WEBVTT - Chelsea Handler on Drugs 0:00:00.320 --> 0:00:07.720 Hi, I'm Ethan Edelman, and this is Psychoactive, a production 0:00:07.760 --> 0:00:11.600 of I Heart Radio and Protozoa Pictures. Psychoactive is the 0:00:11.640 --> 0:00:15.000 show where we talk about all things drugs. But any 0:00:15.120 --> 0:00:18.760 views expressed here do not represent those of I Heart Media, 0:00:18.880 --> 0:00:23.480 Protozoa Pictures, or their executives and employees. Indeed, Heed, as 0:00:23.520 --> 0:00:26.400 an inveterate contrarian, I can tell you they may not 0:00:26.560 --> 0:00:30.720 even represent my own and nothing contained in this show 0:00:30.840 --> 0:00:33.680 should be used his medical advice or encouragement to use 0:00:33.760 --> 0:00:45.720 any type of drugs. Hello Psychoactive listeners. So today my 0:00:45.840 --> 0:00:49.879 guest is somebody who's really famous. UM, her name's Chelsea 0:00:50.000 --> 0:00:54.440 Handler and she's got her own podcast. You're Chelsea and 0:00:54.480 --> 0:00:57.920 had me on a little while ago and very graciously 0:00:57.960 --> 0:01:02.080 accepted invitation to join me on Coactive. So so Chelsea, 0:01:02.160 --> 0:01:05.560 thanks so much for doing this. Oh thank you, Evan, 0:01:05.680 --> 0:01:10.200 no problem, my pleasure. You know, I am pretty removed 0:01:10.280 --> 0:01:12.399 from like what's going on in pop culture in all 0:01:12.480 --> 0:01:14.600 sorts of ways. So I'll tell you the truth. And 0:01:14.640 --> 0:01:17.560 also for listeners that when you know our folks have 0:01:17.680 --> 0:01:19.679 arranged for me to be on your podcast. I I 0:01:19.840 --> 0:01:22.440 heard your name, but I didn't really have a clear 0:01:22.480 --> 0:01:23.920 idea of who you were, and so I did a 0:01:23.920 --> 0:01:25.640 little research, so I know why I was being on 0:01:25.720 --> 0:01:28.960 your podcast. But I have to say, you know, doing 0:01:29.000 --> 0:01:33.360 this deep dive and preparing for this thing, you're fucking amazing. 0:01:33.400 --> 0:01:35.000 I mean, you know I'm looking at you. You're a 0:01:35.040 --> 0:01:38.280 world famous comedian. This is for the audience of my audience, 0:01:38.280 --> 0:01:41.640 who doesn't know you are. She is a actress. She 0:01:41.920 --> 0:01:46.240 is a podcast host. She is a talk show host. 0:01:46.280 --> 0:01:48.560 In fact, I think she was only the second woman 0:01:48.640 --> 0:01:50.880 ever after Joan Rivers, to e her own late night 0:01:50.960 --> 0:01:55.680 talk show. She's been doing documentaries on increasingly serious subjects 0:01:55.680 --> 0:01:57.880 while still interweaving holes. It's a humor in it. She's 0:01:57.880 --> 0:02:01.240 a political activist, she's a social just as activist. She's 0:02:01.280 --> 0:02:04.480 currently at the end of two on tour with a 0:02:04.520 --> 0:02:07.520 comedy show called Vaccinated and Horny. So I mean say, 0:02:07.560 --> 0:02:10.040 I don't know how you do it all, um, but 0:02:10.639 --> 0:02:14.880 you're amazing. Well, thank you, what a nice introduction. I 0:02:15.000 --> 0:02:17.760 love it. So I take it that your success is 0:02:17.800 --> 0:02:21.760 all about your drug use, Is that right? Yes? Yes, 0:02:22.120 --> 0:02:26.679 one leads very nicely into the other. Uh yeah, I 0:02:27.120 --> 0:02:30.880 mean I have a very storied history with my affinity 0:02:30.919 --> 0:02:34.600 for drugs and the legalization of all sorts of things, 0:02:34.800 --> 0:02:38.120 And yes, I like to share that on TV and off. No, 0:02:38.240 --> 0:02:40.160 I mean, I guess part of your whole stick right 0:02:40.240 --> 0:02:43.919 is that you're very out there about almost everything right. 