Speaker 1: Hey, what's up man? What's your name?
Speaker 2: Peyton? How's going Miss Forever?
Speaker 1: Uh, Peyton, It's going actually pretty okay.
Speaker 3: Man.
Speaker 1: I know I've been talking a lot on here about
Speaker 1: being insane, but you know, today today I feel less insane.
Speaker 1: I don't know what it is. I think it's about.
Speaker 2: I don't know.
Speaker 1: I kind of got off my procrastination a little bit today.
Speaker 1: I cleaned my room, I reoriented myself. I fucking I
Speaker 1: feel like by myself a little bit more today than
Speaker 1: I have in the past month or so. So that's good.
Speaker 1: I've I've convinced myself that everything's gonna be okay. I
Speaker 1: don't need to freak out.
Speaker 2: I was.
Speaker 4: I was.
Speaker 1: I was stuck in a bit of a loop about
Speaker 1: like I tell me if this is crazy to you,
Speaker 1: if I'm talking crazy, but like you ever like look
Speaker 1: at a mirror and you're like, what am I? What
Speaker 1: is the or like you get you get?
Speaker 4: You ever? Get?
Speaker 5: You ever? Go on?
Speaker 1: You ever go on to like you know, you know
Speaker 1: that spiral that you can go down of. Like what
Speaker 1: am I experiencing right now in terms of just like consciousness?
Speaker 1: Like what the hell am I experiencing right now? As
Speaker 1: a conscious human being. This is the most fucking psychedelic,
Speaker 1: insane thing, you know, I don't. You know what's funny
Speaker 1: is I'm talking to you about it right now, but
Speaker 1: I don't. I don't in this moment, in this in
Speaker 1: this moment, I don't feel it, you know what I mean?
Speaker 1: This past weekend, when I was really fucking depressed and
Speaker 1: really fucking spiraling, I was like feeling that. And it's
Speaker 1: a crazy intense thing to really be feeling because because
Speaker 1: when you're feeling it, right, and then you look around
Speaker 1: at everyone else who's not feeling it, uh, and you know,
Speaker 1: like or like you're on Instagram and someone's posting about like, uh,
Speaker 1: you know, oh check it out the trailer for the
Speaker 1: news Star Wars whatever, and you're just like, do you understand?
Speaker 1: Do you have any idea? How does how is everyone
Speaker 1: not freaking out all the time?
Speaker 2: You know?
Speaker 1: How does society not How are we as conscious beings
Speaker 1: not questioning this and letting this completely run our lives
Speaker 1: at all time? And That's how I felt when I
Speaker 1: was in it. And now as I'm talking to you,
Speaker 1: I don't even feel in that right now. I just
Speaker 1: feel kind of normal. And now I just think at
Speaker 1: the other end, it's like, no, the guy he's like
Speaker 1: the guy on this the schizophrenic guy on the street
Speaker 1: who is arguing about consciousness and saying things are like,
Speaker 1: you know, talking about like woo woo shit is probably right.
Speaker 1: But also in a way, you know, the guy who's like,
Speaker 1: let's get dinner at this restaurant and then go home
Speaker 1: and watch White Lotus and then I'm gonna and then
Speaker 1: I gotta go to work tomorrow and whatever, you know,
Speaker 1: I don't whatever normal whatever normal life looks like. You know,
Speaker 1: they're both right in some way. I think it's it's
Speaker 1: terrifying to really feel deep in your own existential questioning.
Speaker 1: It's to really be like, what the fuck am I?
Speaker 1: What the fuck is this is? There's a tremendous sadness
Speaker 1: and fear and uncertainty that is inherent to every human
Speaker 1: life by nature of the fact that, uh, we die
Speaker 1: and what what the hell we're experiencing ends and we're
Speaker 1: never going to actually have answers to all these questions.
Speaker 1: And it's nobody escapes from that. Whether you're rich or
Speaker 1: you're poor, or you're born new whatever, you never escape
Speaker 1: from that. And when you're really in it. It drives
Speaker 1: you insane that other people are not. Like It's like
Speaker 1: you're in like a war or something, and the guy
Speaker 1: next to you is like filing his nails and you're like,
Speaker 1: what how not seeing all this? Are you insane? Anyway?
Speaker 1: But I feel actually okay by the way that whole
Speaker 1: I just want you to know, that whole rant, aside,
Speaker 1: that whole ranch, aside, that whole rant, is exactly how
Speaker 1: I have been feeling for the past three days. But
Speaker 1: in this very moment, I actually feel pretty good. So no,
Speaker 1: that's good, man.
Speaker 2: And the great thing about that, about the extra trying
Speaker 2: to say something for that rant, man, is that the
Speaker 2: best thing you do, man, is really only you can
Speaker 2: really answer that right, Like I said, like it's a
Speaker 2: it's a it's a extrace of you looking in the
Speaker 2: mirroratives you know, not anybody else is gonna know anything
Speaker 2: else about it. So m but uh no, Man, I'll
Speaker 2: call to talk to you today about mister Trevor is
Speaker 2: a man. Ah. I feel unique, right, We all feel unique.
Speaker 2: Like you said, you feel unique in your own crisis,
Speaker 2: and my crisis more or less is uh Man, I
Speaker 2: have a weird thing going on. I'm a thirty two
Speaker 2: year old male man, and uh, I just feel like,
Speaker 2: at the end of the day, uh, man, being alone
Speaker 2: is kind of weird. But I have a special exception.
Speaker 2: I'm hated on both sides of my family for something
Speaker 2: that I don't know. I've had a really bad ADHD
Speaker 2: so I was a kid man, and me being alone,
Speaker 2: separated with my mother from all my family probably didn't
Speaker 2: help a lot of that when I was young, and
Speaker 2: I've met my cousins here later on in my life,
Speaker 2: twenty years later in my life for me being that
Speaker 2: and man, I don't really have a lot of people
Speaker 2: to talk to me being an older child, and like
Speaker 2: I said, me being with my mom doesn't really help
Speaker 2: that a lot. Man. I think that's a big case
Speaker 2: of a unique case of I guess you say Stockholm syndrome.
Speaker 2: I guess not saying that my mom was abusing me,
Speaker 2: but me only being with my mother for twenty plus
Speaker 2: years of my life and not knowing any other family
Speaker 2: or friends right didn't really help my my my my
Speaker 2: social anxiety or that of ades, and on top of
Speaker 2: that ac ades a lot of depressions. So uh, with that, man,
Speaker 2: I just I hate I hate myself a lot for
Speaker 2: that because uh, I guess I didn't really find out
Speaker 2: any other avenues or things that could have could have
Speaker 2: helped me, right, And it's not to say that I
Speaker 2: wasn't reaching or trying to go to other people, and
Speaker 2: eventually I did at some point, right, but uh uh,
Speaker 2: like you said, man, looking yourself and seeing in that mirror,
Speaker 2: man is is uh is quite h depth defined. I
Speaker 2: guess you could say, Uh, I guess to that point,
Speaker 2: and uh, man, I don't uh, I don't know how
Speaker 2: to help myself for help any way to get out
Speaker 2: of that.
Speaker 1: Well, well, lets well listen, listen, listen. I have I
Speaker 1: actually have tons of questions, uh for you, and I
Speaker 1: actually genuinely I would love to talk to you about this.
Speaker 1: I want to just kind of first preface by saying,
Speaker 1: as you know, I am not a real therapist. I
Speaker 1: am an insane man in a gecko costume. I'm curious.
Speaker 1: I actually do want to talk to you about this
Speaker 1: because I have I have a lot of questions and
Speaker 1: you seem like a cool guy and I'm down to
Speaker 1: talk to you. But I want to know have you
Speaker 1: spoken to a real therapist about this? And if you
Speaker 1: have what do they say.
Speaker 2: Uh No, I haven't actually spoke a real therapist about
Speaker 2: this because because man, well I'm low income. I don't
Speaker 2: have a lot of income and stuff like that to
Speaker 2: actually go to see therapy and stuff like that. Man.
Speaker 2: So I've tried to talk to my family, and well,
Speaker 2: you know, as I told you, man, both, a lot
Speaker 2: of my family they hate me for something in the
Speaker 2: past that I cannot explain or don't don't even don't
Speaker 2: even know myself for what I did. Right, I've had
Speaker 2: very limited, very I've had very limited contact with my family.
Speaker 2: So and I guess in the moments that I've had
Speaker 2: contact with them, they don't want do anything with me
Speaker 2: or or even accept me.
Speaker 1: So okay, all right, well okay, so let me say
Speaker 1: this is you know, yeah, look, I know it's hard
Speaker 1: to get I know, I know it can be like
Speaker 1: fucking expensive and annoying to talk to a real therapist.
Speaker 1: I do believe that you should. Fuck I think there's
Speaker 1: ways that you can like go to like a college
Speaker 1: campus to talk to a therapist for free. This one's
Speaker 1: kind of controversial, but I do it. It's uh, I
Speaker 1: use chat GBT as a therapist. A lot of the time.
Speaker 1: I don't know where that leads. I don't know if
Speaker 1: they're taking my deepest, darkest personal things and using it
Speaker 1: to selling it to Amazon. I do not know. That
Speaker 1: could totally possibly be happening. That's just what I do.
Speaker 1: But all right, anyway, you know what, look, man, let's
Speaker 1: let's let's okay. I'm curious about a few things. And
Speaker 1: again you stuck to real therapists about this. But I
Speaker 1: guess in the meantime, we can as as as your homie,
Speaker 1: we can just chit chat.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: What so did your family drop you all at once?
Speaker 1: Or was this like a gradual thing?
Speaker 2: This is like a gradual thing, I guess from what
Speaker 2: I told, man, because, uh, you know what's weird, man,
Speaker 2: because I could just share this, Man, about two years ago,
Speaker 2: I was having surgery. I was getting my I had
Speaker 2: some stomach issues and I did have my stomach pumped
Speaker 2: and I had to have my gallbladder removed. But man,
Speaker 2: I haven't seen my grandma since then, since like my
Speaker 2: my high school graduation, right, had I hadn't seen her since?
Speaker 5: Right?
Speaker 2: She just comes out of the blue and she's like, hey,
Speaker 2: She's like, you know, I could take you to your surgery.
Speaker 2: You know, I haven't really been there in your life, right,
Speaker 2: And uh, it's funny, man, I was coming out, I
Speaker 2: was coming out of surgery, and she sat there with me,
Speaker 2: and we sat there for a couple hours. She just
Speaker 2: wanted to make sure I was okay to recuperate after surgery,
Speaker 2: and she was like, hey, she was like, I am
Speaker 2: very sorry about everything that's happened towards you. Right. She
Speaker 2: was like, I look at you now, and I think
Speaker 2: we were wrong about judging you as a kid, right,
Speaker 2: because we didn't know how you would turn out, and
Speaker 2: you turned out to be an awesome person. It's just
Speaker 2: that you don't seem as bright because of how we
Speaker 2: treated you. And I just want to say, on the
Speaker 2: on the whim of another man, right, It's basically how
Speaker 2: she put it. And she was like for that, I'm sorry,
Speaker 2: and she like dropped me off of my house afterwards, right,
Speaker 2: And uh, I guess, I guess, man, like, like, uh
Speaker 2: it kind of at the time I was really drugged up.
