00:48:26,239 --> 00:48:29,359
Speaker 1: weight gain after getting into a happy relationship. Thus, I

1104
00:48:29,480 --> 00:48:32,040
Speaker 1: understand how she would have felt if she heard this

1105
00:48:32,080 --> 00:48:34,640
Speaker 1: in person. Not to mention, my friend also had a

1106
00:48:34,640 --> 00:48:37,359
Speaker 1: bad experience while being friends with my niece. After that,

1107
00:48:37,480 --> 00:48:40,680
Speaker 1: my niece proceeded to apologize for her past behaviors like

1108
00:48:40,760 --> 00:48:42,840
Speaker 1: she used to once. I told my older brother what

1109
00:48:42,920 --> 00:48:45,440
Speaker 1: she said to my friend and for apologizing like she

1110
00:48:45,480 --> 00:48:46,320
Speaker 1: always does.

1111
00:48:46,280 --> 00:48:48,960
Speaker 2: Hoping that we would reconcile like we always did. He

1112
00:48:49,000 --> 00:48:52,719
Speaker 2: called me immature whoa. He claimed blood.

1113
00:48:52,440 --> 00:48:56,000
Speaker 1: Is thicker than water and we are still family, therefore

1114
00:48:56,160 --> 00:48:58,680
Speaker 1: I should just forgive and become close with her again.

1115
00:48:58,719 --> 00:49:01,000
Speaker 1: I think he does not understand and how much she

1116
00:49:01,080 --> 00:49:03,080
Speaker 1: has put me through. I would like to know if

1117
00:49:03,120 --> 00:49:06,440
Speaker 1: I am a whole for not wanting to reconcile with

1118
00:49:06,600 --> 00:49:09,399
Speaker 1: my knees after everything that has happened. As an adult now,

1119
00:49:09,480 --> 00:49:11,800
Speaker 1: I can recognize the things she had done to wrong me,

1120
00:49:11,960 --> 00:49:14,720
Speaker 1: but there's a part of me that thinks I'm just overreacting.

1121
00:49:14,880 --> 00:49:17,640
Speaker 1: Please let me know your thoughts and thanks. For reading,

1122
00:49:17,880 --> 00:49:19,880
Speaker 1: have a good day. Do not think that you are

1123
00:49:19,880 --> 00:49:22,719
Speaker 1: the a hole. Your niece sucks and she keeps.

1124
00:49:22,600 --> 00:49:26,520
Speaker 3: And start stuff, And the more power that you give her,

1125
00:49:26,600 --> 00:49:29,920
Speaker 3: the more power she's gonna take. Yeah, and she's just

1126
00:49:29,960 --> 00:49:31,919
Speaker 3: gonna keep trying to mess with your life.

1127
00:49:32,200 --> 00:49:35,840
Speaker 2: Right, It's like, I don't I think even if like all.

1128
00:49:35,680 --> 00:49:37,719
Speaker 1: Of the things that she did to you were like

1129
00:49:37,840 --> 00:49:40,279
Speaker 1: out of the question, like this, let's just say you,

1130
00:49:40,600 --> 00:49:42,560
Speaker 1: I don't know, forget her for that stuff, you can

1131
00:49:42,600 --> 00:49:45,279
Speaker 1: still just not like a person, you know, and just

1132
00:49:45,360 --> 00:49:48,040
Speaker 1: realize that with her, Yeah, she's just not somebody you

1133
00:49:48,040 --> 00:49:50,400
Speaker 1: want to be around, and you can just leave it

1134
00:49:50,440 --> 00:49:51,000
Speaker 1: alone like that.

1135
00:49:51,080 --> 00:49:53,799
Speaker 2: Like that's also so understandable. So it's like that on

1136
00:49:53,880 --> 00:49:55,920
Speaker 2: top of everything that she did to you, is like,

1137
00:49:56,600 --> 00:49:57,640
Speaker 2: I think you're totally fine.

1138
00:49:58,120 --> 00:50:01,480
Speaker 1: So my boyfriend shot I heard my phone because an

1139
00:50:01,520 --> 00:50:02,720
Speaker 1: I'm houseman.

1140
00:50:02,360 --> 00:50:03,480
Speaker 2: Gave me a flower.

