Speaker 1: My League Buks has how the knowledge you want. My
Speaker 1: League Buds has all the knowledge you need. My League Buds, Yeah,
Speaker 1: they have all the books that the whole wild world
Speaker 1: want to read. My League Buks. Welcome, Welcome, Welcome to
Speaker 1: Malik's Bookshop, bringing a world together with books, culture, and community. Hi,
Speaker 1: my name is Malik, your host of Malik's Bookshop. Welcome everybody.
Speaker 1: This is a special episode because I'm interviewing the beacon
Speaker 1: and the heart of my life. That's my mother. She
Speaker 1: going through some challenges right now. I came out to
Speaker 1: visit her, and we lived three thousand miles away. While
Speaker 1: I was here comforting her and embracing her and acknowledging
Speaker 1: her for the gift of life and all all that
Speaker 1: she has provided. I told her, you're gonna be my
Speaker 1: featured on my next podcast because I would just want
Speaker 1: to talk to you about you and about things that
Speaker 1: I am important to you and what you're grateful for,
Speaker 1: what motivates you, what inspires you. When you live long enough,
Speaker 1: you have a lot of wisdom that you can offer.
Speaker 1: You have a lot of insight. And my mom's seventy eight.
Speaker 1: She's been a beacon in my life. She's influenced me
Speaker 1: in all kinds of ways, and this is an excellent
Speaker 1: opportunity for me to have a deep conversation with her
Speaker 1: and introduce her to my audience on Mali's Bookshelf. So
Speaker 1: this is what this episode is all about. Mama speaking
Speaker 1: to Malik. This is his story. I'm about to interview
Speaker 1: my mom from a podcast, Malik's Book Show, Bringing a
Speaker 1: World Together with Books, culture and Community. Now I hadn't
Speaker 1: done about sixty one episodes, but this time I'm gonna
Speaker 1: interview my mom. So this is his story. This is
Speaker 1: I'm sitting right by. I flew all the way to Washington,
Speaker 1: DC spend some time with her, and I just said,
Speaker 1: you know what, I haven't done an interview with my mom.
Speaker 1: So I'm gonna sitting here and I'm gonna have a
Speaker 1: conversation about my mom. Who's the matriarch and the foundation
Speaker 1: of our family. And how are you doing? Mom? Praise
Speaker 1: the Lord. Hello. Well, I'm just excited about our interview.
Speaker 1: You know, I didn't interview the kids, I didn't interview
Speaker 1: my wife. Now I get a chance to interview you.
Speaker 1: Now say hi to my audience at Malik's Bookshelf. Hello,
Speaker 1: Malik audience at Malik's Book Yeah. Yeah, so glad to
Speaker 1: be here today because just today I was very sick.
Speaker 1: And every day it's a new day. Morning by morning,
Speaker 1: new mercies up here. So I'm glad to be able
Speaker 1: to sit up and have this interview with my son.
Speaker 1: That's Sudden number one, Sun number one. Yeah, this interview
Speaker 1: is very important for me because you know, none of
Speaker 1: us promise tomorrow. You know, we give thanks for every
Speaker 1: day and we do. And I'm trying to spend as
Speaker 1: much time and much you know, I flew all the
Speaker 1: way out. He had been out here about three times
Speaker 1: in the last six months, and uh, and I'm trying
Speaker 1: to spend as much time while we're going through this,
Speaker 1: you know, this bottle and were praying for a miracle
Speaker 1: and the day, you know, you're feeling good, you're feeling vibrant.
Speaker 1: And so this interview is going to be historic because
Speaker 1: you know, it's something that I'm gonna personally cherish for
Speaker 1: the rest of my life. Something because I'm sharing a
Speaker 1: little bit of you with Malik's book shelf audience. So
Speaker 1: just you know, so my audience can know a little
Speaker 1: bit about you. Can you introduce yourself, some of the things,
Speaker 1: some of the accomplishments, and some of the highlights of
Speaker 1: your life. I guess I'm gonna say that the greatest
Speaker 1: part of my life, it's being born in this world
Speaker 1: by my mother Crusade to praise Scott, who hasn't stilled
Speaker 1: so much of her and her wisdom and to me
Speaker 1: throughout the years. Sometimes she thought I wasn't listening, but
Speaker 1: I was, and she was had a deep, deep spiritual insight,
Speaker 1: and she shared so many things with me that it
Speaker 1: is a part of my life today, you know, a
Speaker 1: part of my life today. You know, major influence. Right.
