WEBVTT - Neighboring condom factories go to war 0:00:02.400 --> 0:00:06.280 Hello everyone, and welcome back to another episode of Alchemy This. 0:00:06.920 --> 0:00:09.360 I'm your guest host, James Heeney. I'm sitting in for 0:00:09.480 --> 0:00:15.280 Kevin Pollock today. Let's meet our alchemists in particular order. Cool, 0:00:15.680 --> 0:00:19.439 Welcome to Alchemy This. How are you today? Great? Thank 0:00:19.440 --> 0:00:22.800 you for picking me first. Um, I mean this particular 0:00:22.840 --> 0:00:26.120 order thing is fantastic. I really love it, so thank you. 0:00:26.200 --> 0:00:29.319 Thanks for having me. Great. I've got a question for you. 0:00:29.440 --> 0:00:33.320 It's personalized just for this experience. What is the biggest 0:00:33.400 --> 0:00:37.920 asset that you bring to a softball team? Oh? Uh, well, 0:00:37.960 --> 0:00:40.120 I bat leadoff most of the time and I hit 0:00:40.159 --> 0:00:43.040 opposite field most of the time too, So I get 0:00:43.040 --> 0:00:45.320 on base. That's what I do. I'm fascinating it on 0:00:45.440 --> 0:00:48.760 base Now, is that the most important part of being 0:00:48.800 --> 0:00:50.400 Like you think that that? Like, if you don't get 0:00:50.400 --> 0:00:52.640 on base, what are you doing on a baseball team? 0:00:52.760 --> 0:00:54.840 Or is there other things that are important? Everybody has 0:00:54.840 --> 0:00:56.840 different roles, you know, Like the leadoff guys are just 0:00:56.840 --> 0:00:59.000 supposed to get onto. Then the big boppers come up 0:00:59.000 --> 0:01:00.960 and hit a deep flyball, so even if it gets caught, 0:01:01.040 --> 0:01:03.080 you can score on it. Tag up that kind of thing. 0:01:03.120 --> 0:01:05.200 But it's our job to get on base or for 0:01:05.319 --> 0:01:07.560 people on base to you know, get singles or doubles rubbers, 0:01:07.600 --> 0:01:09.560 driv them in. So and I play left field, so 0:01:09.560 --> 0:01:12.720 I'm pretty good outfielder those two things. All right, get 0:01:12.760 --> 0:01:15.200 on base for the big boppers. Next up, we've got 0:01:15.240 --> 0:01:19.559 Mark Gagliar and hello, thanks for being here today. Hey James, 0:01:19.560 --> 0:01:22.160 it's good. It's good to see you. It's good to 0:01:22.200 --> 0:01:24.679 have you hosting. I'm glad that you decided on a 0:01:24.720 --> 0:01:28.560 particular order as a middle child. Uh, this is where 0:01:28.560 --> 0:01:31.680 I'm like, I feel most comfortable. I'm glad. I've got 0:01:31.680 --> 0:01:34.920 a question that I've personalized just for you appreciate. I 0:01:34.959 --> 0:01:38.959 was wondering, are you better at waking up super early 0:01:39.080 --> 0:01:41.280 and starting work at four am? Like you had to 0:01:41.319 --> 0:01:43.120 wake up before that, get ready and get to work 0:01:43.120 --> 0:01:47.680 at four am, four starting late and working until six am, 0:01:47.720 --> 0:01:50.200 at which point then you gotta go home. Every time 0:01:50.320 --> 0:01:52.840 I think that I'm going to start working late in 0:01:52.880 --> 0:01:55.040 the day and I'm like, I'm just gonna power through. 0:01:55.080 --> 0:01:58.360 I'm gonna start late, and I'm gonna do this I 0:01:58.800 --> 0:02:03.840 inevitably and in bed by ten thirty. So I'll start 0:02:03.920 --> 0:02:06.480 and I'll be like, Okay, I gotta get this work done. 0:02:06.680 --> 0:02:09.400 I'm starting late today, so we're gonna, we're gonna, we're 0:02:09.400 --> 0:02:13.000 gonna go into the night. And now I'm sleepy, good night, 0:02:13.160 --> 0:02:16.040 and I just stumble off to bed. Um. So I 0:02:16.200 --> 0:02:19.640 prefer I don't know whether I'm more productive in the morning. Also, 0:02:19.680 --> 0:02:22.320 I think living on the West Coast, I like to 0:02:22.360 --> 0:02:25.280 get up really early because otherwise sometimes I feel like 0:02:25.320 --> 0:02:28.880 I am three hours behind the rest of the country, 0:02:29.080 --> 0:02:32.520 especially when all of