1 00:00:04,795 --> 00:00:25,035 Speaker 1: Countdown with Keith Olderman is a production of iHeartRadio. Musk 2 00:00:25,435 --> 00:00:30,515 Speaker 1: has attacked Trump. Musk had already ghosted Trump. Now Musk 3 00:00:30,675 --> 00:00:34,435 Speaker 1: is attacking Trump. At this point it is still passive aggressive, 4 00:00:34,715 --> 00:00:39,075 Speaker 1: but it is unmistakable an attack by Musk on Trump. 5 00:00:40,195 --> 00:00:43,515 Speaker 1: How is that possible? Who could have ever foreseen that? 6 00:00:43,595 --> 00:00:49,755 Speaker 1: Relying on a chemicaled up, psychologically impaired, persistently overpromising, compulsive 7 00:00:49,995 --> 00:00:52,955 Speaker 1: sperm donor who may have been the victim of a 8 00:00:53,035 --> 00:00:56,755 Speaker 1: botched penile implant. Who could have ever foreseen that could 9 00:00:56,755 --> 00:01:00,555 Speaker 1: be a bad thing? But he's exactly like my oldest son. 10 00:01:02,195 --> 00:01:06,795 Speaker 1: Musk has ghosted Trump. More importantly, Musk's money is going 11 00:01:06,795 --> 00:01:10,235 Speaker 1: to ghost Trump and bluntly, without Musk's money two hundred 12 00:01:10,235 --> 00:01:12,355 Speaker 1: and seventy five million dollars in the election, thank you 13 00:01:12,395 --> 00:01:17,115 Speaker 1: Citizens United and Floyd Abrams. Without Musk's money and musks 14 00:01:17,235 --> 00:01:20,395 Speaker 1: tech bro vote and musks we'll be on maus next 15 00:01:20,395 --> 00:01:25,315 Speaker 1: week vote and Musk's white supremacist apartheid vote, Trump probably loses. 16 00:01:26,115 --> 00:01:30,795 Speaker 1: Musk has ghosted Trump and is starting to attack Trump, 17 00:01:31,635 --> 00:01:35,595 Speaker 1: and Trump can't say a word because unless Musk bank 18 00:01:35,715 --> 00:01:38,195 Speaker 1: rolls it, Trump will not be able to subvert the 19 00:01:38,275 --> 00:01:42,115 Speaker 1: Constitution and run for a third term. And unless Musk 20 00:01:42,235 --> 00:01:45,275 Speaker 1: bank rolls it, a Trump successor will never get off 21 00:01:45,275 --> 00:01:48,595 Speaker 1: the ground. And unless Musk bank rolls it, the Republicans 22 00:01:48,595 --> 00:01:50,755 Speaker 1: will lose the House next year and maybe the Senate too. 23 00:01:51,275 --> 00:01:55,075 Speaker 1: All Trump has been able to do thus far is 24 00:01:55,155 --> 00:02:01,115 Speaker 1: the really sad site of publishing without comment. A screenshot 25 00:02:01,835 --> 00:02:06,435 Speaker 1: of a Musk tweet thanking and praising Trump, and the 26 00:02:06,475 --> 00:02:12,395 Speaker 1: tweet is from May twenty eighth. Musk's response was to 27 00:02:12,435 --> 00:02:15,795 Speaker 1: pin to his feed a tweet from an expert. It's 28 00:02:15,835 --> 00:02:18,075 Speaker 1: from a woman in Vegas who shows herself in a 29 00:02:18,115 --> 00:02:24,035 Speaker 1: string bikini grilling burgers. So next Trump Supreme Court justice nominee. 30 00:02:24,115 --> 00:02:27,755 Speaker 1: It encourages conservatives to go to the comment sections at 31 00:02:27,795 --> 00:02:33,275 Speaker 1: Fox News and quoting this magic chef. Almost every comment 32 00:02:33,515 --> 00:02:37,635 Speaker 1: is in agreement with Elon. To see so many vehemently 33 00:02:37,675 --> 00:02:44,355 Speaker 1: disagreeing with Trump is wild. Then there are screenshots, screenshots 34 00:02:44,395 --> 00:02:49,835 Speaker 1: of comments, not burgers or buns. It is a passive 35 00:02:50,035 --> 00:02:54,955 Speaker 1: aggressive attack on Trump by Musk. Ya a second party 36 00:02:55,715 --> 00:03:00,915 Speaker 1: with burgers and buns and screenshots. But make no mistake, 37 00:03:01,155 --> 00:03:10,315 Speaker 1: it's an attack and this is the best part. Trump 38 00:03:10,395 --> 00:03:14,795 Speaker 1: cannot trash Musk in return as much as he wants to, 39 00:03:14,875 --> 00:03:18,395 Speaker 1: no doubt, as much as Musk attacks the House for 40 00:03:18,515 --> 00:03:20,835 Speaker 1: Trump's budget bill and it's two point four trillion dollar 41 00:03:20,955 --> 00:03:24,795 Speaker 1: add to the deficit without mentioning Trump, even though it's 42 00:03:24,835 --> 00:03:27,515 Speaker 1: Trump's bill and those idiots in the House like Mike 43 00:03:27,595 --> 00:03:31,195 Speaker 1: Johnson are just Trump's slaves, as much as Musk is 44 00:03:31,235 --> 00:03:35,875 Speaker 1: still protecting Trump from himself. In this manner, Trump has 45 00:03:35,955 --> 00:03:38,835 Speaker 1: to do the most difficult thing in the world for him. 46 00:03:39,395 --> 00:03:46,555 Speaker 1: Shut himself up, keep his mouth closed and his fingers 47 00:03:46,875 --> 00:03:53,275 Speaker 1: off the phone. Trump may yet snap, he may lash 48 00:03:53,315 --> 00:03:56,235 Speaker 1: out at Musk. Lord knows, there's never been anybody else 49 00:03:56,355 --> 00:04:00,355 Speaker 1: Trump has ever been betrayed by, or even insufficiently supported by, 50 00:04:00,595 --> 00:04:03,955 Speaker 1: that he hasn't lashed out at. But strategically, the entirety 51 00:04:03,995 --> 00:04:07,555 Speaker 1: of Trump World has got to be focusing itself on 52 00:04:07,755 --> 00:04:12,195 Speaker 1: pouring fresh buckets of ice water over Trump every twenty minutes, 53 00:04:12,235 --> 00:04:16,955 Speaker 1: because if he comes back at Musk, Maga is suddenly broke. 54 00:04:19,155 --> 00:04:23,755 Speaker 1: Trump is already facing Musk's Trumpean barrage of tweets the 55 00:04:23,835 --> 00:04:27,235 Speaker 1: other night, thirteen of them, about as many yesterday afternoon, 56 00:04:27,595 --> 00:04:30,475 Speaker 1: demanding that America vote out all the congressmen who voted 57 00:04:30,475 --> 00:04:33,675 Speaker 1: for the budget bill, and guess who they are. They're Republicans. 58 00:04:34,355 --> 00:04:36,995 Speaker 1: Shame on those who voted for it. You know you 59 00:04:37,115 --> 00:04:40,875 Speaker 1: did wrong. Fire all politicians who betrayed the American people, 60 00:04:42,115 --> 00:04:47,035 Speaker 1: and the memes of kill the bill. Despite what The 61 00:04:47,075 --> 00:04:49,475 Speaker 1: New York Times posited the other night, the Democrats don't 62 00:04:49,475 --> 00:04:54,115 Speaker 1: have to consider taking Musk back, whatever that means. Musk 63 00:04:54,275 --> 00:04:56,355 Speaker 1: just did all we could ever ask for him. He 64 00:04:56,515 --> 00:05:01,155 Speaker 1: just endorsed every Democratic congressional candidate, and before that, he 65 00:05:01,235 --> 00:05:04,635 Speaker 1: endorsed every potential primary of every sitting Republican house member. 66 00:05:04,915 --> 00:05:08,355 Speaker 1: And we haven't even gotten to the Senate yet. Musk 67 00:05:08,955 --> 00:05:12,915 Speaker 1: just this week doubled the cost of electing Republicans next 68 00:05:12,995 --> 00:05:19,275 Speaker 1: year and shut off his own money spigot. And if 69 00:05:19,315 --> 00:05:23,715 Speaker 1: you're wondering about the principles involved, these are not complex 70 00:05:23,795 --> 00:05:27,955 Speaker 1: matters of finance or deficit as a percentage of GDP, 71 00:05:28,235 --> 00:05:32,595 Speaker 1: or the sustainability of the debt sealing system. It's simple. 72 00:05:32,915 --> 00:05:36,955 Speaker 1: The rich, and especially the especially rich, all eventually see 73 00:05:36,995 --> 00:05:40,995 Speaker 1: their lives ruined by the same monomania. The more money 74 00:05:40,995 --> 00:05:43,475 Speaker 1: they make, the more time they waste, and the more 75 00:05:43,555 --> 00:05:47,435 Speaker 1: pain they feel at having to give any of that 76 00:05:47,595 --> 00:05:54,755 Speaker 1: money to anybody else, especially as part of taxes, especially 77 00:05:54,835 --> 00:06:01,235 Speaker 1: as part of some kind of responsibility delio about mankind, 78 00:06:02,075 --> 00:06:05,435 Speaker 1: where mankind asks for like a dollar dollar back for 79 00:06:05,475 --> 00:06:09,995 Speaker 1: every million, these guys get to keep money. It's all 80 00:06:10,075 --> 00:06:13,675 Speaker 1: Musk is, it's all Trump is, it's all Scott besson is, 81 00:06:14,075 --> 00:06:16,955 Speaker 1: It's all all of them are. This is about them 82 00:06:16,995 --> 00:06:22,795 Speaker 1: paying less taxes because at trillion dollars is not going 83 00:06:22,835 --> 00:06:28,155 Speaker 1: as far as it used to anyway. Thanks ghosting, Elmo, 84 00:06:28,715 --> 00:06:32,635 Speaker 1: Thanks passive aggressive Elmo for kneeing Trump in the groin. 85 00:06:32,675 --> 00:06:34,275 Speaker 1: And we will get back to you if we need 86 00:06:34,315 --> 00:06:36,795 Speaker 1: you at any of the Democratic events. Who in the 87 00:06:36,835 --> 00:06:41,355 Speaker 1: hell am I kidding? Musk has also and more obviously 88 00:06:41,395 --> 00:06:45,515 Speaker 1: ghosted the Republican Party in whole, especially the House Republicans. 89 00:06:45,515 --> 00:06:48,675 Speaker 1: But the real issue is Trump who. And remember the 90 00:06:48,755 --> 00:06:50,715 Speaker 1: quote is in the Wall Street Journal from the very 91 00:06:50,795 --> 00:06:54,035 Speaker 1: same White House officials who got Trump to chase Musk 92 00:06:54,155 --> 00:06:57,915 Speaker 1: out in the first place. Trump, who finally realized the 93 00:06:57,955 --> 00:07:01,275 Speaker 1: eleven dy trillion in cuts Musk promise was another one 94 00:07:01,275 --> 00:07:05,755 Speaker 1: of Musk's hallucinations, his most vivid fantasies from his most 95 00:07:05,755 --> 00:07:11,115 Speaker 1: profound fugue states. Trump finally asked was it all bullshit? 96 00:07:12,915 --> 00:07:17,515 Speaker 1: Oh my yes, you mean even you were too disconnected 97 00:07:17,515 --> 00:07:21,475 Speaker 1: to realize it was all bullshit, that it was bullshit, 98 00:07:21,515 --> 00:07:25,035 Speaker 1: that it was all bullshit, that everything Musk says is bullshit. 