WEBVTT - "Anti-Brusher" with Ego Nwodim 0:00:01.320 --> 0:00:05.360 Well, let me say this about the no more host. 0:00:05.559 --> 0:00:08.280 I will say that you know you're seeing what's happening. 0:00:08.680 --> 0:00:12.080 We're seeing lifetime, what is happening with the NBA we 0:00:12.160 --> 0:00:16.160 have and the NFL E how they're struggling without homes. 0:00:16.400 --> 0:00:19.800 And so I don't know that we have sports without host. 0:00:20.480 --> 0:00:24.360 Sports and hosts go hand in hand. We're finding that out. 0:00:24.400 --> 0:00:25.800 So I don't know if we want to plan it 0:00:25.880 --> 0:00:28.400 without host. We can have our opinions of hosts as 0:00:28.440 --> 0:00:32.360 we please, but host might again be a crucial part 0:00:32.360 --> 0:00:35.400 of this ecosystem. Wrong. I think I think hose are essential. 0:00:35.680 --> 0:00:37.440 And I'd say this, and I want to be clear 0:00:37.479 --> 0:00:39.800 because some of our listeners are going to take this 0:00:39.880 --> 0:00:42.880 in the direction and say, you can't talk about women 0:00:42.960 --> 0:00:47.600 this way. Hoses everybody everybody's homes anybody, because everybody, everybody's 0:00:47.920 --> 0:00:53.760 everybody st Yeah, y'all, y'all homes they exist everywhere. Let's 0:00:53.760 --> 0:00:56.400 not try to to break this down to some gender 0:00:56.520 --> 0:00:59.240 or race thing. No all, y'all, are some homes. If 0:00:59.280 --> 0:01:02.160 we're trying to this side, how valuable you Holt are 0:01:02.720 --> 0:01:20.639 to our survivors in your quos are racist? The host money, 0:01:21.880 --> 0:01:30.640 she'stern stuff. I can't tell me. Oh, oh there it is. Hell, yeah, 0:01:30.680 --> 0:01:37.360 there is. Ladies and gentlemen, Welcome to another spectacular, amazing, 0:01:37.800 --> 0:01:42.959 incredible episode of My Mama Told Me, the podcast where 0:01:42.959 --> 0:01:46.039 we dive deep, We go deep, we splunk into the 0:01:46.080 --> 0:01:50.920 world of black conspiracy theories, and we agree, We collectively 0:01:50.960 --> 0:01:53.720 agree that you call her Janet if you are regular, 0:01:54.160 --> 0:01:58.440 miss Jackson if you're nasty, and Professor Jackson if you're 0:01:58.440 --> 0:02:02.640 really confused about how vacation works. Those are the names 0:02:02.720 --> 0:02:08.280 she prefers for all of her qualifications, her names. That's 0:02:08.280 --> 0:02:11.280 what Janet's going by now. Professor Jackson if you don't 0:02:11.280 --> 0:02:14.600 know how the school is. I'm your host, Langston Kerman. 0:02:14.720 --> 0:02:17.960 I'm here. I'm in my friend's house still because my 0:02:18.040 --> 0:02:21.120 WiFi doesn't work in my new home, and it is hot. 0:02:21.280 --> 0:02:23.760 Is fucking this house. I don't know why he keeps 0:02:23.800 --> 0:02:26.440 his home so hot, but I'm sweating already and the 0:02:26.520 --> 0:02:30.160 podcast hasn't even started. You know who's not sweating. You 0:02:30.160 --> 0:02:33.000 know who's keeping it coolest ship is my guest today. 0:02:33.320 --> 0:02:37.480 She's fantastic, she's hilarious. You know her from fucking Saturday 0:02:37.600 --> 0:02:40.520 Night Live. It's the coolest show. She's the coolest lady. 0:02:40.720 --> 0:02:45.280 She's hilarious. Give it up from my guests, Ms Eggo, Woda, 0:02:46.120 --> 0:02:49.400 thank you for having me, and that is yes. The 0:02:49.520 --> 0:02:54.280 crowd goes wild. Love it. I love it. What's going 0:02:54.320 --> 0:02:57.280 on with the temperature over there? I'm concerned about I 0:02:57.360 --> 0:03:00.600 am too. He's been my friends since we were in college, 0:03:00.600 --> 0:03:02.639 and I don't know what's going on with his body 0:03:02.680 --> 0:03:05.600 heat that so I think he explained it to me 0:03:05.720 --> 0:03:09.639 that his air conditioner previously did not work, and then 0:03:09.800 --> 0:03:13.080 for some reason he tried it like a year ago, 0:03:13.680 --> 