the live morning television uh is 0:02:32.560 --> 0:02:35.200 from the East Coast. If I turn on the news 0:02:35.200 --> 0:02:38.200 in the morning, well they're like, well it's lunchtime. I'm like, 0:02:38.320 --> 0:02:45.119 I've already lost half of my day. So I profess yourself. Yeah, 0:02:45.120 --> 0:02:47.440 I look, I know I should just uh, I should 0:02:47.480 --> 0:02:50.280 just turn on the TV, hit pause for three hours, 0:02:50.880 --> 0:02:54.320 and then at exactly eleven oh one, be like, now 0:02:54.919 --> 0:02:58.720 they can start talking about lunch. Well, I've got one 0:02:58.840 --> 0:03:03.600 last alchemist to reduce, and I've this particular order puts 0:03:03.639 --> 0:03:08.440 Craig Kakowski in the final lineup. Craig, thanks for joining today. James, 0:03:08.440 --> 0:03:11.400 what a what a pleasure. It's so formal too. I 0:03:12.440 --> 0:03:16.200 think I've figured out your m O. It's reverse alphabetical 0:03:16.320 --> 0:03:19.120 by last name. Yeah, that's it. I didn't want to 0:03:19.120 --> 0:03:23.040 say thank you for finding an order and thank you 0:03:23.080 --> 0:03:25.600 for noticing how formal it is. I am regretting wearing 0:03:25.639 --> 0:03:34.240 a suit so hard. I love you, I look good, 0:03:34.800 --> 0:03:38.600 but it's a podcast, so well. I've got a question 0:03:38.640 --> 0:03:42.080 for you, Craig. When watching a magic show, are you 0:03:42.160 --> 0:03:44.840 bothered that it's just a trick and not magic or 0:03:44.840 --> 0:03:46.640 are you able to just let go of all that 0:03:46.720 --> 0:03:50.520 and enjoy the show? Oh? No, I enjoy I I 0:03:50.600 --> 0:03:54.680 know it's a trick, and I enjoy watching good magic. 0:03:55.600 --> 0:03:59.520 And I used to love that Pininteller Fooled Us show 0:03:59.640 --> 0:04:02.760 or fool Us or whatever it is, because I think 0:04:02.800 --> 0:04:04.480 even if you don't know the ins and outs of 0:04:04.480 --> 0:04:06.680 how magic works, and they always kind of dance around, 0:04:06.760 --> 0:04:10.640 you know, revealing how any trick is, but it's always like, uh, 0:04:10.760 --> 0:04:14.880 yeah you did a thing there, and uh we caught it, 0:04:15.080 --> 0:04:18.240 but it was very well done, you know. I like, uh, 0:04:18.279 --> 0:04:22.680 you know, people with craft in their area being able 0:04:22.680 --> 0:04:27.359 to kind of analyze and talk shop within that. So yeah, there, 0:04:27.400 --> 0:04:30.039 I mean, magicians lie to us. I know it's not 0:04:30.120 --> 0:04:33.040 real magic, but I'm blown away by it. I love it. 0:04:33.720 --> 0:04:36.279 And you notice that Craig's answer. It was great because 0:04:36.640 --> 0:04:38.560 me and Gigli already set the table for the big 0:04:38.560 --> 0:04:43.080 Bopper to come in and not get out of the park. 0:04:43.360 --> 0:04:48.160 Everybody's going home now, and you are totally on base here. 0:04:48.960 --> 0:04:53.040 All of today's scene suggestions come from listener emails, and 0:04:53.080 --> 0:04:57.360 if you want priority considered becoming a Patreon v I P. 0:04:57.839 --> 0:05:02.000 You'll also get exclusive content in bonus scenes to get 0:05:02.400 --> 0:05:04.560 ahead of all To get ahead of all of it, 0:05:04.600 --> 0:05:08.040 you've got to go to Patreon dot com, slash alchemy this, 0:05:08.680 --> 0:05:11.359 or if you'd like to suggest a scene the old 0:05:11.400 --> 0:05:14.400 timy way, you can shoot us an email at alchemy 0:05:14.480 --> 0:05:24.600 this email at gmail dot com. That's Alchemy. Um, well, ship, 0:05:24.920 --> 0:05:27.560 let's get this started. This is scene number one and 0:05:27.600 --> 0:05:32.240 it's coming in from Beaker. I dove deep on the 0:05:32.400 --> 0:05:36.359 on the suggestion list, So this starts with Happy New Year, Gang. 0:05:41.839 --> 0:05:45.680 I've lately been bombarded with ads for certain condom brands 0:05:45.800 --> 0:05:50.120 in my Alchemy this episode downloads. Therefore, my scene suggestion 0:05:50.200 --> 0:05:55.400 this time is neighboring condom factories go to war. Thank 0:05:55.480 --> 0:06:01.160 You's hell all trades my Apple for uh for your dorritos? 