1141
00:50:03,600 --> 00:50:05,520
Speaker 1: My birthday was a couple of days ago, and I

1142
00:50:05,560 --> 00:50:08,680
Speaker 1: haven't spoken to him since I'm heartbroken about this. I

1143
00:50:08,760 --> 00:50:11,120
Speaker 1: was walking home with my boyfriend and we passed a

1144
00:50:11,120 --> 00:50:13,560
Speaker 1: group of homeless people. One of them said, here you go,

1145
00:50:13,680 --> 00:50:16,600
Speaker 1: miss since you're the first woman who walked by and

1146
00:50:16,680 --> 00:50:18,120
Speaker 1: gave me a dead flower.

1147
00:50:18,280 --> 00:50:20,320
Speaker 2: Oh okay with the stulet count so lovely.

1148
00:50:20,480 --> 00:50:23,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, all flowers are dead once they're pick It was

1149
00:50:23,080 --> 00:50:25,239
Speaker 1: around ten pm and my birthday was at midnight, so

1150
00:50:25,280 --> 00:50:26,560
Speaker 1: it kind of felt special to me.

1151
00:50:27,040 --> 00:50:28,960
Speaker 2: I said thank you so much and ketch walking.

1152
00:50:29,280 --> 00:50:32,360
Speaker 1: My boyfriend didn't say anything, so I didn't think anything

1153
00:50:32,440 --> 00:50:34,760
Speaker 1: was wrong. By the way, this comes from a puzzle

1154
00:50:34,800 --> 00:50:37,919
Speaker 1: headed rip seven oh seventy five on the r slash

1155
00:50:38,000 --> 00:50:40,160
Speaker 1: Okay storytime separate it. So I took my phone to

1156
00:50:40,200 --> 00:50:42,000
Speaker 1: take a video of the flower and tell my friend

1157
00:50:42,160 --> 00:50:45,160
Speaker 1: what just happened, and he tried taking my phone. I

1158
00:50:45,320 --> 00:50:47,440
Speaker 1: was laughing and asked what he's doing.

1159
00:50:47,280 --> 00:50:49,680
Speaker 2: And he didn't answer, just kept walking next to me.

1160
00:50:49,800 --> 00:50:51,920
Speaker 1: He looked a little annoyed, but I still wanted to

1161
00:50:51,920 --> 00:50:53,560
Speaker 1: get a video with the flower, so I pulled my

1162
00:50:53,640 --> 00:50:54,440
Speaker 1: phone out again.

1163
00:50:54,719 --> 00:50:55,440
Speaker 2: This time he.

1164
00:50:55,480 --> 00:50:58,880
Speaker 1: Hit my hand really hard and made me drop my

1165
00:50:58,960 --> 00:51:03,040
Speaker 1: phone on the con My phone screen is completely broken.

1166
00:51:03,440 --> 00:51:07,239
Speaker 1: Luckily it's the screen protector, but still it's all shattered.

1167
00:51:07,280 --> 00:51:09,919
Speaker 1: I screamed, why did you do that? And he took

1168
00:51:09,960 --> 00:51:12,560
Speaker 1: my flower and threw it on the road. He said,

1169
00:51:12,840 --> 00:51:13,279
Speaker 1: that's what.

1170
00:51:13,280 --> 00:51:16,279
Speaker 2: I get for embarrassing him like that. Immediately break up.

1171
00:51:16,400 --> 00:51:18,720
Speaker 1: I was tearing up because one he broke my phone,

1172
00:51:18,960 --> 00:51:20,759
Speaker 1: two he threw my flower away.

1173
00:51:20,600 --> 00:51:23,240
Speaker 2: And three I couldn't understand what I did wrong. Nothing.

1174
00:51:23,400 --> 00:51:25,400
Speaker 1: He made me delete the video with a flower in

1175
00:51:25,400 --> 00:51:27,839
Speaker 1: front of him, and we walked in silence the rest

1176
00:51:27,880 --> 00:51:29,880
Speaker 1: of the time. You can recover that at home. I

1177
00:51:29,920 --> 00:51:33,040
Speaker 1: blew up at him. I was crying, screaming, asking why

1178
00:51:33,080 --> 00:51:36,520
Speaker 1: he did that. Literally an hour before my birthday. He said,

1179
00:51:36,680 --> 00:51:38,440
Speaker 1: how would you feel if a girl just came out

1180
00:51:38,440 --> 00:51:40,120
Speaker 1: to me in front of you and gave me a flower?