0:03:15.960 it still wasn't working, and he had to try to 0:03:15.960 --> 0:03:18.160 get it fixed in between. Just to be clear, Oh no, 0:03:18.320 --> 0:03:21.680 he's he's begged endlessly for them to fix this air 0:03:21.720 --> 0:03:24.880 conditioner and they've refused. They said, no, you whore, you'll 0:03:24.919 --> 0:03:29.480 be hot, and then okay, you'll be a hot in 0:03:29.600 --> 0:03:34.239 your home. They love alliteration. The weather you speak to him, uh, 0:03:34.280 --> 0:03:36.280 And so he tried to get it fixed and then 0:03:36.400 --> 0:03:39.080 someday he I guess recently he turned it on and 0:03:39.160 --> 0:03:43.560 it did work. But I think his body has has 0:03:43.640 --> 0:03:47.200 calibrated now to the heat, if that makes sense. So 0:03:47.240 --> 0:03:49.680 now he would be too cold if the A C 0:03:49.880 --> 0:03:53.360 got turned on despite the heat waves, I believe, so 0:03:53.600 --> 0:03:56.240 I think he I think he's cold blooded. Now I 0:03:56.280 --> 0:03:59.280 think he's like one of those lizards on a rock 0:03:59.440 --> 0:04:01.760 if that kind of okay, that makes sense I feeling. 0:04:01.840 --> 0:04:04.960 Normally people say cold blood, it's like kill somebody just 0:04:06.120 --> 0:04:11.400 but yes, yes he is. I'm not sure he's not 0:04:11.400 --> 0:04:14.960 trying to kill me. This is I'm in a jungle 0:04:15.120 --> 0:04:19.919 heat that I am struggling to maintain. Maintain, say for 0:04:20.000 --> 0:04:23.039 your friend, though, because I feel bad complaining about I 0:04:23.080 --> 0:04:27.520 just went on a grand tour escaping New York, uh 0:04:28.320 --> 0:04:30.520 for a few months. Yes, and so people let me 0:04:30.560 --> 0:04:33.480 stay with them or stay at their spots, namely, and 0:04:33.520 --> 0:04:35.800 I had like notes everywhere I went, And I was like, 0:04:35.880 --> 0:04:39.000 you can't have notes when someone's letting you stay in there. 0:04:40.279 --> 0:04:45.120 You can't like thoughts. This isn't a luxurious getaway like 0:04:45.360 --> 0:04:49.800 people are doing. You don't get to show up with requests. Yeah, 0:04:50.200 --> 0:04:53.559 the couch is the couch. That's just what it's gonna 0:04:53.560 --> 0:04:58.359 be like. Or you figure out less cost effective way 0:04:58.400 --> 0:05:03.159 to you know, record with internet and in my case, 0:05:03.480 --> 0:05:07.320 all the other things agree. Wait, what was one of 0:05:07.360 --> 0:05:09.920 the requests that you made? What was one of the 0:05:09.960 --> 0:05:13.240 notes that you would leave behind for your Why are 0:05:13.279 --> 0:05:18.320 you gonna do this? Why are you gonna Okay, okay, 0:05:18.560 --> 0:05:20.839 I'm gonna need hold on, let me think back because 0:05:20.880 --> 0:05:22.440 I'm trying to think of whose feeling is I'll hurt 0:05:22.440 --> 0:05:27.560 the least, Okay, Okay, So this is exciting. So I 0:05:27.560 --> 0:05:30.000 feel like I need sunlight. I need natural light. I'm 0:05:30.040 --> 0:05:34.599 a play. A lot of people are lacking natural light 0:05:34.720 --> 0:05:37.400 for your girl, and I was. I was struggling because 0:05:37.400 --> 0:05:39.640 I was like, on one hand, this is a wonderful thing. 0:05:40.000 --> 0:05:42.400 Somebody's doing me a favor. But on the other hand, 0:05:42.400 --> 0:05:46.359 I'm dying inside because there's night this bitch, and you know, 0:05:46.400 --> 0:05:47.960 I could have gone and done my own thing and 0:05:48.000 --> 0:05:50.120 found my own spot. But it was like, no, like 0:05:50.760 --> 0:05:54.760 I don't want to spend that money. Can't you just 0:05:54.920 --> 0:05:59.039 install a better window in your home? Yes? Yes, obviously, 0:05:59.080 --> 0:06:03.599 let's get some. Should I be put out? Let's saying like, 0:06:03.680 --> 0:06:07.160 let's get some east facing, west facing even I'll take 0:06:07.160 --> 0:06:10.560 a south facing window, you know, but a lot of 0:06:10.640 --> 0:06:14.919 north facing windows and people's homes and it really messed 0:06:14.920 --> 0:06:17.320 with my mental So that would be my request, that 0:06:17.640 --> 0:06:22.760 my request, let's get some sunlight. Let's move this apartment 0:06:22.839 --> 0:06:25.560 to the to the east side of the building. Yeah, 0:06:26.360 --> 0:06:29.760 I don't know. Hands up, that's all I requested. It's 0:06:29.760 --> 0:06:35.599 only temporary, a monk believe to come back, exactly right. 