0:06:02.440 --> 0:06:05.240 Why would I do that doritos are delicious and apples 0:06:05.279 --> 0:06:09.120 suck man. Nobody ever wants to treat My wife always 0:06:09.120 --> 0:06:11.880 gives me a healthy lunch and it's never what I want. 0:06:11.960 --> 0:06:14.360 And I know she thinks I need to be healthier. 0:06:14.400 --> 0:06:17.080 But ah, sorry, I don't mean to take on my 0:06:17.120 --> 0:06:19.960 frustrations on you. That's sorry. You know. Look, I'll do 0:06:20.000 --> 0:06:22.120 it this one time. These are cooler ranch, and it's 0:06:22.160 --> 0:06:25.000 just too much ranch for me. You sure dave cooler 0:06:25.080 --> 0:06:29.279 ranch like, it's fine, Rick, let's just do it. I 0:06:29.320 --> 0:06:32.720 couldn't help. But here, Uh, you thought cooler ranch had 0:06:32.760 --> 0:06:34.920 too much ranch? Yeah, I'm good a cooler ranch, But 0:06:35.000 --> 0:06:38.880 cooler ranch, that's just too much ranch. I don't believe 0:06:38.920 --> 0:06:41.720 in that. Look I brought. I got this little package 0:06:41.720 --> 0:06:45.839 here of ranch dust, just ranch dust in a box. 0:06:46.120 --> 0:06:48.600 I added too much cooler ranch. Andy. You can bring 0:06:48.720 --> 0:06:52.919 ranch dust to the factory. Hell, yeah I can. I 0:06:52.960 --> 0:06:55.960 can't get mayonnaise through because it's it's liquid, so I 0:06:56.000 --> 0:06:58.800 can't make ranch dip. But I can eat the hell 0:06:58.839 --> 0:07:02.000 out of this ranch powder. So you're gonna add it 0:07:02.040 --> 0:07:04.560 to the cooler ranch to make coolest ranch. I don't 0:07:04.560 --> 0:07:08.920 know if we're ready for that. Here, I don't know. Uh, 0:07:09.120 --> 0:07:12.440 it's worth a shot, though, I mean I haven't, honestly, like, 0:07:12.480 --> 0:07:14.560 I feel a little jarred right now. I haven't actually 0:07:14.560 --> 0:07:16.840 seen cooler ranch at the store. I would have just 0:07:16.880 --> 0:07:19.840 saved myself the effort of sneaking in stuff to eat. 0:07:20.600 --> 0:07:24.480 We'll sprinkle it on tops, see how it tastes. All right, 0:07:24.560 --> 0:07:30.560 all right, let's uh it's i'll be honest, a little 0:07:30.600 --> 0:07:33.840 more ranch than I expected. It's too coolest. It's too 0:07:33.880 --> 0:07:36.280 coolest ranch. You know, you got time to lunch, You 0:07:36.360 --> 0:07:41.480 got time to punch out some condoms. Okay, because uh, 0:07:41.720 --> 0:07:46.120 rub X across the streets they don't take much. Okay, 0:07:46.200 --> 0:07:50.400 so they're doubling our output. Yeah, but yeah, come on, 0:07:50.520 --> 0:07:53.760 Mr Tino. Everybody knows that they're they're real jerks over 0:07:53.800 --> 0:07:56.640 there at rub X. They worked too hard, man. Look, 0:07:56.720 --> 0:07:59.960 we're making exactly our quota. We're doing exactly what we're 0:08:00.000 --> 0:08:03.560 supposed to be doing. We get exactly our time for lunch. Look, 0:08:03.600 --> 0:08:07.080 I know that I've branded myself as Mr. Tino's Artisanal 0:08:07.160 --> 0:08:12.320 Condoms were smaller. We're smaller batch. You know, we put 0:08:13.120 --> 0:08:17.320 a lot more thought and effort into each individual prophylactic. 0:08:17.960 --> 0:08:20.600 But we still have a business to run, and we 0:08:20.720 --> 0:08:23.600 still got to get some condoms out there and stop 0:08:23.680 --> 0:08:26.000 some babies getting made. You know how hard of a 0:08:26.120 --> 0:08:28.400 mix it is to make these Mr Tino. I mean, 0:08:28.440 --> 0:08:32.839 they're ten percent latex hemp. It's really it's a tough 0:08:33.040 --> 0:08:35.800 thing to get right. We gotta take our time and 0:08:35.840 --> 0:08:38.520 plus all the sourcing that we gotta do for these, 0:08:38.559 --> 0:08:43.200 like that one factory in western Pennsylvania that we get 0:08:43.080 --> 0:08:45.840 all the hemp from that they've slowed down a little. 