1181
00:51:40,360 --> 00:51:42,719
Speaker 1: And I said, if it were the same homeless woman

1182
00:51:42,760 --> 00:51:44,920
Speaker 1: that you see almost every day when you walk in

1183
00:51:44,920 --> 00:51:48,440
Speaker 1: your neighborhood, I wouldn't mind. We've walked by this specific

1184
00:51:48,480 --> 00:51:51,400
Speaker 1: man plenty of times. He called me a liar and

1185
00:51:51,440 --> 00:51:54,120
Speaker 1: then said I was manipulative to try to invalidate his

1186
00:51:54,160 --> 00:51:56,719
Speaker 1: feelings when I was blatantly disrespecting him in front of

1187
00:51:56,760 --> 00:51:57,160
Speaker 1: other men.

1188
00:51:57,280 --> 00:52:00,239
Speaker 2: I don't understand how it's disrespectful. I wasn't even going

1189
00:52:00,280 --> 00:52:02,320
Speaker 2: to keep the dang thing. It was a dead flower.

1190
00:52:02,360 --> 00:52:04,480
Speaker 1: I just thought it was cool because that never happened

1191
00:52:04,480 --> 00:52:07,360
Speaker 1: to me, especially two hours before my birthday. He said

1192
00:52:07,560 --> 00:52:09,920
Speaker 1: a bunch of stuff, basically that I was an attention

1193
00:52:10,120 --> 00:52:11,400
Speaker 1: or I was sobbing.

1194
00:52:11,600 --> 00:52:13,040
Speaker 2: It was already my birthday and.

1195
00:52:12,960 --> 00:52:15,520
Speaker 1: I felt like crap. We went to sleep without talking,

1196
00:52:15,560 --> 00:52:17,360
Speaker 1: and the next morning he was gone. I had a

1197
00:52:17,360 --> 00:52:20,040
Speaker 1: brunch with my friends, so I had my mind distracted

1198
00:52:20,040 --> 00:52:21,840
Speaker 1: for a couple of hours, but it was still in

1199
00:52:21,880 --> 00:52:22,360
Speaker 1: the back.

1200
00:52:22,160 --> 00:52:23,920
Speaker 2: Of my mind. I still don't know who was one

1201
00:52:24,000 --> 00:52:25,160
Speaker 2: hundred percent in the wrong here.

1202
00:52:25,280 --> 00:52:28,160
Speaker 1: Maybe I shouldn't have accepted the flower, but I honestly

1203
00:52:28,239 --> 00:52:29,359
Speaker 1: saw it as an innocent thing.

1204
00:52:29,560 --> 00:52:30,600
Speaker 2: He still won't talk to me.

1205
00:52:30,719 --> 00:52:32,880
Speaker 1: Even his siblings wish me a happy birthday, but he

1206
00:52:32,920 --> 00:52:34,919
Speaker 1: hasn't yet. I don't know what to do. I don't

1207
00:52:34,920 --> 00:52:37,040
Speaker 1: want to lose my boyfriend over a flower. It's not

1208
00:52:37,080 --> 00:52:40,840
Speaker 1: over a flower. It's over your boyfriend being insecure, jealous

1209
00:52:40,920 --> 00:52:42,120
Speaker 1: for no reason.

1210
00:52:41,840 --> 00:52:42,640
Speaker 2: And hitting you.

1211
00:52:43,120 --> 00:52:46,280
Speaker 1: Yeah, literally hit your hand, Yes, broke your phone. Bye,

1212
00:52:46,400 --> 00:52:48,520
Speaker 1: Hello everyone, Thank you so so much for all of

1213
00:52:48,520 --> 00:52:48,879
Speaker 1: the help.

1214
00:52:49,120 --> 00:52:53,160
Speaker 2: I broke up with him. Yes, what so efficient?

1215
00:52:53,800 --> 00:52:54,280
Speaker 1: Ah?

1216
00:52:54,320 --> 00:52:58,359
Speaker 2: So efficient? Oh my gosh, I'm so relieved. Oh my god.

1217
00:52:58,400 --> 00:53:01,680
Speaker 2: I love how quick that was. Yes, me too.

1218
00:53:02,080 --> 00:53:04,040
Speaker 1: To be honest, I still love him, and I'm trying

1219
00:53:04,040 --> 00:53:05,960
Speaker 1: to cut all communication because I know that if he

1220
00:53:06,040 --> 00:53:07,960
Speaker 1: contacts me again, I'll most likely go back.

1221
00:53:08,040 --> 00:53:11,000
Speaker 2: I feel you. I literally we've all been there.