Speaker 1: You don't let nobody be better to you than you
Speaker 1: are to them. I mean those other things that she
Speaker 1: used to say. So when a person is nice and
Speaker 1: kind and good to you, you don't forget those things.
Speaker 1: You should remember them also, So things like that, It
Speaker 1: just becomes a part of your life. Absolutely absolutely, I
Speaker 1: know personally, did Grandmon Scott had a major influence on
Speaker 1: your life? Entrepreneur? Yes, you're entrepreneur, to go get it.
Speaker 1: A broker, you know, so real estate, had a daycare,
Speaker 1: had a used to sell uh, you know, food at
Speaker 1: events and things like that. You go where there's a will,
Speaker 1: there's a way. I gotta have more one than one
Speaker 1: iron in the fight. Yes, so one slowed down and
Speaker 1: doesn't work, you work on the other one, absolutely. You know.
Speaker 1: I tell people all the time now that um, my
Speaker 1: grandmother influenced my mother and she they were self employed,
Speaker 1: they were entrepreneurs, and it influenced me, you know. And
Speaker 1: when you get despair, I got it from them. They
Speaker 1: passed it on to me. They passed it on to me.
Speaker 1: I had strong black women in my life, and you know,
Speaker 1: and and I think that, you know, I'm so happy
Speaker 1: I can acknowledge that, you know, I'm that I understand
Speaker 1: and aware of that, and and you know, I personally,
Speaker 1: you know, you know, thank God, and I thank you
Speaker 1: for being a major significant part of you know, with
Speaker 1: the things that I'm doing today as a book and
Speaker 1: being not fearful of being self employed and being an
Speaker 1: entrepreneur because you know, you know, I know Grandma would
Speaker 1: always talk about that having that W two, having that
Speaker 1: W two working for somebody, but some of us not
Speaker 1: made for that. She pushed us, She pushed you, You
Speaker 1: pushed me, And I'm pushing the next generation to be,
Speaker 1: you know, the next generation of self employed entrepreneurs do
Speaker 1: for self what have you? And so no one can
Speaker 1: pay you for what you are worth. So when you
Speaker 1: find out where you need to be in life and
Speaker 1: what you here on this planet for, and it is
Speaker 1: instilled in you because we all, we all have have
Speaker 1: gifts and talents. But sometimes you don't know where yours lie.
Speaker 1: You don't know what you need to be doing and
Speaker 1: what will bring the best out of you. So you
Speaker 1: have to seek that. Yes, yes, you have to seek that.
Speaker 1: And when you find that, you found your purpose. That's
Speaker 1: called your purpose. And when you find out what your
Speaker 1: purpose in life is, then that can help you to
Speaker 1: go on the bigger and better things, which no matter
Speaker 1: how much you work for somebody else, it'll never take
Speaker 1: you to that level. A man, that's real talk. There
Speaker 1: is that because we ask me, um something similar to that.
Speaker 1: They say, hey, you know, they say, um, you know,
Speaker 1: do you do you um sometimes feel uh you know,
Speaker 1: but not having a stable income and by working for
Speaker 1: somebody else, you know, um, how do you get through
Speaker 1: those rough times? And do you feel sometimes that uh,
Speaker 1: you know, the fear set in when you when you know,
Speaker 1: hit those hard times because you're working for yourself. I said,
Speaker 1: you're gonna go through that with any job or any
Speaker 1: or any profession. They're gonna be highs and they're gonna
Speaker 1: be low. But the one thing that I know about
Speaker 1: being self employed, I know that payday could be every day,
Speaker 1: and I know that that um, like you said, no
Speaker 1: one could pay you for your work. And so I'd
Speaker 1: rather work for myself than work for somebody else, because
Speaker 1: you know, I'm my own boss and I'd rather give
Speaker 1: orders and take orders. So so I love being self employed.
Speaker 1: I love it. And so we talked about you know,
Speaker 1: you mentioned Grandma Scott being a source and a pillar
Speaker 1: strength in your life and guides and influence. Now who's
Speaker 1: some of your role models? Other role models in your life?
Speaker 1: I'm fearing to think because the only other role models
Speaker 1: is the Word of God in my life is the
Speaker 1: whole Bible to read and understand and to know. And
Speaker 1: that shows me rod with as far as I mean,
Speaker 1: I know that m Michelle Obama and all those people
Speaker 1: are great, and Oprah Win friends all those people, but
Speaker 1: necessarily spiritually they're not where I am and I'm not
Speaker 1: where they are, so I can look at them and
Speaker 1: appreciate their accomplishments. But yet and still I have a
Speaker 1: different mindset about a lot of things that they would
Speaker 1: look at it one way and I look at it
Speaker 1: at another. So I really don't have a person that
Speaker 1: I can say, oh, you know, that's fair, Yeah, that's fair.