0:06:35.800 --> 0:06:38.320 But hearing you shift on your friend and his a 0:06:38.480 --> 0:06:42.839 C situation just made me feel like maybe I am 0:06:42.880 --> 0:06:44.640 going about it wrong. Maybe we can be out here 0:06:44.680 --> 0:06:47.160 given notes to people in their own homes. I think 0:06:47.160 --> 0:06:49.719 we should be giving notes, and I also respect that 0:06:49.720 --> 0:06:52.479 they're going to think that we're monsters afterwards. Okay, you 0:06:52.480 --> 0:06:55.080 know the two can exist, and that's sometimes I do 0:06:55.120 --> 0:06:57.120 a splitting thing in my brain that only one or 0:06:57.160 --> 0:07:01.040 the other can be true. But no exclusive here. I'd 0:07:01.080 --> 0:07:05.800 like to introduce you to the Venn diagram, where you 0:07:05.839 --> 0:07:10.040 can be you can be both preferential and an asshole 0:07:10.200 --> 0:07:13.320 at the exact same time. Okay, well that's me. That's 0:07:13.360 --> 0:07:15.880 me all the way. That's me. I got more notes, 0:07:15.920 --> 0:07:17.720 but we won't get into that because I don't know. 0:07:17.800 --> 0:07:20.080 My friends listen to this ship and we we can't 0:07:20.080 --> 0:07:22.760 afford to get into it because you sent over a 0:07:22.840 --> 0:07:27.080 conspiracy theory that I'm very excited to dig into. I 0:07:27.160 --> 0:07:30.240 personally had never heard this before. This is not one 0:07:30.320 --> 0:07:33.720 that I subscribed to, nor had even I hadn't even 0:07:33.720 --> 0:07:36.840 gotten a briefing on it before this. I'm so excited 0:07:36.880 --> 0:07:39.320 that you sent this. You said, and I'm quoting here, 0:07:39.720 --> 0:07:43.600 my mama told me, if you don't brush your teeth 0:07:43.600 --> 0:07:51.840 that night, aunts, we'll crawl around in your mouth. It's true, 0:07:53.240 --> 0:07:55.240 and I can't and I don't know her to be 0:07:55.320 --> 0:07:58.440 a liar, but I think about that all the time. 0:07:58.720 --> 0:08:01.240 I think, I still think about it, like I almost 0:08:01.280 --> 0:08:02.840 want to talk to her about it now that I'm 0:08:02.840 --> 0:08:05.360 an adult and be like, why were you telling me that? 0:08:05.600 --> 0:08:08.280 Like there was a period when I was younger it 0:08:08.360 --> 0:08:10.360 worked on me. I was legitimately, I don't want any 0:08:10.360 --> 0:08:12.560 ants crawling around in my mouth in my sleep, just 0:08:12.600 --> 0:08:14.840 like these niggas like crawling around while I trying to 0:08:14.880 --> 0:08:18.280 get rest, taking advantage of the real estate. I was like, 0:08:18.480 --> 0:08:21.119 I don't want that. I legitimately remember brushing my teeth 0:08:21.160 --> 0:08:23.720 many a night because of that. Just because of that, 0:08:24.160 --> 0:08:26.920 and then one day it occurred to me, I was like, man, 0:08:26.960 --> 0:08:28.840 because answer so little, You're not gonna feel But I 0:08:28.840 --> 0:08:31.480 was like, you would feel them, I and I feel 0:08:31.480 --> 0:08:33.200 like I said to my mom, and I confronted her 0:08:33.200 --> 0:08:35.200 as a child, and I was like, look, if they 0:08:35.200 --> 0:08:37.079 were really crawling around in my mouth, if ants were 0:08:37.080 --> 0:08:40.000 really crawling around in my mouth, I feel them, and 0:08:40.000 --> 0:08:41.680 how are they getting into my mouth? I don't know 0:08:41.679 --> 0:08:43.480 that I sleep with my mouth open. And she just 0:08:43.559 --> 0:08:46.200 kind of like let it ride, like she just she 0:08:46.360 --> 0:08:48.560 never I think for her it was a moment like 0:08:48.640 --> 0:08:51.240 finding out your kid, No, Santa Clause isn't real that 0:08:51.280 --> 0:08:55.600 She was like, well, it sounds like to some extent 0:08:55.679 --> 0:08:57.840 it was like a loss of power for her in 0:08:57.880 --> 0:09:01.200 that moment where it's like, damn, all right, this trick 0:09:01.240 --> 0:09:04.079 ain't gonna work no more. I just move on, right. 