0:08:45.840 --> 0:08:48.960 It's tougher to get ingredients now. So we're just biding 0:08:49.000 --> 0:08:51.080 our time while we're waiting on the hemp truck to 0:08:51.120 --> 0:08:56.720 get here. Look, guys, you're making great points, uh, but 0:08:56.880 --> 0:09:00.560 I just know that we are producing a superior brand 0:09:00.600 --> 0:09:05.600 of condom. Okay, and those animals at rubb x uh 0:09:05.640 --> 0:09:09.439 and I you know they're just using pure rubber uh 0:09:09.800 --> 0:09:16.719 across the street, and uh, I don't like it. Well, Hey, 0:09:17.520 --> 0:09:21.280 employee five six three, did you did you get this 0:09:21.320 --> 0:09:24.960 flyer about unionizing? An employer five six one was handing out. 0:09:26.480 --> 0:09:27.840 I ripped it up as soon as I got it. 0:09:27.840 --> 0:09:29.280 I figured would be in big trouble if we were 0:09:29.280 --> 0:09:32.520 caught with it. Here here comes out here comes Jesus, Jesus, 0:09:32.640 --> 0:09:35.360 Jesus here, give it to me, Give it to me. 0:09:35.720 --> 0:09:37.320 I'll put it in a condom and then put it 0:09:37.400 --> 0:09:41.240 right in my secret pocket. Whoa, We don't get searched 0:09:41.679 --> 0:09:48.560 in your pocket? My my, my secret pocket. Do you 0:09:48.640 --> 0:09:53.720 do you mean? Do you mean you're you're at rectum? Yeah, 0:09:53.840 --> 0:09:57.160 that's I thought that that was what the use of 0:09:57.200 --> 0:10:02.319 these condoms were. I mean, we don't get we don't 0:10:02.320 --> 0:10:04.640 get searched. I mean it's not far off considering what 0:10:04.720 --> 0:10:08.600 management of Rubex is trying to do over at corporate headquarters. 0:10:08.640 --> 0:10:13.559 But until now, they haven't really been searching our pockets. 0:10:14.320 --> 0:10:16.000 Do you think they're gonna start search want to get 0:10:16.040 --> 0:10:18.280 caught with the union paper work and lose my job. 0:10:18.640 --> 0:10:21.480 This is the most productive condom factory in town. I 0:10:21.480 --> 0:10:24.839 don't want to be at some tiny condom factory. Wait 0:10:24.840 --> 0:10:27.679 a minute, mom and pop shop. Yeah, look, I know 0:10:27.760 --> 0:10:30.640 we're the superior condom, but you eve. He worried that 0:10:31.120 --> 0:10:33.600 maybe maybe things would be better if we worked across 0:10:33.640 --> 0:10:38.319 the street. You want to make little condoms, they're not little, 0:10:38.320 --> 0:10:42.320 they just make fewer of them. What the condoms themselves? Look, 0:10:42.960 --> 0:10:46.000 I was, I was that's not what the advertising says. 0:10:46.320 --> 0:10:48.400 I want big condoms. You can't hide bunch in a 0:10:48.440 --> 0:10:52.240 little tiny condom. Do you know what? Are you only 0:10:52.320 --> 0:10:56.160 using condoms to hide things in your butt? What the 0:10:56.880 --> 0:11:00.120 it's it's it's a money maker. It's for hiding drugs, 0:11:00.120 --> 0:11:03.240 for smuggling. I mean, sure, you have sex with condoms, 0:11:03.240 --> 0:11:05.720 but not not all the time. When you smuggle drugs, 0:11:05.760 --> 0:11:08.559 you gotta have something to hide it. Him, I think 0:11:08.600 --> 0:11:10.240 I'm ready. You want to put a rubber on? I 0:11:10.280 --> 0:11:13.640 think I'm ready to do this? Are you sure? Yeah? 0:11:13.679 --> 0:11:19.240 I think so. Okay, I brought a few different options. Okay, great, 0:11:21.240 --> 0:11:26.320 Uh okay, this is uh Mr Tino's small batch artisanal condoms. 