1222
00:53:11,520 --> 00:53:13,600
Speaker 1: I literally made a list of all the reasons why

1223
00:53:13,680 --> 00:53:15,560
Speaker 1: he sucks, and I try to read it every time

1224
00:53:15,600 --> 00:53:16,439
Speaker 1: I want to text him.

1225
00:53:16,480 --> 00:53:19,520
Speaker 2: Here's the update. He surprised me with my favorite flowers

1226
00:53:19,520 --> 00:53:20,000
Speaker 2: and a letter.

1227
00:53:20,280 --> 00:53:22,920
Speaker 1: He wished me happy birthday and apologized for his reaction.

1228
00:53:23,360 --> 00:53:25,840
Speaker 1: He said he was being immature and it won't happen again.

1229
00:53:26,680 --> 00:53:29,440
Speaker 2: Don't believe him. He said we should work on communicating

1230
00:53:29,480 --> 00:53:32,320
Speaker 2: each other's boundaries better. That is not a boundary. Okay,

1231
00:53:32,600 --> 00:53:33,840
Speaker 2: let's make this very clear.

1232
00:53:34,080 --> 00:53:37,319
Speaker 1: There is a big difference between insecurity of like, you know,

1233
00:53:37,760 --> 00:53:41,040
Speaker 1: jealousy and stuff like that, and your actual boundaries. He

1234
00:53:41,120 --> 00:53:43,759
Speaker 1: also apologized for ghosting me for a few days. He

1235
00:53:43,800 --> 00:53:45,879
Speaker 1: said he just needed some time to cool down.

1236
00:53:46,080 --> 00:53:46,759
Speaker 2: Not going to lie.

1237
00:53:46,800 --> 00:53:49,320
Speaker 1: I just wanted my boyfriend back, So I accepted the apology.

1238
00:53:50,040 --> 00:53:53,240
Speaker 1: I know, I know, I'm like really trying to remember

1239
00:53:53,280 --> 00:53:56,239
Speaker 1: that she broke up with him. As the apology under

1240
00:53:56,280 --> 00:53:59,120
Speaker 1: the condition that he will never do anything like that again.

1241
00:53:59,280 --> 00:54:01,600
Speaker 2: He's wore on his life that he'll never make me

1242
00:54:01,680 --> 00:54:03,560
Speaker 2: cry again. He's a liar. He's a liar.

1243
00:54:04,640 --> 00:54:06,880
Speaker 1: Like, if anyone says that, like, they're a liar, I'm sorry.

1244
00:54:07,000 --> 00:54:09,080
Speaker 1: I genuinely saw a shift in his personality.

1245
00:54:09,120 --> 00:54:09,600
Speaker 2: Oh you did it.

1246
00:54:09,719 --> 00:54:11,880
Speaker 1: He's a liar, baby girl, he's a liar.

1247
00:54:12,360 --> 00:54:14,880
Speaker 2: He was even better than when I first fell for him. No,

1248
00:54:14,960 --> 00:54:18,480
Speaker 2: of course he was. Of course, he was bumming love bumming.

1249
00:54:18,640 --> 00:54:21,640
Speaker 1: Like one time we were cuddling and talking about our relationship.

1250
00:54:21,760 --> 00:54:24,319
Speaker 1: He literally started crying while he was professing his love

1251
00:54:24,360 --> 00:54:26,759
Speaker 1: for me. He said that he knows that sometimes he

1252
00:54:26,800 --> 00:54:29,520
Speaker 1: gets frustrated over little things, but it's because he loves

1253
00:54:29,520 --> 00:54:31,360
Speaker 1: me so much and he's terrified to lose me.

1254
00:54:31,600 --> 00:54:33,400
Speaker 2: He shared so many things about his past.

1255
00:54:33,480 --> 00:54:35,719
Speaker 1: He had never opened up to me before, so it

1256
00:54:35,800 --> 00:54:40,279
Speaker 1: really felt like the relationship grew stronger. We went to

1257
00:54:40,360 --> 00:54:42,640
Speaker 1: the beach as a little birthday celebration for me with

1258
00:54:42,680 --> 00:54:45,360
Speaker 1: his friends. We were six in total, and I was

1259
00:54:45,400 --> 00:54:47,879
Speaker 1: the only girl. Two other girls were supposed to come

1260
00:54:47,920 --> 00:54:50,000
Speaker 1: to but they had work. I didn't know that until

1261
00:54:50,040 --> 00:54:51,719
Speaker 1: I asked one of the guys and he told me

1262
00:54:52,160 --> 00:54:54,120
Speaker 1: long story short, he got mad at me for wearing

1263
00:54:54,120 --> 00:54:54,600
Speaker 1: a bikini.

