Speaker 1: Don't answer the phone.
Speaker 2: Elvis durand Elvis Duran's phone tap.
Speaker 3: Michael Oppenheimer strikes again. Dear Elvis, my son Milo gets
Speaker 3: crazy when telemarketers call the house. Huh mean Milo's been
Speaker 3: away for a while, so he's not familiar with Michael Oppenheimer.
Speaker 3: He won't recognize the voice, and Michael Oppenheimer's relentless sales
Speaker 3: pitches will drive Milo nuts. Please phone tap him. He's
Speaker 3: a crazy, wild guy. As you'll hear, he's gonna fall
Speaker 3: for a big time.
Speaker 1: All right.
Speaker 3: This is a phone tap done by Milo's mother Cheryl
Speaker 3: and Milo's sister Nina. All right, Scary's gonna play the
Speaker 3: part of Michael Oppenheimer selling alarm systems to Milo.
Speaker 1: Shall we listen in little Hello, good afternoon. This is
Speaker 1: mister Michael Oppenheimer with HT and Z home security systems.
Speaker 1: How are you doing today, sir?
Speaker 4: Uh? Not too good to right now?
Speaker 1: Oh yeah? Well did you know that one in every
Speaker 1: four homeowners have had their home robbed each year?
Speaker 4: I didn't know that. I'm sorry? Can I go because
Speaker 4: I really don't feel good?
Speaker 1: Did you know that every eight seconds of burglar breaks
Speaker 1: into another home?
Speaker 4: I'm sorry? I don't mean to be rude, sir, but
Speaker 4: I really gotta go right.
Speaker 1: Did you know that with each TZ home security systems,
Speaker 1: thieves don't stand a chance to rob you and get
Speaker 1: away with your personal belongings?
Speaker 4: Oh, sir, did you hear what I say?
Speaker 1: Yes, I hear you.
Speaker 4: I don't know.
Speaker 1: Feel good.
Speaker 4: I'm just gonna go all right. I don't want to
Speaker 4: be rude.
Speaker 1: We'll ensure your protection against time.
Speaker 2: Now.
Speaker 4: I realized this, but I really gotta go all right.
Speaker 4: Thank you for your time.
Speaker 1: We have a special offer for you today, sir.
Speaker 4: No, I realize that, but I'm not interested. Hello, this
Speaker 4: is mister.
Speaker 1: Michael Oppenheimer EAHTZ Home Security Systems against sir. Did you
Speaker 1: know that ruin and every four homeowners have had their
Speaker 1: homes and robbed each year?
Speaker 4: Listen, man, I've lived in South Africa, which is one
Speaker 4: of the most dangerous countries in the entire world. I
Speaker 4: don't put of that. With my doors locked, I leave
Speaker 4: my windows open. If somebody wants to rob me, then
Speaker 4: they can come in and rob me. I really don't care.
Speaker 1: Did you know that every eight seconds of burglar bridge
Speaker 1: into another home. Are you aware of this?
Speaker 4: Well, you told me that before, so I'm aware of it.
Speaker 1: One of those eight seconds could be you.
Speaker 4: I'm not purchasing anything. I really have to go.
Speaker 1: Well, we seem to have gotten disconnected. This is mister
Speaker 1: Michael Oppenheimer with HTZ Home Security System.
Speaker 4: I'm actually robbing this house I'm in right now, so
Speaker 4: I'm one of the people that you're going after.
Speaker 1: It, all right.
Speaker 2: Normally the police don't call back, normally harassing me.
Speaker 4: Man, stop calling.
Speaker 2: The first time it was cool because I was very
Speaker 2: relaxed and I said, please don't call back. But this
Speaker 2: is the third time in a row you've called, and
Speaker 2: I don't appreciate it anymore.
Speaker 1: Honestly, you let me finish, sir.
Speaker 4: I don't want to hear what you have to say.
Speaker 2: I'm not interested in home security system. We have a
Speaker 2: limited time, but I don't even own this house. I'm
Speaker 2: not interested. Really, I'm telling you, I already don't feel good,
Speaker 2: and I'm telling you please call my house.
Speaker 1: Do you live in No?
Speaker 2: Do you understand you call the house again, I'm going
Speaker 2: to call the police.
Speaker 1: We'll give you the first month free.
Speaker 4: Though I realized this, no other.
Speaker 1: Security company can come close to this type off fork provide.
Speaker 4: I have to go.
Speaker 2: I'm saying goodbye, and if you call again then we're
Speaker 2: going to have a bit of an issue.
Speaker 1: Hello, this is mister Michael.
Speaker 4: You've said this before.
Speaker 1: So did you know that one in every five I realized.
Speaker 4: That one in every fus Holmes gets robbed every forty
Speaker 4: seconds or whatever you're saying.
Speaker 1: Actually that was the second fact.
Speaker 4: No, no, I know that's the second fact. I don't
Speaker 4: want to hear it anymore.
Speaker 1: Let's eat seconds.
Speaker 4: No, I don't want to hear it anymore. Please stop
Speaker 4: calling my house, sir.
Speaker 1: All we want to do is make your home secure.
Speaker 4: Listen, man, I have to go now.
Speaker 2: I'll talk to you again in like twenty seconds, because
Speaker 2: you're going to call back again in like twenty seconds.
Speaker 1: You're a real comedian, aren't you.
Speaker 4: I'm a comedian. Could I get on a comedy special?
Speaker 1: I could get you on the radio.
Speaker 4: You could get me on the radio.
Speaker 1: You want to meet the president of HTZ Home Security?
Speaker 4: To meet the president of ht Z w H t
Speaker 4: Z f M. You're making this stuff, dude.
Speaker 1: This is scary Jones and you've been phone tapped?
Speaker 4: Are you serious?
Speaker 2: But your mom you must be joking?
Speaker 4: No way, man, My grandfather.
Speaker 2: He just said to me, it's probably those crazy people
Speaker 2: from the radio. Elvis Duran's phone