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Speaker 1: Don't answer the phone.

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Speaker 2: Elvis durand Elvis Duran's phone tap.

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Speaker 3: Michael Oppenheimer strikes again. Dear Elvis, my son Milo gets

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Speaker 3: crazy when telemarketers call the house. Huh mean Milo's been

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Speaker 3: away for a while, so he's not familiar with Michael Oppenheimer.

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Speaker 3: He won't recognize the voice, and Michael Oppenheimer's relentless sales

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Speaker 3: pitches will drive Milo nuts. Please phone tap him. He's

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Speaker 3: a crazy, wild guy. As you'll hear, he's gonna fall

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Speaker 3: for a big time.

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Speaker 1: All right.

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Speaker 3: This is a phone tap done by Milo's mother Cheryl

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Speaker 3: and Milo's sister Nina. All right, Scary's gonna play the

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Speaker 3: part of Michael Oppenheimer selling alarm systems to Milo.

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Speaker 1: Shall we listen in little Hello, good afternoon. This is

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Speaker 1: mister Michael Oppenheimer with HT and Z home security systems.

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Speaker 1: How are you doing today, sir?

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Speaker 4: Uh? Not too good to right now?

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Speaker 1: Oh yeah? Well did you know that one in every

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Speaker 1: four homeowners have had their home robbed each year?

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Speaker 4: I didn't know that. I'm sorry? Can I go because

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Speaker 4: I really don't feel good?

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Speaker 1: Did you know that every eight seconds of burglar breaks

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Speaker 1: into another home?

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Speaker 4: I'm sorry? I don't mean to be rude, sir, but

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Speaker 4: I really gotta go right.

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Speaker 1: Did you know that with each TZ home security systems,

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Speaker 1: thieves don't stand a chance to rob you and get

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Speaker 1: away with your personal belongings?

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Speaker 4: Oh, sir, did you hear what I say?

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Speaker 1: Yes, I hear you.

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Speaker 4: I don't know.

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Speaker 1: Feel good.

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Speaker 4: I'm just gonna go all right. I don't want to

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Speaker 4: be rude.

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Speaker 1: We'll ensure your protection against time.

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Speaker 2: Now.

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Speaker 4: I realized this, but I really gotta go all right.

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Speaker 4: Thank you for your time.

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Speaker 1: We have a special offer for you today, sir.

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Speaker 4: No, I realize that, but I'm not interested. Hello, this

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Speaker 4: is mister.

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Speaker 1: Michael Oppenheimer EAHTZ Home Security Systems against sir. Did you

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Speaker 1: know that ruin and every four homeowners have had their

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Speaker 1: homes and robbed each year?

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Speaker 4: Listen, man, I've lived in South Africa, which is one

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Speaker 4: of the most dangerous countries in the entire world. I

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Speaker 4: don't put of that. With my doors locked, I leave

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Speaker 4: my windows open. If somebody wants to rob me, then

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Speaker 4: they can come in and rob me. I really don't care.

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Speaker 1: Did you know that every eight seconds of burglar bridge

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Speaker 1: into another home. Are you aware of this?

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Speaker 4: Well, you told me that before, so I'm aware of it.

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Speaker 1: One of those eight seconds could be you.

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Speaker 4: I'm not purchasing anything. I really have to go.

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Speaker 1: Well, we seem to have gotten disconnected. This is mister

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Speaker 1: Michael Oppenheimer with HTZ Home Security System.

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Speaker 4: I'm actually robbing this house I'm in right now, so

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Speaker 4: I'm one of the people that you're going after.

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Speaker 1: It, all right.

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Speaker 2: Normally the police don't call back, normally harassing me.

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Speaker 4: Man, stop calling.

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Speaker 2: The first time it was cool because I was very

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Speaker 2: relaxed and I said, please don't call back. But this

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Speaker 2: is the third time in a row you've called, and

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Speaker 2: I don't appreciate it anymore.

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Speaker 1: Honestly, you let me finish, sir.

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Speaker 4: I don't want to hear what you have to say.

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Speaker 2: I'm not interested in home security system. We have a

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Speaker 2: limited time, but I don't even own this house. I'm

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Speaker 2: not interested. Really, I'm telling you, I already don't feel good,

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Speaker 2: and I'm telling you please call my house.

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Speaker 1: Do you live in No?

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Speaker 2: Do you understand you call the house again, I'm going

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Speaker 2: to call the police.

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Speaker 1: We'll give you the first month free.

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Speaker 4: Though I realized this, no other.

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Speaker 1: Security company can come close to this type off fork provide.

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Speaker 4: I have to go.

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Speaker 2: I'm saying goodbye, and if you call again then we're

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Speaker 2: going to have a bit of an issue.

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Speaker 1: Hello, this is mister Michael.

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Speaker 4: You've said this before.

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Speaker 1: So did you know that one in every five I realized.

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Speaker 4: That one in every fus Holmes gets robbed every forty

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Speaker 4: seconds or whatever you're saying.

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Speaker 1: Actually that was the second fact.

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Speaker 4: No, no, I know that's the second fact. I don't

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Speaker 4: want to hear it anymore.

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Speaker 1: Let's eat seconds.

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Speaker 4: No, I don't want to hear it anymore. Please stop

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Speaker 4: calling my house, sir.

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Speaker 1: All we want to do is make your home secure.

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Speaker 4: Listen, man, I have to go now.

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Speaker 2: I'll talk to you again in like twenty seconds, because

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Speaker 2: you're going to call back again in like twenty seconds.

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Speaker 1: You're a real comedian, aren't you.

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Speaker 4: I'm a comedian. Could I get on a comedy special?

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Speaker 1: I could get you on the radio.

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Speaker 4: You could get me on the radio.

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Speaker 1: You want to meet the president of HTZ Home Security?

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Speaker 4: To meet the president of ht Z w H t

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Speaker 4: Z f M. You're making this stuff, dude.

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Speaker 1: This is scary Jones and you've been phone tapped?

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Speaker 4: Are you serious?

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Speaker 2: But your mom you must be joking?

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Speaker 4: No way, man, My grandfather.

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Speaker 2: He just said to me, it's probably those crazy people

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Speaker 2: from the radio. Elvis Duran's phone