1264
00:54:54,640 --> 00:54:55,439
Speaker 2: Of course he did, of course.

1265
00:54:55,480 --> 00:54:59,240
Speaker 1: He He was like, WGF, do I look like having

1266
00:54:59,320 --> 00:55:03,080
Speaker 1: my girl walk around half naked like h in front

1267
00:55:03,120 --> 00:55:05,520
Speaker 1: of everyone. I reminded him that we're at the beach

1268
00:55:05,680 --> 00:55:07,399
Speaker 1: and a lot of people wear bikinis at the beach.

1269
00:55:07,480 --> 00:55:07,600
Speaker 2: Oh.

1270
00:55:08,000 --> 00:55:10,439
Speaker 1: He said that it's different because I'm the only girl

1271
00:55:10,480 --> 00:55:12,520
Speaker 1: here with five guys and it makes me look bad.

1272
00:55:12,640 --> 00:55:14,760
Speaker 2: I said I didn't care, and I went back to everyone.

1273
00:55:14,880 --> 00:55:17,000
Speaker 2: After a little while, he pulled me to the side again.

1274
00:55:17,080 --> 00:55:19,360
Speaker 1: He called me names, said that one of his friends

1275
00:55:19,440 --> 00:55:22,359
Speaker 1: obviously wants to f me, but I'm too effing dumb

1276
00:55:22,440 --> 00:55:24,759
Speaker 1: to see it. He said he overheard him. I don't

1277
00:55:24,760 --> 00:55:26,600
Speaker 1: think this is true, but I don't know. He was

1278
00:55:26,719 --> 00:55:29,000
Speaker 1: very angry, but also he had been drinking, so it

1279
00:55:29,040 --> 00:55:29,960
Speaker 1: could explain his.

1280
00:55:29,920 --> 00:55:31,760
Speaker 2: Rascual girl no no.

1281
00:55:32,080 --> 00:55:34,279
Speaker 1: I started crying then went home because I didn't want

1282
00:55:34,320 --> 00:55:36,920
Speaker 1: people to see me like that. He was being so weird.

1283
00:55:37,280 --> 00:55:39,359
Speaker 1: I don't know why he was being aggressive of all

1284
00:55:39,400 --> 00:55:41,400
Speaker 1: of a sudden, because that is who he is, like

1285
00:55:41,440 --> 00:55:43,640
Speaker 1: before with the flower incident, he had never used that

1286
00:55:43,680 --> 00:55:46,399
Speaker 1: kind of language with me, especially in public. He came

1287
00:55:46,440 --> 00:55:48,400
Speaker 1: over that night to talk about what had happened. I

1288
00:55:48,480 --> 00:55:51,320
Speaker 1: was so hurt. I honestly thought we had grown closer.

1289
00:55:51,400 --> 00:55:53,799
Speaker 1: We both explained our side of the situation. I told

1290
00:55:53,880 --> 00:55:56,160
Speaker 1: him I wasn't trying to get anyone's attention by wearing

1291
00:55:56,160 --> 00:55:58,759
Speaker 1: a bikini, and I can kind of understand his point

1292
00:55:58,760 --> 00:56:00,920
Speaker 1: of view because I was a little uncomfortable too, being

1293
00:56:00,920 --> 00:56:02,600
Speaker 1: the only girl there. He said, I could have put

1294
00:56:02,600 --> 00:56:05,239
Speaker 1: my clothes back on, but I had to stay in

1295
00:56:05,320 --> 00:56:09,839
Speaker 1: a mcginni. He said, I looked like h waiting to

1296
00:56:09,880 --> 00:56:12,439
Speaker 1: get eft. I looked like that when I was laying

1297
00:56:12,480 --> 00:56:15,239
Speaker 1: on my stomach tanning. I can't really remember what he

1298
00:56:15,280 --> 00:56:15,920
Speaker 1: said after that.

1299
00:56:16,000 --> 00:56:17,240
Speaker 2: I was just so hurt.

1300
00:56:17,400 --> 00:56:20,040
Speaker 1: We were going in circles, so we decided to just

1301
00:56:20,120 --> 00:56:23,480
Speaker 1: go to bed. He then tried to initiate spicy sleep,

1302
00:56:23,800 --> 00:56:26,560
Speaker 1: which just pissed me off. I said no. Every time

1303
00:56:27,160 --> 00:56:29,440
Speaker 1: I heard him say something about me being an annoying

1304
00:56:29,560 --> 00:56:32,240
Speaker 1: bee under his breath, and that was the last straw.