Speaker 2: But at the time, man, I could just remember that much. Man,
Speaker 2: And he didn't shake me to my core until like,
Speaker 2: I don't know, I guess later that year, right when
Speaker 2: upon me remembering it. So I don't know, man, Like
Speaker 2: I don't even know where I was going with that, honestly,
Speaker 2: I guess.
Speaker 1: Well, okay, So so from from what you were telling
Speaker 1: me earlier, I guess what I understand is that you
Speaker 1: felt like growing up and like even like into your
Speaker 1: twenties and shit, you were isolated your mom and so
Speaker 1: you just kind of had that relationship with your mom
Speaker 1: and didn't really like have the opportunity, I guess, to
Speaker 1: go out and have relationships with people outside of that.
Speaker 5: Is that what you were saying?
Speaker 2: Yeah, pretty much. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Interesting, It's this is a total aside, but you like
Speaker 1: you seem like a confident guy just over the phone.
Speaker 1: I don't know what it is. Do you feel confident?
Speaker 2: No, man, I mean I mean, if you want to know, man, recently,
Speaker 2: man I had recently? Man, If I sound confident right now? Man,
Speaker 2: it's the meds really good. Yeah. I finally got some
Speaker 2: medication about about two weeks ago. So you know, yeah,
Speaker 2: so I'm coming in a better place now than I
Speaker 2: wasn't then. But you know, uh, right now, you know,
Speaker 2: the man's are kicking in.
Speaker 1: So so all right, so you said you were like
Speaker 1: kind of like it was just you and your mom
Speaker 1: for a while, but now you don't talk to any
Speaker 1: of your family? How how long ago? How many years
Speaker 1: ago did it stop being just you and your mom
Speaker 1: and it started being just you?
Speaker 2: Uh? Three years ago? Yeah, it started being in just me?
Speaker 1: What are you do? You live in an apartment alone?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah, okay, yeah I live in an apartment alone.
Speaker 1: Can I ask what?
Speaker 4: Uh?
Speaker 1: You don't have to, don't give me your fucking address,
Speaker 1: but like what state or city?
Speaker 2: Uh? Texas?
Speaker 1: Cool?
Speaker 2: All right?
Speaker 1: Cool? Cool? And do you work?
Speaker 2: Yeah? I'll work currently on the work now, I'm on
Speaker 2: my break.
Speaker 1: This word and I guess your main problem you're telling
Speaker 1: me is like, is like isolation.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's isolation. Man like, it sucks, man Like. Imagine
Speaker 2: having ADHD man, you know, and being by yourself. You know, Uh,
Speaker 2: it could be very challenging. You know, things that things
Speaker 2: that don't excite you bore you. And then that boring,
Speaker 2: that boringness, that imptiness that I feel is not because
Speaker 2: I want to feel that way, but it's like the ADHD.
Speaker 2: And then it just comes with like a very dark
Speaker 2: depression that the words and there's nothing really to perk
Speaker 2: me up. Forever bring me out of that, because I
Speaker 2: don't have anything socially to spark me or something to
Speaker 2: spark me to kind of bring that. Yeah, there's reading.
Speaker 2: I could do gaming, right, but after a while, man,
Speaker 2: you know those those things don't don't help you, like
Speaker 2: like like socializing good, I guess and the top of
Speaker 2: all off man. To make it even further, man, like
Speaker 2: I met my dad when I was when I was
Speaker 2: twenty four, right. That was because I didn't know him.
Speaker 2: I didn't know anything about my dad till then. But
Speaker 2: I met him when I was twenty four, man, And man,
Speaker 2: it's crazy. When I met him, he was like, hey, man,
Speaker 2: Uh you know, God happened into my life. Right. He
Speaker 2: was like, God happened to me man, and and with you.
Speaker 2: I want to make sure that you know because I
Speaker 2: do have other brothers. I do have other siblings. Papa
Speaker 2: was a roma stone just kind of give you a
Speaker 2: little back background, but he was like, man, I want
Speaker 2: to come back into your life man and make sure
Speaker 2: that you're okay. Uh that go well yeah at all?
Speaker 5: Uh?
Speaker 2: Well?
Speaker 3: Uh.
Speaker 2: Number one, he had a lot of troubles that he
Speaker 2: was dealing with, right. Uh. In the main purpose of
Speaker 2: what what he was trying to do at the time
Speaker 2: was trying to take me take him off of child support,
Speaker 2: right because he still hadn't had the time to pay it.
Speaker 2: And uh you know, uh, if I had to be
Speaker 2: honest with you, uh it was like four other four
Speaker 2: other kids, right, he had to pay child support for.
Speaker 2: So you know, being that guy and being in Texas
Speaker 2: your whole life, right, you know, that can very much
Speaker 2: add up, and he's trying to pay it all back.
Speaker 2: So uh so his his biggest his biggest progative or
Speaker 2: his biggest goal. Man was like a man like, let's
Speaker 2: not let's not. Uh, let's not try to pay this man.
Speaker 2: You know, I got into your life, you know for
Speaker 2: about a two months. Man, can you tell your mom
Speaker 2: to take me up? Child support? Was his biggest thing. Man.
Speaker 2: I was like, my doggar can't can't ask that. Man.
Speaker 2: My mom doesn't want to talk to you. So you know,
Speaker 2: you just you just what you're which you're what you
Speaker 2: got to do man, And yeah, man, it just it
Speaker 2: just seems like like I said, the reason why I'm I, uh,
Speaker 2: I appreciate you man, Like it it's really positive hearing
Speaker 2: that man from you man saying now I sound like
Speaker 2: a confident guy. I guess that comes from me being
Speaker 2: uh uh the job that I've taken.
Speaker 1: Right, that's what's your what's your job?
Speaker 5: Uh?
Speaker 2: Right now I'm a security guard uh at a college campus,
Speaker 2: which is pretty crazy that you uh uh but uh
Speaker 2: manh yeah, I've been a salesman most of my life.
Speaker 2: So I guess that's where the talking and the confidence
Speaker 2: come from.
Speaker 1: Okay, interesting, So you had a lot of like, uh,
Speaker 1: I guess these these are would you consider both of
Speaker 1: those to be people facing jobs?
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, very much.
Speaker 4: So okay, because.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you don't sound like talking to you. You don't
Speaker 1: sound like you've been you know, locked in a room
Speaker 1: for thirty two years. You sound like you know, to talk.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, no no, uh like I said, uh, I
Speaker 2: haven't really gone to many play but like I said,
Speaker 2: the places that I tend to do, man, I try
Speaker 2: to be try to be very proud about it, and
Speaker 2: you know, I try to be positive about things at first,
Speaker 2: like every know a human being. But man, it's just
Speaker 2: you know, it does not always turn out like that.
Speaker 2: I guess.
Speaker 1: So h, I mean, if we can talk about this,
Speaker 1: so yeah, the whole like I'm I am no psychotherapist,
Speaker 1: and I don't know anything about all these whatever, but
Speaker 1: I I like the like ADHD. I I don't know
Speaker 1: if I formally have ADHD, but I guess I have
Speaker 1: some whatever the fuck ADHD. Definitely know I have some
Speaker 1: formal or not. I understand the feelings of ADHD and depression,
Speaker 1: and I understand everything you were just talking about of
Speaker 1: like you get bored and you're boredom spirals into like
Speaker 1: a crazy depression, and you know, all spirals into all
Speaker 1: the ship. I was just ranting to you about the
Speaker 1: beginning of the call. I know what that feeling is.
Speaker 2: Like, yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1: I have thoughts because I personally struggle with that feeling
Speaker 1: and try to figure out how to fucking attack it.
Speaker 1: And so you're you feel like completely is it? You
Speaker 1: feel completely isolated? Y You don't feel like you have
Speaker 1: any you have like any friends or any family or
Speaker 1: anyone that you know at all.
Speaker 5: No.
Speaker 2: Man, if someone will be honest with you, man, just
Speaker 2: tun this car Man just level which one hundred Man.
Speaker 2: Sometimes Man, I just I want to die, man, because
Speaker 2: it's like as a as a thirty year old male
Speaker 2: man with no friends or no real prerogative man, I'm
Speaker 2: just trying trying to get it. Man. It just sucks,
Speaker 2: especially now in the USA. Right, Ris tax.
Speaker 1: What's what's your what's your name again?
Speaker 2: Peyton?
Speaker 1: Peyton? And you live do you live in one of
Speaker 1: the near one of the near big city Peyton?
Speaker 2: Uh, I used to live in Dallas, but right now, man,
Speaker 2: I'm currently closer off to Palestine.
Speaker 1: Right Falastine. Okay, do you have any do any hobbies?
Speaker 1: Do you do you have any hobbies? Do you have
Speaker 1: any like interests of any kind?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Man? Uh uh for uh before I didn't have
Speaker 2: enough money to do it because I'm uh uh because
Speaker 2: I'm diabetic. Man, I have to pay a lot for
Speaker 2: for that out of pocket. But uh, before that happened, Man,
Speaker 2: I used to be a really big Uh.
Speaker 5: I was.
Speaker 2: I was trying. I was trying to learn how to
Speaker 2: code and getting into into to the PC life of things, man,
Speaker 2: because Uh, basically I've been I've been a tech whiz,
Speaker 2: a little bit of a tech wiz my whole life.
Speaker 2: So uh, getting things like I had to do man. Uh,
Speaker 2: you know the craziest thing I used to have to
Speaker 2: do man as a kid man to pay for my lunch. Uh,
Speaker 2: you remember lime Wire.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you would you download music from lime Wire?
Speaker 2: Yeah? I would have a low music from lime Wire
Speaker 2: and uh, kids where I was, where I used to
Speaker 2: go to school at uh, they didn't have computers or
Speaker 2: like the availability to burn CDs. So I would like, uh,
Speaker 2: every Friday, man, you know, because music would drop or
Speaker 2: a mixtape wer drop. I would burn CDs uh from
Speaker 2: my lunch money, man, and try to like spread it
Speaker 2: out for as much as I can. Because I wasn't
Speaker 2: a gangster and nothing like that.
Speaker 5: Man.
Speaker 2: I couldn't like, you know, join a gang and be
Speaker 2: like ah, yeah, let me tell drugs or do things
Speaker 2: like that. Man. I had to find out that happened
Speaker 2: us to do things. Man. So burning movies and CDs
Speaker 2: are like my big my biggest thing.
Speaker 1: So let's okay, So let's I want to focus on
Speaker 1: the isolation stuff. So what what's your day look like?
Speaker 1: How How many hours a week are you work?
Speaker 2: I'm at work at least twelve hours a.
Speaker 1: Day twelve oh shit, five days a week.
Speaker 2: Yeah, five days a week, yes, sir, twelve.
Speaker 1: Hours a day, five days a week. Do you talk
Speaker 1: to anyone at work? Do you have any coworkers that you.
Speaker 2: Like I had, I had a partner, but he recently
Speaker 2: his mom just recently had a stroke. So it's kind
Speaker 2: of made me here the last three weeks.
Speaker 1: Oh so you're fucking dude, what do you You're security
Speaker 1: guard on a college campus and you're doing the whole
Speaker 1: thing alone.
Speaker 4: Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, oh yeah.
Speaker 1: I mean, look, I know what. I know how it
Speaker 1: feels to fucking have no feel like you have no
Speaker 1: coworkers and no roommates and like it yeah, just fucking
Speaker 1: being isolated. Yeah it's not I totally, I totally totally
Speaker 1: understand that that is not a fun way to live.