0:02:44.200 --> 0:02:46.000 And one of the things I saw was that one 0:02:46.040 --> 0:02:49.320 of the things that first got you into comedy was 0:02:49.520 --> 0:02:51.920 when you after you first got arrested with a d 0:02:52.040 --> 0:02:56.080 u I or something like that. Yes, I was arrested 0:02:56.120 --> 0:02:58.160 when I was twenty one years old for a d 0:02:58.280 --> 0:03:01.400 u I, and I had been using my sister, my 0:03:01.480 --> 0:03:03.720 older sister's fake i D. So when I got pulled 0:03:03.760 --> 0:03:05.560 over for my d u Y, I gave them my 0:03:05.600 --> 0:03:07.720 sister's i D because my practice had been to use 0:03:07.760 --> 0:03:11.200 her i D for anything involving alcohol. And so that 0:03:11.280 --> 0:03:13.519 got me into double trouble because of that, because I 0:03:13.560 --> 0:03:15.920 got a d u I and I was impersonating somebody else, 0:03:16.360 --> 0:03:18.600 and my sister was Mormon at the time and she 0:03:18.720 --> 0:03:22.280 was very very much against drinking and me using her 0:03:22.320 --> 0:03:25.360 i D for such activities. So all in all, I 0:03:25.400 --> 0:03:26.959 got in a lot of trouble and I had to 0:03:27.040 --> 0:03:29.680 go to this d U I class for about eight 0:03:29.720 --> 0:03:33.639 weeks where you meet every Wednesday night and the guy 0:03:33.760 --> 0:03:36.160 running the class basically explains to you how to get 0:03:36.160 --> 0:03:38.000 out of your next du I So I'm not really 0:03:38.000 --> 0:03:40.840 sure why why this is a thing, But anyway, in 0:03:40.920 --> 0:03:43.200 that time I had to make a speech and get 0:03:43.240 --> 0:03:45.200 up and kind of tell my story. And it was 0:03:45.280 --> 0:03:49.800 my first experience publicly speaking, and I was terrified, and uh. 0:03:49.960 --> 0:03:53.760 I kind of waited and waited and avoided being chosen 0:03:53.840 --> 0:03:55.680 and sat in the back of the class every night 0:03:56.320 --> 0:03:58.560 until the very last class where I was called to 0:03:58.640 --> 0:04:01.920 get up and tell my story. And in telling that story, 0:04:02.560 --> 0:04:05.680 it was pretty ridiculous. I mean, I called the cop racist. 0:04:05.760 --> 0:04:08.840 We were both white. I spent seventy two hours in 0:04:08.920 --> 0:04:11.720 Civil Brand College, which for a Jewish girl from an 0:04:11.800 --> 0:04:14.400 upper middle class neighborhood in New Jersey is a hot 0:04:14.440 --> 0:04:18.280 mess nightmare. But because of that class, everyone I told 0:04:18.279 --> 0:04:21.080 my story and everyone was loving it and laughing and 0:04:21.480 --> 0:04:23.720 I could not get off stage. I just thought this 0:04:23.760 --> 0:04:25.359 was the best feeling in the world. And when I 0:04:25.360 --> 0:04:27.800 did get off, Everyone's like, oh, you have to become 0:04:27.839 --> 0:04:30.239 a stand up comedian. And I had never thought about 0:04:30.240 --> 0:04:33.640 that before because I just it just seemed like something 0:04:33.680 --> 0:04:36.640 that I don't know. I just had never considered it. 0:04:36.640 --> 0:04:39.840 It seems scary, and yeah, that's how I decided to 0:04:39.880 --> 0:04:42.599 become a stand up comedian. So thankfully that was my 0:04:42.680 --> 0:04:44.920 first and last d U. I I learned my lesson 0:04:45.680 --> 0:04:47.279 the first time, so I didn't have to learn it 0:04:47.600 --> 0:04:50.640 a second time, and uh yeah, it kind of led 0:04:50.680 --> 0:04:53.160 to my career in stand up. So the irony is 0:04:53.200 --> 0:04:56.360 all over the place. So doing drugs growing up, I mean, 0:04:56.400 --> 0:04:58.440 did you start when you were like twelve or thirteen 0:04:58.839 --> 0:05:02.039 or what was your doing. I was very anti drugs. 