1305
00:56:32,520 --> 00:56:34,839
Speaker 1: I kicked him out and broke up with him.

1306
00:56:34,880 --> 00:56:35,080
Speaker 3: There.

1307
00:56:37,239 --> 00:56:41,000
Speaker 1: You deserve so much better than this tree. Better literally

1308
00:56:41,080 --> 00:56:44,040
Speaker 1: anyone out there in the comments. If you have a

1309
00:56:44,080 --> 00:56:46,520
Speaker 1: partner who is treating you like this, and you notice

1310
00:56:46,560 --> 00:56:48,440
Speaker 1: this switch of them being.

1311
00:56:48,480 --> 00:56:50,640
Speaker 2: Super loving, and you know, you're like, oh.

1312
00:56:50,560 --> 00:56:53,600
Speaker 3: Well, sometimes they're just so nice to me, and then

1313
00:56:53,640 --> 00:56:56,759
Speaker 3: they behave like this. Yes, they do not love you.

1314
00:56:57,120 --> 00:57:00,279
Speaker 3: It wasn't easy. He was crying and screaming the whole time,

1315
00:57:00,400 --> 00:57:02,160
Speaker 3: because he even punched the wall in my room.

1316
00:57:02,160 --> 00:57:02,560
Speaker 2: Of course he.

1317
00:57:02,560 --> 00:57:05,600
Speaker 1: Didn't, of course, also anyone who punches walls. Yeah, I

1318
00:57:05,760 --> 00:57:08,319
Speaker 1: was terrified. I never thought he could do that. We

1319
00:57:08,480 --> 00:57:10,960
Speaker 1: never fought like that before. He finally left when I

1320
00:57:11,000 --> 00:57:13,200
Speaker 1: dialed nine when one and threatened to call. I don't

1321
00:57:13,239 --> 00:57:15,960
Speaker 1: know why I still love him so much. I understand

1322
00:57:16,080 --> 00:57:18,600
Speaker 1: his reactions, knowing his past and what he's been through,

1323
00:57:18,680 --> 00:57:19,280
Speaker 1: and it's a lot.

1324
00:57:19,400 --> 00:57:19,840
Speaker 2: Trust me.

1325
00:57:19,960 --> 00:57:22,440
Speaker 1: I know it's not an excuse, but still an explanation.

1326
00:57:22,640 --> 00:57:24,520
Speaker 1: Right anyway, it's over now.

1327
00:57:25,000 --> 00:57:25,560
Speaker 2: Half of my.

1328
00:57:25,560 --> 00:57:27,640
Speaker 1: Stuff is still at his house. I don't even want

1329
00:57:27,680 --> 00:57:29,760
Speaker 1: to think about it right now, he's blocked. I'm really

1330
00:57:29,760 --> 00:57:32,080
Speaker 1: trying to realize him good in my mind so that

1331
00:57:32,160 --> 00:57:34,040
Speaker 1: I can move on. But it's hard when all I

1332
00:57:34,040 --> 00:57:36,240
Speaker 1: can think of is the amazing moments we shared, like

1333
00:57:36,360 --> 00:57:38,160
Speaker 1: how he was crying in my arms telling me that

1334
00:57:38,200 --> 00:57:40,120
Speaker 1: he loves me more than life, the day he asked

1335
00:57:40,160 --> 00:57:42,160
Speaker 1: me to be his girlfriend, or the day he gave

1336
00:57:42,160 --> 00:57:44,800
Speaker 1: me a promise ring. Maybe I did go wrong somewhere.

1337
00:57:44,920 --> 00:57:46,760
Speaker 1: It's just so crazy. To think that all of this

1338
00:57:46,800 --> 00:57:49,040
Speaker 1: could have been avoided if I hadn't accepted the flower.

1339
00:57:49,200 --> 00:57:51,920
Speaker 2: No, the thing is that it wouldn't have been avoided. No,

1340
00:57:51,960 --> 00:57:53,960
Speaker 2: because there's always there was, still there was.