Speaker 1: But I, I mean, I just have I have thoughts
Speaker 1: for you. One is like, well, let's get this out
Speaker 1: of the way first. One is, again, I've only been
Speaker 1: talking to you for like twenty minutes, but you seem
Speaker 1: like a really nice, really confident, good dude. So you know,
Speaker 1: whether or not, you know, I I hope you see
Speaker 1: yourself that way. If you don't see yourself that way,
Speaker 1: know that it is possible for other people to see
Speaker 1: you that way, because that's just how you're coming off
Speaker 1: to me. I'm not lying to you. I'm not blown
Speaker 1: smoke up your ass. You come off to me as
Speaker 1: a confident, nice guy. And so if you were, I
Speaker 1: would I don't, I wouldn't. I would be more nervous
Speaker 1: having this phone call with you if I thought you
Speaker 1: were a completely insane person that was incapable of making friends,
Speaker 1: which I don't think you are. That I appreciate that,
Speaker 1: I would be that would concern me more. This would
Speaker 1: be a more. This would be a more. This would
Speaker 1: be a sad call if that's the energy you were
Speaker 1: giving off. But it's not. I think you're a good uh.
Speaker 1: You seem like a nice hang. So the other thing is, well, okay,
Speaker 1: how can we have there be some fork in your
Speaker 1: day or your road or your routine, right because I
Speaker 1: assume every day you're pretty much doing the same thing
Speaker 1: of like, you know, wake up, go to work, get tired.
Speaker 2: You know. Is that to say, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 2: the routine, the American dream, I guess, yeah yeah yeah yeah.
Speaker 1: And it's like, how within whatever means you have available
Speaker 1: even if it's like, even if it's not something huge
Speaker 1: or crazy, but how within whatever means you have whatever
Speaker 1: money you have, whatever time you have, whatever resources you have.
Speaker 1: You know, if we really honestly look at whatever resources
Speaker 1: we have and see if maybe there's something we're not seeing.
Speaker 1: How within when what you're able to do, can you
Speaker 1: branch out to something where you are meeting new people,
Speaker 1: having new life experiences, and getting your brain out of
Speaker 1: the fog so that your brain goes, oh, you know what,
Speaker 1: I actually my life does not need to be constant,
Speaker 1: awful despair. I of course my brain was gonna think
Speaker 1: that this whole time, because I was giving my brain
Speaker 1: no evidence to consider fucking otherwise, because I was just
Speaker 1: in my daily routine, and the result of my daily
Speaker 1: routine was my brain thinking that, you know, life is
Speaker 1: gonna be insane and horrible forever. So how do I
Speaker 1: put a little fork in the fucking road to at
Speaker 1: least get do the smallest little thing to maybe get
Speaker 1: get or get no room, or have a conversation, or
Speaker 1: do something more to give my brain the chance to go, Okay,
Speaker 1: maybe maybe there's something new here that we didn't even
Speaker 1: fucking think about. So we just skipped straight to all
Speaker 1: the most horrible conclusions because we didn't even consider that
Speaker 1: our life could look any different until hey, look, here's
Speaker 1: some evidence that maybe it can.
Speaker 2: Uh, Man, if you want to be honest with you, Man,
Speaker 2: I just recently just got a notification like twenty minutes
Speaker 2: for you called h I picked up a dating app.
Speaker 2: I tried to I tried to tried to talk to something. Man.
Speaker 2: I'm not like really looking for dating because but yeah,
Speaker 2: I tried to try to pick up some things, man,
Speaker 2: try to talk to some people.
Speaker 6: Man.
Speaker 2: I don't really do social media too much because, uh,
Speaker 2: because you know, man, there's there's so much negative propaganda
Speaker 2: and and fake news and things like that. Man, So
Speaker 2: I tried. I tried my best not to try not
Speaker 2: to be on doom scrolling and things like that. But
Speaker 2: uh uh yeah, I picked up a dating gap man,
Speaker 2: and tried to selectively talk to certain people, man, or
Speaker 2: try to reach out to certain people. Man, try to
Speaker 2: see what's that man, say you know, hello, how you doing?
Speaker 2: Oh do you want to chat? You know, and things
Speaker 2: like that. I mean, that's all I've done recently, distrust
Speaker 2: to try to maneuver my way out to things, and
Speaker 2: I I mean not particularly well.
Speaker 1: I guess I will say, by the way, by the way,
Speaker 1: full full disclaim. By the way, if I could just
Speaker 1: give a generous disclaimer, not just to you, but to
Speaker 1: anyone listening to this podcast. If you're depressed and feel
Speaker 1: like you want to die, I highly recommend not downloading
Speaker 1: a dating app. Highly highly recommend. I if you walk
Speaker 1: around I'm I want. Everything I say is from absolute
Speaker 1: personal experience. I swear on my life to that if
Speaker 1: you're depressed and want to die, the absolute last thing
Speaker 1: you need to do is get on Hinge, your Tinder.
Speaker 1: It is, it is at should be at the bottom
Speaker 1: of your to do list. Again, I say that from experience,
Speaker 1: because you know those apps are just designed to make
Speaker 1: you fucking want to kill yourself.
Speaker 2: Ah yeah, man, yeah, I mean, like I said, I
Speaker 2: just like my first time picking up a dating app,
Speaker 2: I just I tried it. I didn't do Tender because
Speaker 2: I've heard, you know, I've seen tender stories and I've
Speaker 2: read I've read things on I'm rated about Tender.
Speaker 1: But but you know, well, I guess well I will
Speaker 1: I will say. I know, I just said, uh to
Speaker 1: not do that, but even but you know what fucking
Speaker 1: even doing that? If you're like trying to break your
Speaker 1: loop in in the smallest way possible, downloading a dating
Speaker 1: apps not a horrible way to break your fucking loop.
Speaker 1: I mean, there's right, it could send you into a
Speaker 1: different loop that's you know, makes you feel you know,
Speaker 1: shitty and depressed. But I don't know, man, Like is
Speaker 1: there any you talked about wanting to code? And like,
Speaker 1: I don't know even like I don't know, man, even
Speaker 1: these days, like getting involved in like an online community
Speaker 1: like if if if you really don't want to leave
Speaker 1: your house so you really don't feel like you have
Speaker 1: the resources to go super far outside of your house,
Speaker 1: you can even fucking join a coding discord group or
Speaker 1: something and try to make some online friends. I'm just
Speaker 1: I guess I'm just trying to.
Speaker 2: Say that I haven't I haven't done anything like that.
Speaker 2: I guess.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I guess I'm trying. I'm just trying to say,
Speaker 1: you know, like because look, I just want I'm just
Speaker 1: saying this. Look I'm not I'm not a real therapist.
Speaker 1: And I and I I also struggle with like, uh,
Speaker 1: you know, wanting to die and like feeling inside all
Speaker 1: the time. And I just these are just things I
Speaker 1: tell myself, man. The things I just tell myself are like,
Speaker 1: you know, every day I wake up, I'm just gonna pick.
Speaker 1: Maybe I'm gonna keep picking. Maybe I'm gonna keep trying
Speaker 1: new things, and I just I just keep trying to
Speaker 1: be optimistic and be like, you know, there's so much
Speaker 1: ship to try before, there's so so much more yeah,
Speaker 1: ship to try before fully giving up and going you know, Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm just destined to be miserable forever. Yeah, this is
Speaker 1: just what I tell myself. I don't know if it
Speaker 1: if it is, I don't know. I don't know if
Speaker 1: it's if it's true. I guess you can decide if
Speaker 1: it's true. But that's just how I feel. This is
Speaker 1: a lot to try before resigning to the idea that
Speaker 1: you're going to be miserable forever. So I'm inclined. I
Speaker 1: want to join the living. I hope you also feel
Speaker 1: empowered to join the living. Whatever the fuck that looks
Speaker 1: like to you, or whatever you think that feels like
Speaker 1: to you.
Speaker 2: Just on a on a positive note, manage. I just
Speaker 2: want to put it out there. Man, I'm a I'm
Speaker 2: one month over.
Speaker 1: Congratulations. Congratulations.
Speaker 2: Yeah, man, trust me, trying new things, like you said,
Speaker 2: and I'm trying to just not I guess, like you said,
Speaker 2: like trying not to be in the gutter. Uh. Yeah,
Speaker 2: I'm I'm Alma made right. So I guess we're we're
Speaker 2: we're you know, we're trying to we're trying to go
Speaker 2: in the right direction, right, Yeah, So trust me, man,
Speaker 2: I'm I'm trying to be right there with you. Man,
Speaker 2: one little thing at the time. Man, I appreciate So.
Speaker 7: Man, what else but no, Man, No, but it's and
Speaker 7: then uh, because I've been I've been a long un
Speaker 7: I saw your interally enough man.
Speaker 5: Uh.
Speaker 2: Somebody referred me to you on Instagram. Man, and I've
Speaker 2: just been watching man and seeing seeing little things man.
Speaker 2: From from everything you do, Man, it inspires me. Man,
Speaker 2: Like as I said, that's why I called you. Man.
Speaker 2: And if if it's if anything to leave on guys
Speaker 2: like you said, Man, just I guess and just try
Speaker 2: try new things. Man. That's the best thing I can
Speaker 2: tell y'all. Man, I appreciate, Man, but I'm gonna go. Man,
Speaker 2: it's about all right. I appreciate it.
Speaker 1: Good good good luck, Peyton, Okay, I'm I'm I'm sincerely,
Speaker 1: I'm rooting for you.
Speaker 2: Yeah, thank you man. It describe to this channel, y'all. Please,
Speaker 2: this is a great channel.
Speaker 1: Thank you, Thank you Payton, Thank you Payton. All Right,
Speaker 1: have a good one Bye Bye. I like that guy
Speaker 1: a lot. He was he was really seems like a
Speaker 1: nice fucking guy. Yeah, he really seems like a nice,
Speaker 1: fun guy. I just I empathize. I got it. Just
Speaker 1: I understand a lot of what that ship fucking feels like.
Speaker 1: I don't know what I've been feeling like. I mean,
Speaker 1: I was ranting for at the beginning of this phone call.
Speaker 1: I was feeling kind of like that for the past
Speaker 1: a little while. Today, in this very moment, I feel
Speaker 1: good though, which is great. It's cool. When you get
Speaker 1: out of a hole, you're like, oh, I didn't realize that.
Speaker 1: I It's like like when you get out of a hole,
Speaker 1: you're like, oh, I I have not fully lost myself.
Speaker 1: I am still here. It's like, I don't know. I
Speaker 1: have this thing whenever I get sick, like I have
Speaker 1: I get a cold, I'm like, well, this is forever now,
Speaker 1: this is permanent. Your brain just convinces your brains are crazy.
Speaker 1: I don't know. Okay, that was That was a lot
Speaker 1: of real therapy. Well not real. That was a lot
Speaker 1: of fake real therapy. But I enjoy I enjoyed talking
Speaker 1: to Peyton. Do I have anything funny to say? I
Speaker 1: feel like I used to say funny things. Sometimes I
Speaker 1: have something funny to say? Why do I feel like
Speaker 1: I should have more funny things to say? But I don't.
Speaker 1: I don't. I don't really, I didn't have anything funny
Speaker 1: to say about that. I just felt it too much
Speaker 1: in my soul.
Speaker 4: Uh.
Speaker 1: Maybe maybe it's inherently funny. I don't know. Maybe I
Speaker 1: don't need to say anything funny. All right, let's let's
Speaker 1: just all right, let's just keep going, okay, all right? Hello, Hello, Hey,
Speaker 1: what's your name?