Speaker 1: I don't. So what's some of your memorable moments in life.
Speaker 1: I got a lot of them. Well, just give us
Speaker 1: three to stand out the most. The time I was
Speaker 1: sleeping in the bed and my girlfriend called me up
Speaker 1: and said, come on, come on, go out for a ride.
Speaker 1: And I said, I'm in the bed asleep. She's on.
Speaker 1: Put some clubs on. Come on, let's go out for
Speaker 1: a ride. Say, my friend got a brand new cop
Speaker 1: and we're gonna ride down Haynes Point. That's down by
Speaker 1: the tone grew down by the monument and the and
Speaker 1: the me Mememorial and all that. That's called Haines Point here.
Speaker 1: So I said, okay, it was a nice summer evening
Speaker 1: and I'm gonna get up out my bed, put on
Speaker 1: me some clothes, and I'm gonna go riding. Well, sometimes
Speaker 1: you need to stay where you are. And sometimes if
Speaker 1: you had a really so the wisdom of God before
Speaker 1: you made that move. You want to stay where you were,
Speaker 1: But I said, oh, what's wrong with I'll get up
Speaker 1: and I'll go for the ride. So I got up,
Speaker 1: put some clothes on and went for a ride down
Speaker 1: Hayes Point. And her friend, her name was Annie, and
Speaker 1: her friend with the brand new car, decided he wanted
Speaker 1: to test it out and see how fast he could
Speaker 1: go down the Hayes Point in the middle of the night.
Speaker 1: Nobody wasn't there. You ain't see a foe but us.
Speaker 1: So he put the metal. He put the metal, metal
Speaker 1: to the pedal, and shoot, and and and and and
Speaker 1: and then yeah, the pedal to the medal. That's what
Speaker 1: he did. And then the car went out of control.
Speaker 1: And then he was going and he couldn't take a Charla.
Speaker 1: The cod was going, and all the day I could
Speaker 1: hollow was all Jesus help me. Next thing I know,
Speaker 1: I said, Lord, don't let the car go in the
Speaker 1: water because I can't swim. I can't swim. The car
Speaker 1: hit the tree. Well, it was better to hit the
Speaker 1: tree than he hit the water. Nobody really didn't get hurt,
Speaker 1: nobody got killed. I crawled out the back I was
Speaker 1: in the back seat. I crawled out crawled out the
Speaker 1: car and I could kiss the bell. Said thank you Lord,
Speaker 1: you didn't go into the water. Wow, going to the
Speaker 1: water and the car can't even Oh Lord, Jesus, I
Speaker 1: felt Lord. We had no phones, we had no cell phones.
Speaker 1: We were young people. Was nobody, there was nobody we
Speaker 1: could call, and we started walking. We started walking. But
Speaker 1: that's something I'll never forget and you should wow, because
Speaker 1: that was again God, m he heard my cry. He
Speaker 1: saved me from disaster. And I had two babies at
Speaker 1: that time. I had son number one and daughter number one,
Speaker 1: m Me and La Donna. Yes, wow, so I what
Speaker 1: will happened I come back? I never come back home.
Speaker 1: They when they had no mother, Oh wow, they wouldn't
Speaker 1: they had no mother. But God let me walk away
Speaker 1: from that, and I thank him today. I don't forget. Lord,
Speaker 1: see some things that like you, you shouldn't forget where
Speaker 1: you know how you didn't character and brought you through.
Speaker 1: So that's that's really Yeah. I never heard of story,
Speaker 1: and if you shared it, I never remember. But I
Speaker 1: think I would have remembered something like that, because anything
Speaker 1: where you almost lose your mother, you'll never forget that,
Speaker 1: you know. I never knew. I appreciate you sharing that story.
Speaker 1: I never knew that. Gotta called me up, but I'm
Speaker 1: in it being speaker, I said, see you later. Wow,
Speaker 1: that man, that's a that's a deep story. That is,
Speaker 1: you know, very heartfelt. You know to hear that. I mean,
Speaker 1: just you telling that. I could feel your spirit and
Speaker 1: you're choking up and your eyes getting watering. I mean,
Speaker 1: you know, because so much time has passed since then.
Speaker 1: There's so many beautiful memories have happened since then. Never right,
Speaker 1: experience was about two or three, and you might one
Speaker 1: or two. So y'all with baby, Yeah, I have left
Speaker 1: my babies, and now I'm fifty nine. So look at
Speaker 1: how many years and how many memories, memorable memories have
Speaker 1: happened since then, and all that could have been wiped
Speaker 1: away if it wasn't for the grace of God. Wow.