0:09:04.160 --> 0:09:07.000 She didn't even try to defend it, which I'm glad 0:09:07.040 --> 0:09:09.360 because that would have caused I'm sure a wedge in 0:09:09.360 --> 0:09:13.320 our relationship if I was looking back on this right now. No, 0:09:13.440 --> 0:09:16.520 but she fought me on it. She didn't, but it 0:09:16.559 --> 0:09:19.720 worked for a significant amount of time. I think that's 0:09:19.760 --> 0:09:23.480 the difference between like the things that our parents tell 0:09:23.559 --> 0:09:26.360 us that are all our parents lie to us. It's 0:09:26.440 --> 0:09:29.360 part of like it bringing a person up and trauma, 0:09:29.559 --> 0:09:32.160 right is like if you tell me answer crawling in 0:09:32.240 --> 0:09:34.960 my mouth and I believe you, fine, And then at 0:09:35.000 --> 0:09:37.120 the point that I say no, there are no ants 0:09:37.200 --> 0:09:40.120 in my mouth, and you go, okay, fine, we move on. Now, 0:09:40.360 --> 0:09:42.559 you're just being a decent parent. But if you beat 0:09:42.600 --> 0:09:45.720 me for it, now we've got trauma. Imagine my mother 0:09:45.800 --> 0:09:49.040 beating me when I found out there ants crawling around 0:09:49.040 --> 0:09:52.480 and by a mouth, and she beats me for that, 0:09:52.600 --> 0:09:54.600 and that would be that's actually, yes, that it would 0:09:54.640 --> 0:09:58.079 be actual trauma and other among other things, very problematic. 0:09:58.600 --> 0:10:04.240 You permanent. Now the ants are always there. They aren't 0:10:04.280 --> 0:10:07.160 even crawling in the mouth, there in the heart. Ants 0:10:07.160 --> 0:10:09.320 in my heart and not got my passwhip by my mother. 0:10:09.720 --> 0:10:13.320 Let me tell you. I just remember being like so 0:10:13.440 --> 0:10:16.640 scared of that, and like I don't know with ants 0:10:16.679 --> 0:10:20.240 like right now, I'm like definitely, uh it's it's actually 0:10:20.240 --> 0:10:22.800 obnoxiously and I don't find it amusing or like a 0:10:22.880 --> 0:10:26.520 cute personality quirk. Like I'm really scared of roaches and 0:10:26.559 --> 0:10:29.520 I wish I wasn't because I fancy myself a hard 0:10:29.600 --> 0:10:36.280 body human being. Sure, these streets all right, but like 0:10:36.400 --> 0:10:41.680 the roaches, roaches and mice, I can and rats, rats, mice, 0:10:41.720 --> 0:10:44.600 they're the one and same. I cannot do so hearing 0:10:44.640 --> 0:10:46.400 ants were calling around my mouth I'm like, I'm not 0:10:46.440 --> 0:10:48.560 I remember not being scared of ants, but I'm like, 0:10:48.720 --> 0:10:50.600 you just don't want those in your mouth, like a 0:10:50.600 --> 0:10:53.959 bunch of them, a gang ants in your mouth. Ants 0:10:54.200 --> 0:10:58.400 can't be that far from roaches, right on. It's not 0:10:58.480 --> 0:11:01.160 that they're the same, but it's if you got ants, 0:11:01.320 --> 0:11:04.760 you're not better than roaches, right, you're not above the 0:11:04.800 --> 0:11:08.559 possibility of roaches. Right You're probably kicking it with roaches, 0:11:08.679 --> 0:11:10.480 and so that's a different thing. If you're an aunt, 0:11:10.480 --> 0:11:12.719 you are probably at some point I had kicked it 0:11:12.760 --> 0:11:17.440 with a roach, like it's a symbiotic. Yeah. Yeah, y'all 0:11:17.440 --> 0:11:20.200 are kind of after the same ship. And so I 0:11:20.200 --> 0:11:22.079 feel like if there was one night where I specifically 0:11:22.080 --> 0:11:25.080 went to sleep, like, oh