0:05:02.080 --> 0:05:04.279 I was very against them until I tried them and 0:05:04.320 --> 0:05:06.600 then I was like, oh, I'd like this. But I 0:05:06.640 --> 0:05:09.080 didn't really start doing drugs until I was like eighteen, 0:05:09.160 --> 0:05:11.960 nineteen years old. And then it was booze or I 0:05:11.960 --> 0:05:16.440 mean acid or yeah, lots of lots of LSD. We 0:05:16.560 --> 0:05:18.960 go to the Limelight in New York City. We take 0:05:19.000 --> 0:05:24.239 a lot of LSD, mushrooms, you know, like psychedelics mostly 0:05:24.680 --> 0:05:28.400 and yeah, some alcohol, but not really alcohol as much 0:05:28.480 --> 0:05:31.080 until later once I was, you know, in my twenties 0:05:31.120 --> 0:05:33.240 and moved to Los Angeles. I moved to Los Angeles 0:05:33.240 --> 0:05:35.800 when I was nineteen, but in high school it was 0:05:35.880 --> 0:05:39.479 much and more about mushrooms and LSD. Yeah, m hmmm. 0:05:39.640 --> 0:05:42.000 And I mean with any of this particularly memorable or 0:05:42.040 --> 0:05:43.800 was it just kind of doing it for yucks at 0:05:43.839 --> 0:05:47.000 the time, you know, we I wasn't using it as 0:05:47.040 --> 0:05:49.680 a therapy, and it wasn't therapeutic. I mean, it was 0:05:49.680 --> 0:05:52.479 probably therapeutic, unbeknownst to me, but it was more of 0:05:52.520 --> 0:05:54.560 a party, you know. It was more to laugh and 0:05:54.640 --> 0:05:58.120 to Dad's and to just kind of be free and like, 0:05:58.240 --> 0:06:01.120 you know, it was a great It was a great feeling. 0:06:01.160 --> 0:06:03.520 I connected with the feeling right away. I don't think 0:06:03.560 --> 0:06:06.880 I've ever had a negative experience. I know some people have, 0:06:07.080 --> 0:06:11.359 but with psilocybin or LSD, it was always the same 0:06:11.440 --> 0:06:14.520 kind of vibe, you know, very I felt very in control. 0:06:14.560 --> 0:06:18.159 I didn't feel out of control, but I felt great. 0:06:18.200 --> 0:06:21.440 I love to laugh, you know, on mushrooms make you laugh, 0:06:21.480 --> 0:06:23.760 and LSD can do the same thing. Sometimes it kind 0:06:23.760 --> 0:06:26.160 of hits me differently. But it just gave me a 0:06:26.200 --> 0:06:30.560 sense of um uninhibitedness that I hadn't felt without it. 0:06:31.080 --> 0:06:34.560 M hm. That you were the youngest of six growing up, 0:06:34.680 --> 0:06:36.120 but I wanted growing up. I mean, were you getting 0:06:36.200 --> 0:06:38.080 high with your siblings as well, or was this all 0:06:38.120 --> 0:06:41.160 the stuff you did separate from that. Uh No, I 0:06:41.200 --> 0:06:44.039 wasn't getting high with them. I definitely started taking mushrooms 0:06:44.040 --> 0:06:47.359 with my brothers around nineteen or twenty because I'm the 0:06:47.400 --> 0:06:49.479 one who had them, so you know, then I was 0:06:49.520 --> 0:06:51.440 able to share with them and they didn't really have 0:06:51.440 --> 0:06:53.960 a choice of the matter. So yeah, I took mushroms 0:06:54.000 --> 0:06:57.679 with my brothers on several occasions, and you know, smoked 0:06:57.720 --> 0:07:01.240 pot with them, but not until I was about nineteen. 0:07:01.800 --> 0:07:04.320 Uh huh. And I take it with your parents, zero 0:07:04.520 --> 0:07:08.120 drug used together. No, my parents weren't. Yeah, they didn't 0:07:08.160 --> 0:07:10.720 do drugs, but my dad and my mom really didn't 0:07:10.720 --> 0:07:13.320 have any judgment on that. They just thought, you know, 0:07:13.680 --> 0:07:16.000 that's part of being a kid. My brothers and sisters 0:07:16.040 --> 0:07:18.520 who were older than be grew up in the seventies, 0:07:18.800 --> 0:07:21.280 so I was born in seventy five, so my parents 0:07:21.280 --> 0:07:24.360 were kind of used to, like, you know, drug exploration. 0:07:24.480 --> 0:07:27.560 They didn't have a big problem with that, even though 0:07:27.640 --> 0:07:30.000 I mean, I really you went to a synagogue, you 0:07:30.040 --> 0:07:34.280 were bought miss as. Your dad Jewish, but your mom 0:07:34.320 --> 0:07:40.120 like was Mormon. Yeah, she came over from Germany, so 0:07:40.240 --> 0:07:43.600 there's a big Mormon contingency over Germany or there was, 0:07:43.960 --> 0:07:47.040 and after the war she came over. I mean she 0:07:47.200 --> 0:07:49.640 was about six or seven when World War two ended 0:07:50.200 --> 0:07:53.280 and her father was served in the German military, so 0:07:53.480 --> 0:07:56.720 he had been taken as a pow uh in the 0:07:56.760 --> 0:08:00.920 first year of the war to Iowa, and so he 0:08:01.080 --> 0:08:03.800 was in Iowa for many years. And then the war 0:08:03.920 --> 0:08:07.520 ended and he returned, and then they lived in Germany 0:08:07.600 --> 0:08:09.880 for about ten more years, and then my mom came 0:08:09.880 --> 0:08:12.320 over to visit New Jersey when she was about nineteen 0:08:12.400 --> 0:08:15.960 years old. I met my father and went back home 0:08:16.000 --> 0:08:18.240 to Germany to tell them she was moving to America. 