Speaker 1: Now move into something else. Um, I guess you know
Speaker 1: that was a memorable event. Tell us something that if
Speaker 1: you had to do over, you would do over. Well,
Speaker 1: I got one for that. I would have worked really,
Speaker 1: really hard to keep my teeth because back then in
Speaker 1: the day, they didn't have dentistry and things like they
Speaker 1: have today. So every time you well, I had soft teeth.
Speaker 1: I lose a lot of calcium when I had my children.
Speaker 1: But the only thing that the doctor knew most of
Speaker 1: the time was put a filling in or pull it out.
Speaker 1: So the teeth. When you lose your teeth, you lose
Speaker 1: bone because your bones shrink. When you lose your teeth.
Speaker 1: When the bone shrink, then your jaw line and your
Speaker 1: facial features change. They're not the same because your bones
Speaker 1: have changed. So I learned the hard way. I learned
Speaker 1: the hard way. First I was told the just let
Speaker 1: them take one twothoult because they were gonna fix it.
Speaker 1: I had a gap, and I hated the gap that
Speaker 1: was in my mouth because they always said when you
Speaker 1: have a gap, that means you're a liar. And I
Speaker 1: did not want to be classified as a liar. So
Speaker 1: I said, I don't want this gap. I want my
Speaker 1: teeth to be together. I want them. Well, they got
Speaker 1: ways of putting your teeth together there without taking one
Speaker 1: out and doing something else. So I let him take
Speaker 1: the toothoul. He shaved the other one down, took one out,
Speaker 1: and then there was a gap. Then he made a
Speaker 1: cap to go on top of them, and in time
Speaker 1: where he shaved the tooth down and other things that
Speaker 1: just went solid that didn't work, and at time they
Speaker 1: went bad. So that meant that I was missing teeth temporary.
Speaker 1: I was missing teeth in front of my mouth, which
Speaker 1: meant that I had to go not just get what
Speaker 1: he had planted in there, put in there, pasted in it,
Speaker 1: glued in there. I had to go and get a
Speaker 1: partial denture at a young age. And from then it
Speaker 1: went to other teeth being missing, having children, losing calcium,
Speaker 1: losing teeth, and eventually I ended up with three teeth, one, two, three.
Speaker 1: I said, I'm gonna keep these three. But a lot
Speaker 1: of happens over the years. Like I said, I'm old school.
Speaker 1: I'm seventy seven going on seventy eight. That was a
Speaker 1: long time ago. As are not like that. So I
Speaker 1: tell the world right there today, whatever you can do
Speaker 1: to keep your teeth, do it, wow, because it's a
Speaker 1: part of your health, it's a part of your strength,
Speaker 1: it's a part of your looks. Keep your teeth. Whatever
Speaker 1: you do. That's my advice to the young people. That's
Speaker 1: some good advice, because you know, I think that you
Speaker 1: know it's important for the elders to pass on to
Speaker 1: the youth, you know, anything that they can encourage and
Speaker 1: inspire them. Hey, yours is like you said, uh, keep
Speaker 1: your teeth, you know, man, put your teeth toop. Back
Speaker 1: to day, my mama didn't have no teeth. I think
Speaker 1: she ended up with one. Wow. Wow. Yes, yeah, my aunt.
Speaker 1: You know she was older then my mama. She ain't
Speaker 1: ain't no teeth. That's what they did. That's what they did,
Speaker 1: and that's what they did back the as you say,
Speaker 1: they ruined the life out of people's crowns, crowns or whatever. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you know, a smile is contagious. And who who doesn't
Speaker 1: like the smile showing their beautiful teeth? You know. So,
Speaker 1: but that's a good advice you just gave. Let me
Speaker 1: ask you this, then, what are you grateful for? I'm
Speaker 1: grateful to be alive. I'm grateful that God has let
Speaker 1: me live to see seventy seven years and in May,
Speaker 1: on May to seventeen, if i'm still here, i'll be
Speaker 1: seventy eight. So that's not long now, that's only like
Speaker 1: two months away. Yes, right, yes, so I'm grateful that
Speaker 1: God has let me live through all my sickness and
Speaker 1: everything that I have endured during this past year because
Speaker 1: I only got sick one year ago. One year one year,
Speaker 1: and from one year, I've been back and forth to
Speaker 1: the hospital so many times. I've had so many needles.