1341
00:57:54,800 --> 00:57:56,520
Speaker 3: Yeah, the beach Duff came up, there would It's going

1342
00:57:56,600 --> 00:57:58,760
Speaker 3: to be something, there's all. Yeah, there's always gonna be another,

1343
00:57:58,880 --> 00:58:00,880
Speaker 3: always going to be something. So I am very aware

1344
00:58:00,920 --> 00:58:03,000
Speaker 3: that I'm dumb for thinking that he could change so quick.

1345
00:58:03,040 --> 00:58:05,000
Speaker 3: I just wanted my boyfriend back. Thank you again for

1346
00:58:05,080 --> 00:58:07,960
Speaker 3: everyone for the advice update number two. Hey everyone, I

1347
00:58:07,960 --> 00:58:10,240
Speaker 3: think this is the final update on the situation. I

1348
00:58:10,280 --> 00:58:13,200
Speaker 3: am ashamed to admit it, but I went back one

1349
00:58:13,240 --> 00:58:15,920
Speaker 3: more time. I know it was a stupid choice. It's

1350
00:58:15,920 --> 00:58:18,120
Speaker 3: hard to explain. It's like he has a hold on me.

1351
00:58:18,280 --> 00:58:21,120
Speaker 3: At first, it was just about the spicy sleep, nothing more.

1352
00:58:21,160 --> 00:58:23,120
Speaker 3: We didn't want to completely cut each other off, but

1353
00:58:23,200 --> 00:58:25,680
Speaker 3: I didn't want to officially get back together or start

1354
00:58:25,720 --> 00:58:28,280
Speaker 3: meeting new people, so we agreed this would be the best.

1355
00:58:28,120 --> 00:58:30,120
Speaker 2: Option, and for a while it actually worked.

1356
00:58:30,240 --> 00:58:32,600
Speaker 1: After the fifth or sixth time, we decided to try

1357
00:58:32,680 --> 00:58:35,120
Speaker 1: getting back together, but to do it right this time,

1358
00:58:35,200 --> 00:58:38,320
Speaker 1: I laid out my boundaries. No yelling, no cursing at me,

1359
00:58:38,440 --> 00:58:41,200
Speaker 1: no hitting, no going through my stuff, and being respectful.

1360
00:58:41,400 --> 00:58:43,320
Speaker 2: I made it clear that if he crossed any of

1361
00:58:43,360 --> 00:58:44,640
Speaker 2: these lines, I would leave him.

1362
00:58:44,680 --> 00:58:47,080
Speaker 1: I told him I was in his emotional punching bag

1363
00:58:47,160 --> 00:58:49,280
Speaker 1: and that just because he's been through a lot doesn't

1364
00:58:49,320 --> 00:58:51,560
Speaker 1: mean that he can take it out on me, especially

1365
00:58:51,600 --> 00:58:53,880
Speaker 1: since I've never treated him that way. He agreed to

1366
00:58:53,920 --> 00:58:58,960
Speaker 1: everything and shared his own boundaries with no yelling, being respectful, modesty, ugh,

1367
00:58:59,280 --> 00:59:02,400
Speaker 1: and not going through his stuff. I also read some

1368
00:59:02,440 --> 00:59:04,400
Speaker 1: comments about how punching a wall can be the first

1369
00:59:04,400 --> 00:59:06,960
Speaker 1: stemp to punching someone, so I told him that that

1370
00:59:07,000 --> 00:59:09,080
Speaker 1: could never happen again. He agreed and even books a

1371
00:59:09,120 --> 00:59:12,560
Speaker 1: therapy appointment. Okay, he's really committed to self improvement. Anger

1372
00:59:12,560 --> 00:59:13,880
Speaker 1: and impulsiveness are.

1373
00:59:13,840 --> 00:59:15,040
Speaker 2: His only real issues.

1374
00:59:15,320 --> 00:59:18,680
Speaker 1: Big issues, Those big issues, Wood. We both wanted this

1375
00:59:18,760 --> 00:59:21,000
Speaker 1: to work. Our anniversary is coming up, and I didn't

1376
00:59:21,040 --> 00:59:22,919
Speaker 1: want to break up right before it. Things were going

1377
00:59:22,920 --> 00:59:25,040
Speaker 1: fine until he sent me a TikTok of my post

1378
00:59:25,160 --> 00:59:28,880
Speaker 1: and accused me of exaggerating everything, basically calling me a liar.