99 00:07:26,795 --> 00:07:30,835 Speaker 1: The new reporting on this is limited and controlled. The 100 00:07:31,035 --> 00:07:35,795 Speaker 1: leak to its stenographer at Politico, dash of Burns is quote, 101 00:07:36,035 --> 00:07:41,075 Speaker 1: the West Wing is perplexed, unenthused, and disappointed. You bet 102 00:07:41,155 --> 00:07:46,675 Speaker 1: your ass and over on Capitol Hill. Why Mike Johnson 103 00:07:46,755 --> 00:07:50,595 Speaker 1: is in shock that Lyle Lanley didn't return his calls 104 00:07:50,635 --> 00:07:53,675 Speaker 1: about the new Springfield mono rail. Well, I'll tell you. 105 00:07:53,675 --> 00:07:55,635 Speaker 2: I called Elon last night and then answered it. But 106 00:07:56,515 --> 00:07:58,155 Speaker 2: I hope to talk to him today. I mean, it's 107 00:07:58,195 --> 00:08:01,235 Speaker 2: not you know, it's very friendly and we and we've 108 00:08:01,315 --> 00:08:05,235 Speaker 2: laughed about our differences on policy before we'll disclosure. Elan 109 00:08:05,275 --> 00:08:07,155 Speaker 2: and I had a great conversation about a half hour 110 00:08:07,195 --> 00:08:11,675 Speaker 2: long talk on Monday this week, Monday morning, and we 111 00:08:11,715 --> 00:08:13,795 Speaker 2: talked about the big Beautiful bill because he made he 112 00:08:14,195 --> 00:08:15,515 Speaker 2: I think he was trying to make a joke a 113 00:08:15,595 --> 00:08:17,675 Speaker 2: couple of days earlier. It can't be big and beautiful, 114 00:08:17,675 --> 00:08:19,955 Speaker 2: And I started the conversation, Oh yes it can, my friend, 115 00:08:19,955 --> 00:08:22,115 Speaker 2: It's very beautiful. I talked to President Trump, you know, 116 00:08:22,275 --> 00:08:25,715 Speaker 2: all the time, multiple times a day. Obviously we've talked 117 00:08:25,715 --> 00:08:28,795 Speaker 2: about this. He's as you know, he's not He's not 118 00:08:28,875 --> 00:08:31,435 Speaker 2: delighted that Elon did a one to eighty on that. 119 00:08:31,595 --> 00:08:34,755 Speaker 2: But look, I don't know what happened. 120 00:08:34,515 --> 00:08:35,115 Speaker 3: In twenty four hours. 121 00:08:35,275 --> 00:08:38,195 Speaker 2: Everybody can draw their own conclusions about that, okay, But 122 00:08:38,235 --> 00:08:39,915 Speaker 2: I look forward to talking to my friend about it again, 123 00:08:39,915 --> 00:08:41,755 Speaker 2: and I'm not upset about it. 124 00:08:41,755 --> 00:08:47,515 Speaker 1: All right, Mike, you fed up, you trusted musk. By 125 00:08:47,555 --> 00:08:52,155 Speaker 1: the way, Mike Johnson talks and sounds like a guy 126 00:08:52,555 --> 00:08:56,275 Speaker 1: who should be saying, well, traffic is backed up throughout 127 00:08:56,315 --> 00:09:01,875 Speaker 1: the corridor after that explosion at the rhubarb factory. Now 128 00:09:02,875 --> 00:09:33,395 Speaker 1: here are the Statler brothers. And I love the Statler brothers. 129 00:09:33,835 --> 00:09:37,995 Speaker 1: Got then, King, don't tell me some other headlines. Trump 130 00:09:38,035 --> 00:09:41,555 Speaker 1: says he's talked to Putin for ninety minutes, largely about Ukraine, 131 00:09:41,555 --> 00:09:44,275 Speaker 1: says Putin has says he will now have to avenge 132 00:09:44,315 --> 00:09:46,875 Speaker 1: the Ukrainian tax on air bases in Russia. Oh no, 133 00:09:46,955 --> 00:09:51,835 Speaker 1: what's he gonna do, Donnie start bombing Ukrainian civilians. Trump 134 00:09:51,875 --> 00:09:57,155 Speaker 1: is an utter fool, a Russian simp. Never mind whether 135 00:09:57,195 --> 00:10:00,515 Speaker 1: Putin or Zelenski wants peace. If Trump wanted peace, he 136 00:10:00,595 --> 00:10:03,875 Speaker 1: should be right now congratulating Ukraine on the best incursion 137 00:10:03,915 --> 00:10:08,675 Speaker 1: into Russias Napoleon reached Moscow. He should be saying, Look, 138 00:10:08,715 --> 00:10:14,115 Speaker 1: if Russia wants peace, this is simple. Remove Putin. Trump 139 00:10:14,115 --> 00:10:18,715 Speaker 1: has also attacked Columbia University again. Do you see what 140 00:10:18,955 --> 00:10:22,995 Speaker 1: happens when you try to appease He is now trying 141 00:10:22,995 --> 00:10:29,355 Speaker 1: to get its accreditation removed, alleging discriminatory admission policies, trying 142 00:10:29,395 --> 00:10:32,555 Speaker 1: to turn it into not a university. It is not 143 00:10:32,755 --> 00:10:38,995 Speaker 1: too late, Claire, kill your deal. Sue him for one 144 00:10:39,075 --> 00:10:46,195 Speaker 1: hundred trillion dollars. Carl Harvard, Trump's guy in charge of 145 00:10:46,235 --> 00:10:49,115 Speaker 1: pardoning those who tried to overthrow democracy for him, has 146 00:10:49,155 --> 00:10:53,275 Speaker 1: a new target. He wants to pardon the fake electors. 147 00:10:53,955 --> 00:10:57,675 Speaker 1: The written analysis of the May Outlook for US agricultural 148 00:10:57,755 --> 00:11:00,075 Speaker 1: trade from the US Department of Agriculture was ready to 149 00:11:00,115 --> 00:11:03,435 Speaker 1: go on May twenty ninth, but it predicted an increase 150 00:11:03,515 --> 00:11:07,395 Speaker 1: in the nation's farm goods trade deficit to a record 151 00:11:07,435 --> 00:11:11,195 Speaker 1: no last forty nine billion. We can't have that, so 152 00:11:11,315 --> 00:11:15,795 Speaker 1: Trump didn't release the written part. A redacted version was 153 00:11:15,835 --> 00:11:19,915 Speaker 1: released Monday, of this week, no written part, the part 154 00:11:19,915 --> 00:11:22,915 Speaker 1: with the trade deficit still has not been released because, 155 00:11:23,115 --> 00:11:28,675 Speaker 1: says a USDA spokesman, it's undergoing internal review by Winston Smith, 156 00:11:29,715 --> 00:11:32,315 Speaker 1: you know six zero seven nine Smith w at the 157 00:11:32,355 --> 00:11:40,475 Speaker 1: Ministry of Truth. Smith six oh seven nine will also 158 00:11:40,555 --> 00:11:43,795 Speaker 1: be looking at the Florida meteorologists who apologize to his 159 00:11:43,875 --> 00:11:46,235 Speaker 1: viewers the other day because he would not be able 160 00:11:46,235 --> 00:11:48,995 Speaker 1: to warn them anymore about hurricanes because the government isn't 161 00:11:49,035 --> 00:11:53,315 Speaker 1: telling anybody what it knows about hurricanes. So good luck 162 00:11:53,395 --> 00:11:58,155 Speaker 1: Florida and the Office of Management and Budget. Where the 163 00:11:58,195 --> 00:12:02,675 Speaker 1: evil moron behind Project twenty twenty five, the ironically named 164 00:12:02,755 --> 00:12:07,315 Speaker 1: RUSS Vote high. It is boasting on social media about 165 00:12:07,315 --> 00:12:10,595 Speaker 1: the money it has cut from PBS and you know, 166 00:12:11,315 --> 00:12:16,675 Speaker 1: keeping American kids from starving and quote four million dollars 167 00:12:16,875 --> 00:12:23,555 Speaker 1: saved for Lagome Systems research. It helpfully attached a photo 168 00:12:23,675 --> 00:12:31,715 Speaker 1: of six or seven types of legomes beans Legome Systems research. Oh, 169 00:12:31,755 --> 00:12:36,635 Speaker 1: what's that sounds French? It's how to breed healthier and 170 00:12:36,675 --> 00:12:42,515 Speaker 1: more durable beans and other innovations and also improving upon 171 00:12:42,635 --> 00:12:46,875 Speaker 1: some past innovations like from seven thousand years ago. One 172 00:12:46,875 --> 00:12:52,075 Speaker 1: of them was called corrop rotation. We are deliberately destroying 173 00:12:52,195 --> 00:12:56,755 Speaker 1: knowledge so that Trump will not be so stupid compared 174 00:12:56,795 --> 00:13:01,475 Speaker 1: to everybody else. And by the way, he is complaining 175 00:13:01,515 --> 00:13:05,115 Speaker 1: now internally according to several reports about a the Supreme 176 00:13:05,235 --> 00:13:08,235 Speaker 1: Court justice, he does not like who he thinks is weak, 177 00:13:08,475 --> 00:13:14,075 Speaker 1: thinks is not upholding his agenda. Catanji Brown, Jackson, so 178 00:13:14,195 --> 00:13:23,595 Speaker 1: tom Ore, Noop, Amy Coney, Barrett, Okay, who's gonna break 179 00:13:23,635 --> 00:13:37,675 Speaker 1: it to him now? Story time, Nearly four decades ago, 180 00:13:37,755 --> 00:13:40,195 Speaker 1: I was preparing to get back into television after a 181 00:13:40,235 --> 00:13:42,675 Speaker 1: long hiatus taking care of my family. And I'm gonna 182 00:13:42,755 --> 00:13:45,755 Speaker 1: leave the details of this out, which is too bad 183 00:13:45,755 --> 00:13:48,235 Speaker 1: in one way, because my gratitude to the news director 184 00:13:48,515 --> 00:13:50,595 Speaker 1: who took a chance on me all those years ago 185 00:13:50,755 --> 00:13:54,635 Speaker 1: is endless and boundless, and I always think of him 186 00:13:54,635 --> 00:13:55,955 Speaker 1: at this time of the year because it happened at 187 00:13:55,955 --> 00:14:00,595 Speaker 1: this time of year. But there was one drawback to 188 00:14:00,675 --> 00:14:04,475 Speaker 1: the job, and it is relevant to our current political system. 189 00:14:05,475 --> 00:14:08,875 Speaker 1: The one drawback was hinted at to me by members 190 00:14:08,915 --> 00:14:12,195 Speaker 1: of the sports department at this TV station long before 191 00:14:12,235 --> 00:14:15,395 Speaker 1: I even signed the contract. The station had another sportscaster 192 00:14:15,995 --> 00:14:20,915 Speaker 1: he did the weekends, who's described to me not just 193 00:14:21,035 --> 00:14:24,075 Speaker 1: as the dumbest person any of them there had ever met, 194 00:14:24,355 --> 00:14:27,195 Speaker 1: but very possibly the dumbest person who had ever lived. 