0:08:18.880 --> 0:08:21.360 And then shortly after my mom and dad got married, 0:08:22.000 --> 0:08:25.160 they got pregnant, or probably before they got married, quite frankly, 0:08:25.240 --> 0:08:28.640 and then my grandparents came over. So my grandparents and 0:08:28.680 --> 0:08:33.240 my mother were all Mormon, and they came over and 0:08:33.280 --> 0:08:35.320 my dad was like, listen, I'm going to raise my 0:08:35.360 --> 0:08:37.679 family Jewish, so you have to get on board with that. 0:08:38.160 --> 0:08:40.880 There's not gonna be any Mormonism in this family. And 0:08:40.920 --> 0:08:43.960 my mom said, sure, no problem. And so I thought 0:08:43.960 --> 0:08:46.240 my mom was Jewish until I was nine years old, 0:08:46.400 --> 0:08:48.720 because she was at temple with us every weekend, and 0:08:48.760 --> 0:08:51.680 she would, you know, she knew all the Hebrew prayers, 0:08:51.720 --> 0:08:55.319 and we celebrated all the Jewish holidays. Um. Yeah. And 0:08:55.360 --> 0:08:58.320 I didn't find out she wasn't Jewish until my brother 0:08:58.400 --> 0:09:00.880 died when I was nine, and we found out she 0:09:00.920 --> 0:09:04.480 couldn't been buried in the same cemetery as my brother 0:09:04.760 --> 0:09:07.000 because she wasn't Jewish and she would have to convert 0:09:07.040 --> 0:09:10.080 to Judaism. So this was a conversation I overheard in 0:09:10.120 --> 0:09:13.760 my kitchen with Rabbi Kasd. In the affrementioned Rabbi Kasden, 0:09:14.200 --> 0:09:17.679 we got mitzvahed, your ex wife, and myself, and he 0:09:17.720 --> 0:09:19.400 was talking to my father saying, well, we would have 0:09:19.440 --> 0:09:22.679 to convert Rita to Judaism. And I remember going, what 0:09:22.720 --> 0:09:25.840 do you mean convert? I thought mom was Jewish and 0:09:25.880 --> 0:09:27.880 my Dad's like, no, Mom's Mormon. And I was like, 0:09:27.920 --> 0:09:30.360 what's Mormon? And my Dad's like, don't worry about it 0:09:30.480 --> 0:09:33.840 right now. And then I read the Book of Mormon 0:09:34.080 --> 0:09:36.600 about a year later, and you know, I just threw 0:09:36.640 --> 0:09:38.480 it at my mother. I go, you can't be serious 0:09:38.480 --> 0:09:42.280 with this nonsense. Yeah, well, it's interesting. So your grandfather 0:09:42.400 --> 0:09:47.080 served in the German army in World War Two. Yeah, 0:09:47.120 --> 0:09:49.240 and they sent him to the Russian Front because he 0:09:49.280 --> 0:09:52.040 was one of those soldiers, like many German Men, who 0:09:52.120 --> 0:09:54.160 wanted no part of it, but they didn't. You know, 0:09:54.840 --> 0:09:57.560 your family was at risk, so you had to serve 0:09:57.600 --> 0:09:59.839 in some way. But when they tested you to get 0:09:59.840 --> 0:10:02.000 in army, you know, he just he was a very 0:10:02.000 --> 0:10:05.280 physically strong guy. He kind of just didn't demonstrate any 0:10:05.320 --> 0:10:08.040 of that so that he would be you know, really 0:10:08.320 --> 0:10:11.560 relegated to some kind of desk job or something. But 0:10:11.640 --> 0:10:14.760 they ended up setting him to the Russian Front, and uh, 0:10:14.880 --> 0:10:18.360 that's where he was taken as a pow. Interesting origins here, 0:10:18.480 --> 0:10:20.600 and you know, in factually did an episode not long 0:10:20.640 --> 0:10:24.200 ago about Hitler, the Third Reich and drugs and would 0:10:24.200 --> 0:10:27.520 a pivotal role drugs play like in the Blitz Creek 0:10:27.760 --> 0:10:30.720 and amphetamine not weed or anything like that, you know, 0:10:30.760 --> 0:10:33.440 when the Germans invaders so quickly through Belgium in France. 