no about this ship, I'm 0:11:25.120 --> 0:11:27.840 gonna be asleep and commit to my sleep, but I'm 0:11:27.920 --> 0:11:30.360 also gonna, like, in one sense, keep one eye open, 0:11:30.920 --> 0:11:33.440 like and I didn't actually the eye open, but it 0:11:33.480 --> 0:11:35.400 was just this, like I decided, like tonight's the night 0:11:35.960 --> 0:11:37.760 that I want to put in my mind that if 0:11:37.800 --> 0:11:42.120 I feel ants crawling around in my mouth, like I 0:11:42.200 --> 0:11:45.000 might be ants crawling around in my mouth, God, wake 0:11:45.080 --> 0:11:47.160 me up, Like wake me up. I want to I 0:11:47.320 --> 0:11:50.840 want to wake Oh, I love that you're the prayer 0:11:50.920 --> 0:11:53.440 that you said before you went to bed. It was 0:11:53.520 --> 0:11:57.200 just Lord, uh, please bless me with the power the 0:11:57.360 --> 0:12:02.199 strength to wake up in the of the ants crawling 0:12:02.200 --> 0:12:05.480 in my mouth. Lord. Yes. And then I was like, look, 0:12:05.559 --> 0:12:08.840 that was a smooth sleep. And they remember like waking 0:12:08.920 --> 0:12:11.600 up and me like, I slept just fine. There were 0:12:11.600 --> 0:12:14.080 no ants because in my mind I also remember just 0:12:14.120 --> 0:12:17.360 being like, Okay, I feel them. But also they got 0:12:17.360 --> 0:12:19.560 to come inspect to see if I brushed my teeth. 0:12:19.559 --> 0:12:21.440 They're not they're not gonna know. I know. She wasn't 0:12:21.480 --> 0:12:25.360 selling me on that, Like ants have this superpower to know. 0:12:25.520 --> 0:12:27.920 I was like, they're gonna come and inspect to see 0:12:27.960 --> 0:12:31.480 if I brushed my teeth, and and like like at 0:12:31.559 --> 0:12:33.280 least one of them is gonna come check up and 0:12:33.280 --> 0:12:37.520 see what the situation is. And then, well, this is fascinating. 0:12:37.559 --> 0:12:40.160 Now you're introducing a part of this that I had 0:12:40.200 --> 0:12:43.880 never even considered. These ants are not crawling around for 0:12:43.920 --> 0:12:47.360 their pleasure. Now suggesting that these ants are going in 0:12:47.400 --> 0:12:51.360 as an inspectors of your teeth. Yes, because they're trying 0:12:51.360 --> 0:12:53.000 to find out if they can find something. They're not 0:12:53.040 --> 0:12:55.840 gonna tell the whole the whole crew to come unless 0:12:55.840 --> 0:12:58.240 there's something to be found, right, so they're not just 0:12:58.280 --> 0:13:01.599 like they're not like on the bed, And that was 0:13:01.640 --> 0:13:03.679 the other thing. I'm like, i'd see you know, Like 0:13:03.760 --> 0:13:05.680 I mean, now I know about bedbugs. We don't have 0:13:05.679 --> 0:13:08.680 to get because that's the whole other thing that stresses 0:13:08.720 --> 0:13:11.760 me out. But I'm like, aunts, you'd like see them. 0:13:11.760 --> 0:13:15.080 I'm like, I don't see ants in our house on 0:13:15.120 --> 0:13:17.520 a normal basis. I haven't seen ants in the house. 0:13:17.800 --> 0:13:19.200 So you're telling me aunts are going to crawl in 0:13:19.240 --> 0:13:22.199 my mouth. I'm like, they're gonna send one or two 0:13:22.240 --> 0:13:24.320 to check up on if I brushed my teeth, And 0:13:24.360 --> 0:13:26.079 are we telling the whole crew like it's a party 0:13:26.120 --> 0:13:28.400 over here. She's still got hot dogs in her in 0:13:28.440 --> 0:13:31.640 between her teeth, like you know, just come let us feast. 