Speaker 5: Thank It's Evan?
Speaker 1: Evan? What's up? Evan? How How can I get you today?
Speaker 5: I'm doing well. I got off of work a few
Speaker 5: hours ago. I hung out with a friend today. Yeah,
Speaker 5: I got a couple of things I want to talk about.
Speaker 5: But I did have a question before we start. Yeah, sure,
Speaker 5: what what do you think the best way to get
Speaker 5: on the phone is with you? Do you think it's
Speaker 5: just calling over and over and over again, or do
Speaker 5: you think it's like waiting for the voicemail? Or what
Speaker 5: do you think?
Speaker 1: I think the best way to get on the phone
Speaker 1: with me is probably just a call.
Speaker 5: Just call over and over again.
Speaker 1: Well, then you just call, you just press the phone.
Speaker 1: You just type your phone and you maybe you can
Speaker 1: make it okay call. What were the things you had
Speaker 1: to talk about?
Speaker 5: Well, so I'm nineteen, I'm gonna be twenty in April.
Speaker 5: I am an Eagle Scout, So I'm a big I'm
Speaker 5: a really big into the BSA. I'm a big. I
Speaker 5: like going there of the summer camp that I worked
Speaker 5: at as a BUSA camp, and I go there a
Speaker 5: lot for weekends for like volunteer events, and yeah, I
Speaker 5: just want to talk about my experience with that, Like
Speaker 5: the BSA.
Speaker 1: What that what you said the b s A. Oh boy,
Speaker 1: Scouts of America.
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, scouting. Yeah it's it's called Scouting BUSA now
Speaker 5: I think, but it's h Yeah, I just want to
Speaker 5: talk about I can't at that and just what's going
Speaker 5: on in my life?
Speaker 1: What's uh? Do you guys don't do cookies?
Speaker 2: Right?
Speaker 1: You do popcorn?
Speaker 5: Yeah? Yes, we do popcorn.
Speaker 1: We got caramel corn? Do you have the do do
Speaker 1: you guys sell the fucking tray where it's got the
Speaker 1: the butt, the butter popcorn, the cheese, the orange cheese popcorn,
Speaker 1: the white cheddar popcorn, and the caramel popcorn? Do you guys,
Speaker 1: do that the tray.
Speaker 5: I'm not sure what you mean.
Speaker 1: No, it's all right, it's not a tray. It's oh,
Speaker 1: it's a bucket. I'm sorry, I don't know. I said
Speaker 1: a tray. It's a bucket.
Speaker 5: Oh. Yeah, the big the big tin of yeah, the
Speaker 5: big metal.
Speaker 1: Ten that's why. Yeah, the big metal tin. And it's
Speaker 1: got a little wighter that's supposed to divide all the
Speaker 1: different kinds of popcorn. But what I usually end up
Speaker 1: doing is just mixing them all together so that you
Speaker 1: get a lot of diverse flavors.
Speaker 5: But that is the way to do it. There's a
Speaker 5: iten't called the classic trio. It's like caramel corn cheddar
Speaker 5: and I think white cheddar, and that's the best. I
Speaker 5: think that's the best combo. And then you put it
Speaker 5: on the tin and it's it's, oh my gosh, that's
Speaker 5: the best. That's the best. I can. I love that
Speaker 5: one so much. I don't sell anymore, obviously because I'm
Speaker 5: over eighteen. But when I did, it was very I
Speaker 5: still go around and buy sometimes because I'm I'm a
Speaker 5: little bit of a fiend for it.
Speaker 1: I will say, all right, so tell me boy scouts,
Speaker 1: good bad.
Speaker 5: I really like it as growing up. I grew up
Speaker 5: with the program, so I think I started when I
Speaker 5: was in second grade, and I absolutely love it. It's
Speaker 5: it's really fun for me to have somewhere to go.
Speaker 5: So I I live in Wisconsin, and there's a saying
Speaker 5: called up north here. It's like I'm going up north
Speaker 5: for the weekend, and that's like the saying here. But yeah,
Speaker 5: so I get to go up north to camp in Wisconsin,
Speaker 5: and I for the weekend activities. It's usually like a
Speaker 5: volunteer weekend, so we do a lot of like volunteer work.
Speaker 5: Like it's one weekend I was doing conduit and like
Speaker 5: bumbing stuff and putting together pipes and all that, and
Speaker 5: then the next weekend I was doing some carpentry, like
Speaker 5: cutting wood to the certain measurements that they wanted and
Speaker 5: doing all that stuff. And the next weekend I was
Speaker 5: doing some like I think we're poring concrete that weekend,
Speaker 5: and I learned how to do that, and I actually
Speaker 5: the head ranger took me on a trip to Iowa
Speaker 5: this past weekend and I learned how to use the chainsaw. There,
Speaker 5: slept safely and I got a certain there's a bunch
Speaker 5: of BSA certifications that you can get it. And I
Speaker 5: got a certification and i can certifiably use a chainsaw,
Speaker 5: and I'm very proud of that.
Speaker 1: That's pretty cool. Yeah, well, okay, what's the what's the
Speaker 1: most which which b s A certification? Are you the
Speaker 1: most proud of.
Speaker 5: The most proud of part of the chainsaw? That was
Speaker 5: pretty cool. I really enjoyed doing that. But there's there's
Speaker 5: just a bunch of experiences that you can get for
Speaker 5: the b s A. Like there was one time when
Speaker 5: me and my me and my troop went to Washington,
Speaker 5: d C. And we spent We just spent like a
Speaker 5: week out there. It was so much fun. I got
Speaker 5: to do the whole mall and I got to go
Speaker 5: see the smoke Smithsonians and everything. It was very cool
Speaker 5: mm hmm. And then there was another there was another
Speaker 5: time with my troop where we went to the Boundary
Speaker 5: waters in like Lake Superior. I really enjoyed that. It's
Speaker 5: a very Oh my gosh, it's so pretty up there.
Speaker 5: I love it so much. But yeah, I really like
Speaker 5: it because it's it's it's good to have some place
Speaker 5: to go on the weekends other than like you know,
Speaker 5: partying or like, you know, sitting at home watching tiktoks
Speaker 5: all weekend. It's not I don't. I don't like doing
Speaker 5: that on the weekends, you know, just doom scrolling. It's
Speaker 5: really it's it's a big problem for me. I don't like.
Speaker 5: I don't.
Speaker 1: Yeah, what's what's your TikTok algorithm looking like? These days?
Speaker 5: It's a lot of cars. I'm a big car guy
Speaker 5: as well. I see a lot of videos of like,
Speaker 5: I'm a big on this Honda guy. I really like
Speaker 5: on the Civics and a lot of people with turbos
Speaker 5: in them and all that kind of stuff. But I
Speaker 5: don't know, I just like, probably probably cars is the
Speaker 5: biggest thing. Yeah. Sorry, I'm kind of nervous because I
Speaker 5: was not expecting.
Speaker 2: To get on.
Speaker 1: No, don't, don't. What's your name again?
Speaker 5: Evan?
Speaker 1: Evan Evan. Now that you've graduated the Boy Scouts, what
Speaker 1: is your hopes and dreams for your life?
Speaker 5: Well, so, in the next two years, I want to
Speaker 5: go on a trip across the country. My goal was
Speaker 5: to hit every national park within a summer. Cool. I really,
Speaker 5: I really want to do that. I'm really excited as
Speaker 5: well because I have the plan all made out. I
Speaker 5: just made a really bad decision in buying the wrong
Speaker 5: vehicle because I was I was really excited out of
Speaker 5: high school to do that, and then I bought the
Speaker 5: wrong vehicle and I can't take that out across the
Speaker 5: road because it's not reliable enough to do that. So
Speaker 5: I got to wait until I pay have some debt
Speaker 5: to do that. But I'm very I really want to
Speaker 5: do that. I'm I've got like all the plans made out.
Speaker 5: I know the days I want to stand at each park,
Speaker 5: I know my food plan, I know like what I'm
Speaker 5: going to do on the road for money. I just
Speaker 5: you know, I just got to do it.
Speaker 1: Mm hmmm, yeah, nice brother. Nice You did you get
Speaker 1: to travel at all in the boy Scouts? Like, did
Speaker 1: they take your places and you do stuff? I made
Speaker 1: that sound kind of weird.
Speaker 5: No, yeah, no, there was one trip where I took.
Speaker 5: It was a pretty big event. It's called the National Jamboree.
Speaker 5: It's where every Scout in the nation can go to
Speaker 5: a place called the Summit, and it's like it's a
Speaker 5: pretty big event. I think there was fifteen thousand or
Speaker 5: twenty thousand scouts there last year, which doesn't sound like
Speaker 5: a lot, but it's when you see it in real life.
Speaker 5: It's a lot of people, I feel like. But yeah,
Speaker 5: I also I've gotten to go down to Missouri and
Speaker 5: in twenty seventeen, I went down there to go see
Speaker 5: the eclipse, the lunar or the solar eclipse, I.
Speaker 2: Think it was.
Speaker 5: That was really fun And I really like how in
Speaker 5: scouting you it's it's very intercann so like if you
Speaker 5: want to go to like, say you want to take
Speaker 5: a trip to Arizona, if you know somebody in Arizona
Speaker 5: and they like are a part of scouting, you could
Speaker 5: most likely get a weekend event and like go to Arizona,
Speaker 5: go to that camp in Arizona and stay there for
Speaker 5: a weekend, like volunteer and just see Arizona for a weekend.
Speaker 5: Or if you want to go to like main safe story,
Speaker 5: you know. But yeah, I also I work as a
Speaker 5: This is a little sidetrack, but I work as a
Speaker 5: truck driver as well. That's my like full time job.
Speaker 5: Anyway that it's not it's not over the road, but
Speaker 5: I do travel to state a whole lot. I do,
Speaker 5: Like I go over Wisconsin.
Speaker 1: Have you ever almost gotten into an accident and died.
Speaker 1: I don't know why that was the first question. I
Speaker 1: don't know why that was the first question that came
Speaker 1: to my mind, but that's that was the first question
Speaker 1: that came to my mind. Is if you ever almost
Speaker 1: gotten into an accident and died.
Speaker 5: I mean I've never gotten into an accident. I mean
Speaker 5: there's been like close calls here and there, but nothing
Speaker 5: like nothing really story worthy. But uh yeah, I deliver
Speaker 5: beer for a living, so very fun. I I liked
Speaker 5: it a lot because I'll go it's like thirty minutes
Speaker 5: to my work, and then sometimes we'll go all the
Speaker 5: way up north through like Superior, Ashland area if you
Speaker 5: know where that is, but it's all the way up there,
Speaker 5: and then we go all the way down to you know,
Speaker 5: like Lacrosse and you probably don't know, but it's it's
Speaker 5: a big area we cover. And I really liked it
Speaker 5: because I can. I listened to your podcast a lot.
Speaker 5: I think I've listened to almost like by half the episodes,
Speaker 5: which is quite tell.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I've been a big fan for a long time.
Speaker 5: I used to listen to you and you still on Reddit. Man. Yeah,
Speaker 5: I remember the Redded days. It was good.
Speaker 1: Yeah, now, redd it is, I don't know what they're doing.
Speaker 1: I mean, I do know what they're doing there there,
Speaker 1: yeah there, I know what they're doing multiple times a
Speaker 1: day every day because I'm addicted to looking at Reddit.