0:10:33.720 --> 0:10:35.920 But you know, going back, Chelsea, yourman being a Mormon, 0:10:36.000 --> 0:10:37.680 I mean, the Mormons are so like you know, not 0:10:37.800 --> 0:10:41.000 just no weed or alcohol. It's not even any coffee 0:10:41.040 --> 0:10:43.400 or anything like that. Ye, your mom was still kind 0:10:43.400 --> 0:10:46.200 of open minded about that stuff. Uh My mom I 0:10:46.240 --> 0:10:49.200 think was tired mostly. I mean she had had six children. 0:10:49.320 --> 0:10:52.040 I was the youngest, and I was like a hellion, 0:10:52.320 --> 0:10:55.200 Like I came on the scene and was, uh, you know, 0:10:55.360 --> 0:10:57.880 just challenging them at every turn. I was, you know, 0:10:57.960 --> 0:11:00.240 but three years old, telling my parents what I've thought 0:11:00.240 --> 0:11:02.240 of them, asking them if I had a dowry, what 0:11:02.360 --> 0:11:05.720 the game plan was for savings. I just constantly was 0:11:05.880 --> 0:11:09.439 challenging them, and being the youngest, that's typically what happens. 0:11:09.480 --> 0:11:13.400 You know, you absorb your older siblings sensibilities and you 0:11:13.440 --> 0:11:15.600 pick up on everything and you're listening to everything. So 0:11:15.640 --> 0:11:19.080 you grew up very quickly. And I've had a strong 0:11:19.120 --> 0:11:21.960 personality in my whole life. So my mom wasn't going 0:11:22.000 --> 0:11:24.320 to challenge me on any of that stuff. She only 0:11:24.360 --> 0:11:28.079 returned to Mormonism after my brother died. He had a 0:11:28.160 --> 0:11:31.120 terrible accident and he was the oldest, and then she 0:11:31.200 --> 0:11:34.560 became religious again, as one does. She kind of returned 0:11:34.600 --> 0:11:38.920 to her Mormonism to find solace there within the grieving process, 0:11:38.960 --> 0:11:41.160 I think, and you remained Mormon throughout the rest of 0:11:41.200 --> 0:11:45.480 her life. But yeah, she wasn't sanctimonious or you know, 0:11:45.720 --> 0:11:48.400 trying to instill her beliefs in me. She just was 0:11:48.440 --> 0:11:51.640 doing her thing and wanted to be left alone doing that. 0:11:52.320 --> 0:11:54.800 And I remember also that she struggled with breast cancer 0:11:54.800 --> 0:11:57.120 for a long time. Was there any thought of her 0:11:57.240 --> 0:12:00.120 using medical merl wanted to deal with NOI your from 0:12:00.200 --> 0:12:02.959 chemotherapy and all that sort of thing. No, that was 0:12:03.000 --> 0:12:06.360 pretty much before that was you know, thought to be acceptable. Really, 0:12:06.520 --> 0:12:09.320 you know, that never even came up. So it was 0:12:09.360 --> 0:12:12.520 a long time ago, but I guess, yeah, it feels 0:12:12.600 --> 0:12:15.760 like it was before the advent of people understanding that 0:12:15.800 --> 0:12:19.160 you know, marijuana comes from that ground and that it's 0:12:19.200 --> 0:12:22.080 from Mother nature. M you know, just to shift away 0:12:22.080 --> 0:12:24.000 from the drug thing for a second. Um, you know, 0:12:24.080 --> 0:12:26.559 I was wondering about this. I mean, you just talked about, 0:12:26.600 --> 0:12:28.920 you know, you're Jewish growing up and such, and I 0:12:28.960 --> 0:12:32.640 think about, you know, the so many of the famous comedians, 0:12:32.679 --> 0:12:35.120 both male and female, but with the female commediany. Think 0:12:35.160 --> 0:12:38.800 about Joan River, you know, Goldie Hawn or Sarah Silverman, 0:12:38.840 --> 0:12:40.600 who I guess comes up just a little before you, 0:12:40.720 --> 0:12:44.160 or Amy Schumer more recently. I mean, when you think 0:12:44.200 --> 0:12:46.720 about it, do you how do you think you're growing 0:12:46.800 --> 0:12:50.720 up Jewish? And this, I mean does it shape comedy? 