Speaker 1: I've had so much over and over again of twos
Speaker 1: down your throat and and different procedures done over and
Speaker 1: over again. But God's been good. And the doctors they
Speaker 1: be amazed because they come and they push on my
Speaker 1: side and something they said, do you hurt? I said, no,
Speaker 1: I don't hurt. So I'm thankful. That's what I'm thankful for.
Speaker 1: The God has still given me life to be able
Speaker 1: to still enjoy my family. The all three just that
Speaker 1: birthdays March the fourth March that was Mollie, Yes, March
Speaker 1: the ninth, that was my youngest son, Darius, son number two,
Speaker 1: and then Livednia, daughter number one, whose birthday was made tenth,
Speaker 1: March tenth. I'm sorry, March tenth. So all three were
Speaker 1: born in March, Yes, March fourth, March ninth, in March tenth, yes,
Speaker 1: So I'm so glad that I was able that they
Speaker 1: were all here, and that's been a many years since
Speaker 1: all have been together on their birthdays. So they were
Speaker 1: able to come together in fellership, one with another, and
Speaker 1: I just thankful for that. And we recognize you, yes,
Speaker 1: because it's really you know, your birthday as well, because
Speaker 1: you gave birth to all of us. So were giving
Speaker 1: honor and giving you your flowers. And indeed I got
Speaker 1: lots of flowers, but loose hard because I'm in my
Speaker 1: mind that's right. So and we want to get honor,
Speaker 1: you know, right now every day we have a chance.
Speaker 1: And let me just say that's about Let me say
Speaker 1: this about you, know you going through these challenges the
Speaker 1: last year, these elements, and how strong you've been, how vigilant,
Speaker 1: how strong your will has been. I mean, you man,
Speaker 1: you showed me another side because I see you as
Speaker 1: a fighter. I don't necessarily know if I ever knew
Speaker 1: you as a fighter like this. I mean, you're fighting
Speaker 1: for your life every day every day and I see
Speaker 1: you holding on and you know, and you're shaking off
Speaker 1: whatever it is people giving up, but you ain't gave
Speaker 1: up on yourself. No, No, my hands and God hands,
Speaker 1: and I say, I trust them and I'm just believe
Speaker 1: it and trusting and I'm just thank them for every
Speaker 1: day every day and new day morning by morning, New Mercies,
Speaker 1: New Mercies. Yes, so thank you. You're a fighter. You're
Speaker 1: a fighter. What would you like to say, um to
Speaker 1: your children? Take this time to you know, to think
Speaker 1: about what you was, what you want to say to
Speaker 1: your children if this was your last day? Well, you
Speaker 1: know what, since I'm doing my own obituary, you learned,
Speaker 1: then that'll be my cluche touche. Hey man. You know
Speaker 1: Ladna uh she mentioned that the other day, you know,
Speaker 1: mama writing her own bituory. I said, well, that's customary
Speaker 1: when you know that you putting things in order in
Speaker 1: case God call you home. Preparing for tomorrow is a
Speaker 1: necessary thing that we have to do. We all know
Speaker 1: that life is only a term and we don't know
Speaker 1: the time nor today when we're called back to home.
Speaker 1: But we give thanks to each and every day. But
Speaker 1: you know, you live in life is to the fullest.
Speaker 1: You know, you got a list of things you're trying
Speaker 1: to do, um and you know you you're not looking
Speaker 1: to you know, right now, to leave. That's when that's
Speaker 1: in God's hands. That's when he wanted to call you.
Speaker 1: But you're fighting every day and I see it, witnessing
Speaker 1: it every day. I'm talking to you. I come home
Speaker 1: and I see the fight in you, you know, and
Speaker 1: it gives me strength and I hope I could be
Speaker 1: as strong as you. When you know, I get in
Speaker 1: a situation where life is, you know, in the balance.
Speaker 1: I prayed that God will allow me to have that
Speaker 1: kind of strength. Man, because a lot of people give up.
Speaker 1: You ain't gave up. You're a fighter. I'm fighting tough cookie. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: Do you have any regrets in life? Any regrets in life?
Speaker 1: I tell you about my would get out you regreteth
Speaker 1: the teeth, That's that's regret, getting about the bed, going
Speaker 1: on the ride. I guess you. I guess I get right.
Speaker 1: That can compass compass uh that as well. But like um,
Speaker 1: I think that you know, if you live long enough,
Speaker 1: you know, you get wiser and you learn things about
Speaker 1: yourself that um you know. So what have you discovered
Speaker 1: about yourself these last few years? I don't think God
Speaker 1: puts no more on you than you can bear. I
Speaker 1: think sometimes things come into your life that might not
Speaker 1: be to your liking. But the most important thing is
Speaker 1: is to not look at yourself for the answers, but
Speaker 1: ask for the will of God, because God is all knowing.