0:13:31.760 --> 0:13:34.200 And so when I realized, I was like, I would 0:13:34.320 --> 0:13:37.319 feel at least even if I did brush my teeth, 0:13:37.320 --> 0:13:39.240 i'd see an ant crawling away from the bed in 0:13:39.280 --> 0:13:41.720 the morning or getting ready at night. I'm like, I 0:13:41.720 --> 0:13:44.200 don't see them here. And so yeah, I thought they 0:13:44.200 --> 0:13:46.280 would come inspect and let everybody else know it was 0:13:46.320 --> 0:13:50.240 popping off in my mouth that's so funny because well, 0:13:50.360 --> 0:13:54.800 on a number of levels, because the suggestion here is 0:13:54.880 --> 0:13:58.280 that the ants are seeking the crumbs in your mouth 0:13:58.760 --> 0:14:03.120 more than like the in your garbage, than the crumbs 0:14:03.160 --> 0:14:06.320 that have probably fallen in your kitchen floor, even somehow 0:14:06.360 --> 0:14:10.240 maneuvering into your refrigerator and eating the fucking food, Like no, 0:14:10.440 --> 0:14:13.120 we need that sweet too already, you know, just already 0:14:13.160 --> 0:14:15.520 e at that two thoughtop because it's already like and 0:14:15.559 --> 0:14:18.920 it's chewed up for them, ready to be ingested, little 0:14:18.960 --> 0:14:21.480 little bites. I'm just like, this is what they want. 0:14:21.480 --> 0:14:23.480 I've done the work for them in a sense. It's 0:14:23.520 --> 0:14:26.200 in my mouth that's ready to go. I'm asleep none 0:14:26.240 --> 0:14:29.080 the wiser while they feast. And sort of like maybe 0:14:29.120 --> 0:14:31.840 ants are like little sneaky bastards, but I don't ants 0:14:31.880 --> 0:14:34.480 are that sneaky though. Ants don't be that sneaky, Like 0:14:34.520 --> 0:14:37.120 they're pretty straight up. They're straight up there like we 0:14:37.160 --> 0:14:39.360 are in here, like we're in here, and like they'll 0:14:39.800 --> 0:14:42.280 so many ants gathered to look like one big bug. 0:14:42.320 --> 0:14:47.760 Whereas like roaches you come home, Yeah, they sneak and 0:14:47.800 --> 0:14:52.400 they fall. That's how they get you. Because the roaches, 0:14:52.520 --> 0:14:57.280 they there's some mels. They some motherfucker's wait till the 0:14:57.360 --> 0:15:02.800 lights are off and they yeah, they don't bunch of independently. No, 0:15:02.920 --> 0:15:04.800 But I will say, speaking on roaches, if we want 0:15:04.800 --> 0:15:06.640 to touch over, I talk a lot about roaches. I 0:15:06.640 --> 0:15:10.880 feel like I'm so sorry so I think too much 0:15:10.920 --> 0:15:13.600 about them. I want to speak on a specific roach. 0:15:13.880 --> 0:15:16.840 L A roaches are a little more thuggish, ruggish. They 0:15:16.880 --> 0:15:20.840 don't scatter. They don't scatter. Wait, you think l A 0:15:21.000 --> 0:15:23.440 roaches are worse than New York roaches because you're in 0:15:23.440 --> 0:15:25.560 New York. I'm in New York. But let me tell 0:15:25.560 --> 0:15:27.600 you most of your year, I am in year for 0:15:27.640 --> 0:15:30.200 most of the year. But so I should give you 0:15:30.200 --> 0:15:35.040 some backstory here, Lankston, if we have time for your story, 0:15:36.000 --> 0:15:38.360 so everything. So I feel like I maybe have told 0:15:38.360 --> 0:15:41.680 the story. But before I left Los Angeles, I lived 0:15:41.720 --> 0:15:43.600 on the west side of l A. And that's a 0:15:43.600 --> 0:15:46.960 little she she or whatever. My last five months in 0:15:47.040 --> 0:15:49.960 Los Angeles, I moved into my own little apartment in 0:15:50.040 --> 0:15:52.800 Los Spelis adjacent. I'd say, like, right on the board, 0:15:52.920 --> 0:15:55.720 they're important because I was like dirty East Hollywood. But 0:15:55.760 --> 0:15:58.480 it was right on the board, okay, right now, I 0:15:58.560 --> 0:16:00.240 was like, I want to be a hipster. I think 0:16:00.280 --> 0:16:03.720 I am a hipster. I wear birken stocks. Uh So 0:16:04.200 --> 0:16:06.520 I was like, I'm a little bit I fancy, but 0:16:06.640 --> 0:16:09.960 I'm kind of a hipster. So I haven't I can 0:16:10.120 --> 0:16:14.400 handle this town? Yeah, right, move in my apartment. I 0:16:14.440 --> 0:16:17.280 signed this lease. Um so, first time I'm living alone. 