0:12:51.160 --> 0:12:53.120 Is there a reason why there seems to be a 0:12:53.160 --> 0:12:58.200 disproportionate number of Jews doing comedy in America. Yeah, yeah, 0:12:58.280 --> 0:13:00.480 I would say, so you have a sharper sense of 0:13:00.559 --> 0:13:05.320 humor by being you know, persecuted. You have that feeling. 0:13:05.400 --> 0:13:07.839 Whether that happened to our generation per say, where we 0:13:07.880 --> 0:13:10.240 grew up or not. I mean, I think that's intergenerational. 0:13:10.640 --> 0:13:12.559 You know, you always feel like as a Jew until 0:13:12.559 --> 0:13:15.360 you come to Hollywood, that you're in the minority, even 0:13:15.360 --> 0:13:17.960 though I grew up in a very Italian Jewish neighborhood 0:13:18.000 --> 0:13:20.199 and Livingston like it was very there was lots of 0:13:20.240 --> 0:13:23.480 Jewish people, but it's just a very kind of I 0:13:23.520 --> 0:13:26.319 don't know, there's something very self deprecating about being Jewish 0:13:26.360 --> 0:13:31.600 because there's humility in it. Hm and um, you know, 0:13:31.800 --> 0:13:35.400 before we get into cannabis, because I can just I mean, 0:13:35.440 --> 0:13:38.000 you're all over the place in the media. You're on 0:13:38.120 --> 0:13:41.959 more popular programs and news programs talking about how wonderful 0:13:42.000 --> 0:13:43.520 Merril winter is almost that I can think of. But 0:13:43.559 --> 0:13:46.880 before we go there, you know, it seems like alcohol 0:13:47.240 --> 0:13:49.960 was pretty much the dominant drug in your life throughout 0:13:49.960 --> 0:13:52.400 your twenties, and that on the one hand, it seemed 0:13:52.400 --> 0:13:55.360 like it almost became a problem, but never really and 0:13:55.440 --> 0:13:58.280 maybe it was great and you stand by it, but 0:13:58.320 --> 0:14:01.520 there was I mean, just talk about your relationship with 0:14:02.000 --> 0:14:05.120 especially in your younger years, and had that evolved. Well. 0:14:05.200 --> 0:14:07.520 I was very much a party girl, and I talked 0:14:07.520 --> 0:14:09.760 about it and made a living talking about it. Like 0:14:09.920 --> 0:14:12.640 you know, I was rewarded for talking about it. My 0:14:12.760 --> 0:14:16.240 first book was called My Horizontal Life, a collection of 0:14:16.240 --> 0:14:18.480 one night stands, and you know, people were like, oh 0:14:18.520 --> 0:14:20.160 my god, I can't believe you got away with writing 0:14:20.160 --> 0:14:22.800 a book about that. I'm like, why, what's the problem. 0:14:22.840 --> 0:14:24.720 You know, I got a TV show where I talked 0:14:24.760 --> 0:14:27.920 about alcohol and drug use openly, and I think for 0:14:27.960 --> 0:14:30.800 a while I was probably over using alcohol because of 0:14:30.840 --> 0:14:33.000 what happened with my brother. The trauma of you know, 0:14:33.040 --> 0:14:35.360 my brother dying at that young age and never really 0:14:35.920 --> 0:14:40.280 having the tools to access or articulate that pain, you know, 0:14:40.480 --> 0:14:43.920 and react to it. My parents didn't have the wherewithal 0:14:44.080 --> 0:14:46.400 to get us into therapy and to get us into 0:14:46.760 --> 0:14:49.400 you know, trauma grief, and I think that turns into 0:14:49.640 --> 0:14:52.120 I don't think I know from going to therapy as 0:14:52.160 --> 0:14:55.600 an adult, that that kind of delayed grief. You know, 0:14:56.000 --> 0:14:59.480 you use drugs or you use alcohol to, you know, 0:15:00.120 --> 0:15:02.360 cover up your pain, and you don't think that there's 0:15:02.400 --> 0:15:06.560 a problem. You just think you're a fun person. So uh, 0:15:06.680 --> 0:15:09.560 I think that's in my twenties and the abuse of alcohol, 0:15:09.680 --> 0:15:12.440 probably to certain degrees, I never was a problem where 0:15:12.480 --> 0:15:14.520 I had to, like you know, go to rehab or anything. 