195 00:14:28,395 --> 00:14:32,395 Speaker 1: We eventually fired him after he mispronounced the same hockey 196 00:14:32,475 --> 00:14:36,315 Speaker 1: name thirty one weeks in a row. Then after he 197 00:14:36,355 --> 00:14:39,635 Speaker 1: tried to sneak some woman into a team's press box 198 00:14:40,595 --> 00:14:43,555 Speaker 1: and decided the best place to stash her was the 199 00:14:43,595 --> 00:14:46,075 Speaker 1: seat that in fact belonged to the general manager of 200 00:14:46,155 --> 00:14:48,555 Speaker 1: that team, And they then refused to give him any 201 00:14:48,555 --> 00:14:52,475 Speaker 1: more press credentials. And I believe the last I heard 202 00:14:52,475 --> 00:14:55,475 Speaker 1: he had not worked in sports television since. And this 203 00:14:55,755 --> 00:15:00,675 Speaker 1: was like, well again, like four decades ago. He was 204 00:15:00,915 --> 00:15:03,555 Speaker 1: offered another job. I know that after about two years 205 00:15:03,555 --> 00:15:05,755 Speaker 1: of unemployment, a good one, working with a guy who 206 00:15:05,755 --> 00:15:08,155 Speaker 1: did a national sports cast. But the story I heard 207 00:15:08,315 --> 00:15:10,955 Speaker 1: was as they were about to draw up the contract 208 00:15:10,995 --> 00:15:13,635 Speaker 1: and they were congratulating him on getting the job. He 209 00:15:13,755 --> 00:15:16,035 Speaker 1: had a good voice, and he looked like a Greek god, 210 00:15:16,115 --> 00:15:18,995 Speaker 1: and he fits suits really well. He said, oh, by 211 00:15:18,995 --> 00:15:21,035 Speaker 1: the way, I never fly business class. It has to 212 00:15:21,075 --> 00:15:25,915 Speaker 1: be first. And they said, well, the guy who does 213 00:15:26,235 --> 00:15:29,475 Speaker 1: this national sports cast you'll be working with, he doesn't 214 00:15:29,555 --> 00:15:32,635 Speaker 1: even fly first. And this guy shrugged and I guess 215 00:15:32,675 --> 00:15:36,395 Speaker 1: he's somewhere now, still waiting for them to send him 216 00:15:36,395 --> 00:15:42,355 Speaker 1: the contract with the first class airfare guarantee in it. Anyway, 217 00:15:42,835 --> 00:15:45,595 Speaker 1: the point he was on the air one night with 218 00:15:45,715 --> 00:15:48,555 Speaker 1: the fellow who preceded me as the sports director of 219 00:15:48,595 --> 00:15:53,395 Speaker 1: this station, and my predecessor was live from Chicago, and 220 00:15:53,435 --> 00:15:57,115 Speaker 1: as they wrapped up the segment, the dumb guy asks 221 00:15:57,195 --> 00:15:58,995 Speaker 1: my predecessor, by the way, do you have a good 222 00:15:59,035 --> 00:16:04,235 Speaker 1: view of the ocean from your hotel. My predecessor realizes 223 00:16:04,515 --> 00:16:08,155 Speaker 1: he's not joking, he's serious, and he looks at him 224 00:16:08,195 --> 00:16:13,235 Speaker 1: like huh, And finally he says, oh, the lake, Lake Michigan. 225 00:16:13,515 --> 00:16:15,235 Speaker 1: You mean, do I have a good view of the 226 00:16:15,395 --> 00:16:18,795 Speaker 1: lake from my hotel? And the guy back in the studio, 227 00:16:18,875 --> 00:16:22,755 Speaker 1: the dumb one says, yeah, the ocean, Lake Michigan. Ocean, 228 00:16:22,875 --> 00:16:29,515 Speaker 1: Lake Michigan. I mention him, and I'm going to pretend 229 00:16:29,515 --> 00:16:32,675 Speaker 1: I've forgotten his name, even though when we fired him, 230 00:16:32,675 --> 00:16:37,035 Speaker 1: the entire sports department came in to the office, many 231 00:16:37,035 --> 00:16:41,755 Speaker 1: of them on their nights off, for a party highlighted 232 00:16:41,795 --> 00:16:43,955 Speaker 1: by the moment at which we went outside and painted 233 00:16:44,035 --> 00:16:48,315 Speaker 1: over his name on his parking spot, and a mighty 234 00:16:48,475 --> 00:16:51,915 Speaker 1: roar went up from the crowd, and I mention him 235 00:16:51,915 --> 00:16:55,275 Speaker 1: at length because every time I read another story about 236 00:16:55,315 --> 00:16:58,435 Speaker 1: Trump and this group of absolute idiots he has picked 237 00:16:58,435 --> 00:17:02,075 Speaker 1: to run this country into the ground, I think of 238 00:17:02,155 --> 00:17:06,275 Speaker 1: that weekend sportscaster, and I keep waiting to hear he's 239 00:17:06,315 --> 00:17:12,475 Speaker 1: been nominated as Secretary of Geography or the head of 240 00:17:12,515 --> 00:17:16,635 Speaker 1: the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration that isn't supplying the 241 00:17:16,675 --> 00:17:19,915 Speaker 1: hurricane reports anymore, or he's been elected senator from somewhere, 242 00:17:19,915 --> 00:17:26,755 Speaker 1: because these people may actually be dumber than he was. 243 00:17:29,315 --> 00:17:32,435 Speaker 1: What you will hear first is Senator Mark Wayne Mullen 244 00:17:32,555 --> 00:17:39,355 Speaker 1: of Oklahoma. Mark Wayne one word dropped out of Missouri 245 00:17:39,475 --> 00:17:45,275 Speaker 1: Valley College, but later got an associate degree in construction 246 00:17:45,435 --> 00:17:50,515 Speaker 1: technology from Oklahoma State University Institute of Technology. And I'm 247 00:17:50,515 --> 00:17:54,035 Speaker 1: not trying to demean construction. My dad's architectural career was 248 00:17:54,075 --> 00:18:00,115 Speaker 1: intertwined with it. But that's that's some academic resume item 249 00:18:00,195 --> 00:18:02,875 Speaker 1: for a guy who you will hear trying to complain 250 00:18:03,355 --> 00:18:07,195 Speaker 1: to the Secretary of Lack of Education Linda McMahon about 251 00:18:07,195 --> 00:18:10,835 Speaker 1: how academic standards have fallen in this country, but doesn't 252 00:18:10,915 --> 00:18:15,595 Speaker 1: know the difference between the words was and were twice, 253 00:18:16,435 --> 00:18:18,555 Speaker 1: He shows he does not know the difference between was 254 00:18:19,115 --> 00:18:21,675 Speaker 1: and were. What was we ranked in reading and math 255 00:18:21,715 --> 00:18:22,715 Speaker 1: in nineteen seventy nine? 256 00:18:23,395 --> 00:18:23,835 Speaker 3: I'm sorry? 257 00:18:23,875 --> 00:18:27,715 Speaker 1: What what was we ranked nationally in math and in 258 00:18:27,755 --> 00:18:29,115 Speaker 1: reading in nineteen seventy nine? 259 00:18:29,315 --> 00:18:30,995 Speaker 3: We were very very low on the totem pole. 260 00:18:31,075 --> 00:18:41,115 Speaker 1: We're number one in nineteen seventy nine? What was we ranked? Senator? 261 00:18:42,075 --> 00:18:45,955 Speaker 1: If you wanted to emphasize educational deterioration, you could have 262 00:18:46,115 --> 00:18:50,475 Speaker 1: just held up a picture of yourself. If you notice, 263 00:18:50,475 --> 00:18:54,315 Speaker 1: he also got the word nationally wrong, he meant internationally. 264 00:18:55,035 --> 00:19:02,115 Speaker 1: Doesn't know the difference, Mark Queen. The look on the 265 00:19:02,155 --> 00:19:07,315 Speaker 1: face of Linda McMahon, who infamously said that the acronym 266 00:19:07,355 --> 00:19:11,515 Speaker 1: for artificial intelligence was pronounced A one. That look was 267 00:19:11,715 --> 00:19:16,395 Speaker 1: almost ineffable. It may have been produced by her realization that, 268 00:19:16,435 --> 00:19:20,515 Speaker 1: for the first time ever, she was not the stupidest 269 00:19:20,595 --> 00:19:28,475 Speaker 1: person in the room. After Senator, associate degree in construction Tech, 270 00:19:29,635 --> 00:19:33,275 Speaker 1: I give you the endless fountain of stupidity and falsehoods. 271 00:19:33,275 --> 00:19:36,995 Speaker 1: That is the press secretary with the word lie contained 272 00:19:36,995 --> 00:19:41,475 Speaker 1: in both her first and last names. The centerfielder from 273 00:19:41,515 --> 00:19:47,155 Speaker 1: a Division three softball program, Caroline Levitt. 274 00:19:47,875 --> 00:19:51,355 Speaker 4: President Chump sounded the alarm over these reckless Biden policies 275 00:19:51,395 --> 00:19:54,595 Speaker 4: for years. Law and order is back in America under 276 00:19:54,635 --> 00:19:58,435 Speaker 4: President Chump. For example, just before Congress enacted the original 277 00:19:58,915 --> 00:19:59,795 Speaker 4: Chump tax cut. 278 00:20:00,035 --> 00:20:03,955 Speaker 1: You heard it, President Chump. I'll play it again in 279 00:20:03,995 --> 00:20:11,635 Speaker 1: a moment, President Chump. Caroline Levitt is not only an 280 00:20:11,675 --> 00:20:15,915 Speaker 1: amazing perpetual motion lying machine, she's rapidly also turning into 281 00:20:15,955 --> 00:20:19,875 Speaker 1: a mispronunciation machine. Let's listen again to it, and then 282 00:20:19,915 --> 00:20:23,995 Speaker 1: connected to her greatest mispronunciation hit when she mispronounced the 283 00:20:24,115 --> 00:20:26,715 Speaker 1: name of Hitler. 284 00:20:27,435 --> 00:20:30,515 Speaker 4: Chump tax cuts at the end of twenty seventeen, Adolf Hilter. 285 00:20:31,155 --> 00:20:40,195 Speaker 1: What was we ranked nationally in ed ucation? Caroline? Is 286 00:20:40,355 --> 00:20:51,475 Speaker 1: it okay if we all compare Chump to Hilter? What 287 00:20:51,675 --> 00:20:55,795 Speaker 1: was the Harry Potter premise where they turned all of 288 00:20:55,835 --> 00:20:59,915 Speaker 1: the people in charge of the government into the stupidest 289 00:20:59,915 --> 00:21:03,875 Speaker 1: people in the world and they all destroyed the government 290 00:21:03,915 --> 00:21:09,475 Speaker 1: by being stupid. But this required, of course, wizards and wands, 291 00:21:09,515 --> 00:21:14,315 Speaker 1: And we don't need wizards and wands. We just find 292 00:21:14,355 --> 00:21:19,835 Speaker 1: the stupidest people in the world and put them in charge. 