0:11:26.520 --> 0:11:29.840 Oh wow, are those locally sourced? They are, they are 0:11:29.960 --> 0:11:33.760 locally sourced. That's the responsible condom to buy. Then they 0:11:33.760 --> 0:11:41.440 do k to great. Um, wow, this is really really small. Yeah. 0:11:41.679 --> 0:11:46.240 I don't think that's gonna work for you a big guy. Um, 0:11:46.320 --> 0:11:51.040 well what about rub x um. They say that of 0:11:51.120 --> 0:11:55.079 them are used anally. Okay, I don't know if I'm 0:11:55.280 --> 0:11:58.160 ready for that. Well no, no, I'm not proposing that. 0:11:58.200 --> 0:11:59.920 I'm just saying that's a big part of their ads. 0:12:02.080 --> 0:12:05.000 Vaginal ten percent other all right, well let's start with 0:12:06.559 --> 0:12:14.040 and then maybe um wait that is there something in 0:12:14.080 --> 0:12:22.319 that rubb X one? Yeah, what it's a note, it's 0:12:22.360 --> 0:12:29.160 a unionization fire. What is doing in there? I don't know, 0:12:29.280 --> 0:12:34.800 but they really folded it tight. It says that they've 0:12:34.840 --> 0:12:41.440 all been given numbers. This is horrible. Stewart, Stewart, what, 0:12:42.440 --> 0:12:46.880 Oh my god? What have I accidentally? I accidentally mixed 0:12:46.960 --> 0:12:50.800 up the note that I had hidden. Oh my god, 0:12:51.640 --> 0:12:54.239 I put it in with the ones that were getting distributed. 0:12:54.640 --> 0:13:00.280 What I know, it's unprofessional, but sometimes it just when 0:13:00.280 --> 0:13:02.160 you're trying to make a quota and it's late in 0:13:02.200 --> 0:13:04.600 the day and you don't have the supplies. You you 0:13:04.640 --> 0:13:08.320 work what you got. I know, we the So this 0:13:08.400 --> 0:13:11.080 is what happens on our eleven and a half of 0:13:11.160 --> 0:13:14.880 a twelve hour shift. Maybe five six one is right, 0:13:15.840 --> 0:13:18.200 by the way, What did you put in your ass? 0:13:19.080 --> 0:13:25.800 Just an unlike a totally wrapped, pristine ready for packaging condom. 0:13:26.360 --> 0:13:29.079 It was. It was a lucy. It was a lucy. 0:13:29.480 --> 0:13:31.160 And then at the end of the day I needed 0:13:31.160 --> 0:13:33.960 to package so so I could I got crapped what 0:13:34.040 --> 0:13:37.000 was at hand in arm's reach, and I forgot to 0:13:37.000 --> 0:13:40.040 take the note doubt. You have time to walk. You 0:13:40.160 --> 0:13:45.280 have time to talk. Uh, sorry, you have time to talk. 0:13:46.600 --> 0:13:48.400 You have let me, I'm sorry, let me go to 0:13:48.440 --> 0:13:54.680 the charts. Oh gosh, what is it? Number one? Whatever 0:13:54.720 --> 0:13:58.160 it is, you're right, sir, you have you are talking, 0:13:58.280 --> 0:14:00.800 so you have time to talk. You have time to 0:14:00.920 --> 0:14:04.120 walk your ass over to the condom machine and produce 0:14:04.160 --> 0:14:10.800 small prophylactics, yes, sir, number one. So sorry, sir. Look, okay, look, 0:14:10.840 --> 0:14:13.120 I need you to get that union flyer back if 0:14:13.160 --> 0:14:15.360 you can, because that tells us where we can go 0:14:15.400 --> 0:14:18.160 and win if we're all gonna rally. We got a 0:14:18.240 --> 0:14:22.680 rally together. All right. Well, I'm kind of a I'm 0:14:22.760 --> 0:14:25.200 kind of a stickler about following where our condoms go. 0:14:25.240 --> 0:14:27.440 I feel each one is like a child of my own. Well, 0:14:28.080 --> 0:14:30.120 this is where it is I'm looking at and look 0:14:30.160 --> 0:14:33.040 all right somewhere okay, Oh my god, I'm not going 0:14:33.080 --> 0:14:35.200 to be able to go alone. Well I'll go with you, 0:14:35.320 --> 0:14:37.800 of course I will. It's not safe. You mean it's 0:14:37.840 --> 0:14:41.520 not safe where. Well, it's it's just not safe to 0:14:41.560 --> 0:14:44.560 intrude on somebody about what they're using condoms for. They're 0:14:44.560 --> 0:14:48.880 probably drug dealers. I'm sorry, it's three am. What is 0:14:48.920 --> 0:14:56.840 this regarding I was just about to try the well, okay, well, 0:14:56.880 --> 0:14:58.800 I don't know if you were drug dealing or it's 0:14:58.800 --> 0:15:01.680 not really my business. But I've noticed that you've got 0:15:01.680 --> 0:15:06.200 a shipment um with lot three fifty seven from Rubbacks, 0:15:06.440 --> 0:15:09.720 and uh, we need to to take back some of 0:15:09.800 --> 0:15:12.720 those condoms. I've got some replacement condoms for you here. 0:15:13.720 --> 0:15:19.160 