0:16:17.280 --> 0:16:19.600 I signed this lease. And the day I signed, I 0:16:19.640 --> 0:16:23.080 go downstairs to like leave the building. My unit that 0:16:23.120 --> 0:16:25.240 I've signed for is right above the laundry room, and 0:16:25.280 --> 0:16:27.880 the baund room is sort of like outdoors. There's it's 0:16:27.920 --> 0:16:30.200 not outdoors, it's under the building. But the door leading 0:16:30.320 --> 0:16:33.520 to the street is like not touching the ground. We're 0:16:33.600 --> 0:16:35.960 right on the street. It's like access to the street 0:16:36.000 --> 0:16:38.160 is right there. That being said, I looked down in 0:16:38.160 --> 0:16:42.600 the laundry room. I see like ten big roaches on 0:16:42.640 --> 0:16:45.200 their backs. They were laid out in the laundry room, 0:16:45.440 --> 0:16:48.600 which is under the unit I have just signed up 0:16:49.200 --> 0:16:53.240 to it. I have a little bit of a panic, 0:16:53.400 --> 0:16:56.000 and I was like, what have I done? I don't 0:16:56.040 --> 0:16:58.800 know what have I done. I'm having and my d 0:16:58.960 --> 0:17:01.680 was like doing extensive research on places. My friend lived 0:17:01.680 --> 0:17:03.360 in this building in the Lake twenty units, but he 0:17:03.400 --> 0:17:06.160 lived on the other side of the building and up 0:17:06.320 --> 0:17:09.680 on the upper level. So he lived there for five years. 0:17:09.680 --> 0:17:11.240 So he has this experience and he's like, I had 0:17:11.280 --> 0:17:13.920 no problems, not a single problem ever, not once now. 0:17:15.080 --> 0:17:18.320 But he's not in the roach on the road of 0:17:18.359 --> 0:17:22.640 the building. The roach sector, oh a lot. So so 0:17:22.640 --> 0:17:24.960 so these roaches were on their back where they liked 0:17:25.080 --> 0:17:27.840 tanning or were they dead? Were these dead roaches that 0:17:28.040 --> 0:17:31.320 you were? I think some some more dead guys, and 0:17:31.400 --> 0:17:33.199 some of them were dead guys, and some of them 0:17:33.280 --> 0:17:35.560 were tanning. I do think because you could see them. 0:17:35.840 --> 0:17:38.520 There's still some movement, right, so there's still life in there. 0:17:38.800 --> 0:17:40.719 They were tanning, But I'm like, you're not even in 0:17:40.760 --> 0:17:44.760 the sun, you know. So that being said, the apartment 0:17:44.800 --> 0:17:49.399 had roaches, and uh, that caused me quite a bit 0:17:49.440 --> 0:17:53.119 of anxiety, and as a person who is deathly scared 0:17:53.119 --> 0:17:55.880 of them, and so I moved out of the apartment 0:17:56.040 --> 0:17:59.199 very abruptly. I say this to say that when I 0:17:59.240 --> 0:18:01.879 moved to New York, my number one Crichier was like, 0:18:01.960 --> 0:18:03.760 I know this is New York. I know New York 0:18:03.840 --> 0:18:07.879 is far dirtier. Uh. My number one thing was this, 0:18:08.119 --> 0:18:11.959 wherever I live, I cannot have vermin at all, Like 0:18:12.240 --> 0:18:14.480 it just I can't happen. And I talked to people 0:18:14.480 --> 0:18:17.560 at work, and some of them wealthy, presumably living in 0:18:17.680 --> 0:18:19.880 very nice places, and they'd be like, you're not gonna 0:18:19.920 --> 0:18:23.200 be able to help it here. You're going to have roaches. 0:18:23.280 --> 0:18:27.080 It's gonna happen. But check this is like it's standard 0:18:27.119 --> 0:18:30.040 in New York City. As a former person in New 0:18:30.119 --> 0:18:32.960 York there was no apartment I was in that didn't 0:18:33.000 --> 0:18:36.679 at least have some roaches. Now, I was blessed to 0:18:36.960 --> 0:18:41.280 have times where there were way fewer roaches than other times. 