0:15:14.560 --> 0:15:16.800 I was always able to cut it out if I 0:15:16.800 --> 0:15:20.120 had needed to, or tone it down when I needed to. 0:15:20.520 --> 0:15:22.560 But I have to say, no one really ever even 0:15:22.640 --> 0:15:25.960 asked me to tone it down because I was doing 0:15:26.000 --> 0:15:28.840 well in all facets of my life. If that are measurable, 0:15:29.040 --> 0:15:31.560 you know, it's kind of an inside job for you 0:15:31.600 --> 0:15:33.320 to take a look at why you want to drink 0:15:33.360 --> 0:15:35.520 so much or why you lean on alcohol in the 0:15:35.520 --> 0:15:38.640 way you do. So nobody ever brought it to my attention. 0:15:38.680 --> 0:15:42.080 It was definitely part of my persona and it still is. 0:15:42.200 --> 0:15:44.280 I still drink, Obviously, I don't drink like I did 0:15:44.320 --> 0:15:47.480 my my twenties because now I understand you know the 0:15:47.520 --> 0:15:50.280 ill effects of drinking and the deleterious impact it has 0:15:50.320 --> 0:15:53.440 on you, and you know how to use it more responsibly. 0:15:53.440 --> 0:15:55.520 Plus I'm forty seven years old. It doesn't feel good 0:15:55.520 --> 0:15:57.600 to drink like that, Like I don't have a desire 0:15:57.720 --> 0:16:02.240 like that anymore, but I can still tiwan on ethant 0:16:02.800 --> 0:16:05.120 uh huh. I saw someplace you said, Josie said, if 0:16:05.160 --> 0:16:07.800 I was an alcoholic, I'd be a functional alcoholic. And 0:16:07.920 --> 0:16:09.720 I guess you would never have describe yourself an alcoholic, 0:16:09.720 --> 0:16:11.400 even if you were drinking too much of times, because 0:16:11.440 --> 0:16:13.280 you could always stop when you wanted to, and you 0:16:13.280 --> 0:16:15.160 would just clean out and clean out and all that, 0:16:15.400 --> 0:16:17.240 and it never really cost your professionally. It's not as 0:16:17.280 --> 0:16:20.160 if you're out there doing sets and you realize that 0:16:20.200 --> 0:16:22.760 you were screwing up or forgetting lines or this sort 0:16:22.800 --> 0:16:25.320 of stuff, for being off. Although you also talked about 0:16:25.360 --> 0:16:27.440 sometimes not you know, next morning, not remembering the last 0:16:27.480 --> 0:16:31.360 that you did. Yeah, well, yes, that definitely did happen. 0:16:31.720 --> 0:16:34.480 And so there were instances. It just wasn't a comment, 0:16:34.880 --> 0:16:38.200 It wasn't a recurring theme, like it didn't happen over 0:16:38.240 --> 0:16:41.200 and over again. It happened a couple of times, and 0:16:41.240 --> 0:16:43.160 you know, they very much kind of woke me up 0:16:43.200 --> 0:16:45.160 and said, okay, this is you're going a little too 0:16:45.160 --> 0:16:47.600 far here. Now you have to get yourself under control. 0:16:47.680 --> 0:16:51.720 So I've always had a very like um decent, you know, 0:16:51.880 --> 0:16:54.760 sense of self awareness with regard to my drinking and 0:16:54.760 --> 0:16:58.200 how it's affecting my career. And if it was so, yeah, 0:16:58.280 --> 0:17:02.240 it never got to a place where where that you know, 0:17:02.240 --> 0:17:04.399 where anybody had to sit me down and say, okay, 0:17:04.840 --> 0:17:07.159 you know, let's get a grip here. And did you 0:17:07.200 --> 0:17:09.320 have a favorite? I mean, I think the second book 0:17:09.359 --> 0:17:12.040 was called are you there Vodka? It's meat, Chelsea? I mean, 0:17:12.080 --> 0:17:14.280 with vodka your favorite booze? Or were you like anything? 0:17:14.280 --> 0:17:17.879 You know, what could be? Wine, beer, could be I 0:17:17.960 --> 0:17:23.199 basically just only drink vodka, uh huh, straight like no, 0:17:23.359 --> 0:17:26.080 I put a little soda water in it. Uh huh, 0:17:26.920 --> 0:17:31.119 you know, like martinis with that kind of thing. No, No, 0:17:31.320 --> 0:17:33.720 I like vodka and soda. That's pretty much. And that's more. 0:17:34.200 --> 0:17:37.080 I mean, the genesis of that is more for dietary 0:17:37.200 --> 0:17:39.840 and you know, vanity than anything else. It was like 0:17:39.920 --> 0:17:42.840 the one drink you could drink without bloating or putting 0:17:42.880 --> 0:17:44.600 on weight. You know, vodka was supposed to be