It seems really strange. Um, honey, um uh these guys 0:15:19.160 --> 0:15:24.960 are here, they want to take the condoms back. Oh uh, 0:15:25.240 --> 0:15:28.680 I'm sorry. We we we used the whole pack. Oh 0:15:29.240 --> 0:15:31.880 comment box, Stewart, what do I do you do? Know? 0:15:32.720 --> 0:15:35.080 What are you using my real name for? I'm five 0:15:35.120 --> 0:15:39.880 six five six three? Oh okay, okay, but I saw 0:15:40.000 --> 0:15:44.120 the unionization that you put in there. Oh my god, 0:15:44.200 --> 0:15:47.640 you did. I can't help but notice the comrade poster 0:15:47.800 --> 0:15:54.160 on your wall. Yeah, I'm I'm a communist. I mean, 0:15:54.440 --> 0:15:57.800 is that good for unions? Stu? I don't know. I 0:15:57.840 --> 0:15:59.720 don't know how unions work. I thought I thought that 0:16:00.400 --> 0:16:04.200 stop calling me an. I didn't call you by your 0:16:04.240 --> 0:16:07.200 real name. You don't have to be numbers here, guys. 0:16:07.320 --> 0:16:12.120 You're you're out of the factory. It's just it's taken 0:16:12.160 --> 0:16:14.760 over our lives. We don't know what to do. We 0:16:14.880 --> 0:16:18.600 we every waking moment, we're just constantly getting bombarded by 0:16:18.680 --> 0:16:21.000 Number one about getting more and more condoms out the door, 0:16:21.280 --> 0:16:23.600 and then we start making mistakes. And I don't know, 0:16:23.680 --> 0:16:25.720 I just think it's it would be important for us 0:16:25.800 --> 0:16:29.120 to to union. Could could? I'm sorry, would you guys 0:16:29.160 --> 0:16:31.360 have to come in? Um? Would you like something to 0:16:31.480 --> 0:16:35.240 drink or eat? Had some chips, some drinaus several different flavors, 0:16:35.920 --> 0:16:38.760 and we can put some clothes on too. I mean, 0:16:39.040 --> 0:16:40.640 if it makes you more comfortable. I was, I was 0:16:40.680 --> 0:16:42.880 just gonna bring it up. But it's your home. It's 0:16:42.880 --> 0:16:46.000 your home. It's your home, comrade. Oh, that feels weird, 0:16:46.080 --> 0:16:49.360 you say, it does feel weird to say, what a 0:16:49.480 --> 0:16:52.760 nice home. I know it's really pretty in here. What 0:16:52.840 --> 0:16:57.840 did you mean before when you said yeah, I was 0:16:57.920 --> 0:17:03.760 confused too, I oh me, Uh, that's well, you know 0:17:03.840 --> 0:17:08.240 there used vaginally ten percent other than anally, and we 0:17:08.359 --> 0:17:13.040 were about to you know, try. I mean, we're experience. 0:17:13.040 --> 0:17:16.480 I mean we're experimenting. Wow, what did you need to 0:17:16.560 --> 0:17:23.399 hide his penis? Oh my god? What? And that's the 0:17:23.520 --> 0:17:32.040 scene one. Scene number two is coming in from Kevin 0:17:32.119 --> 0:17:35.760 Prado Alcamaniac shot his right up to the top of 0:17:35.840 --> 0:17:39.600 the list. Uh, and it goes, uh, excuse me. Can 0:17:39.640 --> 0:17:42.040 I get some help over here? I think I've got 0:17:42.119 --> 0:17:45.080 a scene suggestion for you all, and nobody seems to 0:17:45.200 --> 0:17:48.240 be working around here. You know what, Let me speak 0:17:48.280 --> 0:17:51.520 to your manager, Macaroni. I think that was a call 0:17:51.560 --> 0:17:54.680 back to one of our scenes. I'm going to try 0:17:54.800 --> 0:17:59.560 something new here. The first line of the scene, if 0:17:59.600 --> 0:18:03.399 you're an is pardon me, do you have the time? 0:18:06.240 --> 0:18:15.359 Pardon me? You have the time? Yes? Um it's fifteen twelve. Ah, 0:18:15.560 --> 0:18:19.200 thank you. I knew this great grandfather Clark was off. 0:18:19.800 --> 0:18:23.600 I'm just crawl up inside here. Can't have the can't 0:18:23.640 --> 0:18:27.240 have the study looking not ship shape? Am I right? 