Speaker 1: You might think you know, You might think you have
Speaker 1: the right answer. For instance, you might think you in love.
Speaker 1: You might think you got the perfect man. You might
Speaker 1: and then one day you find out did that man
Speaker 1: is out? Did cheating on you? And then you know,
Speaker 1: what do you do at that point? Do you seek
Speaker 1: God for wisdom for the point to have some type
Speaker 1: of a deeper understanding, or do you just say that's
Speaker 1: it but God knows. Maybe you might say or pray, oh,
Speaker 1: send him back, I want him back, don't let him go,
Speaker 1: whether he might not be what God got for you.
Speaker 1: So if you pray the Gods will, we will be done.
Speaker 1: In a situation, no matter how you feel about it,
Speaker 1: the Gods will be done. And if you ask God's
Speaker 1: will be done, didn't trust it. Whatever it is might
Speaker 1: not be what you want, but on you will see
Speaker 1: God's will was the best thing for me. Whatever happened
Speaker 1: that what you thought you were looking at or how
Speaker 1: you felt it was a fleeting moment or just an illusion,
Speaker 1: and God got. When God give you something, he got
Speaker 1: something better for you. Trust him. Trust him. What's rightfully
Speaker 1: yours is never lost. And if that person's gonna be
Speaker 1: there for you, it's gonna be there for you. So
Speaker 1: don't trust how you feel. Ask God's will to be
Speaker 1: done for it, and they'll never come out wrong. I thought,
Speaker 1: I thought, I thought that, I mean I not didn't think.
Speaker 1: I knew that I wanted this job, and I knew
Speaker 1: there was not many people qualified for this job. And
Speaker 1: because of my experience in the real estate market, because
Speaker 1: I had already finished working a complex that was a
Speaker 1: condos and I knew, you know, about selling the condos,
Speaker 1: that I was the most qualified qualified for the job.
Speaker 1: And that's how I felt about it. Brand new project,
Speaker 1: brand new job from the ground up. So they started
Speaker 1: interviewing people for the job, and so I went in
Speaker 1: for the interview, and I was assured that they're gonna
Speaker 1: pick me. I got this experience, I got the qualifications,
Speaker 1: you know, and when it found it, they were supposed
Speaker 1: to let you know the next day, and I never
Speaker 1: heard from nobody. So I decided, Oh, I'm gonna ride
Speaker 1: up to my office and find out what's happening. So
Speaker 1: I go up to my office and people running up
Speaker 1: to me. Did you hear did you hear? I'm like, nah,
Speaker 1: I didn't hear. Oh so and so and so and
Speaker 1: so got the job. They're gonna be partners and a team,
Speaker 1: and they're gonna work the job. I said, oh, that
Speaker 1: is so nice. My heart didn't feel that way, but
Speaker 1: I said it. I said it. I said, oh, that's
Speaker 1: so nice. So I knew I couldn't stay in there
Speaker 1: very long because I I I just couldn't take it
Speaker 1: to hear that they didn't partner up two of the
Speaker 1: other people that was in the interview as a team
Speaker 1: and I wasn't chosen. So I still had to have
Speaker 1: a smile on my face because everybody expect me to
Speaker 1: have a smile on my face because that's my personality,
Speaker 1: that's part of my spirit, and so they was expecting it,
Speaker 1: and I know it couldn't stay. I couldn't keep that
Speaker 1: smile very long. So I said, okay, but I'm gonna
Speaker 1: see y'all later, and I hurry up and ran out
Speaker 1: to build it. Went down to my car and boo hoo,
Speaker 1: yeah that disappointment. Boo hoo, Lord, I prayed, I asked
Speaker 1: you for this job. I was the most qualified for
Speaker 1: this job. They had to pay them two people just
Speaker 1: to eat, will you? So I went home. I got out.
Speaker 1: I felt low. So I got out the car and
Speaker 1: I went down to the basement to the lord's part
Speaker 1: of the house. And not only did I go to
Speaker 1: the lord's part of the house, I went to the
Speaker 1: back of My back was up against the wall, and
Speaker 1: I was like having a pity party. Lord so or
Speaker 1: some so and so. Lord reminded me, you asked that
Speaker 1: my will be done in my prayer, and I always do.