Speaker 1: Every time I look at it. Now it's just like
Speaker 1: some it's some new Trump Pelon thing, and I'm like,
Speaker 1: I don't want to put this in front of my
Speaker 1: face right now. Yeah, you seem like a good a
Speaker 1: good kid man. You seems like a good kid. You're
Speaker 1: driving a fucking truck and I'm honestly had no idea that.
Speaker 1: I don't know why. I thought there was an age
Speaker 1: limit to driving a truck. I thought you had to
Speaker 1: be at least forty seven years old. I didn't know that.
Speaker 1: It kind of spooks me that they let nineteen year
Speaker 1: olds drive trucks. I don't know why.
Speaker 5: It's not it's not a tractor trailer. It's just a
Speaker 5: box truck, straight box truck. But it is still a
Speaker 5: pretty large vehicle. Yeah, Wisconsin laws are weird. There's also
Speaker 5: there's a Wisconsin law where you can it's a really
Speaker 5: weird law. You can drink alcohol, like with your parents
Speaker 5: when you're under twenty one, like at a like restaurant,
Speaker 5: I think, and it's very it's a very weird los
Speaker 5: I know my cousin did that a lot with their parents.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry. I've probably asked you ten times, but my
Speaker 1: brain is not working today. What's your name again?
Speaker 5: My name is Evan.
Speaker 1: Evan, Evan Evan. Do you have any advice for people?
Speaker 2: Uh?
Speaker 1: Do you have any advice for the people? I'm tired
Speaker 1: I I this show. I have no advice for anyone today.
Speaker 1: I'm delegating the advice to you. Do you have any
Speaker 1: advice for people?
Speaker 8: My advice?
Speaker 5: My advice is the Golden rule. Treat others that want
Speaker 5: to be treated and you will get treated pretty well.
Speaker 1: And where can I buy Where can I buy that popcorn?
Speaker 5: At your local Scout council? So you're in New York, right, yeah? Yeah,
Speaker 5: So if you just look up like I think it's
Speaker 5: Northern New York councilors something. I don't know what the
Speaker 5: council is called, but it's an area that the council
Speaker 5: like works with or like controls or something, and they
Speaker 5: it's like a certain part of the city or the state,
Speaker 5: and they have troops and scouts in certain areas. But
Speaker 5: you can go to the council usually and buy popcorn
Speaker 5: from them. You don't have to like go out seeking
Speaker 5: seeking a child if you don't want to, but I
Speaker 5: you know, so you can. Yeah. Usually you can go
Speaker 5: to the council and you can just fill out a
Speaker 5: form there and the season is like three weeks in
Speaker 5: the fall. I think it's like October and November or
Speaker 5: something like that. But did you do any youth programs
Speaker 5: or anything like that?
Speaker 1: Did I do any youth programs? Oh? I did b
Speaker 1: w YO when I was a kid.
Speaker 5: What's that? Uh?
Speaker 1: Some Jewish thing where you go to a place and
Speaker 1: be Jewish. We didn't sell anything. We just went and
Speaker 1: be Jewish. And there's nothing.
Speaker 2: We did.
Speaker 8: No.
Speaker 1: We just like I would like to take a coffee
Speaker 1: cup and I would piss in it and then I
Speaker 1: would bring it into the elevator with me at this
Speaker 1: hotel that we had a conference at. Stuff like that.
Speaker 1: You know, nothing, nothing, no, no, no, no. We were
Speaker 1: just being we were just bored. I once took a glide,
Speaker 1: so we were like we were in the dining hall
Speaker 1: and I took a glass cup and I went to
Speaker 1: the bathroom and I smashed it on the ground. Uh
Speaker 1: just because it's just because well just because there was
Speaker 1: I wasn't in a reality. I didn't take it seriously.
Speaker 1: It wasn't reality to me looking back on it, you know.
Speaker 1: I mean I was fourteen, and so I wouldn't do
Speaker 1: that again.
Speaker 5: But real, would you say that you were a pretty
Speaker 5: rebellious kid.
Speaker 1: Yeah, sure, yeah, I was fairly rebellious, I would say
Speaker 1: not uh not in any like. I never like did
Speaker 1: hardcore drugs or stabbed anyone. But I was you know,
Speaker 1: I did not enjoy playing by the rules. I guess
Speaker 1: when I was a wee boy, right.
Speaker 5: Do anything notable or just here and there?
Speaker 1: Nothing that notable? I mean, what about you? What about
Speaker 1: you were your rebellious kid?
Speaker 5: I kind of was a goodie two shoes now that
Speaker 5: I'm kind of so. In high school and like middle school,
Speaker 5: I wasn't super social. I was kind of like kept
Speaker 5: to myself, and I kind of it was unfortunate, but
Speaker 5: I kind of treated it high school in middle school
Speaker 5: like a prison sentence and I was just like, I'm
Speaker 5: gonna do my time and get out kind of thing
Speaker 5: because I didn't really like school. But now that I've graduated,
Speaker 5: I reconnected with a lot of my high school friends
Speaker 5: and we go to like show and stuff. I know
Speaker 5: I'm a part of well I'm not. I don't play
Speaker 5: an instrument, but I'm a photographer for a band in
Speaker 5: my area, so I take pictures of them sometimes. I
Speaker 5: have a little film camera I use. I don't have anything.
Speaker 5: I don't have like a fifteen digital camera that I use.
Speaker 5: It's like a film camera that I found in my basement,
Speaker 5: so I use that. But I like, I like to
Speaker 5: go to their shows a lot. I like a lot
Speaker 5: of local shows. It's very it's it feels like I'm
Speaker 5: getting roots into my hometown. I guess I feel like
Speaker 5: i'm more. I feel like a sense of belonging with
Speaker 5: when I go to like local shows and local events
Speaker 5: and stuff like that. But yeah, I really.
Speaker 4: Yeah, sorry, go ahead, go ahead, No you serious?
Speaker 1: No, I had nothing I was going to say, okay, but.
Speaker 5: Yeah, no, I I.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 5: They go to a lot of shows. It's like a
Speaker 5: pop punk band, so they do a lot of heavier
Speaker 5: stuff and like fast paced, and there's a basement show
Speaker 5: or a basement venue that I go to a lot,
Speaker 5: and it's it's like it's one of those like nineteenth
Speaker 5: century basements that's like, you know, five feet tall, like
Speaker 5: all rock and concrete, and it's like if you pack
Speaker 5: sixty people in there, it's cramped. As you know. M h,
Speaker 5: I don't know. I don't know to swearing, but anyway, yeah, no,
Speaker 5: it's it's a lot of fun though it's just like
Speaker 5: pushing and shoving your friends. But yeah, I enjoy it.
Speaker 2: I'm kind of.
Speaker 4: Sorry.
Speaker 1: Go ahead, Eavan.
Speaker 5: Oh yes, sir. I kind of consider my stuff a
Speaker 5: very versatile person in that sense, like like I'm an
Speaker 5: eagle scout and I go do volunteer work and then
Speaker 5: I go, you know, take pictures for a local band
Speaker 5: that I'm a part of, and I I'm a truck driver,
Speaker 5: and I just I feel like those kinds that things
Speaker 5: are kind of I don't know that, I feel like
Speaker 5: they're kind of contradictory in my eyes. You know, I
Speaker 5: feel like you would expect the truck driver to go
Speaker 5: to local shows, and someone that goes to local shows
Speaker 5: and is like a punk rocker to go like to volunteer,
Speaker 5: you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: I mean, I don't know, Evan. You said you're only nineteen,
Speaker 1: but you're like living a full life. You're only nineteen.
Speaker 1: But you're living like a forty seven year old's life.
Speaker 1: You drive a truck, you volunteer, you're you're a good
Speaker 1: Christian whatever, whether I don't even know if you're religious,
Speaker 1: but you're a good Christian. No, no, no, I think
Speaker 1: you're I think you're doing quite well. Evan.
Speaker 2: Uh.
Speaker 1: I wouldn't change the thing.
Speaker 5: I appreciate that. Uh.
Speaker 1: Is there anything else you want to say to the
Speaker 1: people of the computer before we go?
Speaker 5: Hold on, hold on, hold on mean one six?
Speaker 1: Oh god, what have we got? What's going on? What's happening?
Speaker 5: There was hold on? So I was asking a chat
Speaker 5: a lot, trying to find ask me the jest was this,
Speaker 5: I don't want to say that finger minusly shout out
Speaker 5: to finger Ministley because he really like he helped me,
Speaker 5: he gave me. He like answered my question on how
Speaker 5: to I asked a lot how to get in and
Speaker 5: like what other people have done, and he was like
Speaker 5: answering my questions.
Speaker 1: Okay, shout out, shout up, shout up, shut out, shout
Speaker 1: out finger finger guy.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm wrong.
Speaker 1: Awesome, Well take care of him, good luck, keep doing,
Speaker 1: keep living a good life. You're you're an inspiration to
Speaker 1: You're an inspiration doing all these fucking things. At nineteen.
Speaker 1: When I was nineteen, I was running around in circles
Speaker 1: trying to make myself dizzy to get high. That's not true,
Speaker 1: but you know what I mean.
Speaker 5: H good luck, I mean all right, thank you, have
Speaker 5: a good night.
Speaker 4: Hello.
Speaker 1: Hey, Hey, what's your name?
Speaker 3: Okay, hey, my name is But if for some reason
Speaker 3: I ended up getting connected with Gecko, can I just
Speaker 3: remain pnominous?
Speaker 1: You are connected with the Gecko?
Speaker 2: Oh really?
Speaker 5: What?
Speaker 2: Hmm?
Speaker 3: Okay, well, hi, get go. I guess I guess I
Speaker 3: can't remain hidden.
Speaker 1: You can? We can. We can get rid of that
Speaker 1: name and just call you Donnie, and that's what we're
Speaker 1: gonna do. So Donnie, Okay, what's up, Donnie? How you doing?
Speaker 3: I'm good? How are you get go?
Speaker 1: I'm actually feeling pretty good right now. I don't know
Speaker 1: what it is. I don't know what's in the air,
Speaker 1: but today is actually a good day. So hopefully we
Speaker 1: can string a few of those, a few more of
Speaker 1: those together, and we'll really get somewhere. Yeah, well, what's
Speaker 1: going on with you?
Speaker 5: So?
Speaker 3: Well, Well, it's funny because I was hoping you would
Speaker 3: kind of go live tonight because I'm just looking for
Speaker 3: some advice about potentially moving abroad to Europe. I'm currently
Speaker 3: living in the US and I have this opportunity to
Speaker 3: move to France for a year, and I'm a little
Speaker 3: bit hesitant. So this is what I'm calling about.
Speaker 1: Okay, what's making you hesitant?
Speaker 3: The thing that's making me hesitant is that I'm worried
Speaker 3: about what I'm gonna do once I get to France.
Speaker 3: Right now, i'm going over there. Potentially I need to
Speaker 3: pay for my university, but once I pay for this semester,
Speaker 3: I'll go out there and study French for about a year.
Speaker 3: But after that, I'm not really sure what's going to happen.
Speaker 3: And just to give a little bit more context, my
Speaker 3: boyfriend currently lives in France. So a big part of
Speaker 3: the reason why I would be moving out there is
Speaker 3: because I want to be with him too, and at
Speaker 3: the same time, I just kind of want to do
Speaker 3: something adventurous for myself. But there's just a little bit
Speaker 3: of hesitation because it's such a big move and I
Speaker 3: would have to sell everything back home and it's just stuff.