0:18:41.600 --> 0:18:44.760 But we baby, they were all up in like I 0:18:44.760 --> 0:18:47.560 hate to hear it. No, I was like, and I 0:18:47.600 --> 0:18:50.320 was on something like, no, my faith will prevail you 0:18:50.359 --> 0:18:53.320 by there are roaches, but my God says I will 0:18:53.359 --> 0:18:56.880 have none. Okay, I was on. So I was like, no, 0:18:57.240 --> 0:18:58.919 you could say that. I know you probably live in 0:18:58.920 --> 0:19:01.119 a nice glass place. One of the people that I 0:19:01.160 --> 0:19:03.280 work with, she and her husband had just bought an 0:19:03.320 --> 0:19:05.399 apartment in the city and she's like, girl, we have 0:19:05.760 --> 0:19:08.520 rats in this, bitch like, and she was like, don't 0:19:08.560 --> 0:19:11.399 live on this. She's like seventh floor or up or 0:19:11.440 --> 0:19:13.440 eighth floor above. She's like so I live on the 0:19:13.520 --> 0:19:15.439 ninth floor of my building. But here's the thing, lean 0:19:16.240 --> 0:19:18.399 that's like low key all I cared about willing to 0:19:18.440 --> 0:19:20.600 forego the sun, you know, I said, I with son, 0:19:20.840 --> 0:19:23.960 willing to forego that. I just knew I couldn't handle 0:19:24.280 --> 0:19:28.720 the roaches literally down to take a box with no windows, 0:19:28.800 --> 0:19:34.720 just a shell of concrete. Get yes, absolutely, because I 0:19:34.760 --> 0:19:36.480 knew that New Yorkers too. I was like, I know, 0:19:36.520 --> 0:19:38.960 I'm not gonna call my super in New York and 0:19:39.000 --> 0:19:41.399 be like, hey, so there's a couple of roaches and 0:19:41.480 --> 0:19:44.320 the unit because I knew I was gonna get like okay. 0:19:44.320 --> 0:19:47.359 And I was in a hotel before I started my 0:19:47.440 --> 0:19:51.760 job before was it before I started? No, I just 0:19:51.760 --> 0:19:53.199 started my job. I was in a hotel for like 0:19:53.240 --> 0:19:57.800 thirty days. On day twenty five, there is a roach 0:19:57.840 --> 0:20:01.119 in my hotel room and I call the front desk 0:20:01.280 --> 0:20:02.520 and I'm like, first of all, I'm like, did I 0:20:02.520 --> 0:20:05.119 bring these bitches with me from l A Because I 0:20:05.119 --> 0:20:08.160 haven't ever been in a hotel room. This motherfucker's trying 0:20:08.200 --> 0:20:12.880 to give me. I recognized you, Joseph, Joseph, get your 0:20:12.920 --> 0:20:16.119 grass out of here. I know you. I really was. 0:20:16.520 --> 0:20:18.080 I was like, this was like a cousin because it 0:20:18.080 --> 0:20:21.440 was a different style, it was a different it was 0:20:21.520 --> 0:20:24.000 different shade and shape. But I was like, this is 0:20:24.040 --> 0:20:27.520 the roach. And so I called down the front desk 0:20:27.600 --> 0:20:30.640 and again, this is New York City, and here's my thing. Though, 0:20:30.640 --> 0:20:32.760 to be fair, I've never been in a hotel room 0:20:32.760 --> 0:20:35.040 where I found a roach in my hotel room. I 0:20:35.040 --> 0:20:38.240 have not had that experience. I've also never been in 0:20:38.240 --> 0:20:40.840 a hotel before that time for thirty days, and mind you, 0:20:40.840 --> 0:20:45.040 I'm finding this on day like, and so I called 0:20:45.080 --> 0:20:46.480 down the front desk. I was like, hey, there's a 0:20:46.840 --> 0:20:48.439 I knew I had to lie. I said there's a 0:20:48.440 --> 0:20:51.240 bunch of roaches in my room, because if I said 0:20:51.280 --> 0:20:52.920 it was run roach, I knew that I was gonna 0:20:52.960 --> 0:21:00.560 get like, I'm being overtaken by roach piling up everywhere, 0:21:00.920 --> 0:21:04.240 and we need to get there's a couple of roaches 0:21:04.280 --> 0:21:06.200 in here. I don't know what's going on. So they 0:21:06.240 --> 0:21:10.399 come up. Who comes up first? The housekeeper comes up first, 0:21:10.840 --> 0:21:13.720 and she's like I loved that that. They were like, look, 0:21:13.920 --> 0:21:18.880 just saying Martha will start the real issue. Will actually 0:21:18.920 --> 0:21:21.880 get the professional send the lady that we don't pay 0:21:21.960 --> 0:21:25.600 very much to get deal. What's fucking roaches? I'm like, 0:21:25.640 --> 0:21:28.520 they say, what she's signed up for? So she comes 0:21:28.520 --> 0:21:30.040 and she's like where is it? And I was like, 0:21:30.080 --> 0:21:32.399 it's behind the arm war. I was like, it crawled 0:21:32.440 --> 0:21:34.840 behind the arm and I said, I couldn't move it. 0:21:34.920 --> 0:21:36.480