Speaker 1: I said, Lord, that your will be done. We hadn't
Speaker 1: still been as will were done? Did I accept that? No,
Speaker 1: didn't come my way my way, no way at all.
Speaker 1: That's what I wanted. That wasn't the will of God.
Speaker 1: So finally my husband came home and he saw me
Speaker 1: back in the back, came down there, and I didn't
Speaker 1: want to talk to nobody. I didn't want to talk
Speaker 1: to him. I didn't want to do nothing. I was
Speaker 1: just a pity partying and cried and tell him, oh,
Speaker 1: now I was having to pity party. And he went
Speaker 1: and he put this. At that time, they was a
Speaker 1: tape cosette takes, yeah, cossette tape. I don't think it
Speaker 1: was h rap. Maybe no, these did little little tapes
Speaker 1: and caste. Then we moved to the c didn't. He
Speaker 1: put the little tape in, and the tape was a
Speaker 1: preaching ceremony about walking on the water. And what that
Speaker 1: preacher was saying is that I don't care. And keep
Speaker 1: your eye focused on Jesus. Don't you look to the left,
Speaker 1: don't you look to the right, You focus, keep your
Speaker 1: eyes straight on Jesus, because then you ain't gonna see
Speaker 1: Just look at him. Keep on them, keep on them.
Speaker 1: Don't look at the noise, don't even here, don't let
Speaker 1: him bother you. Look at Jesus. Get up, walk, get up.
Speaker 1: I didn't want to get up and walk, but I
Speaker 1: found myself getting up and I was walking. I was walking,
Speaker 1: and the more I walked, I felt myself being released
Speaker 1: from burden that was on me and how I felt.
Speaker 1: Then you asked me to let my will be done
Speaker 1: now trust me, and I got up and I was able.
Speaker 1: I didn't want to talk to my mama, and my
Speaker 1: mama is my ace Boon cool but in my prayer.
Speaker 1: But now I didn't want to talk nobody. But I
Speaker 1: found myself coming up, coming up, coming up, at my
Speaker 1: lowest point, taking my back come against that wall. You'd
Speaker 1: have been walking out of it, I said, yes, lord,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna look at you and I ask that you
Speaker 1: will be done. And I trust you and I believe
Speaker 1: in you, so I let it go. Months would buy.
Speaker 1: The team was down there working months and months no money,
Speaker 1: months and months and months no money. I was still
Speaker 1: making money. They wasn't making no money because construction wasn't
Speaker 1: going like it was supposed to and they hadn't settled
Speaker 1: on nothing, and they wouldn't getting no money. Then the
Speaker 1: company had policy that didn't give you a little something
Speaker 1: called a draw, but they with so long without no
Speaker 1: money that draw period it ran out. And the same
Speaker 1: young lady that they hired to run the project, the
Speaker 1: snatch man was coming to get her. Call the repot man.
Speaker 1: The repo man was coming. And I found compassion in
Speaker 1: my heart because she she might have been a little bad,
Speaker 1: but she wasn't that far bad. But she was down
Speaker 1: on zero. But I found compassion in my heart to
Speaker 1: give her money. I could have given my money. If
Speaker 1: I was on the project, I would have been just
Speaker 1: like she was, working in nothing coming in. And God
Speaker 1: showed me here compassion. He's all knowing, he knows what tomorrow. Brain.
Speaker 1: You don't trust them, He know those cases, wasn't gonna settle.
Speaker 1: He knew all of that. And then the very partner
Speaker 1: that she had turned the build up against her and
Speaker 1: took the builder and with so else. Now, that was
Speaker 1: a bad situation, but I wasn't a part of it,
Speaker 1: because God heard me when I said, let your will
Speaker 1: be done. So what I'm getting today to tell you
Speaker 1: people is that trust them and believe them. If you
Speaker 1: ask for His will to be done, then what it happens,
Speaker 1: And it's not like you wanted to happen. Have trust
Speaker 1: believe because later on your seat, he ain't gonna fail you.
Speaker 1: He ain't gonna leave you, or he ain't gonna fail you.