Speaker 3: But I think it would be worth it. I don't know,
Speaker 3: it's a big thing. So I honestly didn't think you
Speaker 3: would answer. So I don't know really what else to say.
Speaker 1: How old are you?
Speaker 3: I'm twenty five.
Speaker 1: You have you ever been outside of the country.
Speaker 3: Yeah. I went to France last year for about a month,
Speaker 3: and I loved it. It was my first time to Europe,
Speaker 3: and going to France for the first time was it
Speaker 3: was surreal. I got to do a lot of the
Speaker 3: things that I never really thought I would ever do,
Speaker 3: like going to the Catacombs was amazing, and Saints Eiffel
Speaker 3: Tower was incredible, and going to Normandy and going to
Speaker 3: like the D Day Museum and everything was really fascinating
Speaker 3: because I really like history. So I got to go
Speaker 3: to France for about about a month, but that's the
Speaker 3: longest that I've been there.
Speaker 1: And where do you live currently?
Speaker 3: I live in Arkansas currently, okay?
Speaker 1: And do you have like a can like what's going
Speaker 1: on in Arkansas? Do you have a lot of like
Speaker 1: friends and family there or a job there? Like do
Speaker 1: you have like significant reasons why you want to stay
Speaker 1: in Arkansas?
Speaker 3: Yeah, those reasons would be what you just listed, my
Speaker 3: friends and my family and my job here. I'm really
Speaker 3: close with my family, like my sisters and my brothers,
Speaker 3: and I've kind of got family all over the place,
Speaker 3: and then I have a pretty good I have a
Speaker 3: pretty good job back home, so there there would be
Speaker 3: a lot kind of keeping me here. You know, my
Speaker 3: family knows that I'm thinking about making this move and
Speaker 3: they all really would hate to see me go. But
Speaker 3: at the same time, they're you know, a little bit
Speaker 3: supportive but questionable of the ideas because it's kind of
Speaker 3: spur of the not spur of the moment, but it's
Speaker 3: kind of it's a huge decision, so they're just kind
Speaker 3: of like telling me to really think about what I'm
Speaker 3: doing here. So to answer your question.
Speaker 1: I've got do you do you have a Do you
Speaker 1: have a lease right now in Arkansas? Are you living
Speaker 1: with your parents?
Speaker 5: No?
Speaker 3: I have an apartment and I'm month to month right now.
Speaker 1: Oh that's okay.
Speaker 3: Yeah, And what and.
Speaker 1: What you would be going there for like a year
Speaker 1: to live in France or this is like a I
Speaker 1: am moving to France.
Speaker 3: Uh, it's a year for now for my student visa,
Speaker 3: and then I wanted to try it out for a
Speaker 3: year and then after that, uh, if like once I
Speaker 3: really know what I'm getting myself into seeing how I
Speaker 3: like it, then probably would end up moving there. But
Speaker 3: I just I guess the only thing I'm worried about
Speaker 3: is making sure I become somebody there as in having
Speaker 3: a career. Maybe that's my biggest story.
Speaker 1: I'm team go there for a year. Yeah, because look,
Speaker 1: this isn't like nothing. Nothing you've said to me so
Speaker 1: far has been like particularly stupid. I mean, yeah, why
Speaker 1: not just go there for a year and have a
Speaker 1: little adventure, right, and then come back and I mean,
Speaker 1: you know, and then if you want to come back,
Speaker 1: you can come back, but you'll never forget the year
Speaker 1: that you spent in France. I try to do things
Speaker 1: where it's like, okay, I'll never forget doing that, you know.
Speaker 1: So I mean I think going for a year is
Speaker 1: not a bad move.
Speaker 3: Okay. I like your advice about doing things that I
Speaker 3: would never forget, because you know, I was leaning on
Speaker 3: the side of like I knew I'm going to do this.
Speaker 3: I just don't know what I'm waiting on. I think
Speaker 3: the thought of it being such a big move is
Speaker 3: kind of like scaring.
Speaker 1: Me and sometimes things, but it's what I don't understand
Speaker 1: is why is this such a big move because I mean, look,
Speaker 1: you're gonna you leave your apartment and sell a bunch
Speaker 1: of shit whatever. I don't know, is there a housing
Speaker 1: crisis in Arkansas where you can't just come back after
Speaker 1: a year and get another apartment near your family? Like
Speaker 1: what exactly makes this such a big decision?
Speaker 3: I don't know. Maybe I'm just thinking to I think,
Speaker 3: maybe I'm thinking too deeply into it, like the what
Speaker 3: ifs of God forbid, I don't end up liking it there,
Speaker 3: Like Okay, I need a plan b if I come
Speaker 3: back and like what am I going to come back to?
Speaker 3: Like do I sell my car or do I make
Speaker 3: sure I have a car to come back to you?
Speaker 3: Or you know, like the stuff that I've had over
Speaker 3: the years. It's just stuff, but like what do I sell?
Speaker 3: What do I keep? And the preparation of going over there.
Speaker 3: It kind of seems like, look.
Speaker 1: Look here's the thing. All these these these are all
Speaker 1: like little things, you know, like do you sell your car?
Speaker 1: Do you like what? It's all kind of figure outable stuff,
Speaker 1: I think. So, I mean, like, man, if I were you,
Speaker 1: it's like if do you if you want adventure, then
Speaker 1: go out and have yourself an adventure. Now's the time,
Speaker 1: Now's the better time to do it right, because you're
Speaker 1: not married, you don't have kids, you don't have a mortgage,
Speaker 1: you don't have like anything crazy crazy crazy tying you
Speaker 1: down anywhere. So I you know, go for a year,
Speaker 1: go go for a couple of months, and if you
Speaker 1: hate it, then go back home and live with your
Speaker 1: parents in Arkansas while you find a new place like this.
Speaker 1: It's a very reversible decision. Should you decide that you
Speaker 1: don't like it anymore, but you should. I think it's
Speaker 1: worth a shot, you know. That's how I feel, especially
Speaker 1: if forever.
Speaker 3: Yeah, well, I'm not from here. I moved here in
Speaker 3: my teenage years, so I'm not even from Arkansas. But
Speaker 3: I was definitely leaning towards like you know what might
Speaker 3: as well, like what's the worst, It's only a year,
Speaker 3: Like what an incredible opportunity. And honestly, I knew I
Speaker 3: wanted to do it, and I do want to do it,
Speaker 3: and I just wanted to call to you.
Speaker 1: Know, validate a high experience.
Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, maybe maybe I was just looking for a
Speaker 3: little bit of validation because I've been getting a lot
Speaker 3: of people like questioning my decisions and you know, I'm
Speaker 3: I'm feel sure of myself, but it's nice to have
Speaker 3: other people like be like, yeah, go for it, and
Speaker 3: so thank you gut Go. I I appreciate your advice,
Speaker 3: and you know, the making things in wanting to make
Speaker 3: a memory out of that's something that I'll remember.
Speaker 1: Uh, Donnie, is there anything else you want to say
Speaker 1: to the people of the computer before we go?
Speaker 3: Yes, I want to say, don't hesitate and don't let
Speaker 3: the what if stop you from doing something adventurous.
Speaker 1: Thank you for calling, Donny.
Speaker 3: Thank you. Have a good night. Gecko.
Speaker 1: Hey, what's your name?
Speaker 5: Oh?
Speaker 8: Good, So Hayden the GK Man.
Speaker 1: Yes, this is the GAK Man. How are you?
Speaker 2: Hayden?
Speaker 5: Has life awesome?
Speaker 8: Great to hear. Yeah, it's been It's been all right
Speaker 8: the last couple of months. Uh, just has had a
Speaker 8: colnhosk be done today and just sitting here watching the
Speaker 8: Self Park.
Speaker 1: Movie which one Bigger, Longer und cut? Yeah, sir, Oh
Speaker 1: that one's a classic. I love that movie. I used
Speaker 1: to watch it with fucking director's commentary when they re
Speaker 1: released it on Blu ray.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 8: I'm just watching the DVD. But yeah, just uh just
Speaker 8: finished a thirty six hours fast because and I'm celebrating tonight.
Speaker 1: Oooh okay, what are we getting into after this thirty
Speaker 1: six hour fast?
Speaker 4: What are we? Uh?
Speaker 1: What are we gonna destroy our body with? Please?
Speaker 5: Oh?
Speaker 8: I got a couple of pizzas going and uh, I
Speaker 8: don't want to go too crazy because it started the
Speaker 8: gym a couple weeks ago. You know, I don't want
Speaker 8: to get too crazy.
Speaker 5: But yeah, that's awesome living life.
Speaker 8: Miss food, last day and a half miss food.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Fasting is good though, because I when you get into
Speaker 1: a routine where you're just like eating like a piece
Speaker 1: of shit every fucking day, you know you gotta sometimes
Speaker 1: you gotta remind yourself. You gotta reset your brain to
Speaker 1: be like, oh, actually, food is meant to be enjoyed
Speaker 1: despairingly and not. Uh you're not supposed to eat fucking
Speaker 1: five hundred grams of sugar every day or anything like that.
Speaker 1: You gotta reset your brain and then you enjoy food more.
Speaker 1: It's good. It's a good thing to fast. I'm doing
Speaker 1: a little fast now. That's how I was losing weight
Speaker 1: as I was doing like a twice a week, six
Speaker 1: hundred calorie only fast and it was working pretty well,
Speaker 1: and then I got fucking crazy and I stopped doing it.
Speaker 1: But now we're back on the horn. So you and
Speaker 1: me were just a couple of fucking.
Speaker 5: Uh yeah, for sure.
Speaker 1: We're just a couple of boys.
Speaker 2: On our.
Speaker 1: On our on our skinny game.
Speaker 8: Uh that's right. I'm trying, Hayden.
Speaker 1: What uh what can I do for you today? What'd
Speaker 1: you want to talk about?
Speaker 5: All right? Just?
Speaker 8: Uh, first time calling in? Just uh? Yeah, I recently
Speaker 8: moved out of my parents' house and uh, honestly it's
Speaker 8: been fabulous.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 1: How long were you in there for?
Speaker 5: Oh?
Speaker 8: I did two months. Uh next week I'll be here.
Speaker 1: Okay, So uh in two months you will be.
Speaker 8: Oh say no, sorry, I've been with a parent. I'm
Speaker 8: twenty four, so I've been with my parents my whole
Speaker 8: life and I just got out for two months.
Speaker 1: Very nice, very nice? Okay, And what what was it
Speaker 1: that made you finally be like I'm getting out of there.
Speaker 7: I don't know.
Speaker 8: I love my family, but I just needed to get
Speaker 8: away from.
Speaker 1: Them totally totally. And what are you buy yourself? Are
Speaker 1: you with roommates?
Speaker 8: Yeah, I'm just by myself at the moment. I got
Speaker 8: a it's it's like my grandparents' house, but they're not
Speaker 8: doing very well, so like I'm kind of like taking
Speaker 8: over the payments for the time being until they didn't
Speaker 8: want to decide what they want to do. So kind
Speaker 8: of like sucks, but you know, still happy with the situation.
Speaker 1: Are you in your grandparents' house right now?
Speaker 5: Yes?
Speaker 1: Are your grandparents there?
Speaker 8: I know they are. One's my mom's taking care of
Speaker 8: my grandma and my grandpapa is he has a dementia,
Speaker 8: so he's at the like a retirement home in the
Speaker 8: take care of them.