293 00:21:19,995 --> 00:21:24,555 Speaker 1: But the truth leaks out around the corners President jump, 294 00:21:30,155 --> 00:21:32,275 Speaker 1: do you have a good view of the ocean. Also 295 00:21:32,275 --> 00:21:34,995 Speaker 1: of interest, here the beat goes on. A Fox News 296 00:21:34,995 --> 00:21:39,075 Speaker 1: expert says, the real story in Trump's post about Biden 297 00:21:39,195 --> 00:21:42,715 Speaker 1: being clone executed and turned into a robot is that 298 00:21:42,835 --> 00:21:47,075 Speaker 1: it raises the possibility that during the last administration, the 299 00:21:47,155 --> 00:21:55,835 Speaker 1: nation was run by a cable of unelected officials. You 300 00:21:55,915 --> 00:22:02,915 Speaker 1: heard me, she said, cable that's next. This is Countdown, 301 00:22:05,635 --> 00:22:07,595 Speaker 1: George Carolin. The pleasure to have you here. Thank you. 302 00:22:07,635 --> 00:22:09,755 Speaker 1: This is the best news show ever. I toilet to 303 00:22:09,795 --> 00:22:11,795 Speaker 1: one of your producers, and I want you to know 304 00:22:11,835 --> 00:22:14,915 Speaker 1: that I've seen them all and it's just for especially 305 00:22:14,955 --> 00:22:18,235 Speaker 1: the first thirty five minutes. Thank you. It's just unparalleled. 306 00:22:18,235 --> 00:22:19,835 Speaker 1: I got bad news between you and I. We got 307 00:22:19,875 --> 00:22:21,995 Speaker 1: six minutes to completely screw that in my back. Yeah 308 00:22:21,995 --> 00:22:43,875 Speaker 1: that is good. Hey, if he said that about you 309 00:22:43,955 --> 00:22:47,555 Speaker 1: and your newscast, you'd keep playing it too. Sometimes it 310 00:22:47,675 --> 00:22:51,875 Speaker 1: keeps me going. Doing this podcast is often like gargling, 311 00:22:52,155 --> 00:22:58,435 Speaker 1: flaming chainsaws, indulgement sail ahead on this edition of Countdown. 312 00:22:58,475 --> 00:23:00,195 Speaker 1: I was telling somebody the other day that I think 313 00:23:00,235 --> 00:23:04,835 Speaker 1: I have now met every kind of crazy person in 314 00:23:04,955 --> 00:23:08,315 Speaker 1: media management. I met the drunk who came back from 315 00:23:08,395 --> 00:23:11,955 Speaker 1: lunch drunk one day and drunk fired me, mostly because 316 00:23:11,955 --> 00:23:15,195 Speaker 1: I was twenty one and I wasn't drunk, and they 317 00:23:15,195 --> 00:23:18,715 Speaker 1: wound up reprimanding him for being drunk and apologizing to me. 318 00:23:19,715 --> 00:23:22,035 Speaker 1: I turned down a job with an executive from Madison 319 00:23:22,035 --> 00:23:24,755 Speaker 1: Square Garden, who then decided to try to talk me 320 00:23:24,835 --> 00:23:28,715 Speaker 1: out of turning the job down by calling me up 321 00:23:28,715 --> 00:23:31,555 Speaker 1: at my home and swearing at me and threatening me. 322 00:23:32,235 --> 00:23:35,195 Speaker 1: He thought this would encourage me to go work for him. 323 00:23:35,475 --> 00:23:38,995 Speaker 1: But the weirdest of them all, I have decided as 324 00:23:38,995 --> 00:23:44,035 Speaker 1: I approached my half century mark in this business, was 325 00:23:44,115 --> 00:23:48,555 Speaker 1: the head of MSNBC, and he reached his weirdness apex 326 00:23:49,115 --> 00:23:54,555 Speaker 1: twenty one years ago tomorrow, when he wanted to postpone 327 00:23:54,635 --> 00:23:58,875 Speaker 1: the news so he could do an anniversary feature he 328 00:23:58,915 --> 00:24:03,075 Speaker 1: had worked on all week the news he wished to 329 00:24:03,235 --> 00:24:07,795 Speaker 1: postpone that Ronald Reagan had just died. Can't we talk 330 00:24:07,835 --> 00:24:11,115 Speaker 1: about it later? Next? In Things I promised not to tell, 331 00:24:12,195 --> 00:24:14,075 Speaker 1: And this was the guy who chased me around the 332 00:24:14,115 --> 00:24:17,075 Speaker 1: studios one day and threatened to kill me. That wasn't 333 00:24:17,195 --> 00:24:20,195 Speaker 1: nearly as weird as this day, the anniversary of which 334 00:24:20,275 --> 00:24:24,395 Speaker 1: is tomorrow first, believe it or not, there's still more 335 00:24:24,435 --> 00:24:26,835 Speaker 1: new idiots to talk about. The roundup of the mis grants, 336 00:24:26,915 --> 00:24:31,715 Speaker 1: morons and Dunning Kruger effects specimens who constitute today's other 337 00:24:32,595 --> 00:24:40,035 Speaker 1: worst persons in the world The Bronze. Stephen Chung, Trump 338 00:24:40,075 --> 00:24:46,275 Speaker 1: spokesman and resident center of the lowest bar in spokesperson history. Honestly, 339 00:24:46,355 --> 00:24:49,675 Speaker 1: sometimes I think he's a plant. I don't mean a 340 00:24:49,715 --> 00:24:53,075 Speaker 1: Democratic plant. He was planted by Democrats. I sometimes think 341 00:24:53,195 --> 00:24:57,675 Speaker 1: he's a house plant. Chung reposted a viral clip and 342 00:24:57,755 --> 00:25:01,275 Speaker 1: added to it quote must watch. Don't believe the legacy 343 00:25:01,315 --> 00:25:07,995 Speaker 1: media's biased reporting. Americans overwhelmingly support Trump's agenda. The viral 344 00:25:08,035 --> 00:25:11,955 Speaker 1: clip that Chung tweeted to prove that the legacy media 345 00:25:12,035 --> 00:25:14,315 Speaker 1: was biased in its reporting, and you should never listen 346 00:25:14,355 --> 00:25:17,435 Speaker 1: to the legacy media. And the legacy media is biased. 347 00:25:17,475 --> 00:25:19,555 Speaker 1: So don't ever believe a word you see on the 348 00:25:19,595 --> 00:25:22,275 Speaker 1: legacy media. Don't ever do it. It's the legacy media 349 00:25:22,315 --> 00:25:24,955 Speaker 1: there against Trump. The clip he sent it was a 350 00:25:24,995 --> 00:25:28,915 Speaker 1: segment from CNN, which the last time I checked was 351 00:25:28,995 --> 00:25:34,795 Speaker 1: legacy media, even though its legacy is kind of dying. 352 00:25:37,075 --> 00:25:39,955 Speaker 1: The runner up a tie between former New Hampshire Governor 353 00:25:40,075 --> 00:25:44,835 Speaker 1: Chris Sanunu, A Putts, and Abby Phillip, the CNN host 354 00:25:44,955 --> 00:25:48,035 Speaker 1: of the new show Let's Let Republicans Lie for an 355 00:25:48,075 --> 00:25:51,395 Speaker 1: hour hour with Abby Philip, She is now in her 356 00:25:51,435 --> 00:25:54,555 Speaker 1: third year of being in totally over her head. In 357 00:25:54,595 --> 00:25:57,595 Speaker 1: a segment about Trump's insane post in which it was 358 00:25:57,675 --> 00:26:01,675 Speaker 1: clear he was saying Biden had been cloned, then executed, 359 00:26:01,715 --> 00:26:05,795 Speaker 1: then replaced by a robot. In twenty twenty, Sununu, who's 360 00:26:05,835 --> 00:26:09,075 Speaker 1: a Potts, incidentally said that everybody is to blame in 361 00:26:09,115 --> 00:26:13,675 Speaker 1: this and the Democrats boost conspiracy theories to and Abby Phillip, 362 00:26:13,675 --> 00:26:16,235 Speaker 1: who is down to ninety eight thousand viewers in the 363 00:26:16,315 --> 00:26:21,435 Speaker 1: ad demo, then read a tweet by Trump claiming the 364 00:26:21,555 --> 00:26:25,915 Speaker 1: Fake News had photoshopped a photo and thus claimed there 365 00:26:25,995 --> 00:26:29,035 Speaker 1: was a fake Milania or a Milania double or something. 366 00:26:29,115 --> 00:26:33,675 Speaker 1: So it's all the same. Two notes. Who photoshopped the 367 00:26:33,715 --> 00:26:37,195 Speaker 1: photo of Milania? Abby? Was that Biden who did that? 368 00:26:37,555 --> 00:26:41,035 Speaker 1: Or Kamala or somebody who worked for them, or the 369 00:26:41,035 --> 00:26:46,835 Speaker 1: Democratic National Committee or the head of some housecroup that 370 00:26:46,995 --> 00:26:49,635 Speaker 1: belongs to the Democrats, or with some random account on 371 00:26:49,675 --> 00:26:55,275 Speaker 1: Twitter or on truth social that Trump found. You're using 372 00:26:55,395 --> 00:27:01,635 Speaker 1: Trump's evidence to support Trump's bullshit argument. The ninety eight 373 00:27:01,635 --> 00:27:04,635 Speaker 1: thousand Demo viewers is actually a shock because it's so high. 374 00:27:05,555 --> 00:27:09,755 Speaker 1: The second note, even Trump wasn't saying the Democrats had 375 00:27:09,835 --> 00:27:15,315 Speaker 1: done this. He said the News had done this. You 376 00:27:15,395 --> 00:27:18,035 Speaker 1: as assumed it has something to do with the Democrats, abbey. 377 00:27:18,835 --> 00:27:21,195 Speaker 1: The Democrats don't own the News. And you know how 378 00:27:21,195 --> 00:27:24,355 Speaker 1: we know that because if the Democrats owned the News, 379 00:27:25,035 --> 00:27:28,235 Speaker 1: or if Democrats or liberals owned CNN, they would have 380 00:27:28,275 --> 00:27:31,755 Speaker 1: gotten rid of Abby Phillip by now, and certainly the 381 00:27:31,875 --> 00:27:35,555 Speaker 1: asshole Scott Jennings would be back doing whatever he used 382 00:27:35,555 --> 00:27:43,115 Speaker 1: to do, full time cooking fahdas somewhere or knishes. But 383 00:27:43,235 --> 00:27:47,915 Speaker 1: the winner, Kaylee McGee white, someone from the Washington Examiner. 384 00:27:49,035 --> 00:27:50,715 Speaker 1: I know, I know, I could just stop there and 385 00:27:50,755 --> 00:27:54,075 Speaker 1: go to the break right there saying the names Kaylee 386 00:27:54,075 --> 00:27:56,555 Speaker 1: and Washington Examiner. That's enough to win worst person in 387 00:27:56,595 --> 00:28:00,755 Speaker 1: the World. Wait, there's more. That's also Kaylee McGee white 388 00:28:00,795 --> 00:28:05,035 Speaker 1: of one of the American Federation of Women, Federation of 389 00:28:05,275 --> 00:28:09,595 Speaker 1: Women federations and whatever. There's ten million of these fascist 390 00:28:09,595 --> 00:28:12,475 Speaker 1: think tanks. They all involved the same six words, just 391 00:28:12,515 --> 00:28:18,635 Speaker 1: listed in a different order. Federation Women Tank think Anyway, 392 00:28:18,715 --> 00:28:22,955 Speaker 1: Fox brought her on to discuss the Trump cloned executed 393 00:28:23,075 --> 00:28:27,835 Speaker 1: robot story with the anchor John Roberts. Incidentally, John used 394 00:28:27,835 --> 00:28:30,755 Speaker 1: to be In addition to being a VJ in Canada, 395 00:28:30,995 --> 00:28:33,595 Speaker 1: John was then a news reporter in Canada and the 396 00:28:33,675 --> 00:28:36,515 Speaker 1: United States and anchored the news on CBS on the weekends. 