0:18:28.520 --> 0:18:33.880 You are? Indeed you are, You're cracked. Indeed. M m hmm. 0:18:36.080 --> 0:18:38.280 Well hand me that tiny hand me that tiny screw 0:18:38.400 --> 0:18:41.320 driver over there on the on the settee. Will you 0:18:41.720 --> 0:18:46.040 James for Phillips head or just normal? No? No, no, 0:18:47.080 --> 0:18:53.040 James head, James, yes, James head, the Queen's head, the 0:18:53.080 --> 0:19:02.280 Queen's head right here, yes, and mist and I always 0:19:02.320 --> 0:19:04.639 have to talk my way through this. My father did 0:19:04.680 --> 0:19:06.920 that when I was a child, and back when this 0:19:07.080 --> 0:19:10.320 was just a grandfather clock, it became a great grandfather Clark. 0:19:10.400 --> 0:19:12.879 Now it's now it's a great grandfather clock. And I 0:19:15.240 --> 0:19:18.320 you know, I just every time I look at that 0:19:18.400 --> 0:19:20.760 portrait on the wall of him, every time I work 0:19:20.840 --> 0:19:25.360 with his clock, I just I miss him. I miss 0:19:26.040 --> 0:19:29.840 I miss his I miss his tweed, I miss his pipes, 0:19:29.880 --> 0:19:35.280 I miss his adventures. And Mrs Stack of maps, you 0:19:35.320 --> 0:19:38.080 know you don't have to miss him set what what 0:19:38.840 --> 0:19:43.639 what do you mean? Well? With this book here you 0:19:43.720 --> 0:19:46.399 can bring him back? Mr Penny? Are you saying that 0:19:46.480 --> 0:19:49.360 this book here is some sort of magical powers which 0:19:49.400 --> 0:19:52.520 I opened this book and my father will return. It's 0:19:52.600 --> 0:19:56.119 nice assimbly here to read some passages do do a thing? 0:19:56.280 --> 0:19:59.359 But yes, yes, in a nutshell, yes, what did you 0:19:59.440 --> 0:20:03.000 even get this book? Mr Penny? No? I got it 0:20:03.119 --> 0:20:07.399 from a book of Mystical arts shop, Yes, down on 0:20:07.440 --> 0:20:10.680 three Penny Street. My goodness, the cover is moving. That 0:20:11.160 --> 0:20:14.760 snake is moving on the cover is indeed, I'm just 0:20:14.840 --> 0:20:17.280 as to one knew that it comes with the price 0:20:17.480 --> 0:20:19.600 or something. I don't know. I didn't read that ahead. 0:20:19.760 --> 0:20:21.280 What does what does the stickers say? What is the 0:20:21.359 --> 0:20:26.520 price tag stickers say there it says forty four ninety 0:20:26.600 --> 0:20:31.040 five plus a curse. Oh well that's the price of 0:20:31.320 --> 0:20:35.359 Wait what what? What did I don't know? I didn't 0:20:35.400 --> 0:20:37.160 read that far ahead, Like I said, I just picked 0:20:37.200 --> 0:20:40.440 it out recently, just put it down, and you picked 0:20:40.480 --> 0:20:44.280 it up and did not notice that a curse was 0:20:44.760 --> 0:20:47.560 Was the curse also extracted from you upon the point 0:20:47.640 --> 0:20:50.200 of sale or is it something that you extract later? 0:20:50.880 --> 0:20:53.320 And I haven't used the book outs, I don't know 0:20:53.720 --> 0:20:57.760 if when the price will be paid? Just I'm assuming. 0:20:59.280 --> 0:21:04.760 I'm tearribly sorry. All sales are final. You're hoping to 0:21:05.040 --> 0:21:10.639 exchange the book? Yes, yes, yeah, yeah, yes, something with 0:21:11.040 --> 0:21:15.200 without a curse? Oh well, I'm terribly sorry. It says 0:21:15.560 --> 0:21:22.120 clearly on the price tag for plus occurs. So were 0:21:22.200 --> 0:21:24.720 I to take the book back, I'd also be taking 0:21:24.800 --> 0:21:29.480 the curse back. Yes, could could exchange it? Then? Could 0:21:29.640 --> 0:21:31.920 could there be an exchange for perhaps a book that 0:21:32.240 --> 0:21:35.040 that had a price and then perhaps I don't know, 0:21:35.200 --> 0:21:39.480 a minor penalty but not a full case. Well, I 0:21:39.880 --> 0:21:44.040 suppose it could be a book of a higher cost 0:21:45.240 --> 0:21:49.119 to offset the difference between a minor penalty and a curse. 