the 0:17:44.640 --> 0:17:47.240 cleanest alcohol. Now they say tequila is, but I'm still 0:17:48.000 --> 0:17:53.280 devoutly vodka drink drink okay, okay? And would you ever 0:17:53.359 --> 0:17:56.680 drink on stage when you're performing? Was that party all 0:17:56.720 --> 0:18:00.600 the time, of course. Yeah, that's part of that. Yeah, 0:18:00.640 --> 0:18:05.520 that while you're on stage. I have been. I have 0:18:05.720 --> 0:18:09.119 been on stage where I didn't remember absolutely. I I 0:18:09.280 --> 0:18:11.520 used to go on tour. I remember my last stand 0:18:11.600 --> 0:18:14.280 up tour. I had to be doing two shows at 0:18:14.400 --> 0:18:16.639 Arena's back to back at the same night, and the 0:18:16.720 --> 0:18:20.160 second show I would barely remember. And I was exhausted. 0:18:20.240 --> 0:18:22.440 I had been doing like eight years of my television 0:18:22.440 --> 0:18:25.359 show or seven years. I had four books come out 0:18:25.440 --> 0:18:27.360 back to back to back, So that's a book tour, 0:18:27.560 --> 0:18:29.560 which is a stand up tour, and I had just 0:18:29.640 --> 0:18:32.840 worked myself into the ground and it became my coping mechanism, 0:18:32.920 --> 0:18:34.920 which is one of the reasons I stopped doing my 0:18:35.000 --> 0:18:36.960 show and I stopped doing stand up. I had just 0:18:37.080 --> 0:18:39.960 had had it. I was exhausted, and I was, you know, 0:18:40.200 --> 0:18:43.120 using alcohol to like get me through the next show, 0:18:43.240 --> 0:18:46.119 to give me energy. And so yeah, that was a 0:18:46.160 --> 0:18:51.160 big turning point. We'll be talking more after we hear 0:18:51.280 --> 0:19:08.600 this ad for alreadience you. A few years ago, Chelsea 0:19:08.680 --> 0:19:13.240 did a series of FOD documentaries on Netflix, like on Chelsea, 0:19:13.440 --> 0:19:16.640 does the Internet, Silicon Valley Matter? When, on marriage, when 0:19:16.640 --> 0:19:19.440 a racism and one on drugs, and you spent about 0:19:19.440 --> 0:19:21.600 a quarter of the episode talking to people who had 0:19:21.680 --> 0:19:25.960 been in rehab being addicted. Um, I mean, you know 0:19:26.080 --> 0:19:27.960 it felt like I mean, part of other parts of it. 0:19:28.040 --> 0:19:29.800 Of course, we're about you know, we'll get into your 0:19:29.800 --> 0:19:32.080 ayahuasca trip and other types of elements of drug using. 0:19:32.119 --> 0:19:35.400 Getting high in marijuana much more celebratory, and so when 0:19:35.440 --> 0:19:37.679 you were doing that part of it, the rehab thing, 0:19:37.760 --> 0:19:39.720 I mean, obviously you're trying to show the spectrum of 0:19:39.760 --> 0:19:42.520 people's relationship with drugs, but when you see people who 0:19:42.520 --> 0:19:44.320 struggle that way, do you just feel like, there but 0:19:44.400 --> 0:19:45.840 for the grace of guy though I or that you 0:19:45.920 --> 0:19:49.920 just simply can't relate, or I mean, you know, what 0:19:50.040 --> 0:19:52.399 did you think about those elements of it. I just 0:19:52.560 --> 0:19:55.639 remember someone saying to me at a very early age, 0:19:55.760 --> 0:19:58.720 or overhearing a conversation, saying, I don't ever want to 0:19:58.760 --> 0:20:01.960 have to give up alcohol, so I'm never going to 0:20:02.119 --> 0:20:05.320 abuse it. And that just stayed with me. So I 0:20:05.359 --> 0:20:09.280 I could relate to these people. But I thought, oh, like, 0:20:09.640 --> 0:20:13.119 I never let it get me, you know, I never 0:20:13.280 --> 0:20:14.800 felt that I had let it get me. I'm sure 0:20:14.800 --> 0:20:16.919 other people would disagree. By the way, I'm sure other 0:20:16.920 --> 0:20:18.600 people would be like, oh my god, she's a lush 0:20:18.720 --> 0:20:21.399 or she was a lush or whatever. But that's not 0:20:21.560 --> 0:20:24.440 really that doesn't matter to me. It's what I you know, 0:20:24.560 --> 0:20:28.240 it's how I experienced it. And whenever I felt like 0:20:28.440 --> 0:20:30.640