397 00:28:36,835 --> 00:28:42,515 Speaker 1: Now he's just another Trump whore reading propaganda. He read 398 00:28:42,555 --> 00:28:46,595 Speaker 1: Trump's insane post and says, I know Trump's sense of humor. 399 00:28:46,995 --> 00:28:50,595 Speaker 1: I'm as humor hum Oh you are, I know Trump's 400 00:28:50,595 --> 00:28:53,995 Speaker 1: sense of humor. I'm sure he was just trolling. And 401 00:28:54,075 --> 00:28:57,795 Speaker 1: Miss Kaylee McGhee white, who they put on Fox. Evidently 402 00:28:57,835 --> 00:29:01,155 Speaker 1: because they like Kaylee's on Fox. Hey, order up some 403 00:29:01,195 --> 00:29:04,195 Speaker 1: more Kaylee's. They grow them on the Kaylee farm in 404 00:29:04,275 --> 00:29:09,475 Speaker 1: South Dakota. Call Christy, she must know where the Kaylees are. Yeah, 405 00:29:09,475 --> 00:29:17,555 Speaker 1: the Kayley farm. It's near the Christie Ranch. Anyway, Kayley 406 00:29:17,755 --> 00:29:20,995 Speaker 1: said the real issue was being obscured here by all 407 00:29:21,035 --> 00:29:24,115 Speaker 1: of the nonsense about the tweet. The real issue to 408 00:29:24,275 --> 00:29:28,475 Speaker 1: Kayley McGee white was that, namely, who was running the 409 00:29:28,515 --> 00:29:32,675 Speaker 1: country during the Biden presidency quote. Was it a clone? 410 00:29:33,075 --> 00:29:36,235 Speaker 1: She began to giggle. Was it a cable of White 411 00:29:36,235 --> 00:29:40,995 Speaker 1: House and fishes. A cable, she said, a cable. She 412 00:29:41,195 --> 00:29:46,475 Speaker 1: meant the word cabal. She thinks the word cabal is 413 00:29:46,595 --> 00:29:56,675 Speaker 1: pronounced cable, cabal, cabal, And apparently every time she's ever 414 00:29:56,715 --> 00:29:58,635 Speaker 1: heard it from one of her friends over there at 415 00:29:58,635 --> 00:30:06,395 Speaker 1: the American Federation of Kayley's, they pronounced it cable. Why 416 00:30:06,435 --> 00:30:09,955 Speaker 1: not cabell? Was it a clown? Was it a cabelle 417 00:30:09,955 --> 00:30:12,675 Speaker 1: of White House officials? Was it a cabelle of White 418 00:30:12,675 --> 00:30:18,995 Speaker 1: House officials? Now on cable? She also says, Kaylee McGee white, 419 00:30:19,715 --> 00:30:24,715 Speaker 1: she is a fellow at the Steamboat Institute, which seems 420 00:30:24,755 --> 00:30:29,555 Speaker 1: like a rather unfortunate thing to admit about on the self. Realistically, 421 00:30:30,835 --> 00:30:36,595 Speaker 1: Kaylee McGhee at the mercy of a cable of Wyatt 422 00:30:36,595 --> 00:30:43,355 Speaker 1: House officials White Today's other worst person. 423 00:30:44,115 --> 00:31:03,635 Speaker 3: In the world. Came all a fun fun. 424 00:31:11,195 --> 00:31:14,555 Speaker 1: Two my favorite topic me and Things I Promised Not 425 00:31:14,635 --> 00:31:19,755 Speaker 1: to tell and d Day plus sixty. It was June sixth, 426 00:31:19,915 --> 00:31:23,515 Speaker 1: two thousand and four, and MSNBC's new president Rick Kaplan 427 00:31:23,595 --> 00:31:25,395 Speaker 1: needed to make a mark on the network for his 428 00:31:25,435 --> 00:31:28,315 Speaker 1: new bosses, and he decided this was gonna be it. 429 00:31:28,955 --> 00:31:32,235 Speaker 1: On June six, two thousand and four, Maybe the last 430 00:31:32,515 --> 00:31:36,115 Speaker 1: even numbered anniversary of D Day, where we'd have a 431 00:31:36,115 --> 00:31:39,275 Speaker 1: lot of people left who were there. We'd turned the 432 00:31:39,315 --> 00:31:43,475 Speaker 1: network all D Day. June six, two thousand and four 433 00:31:43,555 --> 00:31:46,195 Speaker 1: basically was going to be June sixth, nineteen forty four, 434 00:31:46,275 --> 00:31:50,675 Speaker 1: relived Tom Brokaw live on the visius of Normandy and 435 00:31:50,755 --> 00:31:54,235 Speaker 1: Somebody there and Somebody here and his main two MSNBC 436 00:31:54,355 --> 00:31:58,475 Speaker 1: news anchors, me and Lester Holt, anchoring two hour blocks 437 00:31:58,515 --> 00:32:00,835 Speaker 1: devoted to the anniversary, and then switching off, and he 438 00:32:00,875 --> 00:32:02,795 Speaker 1: came back, and I would go away, and then I'd 439 00:32:02,835 --> 00:32:05,595 Speaker 1: come back and he would go just wal toall. I'm 440 00:32:05,675 --> 00:32:08,435 Speaker 1: Rick Kaplan, and I used to produce for Walter Cronkite 441 00:32:08,675 --> 00:32:11,155 Speaker 1: to not only lock in his new gig at MSNBC, 442 00:32:11,315 --> 00:32:13,835 Speaker 1: but set himself up for his next goal executive in 443 00:32:13,915 --> 00:32:16,595 Speaker 1: charge of the Today Show or NBC Nightly News or 444 00:32:16,675 --> 00:32:19,875 Speaker 1: something bigger than that little crapshack we ran at MSNBC. 445 00:32:20,715 --> 00:32:24,315 Speaker 1: For my part, I was dispatched first to interview one 446 00:32:24,315 --> 00:32:27,155 Speaker 1: of the surprisingly large number of soldiers and sailors and 447 00:32:27,195 --> 00:32:31,475 Speaker 1: airmen who survived D Day and went on to fame. 448 00:32:32,275 --> 00:32:35,675 Speaker 1: There were actors Charles Derning and James Dewhan, Scotty on 449 00:32:35,715 --> 00:32:38,875 Speaker 1: Star Trek and the author J. D. Salinger and Seaman's 450 00:32:38,955 --> 00:32:43,595 Speaker 1: second Class Yogi Bearra. I met Yogi at his museum 451 00:32:43,635 --> 00:32:45,515 Speaker 1: in New Jersey, and I swear to God he and 452 00:32:45,555 --> 00:32:49,395 Speaker 1: his son demanded a friendly bribe to do the interview. 453 00:32:49,475 --> 00:32:52,275 Speaker 1: And what they wanted was my copy of the nineteen 454 00:32:52,355 --> 00:32:57,355 Speaker 1: sixty three tops Yogi Bearra baseball card. Seriously, that's the 455 00:32:57,435 --> 00:33:01,155 Speaker 1: toughest one to fined. Yogi said, we never have enough 456 00:33:01,195 --> 00:33:04,595 Speaker 1: of them here. I always enjoyed Yogi, but he had 457 00:33:04,915 --> 00:33:07,115 Speaker 1: to say about his nineteen sixty three baseball card and 458 00:33:07,155 --> 00:33:09,755 Speaker 1: its relative scarcity than he did about the D Day 459 00:33:09,795 --> 00:33:13,875 Speaker 1: invasion and his chief on his rocket launcher boat telling 460 00:33:13,955 --> 00:33:15,675 Speaker 1: him to keep his head down or he might get 461 00:33:15,715 --> 00:33:18,955 Speaker 1: to watch it fly off his neck. Anyway, the bar 462 00:33:19,155 --> 00:33:22,555 Speaker 1: interview was fine, and it was done, and we edited 463 00:33:22,675 --> 00:33:25,795 Speaker 1: like fifteen very very short answers into about two minutes 464 00:33:25,835 --> 00:33:29,155 Speaker 1: of not bad narrative. And I had written a couple 465 00:33:29,195 --> 00:33:31,275 Speaker 1: of other D Day features, and I'd written some other 466 00:33:31,395 --> 00:33:33,835 Speaker 1: scripts on Friday, and by Sunday we were all crammed 467 00:33:33,875 --> 00:33:37,075 Speaker 1: into the main MSNBC conference room in Secaucus, New Jersey, 468 00:33:37,395 --> 00:33:40,235 Speaker 1: everybody working a sixth day and you would have thought 469 00:33:40,275 --> 00:33:43,235 Speaker 1: this guy, Rick Kaplan, president of the network, was leading 470 00:33:43,595 --> 00:33:48,835 Speaker 1: the actual invasion of Normandy, not merely a cable TV 471 00:33:48,955 --> 00:33:53,955 Speaker 1: network coverage of the sixtieth anniversary. Thereof, Kaplin was waxing 472 00:33:53,995 --> 00:33:56,395 Speaker 1: poetic about how important this was for us, and how 473 00:33:56,395 --> 00:33:59,435 Speaker 1: it would put us on the map against CNN and Fox, 474 00:33:59,475 --> 00:34:02,155 Speaker 1: and how he had covered all the contingencies. And that's 475 00:34:02,155 --> 00:34:07,075 Speaker 1: when people's phone started vibrating, ringing. Kaplan was still enjoying 476 00:34:07,075 --> 00:34:10,275 Speaker 1: the sound of his own voice as these phones gradually 477 00:34:10,515 --> 00:34:13,235 Speaker 1: drowned him out. When one of the producers finished whispering 478 00:34:13,235 --> 00:34:16,835 Speaker 1: into his BlackBerry and then said, excuse me, Rick, we 479 00:34:16,955 --> 00:34:21,595 Speaker 1: have a problem. Ronald Reagan has just died. Without a word, 480 00:34:21,715 --> 00:34:25,795 Speaker 1: twenty people at that conference table rose and then froze, 481 00:34:26,155 --> 00:34:29,795 Speaker 1: realizing that before they abandoned this meeting to go get 482 00:34:29,795 --> 00:34:31,795 Speaker 1: on the air as quickly as possible, and then to 483 00:34:31,875 --> 00:34:34,515 Speaker 1: lay out what would be rolling coverage till at least 484 00:34:34,595 --> 00:34:37,835 Speaker 1: midnight of Reagan's death and life and reaction to it 485 00:34:38,395 --> 00:34:42,795 Speaker 1: till further notice. We couldn't just start. We basically had 486 00:34:42,795 --> 00:34:44,395 Speaker 1: to wait for the president of the network, who was 487 00:34:44,395 --> 00:34:46,795 Speaker 1: sitting there, Rick Kamplan, to say Okay, we'll figure out 488 00:34:46,835 --> 00:34:49,075 Speaker 1: the D Day stuff later. It's Reagan Day. Let's go. 489 00:34:50,435 --> 00:34:55,875 Speaker 1: Except he didn't say that, looking crestfallen, looking like a 490 00:34:55,955 --> 00:34:59,915 Speaker 1: kid who's had his toys stolen and then broken. As 491 00:34:59,955 --> 00:35:04,635 Speaker 1: he watched Rick Kamplan swept the room with his gaze, 492 00:35:05,235 --> 00:35:10,515 Speaker 1: he stopped on me. Thanks, couldn't we just uh, couldn't 493 00:35:10,515 --> 00:35:14,195 Speaker 1: we just do uh half an hour of Reagan and 494 00:35:14,235 --> 00:35:19,315 Speaker 1: then half an hour of my D Day and then 495 00:35:19,915 --> 00:35:25,075 Speaker 1: half an hour And he trailed off, and I said, Rick, 496 00:35:25,995 --> 00:35:29,795 Speaker 1: it's a two term president. I mean, I think he 497 00:35:29,875 --> 00:35:32,195 Speaker 1: was full of crap, but apparently a lot of American 498 00:35:32,235 --> 00:35:35,395 Speaker 1: thinks he's some sort of icon. And by the way, 499 00:35:35,395 --> 00:35:37,755 Speaker 1: it just it just happened like eleven minutes ago. It 500 00:35:37,755 --> 00:35:44,395 Speaker 1: didn't happen sixty years ago. I'm sorry. He was almost 501 00:35:44,595 --> 00:35:48,915 Speaker 1: literally pouting, But what about all my D Day coverage? 