Speaker 1: And even though you can't see it at that moment,
Speaker 1: you will. You will. Wow, that was a lesson for
Speaker 1: everyone that had so much hidden and on the surface,
Speaker 1: that was wonderful advice. You know, as you was telling
Speaker 1: the whole story, you know, it just made me think
Speaker 1: about times in my life when I didn't get what
Speaker 1: I desired and I asked God or something happened to
Speaker 1: and I had a gift that He blessed me with
Speaker 1: and that gift was taken away, and how and how
Speaker 1: I felt and how you know, just how like you said,
Speaker 1: going in the corner and crying and feeling a certain
Speaker 1: way and hurt, and how I felt you was making
Speaker 1: me remember all the many incidents, you know, but certain
Speaker 1: things particularly, you know, because they're relevant and present. You know,
Speaker 1: you made me think about all of those things as
Speaker 1: you was telling that wonderful story, because sometimes you know,
Speaker 1: we don't we don't understand, and we don't we're not
Speaker 1: fortune tellers, and we don't know what tomorrow brings. You
Speaker 1: didn't know that that situation was gonna happen. You know,
Speaker 1: you were upset at the moment you didn't get the job,
Speaker 1: but down the line it would have bankrupt you. So
Speaker 1: God spared you from taking the job because you know,
Speaker 1: if you're done that you would have been financially strained.
Speaker 1: And sometimes things happen our life, and we don't know
Speaker 1: to what brings tomorrow. And you know I can relate
Speaker 1: to that, because you know, I spent many hours, many days,
Speaker 1: you know, whimping and crying and moaning about certain things,
Speaker 1: and only to find out you know, later on in time,
Speaker 1: because time so to all arguments. So in time I
Speaker 1: got to know the truth of a situation, because that's
Speaker 1: the only thing that can really bring a true healing
Speaker 1: this time. And I found out, you know, in time
Speaker 1: that why did I even get upset in the beginning,
Speaker 1: Because the time went by, I thought, while God is
Speaker 1: the best, know there's a reason why he did that.
Speaker 1: Because if I had walked down that road, I might
Speaker 1: not be standing here today. Or if I had, you know,
Speaker 1: made that decision to do this, then I might not
Speaker 1: have the house I have now. It's crazy, but that's
Speaker 1: you know, I tell you guys, so I can relate holdingly.
Speaker 1: And I mean I was some great advice and the
Speaker 1: story you told for Malik's books audience, I know they
Speaker 1: can relate. And if they can't, they will later on,
Speaker 1: will later on because if nothing else, life is gonna
Speaker 1: be your best teacher. But trust in God because we
Speaker 1: don't know all things. We you know, we worried about
Speaker 1: the things that we cannot control, and we have strengthen
Speaker 1: ourselves not to worry about the things that we control.
Speaker 1: And when and when we don't get what we desire,
Speaker 1: doesn't mean it's the end of the world. It's just
Speaker 1: wasn't meants for you, because what it was meant for you,
Speaker 1: whatever God give you. You know it's meant for you.
Speaker 1: And if you don't have say it again, I ask it.
Speaker 1: What God gives you and it's meant for you. It
Speaker 1: is never lost. What's yours is yours on purpose. Yes, yes,
Speaker 1: And so that I think that that you know, it's
Speaker 1: a good way to end this wonderful conversation. Um. I
Speaker 1: have one more question, and that is if you had
Speaker 1: to sum you up in one word, what would it
Speaker 1: be in one word? One word? I'm gonna go, my
Speaker 1: mom will look love, send out as much. Love, be
Speaker 1: a principal of love, be a love, is it love?
Speaker 1: Curious everything loved? Loved and fella man, love one another,
Speaker 1: love yourself. Hello, love. Well, I think that you've been
Speaker 1: a testament of love. And I don't say that just
Speaker 1: because I'm your son. I say that because I've witnessed
Speaker 1: you over the years evolving into that. We don't always
Speaker 1: start out that way, but we grow into what we become.
Speaker 1: And you know, your life has been a testament of
Speaker 1: giving and of love and I bear witness to that.
Speaker 1: So that's a great way to define you. Love. And
Speaker 1: I love you, Mama, Thank you, baby. I love you too. Yes,
Speaker 1: I hope my audience enjoyed that I know I did
Speaker 1: coming and give me an interview. Absolutely, thank you, thank you,
Speaker 1: thank you. I hope my audience, I hope you enjoyed
Speaker 1: that you heard a street and you heard it live,
Speaker 1: you heard it organic, It wasn't script. We talked about
Speaker 1: many things, so I gave you a look in a
Speaker 1: window to the spirit and the mind and the heart
Speaker 1: of my mother. And so I hope you listen to
Speaker 1: some of the reveal, you know, things that she shared
Speaker 1: with us and open up things that I even learned.
Speaker 1: So amen, Amen, there we go. Thanks for listening to
Speaker 1: Malik's Bookshelf where topics on the Shelf, our books, culture
Speaker 1: and communities. Be sure to subscribe and leave me a review.
Speaker 1: Check out my Instagram at Molik Books. See you next time.