Speaker 1: Okay, so you can still you know, you still have
Speaker 1: your own space.
Speaker 8: Oh yeah, which is it sucks, you know, like not
Speaker 8: the best circumstances for this, but you know, take what
Speaker 8: I can get if however long it lasts.
Speaker 1: You know whatever, nice have you have you done? An
Speaker 1: what like, what if now that you're now that you're
Speaker 1: on your own, you're having girls over, you're having parties?
Speaker 1: What are you doing?
Speaker 5: Yeah?
Speaker 8: Funny thing about that. The second day I move in,
Speaker 8: I got broken up with Oh no, it kind of
Speaker 8: been a weird couple of months, really weird couple of months.
Speaker 1: What happens?
Speaker 8: I don't know, just uh, I don't think we just
Speaker 8: we've been dating for six and a half years, so
Speaker 8: I think I don't know, it was just kind of
Speaker 8: time and like it was a high school relationship, so
Speaker 8: it's you always still miss there a lot, but you know,
Speaker 8: I think it was for the best, you know, It's
Speaker 8: just kind of bad timing, unfortunately, Like I was at
Speaker 8: excited about moving and the second day I get here, Hey,
Speaker 8: we need to talk. So yeah, it's unfortunate.
Speaker 1: Are you you're calling me from Canada?
Speaker 8: It seems yes, sir?
Speaker 1: What part of Canada.
Speaker 8: Windsor, Ontario, like a right across from Detroit?
Speaker 1: And what's going on in uh oh yeah, yeah, yeah, sure,
Speaker 1: I think I've I've been like near the border of
Speaker 1: Windsor what's going on in Windsor? It's is it?
Speaker 2: Is it?
Speaker 1: Is it a shithole? Or is it fun?
Speaker 8: That's sorry? I mean a lot of manufacturing jobs and
Speaker 8: what was that?
Speaker 5: Hellope?
Speaker 1: Hey, what's up?
Speaker 8: Oh sorry, my alarm went off with my pizza?
Speaker 5: Sorry, but that you there?
Speaker 8: Yeah, sorry, my alarm just went off from a pizza
Speaker 8: over that.
Speaker 1: You have a pizza alarm? Yeah, like like no.
Speaker 8: It's yeah, cook in the oven?
Speaker 1: Like okay, okay, I thought it was. I thought it
Speaker 1: was like a birth control pill alarm, where it just
Speaker 1: tells you that.
Speaker 5: Pizza, yeah, pizza, yeah, yeah, one just good.
Speaker 8: I don't we're getting like a lot of people around
Speaker 8: here are getting a little scared of all these pariffs
Speaker 8: news and it's kind of scaring a lot of us.
Speaker 8: But you know, we're getting through it all, okay, because
Speaker 8: we do a lot of the car part manufacturing and
Speaker 8: not a lot of people around here agon kind of
Speaker 8: get kind of scared. But yeah, we're keeping through, keeping through.
Speaker 1: Yeah, what's the I know that Trump is doing a
Speaker 1: bunch of crazy stuff. How's how's it being received over
Speaker 1: in Canada.
Speaker 8: At Honestly, a lot of the people who were conservatives
Speaker 8: like a couple of years ago are not conservative now.
Speaker 8: So that that's even with the hardcore ones, that's kind
Speaker 8: of crazy to me, Like all the guys that were
Speaker 8: super all into that stuff not into it anymore.
Speaker 1: Interesting. It's funny because I guess it's like the past. However,
Speaker 1: many years I was always like, what's it gonna fucking
Speaker 1: like take? You know, I guess I guess what it
Speaker 1: took was a giant stock market crash.
Speaker 8: Yeah, Well, it's still scary over here too, I'm hearing
Speaker 8: more and more so because honestly, we don't really hear
Speaker 8: a lot of American news at least like we're I know,
Speaker 8: we're like right across the border, but I don't hear
Speaker 8: a lot of the America can news. So I haven't
Speaker 8: really heard much about what's going on over there either.
Speaker 1: M h m hmm. All right, So you're twenty four,
Speaker 1: you're out on your own, and what do you do?
Speaker 1: Do you work in manufacturing?
Speaker 2: Yes?
Speaker 8: I do?
Speaker 1: Okay, how how's how are things at the plant? Do
Speaker 1: you go to a plant? Do you live like Homer?
Speaker 8: Seeah, it's kind like a small like small yeah, kind
Speaker 8: kind of like a small shop type of thing. But yeah,
Speaker 8: they're keep it is busy for the time being. But
Speaker 8: you know, like as the weeks go by, like more
Speaker 8: and more like our jobs are getting like canceled because
Speaker 8: they don't want to like yeah, I don't know, I
Speaker 8: don't know all the details of it, but you have
Speaker 8: more and more jobs are getting canceled. It's getting scarier
Speaker 8: and scarier, but you know they're keeping us on. I
Speaker 8: don't care whatever. M yeah, I just despite that. I
Speaker 8: just trying to sorry, go ahead, No, god, no again.
Speaker 5: None.
Speaker 8: No, I was just gonna say, yeah, just trying to
Speaker 8: stay positive with everything. It's like it's you know, it's
Speaker 8: let's been good despite everything, and you know, I still
Speaker 8: miss my ex, but you know, getting.
Speaker 2: Through it all right.
Speaker 1: Have you been going on any dates? Are you on
Speaker 1: Canadian hinge?
Speaker 2: No?
Speaker 8: It's just not ready for that yet. It's been I
Speaker 8: think two months next week. I don't just not really
Speaker 8: feeling that yet. Just still getting over everything and starting
Speaker 8: to go to therapy and starting to do more things
Speaker 8: that you know, make me feel good about myself and
Speaker 8: trying to be a better person.
Speaker 2: Do you.
Speaker 1: Give a lot of friends in windsor do you have
Speaker 1: like a community and whatnot.
Speaker 8: I have a couple of friends, but you know it's
Speaker 8: I lost a couple over high school. Like but yeah,
Speaker 8: I got two or three Semichels friends. I don't think
Speaker 8: I have any like close friends at the moment.
Speaker 4: But what's your.
Speaker 1: What's your dream in life?
Speaker 8: I don't know, just try and shrug through and be
Speaker 8: able to afford some good stuff later in life.
Speaker 1: Yeah, what kind of good stuff?
Speaker 8: I don't I would want to go in some trips
Speaker 8: long term, Like I know, I just heard someone was
Speaker 8: talking about going to France and I would like to
Speaker 8: check out France someday.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, France is uh well, you guys, don't you
Speaker 1: live near You could go to Mini France. You could
Speaker 1: go to Montreal.
Speaker 8: Oh yeah that's true. Yeah that's still about what eight
Speaker 8: nine hours away. Yeah, I thought about it, just taking
Speaker 8: a little trip. And yes, I don't know, I've just
Speaker 8: kind of been I'm happy, but you know, still down
Speaker 8: about the whole situation. But yeah, and maybe next during
Speaker 8: the summer, I was thinking about just trying to do
Speaker 8: something fun for myself, go alone somewhere for a couple
Speaker 8: of days and try and enjoy some life.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I like that, enjoy some life. I mean, Canada has
Speaker 1: a lot of places where you can go into the
Speaker 1: woods and never come back out or be you know,
Speaker 1: fight a bear, fight a bear. Yeah you been out.
Speaker 1: Have you spent a lot of time in that? In
Speaker 1: that Canadian wilderness?
Speaker 8: I'm gonna have to BC a couple of times. It's
Speaker 8: beautiful there.
Speaker 5: I love it up there.
Speaker 4: Mhm mhmm.
Speaker 1: Well let's see here. What's your name again, Hayden, Hayden, Hayden.
Speaker 1: Before we go, is there anything that I can do
Speaker 1: for you to make this phone call experience better on
Speaker 1: your end.
Speaker 8: No, I'm just loving your show. I'm watching it since
Speaker 8: the was it the high Mind episode you guys did
Speaker 8: with the Hive Mind guys a couple of years ago.
Speaker 4: Cool.
Speaker 1: I'm glad you liked that, because if you it's funny,
Speaker 1: if you go on Reddit, or if you go on
Speaker 1: on that video, it is consistently ranked as the worst
Speaker 1: hive Mind episode of all time.
Speaker 8: Really, yeah, I thought I thought you about an interesting
Speaker 8: dynamic to them.
Speaker 1: I mean, look, I was rewatching it and I was like,
Speaker 1: I was rewatching it and I was like, I don't
Speaker 1: get what people are so mad about. I watched one
Speaker 1: part and I was like, all right, maybe a couple
Speaker 1: of parts I was being kind of a dick, It's true,
Speaker 1: But the rest of it I was fine.
Speaker 8: But anyway, no, I am sorry, sorry, what part do
Speaker 8: you think you're going to dick?
Speaker 2: Abough?
Speaker 8: I thought I thought it was entertainment.
Speaker 1: I was, thank you, thank you, thank you. As look
Speaker 1: as long as as long as at least one person
Speaker 1: found that video mildly entertaining, then that's all I care about.
Speaker 1: But well, you know, Hayden, thank you very much, for
Speaker 1: calling man. Is there anything else you want to say
Speaker 1: to the people of the computer before we go.
Speaker 8: I'm just trying to stay positive and any issues you
Speaker 8: got go to therapy, all.
Speaker 1: Right, take care of Hayden. I gotta get up to
Speaker 1: Canada sometime. Hello everybody, this is Lyle uh Gecko guy.
Speaker 1: I am here at the end of this episode because
Speaker 1: I wanted to introduce a little preview of a thing. Okay, basically,
Speaker 1: about a year ago, I went on a trip to
Speaker 1: Thailand and I did get interviews on the street with
Speaker 1: people there. I made a friend on Instagram named Ice,
Speaker 1: and he helped me translate interviews with Thai folks because
Speaker 1: I do not speak Thai. And I don't know why
Speaker 1: I went on this trip like a year ago, but
Speaker 1: I sat on the footage for a full year. I
Speaker 1: don't know why, but I'm releasing the footage today and
Speaker 1: if you go on my YouTube channel YouTube dot com
Speaker 1: slash Lyle Forever, you can see the irl interviews that
Speaker 1: I did on the streets of Thailand. And I decided
Speaker 1: I'm gonna end this episode with a little preview interview
Speaker 1: that I did with this guy who was working at
Speaker 1: a barbecue restaurant nearby wherever we were filming, and he
Speaker 1: came over and he did an interview with us. Now,
Speaker 1: this little preview, a lot of it is in Taie,
Speaker 1: which I understand for a podcast is maybe not optimal,
Speaker 1: but it's in Tie, but I have somebody who translates it,
Speaker 1: and so whatever. I think it's kind of cool. I
Speaker 1: think it's kind of cool. You'll understand it. You will
Speaker 1: be able to understand this interview as much as I
Speaker 1: was able to understand this interview while I was doing it,
Speaker 1: which I think is cool. I think it's cool to
Speaker 1: I don't know, get to talk to people who speak
Speaker 1: languages that I do not speak. But if you want
Speaker 1: to go listen to the full thing, I actually have
Speaker 1: subtitles on it to translate the Tie to the English,
Speaker 1: so that you're not just listening back to the translations
Speaker 1: that my friend Ice does. But yeah, I'll play this
Speaker 1: little snippet, and if you like it and you want
Speaker 1: to watch the whole thing with the subtitles and everything,
Speaker 1: you can go to YouTube dot com slash lyle forever,
Speaker 1: or find a link in the episode description. All right,
Speaker 1: let's hear the interview. What's your name cheer leap.