502 00:35:49,795 --> 00:35:52,875 Speaker 1: President of the network? And I said, well, we can 503 00:35:52,955 --> 00:35:56,635 Speaker 1: run those pieces throughout the day tomorrow. They won't just disappear. 504 00:35:56,715 --> 00:36:03,275 Speaker 1: We don't have to go degos the tapes. Okay, we 505 00:36:03,355 --> 00:36:05,875 Speaker 1: realized that the president of the news network was not 506 00:36:05,915 --> 00:36:08,035 Speaker 1: going to be any use helping us cover the first 507 00:36:08,035 --> 00:36:11,195 Speaker 1: big breaking news story of his presidency because it couldn't 508 00:36:11,235 --> 00:36:14,555 Speaker 1: bear to change his plans to accommodate breaking presidential news. 509 00:36:17,195 --> 00:36:19,755 Speaker 1: This was at the end of month three of the 510 00:36:19,835 --> 00:36:23,075 Speaker 1: Rick Kaplan MSNBC presidency. He was already on the ropes 511 00:36:23,115 --> 00:36:25,355 Speaker 1: with us. He would later be the guy who chased 512 00:36:25,355 --> 00:36:28,995 Speaker 1: me around the studios because he was squeamish and I'd 513 00:36:28,995 --> 00:36:31,595 Speaker 1: mentioned blood on the air and he thought I was 514 00:36:31,635 --> 00:36:36,195 Speaker 1: trying to sabotage his great show with Rita Cosby. He 515 00:36:36,235 --> 00:36:38,715 Speaker 1: would soon be the network president who did not know 516 00:36:39,155 --> 00:36:42,275 Speaker 1: what was live on TV and what was on delay. 517 00:36:42,275 --> 00:36:44,595 Speaker 1: I'll tell you that story in a minute too. However, 518 00:36:45,555 --> 00:36:50,355 Speaker 1: the Rick Kaplan story starts in the men's room at MSNBC. 519 00:36:51,035 --> 00:36:54,795 Speaker 1: It is February seventeenth, two thousand and four, at one 520 00:36:54,835 --> 00:36:58,875 Speaker 1: of those moronic corporate speak town halls. The bosses have 521 00:36:59,035 --> 00:37:02,275 Speaker 1: just introduced Rick Kaplan as the new president of the network. 522 00:37:02,595 --> 00:37:06,475 Speaker 1: Kaplan speaks for an hour without interruption. He does not 523 00:37:06,675 --> 00:37:09,435 Speaker 1: mention that he was the president of CNN when it's 524 00:37:09,515 --> 00:37:11,595 Speaker 1: nineteen year streak at number one in the cable news 525 00:37:11,715 --> 00:37:14,795 Speaker 1: ratings came to an abrupt end. He does, however, mention 526 00:37:15,315 --> 00:37:19,955 Speaker 1: that he is six feet seven inches tall, but he 527 00:37:19,995 --> 00:37:26,275 Speaker 1: does not seem to be six feet seven inches tall. 528 00:37:27,515 --> 00:37:30,075 Speaker 1: As this nonsense ends, I rush into the men's room 529 00:37:30,155 --> 00:37:35,875 Speaker 1: and find, to my amusement, Joe Scarborough, Chris Matthews, Jesse Ventura, 530 00:37:36,555 --> 00:37:41,955 Speaker 1: lesterr Holt, and one unoccupied yurinoll. As I moved to 531 00:37:42,075 --> 00:37:45,715 Speaker 1: occupy it, it dawns on me that Ventura, the former 532 00:37:45,795 --> 00:37:50,075 Speaker 1: professional wrestler, is the shortest man in the bathroom, at 533 00:37:50,075 --> 00:37:54,795 Speaker 1: six feet two. All five of us are silent. Finally, 534 00:37:54,875 --> 00:37:57,875 Speaker 1: Matthews says it helen hell can. He says six foot seven. 535 00:37:57,875 --> 00:37:59,795 Speaker 1: He's barely taller than I am, and I'm six four. 536 00:38:00,395 --> 00:38:02,715 Speaker 1: Oh are you slightly taller than me? You're slightly shorter 537 00:38:02,795 --> 00:38:08,275 Speaker 1: than me? How is he six seven? Everybody keeps looking forward, 538 00:38:08,315 --> 00:38:11,995 Speaker 1: of course, into the wall in front of us. I'm 539 00:38:12,075 --> 00:38:14,995 Speaker 1: six three and a half. Lester's your height? I saw 540 00:38:15,075 --> 00:38:17,155 Speaker 1: you standing with him? You tour even. What are you six'? 541 00:38:17,235 --> 00:38:22,435 Speaker 1: Five lester, says uh huh and. Flushes scarborough chimes, In 542 00:38:22,875 --> 00:38:25,955 Speaker 1: i'm just over sixty. Four we're almost. Eyed, aye he's 543 00:38:25,955 --> 00:38:30,795 Speaker 1: not six. Seven, Finally ventura, Speaks i've been thrown around 544 00:38:30,835 --> 00:38:33,755 Speaker 1: a ring by guys who're six. Seven this guy's not 545 00:38:33,915 --> 00:38:38,675 Speaker 1: six seven from the. Sink Lester holt now, says have 546 00:38:38,795 --> 00:38:41,835 Speaker 1: any of you known anybody our height who lies and 547 00:38:41,915 --> 00:38:45,995 Speaker 1: says they're? Taller matthews, again who lies about their? Height 548 00:38:46,755 --> 00:38:51,395 Speaker 1: eye flush this guy, does, gentlemen we are in trouble 549 00:38:51,435 --> 00:38:56,275 Speaker 1: here for the presidency Of Rick kamplan AT. Msnbc that 550 00:38:56,395 --> 00:39:00,075 Speaker 1: might have been, SORRY i can't resist it the high water. 551 00:39:00,315 --> 00:39:04,355 Speaker 1: Mark later On, Friday march, fifth two thousand and, four 552 00:39:04,915 --> 00:39:07,635 Speaker 1: who had been there three, weeks assemble the hosts and 553 00:39:07,675 --> 00:39:09,995 Speaker 1: producers of the primetime shows on the. Network that would 554 00:39:10,035 --> 00:39:14,555 Speaker 1: have been, Me, Scarborough Dan, abrams our, staffs the New 555 00:39:14,635 --> 00:39:17,515 Speaker 1: jersey staff Of Chris matthew's. Show and he told us 556 00:39:17,555 --> 00:39:20,995 Speaker 1: that the next day was going to Be. Monday somebody 557 00:39:21,075 --> 00:39:24,955 Speaker 1: From scarborough's staff helpfully corrected, him Mister, Kaplan i'm, sorry 558 00:39:24,955 --> 00:39:29,275 Speaker 1: tomorrow Is. Saturday kaplan sternly explained he was now president 559 00:39:29,315 --> 00:39:31,795 Speaker 1: of this, network and we all. Sucked and if he 560 00:39:31,835 --> 00:39:35,395 Speaker 1: said today Was friday and tomorrow Was, monday then today 561 00:39:35,475 --> 00:39:38,555 Speaker 1: Was friday and tomorrow Was. Monday he wanted to see 562 00:39:38,635 --> 00:39:41,875 Speaker 1: us react to sudden changes in our. Plans we were 563 00:39:41,955 --> 00:39:44,115 Speaker 1: being told we were being called into work a sixth 564 00:39:44,235 --> 00:39:49,555 Speaker 1: day tomorrow for no. Reason kaplin then started yelling at, 565 00:39:49,675 --> 00:39:52,715 Speaker 1: Us you guys don't get. It you're all working. Tomorrow 566 00:39:52,875 --> 00:39:55,355 Speaker 1: anybody who doesn't come in is. Fired we are going 567 00:39:55,395 --> 00:39:58,875 Speaker 1: to do the whole pro primetime. Lineup your breaking news 568 00:39:58,955 --> 00:40:02,075 Speaker 1: is today's breaking, news the guilty verdict in The Martha stewart. 569 00:40:02,115 --> 00:40:05,515 Speaker 1: Case start booking your, guests because tomorrow it Is, monday Not. 570 00:40:05,635 --> 00:40:11,195 Speaker 1: Saturday just on my, Staff saturday was supposed to be 571 00:40:11,235 --> 00:40:15,635 Speaker 1: my reporter's engagement, party a surprise party thrown by one 572 00:40:15,635 --> 00:40:18,595 Speaker 1: of my producers for his wife's, birthday and the day 573 00:40:18,675 --> 00:40:23,635 Speaker 1: another producer was closing on buying a. HOUSE i have 574 00:40:23,675 --> 00:40:25,715 Speaker 1: a vague memory of what we put on the. AIR 575 00:40:25,755 --> 00:40:27,515 Speaker 1: i have a stronger memory of the new president OF 576 00:40:27,595 --> 00:40:31,995 Speaker 1: msnbc losing the staffs of all four of his primetime 577 00:40:32,075 --> 00:40:34,835 Speaker 1: shows on his fifth day on the job and never 578 00:40:35,115 --> 00:40:39,595 Speaker 1: ever getting them. Back kaplan then went to a corkboard 579 00:40:39,715 --> 00:40:42,435 Speaker 1: on our office wall on which our show rundown was. 580 00:40:42,435 --> 00:40:45,915 Speaker 1: Displayed he ordered producers to move segments, around and he 581 00:40:45,995 --> 00:40:48,955 Speaker 1: berated me for not having anticipated his whims and at 582 00:40:48,955 --> 00:40:51,475 Speaker 1: one point he, screamed, stop what the hell are you? 583 00:40:51,555 --> 00:40:54,275 Speaker 1: Doing and he got up and he grabbed the push, 584 00:40:54,355 --> 00:40:57,435 Speaker 1: pin which held up an index card bearing the name 585 00:40:57,475 --> 00:41:01,475 Speaker 1: of a. Guest you don't use green pins with yellow index. 586 00:41:01,555 --> 00:41:06,835 Speaker 1: Cards you use yellow pins with yellow index. Cards what 587 00:41:07,035 --> 00:41:11,635 Speaker 1: kind of a newsman are? You can't imagine how this 588 00:41:11,675 --> 00:41:15,435 Speaker 1: guy choked away CNN's monopoly on cable news. RATINGS i 589 00:41:15,555 --> 00:41:19,235 Speaker 1: was reminded recently that, later On december, eighth two thousand and, 590 00:41:19,235 --> 00:41:22,715 Speaker 1: five seventeen years, ago, tomorrow he did one of the 591 00:41:22,755 --> 00:41:27,955 Speaker 1: most unintentionally funniest THINGS i have ever. WITNESSED a plane 592 00:41:28,075 --> 00:41:31,235 Speaker 1: slid off the runway At Midway airport In. Chicago nothing 593 00:41:31,275 --> 00:41:35,075 Speaker 1: funny about, that, obviously But kaplan called into our control 594 00:41:35,195 --> 00:41:38,995 Speaker 1: room demanding we changed something about our live coverage that 595 00:41:39,035 --> 00:41:41,155 Speaker 1: he didn't. Like we promptly made the. Change he was. 596 00:41:41,235 --> 00:41:44,675 Speaker 1: Right five minutes later he called in and started swearing 597 00:41:44,715 --> 00:41:47,075 Speaker 1: at one of our. PRODUCERS i told you to change. 