0:21:49.240 --> 0:21:54.760 But that it's a pity large gap between those two. Right, Well, 0:21:54.800 --> 0:21:57.200 what kind of gap are we talking about here? No, 0:21:57.320 --> 0:22:00.639 I'd say at least a two hundred pound gap. I 0:22:00.960 --> 0:22:05.480 we'll be taking my book back and saying good day, sir. Well, 0:22:05.520 --> 0:22:07.680 I say good day to you, sir, I said, it's 0:22:07.680 --> 0:22:10.520 first good day to you. Well, I was in kind 0:22:10.600 --> 0:22:15.280 with good day, good day. Then excuse me, sorry, I 0:22:15.520 --> 0:22:18.120 had purchased a book at US not more than four 0:22:18.200 --> 0:22:22.480 or five days ago, and my ears fell off. First, 0:22:22.960 --> 0:22:25.720 my nose seems to be wiggling. I want to return it. 0:22:26.240 --> 0:22:29.600 I want to return I'm sorry, sir sales. So final 0:22:30.200 --> 0:22:32.600 did you happen to purchase a book with a curse? 0:22:34.119 --> 0:22:36.160 He was? He was a holler and I didn't eine 0:22:36.200 --> 0:22:41.200 plush terrible life threatening cursefully, I mean again, our stickers 0:22:41.440 --> 0:22:45.400 are incredibly explicit in terms of what you're getting. Uh 0:22:46.000 --> 0:22:48.520 and uh, I mean are you disappointed? I mean your 0:22:48.600 --> 0:22:51.240 your ear fell off? I mean, does that not constitute 0:22:52.240 --> 0:22:54.320 he was a gift for someone else, said, I didn't 0:22:54.359 --> 0:23:00.879 realize the curse is gonna go to me. Hey, I 0:23:01.000 --> 0:23:03.240 finished that book that you got for me. That was 0:23:03.400 --> 0:23:10.280 so so sweet of you. Oh really, anything weird happening 0:23:10.359 --> 0:23:15.280 to you. No, I don't know why you finished the 0:23:15.320 --> 0:23:18.040 whole book. I finished. I finished the whole book. I 0:23:18.119 --> 0:23:20.440 read the whole thing cover to cover. I think, you know, 0:23:20.520 --> 0:23:24.200 I always thought that this is gonna sound silly, But 0:23:25.080 --> 0:23:28.119 ever since I got you know, the promotion above you, 0:23:28.320 --> 0:23:30.280 I thought that maybe you didn't like me. I thought 0:23:30.320 --> 0:23:33.800 maybe you would try to sabotage me somehow. But you 0:23:34.280 --> 0:23:36.160 show up with it. You don't feel like a fever 0:23:36.320 --> 0:23:39.879 coming on. No, not at all. It's I thought it 0:23:39.960 --> 0:23:43.359 was really sweet, and I have to say, oh my gosh, 0:23:43.440 --> 0:23:48.520 what did you spin out one of your teeth? No, 0:23:48.680 --> 0:23:51.399 that one was loose, that one was already Oh what 0:23:51.480 --> 0:23:56.879 about that one? I gotta I gotta go, I gotta go. 0:23:57.000 --> 0:23:59.240 Oh my, Well, thank you for the book. I'm glad 0:23:59.240 --> 0:24:04.280 we're not enemy, but you have to return the book. 0:24:04.280 --> 0:24:06.879 But it wasn't the stake I thought. I thought that. 0:24:07.600 --> 0:24:09.960 I said that the curse was gonna go with the book. 0:24:10.600 --> 0:24:13.480 Well did you purchase a did you get a gift 0:24:13.560 --> 0:24:18.320 receipt along with it? M hmm, I see. Well, when 0:24:18.359 --> 0:24:21.680 you get a gift receipt, then you can deliver the 0:24:21.720 --> 0:24:25.680 gift receipt and the curse onto the recipient. Is it 0:24:25.800 --> 0:24:30.240 too late to get a gift receipt? I'm afraid it is. Oh, 0:24:31.720 --> 0:24:37.040 excuse me, I'd like to return this book please. Ah, 0:24:37.400 --> 0:24:39.440 this is my day, This is my day, every day. 0:24:39.600 --> 0:24:44.040 Isn't it just just doing returns? Yes? What? What? What? What? 0:24:44.280 --> 0:24:50.440 May I ask? Is your concern ready player too? Oh? Yes? 0:24:50.600 --> 0:24:54.480 Yes it did? It sucked, didn't it? Yeah, it really did. 0:24:54.680 --> 0:24:57.960 I did read the entire things some some reason, and 0:24:58.000 --> 0:25:00.480 then I always told that that was the curse, reading 0:25:00.560 --> 0:25:03.479 the whole book. So I feel like I can return 0:25:03.600 --> 0:25:07.399 it now? Yes? Yes? Uh? And how much did you 0:25:07.440 --> 0:25:12.320 pay for it? I paid fourteen cents a rip off 0:25:12.400 --> 0:25:14.920 if you asked me. I'm happy to give you a 0:25:15.000 --> 0:25:16.720 money back, but please keep the book as well. I 0:25:16.800 --> 0:25:20.119