Speaker 4: We we have we we yes.
Speaker 1: We nice to meet you.
Speaker 4: We meet you hub.
Speaker 1: What are you doing out on the town today?
Speaker 4: He's working right now.
Speaker 1: Okay, how do you like your job?
Speaker 4: Sho, he'd me. But he's like it. He's like it's
Speaker 4: easy going, is just going on easy. It's just come
Speaker 4: easy to him.
Speaker 1: And uh, you you work at a where where do
Speaker 1: you work?
Speaker 4: He worked here? I have BBQ here.
Speaker 1: Okay, so you work at this Barbieview restaurant? How are
Speaker 1: the customers here? They are they nice and polity? Do
Speaker 1: you ever run into people who are like kind of rude?
Speaker 4: Look? Look how t Yeah?
Speaker 1: You know.
Speaker 6: Remember guy.
Speaker 4: He ran in him into some problems some costumer. But
Speaker 4: he said, like they're just being picky and shoot what
Speaker 4: they want and not doesn't go easy with what they have.
Speaker 1: Okay, So people who are like picky eaters and like
Speaker 1: just like making things.
Speaker 4: Difficult, little man. Look, god, I'm high Lambard.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 4: Many sometime consumer come to the barbecue, Yes, and they
Speaker 4: want like a chicken sauce, some type certain type of
Speaker 4: chicken thought at a Bobby Cue restaurant? Yeah, some stuff
Speaker 4: like that.
Speaker 1: And are you like when you run into conflict when
Speaker 1: people are like, you know, kind of tight or demanding.
Speaker 1: Are you are you good at dealing with that? Are
Speaker 1: you are you good at kind of keeping your cool
Speaker 1: or do you are you able to keep cool under
Speaker 1: the pressure?
Speaker 4: Well a banha, Well I tell you, p lucic WebP
Speaker 4: li He said, it's cool. I'm used to it.
Speaker 1: Okay, cool man? Cool?
Speaker 5: What do you do?
Speaker 1: What do you like to do outside of work?
Speaker 4: But he like to.
Speaker 6: Don't he?
Speaker 4: Okay, he's just like just towering around, Like he's just
Speaker 4: like to towel around in Bangkok and stuff when he
Speaker 4: is not working.
Speaker 1: Okay, he just likes to travel around. Yes, uh do
Speaker 1: you do? You have a lot of friends and stuff?
Speaker 4: Me?
Speaker 1: Yeah, what do you what do you like to go
Speaker 1: out and do with your friends?
Speaker 4: Top half of man? Well like.
Speaker 6: Them hanging.
Speaker 4: You just go to some mall and maybe takes with
Speaker 4: them something like that?
Speaker 1: Nice?
Speaker 4: Nice?
Speaker 1: What's what's your dream in life? What do you what
Speaker 1: do you want at a life? Ultimately? What do you
Speaker 1: what do you hope to to do with with your
Speaker 1: time alive on the earth?
Speaker 4: Nice? Shot com here we have teabap like fun d
Speaker 4: o t Actually he literally liked to drive a car
Speaker 4: like a wan. He really love a wan.
Speaker 1: A wan like.
Speaker 4: A long can. What do you call it?
Speaker 1: Long car? A van?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 1: When do you want to drive a van? A van?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 6: From your he.
Speaker 4: He liked to be in a car. He just like
Speaker 4: to drive or live in the high event.
Speaker 1: Oh, you want to live in you want to do
Speaker 1: the van life?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 5: We do.
Speaker 4: Yeah, he wants to do that.
Speaker 2: Us.
Speaker 1: You want to live in a van and drive all
Speaker 1: right like that?
Speaker 2: Yea?
Speaker 1: And drive all the way around? Do you want do
Speaker 1: you want to like travel in it, like drive all
Speaker 1: around the country and ship yeah?
Speaker 4: Yeah, putty yeah, cap board traveling and working. I think
Speaker 4: he want to do everything.
Speaker 1: Nice man? Yes, how's how's your dating life going?
Speaker 4: She eat? He's singer right now?
Speaker 1: Nice?
Speaker 4: Ladies?
Speaker 1: Are you are you? Are you going out on on dates?
Speaker 4: Are you trying to find a wife of some kind?
Speaker 4: He says, he's talking to a girl and he been
Speaker 4: talking for like two years, but he haven't met her yet.
Speaker 1: Well, he hasn't met her yet. No, No, where did you?
Speaker 1: Where did you meet her online?
Speaker 4: Martin? Or live about online? Online? She is at home
Speaker 4: right now?
Speaker 1: Okay, so you so he met her on the internet,
Speaker 1: but they haven't met in real life yet? Yes, how
Speaker 1: come you guys haven't met in real life yet? She
Speaker 1: might not live here?
Speaker 4: Tell my her? How about your guy? You back? She
Speaker 4: lives like Lily far away?
Speaker 1: Okay? Do you hope to meet her one day?
Speaker 4: Yeah? Someone help me up? And he wants to meet her,
Speaker 4: but he doesn't know if she wants to meet him.
Speaker 1: Are you have you ever? Are you afraid? Do you
Speaker 1: know the catfishes?
Speaker 4: There's no better highlight about. Don't go on. He is
Speaker 4: he's not afraid of being He's.
Speaker 1: Not afraid of being catfish. That's cool, that's cool. Hm hmm, well,
Speaker 1: uh do you have any questions?
Speaker 4: Mm hmmm.
Speaker 5: Uh yeah, but.
Speaker 1: He said in English?
Speaker 3: Uh?
Speaker 4: In your free time? What do you You already asked that, right? Yeah,
Speaker 4: no question, man, Let me think, let me think. Oh crap,
Speaker 4: I thought there was some I thought there was a
Speaker 4: cap trying to.
Speaker 5: Let me.
Speaker 1: Let me say, oh uh, what's what's your favorite part
Speaker 1: of working at this barbecue restaurant?
Speaker 4: Chops? He stood, So.
Speaker 1: Serve the food you like, to serve the food.
Speaker 2: You want?
Speaker 4: High, it's comfortable. He could work alone, doesn't have to
Speaker 4: mess with anybody.
Speaker 1: Okay, I'll ask all right, let me ask you this,
Speaker 1: just back on the on the other subject. Do you
Speaker 1: do you believe in true love?
Speaker 4: Charley and would die die here he's somewhat believe in it.
Speaker 1: Okay, here you Okay, I believe I believe in it too,
Speaker 1: and I believe you will find true love.
Speaker 4: Handy, I'm meeting.
Speaker 6: A recording.
Speaker 4: Okay, he's just like to hang around. He doesn't seek
Speaker 4: any girls or anything like that. He's just like leave
Speaker 4: there by day, just hang around.
Speaker 1: Okay. So you're you're you're chilling. You're like a zen dude.
Speaker 4: But what can I show you? But you show me
Speaker 4: and me and.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah like that that's cool. How do I I
Speaker 1: final final question the people watching this who want to
Speaker 1: adapt a chill zen mindset such as the one that
Speaker 1: you have. What would you what would you say to them?
Speaker 1: What would your advice be to the people?
Speaker 4: P Yeah you.
Speaker 6: Me ma, and I'm like you, I got you.
Speaker 4: Let he said that. Uh, you guys shouldn't give a fuck,
Speaker 4: like just do whatever you want and whatever people do
Speaker 4: to you, just let it go.
Speaker 9: Like just be she yeah, hello talking.
Speaker 4: Whatever people do to you, just let it go.
Speaker 1: Just be nice man. Nice?
Speaker 6: What is uh?
Speaker 1: What what is what's what's the tie word for? To
Speaker 1: not give a fuck?
Speaker 5: How?
Speaker 4: How did he say that?
Speaker 2: Hi?
Speaker 4: Pizza, little harm huming and teach about my th dial
Speaker 4: t and pizza. But hell, look me, I have become
Speaker 4: the Yeah if it's not really like the true meaning
Speaker 4: of it. But the w he said was like northy
Speaker 4: entire okay something.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 4: Sometime people just do bad thing to him and he
Speaker 4: just like let it go. That's what you do, nice man?
Speaker 1: Well, is there anything else you I say to the
Speaker 1: people the computer before we get about mahattan.
Speaker 9: About one idea? Die?
Speaker 4: Whatever people do to you, don't give a funk. If
Speaker 4: you do, then it's my get into the homeless. Then
Speaker 4: just don't do it.
Speaker 1: What's what's your name? One more time? B V, nice
Speaker 1: to meet you. Thank you very much for taking time
Speaker 1: out of work to talk to us. Man. We appreciate it.
Speaker 4: Uh lile forever a man that you want your sure
Speaker 4: for sure? YouTube?
Speaker 1: Do you watch a lot of Do you watch a
Speaker 1: lot of YouTube?
Speaker 6: Show?
Speaker 4: Do YouTube? YouTube? And TikTok?
Speaker 1: Who do you watch on YouTube?
Speaker 4: Shove Hi have YouTube?
Speaker 6: Book SBD young the keep the Low.
Speaker 4: You just like to watch comedic stuff and sometime YouTuber.
Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, maybe I'll maybe I'll start translating my videos
Speaker 1: into tie so I can reach a new audience.
Speaker 4: By the radio. And I have a me pee wee man.
Speaker 4: Yeah sweet.
Speaker 1: Also thanks man. You know that guy he reminded me
Speaker 1: of something. Actually, people will ask me sometimes like what
Speaker 1: I've learned from like talking to so many people both
Speaker 1: like doing this and on the computer, and I I
Speaker 1: think I realized, like the answer to that is one
Speaker 1: of the things I've learned from talking about people is
Speaker 1: that I really do think that, uh, like a lot
Speaker 1: of life is like a matter of perspective, you know
Speaker 1: what I mean. Like what that guy was saying about
Speaker 1: how he's like, you know, look man, like people people
Speaker 1: are always giving me shit, but it doesn't matter because
Speaker 1: I'm keeping a chill head. I'm happy, I'm chilling out
Speaker 1: like he seemed. He just seemed like he was chilling
Speaker 1: you know, and you can just see it on his face.
Speaker 1: He just was a chill guy, Like he just had
Speaker 1: a good zen perspective. And I think, you know, from
Speaker 1: talking to a bunch of people, like there'll be people
Speaker 1: on the phone who, like, you know, they call in
Speaker 1: to talk about something like terrible but they're just so
Speaker 1: chill about it, you know, or like, And then the
Speaker 1: opposite people who like are like freaking out, freaking out
Speaker 1: about something like inconsequential and it really is like a
Speaker 1: matter of a matter of perspective.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I agree, if like whatever you thinking your head,
Speaker 4: it's oh wait, onna have I'm influend on you for sure.
Speaker 1: Yeah, hey it's me again.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 1: If you liked that, If you enjoyed that and you
Speaker 1: want to watch the full video again, it'll have subtitles
Speaker 1: for the tie. You can go to YouTube dot com
Speaker 1: slash lyle forever or find the link to this video
Speaker 1: in the episode description. Okay, thank you for listening to
Speaker 1: my podcast. I will be back again soon and get
Speaker 1: bless you for ten thousand years.
Speaker 2: It goes on the line taking your phone calls every night.
Speaker 2: Everythink goes down his eye.
Speaker 4: Who's teaching you to how over your life? But he's
Speaker 4: not really an expert.