598 00:41:47,075 --> 00:41:51,115 Speaker 1: That f, you you're, Fired and the producer, said we 599 00:41:51,195 --> 00:41:54,475 Speaker 1: changed it five minutes. Ago when you called, in, Silence, 600 00:41:55,395 --> 00:41:57,435 Speaker 1: rick are you watching the network on some sort of? 601 00:41:57,475 --> 00:42:03,195 Speaker 1: Delay are you watching ON tvo or? Something silence. Again 602 00:42:03,635 --> 00:42:06,675 Speaker 1: finally he, Said, okay good, work see you tomorrow and hung. 603 00:42:06,795 --> 00:42:11,275 Speaker 1: Up he didn't know he was watching it on a. 604 00:42:11,355 --> 00:42:14,875 Speaker 1: Delay kaplan was also one of these forget the mean 605 00:42:14,915 --> 00:42:17,475 Speaker 1: THING i said. Yesterday god KNOWS i have kind of. 606 00:42:17,515 --> 00:42:20,475 Speaker 1: Guys By, monday he had heard people laughing at some 607 00:42:20,555 --> 00:42:24,035 Speaker 1: of my on air jokes and his front runner instincts took. 608 00:42:24,075 --> 00:42:27,155 Speaker 1: Over he called me and the producer in for a. 609 00:42:27,195 --> 00:42:29,835 Speaker 1: MEETING i have only one criticism of your. Show the 610 00:42:30,035 --> 00:42:32,275 Speaker 1: which of these? Stories who you be talking? About? Thing is? 611 00:42:32,315 --> 00:42:35,155 Speaker 1: Genius the fifth, story the fourth, story then the third. 612 00:42:35,155 --> 00:42:41,235 Speaker 1: Story it's original and. FRESH i. HESITATED i almost said to, him, 613 00:42:41,595 --> 00:42:44,835 Speaker 1: yeah this whole counting. Thing we just invented. That the 614 00:42:44,955 --> 00:42:48,075 Speaker 1: music is, genius the graphics are. Genius you're a, genius 615 00:42:48,115 --> 00:42:51,115 Speaker 1: but you're missing something, obvious something. Genius after each one 616 00:42:51,155 --> 00:42:53,995 Speaker 1: of these, stories after you thank your, guest you should 617 00:42:53,995 --> 00:42:55,675 Speaker 1: do a list of the things you didn't tell us 618 00:42:55,675 --> 00:42:58,835 Speaker 1: about those. Stories so like after the fifth, story you should, 619 00:42:58,875 --> 00:43:01,115 Speaker 1: say now here are the other five things we didn't 620 00:43:01,155 --> 00:43:03,435 Speaker 1: tell you about the fifth, story get it a full 621 00:43:03,515 --> 00:43:06,355 Speaker 1: screen graphic and you telling, People and then four things 622 00:43:06,355 --> 00:43:10,595 Speaker 1: for the fourth story and three for the. THIRD i 623 00:43:10,635 --> 00:43:12,315 Speaker 1: thought for a, moment AND i, said, okay but what 624 00:43:12,395 --> 00:43:14,555 Speaker 1: happens if we make those graphics, up and then a minute, 625 00:43:14,595 --> 00:43:17,475 Speaker 1: beforehand the guest brings up one of those things we 626 00:43:17,555 --> 00:43:20,955 Speaker 1: claim we didn't tell. You when he just told, you 627 00:43:22,275 --> 00:43:25,875 Speaker 1: we had Lost Rick caplin's attention by that. Point, hmmm he. 628 00:43:25,955 --> 00:43:29,355 Speaker 1: Grunted for a, SECOND i thought his eyes were pointing 629 00:43:29,435 --> 00:43:33,035 Speaker 1: outwards in different, directions but he snapped himself back into this. 630 00:43:33,115 --> 00:43:37,075 Speaker 1: Reality huh could. Happen you'll figure it out, anyway too 631 00:43:37,115 --> 00:43:39,075 Speaker 1: late to do it, today figure it out and do it. Tomorrow, 632 00:43:39,115 --> 00:43:43,955 Speaker 1: thanks the producer AND i had to then explain to 633 00:43:43,995 --> 00:43:46,235 Speaker 1: the staff Of countdown that from now, on for every 634 00:43:46,315 --> 00:43:49,635 Speaker 1: story they had to deliberately leave out one or two 635 00:43:49,755 --> 00:43:53,675 Speaker 1: or three or four or five facts or, details something 636 00:43:53,715 --> 00:43:56,075 Speaker 1: interesting enough to be made into a full screen, graphic 637 00:43:56,115 --> 00:43:59,395 Speaker 1: but not interesting enough to be included in their scripts 638 00:43:59,515 --> 00:44:03,435 Speaker 1: or the interviews with the. Guests SUDDENLY i thought a 639 00:44:03,435 --> 00:44:06,595 Speaker 1: lot of people's eyes were pointing outwards in different. Directions 640 00:44:07,475 --> 00:44:09,875 Speaker 1: the line, Producer Greg, kordick who was in charge not 641 00:44:09,955 --> 00:44:12,675 Speaker 1: of content but of timing things and making sure things 642 00:44:12,715 --> 00:44:15,915 Speaker 1: like graphics got, made, said matter of, factly this will 643 00:44:15,915 --> 00:44:19,995 Speaker 1: add five hours to everybody's, workday and so it. Did 644 00:44:21,355 --> 00:44:23,595 Speaker 1: after the next day's, show when we listed the top 645 00:44:23,595 --> 00:44:25,675 Speaker 1: five things we didn't tell you about today's fifth story 646 00:44:25,715 --> 00:44:27,195 Speaker 1: and the top four things we didn't tell you about 647 00:44:27,195 --> 00:44:29,955 Speaker 1: today's fourth, story et. Cetera and we had to shorten 648 00:44:29,995 --> 00:44:32,675 Speaker 1: all the scripts and shorten each interview just to make 649 00:44:32,755 --> 00:44:36,315 Speaker 1: room for all of this extraneous. Crap greg the producer, 650 00:44:36,355 --> 00:44:39,795 Speaker 1: said people here will be quitting By thursday and dying By. 651 00:44:39,835 --> 00:44:42,235 Speaker 1: Monday AND i, said you're. Right plus it ruins the 652 00:44:42,235 --> 00:44:44,315 Speaker 1: interviews and it weakens the. Show don't do it tomorrow 653 00:44:44,355 --> 00:44:47,595 Speaker 1: With kaplan, Yells i'll take the. Eight so now It's. 654 00:44:47,635 --> 00:44:51,075 Speaker 1: Wednesday and not only DON'T i hear anything From kaplan 655 00:44:51,115 --> 00:44:53,595 Speaker 1: about The tuesday show and his the top five things 656 00:44:53,635 --> 00:44:56,155 Speaker 1: we didn't tell you about today's fifth, Story, jazz but 657 00:44:56,235 --> 00:44:59,195 Speaker 1: after The wednesday show when we don't do, It i'm 658 00:44:59,195 --> 00:45:02,155 Speaker 1: sitting there waiting for an enraged phone call because we 659 00:45:02,235 --> 00:45:05,435 Speaker 1: Didn't thursday morning at, Home i'm waiting for an enraged. 660 00:45:05,435 --> 00:45:09,475 Speaker 1: Email thursday, Afternoon i'm waiting for an Enraged kaplan in. Person. 661 00:45:10,995 --> 00:45:15,995 Speaker 1: Nothing he never said a. Word the week passes, nothing a, 662 00:45:16,075 --> 00:45:20,795 Speaker 1: month two, months it's, summer. Nothing the rest of two 663 00:45:20,835 --> 00:45:25,035 Speaker 1: thousand and four flies by. Nothing we did it, Once 664 00:45:25,315 --> 00:45:30,955 Speaker 1: we never did it. Again and then he never said. 665 00:45:30,995 --> 00:45:34,635 Speaker 1: Anything it is Now january two thousand and, five and 666 00:45:34,635 --> 00:45:36,475 Speaker 1: he still hasn't said. Anything And i'm told By Phil, 667 00:45:36,515 --> 00:45:40,675 Speaker 1: griffin my first producer in television sports and sixteen years 668 00:45:40,755 --> 00:45:43,875 Speaker 1: later of my first producer in television, news who has 669 00:45:43,915 --> 00:45:46,675 Speaker 1: since become the vice president OF, msnbc That kaplan wants 670 00:45:46,715 --> 00:45:49,115 Speaker 1: to see us in his. Office it's not a big. 671 00:45:49,115 --> 00:45:51,395 Speaker 1: Deal phil, says he's in a good. Mood he just 672 00:45:51,435 --> 00:45:53,395 Speaker 1: wants to make us feel like we have input into his. 673 00:45:53,475 --> 00:45:57,635 Speaker 1: Decisions this is a what do you think? Meeting, NOW 674 00:45:57,715 --> 00:46:00,155 Speaker 1: i have to ask you to carefully picture the layout 675 00:46:00,155 --> 00:46:03,075 Speaker 1: Of Rick kaplan's office AT msnbc in the year two 676 00:46:03,115 --> 00:46:07,715 Speaker 1: thousand and. Five envision a law, long narrow. Room BASEBALL'S 677 00:46:07,835 --> 00:46:10,995 Speaker 1: mlb network now operates, there and they have cleverly Turned 678 00:46:11,075 --> 00:46:15,755 Speaker 1: kaplan's office into a wardrobe, room perfect since it was 679 00:46:15,875 --> 00:46:19,435 Speaker 1: really just a long. Closet, Anyways Rick, kaplan who was 680 00:46:19,475 --> 00:46:21,515 Speaker 1: six foot five but lied and said he was six foot, 681 00:46:21,555 --> 00:46:24,355 Speaker 1: seven sat at the very back of this. Room so 682 00:46:24,395 --> 00:46:26,675 Speaker 1: you come in the front, door you turn to your, 683 00:46:26,755 --> 00:46:31,755 Speaker 1: right and maybe thirty thirty five forty feet away from, 684 00:46:31,795 --> 00:46:34,955 Speaker 1: you in the farthest, corner facing his computer on his. 685 00:46:35,075 --> 00:46:38,075 Speaker 1: Desk Flush against the left hand wall is the president OF. 686 00:46:38,195 --> 00:46:41,835 Speaker 1: MSNBC a few feet into the room is where you. 687 00:46:41,955 --> 00:46:46,155 Speaker 1: Sit halfway between these two. Points against the right hand 688 00:46:46,195 --> 00:46:50,475 Speaker 1: wall is where another executive can. Sit So Phil griffin sits. 689 00:46:50,515 --> 00:46:54,395 Speaker 1: THERE i am just inside the. Door he is fifteen 690 00:46:54,395 --> 00:46:56,875 Speaker 1: feet ahead of me to the. Right Rick kamplan is 691 00:46:56,955 --> 00:46:58,955 Speaker 1: thirty feet or forty feet ahead of me to the. 692 00:46:59,035 --> 00:47:03,195 Speaker 1: Left picture this, carefully the way these chairs and desks are. 693 00:47:03,315 --> 00:47:06,955 Speaker 1: Arranged if you're me And Phil griffin is looking at, 694 00:47:06,995 --> 00:47:09,995 Speaker 1: You Rick kaplan can only see the back Of Phil 695 00:47:09,995 --> 00:47:13,475 Speaker 1: griffin's head and not his. Face if they are both 696 00:47:13,515 --> 00:47:19,355 Speaker 1: looking at, you they cannot see each. Other, weird seemingly 697 00:47:19,435 --> 00:47:23,995 Speaker 1: trivial turned out to be. Essential we begin this meaningless 698 00:47:24,035 --> 00:47:27,595 Speaker 1: meeting and talk about guests and, graphics, fonts And kaplan 699 00:47:27,595 --> 00:47:29,595 Speaker 1: talks about how much the ratings have gone up in 700 00:47:29,635 --> 00:47:32,435 Speaker 1: his year as. President and, FINALLY i, SAY i do 701 00:47:32,555 --> 00:47:34,595 Speaker 1: have one. SUGGESTION i think the show is going to 702 00:47:34,635 --> 00:47:36,395 Speaker 1: be very, successful AND i think if we want to 703 00:47:36,395 --> 00:47:39,835 Speaker 1: make any, changes we should make them now before it becomes. 