1379
00:59:28,880 --> 00:59:31,480
Speaker 1: I'm attaching some screenshots because to this day, I still

1380
00:59:31,520 --> 00:59:33,640
Speaker 1: don't understand why he was saying all that, I got

1381
00:59:33,640 --> 00:59:36,120
Speaker 1: mad and called him and we ended up screaming at

1382
00:59:36,120 --> 00:59:38,000
Speaker 1: each other over the phone. I felt like he was

1383
00:59:38,000 --> 00:59:41,120
Speaker 1: making everything about himself again and dismissing my feelings. Of course,

1384
00:59:41,200 --> 00:59:43,560
Speaker 1: because he was embarrassed, he came over with my stuff

1385
00:59:43,600 --> 00:59:46,400
Speaker 1: and broke up with me, insulting me the whole time.

1386
00:59:46,640 --> 00:59:48,640
Speaker 1: I didn't want things to end like that, so I

1387
00:59:48,680 --> 00:59:50,840
Speaker 1: asked him to stay and talk. Long story short, we

1388
00:59:50,960 --> 00:59:53,160
Speaker 1: ended up screaming at each other again, and he broke

1389
00:59:53,240 --> 00:59:54,040
Speaker 1: my MacBook.

1390
00:59:54,440 --> 00:59:55,760
Speaker 2: I'm so done.

1391
00:59:55,920 --> 00:59:58,760
Speaker 1: Luckily, I'm not going to school this semester, so I

1392
00:59:58,840 --> 01:00:01,120
Speaker 1: won't really need it, but he I still broke it, like.

1393
01:00:01,040 --> 01:00:01,520
Speaker 3: What the F?

1394
01:00:01,720 --> 01:00:06,840
Speaker 1: But luckily you can join us live on YouTube every

1395
01:00:06,880 --> 01:00:09,520
Speaker 1: weekday at three PMPSD just to tap our profile. I'm

1396
01:00:09,560 --> 01:00:11,480
Speaker 1: reading the book that was recommended to me, and it's

1397
01:00:11,480 --> 01:00:13,720
Speaker 1: hard to accept that my boyfriend is one of those people.

1398
01:00:13,800 --> 01:00:15,680
Speaker 1: I'm glad he broke up with me. I know he's

1399
01:00:15,720 --> 01:00:17,480
Speaker 1: not good for me. He hates me now, and it's

1400
01:00:17,520 --> 01:00:18,080
Speaker 1: for the best.

1401
01:00:18,400 --> 01:00:20,160
Speaker 2: I know he won't bother me again, and I have

1402
01:00:20,240 --> 01:00:21,800
Speaker 2: no reason to talk to him now that I have

1403
01:00:21,960 --> 01:00:24,160
Speaker 2: my stuff back. I'm still learning a lot, like what

1404
01:00:24,240 --> 01:00:26,000
Speaker 2: love bombing is there? You go.

1405
01:00:26,200 --> 01:00:28,320
Speaker 1: I didn't even know that's what he was doing. I

1406
01:00:28,360 --> 01:00:30,560
Speaker 1: know I'm naive, and that's why I wanted to stay

1407
01:00:30,560 --> 01:00:31,320
Speaker 1: single for a while.

1408
01:00:31,480 --> 01:00:34,000
Speaker 2: I don't want to end up in this situation again,

1409
01:00:34,120 --> 01:00:35,240
Speaker 2: you're not naive.

1410
01:00:35,640 --> 01:00:38,520
Speaker 3: Yeah, you were manipulated in a lot of ways, right,

1411
01:00:38,560 --> 01:00:40,880
Speaker 3: I mean it's easy for anyone to get in that situation.

1412
01:00:40,960 --> 01:00:44,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, because I'm sure, Yeah, it's very easy. Yeah, I'm

1413
01:00:44,240 --> 01:00:47,080
Speaker 1: sure in this situation. Sure it was like a slow burn. Yeah,

1414
01:00:47,120 --> 01:00:48,240
Speaker 1: exactly what I say.

1415
01:00:48,400 --> 01:00:51,760
Speaker 3: Manipulators don't just manipulate you off that and don't like

1416
01:00:51,840 --> 01:00:53,800
Speaker 3: snap on a dime.

1417
01:00:53,520 --> 01:00:55,760
Speaker 2: It builds to it. And that's also the end of

1418
01:00:55,760 --> 01:00:58,080
Speaker 2: the episode. Yeah, that's also the end of the episode.

1419
01:00:58,160 --> 01:01:00,600
Speaker 2: So if you love us, make sure to subscribe. We

1420
01:01:00,720 --> 01:01:03,200
Speaker 2: love you and see you tomorrow.