704 00:47:39,995 --> 00:47:44,555 Speaker 1: Successful AND i, SAY i have never heard anybody say 705 00:47:44,555 --> 00:47:48,635 Speaker 1: they like the fifth, story fourth, story third, story. Stuff 706 00:47:48,915 --> 00:47:51,835 Speaker 1: if you want to continue the name countdown because people 707 00:47:51,875 --> 00:47:54,915 Speaker 1: know it by, now that's, GREAT i. Guess but the 708 00:47:54,955 --> 00:47:58,395 Speaker 1: five four three two one numbering is a conceit and 709 00:47:58,435 --> 00:48:00,355 Speaker 1: it's a lot of extra work for, everybody AND i 710 00:48:00,395 --> 00:48:06,515 Speaker 1: think we should kill it. Now caplan is, ghast he is. 711 00:48:07,035 --> 00:48:13,355 Speaker 1: Pale he is not, angry he is just. Stunned but 712 00:48:13,515 --> 00:48:16,635 Speaker 1: you can't do. That five four three two one is 713 00:48:17,075 --> 00:48:19,915 Speaker 1: part of the reasons the ratings went. Up the ratings 714 00:48:19,955 --> 00:48:21,915 Speaker 1: went up WHEN i came up with the idea of 715 00:48:21,995 --> 00:48:23,875 Speaker 1: the top five things we didn't tell you about today's 716 00:48:23,915 --> 00:48:26,595 Speaker 1: top five, stories and the top four things we didn't 717 00:48:26,595 --> 00:48:30,515 Speaker 1: tell you about today's number four, story et. Cetera we 718 00:48:30,555 --> 00:48:36,795 Speaker 1: can't stop. That that's why people Watch my. Idea took 719 00:48:36,875 --> 00:48:39,355 Speaker 1: me a split second to even remember what the hell 720 00:48:39,595 --> 00:48:42,515 Speaker 1: was he was talking. ABOUT i had forgotten the whole 721 00:48:42,555 --> 00:48:46,115 Speaker 1: five things we didn't tell You albatross weeks after the 722 00:48:46,155 --> 00:48:48,875 Speaker 1: one show we did, it and then the staff rebelled 723 00:48:48,875 --> 00:48:50,635 Speaker 1: AND i, said screw, it And i'll take the. Heat 724 00:48:50,915 --> 00:48:52,995 Speaker 1: AND i was about to say this out loud WHEN 725 00:48:52,995 --> 00:48:55,915 Speaker 1: i suddenly realized That Phil, griffin fifteen feet away on 726 00:48:55,955 --> 00:48:58,795 Speaker 1: the right his face turned to me and thus invisible To, 727 00:48:58,875 --> 00:49:01,115 Speaker 1: kaplan thirty feet away on the, left was making his 728 00:49:01,275 --> 00:49:04,515 Speaker 1: eyes as wide as, possible And phil was looking right 729 00:49:04,515 --> 00:49:08,995 Speaker 1: at at me and silently mouthing the word, no, no, no, no, 730 00:49:08,995 --> 00:49:12,555 Speaker 1: no all the while keeping his head completely, still So 731 00:49:12,795 --> 00:49:18,675 Speaker 1: kaplan didn't know he was talking to me. SILENTLY i 732 00:49:18,715 --> 00:49:22,035 Speaker 1: Got phil's. MESSAGE i dropped the. SUBJECT i didn't say. 733 00:49:22,075 --> 00:49:25,595 Speaker 1: It the meeting ended maybe two minutes, later With kaplan 734 00:49:25,675 --> 00:49:27,835 Speaker 1: saying keep up the good, work and ushering us out by, 735 00:49:27,835 --> 00:49:29,915 Speaker 1: saying and keep up with the tough five things we 736 00:49:29,955 --> 00:49:32,275 Speaker 1: didn't tell you about today's five fifth. Story oh that's 737 00:49:32,315 --> 00:49:37,555 Speaker 1: what's making it really. Cook when we were out of 738 00:49:37,595 --> 00:49:40,395 Speaker 1: earshot Of Rick, Kaplan griffin thanked me for being able 739 00:49:40,435 --> 00:49:44,595 Speaker 1: to read his panicked. LIPS i used an oath to 740 00:49:44,675 --> 00:49:47,395 Speaker 1: liven up my. Question what the blank was that all? 741 00:49:47,435 --> 00:49:50,795 Speaker 1: About And griffin, said now you know what every day 742 00:49:50,795 --> 00:49:53,195 Speaker 1: of my life has. Become it's not worth it to 743 00:49:53,235 --> 00:49:56,435 Speaker 1: try to correct. Him he believes what he, believes and 744 00:49:56,835 --> 00:50:00,675 Speaker 1: he won't be checked or. Contradicted AND i, said we 745 00:50:00,795 --> 00:50:03,955 Speaker 1: only did the five things we didn't tell you a thing, 746 00:50:04,155 --> 00:50:08,035 Speaker 1: once only. Once it's like a year. Later how in 747 00:50:08,075 --> 00:50:10,355 Speaker 1: the hell could he possibly think we're still doing. It 748 00:50:12,315 --> 00:50:15,435 Speaker 1: griffin laughed like a soldier on A World War one 749 00:50:15,515 --> 00:50:19,275 Speaker 1: battlefield who has just run out of. Bullets, see that's the, problem. 750 00:50:19,315 --> 00:50:22,995 Speaker 1: Buddy he only WATCHES msnbc here in the, office the 751 00:50:22,995 --> 00:50:29,795 Speaker 1: place he's renting it doesn't have. Cable president OF msnbc 752 00:50:29,955 --> 00:50:35,795 Speaker 1: doesn't have cable at. Home On june, sixth two thousand and, 753 00:50:35,835 --> 00:50:38,355 Speaker 1: six they Fired Rick kaplan as the president OF. Msnbc 754 00:50:38,435 --> 00:50:41,595 Speaker 1: they let him. Resign they also let him keep his, 755 00:50:41,755 --> 00:50:45,755 Speaker 1: secret the darkest of secrets for him and FOR, msnbc, 756 00:50:46,115 --> 00:50:49,435 Speaker 1: that for his two years on the, throne the president 757 00:50:49,595 --> 00:50:54,555 Speaker 1: of an all news cable channel did not have. Cable 758 00:51:08,155 --> 00:51:09,955 Speaker 1: i've done all the DAMAGE i can do. Here thank 759 00:51:09,995 --> 00:51:15,035 Speaker 1: you for. Listening Rick. Kaplan it could be A broadway. 760 00:51:15,075 --> 00:51:20,835 Speaker 1: Show his, career just the. SPARTS i witnessed at least 761 00:51:20,875 --> 00:51:25,115 Speaker 1: eighty five minutes of unbelievable entertainment LIKE i don't, know 762 00:51:25,235 --> 00:51:27,315 Speaker 1: like you can't take it with you kind of, humor 763 00:51:28,235 --> 00:51:32,555 Speaker 1: NonStop kaufman kind of humor from the nineteen twenties and, 764 00:51:32,595 --> 00:51:40,275 Speaker 1: thirties totally. Unbelievable most of our countdown. Music i'll do 765 00:51:40,315 --> 00:51:43,475 Speaker 1: a special On Rick, kaplan one of these, Days maybe Next. 766 00:51:43,555 --> 00:51:46,675 Speaker 1: Tuesday most of our countdown music was, arranged, produced and 767 00:51:46,715 --> 00:51:49,835 Speaker 1: performed By Brian ray And John Phillips shaneil our musical 768 00:51:49,875 --> 00:51:53,395 Speaker 1: directors Have. Countdown it was produced By Tko. Brothers Mister 769 00:51:53,475 --> 00:51:56,235 Speaker 1: ray was on the, guitars bass and. Drums Mister chanelle 770 00:51:56,275 --> 00:52:00,315 Speaker 1: handled orchestration and. Keyboards our satirical and pithy musical comments 771 00:52:00,355 --> 00:52:03,315 Speaker 1: are by the best baseball stadium organist, Ever Nancy. Faust 772 00:52:03,355 --> 00:52:07,315 Speaker 1: The olberman theme for ME espn two appears courtesy OF, Espn. 773 00:52:07,435 --> 00:52:10,515 Speaker 1: Inc it's the sports. Music it was written By Mitch Warren. 774 00:52:10,595 --> 00:52:13,875 Speaker 1: Davis other music arranged and performed by the Group No Horns. 775 00:52:13,875 --> 00:52:17,115 Speaker 1: Allowed and my announcer today was my late Friend George. 776 00:52:17,155 --> 00:52:21,675 Speaker 1: Carlin none of this is his. Fault everything else was 777 00:52:21,915 --> 00:52:28,835 Speaker 1: as always my, fault Although george did. Help that's countdown for. 778 00:52:28,875 --> 00:52:33,275 Speaker 1: Today Happy, Birthday, Sis happy Belated. Birthday Kit. Day one 779 00:52:33,355 --> 00:52:36,195 Speaker 1: hundred and thirty seven Of america held hostage just one 780 00:52:36,675 --> 00:52:39,435 Speaker 1: three hundred and twenty six days until the scheduled end 781 00:52:39,435 --> 00:52:42,955 Speaker 1: Of trump's lame duck and lame brained term Unless putin 782 00:52:43,035 --> 00:52:47,955 Speaker 1: removes him, sooner or the actuarial tables, do or his 783 00:52:48,115 --> 00:52:58,715 Speaker 1: new enemy musk does ah. AnyWho the next scheduled countdown Is. 784 00:52:58,795 --> 00:53:03,555 Speaker 1: Monday no results yet from The tuesday special episode. Experiment 785 00:53:04,115 --> 00:53:05,515 Speaker 1: as you can see see it seems to have had 786 00:53:05,515 --> 00:53:08,835 Speaker 1: an effect on my ability to contain myself in the 787 00:53:08,835 --> 00:53:12,915 Speaker 1: Regular thursday, episode for WHICH i apologize and or thank 788 00:53:12,955 --> 00:53:17,035 Speaker 1: you for your. Compliments as, always bulletins as the news, 789 00:53:17,035 --> 00:53:20,355 Speaker 1: warrants and Remember trump is laying the groundwork now to 790 00:53:20,515 --> 00:53:25,275 Speaker 1: not leave office, later so he must be, stopped so 791 00:53:25,395 --> 00:53:28,115 Speaker 1: we will till the next one On Keith. Ulderman good, 792 00:53:28,115 --> 00:53:32,355 Speaker 1: morning good, afternoon good, night and wait for. 793 00:53:33,915 --> 00:53:34,435 Speaker 3: Good. 794 00:53:34,555 --> 00:54:04,635 Speaker 1: Luck countdown With Keith olderman is a production Of. iHeartRadio 795 00:54:05,075 --> 00:54:09,435 Speaker 1: for more podcasts From, iHeartRadio visit The iHeartRadio, App Apple, 796 00:54:09,515 --> 00:54:12,475 Speaker 1: podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts